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iguana-eyanna · 2 years

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Falling for you

Pairing: Ikaris x POC! Eternal! Reader

Summary: you realize that you have to run away from the man who flew too close to the sun

Warnings: spoilers

a/n: inspired by Niall Horan's version of Fool's Gold

"What makes you think I could use my powers willingly? You know I can't see two feet in front of me." You joked to Ikaris as you were both lying in bed.

He laughs as he pulls you closer to himself. Ikaris thought he could never feel so at ease.

After everyone split into different paths, Ikaris had a low profile. Only Ajak knew where he has been all this time until he saw you again. You coincidentally bumped into Ikaris on an island that wasn't well known. He was convinced that your powers showed him where he was, as you had the power to see glimpses of the future, but you said it was by pure chance.

You traveled all over the world, trying to heal an absent longing in your heart as most of the other Eternals found their calling. Both of you were just lost and it was like you were meant to find each other. Ikaris realized you were the shining distraction that makes him fly.

"What are you thinking about?" You teased him as his mind was elsewhere.

"You're the rays on the waves that calm my mind." he whispers under his breath. You smile contently at him as you snuggled closer into his warm chest.

"Don't you need to visit Ajak soon?" You quipped.

You feel a type of tension as Ikaris hugged you tighter in his arms.

"There's still time, but right now, I want to get lost in your beauty."

You playfully roll your eyes as you move your fingers across his salt and pepper-colored locks.

"Just be careful when you fly out. I don't need to see news of a superman soaring through the air.

He laughs, then kisses your plump lips. "'I'm the first to admit that I'm reckless, but for you, I promise I won't do anything rash."

He made that promise two weeks ago, but he broke it when he visited Ajak...

when she was alive.

"Love?" Ikaris whispers as he enters the house you two shared.

His eyes were bloodshot, coming from South Dakota as he did the unspeakable.

Silence filled the house so he searches the house. He had hoped that you didn't receive any visions, but he'd be a fool to assume so.

He stops in his tracks as he sees an opened letter that was placed neatly on the bed he shares with you.

He sits down on the king-sized bed, slowly opening the white paper.

Dear Ikaris,

I don't know if you remember, but I recalled our moment together in Greece. I foretold that there were sightings of the deviants in the country and we traveled with Thena. It was one of the biggest beasts we ever saw, and one almost struck me with its venom.

I wasn't quick enough to get away, so you flew in and took the strike. Thena took the deviant out and all I could do was try to wake you up. Luckily, Makkari came and delivered you to Ajak.

You didn't wake up for two days after you were healed. I stayed at your side, blaming myself for what happened. You would shiver in your sleep, breaking into sweats. My heart broke as all I could do was wipe away your brow as you wailed in pain.

The next morning, I stepped out to collect myself. Before I walked into your chambers, I saw you sitting up, smiling and in good health. I was about to rejoice till I saw Sersei at your bedside.

You thanked her for staying at your side as you were recovering. I was surprised that she took the credit, but she must have pitied that you were possibly hallucinating as no one knew I was taking care of you.

I cried in my silence and left. And yes, I let you use me from the day that we first met, but I don't regret falling for you.

And when I attended your wedding, everything inside of me was screaming to stop your ceremony. But that would have been selfish. I know in my heart you were just a moving part.

So I moved on, I jumped from country to country, never wanting to settle or allow myself to fall in love. And by cruel nature, we were reunited. But something inside of you changed, like you were the legends of Atlas, holding the weight of the sky.

I could tell you were alone for a very long time. You haven't kept in touch with the others, and you acted like I was a replacement for Sersei. I was your fool's gold.

Ikaris had to force himself to stop reading as he realized he stopped breathing. He looks down again and dares to continue

Last night, I felt you slip out of my arms when I was asleep. As you left, I had the most horrid nightmare. You were with Ajak in a forest, she was hugging you as if she was saying goodbye. I didn't understand but you....

He sees how the writing stops and a dry teardrop was next to the sentence.

When I woke up, you weren't there. That's when I knew it was going to happen.

You were our hero, Ikaris. You were my hero. You always had the sense to save everyone as you turned it on for everyone you've met, and now... I don't know what to think of you. As you finish this letter, I will be gone. I do not know what is to happen next, or what you would do to me, and that terrifies my very core.

"I'd never hurt you." he whispers under his breath as he begins to cry.

I cannot interfere with the future. I trust that the others will know on their own. Not partaking in this is the best way for both of us to choose our paths. Maybe you'll do the right thing in the end, or you'll bring the world to its knees. Maybe you'll be with Sersei again. Don't deny that you haven't stopped caring for her. I know your love's not real... That's not the way it feels, not the way you feel.

So goodbye Ikaris. I hope that in time, you'll be the hero I thought you'd be.

He crumbles the paper in his hand, trying to choke down a cry.

His time to mourn cut short as he felt an earthquake beneath him. He goes to the TV and sees news of a tremor that hit most of the continent.

Ikaris sees the list of countries and his mouth runs dry when he sees London was hit.

The Eternal wipes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

It was time for him to be a hero.

But when has a hero become so succumbed to his demons?

#ikaris #ikaris eternals #ikaris x reader #ikaris fanfiction #richard madden #eternals #marvel eternals #eternals movie #the eternals #eternals marvel

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sourwolf-sterek32 · 3 years

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Welcome to the End

Summary: Y/N Winchester was a hunter like her brothers, following in their fathers footsteps. Saving people, hunting things, the family business.

During a case in Georgia, you meet the Dixon brothers and after saving Daryl’s life against a Chupacabra, the two of you become close. But, when the zombie apocalypse starts, life as you know it changes forever.

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Winchester!Reader

Word Count: 3.8k

Warnings: Language, blood, injuries, major character death (temporary death)

Chapter 5-

You laid on the unfamiliar mattress staring up at the ceiling, listening quietly to see if Dean and Cas' argument was finish before getting up.

Slipping your boots back on, you walked out your room and came face to face with Cas, who had just stepped out of Dean's room after their heated argument.

"You heard all of that, didn't you?" Cas asked, but by the look on his face he already knew the answer. "Still think he feels the same way about me?"

"Yes, but... just... just give him some time." You suggested and Cas sighed, but nodded.

Suddenly, Sam's bedroom door opened across the hall as he stepped out, but froze when he saw you and Cas standing there.

"Everything alright?" Sam asked, rubbing his tired eyes.

"Yeah, was just telling Cas that we should go back over the map, figure out where to go next." You lied and to your relief Sam bought it.

"Good thinking. We should probably hit the road today. The more time we waste, the less chance we have of finding anyone." He responded before he turned away and walked downstairs to go over the map again.

"Thank you." Cas sighed, bringing your attention back to him.

"You helped me keep Daryl a secret from Sam and Dean for months, it's the least I could do. C'mon, let's help my brothers get a plan in motion." You said and Cas nodded in agreement.

You spent the following few hours figuring out where to go next and in the end you had somewhat of a plan formulated. You were going to go to Daryl's first, his small town was the closest to your current location. Then, you'd head north to Minnesota to find Donna, then to South Dakota for Jody and the girls, but that was as far as you'd planned.

There were holes in the plan though. So many damn holes and 'what ifs' to even count, but it was the only plan you had, so you were going to do it.

You just hoped that none of your friends had ventured too far and were still alive and surviving near their old homes, otherwise... well the chances of finding your friends, the chances of finding your boyfriend would be nearly impossible.

Then...

You sat in the back of the Impala while your brothers argued about what to do about the Mark of Cain and you were sick of hearing them fight.

You wanted to put your headphones in and block them out with music, but you had left them in the bunker. Rookie mistake.

So, instead you shot off a quick text to Daryl asking what he was up to. It had been a while since you and Daryl had seen each other. With the whole Mark of Cain thing, you hadn't been able to visit and you refused to let him come to the bunker, not wanting to put him in danger if something happened.

-Hey, not much. Merle's driving me fucking crazy though.

You smiled softly at his quick reply before you started typing your own.

-What's he done now?

-Gave himself a black eye with can opener. He's wasted.

You rolled your eyes and had to stop yourself from laughing out loud after reading that. His brother was always doing stupid shit, especially while drunk.

-Wish I could have been there to see it.

You glanced up from your phone to find Dean eyeing you through the revision mirror, but he didn't say anything to you before he focused back on the road. At least him and Sam weren't at each other's throats anymore.

-Why don't you just teleport and come here?

You missed Daryl and wanted nothing more than to go see him, but you couldn't leave your brothers. Not with everything going on at the moment, not with Dean on edge with the mark.

You knew Dean was trying to fight it, but he was struggling. He wouldn't be able to fight it forever, you knew that, Sam knew that, Cas too. Which was why you had to stick together and figure out how to get the mark off him.

-I can't. On a case with my brothers.

You had told Daryl about the Mark of Cain. Hell, he had held you while you cried about your worries for Dean. But, you hadn't told him much else about it.

-This got to do that mark? Dean, okay?

-Yeah, but Dean's okay. We might have a lead on something to fix it.

-That's good. Be careful, Angel.

You couldn't stop yourself from smiling at the nickname. You weren't even sure when he had started calling you that, but it clearly stuck and you loved it.

"Who are you texting? You keep smiling at your phone." Dean suddenly said, drawing your attention away from your phone to find your brother looking at you through the revision mirror and you rolled your eyes.

"Nobody bro, mind your own business." You responded causing Sam to chuckle softly as Dean glared at him.

"Relax. I just haven't seen you smile lately... well not since the mark. But, you don't need to worry about that, I'm fine." He insisted and you simply nodded, but you knew he was lying.

-Good luck with drunk Merle. I gotta go.

-Thanks, I'm gonna need it.

You smiled softly reading it before you turned your phone off and shoved it in your pocket.

"So, what's this lead that Charlie found?" You asked, leaning your forearms on the back of your brothers seats before Sam turned around and started explaining.

"Alright, so get this."

Now...

You had been on the road for two days now, driving during the day and setting up makeshifts camps at night. Most of which were just the four of you squished inside the safety of the Impala, but it was better than nothing.

Dean was starting to get back to his normal self, he wasn't taking his anger out on anyone or more specifically Cas. He was more talkative and positive now, which just made everything a whole lot easier.

You weren't sure if it was the conversation he had with Cas that you overhead a few days back at Rowena's that changed his mindset or not. Maybe it was just the fact that you now had a plan and could actually do something, that had gotten him into a better mood. Either way, you were relieved and it was clear that Sam and Cas were as well.

It was midday when Dean had pulled the car over in the middle of some tiny outback town. The town was only small, a few shops, a bar and the grocery store that Dean had pulled up in front.

You had tried to stay clear of towns, but you were running low on supplies. Sam had found this small out of the way country town on the map and figured that would be your best place to scavenge.

After a quick perimeter check and with the help of your super hearing, you were satisfied that there was nobody dead or alive around the grocery store, so you went in.

"Jackpot!" Dean shouted, the second the four of you entered the store causing Sam to hush him, but Dean just rolled his eyes. "Relax, Y/N said nobody's here. Look at this place, something good was bound to happen."

Dean was right. This place had barely been touched. It was almost as if the apocalypse hadn't touched the store, the shelves were all practically full and for once there wasn't a single dead body inside either. Dean was right, you had finally hit the jackpot.

"Let's split up, it'll be quicker." Sam suggested and you all nodded in agreement.

You ended up following Cas down the back of the store, shoving food and supplies into your backpack along the way.

You were only in the store for less than 20 minutes before it all turned to shit.

You could hear something outside and you had a bad feeling you knew what it was.

"Cas." You whispered, getting the angels attention from where he was further down the aisle.

"What's wrong?" He instantly asked, turning back towards you noticing the alarm in your tone.

"Zombies. They're outside, I can hear them." You answered, keeping your voice down as you reached Cas' side. "We need to get my brothers and go."

You could hear the growls of the zombies getting closer in the background and you knew it was only a matter of minutes before they'd reach the grocery store.

You grabbed the backpack of supplies and threw it over your shoulder. You glanced over at the dirty window trying to see if you could see any zombies, but the window was covered in too much dirt and grime to see through.

You followed Cas out the aisle you were scavenging and rushed back towards the front of the store where you could hear your brothers bickering with each other in the canned food aisle.

"Hey, we need to go." You shouted in a soft whisper.

"Why? This place hasn't even been touched." Dean responded, reaching for another can on the shelf as he glanced over in your direction, but immediately stopped what he was doing when he saw the look on yours and Cas' face.

"How long do we have?" Sam asked when suddenly loud banging erupted from the side of the store.

"I'm guessing none." Dean grumbled, shoving the last can into the duffle bag before he zipped it up and threw it over his shoulder. "Let's go."

Without saying anything the four of you made your way to the back door just as the sound of glass shattering filled the air and you knew the zombies had broken through the front windows.

You adjusted the strap of your backpack over your shoulders as Cas went to open the back door, but it wouldn't budge.

"It's locked." Cas stated as he tried to turn the door knob, but it was no use. Shit.

The growls of the zombies got louder causing you to quickly spin around and your eyes widened when you realised how many of them had gotten through the broken window and were heading towards you.

"Guys." You warned, pulling your angel blade out as you stepped forward, putting yourself between your family and the zombies.

"Cas, move." Dean ordered and the next thing you knew, he kicked the door open.

You spun around and followed the guys outside, but nearly ran straight into the back of Sam.

"What-" You began to question, but your voice died in your throat when you saw the mass amount of zombies outside.

"Back inside!" Dean shouted above the loud growling of the herd.

You quickly turned about to rush back inside, but you came face to face with more zombies.

"Any other ideas?" Sam frantically asked as you raised your angel blade and took out the zombie in the doorway before slamming the door shut, locking the ones inside the store up before you turned your attention back to the rest.

They were everywhere, doubling in size by the second and before you could even blink you were surrounded.

Behind you was the brick wall of the store that was filled with zombies and in front of you was a herd of them for as far as you could see.

You were fucked and by the panicked looks on your brothers and Cas' face, they knew it as well.

"Seriously, any ideas at all?" Sam repeated desperately, pulling out his demon knife as you all took a step back until your backs were basically against the wall.

You heard Dean swear under his breath as looked down at the gun in his hand uselessly knowing that a single gun wasn't going to do anything.

The assault rifles in the Impala would do some good right now, but the car was on the other side of the store. There was no way you'd make it even five metres let alone all the way back to the car.

"I got a bad idea." You announced, holding your backpack out to Sam who frowned, but took it as you tucked your angel blade away and stepped in front of all of them.

"Y/N, what are you-" Cas started to ask, but you didn't give him chance to finish.

You quickly raised your hands, using your powers as your eyes started glowing bright purple. In an instant the pain in your head started, but you ignored it as matching purple swirls came from your hands and you sent a shockwave of power at the herd.

You weren't entirely sure what happened after that.

One moment the zombies were staggering towards the group of you and the next thing you knew, you had killed over half of them. The remains of their corpses splattered on the ground, completely destroyed.

You didn't get a chance to really process the fact that the other half of the herd were already rushing towards you before the world started to spin.

Searing pain suddenly shot through your head as blood dripped from your nose and the next thing you knew the ground was rushing towards you.

"Y/N!" You thought someone shouted, but all you could register was your head slamming against the corner of the brick wall as you collapsed to the ground.

The splintering pain in your head suddenly quadrupled as something wet began to slide down your forehead. You were pretty sure you had split the corner of your head open, but you were to focused on not passing out to care.

Black dots clouded your vision as you struggled to stay conscious, but you knew you had to stay awake.

You forced your eyes open to find Cas and Dean crouched down in front of you with panicked expressions. Their lips were moving and you knew they were trying to talk to you, but you couldn't hear anything above the ringing in your ears.

Cas quickly placed his hand over your forehead and it took your foggy brain a few moments to realise that he was trying to heal the gash on your head. But, when he pulled his hand away it was clear that it didn't work with all the blood smeared over his palm.

Suddenly, Sam grabbed your arm and pulled you to your feet, but your legs instantly buckled from underneath you and if it wasn't for him still holding you, you would have hit the ground again.

The world around you was still spinning even more when Dean appeared in front of you again, well three of him appeared in front of you.

Suddenly, Sam grabbed your arm and threw it over his shoulder, stopping you from collapsing.

Again, he was saying something, but you couldn't make out any of the words.

A moment later, Dean grabbed your other arm, throwing it over his shoulder before your brothers started to help you run in the opposite direction from the zombies, Cas taking the lead and taking down the few zombies in your way.

The next few minutes went by in a blur and before you knew it, your brothers were helping you inside some kind of building.

Slowly your hearing started to come back, the ringing in your ears lessening, but the pain radiating through your skull didn't. If anything it was getting worse and you weren't entirely if sure you were going to pass out or throw up.

Dean let go of your arm and disappeared for a moment, letting Sam lead you further into the building. He slowly helped you to the ground before he rushed back over to the front door to help close it as the zombies reached the building, their loud growling and banging coming from outside.

Your eyes fluttered shut and for a moment you considered just leaving them shut and drifting off into unconsciousness. No more pain, no more worry, no more anything. But, you couldn't do that. Your brothers needed you. Cas needed you.

Suddenly, a paid of hands cupped your face, snapping your eyes open to find Sam in front of you.

"Thank God." He sighed, dropping to the ground beside you as he pulled out a rag from his pocket and pressed it against your forehead causing you to wince in pain.

"Sorry. Sorry. Just don't pass out, please." Sam begged, holding the rag against the bleeding cut on your forehead.

"O-okay." You said weakly, your voice barely above a whisper as you tried to get the world to stop spinning around you.

"We wait them out. Something might come by and distract them." Cas' voice suddenly said across the room.

You looked away from Sam to find Cas standing by the door, looking through the peep hole and you only just realised that you were in some kind of house. But, you could hear the herd outside, they were surrounding the building.

"And if we can't?" Dean asked, drawing your attention away from Cas to find your brother leaning against the wall across the room.

"Then we fight." Cas answered, stepping away from the door when the zombies continued to bash against it, trying to get in.

"We'll lose." Dean mumbled and you hated the sudden defeat and sadness in his tone. Dean had given up and if he had given up, you knew you were screwed. "I just lead us into another trap."

"Dean." Cas said, his tone softening as Dean pushed himself off the wall and walked over to the angel.

"Everybody's going to die, Cas. Everybody. I can't stop it. The herd will break through that door..."

"I know." Cas sighed and you tried to sit yourself up, to say something to them, but you were too weak. You couldn't.

"They're gonna kill us, and then Sam, and then Y/N... I'm sorry." Dean whispered, shaking his head.

For a moment nobody said anything as Sam gently removed the rag from your forehead no doubt to inspect the wound, but you were too focused on the look on Castiel’s face. He was sad... but happy at the same time and he almost seemed relieved as he took a step towards Dean.

"Wait, there is another way. We don't know if a bite can turn an angel. I can get through the herd and draw them all to me, give you guys a chance to escape." Cas suddenly said and your eyes widened.

No. He couldn't do that. Cas wasn't going to sacrifice himself for you guys. That was no going to happen.

"Cas, no." Sam said, speaking up for the first time causing the angel to look over at the two of you with sad eyes.

You forced yourself to sit up, leaning against your elbow as Sam quickly grabbed your shoulders to steady you.

"Easy." He whispered, not liking how much your were swaying despite half lying down and for a second you thought you were going to actually pass out, but you pushed through it.

"Cas... please- please don't." You mumbled, hating how weak your voice sounded.

You looked at the angel desperately, tears rising in your eyes making everything that was spinning around you even harder to see, but Cas just shook his head.

"No." Dean suddenly said.

"Dean, it's the only way. We don't know if a bite will turn me. I'm an angel. It's worth a shot." Cas insisted, turning his attention back to him.

"It's not worth your life!" Dean exclaimed.

"Dean." Cas said taking a step closer to him as you struggled to keep your eyes focused on them, the pain in your head getting worse by the second. "The one thing I want in this life is something I know I can't have. But, I can do this. I can save you. All of you."

"What are you talking about, man?" Dean asked, but you knew what Cas was referring to.

You knew what he wanted and you also knew that if he just told Dean how he felt, he would be able to have it. Your brother may be an oblivious idiot, but he loved Castiel, that you knew for a fact.

"I know how you see yourself, Dean. You see yourself in the same way our enemies see you. You're destructive. You're angry and you're broken. You're "daddy's blunt instrument" and you think that hate and anger.. that's what drives you, that's who you are. It's not, and everyone who knows you sees it." Cas began to say, motioning over to you and Sam, but Dean kept his eyes on Cas.

"Everything you've ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love. You raised your little brother and sister for love. You fought for this whole world for love. That is who you are." Cas continued to say, but stopped for a moment when the zombies outside started to get louder and the banging turned more rapid.

"You're the most caring man on earth. You're the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know." Cas added and even from a distance you could see the tears rising in Castiel's eyes.

"You know, ever since we met, ever since I pulled you out of hell, knowing you has changed me. Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you, I cared about Sam. I cared about Y/N. I cared about Jack... but I cared about the whole world because of you. You changed me, Dean." Cas admitted, his voice breaking as a silent tear trickled down his cheek.

"Why does this sound like a goodbye?" Dean asked, his voice rough fighting back his own emotions.

"Because it is." Cas responded with a sad yet happy smile, his eyes filled with tears. "I love you." Cas confessed and that was all it took for the tears in your eyes to fall.

You could see Dean shake his head slightly, his entire body tense as he stared at Cas and you knew your brother was in shock.

Hell, you were in shock and you were boarder-line conscious and you knew about the angels feelings too. You couldn't even imagine the thoughts that were running through Deans mind right now. Cas had just confessed his love to him and he was about to sacrifice himself...

"Don't do this, Cas." Dean begged.

Suddenly, one of the hinges on the front door broke off as the zombies continued to push against it and you knew it was only a matter of seconds before they busted through.

Dean quickly looked over his shoulder towards you and Sam. Tears threatening to spill from his eyes before he turned back to Cas.

"Cas, I-"

Dean didn't get to finish before Cas grabbed his shoulder with the hand that was still covered with your blood.

"Goodbye, Dean." He said as he pushed your brother across the room and out the way.

A split second later the front door busted open and Cas pushed the zombies back before he got through the door.

There was nothing you could do, but watch through teary eyes as the zombies bit and clawed at him through the trench coat. You could hear Cas' pained groans after each hit. But, he kept going.

He drew the zombies attention to him as he pushed through the herd and disappeared amongst them outside.

Suddenly, everything started to spin, white dots taking over your vision and the last thing you saw was Dean on the ground beside you. Tears welling up in his eyes with Cas' bloodied handprint on his shoulder before everything faded to black.

MASTERLIST

Next Chapter

-Gifs used are not mine. Credit to rightful owners.

Tag Lists- I will reblog with my tag lists, so if you wanted to be added to just let me know.

A/N- Please don’t hate me. I promise Dean and Cas will get a happy ending, just bare with me through this pain and trust me. This isn’t the end for them even though right now they all think it is.

Anyway,, next chapter the Winchesters finally reach Daryl’s home town, so stay tuned xx

#Daryl Dixon #Daryl Dixon x Reader #daryl dixon fanfic #daryl dixon fanfiction #twd #The Walking Dead #the walking dead fanfic #the walking dead fanfiction #Norman Reedus #dean winchester #castiel #Sam Winchester #supernatural #spn #Destiel

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heloflor · 3 years

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Goodbyes

AO3 link

They exist because of him. They did what they needed to do to keep him safe. Nothing but him mattered to them.

So when he discovered them, the least he could do was give them a proper goodbye.

WARNING : this is about the island of Dakotas, meaning that some pretty dark implications will be brought up regarding what Dakota does to save Cavendish.

Note : Just some random thing that’s been on my mind for a while now when thinking about the island of Dakotas during the crossover. As per usual, Cavendish is married to Dakota. Also, for those who like to visualize the characters with some details : this fic follows an idea I mentioned here about the Dakotas on the island disposing of their engagement/wedding ring. btw, the fic I mention at the end of this post isn’t this one.

And another thing : a revelation given by Dakota in the second half of this fic is inspired by the ending of the fanfic “Flesh” by rotg5311 on AO3 (it’s about cannibal Dakota so be warned if you look it up).

Anyways. Enjoy !

The sun was slowly setting as the group of Dakotas was waiting for their boat. Most members were here, though a handful didn’t make it through the fight. Those Dakotas were mainly the older ones who lived through that event once and who lived longer with Balthazar, willing to do anything for him, even more than the younger versions. There were also the ones engaged to the man but never married, who used the frustration of their situation to fight like there was no tomorrow. Then, there were the ones most impacted by what they saw or what happened before they were replaced.

Overall, around a hundred of them lost their lives that day. But given how many they were and how little their existence mattered, these losses were insignificant.

That was the mentality the rest of the group had adopted as, for the second time in their lives, they were about to leave the world forever, becoming nothing than a mysterious dot on a map.

But despite the implications of their situation, the group was happily chatting. They talked about today, about how alive they felt to fight again to save the world, about how nice it had been to see Danville again, to see Balthazar again.

Most Dakotas still had their heads in the clouds thinking about the encounter. Never had they thought they would see the love of their lives again. So when he showed up on their island…Had it not been for the dire situation the world had been in, the group would have convinced the man to stay with them for a while. They had so much to talk about, so much time gone by without each other !

Well…not exactly.

For dear Balthazar, no day went by without his husband. They knew this reality, they accepted it, no matter how much it hurt them to think about it.

It didn’t matter now anyways. They weren’t meant to exist. They had no intention of staying in town. They needed to go back to the island where they belonged.

It was with a heavy heart that the group started to embark on their boat.

“WAIT !”

All Dakotas turned their attention to the dock when they heard the all-too-familiar voice. The word “Cavendish” started to spread among the group as they noticed the tall man running towards them. They waited, until Balthazar stopped a few feet away from them, breathing heavily from all the running.

“Don’t go yet.”, he managed to say despite his panting.

The Dakotas looked at each other, unsure on what to say or do. Then, Leader Dakota approached his former partner.

The leader was the first one. The only one who never saw Balthazar die. The only one who didn’t understand the charm the man had on his future selves, the only one who couldn’t understand. That was what led him to become the chief of the village. He was the only one who wasn’t biased by his feelings.

“Balth.”, the man greeted. “Something’s wrong ? You need our help again ?”

“No. I just-“, he took a deep breath, getting his composure. “I wanted to talk to you. All of you.”, he looked at the crowd, glancing at every Dakota he could as if wanting to look at all of them at the same time.

“I wanted to thank you all again for what you did. Not just today, but for me.”, a small smile formed on his lips. “I always knew my clumsiness could be dangerous for me. But this…I never would have thought you would be willing to do something so drastic. All for me…”

A murmur of “of course !” and “whaddya gonna do ?” spread among the group. The leader just shrugged.

“We’re more than glad to be here for you. We’re partners after all. It’s what we do.”, he commented.

Balthazar nodded, eyes glancing between the crowd and the leader.

“I don’t…I don’t know what you all went through or what you saw. And I know it’s not much after being away for so long but…I wanted to tell you goodbye. You deserve it. You deserve so much more ! And I’m…I’m sorry I can’t give it to you.”

“Aww. Come here !”, Leader Dakota approached the taller man and took him into a hug. Balthazar was quick to return the gesture, his smile never faltering.

“Goodbye, old friend.”, he murmured.

“It’s been nice seeing you again buddy. Take care.”, Leader Dakota replied.

After the shorter man pulled away, Balthazar approached the others and opened his arms. It only took an instant before the group understood and started to hurry towards him. Soon enough, Balthazar had to catch himself as one of the Dakotas jumped into his embrace.

Balthazar found himself giggle at the gesture and, as he heard a sob from the man in his arms, he started to slowly rub his back in comfort.

“Goodbye honey.”, the Dakota wept. “I’ll be missing you.”

“Goodbye.”, it was the only thing Balthazar could say. Those men all had a history with him, whether as an old pal, a date or especially a husband. He knew how terrible the separation must be for them, and he didn’t want to hurt them more than they already were.

When the Dakota pulled away, Balthazar was reassured to see the man smile despite the tears. Quickly, another Dakota took his place, followed by another and then another. Some were crying, some told him a few words. The olders, especially, told him to look forwards, told him with a wink that things weren’t going to be easy but, in a few years, he’ll be back to the right path.

Balthazar welcomed each and every Dakota with a smile. Giving them all the same goodbyes, the same reassuring touches. He wanted to say more, to talk to them, maybe find out what kind of deaths he went through. But he didn’t want them to think about it. He didn’t want to think about it. He was there. He was alive. Right now, that was all that mattered.

---------------

Balthazar stayed on the dock until the boat was no longer visible in the horizon. He waved at the group who was all too happy to return the gesture. The tall man found himself wishing to cry seeing them all leave after all they did to him. Even if he didn’t know, even if they worked from the shadows, it didn’t change the fact that, without them, Balthazar wouldn’t be there now.

His heart full, Balthazar headed home. He had his own Dakota to see.

---------------

It was late when Balthazar opened the door to a dark office. Vinnie was on the convertible couch, reading something. Seeing that his sunglasses were put away, Balthazar decided not to turn the lights on.

“You were out for a while.”, the shorter man commented as his husband closed the door. “Got lost trying to find a proof of what happened today ?”, he teased.

“It would be a wise thing to do.”, the tall man grumbled. “But no. I went to see the others you.”

“Really ?”, Vinnie lowered his phone to look at him. Balthazar nodded. “Are you saying you’re cheating on me with myself ?”, he continued with a smirk.

“I did not.”, despite usually hating any implication of him being unfaithful, Balthazar didn’t find himself angry as he replied. “None of my interactions went as far as a kiss.”

“Ah. You must’ve disappointed a few of them then.”

“…I hope I didn’t…”, he tried to shake his concern away. “And for your information, I went to tell them goodbye. This is the least I can do for them.”

Vinnie smiled. “You know,”, he said after a chuckle. “I’m sure they’re very happy that you did.”

Balthazar smiled back. But as he approached the bed, he found himself frown again.

“Are you eating in bed ?!”, he criticized.

“What ? You were taking hours to come back. And I got hungry waiting for you.”

“You’re always hungry”, Balthazar mumbled. He went to his side of the room to change in his pajamas. As per usual, he could feel his husband’s gaze as he started removing his clothing. At least he could hear the shorter man standing up and having the decency to put his chips bag away before getting back in bed. Balthazar joined him soon after, sitting next to him. Vinnie rested his head on the taller man’s shoulder, and Balthazar was quick to put an arm around Vinnie’s waist, slowly moving his arm up and down.

“Balth, can I tell you something ?”, the shorter man murmured.

“hmm ?”

“I don’t think you’ll like it. It’s about the others me.”, Vinnie warned.

“…Go ahead, dearest.”, Balthazar replied, planting a kiss on his husband’s head.

“I…I’m not the original Dakota.”, he confessed.

“The original ?”

“Yeah. You know, the one who goes back in time every time you die and takes the place of the one who didn’t see you die.”, he explained. “There’s no Dakota who saw all your deaths.”

“May I…know why this is ?”, Balthazar tried, looking his partner in the eye.

“Honestly I’m not sure. Something about your death being too gruesome or traumatizing I guess. One day, I met another version of me who was all bloody and hurt and all that…and instead of changing with me, he told me how to keep you alive. And then it happened again. And again.”, he chuckled sadly. “I think I’m like, the tenth Dakota. Probably more.”

Balthazar just stayed silent, taking the information in.

“You know, saving you isn’t always a one man’s job. Sometimes the other me helps. Even-even if it means dying. But…I guess dying can be as bad as being sent on an island. I mean sure, being on the island with others me must be fun but…y’know.”, he shrugged, his smile gone and his gaze down.

“…I believe I understand your point.”, the taller man replied, wishing he could find the right words to comfort his partner. He couldn’t even begin to imagine how horrible this situation must have been to live.

He stayed silent for a moment until a question popped into his mind. “Where…where do you think that ‘original’ you is now ? N-not that I wish to replace you of course.”, he quickly added. “Original or not, you’re my Dakota.”

Vinnie chuckled, though that hint of sadness was still present in his eyes.

“He’s probably on the island. Or, y’know, dead after today. Or dead before. Honestly I have no idea how they survive on this island.”

“You…you never visited it before ?”

“When would I have time to do that ?”, his amused tone was back. “You already notice it sometimes when I save you. If I left for several days without explanation, you would definitely notice. And I couldn’t risk it.”

“…I suppose…”, Balthazar wanted to ask more. How long had Vinnie be doing this ? What was his first death ? Why did Vinnie decide to go back ? Why had he never told him before ? How long does he intend on doing this ?...Does Vinnie truly believe that he’s worth all this effort ?

But it was getting late, and the taller man didn’t know if he could take all the answers in one night.

“You’re okay ?”, Vinnie suddenly asked in concern.

“I’m fine.”, he replied. “Why ?”

“Nothing, it’s just…I probably just shattered your entire worldview today and you’re…you’re so calm about it. I thought you’d be freaking out !”

“It’s late.”, Balthazar explained. “And we just had a very long day.”

“We sure did.”

“And don’t forget the few hours I just spent talking to the others you.”, the taller man rested his head on top of Vinnie’s. “Believe me, I still have a lot to ask, and I am feeling overwhelmed by it all.”

“But it’s too much to take in for one night ?”, Vinnie finished.

“It is.”

“Well then,”, the shorter man pulled away, lying down. “Guess we’ll talk tomorrow.”

“I sure hope so.”, Balthazar replied, hoping his tone made it clear that his husband was not going to avoid this conversation. Not that they were any reasons for him to do so. The secret was out. There was nothing to hide now.

Balthazar lied down next to his partner, grabbing the shorter man and pulling him close enough for his back to touch the taller man’s abdomen. Vinnie partly turned his head around and the two shared a kiss.

“Goodnight dear.”, Balthazar murmured after resting his head back onto the pillow.

“ ‘night honey.”, Vinnie murmured back.

Balthazar closed his eyes, letting the warmth and soft breathing of the other man lull him to sleep, preparing himself for a night full of memories, memories of all the moments he could have die, all the moments he found himself somehow saved,

all the moments he now knew Vinnie had been there to save him.

#Milo Murphy's Law #mml #Vinnie Dakota #Balthazar Cavendish #Dakavendish #mml spoilers #my fanfics #angst #as usual #comfort #cw death #death cw #tw death #death tw #though it's just a mention #but better safe than sorry #look as I make Cav a complete softie

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there-must-be-a-lock · 4 years

Text

Set Yourself On Fire

Word Count: ~1550

Warnings: Depression and suicidal thoughts. No, seriously, this is not a happy fic. It centers on Sam and his mental state between seasons three and four, so. Yeah. Demon blood, sad Sam, self-loathing, etc. Some mentions of Sam x Ruby, but the pairing is not the point.

A/N: For @idreamofplaid‘s “Thanks For The Memories” Challenge. My episode was “I Know What You Did Last Summer.”

I snagged bits from a drabble I wrote called “Might As Well,” which was about this same time in Sam’s life, and worked them into this.

Thanks to @fangirlxwritesx67 and @fookinghelljensensthighs for read-throughs, and to @stunudo, @thoughtslikeaminefield, and @lastactiontricia, who helped me work through the fine points of the psychology that was going on here.

Title from the Stars song Your Ex-Lover Is Dead: “When there’s nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire.”

The whiskey stings when Sam splashes it over the cut on his arm. It’s a good kind of pain, blindingly sharp and clean, and for a moment it takes his mind off the slimy ache in his chest and the filthy squirming guilt in his gut.

Dean’s looking at him again, searching and suspicious.

“Why do you trust her so much?” he asks, and Sam doesn’t want to meet his eyes.

“I told you.”

“You got to do better than that. Hey, I’m not trying to pick a fight here. I mean, I really want to understand. But I need to know more. I mean, I deserve to know more.”

He does. Dean deserves that and so much better.

Sam tilts the bottle again, watching the booze wash away the blood as it burns him clean, and he takes a sip, as if that’ll do the same thing to the ugly wound in his chest. There isn’t enough whiskey in the world to sanitize his insides.

He knows he can’t tell the whole truth, but Dean deserves to know more. The question is, where does he start?

He could start with the moment the dirt closed over the grave. Sam, Bobby had said, so quietly. Sam, don’t. And it was funny, how much Sam had always wanted that; he always wanted a father figure who would ask him to stay. I can’t, he told Bobby, and he lurched away, staggered to the car, started driving.

He can’t tell Dean about the days that followed, because he doesn’t remember much of them. Two, three, maybe four days slipped away while he hid in a shitty motel, drinking, and the memories that remain are disjointed flashes in his mind: the ugly floral duvet under his cheek as he collapsed face-first into the bed, the cold white bathroom tiles and the bruises they left on his knees, a ceiling fan distorted through salt-swollen eyes as he watched it spinning lazily overhead, the taste of bile, the blood on his knuckles, the broken shard of mirror that he picked up and turned over in his hands for longer than he’ll ever admit.

No. He can’t start there.

“She saved my life,” he says hoarsely, and Dean waits while Sam tries to find the words.

He still hears John, sometimes: Why are you crying? Be strong. Be brave. Get over yourself. Other people got it a lot worse, y’know. Stop feeling sorry for yourself.

He’s gotten better at ignoring John’s voice, over the years, but it’s harder to ignore his memories of Dean. Dean blinking back tears, forcing a smile. It’s going to be okay, Sammy. I’m fine, Sammy, don’t worry about me. He’s always wanted to be like his big brother, and his big brother wouldn’t let himself wallow the way Sam had. His big brother would’ve found a way to fight back.

The crossroads demon had been his only real hope.

Just take me. It’s a fair trade.

The worst part was, that no didn’t really surprise him. Of course his life wasn’t worth the same as Dean’s. Of course it wasn’t enough, he wasn’t enough, to save his brother the way Dean had saved him.

Sam wasn’t sure who he was without Dean, without a mission, without anything to hold onto.

He’d gotten in the car and started driving. He thought about heading West, out to the cliffs and curves of Highway One; the guardrail was so flimsy, and the Pacific would be steely-grey and welcoming. He thought about heading East, all the way to Maine; the shoreline was rocky and rough, and the crabs would find his body. He could go to Florida, drive into a swamp, let the muck swallow him slowly. He could go to the Dakotas, drive out into the desert, park there and wait, and the vultures would descend eventually. He wondered if anyone would notice that he was gone.

He can’t tell Dean that.

So he doesn’t tell Dean about the directionless days. He starts with the day Ruby found him.

He doesn’t tell Dean about the relief he felt, when he thought Ruby was going to kill him. He doesn’t tell Dean about the cold crush of disappointment in his chest when she stabbed the demon instead.

He tells Dean about her new body, “100% socially conscious.” He tells Dean about the plan to find Lilith: “I wanted to go right away.”

Sam had asked, What do you want from me?

A little patience. And sobriety.

Sobriety made it harder to sleep, and insomnia made it even harder to remember what was real. He didn’t feel real. He felt like a faded, dull husk of a person, a sunbleached copy of a photograph instead of a breathing human with a heartbeat. Ruby told him to use his strength, but he didn’t have anything left.

Sam didn’t much care if he died, and some days he wasn’t even sure he was still alive.

He can’t tell Dean that.

He sees the way Dean looks at him sometimes. He sees the exhaustion in Dean’s eyes, the worry flickering behind that, and Sam doesn’t want to add to the weight on his big brother’s shoulders.

Ruby said, Just give it time, Sam. It'll get better. I'm not talking about pulling demons. I know losing Dean was…

I don't want to talk about it.

The anger tasted ashy in his mouth. It burned, but in a purifying way, like a forest fire clearing the land for new growth. The anger helped him focus. He balled his hands into fists, imagined punching her, imagined that pretty face swollen and bleeding.

He doesn’t tell Dean about that.

You know what? Where do you get off slapping me with that greeting-card, time-heals crap? What the hell do you know? I used to be human. And I still remember what it feels like to lose someone. I'm sorry.

He almost did punch her, at that.

When she kissed him, it was Dean’s voice in the back of his head saying, this is wrong. He shoved her away.

“I knew it was wrong,” Sam confesses, and he can’t meet Dean’s eyes. “But…”

He didn’t care, in the moment. It was his brother’s opinion that had always mattered; he always wanted to make Dean proud. But Dean was dead, and Sam had been drifting for so long, and Ruby’s skin was warm and soft and real under his hands.

It was more like a battle than a kiss. It was teeth and claws, ripping each other apart, but every bite and every scratch felt like a reminder that Sam was still alive.

“Sam?” Dean snaps. “Too much information.” And there it is, there’s the disgust Sam knew was coming. Dean’s lip curls and Sam feels like a child again, clumsy and stupid next to his strong, steady anchor of a big brother.

The half-truth sits uncomfortably in his throat, and Sam has to work to get it past his lips: “I’m coming clean.”

There’s something monstrous inside him, something warped and wrong. There’s always been something wrong with him.

He thinks of the vial in his pocket, the burst of copper on his tongue like a mushroom cloud, the silent dare in Ruby’s big dark eyes and the way she sighs when he slices her open. It burns a little hotter every time he drinks, and he must be charred and black inside by now.

He hasn’t felt clean for a long time.

That’s the thing about fire, though; it cleanses, purifies, and maybe he’ll burn up hot enough to take Lilith with him someday. Self-immolation seems inevitable, at this point. His life doesn’t mean much, but maybe his death will.

“Pretty soon after that,” Sam says, “I put together some signs. Omens. Lilith was in town, and I wanted to strike her first.” Ruby had looked so goddamn concerned, when she realized, and Sam had hated her for it. You don’t want to survive this. This isn't what Dean would've wanted. This isn't what he died for.

“She came after me,” Sam says. “She saved me.”

He hesitates.

He doesn’t tell Dean about the blood.

Sam remembers the night after that failed attack. He remembers watching Ruby cut herself for the first time: his stomach roiling and his skin crawling, the blood welling up and beading into shiny pearls of red. He imagined it sliding down his throat and staining his guts that same dark crimson.

He doesn’t tell Dean about the way it sizzled on his lips, crackled and sparked inside him, lit him up in a whole new way. He doesn’t tell Dean about the next demon, the way the black oily smoke poured out all at once, faster than he’d ever seen it leave a human before, and the way his veins sang with the power.

He doesn’t tell Dean about the too-hot shower afterward, when the fizz was long gone and he scrubbed himself raw trying to get rid of the itch that it left behind.

He didn’t like the way he felt with Ruby, but at least he felt something again.

“If it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t be here,” he tells Dean quietly.

He doesn’t ask, Do you regret dying for me? Was I worth it?

He’s not sure he could live with the answer.

If you enjoyed this, please reblog or leave a note here!

@winchesterprincessbride @ultimatecin73 @mrswhozeewhatsis @mogaruke @babypieandwhiskey @amanda-teaches @hannahindie @fandom-princess-forevermore @just-a-touch-of-sass-and-fandoms @maddiepants @waywardbaby @covered-byroses @dean-winchesters-bacon @atc74 @onethirstyunicorn @tumbler-tidbits @67-chevy-baby @wayward-and-worn @geekgirl1213 @notyourtypicalrose @myfanficlibrarium @calaofnoldor @indecisive20something @carryonmyswansong @sycochick @michellethetvaddict @jotink78 @boondoctorwho @itmighthavebeenintentional @mskathywriteswords @cracksinthewalls @rockhoochie @67midnightwriter @deanwanddamons

#plaid and the memories #sam winchester fanfiction #sam winchester #supernatural fic

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obsidiancreates · 3 years

Text

Blood Blooms In The Crystal Glow (Chapter Six)

Cavendish scours the room for more crosses. He finds one tiny one, buried in the ashes in the fireplace. He briefly wonders if it used to belong to one of the vampires.

The chain is still in tact, though. He puts it around his neck, and tucks it into his vest to hopefully avoid damaging it when not using it. The chain isn’t very long, so it sticks out a tiny bit, but Cavendish thinks it’s better that way. He can yank it into view quickly if need be.

He tries to find another, but no luck. Ah well. Dakota can have the large one by the door, when they eventually leave.

When he eventually wakes.

... Cavendish goes back to looking for things. He needs to be busy.

And then finally, after what feels like far too long (but is really less than half an hour), he hears Dakota groan.

He turns and sees Dakota sitting up, hand on his head. “Mmph... did we crash th’ car again?”

Cavendish feels a moment of panic. “We don’t have the time car anymore, remember?”

“... Oh yeah.” Dakota rubs his head. “So why’s my head splitting?”

Cavendish walks closer, making the floorboard creak rather loudly, and Dakota winces. “You were injured fighting the vampires. They tosses you into a wall.”

Dakota pauses rubbing his head, and his hand goes to his neck. “... Oh. Right. That. Wait, but how did we get here, then? How am I not vampire chow?”

Cavendish puffs up slightly with pride. “I rescued you.”

“You- I was on the other end of the room.”

“I ran back in to save you.”

Dakota’s eyes go wide. “You what?”

“Well, I couldn’t possibly leave you there-”

“I told you to run!”

Cavendish frowns. “Why aren’t you happy? You’re alive, for Pete’s sake.”

“But you could have died!”

“But I didn’t!”

“But you could have! What’s the point if we both die?!”

“I cannot believe- you are being terribly ungrateful!”

Dakota stares at Cavendish. “I’m being ungrateful? You almost got yourself killed, you almost threw away all those times I saved you! You’re the one who needs to live, okay?!”

“Well-well I never asked you to save me!”

Dakota stands up. “Yeah, clearly, you don’t care! You do stupid, life-risking stuff all the time, even after you found out about the island!”

“I’m not going to just sit in a boring room my whole life until old age takes me!”

“But you’re always going after dangerous stuff! The aliens, the artifacts, this entire situation is your fault!”

Cavendish steps back, shocked. He’s never seen Dakota so-so heatedly upset before.

“I was trying to get us a promotion!”

“There’s no point to a promotion if you’re dead!”

“You were on board with this-”

“I wasn’t! At all! I told you that it wasn’t a good idea, but you manipulated me into coming anyway!”

“Why are you yelling?! You never yell!”

“Because I’m mad! You never listen to me, and then when something goes wrong, you blame me even if I didn’t do anything, or if I tried to stop it!”

“I do not!”

“You just did!”

“That-” Cavendish holds his finger up to make a point, and then lowers it. “... Alright, you have a point. But that is one instance.”

“How about crashing the time car into that school? You got mad at me for that even though I tried to help you out!”

“Dakota, I don’t know what’s gotten into to make you act like this-”

Dakota laughs harshly, and Cavendish backs away again. Oh dear. They’ve never had a fight this bad, and Dakota is... clearly not handling it well.

“I almost died because you wanted to investigate something dangerous! And when I tried to tell you not to, you made me come with you anyway! Now we might both die, and then what? Then what’s everything been for, if we just end up drained of blood and buried in this creepy forest? That’s not worth a FREAKING PROMOTION, CAVENDISH!”

Cavendish backs away again. He bumps against the side wall of the room, opposite to Dakota. “Okay, Vinne, perhaps we need to calm down, I think your head injury might be making your logic a little faulty-”

Dakota huffs incredulously. “You did it again! You’re always looking down on me! You think I’m stupid, but I’m the only one between the two of us who hasn’t died!”

Cavendish feels a pang of-of some kind of emotional hurt in his chest. “That’s not fair to bring up! I only died because I take risks! I take chances! All you do is eat snacks and try to find the easy way out-”

“BECAUSE THE HARD WAY OUT ALWAYS GETS YOU KILLED!”

Dakota is starting to walk closer as he shouts. Cavendish has no idea what to do. He didn’t even know Dakota was capable of level of anger. Or any feeling, really, unless it’s excitement about the zoo.

“Vinne, we might have let this blow out of proportion-”

“No, no, we haven’t! This is how it’s been for years, and I’ve been patient about it to make you happy, but it’ll never make you happy, will it? Nothing will EVER make you happy, and I’m betting that promotion still won’t make you happy!”

“Of course it will, it’s important, we’ll be recognized as heroes-”

Dakota has gotten so close so fast. He grabs Cavendish by the shoulders.

“YOU! ARE! MORE! IMPORTANT! THAN! A PROMOTION! WHY CAN’T YOU GET IT THROUGH YOUR SKULL?! I BROKE THE LAW HUNDREDS OF TIME FOR YOU, NOT SOME STUPID PROMOTION! STOP RISKING YOUR LIFE!”

Cavendish shouts as Dakota shakes him while yelling. “But-but we deserve better than trash duty and busywork-”

“MAYBE WE BELONG THERE! MAYBE IT’S THE ONLY WAY TO KEEP YOU FROM RUNNING OFF AND DYING! MAYBE YOU SHOULD GIVE UP AND JUST BE HAPPY WITH WHAT WE’VE GOT!”

Cavendish is about to retort, but as he opens his mouth he falls silent. His eyes widen in horror, and his blood runs cold in his veins.

Dakota’s sunglasses have slipped down his nose. Cavendish can see his eyes.

Dakota’s red eyes.

He stares, horror and denial and sorrow and fear all running through him at once.

Dakota is snarling. But there’s no fangs, at least, no fangs, maybe iit’s a trick of the light, maybe it’s-

Cavendish glances at Dakota’s neck.

On one side, there’s a normal cut. Long, thin, barely bleeding.

On the other...

...

Two pinpricks. He hadn’t noticed them earlier, he was so panicked and busy-

“Dakota, unhand me,” Cavendish says weakly.

“Why? So you can ignore the problems?” Dakota hisses, and his eyes are red, red as blood-

“Dakota, you-you’re going to hurt me-”

Dakota’s eyes widen now, shocked, but then infuriated.

“Why would you say that?”

“Your eyes-”

“Why would you say that?!”

“Dakota-!”

“All I ever do is keep you from getting hurt! My whole life is making sure you are not actively dying! So WHY-”

Dakota- if it still is Dakota, somehow- thumps Cavendish against the wall. Not so hard it hurts, but it makes Cavendish shout fearfully.

“WOULD-’

Thump.

“YOU-”

Thump.

“SAY THAT!”

Thump.

The cross around Cavendish’s neck is jostled out of his vest, now in full view.

Dakota reels back, eyes wide and terrified, and Cavendish wastes no time. He dives for the cross by the door, putting it between himself and his partner.

Dakota stands still for a second, panting, eyes still red.

And then after a moment, the red fades. Dakota’s terror turns to confusion.

And then horror.

He tucks his hands under his. “What just- what just happened?” he croaks.

Cavendish stays by the cross, eyes fixed on Dakota. He’s keeping himself tucked up, sitting on the floor, like the cross is a shield he needs to take cover under.

Dakota looks at Cavendish, crying a little. “I-I didn’t mean that, Cav. I really didn’t mean it, I-I don’t know what came over me. I like how ambitious you are, I do, it can just be a little frustrating sometimes. I didn’t...”

“I-I’m sorry. I don’t know what happened, I’m sorry. I didn’t- I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

Cavendish rubs the back of his head. It’s a little sore, but nothing that will last.

But Dakota doesn’t know that, of course. “I- oh man, I didn’t- here, let me help you up-”

He reaches for Cavendish, and his hand brushes the cross.

He jerks it back, hissing in pain and rubbing his hand.

But, Cavendish notes, still no fangs.

Dakota stops holding his own hand, and terrified realization begins to dawn on his face.

He looks down, and shakes his head.

He reaches to help Cavendish up again, and again his hand brushes against the cross-

He yanks it back just like before, and this time Cavendish sees a little red mark. Not quite like a burn, but still a mark.

Dakota looks at his hand. Looks at the mark.

Both of his hands start to shake.

“Cav? What’s-what’s happening to me?”

Cavendish swallows. “Dakota...”

“I-I think you were bitten.”

#milo murphy's law #vinne dakota #balthazar cavendish #vampires #blood mention #fighting tw #minor injury tw #fanfic #my attempts at fanfic #Proofreading? Don't know her

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claramurphyqueenoffandoms · 4 years

Text

Well, I had a weird dream last night. At least, I think it was all a dream. Parts of it might have been me imagining it while I was half-asleep, I don’t know.

So, it starts out, Milo is in a coma. He was on an adventure with Cavendish and Dakota, but Murphy’s Law happened. Some alien generator or a portal exploded or something, and he got hurt, like way worse than usual. Now he won’t wake up. The doctors called Milo’s family, and Cavendish and Dakota are there waiting for them. They feel just awful because they let him get hurt (though it wasn’t actually their fault) and Cavendish takes out this pocketwatch. I think he was gonna give it to Milo as a birthday present, but now he can’t. But he gives it to Dakota, who loops it around and puts it on Milo like a necklace. I could see them saying something like ‘please, kid, come back.’

But this whole time Milo’s asleep or in a coma, he’s aware of what’s going on except he can’t hear them. I couldn’t hear them either (but the dreamers get special privileges like knowing what’s being said without hearing it, I guess). All he can hear are these weird ethereal singing voices that keep glitching in and out. Suddenly, the whole world kind of glitches, and he wakes up, and he and his hospital bed are in this weird room with these four other people.

…Okay, this might be a good time to tell you, this dream was basically VoicePlay’s “Queen in 5 Minutes,” but with all Disney XD characters. (I think it was because I’d been watching the video on loop basically all afternoon, including right before I went to bed. Because that video is seriously awesome.)

So these four other DXD characters are the gods of Death in this multiverse.

- Varian was Layne/Guardian, and he was wearing this grey furry vest and carrying a sword. But as soon as I saw him, I thought, he’s got Cass’s sword and Quirin’s vest. So that was super cool.

- Stan Pines was Eli/Yama Nirvana, and his 8-ball cane was gold.

- Scrooge McDuck was Geoff/Baron, and he was wearing his normal clothes, except the collar was red and the rest was black.

- Wander was J. None/Anubis. He was wearing this jacket with the star from his hat all over it.

Also, they all had the face paint on them. It was probably not very much like the video, it was kind of vague, but they did all have some kind of face paint designs.

Okay, so they’re the gods of death in the DXD multiverse. All of them died at one point or another (and most of their shows died too), so they were given the choice to either pass on or become gods of death. Scrooge was a little different, because his show wasn’t dead, but I think what it was was kind of like the Doctor, but also kind of like that Greek myth about Persophone, where every time something happens that kills him, he goes and has to do a shift as a god of death, then comes back. I just kinda knew that was the case, though, I don’t think they said it. I kinda want to figure out how on earth he got into a situation like that. (Now that I think about it, though, that’d probably be why there are so many hiatuses.) But the whole point is, when Milo went into his coma, they saw he was gonna die, and so they shifted reality to bring him into this special inbetween room. If he gives in here, he gets to be a god of death with them (basically forever).

So they all got introduced to Milo, by their names appearing beside their heads like in the video. Which Milo could apparently read. And after they’re all introduced, Wander just dances over to Milo and yanks his heart out, singing cheerfully. Man, he don’t care. He takes the scales out of his hat to weigh it. Once he’s done, he puts it all back in his hat, and throws that off to the side. Then Milo falls out of his bed, and in this he knows they’re all from cartoons and stuff, and he’s like, I think my writers are forgetting about me, so that’s why I’ve been so weak ever since I got back (from Octalia I guess?) So he’s actually getting scared, because he doesn’t have his backpack, he’s not being backed by his writers, and he’s not strong enough to fight back on his own, and he’s all alone. His friends won’t find him here.

And he was imagining them wandering through this weird mystical dimension hospital—Zack, Melissa, Cavendish, and Dakota—sneaking around, trying to find him without getting caught. They kept avoiding the other people in the hospital. I’m not sure what qualified as a patient and what qualified as a doctor or nurse or something, but they had to avoid them both. They kept almost running into Bill Cipher as a human, which was something they had to avoid or something very bad would happen to them. They met Baby Cavenpus, I think. And Richard Maxwell. Which didn’t quite make sense, because he’s not from a DXD show? But whatever. They also kept seeing these five shadowy figures down at the end of hallways, and I kept thinking they were like the ghosts of VoicePlay or something. But the MML group met some of the patients in the hospital, which were… let me think, I seem to remember Ford, and Quirin, and… dang it, what was the purple horse’s name? … yeah, I don’t remember. Maybe it’ll come to me later. But anyway, they were all patients, and trying to escape, and find their friends/family (I guess not knowing they were now gods of death). So they teamed up with the MML gang to find their friends. But they passed right by where Milo’s room was, because it didn’t have a door, or maybe it was invisible.

Then it went back to Milo. He thought they were actually passing by his room, or thought he saw them, and he yelled for them, but they didn’t hear him. And he wonders why they couldn’t find him. Then Scrooge puts his cane under Milo’s chin like in the video and says this isn’t a plane of reality people can just find. Milo is actually scared now, too scared to move. Where did I go wrong, he wonders? Scrooge lifts his cane and makes him stand, and he tells him he’s done nothing wrong, it’s not about that. No, it’s not exactly fair, but neither is life. And he takes his cane back and starts singing the part from the song. The other three are just glaring at him the whole time, partly because he’s the only one who’s still technically alive. But he slams his cane into the floor and makes Milo fall back onto the bed, and he sings the part about bad mistakes, and “I-I-I-I’ve made a fe-e-ew.” He didn’t even sound like Geoff, he literally sounded like Scrooge McDuck singing. The others are rolling their eyes, like, yeah, a few. But he’s ignoring them, and says he’s had to deal with all that, but he came through in the end. And the others are singing the background parts about “He could go on and on and on…”

He does this evil laugh (well, maybe not evil, but you know what I mean) and he looked like he was about to continue, but then Stan and Wander and Varian start singing “We Are the Champions” all together, and Scrooge just gives them a death glare like, you wicked warblers, ye stole mah part. But they’re totally ignoring him, except for Stan, who’s just flaunting it. And Milo’s here in the middle of it, watching this whole rivalry thing play out. Wander and Varian are ignoring all that, though, just singing at the top of their lungs, and Wander dancing around, and being so friendly to Varian and getting him to have fun and dance around with him, and they seriously looked like they were having a super fun time, those two. #cinnamonrolls I think they’re trying to get Milo to dance and sing too, and he almost looked like he wanted to, but he held back. But while Wander and Varian are completely ignoring the rivalry of the other two, Stan sings right in Scrooge’s face, and Scrooge does the thing in Stan’s eye like “No time for losers,” and Stan starts to get mad.

So then he starts yelling at Scrooge, and everyone else shuts up to watch. I’m not entirely sure how this whole part went, but it was a lot about the rivalry. I think it might have played twice in the dream. The first time he was getting mad specifically at Scrooge, because they were partners(-in-crime) and worked together to make money, but Scrooge went on and did his own thing, got rich and successful and all. Oh, wow, just like his brother. But yeah, he was mad about it, and he’s like, yeah, you happy about that? Then… you know, I think it did play twice. The second time, he was just talking about his life in general. And Stan’s like, you think you had it tough, Mister Zillionaire? Look at all the crap I had to put up with, and all the stuff I had to pull to fix that stupid portal, and save my stupid brother, and I still died trying to stop a stupid triangle, and you’re talking about troubles? I had to stand ALL the heat, how long can you do it? How long before you have to face the bullets and die like the rest of us? And guess what, you might still have some kind of life, that might be your little solo here, but death is OUR beat. This time, it’s our call. We get to decide what happens now. It was actually kind of a cool speech.

And I think it kind of gets the others on his side about this, and they join in the argument. They all want to decide what happens to Milo now, so they’re going back and forth about it. I think Stan wants to decide for himself, Wander wants to take him somewhere else, Varian wants them to stick to the rules, and nobody is sure what Scrooge wants. Then they all just jump in at the same time to grab Milo, to pull him to whatever fate they decide, or to keep the others from taking him, because they all have different ideas of what his fate should be. And it’s like in the video, where they’re all surrounding him, and Stan’s cane and Varian’s (well, Cass’s) sword crossed over his chest.

Of course, Milo is freaking out over this whole process. I mean, how would you like four gods of Death fighting over you with their weapons at your throat? He shuts his eyes tight and just screams PLEASE STOP, I CAN’T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!! The others stop pulling at him, but just stay right where they are. I can’t handle this, he says, it’s just too much pressure. All of you trying to drag me away to my death. But then he starts singing “Pressure” from his show, instead of the song from this part in the video. Musical accompaniment from nowhere, of course, for literally the only time in the dream. And… wait, were there words? I think there were. I think he sang his own lyrics to it, but I have no idea what they were. Dang it, why can’t I ever remember the songs in my dreams??

But the others are like, well fine, fair point, but we’re the gods of death here, whaddya WANT US to do? And he just replies by singing the part from the song “I want to break FREE-E-E-E!” and throws his hand in the air. And for some reason that knocks all of them back, and they’re all really confused. But Milo just looks at them and he’s like, you really don’t care what happens to me, you just care about yourself and this crazy rivalry. You don’t need me, and I don’t need any of this. Well if your so smart, what do you think you need, they ask? And he says, I don’t know what I need. All I know is I want to break free from all this. They shake their heads as they step closer. ‘Fraid you can’t do that. It’s not your choice. And the lights go dim, because time’s almost up. Milo realizes now: he’s about to die.

I think here it went back to the MML gang and the patients. Because apparently they aren’t just in Milo’s imagination anymore, and they’re just randomly really there. The whole thing could’ve been Milo’s dream, but I kinda don’t think so. But they saw the lights in the hospital go dim, and somehow knew that meant Milo was going to die. Maybe the patients knew, like Ford or something. So they rushed to find him quick. But then they went around a corner and ran right into the human Bill Cipher. He looked a little like the tall red guy in Hazbin Hotel, except yellow and black, and, you know, BILL. (I haven’t watched the show, but I’ve seen a few clips in music videos) So they all ran away, and he kept chasing them through the halls of the hospital. Here it kinda turned into nightmare, because it seemed like we just couldn’t get away. (oh and in this part of the dream, I was seeing it through Cavendish’s eyes, not just watching it happen). At one point, I think the patients turned around to fight him, but he made the blue chains appear around their necks and pulled them back to him. Then he started chasing us again. When he was chasing us, they weren’t there, though. We couldn’t get away. It was like almost every time we turned a corner to get away from him, he was there where we were about to go, ready to spring. We kept running, but he finally cornered us. The patients were there again, floating chained in the air behind him and struggling to get free. I think it was only Ford and Quirin this time though? Not… SYLVIA! That was her name! Sylvia. But she wasn’t there at the time for whatever reason. But we were cornered, and I was just so upset (well, Cavendish was). Cavendish said he let Milo get hurt and he’s about to die, and now he’s led two more kids and his best friend right into Death’s hands. He says he’s sorry to them, and whispers it to Milo, like “I’m sorry, Milo.”

Well, I don’t know if you’d say Milo felt that or what, but I think he did. In his last few moments, Milo looks down and finds the pocketwatch Cavendish and Dakota gave him, and he touches it and thinks about them. They’re like these crazy sci-fi uncles to him, but they’re really his friends. And then he remembers his family, and Zack and Melissa and his other friends, and he just really hopes they think of him after all this, because he misses them a lot. The moment he gives in, he’ll be losing all of them.

I feel like there was a part of the dream that I remembered here that didn’t actually happen before, where Bill said that Cavendish and Dakota were supposed to die, and he’d let the other two go if they agreed to stay, because he’d been cheated out of getting Cavendish way too many times, so he wanted them both now. He couldn’t let Milo go, because he was in with the gods of Death, nobody can get him out of there. And I think Cavendish and Dakota just looked at each other and nodded, and Dakota told the other two to say bye to Milo for them, and Cavendish stepped up to shake Bill’s hand. Of course the thing about it is that I just kind of remembered this as happening, in the middle of the scene with Milo, but I hadn’t seen it happen. Dreams are weird.

But I remembered that happening, and I thought, well, Milo is still losing them all. He’s losing C&D to death and losing all the others to life. He can never see any of them again until the moment they die. And this time, the others around him are just quiet. They all had to leave people behind when this happened, too, and they know this is the case for all of them. Most of them are also remembering the people they lost in life too (Scrooge lost Della, Stan lost Ford, Varian lost Quirin). So they know how this poor kid feels. But they’re like, they say it should be easy, but even though it isn’t, these are the rules. This is how you gotta play the game, and now it’s your turn. Just give in.

And it was at that moment that I suddenly thought, wait, did you seriously just invite Milo freaking Murphy to play a freaking game?

Well, I think Milo must have had the same thought, because he stands up on his bed and rips out all the cords and IVs hooked up to him. Then the lights suddenly undim and he looks around at them and he says, you know what, you can knock me right down with whatever you’ve got, but I’m always getting back up again! Then he points right at the camera (or whatever it is in a dream—I remember thinking he was talking to Dan and Swampy) and he sings, you think you can love me and leave me to die? Well, sorry, but you can’t! I’m getting out of here, and I’m getting back to my family and friends, because I’ve got something no game and none of you can beat!

So then, Varian draws Cass’s sword, and he’s like, careful, I like you, but if you try anything crazy, I’m gonna have to use this. But then Milo looks down at his hand, and it starts supercharging with this red energy: Murphy’s Law. He then shoots it right at Varian, who vanishes in a puff of smoke. And here I was aware of two scenes going on at the same time, this one and the one with the others. When Milo shot Murphy’s Law at Varian and made him disappear, Quirin’s chain snapped. When Milo turns and does the same to Stan and Wander, the chains for Ford and Sylvia (who’s back now I guess) snap too. Bill is freaking out because he doesn’t understand what’s happening (and neither do the MML gang). But I think they can hear the song going on, and they know Milo’s doing something. And Milo does the exact line from the song, “I’ll face it with a grin, I’m never giving in, oh no,” while Scrooge is giving him this smile that says, go on lad, you’ve earnt it. He shoots Scrooge with Murphy’s Law, and he vanishes too. Bill gets knocked back on the ground when that happens, and the wall nearby turns into a door. So the MML gang run toward it, because it’s Milo’s door. Then Milo turns right toward the camera and sings “SHOW MUST GO ON!” before turning around and walking up to the curtains behind his bed. Behind him, the others come through the door. He opens the curtains…

And wakes up in his bed. Cavendish and Dakota sit up straight in their chairs and gasp. They look at each other like, wait we’re still here? Was that real? But then Milo groans, and they see he’s there and he’s alive. And they both come over and hug him. Milo just says, thanks guys. Then Zack and Melissa rush in, and when they see Milo, they give each other the same kind of looks C&D just did. Then they run over and hug Milo too. It’s a very happy tearful reunion, and then it fades out into white, just like the video.

And I mean, that’s not exactly the end of the dream, because then there was this kind of dream epilogue or something, where the four guys are just watching the happy ending from the white place that the ending faded into. They’re actually looking pretty pleased. I think they cheer when Milo’s family comes in a minute later. They start talking about how it was better he didn’t become one of them just yet, he’s still got his life to live. Stan looks over at Scrooge and is like, I bet you just set the whole thing up to prove it, huh? Prove the kid? And Scrooge replies, believe me, I wasn’t about to rouse your rivalry without a very good reason.

But what about that dreamtime death demon, he asks? And Stan’s like, don’t you worry, I think there’s some people that’ll be more than ready to give him his. Cue Bill getting up surrounded by Ford, Quirin, and Sylvia. He laughs and says, you really think you’re gonna be able to stand up to me, with the power I have over you? Ford says not really, but they probably will, and thumbs behind him. And the ghosts of VoicePlay come up and they look mad, because Bill messed with their reality and put it together with all these others and made it all crazy like this, so they go beat him up.

Stan and Scrooge laugh. But now they don’t have anything to do, because Milo was the last thing on their list. So Wander is just like, let’s have a dance party, and Varian’s like, yeah man, let’s do it, and highfives him. Or however many fingers they have. And they just start dancing, to… I don’t know what the song was. It might’ve just been made up. Or maybe it was part of the actual song? I don’t know. And I think there might’ve been more, like another dream, but I don’t really remember it. I think it was another one with VoicePlay.

So yeah, that’s about it. I just spent the last three hours typing that up, as soon as I got up, so hopefully it’s good? It’s just so bizarre, but also kind of cool? And I haven’t had cool dreams like this in a while, so it was definitely welcome. I guess it’s kind of an indicator of what’s going on in my brain these days.

(now I kinda wanna fic it)

#crazy dreams #disney xd #VoicePlay #milo murphy's law #gravity falls #ducktales #tangled: the series #wander over yonder #Adventures in odyssey #(slightly)

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aelaer · 5 years

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Whumptober 15: Scars

Don’t ask me where this came from; I wanted to write something short. This is the opposite of short.

Characters: Stephen Strange, Beverly Strange, Eugene Strange, Donna Strange Warnings: Just a bucket-load of angst. Canonical death by drowning, as well.

15. Scars

Stephen got his first scar right on his inner wrist from before his memory got particularly good, because from what he knew, he always had it. Mom claimed that it was all Aunt Nancy's fault that he fell down in the first place, but Aunt Nancy was a rather tall and somewhat scary woman, so he never pursued it when he wondered about it and forgot the story when she was less scary and more annoying.

At age twelve, the scars were the remnants of hard play found on a farm in northern Nebraska. He was particularly impressed with the one on his knee that he got from a tree at school that he successfully climbed up but not so successfully climbed down. It was bleeding everywhere and it hurt so badly but at the same time it was really cool and he couldn't stop watching the doctors as they stitched him back up. He taught himself how to stitch after that, stealing Mom's supplies and trying to copy the stitches on his jeans and shirts, then Donna's stuffed animals, and then copying the ones he saw in a book from the library about surgeons and surgery.

Even Dad was impressed when he heard that he wanted to be a doctor, after his initial freakout about him stealing Mom's supplies to learn sewing. "Doctors help a lot of people, and unlike teachers, you can make good money from it." He didn't really consider the money when he started, but that sounded like a pretty nice perk, and he really didn't want to be a teacher anyway. Donna wanted to be the teacher, and told Dad that she didn't care about the stupid money, anyway. He laughed and told her, "Okay," and the conversation ended.

He worked throughout his junior and senior years to get all the money he needed to apply to universities all around the country. His physics teacher was a decent sort and pointed out all the best schools and where he could apply for grants and financial aid. He was on track to be valedictorian of his high school graduating class of a whopping size of 26 people, and that wasn't quite like a graduating class of 100 or 600 but it was still something.

Then he got accepted into Columbia University with a full ride scholarship. He freaked out. His principal freaked out. His physics teacher freaked out. One of them told the rest of the faculty in his school, and they all freaked out.

His parents also freaked out, but not in the same way as his principal and teacher.

"Columbia," Mom said with a light frown. "Isn't that in New York?"

"Yeah," he said.

"That's a bit far, Stephen," Mom said, and something deep within him twinged with hurt.

"Don't be daft, Beverly," Dad replied. "They're offering to pay for everything. He's gonna be gone for med school anyway after."

"There's a medical school at UNO," she replied. "Also ones at USD, DMU, and UMKC. And that hardly matters for undergrad; he can go to a school in Omaha or Lincoln, or maybe somewhere in South Dakota or Iowa."

"Yeah, but they're not paying for it," Dad argued.

Stephen decidedly did not tell them when he got a full ride scholarship to USD two weeks later.

Mom eventually accepted he was going to Columbia whether she liked it or not and didn't bring it up again for a long time.

———

At age nineteen, his most prominent scars were internal, written by the complete anguish and fury of his younger sister's death the summer after his first year of college. He should have known something was wrong when she didn't come up from the lake immediately. He should have known and pulled her from its depths faster, performed CPR faster, and Donna would still be alive and entering her senior year of high school and figuring out where she wanted to go to college to become an elementary school teacher.

But Donna was dead. Dead, drowned Donna.

His parents never said they blamed him, but Stephen knew that they did, because he was the one studying to become a doctor and he had failed to see the signs and rescue her fast enough. Of course they blamed him.

Two weeks after they buried Donna, he couldn't stand it anymore and rescheduled his flight back to New York for that weekend. If his parents couldn't take him, he'd call for a shuttle. He didn't want to spend the money he earned tutoring on things like shuttles, but he'd rather do that than spend any more time in that house.

Two days before his flight, his parents called him down to the kitchen. Dad was holding a beer; he spent the last two weeks holding a beer.

"Stephen," Mom started, clinging her hands together. "We'd like to talk with you."

An ominous feeling settled in the depths of his gut. "About?"

"Sit down," Dad said, voice gruff with grief, and he did so.

"It's been—" Mom's voice stopped, and she cleared her throat. "It's been a very, very hard summer, Stephen. The worst four weeks of my life." He nodded in agreement, and waited patiently as Mom got a hold of her emotions again. "It's— it's a reminder to us, how— how life can change in an instant. How little time we actually have. And, and Stevie—" He froze at the nickname; she rarely used it, per his request some several years ago, and when it slipped out he often did not like what she had to say next. "We see you so rarely. You're so far."

Stephen cleared his throat. "I visit during Christmas. I made Easter, too."

Mom shook her head. "That's not enough, not when it can—" She swallowed and heaved a shuddering breath.

"What your mother is trying to say," said Dad, "is that we want you to transfer to somewhere closer. Omaha, Lincoln, South Dakota, maybe even Des Moines or Kansas City, though the first three are preferable."

He stared at them. "You want me to transfer and pay thousands of dollars to go to a worse school?"

"They're all fine schools," Dad argued. "And— don't worry about costs. We'll handle that."

"With what money?" he asked, incredulous.

"Don't worry about it," he repeated, more strongly this time and in a tone that demanded respect. Stephen considered arguing, anyway, but Dad continued onward before he could. "The money's beside the point, anyway. The school's are a bit far to drive to every day, but you can come home on the weekends."

"You're asking me to throw away the opportunities a place like Columbia University can give me for— for what? To make yourselves feel better?"

"Stephen!" Dad shouted.

Mom put a hand on Dad's arm. "Eugene," she murmured, then looked back at him. "Family is all we have, Stephen."

"Family is all you have," he argued. "I have a future, a career waiting for me beyond all this. And I'm not going to kill my future just because Donna's dead!"

That stunned them into silence. He could tell Dad was furious, too. He continued before he could lose his nerve. "And I've already booked a flight to go back to New York on Saturday. I'm going to the airport whether you drive me or not." He stood up and ignored Dad's angry shout at his back, and he left the house to walk for a while.

Late Friday night, Mom came to his room and asked him quietly, "What time do you need to be at the airport?"

He ignored the pang of guilt in his heart at her voice. "By noon."

"We'll leave at ten," she said, and he nodded and she left without saying good night.

The next morning she drove him to Eppley Airfield in Omaha. The ride was silent and Stephen tried to banish the silence by reading one of his textbooks.

About five minutes away from the airport, Mom asked, "Are you sure about this, Stephen?"

He couldn't look at her. "I'm sure," he muttered at the window.

She told him, "Be safe," and he nodded and the conversation ended.

————

The scars on his heart began to harden as they took on layers. More came that Christmas, when, against his better judgement, he agreed to his mother's pleas to visit over the holiday. She asked him to stay the whole winter break, but he lied and said he had an intersession class in January and could only stay a week. He didn't want to have to reschedule for his own sanity; he wasn't sure if he could handle his mother's disappointment if he did.

She was still disappointed, but over Christmas, the disappointment was largely overwhelmed by the grief of the first Christmas without Donna. None of them attempted to really change the atmosphere, beyond his mother's half-hearted results the first two days he was back in Nebraska. But it was too difficult an illusion to continue with his sister's spectre haunting every room, every tradition, and every memory.

His father was drinking a six-pack a day throughout his time there. From what he could see, this was business as usual.

Stephen only approached him on the subject the day after Christmas. "You're going to kill your liver at the rate you're drinking those."

"It's my liver to kill," his father replied.

He fell to silence and left the matter alone after that.

When he got back to New York and the faculty was back at Columbia, he talked with his advisor on taking a full summer course and any intersession courses available to cut his already fast-tracked graduation date of three and a half years down to three.

After he told his mother that he was staying in New York over the summer to graduate even earlier than planned, her weekly calls became bi-monthly, and slowly petered out to once a month by the time he graduated.

Throughout the rest of undergrad, he never went back to Nebraska.

————

After graduating, he spent a year working in a laboratory as he applied for as many schools with a combined MD-PhD program as he could afford. By the end of that year, he was back at Columbia within their rigorous program.

He completed it in a new record time. His advisors called him a prodigy. One told him that if his research continued down this new, innovative path, that he may yet change the field of neurosurgery. He didn't outright say Nobel Prize, but he didn't have to.

He entered his residency at the Columbia-affiliated New York-Presbyterian Hospital while still in his mid-twenties, on track to being a full-fledged neurosurgeon in his early thirties.

The monthly calls from his mother were no longer monthly. He didn't remember the last time he talked to his father.

Not too long after he turned thirty, he got a call in between shifts from his parents' landline (as they really didn't do cellphones; the service out on the farm was apparently terrible). He answered, "Hello mother," trying to keep as polite and patient as he was able.

"Not her," came the gravelly voice of his father, and he sounded awful. "But it's about her."

"What?" Stephen straightened in his seat. "What is it?"

His father didn't say anything for a moment, then: "She's got ovarian cancer. Stage four."

Oh God. "Where is she?"

"Overnight in Omaha. I'm driving back down early tomorrow." Another pause. "Your mom wants to see you."

He swallowed. "I'll— I'll see what I can do."

And he did. Residents didn't get that much time off, but Stephen hadn't taken a day off barring a horrible flu two years ago. He was permitted a couple days leave, and at the encouragement of a fellow resident by the name of Christine, asked for a few days around Christmas as well. He was granted them.

It wasn't a very happy Christmas, but his mother seemed genuinely pleased to see him, and he did his best to keep his spirits high around her, even as his father silently drank nearby.

On Christmas Eve, he found her thumbing a card when she thought he was not looking. Stephen later picked it up and found it was a Christmas card made by him when he was seven-years-old, signed by both him and Donna's childish signatures, and addressed to Mom and Dad.

He realized he did not remember when they stopped being Mom and Dad.

————

Beverly Strange died in the autumn of the following year. After her funeral, he did not return to Nebraska until his father passed away two years later from liver failure.

The service was small and their assets easily determined his. For some reason, he did not immediately put the farm up for sale the moment it became his.

As his paycheck steadily increased, he paid for the farm's upkeep and for someone to maintain it, but as the idea of selling or even leasing it entered his mind, he pushed it away for another day until the maintenance just became a monthly automatic payment that left his account. It eventually stopped entering his thoughts at all.

The scars on his heart remained. Christine, fellow-resident-now-fellow-doctor, tried to chip away at it, and she was partially successful in a way that few were. But even she could only do so much and her efforts eventually fell to the wayside.

Ten years after his mother's death, the most prominent of his scars to the naked eye were the blatant lines crossing both of his malformed hands.

But they were far from the first.

————

Notes:

I was going to write a short thing about his hands. Then this happened instead.

I know a brother, Victor, exists, but I honestly have no idea how to incorporate him into MCU Stephen's life, so he's just… not mentioned. Sorry Victor.

I presumed that, like most schools in California, that the unis in the Midwest are referred to by their acronyms. If I'm incorrect, please let me know!

College acronyms:

UNO = University of Nebraska Omaha

USD = University of South Dakota

DMU = Des Moines University

UMKC = University of Missouri, Kansas City

For those unfamiliar with American slang, a "full ride scholarship" straight out of high school means that the university is paying for your tuition, all educational supplies, and often boarding for all four years. While universities often give grants for parts of education based on both merit and financial need (ranging from a few hundred to tens of thousands of dollars, depending on the university), full rides are much rarer and to the top universities in the country, even moreso.

To put this in perspective, I have a real life example: one of my friends in high school was valedictorian of a graduating class of 600. Her merit plus her family's very poor financial status got her a full ride to Stanford. The tuition alone to Stanford (a private, world-famous university) is $50,000; with housing and supplies, it's closer to $60,000 a year. She got all of that paid by the university (yeah, these private universities have a stupid amount of money). She worked her ass off for that scholarship, though. I think she also became a medical doctor, funny enough. But anyway, I imagine Stephen getting something similar as, along with the majority of families in the US being completely unable to afford private university's astronomical costs, Nebraska's cost of living is nothing compared to New York's — wasn't in the 90's, and it's probably a larger gap now. So combined merit/financial-based scholarships for such schools are pretty common.

#whumptober2019 #no.15 #scars #stephen strange #doctor strange fanfic #genre: angst #my writing #my fanfiction

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polygamyff · 4 years

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33. Part 5

Am I being harsh with him, am I doing too much because to be honest I know the people in this Starbucks heard my voice which he deserved, he really acting so clam and cool like what he said and did was even good enough. I was giving the number back to her, why the hell was she even giving you the number, how did it even escalate to that point. I am so angry at him and it’s because he really fucking did that to me, in the public and they all fucking saw this asshole flirting, making me look stupid in front of Kellen, there I was in Dubai acting like my life is perfect, I changed this man and he loves me. I sat front row just for him to make me look fucking dumb, I am not even going to forgive him now even if he follows me. His fucking driver can take him, I actually would prefer if he just walks away and then work out the logistics of Reign, he can see her but he can go and fuck himself and that bitch Dakota, I need to calm down. I feel like I have lost a lot, my home, my car and now my mind and even then my dignity because he makes me look so stupid. I swear to god he does nothing but upset and play me a fool, how could he and even then he thinks he has done nothing wrong, I could say to him you flirted with that girl and he looks at me like I am lying, he doesn’t see it because he is a fucking whore. I just don’t get why he needs to do that, does he not think I am good enough, am I not good enough. Unlocking my car door, well not my fucking car, I am a mess and I shouldn’t feel this way with him. I can’t trust him, I really can’t and it’s because he is a flirt, I don’t think he will ever cheat on me but flirts so much, he flirts with any fucking woman. Dragging the car door open, I am not shocked that he is following me. Look at him, walking behind me like a lost puppy when this is all his doing. Upset me, then feels bad. Then again, does he even feel bad when he thinks he has done nothing wrong “you want me to sit in the car?” he asked “where else?” sitting inside the car and banging the car door shut, let me not break my dad’ car door.

I am not driving anywhere with him I am just sat in the car thinking to be honest. I am just very annoyed with him, I think it’s more so the fact I love him so much and he disappoints me “what do you want?” I said, I have a headache from this shit “with what?” here he goes, being dumb as fuck “with these bitches you like to flirt with? What else?” I sniggered “you’re a dickhead, you just don’t see it” I can tell he doesn’t “I ain’t that, throughout the night I been thinking of you. I said to her and I kindly declined her, that is why I closed her hand. She gave me her number and I said I love my baby mother no, I don’t want that. I don’t care about no girl” he is laughable “right, so you kindly declined? Is this what we call it now? Mr Davenport being ever so kind by touching her, so tell me how this girl became attracted to you, there is other men there. Why you? What did you do?” looking over at him “nothing, I didn’t do anything” he shrugged “what did you do?” I asked again “nothing!” he spat “you did! You did something, no bitch comes to anyone randomly, what did you you do!?” I shouted “I didn’t do anything! I fucking did nothing!” he shouted back “liar!” I screamed out, I am angry “you’re a liar” my voice broke “you’re lying to me and you don’t see it” he is making me cry and I didn’t want to cry “don’t touch me” hitting his hand away “I think it was probably because I was looking at her because she is a pretty female, I was just looking” wiping the tears that fell “was that hard, you was looking at her, flirting with her with your eyes. You have done it to me before, with your eyes. And don’t touch me, I said what I said!” I spat, I don’t need him touching me when he is a fucking liar, sat there and lied in front of my face.

I didn’t want to cry but frustration got to me, it got me because I wanted to hit him for lying “I really wish you just walk away from me, I wish I never had a baby from you, I wish you never messaged me on Facebook, you have heard it all before. You always make me feel like shit, like I can’t do good for you, like I am not good enough and I can. I am not ugly, I have a child but I can always find a guy that will appreciate me but I won’t love him, imagine flirting with another woman when you’re engaged, wow. I mean who am I to speak, you cheated on your wife with me, what makes me think you can’t do that to me” I am saying this all out loud “don’t fucking say that, you knew my predicament” he spoke “but it’s there, if you didn’t so call love me then you would be gone wouldn’t you? You fucking kindly declined, I honestly don’t see how this can work. You don’t see the issue, and you still think you did ok and nothing is wrong. I have people like Kellen tagging me in things about you, proving me he was right. I am being laughed at, here I am chasing you” I laughed “Kellen?” Maurice said “Dakota?” I retorted glaring at him “I don’t know who that is?” how can he be like this “are you purposely being dumb? Like this, you’re on the verge of losing me. Just because you’re sat in this car doesn’t mean I want you” Maurice looked away from me “look, I didn’t want this. I am sorry, I didn’t purposely go out of my way to upset you. That is my nature, I come off as very flirty because that is what I do when I am socialising, nothing I say will make it right so I am quiet. Shit is different to me” he doesn’t know what a relationship is “you only know what you was taught and that was be a lonely whore” he brings out such a bad side out of me, I just want to kill him when he opens his mouth.

Maurice and I have been so silent in this car, it’s just hanging on a balance. What we have is just hanging and it’s again, it’s him again and I try so hard for us to be good. I changed me and he didn’t change shit “I don’t want to lose you Robyn, I don’t want to lose what we have got. I don’t mean to come off as bad, I don’t mean to do anything to upset you because my intentions is you. It’s you who I want, who I love” I heard his words as I daydreamed “then prove it, I let the bitch you fucked every night still work with you. I am constantly giving and you don’t give me anything but hell, and I don’t want materialistic things. I want you to prove it, I want you to want me the way I want you!” I keep shouting, I need to calm down “how do I do that?” I expected that from you “what do you want from me? Tell me what you want from me? Seeing as we are speaking what do you want? Do you want me to be like your mom, take your shit?” Maurice knew what I meant and I think I upset him but am I wrong “honest answer, is that what you want from me? Just take it and you pay for my life?” he shook his head “I want you to be my wife, I want you to actively be there for me and help me” so he doesn’t want me to be like his mom “and if you continue to make me look stupid you think I am staying around? I am not your mom, she is a lovely woman but I can’t be her, she is so sad inside but I don’t think it’s what you want either, is it?” Maurice may know business but relationships is his downfall and his teacher is Marquis.

Something has got to give “so when you say actively be there, do you mean hound you about things, chase you on what you are doing? Is that what it is? I need more clarification on that, I need you to make me understand on what you want from me because I don’t get it, I really don’t. Then I will tell you what I want from you” I want him to speak the fuck up on this “be there for me, at times. I just feel like you are like my mom, in terms of. Wait, hear me out. In terms of just not wanting to care for what I do in the business, if business is my passion and I am being the big boss I feel like you should be there for me, I am a man. And it’s a stupid excuse but when your not around or the woman is not actively there it’s just a free pass to do what you want but I would never go out of my way to cheat, that is not it but I mean like what I did, we being honest then there you go. I feel like you want me to run to you here, then run back. Do this, do that. Jump five times then come to me, like a dog. I do it, I love you I mean why not but it’s like you want that from me when I want you to like, walk into my office and be like Maurice I sorted this out for you and not be like you taken your tablet, you haven’t? Well you’re stupid, like always. Like you’re my assistant, I don’t mean it in a bad way but it’s like fine whatever but I have that busy chip in me, I do it. I jump from one jet to another, I do it for you. You can think whatever of me but I do love you, and my actions seem to come off as being a dickhead, and I do get that way when I drink which I shouldn’t or smoke or whatever to stay alive but I do it anyways, I mean active. I do mean that, and not be like what about me. I mean, what about me Robyn? That has to make that trip, it’s like what six hours. So I came here six hours, six hours back, my day has gone and it’s just put me off balance. I do it, it’s me I don’t care but I do care but I come off as I don’t. I left the jet, that night didn’t sleep. Did my business, went to the club drank and then slept and now this. I am fucked but it’s not about me, I am sorry. I apologised to you and Ally. That is what I mean” he is not wrong actually, I am actually like that with him.

I am glad he spoke, it’s insightful to know and hear what he wants “actively being there means me being close to you, right?” Maurice rubbed his chin “yeah, I got that. I am sorting that out, I just need to go back to New York, work on details on moving to California but right now, I have to finish this divorce and then close this paperwork for the move to take over, I will be on it” nodding my head slowly “how long?” I asked, Maurice blew out air, more of a big sigh “erm, a year. I think maybe two. I have to work out things for my workers, move them here or let them go and pay them out. It’s not easy as it is, just can’t click my fingers. I got to think of people, I could open a new office and keep both but it’s a waste of money and resources when we have overseas to have two in America when it works fine in New York, we have the contact centre there too, I just need to make those decisions based on what is good for the company and for you” I am still annoyed with him, it pains me saying this but I am “don’t you think it would be beneficial for me to move to New York, that way you are always coming home to me. You don’t need to travel, I am always there” Maurice looks shocked “uh, but your job. You have a job here, I don’t expect that and I don’t ask you to do this for me” furrowing my eyebrows “what makes you think I wouldn’t?” that is interesting to hear “because it’s a lot, and it’s me. I always upset you, I made a mess. Moving there, you won’t have your mom or your friends around. It will be me, maybe Nalah sometimes or Shawn. If I upset you then you don’t have that support, like I don’t do it on purpose it’s me, I do it somehow. And your job, I am so proud of what you are and your settled here” he’s not wrong “New York is busy as fuck, it will be easy to get a job there and I think it may be better for our relationship. In a year or two like you said you will be here and there, Reign will be walking, you will be missing things. It will be less strained and I feel like I need to do this because you’re right, and in the bigger picture our daughter will get to see her dad, and her dad can drop her off at school and not some part time thing on if you can make it because we will be closer to you, Malik never saw your dad and you did. And you can tell that hurt him because he wanted him, I want to move to you because it’s less stress on you. I have been thinking on this, because I have been thinking on how I can make us better, so yeah” Maurice grinned at me and the nodded his head “you don’t need to get emotional” he rubbed his eye quickly “I’m not, I am not going to force you to do such a thing but I would love it” he is emotional, I am not going to push him on it.

Maurice asked me to drop him off at the airport, he is going back but he did come. I am still annoyed with him “we both have a lot to think about don’t we? Even with the way I am with you, which I am sorry if it comes off as that, but we have a lot to think about. But you need to realise I am the person you are with, I am the one that you should be looking at in any ways. I can’t stop you from looking but when you are actively doing shit to cause something, then it’s an issue. Things don’t fix over night but we spoke on it and we can work on it, be safe on that flight” Maurice nodded his head “I left my laptop in the SUV so that is why he is following us” I did kind of wonder why it was “don’t forget that now” he is stupid “I wouldn’t ever cheat on you, you got good pussy. The best I’ve ever had” I laughed, I hate him for making me laugh “whatever, your jet is there so I guess you better go. Call me” Maurice nodded his head, he has been shouted at a lot today and I think he has learnt his lesson, I hope anyways “do I not get a hug, anything can happen on there” now he’s said that, turning in my seat a little, Maurice reached over to me as we hugged “I have plenty of more shouting to do at you yet so don’t worry about it, you ain’t going anywhere, I am annoyed with you but safe flight” moving back from the hug “can I call you once we have taken off?” fixing my top “why can’t you call me? I am your fiancé still?” he grinned at me as he got out of the car.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction

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eggphcbe · 5 years

Text

Verses (mobile)

[verses updated: 03/22/2021]

Main Verse: The normal Kindergarten verse. Takes place in Kindergarten 2 on Tuesday, where he tries to convince Teddy to kill Ozzy, but Felix is actually trying to kill his brother instead. This is the main verse, so it is untagged. This also includes “normal” interactions, or any unspecified/crossover verse. Potential canon divergence might occur with some muses, but threads will continue to be untagged.

Pre-Canon verse: Takes place any time before Tuesday, and before all the students from the first game transferred to Felix’s school. Felix will have minimal character development (despite all his character development being reset anyway in the actual game), and he will not know who all of the “new kids” and new faculty members are because he hasn’t met them in this verse yet. This verse makes for a potential canon divergence thread, and threads will then be untagged from that point on.

Tagged with: Verse. || Everything In Order ||

Post-Canon verse: Takes place on or after Wednesday, somehow after the protagonist’s many timeloops. Depending on what happened Tuesday, some characters will be dead, or Felix could have different relationships with other characters. Or nothing could have happened at all. Who knows.

Tagged with: Verse. || Ultimately Open Ended ||

Post ‘Hitman’s Potty Guard’ verse: Unfortunately, Teddy’s plan worked. Ozzy is dead. The hitman succeeded, and consequently threw a wrench into Felix's real plan– To kill his brother. Without Ozzy serving as a distraction, a casualty who wasn’t meant to die in the first place, killing Teddy is going to be so much harder.

Tagged with: Verse. || What A Mess ||

‘Cain’s Not Able’ verse: On the day that Felix plans to bury Teddy alive, trapped in a hole filled with spiders, the plan succeeded. He’s satisfied. Why wouldn’t he be? His useless brother is gone, the hitman was rewarded, and Felix can move on as the sole heir of Applesoft. Of course, there was still the matter of taking that Nugget weirdo to a nugget factory, but that’s nothing money can’t solve, right?

Tagged with: Verse. || The Deed Is Done ||

Alternate ‘Cain’s Not Able’ verse: The mission plays out as it ‘normally’ does, with Felix none the wiser that Teddy actually knows about his plan. As Felix attempts to gloat about how he outsmarted Teddy, his brother pulls a “no u” on him instead. Felix is pushed into the hole by Buggs, and gets beaten up by Nugget for lying about the nugget factory.

On the small chance Felix actually survived all of that, he is pissed at his brother for humiliating him that way.

Tagged with: Verse. || Bait And Switch ||

Healthy Relationship verse: An alternate universe where Ted and Felix have a healthy, normal brotherly relationship with each other. They’re happy together. They love each other. That’s all there is to it.

Tagged with: Verse. || I Promise I’m Trying ||

Roleswap verse: A universe where Ted was chosen to be the future heir and the favourite twin instead of Felix, making Felix the scapegoat instead. From a fanfic I wrote, Bitter Sweet. Felix overworks himself, always trying to win his father's favor but never succeeding. Even as he tries doing everything he can to do things right, the way father wants him to, it seems like it's never enough. He clings to Ted, relying on him to support him despite his intense jealousy towards him, but of course he still loves and appreciates him anyway. He's a lot less confident in himself and even more stressed out in this verse. Nicknamed Arden.

Tagged with: Verse. || The Family Failure ||

Roleswap 2 verse: Another universe where Ted is the favourite twin instead of Felix, but this time, he handles it much worse than canon Felix. Ted in this universe actually treats his brother worse than canon Felix does, which means Felix's only source of support and love is nonexistent. He does as Ted asks out of fear and the desperate need for approval, rather than love and appreciation. His self esteem is even worse in this au, and he's long given up. He sees no value in himself, and has stopped trying to prove himself because he'll clearly never be as good as Ted.

Tagged with: Verse. || The Family Failure 2: Electric Boogaloo ||

Kinderswitch verse: An alternate universe where all the characters swap personalities but their roles in-game stay the same. Felix is still the son of Mr. Huxley, heir to Applesoft, and twin brother to Ted. But he switches personalities with Alice from Kindergarten 2. Based on certain parts of the fandom's interpretation, this AU's Felix is a cloudcuckoolander who speaks in riddles and of bonelessness. He genuinely cares about his brother despite his excessive recreational habits, and is actually not a rat. Nicknamed Fable.

Tagged with: Verse. || Can't Feel My Bones ||

If We Have Each Other: A Kindergarten 2 & Milo Murphy's Law crossover verse with parad0xical-70s-aesthetic, repeatedrepetition, scared-of-spiders2, and livingmetaldetector where Dakota takes in the Kindergarten kids as his own, taking them from really shitty lives and effectively becomes the kids' dad.

Tagged with: Verse. || If We Have Each Other ||

Other verses TBA later.

#verses #links for mobile users #|| Upcoming Developments || Blog updates.

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the--blackdahlia · 5 years

Text

Natural Born Killers Chapter 13 (Sam x Dean)

Title: Natural Born Killers Chapter 13

Summary: It started as an accident. That's what it was. But things escalated from there and now the law wants Dean Winchester, one way or another.

Warnings: Language, violence, death

Present

Victor observed. He watched Sam through the window of the interrogation room, drumming his fingers on the table, bouncing his knee, fidgeting. He almost looked like a normal person, but deep down, Victor knew he wasn’t. He knew he was covering for Dean, and if he had a way to prove it, he would lock them both up so fast. He watched as Sam twisted the black band on his finger

“Where’d you get that?” Victor asked himself. He looked down at the file. Some grainy, black and white surveillance photo of Dean. And there on his left hand was a black band, much like Sam’s. “Sam, Sam, Sam, I think you have some explaining to do.”

****

2006

Dean was released from the hospital and he immediately went with Bobby back to his home. He saw the crushed remains of the Impala sitting in the back, and he made a mental note to fix it. But he had to find Sam. That’s all there was to it. Bobby saw the way his eyes lingered on the car though. He knew how much Dean loved her and took care of her. And seeing her in this shape was just heartbreaking.

“If you feel up to it, you can go ahead and start on fixing her up.” Bobby said. “I’ll make some phone calls. Get my information.” Dean nodded and walked over the the Impala. He ran a hand on the crunched frame and closed his eyes.

“I’m so sorry baby.” Dean whispered. “I’m going to fix this. Promise.”

So he got to work as Bobby paced inside, talking to other hunters for any kind of sign that Sam was out there, alive and well. Dean was working on straightening the frame when Bobby came out. It had been hours and Dean’s body was screaming from all the torment he was putting it through.

“Dean, you should come inside.” Bobby said. “It’s getting late.” Dean closed his eyes and laid the mallet down. Bobby watched him as he walked inside and he saw the way Dean’s shoulder hung in defeat. “I don’t have word on Sam yet, but I have word on something else.”

“What?” Dean asked with a bit of a sigh.

“A hunter friend of mine, a man named Daniel Elkins. He claims to be in possession of a gun. A very special gun.” Bobby told Dean.

“Yeah? So?” Dean asked.

“It’s the Colt.” Bobby said.

“That hunter legend that supposedly can kill demons? Yeah right.” Dean said, going to the fridge for a beer even though the meds he was on would tell him not to.

“It can kill more than just demons Dean.” Bobby told him. “They say it can kill anything. Werewolves, vampires, that Yellow Eyed son of a bitch.”

“So, you’re telling me that this Daniel Elkins guy has a gun that can kill anything? Where is he?” Dean asked.

“Bismarck, North Dakota.” Bobby said. “Last I heard, his cabin was just outside the city. But I haven’t talked to him in awhile. I’m just going off of what Rufus Turner told me.”

“Well, guess I’m headed to North Dakota a long shot.” Dean said. Bobby stopped him.

“I’ll go.” Bobby said. “You stay here and fix the Impala up. We’re going to need a fast car, and my Roadrunner has about had it when it comes to speed.” Dean sighed. He knew that Bobby was trying to distract him. And if something happened, he knew that a hurt Sam would be more comfortable in the Impala then in the Roadrunner or GTO.

“Okay.” Dean said. “I’m gonna get started on her tomorrow. Quite a bit can be salvaged, and what can’t, I think I can find laying around.” Dean was pretty confident in his skills. He knew that he could get Baby up and running in no time. But without knowing what happened to Sam, he wasn’t sure where he was going to look once he did get the Impala fixed.

“Dean? You okay?” Bobby asked. Dean took a deep breath.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Dean said, even though he was stressing out and just wanted to kill something. But not Bobby. Never Bobby.

“You hungry?” Bobby asked.

“Not really.” Dean said. “I’m just going to go to bed I think.” Bobby nodded and watched as Dean ascended up the stairs. He made his way to his own room then to back for his trip to North Dakota.

Dean went to sleep that night with a nightmare of him holding Sam’s limp body.

****

Location Unknown

Sam awoke with a jolt. The rotten smell of sulfur lingered in the air and it was chilly. He sat up on the thin mattress he laid on. It had seen better days, that was for sure. Sam looked around the small room he was in. All that was in it was him and the bed. He wasn’t even sure how he got there. One moment, he was at the hospital, the next, he was waking up there. He looked at the rickety old door and carefully opened it. A long, cold hallway greeted him.

“What the fuck?” Sam whispered. His breath could be seen, and he wasn’t sure if it was from the cold or ghost activity. A woman’s shriek caught his attention then and he raced down the hallway to where a woman was being backed into a corner by a man in a black and white striped prison uniform. Sam looked over at a room that he realized was a cell. He pulled a loose bar off of it, prayed it was iron, and swung. The man disappeared.

“What the hell was that?” The girl asked. “Who the hell are you?”

“Sam.” He said. “And that was a ghost.”

“Lily.” She said. “And ghosts are real?”

“It’s a brave new world.” Sam sighed. “What are you doing here? What am I doing here?”

“I don’t know.” Lily said. “I don’t even know where here is.”

“It’s obviously a prison.” Sam said, looking around. He looked down at the bar in his hand. “I’m just not sure what prison it is. Or why we’re here.”

“Maybe it’s the man with the yellow eyes.” Lily said. “He came to me at the funeral. Told me he could help me.” She looked down at her gloved hands, tears welling up in her eyes.

“Lily? What happened?” Sam asked. Lily didn’t get to answer before a man with shaggy hair was running towards them.

“Holy shit!” He said, sliding to a stop. “There’s more people!”

“Hi?” Lily said, giving him a look.

“I’m Sam.” Sam said, sizing up the other guy.

“I’m Andy.” He said. “Where are we?”

“Welcome to the club of I have no fucking clue.” Lily said. “So is it just us three?”

“Not quite.” Another man said. Sam, Lily, and Andy looked to see two more people walking to them, the man who had spoken and another woman. “I’m Private Jake Talley. US Army.”

“Ava.” The other girl said, waving. “Secretary.” She laughed a little. Sam could tell that she was scared and nervous.

“Andy.” Andy told them.

“I’m Lily.” Lily said, shivering some from the cold.

“Sam.” Sam offered his hand to Jake, who shook it.

“Where is this place?” Ava asked, looking around. “It’s so, gross.” A mouse scampered by then and she squeaked. Sam walked over to a wall where an old, rusted plaque was. He wiped some dirt off of it.

“Tennessee State Prison.” Sam said.

“Prison?” Lily asked. “You’re kidding.”

“Explains the ghost.” Sam said.

“Ghosts aren’t real.” Ava said.

“I don’t know. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen some ghosts.” Andy said. Ava gave him a disgusted look.

“Were you high when these ghosts came to visit?” She asked. Andy was about to defend himself, but instead rolled his eyes.

“Okay, what’s the last thing everyone remembers?” Sam asked. “I was at the hospital with my husband after a car accident.”

“My third bong load.” Andy told them.

“Picking out wedding invitations with my fiance.” Ava added.

“Afghanistan.” Jake said, back straight.

“My girlfriend’s funeral.” Lily whispered. Sam nodded.

“There’s got to be some kind of connect. Are you guys all twenty-two?” Sam asked. They all nodded and it started to click in Sam’s head. “Are...are you guys psychic?”

“What? No.” Ava said. “I just have these dreams and…”

“Sometimes they come true?” Sam asked. Ava nodded.

“How did you know that?” She asked.

“Because I’m the same way, except my dreams don’t always happen when I’m asleep.” Sam told her.

“Well, I can get people to do things. Put images in their head.” Andy explained. “I didn’t mean to though. It was totally by accident. My twin, he did the same thing. But he was shot and killed.” Jake walked over to a heavy piece of the roof that had caved in. He picked it up one handed.

“Sometimes I can get people to do things too. But it’s usually when my adrenaline is high. Like the time that my buddy was trapped under a his Humvee. I told him to be calm and he did.” Jake explained. Sam looked over at Lily, who was quiet.

“Guess I’m like Rogue to this team of X-Men.” She said. “I touch things, and I can kill them.” She closed her eyes. “I killed my girlfriend on accident. I wasn’t expecting it to happen.”

“Okay, so we’re all 22. We all have these, whatever they are,” Ava began. “But that doesn’t explain why we’re in an abandoned prison.”

“I brought you here.” A voice rang out. The five looked up at a catwalk that was in front of the upper level cells. A man stood there, smiling down at them, his yellow eyes almost glowing in the dark.

“You.” They all five said. Ava stared up at him.

“Where’s my fiance?” She asked. Azazel laughed.

“You wanted ease of stress from the wedding. So I helped with that.” His laugh was dark and sent a deeper chill into them. “There is no wedding anymore. Your fiance is dead.”

“WHAT?!” Ava cried out. “That’s not what you promised!”

“You can’t have stress for a wedding if there is no wedding.” Azazel pointed out. Ava buried her head in Sam’s chest and cried. “Let’s see. Lily. I found you crying at that funeral. I told you that I could take your pain away.”

“Did...did you bring Vanessa back?” She asked. He shook his head.

“No. I’m not that generous. But I did erase you from all of her family's memories. You’ll never have to deal with the pain of them accusing you of murdering their daughter.”

“But her family loved me!” Lily screamed. Azazel just smirked.

“Andy, Andy, Andy.” Azazel said, staring at him. “You probably don’t really remember our meeting. You and your friends were a little too wasted it seems. But, you wanted to live wild and free. And you are. In fact, the lease at your apartment has been null and void. Your van has been repossessed. You have nothing tying you down!”

“You bastard!” Andy growled. “That’s my home!”

“Not anymore. I think a cute family with a baby has taken it over.” Azazel turned his gaze onto Jake. “You just wanted to go home. That’s what you told me, right?”

“What did you do?” Jake asked.

“Well, nothing much. Except your AWOL now and if you are ever caught, a court martial and jail time are in your future.” Azazel explained with a smirk.

“That’s not what I meant!” Jake said. “I love my job. I just missed my mama.”

“Oh. Guess you should’ve been a little more specific then.” He finally turned his gaze to Sam. “And Sam Winchester. Boy, I have been waiting a long, long time to finally meet you.”

“You killed Dean, didn’t you?” Sam asked.

“No. I didn’t. But the punchline of this joke is, he wasn’t going to die anyway.” Azazel laughed. “In fact, he was fine, just knocked out a little bit and needed some rest.” He paced on the catwalk. “I hope you enjoy your time here. If you try to escape, I can’t guarantee your safety. You do have some friends in the walls. They’ll keep you company.” He stopped and stared at them. “I’ll be back for you five later!”

With that, he was gone. They looked around, but didn’t see him. Ava’s tears had slowed as she let go of Sam.

“What the fuck are we supposed to do now?” Jake asked. “We can’t stay here. We’re not prisoners!”

“What have we gotten ourselves into?” Andy asked, sitting on a pile of rubble, looking defeated.

“I’m not staying here.” Lily said. “I don’t care what that fucker says. I’m getting out.” With that, she ran for the door.

“Lily no!” Sam yelled. He went to stop her as she opened the heavy prison door. She stepped outside and turned to look at them.

“See. It’s not bad.” She told them. That’s when something grabbed her from behind, twisting her head and making her fall to the ground. A woman with long, dark hair stood over her. She mumbled something in Latin and a blue light came out of Lily’s open mouth, pouring itself into a small vial. She turned to look at them and smiled.

“Hi Sammy. I missed you.” She said, her eyes black. “And man, is my dad going to be happy at what I got.” She waved at him before she disappeared, leaving Lily’s dead body laying on the cold, Tennessee ground.

Forever Tags: @anathewierdo @we-ride-with-the-tide @dekahg @marvel-af @nanie5 @imboredsueme @gemini0410 @aiaranradnay @babypink224221 @mogaruke @xxwarhawk @strab0 @sandlee44 @screechingartisancashbailiff

Supernatural Tags: @mrsdeanfuckingwinchester @bandobsession98 @fangirlsencyclopaediaofweirdness @ilovetardis @missihart23 @cloudyskylines @supernaturalwincestsblog @flamencodiva @sams-serialkiller-fetish @theas-bedtime-stories

Natural Born Killers Tags: @mysteriousharmony @webcraft4eveh @mereka18 @writinginthesecrettrees

#natural born killers #sam winchester #dean winchester #supernatural #wincest #sam x dean #sam winchester x dean winchester #fanfiction #jensen ackles #jared padalecki

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heloflor · 3 years

Text

Alone on Valentines bonus ending

AO3 link

Note : Basically I wrote another part to this oneshot but it didn’t really flow well with the rest; and I already had a satisfying ending anyways. But still, since I don’t like ideas to go to waste, here’s a “““non canon””” dialogue, if I may call it like that. Basically, if you imagine that all my fics about the rogue arc can be in the same timeline, this dialogue didn’t happen.

Enjoy !

Doctor D. had gone to have dinner with the Murphys, while Vinnie had chosen to stay behind. It had been a few hours since he received the gifts that still refused to get out of his mind. He just couldn’t stop thinking about it, about Balthazar. He wondered about his motivations. But most importantly, he couldn’t understand why the man would put so much effort into his gifts and yet refuse to face him.

Vinnie had been fidgeting with his phone for a while now, having the same questions going through his head over and over again.

Should I call him ? Should I ask him for an explanation ? Is it even worth trying at this point ? Surely he’s at some resting place by now, so would it be right to call him ? He put the effort to give gifts, why wouldn’t he try calling ?

Vinnie groaned, putting a hand to his face. He couldn’t just spend the entire evening like this. He had to do something.

He had to call him.

Knowing he wouldn’t be able to do anything before it, and after noticing how much time he already wasted considering it, Vinnie hesitantly went to his contacts, selecting ‘honey’ and giving it a try.

Vinnie tried not to cringe as he heard the familiar ringing sound that meant Balth’s phone was turned on and ringing. Usually, that was all Vinnie heard, until the answering machine started.

But this time, something different happened.

After two rings, the phone went silent.

There was no robotic voice telling him nobody was on the line, no beep to encourage him to leave a voicemail.

There was only silence. Which meant only one thing.

Balthazar answered the call.

“Cavendish ?”, Vinnie immediately said, his pulse getting faster. This might be his only chance ! “Cavendish, are you here ?”

There was nothing but silence on the other line.

“Cavendish, please answer me. I know you can hear me. I’ve-I-I’ve done it a thousand times before, I know you’re on the other side…Please…please answer me.”

…

The silence from the other side slowly got replaced by the sound of breathing that made Vinnie’s heart jump out of his chest. He was there. He was really there !, the thought kept repeating in his mind, like a mantra that kept getting him more excited as it grew louder.

“Cavendish ? Ca-Balthazar ? Come on, say something !”

…

Vinnie had to prevent himself from sighing. He could easily picture Balthazar. The man was probably sitting, a hand on his mouth, trying to make as little noise as possible, unable to find in himself to talk. Well, if he didn’t want to talk…

“I…I got your gifts. You shouldn’t have, you know.”, the short man let out a sad chuckle. “No really, you shouldn’t have. It makes my text gift look insignificant.”

The breathing on the end of the line became louder and faster. Balth was dying to talk, or he was trying not to cry from guilt. Vinnie couldn’t tell. He didn’t know which one he preferred.

“I was especially surprised by the flowers.”, Vinnie kept talking like it was any other voicemail. He hated it. “I didn’t expect you to put so much effort into trying to tell me something. You know, with how you’ve been avoiding telling me anything for the last three weeks.”, he hoped Balthazar could feel his frustration. “I was starting to think you forgot about me.”, a lie. “But after seeing those, I guess you really do want us to stay together.”

…

“The chocolates were pretty nice too. I wonder how many of those animals you knew by name. You probably got some weird looks from the shopkeepers.”, he tried to joke.

…

“Listen Balth,”, he sighed. “you’re making it real hard for me here. If you don’t have anything to tell me, then I’m done.”, he couldn’t believe he was saying that, but he was really starting to get angry here. Besides, what other choice did he have ? “Goodbye Balthazar !”

“Wait don’t -!”

Vinnie froze.

“…don’t…don’t hang up yet.

…

…Dakota ?...Vinnie ?”

“I’m still here.”, Vinnie could almost cry. It had been so long since he’d heard that familiar voice ! “Where are you ? W-why did you leave.”

“…”

“Balth ?”

“I’m sorry…”

“Balth. Just-just tell me. Where are you ?”

“I can’t.”

“Why ? What happened ?”

“I…I’m sorry, I can’t tell you anything.”

“Balth-”

“I don’t want you to be put at risk.”

“And you think I want you to be ?”

“I’m alright. I know what I’m doing.”, Vinnie heard the other man take a deep breath. “I’ll be back soon enough, I promise. Just- stay in Danville, look after yourself. And please don’t do anything stupid.”

“I wouldn’t do anything stupid if you told me where you were. Or what I did wrong to make you leave.”

“…You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Then why ?! I know you messed with my memory ! What happened ?”

“…”

“Balthazar !”

“I assure you I will tell you everything once I’m done.”

“Why not now ?!”, Vinnie was getting more and more frustrated. Balthazar better have a really good explanation for this !

“…

…

…I should go back to my translations…”

“What ?!”

nonononononononon

“I have to go.”

“You’re not serious ?!”

“I’ll be back home as soon as possible.”

“Balthazar !”, Vinnie was starting to panic. Balth couldn’t hang up ! Not now !

“Goodbye, dear.”

“Balthazar you can’t do that to me !”

“…”, a sob. “…I knew answering you was a foolish idea…”

“Balthazar.”

“…Goodbye…I love you.”

“Balth don’t -!”

Beep

Vinnie frantically called back, waiting anxiously at each ring.

Balthazar didn’t pick up this time.

He called a second time, then a third, then a fourth time.

Still no answer.

By the sixth time, Vinnie couldn’t handle it anymore. He threw his phone across the room, feeling past the point of caring about its state.

Vinnie put his hands on his face, his glasses slipping to his forehead.

He couldn’t believe what just happened.

After three weeks of nothing, Balthazar finally gave him a sign, finally talked to him. And yet, Vinnie found himself as lost and confused as the first day.

Balthazar was somewhere outside Danville, doing something he refused to talk about.

Balthazar didn’t want Vinnie to find him.

Vinnie would chuckle at the thought had his situation been less painful. Balth was an idiot if he really believed his husband would ever stop looking for him.

The short man glanced at the invention Doctor D. had almost finished. A new spark of hope rising within him through the desperation.

It didn’t matter that Balthazar refused to be found. It didn’t matter that the taller man believed he would be back soon. If Balth thought Vinnie would be in danger where he is, then he wasn’t safe either.

Vinnie would do anything to find his partner as soon as possible, while he’s still alive and well.

I’ll find my way back to you, hon.

Whether you want me to or not.

#Milo Murphy's Law #Dakavendish #Vinnie Dakota #Balthazar Cavendish #mml season 2 spoilers #hey look #there's more #this time it's shorter #with almost exclusively dialogues #my fanfics

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heavens-crown · 5 years

Text

You’re Mine

Synopsis: You met Dean and Sam when they were hunting a vampire two years ago. When it was realized you had no one else Dean and Sam offered to take you to their friend in South Dakota, but after a lot of persuading and puppy eyes they caved and allowed you to join them on future hunts. Now Deans a demon, you can’t find him anywhere, and you really want to punch Crowley in his stupid face.

Words: 1882

Warning: Cursing, reference to sexual encounter, minor NSFW, minor violence

A/N: This isn’t my first fan-fiction I’ve ever written but it is however my first supernatural one. Enjoy!

Time slowed to a crawl as you looked up from your laptop. Sam was carrying in Dean, but something was wrong. Dean covered in blood, tears rolling down Sam’s face, it could only mean one thing.

“No.” You whispered. Shaking your head, you numbly got to your feet and slowly trailed after Sam who was headed to Deans room, the same room you would watch Game of Thrones in, the same room Dean would let you lay down with him after a nightmare. Standing in the doorway you stared in disbelief at what was in front of you.

“Y/N, you shouldn’t be here. Go in the library and wait for me.” Sam said, his voice breaking. Scrubbing a hand down his face Sam finally turned to face you. “He’s dead Y/N. But I’m going to bring him back. I swear it.”

That had been two months ago. Now you and Sam were tracking dean through the US trying to find a way to bring him home. The first two weeks were the hardest when you and Sam realized he was gone. Everything tasted like saw dust, the nightmares came back full strength, you had more panic attacks. Sam had been there for you, never wavering, always reassuring you day after day, ‘I’ll bring him back. I swear it.’

“I’m gonna head down to the bar Sam. I need a drink, and maybe some locals will have seen something.” You pronounced as you stood from your seat in the motel. Sam looked up, the same sadness in his expression that had been there the past few months. He was worried about you, as was Cas who claimed that even in your haggard state you were still pretty.

“You sure Y/N? I know you can handle yourself but that doesn’t change the fact that Dean’s a demon now and we need to be careful if we encounter him.” Sam said gently. Throwing Sam, a large smile you walked over and gave him a hug, mindful of his sprained elbow.

“I’ll be fine Sammy, I just need a drink. Besides I have the cuffs on me and my angel blade. If anything goes down I’ll holler.” With reluctance stamped all over his face Sam nodded and handed you the keys to the car.

Sliding into the front seat you took a deep breath and wrinkled your nose a bit. Fake leather, old fast food, and socks it smelled nothing like the Impala did. Soft leather, old spice, and something else you could never pin point. You loved that car, almost as much as you loved its primary owner. Thinking about the car sent you down the memory lane.

“You take that back you angry little midget!” Exclaimed dean with a laugh. Laughing just as hard you shook your head.

“Hell no, you know I’m right! Cake is way better than pie.” You laughed. Trying to suppress his laughter Dean tried to give you a stern look, but he failed as a smile broke across his face. It was around midnight; the road was empty and Sam was stretched across the back-seat sound asleep. The second trial had taken toll on the hunter and he was always exhausted.

“Take it back Y/N or else.” Dean teased with a laugh. You were still laughing but something in you stood to attention at the dark note underneath his teasing. Smirking you turned to fully face the older hunter, prodding him with your toe.

“Or else what?” You asked with false innocence. Stopping at the red light the look he gave you a look that sent shivers down your spine and made your stomach clench in arousal.

“Or else I’ll spank that pretty little ass of yours.”

Sighing into your drink you smiled at the bartender again. He was nice enough, pretty cute, but nothing compared to Dean. Your thoughts were always on him these days. The days you spent together, how he trained you, nights you shared a bed, it was always something concerning him. When you found out he was still alive it felt like you could breathe again. Then when Sam told you that he was now a demon it felt like ice had been poured on you.

“You ok miss?” The bartender asked softly. There were two other patrons in the small place and neither paid you two any attention. Smiling at him you nodded.

“Yes, I’m fine, just travelling down memory lane ya know?” Smiling at you he nodded and then braced himself on the bar.

“I get that. Most people come here to do that. I’m Ben by the way.” He reached out his hand to you, and you took it giving it a soft shake. His hands were rough and calloused, and they seemed to swallow your hand whole.

“Y/N.” You reply softly. Letting go of his hand you curl it around your glass of whiskey and glance around. “Do you own this place or just work here Ben?” Seeming pleased you asked he grins.

“Own it actually. My Great-Grandpa opened it back in 1920. My family has ran it ever since. What about you? What do you do for work?” He asks. Locking eyes with him you pause briefly. There wasn’t anything but pure curiosity in his eyes.

“I’m a travelling photographer. I do some commission work but I do mostly landscapes and nature shots. I’m working on putting together a portfolio.” You answer softly. It wasn’t a lie either. Before Dean and Sam you were a photographer who focused mostly on nature. You had pieces in magazines, galleries, hell even celebrities sometimes hired you. But then a run in with a vampire and the Winchester brothers threw that out the window.

“That sounds nice.” Ben replied. The chiming of the door opening had him glancing up to whoever had just walked in the door. “What can I get you sir?”

“Whiskey.” My body froze and every nerve ending came to life. I knew that voice, and I hadn’t heard it in two months. The voice that would calm me from nightmares, bring me back from panic attacks, and brought everything female in me to attention. It took everything in me not to turn around and launch myself at him.

“You got it boss.” Ben turned and made Dean his glass of whiskey setting it on the bar. I could see Deans hand, god I missed those hands, reach down and pick up the glass. One of the other patrons called out for Ben so with a smile to us he turned and headed to the other end of the bar. My heart was beating out of my chest now. He was sat so close to me his thigh pressed against mine, its warmth reaching my leg even through my jeans.

“So. How’s my pretty little girl doing? Miss me?” Dean asked with a smirk. I turned to look at him and I locked eyes with him. Fuck I missed him.

“Hello Dean.” Was my simple reply. His smirk turned into a grin as he looked me up and down. Green eyes lingered on the low cut of my top and narrowed.

“Were you wearing that hoping you would get some cock in you? And here I thought I was the only one that was ever going to fuck you.” Dean hummed out. Eyes narrowing, I ground my teeth so hard my jaw hurt. Dean had been the only one to ever fuck me, and if I got my way it would stay like that. But I forced those words down and fought to keep my expression neutral.

“You have been the only one to fuck me, until you ran off with your bestie Crowley. Besides the bartender Ben is kind of cute, maybe he’ll be willing to get in the sheets with me.” You answered with a smile. Deans eyes narrowed and the smirk wiped off his face. Taking a swig from his whiskey he set it down only to lean toward you.

“Listen little girl. I’m not here to watch you banter with the bartender or anyone else. I am here to take back what’s mine.” Dean said softly. Eyes still locked onto mine I swallowed the lump in my throat and kept his stare.

“Oh, and what is it that apparently belongs to you?” You ask. The grin is back and he leans a bit closer.

“That’s you little girl. And before tonight is over I’m gonna fuck you within an inch of your life.” Dean growled. Just like that I felt my stomach clench and I could feel my pussy start to dampen. Shit I missed him.

“Not a chance asshole.” You hiss back. With a smirk he leans back, drinks the last of his whiskey and throws a fifty on the table. Before you can do anything else he was stood up and snagging your wrist to pull you to your feet.

“Dean!” Shushing you he pulled you out of the bar and toward the impala. Stumbling after him, you tried to get your mind in order. Several thoughts went through your head. Turning to you Dean smirked and then pushed you against the Impalas door. Before you could do anything, he slammed his lips against yours pulling a moan from your throat. Fuck you missed him. Gripping his shirt, you deepened the kiss, practically melting at his soft growl.

“I missed you little one.” Dean murmured against your ear before he nipped your ear. Humming softly, you pulled one hand from him to move it to your jacket. Feeling the movement, he grinned against your neck. “My pretty girl getting undressed for me?”

“Not exactly.” Before he could process the words, you slammed your knee into his stomach. Shoving him off and around you pulled out the demon hand cuffs and latched one to one of his wrists. Snarling he went to grab you. Ducking under his arm you yanked the cuff to his free hand and successfully latched it. Once it was latch you kicked him in the knee making his legs buckle, forcing him to one knee. “I’m sorry Dean.”

“Crazy little minx.” He grumbled. He glared up at you and you could see the frustration in his gaze. “Get the hand cuffs off of me little one. Come on.” Ignoring him you focused on getting the keys to the impala and opening it. Helping Dean up and into the back of the car you hopped into the front seat. Starting the car, you began to pull from the parking lot before giving Sam a call.

“Sam, I got him. Meet me at the bunker.”

#supernatural #dean winchester #m/f #one shot #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester x reader #fanfiction

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the-canary · 6 years

Text

Languages of Saints - C.R (3/10).

Summary: A deal isn’t supposed to involve feelings, right? (Reader/Carter Baizen).

Prompt: “Did you enjoy yourself last night?”

Masterlist

A/N: welcome to the longest chapter so far, even with some changes i do plan on moving forward with the story.

Part 1 | Part 2

Feedback is always appreciated.

Monday.

It’s a surprise to your supervisor, Harold, early Monday morning when you sent him a quick text that you will not be coming to work that day due to being sick. It’s not that you don’t have the compt time for it, you have way too much actually, but it still makes him question your actions a little, not that he would say that outloud, especially with Marcy nearby. God knew that woman was ready to flick a sexual harassment filing to HR at a moment’s notice, it was just the age he lived in he guessed. However, that and the usual coffee break gossip leave his head when a man in a blue tailored suite walks into the floor that houses all the accountants and analysts’ offices. He wears confidence in an annoying sort of way, as he calls on everyone to meet him up front with a pair of lawyers behind him.

“My name is Carter Baizen,” the younger man declares grinning at the sound of his own name,”As of last Friday, Wyman Co. is under my direct management.”

The small crowd murmurs amongst themselves, as Carter’s smirk turns devilish. This was his favorite part of the act, reminding others that their livelihoods where in his hands. He might be considered a Saint to some, but to others he was the goddamn devil. It might have not been the best thing, the morally right thing to do but Carter Baizen was here to remind everyone (and himself at times) that he was worth something -- even at the cost of others. However, through all the dramatics, there was something that he needed to know more than anything else -- where his goddamn money was.

“However, it seems that there is some money missing from the annual report and statistics I was given” Carter keeps going on with his act, as he shakes the packet of papers the black-suited man gives him, “I hear you are the best group of accountants and analysts this side of Wall Street.”

Everyone stays silent as he gives the punchline of his speech, “You have until Friday to find me the missing 2 million dollars, if not this whole department is fired.”

Carter gives the appalled crowd a shiteating grin before leaving, but instead of freaking out like most other groups would - the financial team of what was formerly Wyman Co. huddle up and look at Harold. He drags a hand through his thinning hair before looking at the chubby-cheeked, brown-eyed Marcy.

“Send her a detailed email of everything that just happened,” Marcy nods before running to her cubicle, “I want you guys searching, for any inconsistencies and you send it to either her or Nick -- they’re gonna be our A-team on this. Understood?”

“Understood!”

If only you, fighting with Monsieur over the blanket, knew what you were in for.

Tuesday.

Rocio’s mother sends you an urgent email on Monday evening asking where her daughter has been since Friday and in all honesty you can’t answer because she hasn’t answered your messages and her Instagram has been oddly cryptic --with dark and blurry shots-- since you left the party. It’s around that time you see the email from Marcy, with her panicked voice ringing in your head-- about what had happened at work, and it doesn’t really surprise you -- the company had been tanking for awhile now, but the thing about Mr. Baizen -- that’s what gets you up with a headache and your best set of footwear.

“How are you even awake?” Nick asks, as you wait for the elevator to reach your level. The dark-haired man shakes his head, as you motion towards the cup of coffee in your hand.

“It’s just like college, pills and coffee,” you state, voice still raspy from your sickness and the lack of sleep the email had given you. Honestly, it felt like that time Rocio made you go to a frat party the night before your last statistics finale. You shrug, as Nick gives you those eyebrows of disapproval though you knew he understood from his own sleepless night as a new dad.

“Let’s do this, Nicholas,” you chug your coffee, knowing that the burnt kind is already being made in the break room.

“Right behind you,” he remarks, as you frown for only a moment.

“Please stop,” you laugh, ignoring the tightness in the back of your neck that you always get when someone is watching you, “I don’t want Matt after me again.”

Nick laughs, as the two of you head to your offices and begin going into the pile of documents that the rest of the floor has assailed your dropbox with, completely unaware of a certain man watching the proceedings, though you are aware the office watching you through the glass walls, making it obvious that their hopes are leaning all on you.

Wednesday Night.

It’s in the minor details, that’s something you learned early on in this job. You have to be meticulous, if not money could slip out of your hands, and that’s something that rich people hated the most -- losing money that they didn’t spent themselves. But, between hour 5 and hour 12 you get somewhere with a little thing Nick says that makes Marcy laugh during breaktime. It’s the little things that accumulate -- that stupid saying doesn’t leave your head, so you start looking into the little things, a monthly payment here or a downpayment there. It’s all in the same area, though never under the same name.

“The last CEO bought out his lover with gifts,” you explain to Nick and Harold in the mid afternoon meeting the three of you are having, though that isn’t the half of it. You wouldn’t let them know, if it could possibly spill out and cause a bigger mess -- people still lost their jobs, with this the old boss just looked bad.

“Every dollar accounted for?” Harold ask, as you nod. Nick is going over the numbers once more, because he secretly knows that you’re not that good at math, never been one for a calculated risk.

“So, you agree to present this to Mr. Baizen tomorrow?” Harold asks, bright eyes and grabby hands. You roll back your shoulders and give him a tight smile.

Calculated risks have never been your go to, but look at you now.

Thursday Night.

Harold sends the report bright and early the next morning, so that Mr. Baizen’s attorneys and whoever else had time to look over it. You just tried to stay alive for the rest of the day. You know what ignoring your illness wasn’t the best thing for you, but your work and livelihood were on the line -- one that you loved dearly. The healthcare benefits could pay if you got sick and maybe if you died, and while that was a little morbid, it was how you felt by the end of day. You hoped you died before you meet said Carter Baizen. However, Lady Luck was not on your side when 4pm rolled around and you were standing in front of his office door at the top of the highrise that housed the company.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Baizen,” you say, holding some folders and in your best business outfit, trying not to lose your voice. The man turns to you and for a moment you’re in shock -- the guy from the party. You want to say something, but you are going to be a professional. You are going to fight for your job, though you can’t help but frown at the crooked grin he gives you while stating your last name.

“So let’s talk,” Carter declares, as he takes a seat and you follow him. On top of his desk are several folders, the whole meeting of the company’s missing money takes nearly 40-45 minutes and you’re surprised he’s paying attention and taking notes, like he cares about the company. However, what catches his attention, ignoring the whole mistress of the former CEO is the markings on your paper from the last few months that aren’t in his report. You’re about to go into that when he finally speaks up.

“I think you should stop talking,” Carter states coldly, as you look at him from across the wooden table. You look at him and back at the paper, hating that you put two and two together so quickly. Carter Baizen had owned Wyman a lot longer than just last week, it was just that the old CEO couldn’t handle what the dark-haired man in front was doing anymore, so he finally bought the old fool out.

It was one of the oldest tricks in the game.

“You swindle funds into other things, don’t you? Scarier things ,” he doesn’t say anything about your accusation, but the dark look in his blues eyes is telling you to shut up, not that you were ever any good at that either, “And you use your accountant as scapegoats, is that why you fire the whole department when you come in? Every time?”

“Usually,” he remarks while smiling like the cat caught the canary., as you tighten your hands into fists at his carelessness for others, “I could still do it, but you already know.”

“Please don’t fire the department,” you plea angrily, as you slam your hands onto his desk though it doesn’t seems to phase, “You saw how good they are this week. Anything, I’ll even be your fucking scapegoat. But, there are good people out there.”

“ Anything ?” he cocks an eyebrow, as you scowl. Rich people were truly disgusting.

“I mean, not anything . I’m not looking for 50 shades of Gray here, Mr. Baizen,” you try to save yourself by being polite in the end, but his shaking head just shows that he caught the underlying disgust in your voice. However, he chooses to ignore it.

“Well, you’re not Dakota Johnson,” he states and for a moment you want to laugh at his weak rebuttal.

“I don’t think brunettes are your type, if I recall correctly,“ you answer back as he glares at you, but all you do is shrug -- I mean who doesn’t read a tell-all when it had a the juiciest gossip about NYC, at least that’s how you remember it being promoted. Rocio is the one that really told you everything, she was a talkative drunk, after all.

“Well then, I’ll keep up my end of this bargain,” Carter concedes, almost too quickly, “And you keep yours.”

“Understood, Mr. Baizen,” is all you say before trying around and that’s when everything starts to get dizzy once more, as your fever sneaks up to you with the fear you have been ignoring as well. Carter Baizen could be one scary person if he wanted to be , are your last thoughts as you let out half a curse before blacking out completely. You never hear the rushing footsteps coming towards you.

Friday Morning.

You wake up in your apartment mid afternoon with Monsieur meowing at your side. You feel awful with your throat clogged up and your eyes barely able to open. It was like you crashed into a monster truck only to get thrown into a brick wall. However, by muscle memory, the first thing you do is check your phone -- a little scared of wondering how you exactly you got here since the last thing you remember is talking to one Carter Baizen, who might be the one that had messaged you a couple of hours ago.

To show you that I am a nice guy, take all of next week off. You look awful, Stats. But, the following Monday starts your new workload -- CB.

“Oh, Mon. What did I get myself into?” you groan before throwing your phone into the abyss that was your room as Monsieur keeps meowing for your attention.

Part 4

#baezens4k #carter baizen #carter baizen x reader #carter x reader #carter baizen fanfic #carter baizen fanfiction #gossip girl #gossip girl fanfic #gossip girl fanfiction #series: of saints #fabiola trying to write

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mackad00-blog · 6 years

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Chapter 5: she’s gone

Kenny wasn't answering her phone and Shane was starting to get nervous. She was usually good at texting back as soon as she saw it. She had never ignored him before. Had he done something wrong? He thought their relationship was good!

It was 7:30 and he was still sitting outside her house in his car, waiting to take her to school. Something wasn't right, he thought stepping out of the car and making his way to the front door. Her car wasn't in the driveway but she would have definitely texted or called him if she didn't want a ride.

Shane dug the spare key from the potted plant next to the front door and let himself in.

"Kendra?" He called, darting up the stairs, "baby, wake up! We're going to be late to school..." he stopped outside her door and took a breath. Waking her up was his favorite. She was always so adorable in the morning.

He gently opened the door and let his eyes roam over her tiny bedroom. The walls were baby blue and there were words written in sharpie all over the walls. He smiled at all her flowers and cacti she had by her window and the glow in the dark stars stuck up on the ceiling.

When he finally got to the bed he froze. He saw a neatly folded note and got excited. Was this a scavenger hunt? Oh shoot! Was it the anniversary of something?

He bounded over to the bed and snatched it up, a large playful smile spread over his whole face. That smile slowly started to slip as he read on.

Dear Shane,

I'm so sorry. I know you love me and you really wanted this to work but I just can't. I've got this hole in my sole and there's nothing here that can fill it. I've been feeling this way for a while now. I don't belong here. I don't feel like im alive. I just need to leave. I can't stay here. I can't be who you need me to be and I am so terribly sorry for that. You don't deserve this. You're lovely and patient and perfect, and you deserve so much more than me. I can't breathe here. I'm so sorry. I have to leave. I can't even see the stars in this goddamn city. I don't know where I'm going or when or if I'll be back. But I know that you'll be fine without me. I'm just a ghost after all.

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion and his heart dropped to his stomach. This couldn't be real, right? If she were really that unhappy he would have noticed. What was he supposed to do now?

Shane carefully refolded the note and put it in his pocket. He felt completely drained and heartbroken. There was no way he could make it through a whole school day so he buried himself in her pillows and let himself fall apart, surrounded by her smell and the fresh painful memories tacked to her walls.

He didn't let himself cry. But that doesn't mean it didn't hurt. For some reason he felt crushing guilt and regret in his chest. He couldn't move. He could only lay there, still on her bed hugging her pillows, staring blankly at the walls and miss her.

*******

She was actually gone. That was all Dakota could think as he stayed frozen by the doorway, still in the clothes he wore before, listening to his father smash everything in uncontrollable grief.

This wasn't supposed to happen. She promised she was going to get better. She promised she wouldn't leave him alone with that horrible man but she's gone now.

She didn't get better like the doctors said she would. It was some kind of accident in surgery. Dakota wished he listened to the explanation the doctor gave but if he was being honest he stopped listening after the first two sentences.

If only he went straight to the hospital right after school instead of stopping for hot chocolate...he would've gotten to see her one more time. Maybe if he were there things would've changed.

Him and his father had always had a rocky relationship and his mother was always the mediator. How would they survive without her?

"Dad?" Dakota's voice was weak as he made his way to the kitchen. His father was on the floor crying, staring at all the broken dishes that he ruined in his rage. He was cradling his wife's favorite plate to his chest.

It was blue with sunflower painted all over it. Dakota remembered when she brought it home from a yard sale. She had been so excited about it, her smile was so wide and her eyes were sparkling with delight. She had always been obsessed with sunflowers so she said it was some kind of sign that things were looking up.

"Dad..." Dakota said gently, making his way over to crouch in front of the older man. All he wanted to do was offer comfort.

"It's not real. None of this can be real." His father blubbered. Dakota choked on the lump in his throat.

"She's gone, Dad." Dakota whimpered, trying to move closer but his father lashed out, smacking his son hard in the face with the plate. Dakota fell back, hands going straight to his jaw as he looked back up in disbelief.

"Shut your mouth! You don't know anything! You're wrong!" He shot to his feet and stood over his son, trying to intimidate him.

"Dad!" Dakota was getting angry. His dad had never hit him before. He got to his feet and shoved the older man, "snap out of it! This isn't what she would have wanted!" He yelled.

"Don't tell me what she would have wanted, " his dad screamed back as he swung again, this time with his fist, "She was my wife! I knew her better! You don't know anything" He sounded hysterical. Dakota held his cheek as angry tears stung his eyes. "Don't you dare cry!" The man spat, pushing Dakota back roughly to where he almost lost his balance, "You didn't love her. You weren't even there. You don't get to cry!"

He knew it was just the grief talking, but each word felt like a dagger to his chest. His father went to hit him again but Dakota grabbed his arm before he could.

"Stop! That's enough! You're hurting me." Dakota screamed in his face. His father paused but he didn't look sorry.

"You think I care?" He sneered, yanking himself from his grip. Dakota looked up at him with hurt and desperation on his face. He squeezed his eyes shut.

He didn't have to take this. He spun on his heels and stormed up to his room. There was no way he was staying in this house without her. Especially not with him. He grabbed a bag and stuffed some clothes in then went to his closet to dig out the box of cash he'd been saving and threw it in the bag as well. Then stormed his way down stairs.

"Where do you think you're going?" His father asked. He still sounded angry but he actually looked scared.

"You have never hurt me before. You went too far this time, Dad. I'm not going to take that. Despite what you think I don't deserve to be treated like that. Im hurting too! That was my mom!" He yelled. His father's face melted into a look of shame and regret.

"Dakota...I didn't mean it. Please I didn't mean it." He cried.

"You did though!" Dakota yelled backing his way towards the door, "you hit me four times...you could've stopped. You knew it was wrong and you knew what you were doing to me." His fists clenched as he glared down at his father, "I'm leaving." He stated calmly then stormed out the door and out to his car. He didn't know where he was going. All he knew was that he had to get away. She was gone and now so was he

#i was gone #chapter five #shes gone #runaway #death #badboy #bad relationship #father #broken dishes #sunflower #blue #sad #heartbreak

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