#i FUCKING love these bc i love talking abt myself
Text
Genuinely so curious who Mike thinks is gonna be buying The Cage or the new DCTL GN bc with the way he tweets as far as he's concerned, it's not gonna be:
The queer people he has actively admitted he will never show any representation of in the games.
2. The POC he has actively fought against representing in his franchise. [Who he also mocked for thinking they would be represented in his franchise]
3. The Bendy fandom which has always been concerned with topics of diversity esp in the sense of queer people since its creation. Who he has responded to really poorly esp in regards to the GN.
4. The fans who critique him. [He blocked me for doing so lol]
5. His fans in general who he tweets about like this currently. [He's being vague about why people were mad at him or sent him 'nasty messages' because if you actually looked into why you'd see he was in the wrong. Either way, a very hateful way to speak abt ur own fanbase.]
Reminder while Mike is trash talking his fans he has always treated them rather poorly. The fans who won the fanart contest for Chapter 5 never got their posters actually in game due to it being rushed. Not only was chapter 5 a big slap to the face story wise, but it was literally so rushed he couldn't be bothered to add in the art his fans gave him for his game FOR FREE. [Meatly blames this on a crazy timeline, reminder him and Mike are the literal ceos of this company. The proposal of future updates here is also pretty cruel considering Mike nowadays happily admits he corrupted Chapter 5's source code and therefore literally can't update it At All currently. Because he is a moron]
At least they got to be in Boris and the dark survival, and by that I mean that was the Only game they got to be in so far, isn't that just treating your fans like you love them? Shoving their hard work into a spin off game almost nobody has played or addresses much. [Hell, who knows if with the Lone Wolf rebrand they'll even stay there. In which case they'll be in None of the games, only in the credits of BATIM]
6. The Bendy fans who just generally disagree with him on stuff. Like the new ink demon design where there is literally a public poll showing people generally prefer the old one.
7. The Bendy fans who can see he is actively lying to them. To their fucking faces.
He says this has always been the case, but screenshots and links to tweets regarding the books being canon prove it was not. Does he really think bendy fans are stupid or something? [Unless he's admitting here he lied to Kress when he told her the books were canon which sounds worse!]
8. Anyone who doesn't like the idea of giving money to a guy who laid off tons of employees then afterwards thought it was a great idea to express his anti-union views! Also brag about how good of an employer he was, according to his employees, he was not!
So in summary; Mike is an awful person who has not learned anything from the awful things he did. I will not be purchasing The Cage because, combined with this and his absolute refusal to take any kind of critique or see any differing interpretation of his franchise, I have no reason to think my problems with the franchise will ever be addressed or fixed. I probably will pirate The Cage along with any future Bendy Products [Including the movie] and will do my best to avoid giving it any kind of monetary support. Unless this changes any time soon, I can't see myself making anymore positive Bendy posts soon.
Mike has just managed to make it so hard to speak positively or optimistically of this franchise when he's so willing to broadcast how little he cares about it or its fans. I'm at the point where I refuse to pull any of my punches with my problems with it. What's the point of trying to play nice with my critique when either way the people creating it don't care?
So with this post, I want to invite anyone who feels similarly about the franchise to tell me, make a post or send an ask talking about how all of this makes you feel. It may not change how things are, but genuinely seeing other people share my feelings of anger makes me feel better. It feels nice to see when other people share our same concerns and worries. I'd also love to know if anyone else thinks they'll be avoiding purchasing Bendy products over this.
I'm not forcing anyone to participate in it nor trying to say anyone who doesn't supports mike but genuinely maybe if we can collectively decide to boycott things like the movie, graphic novel and The Cage... It might at least make the bendy devs acknowledge how much they have destroyed their own fandom's faith and trust in them.
The way Mike tweets about his actions like he had no control over why people were mad at him at least proves to me he takes NONE of it back nor regrets it. If you didn't know about his actions and only went off his tweets, you would be led to believe Mike has been needlessly picked apart by fans over things he couldn't control [or in his own words, had his words twisted and taken out of context]. That is not how you speak about your actions if you have actually learned better from them.
anyway, that has been my bendy dev callout post. This is an open invitation to anyone feeling similarly upset about the way the franchise is going to talk about it. It's genuinely nice to see how people feel about this and the more we talk about the more it's likely the bendy devs are forced to address our concerns. I don't think they will but hey, that's why I'm not gonna support them with my money anymore nor am I gonna be nice to them in any content I make critiquing Bendy. I mean I'm also basically making this post just in case anyone asks me Why I feel this way towards to bendy devs/as a way to respond to anyone who thinks I am too harsh in my critique in the future.
As always, it seems the best part of Bendy isn't actually anything about canon but about what the fan's are creating with the ideas Bendy failed to do anything interesting with.
Also the books, the books slap.
#batim#batdr#bendy and the ink machine#bendy and the dark revival#ramblez#bendy and the silent city#bendy the cage#for the record another reason Im making this post is bc some of the only good resources to learn abt why the bendy devs suck are some old#very longer videos and this is a very long post but I thought it was important to document the recent shit theyve been doing alongside some#of the worst past things theyve done bc Mike has been trying to misinform people on what happened but those videos are still great resource#if you want more info n such#long post#mike D#for anyone who doesnt wanna hear abt him since he doesnt go by mood anymore#sorry if this is rambley or emotional Im just so sick of these guys fr dskjhgskdfjghskdjhgkjhsd#I miss when I didnt spend my days stressed about the awful shit mike is gonna say next and how I would have to disprove it in a post later#or explain why its bad to have a cast of nothing but cishet white guys n constantly fight back against any push for diversity in said cast#genuinely its just tiring esp when u see other bendy fans give ignorant or very silly defenses/takes on those things#n then u lose a lot of respect for them bc they are speaking on stuff they dont know much abt so confidently and therefore misinforming#people or even encouraging very bad views on stuff like diversity n its importance#Im not saying people like that are bad people but it is stressful n upsetting when u see someone u thought knew better do that sort of thin#it makes it hard to trust them again on other issues bc u now dont trust they know what they r talking abt!!#like please think twice before telling young artists making norman white was a tough and complicated decision it was fucking not the bendy#devs just think all their humans are white by default and dont wanna change that its been proven time n time again thats all it is#and defending them just bc u like a franchise they made is very very bad!! They are not ur friends!! they suck and we seriously need to#stop pretending they dont!! toxic positivity is only gonna make the fandom an absolute nightmare its not gonna make ANYTHING better#it just means people will be forced to PRETEND they never have negative thoughts abt the franchise n therefore make them burned out#just look at other similar fandoms please lets not make those same mistakes!!#sorry can u tell Ive been having just. A time recently#anyways back to making my queer ass bendy fan game full of so much diversity mike will prolly shit when he sees it DKFJGHKSDJHGKJHSD
28 notes
·
View notes
Text
not to be too real but since we're talking about it... we always talk about will feeling lonely which is fair, but... it is such an Ugly, isolating, and genuinely heart-wrenching feeling to be the odd one out in your family, and to watch them treat others who aren't related to you the way you wish they would treat you, to watch them perform their familial roles with them and not you.
nancy's the only person in his family that mike could talk to, the only person that has the same trauma and would understand, and yet... he can't. they don't ever talk unless it's to be snippy and bite. nancy spends more time caring about max and will than she does mike, her own little brother.
holly is too young for him to bond with like that. she's just barely a kid, one that still needs to be cared for.
his mom tries her best, but he doesn't feel comfortable being vulnerable with her. considering the fact that she did everything "right" according to society's standards and married their dad of all people, i doubt he feels comfortable showing her who he really is. he lets her hug him when he's at his lowest, but we don't see them actually connecting.
his dad is just some ghost that haunts his house. he doesn't care about mike or think highly of him at all. the only times we've seen him pay mike any attention are when he belittles his interests, mocks him, punishes him, or shuts him down by telling him to listen to his mother. the only support he gets from him is financial in nature.
meanwhile, everyone else has a family they can turn to. dustin, despite lying to his mother to keep her out of his shenanigans, seems to have a decent relationship with her. even if he doesn't, he still has steve and robin. lucas is shown to have a healthy relationship with his parents and erica. will and el have their family.
max's situation is different, but she has the backing of the party; people that love her and actively try to help her and pull her back into the world of the living. she isn't thrust into a leadership role that doesn't allow for vulnerability. she has nancy who is willing to fight monsters for her, el who literally performed a miracle for her, and lucas who has stood by her since the beginning.
and mike... well. he has will back now, sure, but... things have been different between them for a long time now, even if they're both trying their best to be how they were before. and before then, will obviously was in california, not returning his calls or reaching out, making mike feel like he'd lost him for good.
so... all that being said, it's not that surprising that mike is the way he is: riddled with abandonment issues, wanting to be needed, immediately apologizing whenever he dares to open up, inclined to give others the protection and comfort no one's ever given him, prone to jealousy and possessiveness, unable to be completely and wholly honest about what troubles him, not exactly the most open to new people, and someone with appallingly low self-esteem.
you know how they say people that are drowning don't always look like they're drowning? that's mike.
#mike#mine#wheeler#mike analysis#byler#i can't think abt him for longer than two seconds bc then i make myself sad lol <3#will's story is fucked up but at least he has people that love him and help him and SEE him and that he feels comfortable being his#true self with. but mike? :/ sigh.#mike just bottles it up and overcompensates / gets his mind off of it by caring for someone else.#like in the van scene when he's opening up to will and then immediately tries to deflect bc he thinks it's not important.#like... mike... you ARE important. you're feelings aren't stupid. you aren't some worthless loser with nothing to offer people.#the way that he talks about himself and the lack of support he has in his life is like ... actually so fucking sad lmao!#bc he spent all that time with el and sent her all those letters and yet they never actually got to know each other. it wasn't anything of#value. it was just company. and he had will but things started changing and mike felt like will was pulling away from him. then they both#moved across the country and he tried to call will all those times but couldn't reach him. and then will never reached out first so he just#straight up felt like he'd lost will. and the remaining party members are great but like mike says they aren't will. so he was just alone.#bites my own hand bites my own hand bites my own hand bites—
805 notes
·
View notes
Text
lots of respect for ppl who don't post/talk abt certain oc things due to not wanting to spoil their own stuff, however i will not be doing that. by the time any of this stuff is finished it'll probably be different anyways
#i have this thing where i simultaneously cannot ever find the words to articulate my oc stuff and the inability to shut up about it#who the fuck knows if i'll actually finish it. i mean i'd love to. i WANT to but these are (for now) passion projects and i can't devote#myself to them full time so! i'll hand over the details#nothing wrong with not wanting to spoil things either i get it. i jsut talk a lot. esp if i'm excited abt smthin#actually now that i think abt it there are some ttw things i keep close to my chest#partially for spoiler things but also the canon of the story is so wildly different from what it has been that it is the one case where i#don't want to introduce something cool and neat only to have it scrapped later bc this blog is evidence that i have done that. many times#and thinking abt storytelling the way i imagine honeybee being told is nonlinear so at times it necessitates me 'spoiling' things from#p1 and p2 for instance to explain how they got to where they are in p3#i'm thinking a bit more and with ttw being horror i think the next time i get around to taking a solid jab at it i will actually be more#cagey about certain things. esp in regards to sanguine as a whole#but it's underbaked in the middle rn so. shrugs#i still also don't really mind spoilers in general so i don't give much of a shit abt spoiling my own stuff yknow?#good stories are good regardless of spoilers and my intention is to make good stories. not that i can be the one to judge that tho#but i like what i make and that's the really matters yeeeeeeeehaaaawwwwwww#rambles
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
idc what people are whining abt, i actually really enjoyed the netflix avatar series. the costume and set design was really beautiful, the effects were great, the performances were great. i think people are weirded out about the pacing and i understand that, but at the same time, they're working on netflix's budget and i think they did a great job utilizing the important material in book 1 to tell as well rounded of a story as they possibly could. and like sure, i get that it was jarring to see them start at the VERY beginning instead of starting w katara and sokka finding aang like the original show does for ex, but like. idk! i think they shouldn't feel obligated to hit every plot point beat for beat and i don't think we lost anything by establishing aang's background early on. actually, every single scene with master gyatso made me fucking bawl lol. aang's loss is soooo much more palpable in this show than the original one imo bc it lingers on that pain a lot more. there were a few story choices that kinda made me scratch my head a bit, like the fact that teo wasn't introduced as part of the new Northern Air Temple population and what effects that had on aang, but i'm really not mad about it. anyways i give it two big thumbs up and i hope it gets renewed for another season
#i hate it when uber fans get uppity bc the thing isn't exactly the same as the thing they love and they go into it w a shit attitude#i chose to be optimistic abt it and i really enjoyed myself watching this season today#also tho like seeing how much fun the cast had working on it and hearing them talk abt how rare this experience is#(the experience of working on a primarily asian and indigenous american casted show)#was like. a once in a lifetime.life changing event for them. and most anything that provides jobs for people of color in the art is a#net good imo#anyways give it a shot if you're curious abt it#i actually bawled so much throughout the whole season lol it made me sooo emotional#zukko and iroh will never fail to get me but the aang and master gyatso stuff also supremely fucked me up#also azula is way more sympathetic very early on this time around and i appreciate them being realistic#abt the fact that having an abusive father like ozai would fuck any child up#avatar the last airbender spoilers#atla spoilers#atla#avatar the last airbender
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
There is only one person in this world to whom I made a heart sign with my hands.
I'm okay with that person being James Hetfield.
#james hetfield#it was at distance! mind you! but he was asking for love at the end of the concert and he looked like he was 'oh.. okay then...' with#just our screams. so i threw my hands up and made a big heart with both my hands and i was near enough that he noticed smiled#and poited at it. then his need for affection satisfied he continued down the line snsjakskssk#i am NOT the kind of person who does this#bc that is not how i show affection and i am...#well i am affectionate in my own ways sjsjsjsj let's say that#so i surprised myself snsjsjsjs well james hetfield can take it#IF THIS INTERACTION HAPPENED WITH LARS I WOULD HAVE FUCKING SCREAMED I WOULD HAVE TALKED ABT IT FOR DAYS#dnskksksks anyway. i should make a post abt my side of the concert? mhhh I'll think abt it#(d)jinn all'opera#jinn out#NOW THEY HAVE TO COME BACK NEXT YEAR or even better winter/autumn 2026
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
have been seeing this going around so i decided to make my own!!
(just a disclaimer i havent rewatched some of the seasons in a while so i did this according to what i remember)
#ninjago#ninjago dragons rising#levi's ted talks#the most recent seasons ive rewatched r hunted and sog and theyre still as good and thrilling as when i first watched#a little of s1 too#i put it down there bc the writing was kinda weird BUT it was the starting point of ninjago so im never hating on it#plus the memorable moments like goddamn#i constantly rewatch s13 i love it too much#i cant bring myself to rewatch seabound bcaause knowing whats gonna happen next is so fucking PAINFUL 😭#even tho im an angst lover the fucking seperation makes me bawl#my friend literally couldnt talk to me for a few days bc of the shock from the ending when it first came out#and to be completely honest DR is what got me fully back into the ninjago fandom#like id reblog posts n whatever but wasnt so involved#and id just rant with my friend abt it#but then when DR's release was announced i made my first post for it#(a redraw for an incorrect quote post: dig in my art tag and youll maybe find it . but beware)#and now im here with so many moots#art improvement and 3 fics and more coming aswell#how the fuck
31 notes
·
View notes
Text
sorry i'm losing my mind about them as always but....
IF i make a comparison between mitch and auston about hating to be left out/to abandon traditions.... what then. because mitch is so obviously someone who wants to be included... everybody knows it... cut to that article segment about how mitch just 'thinks it's bananas' that mo won't be able to meet up for lunch one random day of the week..... compared to auston, who lost his absolute mind the first time mo had to cancel on their 'tradition' of sitting courtside at the raptors game bc he got a girlfriend and she was in town... like . jealous much? NEED to know your place in your fav guys lives is cemented much? which is why it's so funny that those little bits of auston's personality only come out when he's comfortable... he is SO needy but. he will NOT be presenting that way outwardly ever if he can help it (unless he's telling a funny story to a group of men who Understand).
#like..... u know he sees that in mitch and is like. me too bud. lkJFDKLSF#thats why they WORK. BC. THEY VALUE THAT SPACE AND TIME AND TRADITION.#gotta make time for each other but so willing to bc they know what its like when they DONTTTT#thats why auston appreciates mitch so fucking much.. big ol smile on his face when he says#hes always keeping the team together :D giving the boys smth to laugh abt#i think its just so clear when auston talks who hes close to and who he finds the most amusing vs like.#You Know. anywya not letting myself be a hter today but.#I FIND THEM SO FUCKING AMUSING MANNN#auston loves mitch bc mitch is so outwardly. what hes never been in some ways...#he CAN hide his emotions and play coy but theres gotta be smth freeing abt seeing someone else not be able to do it.#and teasing them for it but also like. seeing urself mirrored in that and knowing its ok.#1634
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
procastinating at work but here's my philosophy for today: it's okay to hate a behavior in someone else but also understand that this behavior does not make them a bad person. like i HATE when i'm venting or talking about a serious problem i have and then the person i'm talking to starts trying to relate by talking about a similar experience they've had. like absolutely hate it. make me feel like the focus is being taken off me and it genuinely is in some ways, regardless of your intent. yeah, i understand that's your way of trying to comfort me -- but that's not the way i need or want to be comforted, and that's what matters in a situation where i'm coming to you to be helped.
and that's okay! like. no one is in the wrong here unless i have explicitly asked you to support me in a different way and you're intentionally refusing, or if i lash out at you when i could just disengage. it just means you're not a person i should go to for help when talking about my problems. we can still be friends, you and i can probably support each other in different ways, but we're just incompatible in this regard. and that's like....okay. it's okay to be incompatible with people.
#i need to stop going on instagram sooooo many hot takes on there piss me the fuck off#ok going on a rant here but like.#soooo many 'neurodivergent' posters on there are like 'neurotypicals suck bc they dont realize im being comforting when i talk abt myself#when they're upset!!!' and its like my friend i can understand your plight but like#1. this is an easily changable behavior#that tbh does not require much change on your part aside from just like. not talking.#2. the so-called neurotypicals in ur life are allowed to have boundaries and accomodations to their needs and ur currently not doing that#3. not every neurodivergent person does that. and some also hate it like the so called neurotypicals.#4. why are you prioritizing your emotions when a loved one comes to you for help or comfort. are u just a dick.#this has nothing to do with you being neurodivergent i think you're just self centered lol#like genuinely if you do this you are not a bad person. it's not a bad thing. i thinnk im just mad at the people who insist#that it's the only way they can ever try to comfort someone and they act like asking them to change this behavior is ableist#and if they genuinely can't change this behavior then fine!! like they i wont go to you with my problems#and that's also fine#but yeah anyways these tags are so different from the message of the post lol but anyways just needed to rant
47 notes
·
View notes
Text
so uh. that 2.2 Special Program, huh
#hsr#honkai star rail#hsr 2.2#hsr spoilers#hsr leaks#the body of this post reads as far less enthusiastic than i really am#i just don’t know how to casually return from my latest 2 week hiatus only to gush abt a game i’ve hardly blogged abt before#but i’m not making a whole ass sideblog for it like i did for Genshin. nah y’all r gonna bear witness to my fixation with this one#so anyways don’t mind me. vibrating into another dimension with anticipation for the next 11 days#it’s insane man. a year ago i Never ever woulda thought i’d be so invested in this game. and it took Months for the game to really grab me#but i’m v glad i kept coming back even when i was struggling to really get into it. like i just had this feeling that if i stuck around and#gave the game a chance to really like. come into its stride. i just always felt like there was Something there and i just hadn’t found it#and holy shit i finally found it in Penacony. the devs really truly outdid themselves with this region and these characters and this story#not to discount everything that’s happened prior. like i was genuinely Liking it all before now but i wasn’t Loving it y’know#but that may be more a ‘me having to fight tooth n’ nail to force myself to consume new media’ thing than it is a matter of the actual game#anyways i came here to talk abt the program! bc since i’m not filming my HSR stuff i’m gonna be insufferable abt it on Tumblr instead ! :)#and i’m probably not filming any more Genshin stuff. or anything else at all for that matter but let’s not talk abt that dead dream#pun not intended lmao. Anyways let’s return to the subject at hand while there’s still room left in these tags shall we#i’m so fucking glad they had Aventurine on this program man. especially since he’s leaked to only have 18 lines in 2.2… it was nice to see-#-him here at least 🥹 i’ll take what i can get. his unenthusiastic little bird noises at the beginning.. him being reluctant to come out..#the way one of the first things to come out of his mouth was ‘y’know DR RATIO once told me…’ like boy we get it ur in love with him 🙄 (/J!)#i love how they can’t go on these programs w/o talking abt each other it’s adorable. AND THE WAY HE WAS THE ONE TO EXPLAIN BOOTHILL’S KIT!?#they can’t just fuel my crackship like this… god and his whole ‘muddle-fudger.. son-of-a-nice-lady?’ thing had me wheezing#Aven mocking Boothill’s inability to curse was not on my special program bingo card but fuck i’m here for it#and Robin being all curious abt him was so cute.. ‘who /is/ he? … does he order milk at the bar?’ i’m crying she’s so sweet#also the trailer was fucking insane. which feels redundant as hell bc all of HoYo’s version trailers go hard but like. still. wow.#that millisecond long shot of Boothill surveying the skyline is so fucking good. also what the fuck is Jing Yuan doing here!!#not complaining at all tho. we’ve got JY & DH(IL?). Argenti(?). Boothill. Sunday. Aven. all my men r here and i am eating so fucking good#Seven.txt#viddy game stuff
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
I could talk for a whillee abt how good I think family in flames was in fh s1
#i.really love the jail scenes. perfect mixture of funny escape scenes#and inncrredible scenes with the parents.#i think fig and sandralynn at this time are so interesting how fig rejects her reaching out and how sandralynn looked just like fig when she#was younger... the clear sadness of sandralynn that fig pushes her away again. the blame fig puts on her for gorthalax leaving#SOOO GOOD#amd then the fabian and bill scene BROTHER.....#i fucking LOVE that scene and what i love so much is they never get a chance to even talk abt it before hes killed#bc bill starts the fight but fabian finishes it its all fabians frustration and i reallylike when bill tries to get up after fabian stops#and fabian just beats him fown again LOVE IT SO BAD people do not talk abt it enough#and like thats only the prison scenes. the scene where adaine finds out shes the oracle is sooo good and WHERE THEY FINF OUT GOLDENHOARD god#ITS SO GOODDD the reveal is so crazy good#AND THEN THEEEE FJCJVNGJ. THE ATTACKS ON THE HOUSES. its genuinely so fucking stressful they need to do more shit like that i rememeber#shitting myself watcjing it likeee#fabians scenes CRAZY going for his mother and his fatehr dies#EMILY FIRST TIME CRYING ON D20 AND IT WAS SO GOOD her and her mommmmm..... she realises how shes just a personnn...oh i feel ill#figs reluctance tk go to the faeth house at all.Ugh.UGHHHH#RIZ FINDINNG OUT ABT HIS DADDDD oh my lorddd#anywayUmm to anyone who read this..im so sorry i love to talk
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
Something that makes reading TOA so devastating is how fucking much Apollo feels about Everything. There’s so MUCH. Like I don’t even know how to describe it to you if you haven’t read the books yourself. He has so many complicated thoughts and emotions about just about everything and he cares about everything so much and there is just SO MUCH going on in his head. And yet none of it ever reaches his mouth!!
He almost never says what he’s feeling. What little comes out of his mouth about his thoughts barely even scratches the surface of what he actually means. Like he’ll be having a long ass monologue about how incredible someone is, showing a deep understanding of them as a person and empathizing with them so hard you’d almost think it’s projection but it’s not he’s legitimately just mind melding with this random person he met like a week ago and he’s thinking the softest, kindest thoughts about them like he knows they’re fucking incredible - and what comes out of his mouth is just like, “you’re a wonderful friend :)” AND ITS LIKE. THERES SO MUCH MORE UNDER THE SURFACE. the sheer admiration and adoration he has for everyone around him……… UGHHH!!! But he never VOICES ANY OF IT!!!!!! He never tells anyone about what Zeus did to him……. He never tells anyone except the reader about his realization that Zeus is abusive…. He never even tells commodus about how much he adored him, not then and not now… he refuses to tell anyone when he’s in pain or tries to justify the things he does when he actually had Decent Reasons for why he did something… I’m. I’M. AUGH. AHHHHH
HE DOESN’T EVEN TELL US ALL OF HIS THOUGHTS IS THE THING. THERES EVEN MORE THAT HE IS NOT TELLING US!!!!! THE FUCKING OCEAN OF FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS HE HAS ABOUT EVERYTHING IS THE CLIFF NOTES VERSION. I AM IN DISTRESS.
And YET…. Even what slips out of his mouth is so fucking devastating it is SO devastating. He’s so fucking kind and gentle with Harley and Meg and and other younger Demis and his kids… he’ll act like an obstinate idiot and then turn around say something that drags the core of the person he’s talking to into the light like nail on the fucking HEAD like he reached into their soul and gave them the words to express something that they were struggling to say aloud or that they didn’t even realize about themself. Around the 2nd book he starts putting voice to some of his feelings and thoughts about others and even that tiny fucking sliver is overwhelming to the people he’s talking to bc he’s SO. AUGHHHH
#this is why ‘reading the TOA books’ fics fucking slap btw. because as embarrassing as his thoughts can be#so many of them are just incoherent screaming about how he loves everyone around him. devastating#like imagine helping out ur loser deadbeat dad who you don’t really know much about bc he’s flighty and hard to read#and finding out ‘wow he cares about us a lot more than I thought’#bc he literally almost dies to save you/your siblings and keeps following you all around everywhere#but he’s still like. your weirdo absentee dad. u don’t know hardly anything new about him other than an apparent suicidal streak#and then u find out that the whole time he was whining about chicken nuggets or whatever he was internally sobbing abt how much he loves u#and every time u were nearby he was going ‘MY BEAUTIFUL PERFECT BABY… JUST AS INCREDIBLE AS THEIR MORTAL PARENT!!!! BEAUTIFUL LIKE THE SUN!#HOW DID I EVEN MAKE SUCH A BEAUTIFUL PERFECT BABY. UNREAL. THEY CANT BE MINE!? BUT THEY ARE!!! LOOK AT THEMMM!!?!!! IM SO PROUD……#my beautiful perfect angels… all of their parents best traits and none of our worst…. I am Barely restraining myself from sobbing#i would give u the WORLD if my father wouldn’t kill me for it :(‘#and it’s like. wow. okay dad. um. would have been nice to know that when we were all dying in The War#Please Hug Me Though.#imagine being a Random Ass Demigod who didn’t go on a big special quest or something like you are literally just Some Guy#and finding out that this weirdo loser god u gave a sandwhich to or something thinks you are so fucking cool#your own parent doesn’t know ur name but Apollo knows u on sight and read ur soul within the 2 seconds yall talked and he thinks you rock#how are you supposed to respond to that.#snack time#toa#longpost
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
every time i am around older queer people the more i am convinced i was meant to be an older queer person. not bc i have this fantasy of living in decades past that were much worse but bc i get along with and agree w them so much better. so much of modern queer discourse is painfully white, binary, and completely regressive while painting itself as revolutionary and i just want to crack jokes w some cool older butch lesbians every time i encounter discourse that makes me want to bash my head into the wall
#my professor in this one class is a lesbian in her 60s#and so many times she will say things that immediately either piss off or confuse the very lgbtqia+ alphabet mafia crowd in the class#while im sitting there like no no let her speak shes literally correct#and do not mistake me i am accepting of my lot in life as a 24 year old dyke okay i know the community i am going to be in and around#and love them all dearly and will stick up to their right to exist#but i will say. some of them annoy the living fuck out of me and we cannot have productive conversations#bc i always end up feeling like i need to take a walk to calm myself lmfaoooooo#AND ANOTHER CLARIFICATION BC WE NEED 20 CAVEATS ON TUMBLR.COM#this is not abt r//adical feminism im not talking abt transgender ppl existing as smth that annoys me abt the modern community#i just think older queer people actually have their heads screwed on and don't get as caught up in The Bullshit as we do#and i envy them for it
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
I slept nearly 11 hours and I'm STILL upset and angry, and further upset and angry with myself for letting it get to me, and it's just >:(
#franposting#its ok. i had a coffee. am reading Naruto.#going to mass soon (woo slacker sleep in mass time)#gonna work on my cross stitch this afternoon#do some meal prep. either make some pasta salad or maybe a zucchini skillet#maybe some homemade mac and cheese bc im sad#idk cook smthn#then ofc play more bg3#and ignore my stupid dumb mean family#my mothers displeasure is more known today#and its like. i literally was talking about how shes become kinder this week. wrt queer ppl on tv#and then. the irony of it all. everything is fine as long as its not me ig#shout out to my father who has soooo many problems but is at least being good abt this#but. yeah. im. upsetti#but also already dreaming of fillin in the half sleeve. i need sunflowers and dandelions. hellebore and lilies. bees!!!#all those hopeful lovely things for my soul#im also gonna get another helix piercing i think. in the opposite ear. more of a cuff style#its just. fuck it. im tired of squishing myself into a lil box for literally no reason#no moral reason no social reason just shitty fear and family
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
Depression is all fun and games until your skipping school even though you’re weeks behind because you quite literally can’t get out of bed
#god I hate it here#not to mention you mother and father#SEEING this#simply decides to ignore you like your Alr dead#like damn okay 💀💀 fuck you too ig 💀💀#I don’t know how to fix this#I’m literally gonna be held back or taken to court bc I’ve missed so many days#but oh well the sillies r keeping me alive#Also I told myself I wouldn’t vent online anymore but I honestly don’t care anymore 😭#it’s so bad though#I tried to do some of my homework last night and ended up throwing up from the stress#and it’s not like my friends just forgot about me they are GOOD friends I’ve just been pushing them away; telling them I’m just sick etc.#it’s my fault so I’m not mad at them for not knowing what to do. The closest ones try to call me#sometimes I answer and we talk. sometimes I don’t and they leave me a message abt how their a good listener and they KNOW something’s wrong.#Truly I love my friends but at this point I just need to be medicated or in a mental institution ong#but again; it’s not like my parents actually care. they canceled my therapy that was court appointed to me#My support system otherwise is gone; my older siblings have moved out and I’m supposed to protect my younger ones from my parents#but deadass my entire family is well aware that I’m useless in that department#I shake scream and sob everytime my parents yell at us so I’m no help; really#I mean recently I’ve been able to keep my emotions under control but the only reason why is because I’m dead inside 💪#As I’m typing this out I’m realizing that I should be telling the world this especially not in my mental state but like. I dunno 🤷♂️#I know most of you don’t care or if you do your just concerned or feel bad bc you know what it’s like and I thank you.#seriously; I thank you for being human and reminding me the world can be kind#if anything im just distracting myself from whatever this is. whether it be playing a silly game or drawing about said silly game it helps#but it also makes me feel guilty bc I RLLY should be focused on trying to pass this year. but I’m pretty sure it’s too late now.#anyways; that’s why I’ve been inactive lately so I apologize#it’s funny bc I’m typing this out but I rlly don’t feel anything while explaining this to you guys#I’ll tag this properly; I don’t know why I’m posting this and I might delete it later I dunno#tw vent#tw mention of abuse
14 notes
·
View notes
Note
I’d love to learn more about Dusk! Could I ask for some general info about him?
Of course! Dusk is one of my own personal favorites, not that I don’t love them all (except Boss and Snare they should die and explode forever /hj), but he’s just such a sweetheart and deserves the world <3
On the surface, Dusk actually doesn’t have a “proper” job. He is, unfortunately, way too disabled to do much of anything in any structured way, and spends most of his time really just figuring out how to live as comfortably as possible.
That being said, he and Eclipse have found and developed a number of accommodations for both his physical and psychological problems so he can still do things he enjoys! Which would mostly be gardening, cooking and baking, and taking care of cats. He can’t really read anymore, since his visions not great the majority of the time, but text to speech devices help a ton, so he can still enjoy all sorts of books. He’s working on being okay with movies.
He’s got a lot of appreciation for the world, and loves learning about everything and anything, so he’s always listening keenly whenever Eclipse returns from one of his ventures with stories and pictures.
He’s got a slow, easy life, and far prefers keeping to himself, though he’d do better if he had a few close friends (for example, in a “capricious skeletons” setting, where they all live together, he’d actually do really well making friends with some of the others, and would deeply appreciate the company).
It shouldn’t be any surprise he favors strays and older cats or cats with health problems, and they usually house anywhere between three to ten cats at any given time. Dusk is incredibly mindful of them and likewise, they take just as good care of him.
He requires a lot more sleep and physical rest than your average Papyrus, and sleeps in large “nests” rather than a bed, since it’s easier on his large, lanky frame, but you can imagine how much the cats adore this, and they can often be found napping around or even on him while he rests.
He has a not so secret soft spot for fantasy adventure type stories, so Eclipse likes to gift him all sorts of silly little (useful) knickknacks along that theme (like a sword styled letter opener, or a “crystal ball” paper weight). His brother doing this amuses him far more than the actual gifts, but he appreciates them very much all the same.
He likes to mend things, to what end he can. Broken planter, chipped cup, torn clothes; if it’s salvageable, and he can physically manage it, he’ll do his best to fix it. Even if it can’t be used for the same purpose anymore, something must be completely exhausted from all potential use before he’s truly willing to part with it. (Gee, wonder why…)
#had to stop myself from going on bc I would talk abt him for hours if I could#paragraph after paragraph#he’s so wonderful dusk I love you <333#I mean like. He’s super fucked up and did willingly eat people but. Circumstances yk#he’s never done anything wrong ever actually#Anyway. <3 ty 💫#hf dusk#horrorfell#horrorfell papyrus#yuckydraws#clear sky sunset#sorry the sketch is rough I had to leave. for an appointment </3#please imagine like five cats snuggled w/ him#capricious skeletons#sort of. close enough
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
“a mothers love is the best uty track” “retribution is the best uty track” “gift is the best uty track” WRONG!!!!! organ demo
#I am joking of course but dalvs organ demo he keeps in his room is very important to me#bc dalvs arc is all abt self improvement both in regards to his mental health and his hobbies/talents#taking the harsh truth from#penilla and working on improving his art#keeping hold of his amateur organ recording because it could be great some day. and in the pacifist ending we see that firsthand#w/ him finally being confident enough to perform it to the world#like as someone who is kind of fucking going thru it rn both mentally and in trying to express myself fully in my art. seeing him thrive in#the true pacifist ending makes me so happy#yeah that’s right we’re talking about DALV. I love dalv he was honestly my favourite character until the last chunk of pacifist jumped in#with ceroba
5 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
retroeule
Secretly a bunch of owls in a trenchcoat.
harnessmcmanemy
无标题
sintiquefaria
SeNtiMeNtoS
semsemaamr
semsema amr
