#i have an addiction and am currently on saw 5
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tag 9 people you want to get to know better
tagged by @puddleglumms akdjwjdj I'm so honoured!!
three ships: off the top of my head? Jude and Cardan from The Folk of the Air trilogy, Mr Gu and Yeom Mijeong from My Liberation Notes, and uhhh Anya and Dmitry from Anastasia
last song: Promise by Jimin 🥹🥹🫶🏻🫶🏻 it's been 84 years but we FINALLY have it on Spotify!!!! We won!!!
last movie: just finished watching Chicago (2003) with my sister for the first time and I actually really enjoyed it!!
currently reading: just started Hell Bent by Leigh Bardugo, and I SAY I'm rereading Les Miserables by Victor Hugo but I haven't touched it in like 2 months lol
currently watching: oh boy. Ummm Call It Love, Girl From Nowhere, and W Two Worlds for Asian dramas; Daisy Jones and the Six; and Bungo Stray Dogs, Yuri on Ice, and I guess I need to start the final season of Attack on Titan for Anime
currently consuming: I just finished a glass of chocolate milk and snacking on a bowl of nuts
currently craving: any food tbh. Our dinner is almost ready I'm just ready to eat
tagging @thebirdandhersong @thecoolestfreakyouknow @cordiallyfuturedwight @wellmanneredthief
#tag games#I KNOW my currently watching looks bad#in all honesty girl from nowhere and w I'm just watching an episode here and there#though I would like to get binging a drama soon I miss it. thinking of maybe starting save me?#I mean it's got ok taecyeon and seo yeji and that bodyguard dude from eternal monarch? sign me up#also it's like a culty thriller like I think the plot would be addicting#idk why w is taking me so slow like it's not a bad drama#it just has the tone and humour that the 2016 dramas have#which are all fine and good and classics but I'm not always in the mood for them#and girl from nowhere is. a lot so I can only watch like one episode here and there#I actually need to catch up on daisy jones cause I'm only halfway through episode 2#but I am liking it!#and technically I'm watching like 10 anime atm#cause I never ended up watching season 2 of spy x family (though I do plan to at some point)#and I started haikyuu a while back but I'll restart it after I'm done bungo stray dogs#and I need to finish Yuri on ice I've only got like 5 episodes left even though I haven't watched for weeks#(also I never talked about call it love. skdjsjdb it's really good so far I love a good melodrama)#(even though the pink filter is highly annoying)#and listen I have SO MANY ships that I like it's just that as soon as I saw that question every single ship I love flew out the window#but like mr gu and yeom mijeong will ALWAYS be that couple.#you just had to be there when mlb was airing. the girlies were going ~feral~#and with good reason!! nothing ever goes hard as 'worship me'#and jude and cardan my problematic loves 🫶🏻 they do so much damage ugh they just *chefs kiss*#and anya and dmitry cause I just saw anastasia <3 they have my whole heart#promise by jimin being on Spotify 🥹🥹🫶🏻🫶🏻 I've always been giving!!! but now I get to receive!!!!#genuinely that song is <3 <3#*ahem* now humbly asking for winter bear and my you#could continue talking but yeah! thanks for the tag! (if you've made it this far)
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THE RAY MEW FRIENDSHIP - EP 5
This is a dying friendship at the moment. Ray feels so much for mew - friendship, love, and so much gratitute. And it's so interesting how long and how much ray has held on to their past, because their current friendship actually feels like a shadow of what it once was.
Knowing what we now know about ray calling himself a burden and how far down that lack of self worth actually took him, i am now thinking about the scenes in ep 1 when we saw boston call him a burden, ray call himself a burden and mew say and do nothing about it. Ray looked so grateful to mew when mew just asked boston to take him home.
Mew is sort of giving the bare minimum (maybe not even that) to this relationship right now. I think mew has actually developed some resentment towards ray. It could be the responsibility of having to take care of someone with an addiction, or knowing how ray feels about him and not wanting that level of adoration, affection, dependence from ray or some combination of the two. But mew looks most animated while talking to ray when he is trying to get him to get together with sand. Maybe an underlying wish to have ray's overwhelming emotions focused on someone else and then they would stop being his problem.
It's also heartbreaking how much mew does not stand up for ray or for their friendship. We see that he can and does stand up to top when he wants to. But every time top disparages ray, or makes comments about their friendship that are definitely none of his business, mew says nothing.
And on a side note, when top told mew about using drugs, he panicked at the idea top being anything like ray.
And while his instincts and desire to set boundaries with ray are very very fair, he does often come across as cold. Even when ray had a genuine question about mew's relationship with top, he shut him off (though i also see that as him being defensive about his relationship since he knows there's something not quite right about it).
Also, reminder that one of mew's first items on the checklist of his perfect boyfriend was that he gets along with his friends. But top and ray clearly don't get along, and that doesn't seem to matter to mew.
Which is why, next episode, based on the preview, when the topboston drama is revealed (by ray), i think mew is going to feel that much more comfortable throwing away this real, but flawed and exhausting relationship with ray in favour of the facade of perfection with top.
I am so interested in seeing how this gets worse before it gets better... if there is a better. Which i do hope, since i still think there is some genuine affection there from both of them.
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The Magnus Archives 1 Angler Fish Liveblog
I have two deep confessions to lay bare here, on this public Tumblr.
1. I didn't like Waiting To Exhale and I think it is a bad movie.
2. I have never listened to The Magnus Archives which is a cardinal sin for me as a person who makes audio dramas. I plan to rectify this here and now! I want to listen to a lot more the seminal audiodramas so I can be a better student of my craft, and by blogging it I'm likely to get other people's input and thoughts which is also super helpful to me as an artist. So, see? Win win.
You can read my liveblogging thoughts below the cut.
00:00- I think the same thing when I listen to WTNV (which is like One Piece in my opinion) but it's also so, not necessarily strange, but particular when shows that you know didn't have ads initially have ads now. It's sort of like being a post-witness to growth. It'd be like finding Egyptian influence on Kush Artifacts. You just know that it looked different and that there had to be such a seismic shift to get to the change you know must have happened, because it doesn't make sense for it to have started in the state that you are currently experiencing.
04:10- Oh! It's one of the "we have a reason we're recording" shows! Those are fun.
04:39- It's nice to have a voice to go with all the Johnathan Sims fanart I've seen.
05:15- I will say when I was living out in LA for a couple of months in college, I did try listening to TMA but I didn't get into it. So, I do vaguely remember this 1st episode plot though that was about 5 years ago (which is crazy to think! Darn you COVID!)
06:40- Well God forbid Martin has some struggles. Please Johnathan where's your compassion?
09:16- I'm glad he knows I am but an American who knows nothing of Edinburgh.
12:18 Johnathan please. You can't just stare at people on the street. What happened to manners.
13:05- Give the man a bum, John. It's the sporting thing to do! Who cares if he's a little different. We all have our addictions.
14:59 Wait! John is reading a case this isn't his behavior. Oh, for shame. I have been slandering his good name. Sorry, Johnathan.
17:20- I'll be honest if I saw some truly bizarre phenomena that just screamed unexplained horror I would not investigate. There is already too much truly horrifying phenom that's hard to explain. I don't need to pursue the horrors. I'm a Black American, the horrors pursue me.
18:58 It's a shame audio dramas typically don't have characters with thick accented brogues. Could you imagine someone with a thick backwoods Irish or Scottish accent doing this. Think of the texture it would ad.
19:00- I know that all of these stories eventually connect so I'm excited to see how they all blend into a cohesive plot.
That's that on that. I'll keep doing these because I want to and I also think it'll be fun to, once I finish TMA, be able to go back and read through and relive the experience.
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Summarizing the shit I've been ranting about to my buffy freaks this week re: "you arent the source of me"
only spoiling things through s5e12 because i havent watched anything past that
Giles on vampires: "You aren't looking at your friend, you're looking at the thing that killed him"
Let's think about vampires thematically.
They are stuck in time, as noted by Buffy. They dress like the era they died in.
They are demons inhabiting the bodies of man.
They are made when a person sucks off another vampire (sorry).
Obviously we see vampires used metaphorically for pretty much every vice. Vampires as heroin use, vampires as sex workers, vampires as peer pressure, if humans do something unsavory, the show presents the vampires as that thing in an episode.
"You aren't looking at your friend, you are looking at the thing that killed him." You are seeing a vampire continue doing the things that led to them dying as a person. Extending that, imagine seeing someone you know still engaging in a fatal vice (like drugs), you don't see them as your friend anymore. You see a walking reminder that your friend is lost to drugs. It puts Riley in an interesting situation of 'going' but not 'being gone' to his vice. Buffy is already seeing him as 'the thing that is killing him' and she's arguing with herself on if she can pull him back out. Riley turns to the army. Either way, he needed structure OR someone to be with him (to like, keep him accountable), two options people typically need IRL for overcoming addiction. He picked structure.
Buffy expresses to Angel that when he kisses her, sometimes she wants to die. What if I want to lock myself in my current state forever, the state where we are together and I love you. Angel doesn't want this because he overcame his vices and he doesn't want Buffy to go through that awful shit. He also gives us a story of relapsing and how, with the help of a found family, he came back out of it.
So what is the opposite of a vampire? The Slayer. And it's the same thing. Buffy is always trying to use structure and friends to Not Be Stuck in the downward spiral of Slayerdom. It's her whole story arc since season 1. When people look at buffy, many see A Killer. She kills things. "But it isn't like that. I don't kill, I slay. I do it to protect and I don't enjoy it." But Buffy is always walking that line, isn't she. Her lowest moments usually deal with that balance, grappling with losing control or her own mortality. This is why Faith is so compelling. Faith is everything Buffy fears.
"I have no speech. No name. I live in the action of death. The blood-cry, the penetrating wound. I am destruction. Absolute. Alone."
"The Slayer."
The action of death, the thing that kills. The Drugs, the Sex, the Violence. The Vices, and for Buffy, the Slaying. Faith paints slaying as this romp, this thrill that is sexual, empowering, and fun. Buffy fears Slaying. Buffy looks at all of her friends and sees them as victims to her fate. They will die because of her. Because she can't control her Slayer because... it kind of is fun. She does get that thrill. Season 5 starts with her restlessly leaving in the night to engage in that cheap thrill aspect of it. Much like riley leaves in the night to get sucked off (sorry, it's just so fun to say)
She says: "You have to get over the primal power thing. You are not the source of me." and she returns to her friends. She is accepting that she can find the balance. She has the structure and the support network. She has everything she needs to prevent herself from Becoming What Kills Her. Her friends don't look at her as The Slayer. They look at her as their dear friend, daughter, lover, confidant, silly rabbit. She is more than the Slayer to Giles, to Willow, to Xander. She's becoming more to Tara and Anya and--most importantly, now--Spike (the freak obsessed specifically with Killing Slayers).
She just went through this arc with Dawn. She looked at Dawn and saw the key but then saw how that made her own self violent towards *her sister.* She doesn't see Dawn as the key, as the thing that will kill* her, that's my fucking baby sister
*kill as in "this is your fate" Buffy won't let it be her fate
I still need to like. structure this and solidify the themes but you see what I'm working toward, kind of. All this talk of Sources. What is someone's source. Is it the vices they engage in? Is a drug addict simply a drug addict or are they a member of a community who is struggling without support?
My favorite trait that Buffy shows is Seeing the Humanity in creatures. It isn't ever explicitly addressed but it shows up through the whole show. She adopts demons, she stops before decapitating Angel, she almost stops Faith from committing misandry, she senses something up with Ted and Kathy, she can't bring herself to kill Spike. She sees Dawn AS HER LITTLE SISTER (the hair stroking is already killing me). And we saw her struggle with guilt when faced with Riley's suck-girl (and she caves in to her emotions and kills her anyway). We've been getting more scenes where she either feels bad about killing some vamps or people make her feel bad about it. "Buffy, you are better than this. You aren't just a slayer who goes around and slays vamps indiscriminately. You are not The Slayer. You are Buffy.
Right now, it is happening again. Buffy doesn't see her mom. She sees a walking brain tumor. "You aren't looking at your [mom], you are looking at the thing that['s killing her]." She is looking at her mom the way she looks at vampires and that is what causes her to go into this slayer mode. Why she gets antsy and has to "go do something, I can't sit and do nothing" because the problem is so similar to vampires. The core conceit of the slayer: she sees the killer, not the person being killed. And she can't slay this one, it's in her mom. She can't look at her mom without it activating that instinct and it's driving her insane.
Fucking Harmony, man. she's the It Girl social influencer and who is she? What is the 'thing that is killing her?' That. She's basically exactly the same as a vampire. whac you see is what you get.
Cordelia survived. She became more than an It Girl. She developed friends and relationships and even though they fell apart, she was able to find a place to be and a reason to live outside of the one aspect of herself: being popular.
Harmony never got over that, she didn't find something to bring her out of that role.
This expands out to the whole show as it exists in the medium of TV. All these characters are classic archetypes and it is when they transcend those roles that they "Survive."
Look at spike. One off weirdo bad guy who is the season 2 miniboss and dies. Except he doesn't. He transcends that and DOESN'T GET KILLED OFF because James Marsters developed relationships and exerted himself. And Spike has become so much more than the slayer killer. He is alive because he found his source: being a weird fucked up little freak
People look at Tara and she see "Willow's lesbian" but it isn't until Tara causes a problem and exposes her family bullshit that they see beyond the role they ascribed to her, the role Tara herself was feeling trapped by. They are seeing Tara, not Willow's Girlfriend, also why we have the spell being about sight and not seeing demons. Buffy still has yet to *see* Spike.
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i actually miss you so much here🧎🏻♀️
oh honey bee 🥺🤍 i miss you too 😭 thank you all soo much for all the wonderful messages everyone has sent in — there are so many of them, and i have read every single one and cried a little 🤧 i am so sorry that i don’t have the time to respond in detail to each one, but i am so so grateful and touched for all of them, and truly thank you for thinking of me 🌼 i hope you all have been doing well, and life has been treating you kindly 💛💛 it feels like coming home for the holidays after being away for so long 🥹
i finally logged back in today (after needing to reset the pw for this and for the email this blog is linked to oof) but i’m so out of the loop for kpop aside from shinee, bp, and taeyeon 🤧 i heard from alice that nct dream is touring !! 💘 i hope all of you were able to get tickets and i will live vicariously through you :’) and also hbd to renjun today !!!
a life update from me — i’ve been having the time of my life (minus some burnout from work but we won’t talk about that because it still pays the bills very well and then some), and i have long trips to japan with my friend and to australia to visit ti and steph coming up 💕 i have a fun work trip and a keshi concert with my friends including moon next month !! and i have two music festivals lined up for the summer already !!! dpr is coming to hitc nyc and i’m so sad that i’ll be out of the country when it happens but fingers crossed they come for the LA one ! and my friend just texted me a couple days ago about another music festival she randomly got tickets to so vegas here we gooo 🥳 and possibly a second vegas trip too that my other friend brought up today ??? also the usual weekend trips to LA, of course 🤩 omg and i saw jisoo irl up close at their concert and she is beautiful, and i can’t wait for her solo 🥹🫶🏻🫶🏻 and i’m currently blonde 🤧 my hair is really going through it like i first dyed it all lavender, then silver, then blonde, then i chopped it mid length and dyed it pink, then pastel pink, now it’s blonde, and it’ll be rose gold in two weeks !!! also i made like $5k from my investments and stocks, and i’m so incredibly proud of myself even though i know it’s not much compared to others :’) and i bought a chanel bag to celebrate my career milestone when i was promoted last year and got a big raise and bonus !!!! 🥳 i found the one i wanted after checking shops over the span of five months in like 8 cities and 5 countries djjdjkskd OH and i still hang out with els and she is still very much in l*ve with taeyong and jaehyun 💞 also blind boxes, specifically sanrio ones, have taken a chokehold on me thanks to els, and i’m still playing genshin so gacha addiction go brrr
tldr ; i’m really happy and content with where i’m at, and i sincerely hope from the bottom of my heart that every single one of you is experiencing the same amount, if not, even more, of happiness in your lives, honey bees 🤍🐝✨ as always, i’m sending you all my love and well wishes, ily all so so much 🌷🌷
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Hi
I am new to your blog. Can I say that I absolutely love your work! Your blog is like the perfect blend of fluff, wholesome, angst and horny (pls don’t hate on me for the last one but I just love the way how you write smut). You are so talented and your work is so immersive.
I also love how you are unabashed about being a fangirl and posting the self ship arts that you commission. I love seeing them. I am currently in university and I am barely scraping by for rent and living but someday I also want to get self ship arts with my favs 😩
I also love Diluc a lot. He was the first 5 star I got (in my first 20 wishes. I was so lucky. I got him before he even appeared in my story haha). The minute I saw him, I fell in love with him. And after getting to know him, I fell harder (lol look at me talk about him like he is real life man hihihi). Anyways I have this theory that Diluc’s love language is acts of service. I believe this because of his character. He loves his nation and he served it in any way he can - first as a Knight and now as a vigilante. He is not very obvious about it. I have a feeling that sometimes he knows about Kaeya’s missions and he intervenes in a covert fashion if the mission is too dangerous. Kaeya knows but Kaeya will not point it out because he doesn’t want Diluc to become skittish.
And it’s the same with you as well. When he initially starts dating you, it starts of small. You don’t even notice it. When he is at your doorstep, about to knock, he notices that your doorknob is loose. That’s dangerous so after dropping you back, he will fix it in the middle of the night as he guards Mondstadt. Or how when you cook dinner for him, he will insist on cleaning up but not just that, he’ll meticulously put things back in order and make a mental note of the supplies that need to be replenished. Or when you go out on a chilly night, he knows that your cardigan isn’t sufficient to keep you warm and his coat is too heavy and bulky for you to walk around in so he always carries a nice, warm scarf and gloves (that matches his) in the pocket of his jacket.
You eventually start to notice it when he becomes a constant presence in your life. He often stays over at your place instead of the tavern now. All your stationary supplies never seem to run out. You could have sworn that you were running out of shampoo but now there was a brand new bottle in the bathroom. On nights that you took longer to arrive home, if he was in Mondstadt and not on a mission, he’d prepare a nice warm meal for you. He will massage your shoulders and remark how stiff they are because you overwork (look in the mirror, Diluc). Even in days when he has missions, he quietly enters your home while you are asleep, and notices how your duvet is slipping off your frame. He will gently drape it around you, he cannot wait to be in bed with you and share your warmth. So he will take a quick shower and slowly slip into the bed with you. You always wake up earlier than he does because you have to work. You leave him to sleep (obviously after kissing him on his cheek or forehead) wishing you could stay with him but duty calls. He wakes up to find you gone. Although he has a busy day, he will check if any chores in your house needs to be done. He will clean the dishes that you left after breakfast and clean the house. He finally will make the bed and leave you a note with cute messages. He always will sign it with an intricate D
ANON PLEASE I AM CRYING OVER EVERY SINGLE BIT OF THIS (happy tears ofc)
thank you so much for your kind & thoughtful words & for reading my writing 🥺🩷 it means so much to me🩷🩷 i could never hate another smut lover hehe
ahhh these men got me good i don’t know how to not fan girl like mad plus i am addicted to getting self ship arts done (my wallet not so much either lolol) but i am glad you enjoy it, I love seeing people gush about their favs too it’s the best & just so wholesome & sweet🥰💕
ooo lucky baby! that’s so awesome he was your first 5 star!🥰❤️ it took like 2 years before he came home to me fjfkfkfk but i totally feel falling in love with him from first sight - dreamy longing sigh heh AND EVEN MORE SO AFTER WHAT YOU WROTE AHHH 😭😭🩷 YES 1000% AGREE WITH ALL OF THIS! he’s so thoughtful & sweet & he really does show that in the ways he looks after you🩷 watching over his brother too fjdkfkfk !!!! YOU ARE AFTER MY HEART ARENT YOU
WHY IS HE SO PERFECT 🥺😭❤️
#I cannot live without the ragbros#thank you so much for taking the time to send this!❤️❤️#it makes me smile so very much 🥰🩷#🌙asks
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Hi! Could I get a creepypasta match up please!
I am 5 foot...not very blessed in the height department unfortunately, I'm slim but well endowed in both upper and lower departments. I'm fairly light for being Hispanic (i don't go outside in the sun often) I have shoulder length hair, its currently red and has been red for a hot minute, but in the past it used to be shorter and a different color every other week. Like for two weeks I could have purple hair then BOOM it's yellow now. I have 21 piercings. I have two in the center of my eyebrows, two nostril piercings. One on each side, a septum. And snake bites. I used to have My bridge pierced but I took it out bc it was in the process of migrating:/m I have 26 tattoos. IT SOUNDS LIKE A LOT. But it's not..THAT many when you actually get a good look at my full body. Most of them are on my thighs, I have some on my back, I have chest tattoos and a wrist tattoo. All my tattoos are either witchy, satanic, or of pretty pin up women and fruit.
Personality wise. I'm not sure, I have adhd, autism and bpd. I can be loud and excitable but also REALLY quite, aloof and awkward. I am a very passionate person and I'm always doing something (or at least trying to) I love to learn new things, I love to talk, I love to listen but I also love to just sit in absolute silence sometimes. I hate the sound of people sneezing, idk why it just REALLY upsets me. I can be really nice and helpful but I don't like being taken advantage of. I don't like confrontation but I will stand up for myself and or my friends if it's truly necessary. I am very giving, if someone I care about was in need I wouldn't mind giving them the shirt off my back or the shoes I'm wearing...it's happened before too. I also love shopping. I may have a slight....shopping addiction. I also have a very strong sense of justice and respect, so you won't catch me doing anyone dirty, but I won't let anyone do me dirty and ill cut them off if they keep crossing the line. I'm very good at sniffing out snakes. And I try to warn people around me about fake people and they never believe me until shit hits the fan, and then they sit there like ":0 I didn't know" TF YOU MEAN YOU DIDNT KNOW I TOLD YOU!?
I have daddy issues and don't have a stable father figure in my life 🧍🏻♂️ I love my mom though, shes cool
Style wise. I'm a bit all over the place, I've been in the alternate community since I was born. My dad was a metal head soo it kind of passed. But not really. Mental only stuck for so long. I tried scene, not my personal style but I loved the music. I was in the emo scene for a good couple of years until i started to hang out with the punk kids in my highscool, they were a little to much for me, activity wise though so it didn't last to long. But I found my home in the goth subculture and then from that point on, I explored the subcultures within that subculture. I tried nu goth, pastel goth, gothic lolita, trad goth. And none of them felt right, until I found gothabilly. And I find myself most comfortable in thag vintage style and the pin up style. My favorite brand (just so you can get an idea) is vixen by micheline pitt. My closet is just PURE black. With hints of black and white stripes and red.
I have many hobbies. I used to do tattoos on myself and my friends. I tried to get into piercing....it was a little too scary for me. I know how to make jewelry, I know how to paint, and draw. I know how to write, I love reading. I get too far down weird and obscure rabbit holes. I'm learning how to sew and I love it. I have a huge passion for fashion. And I want to start My brand one day. Even if it's small and for a niche group. I love to game, I love horror games especially, Outast is one of my favorite game series. I love horror period. Horror stories, movies, books. I love collecting specimens, like pinned bugs or mice in Jars. I have a small jar of bones. I love the dead. My favorite horror movie is either Saw or Scream. I also love watching indie disturbing horror movies as well. I'm a practicing witch, and I often use pendulums to communicate with. There was an old ghost of a woman who used to live in my apartment. She was cool sometimes but she messed with the doors and lights to much. I also used to collect dolls, specifically monster high dolls, but I wanted to branch out to haunted dolls...but then I thought mayybe that wouldn't be a good idea. I also love to cook and bake, and i love trying new food. I am also learning how to roller skate.
I don't like spiders though, which is ironic because I love spider web design and embroidery on my clothing. They just...look...ugly in. And their faces freak me out. I can't stand bad smells. I have a very very strong sense of taste and smell so I can be pretty sensitive around food and with bad odors. I don't like being woken up when I'm sleeping and I don't like being around loud obnoxious people.
Just for reference, I am afab nonbinary but present feminine to androgynous. I like both dudes and women and other NB people. My favorite creepypastas used to be Eyeless Jack, Bloody Painter, Jason the Toy Maker, the doll maker and the Puppeteer. I mean I liked ALL the pastas but they were my particular favorites
this feels so short in comparison to all that you sent me and i'm deeply sorry for that.
your matchup is... clockwork!
natalie is a very simple person, believe it or not. she's fairly blunt and isn't the type to bullshit a person so you don't have to worry about her taking advantage of you and your kindness. she's also really good at spotting snakes, so honestly you two could be a snake-sniffing duo and point out all the people you should avoid and whatnot.
she's an incredibly honest person as well and the type to never beat around the bush so if she wants to say something, she will say it.
she's a fairly emotionally reserved person so she doesn't wear her heart on her sleeve but when it's just the two of you, she lets her walls down a bit and she allows herself to relax a little.
she's more of a listener than a talker so she'll sit there and listen to you talk for hours. she doesn't mind sitting in silence either, because with you it's rather comfortable. but on the very rare occasion that she's the one doing all the talking, she'll definitely appreciate the fact that you're listening. it makes her feel seen in ways she could never describe.
natalie thinks you look good with any hair color, to be honest. i think in the beginning she was definitely a bit caught off guard by your spontaneous hair color changes but she gets used to it rather easily because it's just another part of you that she's fond of. she is just a bit concerned about your hair potentially getting damaged if you dye it too often but... she's not a hair expert, so. and honestly, she's thought about dying her hair as well, so. maybe you can recommend a color for her!
she also thinks you look wicked cool with your piercings and tattoos by the way. and she would absolutely love to hear about the meanings of your tattoos if any of them have one that you're willing to share with her.
she may not look like it, but natalie is pretty interested in fashion! she doesn't dabble in many styles herself because of various reasons but she is very interested in all of your own styles ranging from any goth and punk clothing you may own to the vintage and pin-up style you currently have going on.
if you asked natalie what her hobbies were she would probably just shrug and say, 'don't have any.' but trust me when i tell you that she does. she is so very much interested in deep diving into obscure topics and going down rabbit holes that she probably shouldn't go down because she loves learning about all the weird things buried underneath, hidden away from the average person.
honestly, you guys could probably make a date night out of deep diving into two separate topics and telling each other about it as you go. seems like it would be a pretty fun thing to do.
natalie doesn't particularly pay much attention to video games but she isn't against playing one or two if you recommend it to her! she's pretty invested in the things that you like, so she'll definitely play anything you recommend.
as for horror movies, natalie also probably doesn't give them much thought but trust me when i say she is a big fan of the saw franchise. i can see it now, you sitting her down to watch the saw movies and her just getting absolutely hooked and totally developing a crush on amanda young because honestly who doesn't. after the saw franchise, she's definitely more interested in horror than she was before and she'll probably sit down in her own time to watch some other movies just to talk about them to you.
always down to have her hair and nails done by you if you want to do them. she'll pay you as well, don't worry, just like... don't ask where she got the money because that would lead to a really awkward conversation probably. and she's also rooting for you to get into college to study fashion design!
so yeah anyways you guys would be a cute couple together and you'd have two cats and a rabbit named pumpkin or something and yeah.
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And finally, to complete my yearly game posts, here's what I plan on playing in the year 2024:
1. Assemble With Care - a short little game I should be able to knock out in a few hours but I picked it up in a bundle and I have wanted to play it so I will try to knock it out this year.
2. I'm more than half way done with Baldur's Gate 3 but I likely will be playing it through January. I hope to finish it at least once before P3R.
3. Bloodborne - help.
4. Borderlands 2 - since I had such a blast playing Borderlands with my boyfriend this year, I'm looking forward to giving this game a second chance and hopefully enjoying it much more.
5. Borderlands 3 - a little less hopeful for this one, since I haven't heard much good about it, but might as well knock out the main franchise.
6. Boyfriend Dungeon - I just got this for Christmas and I'm excited for the concept of romancing my weapons :)
7. I'm also more than halfway through Catherine, so I also intend to finish that in the coming month.
8. Cat Museum - something cute and short I picked up on mega sale and want to make an effort to play this year.
9. The Coffin of Andy and Leyley - I actually have no idea what this game is about or if I'll like it but it was a gift so dammit I'll play it.
10. Dragon's Dogma 2 - Dragon's Dogma is easily in my top 10 games of all time, and I am SO hype for this game. The only downside is it's coming in March, and the first quarter of 2024 is pretty PACKED with games for me.
11. Etrian Odyssey - because I never finished it when I owned it on DS but I'm in my Atlus Games era rn so
12. Far: Lone Sails - I was drawn to this game for the art and it seems like a quick little experience of a game.
13. Final Fantasy 16 DLC - blanketing over the currently available DLC and the up and coming DLC.
14. Hades - a carry over from 2023's list but THIS WILL BE THE YEAR (maybe)
15. Haven - I don't think (?) this game is very long but it looks very heartwarming so I'm here for it this year.
16. Little Nightmares 2 - another fairly short game that I have no reason not to play, especially when I'm obsessed with the first one.
17. Little Nightmares 3 - I don't know what the release date is yet but like Borderlands let's try to close out a franchise!
18. Metaphor: ReFantazio - it doesn't even have a release date and I'm already excited about it.
21. Nier Automata - another carry over from 2023, but I have a good feeling about it this year.
19. NEO: The World Ends With You - I hear only good things about this game but I will be walking into it 98% blind.
20. Nightingale - Idk how much I'll actually play this game but my friend and I have been watching its development for years and we are READY
22. Nier Replicant - I watched a friend play some of this and it looked fun, and since I saw it was free on PS plus... why not.
23. Octopath Traveler - this is to feed my JRPG addiction but break up some of my Atlus obsession
24. Opus: Echo of Starsong - This was a gift like 2 years ago and I really want to play it through this year.
25. Persona 3 Reload - I ALREADY TOOK VACATION FOR IT IM SO READY 38 MORE DAYS
26. Persona 4 Arena - Because I think it's the only readily available Persona game I haven't played yet.
27. Sea of Stars - I'm more than half through this too, I stopped playing it to play Tactica so I'll be finishing this soon as well.
28. Shin Megami Tensei 3: Nocturne - I put a fair amount of time into it this year, and I adore this game. I'm finishing it next year.
29. Shin Megami Tensei 5 - for real this year, I promise (🤞)
31. Undertale - why have I not played this? Why did it sit on my list last year untouched? Why did I install it and never play it? The world may never know.
30. Soul Hackers 2 - because again, I'm in my Atlus Games era and I bought it this year so time to play it.
32. Untitled Goose Game - for casual hijinks
I'm even more ambitious this year than last year and thats without knowing even half of whats to be released in 2024 sooo wish me luck.
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What are your Top Five Ships of All Time that you can Scream (TM) about and why?
All time? Of All Time???? OOOOOH you are making me choose! This is tough, but an exciting ask! Thank you so much, friend!!! I will list them in reverse order, from number 5 to number 1!! (as always, this is just a list based on my current interests, and it could change in the future!)
5. Brawler/Hoodlum from Akudama Drive. Listen, listen. These two? They are in love. So clearly in love. Brawler is Constantly showing off for Hoodlum, and Hoodlum blushes??? When he's talking with Brawler???? Excuse me?????? I 10000% believe Brawler knew Hoodlum stretched the truth with his amount of years he owed the system, but he took One (1) look at Hoodlum's pretty eyes and went "yeah that's fine he's pretty I want to keep him around I will humour him" and that was IT. (I could also talk about the scene with the bridge but I WILL NOT for reasons😭😭😭 He's resting. Just resting.) This one comes out at number 5 because while I love it and could easily go on and on and on about it, I haven't talked about it as much or as often as the others on this list.
4. Mondo Oowaa/Kiyotaka Ishimaru from Danganronpa. These two. THESE. TWO. Ugh. I love them so much. Mondo is MY SON. He's just so...precious. And so is Taka. I love them both and I think their dynamic is very sweet. I think they are very similar to Brawler and Hoodlum in some ways, but obviously not exactly the same. I do love how they bonded over a mutual respect for each other that came from competition. I also will cry every time I watch Mondo's execution, and every time Taka ends up murdered. Pain. I live for the AU where they are both alive and healthy and able to fall in love and live happily ever after. This ship is at number four because I did settle down a lot after my initial playthrough of the game and while I can definitely scream about them at any given time if prompted, I don't search them out as actively as I used to in fanfiction or fanart.
3. Jade Leech/Floyd Leech/Azul Ashengrotto from Twisted Wonderland. This OT3 is honestly addicting to talk about for me. I love them. They're three of my favourite characters in the game, and I really find their dynamics fascinating. They have this incredible trust with each other, they know each other so well, and they support each other. Also I am *here* for the Mafia theme. Love that so so so much. Honestly, over the past few days I don't think I've shut up about them in our DMs and texts.
2. GrimmIchi from Bleach. Honestly, I had to give Grimmjow and Ichigo one of the top two spots. I mean, honestly, I'm one of the co-writers for a blog *dedicated* strictly to GrimmIchi (though I haven't written anything there in a long while...ooops). I have Many Many Many thoughts about them and I love to yell about them. It's very hard to get me to stop once you get me going, and it's so easy to get me going. Just ask @backwardshirt
Honourable Mentions: Byakuya/Kirigiri/Naegi from Danganronpa, Gundham/Souda from Danganronpa 2, Noiz/Aoba from DMMD, Vash/Wolfwood/Meryl from Trigun, Lawrence/Adam from Saw (2004), Byakuya/Renji from Bleach, Vil/Rook from Twisted Wonderland, Bokuto/Akaashi from Haikyuu!
1.Number one spot goes to:
Kalim/Idia from Twisted Wonderland. I mean. It's not hard to figure out, I'm sure, lol. I talk about them a lot, and I make a lot of posts about them. I love to discuss different dynamics, different possible aus, and I have written several one-shots and short scenes about them now, as well as a multi-chaptered fic centered around them as a pairing (and there will be more to come!!!). I love them and I will take any and all opportunities to shout about them. They are so cute; the introvert and the extrovert, the grumpy rain cloud and the sunshine beam. I love that dynamic with my entire soul. I can't help but be drawn to them. They got that Sun and Moon dynamic. Both of them have such complex emotions, and I think both of them struggle with conveying what they feel; just in totally different ways. I love them so much!!!!!!!!!!
#thank you so much for this ask friend!#hope you enjoyed these answers#akudama drive#bleach#twisted wonderland#danganronpa#top 5 ships#personal#for fun
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Misconceptions and stuff - MiseryXCPR again
Stuff I forgot to add to the post / Saw within it from what others have said.
1) Im still technically an amateur at commissions, I'm still learning how to do them effectively and efficiently, I'm still learning my style despite what everyone says about it, etc. I'm still ""new"" at commissions. I learned about a app called Trello, in which I have been looking into for future reference for commissions. Trello from my understanding helps organize a lot of things such as commissions due, person it belongs to, etc. I'm still looking into it but I'll definitely keep this in mind.
2) Terms of Services - I never had one. I'm still learning about commissions and taking them, I never had a TOS nor have I thought about it into too much because at first commissions were a- for fun type thing. Now, I do it as a part time job and I've been considering a Terms of Service but never got around to it - mostly due to how busy I am but also because I'm not familiar with learning how to do it.
3) I will be working on my memory after hearing amazing advise from people. Trello will most likely be my solution, or writing things down on a sheet of paper is what someone advised me I believe.. I will be working on it as best as I can and will actively try to improve off of the situation. Please keep in mind; I'm not trying to excuse myself nor am I trying to make excuses or create a "pity party". I wanted to clear things up to show i have no ill intentions and that I am deeply sorry for the inconveniences.
4) "Why did I take so many commissions" - I have addictions that I am now currently battling and trying to face, commissions was an extra income for me to either get rides or important necessities like food, a home, etc or to fuel my addictions or want to help my "friends" whom use me for my money. It wasn't healthy of me to do so much nor was it worth the stress, and I am again- actively trying to battle these addictions. I do also enjoy art and such, at first it was a thrill to do commissions - I've never felt so proud that I could do something with my art. However I went overboard with the commissions and it became a drag and something unenjoyble. This regards any robux commissions I have done that doesn't involve the top one - which is why I mostly do PayPal commissions.
5) More on Tansy, as I've been questioned about it and seen misinformation still going around. I have spoken to the person whom paid for them (will not involve them anymore due to their own request), and I've noticed that the commissioned they paid was 12$~ roughly. Which, is incorrect as I double checked and it was 8$ or 7,28$. I am still actively trying to give them back their money and solve the situation, and I do not wish for any ill intentions or harm towards anyone involved.
7) I'm French, so my apologies for horrible wording or such. While I have lived in the states, i still suck at English. I also lack a lot of empathy, I struggle with it and I'm trying hard to find ways to understand and sympathise with others. I still try to do so. While this subject is very personal to me, I feel like this should be addressed.
8) Thank you to those who have been supportive and helping me still, I'm trying to balance out my real life situation and this whole situation and I want to help clear the air and at least help put others at ease.
I have Full intentions on refunding a large amount of commissioners, and I already refunded many people as it is so I can "start over" once I deal with my real life situation. Thank you for all the advise, criticism and support, this will be my last message regarding the situation (if I need to clear up more information then please let me know)
Also, for those who have asked, I'm a male.
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tagged by @cytharat @fangrui thank you 💗💗
this is so hard 😅😅
10 Characters, 10 Fandoms, 10 Tags
Chu Wanning (The Husky and His White Cat Shizun) - I am amazed at just how much I love this character.
Tian (Atots) - Did my baby make bad choices regarding his health? Yes.
Porsche (KinnPorsche) - He is a baby and I miss him
Adachi (Cherry Magic) - It was like looking at myself and I cried the entire time.
Wen Kexing (Word of Honor) - He is my poor little mewow mewow
Nozue (Old Fashion Cupcake) - how do I explain! Nozue-san, you deserve everything.
General Choi Yeong (Faith) - he was a real life person however the drama was fictional. And he melted my heart everytime he called Eun Soo Imja so yeah.
Kyoko (Okitegami Kyoko no Biboroku) - My girl resets every time she goes to sleep. It was relief coated angst and I wish there were more.
Dongfang Qingcang (Cang Lan Jue) - Sometime the villain is the hero and I am so thankful that I got to see it.
Baek Nakyum (Painter of The Night) - 3 seasons of pain and suffering and it never gets easy. He deserves to be happy.
put your top 9 favourite characters!
Kwak Hyun (Hospital Ship) - this man said she can do what she wants, my feelings about who she meets is absolutely unnecessary. So yeah the male lead saying this almost 5/6 years ago in kdrama was very rare
Kurosawa (Cherry Magic) - he saw Adachi
Eun Soo (Faith)- Kudos to Eun Soo for navigating her Goreyo era time travel experience with greed and history knowledge to survive. And also cause she bagged one of the most decorated general in that era.
Bai Qian (Ten Miles of Peach Blossom) - while I do take issue with Susu, Bai Qian kicked everyone and their mother's ass. So she definitely deserves this
Dong Yi (Dong Yi) - She was real life person from history and the character in the drama was great
Kinn (KinnPorsche) - he is out, loud and proud. Anyone that questions him gets a bullet to their head. What’s not to love?
Mo Ran (The Husky and His White Cat Shizun) - Dress him up however you want, TXZ or Mo Ran. I want him for CWN.
Phupa (ATOTS) - this forest ranger said gay dudes also live in the wilderness but can they communicate? Nooooo
Zhou Zishu (Word of Honor) - He was ready to yeet himself from existence but then he met a dude.
people you want to get to know better
Last Song: Mean x Jeff Satur's new song
Currently Watching: so many dramas!
Currently Reading: SVSSS
Last series: Natsuzora. I love my daily jdramas a lot and they are so addictive!
Last movie: Alienoid
Favourite food: how do I categorize! I love food!
Favourite color: soft tones of all colors, idk how to describe it however my closet is filled with really bright colors 🤣🤣
Song stuck in my head: Over the Moon (The Eclipse OST)
Last thing you googled: Back pain exercise. ouchie
Time: 1 am
Dream trip: there is literally so many places!! But I would like a trip where I have plenty of time so I can actually see things or lazy about and do nothing instead of just whooshing through.
Last thing you read: The Husky and His White Cat Shizun
Last book you enjoyed reading: ☝️
Last book you hated reading: I rather not say
Favourite thing to cook/bake: the food!! I don't like all the cleaning after but I am an excellent cook and a better baker. I like the food I make most of the time lol
Favourite craft to do in your free time: drawing, gif making,
Most niche dislike: replying to email
Opinion on circuses: meh
Do you have any sense of direction? : Yes? At least I think I do.
content creator appreciation! list five favourite sets you’ve made and send this ask to five other content creators
I like trying new styles every now and then. I tried a new layout style recently.
This one is a fade effect, takes forever! I tried with 4x4 but my favorite ones are 3x3
This comic book overlay is another one. Maybe I will try this style again.
I am scared of color overlays, but this one turned out okay.
Ooooo this was cool effect overlay I tried.
Tagging a few people and anyone who would like to join @billlkin @moonlightchicken @vegastheerapanyakul @guzhu-furen @machikeita (feel free to ignore)
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Tag Game to Better Know You
@jmobiwanspadawan helloooo my friend thank you for the tag! Hope you’re doing well!!
(don’t mind everything being pink. My tumblr is being wonky and this is the only way I can see the text lol)
What book are you currently reading?
The Accidental Salesperson by Chris Lytle. Book about the philosophy of marketing, essentially, and how to not be a sleazy salesman lol.
What’s your favourite movie you saw in theatres this year?
MARIO. Ahhh it was fucking great. Absolutely adored it. I’ve also just seen Dungeons & Dragons which was very fun as well, and a documentary film called Addicted to Life which was fucking heart wrenching.
What do you usually wear?
At home, 95% it’s black joggers and probably one of my many baggy black shirts. Outside, usually some 70s style variation of dress pants, sweater, or some other shirt. I’ve been very into 70s style (less patterns though) lately, although I have to admit I only half know what that even is lol. I’m learning
How tall are you?
5’7”, which I believe is 171cm?
What’s your star sign?
Libra :)
4/5 of my immediate family members are libras
Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event?
I think Carrie Fisher and Kim Kardashian?
Do you go by your name or a nickname? Nickname, usually. My name is somewhat long and formal-ish, and I’ve never met anyone with the same name who doesn’t shorten it.
Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child?
I’m on my way!
Are you in a relationship? If not, who is your crush if you have one?
I was absolutely fucking SMITTEN with a guy in one of my classes a couple months ago. I mean, ‘making silly love song playlists, giggling at the thought of him, waking up early to do my hair, walking around with heart eyes and sighing wistfully’ kind of smitten, which was a first lmao
What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at?
I’m pretty damn good at baking and cooking EXCEPT FUCKING PANCAKES. I could not make you a pancake to save my life.
Dogs or cats?
Both.
If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favourite picture/favourite line/favourite etc. from something you created this year?
Ahh I’ve written a lot but I can’t think of any particular lines. This one is from a song I’m working on and I like it enough 🤷🏻♀️
Use me as your ashtray. I’ll catch all your withering pieces.
What’s something you’d like to create content for?
Girl don’t even get me started. Star Wars would be SICK, Marvel too. I’d also just really love to work on an ARG? Which like, I guess I could just DO, lol.
What’s something you’re currently obsessed with?
Well, if you hadn’t already guessed from the previous answer- Welcome Home. Fantastic ARG. Also The Mandalorian, she my side lover.
What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?
Ahaaa wellll I produced a commercial and I showed it to someone who means a lot to me and they had a really disappointing reaction. Turns out they actually loved it, but their first reaction was asking about something that I hadn’t included and it was pretty crushing at the time.
What’s a hidden talent of yours?
I can unicycle 🤷🏻♀️ that’s always my go to answer lol.
Are you religious?
I am! Im a non denominational Christian who is also left leaning and gay sooo currently I do not have a church 😂
What’s something you wish to have at this moment?
I REALLY could use a high quality super thin paintbrush. Like, for doing tiny details. And money lmao
Uhhh I’m never on here anymore so idk who’s active 😅 So please please feel free to do this if you want to! I’m tagging The World
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Tag some people you want to get to know better!
@gfawkesphoenixchokingonashes thanks for tagging me! 💖✨
here are my very much no pressure tags: @voylitscope @cable-knit-sweater @caffeinated-gh0st 💝
Three ships:
1. Stucky (MCU) - surprise huh because i am absolutely not blogging about them all day.
2. Griddlehark (The Locked Tomb) - it's about the raw devotion. one flesh, one end. get thee in line. almost like that's a theme here.
3. Dream x Corinthian (The Sandman). hear me out. major mess. probably unhealthy as all hell. does the corinthian's eyes have tongues? i choose to see the possibilities.
First Ship: that is a VERY good question. my exact teen timeline is a bit hazy. might be ByaRen (Bleach)? i don't remember being emotionally invested in FMA or Naruto ships, and i believe i read those before bleach. believe.
Last Song: Önska dig en stilla natt (Bo Kaspers Orkester)
Last Movie: Goncharov (1973) hmmm, i don't watch movies that much. was it my rewatch of CATWS? i actually think it was. that was in november.
Currently Reading: going down a wincest rabbit hole that @thisonesatellite sent me.
Currently Watching: doing the annual Fanny and Alexander (1982) watch (5 hrs version), saw part 1 yesterday.
Currently Consuming: coffee
Currently Craving: the crispbread that my mom makes for christmas. pure addiction.
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N.B. to spend $8 million over three years to support shelters, reduce homelessness
The New Brunswick government says it will spend $8 million over the next three years to better support emergency shelters and help reduce chronic homelessness.
With the new funding, the province says the budget for emergency shelters now exceeds $5 million annually, which is double the current amount.
The spending is said to be based on services provided at shelters, such as meals, community space, and hours of operation. Shelters must have plans in place to increase the number of beds available during extreme weather.
"The impacts of the growing number of people who are confronted with homelessness are being felt everywhere in our province, more often in urban areas," said Social Development Minister Dorothy Shephard in a news release. "I am pleased to see the provincial government will provide more financial support to help the development of long-term, permanent solutions to end chronic homelessness. We particularly want to ensure emergency shelter funding will be equitable across the province."
There are nine emergency shelters, which provide a total of 274 beds, across the province.
As of Aug. 31, the cities of Fredericton, Moncton, and Saint John saw 519 people known to have been experiencing homelessness, with 392 of those experiencing chronic homelessness.
"With freezing weather approaching, time is of the essence. We must work together with other levels of government to ensure every Monctonian can seek shelter in emergency, temporary and long-term affordable housing, and have access to mental health services and supports around addiction. I have spoken at length with the mayors of Saint John and Fredericton, and they, too, share our concerns for their respective communities," said Moncton Mayor Dawn Arnold.
According to the province, occupancy rates in Fredericton, Moncton, and Saint John averaged to be 86 per cent during the 2021-22 fiscal year.
From Nov. 1, 2021 to March 31, 2022, occupancy rates in Bathurst sat around 66 per cent while Miramichi saw 94 per cent.
The three-year plan is being developed by the Department of Social Development with the assistance of other government departments and the Union of the Municipalities of New Brunswick.
from CTV News - Atlantic https://ift.tt/afO3Rrq
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Forever Growing
Change is never easy. It’s slow and inevitable and terrifying. When I was growing up, I vowed to myself that I would never change. Too long I’d seen old friends become absolute strangers and I thought stemming that tide would be for the best. After all, why would I ever want to stop being the me that I was? A person that liked to occupy the most secretive nook in the corner and read with book in hand? A person that had the most vivid of imaginations that being the only child wasn’t as lonely a burden as my mother thought it was?
But life isn’t so easy as wishing quietly to yourself that you will never change and hoping that will forever remain the case.
When my stint in tertiary education ended, I found myself with far too much time and freedom. The price for not having the routine of attending classes and lectures and hanging out with friends meant that I also had responsibilities. After all, my mother and grandmother can’t keep supporting me until the end of time. Nor would they be willing to fund what they saw as my ‘gaming’ addiction.
I needed a job.
For that, I needed to change. Perhaps not as drastically as I thought ‘changes’ meant but it meant stepping out of my comfort zone and ‘growing up.’ I’ve ranted a few times on my blog that in the workplace, I’ve become the ‘reliable’ one. The one people go to when they have questions about hard complex functions because my high school education at a selective high school meant that I am also a repository of knowledge.
In order to become the ‘reliable’ one, though, I had to demonstrate a side of myself that hasn’t always been prevalent in my previous incarnations throughout high school. The hard worker. The person that keeps their nose to the grindstone and barely takes a few days off.
But even that was no easy feat.
My career has had its ups and downs. My first real job was something I kind of fell into when my mother saw me lounging around the house after I’d wrapped up my final uni course and was waiting for the graduation ceremony where I’d be given the degree I’d worked so hard for.
Funny now how it sits uselessly on my desk, untouched and essentially useless in the grand scheme of things.
While I showed that I was no slouch in the workplace, the work there was dragging at my soul. There were months when I dreaded going into work. Even though I had vowed for no change in my life back in my younger years, I knew that if something didn’t change in my current predicament, I would do something drastic.
Perhaps I hadn’t yet adjusted to the idea of full-time work. Or maybe the work I was doing simply wasn’t for me.
It took courage for me to finally tell my mother that I couldn’t continue like this and tender my resignation letter before going on the hunt for a new job that I wanted to do and would look past my relatively sparse history of employment as I’d never taken up anything during my years in high school or at university.
But change isn’t always about better job prospects (though my recent internal promotion is something that is both exciting and nervous). Change can be about the simple things or the ones that others might not see. My friends might have laughed at the idea that I was sprucing up my look by growing out my fringe but considering that I had the same haircut for fifteen years meant that even this subtle change in appearance was a huge step for me.
And though I didn’t achieve my goal of moving out, there are other things that have changed for me. Namely, my perception of friendship and the notion of ‘adulting.’
I, Kyndaris, have always been a creature of habit and routine. For years, I had done my due diligence in attending school, going to my lectures, working my 9-5 job. Despite that, it’s been the small choices that I’ve made that seem to have made the biggest impact on those that I know.
My decision to return to my old high school gym for weekly badminton saw me reunite with an old friend. Through my interactions with her, she was able to grow and change. I can’t say whether my actions were for good or for ill but from what she has told me, I played some part in motivating her in her own projects and path of self-discovery.
Though I know not many read my blogs or the stories that I crank out onto FictionPress, I like to think that some of the things I’ve chosen to do have also helped others discover new things that they might not have thought twice about. To be fair, though, the thought that I could make any ever-lasting change in someone else’s life seems downright impossible. I’ve never thought myself capable of wielding such a power (and my readership seems to similarly indicate that this is the case). Even if I did, I wouldn’t know what to do with it except maybe encourage people to stop running the world into the ground.
So, after nearly three decades on this Earth (my birthday being the week before this blog post goes up), I’ve learned that I definitely am no longer the young child that I was before. Yes, the person that I was will forever remain a part of who I am but as the world turns, I’ve learned that I, too, must remain flexible and adaptable to the situations I find myself in.
Still, that won’t stop me from imagining that I’m slaying a mighty dragon, sword in hand, or piloting a spaceship.
Nothing is ever static. And if ti were, I doubt the world would ever be as interesting as it is.
Even if I wish humans would stop doing stupid self-destructive things like plunging the entire globe into famine and pestilence.
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42 & 43 for invasive asks 😘
hi pretty girl <3
42. what do you think is the best room color?
HMMMM. i think greens are nice. yeah its my fsavourite colour but its also calming. like ok this is weird but im obsessed with green for bathrooms. like green and rustic browns and whites. its SO GORGEOUS and it would be so...oh my god yeah.
I also think like shades of browns and whites and golds are really cute. kind of like that lightish aesthetic vibe? hella cute too. i like home-y vibes so a lot of neutral tones but not those office building whites and greys. like earthy browns and leafy greens and woods. mmmmmm. yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
anyway i cant remember if i answered this properly. yeah yeah earthy tones and light colours. mmmmm. white is also nice to give it kind of a open space vibe. MY current bedroom is a very light sea green and my closet doors are all woody/bamboo designs and there's lots of white everywhere. it fits very nicely. but i would not die if i had a cute like...light brown room. cute beiges and golden hues.
like hello its cute. i dont LOVE the lack of colour (hence why i like the green bc you can add so much with it) but i think its very comfy, especially for a kitchen. most definitely for a kitchen.
ANYWAY MY MAIN ANSWER IS GREEN OMFG YOU DID NOT ASK FOR A WHOLE THESIS SORRY (my passion is interior design i cant be that sorry actually) yeah green. bc it offers that nice element of elegance (like darker shades of green) if paired with the right colours ( whites, blacks, gold) but can also give a homey rustic look for those earthy greens and some browns and whites and beiges, but ALSO an open air sort of look with lighter sea greens. mmm. yeah yeah yeah. UGHGBUJHBUGHUGHJGUJGH
43. what books did you grow up with?
oh man okay. Um. the FIRST book I read was. Harry Potter at the ripe little age of 3rd grade. dunno why but i saw it and i was like "what the hell." and then i got SO BORED bc Words. but then I read Charlotte's Web!!! and i loved it so so much. umm. But yeah primarily Harry Potter throughout a LOT LOT of years. My mother has a collection of her old books in arabic too so it was the perfect excuse. the first book gift i actually got was (from her) the third book. Very neat of her but it started an obsession and she regrets it.
Um oh I also read a LOT of those WISH romance stories? hang on omfg
this book. I bought that book from the book fair in primary school. i still have it- given the cover is completely ripped off and its so worn out from so many rereads (I owned a total of 5 books up until 2-3 years ago) but its my favourite. I read so so many others ones but this one stuck. Anyway that's where my romance addiction really started I think. I was obsessed. I still am. it's...yeah. t's special to me.
I also read Percy Jackson when I moved to a very rich school and had the pleasure of exploring the 2 floor huge ass library they had. It was a blessing. I had left some artwork behind when we moved and they have t hung in the library (I literally lived there oh my god ahaha).
OH OH THERE WAS OOOOH M GOF OKAY
god ciara you opened pandora's box with this one
i read these books. oh my fucking god i own the series- msot of it. i ALSO read them at the rich fancy school which my parents paid like 5000$ for anyway
HELLO. it started my love for fantasy i think. i loved harry potter i DID and while i do enjoy books that are similar to it (heavy fantasy, big magical systems) such as, for example, ACOTAR bu SJM (I have not read those books. But they are a big example and similar genres to Harry Potter)
I really really love the simple easy goings of retellings and silly little fantasies. Land of Stories literally shaped my life. It's why I gravitate much more towards fantasies like the Caravel series by Stephanie Garber or Once Upon a Broken Heart by Stephanie Garber (she 's my favourite author EVER.). they're light and they have that princess-y magical vibe- not the wands and wizards magic or the supernatural magic but more like....the fairy tale magic. im a simple girl at heart. give me fairy tales and i will giggle to myself for hours on end.
anyway yeah. those are the books that pretty much shaped my whole life. i got into historical retellings and sci fi and shit way after but those books got to me and influenced me so much I can pinpoint the exact points of how they changed me and how they led to me reading ehat i read today
anyway.
anyway. i will shut up before i get to more.
I LOVE YOU CIARA
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