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#i cant believe i have to go through this shit
puhpandas · 10 hours
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This might come off as controversial, but Steel Wool is not immune to criticism. I don’t like how Steel Wool is treating Gregory for numerous reasons, but them setting him up to be a bad person feels wrong when no other child character is treated this way. They don’t want to acknowledge him as a victim and like okay, we get it, we hardly see his trauma, but hello? Is he not still a child? How is he any different from other kid protagonists that wanted to live in this franchise?
There’s a higher standard for the games sure, but it’s weird to me that background book characters get treated way better. They don’t want him to be exactly like Cassie, which understandable, but we’ve already seen few Cassie characteristics from him? To ignore that is ignoring a big part of his character. Why would he do anything in the story then if he was just as bad and destructive as they portray him as? He still needs motives, even if they want to strip him of any characterization so we never feel bad for him. They’re actively refusing giving him positive attributes because they’d hate it if he started challenging other characters/fans favs, but that’s what makes a good story compelling. It feels like they’re taking their anger out on him through their writing if that makes sense?
I’m a little concerned he’s gonna be the one who dropped the elevator because it feels true, otherwise why would RUIN be so full of blatant Gregory hate? They want us to hate him, that’s quite all there is to it.
them never showing us him as a character on a normal day and only when hes in a life or death situation making a split second decision that could decide the fate of himself and everyone he loves definitely has something to do with it. they only show his 'blunt' decisions to do something bad for a good reason, and not what he would be making that decision for. we never get to see him just be a normal kid, we never get to see him after sb deserving to have that happy ending, we only see the bad
but I dont feel like this is just. we hate this 12yo character and like the other one better so we're making him evil and shitting on him. they probably do want people to see the bad things he did for a reason that we dont know yet.
them framing Gregory as cutting the elevator whether he did it or not was very blatant in that decision. it feels like they want to give him a 'redemption arc' in the eyes of the fandom in come kind of way since people have disliked him from the very beginning. like they want us to see him do these bad things, and then maybe theyll actually show us that he didnt want to do these things later, and maybe things will be different.
like, I cant be the only one who feels like Gregory and the elevator is a setup for something. obviously to trap cassie down below, but in that case they didnt have to make Gregory be the one do drop it, just blatantly the mimic. they want us to believe this for a reason, and that would be to show us at the very least a reasoning later. I dont believe that reason is just "we fucking hate this child character and want everyone else to as well" that's just. crazy to me.
they wouldnt make Gregory do many kind things for other characters if they hated him. they wouldnt have had him comfort cassie on her birthday and make them canonically close friends if they wanted to make him genuinely heartless.
keep in mind that with SBs nuked characterization and no focus on Gregory since then, we havent even gotten to see his pov in a long time. just Cassies so far, and Cassies story is pretty much built off of perspective. the MIMIC is literally a tool to make characters perspectives about eachother change or distort because it would frame a character as doing something they didn't
mimic is literally going to be used to cause confusion and distrust within characters and it literally did that and accomplished that in ruin. cassie is going to believe Gregory cut the elevator whether he did it or not. and that's why I genuinely believe he didnt. why on earth would they introduce a character that's main purpose would be to do bad things to characters in another characters name to cause drama and then just. have the character have actually have done it lmao.
TLDR: I dont believe steel wool would steep as low as to make a 12yo kid trying to survive actually evil or even just hate him as the creators, and I also think the story of cassie and ruin and beyond is designed off of making Gregory look bad (the mimics purpose as a villain being causing uproar and doing bad things in another characters name to cause distrust from another) from Cassies perspective so he can appear later and disprove those beliefs as a sort of 'redemption arc' to cassie and the fans
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succubratty · 2 years
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Calling out a pedophile
CW: pedophilia/lolisho mention/tons of bad words.
Seriously, if you have a humiliation kink, this post might be for you? Idk.
This happened a week ago; I apologize in advance for this huge ass post that is non-kink related, but tbh I came here to relax and express my kinks and some other thoughts. There’s always some idiot who wants to give you shit, and this happened to be a very disgusting one.
I’ll put a “read me more” because it is a very long post; if you read the entire thing, I’ll thank you in advance too.
Okay, so this asshole came to my blog and made the following comments on my Miss Kobayashi post/review:
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Ok pedophile… 
First and foremost: 
You're fucking ridiculous! We were like this with my gf reading your comments:
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Second:
Let me say a few words before destroying this twerp: 
A person who gets so upset because I criticized the sexualization of kids in an anime show is a pedo or a pedophile apologist. If you deny this shit, you have a severe problem, and I encourage you to seek medical care, go see a shrink or something; I don't care.
I knew some dumbfuck would give me shit for something like this, but I didn’t think It would be so soon; honestly, the post doesn't even have a month since I wrote it?.
I'm freaking disgusted with your comments. Do you insult and make assumptions in every person's posts about an opinion you don't like? Because that was just my opinion, and you got upset because I called out the pedo culture in anime and manga?
Be thankful that I didn’t touch on the topics of big tits and the objectification of women in the same anime/manga because I also have an opinion towards that, and spoiler alert based on your comments, you’re not going to like it.
You don’t have your age in your bio, so you don’t deserve more attention than these things I’m going to say.
And finally, third:
Let me analyze your two comments piece by piece.
First comment:
“If you hate lolisho/moe culture so much Go to Western Animation!. Wait, you don’t because your fellow neurotics neutered it of much its former charm and creativity.”
What the actual fuck is “lolisho/moe culture!”? You shady motherfucker, a culture that sexualizes little kids? the fact that it is animated or inside a manga doesn't make it less severe, so yeah, if you refer to that as “lolisho/moe culture” I fucking hate it! And it is disgusting how weeb/otaku and western culture had normalized this shit that is seen as “normal” or as a “trope” and that you have to put in your anime to make it work.
Also, as I said in my original post, I blame the sexist and misogynistic Japanese culture too because they let this shit happen over and over; I mean, they banned gay marriage weeks ago. Still, you can marry your Hatsune Miku pillow? (no intention to shame Vocaloid fans here just made an example), but something is not right when nonsense like that happens.
“(...) Go to Western Animation!. Wait, you don’t because your fellow neurotics neutered it of much its former charm and creativity.”
It’s impressive your poor intent of sarcasm, trying to assume that you know me and what kind of animation I consume. I mean, who are my “fellow neurotics”? Me and who “neutered it“ what? In your own words, “Its former charm and creativity”? Can you even elaborate? No, you just dare to leave that shit in the air; you insignificant slag! Like you aren't even able to tell me what is that “charm” and “creativity”?
You talked so much shit in such a small sentence. Still, I assume that the “charm” and “creativity” you refer it has some relation with “lolisho/moe culture.”? Hence “my fellow neurotics” (that I don’t know who they are) “neutered” western animation from their former sexualization of kids? Is that what you are trying to tell me? Ew! You sick bastard.
Second comment:
“And don’t bring your trans status to justify your power-hungry, woke mindset. Your love for ugliness (literal shit and piss) and hatred of cuteness (in this case, lolisho) is your individual problem, trans people can enjoy Moe as much as anyone else.”
Again you’re so freaking pathetic trying to make assumptions like if you knew me, suddenly you, a complete stranger, defined my whole personality based on a post. You better watch out for who you throw hate at because you’re not going to get this free.
“your trans status to justify your power-hungry, woke mindset” 
I’m laughing so hard at this because I receive the same hate from bigots, transphobic and fascist scumbags like you every single day. 
Oh yes! I’m so “power-hungry” that I didn’t even tag the original post with labels from the show, so “power-hungry” that before your two comments, the post only had two likes, give me a break. 
I just wrote my opinion on a matter that disturbs many people who watch anime, and I did it in the best way I can analyze this, which is from a gender studies perspective.
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“Woke mindset”? Sure, why not? If your bigoted ass like to call “woke mindset” a call-out on pedophilia and the sexualization of kids in an anime that is one of many others like that, you think you’re so freaking smart, and you don’t have fucking idea what you’re talking about.
“Your love for ugliness (literal shit and piss)” 
First, you came to my post and blog, trying to kink-shame me? So you realized this is my kink blog, and you get to decide what is ugly and beautiful? Because of my sexual preferences and kinks? No FUCKING way! I will not tolerate your stupid rants on my blog, you miserable cunt. If you ever want to make a serious argument, you better find some original ideas and don’t fucking do this.
 “(...) and hatred of cuteness (in this case, lolisho) is your individual problem, (...)” 
Now lolisho equals cuteness? Are you fucking serious? You make me sick because, in my post, I criticized this exact thing.
Lolicon and shotacon are literal a whole genre dedicated to the sexualization of minors; again, the fact that it is designed in a “moé” style doesn't make it less severe.
I never made a rant on the character design or the “cuteness” aspect (the moé style), but it seems you completely IGNORED the: “sexualization of minors” part.
You focused on the idea that I hate cute stuff because I have these kinks. A bold assumption, I must say, because I love cute stuff; what I don’t love and I do hate is:
THE SEXUALIZATION OF MINORS DISGUISED IN CUTE DESIGNS TO MAKE IT MORE BEARABLE/PASSABLE!.
Did I make this clear?
Or do I have to use more giant capital letters for you to understand?. 
“(...) your individual problem (...)”
Besides being a redundant phrase, do you live with your head stuck inside your ass or something?
PEDOPHILIA, IT'S FUCKING WRONG! YOU DISGUSTING PIECE OF SHIT! 
And the fact that these things are so normalized between some anime and manga consumers is a BIG fucking problem!
If you think this kind of shit doesn’t affect people, maybe you have to start getting out, pop your weeb bubble, and learn some empathy; the only ugly thing here is you and your dumb comments trying to defend the sexualization of minors in an anime show.
“(...) trans people can enjoy Moe as much as anyone else.” 
This last phrase is so fucking funny because you assumed that: 
“As a trans person giving my opinion and criticizing this, I am now a spoken law.” 
Like yeah, sure, champ, now because I gave my opinion on the internet about a Dragon’s Girls show that depicts the sexualization of minors (and that has two likes, no tags, etc., etc.), trans people cannot enjoy this?, because I never said this, what I said and I quote myself:
I'll always be against it; as a trans woman (that often gets seen as a walking fetish), as a transfeminist, as a sex worker making content, and as a professional animator working in this medium, I will always call these things out, and be as consequential as I can.
And yes, animation is my day job, you dim-wit; I know a freaking lot about this industry and how it works; not only it's my day job, I work in politics. I know how pathetic bigoted haters liars like you think; I can fucking destroy the arguments of a bigoted congressman in an IRL situation, and I’m not going to ruin yours?.
Do you think I was born yesterday or something?
So trans ppl can enjoy moé as anyone else? If you refer to moé as a synonym of cuteness and the way character design works in modern manga and anime, of course, they can, you asshole!.
I never said something against that and made an imperative sentence saying such things, so again you’re putting words in my mouth that I never said.
Now, if you refer to “lolisho” stuff, do I have to answer this again?
I didn’t make my point clear already?
Or do you need Windex or some shit to read it more clearly?.
And if you dare to make dumb assumptions about me, my fetishes, and the things I like, you came to the wrong neighborhood, you scumbag!.
I will not tolerate the presence or interaction with people like you on my blog. I erased your comment and blocked you because this issue is not up for debate; not going to allow you to “defend” yourself. I have zero tolerance for losers like you who come here talking shit, and do you think you can get away with it? You’re not outsmarting anyone; even a clown has more dignity. 🤡
So if for some reason you came across to this, and you dear to answer me back, I’m going to delete your puny arguments because you don’t worth the time and effort. Take this post as an example; I was freaking angry with something else, and I just used you as a punching bag; you were a sparring session; you’re nothing.
And this will apply to anyone who dares to do the same.
And I hope this will be my last word on the matter; it is disgusting trying to make an argument with pedos/maps and scumbag like that.
If you are a dear follower/mutual and you read this till the end and agree with most of these things I wrote above, I appreciate it so much.
SuccuBratty
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hamable · 3 months
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Porter better have nemesis alert on because I’m coming for his ass with so much bureaucratic WRATH and ANGER and RAGEEEE and I will fucking disintegrate him.
OOOOOOOHHHHRHRHRBSBSB I can’t get over it I’ll fucking show him rage let me at him. Let mE AT ‘IM.
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yooniesim · 6 months
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...I can't believe I have to say this, but I'm allowed to ban people from my server that trigger other members that are survivors of SA and CSA by blatantly consuming and promoting that sort of content. And I'm allowed to personally block people for whatever reason I wish. Especially if they are putting minor sim characters in sexual poses, posting sexual content on their simblr untagged that allows minors to follow for their cc, and liking posts that call me slurs and tell me to kill myself. If you're someone that's hurt over that and think it's talking bad about you as a person for people to openly not be comfortable with that, you need to grow up. Actually follow the tenants of the "dead dove" concept you're an apparent enthusiast of by tagging your fetish content and keeping it away from minors, and temper some of the terrible aspects of your personality. You'll have less trouble in the future.
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snakedman · 7 months
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nibbled kidneys
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felizusnavidad · 6 months
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i just remembered how bel @immercuryinretrograde called me in the evening after seeing the little mermaid (2023) for the first time a few months ago and we were fangirling together over the phone, i love her so much
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i-bring-crack · 5 months
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Officially decided that I will make a Princess Jewel's webtoon fanfic be so fucked up no one will have a good time.
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snekdood · 6 days
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ppl who larp about the Revolution™ almost seem to expect someone *else* to take the leading role in it all so they can sit inside on their asses and do jack shit, they know they have no meaningful skills to offer and would only slow people down, but expect to *somehow* magically radicalize most americans into doing all the work for them because awww dey're just such a weak wittle babu that needs to be pwotected and defwended awlways uwu
like. come on. get a grip. if everything went your way and someone actually stronger than you came along to take the lead, you're likely not being invited, and you'll likely be left behind... which means left to the alt right, who will no doubt come to your house to see if you're perpetuating anything "woke", and you gotta know they wont just ask, they'll barge in and look through everything even your computer.
though, you should really focus on your plan. your first step: get along with people enough to even actually convince them its a good idea, and we all know you'll never dare to try that shit. you cant even be on here w/o blocking someone like me for even suggesting you are approaching this like a child playing war and you have NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
you think you want a second holocaust (which is essentially letting trump win, i mean hitler got the majority vote in germany. thats how he rose to power. didn't just materialize out of thin air), but you dont seem to grasp the gravity of what that entails, or even that you'd be thrown in the camps with everyone else, all to stick it to jewish ppl and "the libs", even if it means you and all the ones you love die along with them. you are a net negative to humanity and quite frankly should be on a fucking watch list.
#tankies#accelerationists#i dont think the power of love and friendship is gonna carry you through this one guys#you're waiting for someone to come along and save you- this revolution is nothing more than a complex fantasy of you being saved#and protected. nothing more.#i understand you're scared. i understand you've made this idea your whole life and the only thing you dream about to feel better#about living in a world where you're oppressed and constantly in pain and have no power. it makes sense. i create such fantasies for myself#sometimes. but when we come back to reality- we cant expect to take the whole fantasy with us per se#the world isnt one day going to magically go exactly your way. its just not going to happen. it'd be nice if it did- we think- but it wont#you have to be more practical in this. you can use your fantasy as a motivator. a goal. be the change you want to see etc. etc.#but YOU have to take steps making it a reality. no one is going to be the all knowing person who saves you from all the problems#and can do all the things you cant do and save the day or whatever. it's never going to happen. you have to be that person#for yourself. if you're gonna larp about a revolution you have to at the bare minimum have this understood.#after that- you need conflict resolutions skills and to know how to communicate#you'll need to learn how to get along with people you dont like at all. you'll need to learn how to communicate your ideas effectively#you'll need to learn how to argue and defend your ideas and how to have the humility to be wrong and accept it and the ability#to change your mind. you'll have to educate yourself and keep educating yourself. you'll have to learn how to actually listen to other#ppl instead of trying to find a way to manipulate them to believe what you do#and after all that social stuff is out of the way- you need to learn some mother fucking SURVIVAL SKILLS BITCH#how to FIGHT and SURVIVE in any kind of environment. how to use weapons and build fires out of nothing n shit#if you cant manage all of that? you're fucked.
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do you think they tried at all. i cant see it ending well
blaine: stop-- i- i don't want to go in there--
blaine: c'mon. tell me honest this time. take me to spader.
#shaking them and shaking them and sha#theyre such a sheltered scared little kid and their friend is missing. hes a skeleton in a puddle of blood underground but besides that#like if they tried to find him. it would keep leading them through the scariestass dungeons theyve ever seen. torches and bones and shit#theyre not going down there. but#hops back and forth on their feet groaning.#but its saying spaders in there. and HES a scared sheltered kid too. and blaines got responsibilities yeah. they have to take care of him!#hes LOST! is he okay in there?#blaines not going in there.#maybe its glitching. m. maybe hes just out surfing like bufo said. m. thats. but he wouldnt be.#BUT he wouldnt be in this HOLE that blaine found under a well in the alleyway EITHER.#so why is the locator spell or the Show Me My BFF Spell sparkling merrily away into the darkness every time#does any of this make sense. can anyone hear me. im going feral over wizard city again.#its so simple. they taught the kids locator spells. and then dragged one of them underground and killed him.#and i dunno. maybe no one tried to look. not even the NON-EVIL ADULTS??? did they just believe bufo. how much did blaine try.#theyre all alone all they have rn is imagining larry goading them into action. and like.violent rage at pep because they think he did smth#but honey! what happened to using a locator spell. to find him with.#did it just give them butterflies and they gave up? did they know what that meant/DOES that mean hes dead and not just that pep and deb m-#-messed up the spell when THEY tried it and just got butterflys? i cant stop talking#this is terrible.#oh yeah#adventure time#distant lands#blaine#digital
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anaalnathrakhs · 5 days
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"people love you uwu people care about you" okay? not my problem. love me less. can we work out a reasonable level of care where it's obviously not cool if horrible things happen to me, a human being, and you won't do any horrible thing to me, but you don't feel obligated to fuss over anything out of the ordinary i do and i have to shut up about it and perform Normal Human Emotions lest i commit an awful social faux pas and hurt your feelings?
#like idk. can you care about stuff that matters? i guess is what i'm asking?#sorry that my own self-directed problems hurt you <3#sorry that i'm a horrible person if i talk about it and a horrible person if i don't <3#i just shouldn't have problems i guess cant believe i didnt think abt that#sorry i don't really care if people would be sad to see me die#would actually be pretty nice to get past the huge feeling of guilt over not being helpful all the fucking time#like i can't go through life being a service dog for everybody around me#(and i dont to be clear. it's not possible and when i say i feel guilty over not doing it it doesn't mean i do 100% of the time)#(i do try to be helpful and useful and i hate missing an opportunity but also i don't have 24/7 free of obligations)#(and i can't magically spot and correctly understand what could need help)#(but i feel like it does take up a good portion of my life. mostly bc everybody around me has Problems rn)#(and because the overlap of ''things that feel good for me'' and ''things that are good for other people'' is pretty small so far)#it's just. yknow. i would like it if for once i could express a negative feeling without it being a huge offense to people around me#ejhrkthrjeh i know i'm just asking the universe if pretty please my actions could have zero consequences and it's overall unrealistic#but like. god. i wish for once it was met with indifference. casual vibes. not a huge deal yknow.#some of my friends do sometimes! it's nice! but of course i can't talk abt the problems that directly include them#i know it makes me so shit at reacting to ppls problems. like either i overcompensate with the worry cuz i feel like thats what they want#or i react coldly and dont provide anything useful to the situation#broadcasting my misery#vent
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star-mum · 9 months
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Okay OP nation I have some (maybe controversial) statements about the Straw Hats and I need y’all to listEN FIRST OKAY- HEAR ME OUT
Boyfriend: Zoro and Franky
Husband: Usopp and Sanji
Girlfriend: Nami
Wife: Robin
Luffy: Aroace king
#DO YOU SEE THE VISION ????#like I am a Certified Zoro Girlie but thats not a husband... he has Boyfriend written all over him#I cant call him husband in my head - ‘oh that’s my Husband Zoro’ - ew no - 'thats my BOYFRIEND Zoro' - yes !#Franky is just cool and sensitive like that -> the boyfren to defeat all boyfrends -> i'd fall hard and fast -> like embarrassingly so#SANJI OH MY GOD !!! THE FIRST MAN WHO DARED TO MALEWIFE#and of course anime he has a couple red flags but I always put those on ‘annoying anime trope’ rather than accepting thats a part of him (C#(OPLA IS HERE TO PROVE THAT) shit like in canon they kinda set him up as this totally uncool Wannabe Casanova (which he is !!)#but he’s also just effortlessly charming ???? me at 7 y/o watching his intro for the very first time ??? a goner !!! -> me at 20 yo watchin#GOD !! USOPP !! THE MAN ! THE KING ! THE LEGEND -> I have ALWAYS been an Usopp girlie -> cause im always right and i love to win#y’all gonna give a pathetic cowardly little man with huge dreams and an even bigger heart who ALWAYS stands up for whats right#DESPITE BEING SCARED ???? I’m in the chapel baby lets do this 👰🏻 -> also his tiddies are always out ??? DUNGAREES WITH NO SHIRT !! WHATS NO#risking his life fighting an incredibly powerful and scary pirate for an entire village who didn’t treat him fairly and DIDNT BELIEVE HIM#him going to a place he was Not Welcomed and constantly mistreated at only to tell a DYING girl incredibly fun stories and keep her company#cause he saw his mom go through the same thing as a kid ? -> i love him yall 🥺#NAMI !!! thats Girlfriend with a capital G -> shes pretty greedy and a little bit (very) mean -> i love her sm i want her to rule my life#RO !! BIN !! the crush I have on that woman is honestly embarrassing -> she is THE wife -> do not be mistaken#i dont really see Luffy wanting a romantic relationship but that’s not gonna stop me from reading fanfic about him ; p#i had to edit this and glue some tags together so they'd all fit -> thats why theres so many arrows -> I have Thoughts okay -> let me live#one piece#opla#one piece live action#straw hats
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jiimwii · 1 year
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cyberpsychosis could maybe be so cool if it was people being possessed by some sort of rouge ai,or as part of a corporate conspiracy. like as a planned obsolescence thing where certain parts during production are programmed to make people Do That after a certain point so you have to buy the next new 20,000eddies cannon arms to replace the nearly identical previous model or else you might kill everyone you love and die because your cyberwares "outdated". or untraceable viruses infecting competing corporations cyberware using their rival's customer's livelihoods to sabotage their profits. and maybe any one of those things works in such a way that its designed to detect atypical brain chemistry in a host,and thus triggers more frequently with them to tage advantage of and use those people as a scapegoat and a way to further fear monger against them,and you can uncover that this is the case. or something along those lines. and the more cyberware someone has the more likely it is that they could encounter any of these scenarios. but no it is just #crazy people being too #crazy.
#they kinda toyed w something like that in earlier drafts. with dollchips and the project ghost thing thats too much to explain in tumbletags#but yeah#honestly w how little its present in the final game beyond Go Herd Them Up And Beat The Shit Out Of Them So They Can Recover In Therapy#Offscreen In An Optional Sidequest With Literally No Conclusion they couldve easily just retconned its existence in the world entirely#especially since really the only reason why it exists in the lore in the first place is so the humanity system in the ttrpg keeps your#character from becoming too overpowered from too much cyberware. like thats it.#but for how much they dont wanna flesh out any other conspiratorial type stuff for the sake of ''It is a Mystery👻''#and how much they went with ''idk where cyberpsychosis comes from we dont know if its even real'' ingame#edgerunners and mike pondsmith himself sure have a lot to say about it and exactly how it works#we cant even leave that up for interpretation for players to find some way into coping themselves into believing its not as weirdly ableist#as it is#and we cant do anything else with it that would actually be cool. or make sense. in universe and just logically.#however. im a dumbfuck and am not beyond thinking about how like. in a hypothetical scenario where melissa welles is still around#And jackies bled out corpse is still used for the arasaka supersoldier program and is going around killing people.i cant not think about ho#mama welles would have to handle both of her kids dying and also going on rampages out of (mostly) anyones control. like think about that.#heart wrenching and whatnot. could you fucking imagine with everything else shes been through.#anyway sorry for talking about things that very literally probably less than a dozen ppl know/care about its just. interesting.#i froth over the potential that it had#that im tricking myself into believing that it had
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silverislander · 2 months
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i have 7 assignments, total, left in school. once i finish those i'm going to be done- i graduate in may which is WILD to think about. i just have to fucking do them
#im not getting anything done today so far and its like. midway through the afternoon already#and i realized how close i am to graduating and how i have no idea what comes after that and now im just kind of directionlessly panicked#which is. really helping the situation as you could imagine /s#im really close to finishing a couple of things rn. could get at least one done today#i REALLY need to get to work on my essay bc that largely determines whether i get honours and im pretty behind schedule on it#and i havent looked at at least one final assn and i do NOT have much time left to start it. its not small#theres barely any time left in the semester at all#i just need to finish Smth today#levi.txt#i cant make myself do anything and im panicked abt that which makes it impossible to do anything#and taking breaks makes me feel guilty AND panicked so i cant even reset w a short break and come back#my parents Consistent response to my anxiety has been. poor at best. and they dont believe i have adhd at all#so if i talk to them abt either of those things they get upset w me and claim i just dont want to take their 'advice' so i cant be helped#and the advice is shit like 'dont feel that way' and 'simply go do your work'#like. i talked to my mom abt how stressed i feel bc im behind and her response was basically 'thats what you get for falling behind'#i havent seen my friends in a while either or at least not in an environment where we can actually hang out and talk#idk man. i just really wish i could stay in bed and watch a show and not feel sick bc of how anxious i am abt it all#i want to write again. i miss it a lot i havent been able to write in months now
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pineappical · 1 year
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i need to be productive but i need 6 billion days to recover from tHAT EPISODE
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amimuu · 5 months
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heyyy so remember that one post i made about creating a game....
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yeah.
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i think its going to be a little long.
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koishua · 1 year
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my mom sitting there nodding along to my very emotional retelling of how i was chased by my classmate (actually my crush but she doesn't have to know that) who kept shoving a dead lizard in my face in ninth grade
#tp#might sound silly now but i genuinely felt like i was about to die from the stress of it#i hated him after that#he deliberately did that because i told them i was scared of lizards#had the gulls to laugh at me losing my absolute shit too that bastard#laugh as i shove the stick higher up your ass then how bout it#i could have grabbed a chair and given him a high five with it on his face#but being the bigger person i am i just cried in the bathroom afterwards bye 🚶🚶#and then i realized i was being bullied 😭😭 took me a while to clock that#i cant believe i used to like him im so done actually#comparing him and the guy im now very much enamoured by ... the difference is in the actions#god he bought me overpriced coffee at ten in the night outside bc he thought i could need company#and he was RIGHT goddamn it that guy#'i didnt know if you liked it with sugar or not so i brought two just in case' are you shitting me you're an angel#walked me around and talked me out of feeling like utter shit for two whole hours god im falling for my quote unquote therapist friend#i havent seen him for four five months im going through withdrawal#and then when we were back at the hotel and i stayed up reading a book at the lobby he came down and said he would sit with me#and he would stay awake just in case because he noticed a creep at our floor im going to fucking SOB#and obviously i couldnt make him stay up for me so i said okay i would go back to my room so he wouldnt have to worry#AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID???#he made sure i entered my room and closed the door safe and sound before going back down the hallway to his ⁉️⁉️#DO YOU NOT SEE HOW PERFECT HE IS
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