Chamomile Comic Trivia #28

#146 - Really

This story arc was vaguely inspired by my job experience. I am A manager but not THE manager at my reluctant retail day job, but there's always something stupid happening and I've had to run the place for anywhere between a week to a month or two so many times over the years, so I had a few experiences to draw jokes out of.

#147 - My

Having said that, I feel no ownership or pride of authority, so this one is just fun with characters. In my head, the place that the customer goes to for buying something is just "the till" so I remember it took me a while to come up with, of all things, the words "service counter" - something for Layla to refer to that area by that didn't sound completely unnatural in dialogue.

#148 - Follow

Now this one IS very much based on my own experience going to management meetings and training days. Fleeting moments of inspiration in how to improve things and community with fellow management - followed by immediately getting slammed back down to earth by how hard the ideas would be to implement due to constantly stingy hours and how it's all just about making money in the end.

I remember once pointing out a hypocrisy in a company process during a training meeting. The trainer conceded to my point making sense then came to the conclusion of... "do it like we said anyway". Cool.

The fact that Layla is making notes and paying attention while veteran managers to her left and right doze off was also true to my experience, lmao.

#149 - Help

Very important lore drop here - the addition of the cute little staff only spiral staircase upstairs in the corner of the shop, which was a memorably fun thing to decide "I really want this in Cammie's shop, I'm always fascinated by them when I see them in a shop and ever since I was little always very upset I can't go up and down them" and then realise "right now I have to figure out how to draw that!!". I've checked the blurry backgrounds for the two comics where this corner of the shop was visible before and there wasn't any sign of it, so this is a very light retcon (those blurry backgrounds were very vague anyway though). A rare case of it being more sensible to draw the background in full since it was getting used for all 4 panels, so enjoy some uncensored spiral staircase:

I remember coming up with this joke when a Uni friend was visiting and we were just sort of riffing off each other with work related jokes or something, so this comic takes me back to fond memories of said visit generally!

If you look carefully you can see Layla has already performed her management teleportation spell in panel 3, behind the thief's open jacket.

#150 - Stop

The big 150! Well, it feels like a special number at this stage (250 also feels special, and then after that the 50s don't so much anymore for whatever reason). Either way I decided to do a quadruple lengther!

I haven't always followed this rule but I decided at this time at least, for extra-length comics, I still wanted each "page" to at least vaguely stand-up as a standalone comic too. In that context, the main purpose of going extra length is to keep the pace on a scene which I don't want dragging out across a whole month.

The spot Cammie runs by in this panel is the same one from comic #56, Cammie's footprints permanently a part of this street's history now. I know for sure these two extras in the foreground will show up in a few future comics when I couldn't be bothered to design new ones too.

The "helping the old ladies across the street" part of this chase is one of my favourite comedy scenes I've come up with over the years, I don't remember at all where it came from, I just enjoy it as a reader now, haha! I'm particularly proud his look back and Cammie's responding glare.

On the flipside I wish I could have come up with something a bit more meaningful than just "there is a dead end" to finish the chase but it's not really super important, the seagull joke is the point.

And now for something that hasn't come up in a Trivia post before - significant unused content!

For a short time I was thinking about following the above with a new arc dealing with an actual fallout from the shoplifting incident, with two comics scripted out. It's been years and I've never used or repurposed these so I think it's safe to share them. I reserve the right to still use a variance of these one day if it really feels right for another story though, not everyone reads these trivia posts, haha!

I'll let the scripts speak for themselves first.

Unused #151:

Unused #152:

From here the idea was that Bri and Cammie would have had a falling out for a little while (maybe a couple months worth of comics I was thinking) due to Bri, her dearest and most understanding friend, outright calling her stupid in the heat of her deep concern, sort of an expansion of the little moment where Vi genuinely hurt Cammie's feelings by referring to her "rampant idiocy" back in #59 / #62.

But as the deadline to begin work on the #151 approched I just wasn't coming up with anything I liked to follow that thread through, so in the end it didn't happen and we got... *flips page* a comic about Cammie putting a bucket on her head instead! Good stuff.

I still think canonically, Bri wouldn't have approved of Cammie's chase, but in this case she kept her frustrations to herself!

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The OM! Characters as Retail Workers/Positions from my old job

Full disclosure: I’ve only had 1 retail job, and it was at a Homegoods. I worked there for 3+ years during college. Because I’ve only had this one experience, my below hc’s for the boys may be a little...specific to my previous job, and not universal traits that come with all retail jobs. 

Also I’m not including Luke because thattttt is child labor.

This is probably a very self-indulgent headcannon. Oh well.

Lucifer: 

(One of) the store managers. Specifically the assistant manager.

Nice to customers to their face, but will fantasize about stabbing them once they leave. 

Asmo once walked past the manager’s office and witnessed Lucifer professionally apologizing to a bitching customer over the phone, only to slam the receiver down moments later, sighing and mumbling “what an idiot.”

Very watchful of his staff. Do not slack off while he’s working....unless he likes you. In which case, he will take a moment to chat with you and give himself a much needed break. 

If he doesn’t like you, well...make yourself busy, or else you’ll get a stern talking to, and likely written up. Lucifer already has too much work to get done--he doesn’t want to babysit his staff.

Quietly schedules the people he likes to work during his shifts whenever he can, since he knows he can trust them to do their work. Not to mention, he enjoys their company a lot.

His favorite crew to have is Beel, Asmo, and Satan (and MC). Their schedules, of course, don’t always line up, but when they do he seriously thinks that he has the dream team.

Mammon: 

Cannot be trusted to actually organize the store, so he gets stuck at the registers.

However, the managers quickly realize that he's shit at anything front-end related aside from counting money (the man likes his money), and that he's prone to pulling out his phone when no one is around, so Lucifer forces him to work the floor. 

They start trying to give him more backroom shifts (because if he's not doing his work, they'll be able to tell easier).

HOWEVER--because Mammon is such a money lover, he’s very aware of every piece of expensive merchandise in the store. So if a customer attempts to switch tags, or peels the price tag off hoping to pull a quick one on the cashier, his coworkers always call him up so he can take a look.

Seriously, the amount of people that try to buy the $100+ gem rocks for $9.99 is crazy.

He feels very proud of himself whenever he manages to stop a customer from getting away with it.

He’s not the best worker in general, but the mangers would be lying if the said they didn’t appreciate his knack for remembering the expensive items.

Levi: 

Cash office.

Prefers to sit in the locked office by himself, listening to music on his phone as he runs checks the register balances from the previous day.

If he's not doing cash office, he's probably out gathering carts, or compacting boxes in the back.

Whatever keeps him away from the bulk of customers.

Whenever the managers need him to go help out on the floor, he gets permission to not wear his apron.

He seriously does not want anyone to talk to him. He just wants to work in peace.

Of course, if he’s seen organizing, or stocking shelves, customers tend to assume he’s an employee anyway--even without the apron.

Levi legitimately jumps anytime someone calls out to him and asks if he works there, and if he can help them. 

Oh, and he always brings his Switch to work and plays games on his lunch break. Do not talk to him if he’s playing his game--he will get mad at you.

Satan: 

Flow & mark-downs.

He's basically an all-rounder, but is superior to the others in putting out new merchandise (flow). He knows where things go, and how they should be organized. 

Secretly gets annoyed when customers ask him for help when he's in the zone, but is very good at faking a smile.

Will do what’s asked of him without any lip in return.

However, rude customers should beware of him, because his anger tends to flip on like a switch. If a customer is badmouthing him, or one of his coworkers--he has no issue telling them they’re a fool, and that they should just leave instead of causing issues.

He gets in trouble with management for doing this, but honestly has no regrets.

Definitely has regular customers that he is enemies with.

Gets left in charge of the store if the managers ever need to step away for their lunch break, or otherwise.

Asmo: 

Lead cashier. 

Super charming, great customer service voice. 

Always gives a good impression on the phone, and manages to make peppy announcements. 

If there’s ever a fundraiser going on, and the cashiers are supposed to ask for donations, Asmo is guaranteed to rake in the most.

He is very good at calming a customer if they're upset--apologizing and and being so sweet and polite that it’s nearly impossible to stay mad.

However, if they're rude to him, or his apologies go on deaf ears, he has no problem politely telling them to fuck off.

If he’s not at the registers, he’s probably off in the bath section--smelling soap--or the candle section--sniffing literally every candle in existence.

He’ll also be sure to get a whiff of whatever candle/soap a customer has brought to the register to purchase.

Runs off to visit other stores in the mall/strip when he’s on his break. (Aka. he spends way too much of his paycheck shopping).

Beel: 

Back room - heavy lifter. 

Dude spends most of the day in the stock room emptying the truck and building furniture.

Seriously can move big things with very little effort. He once carried an entire couch out onto the sales floor buy himself. 

While other coworkers may need to use carts or flatbeds to move larger items, Beel can legit just throw them over his shoulder and continue on his way like he’s not carrying anything at all.

He looks intimidating but is actually super friendly.

Will always work extra hours if you ask him to. Will also come in for extra shifts if you ask him to.

He always feels so guilty if he can’t accept, or needs to call off.

The type of coworker that goes out to buy snacks on his break, and ends up buy snacks for the rest of the staff. He just leaves them on the break room table with a note that says “Eat up :)”

Belphie: 

Closer - Sales Floor. 

The managers tried to work him on morning or midday shifts, but he was continuously too groggy, and ended up knocking things over on accident.

Hes more energetic at night, so they put him on the sales floor (since he’s honestly...not the best at the register. Don’t get me wrong, he can work the register as well as anyone else, but...he just...doesn’t sound friendly. (Lucifer: “Belphie...at least try to sound like you’re not working here against your will when talking to the customers. You applied for this job.”))

He honestly doesn't mind organizing merchandise, but gets annoyed if he ends up doing the bulk of the work. (Whether it’s because they’re short staffed, or because his coworkers are slacking).

Has no problem telling customers to gtfo when it’s closing time.

If people are still in the store 5 minutes after closing, he’ll follow them around until they finally take the hint and leave.

Always stops for fast food on his way home after work because making himself a meal sounds like too much effort.

Diavolo:

Store Manager.

Is very kind to all of his employees, but will also have hard conversations with them if there’s an issue regarding their performance that needs to be addressed.

However, he always does his best to maintain good relationships with everyone he works with.

Will buy lunch for the staff on busy weekends, even if he has to pay for the food himself. He wants to let his employees know that they’re appreciated, and while he’s the type to give verbal affirmation of a job well done, a luncheon doesn’t hurt either.

Even if customers are bitchy, he never raises his voice, or yells. He handles complaints like a champ.

If the customer physically or verbally abuses one of his workers, however...he will threaten to call the police. Do not fuck with his work children.

If his employees ever find him sighing, or looking like he’s stressed, then they know he’s definitely having a rough day. Please work hard, and help him out, and he’ll very much appreciate it. 

Barbatos:

The 4th key. (Basically a manager)

Some workers are scared of him because he always seems to be in a good mood--even if the store is packed, and things get overwhelming.

A very by-the-book type. While Lucifer and Diavolo may allow for some things to get overlooked, or for there to be a lapse in proper procedure, Barbatos is not like that. Rules are rules, and they shall be followed.

Honestly is a very nice guy, but working a closing shift with him can be the worst. Especially if Diavolo is the opening manager the next day. 

He will keep his staff there after closing as long as he needs to for the store to be in an acceptable condition. (The worst part is that Diavolo honestly is so easy going that if Barbatos had just opted to say “we were very busy and didn’t have the time to get everything done”, Diavolo wouldn’t blame him. Shit gets crazy).

Alas, Barbatos wants to please Diavolo and takes his role very seriously.

At least he brings in homemade baked goods for the staff sometimes. (His good cooking usually makes up for all the times he has kept them late).

Solomon:

Another all rounder. Usually get scheduled on midday shifts to bridge the gap between the openers, and closers. 

Is very good at keeping up his “customer service” facade. 

However, once there are no customers around his smile will fall, and he’ll mumble complaints under his breath. 

“Why does one couple need 15 candles?” “Lady, I don’t care about your chihuahua’s sleeping habits--just buy the pet bed already.”

Will always tease his coworkers if he gets along with them. Bickering with Solomon can become a very entertaining past time if he likes you.

Whenever new crystals, or rocks come in, usually he’ll spend a while inspecting them. Apparently he can tell which ones are real, or fake. (And he always ends up buying the real ones).

He’s the type of coworker that will sneak up behind you and scare you when you’re not paying attention. Just because he can. (Fight him, he loves it).

Simeon: 

One of the sweetest staff members, but he’s prone to getting flustered and making mistakes.

If he’s on registers, he’s so busy trying to start a conversation with the customer that he’ll short them on their change. 

Luckily, the customer is either patient in waiting for the manager to come up and open the register, or doesn’t care about the 22 cents Simeon forgot to give them.

He loves reorganizing the towel section of the store the most. Getting to stand there and refold towels almost feels like meditation to him.

Always goes out of his way to ask the customer if he can help them with anything, or if they’re finding everything alright.

Is prone to accidentally cutting himself when something sharp breaks. (It has literally gotten to the point where if a ceramic plate or something glass breaks, the managers have instructed Simeon to call someone else to clean it up, rather than doing it himself.)

Honestly, in the end, he’s a fabulous worker tho.

October writting challenge

I’m going to be participating on the October Writting challenge from today on, the fics will be posted at the same time here on Tumblr and on Ao3. I chose to do this because i want to try and learn to write shorter chapters, and try to get out of my comfort zone and improvise. 

I also added the bonus that i would write the short stories with the first idea that came to mind, no matter how stupid it was, as a sort of challenge to myself. You’ll notice that when you read the first story lmao.

So, that said, the promt list i’ll be following can be found here, done by @horrificmemes ,and i leave you the first prompt down here. Enjoy! And do leave a comment if you feel like it :D

OCTOBER WRITTING CHALLENGE

DAY 1: REVENGE (TASTES SWEET)

Lance narrowed his eyes as he looked in the fridge, roaming over the expanse of the shelves as he looked for the thing. You know? The thing he'd been saving for weeks for when he had a bad day™ , the thing that he was craving right now, but was nowhere in sight.

Maybe it was behind the mayonnaise? Nope, not there.

Uhh...maybe he put it under the bowl of oranges? Nah, not there either. It wasn't on the veggie drawer, neither on the egg shelf or covered by the huge lettuce on the top corner. He knew for a fact that he'd stored it safely and carefully on their fridge, awaiting the day he'd need it, so for it to have suddenly disappeared it could only mean one thing...

"Keith, babe, did you eat a small chocolate cake that was on the fridge?" It was swiss chocolate sponge cake with a creamy mousse-like filling and topped with a coffee glaze. In other words, heaven on earth. It had costed him fifteen bucks, bought from one of the best patisseries in town, and he'd been really excited to taste it, so he was a teensy bit pissed right now.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Keith raise a brow from the sofa, humming softly before answering him. "No, i didn't. I don't remember anything like that on our fridge, are you sure you didn't eat it already?" He gasped dramatically, turning around with a hand above his heart, feigning hurt -which wasn't difficult because he was exhausted and now disappointed- as he rose his finger to point at Keith.

"How can you say that!? I would know if i ate something so delicious. I left it on the top right, like, three days ago, i was waiting for a hellish day like today to eat it so i would feel better, and now it's gone." He pouted, crossing his arms as his boyfriend looked at him with an amused expression, which, rude.

"Sorry Lance, but i really don't know what happened to it, maybe we threw it out without noticing? There was a lot of trash and spoiled food that we had to take care of  two days ago, right? Maybe we didn't see it?" It was a possibility. They discovered, as soon as they began living together, that they were horrible at managing their food.

Sometimes they bought too much and it ended up spoiled, or they forgot it was there and didn't eat it, passing the due date and having to ponder if it was still fit for human consumption when they finally found it. (It wasn't.)

Other times, they bought ingredients to make dinner themselves, but would miscalculate the amount, and the veggies and fruit would go bad, leaving a stench that wasn't at all pleasant and a whole lot of mold no one wanted to clean but had to. And then there were the times when they bought too little, and ate so much junk food the leftovers piled inside the fridge and became a mishmash of burger and fries that looked to have gained sentience.

Which was what happened two days ago. So maybe the cake had been caught in the crossfire and ended in the trashcan. The mere thought just made him want to weep.

It had looked so good, with such a shiny glaze, and the sponge cake seemed really fluffy too....Ugh, he cursed his back luck.

"I'm sorry about your cake, Lance. Wanna tell me about your day?" Keith laid down on the couch and opened his arms, and he immediately threw himself at him, knowing his boyfriend wouldn't even flinch, since he was ripped, and also a personal trainer at the local gym.

He took a second to feel Keith's arms around him, the warmth of his body and the smell of his shampoo, the dips and creases of his chest and the toned muscles that cradled him and made him feel safe. " Ugh, it's been the worst. So, i was just going around doing my thing, you know? Putting things on shelves like normal, when this douche of a dude comes out of nowhere and begins harassing me-" He babbled and seethed and didn't stop speaking for a long, long while.

But Keith never interrupted unless it was to ask a question in concern or add his own input about the absolutely annoying and unbelievable people in Lance's line of work.

Retail.

By the time he finished his tale, he was breathing hard, hands clenched on Keith's sweater as he struggled not to cry. He hated his job, and the people there -except Hunk, Hunk was an angel sent by god to keep him sane- but he didn't have a choice until he saved enough money to pay for the damages done to his car in a small accident a few months ago.

And then he still had to pay for his degree after, he owed a lot of money still.

Working in retail was actually just a temporary job, he was waiting to finally work on what he really loved, the career he had worked hard for and studied to get a degree on.

Teaching.

He wanted to teach children, he'd always been good with them, and it had been his dream since he could remember, he'd drained himself dry to achieve that dream, and it was about to become a reality.

He had a place already, a small school managed by Mrs.Allura, who had told him that when Coran -one of the oldest teachers there- retired, Lance would take his place and finally make his title of teacher official. But until then, he had to keep paying bills and repairs and what not, so what had he done? Look for a temporary job to keep them afloat while he got his dream job.

And it was killing him.

Thank god it was only another month.

He didn't think he'd been able to take much more of that.

"You know you could always leave that job, right? I don't mind paying for things until Allura finally employs you, she's a friend- well, more like a sister, really- and we know she won't go back on her word." He knew, of course he knew. Keith's brother, Shiro, and his husband, Adam, were friends with Allura since high school, and that, by default, made Keith her friend, and therefore Lance, too.

But Lance was stubborn and headstrong, and damned prideful while he was at it too. He felt like a leech if he wasn't contributing to keeping their household afloat, it always made him feel guilty and inadequate, like he wasn't enough for Keith, like he deserved better.

"Hey, c'mon now, stop thinking so much. It was only a suggestion, you don't have to do it if you don't want to. I only want you to be happy." Lance only grumbled in response, burrowing his head on the crook of Keith's neck, curling up like a child and not caring at all that he sounded whiny.

"A chocolate cake would've made me happy..." He whispered, and felt Keith sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair, his other hand rubbing circles on his back and making him sleepy.

"I think it's time to go sleep, Lance. You have an early shift tomorrow, don't you?" He groaned and refused to get up, but his boyfriend already knew about his bad habits and picked him up effortlessly, walking to their bed and laying him down softly before dropping a chaste kiss to his lips, then leaving to brush his teeth.

Lance, meanwhile, giggled like a love-struck teenager, rolled around like a burrito, and stopped right at the edge with his arms dangling over the side of the mattress, head tilted to the left as his eyes bore on the trashcan right by Keith's desk.

He focused intently and thought he saw red, and as he narrowed his eyes and squinted, he could read the word ' Olkar-' . He gasped and got up, running to dig into the trashcan, taking out the purple-red envelope that said 'Okarion Patisserie', the exact same one that he'd bought that chocolate cake from.

So Keith had lied to him. He had eaten his cake. Wow, talk about honesty.

He wasn't even mad anymore, just...kind of sad? Disappointed maybe? It wasn't a big deal, not anymore since Keith had soothed his worries and listened to his ranting, which made him feel better. Keith's affectionate touches, comforting words and his silent support always did that to him.

But that had been a really nice cake.

A bit of revenge was in order.

McClain style.

--

The next day, as Keith left for work, Lance -who still had a few hours before he himself had to go- went out to buy some pie, the apple one that he knew his boyfriend liked so much. And just because he was already there, he took some things their fridge was missing, humming a little tune all the way, thinking about how many photos he was gonna snap that same evening.

It was going to be hilarious.

He got home and dumped the things on their respective places, and, because he was so thorough with his pranks, he took the bottle of chilly sauce out of the bag, opened the apple pie, and spilled a few drops on the filling before closing it again, then put the envelope back together like nothing had happened.

And just to be sure it worked, he left a sweet note telling Keith it was for him, even signing it with a kiss and a few hearts.

Feeling lighter and with a smirk blooming on his face, Lance left for work, giddy and eager for his shift to end so he could laugh at Keith, and then berate him for lying and ask for kisses in compensation....

As soon as his lips weren't on fire anymore, of course.

--

Six hours later, and Lance was ready to call it a day. He quickly dressed himself and said good-bye to Hunk -who left with his girlfriend- running towards the bus stop so he was sure he didn't miss it, glancing longingly at the store on the far end of the street, the one that was now closed because of repairs and wouldn't open until a few months down the line.

'Adios, my sweet cake, it's sad that i never got to taste you.' He bemoaned, brushing away an invisible tear just as the bus arrived, going to take him home to where his boyfriend would probably be screaming to the high heavens, his mouth on fire with no way to make it stop, since he couldn't drink milk.

'Just cold water for you, mister liar.' He chuckled to himself, knowing for a fact that Keith could take spicy without trouble, but it would still annoy him to no end, leaving him grumbling and pouting until Lance smoothed out his frown with a few kisses here and there.

Ah, he couldn't wait.

--

As soon as he got home and caught sight of Keith, slumped on the floor cradling his stomach while he groaned, he reassessed his previous thought; he could definitely wait.

He threw his bag unceremoniously to the floor, closing the door with his foot and running towards his boyfriend, cradling his sweaty face in his hands as he worriedly asked him what was wrong.

"I dunno....i think it's- ugh- someting i ate." Lance brushed his bangs away and tried to feel for a fever, but found nothing, and he seemed coherent and alert, just in pain, which was a relief.

"Babe, what did you eat? Did it smell bad? Was it past its due date-?" keith shook his head, pushing his hands harder against his stomach, one of them going to cover his mouth as he coughed a little. Lance was beginning to panic.

"No- just...that apple pie -Lance froze- you bought for me, did you check the label for dairy?" Lance nodded fervently, relieved, he always checked the labels on everything, it was second nature to him now. Keith was lactose intolerant, and it always made him feel like shit when he accidentally ate some, nothing that wouldn't go away the next day but- not pretty, he didn't like it when Keith suffered.

"Yeah, it didn't have any so ..." He held Keith's arms and led him to the couch.

"Ugh, my mouth burns.......i- is that...normal?" Lance stopped short, the gears inside his brain turning as he caught up to one small tiny detail; the chilly sauce. He wanted to laugh to himself, saying it was impossible, that it made no sense a chilly sauce would have lactose or anything but- but he had to check, had to make sure. "Wait here just a sec." He fled through their house and opened the drawer in the kitchen, taking out the bottle and reading the too small letters-

'Allergens notice: Contains milk.' And there it was, Lance's mistake. He was always so careful, so thorough, but he'd been too excited to exact a petty revenge on his boyfriend, and now he felt like shit because of him, with an added burn to boot. He threw the bottle inside the bin, and ran all the way to the lounge, crouching before Keith, ready to fess up.

"I'm sorry- i didn't meant to- i didn't check and- you know i always check-" Keith put a hand on his mouth, effectively shutting him up.

"Slowly, Lance, i can't understand a word you're -ugh- saying." He took a deep breath, gulping down the nausea rising in his throat, looking up into Keith's pained face and tearing up when he noticed just how pale and sick he looked.

"I- i found the wrapping of- of the cake i bought in our room and- and i was so mad because i wanted it so much but- but i was angrier at the fact that you lied to me so- so i...i wanted to get back at you." Keith groaned and doubled over, and Lance nearly fell in his haste to hold him in between his arms, rubbing his back in what he hoped were comforting motions.

"So- so you-what? Gave me milk as- as revenge?" Horrified that Keith would think he would ever do something like that to him on purpose, the tears that had been gathering in the corners of his eyes finally fell, a small steady stream down his cheeks.

"Wh- no! I would never-!" His breath hitched, and he struggled to talk through his hiccups. "I bought t-the pie you love so much a-and put some chilly s-sauce inside as a- a prank." He sniffed, trying to be silent, hoping that Keith would continue looking away. He hated crying, but he hated even more when someone saw him do it, it made him feel...weak.

"I just w-wanted a little p-payback but i f-forgot to check the label o-of the sauce....I-I'm sorry Keith..." His boyfriend finally looked up, his bout of nausea -or maybe cramps- seemingly over. He let out a sigh of relief, but his calm expression faded rapidly as he looked up at Lance, and then his face turned pained, eyes wide and slightly panicked.

"Hey, hey, c'mon  it's fine, don't cry. You know i won't die from this. It'll suck, yeah, but by tomorrow night i will be right as rain." Keith opened his arms in invitation and, although he felt guilty and undeserving of affection right now, his body knew what he wanted before his mind catched up to his thoughts, and he was throwing himself at his boyfriend, curling with him on the couch as he sniffed pathetically.

"I'm so sorry...you know i would never do this to you on purpose....i hate it when you are hurt." He felt the steady rise and fall of the other's chest, the warmth of his arms around his body, holding him tight, their legs curling together as Keith sought closeness, cuddling being something that made him feel better when he was sick.

"I know, i'm sorry too. I didn't mean it, i know you would never do something like that, and i'm...sorry about your cake, too. I was half asleep that day after classes, finished too late and was about to faint with both hunger and exhaustion. I just...opened the fridge and ate the first thing i got my hands on...i didn't even notice it was your cake until i had already finished." Lance shook his head, muttering that he didn't care about that as much as the fact that he'd lied to him about it, and, even then, he wasn't that mad about it.

He loved Keith, he wasn't about to have a fight for something as silly as food, it just so happened that that day had been a very bad one for him, and his only solace had been that small piece of heaven he had stored for emergencies.

"S'okay, was silly anyways, i was just really ticked off that day, it wasn't your fault. We share everything, i've eaten things that were yours too, sometimes, and you've never berated me for it." Keith hummed in acknowledgment, the vibrations calming his nerves and making him relax bit by bit until he was sure he was going to fall asleep right then and there.

He always said that the most comfortable place in the whole world was between Keith's arms.

He still stood by that.

"Yeah, well, i'm working on what i like, and i don't get stressed as much as you do. I know how bad your job can get, and how you're doing your best until Allura hires you officially, so i don't mind indulging you sometimes, as long as you don't make a habit out of it." He chuckled, rubbing his forehead against Keith's chest, inhaling the scent of his soap and feeling the beating of his heart, like a lullaby soothing him to sleep.

"I don't know what i did to deserve you." He said, cuddling closer against Keith.

"You were pretty persistent, that's what." He pretended to be offended, then sighed in content when Keith nuzzled against the crook of his neck, his breath ghosting over his ear and sending a shiver down his spine. "Lance..." The whisper of his name made warmth travel down the length of his body, and a shaky suspire left him before he could help it, his hands running over the expanse of Keith's back as the other leaned closer and then-

"You're going to want to move, i have to go to the bathroom like- now." Lance somersaulted over the side of the couch, watching with grief as Keith ran towards the bathroom, where he would most likely spend the rest of the night. He crawled over to the door with a pillow and a blanket, and curled into a ball as he waited for his boyfriend to come out, even if he had to wait till morning with him.

This had been his fault, after all, so he would take care of him and make sure Keith had all he needed and was as comfortable as possible until he felt better.

It was the least he could do.

--

By the time Keith stopped feeling indisposed, the sun had begun to rise, and Lance had stayed awake every minute, giving him water and medicine and supplements, blankets and soft touches and whatever he needed so he would get better.

It had been a long night, but the one who'd most suffered had been Keith, so he had no right to complain. He just carried his tired boyfriend to their bed, tucked him in like a blanket burrito, and gave him cuddles till he fell asleep, smiling softly when the crease of his brow finally disappeared and his expression smoothed out into a calm, relaxed one.

Soft breaths left Keith's lips, and, thinking he was knocked out, Lance began talking to himself, something that always helped him calm down. "I'm really sorry about this...i'm such an idiot, i shouldn't have gotten so worked up over a stupid cake or hidden it like a child...i should have just told you.." At his side, Keith turned around and nuzzled his face on Lance's chest, discarding the blankets in favour of curling against him, legs intertwined, his dark hair tickling his chin and neck.

He felt like crying again.

"I'm so stupid, you always share everything with me, i shouldn't have gotten so upset. Ugh, i feel like the worst boyfriend ever..." A faint chuckle made him freeze, and his chest shook from Keith's small laughs, his arms tightening their grip just as he leaned away, looking into his purple eyes, sleepy and half-lidded but still awake.

"Stop beating yourself over it, Lance, it was just a joke. You know i like your jokes, one of the main reasons i began dating you was because they always blew up in your face or came back to bite you in the ass, it was funny." He pretended to be outraged, his hands pushing Keith away without any real force behind the motions.

"How dare you? I thought you dated me because of my extremely good looks and astounding intelligence?" Keith raised a brow, and looked him up and down without any kind of shame whatsoever.

"Well, you definitely have the looks... -Lance lit up- ...of an idiot." He gasped, screeching like a madman.

"Okay, first of all, rude. And second of all-" His tirade was stopped by warm lips being pressed to his, and he couldn't help but melt against Keith as he hugged him close and kissed him sweetly, fiercely and full of fire like he always did. They broke away after a while, and Lance could feel his face burning, noticing that his boyfriend's cheeks were tinted a soft red that probably rivaled his, both of them breathing hard.

"Well...that's one way of shutting me up. If you wanted to kiss me so much, you only had to ask, babe." He tried to smirk, but it probably came all soft and sappy and love-sick like, an expression he had no idea how it looked like, but that Pidge -Keith's partner at the gym- always said he made when he looked at his boyfriend.

Keith smiled, dimples on the corners of his lips. "And there's the Lance i know. Stop thinking so much about it, i'm not mad, and i know you didn't do it with malice, it was just a joke gone wrong. Forget about it, and go look in the fridge, okay?" Confused, but not willing to contradict his tired boyfriend, Lance got up and walked to their fridge, opening the door and coming face to face with-

A cake.

And not just any cake, but the exact same one he'd bought.

"Keith- what-?" He left the kitchen and ran towards their bedroom, watching Keith's features soften as he crushed the pillow between his arms.

" I felt really bad about eating your cake, you know? I asked Shiro if i could get out of work a bit early, and ran to the store to buy you another. I knew the place was always packed, and that i probably wouldn't be able to get any but- they were closing that day, and i really wanted to replace the one i ate." Lance sat on the edge of the bed, running his fingers through Keith's hair, listening to him sigh and snuggle, comfortable.

"So i waited in line for two hours to buy it." Lance stopped all movement, ready for the earth to open up and swallow him whole. God, he just wasn't a bad boyfriend, he had ascended to the worst boyfriend ever, he had no redemption now. "I just...wanted to see you smile, and if a cake was what you needed to feel happy, then i didn't mind. I hate it when you're stressed." Aaand Lance was gone, dead, deceased, he didn't deserve that cake, didn't deserve to even look at it, he was trash, the worst of the worst- what did he even do-

"I still don't know what i did to deserve you." Keith hummed and looked at him, opening his arms with what he now knew -after so much time together- was an invitation to cuddle and kiss and hug, share caresses with one another until they succumbed to asleep.

"Don't be silly, you're you, and that's more than enough for me." Lance slowly crawled on the bed and wiggled around until he was between Keith's arms, enjoying the way he held him, tight without being suffocating, tender but firm.

"You're too good to me." He whispered.

"Just the right amount." Keith answered, cradling Lance closer and humming a song under his breath, a long forgotten lullaby that his mother used to sing for him. Between that and the sound of his heartbeat, Lance was out within seconds, feeling his stress and guilt ebb away, being replaced by joy and delight instead.

The next morning, when they both woke, he ate the small cake that Keith had bought, all the while with his boyfriend smiling tenderly at him from the counter.

It tasted sweet.

But Keith was sweeter.

And he would chose him over dessert anytime.

Grocery store baker is back at it again, this time with a rather lengthy fuck managers. My department got a new manager about a month ago and I went from loving my job to hating it in that timeframe and honestly?? After today I've had Enough™ and need to rant about this under qualified mess of a man. My last manager, K, was a saint. She was experienced, qualified, stood up for her employees, made a schedule that accommodated everyone's availability, knew how to make a schedule, knew all the little semi-screwy parts of the company and how to avoid them, made sure everyone got their breaks, busted her ass for the department, got the orders in on time, was on top of the orders, was a great person to work with and a great person overall. She's the manager dreams are made of. This new bozo, S, is the exact opposite. He's been with the company for 3 months ((I've been with the company for 5 months, for reference)) and doesn't know jack. He's never been a manager before and only has about a year of assistant manager experience. He's got a heart problem which is exasperated by stress ((ya know, that thing that goes hand in hand with being a manager in a retail or food establishment???)) and is constantly calling out and fucking us all over because of it. The assistant manager, C, has been doing this for the past 10 years so she's been picking up the slack. However, she keeps having to leave early on Saturdays - whether S is there or not - because she ends up going waay over 40 hours and the store manager tosses her out ((the district manager is super strict about overtime and so far we're the only store in his district that has no overtime and isn't on the shit list)). So, besides fucking us over when he isn't there, he fucks us over by showing up as well. There's just such a variety of ways that he fucks us over while there that I'm gonna break it up. First off, besides S, the department is all women. S is 6 ft tall. Save for the decorator, Y - whose pregnant - I'm the tallest at just over 5'5. Most of our products are stored in our freezer until they're needed and all of our extra containers are stored in the fridge ((to hide them from food service but that's another story)). We try to keep things where we can reach them and try not to stack shit on the top shelf. S, however, decided, in this department of short people, to stack boxes 3-4 boxes high on the top shelf. Heavy stuff too like pies and frozen bread ((as opposed to light shit like cake donuts)). ((Ironically this month's safety focus is lifting and bending safely.)) So most of our closers - who need to get this shit - can't reach it and end up knocking things over and getting hurt. Has his employees getting hurt and asking for changes done anything?? Nope! It's still super unsafe! 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻 My store is brand new. It was built from the ground up and opened last November with brand new appliances, trays, racks, etc. The store S is coming from is the oldest store in the district where the oven's internal thermometer isn't properly calibrated and all the trays have an inch of carbon buildup. So, naturally, the two stores are run a little differently. He hasn't even tried to learn how this store works he's expected that the things he learned to work around the older store's quirks will work perfectly here. So far he's ruined 6 muffin tins, and roughly $400 worth of bread ((he baked no bake bread at 400 degrees for 20 minutes it was rock hard I wanted to c r y)). Plus we have a new girl!!! So he's teaching her all this bad habits!!! And C has to go behind his back to teach her properly so T ((the other baker)) and I don't have a cow in the morning. The kicker is that we're super open about the quirks of the oven and proofed like even the people who don't use them know them. ((The top shelf of a rack won't bake in either oven and the proofer seal was never installed properly and it doesn't seal right so the proofer is like 5 degrees cooler and 10% less humid than it should be.)) S cannot make a functional schedule. He just doesn't make one. He's physically incapable of staffing the department. ((Part of the problem is that we're understaffed because 3 people quit and we never replaced them and 1 person is absolutely shit at her job and can't do a single thing right but that's another story.)) I'm the part time baker and T is the full time baker but you'd never be able to tell because I end up baking more than T. T wasn't initially trained as a decorator but now she decorates more than she bakes. I'm also trained as an opener and a midday shift clerk. I've got no issue working those shifts. I haven't worked as a clerk since December. In order to serve customers, get products packaged and on the sales floor, and basically function properly, the department needs a clerk at all times. There should be one who opens, one who works in the middle of the day, and one ((it should be two but we're so understaffed)) who closes. This allows the clerk to man the register, package what the baker's made/is making, and get product on the floor in a timely manner. It allows the decorator to focus on making cake orders, filling the cake case, and serving customers at the cake case. It allows the baker to focus on making all the mixes needed to stock the department. It allows the managers to take inventory, place orders, and put the product that we don't bake here on the floor. The clerk is necessary for optimal bakery functionality. Do we always have one? Nope. We have someone from 6-11 and one from 4-9. We need someone working from 11-4 or 5 to fill that 5 hour gap. What ends up happening is the clerk leaves, the baker is up to her elbows in mix, the decorator is in the freezer/fridge getting things she needs, the manager is in the back getting a load, and a customer is getting angry at a counter because no one is there to take care of them. The closer ends up having the package shit that should have been packaged and on the floor before 4 in addition to panning everything for tomorrow, packaging everything in the self-serve case, cleaning the department, and facing the sales floor. When the closer has to do the midday shift's job as well as their own job ((which takes 2 people as is, so basically they're doing the work of 3 people on their own)), things get missed. Especially when C gets sent home for working too many hours and S called out ((or didn't and just didn't show up)). Every damn day we end up several hours behind schedule because there's no one there in the middle of the day packaging and I want to s c r e a m. Technically, we have 4 closers. Except one girl cannot close alone because she's slower than molasses and cannot do her job at all. Someone has to close with her to make sure that everything gets done and that she doesn't fuck up the one (1) thing she'll end up doing. R is a disaster ((she was hired at the same time I was and she only gets 4 hours a week because she's such a burden for the department)). The other closers - E, N, and G ((the new girl)) - hate working with her because it's actually more work than working alone. E is our best closer - she deep-cleans the whole department, packages at the speed of light, and pans everything properly. N is good - not as fast, but very thorough. G is new but she's getting the hang of it. N is being trained to decorate and they're trying to get E to open more ((even though she's only given 19 hours a week because S doesn't like her)). Closing is a 2 person job. We desperately need more clerks we suffer every day. Fun fact: I'm quitting at the end of April because on May 9th I start at the Culinary Institute of America. I'm so excited and I talk about it constantly. I've got a countdown going, I wear my CIA hoodie when I'm on break, I use my CIA pen for everything, I talk about it constantly, and it's been a known fact since I started when I'd be quitting. Literally every single person in the department - and most of the employees in other departments - know this because I never shut up about it. Partly because I'm super fucking pumped and partly because I want it to be crystal clear when I'm leaving so no one can act shocked when I turn in my two weeks. Back in January K was talking about who would be trained to replace me. S, however, has made no such comments and is training another decorator instead. Like, there's already 3 people in the department who are trained as a decorator we don't need a 4th we literally only have 10 employees in the department. There have been no moves to hire anyone ((the new girl was actually a cashier who wanted to transfer departments)) and no talk of training someone to replace me. C and T are getting nervous because they're scared that when I quit they won't be ready for it and C will have to bake as well as decorate and, ya know, manage the department. The only saving grave is that everyone in the department- while we don't get along because girls are super fuckin catty - is united in hating S. Like even C is sick of his shit. We all collectively shittalk him to let off steam so we don't blow a fuse whenever he does something particularly stupid. We're super catty and don't get along typically but S has really united us by making us hate him lmao. Tl;dr: My dream manager got transferred and an under qualified man was promoted to fill her shoes and is fucking up in every way imaginable. I went from loving my job to hating in the span of a month because of him.

passport photo got rejected AGAIN 

/flips a table