#honorable mention of damien but i relate to him too much to be able to watch him do anything i find embarrassing | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

weebsinstash · 8 months

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On the other hand, being someone who is chill with being average and a little weird is pretty comforting, albeit not as relatable or drama material. Like you have those insanely smart adopted family members, who are brooding, cool, fight crime, are insanely smart, privileged, rich and accomplished meanwhile Batsis is like,

"I watched some cool True Crime documentaries and helped Albert- Alfred with the laundry. Sorry about your shirt, Damien, added too much bleach. By the way, look at this drawing I made with a following a Bob Ross tutorial on YouTube! Looks kinda wonky but I made it myself, kinda proud of it. No mistakes, just happy accidents. Haha! :)"

By the very next morning Bruce has that shit framed on either on his desk or on the wall in his office and smiles every time he looks at it. Damian is examining the painting, "ah I see--" and waxing poetic about the different little experiential painting techniques you used on the canvas, Dick and Jason and the rest tease you about getting an exhibit at the Gotham art gallery

Like don't get me wrong I tend to write Reader inserts who are typically average (although I'd like to write a few more power fantasies lol) but I just. I feel like any feelings of inadequacy would be amplified by living with this family. For example, I get anxiety and guilt sometimes just knowing if a large or expensive gift has been gotten for me, feeling guilt about it. Just your every day to day life in the Wayne manor would occasionally be filled with all kinds of large and small splendors. A small walk through the house, passing under the crystal chandelier in the grand lobby. A weekly family dinner with actual silverware handed down for generations. Just the ever looming watchful eye of a literal actual butler, a trained professional butler who's been in service for this family almost his entire life

If anything else, I feel like you'd want to contribute in some way. Help around the house, help as a vigilante, do SOMETHING to "pay them back" which Bruce doesn't want to hear any of and also like. Realistically, if we're saying he's full yandere and you're either his adopted kid or a platonic family member or like even a romantic partner, and he's getting you gifts and taking you on trips and stuff, like. The amount of money being spent on you is a figure you will never in your life be reasonably able to pay back and it would STILL be pocketchange to him

You're just like have PANIC ATTACKS out of guilt and shame and you mention the money to Bruce and he's like "oh that? Psssh" like it's. It's nothing to him. It's more money you could make in your entire lifetime and it's nothing to him

Hey, here's a somewhat related and juicy idea. Recently I was thinking of a concept where Reader is a Gotham vigilante, educated and maybe from a well-off family but like, middle class suburbia kind of wealth, not billionaire Bruce Wayne rich. You eventually find yourself catching the eye of both him AND Catwoman and, kind of actually start having a rapport with both of them. You bump into each other on a mission, help each other out, are impressed with each other's work, and suddenly you're bumping into them out on patrol a lot more. Catwoman starts being openly flirtatious with you while Bat simply just, his shift in demeanor is more subtle for people who aren't familiar with him but. Essentially he actually talks to you now, he won't just be silent and mechanical, he'll communicate and banter and make small talk rather than just ordering you around and speaking solely about the current task at hand or future missions.

I picture everyone on a rooftop in the middle of a stakeout and it eventually becomes small talk to pass the time as you almost do a double take when THE Batman starts making idle chit chat with you (really more of you AND Cat, but you being included at all is kind of an honor, really). He's just looking through his binoculars and without moving "any plans for the rest of the evening" and Catwoman looks at her nails and he sees her throw a very obvious Look over to you "well there's a stray little kitty in my neighborhood I've been meaning to scoop up" and she's been calling you Kitty/Kitten so this whole convo has a double meaning for fucking you OR kidnapping you at this point, and you're just like, in full professional mode replying without any hint of sarcasm "that's good, a lot of people don't recognize the dangers of outdoor cats and the significant ecological impacts they can have on their local environments" and Batman is repressing a smirk as Cat is huffing because oh my god now she has TWO dense cuties to look after 😩 (bonus scene where Bruce catches you smirking and realizes you were politely putting her off or at the very least trying to make her focus on the mission and he smiles to himself about what a clever little jokester you are)

Basically the two of them start deciding they want you to be the filling in that BatCat sandwich and just. Imagine they're trying to seduce you and taking their clothes off and Bruce takes off his mask and you're just like "Whoa whoa whoa hold up, BRUCE WAYNE?" And like. YOU INSTANTLY HATE HIM, the switch FLIPS. You either have extremely personal beef with him like his company laid off a parent of yours and sent your family into poverty, or you just like, legitimately ethically hate him as a person, as this billionaire playboy. Like imagine the disgust if he kisses you as Batman and you think it's so hot and romantic and later on its revealed he's Bruce Wayne, who is notoriously An Enormous Manwhore who has kissed like tons and tons of women and been in all these love scandals. I'd feel GROSS?

Like literally you'd go from "oh my god Batman 🥰 he's so cool and dark and mysterious, I have so much respect for him, he works so hard, he's so smart, not everyone can do what he does" to "of fucking course it would be someone like you. Billionaire running around with his custom-made toys. Of course it's you, who else could AFFORD all this shit? No wonder the police just let you do whatever, you could just pay them off anyways! You'd never be arrested and go to jail and be punished like the rest of us, for anything! Of course you're running around in a suit beating people up, men like you always think they can just do whatever they want!!"

Like imagine you were literally about to fuck both of them and you take one look at their faces, "you're a billionaire and you're a millionaire" and just. Leave. Like they're both shocked and appalled because you just DROP THEM for stuff they kinda basically can't control (although a lot of it is like ethics of what they do and have they gain their wealth) and suddenly they're, showing up at your place of employment for lunch or a day-trip, you're trying to do hero patrols alone and one or both of them pops up to try and invite themselves along to qhayever you're doing (which would especially suck because like, Batman specifically could probably do everything you're doing and better so I imagine working in front of him would be extremely nerve-racking. You're just like trying to rewire a circuit board to hack a door and he just points over your shoulder "actually it's that wire" kind of shit and you have to either let him follow you or look like a massive asshole as you tell him to fuck off, which he might even refuse to do, stating that if this is to save lives or whatever then you need his help

Like legit, Vigilante Reader feels like these two rich freaks have basically been toying with you like some kind of pet and in an attempt to cut them out of your life you drive them to actually dig their claws deeper. Bruce meets Selina for coffee to decompress and he's all "so what have you been up to" since she's got this odd little smirk, "oh ive been feeling just awful lately about this little kitty running around all lonely in my nsighborhood so i just HAD to adopt them" and she just hands him her phone with a picture on it and it's. You with a little diamond studded collar that says something dehumanizing like Kitty or Kitten or Baby on it while you've clearly been crying and are maybe even visibly restrained and Bruce is just like "🙄 Selinaaaaa.... can I come visit to 😳 see this cat tho"

#yandere batman #yandere x reader #personally i think being fucked by both of them would be a religiois experience but also intimidating as fuck #man i got some ideeeeas for being caught between these two #yandere stuff #sinprompts

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stay-outta-my-blood-circle · 2 years

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Finished BTD2. Thoughts. You know the drill (no pun intended). This one was tough!!

BTD1 ver \ TPOF ver

Cain

I didn't think he was all that interesting when I first saw him.

The fact that he is apparently my favorite was not known to me until the creation of this list, just now.

But maybe that's not such a surprise because he's actually got a lot in common with Rire (despite being a fallen angel rather than a demon).

Like Rire, he seems to enjoy the finer things, he's jaded, and more importantly: you have to keep his interest, and he gets bored easily.

Unlike Rire, he's pretty serious by nature (therefore more difficult to entertain and less inclined to put up with 'misbehavior'), practically forlorn even.

Also unlike Rire, though, I think he's more able/likely to become truly fond of someone. He's downright soft once you win him over.

Wings pretty. Hair nice.

I'm also a sucker for the whole 'call me anytime you need help, I'll swoop in and defend you' kind of thing 🥰

First ending: "Cain dropped you"

Favorite ending: either "Cain saved you" or "Cain saw your value"

8.5/10 I'll take him

Lawrence

Baby boy. Baby.

So sweet and anxious. Doesn't want to hurt you but does want to remove your spine and keep it. Loves you so much he wants to (literally) climb inside your ribcage but also can't believe anyone could truly love him back 🥺

someone get this man a psychiatrist

The little sad smiles, the mutters, the blushes. I could just eat him up fr

First ending: "he took you to the woods"

Favorite ending: "Lawrence got closer" or "Lawrence kept you"

*gently holds* 8/10

Damien

Gets a special mention despite not technically having his own route because I love him, your honor

I do have a weakness for grumps so this is not shocking

Another fallen angel, related to Cain. An all around good boy despite being kinda cranky. Also a priest if that does anything for you.

You get a nice epilogue with him if you let him rescue you!!

7.5/10, glad the boyfriend he apparently has doesn't keep him from fooling around with me 😏

Vincent

Went back and forth on him a lot throughout his route

Me when he first appeared on screen: 😳 awooooga!!

Highest percentage of death endings, I think. Yikes. He's easy to piss off.

Big stronk. muscles. scars

I like his personality too. Playful, flirty, and generally easygoing as long as he's not angry.

Protective, loyal, and affectionate (once you win him over), and probably a lot of other traits one could ascribe to a pet dog because.... werewolf

Some of his endings actually gave me feels. He can be very sweet.

Lets you wear!! His clothes!! Because they look good on you and also yours smell good so he wants to keep them! 😖

Some uh. rough kinks 😬 just ignore those I guess

The best ending you can get with him is also poly, which is very cool, because he already kinda has a bf

BUT

I actually kinda dislike the bf so 😒 he's a brat and not in a fun way

First ending: "Vincent stepped in"

Favorite ending: "Vincent saved you"

*scritches ears* 7.5/10 (yeah he's tied with Damien, whatever. I can't choose)

Ren

I realize I picked a very cute CG but..... this little shit

Once again I'm going to piss off the fandom, because he's another major fan favorite

but he really is kind of a little shit. Also I'm sorry, he looks like he's 13 years old and the thirst train just cannot leave the station with him looking like that

I do sympathize with him and he certainly can be adorable. I'm perfectly happy to be kind to him when he's not zapping the ever-loving shit out of me 😠

I can't forgive him for what he did to my baby boy though!! Ever!!!! I hated playing that scene over and over jfc 😭

(also let me just say...... seeing that body he has in the freezer was so cathartic, I very nearly pointed and laughed)

First ending: "you took Law's place" (of course)

Favorite ending: "you helped Ren"

6/10 I do feel the urge to hug him when he cries

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sunflowershayne · 5 years

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mortal kombat au

bc i’m a dumb thot that’s severely attached to MK and smosh so.... uwu

ian hecox: liu kang. one of the most recognizable characters, generally considered the “hero” of the MK universe, one of the most powerful human characters, has fire magic and idk i just strongly relate ian to fire sometimes. also very fiercely protective of those he cares about, and will do whatever he can to help others. stubborn and vengeful, even when it can be petty.

noah grossman: ermac. has probably stolen at least 1,000 souls in his lifetime, has an unspeakable aura, has green magic (weed), has that one fatality where he takes out your stomach and noah is v picky so it fits i think. currently has free will and chooses his battles in self-preservation, and wants what’s best for his home and the world he grew up in. has a very strong connection to family due to having the former outworld king’s soul inside of him.

olivia sui: skarlet. is a very strange little creature with an obsession for others’ blood, one of the most powerful girls in the MK universe due to her magic, has the potential to take everything over but just wants approval. is also incredibly brutal but in a subtle way, has an ethereal and almost elegant way to her. basically i just see them both as weird gremlin women with insane amounts of power.

keith leak jr.: kung lao. very close with liu kang, iconic hat, is one of the more mundane humans due to not having a power, but is just as formidable as other kombatants due to his rage and his sheer knowledge of fighting. has a legacy he wants to live up to (the great kung lao is kinda like kung lao sr. right?), and is protective of his family (the shaolin monks). is generally more pissed off than liu kang.

courtney miller: cassie cage. sassy wlw (cassie’s not a confirmed wlw but like... come on, she’s. not straight), has latent magic within her, strong ties to her family, doesn’t rely on her power to fight with others despite being able to. strong badass woman that supports others, literally could kill a man by kicking them in the nuts. uwu-loving, selfie-taking, snapchat-filtering, ass-kicking lady that takes no prisoners.

shayne topp: johnny cage. muscular blond actor that is not-so humble about how they perceive themselves, very jokey and sarcastic, REFERENCES REFERENCES REFERENCES, pop culture, will flirt with anyone if it means he can be out of danger. consistently shirtless, but also incredibly loyal and steadfast, and has a very good heart. will do ANYTHING for his family and friends, including defeat a literal elder god in combat.

lasercorn: scorpion. fire man made of vengeance and anger, loves his clan more than anything, literal hellspawn, has a thing for sub-zero, is actually just a skull under a ninja mask, has actual flame hair, impulsive and has a short fuse. wants nothing more than to avenge his family and clan, and does absolutely anything he can to make sure that he gets what he wants. becomes besties with sub-zero (more than besties but like.... i’m not gonna say it Out Loud lest Ed Boon come murder me in my sleep!!!!!!!!)

jovenshire: erron black. gunslingin’ rowdy boy that tries to flirt with unsuccessful results, has his own interests and goals in mind when he makes decisions, chooses battles based on how much he can gain from each possibility. listens to country music and unironically does the boot-scootin’ boogie, has strong beliefs that people are allowed to make their own decisions and do what they want. a strangely coy and erotic cowboy.

mari takahashi: kitana. ethereal princess of an entire realm, goes from wanting to please others to making her own decisions and being loyal to herself, can kill a man with just a kiss, is besties (i mean in canon they’re dating but like. Not Here!!!!) with liu kang. has hopes for the future, will do whatever it takes to prevent bad things from happening, surprisingly very violent despite being so nice.

sohinki: sub-zero. generally a chill guy that will kick your ass mercilessly when given the chance, may or may not be lasercorn’s true enemy, initially was kind of a strict dude but now he’s just chill and wants to have a good time. always seems to show up whenever others need him, and basically just takes things in stride. all around good addition to a team, but can be stubborn and unmoving.

wes johnson: mileena. very giddy at first, but calms down a bit later on, desperately wants to be considered part of a family, has a strong temper and craves some sort of control, wants stability and prosperity for themselves. proud of their accomplishments and are always looking for people to acknowledge them, big eaters. is like a younger sibling that pesters you for candy. more powerful than they know.

boze: sonya blade. no-nonsense, won’t hesitate bitch, will kill you within a moment’s notice if you cross her, strong and independent with a soft spot for her friends, idk i just really associate boze with army green, was almost definitely a very emo teen. expects a lot from cassie but loves her with all her heart, is ride or die, ambitious and knows what she wants. go-getter through and through.

damien haas: kenshi. is almost definitely a psychic, values honor, besties with shayne, is a GOOD DAD!!!!!!! (fuck mkx’s portrayal of kenshi as a father tbh!!!!!!! takeda deserves better and SO DOES KENSHI!), is 1000% a cat person, has telekinesis probably, kitanas. knows a lot of shit, is lowkey shady af, helps scorpion in the new timeline (which... damien and lasercorn are... mind brothers), helps the Kombat Kids train bc they need it

flitz: kotal kahn. sun god, can and will turn into a lion at any moment, probably just glows sometimes for fun, is real into jade (which. aren’t we all.), is less interested in conquering and more into internal affairs and uniting people, proud of his body (bc kotal’s always shirtless, y’know.), would definitely drink blood for youth and sustenance. is able to teleport and has telekinesis, but it’s just w/e y’know!

rhett & link: raiden. the protector(s) of earthrealm and savior of the MK storyline, all-powerful immortal gods, are like WAY too fucking tall, did i mention that raiden is an elder god and that rhett & link literally saved our asses? gods, truly.

defy executives: shang tsung. old-ass, musty-ass, soul-stealing bitch, is liu kang’s arch-nemesis, brought sindel back to life which literally almost killed everyone in the MK timeline until they were brought back due to the time shenanigans. fuckin’ dusty soul-grabbing bastards that don’t even have good fatalities smh.

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lotrewrite · 7 years

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Well, here’s my comments! Feel free to message me with any questions or for clarification of anything

Overall, this is really solid you guys.

The biggest issue is just fleshing some of the episodes out a bit. Character arcs are nicely done and the character stuff is spread out surprisingly well. In general, I think there’s a little more focus on Mick and Len than the others, and Amaya could probably be given a slightly larger role, but overall I’m impressed. Writing a team and giving them all equal focus is really hard. I’m so excited this is already so good

(Also like three of these episodes are set in times/places related to special interests I’ve had over the years so if I start getting caught up in historical details that’s why)

I haven’t looked at other people’s feedback yet, cause I didn’t want to be influenced so sorry if I’m just repeating stuff

LOTREWRITE: Yay, more comments! Sorry about the delay in posting these, all!

Episode 1:

- I love the opening sequence with Kendra A+

- How has Nate’s pencil lasted so long? It has to be at least 20 years old, right? A pen might be more plausible but have the same basic narrative effect. If you’re keeping the dog tags bit from the original though it might be best to cut it the reference to it being from his grandfather entirely or have it be a replica or something. Best to focus on a single sentimental object.

- The banter is flawless and in character. Nice!

- Thawne’s explanation is a bit of an infodump. That’s gonna need to be reworked into more of a dialogue, at the very least. It would probably be better to show it somehow. Maybe show the Black Flash appearing a few seconds after Thawne leaves, then disappearing just as quickly? Darhk can research it on his own and then explain it to someone later, for those viewers who aren’t familiar with the concept from The Flash.

- “Damien Darhk?” Stein asks. “As in –” “The man who murdered your sister,” Rip says. I assume we’re talking about Laurel, but this makes it sound like Darhk murdered Stein’s sister.

- “I never did” Talk about OUCH. This is amazing.

Episode 2

- Some clarification on when and where “the infirmary” is would be good, as well as what Jax and Stein’s history here is, but I figure that will be added as this is fleshed out

- Same with “decision makers”

- I vote yes on “not drinking and driving” quip that’s excellent

- Bambi is adorable

- Make sure when you’re researching the crusades to look at things from multiple perspectives. This seems like it could very easily fall into a very generic “Good Christians” vs “Evil non-Christians” crusade narrative and that’s… less than ideal. There was a lot of politics surrounding the crusades, even if you’re just focusing on the Christians. That might also help provide a motive for your dissenter? Someone who thinks these soldiers should be back at home looking after things there instead of invading a foreign nation to secure power and riches for the church? Someone who’s been convinced that the crusaders have no divine right to this land and that they should leave it to the people who actually live there? Could maybe be a place to start setting up some doing what’s “right” vs doing what’s supposed to happen conflict? This is obviously just an outline so maybe you’re already planning something like that but I figured I’d mention it

- I’m a fan of Bambi not dying

- I love Firestorm as an angel that’s an amazing idea in so many ways A++++

- Mick roasting a T-Rex with his gun heck yeah

Episode 3:

- I love Sara’s canary pendant

- Continuity issue: in episode 1, Mick punches Rex and that’s about the extent of their interaction. Not much of a basis for the trust he seems to be showing in this ep.

LOTREWRITE: Possibly we could make it more explicit that Rex noticed that the bomb the JSA were tracking was discharged harmlessly after Mick said he went after it, thus the trust?

- Yay for bi Sara!

- The Sara and Amaya scene sounds like it’s gonna be so cute

- Ray’s speech to Nate about heroism is really solid

- I see now why it’s a pencil, but I’m still not loving the idea. Does it just magically never get not sharpened? Has Nate never noticed? Does he sharpen it and lose tiny fragments of the spear every time? Am I being too nitpicky?

- Love the mention of non-fighting military personnel

- Mick is starting to feel like he’s taking over the story a little too much here maybe, especially considering that he’s been the most major character in the previous episodes as well, while Jax and Stein seem almost nonexistent. Nate could probably have a little more prominence given that this is his big reveal episode.

Episode 4

- Might want to give a quick rundown of some basics about Chernobyl in the finished episode for audiences unfamiliar with the history. I had to look it up because I thought it happened years later and was very confused.

- Give some reason for why Stein’s actions were changed from the original timeline. Is Darhk’s presence there already changing things?

- What do you mean by Jax can “safely detonate” the bomb? Is there some reason he and Stein can’t Firestorm up and transfigure it? I don’t recall Jax being a particular expert in bombs previous to this.

- The Stein and Clarissa storyline is very very good

- Sara and Mick (not) talking about their shared grief Thank You

- Sara seems rather quick to trust Eobard. She knows it’s a speedster who killed Rex, right? Nevermind. She still seems very quick to trust for a former assassin.

- Maybe avoid Eobard villain monologuing? He has no reason to.

- Doesn’t the Black Flash only come after the speedsters, not anyone whose death is changed by time travel? iirc, both Cisco and Barry’s mother were brought back to life by Barry changing the timeline at one time or another and neither were targeted. There may be extenuating circumstances I’m forgetting though…

- Sara and Laurel’s storyline is really touching and sweet

- LISA!!!!!!

Episode 5

- I’m loving the mix of historically accurate costumes and especially Mick

- Crew interacting with Vikings is great and in character

- Jax and Gunlød’s relationship is really cute

- The funeral for Len and the others they’ve lost is fantastic

Episode 6

- Eobard and Darhk banter already sounds like it’s gonna be great

- How’s Lisa getting in? nevermind, that’s answered

- The image of Len doing anything “emphatically” is kinda cracking me up. A look or something would probably be more in character.

- Vampiric octopuses omg please have a flashback here

- Building of tension for the break-in is excellently done. A bit cliché, but in a good way.

- Lisa’s fury is great.

Episode 7:

- Oa?

- Independence Day banter is really fun

- Lisa/Cisco scene is YES

- “justified” I see what you did there

Episode 8:

- Remember to introduce Constantine etc to audiences who might not be familiar with them

- Are you going to show Mick vanishing or just have him suddenly no longer be there? Related: does he leave and then get beaten up or get taken out while with the rest of them? Does the audience know he’s telling the truth or will there be some room for them to wonder?

- HARLEY/IVY YESSSSS

- I’m assuming Booster is Booster Gold, yes? Do we get him in this season?! Okay coming back, we don’t. It’s a nice shoutout for those who know, but the prominence it’s given implies it will be relevant.

- Clarify who Resurrection Crusade are

Episode 9:

- Sara’s disguise for the Christmas party isn’t specified

- This might be an issue with the original version of the episode as well, but the colonies were in open rebellion against the British crown and GW probably wouldn’t expect honorable treatment or a prisoner exchange if captured. He was openly committing treason in the eyes of the British army.

- Ray navigating with one boot is hilarious and wonderful

- Would soldiers from the pre-telephone era be able to adjust well enough in one night to work with a comm? Guns they at least have experience with. Tiny devices that let them talk to each other through long distances might be a bit pushing it. Or I might be getting too nitpicky.

- �� The whole massacre plot needs some work tbh. How does Jax and Amaya knocking out a total of three soldiers stop a full massacre? How many were there? How did the soldiers feel about it? Sneak attacks on innocent (white) civilians weren’t really a common part of warfare at the time. Some or all of the villagers would have supported the British or at least pretended to. Not to mention the British soldiers were probably occupying the nearest village. Village sounds really feudal I’m thinking town might be more appropriate okay I’m definitely getting too nitpicky

- End scene is great

Episode 10:

- Ray’s pirate persona is gold

- Why do they ask Jax for his name first? (or do they?)

- Foreshadowing Rip joining the other side? Neat

- Looks like this just needs more details for the climactic battle then you’ll be good

Episode 11:

- The opening is so good

- Adorable engineering duo yes good

- So does the Greenpeace member know about the explosion? How?

- This episode feels a bit short? It’s focused on a single plot that gets resolved relatively straightforwardly. Maybe add subplot(s) and/or throw a wrench in things somewhere?

Episode 12:

- A little hard to follow at first but I think it’s supposed to be

- Does Mick say “who’s Grace?”? That seems to imply that he recognizes the other names.

- This has the potential to be really creepy I like it

- Can Rip be incorporated into this somehow? Or not necessarily be incorporated as the character, but at least mentioned? It feels relevant, since he had the closest relationship to Gideon

Episode 13:

- Could Legion!Len’s reveal be moved? If he’s not heavily involved in the Legion’s main plot for this ep, the previous ep would probably work better with a single big reveal (that oculus!Len is not just a hallucination) rather than two back to back. There could be mentions of a new Legion member (Darhk and Eo discussing Legends in Argentina “We’ll let the new guy handle them,” following orders from him, etc), without Len being revealed until he’s revealed to the Legends, or the end of this episode.

- Really good moral quandaries here.

- You could probably do something with the fact that the team (presumably intentionally) imitates oppressive government agents to get away with kidnapping, even if it is for a good cause. That’s gotta make them uncomfortable. (Mick seems like he’d probably be the most chill with it, Jax seems like he’d be really uncomfortable, and I could see Stein going either way.)

- Maybe include one or more OCs or historical figures in a major role to add a human element to the conflict

Episode 14:

- How does Rip find out? Does he already know?

- So is the thing on the throne not the spear piece?

- Tudor jewelry would probably not involve wood. They were big on showy jewels and metals. Maybe it’s in a fancy locket and rumored to hold part of the cross or something? You could have Anne make some sort of joke about how it’s probably fake. Artifacts like that were very common and almost never what they claimed to be.

- Henry’s feeling a little flat here, but that might just be the outline format

- This is another one that could use a subplot or two

- MICK BURNS DOWN THE GLOBE I LOVE IT

Episode 15:

- I like the option of Hex reacting badly to Rip

- Carter and Kendra cameo is really neat

- Continuity error: Len leaves and then says something in scene 6

LOTREWRITE: Len probably shouldn't leave since he has a big leaving sequence in the next episode

- Lots of good stuff here

- Make sure Lily stuff lines up with the following episode

LOTREWRITE: Lily should probably show up and have the argument with Stein in this episode, since the next one is very crowded

Episode 16:

- Make sure Lily stuff lines up with previous episode

- Bart Allen is from around this time period too. Can he cameo somehow?

- I love this entire concept

- All the hostages taken are women. Is there specific reasoning behind this? If not, maybe reconsider hostage choices

- So Lily is volunteering to be a hostage, not switch sides? That was a little unclear.

- I love the Monty Python joke. But it might be a little too anvil-y? Maybe change the wording from “what is your favorite color?” to “pick a color”?

- How are the trials being administered? Verbally with spoken answers? Touchscreen? Fancy buttons?

Episode 17:

- Cameo suggestion: A young Selina Kyle. The joke is that the found family she’s talking about consists entirely of cats. This can either be revealed to Jax via innocuous comment that wouldn’t make sense if referring to a human (something about litter boxes?) or revealed to the audience later when she looks at a picture in her wallet or something.

- I love Legion!Len being fed up this is a Good Scene

- The Legends make him cake aww

- That ending man

- Another episode that could use a bit of fleshing out. A little focus on what the other Legends are doing specifically might be enough.

Episode 18:

- Love the cold open

- Kendra cameo!

- Why would putting Ray in a toga convince the guard to let him pass?

- I’d add a subplot or a lot more happening at the gladiator fight. Does Darhk attempt to cheat? How does Sara counter that? Is she tempted to kill him? Maybe she could have a scene before or after where she talks to someone about her past with the League of Assassins and how sometimes she still has to fight those instincts? Even though she saved Laurel, he still almost killed her and Laurel is still almost completely out of reach for Sara so there’s got to be some pent-up anger there.

Episode 19:

- HI YES YOU’RE INCLUDING MORDRED LET ME LOVE YOU

- I can tell that you know your Arthurian legend or at least did some research this makes me so happy the Camelot episode was disappointingly generic in the official season but this is so much better

- MICK AND MORDRED TALKING ABOUT BEING TRUE TO YOURSELF I HAVE ASCENDED

- Yeah sorry I should have more constructive criticism but my brain kinda just starts screaming in delight at any mention of Mordred so just know that you did a good and there aren’t any glaring plot inconsistencies

Episode 20:

- Snart is totally dedicated to his theme enough to take Antarctica let’s be honest

- I believe there was a reference in a much earlier episode to Harley and Ivy both not returning someone’s calls. Did Harley do something to get back into the Legion’s good graces or…?

- Ted Kord :D

- This just needs more detail, in non-Len-related scenes in particular, which will presumably come with the full thing

Episode 21:

- How is Rip rescued?

- How does Ray contact GL and SS? Also, being in space shouldn’t keep them from being influenced by timeline change, since they’d still be within the bounds of time

- BATFAM!! (I was gonna say that it was surprising no one changed things to keep them from being vigilantes, but that could be because they have secret identities and none of the LoD knows who they are) (Also are you going to include Oracle? You might be able to tie her into Ray’s character arc, since she’s a superhero who not only doesn’t have powers, but is physically disabled.)

- How are you showing the spear going “fuck this“?

- Wait is the implication that pre-doomworld didn’t have Batman or was pre-Batman? Because the gameshow ep mentioned him in one of the trials

- I’m not sure about Sara being the one to throw Mick out. She is a former assassin, and she gave spear pieces to Thawne to save her sister earlier in the season. Seems like she would be among the more lenient. There should at least be some clarification of why. Maybe she’s upset because she was forced back into being an assassin?

Episode 22:

- “proper Time Master captain” ouch

- Sara’s scene with Laurel is lovely

- Why would Ray blow up if he touched the spear?

- “He holds up Cisco’s communication device with the” Finish this sentence

- LEN!!!

- This is a good ending

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