my girlfriend and i broke up and one of the reasons was because i talked abt ur streams too much. So.

Good you don't wanna date someone that's WEAK

We don't talk much, but I just gotta say, I miss you and I hope that you're okay.

Stayed up late looking through old art because an archive is down. Then stayed up waaay to late trying to find old friends and mutuals and have failed (as usual, many of them the type to nuke their online presence without warning and start up again with a new name)

And I'm sitting here thinking through why I want to find them (close friends I miss deeply, someone who i'd been close with but we had a misunderstanding and I've never fully been able to apologize or explain now that I am in much better mental health, some who I was only a little aware of but am curious about)

And I think, for most if not all, I don't even want to have a connection if they don't. That's fine. I understand. We are adults with lives and other problems. I just want to be able to check in. To see you are around. To see what you're creating, if you are.

I don't have to be part of that. But they were all such large pieces in my journey of growing up. And to never be able to check in makes me sad.

Anyway, expect nostalgia art from my highschool OCs. Cause in trying to find something I re-read a bunch of shit. (And with the lense of NOT SEVERELY DEPRESSED AND BEEN THROUGH MANY YEARS OF THERAPY I'm now like SHITFUCKDAMMIT I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND and tears lol)

Sneaky gets bit by a stray cat while on leave and has to get rabies shots.

Afterwards, she secretly decides to get “rabies free” tattooed on a buttcheek.

The boys catch a glimpse after she shifts back to human form and absolutely LOSE IT

(I am definitely not debating on that tattoo myself because I just got bit by a stray cat and had to get shots)

🦝🦝🦝

Okay first off: OUCH. FUCKING OUCH. I'm so sorry, I've heard the rabies shots are like the actual worst. I hope you're okay!!

Second: that is such a Sneaky thing to do. Both getting bit and getting tattooed about it. She doesn't even tell the guys, just gets it done.

Now... who would notice it first? 👀

Mike: You can track Dustin? Suzie: Of course I can. If the NSA can do it, so can I.

I love Josh with my entire being and this wasn’t his fault, but this is the PERFECT example of why I wish they’d just do regular interviews again. Like actual sit down, video interviews. This makes me sad. I bet he’s so embarrassed. ☹️

(also can we talk about how incredibly sexy his voice sounds like hell yes amen)

- Obligatory Sad Girl Post -

Catching up on Criminal Minds and sobbing but I can't talk to YOU about it

It fucking sucks and I miss you and JFC this fucking sucks

You got me into it again but now I have nobody who cares. I miss our passionate talks and theories and yet I know that's not enough to try

Lia 🥺

Hey sweetheart

-Hanma

Hi baby, my love, I missed you so so much. Did you miss me? Don't worry, I didn't get into any trouble, I was on my best behaviour.

(hey precious, I hope you're holding up okay, thinking about u Kay?🥺💞)

Do you ever just like. Start feeling painfully lame out of nowhere?

if I had a penny for every time i felt like that, I'd be a fucking billionaire.

But you're not LAME. you just don't know how to love parts of yourself. It never comes out of nowhere. You can sense it in the way you grow quieter when someone indirectly insults you, in the ways you keep desperately reaching for conversation when there's none to be had. People put band-aids on your broken bones and expect it to be all right. You expect it to be all right. No amount of motivational "you're enough!!" posts made by people who don't fucking get it will make anything all right. It numbs the pain for a while. Whatever keeps you going.

No amount of people telling you 'you've just got to try' will help. Because you're trying, aren't you? You're not laying down to die. You're not boring or lame or repulsive or any of those things. You feel it sometimes. But you're not.

Either you're too big or too small or too loud or soft or not pretty enough or you wish for something someone else has and beat yourself up for feeling these things. Love is slow.

Focus on the smaller things. Literally anything that helps you get through the day. Fuck the people that talk shit about you. If your brain and heart whisper evil things in your ears, beat the shit out of them. You're not lame. Repeat that sentence. It might work. It might not.

But it will never completely go away. You need to learn to live with things like these. But you can damn well fight it, too.

I always worry a lot when someone I speak to regularly online disappears. I understand people need space, and breaks, etc, but I do worry.

I wrote a songggggggg about getting better

It’s a feeling I can’t remember

🐕🐕

How are you doing this fine evening... morning...idk what time it is for you

well i was feeling ver awake and now I'm suddenly sleeby.

Is it just me or does Kit's tweet really make me want to punch people in their face?

Like come on, it's 2022, just be respectful to each other or shut the fuck up. It's not that hard.

Also, sending Kit lots of love and hugs ❤

I'm convinced people on AO3 have brain damage because I'm actively gagging at the fic I wrote and then I see this

Damn, another one of my fave mutuals is gone... and this one hurts. 💔😥