#i dont even remember him dropping this merch this is so fucked
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im actually gonna cry i want this hoodie so fucking bad (the one in the tweet has been sold already) if anyone knows where i could find this online i would love you forever😭😭😭😭😭
#i am DESPERATE#god what a gorgeous fucking hoodie#i dont even remember him dropping this merch this is so fucked#dnp#daniel howell#dan and phil#you will get through this night#ash is mentally ill#phan#phandon#dip and pip#danisnotonfire#sorry. tagging for the extrachanxe that someone that knows where to find this sees it
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I think i started to follow you bc of tiny!cas, like eons ago, let me tell you seeing you get into different fandoms over the years has been a delight.
I remember seeing post of you going like 'hey these slasher film kinda go hard' and look at you know.
I mean this in the best way possible, I feel i've been watching a house plant grow, every now and then catching my attention and being amazed by the changes
omg thats such a sweet way of describing my... well happy autism awareness day everyone, its a nice way of describing the way i naturally transition through my Special Interests lmfao
actually, for the holiday, let me infodump about this very aspect of my brain to anyone who isnt aware how this works for me. (also every autistic person is different, so this is just how this symptom manifests in me)
ill say "phases" to simplify, though thats an unfair word because it implies im "over" my past phases. 99% of my past phases are pretty much there for life, but in the back of my mind. (So long as I didnt have a "bad breakup" with it for some reason, which is rare but happens) The ability to become a raving lunatic about it is dormant until someone asks the right question.
There can only be one interest (sometimes 2, with one being the less dominant one) at the forefront of my brain at a time, though. that defines the "phase".
so for example, my recent Halloween phase is "over" and I am 100% fully into Saw now, but I still absolutely love Halloween and Michael and Jason and all those guys. as evident by me still happily sharing gifsets and art and buying merch etc if it tickles my fancy. They're just hanging out in the background of my mental display case.
yea whoever follows my tumblr for a very long time has watched it happen in realtime. the transition between interests. i know for a fact which phase I started this blog on. if you're here from the beginning, youve seen, in order:
-Durarara!!
-Deus Ex
-Supernatural
-Godzilla
-Detroit: Become Human
-There was like a few weeks where it was HLVRAI
-And then it was plants. There was a year-long stretch with no Special Interest and I was latching onto odd things (and I was very inactive here)
-Halloween & Friday the 13th
-and now, Saw
I have many other things I love, but they don't clamp around my brain in quite the same extreme way.
my phases can last any amount of time, anywhere from a few short intense months to 5+ years, its completely random, completely unpredictable. even the interest itself is impossible to predict. its not something i choose, its something that happens to me.
sometimes i avoid watching things for a long time because im still very emotionally attached to my current phase and im genuinely afraid the shiny new thing will replace it. all art or fic ideas for the previous phase? theyll be abandoned. all I will want to create will be related to the new thing. (though I will sometimes draw it anyway, like digging up old toys to play with once in a while. The likelihood just drops considerably)
which is why right now i pretty much put a pause on the other franchises I plan on watching. I'm genuinely gripping onto Saw like someone is tryin to take it from me.
and then sometimes im like "haha yeah right. ill be fine. ill eat my shoe if my brain latches to this" and then put on the movie and by the credits roll im a new person (yes thats what happened with Saw. I really had no idea.)
this is also why im terrified of even just "checking out" things that have, like, a toxic fanbase or something, because i cant stop a new phase from happening if it does. and its really hard to keep it to myself, fuck
(do u know how mad i was when i realized i was attaching to hoffman the evil dirty cop??? i was so scared of drawing him, dudes. but thankfully everyones been cool abt it and we're all very aware of his awfulness & we have fun w it)
and every time my brain changes and i do get obsessed with some new thing, i get really scared and worried and hope I dont bother everyone who followed me for something else :(((( and yet, every time, im absolutely floored by how many people choose to tolerate my newest nonsense and stick around anyway
anyway ive lost the plot of what point i was making here OH YEAH thank you!
tl;dr: that would be the autism! thank you, it WILL happen again! that is a threat! 🥰
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** rare Otome lore drop **
Okay so this is continuing off the 'first' meeting, Choro has approached the table with Oso, (who just witnessed Otome pull a con while being cute and bubbly, and then watched as she let that mask fall to talk with their buddies) and they're now being all bubbly cutey again toward the brothers.
So then theyre like doing their cute little shtick to them and even tho Oso knows its a scam to get money from otaku pervs, he almost finds himself falling for it, i genuinely think she gets the rest of Choros money that he had planned to use for other artists by paying Otome to give him these kisses (on the merch and on his cheeks), and afterwards he's like, shriveled and deflated. Otome looks to Oso and …… like i know what i WANT to be said here but, i don't know how Oso would reply, but i think... Otome asks him if he's interested as well and he turns them down either because he opens his wallet and a fly flies out OR like, i want him to maybe say something like that he KNOWS their shtick and that he was watching the whole time and Otome just responds with like the expression below being like "tee hee you got me"
OKAY SO I think that ends with like Oso picking up the shriveled, lipstick mark covered Choro and he looks at Otome, he looks at her wares one more time, which has boobs plastered everywhere, and then looks at Otome again who is standing there with their hands on their hips cause since he knows the cute thing is a scam might as well just stand normally and he just smirks and says 'nice tits' and she pauses and smirks and she crosses her arms in a way that pushes up her boobs and is like 'mine or the art?' and i thiiiink he would respond with 'why not both?' and laughs and walks off with Choros corpse?? i think... yeah
So the next time they cross paths is a few weeks later actually and its late at night and Otome is chilling at night in the park, like same one where Nyaa 'fell in love with' Oso i think?? Otome is just on a bench, drinking some beer, relaxing, and Oso is cutting through the park to head home and sees them and i think he doesnt know/remember their name so i think he, because he is Oso and has no tact and doesnt care if there are people around (there are) and just yells 'hey pervert!' basically yelling 'hentai' at them, and they have a little spat like 'oh my god dont go around just yelling that!' and hes like 'whaaaat why not its what you are isnt it? whacha doin out here? ohh hey you got beer? any chance youd be willing to give me one????' and they look in their plastic bag with their beer and their snacks and are feeling generous so they actually do give him one and they kinda just shoot the shit? like they talk, they finally learn eachothers names… i want the exchange to be funny but im not sure how… but anyway he ends up asking about their work, like asking about different kinks theyve drawn and stuff, and theyre just being totally open about it and not being shy or anything about sex stuff and Osomatsu is like… not smitten but like… hes like enraptured with her? like 'hoooolllyyy shit shes just talking about blowjobs and tit fucks like its nothing' in his head and then its revealed that theyre out right now procrastinating working because, the scene from this piece, theyre on the bench complaining about their editor not liking armpits or whatever, so theyre procrastinating and theyre out drinking cause they cant get any good ideas and then they kinda falter and they get this look on their face that they just got an idea, but right then they get a call from their editor or something to figure out their gameplan and they have to leave and tell Oso that its been fun and give him the last beer to take
And then timeskip to a few weeks later and Oso is reading hentai Choro picked up, and theres a story thats kinda vaguely familiar about two people meeting in the park, theyve met before at a book fair or something, then they have sex in the park or something like that, and Oso realizes that its Otome who drew it and basically assumes that they wanna have sex with him…. tee hee end episode/bit there
Ive had this rattling in my head and in my drafts for a bit. ... heh hehehe heh
#spice.ososan#spice.txt#otome#otoso#spice.lewd#i guess bc mention of porn??#whatever i uhhhhhh i like otome.... and uhhhhhhhhhh#uhhhhhh#yeah
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Well then. Uhm. Yeah.
I dont even remember how I found techno's channel because depression fucks with your memory like that. I do remember it was christmas break, and I had just decided to drop out of university, and I felt so incredibly lost and alone. It was a year into quarantine. And then I decided to watch his videos. And he helped so much. He got me out of my art block and got me creating again and talking to people again. I joined a dream smp fan discord and made a couple friends that I honestly couldn't do without, now. He doesn't know in what way he touched people's lives. It's. Insane. I'm not sure I've fully processed the news and I don't think I will for at least another few hours. I have always appreciated his attitude, his ability to make me laugh with him even when he announced he was sick, and I love that he's even made me laugh with this last line of merch. What an insane guy /pos. I hope he's looking down and laughing at all our silly sentimentality. It's what he would've wanted.
Miss you, Technoblade
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Kazuichi, Byakuya, Gundham, Rantaro, Gonta, Leon, and Toko with an ultimate Broadway actress s/o
Desc; headcanons of kazuichi, byakuya, gundham, rantaro, gonta, leon, toko with an ultimate broadway actress s/o
Warnings; i tried to make this spoiler free, fem!reader, reader uses female pronouns, i guess this takes place at hope’s peak academy? pre-tragedy?? i dont really know about the v3 boys, haven’t finished the game lmao-
Gundham:
◊ He already knows a bunch about Musicals; especially the darker ones.
◊ He thinks your Ultimate is amazing, he loves all your plays.
◊ Neither of you know which between the two of you is more dramatic.
◊ Your dramatic personalities often intertwined, merging the two of you and making you both into one huge drama queen.
◊ It gives everyone a headache as you both scream, “My toe hurts!-” “My king’s toe hurts! Someone bring an ambulance, stat!”
◊ “Someone get the fucking chlorofoam-” “Hiyoko no-”
◊ This is a bad example, but you get my point-
◊ He enjoys Shakespeare and dark love story plays/musicals.
◊ So he would definitely enjoy acting one with you on stage, if you let him.
◊ He’ll somehow incorporate his Dark Devas into the play just for an excuse to bring them with him on-stage.
◊ Once he was playing Romeo and abandoned Juliet to save Cham-P after he ran offstage to eat a sunflower seed someone dropped on the floor.
◊ Fuck Juliet, mans knows his priorities.
◊ He’s kind of a musical theatre nerd, he enjoys discussing the message behind musicals you’ve played.
◊ Throwing in some compliments about how well you perceived the character, and how pretty you looked.
◊ He is always extremely proud and amazed at your ability to sing, dance and act so well all at the same time.
◊ He believes you don’t get enough credit for doing what you do, so he makes sure you know how proud he is of you.
◊ He sometimes quotes Shakespeare or some other dark musical while you two hung out, it was kinda cute seeing him geek out like that.
◊ “As said in ‘The Merry Wives of Windsor’, Better three hours too soon than a minute too late." Gundham quoted, pride laced in his words as he was proud of remembering that. “Gundham... it’s literally 5 am in the morning, the party starts at 12 pm. Go back to sleep.” Gundham blinks and nearly falls asleep where he stood. “Mmkay.”
◊ If he saw you dress up as the witch in Wicked, he would be whipped.
◊ His evil queen? In an evil costume? A dream come true!
◊ He thinks you look absolutely fabulous and praises you a bunch after the show, telling you how pretty you looked while you acted.
Kazuichi
◊ He wouldn’t know much about musical theatre, since he’s more into machines.
◊ But when you told him to come to a play you were going to star in, he jumped at the offer.
◊ 90 minutes of you? He must be the luckiest guy in the world!(Nagito would be proud)
◊ After watching his first play, he decides he is obsessed with musical theatre now, going to all your shows.
◊ He loves all the romance based musicals, he’s a sucker for romance what can he say?
◊ He’d obsess over all your plays, going into a lot of detail about his favourtite parts.
◊ He’s kinda like, your #1 fan.
◊ He has posters of musicals you’ve starred posted around his dorm room, just a bunch of merch of you and all the musicals you starred in.
◊ When you tell him he has a backstage pass because he’s your boyfriend, he is overjoyed.
◊ He actually trained a bit to be one of the backstage crew members.
◊ He learned how to fix your make up during intermissions, fix a loose stitch on your costume, all that good stuff.
◊ Though every time he sees your face up close for make up, he goes speechless.
◊ He wonders every time, how the hell did he get someone like you?
◊ Though his hands are shaking from how nervous he was, he still managed to make you look absolutely amazing.
◊ He’d blast a bunch of musical soundtracks while he works on his machines, screwing on and unscrewing things with a bop.
◊ I can imagine Kazuichi jamming with you in the car. The car moving violently as you two bounced to the rhythm like mad men.
◊ I think he’d get pretty insecure if he saw you with a love interest, he would think that when you two shared a staged kiss or scene, that it was actually full of love and not fake
◊ But when you cheer him up and tell him how much you love him, he realizes he was being silly over nothing.
◊ After watching many many romance musicals, you notice he gets more romantic; most likely mimicking the love interests.
◊ He is still a bit insecure, but if he does more romantic things, you’ll love him right?
◊ You enjoy the silly grand gestures of love, but you try and assure him constantly that you don’t need any of it.
◊ You only need him <3
Rantaro:
◊ w o a h
◊ He’d love the fact that you’re an actress
◊ He thinks it’s so cool like-
◊ constant fanboying after shows
◊ He’s always bringing you flowers once you’re off the stage, showering you with praises and affections
◊ He’s literally so proud of you wtf??
◊ i think he’d be the type to show you off a lot
◊ “Hey you!” He points at a naked passerby(this is an inside joke, i am so sorry), “Guess what? My girlfriend’s a Broadway actress!” “Rantaro stop, people are staring-” “Are they? hEY YOU! YEAH, YOU STARING!! MY GIR-”
◊ if you ever started spitting out hamilton raps, he’d be the one beatboxing in the back ground for you.
◊ “Pshh, packow, psshh psshh, packow!” “How does a bastard, orphan, son of a-”
◊ you two would jam out to musical soundtracks in your dorm, dancing dramatically as you did.
◊ you two kinda become like a duo of musical theatre kids.
◊ if you stood on a table and started belting lyrics, he would hop on and join you
◊ unless it was a solo, he would never steal your thunder.
◊ if you ever felt a bit nervous before a big show, he would assure you that’d you’d do great and tell you how much he believed in you until you felt better.
◊ he’s your charger before and after a big show.
◊ if you felt exhausted from acting and dancing around the stage, he’s always there to give you what you need most.
◊ whether it’s water, food, flowers, or just him and his cuddles, he always has it ready for you.
◊ the most recent musical soundtrack that you’ve played will be stuck in his head.
◊ For example, if you recently played in Hairspray, ‘Mama, I’m a big girl now!’ will be stuck in his head until the next play he watches.
◊ you’d catch him humming it during everything he does,
◊ and it’s actually so fricking adorable.
◊ if you heard him sing a familiar tune, you would hum along with him.
◊ “Hmm, mmwhen I was, just a kid ♪”
◊ Your ears perked up at the familiar tune, slowly you turned around to face him.
◊ “♪....You never let me do just what the older kids did…♪” You joined in quietly, Rantaro whipped his head towards you, a rising smile on his face.
◊ “♪ But lose that laundry list of what you won't allow ♪,” His voice rose slowly in excitement, pointing at you with a big grin across his face.
◊ And at the same time, you both sang obnoxiously loud, as if it was rehearsed, “♪ 'Cause mama, I'm a big girl now! ♪” Running to each other with excitement,
◊ You let out a fit of giggles as Rantaro picked you up, “MY WIFE, PLEASE BE MY WIFE!”
◊ This is how you two met and you can’t tell me otherwise-
Gonta:
◊ Gonta wouldn’t know much about Broadway musicals- which to you, a broadway actress, was unacceptable!
◊ so you made it your mission to get him to watch as many musicals as he possibly can.
◊ You’d tell him to come to all your plays, him excitedly agreeing despite not knowing what a play is.
◊ You’d do extra good knowing that Gonta was in the crowd watching you, wanting to give him the best first experience with musicals.
◊ He’d applaud at the end of every scene, trying to show his support the best he can.
◊ for his first play he watches, he ends up clapping a bit too early.
◊ he cheered and applauded super loud when he saw you on stage, but stopped when he realized everyone was staring at him.
◊ Though it was a bit embarrassing for both you and him, you felt your heart flutter at how his first instinct was to clap for you when you walked in stage.
◊ You’d introduce him to various musicals, beauty and the beast being his favourite.
◊ He definitely starts to obsess over the more ‘gentlemanly’ characters.
◊ his first impressions of the beast were bad; Denying that old lady shelter? How ungentlemanly!!
◊ so when the dude got cursed, he cheered lmao
◊ but as he kept watching, he could see the beast wasn’t too bad.
◊ The beast had some flaws, but he obviously cared for belle, he thought.
◊ Oh but he hated Gaston, he really really hated him.
◊ If you acted with someone who played Gaston(and you as belle), he would have to hold back and not rip his face off every time Gaston said something idiotic or sexist.
◊ He had to keep reminding himself that, that Gaston wasn’t real(and thank god for that, real gaston would’ve been torn to shreds.)
◊ the dancing scene was his favourite part for sure.
◊ He’s sad he doesn’t get to play beast with you, but he still enjoys the scene nonetheless.
◊ something cute I can imagine him doing is surprising you by dressing up in a prince costume from the musical and asking you for a dance.
◊ It’s the cutest thing ever oml-
◊ It’s such a beautiful moment, you two just dancing together in a random room with no care in the world.
◊ Your arms wrapped his extravagant costume and his arms wrapped around your pj’s.
◊ He’s a bit shy to be so close to you, but he tries his best to be confident and as princely as he could so he pushes his anxiety aside.
◊ As his stomach fills with butterflies, he becomes slightly confused and concerned, ‘Did Gonta eat butterflies??’ He slightly panics-
◊ ‘Those poor butterflies!!’
◊ He’d watch a lot of videos on how to ballroom dance in advance for this moment.
◊ He’s actually not that bad!
◊ Well- as long as you dance with your feet on his, so he doesn’t crush your toes.
◊ If you ever did some beauty and the beast scenes for him, he would be so happy.
◊ He’d be even happier if you let him play the beast with you.
◊ He’d be smiling the entire time during a fight/sad/serious practice scene.
◊ *almost gets stabbed* “Haha oh no!”
◊ When you sing during one of the scenes, he kinda just-
◊ becomes a puddle of a gentleman.
◊ his heart melts and disintegrates(haha what) of love for you.
◊ he absolutely loves your voice, and would beg for you to sing him one of the soundtracks from beauty and the beast before bed.
◊ He’s really proud of all your plays, and is extremely happy that you–of all people–are his girlfriend.
Byakuya Togami
◊ In all honesty, he thinks your ultimate isn’t all that great.
◊ But as he watches one of your plays, his mind ultimately(see what i did there?) changes.
◊ He becomes impressed and dazzled from how passionate you look when you act, not noticing how you had him sitting on the edge of his seat.
◊ After watching you act, he literally cannot watch another play unless you are in it, finding it unworthy of his time and money.
◊^^this is before you two got together,
◊ you two got together after you found him in your crowd, applauding like the rest of them with the same bewildered expression on his face.
◊ You confronted him and he attempted to compliment your acting, but he accidentally let his feelings for you slip out instead, “I find you truly captivating- Wait no, I-I meant your plays. Your plays, they are truly captivating.” You watched in amusement as he stumbled with his words, eventually interrupting him with an, “Are you available right now?”
◊ So yeah, eventually you two get together, and good for Togami! Because now he doesn’t have to secretly applaud you as a fan, he can applaud you whenever and as your lover.
◊ After shows, he’d give you a single rose as a congrats or applause (so romantic!)
◊ If you ever decided to be chaotic and start belting out lyrics, he would just sigh and let you finish.
◊ Very rarely, you would catch him humming a small tune of a musical song you sang.
◊ But very very rarely. If you ever catch him and confront him about it, he will deny it completely.
◊ I think he’d probably like the more serious plays, he enjoys the meanings and emotions of them more than the sillier and playful ones.
◊ If he ever watched Mean Girls, he would start to slightly mimic Regina George.
◊ “Byakuya wha-” “Get in peasant, we’re going shopping.”
◊ It’d be lowkey hot when you hear him sass you like Regina George tho-
◊ He’d have more big dick energy after watching Mean Girls, emitting his dominance to everyone.
◊ Makoto during a class trial: “So we know that she was at the scene of the crime, right?” “Shut up.” Byakuya flipped his imaginary long hair as Makoto stares at him in confusion, silence filling the room. “Shut up!” “I didn’t even say anything-”
◊ “The new motive is going to be-!” “Whatever, I’m getting cheese fries a book.” Byakuya sighed, turning on his heels and catwalking away.
◊ ...
◊ “IT’S PUNISHMENT TIME-!” “MONOKUMA WAIT NO-”
Leon
◊ Would go to every one of your shows.
◊ Would act like an absolute mom in the crowd.
◊*holding a video camera* You’re doing great sweetie!.
◊”That’s my girl!”
◊ You’d get embarrassed every time he does that.
◊ Hypes you up when you get nervous before going on stage.
◊ In back stage, he’d praise you and give you a bouquet of flowers.
◊ Where did they come from? When did he have time to get flowers when he was yelling in the crowed??
◊ Helps you rehearse lines even if he has no idea what they’re about.
◊ Will fight anyone that makes mean comments towards you.
◊ Even if it’s just constructive criticism, he will take it as an insult.
◊ “Hey s/o! You did great! Maybe next time you could-”
◊ Leon: “WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY PUNK!? DO YOU KNOW WHO SHE IS?! I HAVE FRICKING ARMS OF STEEL, I WILL-”
◊ Will take every chance to pick you up and call you a queen.
◊ When you guys watch other plays together, he always says how you’d play a better role or that you’d do so much better.
◊ He is pretty jealous of your talent, he has always wanted to be a singer instead of a baseball star, but his ultimate wouldn’t allow that.
◊ So if you let him sing some musical song duets with you, his heart will be so full.
◊ You make him so happy, he almost breaks into cries.
◊ You two of weekly karoake nights, always singing some Heather’s duet together.
◊ One time, you, Sayaka and Leon sang the Candy Store song, Leon being Heather Chandler, Sayaka as Heather Duke, and you as Heather McNamara.
◊ It was... amazing.
◊ Everyone was cheering, clapping and it praising all of you.
◊ You made Leon feel alive, and he really, really loves you for that.
Toko
◊ She loves your ultimate, and fangirls over you a bunch.
◊ She’s amazed at your confidence to go up in stage, knowing she could never do that.
◊ She thinks your confidence is kinda hot, and decides she is in love.
◊ Likes to add a character in her books that are a lot like you, maybe making them a broadway actress-
◊ She thinks about you a lot, sometimes accidentally blurting out how pretty you were in your last performance in front of everybody.
◊ You confronted her for it, and she almost passed out.
◊ “W-w-why d-do you think t-t-that? D-d-do you th-think you’re b-better than m-me or so-something?”
◊ You already know her and her inferiority complex, so you don’t take offence to what she said, simply replying with, “I think you’re really cute.”
◊ Toko goes silent, except for a few “!??!??” noises that came out of her.
◊ “... U-uh, a-are you j-joking, be-because that isn’t f-funny!” She flushes, denying that you complimented her.
◊ “I’m not joking, here’s my number! Call me, kay?” You grinned before turning on your heel.
◊ She’s kinda dumbfounded, did her crush just ask her out??
◊ She denies it hard at first, not believing that you asked her out.
◊ Thus, not calling you.
◊ Well, I mean, she kinda did.
◊ She dialed your number one day, feeling a bit lonely.
◊ But as she heard your morning voice, she squeaked and hung up quickly.
◊ She felt her face turn into a fireball, her thoughts going into overdrive from how attractive your voice sounded.
◊ Your voice, she was attracted to your voice.
◊ The next day, when you ask her about what that call was about, she denies it and calls you stupid.
◊ Sprinting away while she screamed, “I-i-idiot!!”
◊ Acts like an absolute tsundere around you.
◊ You constantly flirt with her, trying to get her to accept a date with you.
◊ Being the dramatic hoe you are, you try and give her a declaration of your love.
◊ Knowing she is the Ultimate Writer, and into poems, you write one for her.
◊ You declared your love during one of your plays, knowing she sat in the crowd somewhere.
◊ You interrupted a scene and jumped off stage, “Toko Fukawa!”
◊ Her head perked up in surprise, eyes widening as she saw you on one knee for her.
◊ “W-what are you d-doing!?” She yelped, moving her legs away from you.
◊ “I am in love with you. Completely and utterly in love with you, everyday when I see you so immersed in writing a book, I believe I am looking at an angel.”
◊ The crowd stared at the both of you, gasps and aws filling the air.
◊ Toko flushed, you watched her while she wrote?
◊ “For every time you’ve told me I was a fool, an idiot, you weren’t wrong. Because I am a fool, a fool in love with you.” You had one had on your chest, looking into her eyes sincerely.
◊ Her eyes glossed over so slightly you couldn’t see, looking around at the crowd before uttering out, “Y-y-you r-really love m-me, h-huh?” Her face contorting into a lopsided smirk, watching as you giggled.
◊ You laughed out, “Absolutely.”
◊ WHY DID THIS TURN INTO A ONESHOT WHAT WHY WHAT WHYYY
note; thank you so much for reading and sorry for the wait!! we tried our best to finish these together, thank you so much for your patience.
#mod bread#mod chia#mod toby#danganronpa trigger happy havoc#super danganronpa 2#gonta gokuhara#danganronpa headcanons#gonta x reader#gonta headcanons#rantaro amami#rantaro x reader#rantaro headcanons#gundham x reader#gundham tanaka#gundham headcanons#kazuichi x reader#kazuichi souda#kazuichi headcanons#toko fukawa#toko x reader#toko headcanons#leon kuwata x reader#Leon headcanons#leon kuwata#byakuya togami#byakuya togami x reader#byakuya headcanons
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Pregnant s/o hcs: Mirio, Bakugo, Todoroki, Midoriya, Iida, Tamaki
SFW, just super fluffy
Mirio:
If you don’t think this man is tearing up when you tell him... uhhh you’d be wrong
He is crying over you and so happy, will kneel and just kiss your tummy
And when you’re in bed that night going to sleep, every few minutes he will nuzzle in closer and whisper, “hey guess what? We’re gonna have a baby”
Anytime he says he loves you now he says it to your tummy too
“I love you Y/n, I love that you are mine and I love that you’re going to be the mother of my child” *bends down* “And I love you too baby”
He will have a really hard time waiting until the second trimester to tell anyone but once he is able, everyone will know, and he’s going to have a party in your honor.
He will treat you like a queen, back rubs and foot rubs...
I feel like when you first tell him you’re pregnant he will come home a few days later with a box... when you open it, it’s a maternity dress, and its actually really pretty, with lace and silk, and nice and stretchy...
“I know you don’t need it now, but I saw it when I was out and thought it would look perfect on you...”
He will compliment you every second of every day, will trace your stretch marks and tell you they make you beautiful because it’s all part of you becoming a mother, it’s a natural tattoo, a reminder of how you’re growing a life inside you
He will want to throw a gender reveal party
And no, it can’t be as simple as balloons popping out of a box, he’s gotta have something extravagant to celebrate like fireworks, monster trucks, or a paid actor dressed as a baby
You’re having his baby! This is a pinnacle moment in his life and he is not about to have some basic ass party
Mirio is definitely the kind of guy who thinks you can’t have sex because it could hurt the baby, you will have to make a very embarrassing call to your doctor about that...
He is looking forward to owning dad sandals (who are we kidding he prolly already does)
Bakugo:
This man will shit himself, make sure he is sitting down
“Bakugo... I’m pregnant”
“Hah?”
“I’m having a baby! You’re gonna be a dad”
He’s really happy and excited, he has no doubt you’ll be an amazing mom but he’s kinda worried about him being a dad...
Am I fit to raise a kid? Will I be a good dad?
He will probably start working more and almost go on over drive... He will start coming home later, picking up earlier shifts... And when you ask him, “Katsuki, are you not happy about the baby?” He will kinda break down and tell you “No of course I’m fucking happy about the baby, I just want the world to be safe for our kid... and I only have 8 months till then and-” He drops to his knees in front of you and he’s tearing up. You’ll get onto your knees too and just hug him, “Katsuki, you can’t fix the world before we have our baby,” you’ll look at him lovingly as he realizes how absurd he was being. “But we can prepare to be the best parents we can be...” “Prepare? We’re already gonna be the best parents.”
Okay, Bakugo hypes up the baby too, like...
“Katsuki, come here! The baby is kicking!” *he puts his hand on your tummy* “Baby’s so strong, just like us,” *grabs you and kisses you* “I knew we made a fucking perfect kid”
He will try kill anyone who oversteps the boundary with the bump (like touching the bump without asking)
“OI EXTRA, you wanna take your fucking hands off my woman and my kid or do I have to do that for you...”
Bakugo would be very unnecessarily competitive in birthing class
Will wake you up in the middle of the night at least once, he’s just laying on his back staring wide eyed at the ceiling... “What if I explode the baby?”
You’ll roll over and look at him annoyed, “you won't explode the baby,”
He will settle again once you give him cuddles
You cannot tell me that he would not be your biggest cheerleader when you’re actually giving birth, “PUSH, FUCKING PUSH DUMB ASS!”
Todoroki:
This man freaks out for a sec... cuz daddy issues. But he has a strong resolve so he will come out of it quickly and decide how to
“Shoto, you aren’t anything like Endeavor, you’re going to be an amazing dad”
He will be extremely happy, but his excitement will be softer
Everyday after you tell him he says you’re glowing
He will want to cook you special things because it’s healthy for the baby, or so his mother told him
Speaking of his mother, she taught him how to knit when he went to visit her in the hospital so you’ll find him knitting little hats and bootie and jackets for the baby
He will nest just as much, if not more than you do
You’ll find him awake at 3AM trying to put together some bullshit ikea thing for the baby with the tiny allen wrench they give you for free. “Shoto, come back to bed... we can do that in the morning” “But the baby needs somewhere to sleep,” “Yes, and I’m not due for another two months”
Shoto is already so soft but I think he would be softer
Like when you fall asleep on the couch, he gets home and just cuddles up to you and asks your bump how it’s day was. He will talk to the bump until you wake up and then he just pepper your face with kisses.
He is the only one of all these men who doesn’t shit himself and die when watching the birthing tape. I think he would be calm and say something like “a woman’s body is made to carry and deliver a child, there’s nothing to be frightened of.”
Midoriya:
When you tell him, he’s gonna cry
He will want to call his mom right away
Midoriya is the kinda guy to have a box of his things from when he was a kid stored away to give to his child (it’s all All Might merch but, ya know)
He definitely panics and worries if he is going to be a good father but he takes all that anxiety and just turns it into energy to care for you with
He is already signing you up for birthing classes
This man would take you to all your doctors visits, acupuncture appointments, prenatal massages, and even a strange healing session done in the back room of a health good shop (don’t worry, he checked google reviews, 346 people, and 5 stars) (You weren't sure about it at first, but you felt very at peace afterwards, def worth the 5 star review)
He just really wants you to be happy and healthy
It would be understatement to say he treats you like a queen... he treats you like a goddess, and he tells you everyday how grateful he is that you’re his love and giving him a baby. Especially when you feel insecure about how your body is changing
He will want to make the nursery Hero themed... with an All Might wall decal... you’ll eventually opt for something a little less... exuberant like jungle animals or something. But the compromise is the All Might mobil that spins and says “I am here” while playing twinkle twinkle little star.
He will read to the bump, and sing to it because he wants the baby to know his voice
Will make a ‘goodnight’ song with you for the baby to sing to it every night
Tenya:
Tenya is so excited and immediately starts thinking of things he needs to do for you and baby
The day after he will come home with a bag from the store full of prenatal vitamins and herbal teas that are safe to drink
“My love! I have brought you Evening Primrose supplements, it’s supposed to help with your delivery.”
I think he has name ideas picked out already and is very excited to show them to you. They are all related to the Iida family.
He would ask his brother for advice and would be so excited to tell him when it’s time.
Don’t even worry about pregnancy brain. Iida’s got you, he will help you remember everything you need to know and he will be patient with your cloudy thoughts.
Iida is so matter of fact tho, I can see it coming off as insensitive, especially when you’re dealing with mood swings.
“Darling, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you it’s just that those chips make your stomach hurt and I was only trying to-” “YOU JUST DONT WANT ME TO BE HAPPYYYY!!!!!!” “My darling, I want all the happiness in the world for you, you are the mother of my child, I- please don’t cry”
He really loves you a lot and he will learn to be a little gentler with you during this phase of the pregnancy
Braxton hicks contractions (the little fake contractions you get during the third trimester, closer to the due date) will send him into panic mode.
But he is also so organized that he is R E A D Y
You clutch your stomach and inhale sharply and sit down, he’s already running to get the hospital bag and getting the keys for the car.
(The hospital bag includes, diapers, baby clothes, blankets, stress balls for you to squeeze during contractions and a birth mix which includes mostly Baroque composers but theres a few taylor swift and harry styles songs because he thinks it would be cool if the baby was born to Adore You, because Iida adores you and that baby so much)
Tamaki:
He is terrified
But ultimately knowing that he has a child on the way actually does wonders for his confidence because he wants his child to have a good example and he doesn’t want the child to inherit his crippling shyness
He really is there for you and much like Shoto, shows it in a soft way
Tamaki is so food oriented already that he is especially considerate of your cravings and would probably try them, no matter how weird they are
Pregnancy makes you super hungry but thats okay because Tamaki is a brilliant cook
Tamaki is also very sensitive to the knowledge that it will change after the baby is born and that he has you all to himself for just a little while longer
He is going to take you on special weekend trips, like a sleepy beach town to just relax and eat good food
He will also take you on extra dates because he just wants to soak up your time together as a couple
He is very aware of how much work you’re doing constantly to carry his child and he will want to spoil you
“Y-you’re just so beautiful, a-and you chose me, and now you’re carrying my child...I just... I love you so much and thank you for letting me be yours b-because you make me so happy.”
He will freak out when he sees the birthing tape
“I-I am so sorry, I can’t believe I’ve put you through this... you’re- you- This is all my fault...” *panic panic panic*
But when you’re actually in labour he is very supportive, he will just apologize while you’re screaming in agony and wish there was something else he could do other than bring you ice chips...
#bnha#mha#mha hcs#bnha hcs#tamaki#iida#deku#midoriya#izuku#katsuki#bakugo#todoroki#mirio#shoto#amajiki#togota
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request: “angst with my boy Ryou!! i’ve been in a daiya mood the last few weeks and I actually forgot how much I loved ryou and harada. this has a lot of timeskips so bare with me here. ”
character: ryousuke kominato, harada masatoshi.
fandom: ace of diamond / daiya no ace
song recommendation: i dont fuck with you - big sean.
it was the end of your third year and you looked at Ryou with loving expression. it wasn’t a mystery to see you looking at him with love eyes. the two of you got together at the begging of both of your second year. you managed to fight your way through his heart and at first, he thought you were just going to be some high school girlfriend but once Ryou realize that he actually loved you, it all changed.
the two of you would sneak off at night to enjoy an impromptu date night. there was a few times where Kataoka seen you but he minded his business and turned the other way. he knew that outside distractions did benefit a player as it kept them from over working themselves.
it wasn’t until the end of the year when everything took a turn for the worst. you had applied for a few universities in Japan but the one you were aiming to attend was Hokkaido University. You didn’t think you were actually going to get in but when you checked your mail and seen the acceptance letter, you let out a scream of happiness.
“FUJIWARA GUESS WHAT!” you screamed as you slammed the door to your shared dorm wide open, “what are you screaming for?” she asked as she noticed your excitement.
you slammed the letter on the desk as she smiled, “me too!” she screamed showing you the same letter she received. you gave her a smile before tackling her into a hug, “roomies?” you screamed as she laughed before agreeing.
“I can’t believe we actually got in!” you exclaimed, “I wonder if Ryou got in. having my boyfriend and my best friend attending the same school would be a dream!” you flopped down on your bed, holding your letter to your chest.
-
“what do you mean you’re not going to Hokkaido?” you asked as you looked at Ryou with tears pricking your eyes, “did you not get accepted? or are you just denying it?”
Ryou showed you the plethora of acceptance letters he received and although he did receive an acceptance to Hokkaido, he was denying it to go to Osaka.
“we’re not attending the same school.” you whispered, “Ryou, you do realize that, right?” he nodded as he grabbed all your acceptance letters and seen that Osaka was not one of your choices.
he sighed, “did you even apply to Osaka?” you shook your head no, “you knew I wasn’t. I told you that my top choices were the Hokkaido, Kyoto, and the University of Southern California.”
you jokingly took an entrance test for a school in America and once you got your results back in, you realized that you did get in. your parents pushed you to attend it but after looking at the tuition, all of you agreed it was too much.
“what are we going to do?” you asked as he mentioned long distance. you knew you could do long distance but that was more work for a relationship that wasn’t promised, “no, I don’t think that would work.”
Ryou gave you a look, he sensed what you were going to tell him. taking a break or worse, completely breaking up.
“our only choice is breaking up.”
you muttered the words he feared the most. he didn’t want to break up with you but you had dreams in Hokkaido and his baseball dreams relied in Osaka.
“are you serious?” he asked. you gave him a dumbfounded look, “I told you since the beginning of our third year all my choices and all the schools I took entrance exams for. it’s your fault for not telling me you were attending Osaka.”
Ryou scoffed, “my fault?” he asked rhetorically, “how is this all my fault?” you rubbed your temples, “I just told you why. I told you my choices and you didn’t tell me any of yours. how were we supposed to coordinate schools when you didn’t tell me?”
Ryou knew you were right but his damn pride didn’t want him to lose the argument, “you could’ve asked, you know?” you let out a sarcastic laugh, “we’re not children, Kominato!” shit, you were pissed. Ryou knew that you when you called him by his last name, you were serious.
“you knew this was going to come up and if you knew that you weren’t giving Hokkaido an option, I wouldn’t have applied. I’m not the one at fault here, you are.”
you wanted to cry, you really did, but when it came down to it, you realized how ridiculous it was to feel upset about this. it wasn’t your fault and you weren’t going to cry about a relationship that Ryousuke, in a sense, threw away.
“so this is it? we’re done?”
“you’re attending Osaka and I’m going to Hokkaido so yeah we are.”
-
moving out of Seidou and instantly going to Hokkaido was a relief in one hand but stress in another. both you and Fujiwara found a cheap apartment in the Hokkaido area and moved in only a few weeks after graduating.
after the break up with Ryou, you returned all of his things except his baseball sweater. not really out of memories but because the sweater was extremely comfortable and that was the only Seidou merch you kept.
Fujiwara wanted nothing more than you kick Ryou’s ass after finding out what happened but you realized that everything happened for a reason and there was no point in dwelling on a relationship that Ryou seemingly didn’t care about.
once you settled into the apartment and managed to find jobs that fit around your class schedules, you both knew it was time to get out on the town and explore Hokkaido.
“hey, there’s a baseball game tonight. want to do that?” you asked. Fujiwara thought about it, “sure, I don’t mind. as long as it doesn’t end too late. I work tomorrow morning.”
you nodded as you purchased a two front row tickets for the seven o’clock game. outside of being with Ryou, you didn’t care too much about baseball. you did find the game interesting but you didn’t actively seek to watch it. both you and Fujiwara knew going to a game only gave you a reason to leave the house and actually do something.
the both of you purchased a Hokkaido jersey as soon as you arrived to the stadium but you had completely forgotten was that Harada had gotten drafted to the team at the beginning of the summer.
“hey, I’m going to buy us some drinks before the game, once you find our seats, text me so I can go ahead and find you.”
Fujiwara nodded as you went up to one of the stands and bought the both of you coffee. being that it was already August, most days were extremely hot but today, there was a slight breeze in the air.
after ordering the coffee, you hadn’t realized you weren’t watching where you were walking and ran into someone.
“oh my god, I am so sorry!” you exclaimed. although it was your fault, you were the one who ended up on the ground, “oh Harada, I didn’t realize it was you!” you exclaimed.
Harada chuckled before giving you his hand and helping you back on your feet, “what are you doing in Hokkaido?” he asked. you scratched your head nervously, “oh, I go to university here. both Fujiwara and I just wanted to come to a game just so we wouldn’t be trapped inside the house all day.”
Harada hummed, “where are you sitting?” you showed him your ticket, “players get to have family members sit in the box seats. do you guys want to take the seats tonight?” Harada asked.
you immediately denied, “no we couldn’t. we wouldn’t even know how to repay you.” Harada chuckled, “no need to repay me. it’s my pleasure hosting you.” your face immediately went warm as you ultimately agreed on taking his seats.
once you texted Fujiwara and told her everything with Harada, she couldn’t help but smack you on the arm, “I haven’t seen you with a smile like that since you were still with Ryou.” you didn’t say anything back but you knew she was right.
the seats that Harada had given you were amazing. you were able to see everything from the top and Harada even gave you a discreet wink all the way from the bottom before the game started.
from the game that Seidou had against Inashiro, you never remembered Harada being so confident but you guessed personalities changed when it came to on and off the field.
halfway through the game, someone came in with plates of food, “box members get dinner on the behalf of Hokkaido players.” was all the person said before setting the plates down on the counter and leaving.
you grabbed the small note that was on the tray as Fujiwara grabbed her plate and ran back to the seat to continue watching the game.
“I figured a way you could repay me. here’s my number, call me so I can properly take you out.”
you hid the paper in your pocket, deciding not to show Fujiwara until the game was over. you put his number into your cell before grabbing your plate of food and sitting back down.
“harada❤︎”
-
once you finally fessed up to Fujiwara about Harada giving you his number, it was the same day Harada planned on taking you out. he picked a cute restaurant in a neighboring city and was on his way to pick you up.
Fujiwara didn’t take no for an answer and put you in some of the cutest clothes she owned. it was a black skirt that reached your knees, a plain white blouse, and left you to do your own hair.
“you look great! are you excited?”
you gave her a nervous smile, “I’m fucking nervous! I’m going on a date with Hokkaido’s catcher! do you know how many girls would kill to be in my spot?” you exclaimed. Fujiwara laughed, “yeah but you’re the one in that position so fucking be excited about it!”
you nodded as you heard a knock on your door, “I’ll answer it!” Fujiwara screamed as she ran to the door. you ran to the bathroom to make sure you looked okay before going back out.
“ah, Harada! how are you! she’ll be out in a minute. she just had to use the bathroom.”
Harada nodded as he sat down on your couch, “would you like some tea or anything?” Harada shook his head no as he gripped the flowers he brought you.
you took one final breath before leaving the bathroom and walking outside to your living room. Harada’s mouth dropped as he felt himself blushing, “you look beautiful.” you smiled as he handed you the flowers, “they’re beautiful, Harada.”
Fujiwara squealed, “if there’s any single players on your team, she has my number so you can give it to them.” Harada laughed as you set your flowers on your kitchen table.
“leave, you don’t want to be late! have fun! make sure everything is consensual!”
you felt embarrassment rush over your face at what Fujiwara said, “we will,” Harada responded before taking your hand and walking out of your apartment.
-
after a few months of dating Harada, you felt like everything was back to normal in your life. you had an amazing boyfriend, your education was going great, and Fujiwara managed to get find someone who played for Hokkaido to take her out.
Harada was everything Ryou wasn’t. Ryou tended to hide his affection in front of everyone while Harada didn’t mind showing you off to the team. you understood that Harada traveled a lot but some how, the two of you made it work.
the off season finally came and you were in your apartment with Fujiwara and her boyfriend. being that her boyfriend was few years older than the two of you, he managed to buy a few cases of beer and two bottles of wine.
“where’s Masa? he should be here by now.” you asked Daiki. he shrugged, “I think he was rearranging his apartment. at least that’s what he told me.” Daiki brushed off your comment before continuing the coversation he was having with Fujiwara.
they both knew what he was saying was true but there was more to the story than that. Harada was planning on asking you to move in with him and he was making space to make room for your things. Harada was a traditionalist and he felt it was right in his heart to ask you to move in with him before things got even more serious.
it had been a few days after that day when you were with Harada in his apartment. you were laying on top of him, adorning one of his shirts as he rubbed your sides.
“you know I love you, right?”
you nodded as you gave Harada a peck, “of course. what makes you say that?” you asked. Harada twiddled his fingers as readjusted yourself. you wrapped your legs around his waist as he huffed, “well, we’ve dating for a while and you know with my line of work, I was wondering if you wanted to move in. it would make everything a lot easier.”
you could tell how nervous Harada was, “of course. is that why Daiki told me you were rearranging your apartment a few days ago?” Harada nodded. you smiled before giving him a kiss, “we can start moving my things in tomorrow.”
Harada nodded as he seen a smirk play on your face, “we should celebrate tonight. lets call Fujiwara and Daiki and go to a club!” you asked, “but before that, we should celebrate another way first.”
Harada knew what you meant by that as you took your shirt off and pushed him back on the couch.
-
it had been a few months since that night. Ryousuke didn’t really pay attention to the news surrounding players as a lot of the news was mostly rumors. or he hoped they were rumors.
Tetsu had messaged Ryou with a video that Fujiwara had sent him. it was of all four of you singing to “I Dont Fuck With You” by Big Sean. Ryou seen how Harada was holding you as you sang to the camera. he could tell you were a bit drunk as your words were slurred a bit.
“I guess it’s time for you to move on.” was all Tetsu said in the message. there was a part of him that hoped he could rekindle what the two of you had. he didn’t believe the video and just hoped that the next time he seen you, you were as single as the day you left Seidou.
-
“Masa, Seidou is holding a gathering and they want alumni to attend. you should come with me!” you exclaimed. he gave you a look, “I don’t think it’s safe for a retired Inashiro player to attend that.”
you pouted as you wrapped your arms around his neck, “please? I want to show my fiance off!” Harada couldn’t deny your puppy eyes, “fine!” you smiled before giving him a kiss, “it’s this Friday so we could make it a trip to see our families!”
-
you arrived to Seidou and looked at the campus. it was exactly the same way you left it. you squeezed Harada’s arm as you ushered him inside the gym. you gave the person at the front door the invitation and seen all of your old schoolmates.
“Jun! Masuko! Tanba!” you exclaimed as you ran to them. they turned around in surprise as they seen you running towards them, “it’s felt like forever!” you whispered as you gave them a hug.
they returned it before pointing behind you, “uh, is he with you?” Tanba asked. you nodded, “Masatoshi? of course, why wouldn’t my fiance be here?” they all gave you a bewildered look.
“you’re engaged?” Jun screamed. you nodded happily as you them your ring. they gawked at how huge it was, “my god. congrats!” they all said awkwardly before congratulating Harada.
they all held your hand to see the ring up close, “it’s fucking huge!” Jun muttered as you laughed, “I know. he’s the best, isn’t he?” you joked as you held Harada’s hand.
“I know I’m the best.”
you felt yourself stiffen Ryou’s voice. you turned and seen Tetsu, Ryou, and Chris standing behind you. Ryou with a smirk playing on his face as Tetsu and Chris gave you smiles.
“hey guys! how are you!” you tried to say as unawkward as possible, “great, how are you?” Tetsu said, “I see the rumors about you and Harada being together are true,” Chris muttered.
you nodded as you seen your favorite running towards you, “Haruno! Yui!” you screamed pushing everyone out of the way. they tackled you into a hug as you tried to remain standing.
“you made it!” Yui screamed as she let you go, “of course. I really came here only to see the two of you!” you said as you hugged them again. they smiled as they let you go and noticed the rock on your hand.
“you’re actually engaged! that’s awesome!” Haruno exclaimed as she held your hand up to see the ring, “holy shit, it’s huge! is that him?” Yui asked as she pointed at Harada. you nodded as they brought you over to the rest of the group, “did you guys see? she’s engaged!” Yui exclaimed as she showed all the boys your hand.
you felt a blush rise as you tried to take your hand back, “we see that! that’s awesome!” Tetsu muttered as he looked at Ryou. everyone knew that you were engaged but they were all hoping that it didn’t get brought up.
“well, Fujiwara and her boyfriend Daiki should be here soon. we’re going to find a table for us to sit at. we’re here all weekend so we should all meet up if we can and have dinner tomorrow.”
they nodded as you waved them goodbye and grabbed Harada by the hand, “well, how awkward was that?” you exclaimed before the two of you let out a belting laugh.
Ryou felt his eye twitch as he watched the two of you laugh. Ryou got the confirmation he needed. you were in fact engaged and he knew he couldn’t compare to Harada. no matter how hard he tried.
“sorry bro, maybe it’s better this way.”
Ryou gave Tetsu a look before turning around to look at you. he seen you give Harada kiss before going back to talk to Yui and Haruno. maybe Tetsu was right. maybe it was better this way.
ALITA
#daiya no ace#daiya no ace x reader#daiya no ace imagine#kominato ryosuke#kominato ryosuke x reader#kominato ryosuke imagine#harada masatoshi#harada masatoshi imagine#harada masatoshi x reader#the next imagine will be bnha i promise!!
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set it off in las vegas on friday (jan 17, 2020)
i showed them my new tattoo which they LOVED, i gave them a trans flag that i wrote on, and generally just had an incredible time. read under the cut!
so my friend bribri (@sarcasticloser7 on twitter) forced me to go before her at vip because i was freaking out with all this hyperactive energy and i was like “noooo!!!” she was like “you should go so you stop freaking out” and i was like “yeaH PRoBabLy”
so when our friend nicole had walked away they turned to see me and both cody and maxx went “nick!!!”
maxx gave me just such a tight hug. that was fantastic. it pretty much overshadowed my memories of codys (first) hug and i only vaguely remember hugging zach because for once he gave me a two arm hug haha.
i went “do you guys wanna see my tattoo??” and they were all like “yeah!!” and i struggled for a moment to take off my jacket sleeve (as you can see in the video) but i told him it was a photo of him holding my hand during the haunting in february and that cole got his handwriting for the lettering in july and cody said “i just got goosebumps! that’s so sweet” and i didnt see it in person but maxx was smiling just such a big smile!! and cody looked just so touched he turned into this 🥺 emoji and gave me just such a CUTE hug. (video post)
i was rushed into photo position and i auickly said “you can give me bunny ears if you want” and cody did last second and it’s so cute. and i ALMOST forgot to give them mine and si’s letters but i gave that before i left and at the end of the video you can just see maxx and cody smiling SO BIG.
(group photo post)
so then we played heads up, and once cody was done with his turn he stood between me and bri and it was probably because he knew we wouldn’t act all weird about it but in my brain i was still like “HUHHH???”
anyways that was really fun and maxx ended up winning. people were fucking yelling at first though i didnt even like try to help fjdjdj also cody dropped his keys which was kinda funny
anyways when that was all done with it was hang out time, i went to maxx first because it seemed like there was the least amount of people around him. i told him how in the past year my life turned around because they built up my confidence so much and he said “well you SHOULD have confidence!” and praised my covers and said “and even your original music is really good” that was like a really great slap in the face because sometimes on-stream in my head it sound like he’s playing up how he feels about it for the sake of the crowd and trying not to sound like an asshole but he really just said that to my face excitedly with no one else listening. THAT was cool.
i talked to zach next, i had to tell him i did the killer in the mirror mashup and the lonely dance mashup, and also told him that i thought it was very sweet that he was checking up on me in july. i think he was feeling under the weather though :( right after he walked offstage he tweeted about how much he hated being sick on tour, i hope he feels better :(
and i definitely talked too much with cody but he definitely wanted to talk to me too. i told him the same thing i told maxx but put a little more emphasis on how much i didn’t have any confidence at all, to which he said “i’ve had moments like that too” and i told him now i have the most confidence i’ve had in a very very long time. and this time i had him take the selfie because i was shaking so much my photo with zach was blurry (woops!)
(selfies post)
and i dont remember exactly what was said to elicit this but as i was about to walk away i brought up the fan power award and how i wanted to cry reading the article and he said “i’m so glad we got that award out of anything else” and i said “you deserve it” and he said “thats all of us, you guys too”
anyways yeah i spent way too long talking with him bc they had been almost out of time and he had to fuckin speedrun the rest of the people in line signing things and taking selfies and right as he was leaving i told him to look out for something i was going to give during the set.
we went back outside, and i bought merch for myself and cole, and someone who didnt have their card and sent me money on mobile. damn! and then we stood outside for so long i was like “why am i here” i was tired and also tired of waiting.
point north was actually pretty good, kellin came out for one of their songs which i was NOT expecting in the slightest (cole was fucking shook, not emotionally prepared). belmont i wasn’t as big of a fan of and i kinda got bored but there were some people there that were super into it, there was a pit and a fair amount of crowdsurfers.
when set it off came on i wasn’t losing my mind as much as i usually am but wow my serotonin levels!!!!! it was INSTANTLY noticeable that they seemed so much happier than when i saw them in july. cody especially was smiling so much, he was having such a good time. and might i say no disrespect is SO much fucking fun live, the left-right thing is super fun. during killer in the mirror cody went on top of the crowd like he usually does and i realized that that would be a good time to give the flag to him (the stage was really tall and the space between the barrier and the stage made me nervous) but he was a little too far and he stood up past me so he didnt see it. so i kept it until catch me if you can, which is when i originally planned to give it to him because wow that song is becoming like my life mantra. he finally saw it once i unfolded it a little and gave me a “gimme a second” finger. so for the second verse he walked over and motioned to give it to him and i was too scared to throw it over the gap so someone else did, and he struggled to unfold it and read what it said during the song so he just waved it a bit and put it on his mic stand. and after the song he opened up the flag with zach and read it, and pointed at me and hit his chest/heart, and he walked up to the mic and said “this is beautiful, thank you.” he kissed it and put it over maxxs drumset 🥺
for the next song i almost fuckin CRIED, he was singing to me so much and gave me a little finger heart and of course the thought in my mind was “why, i don’t deserve this” but then i thought about the tattoo and the past year and i got so emotional i thought i was gonna cry!!! fuck!!!
(gifset post) (video of unfolding flag) (video of holding up flag) (photo)
so yeah basically i am a mess. stan set it off stream catch me if you can and fuckin trans rights babey
#set it off#set it off adventures#ok last big post about this show aldskfjas no more content#sio jan 2020
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25!!!!!!!!
okay that one i literally made bc i look like john, love just dance, and want to be loved but here we fuckin go
25. John being a just dance twitch streamer and all the boys being gay for it i mean youtubers au
so im thinking that all of them make WILDLY different content. lets start with the beta kids.
so john has a gaming channel, clearly, and he decides he wants to lose some weight in a fun way that also helps his channel, so he starts the just dance thing. other than that, he mostly plays things like minecraft, five nights at freddys, all your basic bitch stuff, along with a fair few horror games. he really likes minecraft and sims 4 though.
rose has a witchcraft channel. she practices witchcraft and makes videos about spells and sigils and crystals and all the other cool stuff that goes along with that. i dont know much about witchy stuff anymore, its been a while since i was into that stuff, so id have to do a bunch of research for her.
dave has two channels: irony channel and music channel. the ironic one is where he posts anything to do with sbahj, and just generally fucks about, does weird trends and stuff. he never shows his face on his music channel, never shares his name, and it’s all remixes, so no one hears his voice either.
jade has the most chaotic but pure channel. she does anything she feels like doing, from kids show reviews to “Look at this cool pumpkin i grew” to “heres my favourite gun”. she has no theme, and never plans to change this.
Trolls
aradia is similar to jade in chaotic energy, but she tends to stick to stuff like creepy antiques she finds, weird animal bones from the fields she just wanders about in and that kind of odd stuff. she also talks about dark conspiracy theories a bit.
tavros mostly focuses on animals; animal care, animal facts, how to spot animal illnesses, how to deal with hostile but injured animals in the wild, what to do if you see an animal you think might have rabies, all that kinda shit. theres always at least one animal in every video, whether its a ferret in his lap, a cat walking over him, a snake around his neck, a guinea pig on his shoulder, and so on.
sollux does a gaming and tech help channel. he plays any game that people claim is difficult and tends to beat them so fast people think he’s hacking. he slaves over every fnaf game to try to beat the custom night first. as for tech help, hes basically that guy who runs the channel on how to fix discontinued apple products.
i lost my fucking karkat paragraph, im furious. basic recap of what i lost: he does general content like dan howell and phil lester kinda, with a couple staple series, such as his rant series, where his followers give him a topic and he rants about it for about twenty minutes (after editing). he also does livestream versions which can sometimes last for several hours per rant.
nepeta does cosplay videos with whoever she can rope into helping her (usually terezi, vriska, equius, or feferi) plus a lot of fandom videos in general. she usually comes off really lighthearted in her videos, but she also makes a lot of important comments about fandom culture and shipping wars etc. on her second channel she does vlogs, which exposes her absolute gremlin side. these vlogs often feature things such as her climbing up a tree, getting stuck, and screaming until equius saves her.
kanaya does makeup and fashion advice videos, mostly with a vampire theme to them. occasionally she’ll do cosplay makeup too. her favourite videos to do are when her subscribers send in pictures of themselves and their closets, along with some general information on what they wont wear and all that, and she gives them advice on how to spruce up their look a little and declutter their clothes, etc. she likes feeling like shes making a difference to people.
terezi focuses on true crime mostly; cold cases, current cases, sometimes she runs through the process of solved cases. she prefers to do unsolved stuff, since it gives her the ability to talk about her own theories on it, and she does often get it right, but for particularly interesting cases she will do a video anyway. she also does a little bit on mental health and the reasons behind crimes and shit.
vriska is another kinda general youtuber. she does whatever the hell she wants, plus anything anyone says she cant do. she also lets some of nepetas fandom stuff leak into her content. no one really knows how she got so many subscribers. she also has the most merch out of all of them.
equius makes videos on whatever happens to be his current hyperfixation at that moment. hes the most inconsistent. one week hes picking apart the homosexual subtext in certain scenes of jaws, the next hes teaching you how to put together a microwave. he does a lot of lgbtq+ videos too; his most popular video is of him and nepeta and some others at pride and most peoples favourite part is nepeta racing around a small clearing with equius on her back while vriska cackles behind the camera
no one is really sure what gamzee actually does. his videos are all filmed on a phone camera and are never edited. he doesnt have an intro or an outro. sometimes it seems like he forgot to start filming until halfway through whatever he was talking about, but he never repeats the bits the camera missed. theres no theme, no clear goal, no one knows whats happening and theyre pretty sure hes high in every video. one time he posted a video that was over 48 hours of the phone just pointing at a wall, which appeared to be covered in blood just out of sight of the screen (as in you could see the edge of it but not the actual blood) and there appeared to be a hand sitting at the corner of the screen. everyone was fucking terrified for a while, but the next video posted to his account was karkat explaining that hed had a bit of a mental break and thrown a jar of jar at the wall (the “blood”) and that the hand was just a doll. hed taken out his phone to film a vent video, but promptly forgot about it, dropped it, and went to do something else. he finally remembered over two days later, posted it without thinking and called karkat. a few weeks later he started posting again like the whole thing never happened.
eridan’s content mostly focuses on harry potter and magic (which he definitely doesnt believe in because that would be ridiculous), but he makes a lot of environmental PSA videos about littering and pollution and stuff. in his fandom videos he comes across as just really excitable and doesnt seem like he cares about much else, but he really shows off his intelligence in PSA type videos. he also posts a lot of videos of him just talking about whatevers going on in his life, usually whenever he gets a new crush. his most popular video is the one he made right after seeing johns just dance streams for the first time, because he looked like he was about to cry or scream the whole time.
and feferi! her content mostly focuses on social and political issues. she talks out against “canceled”/purity culture a lot and tends to end up involved in discourse for it. shes that person in the middle of the argument whos literally only stating facts and saying that we shouldnt jump to unnecessary conclusions, but somehow ends up being accused of being jack the ripper or some shit for it. she isnt afraid to share her honest opinions and makes sure to remain as polite and level-headed as is humanly possible when responding to others.
i was gonna do the alpha kids and dancestors too and like share some plot and that kinda stuff but this is long as fuck, so we’re gonna stop here for now! feel free to request again for even more info dumping. also i just wanna say that i planned none of that gamzee stuff i had no idea what i was doing when i started that
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Interactive Introverts Richmond Summary! (Part 1 bc rambling)
Ok. My experience and a general summary. I'm gonna do my best I couldn't believe it was happening, before, after, or during it, and now I can't believe it happened. So.
I didn't get ready way too early this time! I loved my outfit it was so cute, and I drew whiskers on my wrist and my cousin did too :). I went over to my cousin's, and my aunt drove us to my uncle's office in Richmond. He took us to II it was so awesome of him. I was flipping out.
We got there and took pics with the signs and stuff I was vibrating and bouncing and shit I was so excited. We lined up and got in doors opened at six and it was a lot of little short lines so we got in really quickly. Immediately I wanted to go downstairs for merch.
We got in the merch line and like really like ahead in the line I was so proud of getting there so fast.
And I saw the like stand up thing background for the m&g?????? So I was like um wtf are they actually right there like thirty feet away from me? So I was watching it and had my phone ready to video. I SAW PHIL LESTER WITH MY OWN EYES LEAN FORWARD AND HUG SOMEONE. y'all you don't understand his hair is SO. BLACK. like it actually shocked me how black it was I guess it doesn't translate.
But anyway they had the last few people do the m&g, and then they left and Dan waved really quick and we all cheered and I GOT A VIDEO OF THEM AKFNDJSFBWJD.
Also, fan project tonight super cute just a pic of Virginia that said "VA LOVES YOU" I didn't know about it until I got there, but someone handed me a stack and asked me to pass them out and I was like um hell yes so I did that.
Anyway, we moved forward in the merch line and yo the line got so long I was so happy we went straight there omg. The merch setup was like really good! Very efficient they had a long table and everything up with prices and stuff it was so well set up and the guy who helped me was super nice.
I got both short sleeved shirts and the long sleeved shirt, as well as a hat and a poster, and my cousin got the hoodie, a poster, and the marble shirt. Cute as hell! It went really smoothly and quickly it was awesome and we just got right through.
We went to the bathroom and it had a lil ledge so we folded and organized our stuff and then went to the bathroom. Tbh the bathrooms there were REALLY nice, and not crowded at all when I went! The theatre itself was so nice you guys like I can't even believe how nice it was it was so fancy like pretty carpeted soft stairs and everything was so ornate and detailed and pretty. Just omg.
Anyway! Then we went and stood by the front doors for a bit and I handed out signs (if you saw me in the lacy white shirt and black shorts with short blond hair aye!). We sat in balconey D, so we went up (a LOT of stairs) and found our seats!
Seriously I can't overstate how gorgeous and amazing this theatre was so fancy with super soft seats and good room like it was so pretty and it had a ton of like Egyptian stuff on the walls omg it was so cool. Y'all. The set was GORGEOUS. Like the lights and the background and just. Wow. I felt so close even though we were the highest up, because everything was very stacked. We really weren't that far away even though we were towards the back like I could see the stage really well.
The set is so gorgeous wow. And I just jammed to all the songs on the preshow playlist it was so amazing I couldn't believe it was real.
Also Dan's Siri came on like twice and was like hi there's really nice merch downstairs and Dan left me to look at memes and stuff, and told us not to film bc iPads are bad lmao. (I filmed anyway don't arrest me).
Everyone FLIPPED SHIT when Welcome To The Black Parade came on oh my god it was so loud and amazing. The lights dimmed and off we went.
They opened with the really adorable video being projected omg my heart and then they rode in dramatically with their steam and everyone LOST THEIR SHIT it was amazing the crowd was so loud all night.
Phil read the Richmond Wikipedia page apparently (wow, nerd) lmao and talked about the rat basketball team. They literally mentioned the rat basketball team like at least six times throughout the show tonight y'all I'm.
Dan said shooketh at something at the beginning and I don't remember what it was but like djfndjsdbrb. Also he did the Naruto run the first time he ran off stage, and we all sCREAMED.
They did a smol duet of A Whole New World which I now know was inspired by the venue - it was so great though and Dan was like that's not what you want trust me it would start off good but it would quickly become horrible. It sounded really good though like I love them they should sing more.
I hadn't seen any spoilers about the beginning! They talked about what an introvert is and asked the introverts and extroverts in the room to cheer sjfbwjsj.
Dan had a six second challenge to pretend to be a llama sitnfndntkejr he pranced and did a noise we all DIED and then he was like "-NO!" it was hilarious sjfndjsnebd.
The segment about what they weren't gonna do had me shook I nearly died. "Please be gentle with the handcuffs; I have sensitive skin" IM DEAD.
Also when they went to walk up and pretend to strip and then they RIPPED OFF THEIR SHIRTS TO REVEAL IDENTICAL SHIRTS UNDERNEATH YOURE FUCKING KIDDING ME WHAT THE FUCK.
We were all really sad about the puppies so Phil said we'd get to see more puppies later in the show and we all screamed and Dan said if you're gonna promise puppies you better follow through.
When they offered to let people touch their hair I was like sjgbdjdbdjabfsn. Pastel personas skgbsjfkekfje??? They put on flower crowns and brought stuffed animals up to the front of the stage wow my heart.
They were like we're not gonna bring up a whole bunch of other YouTubers - because we have no friends and no one replied to our messages.
I can't remember for shit, but the whole beginning segment was just amazing. When they finished talking about how the show was interactive they were like "so that's why now we're going to make one of you stand up at random!!!!!!!" And they shined all the lights up and for a second it was chaos and then they were like kidding kidding we're just kidding and Phil was like your faces were priceless and Dan was like okay you can tell who the introverts and extroverts are the introverts are like crawling into a ball in their seats like "DONT PICK ME" I've never seen 3000 people curl up into a ball before. It was terrifying but also amazing!
Truth bombs! Honestly, I thought they were gonna do all the ones from the website, but they only did one each.
Phil's torture confession would be being bathed in cheese (Dan talked about if that included scrubbing, or if it included scrubbing under flaps y'all I was so done oh my god), but other options were mouth noises in headphones in his ears (to which Dan then did HORRIBLE and horribly loud mouth noises into his mic oh my god it was the worst thing my ears have ever heard ajtbcjejgsj *vomits* he said "not the asmr you came to hear, sorry") and ??? (Help I forgot)
Dan dreams about Nick Jonas in a fursuit at night ("the two things I lease wanted to hear right now, combined), but other options were a dark abyss ("no that's what I see when I look in the mirror") and a one direction reunion.
They would die from "Bees?" But other options were Dan falling out of the gaming chair and taking Phil down with him, and burning down the flat after setting a fire during a baking video gone horribly wrong (both of the runner ups they said were extremely realistic and plausible and they were like are you guys surprised we aren't dead yet we were all like yah). Dan was like where are the bees going to come from???? THAT FLAP keep you eyes on it.
We're real people with free will so you can't just make us do whatever you want, BUT we have made a simulation with a tiny Dan and Phil where you choose what they would do in completely normal, everyday situations that we experience in real life. Remember, tiny Dan and Phil still have emotions and can feel shame and guilt, so this is our test to see if you are responsible enough to be in control during this show - please do what you would actually want us to do if you were controlling us in real life.
Simulation! They have been working on this since they were FETUSES. Not babies, fetuses they were up in their mom's bellies with laptops editing this, and they spent billions of pounds and thousands of Richmond dollars (idk why they said Richmond dollars so many times during the show but sjtbsjdjd it was cute) on it.
Phil first he went to Barstucks (the simulations didn't want to get sued) and got a unicorn death frappe, with lots of sugar so he was vibrating, and he accidentally tweeted a picture of him in his underwear. Shirtless Satan appears and we all cheered for Satan they were concerned and Phil sold his soul to Satan to take the pic down bc he dropped his phone in his drink lmao. SATAN TAKES HIM TO HELL AND THERES DEMON DAN AND HE HAS A POTATO AND HE POTATO PRESSES PHIL TO DEATH FOR ETERNITY. then Phil was like "I still remember the feeling of a wet potato being pressed to my back" I was like sjbsjsjdsj ew.
Dan talked to the furry in the park and went to a furry rave (didn't show him the good Shiba Inu memes he had) and did body shots off of an otter and entered the ladydoor and slipped on the floor and died in his slothbear fursuit. Lmao rip (I'd already heard that ending though). Dan said the show was officially demonitized, and also said "there was an attempt" after people cheered for the good option lmao.
At the end they were like what a waste of all our billions of dollars and all the time spent editing as fetuses.
At the end of the simulation Phil talked about it being like a mob mentality and Dan compared it to fandoms and how if you like something and everyone else seems to have the same reason for liking it or whatever, the people who it especially means some thing to, their voices can get lost. And that's what this show is all about giving the people what they want and getting all the voices and stuff. Fandoms are often seen as one collective unit but you can't expect them all to want the same thing because they're all made up of very different individuals. Etc. It was good.
Our collective name was Kevin. We did a coordinated clap ("the asmr you do want to hear") it was the coolest fucking thing ever ajrnejfnej to build the hive mind. Then we chose a breed of dog for them to get "they just want us to get a dog Phil that's all they want" and Phil led it he was like I think I can get everyone to think the same thing, and we chose Fluffy the very terrifying Chihuahua it was so cool how they did it and that was the one I got so yay! They asked who didn't get fluffy and then they were like "that's okay that just means you aren't part of Kevin... YET." And then they just kept saying how we needed to get inside Kevin and stuff it was like okay wow.
Then we had the WHATS UNDER DANS BED. First of all that box is fucking hilarious, and I think Dan mentioned Phil just wanting an excuse to use props lmao. They explained it and then Phil brought out the audience participation balls "Phil has three balls." Okay. But they really emphasized how if you didn't want it you could just throw it to someone who did like they were so nice and understanding about it and when the music stopped Phil asked and made sure everyone who had one wanted it :). Also they were like keep the answers like amazingphil channel okay keep it PG. But it was actually a really cool concept and the lights went rainbow when they were throwing them around, which I LOVED! The three answers were an anthill but the ants are tiny dogs, a fursuit made of maltesers, and "I think he's trolling us and it's empty"/nothing. Y'all Phil was like has anyone seen a key under their seat and Dan was like wait what are we talking about wait no no I have the key akfnfjejd. They opened it, got the silver tube, opened that and got the scroll, and then they were like this has been in the tube in the locked box on the stage the whole time how could it possibly say what three random members of the audience said, and then they SLOWLY UNROLLED IT AND IT SAID TINY DOG ANTHILL, FURSUIT, AND NOTHING YALL I WAS SHOOK OUT OF MY MIND LIKE THE ONLY THING THAT COULD HAVE MADE THE SHOW WAS MAGIC AND THEY JUST DID THAT OH MY GOD. I'm still shook about it.
Then Phil took the banner and tore it up into like three or four big pieces and was like okay guys tear it up and pass it around tear and share I was so shook I was like oh my god I want a piece of that banner but obviously I was balconey, so they were ripping off pieces and passing it around and Dan and Phil were like omg it's like the walking dead down there "oh my gosh... That is.. violent." I was so shook that they did that like that was so nice and good like snejdbdabfbo.
Survey! Dan dabbed when he said statistics and Phil was like don't dab to statistics and Dan dabbed again and was like math *dab* there was so much unnecessary dabbing it was wow. Phil likes to use props and costumes so the brought out the glasses and clipboards YALL THEM IN GLASSES IN REAL LIFE 😭. Phil read the options for the audience participation one really dramatically and Dan was like "Phil wrote all the answers to these questions obviously" to which Phil replied "I wanted to make them spicy." 68% like audience participation, sixty some feel like they really know Dan and Phil (8% said who are Dan and Phil and Dan was like where do you think you are Shrek the musical? It was so good. I think Phil said maybe that's the parents. Incredible.) (Unnecessary third option bc Phil wanted to see what would happen - it used the middle screen) 40% like the sims the best, but pinof had 36%. Ditl had 16%, and baking and crafts both had four. They ROASTED the four percent who love crafts lmao it was great. (They spent the whole tour budget on the pie chart for the video series lmao it was FANCY) Sixty percent of people whlant Dan and Phil to give the people what Dan and Phil want, so I was really proud of us and Dan seemed surprised and happy about it he said Augusta was like ninty percent what the people want lmao.
ONE FINAL QUESTION WE ASKED YOU DAN OR PHIL BUT THATS TOO EASY NO WE ASKED YOU WHO WOULD YOU SACRIFICE BUT DAN NO ONES REALLY GOING TO BE SACRIFICED RIGHT THIS IS JUST A QUESTION ON A SURVEY IN A STAGE SHOW "I CAN SAY WHATEVER I WANT ABOUT DAN AND PHIL THERE ARE NO CONSEQUENCES... RIGHT?"
SUPER DRAMATIC SACRIFICE DAN OR PHIL "YOU MIGHT SAY I CANT CHOOSE TOO BAD THE WORLD IS FULL OF HARD DECISIONS ONE OF US WILL BE STRAPPED TO THIS WHEEL" PHIL SAID "ONE OF US IS GOING TO BE PUT IN MORTAL DANGER RIGHT NOW" AND THEN THEY BOTH JUMPED ONTO THE PLATFORM WITH THE WHEEL AND RODE IT BACKWARDS AND THEN INTERMISSION HOLY FUCKING SHIT THEYRE SO DRAMATIC AND EXTRA OH MY GOD IT WAS INCREDIBLE.
I'm forgetting so much but I'm gonna do this in two parts. Intermission seemed to come so quickly! It was at almost eight forty. Intermission was cool I stood up and stretched my legs bc as soon as I sat down my left leg fell asleep and it's still fucked up the. Some more jams though, and the last song they play was The Final Countdown lmao.
Quick note they are both so beautiful ??? Like?? I couldn't stop staring at their fucking legs oh my god and Dan's knees with his ripped jeans help. Also, I was mesmerised by the way Phil walks? And the way he runs and skips and does little jumps and shit? Like it's actually really graceful his legs are So Long and I'm just obsessed with watching him walk around omg. In summary - Legs ™
Edit: I totally forgot about the airhorn during Truth Bombs ajgbfjrnfsiej it was WILD Phil kept playing with it and pressing buttons to make noises before we even started doing Dan's, and Dan was like omg stop but we were all cheering because obviously it was amazing and Dan was like don't cheer when he does that you're encouraging him and we just cheered louder. (Phil also stroked the airhorn remote - the number of times some variation of the word stroke was said tonight..... So much)
At some point during the beginning they talked about why everyone loves the sims bc you can make people and make them do whatever you want and Phil was like like put a hundred sims in a swimming pool and remove the ladders and watch them drown slowly and I used to do that a lot as a kid does that say something and Dan was like that would explain a lot actually (I swear to God he said that phrase about Phil like three or four times throughout the show like wow). And Phil was like you could also make them woohoo with a skeleton or an alien and HE THRUSTED TO EMPHASIZE HIS POINT I WAS LIKE JESUS FUCK STOP PLEASE.
#richmond ii#interactive introverts#dan and phil#dnp#ii#ii spoilers#interactive introverts spoilers#dan howell#amazingphil#july 12th 2018#altria theater#future#probably edit this
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perso-rant underneath and at first i intended it to be more light hearted but welp cant dive into myself without digging the bad stuff so just ignore this as rambling.
(idk if the cut works on mobile so as usual blacklist #ichapersonal to skip it , its quite long)
its night and im noisy and all but yknow part of the reason m/lb is such a healing show for me and i rewatch it every couple of days?
i cry everytime M.arinette's family is on screen pretty badly bc i get so envious all the time. i hate my shitty family (and often can relate to A.drien's ressentment) so just seeing such a /healthy/ family being often shown litterally brings me to tears. im like C.hat in the animan episode when he stares at the family picture with a sweet smile (another detail that stupidly make me cry who allowed th i s)
like. i dont relate to A.drien's relation to his family but some of the emotional effects is often a moment of "welp. mood." and being kinda sad /for him/ even if i can feel it for myself too. but then with M.arinette's family everytime they get to be on screen i realize how happy this sort of dynamic makes me and it makes me /so envious/.
like my mom is an artist and an excellent cook but she always barred those interests from me bc it was /hers/ and it was for /her ego/ and this attitude just killed every curiosity i had and remplaced it with a complete unability to care.
i used to bake as a kid but my mom was always shutting down everything i was doing, and if i was asking for help or recieps she would just tell le "it's a secret just watch " and never letting me know tf she was doing so i stopped lmao. everytime ive tried meals since it was only for myself and with a hard mocking from family and mom saying she had a better recieps and i should just let her do so i dont even try it often. (moreeven now that the kitchen is opened to the living room and they're super judgemental when im in it)
i was messing with drawings and paints in her workshop when i was a kid but she would always point out flaws and take my tools to correct it without telling nor showing me how and it killed it, it took me until my 14yo to start doing mindless doodles and then my breakdown when i was about 20 to seriously try back to draw and do art and try different tools (until my right hand made it impossible for me to hold a tool and the failure still feels yknow)
i wanted to sew things and make clothes (at the time for my dolls) but my mom was never letting me touch the tools (that we HAD since not only she made clothes but her mom actually had a fabrique shop. like. right next door. i think it became part of my mom's trauma hating her mom and refusing us to connect with her, more so with what happened when i was 7 and we lost contact with them but still, the damn irony. and i cant remember if my grandma ever let me close her sewing material but i was a damn kid after all) so this is another thing i didnt pursue
i wanted to pick up music (piano mostly) bc my uncle is a musician but my parents never wanted to invest in that because they already gave a piano to my sister (that i wasnt allowed to use) so ye that was dropped lmao
and i started to write when i was about 11 and it was that /one thing/ i didnt need help for from anyone, completely self taught, with my own ways and tools, and my parents were always dismissive of it, never listening to me, always telling me it wasnt important, that i should focus on something else, and after other circumstances that added to that i dropped writting around my 17/18yo and it had been painful to even try to write again since.(i came back to writing around my 20yo a bit before my breakdown but after it happened it started to die out and i felt exhausted and stopped after a few months and since then i've never been able to pick up writing again ay.)
(and im not touching the obsessive elements bc like- the fact she does it for her crush makes it different, but the sort of things she does? taking pictures and putting them everywhere in her room when she hyperfixates, making overcomplicated schedules and such? i litteraly do that with fiction. i made a freaking timeline for this show. i am currently working on organizing codex from d.a and an approval guide for christ sake. and im not talking about my multiple fandom shrines in my room and the fact i legit have one for m/lb made from pictures found on merchs.
or also the fact i have a lot of passions i'd love to share and seeing M. play video games with her dad for exemple makes me so bitter when all i get is backhanded insults from my parents when i bring it up.)
So sometimes i see M. and part of me is just in awe, loving everything about her. the other part of me tho... i feel... a bit robbed? like she's such a creative kid, she's incredible and she inspires me everyday, and i cant help but think how i would have adored her when i was a kid. (im not even kidding, as a kid i requested my mom a costume of black cat for h.alloween and a l.adybug costume for the carnaval. i have pictures of that at my dad's place sadly it kills me. also my room when i was a kid used to be covered with l.adybug stickers like. HELL my mom doesnt care about my interests but last year she bought me a M/LB winter callendar (bc its been years i was mentioning i wanted one, a selfish whim but oh well) and i had a huge double take bc i was certain she didnt remember me talking about this show- and she did not. when i asked her why, she legit told me "because she reminded me of you as a kid with your pigtails your obsession for l.adybugs". like!! i cant even stress how kid!me would have adored this show and especially LB./M.) (the pigtails too this time i have proofs around there i used to carry them all the time until i was bullied for it at school. (bullying at school instead of good friends also adds to the difference in question tbh lmao))
there is something so... weird into seeing the parts of yourself that you cut yourself from in a character, and see that the main difference is because of how the family (and bullies) treated those elements so drastically differently.
my family was always neglectful but differently than A.. the things i relate to with him is how he specifically still holds on hope that his father will do better at least just for one day and his reaction when he's left down saying he's just used to it. and like normal, not every kind of abuse are the same and all but i still relate enough to feel sad.
but M. is always a whiplash of feelings like i could have been this sort of girl in a better environment.
at 13/14yo she was already making stuff up, baking, designing clothes, doing art, she was doing so many things, even forgetting the superhero part. she was being happy being a creator at her pace and with encouragement. at 13/14yo i was starting to show concerning signs of d.epression because i was trying to handle my parents's divorces and the multiple trials that followed that /i/ had to handle by finding middle grounds, allowing some of my father's blackmail to avoid worse, and by litterally having to collect infos from mails everytime to prove against some of his arguments to the judges. and my sister refusing to talk to us for a year, which caused us basically to feel very bad thinking of the eldest sister who ran away from home, and having to handle my father's harrasment and emotional abuse of constantly belittling me (fuck this was the age he legit told me i would probably end up a p.rostitute so ye!!! fuck that!!!) andd the fact my mom was also falling apart from all of it on me and i was always supposed to cheer her up while i was having a hard time in a new school and new environment away from the very few friends i had and again feeling abandonned by my sister which freaking sucks after already had suffered that from our eldest one.
but M. makes me cry every. goddam. rewatch. its like maybe the ultimate wish fufilling story of just how i would have loved my family to be. of how i think i could have turned up.
and that realization hits so badly everytime.
there's a thing with my hyperfixations where i'll always find a way to tie it back to my traumas. i dont know if im pulling straws, or if the things are there. for having watched m.lb when it came out unfazed and only got hit with that realization upon rewatching- i feel it was more me realizing "there is something there that is touching me more than before" and having an introspection to get it.
and i think the difference is that- before my breakdown the characters and stories i related to where the eternal optimistic-yet-damaged "never give up!" type of characters. When things started to go downhill to my breakdown and since then the fictions that talked to me the most were all dealing with guilt coming from toxic environment that werent your fault per se but you pierceved that way. my way to relate were to characters who felt deeply connected to their guilt (peak being c.loud of f.f7 that even topped it with the deadly skin disease making him lose will to live (because ye that happened. still hate to watch out for that so ye), and memories issues, you would have told me at 13yo when i first watched that movie that this would be what i would relate to him about 7 years later i would have laughed at your face.), which translated with pushing people away and self destructing habits.
and i know i watched m.lb the first time around that time, when i was 20/21. and that may be why i didnt feel that. that my concerns were too elsewhere to realize that. That i was too focalized on how i felt like i failed by suddenly breaking under the pressure, having all the things i've kept burried kicking me out at once, and that i couldnt afford to be a burden to anyone. and it translated with me loving characters like that because in most cases their friends ended up reminding them of what was important - and sometimes just getting frustrated about your fav being as dumb as it forces you to pull yourself back together lmao. not always working but it was there.
now im 23. i cut ties with my father for about 3/4 years now, with all the shitty things that ensued out of the last trial where he sued me and his still-happening harrasment (sometimes silly sometimes scary). My mom and step dad are suffocating me more and more everyday. my health had become so disastrous i cant even manage to go school or find a job. And more than ever im frustrated and angry.
and i think it may be a shown of recovery? perhaps linked to therapy? of while i still have guilt of falling apart- /they/ are the reason i fell apart. and I'm yet to have proper apologizes for it. i grew furious at my family. of how much i feel robbed.
lately im so angry at everything i lost, was taken of, stolen childhood all of that- because of my parents, mainly. (hell even the bullying at school - in primary school it apparently started bc of gossips about why my eldest sister ran away from home, and in middle school it was first bc my parents insisted on sending me to private school where i was an outcast. which then had me truly embrassing the outcast persona that had made it impossible for me to be at peace in the two others middle schools i went to. highschool saved my social life tbh).
i think it's therapy and recovery that is making me shift the blame and feel so angry at them. so bitter. and suddenly i see in an innocent kid show a "what could have been". same starting personality, different people to channel this.
and this is. frustrating.
but it makes me love it even more. idk if its driving anything else than ressentment but at least for the time of an episode I'm in a bubble of a.lternative universe where i can forget about my life and feel satisfied at once.
like finding a piece of myself that i deliberately broke and burried to never think about it again, and realize far later how it missed to the whole, and how damaged this piece is now, but still is.
and there is something incredibly healing about that. i would never have thought there would be this much healing out of this anger and yet satisfaction. what a strange feeling.
fiction is funny that way. the things people can get out of it to deal with their own psyche are so different one person to the next.
it's just so weird for me to go from "i relate to the horrors this character went through" to "and fuck those horrors. let me think about what could have been if this didnt happen."
even moreso knowing i had this piece of fiction before and didnt approach it that way. there's a time and a mindset for everything. apparently now was the best mindset for me huh
.......
so ye apparently i cant like something like a normal person and have to go on about how it connects to my deeply rooted traumas lmao.
anyway it's been eating me up for weeks now and it's 4:45am i have absolutly no impulse holding me back. if you sat through this piece of work im sorry. just needed it to get it out of my chest.
i'll go back to hugging my cheap-yet-lifesaving c.laire's l.adybug pillow now
good night o/
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last night i had another gvf dream
and it was wild as usual but like. ended really cool still.
i was at a concert of theirs but it was like, at a tiny tiny venue, and it had this weird Energy, like a small highschool’s auditorium/smalltown theater or something. there werent any fancy lights or anything, it was really like. dimly lit, and brown. wood paneling.
there was a white plastic table set up off to the side of the room, and it had a not-very-mass-produced-looking album of theirs on it, but it wasn’t FTF, i dont remember what it was called, but the other stuff of the merch table wasnt merch of theirs for some reason? it was stuff from some other bands. maybe it was supposed to be some people they were with? but there were like seven other bands’ stuff, but nobody else seemed like they were going to be playing. so idk. and there were a bunch of people in the crowd who were older guys and they looked all like. not thrilled to be there. we were sitting in little metal folding chairs btw, all lined up in rows.
so we’re all sitting around waiting, there are a few other people who seem actually like they want to be there like i do, but we dpnt seem to be the majority.
the little stage lights flicker on and a few of us are like woo!!
the aforementioned fuckers loudly boo, then settle a little bit, and a version of the boys as what feels like them from a few years ago, maybe a little before they Made It, file out onto the stage. so thinking back now as im writing this, the small highschool/smalltown theater setting is actually clicking a bit? hm
josh seems a little reserved, but grabs his mic and asks us how we’re doing. the hall again is super tiny so i dont need to yell, but i do raise my voice a little bit to say “happy to see you all!” and the other people who arent assholes all clap and make it clear we’re in agreement, and josh and jake both smile and it looked so fuckin sweet. danny and sammy were kindof nervously looking at eachother and it was clear they all weren’t happy with the booing they recieved before they even came from behind the curtains. who could blame them.
jake motions to sammy and danny in a come on, we can do this! kind of way, he bumps his shoulder into sammy’s and sammy smiles and danny looks like he’s at least trying to. josh introduces a song (that i can’t remember unfortunately) but the heckling fuckers start in on him, but he just talks louder, and i’m frantically giving them 👍 &👌’s and you could see danny counting them in, the song starts
they sound pretty good but you can hear the uneasiness in their playing, and the idiot old men just start loudly bashing on them and josh looks fucking panicked but hes trying to sing, and i’ve never actually felt rage in a dream before until now. sammy fumbles his bassline and there’s roaring laughter and the girl next to me holds my arm because she must know how much i want to punch some fuckers.
danny suddenly just drops his sticks and tears off the side of the stage behind the curtains, sammy quickly following, jake looks directly at my group of people and mouths I’m Sorry, before unplugging his guitar and quickly walking offstage with a still pretty horrified looking josh in tow.
i started in on all the horrible old guys and telling them exactly how shitty they are and they’re all saying how shitty the band is and that they can’t play well live and that they should just give up because they’re “never gonna be zeppelin anyway!” and i’m like fuck you, get the fuck out of here if you dont like the band, etc, and they’re all laughing at me for being “so sensitive”
and i’m like yknow what fuck this, i start singing the lyrics to edge of darkness as loud as i can and the actually nice people start doing it with me, we’re all having a great time, shuffling up closer to the stage and away from the old guys,
and they get all mad about it amd start filing out of the room covering their ears, and as they’re doing it, i see josh peek out of the curtains, and he grins huge and slips back behind the curtains, and a few moments later they all scramble back out onto the stage and danny’s back on his drums in a heartbeat, sammy and jake plug back in and they all pick up playing along with us, josh hops off the stage and comes over to us with the mic and starts singing with us and we finish the song and everyone is smiling and all the boys look so relieved , i see sammy and danny exchange a high five and jake comes over and sits on the edge of the stage, and he pats my shoulder and i smile at him and say “that was great”
and then, unfortunately, i woke up. but it really was great. i’m still all smiley from it it’s great.
have i said it was great enough yet
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I have a prime sub but it’s to karl… who never streams :’((( I miss karl he should stream more. I have literally never been gifted a sub and a friend of mine has been gifted so many like, george, ranboo you name it. 3 hours after I started typing this I got gifted a punz sub lets gooo. gonna be watching his mcc ad and we’ll see about the ads
so true I 100% agree. cheating is always morally correct. “academic integrity” like okay uni whatever you say it’s literally has no weight if you’re studying to pass an exam instead of actually learning. we should be studying to learn not pass an exam. yeah exactly!! knowledge shouldn’t cost this much.
lmaooo trueee and also moood. (about the antisocial/awkward stuff I feel like to didnt make sense just like that what I was referring to with the next sentence starting with “like”) like I feel bad about feeling toxic about the twitter updates account thing because like I’ve been a person from the twitter updates account but like I’m not toxic for no reason afterwards. yeah it’s 100% so frustrating!! like a while ago I remember seeing “oh I’m not sending dts on dream’s behalf I’m sending them on mine” like huh???? do you not see the problem with that??? ughhh I get you tho I was annoyed with the kaceytron stream as well. I didn’t watch it tho like I watched a bit and was like fuck this then left. yeah I also hate it when he goes on streams of people who actively talk shit about him like :/// lowkey I feel like I’m just a bit too defensive of him sometimes because of all the unnecessary shit he gets from so so many people but at least I recognise that ig. I swear tho, his twitter stans get him in wayy more shit than he does. like that one account that counted the days made me so mad. but yeah it is kind of the same stuff. like I try not to cause I know it’s the same but like when I do it, it feels justified and not just being shitty for no reason but take away all that and it is really the same. like not to be a gatekeeper buuuuut. I’m very good at ignoring it all tho
that’s really cool but also spanish as a requirement in uni (/college idk)??? never heard of that. oh dang that’s cool I’ve always wanted to know more languages. language and the way people use it and like communication in general has always been so interesting to me. I want to say something about like my strong use of “like” now cause I’m noticing it. yeah exactly, the way people communicate online is so interesting!
tubbo should start war with foolish about the beets. that would be funny I think. and amazing lore. cause like not all lore has to be all high production. like I love hugh production lore, I love funny, silly lore, I love “semi” lore I’d enjoy it all. just log onto the smp and like idk do literally anything I will count it as lore. everything that has ever happened on the smp is canon to me. tubbo could literally just like nuke someone and start a whole new storyline. he should nuke the prison. I would say nuke foolish’s summer home over the beets but I’d be too sad about that and it’s a bit of an overreaction. there is much potential and I love tubbos character. also ranboo?? he just said that enderwalk was c!ranboo with all his memories and just like dipped and went to the uk. I do get that they’re all very busy tho and it can be difficult to find the time and all that I haven’t watched much of the bear smp but it looks cool and I may get into it at some point. I feel like I just don’t have any time these days tho
he didn’t drop off the face of the earth!! he did a 5 hour long merch vc. I am australian 😔✌️so I was asleep for half of it but it was nice just listening to it when I woke up. sapanp singing was my favourite bit. like I listened to some of those songs afterwards cause I liked them but it just wasn’t the same😔😔
I feel bad for replying so late tho so sorry about that I just felt very not social all day but I do like that with anon I can kinda just come and go and it’s chill
Yooooo congrats on the gifted punz sub! Yeah I seem to have bad luck with gifted subs, random chance I’ve only gotten sapnap, the fundy gifted was a gift from a friend
The best knowledge is free anyways. Also uni/college always tries to guilt you like who are you the catholic church fuck off. Bruh I’m paying for your services you should be treating me good I’m basically a glorified customer
Bro you where a twitter updates account?? Props to you I am at all times in the worst position to know stuff. Unless I am actively live blogging I have 0 what’s going on. I’m always years late to new informations like I’ll check my phone and realize that I missed a whole lore stream. Also on twitter you can’t even send dts right??? Like here you can actually say the words death die & kill but on twitter you have to censor yourself. “Die” funny, a little threatening but ultimately can be ignored. “d13” hilarious not at all threatening?? Wait this makes it seme like I am cool with death threats I’m not but I’ve gotten a fair share and seen other people get them and they’re always funny to me. Telling someone to die isn’t funny but being told to die is very funny if that clarifies anything. I thinknI watched a lot of the kaceytron stream (however I watched it through a dream fan streaming the stream so she didn’t get any views/money) and the whole thing was extremely upsetting. I can be defensive of him too, not so much for him but more for me. I know he can probably handle most of it but how dare people insult stuff I like. It’s less defending his honor and more how dare people disrespect me through disrespecting things I like. Plus if it ever is too much for dream I know his friends will come in clutch. Bbh saying stuff is the indicator tm that what people are saying about dream is bullshit
Does college means something different to the rest of the world? In the us it’s almost interchangeable with uni except universities can give you a doctorate while college can only get you your undergrad. It’s less that spanish is required and more that we’re required to take two years of a language and I just chose spanish. I’ve met so many people who either only speak spanish or have spanish as their first language that knowing the amount that I do has actually come in handy. Dont think about the like thing too much trust me. It’s a really good comma and indicator that you’re speaking casually but the more you notice it the more upsetting it becomes
I think the beets could be a great plot point because beets suck and I hate them!! I really do like silly lore but I hate the effect it has on the fandom. I haven’t forgiven people for writing off the l’sandburg lore. In the words of the wisest man I ever knew “everything I do on the dream smp is canon to some extent”. Accept that silly lore is canon folks!! That’s what makes the dream smp so much fun! Also high production lore can be super lame guys please this is roleplay in minecraft chill
Wait about tubbo’s lore did we ever find out who stole the one nuke? I don’t watch a lot of ranboo’s stuff but I’m very happy that enderwalk ranboo is besties with c!dream theory is coming along nicely. Uno au my beloved. No about the bear smp stuff I’d also like to get into ballsmp, more of hermit craft, and 3rd life but I’m busy too? Like college hasn’t even started and I’m already sweating. Speaking of other smps do you remember that smp that karl and quackity were invited to but never logged on? Ahoddj that was hysterical. Never gonna watch it, just think it’s funny that they were invited and decided you know what nah
The 5 hour long merch podcast my beloved!!! I had two favorite parts (other than sapnap singing) the first was when he said the alright and we all complained enough that he decided to keep streaming and the second was the final alright where he said bye and then dipped with 0 hesitation while sap & george were still in the call sjsjdk
Again no worries I’ll always be here to answer no rush for anything I’m simply vibing at all times
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This is what made me stop being a fan
“i feel like J will never do anything right in your eyes. like what would he have to do for you to say something positive about him? genuinely asking, not hating”
His life, he can do whatever he wants. But actions have consequences. So whatever he does, he has to be ready to deal with people not necessarily liking it. That’s life.
Just like K, I too started as a fan. As a quite big fan actually. As someone who did everything they could to support the band. Buy merch, buy Vy tickets, go to shows, do M&Gs, spread the word on sm…And in the beginning I was happy to do that. I admired J because he seemed like a “go-getter” who worked hard, he seemed like he cares and is involved in what goes on around him in our society and around the world (His Oscar speech, anyone? And him speaking about Ukraine, supporting the LGBT community, concern for the environment, etc). He seemed passionate about his art, he obviously is very talented. He was great on stage. And he seemed like the “underdog” and like someone who fights for the underdog. You know, all his speeches about “be who you wanna be, love who you wanna love, be different, fight for your dreams” blah blah blah. And then of course his whole “struggling artist” act, the whole “no ones making any money here”. Yeah I fell for that. “Oh poor thing. He’s so great and so talented. But he’s not making any money. Yeah, we have to support him and his art and give from our very little salaries so that he can keep doing his art.” Yes, in that sense I was one of the “sheep”. I have to laugh at it now.
Just like K said too, I also didn’t have any specific moment that made me stop being a fan. Shit just kept piling up until it hit the fan. It was just a sum of a lot of different things having happened.
It started with the London Vy really. When they set the tickets at 10,000. It was insane. Now, nothing wrong in being ambitious and dreaming big and trying to do big things and trying to reach your goals…when YOU work for it. Not someone else. Had they promoted the shit out of it themselves and had done everything they can to get the tickets sold, fine. But it was like “Oh let’s put out 10,000 tickets to make a lot of money but let the fans do all the work any pay for it all.” It’s like DT saying “Let’s build a wall and make Mexico pay for it.” It’s ridicilous. Oh and “let’s sell tickets to an event that has no date so the people who buy live tickets won’t even know if they can watch it.” I mean, seriously? Real “geniuses” at work. Smh! And even though it was clear it will never work and people kept complaining and sending in suggestions, they just ignored it all. And then they did the VIP VV (that was supposed to be a treat for those who got their tickets early) unannounced, so that most of the people missed it. So from that point on I was like “Okay, let’s see them doing some work THEMSELVES to sell their events. I’m done. Unless there is some effort coming from YOUR way, I ain’t doing shit!”. I also stopped buying multiple tickets and I stopped buying VIP. If they don’t put in any effort, why should I? They’re the ones with a company trying to sell a product, not me. I don’t go to my workplace either expecting my clients to do MY work for me while paying ME. It’s ridicilous. And if you wanna improve your product, listen to your costumers. If they tell you something IS NOT WORKING, do something about it. Don’t ignore them, block them, black list them just because they told you their opinion about your product in the hopes of helping you improve it. And for god’s sake don’t be RUDE to them and tell them they should be grateful they got anything at all even though they PAID for the product and dont tell them to fuck off if they dont like it. Well, unless you wanna lose all your costumers. In that case, go ahead.
And then there was the whole Joker thing with the used condoms and dildos and all his Joker antics. his whole “method actor” bullshit while frolicking around with models, while going rock climbing, while sending pics of himself in Joker makeup to models only to have it leaked and almost ruining things for WB. His antics were disgusting and not funny and if you claim to be a method actor and those stupid antics were needed as a part of your “method acting” then BE a method actor and don’t fuck around with young models or go rock climbing. At least stick to your story then and act like it.
Which leads to the next problem. His words and actions not matching. Being fake. Lying during interviews. “Be who you wanna be, be different”. Well, why don’t you start with yourself and take your own advice, J? If barely legal underweight girls are your thing and you can’t even be friends with anyone who doesn’t look like a model or isn’t much younger than you are, then be that. If that’s who you are, fine. So be it. If vapid models with half a brain cell are the company you prefer and want around you, it’s okay. But in that case don’t try to speak about women’s rights and about having respect for strong women or any of women’s issues. Keep your mouth shut. And don’t try to hide it and act like that’s not who you are. People are not dumb. So don’t assume they are and treat them like they are. Just because everyone around you are stupid, doesn’t mean the rest of us are, thank you very much.
Then Gucci came into the picture. Gucci this, Gucci that. Gucci, Gucci, Gucci. I AM SICK OF GUCCI! We get that you are the face of Gucci and friends with AM. But can you not shove Gucci down our throats 24/7, thank you very much. And shut up about “no one’s making any money here” and quit the “struggling artist” act. Please. When youre wearing an outfit that costs more than my whole month’s salary. Go fuck yourself. And if you raise your prices, I expect a stellar product. I expect to get my money’s worth. If I pay thousands to go to Camp MARS, I expect MARS to put some effort into it. Have activities with fans, interact with them. You have the whole weekend. You’re literally booked for the whole weekend. It’s YOUR “festival”. So do the work. And if you sell your camp packages by promising to play new music, then do that and don’t do false advertising, if you’re not intending to play new songs. And can you please tear yourself away from your freeloaders for ONE weekend and concentrate on your work, thanks. Also, if you’re going to do a show and people paid thousands to see it, can you please rehearse so you actually know the lyrics to your own songs. I don’t come to shows to listen to the fans sing. I come to hear YOU sing. And play. That’s if the band even bothers to show up.
I could go on and on but what finally made me go “I have had it!” was him disappearing from sm and only coming on when he needs something from us. When he only remembered he has fans when he wanted our votes or our money or needed us to do PR for him. And him lying the whole time. Can you take things seriously for once and quit being immature and actually say what you mean for once. And do what you say. Don’t expect us to believe you and feel sorry for you if you say your back hurts soooo much, but instead of taking care of it, you’re flying around long distance to go to fashion shows and to unnecessarily go to some art gallery for a day and when you can go rock climbing with your kittens. Same thing goes for your knee.Don’t go on sm to whine about it to get attention and do ice baths in trash cans and come on stage wth a cane when you then after two songs take off your knee brace and jump around.
The last drop for me was the lies about the new album. the ten millionth “#soon. The "we’re 80% done” for 2 years straight. The “We’re finishing the album today” only to tell us two weeks later that he’s working on the lyrics on the first single. Only to tell us the album isn’t even done. At some point it stops being funny and becomes pathetic. Come tease us about a new album WHEN YOU ACTUALLY HAVE AN ALBUM: And dont go around talking about how “exhausted” you are now that you finished ONE SONG. In FOUR years. Seriously, dude! Have you lost touch with reality completely?! Do you actually even know what HARD WORK and REALLY being exhausted from working is like? You need to get out in the real world more, dude. Stop hanging out with your freeloaders whose only job is to go from one vacation to another and lay around by the pool all day or who get dressed by other people and their only job is to look pretty in pictures. That’s not hard work. Neither is doing one song in four years. That’s just insulting. And if your staff can’t get even one lyric video right, it’s time to finally take a look at your staff and start hiring professionals. How hard is it to get a LYRIC video with two verses right? You write the lyrics down, the person doing the lyric video writes them on the video and reads it through. Another person looks at the LYRICS video when it’s done and compares the lyrics to proofread. Boom. Done. Don’t need to be a genius to do that.
I don’t know what happened to J. If the Oscar and the millions he got from the Joker role went to his head and his ego got too inflated and he got lazy, because why work when you can make money by doing nothing? Or if he completely lost touch with reality after hanging out too much with the type of people he does and since he’s dressed head to toe in Gucci and no doubt gets it all for free, he thinks everyone can afford to throw around thousands. Or he just was a shallow douchebag who is full of himself before too and he just played another Oscar worthy role…the “Oscar J” role…and people fell for that PR campaign. And now the real J is coming out again? I don’t know.
For me to be able to like J again, he needs a huge piece of humble pie. Tone done the attitude. You’re not above everyone else J. You’re not the center of everyone’s universe. You’re not THAT important and you definitely are NOT “different” than most in HW. In fact, you’re pretty much a cliche. So stop acting like you’re “all that”. You’re not. Tone down the Gucci. Seriously. We’re sick of it. Start hanging out with smart people. You’ll be surprised how inspiring smart people actually are. And yeah, most of them don’t look like models, but the good news is you don’t have to sleep with them. You can actually just be friends with people. That’s if you can bear to breathe the same air as someone who is normal weight or, god forbid, overweight. Get involved in your community. If you actually care for the environment or for animals so much, prove it. Letting your interns RT a tweet or two does not count as being “active”. And if you write a “protest song”, please do show with your ACTIONS that you care about things BEFORE writing said song and conveniently using a current unrest to sell it. Stop lying. Seriously. We’re not dumb. Be who you are, whatever it is. But ffs STOP LYING about who you are!!!!!! Put some effort into your work again. Focus. You once did. We want that J back.
***
Extremely well said, anon.
I found myself nodding and agreeing all the way through.
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