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dcxdpdabbles · 5 months

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DCXDP FIC IDEA: The Dauntless Matchmaker

Danny Fenton is short on cash. He has been short on cash almost all his adult life, but usually, he can pull through untill the last minute before breaking and asking his family for help.

It's a pain in a half trying to find a job that is flexible enough to accommodate his "Health" issues.

He needs time off to keep his agreement. See back when he was sixteen, he realized that the ghosts that had been bothering him were all trying to challenge him for his power.

At first he looked like easy prey- being new and all- but the more fights he won the more his reputation rose and that made the ghosts attack less frequently.

They just became harder since the big guns wanted a crack at him. Danny proposed that the fights be in neutral grounds- the ghost zone- since fights in Amity Park were ruining his haunt.

Haunt Rights were highly protected and respected in the Infinite Releams.

His adversaries agreed under the condition that Danny responded to the battles within two hours; otherwise, they would haunt him in the human world.

Ghost fighting in the Infinite Releams to keep the ghosts busy, and nowadays, only the strongest bothered him like a bi-weekly challenge from dead beings that don't understand scheduling.

It worked out.....until he couldn't explain why he was missing so often in the human world. With the help of some friendly ghosts, he was able to fake a diagnosis of some muscle disorder and has been living with the excuse that he would go MIA because of it. He missed a lot.

Often enough to have almost every job he's gotten to fire him.

This brings him to his current problem. Yes, Danny can argue that he has a disability but to do so would mean having someone look into it and realize it's not real.

So when Charlie from the Tea MadHouse tells him not to bother returning tomorrow after a four-day-long battle, he can only sigh and turn in his tea maker apron.

He might have to call his parents to ask for help on this month's rent. That's a bitter pill to swallow.

If only there was a job that he could do that had no problem with him taking multiple days off without notice.

"Pardon me. I need a moment of your time." a voice calls out. Danny twists around, turning his neck slightly downwards to meet the green-eyed stare of a young boy.

"I have a proposition for you. My elder brother requires a fake lover to fool our family butler into thinking that he has moved on from the heartbreak of his last disastrous relationship. Not that anyone could blame Dowd for ending things with Drake. In any case, seeing as I have witnessed your unemployment, I figured you would do well for the job."

Danny blinks "I'm sorry?"

The kid pulls out a wad of cash. Danny can practically hear the ca-ching sound surrounding the boy as he raises a brow.

He gapes as the youth slaps the cash into his hand without so much as a blink.

"Do we have an accord?" The boy asks while Danny slowly turns the money in his hand.

"Whatever you say, temporary in-law," He says after flipping through the bills only to realize it's a hundred-dollars. A quick count of how many he's been handed causes his eyes to almost pop out of thier socket.

It's more then enough for this month's rent-hell he has some left over for at least four months!

"Excellent, we are expected at dinner. If Drake acts surprised to see you merely tap the table six times, then four. He shall fall into line and build off our lie."

Danny scrambles after the kid, nodding to himself. "Six, then four. Got it. Ugh, does the dinner have a dress code?"

It sounds like it would since a young boy just gave out hundreds like it was nothing. Danny would feel bad showing up in an old pair of jeans and a faded t-shirt.

Maybe he has a formal shirt somewhere.

The boy's green eyes flickered to him, then his watch on his wrist. "An impressive observation. Pennyworth will not be impressed by a poorly dressed paramour. We have time to purchase a suit. Come along."

Danny has no idea how someone so small can walk so fast. He feels his breathing is coming in quick bursts, but the boy doesn't seem winded at all. He winces when the boy enters a well-known suit place that is very pricey. "Is this coming out of my pay?"

"No. This shall be covered by the company card," The strange child says, holding up a black card with a quick flick of his wrist. At the sight of it, two store attendants appear at their side, offering assistance. Danny has never seen such power.

"W-wait we have a company card?" He shutters, overwhelmed by the attendant pushing him into a changing room and a light blue suit in his arms.

"Yes. However, you have a limit on what can be spent with it. I shall review the details later regarding your medical, dental, and vision benefits."

"I GET DENTAL?!"

"Of course. America's ridiculous health programs will mistreat no employee of mine simply due to lack of funds. " The boy scoffed, sounding offended by the very idea.

Danny doesn't care how long he needs to pretend to be this boy's boyfriend, and he'll sign a contract right now.

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Damian waited for Fenton to finish trying on all the suits the personal sellers had pushed onto him. He personally thinks the light blue was the best but it doesn't hurt to try other options.

They need Fenton to look his best to woo Drake and get him to stop acting so pathetic.

Yes, Dowd had broken up with him for reasons Damian is unaware of, nor does he care enough to find them, but Drake has had plenty of people break up with him before and remain on good terms with him.

Just look at Brown.

Drake had also always bounced right back after the breakup, usually because he would get tied up in either work at Wayne Industries or Red Robin.

Yet, for some reason, unlike all the others, Dowd leaving has not only been messy it also threw Drake into a downwards spiral.

He has refused even to get dress- walking around in a bathrobe and fluffy slippers- eating ice cream and sobbing over photos of Dowd for hours on end. He taken a leave from Wayne Industries and mostly stayed on monitor duty as Red Robin.

At other times, he plays sad songs and watches romance movies with a dead look in his eyes. Usually there were crumbs of some unknown spicy chips all over his face too.

Really it was unseemly.

It's been four months of this, and Drake does not seem to be getting it together. Damian had researched online, and all of the articles indicate that he should have felt better by the third-month mark.

He would have left the fool well alone only Pennyworth is beginning to worry. And Damian refuses to let Pennyworth worry over something fixable.

His research showed that a "rebound" was highly recommended (if done correctly), in the healing process of a breakup. Drake refused to find one, so Damian assigned himself the task of finding one for him instead.

He considered Drake's past lovers' looks, interests, and personalities. Then creating a list of what was considered a good candidate he wandered around Gotham in search of someone who would be a perfect rebound.

His efforts led him to Tea MadHouse- a tea shop with a surprisingly good coffee menu- where Daniel Fenton worked. Over three weeks, Damian had watched him, categorizing the pros and cons that Drake would find within Fenton, and concluded that he would be perfect.

The fact Fenton has lost his job now only worked in his favor. He'll convince Drake that Fenton is a decoy for Pennyworth - since Drake was getting fed up with all the hovering- and he would never notice that the real target of this fake relationship would be Drake himself all along.

Fenton will woo him, sweep him off his feet, make him forget Dowd and ride off into the sunset with Drake none the wiser. It was full-proof.

Damian will make Drake rebound on Fenton, even if he has to throw the idiot at the other teen. He is getting awful tired of the concerned glances whenever Drake slumps his way into a room.

No other reason. He certainly didn't care about Drake that much nor did does he lay awake at night wondering how Drake is doing now that he does not have someone to hold him.

Drake doesn't sleep well alone.

"How do I look?" Fenton stepped out of the booth wearing the light blue suit. It made his eyes pop and framed his body well.

Yes, muscular. The body of a boxer. Drake will lose his mind over those biceps.

"Ravishing." He tells the nineteen-year-old. Damian barely bites back a smirk as Fenton flushed, painting a pretty picture. Drake enjoys talking his lovers up, and Fenton will do well to receive plenty of compliments. "Let us be off."

Drake won't know what hit him.

#dcxdpdabbles #dc x dp crossover #dead tired #The Dauntless Matchmaker #Damian Wayne really said if you want something done right do it your self #Danny went along cause Damian has that much of a commanding presence #hes also poor and needs the job #Tim is in the trenches from Bernard leaving him

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minty364 · 6 months

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DPXDC Prompt #70

Danny and Damian are twins and they are unfortunately forced to fight each other for title of heir at the age of 5. Danny dies after losing and Talia desperately throws him into the lazurus pits. He doesn’t come back out.

5 years later they throw a one Jason Todd into the pit and he also doesn’t come back. But Danny does now 10 years old but he has white hair and glowing green eyes. Oh wait it’s back to normal black hair and blue eyes now. Talia is majorly confused and she grabs both of her sons to take them to live with their Father and gives Damian the order to protect Danny from harm.

Jason wakes up in front of two kids one wearing a red cap and the other was goth as fuck. What the hell happened and how was he here?

I was basically wondering what would happen if Jason and Danny where thrown into the pits and turned on the portal at the same time and what if they swapped places.

#dp x dc prompt #dp x dc #dc x dp #danny fenton #danny phantom #danny and damian are twins #poor danny #writing prompt #Danny and Jason swap places #I kind of figured Danny wouldn’t be spared if he was just some random kid so hence twin au #The was I’ll handle character death is #is it described at all? If it goes into great detail than yes but if it’s just casually brought up by Danny then no #I’ve had a bad depression spiral lately and I know I need to look for a new job but I’m also so fucking tired of life you know?#My mental health is really bad rn lmao

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aethersea · 2 months

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devastating to go into the tag for an obscure vampire movie I've been quietly obsessed with for years to find mostly gifsets of minor characters (played by big-name actors) and review blogs saying they didn't like it :(

@ everyone who made a post saying "I liked it :)" I am blowing you a kiss. everyone who made a lovely gifset or photoset of the cinematography I am tipping my hat. that one poster that said "bro did y'all just miss the Entire Message about class and race or???" I am shaking your hand with enthusiasm there was SUCH a message about class and race

anyway everybody should watch Night Teeth and revel in glitzy flashy modern vampires in LA with me

#finx rambles #night teeth #vampires #apparently the marketing heavily overemphasized megan fox (she has a bit role. she's in like one scene)#so that one's not on the fans #but I am sad about all those people fuming bc it didn't have a poly ending #girl this is hollywood? what did you expect?#invent it yourself? that is what fandom is for?? queer reads have always been about discarding endings and living in the liminal??#(side note I love queer readings of fairy tales. fairy tales class was so fun. god I need sleep or something my brain is on SUCH tangents.)#frustrated by that one post saying 'the vampire-slaying gang leader spends the day after a catastrophe befalls #trying to get his shift covered at work? unrealistic'#bro he's working class. he's poor. he's gotta put food on the table. do you think your job cares about your personal tragedy #this is in fact part of the Themes At Play wrt class. believe it or not.#sad also about those reviews that are like 'eh it was mid' but I've never needed critics to agree with me and I'm not about to start now #I did think the gifmakers would be on my side though #the lighting in this movie???#that whole opening sequence in the credits with the storytelling done through reflections in cars at night?#the color choices??? the lighting??!?!?!?!

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beevean · 19 days

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I keep thinking of this interpretation of N!Hector (at the bottom). How, essentially, his growth revolved around his conception of love: how he's at his core a broken, love-starved man who had to learn how to let go out of selflessness.

They make some valid points. So I want to put together why the story still wastes a very intriguing concept and its morals are still disgusting.

Let's take N!Hector purely from this angle. His sloppy writing starts to make sense. N!Hector never warms up to Carmilla, because his last memory of Carmilla is her beating him up after she revealed that her apparent respect was a lie. Dracula is on thin ice: he was the first person who was nice to him, but he lied to N!Hector about his real plans, and most importantly, got convinced that he might have died if Dracula actually succeeded. (still doesn't stop him from wanting to resurrect him)

Lenore is "nice" to him. Lenore not only praised his voice, the strength of his character, etc., but she also has shown that she wants to be with him for no ulterior reason, and that she wants to protect him from mean Carmilla.

So N!Hector is totally fine with her. It's okay that she beat him that one time, because it was his fault (granted, an abused person might think like that...). It's okay that she made a sexual game out of taking him out with a leash: that's just how vampires are, right? It's okay that she used sex and took advantage of his feelings to put a trapping ring on him: it was with good intentions. It was for his sake. It was to protect him.

So, N!Hector falls in love with Lenore because she did everything in her power to keep him in a gilded cage, including resorting to rape by deception. Abuse is love. Selfishness is love. He, too, loves like a vampire, shown by the way he surrounded himself with pets magically compelled to be loyal to him, so the two have the same love languages.

This speaks of a profoundly ill mentality, the byproduct of a lifetime of abuse. It's a delicate topic that should be treated with the utmost respect.

youtube

exhibit a: respectful writing that truly gives trauma the gravitas it deserves.

After some more bonding over how similar Lenore and N!Hector are because no one loves them and they're just victims, they're so like each other fr fr, we get to S4E6. In a way, we can see N!Hector's actions here as a mirror to what Lenore has done to him: she used treachery to turn him into a tool and so "keeping him safe", and so he used treachery to cage her and protect her from Isaac destroying the entire life she built with the others. This is mercy for him. This is an act of love. Protect Lenore and stay close to her, but everyone else can die, even if it hurts her. I see the intention, I really do.

But add to this the fact that N!Hector's whole plan was for the sake of resurrecting Dracula, therefore risking another mass slaughter, for no other reason than to feel better about his mistakes, and we're starting to see a problem.

We're near the end of the show, and N!Hector hasn't grown one bit. Not morally, and not emotionally. He still has no empathy. He still loves like a vampire. He still has no self-respect. He went through unimaginable torture, and he's still the "manchild" we were supposed to laugh at in S2 - except now he's marginally cooler, I guess.

(also, is it really "love" if N!Hector genuinely thought N!Isaac would kill him and he accepted it? He didn't plan to stick around, he didn't plan to "keep" Lenore with him. So the point starts to fall apart.)

But then N!Isaac makes a speech to him about agency and the will to live, and a few episodes later, N!Hector has his "magnificent" growth. His sign of maturity is letting Lenore die. Not keeping her close, despite her being the kindest person to him (although I suppose N!Isaac will quickly replace her lol). Letting this woman, both a victim and an abuser, commit suicide on her own terms, the terms he never had, is N!Hector finally learning how to love.

All very nice and wholesome. On paper.

Lenore is forcibly made to be sympathetic in S4, to the point that it becomes blatant lying. Suddenly she has no sexual interest in N!Hector anymore, after all she did to him (and very interesting, that Lenore was only aroused when he was her prisoner - now that he has more freedom and seems to like her as a person, she doesn't care anymore). Suddenly her smug demeanour has vanished, treating him with almost real respect. Suddenly there's more focus on how alone she is, and how she and N!Hector can relate to each other and only have each other in the world. It's disingenuous, and all so that I could pity her, and believe that these two would care for each other, and be touched that N!Hector's big love gesture is allowing Lenore to find freedom from her unnatural existence, while in reality I'm just frustrated that this rapist got to find freedom from the consequences of her actions - she doesn't even feel bad for what she did, "I'm sorry for everything you went through", so much for growing to love him. It's not even framed as him being free of her, but her being free of herself, fuck that guy I guess. Hell, even her phrasing implies that the main reason she sunned herself was that she wasn't willing to live in a cage, even with Hector, basically throwing a tantrum because she didn't have power anymore. I get reading between the lines and connecting that what triggered her suicide was the realization that as a vampire she's inherently doomed to go insane with craving power, but she really painted herself in the worst light.

I can't even say that the show forgot about her previous behavior: it specifically calls out to Lenore "solving Hector's problem", but makes it a joke that is quickly brushed off. We are meant to be endeared at Lenore using sex as a tool of deception. Yeah, silly Lenore, that was awkward I guess. More seriously, Lenore neither had a solid change of heart/realization that she behaved like a monster in the name of her "good intentions", nor is she tragic enough compared to her actions - at most I can understand where part of her behavior is coming from, like her being happy to show her strength by beating N!Hector into the ground, but I don't feel sorry for her. The story had the chance to emphasize her conflict with her vampiric nature, if I was really meant to pity her hopeless existence, but it doesn't take it. So I have no reason to care about her, or think she's a good person for N!Hector. The fact that she is the kindest anyone has ever been to him doesn't mean that she is kind, just that this poor man has been spit on far too much.

And maybe N!Hector really is too broken to understand that being raped is bad. Maybe his abuser choosing to waste time around him feels like a banquet for someone as love starved as he is. But is that how he ends? Still not getting it? Still not feeling anything about the way he has been treated all this life? Is he really completely not conflicted about the two-faced way Lenore treated him?

And what about his relationship with humanity? Is writing a book about his mistakes really the best he can do? N!Isaac realized off screen that he wants to change the world for the better: what is, effectively, N!Hector's change in this aspect? Sure, maybe he won't keep resurrected pets anymore, but after jotting down how much he has fucked up in life, what does he want to do? What was his journey, made of nothing but suffering and mockery and the lesson "you are stupid for trusting", for?

If I am to read N!Hector as a victim of deep abuse, so damaging that he has lost all sorts of empathy, morals and self-worth... what is, then, the story told through him? He doesn't get better. He doesn't even get worse, in the same way Isaac did, for example - I proposed an ending where he snaps and sets the castle on fire as a bookend with his abusive childhood, which would have been tragic, but ofc it didn't happen. The climax of his journey is that he holds no resentment towards a woman who was both kind and cruel to him, and simply chose to forgive all the bad that was done to him without any struggle. He accepted the crumbs and lapped the plate.

The message: forgive the people who hurt you, if they think they are only helping you - in fact, don't even think about it. Not because it's unhealthy to let yourself be consumed by resentment. Because if they hurt you for your own good, then they are good people deep down.

Steven Universe became the internet's laughing stock for far less.

(it's not even that Lenore was his mother, or his long-time wife, someone that could be genuinely hard to distance yourself from if they abuse you. They knew each other for maybe two months.)

I cannot empathize with N!Hector, and I can't even sympathize with him, because this is not a character arc, this is a slop job. I don't think Lenore is so nice because she deigns to speak to him, and I don't think her wanting to protect N!Hector can make up for her disgusting behavior in S3. I have no reason to be happy that N!Hector is "free", because he's in the same position he started from in S2: copped up in a castle, uninterested in getting closer with humankind, alone. And I have no reason to be sad that Lenore killed herself, because the story did a poor job of convincing me that she deserved to be happy with the man she treated like a pet before her character was disingenuously defanged.

I can assure you: Ellis did not have any intention of writing a story about how abuse warps your conception of love. He just liked kicking around a ball in the shape of a character, and then gave him a rushed "good" ending (that still feels bittersweet compared to all others) because of backlash. Trying to see a coherent arc here is like trying to squint to see an image on a magic eye poster, and the effort is not worth it. N!Hector deserved better, and abuse survivors deserve to be represented by characters written with love, not spite.

#Youtube #anti netflixvania #on request of woodchipp who wanted me to publish this draft #i really really really need to put my thoughts on text #even if i feel i'm doing a poor job #and ofc the reason i'm so obsessed with this is #(aside from the fact that i like good writing)#1) the concept is good! it's really good! i love stories that explore the effects of abuse and terrible experiences #2) canon hector is also a victim of abuse. he could be written similarly. except with respect #and i need to understand how *i'd* do it to not make the same mistakes #(also yeah lenore deserved better too. as in not being created by a sexist molester)

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lordmushroomkat · 1 year

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Anyway I have purged my queue of Ace Attorney (I posted it all, enjoy the the massive wall of nonsense from me.) So now it's just miscellaneous and then The New Brainrot.

There's already an image of one of these clowns on here so enjoy that.

But anyway... It's Vanitas Time.

I am unhinged about all of the characters but I am becoming absolutely unwell about the titular Vanitas himself.

He's an asshole and I like him so much.

He's unhinged. He's so disingenuous and so repressed but he's so bad at keeping his feelings in. I swear sometimes he's just dissociating in the middle of a conversation.

He's a bastard and a bitch. He hates both vampires and humans for their cruelty but not nearly as much as he hates himself.

He has completely given up on life and is sustaining himself purely on spite and guilt. He makes people hate him on purpose.

He is kind but not nice. He is the embodiment of that cat knife meme, you know the one. He is babygirl and pathetic little meow meow. I want to send him to therapy.*

His vibes are constructed entirely out of red flags. He's a bisexual man that you want to keep 20 feet away from all women at all times because geeeeez my guy learn to behave yourself. He's a sarcastic prick. He's incomprehensibly traumatized.

I want to run him over with a freight train. I want to wrap him up in a homemade quilt and give him a cup of hot cocoa. I want someone to hold him tenderly. I want that twink obliterated (gayly).

He looks and acts like a feral alley cat. His outfit is simultaneously iconic and absurd. I think he stole someone's gender. He wears gloves with claws on them.

He is terrified of genuine connection yet he craves intimacy so badly. He is a massive pile of trust issues.

He is doomed by the narrative, he is running out of time, he is destroying himself through every step of his objective. He knows he will likely destroy himself before he can ever succeed. He is terrified of losing his humanity. He calls his objective vengeance but I'm pretty sure it's actually absolution.

There is something very very wrong with him.💖💜💙

*(I want to send all of these characters to therapy.)

#fandom brainrot #the case study of vanitas #vanitas no carte #vnc #Vanitas [the human] (vnc)#bisexual Vanitas #Vanitas is babygirl #Vanitas is my poor little meow meow #everyone in vnc needs therapy #Vanitas is a danger twink #also I think he is a bratty sub and someone needs to tenderly dom him and then thoroughly fuck the noise out of his head #that's right I saved the spiciest thought for the tags #anyway I never mentioned it in the post because I was trying to be ambiguous but I think Noé is the gentle dom for the job so: vanoé #regardless of his being doomed by the narrative I still hold out quiet hope that he gets to live; albeit forever changed #what can I say? I think it would be more interesting if he was simply made new and had to deal with the fact that he will continue to exist #we'll see #kat rambles about the stupid vampire show

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sportsthoughts · 15 days

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feeling Mentally Strong this afternoon so going to brave watching/giffing some of last night's game

#also a little personal update as I've told loads of you about this/moaned about it in tags for a while and you've all been so supportive #v relieved to say after 3 (hellish) years of prep mr sp passed his week long assessment last week and starts his new job soon #very exciting for him career wise. and me sanity wise because even though we still need to move house this summer we don't need to relocate #and because we'll be Considerably Less Poor!!!#only downside is he has to go away for 6 weeks straight may-june to train which is far more time away than usual and I may go mad #esp if we don't make the you know whats and I have no hockey to keep me entertained #but very good news overall and thanks to my lovely friends & mutuals here who have been extremely supportive in my time of monster stress #hilariously he's had to go back to work this weekend even earlier than usual as penance for leaving so it's hockey afternoon for me :)

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solarflare-s · 2 years

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the try guys did not kick ned out because he cheated on his wife they kicked him out because he had a relationship with one of his employees. yes the cheating is bad but the bigger issue is that the person he cheated with is someone that reports to him and relies on him for a paycheck

#i keep seeing people say this on twitter #it is making me crazy #poor choices are poor choices and not necessarily the business of your job #it becomes a problem with your job when you develop a relationship with someone who depends on you for a job #ALSO they very fucking obviously knew about this before yesterday holy shit some of you guys need to take a second and think #ariel did not learn about this yesterday #they were likely waiting to see if they needed to address the cheating or if they could let him go without bringing up why he was leaving #untagged #try guys #internet drama

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quietwingsinthesky · 1 month

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if there was a torchwood/spn crossover, jack would get shot in the head so much. i know he already dies a lot, but he’s going to die so many times during this crossover. keeps getting bullets unloaded into him. they stab him with silver and steel and copper and none of it keeps him down. he’s gonna get squirted with borax and that one’s not gonna kill him but it is going to ruin his coat, which is materially worse for him.

#also gwen cooper would wrestle dean to the ground and beat him half to death #ianto is going to get himself possessed. im not saying he doesn’t take every precaution he knows how to against it. im saying he does and it #doesnt work <3 #i think sam and tosh could be friends :) (<- actually means they’re just both stuck in ‘make this conversation go as smoothly as i can by #masking so fucking hard. so that i can leave sooner’ mode.)#and i think owen would kiss dean on the mouth because it would make him so uncomfortable and owen can and will use his ability to be an #asshole without regret for the good of the team. especially if this moment is directly a result of like. Dean hitting on Tosh while she’s #clearly not into it. Owen is going to kiss that man at the risk of getting shot just like jack has 17 times in a row just so that he’ll #fuck off and leave tosh alone. and this will work because dean winchester will immediately malfunction upon being kissed by a man because #now he doesn’t know whether to direct his homophobic impulses at owen (<- unaffected by anything he could say.) or himself (<- guy who #believes being gay works like cooties.)#and in the background you can see jack sort of gently put his hand over toshiko’s and she releases a pen she was holding onto very tightly #and this is the part where you realize Oh She Was Going To Stab Dean In The Knee With That If He Didn’t Stop.#i also think Jack should get to kiss Crowley. i think they’d both be into it and it’d be funny. i think they should reference that they’ve #been off-and-on lovers for years actually. (gwen: you’ve been sleeping??? with the king of hell???? || Jack: see i don’t know why this is #surprising to you.) (ianto has been standing there with his mouth slightly open for a full minute. long enough for crowley to comment on it #and for owen to jokingly try to shut it for him. (cue short impromptu slap fight as ianto bats his hands away and then owen gets too into #defending the honor of his poor slapped away hands.) but anyway. <3 ianto you’re into guys you really need to come to terms with this at #some point sir. jack is *not* your exception this is an all day job.)

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mwagneto · 7 months

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the only thing i hate more than ppl who lie is ppl who lie in a way that forces you to go along with it like ohhhmy fucking god do whatever the fuck you want if it's only yourself you're embarrassing but why would you bring ME into this. lord

#just tell the fucking truth!!!!! it's always so fucking obvious too like omg 😭😭 shutthe fuck up #anyway guess who has to make like 5 extra trips across budapest coz their father is insane (me)#no reason!!! no reason whatsoever!!!!! literally could've just told the truth!!!!!!#him and another man both expect me to lie to a bunch of people but they're also #lying to EACH OTHER and i know they're lying and they know i know but they dont know the other's lying #AND FOR FUCKING WHAT!!! YOU COULD JUST BE HONEST. IT'S SO EASY.#i literally dont give a shit if it's just his lies he's a /redacted/ it's literally his job to lie. BUT LEAVE ME OUTTT OMGGG fuck #also they didnt explain to me that I'd have to lie and then got mad at me for not lying. LIKE GIRL . WHAT ♥#ended up calling other guy's secretary coz i literally had noone else to talk to abt it and i was abt to have like a #full nervous breakdown in a public square. poor woman #she was very nice tho. thankfully coz that would've been the last straw for real #barking #also i tried soooo hard to get clear instructions from either of them and neither of them told me Anything #LIKE BRO IM GONNA BLOW UP. TELL ME EXACTLY WHAT I NEED TO DO. STEP BY STEP

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gay-jesus-probably · 3 months

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it would be really funny in hywar for ruto and darunia to recognize the "hero of termina" but probably be confused because why is he tiny. wait there's more of them. okay i guess this isn't the guy we know (it is)

Oh yeah, I'm thinking Ruto and Darunia are 100% onto him, BUT they're the adult timeline versions, so they haven't seen the baby Hero of Time in years, so they're not 100% sure if that's actually him, or if the kid just happens to look like him. Besides, the kid says he's just the Hero of Termina, and the Hero of Time definitely didn't scowl that much when he was younger so... they're suspicious, but not confident enough to try and address it. And since all the sages except Sheik ascended into non-existence or something after sealing Ganon, Ruto and Darunia must have been pulled from somewhere in the middle of OOT, so they're used to the teenage Link, and unlike Sheik they have no reason to think he's going to return to being a kid. So as far as they know, it makes perfect sense for the Hero of Termina to just have a strong resemblance to how the Hero of Time looked when he was younger... but man are they ever identical.

Mask avoids them like the plague, because he knows they could bust him... and he also knows they're basically going to die shortly after they go home. He really doesn't have the emotional bandwidth to try and deal with that, so he just keeps his distance. But Ruto and Darunia are having many quiet debates in the background about "is that our Link or not". They are constantly pressing X to Doubt.

(Marin is also a solid member of the Press X To Doubt club, because she's like 90% certain that Ravio guy's voice is identical to her Link's, and even though she can't be sure with all the robes she thinks they might also have the same build, and the few glimpses she gets of the bottom of his face looks like Link... but also he doesn't seem to know her at all, and is just generally acting kind of off, so she's just... not sure what's going on there, but it bothers her. And she doesn't even have anyone to compare notes with.)

Also, please consider for a moment that Ganondorf knows basically nothing about the whole Majora's Mask debacle, so he only knows Mask as being the Hero of Time, and could out him literally by accident. I have this mental image of Ganon attempting to do a big dramatic showdown, only for the mood to thoroughly ruined by Mask frantically cutting him off mid-sentence, because if he gives any details right now, Mask is fucked. The exchange is something like "We meet again, it's been awhile, Hero of T-" "TERMINA, YES, that's me, how about we stop talking right now and try to kill each other instead". Ganon then delays the boss battle to try and work out what the fuck is going on, and also because Mask's obvious panic is hilarious to him.

(Meanwhile Captain Link knows that something is up, but he is literally always having a minimum of three simultaneous mental breakdowns at any given moment, so he's pretty happy just not acknowledging his suspicions that Mask's real hero title is very well known, he really doesn't need more stress in his life. He's trying so hard not to hear the extremely incriminating argument Mask and Ganon are having, and trying even harder not to connect the dots and realize what Mask's real title is. He's not succeeding. After that particular battle, he goes back to his tent and spends a solid ten minutes screaming into his pillow before he can successfully repress the knowledge that he's been fighting alongside the literal Hero of Time and affectionately referring to him as a demonic little gremlin. As long as Mask doesn't acknowledge it, he doesn't have to either, so it's fine. Everything is totally fine.)

#hyrule warriors #poor captain link is just having the worst time ever #also my take on him is he grew up rough and lied about his age to get out by joining the army #so he is ALSO hiding his real identity. except for him it's just the fact that the supposedly 20 year old hero is actually like 17 #considerably less dramatic than what everyone else has going on. but he's an honorary member of the 'nobody says shit' gang #honorary bcause for the sake of his own sanity he is not acknowledging that anyone is hiding their identities in the first place #but like. he knows. and he wants the others to keep their secrets cause if they dont he's the one that has to deal with it #he's already so stressed he doesn't need more problems in his life so they can keep their fucking secrets thank you very much #this poor bastard joined the army for a steady job and somehow became Helen of Troy he's got enough on his plate already

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