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jo-harrington · 2 months

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The Boy Is Mine (Jo's Edition)

Summary: A romantic night in at the trailer. And a first date.

Word Count: 1.7k

Themes: First Date, Fluff, First Kiss, Teasing, Banter, Geekery

Notes: My submission for @carolmunson's The Boy Is Mine Writing Excercise. This was a fun one, and I know the idea was for it not to be an AU...I guess technically it isn't (although I definitely thought of my STFF Eddie who...well...it's fanfiction *wink* especially since we're not gonna see their first date in the story). Thank you for putting together a fun game Carol.

Tagging a few friends who I think would have some great additions to this prompt: @eddiemunsonbignaturals @undead-supernova @storiesbyrhi

You can find my masterlist here.

Please do not interact if you are not 18+.

Enjoy!

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Pizza? Delivered.

Twinkies? Vanilla frosting. Not Banana.

Trailer? Tidied.

Sheets? Changed.

There was a knock at the door and Eddie took a breath and held it as he stared at his bed.

"You're not gonna end up in here," he muttered to himself.

Ok but maybe you would. He could be hopeful. Maybe a kiss would lead to something else.

"No idiot. It's just a study date."

There was another knock and he turned on his heel and rushed for the door.

He paused at the last second--glanced around, ran his hands over the front of his t-shirt, and put the most casual smile on his face--before he opened the door.

And then there you were.

A backpack slung over your shoulder, 6-pack of Dr. Pepper hanging from your fingers, looking...hot effortlessly gorgeous...or at least he thought so.

"Hey," you greeted. "Sorry if I'm late."

"No," he shook his head quickly and shifted to the side to let you pass into the trailer. "Right on time sweetheart. Hope you like pepperoni."

Of course you did. It was your favorite.

"It's my favorite."

Eddie clenched his fist in victory as he shut the door and then stood back and watched indulgently as you took in the wonders of the place he called home. He committed it all to memory; the way your eyes lingered on Wayne's collection of mugs and hats from over the years, or your nose scrunched up cutely at the sight of family pictures on a shelf--

Please god, don't see the picture of him missing his two front teeth.

--or the way it scrunched further, more in annoyance than fondness, and your eyebrow quirked at the stack of video tapes beside the television.

Shit.

"Uh," he cleared his throat and swooped in, arm hovering around your shoulders as he led you to the couch where the pizza and his history homework waited. His hand drifted to yours so he could grab the sodas. "Lemme put this in the fridge so it gets cold. I have Mountain Dew...or beer, if you want one."

"Mountain Dew's fine."

"As you wish," he bowed and you giggled. He cursed himself as he headed to the kitchen.

What a fucking nerd--

"So you read the Princess Bride?" you called out to him.

"Y-yes."

"It's one of my favorite books! A story within a story and all of that. And it can be critical of itself. It's perfect!"

Eddie's heart soared.

The two of you went back and forth for a few minutes discussing the merits of the book and the way it provided so much suspense and adventure and escapism; something it seemed, and Eddie wasn't surprised to find, you both had needed throughout your relatively-young lives.

Before long, he shuffled out of the kitchen with two cans and two solo cups to find you comfortably settled on the couch with your legs criss-crossed and a throw pillow settled in your lap. You looked right at home, at ease with him, and he had to say...he liked that sight quite a bit.

"I ran out of like, nice cups," he changed the subject so he wouldn't focus too much on how much he enjoyed the sight. "Hope this is okay."

"Ok, well what are the nice cups?" you narrowed your eyes at him playfully. "Because I see plenty of nice cups right in front of us, Mister."

You gestured at the shelves lined with mugs and Eddie couldn't help but roll his eyes at you.

"Those aren't nice cups Madam," he scoffed. "Those are family heirlooms. The nice cups are the Star Wars: Return of the Jedi glasses I got from Burger King. Obviously."

"Well excuse me," you straightened in your seat and rocked your shoulders back and forth haughtily. "The fine crystal."

"And don't you forget it."

"And here you are, presenting me with...plastic. Like a peasant."

"If you don't stop, we're gonna have a problem."

He held out the red solo cup filled with fluorescent green liquid and you snatched it from him with a quick flash of your tongue.

Then the two of you got right down to business: homework.

You pulled a small notebook from your backpack and then asked to see his notes from class so you could help him get a better idea of what was important for an upcoming quiz that he'd mentioned the day prior. He was ashamed to say he wasn't the best notetaker, but you pivoted easily as you flipped through a few pages and went from sparse notes about Civics and the US Constitution to long drawn out paragraphs about the Riders of Rohan and graphic descriptions of the Meduseld.

"Don't be like that," you scolded him. "That's not even true. What is this?"

"This?" He waved dismissively. "It's just...notes for Hellfire. Ahem...Hellfire Club...my Dungeons and Dragons club at school."

"Oh yeah?"

"Planning a one-shot for my buddy Jeff's birthday in a world where Theodred doesn't die and goes on to become...well...it's just nerd stuff."

Eddie sniffed and thought back to the many times that he'd been cut short trying to explain his ideas to others; even Ronnie got on his case when he got too into it.

How many times had she heard him get into an argument with himself over the benefits of Mithril vs. Adamantium?

"Excuse me," you looked at him expectantly, breaking through his thoughts. "Nerd stuff?"

"Yeah," he shrugged and let out a self-deprecating laugh. "Nerd stuff. We're supposed to be focusing on History."

"Ok, yes but..." you reached out and poked him in the the dimple in his cheek. "You didn't say in a 'we should just focus on history instead' way. You said it in a 'you don't want to hear about this' way."

"Well do you? Do you actually like that?""

"Did I not just tell you that Inigo Montoya is the real hero of Princess Bride and not Westley or Buttercup not five minutes ago?"

Eddie stared at you like a deer in the headlights.

Ok. You got him there.

But...but...God...old habits died hard.

How many times had people not given him the time of day when it came to silly little stories and make believe worlds? How many times had the people closest to him not even taken the time to listen?

He'd already been sold on the fact that you weren't just a dream; how could you be real and actually be his dream girl too?

God, it was too good to be true.

Eddie swallowed hard and centered himself back in reality. He was gonna have to salvage this moment before he made a real fool out of himself and asked you to marry him or something. That would be a little too strong for a first date...and a study date, at that.

He grumbled something under his breath.

"'Scuse me? What was that?" you leaned in closer to him.

"It was 10 minutes ago," he spoke up, staring at you matter-of-factly, a fiery challenge in his eyes to hide the fact that he was actively falling for you. "Actually."

You threw your head back in a laugh and slapped the back of your hand against his shoulder.

"You shithead," you cackled. "Ok fine. 10 minutes. Now. How about we actually study for 10 more minutes, and then you can tell me about this...Dungeons and Dragons while we eat ok?"

He happily agreed.

Towards the end of the night, pizza and sodas had been devoured, homework demolished, and Eddie actually felt like he had a shot at getting a decent grade on his next History quiz.

"Alright," he sighed and leaned against the back of the couch. "I think we're done here. A success if I do say so myself. I guess I'll keep you around."

"Keep me?" you quirked an eyebrow at him. "Uh huh, more like, will you please come back and help me study again?"

"Are..." Eddie scoffed. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah."

"You volunteered!"

"I volunteered for one study date."

"What, so a second one is out of the question?" he asked as he leaned forward and edged into your space.

"Well," you began with an expression that oozed contemplation in an exaggerated fashion. God, you were almost as dramatic as he was.

You were perfect.

"Well, if you're asking me for a second date, Edward? Then the answer is yes."

He clapped his hands together and laughed.

"Haha, see I knew that you couldn't get enough of--"

"But," you stopped him, and he stared, open-mouthed with words half-falling from his lips. "If you're asking me to come back to study? Well, then the second session is gonna cost you."

And he fell for it for a second. Just a split second. He thought that yeah it made sense if he wanted your help, he was gonna have to give something in return.

But then he saw the sly little smile that you were fighting to keep off your lips, saw the adorable little scrunch in your nose that he'd memorized earlier in the night, and the way your fingers fiddled on the couch cushion, as you slowly inched closer to him.

And he understood.

Oh...

"Oh yeah?" He narrowed his eyes at you in faux-suspicion. "Alright...name your price."

"It's not gonna be cheap," you insisted.

"I can pay anything."

"You sure about that?"

"Oh," he leaned closer to you now, volume and timber getting lower the closer he got. "I'm absolutely sure sweetheart."

You bit your lip slyly.

"I think fair market price...is a kiss."

"Just one?" he teased, lips absolutely within smooching distance from yours now.

"Maybe two."

You bit your lip to keep your smile at bay and Eddie had to stop himself from kissing you right then and there.

"Two?! Well," he sighed. "You drive a hard bargain. And who am I to pass up such a once-in-a-lifetime deal?"

"Just a nerd," you whispered against his lips.

"Just a nerd," he repeated, and then slotted his lips right against yours, ending your perfect first date with the perfect first kiss.

Just like on TV.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #prompt game #the boy is mine #stff updates #stranger than (fan)fiction #carol <3

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a-kind-of-merry-war · 3 months

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GUYS I just found a store that makes armour leggings, dresses, tops etc that look like actual historical armour and I need all of it RIGHT NOW, and also IT COMES IN PLUS SIZE

It's called Lorica Clothing and LOOK

#fashion #clothing #historical fashion #leggings

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dinoshimaaa · 1 year

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had a little brainrot about something. you know how in the interdarshan competition event happening later in the update, wanderer will most likely be representing the vahumana darshan which specialises in history and social sciences? makes me think…

hear me out, history major!kuni who doesn’t really have a lot of friends and sits by himself in the lecture hall, but nevertheless gets good grades for all his assignments.

history major!kuni who just shrugs when you ask for his secrets on how to score in quizzes and assignments and probably just goes “just study it’s not that hard”.

history major!kuni who acts nonchalant about his major but is secretly a huge history geek.

history major!kuni who, upon seeing some online user misunderstand the history of a certain time period in inazuma, is quick to berate them by typing out a 5 page long essay as to why the user is invalid and therefore he should cease to exist, under the reddit username u/TheBalladeer6.

history major!kuni who studies alone in cafes and libraries, so no one ever notices the subtle sparkle in his eyes whenever he does research on a certain historical era he’s particularly interested in.

history major!kuni who is secretly (would never admit it to anyone) very passionate about history and its people’s impact on today.

history major!kuni who flawlessly recited the entire history of tatarasuna in detail while drunk on firewater. (thank you, ajax.)

history major!kuni who buys little keychains and enamel pins of historically significant places, some of which are souvenirs he bought overseas.

history major!kuni who travels overseas not to sightsee or to eat local food, but to read up on the history of the places he visits, sometimes coming back with a whole ass completed report that no one asked him to do.

history major!kuni whose mother is the ceo of a famous fashion brand, and occasionally requests for her son’s help in modelling for her company. (kuni adrien agreste era?)

history major!kuni whose mother, raiden ei, does not want him to follow strictly in her footsteps and wishes for him to choose his own path, but he misunderstands this as her neglecting him throughout his childhood.

history major!kuni who has many private consultations with professor nahida, the peculiar child-looking professor who hides an astounding amount of wisdom behind her big doe eyes.

history major!kuni who doesn’t even need professor nahida’s help in academics, and only spends time with her because of her comforting presence (again, would never admit this to anyone).

history major!kuni who, when comfortable with someone, would talk their ear off about a random history topic unprompted. any time, any day.

history major!kuni who only shrugs it off if you compliment “oh wow, you’re so good at history!” but goes stunned in admiration when you add on to his history ramblings.

history major!kuni who drags friends and close ones to museum outings together, but is slick about it so you don’t make fun of his geekery.

“hey, some rando asked me out on sunday and i don’t want to ruin my image by rejecting her upfront, so go to the museum with me sunday morning so i can tell her i’m busy.” “sure, kuni, sure… definitely not because you wanted to see the new exhibit on fontaine’s olden technology, no?” “pfft, what? of course not.”

history major!kuni who can go into heavy detail, and will, in a history topic if you expressed curiosity in it.

history major!kuni who only lends his history notes to close friends and people he thinks are passionate about history enough and hence deserve to see his (totally not) high quality, organised, 37-hour-long-preparation notes.

history major!kuni who thinks of travelling around the world (he has the money) or being a museum curator after he graduates.

#scaramouche x reader #kunikuzushi x reader #wanderer x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #scaramouche #kunikuzushi #wanderer #genshin #genshin impact #i never thought i'd write for him but it's more of a scara centric brainrot here #can be read as romantic or platonic x reader (i wrote with platonic x reader in mind but interpret it how you want!)

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tagedeszorns · 4 months

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How I once almost started my Heresy-obsession as a gigantic Ultramarines fan

When I was thinking about something @varanguard tagged me in, I ended up in a roundabout way where the obsession with the Horus Heresy started for me.

Buckle up, dear children, story time!

Back then, I was a big fan of the Space Wolves - something that continued for a long time. I've since known to have moved on from them, as the content for them really leaves a lot to be desired in terms of quantity and quality. Poor blokes.

But at the time, I was all about Ragnar Blackmane and his absolutely crazy, silly, sometimes very juvenile adventures.

And then came my friend M., my partner in crime when it came to history geekery. With whom I hiked the raetian Limes, with whom I talked my head off all night about the War of the Federates and the background to Roman electoral law. With whom I wandered around the underground of the ancient Roman neighbourhoods in Trento and with whom I waved my arms in sheer delight as I looked at the Mythraum in the Saalburg and raved about the torsion weapons on display there.

And he acted all innocent and asked: "What if there was a legion in the Heresy where we could discuss the influence of Dionysus cults from southern Italy on politics and culture in a very abstract way? I mean, look at Syracuse …."

He had me there. Subtly slipped me the parallels, grabbed me by my fascination for niche events, especially in the art historical sense.

I mean, you can easily see the Maraviglia on the wall of the Villa of Mysteries in Pompeii. The house of a very internationally active olive oil merchant who had contacts around the Mediterranean (as can be seen from the seals on the amphorae) and who had no problem putting bacchanalian scenes in the most garish colours on his walls.

From there it was a short way to the Greek cult of the hero and in the other direction to the worship of the solitary genius in the Renaissance.

Genesis of an Emperor's Children fan. Put me in a shell and wash me ashore at Cyprus.

And here it could as well have been blue instead of purple. Because I'm actually more fascinated by the Roman late republican period than the imperial era. I actually enjoy the political entanglements of the Equites more than their decline under the emperors.

As much as I was interested in the turmoil and conflicts of loyalty from the second century onwards, the reforms of Marius are more exciting in my opinion.

Virtutes and their interpretation? My thing! The organisation of public life? Wow, that's great!

Sounds more like ultramarines. I'd say that today.

But he didn't like them. For whatever reason. So he turned me in the direction he thought would be more interesting for me and let me run off - well fed with bait.

And of course, the Emperor's Children were right up my alley! In terms of art and military history as well as philosophically.

But still: @ladymirdan and I could almost, yes almost, have even better lore boxing matches today! It was very close! If he hadn't had that irrational but very typical "Ultramarines are boring" attitude. So it became Florence instead of Rome. The rest is history.

Thanks to everyone who has stuck it out this far. Text structure is not my strong point!

#warhammer #horus heresy #emperor's children #Ultramarines #History

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charmwasjess · 25 days

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This unstable spring weather is reminding me of when I was a teenager, I had a massive, irrational phobia of tornadoes, despite growing up in an area with little to no chance of them. It was so bad that my mom took me to a psychologist because I'd do irrational things like hide in the bathtub instead of going to school if there was any chance of severe weather. It didn't help. Every time the sky got dark, I'd get that weird, frantic, achy-itchy feeling.

And then, one day, I'm sixteen, working my first job at a coffee shop and I get a panicked call from my boss. I look out the window and almost comically, like it showed up just for me, to make some point, there's this beautiful white tornado dancing right towards us. I remember thinking it looked like the skinny part of an hour glass. It's true what they say about them appearing to hold still when they're heading for you, so I got a very good look at it. The trees were bending flat to the ground and the double doors of the shop were getting sucked open. Me and the other teenaged employee crowded the kids (we were also an ice cream shop, there was a birthday going on) into the center room, and we sang "happy birthday" over and over again to drown out the sound of it hitting the building. We were okay, but it took off several adjacent roofs and smashed up cars in the parking lot.

This was a weird way to start loving tornadoes. (cut for weather geekery)

They are like dreams - for all the data, we know relatively little about why they happen. We can see their ingredients: moisture, atmospheric instability, wind sheer, but sometimes all those pieces are in place and a tornado won't form. In fact, most often, it doesn't. They're still rare. The language we use to talk about them endlessly fascinates me: they are born out of thunderstorms called super cells, which have a 'lifecycle.' One thunderstorm can birth a single tornado, or many that live and die along the greater lifespan of the thunderstorm. The way they multiply is fascinating, one tornado can be circled by wispy, smaller, satellite tornadoes, or more rarely, two full-sized tornadoes side by side, a pair of twins. A group of tornados is a "family."

They come in all shapes and sizes. Mine was a skinny rope funnel, and a relatively weak example - F1 on the scale. The 1925 Tri-State tornado, F5, the strongest on the scale, was the longest recorded tornado in history with a 219-mile track. Part of the danger of that storm was that nobody even realized it was a tornado until it was right on top of them because it was so huge: it was said to look like a red, boiling fog from horizon to horizon because it was rain-wrapped, and had sucked up a lot of red river mud. Water tornadoes and fire tornadoes are both a thing.

They behave inconsistently too. The El Reno tornado that killed the storm chaser and scientist Tim Samaras in 2013 is often personified as evil, a storm set out to kill storm chasers, because it seemed to behave with particular, intentional nastiness. In 30 seconds, it went from a small tornado to a 2.6 mile wedge. It's hard to even imagine the scale of something like that: someone observing from a safe distance miles away is suddenly inside the literal tornado within less than a minute. Most tornadoes move in a more or less straight trajectory - this one repeatedly changed directions. But this is just another example of how even when scientists know how tornadoes generally behave, we're still figuring them out.

Of course, all of this is not about overly romanticizing a phenomenon that kills a ton of people each year, a fact that is only going to get worse with climate change. And certainly research funding and money for early warning systems or national weather services being less prioritized in the politicization of climate change.

I still have tornado nightmares a lot. I had one last night, which is I guess why I'm still thinking about the shapes. It's always the same: I'm standing in a house, usually my childhood home, and there are families of tornadoes that go right past it, but never hit. I still think they're so interesting. And it's funny the way anxiety can turn into fascination under the right circumstances.

#tornadoes #weather nerding #sorry this isn't about count dooku I just wanted to gush about tornadoes for a minute #story time #charm stuff #tw tornado

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wastemanjohn · 6 months

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tagged by @deanwinchesterpregnant ty ❤

1. Are you named after someone? Yes I am named after a character in a movie because my mum was a fandom girlie I guess. I also got this name because she thought it would be really unique but then when I started school there were three girls in my class with the same name so. I don't think it's a trendy name at all anymore though.

2. When was the last time you cried? I had a little career related meltdown the other day and cried a little then... but it led to me realising I need to stop being so YOLO and actually think about the future and my ambitions a bit more so it was good in the end.

3. Do you have kids? No and I don't intend to 🥳

4. What sports do you play/have you played? Does teaching myself Irish lately dance count? Idk lol lots of dance related stuff really. I went through a zumba phase last year. It's as close as I get to sport.

5. Do you use sarcasm? No, never.

6. What's the first thing you notice about people? I don't know really?

7. What's your eye color? They're green but they sometimes look brown in pictures and apparently blue when I have glasses on? So I have shape-shifter eyes. I'm basically David Bowie.

7. Scary movies or happy endings? Neither. I like mundane misery.

8. Any talents? Writing is one of the only things I'm good at lolol. I'm pretty good at abstract makeup I guess. I also used to act and was fairly decent on the bass once. I do want to take both of those things up again someday.

9.Where were you born? A city in England that most people have never heard of. I'm so quirky and random.

10. What are your hobbies? Writing, reading, yoga, wellness, aforementioned abstract makeup, music, fashion, fandom, dance. I'm also an avid theatre goer and I like talking trips to different cities to fuel my history geekery. I'm not sure if they count as hobbies or leisure activities lol but I'm sticking it here anyway.

11. Do you have any pets? Yes I have two sweet furbabies.

12. How tall are you? 5'7. My immediate family are all around 6 foot though so I've still somehow been the subject of short jokes my entire life.

13. Favourite subject in school? English, drama, history

14. Dream job? I have my dream job. Its harder these days bc of the state of my country lol but its still the thing I wanted to do the most so here I am!

tagging with no obligation @bossymarmalade @justamisthings @theangiediary @setyourfireonme @alaynestone @luulapants @beautyandthebestiality and whoever else sees this and wants to do this

#tagged #quizzle

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rhube · 11 months

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Hey, who wants to see a fanzine?

Us oldies talk about them from time to time, but it occurs to me that many of you have probably never even see one.

I have a few saved. I even built a wooden box to store them in in CDT:

No, the camera does not lie. I got the dimensions quite wrong for storing an A4 magazine.

I think I should have at least 6. But for some reason, there were only 2 in the box. Possibly selected to take to university with me? I really hope the others are in my mum's attic or something.

But anyway, these are the two I have:

Covers and artwork throughout provided by fanartists, some of it pretty impressive. I found a penpal who was a professional artist (Darrel Bevan) through Mostly Harmless.

Mostly Harmless was the fanzine of ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha - the official fanclub for the Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy. I signed up to it using a form in the back of the fifth novel, also called Mostly Harmless.

Here's some of the typical contents:

A Presitorial from the club's president and an editorial from the zine's editor. News about stuff like AGMs. Fanfiction. Interviews. A diary of meet-ups etc.

Before the Internet, stuff like this was often the only way to find other SFF geeks. SFF was regarded as a bit of a niche interest, and if you were a teenage girl in the UK in the 90s it was virtually impossible to find anyone who shared your interests (maybe some of you were luckier than me, but this was my experience - not one male friends of a similar age relate to, but the boys who liked SF in school would NEVER have talked to me about it).

So this was how you heard about meet-ups and conventions. I cannot stress this enough: there was no Internet. And people didn't put this stuff in your local newspaper.

Of course, I was too young to go to the meet-ups, but I did get my dad to take me to the convention, Lazlar Lyricon II. And through Pseud's Corner (at the back) I answered an ad for penpals and got myself 2.

Everyone had pseudonyms, like we have usernames now. I initially chose the name Spacehippy. But even though the club kept a record about pseudonyms AND HAD BOASTED ABOUT BEING ABLE TO IDENTIFY PEOPLE FROM THEM IN THE PREVIOUS ISSUE, I was mercilessly mocked for only including that when I submitted my first piece of fanfiction. This:

Here they are, being mean about it in the intro:

As a teenager, I was so embarrassed by this that I changed my pseud to Rubarb (note spelling) which they corrected :-/// to Rhubarb. One of my penpals shorten this to Rhube and I decided I liked it. The rest is history...

There was also this, Towel Corner, which is literally just people spotting the number 42 out and about and being nerdy about it:

Or this fun quiz on the back, which was actually an advert for a convention, but you can see I filled it out anyway. With a calligraphy pen, no less!

(I had not seen Father Ted at this point? Why did I circle A??)

Here's some more fanart:

I really wish I had the others! One of them had a poetry competition, which included one of my favourite poems ever:

Leaves in the Autumn Breeze

Leaves in the autumn breeze

Blow around.

Amazing. 25 years later I still have it memorised...

This was just... it was a lifeline of silliness and geekery to a lonely teenager. I would take these to school with me and excitedly read them on the bus and at break.

They were a connection to a wider world where loving SF - or just loving anything intensely - wasn't mocked, but embraced.

Imagine if you had to push ALL your Tumblr and AO3 fannishness into one quarterly magazine that arrived through the post.

That's what fanzines were.

#fanzines #mostly harmless #the hitch hiker's guide to the galaxy #douglas adams #zz9 plural z alpha #fan history #me

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alpaca-clouds · 7 months

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Mythologic Geekery: Who were the Canaanites?

You probably have heard the word "Canaan" and "Canaanite" before. At least if you are part of an Abrahamitic religion and have had some education in it before. Because the term shows up a couple of times in the holy scripts. And if you read the bible (especially critically) you might also remember Jesus raging about the Canaanites.

So, here is the thing. The Canaanites were the original culture that had been spread in the land east of Egypt. They were a somewhat influential force in the early Bronze Age but already lost a lot of their influence as the Bronze Age progressed, and they got mostly subsumed by Egypt.

They had however their own religion and their own pantheon. Though we of course also know not so much about them, as we have painfully few sources from them that survived, as most sources are Egyptian or Hebrew and Christian.

But we know some things about them and their culture.

Now, it should be noted that the Hebrews did not stem from the Canaanites. Rather the Hebrews settled in the territory that was home to the Canaanites after being mostly normadic before and hence their cultures mixed.

How exactly this happened is a bit up for discussion, because what little sources we have on this are at times outright contradicting each other.

We do however know some stuff about the Canaanite religion. And if you read through all of that, you will find a lot of stuff that is very familiar if you have been raised within an Abrahamitic religion. Because a lot of stuff got picked up and mixed in.

And this is exactly where comparative mythology comes in. Because we have few sources that are historical, but we can kinda reconstruct some stuff from the religious and mythologic texts......

#mythologic geekery #canaan #ancient culture #ancient history #mythology #religion

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paradoxcase · 1 year

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Hey, who remembers when I used to post language geekery and made a whole conlang for the Homestuck trolls? I know that was a literal decade ago. but I’m starting to think sort of semi-seriously about picking up an old worldbuilding project with some unwritten stories attached to it. I dusted off a conlang that I actually still quite like and plan to do some more work on it. So, I may start posting about this language here, and possibly may write a story that’s connected to the conculture it goes with. Here is what I have of it so far.

The Doylist history of this conlang is that I was reading Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy a very long time ago, and got to the part where there’s a paragraph where a bunch of time travel shenanigans are described in the most confusing way possible using some novel combinations of English modal verbs. And I thought: I bet if time travellers existed in the real world, they would have a language that was specifically designed for making it easy to talk about time travel. What would that language look like? And I decided the best way to do it would be to mark tense on the nouns. When all of your nouns can be different tenses, it’s easy to talk about things that are at different points in their personal timelines relative to you in the same sentence or as part of the same action. This is also super useful for talking about other kinds of regular actions that don’t require everything involved to be colocated, and thus can span several temporal locations even without time travel. For example, “I don’t like the way you used to be” is an action that involves a present tense participant and a past tense participant. With a language that marks tense on the nouns, you could write this as “I-PRES don’t like you-PAST”, and it takes exactly as many words to say as “I don’t like you”, and the same is true for any combination of participants and tenses, some of which can get quite wordy in English.

The Watsonian history of this conlang is that it was created in-universe as a conlang by the all-female priesthood of a Goddess who had given them the power of time travel in order to get their society, the Cheanya, out of a tight spot where they would have all been killed by a neighboring culture. (Or, that’s what they say happened, anyway.) The priesthood carefully polices the use of time travel and the technology required to do it, but frequently use it themselves and can also use the technology to audio- and video-chat across times and timelines. So, they needed an artificial language that wouldn’t change over time with which to talk to priestesses at other points in time, that they could use to talk about time travel. The language, like the time travel technology, is a closely guarded secret of the priesthood. It’s not a language anybody actually speaks natively, although it would have been based on the native language of the creator back when it was invented. The country this takes place in is on a large island about 1/3 the size of Australia in the southern hemisphere, between two the two sides of a much larger continent that actually goes over the south pole and continues halfway up the other side of the world. The language is called QuCheanya, which technically means “the people’s language” or “the Cheanya’s language”, but this is of course just a bit of propaganda since the vast majority of the Cheanya people do not actually speak it.

The language has 25 consonants and 14 vowels and diphthongs, but only allows CV syllables, which works out to exactly 350 possibly syllables, a couple hundred more than Japanese. It has obstruents in four places of articulation: bilabial, alveolar, velar, and uvular, and five series’ of such obstrunts: voiceless stops, voiceless fricatives, and voiceless affricates at all four PoAs, and palatalized voiceless stops and palatalized voiceless fricatives at the non-uvular PoAs. It has bilabial, alveolar, and palatal nasals, alveolar and palatal laterals approximants, /r/, and /j/. For vowels, it has a basic set of six monopthongs, which are the standard five vowels plus a phonemic schwa. Then it has a series of four diphthongs ending in /i/, and a series of four diphthongs ending in /ə/. Altogether this is:

with the romanization written on the right hand side. Stress is always on the penult, if the word is four or more syllables long there will be a secondary stress on the preantepenult. All of the voiceless obstruents are voiced intervocalically, which is where they are all of the time that they are not the first sound in the word, due to phonotactic constraints.

The writing system is a syllabary, which is the usual way that writing systems work in this part of the conworld. Each character consists of a square frame which indicates by its shape the PoA of the onset of the syllable, to which can be attached diacritics indicating affrication and palatalization. The interior of the character is not featurial. The character can be followed by diacritics indicating a diphthong. Some characters have possible variants.

The frames are written in red ink above - this is how writing is done traditionally, for official purposes. There are different styles - you can make all of the frames red, just the ones at the beginnings of words, or just the ones at the beginnings of sentences. Naturally, it’s a big pain in the ass and it’s not done unless this piece of writing is going to be kept around for a while. However, since the language is basically proprietary property of the priesthood, it’s mostly used for official studies and research and documents done by the priestesses, and not so much used for everyday things like shopping lists anyway.

This is a largely head-last language with most of the morphology on the nouns. It would probably be classified as SOV, although it’s more correct to say it is Topic-Focus-Verb. Quantifiers and numbers precede adjectives precede nouns, adverbs (which are identical to adjectives except that they modify verbs) precede verbs, postpositions follow their objects. The one head-first part of the language is that there are a few nominal compounds that are head-first, like for example QuCheanya as mentioned above. However, these compounds are not very productive.

Nouns are marked for case, number, and tense.

Tense is indicated by a single consonant: q for past tense, c for present tense, and p for future tense. Tense strictly refers to the noun’s progress along its personal timeline, as opposed to the global world timeline. The global world timeline is generally referenced using nouns referring to particular days/dates/times or just generally “past” or “future” in the locative case, however, there are special tenses that are used if an object is in the past or future of its timeline relative to the speaker, but is not in the past/future of the global timeline relative to the speaker. Say, if you time travel into the past from a future point, you as you were before the time travel is in the past of your own personal timeline, but in the future of the global timeline. So in this case you would, instead of using q to indicate past tense, use qqh to indicated “past displaced” tense, and in the reverse case would use pf to indicate “future displaced” tense. The displaced tenses can also be used somewhat more laxly in most situations where an object or a person is considered to be in the “wrong” temporal position for what it should be due to time travel - this is naturally fairly subjective.

If the noun is the topic of the sentence, it always appears first in the sentence regardless of its role, obligatorily marks tense, and then has the topic ending -ei (singular) or -eya (plural) following the tense consonant. For every other noun in the sentence, tense marking is optional, and leaving it off indicates that it has the same tense as the topic noun. For non-topic nouns, the optional tense is a syllable consisting of the tense consonant followed by -a, which is followed by a case-and-number marking syllable, which is one of the following:

The nominative singular is unmarked. Plurals always end in -a, nominatives ending in -e -i -o or -u add -a to form a diphthong, words ending in -ä change the -ä into an -a, words ending in diphthongs of the form -Vi transform into -Vya, and words already ending in -a do not change. Nominative is for subjects, accusative for direct objects, dative for indirect objects. Alienable genitive is marked on the possessor noun (which precedes the unmarked possessed noun) and is used for things that are alienably possessed, such as belongings and more abstract things such as thoughts and ideas. Inalienable genitive is used for inalienably possessed things, such as body parts and family members. Locative is used generally to mean “in/at/on” for both physical places and temporal “places”, and also with objects of postpositions indicating location in space or time, oblique is used with the objects of all other postpositions.

Pronouns are inflected for case and number. If a tense needs to be used with a pronoun, the tense syllable (tense consonant plus -a) precedes the pronoun.

So “you” (singular) as the topic, in the present tense, would be written as “ca pfei”.

Verbs are generally invariant, although there are many verbs that are formed by prefixing a postposition onto the front of a verb to change its meaning, similar to how this happens in Latin with prepositions.

There are, however, two particles that can come after the verb in a sentence - an aspect-marking particle and a future relevance particle. There are two possible aspect particles, sei, marking habitual aspect, and cä, marking perfective. Unmarked sentences with no particle are by default in progressive aspect. The future relevant particle is rui, which is actually identical in form to the postposition meaning “from”. This is used to indicate that the action has relevance to a (relative) future time, and can be used in similar situations to English constructions like “I have finished eating”, which is different than “I finished eating” in that implies something about the present state of things, or “I will have finished eating” which is a future action that has relevance to a further future time. It can also be used with present actions deemed relevant to the near future.

Verbs that take clauses as complements (think, want, say, know, etc.) are simply put after the clause, with no modification to the previous verb. The two sentence ending particles mentioned above cannot, however, be used with a verb that is part of such a complement clause. When the complementized verb is yai, the general placeholder verb that usually means “be”, “exist”, “do”, or “happen”, depending on context, yai is simply deleted.

I did some of the Conlang Test Sentences that were posted a long time ago on the Zompist BBoard in this language. The full list of sentences is here: https://cofl.github.io/conlang/resources/mirror/conlang-syntax-test-cases.html - I will probably do more of these later as I continue to flesh out the conlang. Here are the first 22, with interlinear glosses, to give you a practice demonstration of how the language works:

tira is an adjective/adverb that means “near”, but in a temporal sense. With a future tense noun it means “soon”, with a past tense noun it means “recent/ly”, and with present tense it means “right now”. It’s related to a similar adjective/adverb tile, which means “near”, but spacially.

sisiane is a partial reduplication of siane. QuCheanya has some limited partial reduplication in closed-class word categories.

nyu- is a diminutive that is usually used to form words for baby animals. Here in sentence 17, ninyu- is a partial reduplication of it to mean a little baby animal.

Here we have tira meaning “soon”, and qhoi taking a sentence complement (except the verb was yai, so it was deleted).

#conlang #qucheanya

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kimyoonmiauthor · 2 years

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“BuT AlL of MiDdlE EarTh wAs WhITE. Tolkien would be ‘rolLiNg in HiS grAve’“

So, if you haven’t heard white proud boys purist Tolkien fans are up in arms over Rings of Power having PoCs in it, because it’s “not historically accurate to European history” (hahaha), and “Tolkien’s intentions”. So I thought I would do a run down on basic European history and Tolkien’s intentions to refute this and the other complaints, plus launch some really valid criticism about the show that’s not about race at all that these fanboys are totally missing because they really didn’t do any of the reading on Tolkien or actual European history.

Yeah, some of you won’t read my profile, but most of this is pulled from my knowledge of European history, Anthropology, and general World building geekery, which is my hidden degree. (I concentrated a ton of classes around this)

PoCs in European history:

For reference, I’m only going to loosely reference real European history since I don’t have a textbook word count to write this out with. This is more a dump and you look it up moment. If you’re not willing to look it up, don’t refute it.

This is rough, but not exact chronological order.

-Beaker People (granted this wasn’t remembered in Tolkien’s time period, but we’re operating on “real” European history.) They brought agriculture to Europe and as soon as about 5000 years ago, the majority of people in Europe were dark-skinned in Southern Europe. White skin likely started with Sami people. White skin only became more common about 4,000 years ago in Southern Europe. In Northern Europe, it’s about 6,000-5000 years ago. With first white skinned people about 8,000 years ago.

(Making it easier, pulling easy-to-read source: https://www.theguardian.com/science/2018/feb/07/first-modern-britons-dark-black-skin-cheddar-man-dna-analysis-reveals

https://www.nhm.ac.uk/discover/news/2018/february/the-beaker-people-a-new-population-for-ancient-britain.html)

Under this specifically: The Cheddar Man: https://www.nhm.ac.uk/discover/cheddar-man-mesolithic-britain-blue-eyed-boy.html

- Early Jews in Europe. Jews weren’t rebranded white until a *lot* later in history. But going over that is cumbersome. Early Jews were from Western Asia.

- Rromani who came from Northwestern India, and were nomadic. (In the show Harfoot is kinda based on Rromani and they are Rromani-coded in many ways). BTW, Roma are the largest group of Rromani, but not all Rromani are Roma. The G-word is a slur.

(Image from: https://www.livescience.com/40652-facts-about-roma-romani-gypsies.html)

- Mongols via the Mongolian Invasion, who changed the food habits of Europeans (particularly on meat-eating) and imported from Persia (now Iran) distillation of wine and spirits. (They also brought distillation to East Asia and Russia too).

- Islamic Empire in Al Andalus (Southern Spain) and later the Moors that came there. Al Andalus brought Renaissance to Europe. Gothic Architecture--that’s them. The pointed arches are something they brought. Love Poetry/courtly love, modern medicine, Scientific method, astronomy (astrology somewhat), algebra, sciences, formal academies, etc. They collected from India, so brought eh Zero from India, decimals from China, etc. (BTW, Automatons still blow my mind)

- Crusades brought in Northern Africans.

- Slavery from Western Africa brought in black people in Tudor times.

- Colonization of the Americas brought in Indigenous people, though not ethically done. Such as Pocahontas, who went to England to negotiate treaties, etc.

- Outside of this, there were stone masons brought for building castles from Western Asia and Northern Africa. This is covered by Ruth Goodman in the documentary about Guédelon Castle, who explicitly cites this to be the case.

- Math was invented by Egyptians, Congo people, Babylonians and Sumerians--none of which are in Europe.

- Arches is West Asia-ish, not Europe.

- Metal work, is likely started in Africa. (Most likely North Eastern)

- Spoons started in Africa.

- knives start in Africa.

- Strawberries (mentioned in the show, BTW) is New World, and BTW, I think Tolkien would be against it given his writings on food. He was particular about it. While the strawberry was cultivated in Roman times the varietal used today was cultivated first by the Mapuche and Huilliche Indians of Chile cultivated the female strawberry species until 1551, and the formal domestication of the strawberry in Europe, as we know it, is not until the 18th century. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strawberry

- Blueberries are also New World: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blueberry, having the cultivated origin in North America, though they naturally occurred in Europe.

- Grains came from Western Asia--all of them, which allowed the domestication of other things, like strawberries, carrots, etc. The earliest staple from food historian’s thought was marsh reeds in Europe, which take a long time to prepare. Brussel sprouts, BTW, are 100% European in origin. (In the cabbage/Broccoli family, which is also found outside of Europe)

-Marigolds (mentioned third episode with the Harfoot) are Mexico and Guatemala in origin, imported in the 16th century:

- Humans started in Eastern Africa by best guess.

- Horses is Asia, likely. Central Asia, though disputed on which culture came first: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Botai_culture https://www.statelinetack.com/blog/the-history-of-horseback-riding/1595/

- Boats were invented by Phoenicians--who were not European.

If we’re getting later in history....

- Jane Austen discusses slavery during the Regency period. And Belle is roughly from the same time period (Movie about a black woman, who was a granddaughter of an Abolitionist judge based on historical figures).

- British occupation of India and Pakistan brought in Indians. One of the servants of Queen Victoria was an Indian man. She also had a black goddaughter.

- The Suffrage movement also included women of color, though rather erased from history.

- British colonization of Jamaica also brought in more black people. (Granted after Tolkien)

So the idea that looking at this map of Europe and Africa, no black people or PoCs would be in Europe is ridiculous, because Europe had a forcefield around it that prevented people from coming in. People always travel. I mean Queen Cleopatra, anyone? Anyone? She traveled from Egypt to Rome.

Homo Erectus made it all the way to China without airplanes, boats, horses, and suddenly Homo Sapiens sapiens can’t travel to Europe, just across a lake? That’s not realistic.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peking_Man

https://www.newscientist.com/article/2150253-gene-study-shows-human-skin-tone-has-varied-for-900000-years/

https://www.quora.com/If-all-humans-belong-to-the-same-race-when-did-they-start-to-have-different-colours/answer/Walter-Smyth

But Tolkien WAS FOR WHITE PURITY:

https://www.good.is/articles/jrr-rolkien-nazi-letter

He hated the Nazis and if you read that article:

“Privately, according to “1937 The Hobbit or There and Back Again," Tolkien told Unwin he hated Nazi “race-doctrine" as “wholly pernicious and unscientific." He added he had many Jewish friends and was considering abandoning the idea of a German translation altogether.”

So no, he was not for “race purity”

I mean look at this burn:

25 July 1938 20 Northmoor Road, Oxford Dear Sirs, Thank you for your letter. I regret that I am not clear as to what you intend by arisch. I am not of Aryan extraction: that is Indo-Iranian; as far as I am aware none of my ancestors spoke Hindustani, Persian, Gypsy, or any related dialects. But if I am to understand that you are enquiring whether I am of Jewish origin, I can only reply that I regret that I appear to have no ancestors of that gifted people. My great-great-grandfather came to England in the eighteenth century from Germany: the main part of my descent is therefore purely English, and I am an English subject — which should be sufficient. I have been accustomed, nonetheless, to regard my German name with pride, and continued to do so throughout the period of the late regrettable war, in which I served in the English army. I cannot, however, forbear to comment that if impertinent and irrelevant inquiries of this sort are to become the rule in matters of literature, then the time is not far distant when a German name will no longer be a source of pride. Your enquiry is doubtless made in order to comply with the laws of your own country, but that this should be held to apply to the subjects of another state would be improper, even if it had (as it has not) any bearing whatsoever on the merits of my work or its sustainability for publication, of which you appear to have satisfied yourselves without reference to my Abstammung. I trust you will find this reply satisfactory, and remain yours faithfully, J. R. R. Tolkien

He also hated Hitler, a whole ton (and as cited in the article had a bunch of Jewish friends):

“I have in this War a burning private grudge—which would probably make me a better soldier at 49 than I was at 22: against that ruddy little ignoramus Adolf Hitler (for the odd thing about demonic inspiration and impetus is that it in no way enhances the purely intellectual stature: it chiefly affects the mere will). Ruining, perverting, misapplying, and making for ever accursed, that noble northern spirit, a supreme contribution to Europe, which I have ever loved, and tried to present in its true light.”--J.R.R. Tolkien, The Letters of J.R.R. Tolkien

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/325144-i-have-in-this-war-a-burning-private-grudge-which-would

He also called Hitler a “Mongrel”:

https://www.facebook.com/GOODHQ/posts/jrr-tolkien-hated-nazi-race-doctrine-and-no-problem-telling-his-german-publishin/10157470976163059/

BTW, some suggest Moriquendi had dark skin.

Tolkien also refuted all claims of racial purity during his lifetime about his world:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tolkien_and_race

So, no, he would hate you for acting like an incel neo-nazi.

In addition he often tried to update his worldbuilding to fit “science” seen here (BTW, this is the Victorian Literary movement called “realism”):

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Round_World_version_of_the_Silmarillion

Since he wanted a round world, PoCs are required for it. Closer to the equator you would get PoCs. Plus it would screw over the Nazis really well to have all this info on humanoid populations. And I think he’d be for that. Despite the fantasy, he still liked the idea of rooting it in science and history, if you look into his writings (particularly about the foodstuffs)

I should note that CS Lewis, who was his friend and often had writerly disputes with him, was for a flat world model, which is probably some of the influence on the flat world idea.

BTW, I kinda like in a symmetry of mythology take, the idea that Valinor would be sucked into another realm in order to make the world round, which would solve a lot of his issues with making a round world. It fits a lot with the whole Valhala, Anglo-saxon, etc mythos he based it on.

And about the Harfoot in the show:

As I said, coded Rromani.

But Black Dwarves, caves, etc and auto-white skin

People forget that Inuit exist? (If not Rromani)

(Image from Encyclopedia Britannica) Where do they live? Far more North than the Latitude this is set.

If you’re arguing that Dwarves “need to be all white” then you should be arguing they are all albino https://www.insidescience.org/news/albino-sharks-deep), and more like mole people or naked molerats. But they have really good eyesight throughout LoTR, so apparently they aren’t “adapted” to the caves.

So that means they are getting all the essential vitamins in those caves, which has a tree and several green plants in Rings of Power.

They must be eating something similar to seal blubber or maybe the bones of fish and animals.

If that’s the case, such that they haven’t lost all their pigmentation, as in the case of Albino sharks, cited, then having a black dwarf isn’t far-fetched. As noted, the majority of the human population for quite some time was black, considering homo sapiens sapiens are 200,000 years old.

So humanoid creatures with an argued similar biology as they are trying to pull here, would stand to reason being black in a cave isn’t a disadvantage at all. And notice it took a few thousand years of agriculture for white skin even to be more common in Southern Europe.

The “realism” vs. fantasy--real problems.

Because they are going on about “realistic” but only harping on PoCs, I thought I would point out the more pressing world building issues they should have picked up on if they had any knowledge of actual European history and the whys of it all. Icing on the cake?

- In the middle of an icestorm, acting like a fighter, and hasn’t tied up her hair?

Loosely the clothes are somewhere between Preraphaelite, which is Victorian Imagination of clothes and 12th century clothing:

Actual 12th century clothing.

But you’ll notice in the real ones, the hair isn’t down like in the Victorian imagination of the Medieval period. The proper way was to cover ones hair. (Mostly to keep dirt off of it.)

Joan of Arc also cut her hair first thing: https://www.history.com/news/7-surprising-facts-about-joan-of-arc

So Galadriel with her hair down fighting people like she has it, would be a death sentence waiting for her. It would get caught in the chainmail hood, frozen to things, and blow around. It would get her killed. I don’t think Tolkien would be in favor of the impractical. It should be braided at least or put into a bun and probably covered, as shown above. Edit: They fixed this in Episode 6, by finally giving Galadriel a braid, BUT I was honestly thinking something more like this: https://www.howcast.com/videos/500081-how-to-do-a-heidi-braid-braid-hairstyles

Or a viking battle braid. https://therighthairstyles.com/viking-braid-tutorial/

- The clothes aren’t designed for horse riding:

*sighs* Elves in LoTR habitually rode horses. Tolkien has large swaths about this.

And traveling in a robe like that in a distance like this:

No way that robe would stay that clean. It’s impractical. Often Kings through modern time would switch robes for riding. Riding in that clothing would be cumbersome. It doesn’t split in the right places, and it drags and it would collect dirt like no one’s business.

I don’t think that Tolkien, who went on and on about horses, would be in favor of clothes you can’t use for horse-riding when clearly horses are present. I mean even the Preraphaelite painting is more practical for horse riding than these clothes.

Yes, hand wavium with magic, but why not use an eagle or show that they magically appeared there (Which BTW, is a cheap effect) instead of the slow progress on the board? (Horses are expensive?) Still, the clothes need to be good for horseriding. Also, horses are not cars, so they’d probably have to stop along the way if it exceeds about 20 km. (’cause Tolkien is British), so the clothes would have to be changed. Note: Kinda fixed this later. A little. Starting in Episode 5, but I still think the clothing should keep in mind horses. Horses show up in episode 6, but are kinda mentioned before then.

Geography issues:

There is nothing on this part of the map which would make Middle Earth temperate in climate.

You see, the reason Europe gets to have agriculture besides the Beaker people is because there is the Gulf Stream, which throws all that warm water from the Gulf onto Europe. Without it, Europe would be, as my Geography teacher liked to say, “Siberia” And as he said, if you keep melting those icecaps, Europe will turn into Siberia’s climate, with really hot summers and really cold winters.

This isn’t part of Tolkien’s original map, so it’s not on him, but if we’re going by “realism” and “real history” and OMG, PoCs in Europe, shouldn’t the fact that Middle Earth be a barren wasteland without matching continent concern any of that crowd (yes, I know, white purists don’t really care about “real history” even when spouting it.)

BTW, some people lose their minds to find that agriculture+the Gulf Stream made them white. Downright angry. ‘cause then white people aren’t necessary in world building. But anything to piss off the white purists.

I should be clear, I’m willing to let these details go, and do hand wavium in my head, but really, if they are thinking Middle Earth is “real” history, shouldn’t they be more concerned about these three things than some scattered PoCs, most of which are not named? Five, first episode +2 second episode (only one of the two named). But no~ black people are “taking over” because of ~5 blacks in the first and +2 in the second. (And one of the two is on screen for less than a second--blink and you miss them). And I’m thinking, wait until they find out about the stone masons, Moors, Mongols, and West Asians in Europe. And Rromani.

Conclusion:

The thing is the majority of the people complaining are racists who want Europe to be a white haven of whiteness going back 10,000 years. They don’t really care that much about reality, in the end, and are basically doing the work of Hitler going on about White Purity of Europe and using Tolkien’s name in vain. But look, Tolkien was against that. He HATED Hitler. Hated him. Was willing to say so and have a hit put out against him. Was willing to give up German pub rights to hate Nazis. And Tolkien actively fought in his lifetime against Middle Earth being race-framed into being about white purity.

So I don’t get that.

#Rings of Power #black elves #black humans #JRR Tolkien #PoC Europeans #European history #black dwarves

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