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sparklingichigo · 3 years

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OVA I - Date gone wrong

Somewhere in Asmo's room, Asmo is trying to find the right outfit for his date. He ends up calling up Ichigo and Haruka to his room.

Asmo: BESTIES I NEED HEEELPP!!!

Ichigo: Sis, what's wrong? What happened??

Haruka: Whoa, I did not expect that-

Why did she say that? Because Asmo's bed is full of clothes and ironically this fashionista can't find a good outfit of the day.

Haruka: What's happening? Why are your clothes all over the place?

Asmo: That is the problem! I have no idea what to wear!!

Haruka: To wear to...?

Asmo: Solomon asked me out on a date... it's been a while since I go out with him and I panicked so here we are!

Ichigo: O-oh! Fashion emergency! Right, right. We'll help you.

Haruka: Yeah, we'll help you!

And they did. First off is just normal things he wears every day, the second one is the cute strawberry dress but he wore that already so here we are on the third option.

Ichigo: This is the one...

Haruka: I think so too!

Asmo: Ah finally, I have a good outfit for the date! Thanks a lot, you two! I owe you one!

Ichigo: It's okay, it's the least we could do... ^^

Asmo: Oh well, it's time for me to do my hair and my make-up. Now out!

Haruka: You're kicking us out?

Asmo: Yes.

Ichigo: I-

Before Ichigo can even talk, she hears the brothers creating chaos again, so they have no choice but to get out and deal with that. Especially since they hear Lucifer's shout of one name,

Lucifer: M A M M O N!!!!!!!!

Ichigo: Okay...guess we do have a reason to get out.

Haruka: Yeah... let's go^^

Once they're out, they see Solomon and Mammon arguing in the hallways with Lucifer facepalming.

Ichigo: What happened?!

Lucifer: As you can see... [sigh]

Mammon: I'm just being a good brother and-

Solomon: How is preventing me from dating your brother is being a good brother?!

Mammon: First off, you are sus! Second of all, my little brother Asmo is too precious for you!

Solomon: .... He's the one who confessed to me first though... :(

Mammon: Still! If you dare hurt my little brother.... [transforms into his demon form] YOU'RE D E A D!

Lucifer: .... [sigh in where should I hang him again]

Solomon: Lucifer, you agree to me dating Asmo right?!

Lucifer: Not quite, but as long as Asmo is happy.

Ichigo: [sigh] Here we go again... Mammon, calm down. They've been dating for years.

Mammon: tsk. He's still sus nonetheless

Lucifer: Mammooooonnn!!

Mammon: Eek! See you, humans! Bye! [runs off]

As Mammon runs off, Asmo appears with Mammon running towards him.

Asmo: Mammon wtf- OmG!! [falls off lol]

Human trio: Asmo!!

Asmo: Nooo! My haiiirr!! ;-;

Asmo: Mammon.... I'm gonna kill you!

Mammon: Got no time for that! [still running away]

Unironically, a certain tall demon is there. Of course, Mammon didn't see that and bumped on Beel yet again.

Beel: Mammon?

Mammon: Hehe... hi...

Beel: What happened? Hey, Asmo, are you okay?

Asmo: NO?! MY HAIR IS RUINED! IT'S NOW ALL DIRTY AND I SPEND MINUTES ON THIS!!

Beel: .... oh...

Lucifer: Beel! Hold him back!

Beel: I am... :D

Mammon: LET GO OF ME!!

Beel: Lucifer told me to hold you back though

Mammon: That doesn't mean you should listen to him!!

Satan: As much as I dislike him, you've crossed the line

Mammon: Tf! Where did you come from?!

Satan: Oh, I was behind Beel.

Mammon: [sad/scared noises]

Lucifer: Thank you, Beel^^ [dragging Mammon away]

Beel: No problem! Enjoy your punishment Mammon!!

Mammon: f*ck you!

Lucifer: ^^Language

Mammon: ugh...

Okay back to Asmo and Solomon and the others.

Ichigo: Do you want me to help you with that hair?

Asmo: .... Uhm... I don't know...

Ichigo: I can always help styling it^^

Asmo: I'm gonna be late though :(

Solomon: It's okay, my love^^ You look just fine. We'll just need to brush them.

Ichigo: That's right! Here let me help you! [brushes Asmo's hair and basically fixing it]

Asmo: Ichigo you saint!! Thank you so much!

Ichigo: You're wel- [sees Solomon and Haruka arguing]

Haruka: Oh ho ho ho since when have you been dating him?

Solomon: ....years?

Haruka: How many years?

Solomon: .... since forever after? HOW THE HECK AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW!

Asmo: 30 years to be exact^^ [glares at Solomon] you didn't remember our anniversary?!

Solomon: I do... I just don't know how many years have we been dating...

Satan: and that's how he got 50 on our math test^^

Solomon:...

Asmo: pfft-

Ichigo: He did?

Haruka: What?

Satan: Ichigo, you're literally in the same class with him.

Ichigo: That's been weeks! How am I supposed to remember?!

Satan: Touche, ironically I'm in a different major yet I remember^^

Ichigo: Whatever. Aren't you guys going on your date?

Solomon: Oh yeah, we are! Let's go, my love^^

Asmo: Let's go!

And so, Asmo and Solomon went on their date, specifically to the human world and Solomon being Solomon uses a portal to get there. Mammon of course is hanged by Lucifer's chandelier, we have no idea how long he's gonna be there though.

Satan: Anyways, what do we do now?

Beel: Eat +w+

Satan: You just frickin eat my APPLE PIE twice!

Beel: You told me I can have it :((

Satan: Right....avatar of gluttony. Shouldn't be surprised.

Ichigo: How about we go to Madam screams, Hon ^^

Beel: Sure, let's go!

With that, this leaves Satan and Haruka alone in the House of Lamentation. The two have no idea what to do, sure Satan has a lot of ideas for this like going to the cat cafe, library, art museum, his least choice is the mall, he dislikes it a lot.

Satan: So, what do you want to do?

Haruka: Hmm... I don't know... maybe I'll just draw or do some karaoke or something. Maybe walk around or....play some games.... probably with Levi if he's around.

Satan: Oh.

Haruka: What?

Satan: So you prefer to hang out with Levi? [leaning closer to her]

Haruka: w-wait no! That's not what I meant- [moving backward bcs why the fck is he so close-]

Satan: Then what do you mean by that? [haha kabedon happens]

Haruka: uh.... [trying to escape] you're too close.... [sweat drops]

Satan: I'm waiting^^

Haruka: I mean.... [hugs him instead] I do like playing games with Levi but I don't mind hanging out with you^^

Satan: .... [blushes a bit bcs Haruka barely does skinship on him]

Haruka: Are you by chance....jealous? Because of me playing with Levi?

Satan: What if I am? You know I'm really possessive about you, right?

Haruka: True...then we'll do what you want! What do you want to do?

Satan: I have a couple of ideas in mind^^

Haruka: Hm? What are they?

Satan: Well we can go to cat cafe, the library, art museum, probably the mall but we'll probably end up in a book store instead.

Haruka: Hmm... how about walking around the garden?

Satan: Hm? Garden?

Haruka: The castle's garden^^

Satan: Can we actually go there?

Haruka: Of course! He'd accept us. Why? Scared?

Satan: Me? Scared? Quite bold of you to assume such things. [more kabedon]

Haruka: Satan! Stop tha- Oh! There's a cat!

Satan: Huh?! Where?! [looks around]

With that, Haruka escapes all the way to the castle leaving Satan confused in house of lamentation.

Satan: ...where did she go??

Meanwhile, in Madam's scream, Beel is enjoying his 2nd plate of waffles as Ichigo watches him as she sips on her drink.

Beel: Oh, you have something near your lips...

Ichigo: Hm? Which part?

Beel: Right here^^ [takes the cream off easily with his finger]

Ichigo: O-oh... [blushes]

Beel: It tastes really sweet by the way^^

Ichigo: Eeeh?!

Beel: It really is

Ichigo: You can just ask if you want some-

Beel: Well where's the fun in that^^

Ichigo: [huffs]

Beel: By the way, do you want some? [offers his waffle]

Ichigo: N-no thanks... I'm not hungry-

Beel: Not even one bite? It's the strawberry one~

Ichigo: F-fine... [accepts Beel's offer]

Internally, Ichigo is really confused. Since when is Beel such a romantic? Well, he always is but since when is he this smooth. He's usually clueless just pretty much viewed as innocent and slow. But here he is.

Beel: Well, I'm more comfortable with you now so I can show you the real me^^

Ichigo: The real you meaning gremlin Beel?

Beel: Not necessarily a gremlin but I can be that if you want me to-

Ichigo: I- no thank you;///;

Beel: Oh too bad, you're so cute to tease^^

Ichigo: Beel! ;////; please-

Beel: Hm? Oh my! You've turned into a cherry! Did I overstep?

Ichigo: ....n-not really but... I-I don't mind this side at all [blushing really hard]

Beel: Alright then^^ [pats her].

Ichigo: I- Uh, your waffle isn't finished yet...

Beel: Oh yeah. Where do you wanna go next by the way?

Ichigo: The mall?

Beel: Hmm... Sure^^ We can go to that mall. Right after I finish this

Ichigo: Aw okay then^^

Now back to Haruka, she's now in the castle meeting Barbatos who's very very confused.

Barbatos: Are you okay?

Haruka: Yeah- [pants some more] I'm okay-

Barbatos: Do you want some tea? Water?

Haruka: Tea... make it cold

Barbatos, internally: Such a crime...but okay

So Barbatos prepares ice tea despite him disliking it. He also provides sugar cubes instead she needs them.

Barbatos: Here you go^^ [put the glass to the table]

Haruka: Thank you, Barb!

Barbatos: You're most welcome. It is my duty to serve Lord Diavolo's guests^^

Haruka: Speaking of him, where is he?

Barbatos: In a meeting, he won't be home until.... 5 pm I believe. It seems to be a long event.

Haruka: Oh? You're not going with him?

Barbatos: Unfortunately not^^ He told me to stay put and keep the castle safe.

Haruka: Ah I- [sees Satan appearing at the castle] Oh sht-

Barbatos: What's wrong?

Haruka: Hide me.

Barbatos: Come again?

Haruka: Hide me from that! [points at Satan from a distance]

Barbatos: Oh my goodness! [teleports the two of them away before Satan can even reach them]

Satan: [pants as soon as he reaches the table] Where did they go??

Meanwhile, Haruka and Barbatos end up in the kitchen.

Barbatos: You will be safe here. What happened? Did you have a fight with him?

Haruka: Not necessarily a fight.... he's just acting weird again...

Barbatos: Weird? How weird?

Haruka: He's just acting weird! When I talked about gaming with Levi, he instantly corners me into a wall and leaning closer. It's just so weird!!

Barbatos: Ah I see... [holding back his laugh]

Haruka: It isn't funny, Barb! I'm scared and creeped out! What's happening to him?!

Barbatos: Maybe you're discovering a new side to him. Good luck getting used to it^^ I'll return you to him.

Haruka: What?! Barb- Nooo!! [got returned to Satan]

Back at the table, Satan is walking around until he hears a portal opening on top of him, and here comes Haruka falling down from that portal.

Haruka: AAAAA!!! SATAN!! WATCH OUT!!

Satan: Huh? [looks up] Oh my! [catches her in time] You could've fallen for me in another way^^

Haruka: Tha-that's not the point! [flicks his forehead]

Satan: At least you're not injured^^

Haruka: L-let me down! I can walk by myself!

Satan: Not a chance, you'll run off again. Especially when I want to hang out with you.

Haruka: There you go again! Acting weird again!

Satan: What? Is my calm demeanor shocking to you?

Haruka: Y-yeah... sort off. Get that handsome face away from me! [looking away]

Satan: Oh? So you think I am handsome?

Haruka: Uh- Shut up, you stupid raging ball of chaos!!

Satan: I don't remember being stupid considering I got first ranked in our class^^ [talking as he's walking out of the castle]

Yeah, anyways, the two end up going to the mall. Yes, I'm talking Beel and Ichigo. Satan and Haruka went to that same mall but we'll talk about that later. Now let's watch Mammon get punish.

Mammon: How long am I staying here again?

Lucifer: 30 more minutes.

Levi: Ha! That's what you get for being stupid!

Mammon: Say that to your math exam, you weeb!

Levi: At least I got 65! Unlike you on that English exam!

Mammon: English is difficult you piece of-

Lucifer: [glaring at them] Levi, do you want to be hanged as well? I told you to come here to watch him, not create more chaos!

Levi: No thank you. Right, so I'm here to watch him?

Lucifer: correct. I'm pretty late for my meeting with Lord Diavolo. I just skipped two periods of it so I'll be off^^ Make sure he doesn't create trouble. If anything happens just contact me or maybe the angels. I'm sure Simeon would love to drench him in holy water

Mammon: What?! Nooo!!

Levi: You can count on me! I'll make sure he doesn't escape.... can I do it though?

Lucifer: I believe in you, Leviathan^^ Please do your best

Levi: O-okay... I'll try my best [nods]

Now back to the mall. Beel and Ichigo end up in a clothing store. Beel has 0 idea what fashion was but he likes watching Ichigo try out some of the clothes.

Ichigo: So? What do you think?

Beel: It looks great! Probably looked better on the floor in our room-

Ichigo: Beelzebub Morningstar!

Beel: no no no I'm joking. It looks great! I prefer the last one you wore though. The floral top and the red skirt.

Ichigo: Oh... well what about the pink collection? What's your choice?

Beel: Hmm...

Ichigo: Don't you dare make a dirty joke!

Beel: Do you want me to?

Ichigo: Beelzebub! [yeets a shoe at him]

Beel: [luckily catches it] Now, now, there's no need to get worked up, sugar^^

Ichigo: ^^ I might throw another one if you keep on making that dirty joke

Beel: Is your shirt next- [got hit by another shoe]

Ichigo: You've hung out too much with Asmo! Or have you been watching those animes with Levi?!

Beel: What anime are you talking about? I did watch the one with desserts on it.

Ichigo: Specify which anime was it...

Beel: Well there's a lot actually...

Ichigo: Doesn't explain this sudden change [glares at him suspiciously]

Beel: I mostly just focus on the food so I guess... this is just me being comfortable with you^^

Ichigo: Right- So the pink collection! Which one?

Beel: isn't that white?

Ichigo: Yeah but most of them are pink so they somehow called it the "pink collection" which is odd I know.

Beel: The puffy pink one looks nice, the white dress too^^

Ichigo: So both?

Beel: Both^^

Ichigo: Since you like both... are you gonna pay for it?

Beel: I might if you need help paying for it.

Ichigo: The-then we'll get this too! [shows a floral dress]

Beel: Anything for you^^

Ichigo internally: HAVE LEVI BEEN SHOWING HIM MAID SAMA?! USUI IS THAT YOU?! WTF-

Beel: Ooh! So that's the anime that has all the food :o

Ichigo: Hm? What do you mean?

Beel: Never mind^^ Don't mind me! Let's go and pay for the clothes~

Ichigo: Okay, let's go^^

As they walk to the cashier, their hands keep on brushing on each other that Beel ends up holding her hand.

Ichigo: U-uh can you hold them properly like that?

Beel: I'll be fine^^

Ichigo: Do you not want me to help?

Beel: It's okay, you already have enough stuff in your bag, plus your hand seem heavy I have to hold it for you-

Ichigo: [blushes furiously] Shut up you gluttonous bear!

Now, let's go upstairs. Now Haruka and Satan are looking at a menu on some restaurant in that mall.

Haruka: So... what do you want to order?

Satan: Are you on the menu?

Haruka: [steps on Satan's foot] I'm not food!

Satan: Ouch! Geez, you're so violent today!

Haruka: Says you! Since when is your brain as dirty as mud?!

Satan: [chuckles slightly] Oh? How do you know?

Haruka: OMG! Shut up you furry!!

Satan: Oh well, I'll order this one^^ [to the cashier]

Haruka: I'll have the sizzling beef curry rice, the package one!

Cashier: I see, so one sizzling beef curry rice package, Beef, and Salmon pepper rice. Is that all? Anything else? No drinks? [to Satan]

Satan: Oh... hmm.... I'll have Lemon Tea^^ Thanks a lot, Miss

Cashier: N-no problem o///o

Haruka: Tsk. [looks away sulkily]

Cashier: Here's your alarm when the food is ready^^ Hope you enjoy [gives the alarm to Satan]

Satan: Thank you^^ Have a nice day, Miss.

Cashier: y-you too, sir o///o

Haruka: [glares at the cashier]

Cashier: O-O

Haruka: [gives the cashier a warning look]

Satan: Oh? A little jealous I see^^

Haruka: I'm not!

Satan: I'm just being polite, babe. There's no harm in that^^

Haruka: Whatever. Sit here! I'll go sit there!

Satan: Oh? Why so?

Haruka: Because I want to!

Satan: Alright then, let's go, we'll sit there^^

Haruka: N-no! I meant-

Satan: Come on, let's go~ [leads Haruka to that far away seat]

Haruka: You stupid raging ball of chaos!!

Satan: For the last time, I'm first ranked in our class, that insult doesn't affect me. ^^

Haruka: Whatever! Do what you want!

After a few minutes, the alarm starts to ring. Haruka of course is still sulking so Satan ends up getting the food for them. As he gets them, the female cashiers are gushing because of how handsome he is.

Satan: I know, but unfortunately I'm taken^^

Cashier 1: oh... :(

Cashier 2: Really?

Satan: Yes, I'm taken. So just give me my order. [went to cynical mode]

Cashier 1: He-here it is sir! [gives the foods and drinks to him]

Satan: Thank you. [flat face lol]

With that Satan returns to his table and finds Haruka texting on her DDD turns out she's talking to Ichigo.

Ichigo: Just got out from Majolish, you?

Haruka: Majolish? Are you in Devildom's city mall?

Ichigo: Yeah... why?

Haruka: Omg gurl! I'm at Paper Lunch!

Ichigo: ....3rd floor?

Haruka: Yeah?

Ichigo: Omg we should hang out!!

Haruka: Well Satan and I are gonna watch a movie after this, do you wanna come?

Ichigo: Depends on the movie. If it's gore then I'll back away.

Haruka: I dislike gore as well, don't worry. I prefer action though.

Ichigo: Oh yeah, action is good.

In real life, their boyfriends are curious so they peek through their phones.

Ichigo: Beel... you're a bit too close...

Beel: Oh, I'm just curious. Who are you texting?

Ichigo: Haruka. Who else?

Beel: Just in case it was another guy.

Ichigo: Solomon?

Beel: [nods]

Ichigo: [smacks Beel's shoulder] you idiot! That'd mean I'm interrupting his date with Asmo! Why would I disturb his date?!

Beel: You guys seemed really close so-

Ichigo: Since when are you bothered by this?? [confusion went brr] I thought you trusted me!

Beel: I do, what I don't trust is him^^

Ichigo: No worries, Solomon and I are just buddies^^

Beel: Okay^^ I'll trust you.

The same thing happened with Satan, Satan is secretly peeking at Haruka's phone. Haruka is of course oblivious until she heard Satan's voice.

Satan: The food's here^^

Haruka: [looks up] Gah! Why are you so close?!

Satan: Curiosity. Who are you texting?

Haruka: Ichigo...?

Satan: Ah...

Haruka: Who do you think I was texting?

Satan:...

Haruka: ....Solomon?

Satan: [nods] You guys seemed really close.

Haruka: [pushes his forehead away] We're just friends but I'm clearly texting Ichigo. Here, you can read the chatroom. [hands him her phone]

Satan: O-oh....okay [reading the chatroom as Haruka eats]

Haruka: Anyways, wanna watch a movie after? [accepting her phone back and putting it into her purse]

Satan: Hmmm we can do that. What movie are we watching though?

Haruka: We'll just see.

Satan: Sounds fair.

As they're eating, Ichigo and Beel appear beside them.

Ichigo: Hi^^

Beel: Whoa! That smells really good!

Satan: no no no no order one yourself!

Ichigo: Hon...^^ didn't we just ate?

Beel: Well...yeah. Let's just order drinks or snacks.

Ichigo: Pudding! Let's order that

Beel: Sure^^

So, Beel and Ichigo order their food. The cashier is intimidated by his height. He was about to flirt with Ichigo actually because Ichigo is pretty and friendly.

Beel: I'll order 3 chocolate puddings, what about you, sugar?^^

Ichigo: I'll have oreo cheese!

Cashier 3: So...three chocolate puddings and one oreo cheese pudding. Anything else, miss? Drinks?

Ichigo: Hm... I'll have blackcurrant, what about you, Beel?

Beel: .... I'll have the chocolate milkshake^^

Cashier 3: Alright then, that'd be [insert price here] and here's the alarm, miss^^ [gives it to Ichigo]

Ichigo: Thank you^^

Beel: [glares at the cashier]

Cashier 3: A-anyways, here's your changes! Have a nice day^^

Ichigo: You too!

Once they sit down, Satan notices Beel's mood is sinking down.

Satan: You okay?

Beel: I'm fine... all this overthinking is making me hungry :((

Ichigo: The food is gonna come anyway^^ don't worry.

Beel: Hm.

Ichigo: Beel? Beelzebub? Honeybear?

Beel: Oh? So now you call me Honeybear? [leans closer to her]

Ichigo: I-is that a bad thing? [moving back]

Beel: That cashier is clearly about to hit on you though.

Ichigo: Aw Honeybear, don't worry^^ I was just being polite. I only love you remember?

Beel: You should, I'm not sharing you with anyone

Before Ichigo can answer him, she feels a vibration in her pocket. She fishes out the alarm and turns out their food is done.

Ichigo: Wanna go get the pudding together?

Beel: Sure^^

And so, Beel and Ichigo go to get their pudding. This time it's Cashier 2 giving them the pudding. Luckily no chaos happened.

Beel: Thank you! Have a nice day!

Cashier 2: You too, sir^^ Enjoy your meal!

Ichigo: ...Is that guy okay?

Cashier 2: Cleary not, but don't mind him. Enjoy your meal, miss^^

Ichigo: Alright then^^

After their lunch, the four of them go to the theaters to see what movie are they gonna watch. The list is endless and they're now confused.

Beel: none of them seem delicious. So Nah, I'll let you guys choose.

Ichigo: You're not eating a movie...

Beel: I know, but I'm letting you guys choose^^

Satan: What about that one? [points to a scary-looking poster]

Ichigo: Venom II?

Haruka: Ooh! I like that! We can watch that since I've watched the first movie.

Satan: There's the first movie?

Haruka: Y-yeah.... ^^

Satan: Then it'd be spoilers.... what about this one?

Haruka: Jungle Cruise sounds fun^^ An Adventure comedy movie

Satan: What about the others? Wait where did Beel go?

Ichigo: ...going to see the food:")

Satan: [sigh] Well, what do you think? Shall we watch this?

Ichigo: Yeah, it sounds fun. ^^ I'll be right back though [goes to search for Beel]

Haruka: So, Jungle Cruise?

Satan: Yeah. Sir, we'll have four tickets for Jungle Cruise.

Theater Cashier: Oh, which seat sir?

Haruka: B! Let's go with B!

Theater Cashier: Oh, you're in luck! The B seat is empty for now^^

Satan: That's great! We'll have four tickets in that B seat.

Theater Cashier: ^^ Okay. The total would be [insert price]

This time Satan paid for the tickets despite Haruka's protest. He just simply told her to pay him back if she feels that bad. Meanwhile, Ichigo is confused because Beel actually ordered drinks instead of food.

Ichigo: Just drinks?

Beel: Yeah, I'm thirsty... in both ways.

Ichigo: [smacks Beel's shoulder] Beel!

Beel: Alright, alright, I bought drinks for you guys though^^

Ichigo: Eh? Really?

Beel: Yep! A sweet ice tea for Haruka, Lemon tea for Satan, Strawberry tea for you, and....water for me ^^

Ichigo: Water? Are you sure?

Beel: Yep! Since I've drunk a lot of sweets at least I have to clean my palate.

Ichigo: That's smart^^

So here they are in the B seat. Here are the seat orders; Haruka, Ichigo, Beel and Satan. Of course, the boys are sort of disappointed with the seating order.

Satan: But-

Haruka: Sit with your brother! I prefer to hang out with my best friend rather than you and your dirty jokes!

Satan: What even did I do?!

Haruka: [rolls her eyes and seats on her seat]

Beel: Sugar, are you sure?

Ichigo: I am^^ don't worry. I'm beside you anyways~

Beel: Oh yeah, yay!

Ichigo: no touchy-touchy though! >:o [cute angy noises]

Beel: I won't promise, especially when you look this cute^^

Ichigo: Tsk. Whatever you gluttonous bear! Uh.... do you want some by the way? [offers the strawberry tea]

Beel: Oh thank you^^ [drinks the strawberry tea without any second thoughts]

Ichigo: How does it taste? Is it good?

Beel: It is, just like you^^

Ichigo: [blushes deep red] h-hon... I don't think flirting here is a good idea [sees Haruka and Satan in a bad mood]

Beel: Oh right... :(

Satan: [getting annoyed every second]

Haruka: [plays with her phone because the advertisement is annoying]

Haruka: wait... is that Asmo?!

Ichigo: Oh my goodness! You're right!

Asmo, in the ad: Use Majolish lipstick to get beautiful pucker lips! Mwah! [blows the kiss towards the camera]

Satan: [sigh] why must he be here...

Haruka: Whoa! I never knew he's an ad model!

Ichigo: So am I! That's so cool!

Beel: ...the lipstick looks delicious-

Ichigo: Hon...you can't eat lipsticks^^

Beel: Oh they were lipsticks?

Ichigo: Yeah??

Beel: Do you want me to buy you one?

Ichigo: So sudden?

Beel: Just feel like treating you^^ [pulls Ichigo closer so she can lean on his shoulder]

Ichigo: You don't have to though :<

Satan: [is on his limit] Can't you two just get a room?!

Ichigo: Deal with your own business! Plus we're gonna watch a movie, shut it!

Satan: Tsk.

So the movie has started. Everyone is enjoying the movie, including the couple. Haruka is enjoying every second of this and Satan is surprisingly amused by this movie. Yep, romance has left the chatroom for Beel and Ichigo because this movie is so funny.

Overall their movie adventure went well and they went home. As they went home, they waited for Asmo and Solomon to get back. Seconds become minutes, minutes become hours. It's to the point that It's already 10 p.m and he hasn't returned. This causes Lucifer to worried!

Lucifer: Have you girls seen Asmo?

Ichigo: Not that I know off, why? We just got back from the mall and didn't meet him there.

Lucifer: I see... it's already 10 p.m and he hasn't returned yet.

Satan: Knowing Asmo he'd probably bang Solomon again [coming in casually]

Lucifer: [smacks Satan's head] You! Since when did you have such a dirty mind?!

Satan: I always do, just not exposed much, D A D.

Lucifer: [glares at Satan]

Beel: I'm sure he'll be okay^^ Asmo can defend himself and so can Solomon.

Lucifer: I'm not concerned about that sorcerer. He can die for all I care. What I'm worried about is what he'd do to Asmo!

Beel: ...Oh my...you're right-

Lucifer: Oh well, I'll just search for him myself. Rest up you four^^ I'm sure you guys are tired. I'll be off [transforms to demon form and flies away]

Ichigo: Are you sure he doesn't need any help?

Beel: Sugar, you're literally this close to sleep. Come, I'll get you to your room.

Ichigo: It's fine.... I'll go myself. Just help me with the shopping bags...

Beel: I'll still help you though^^

As Beel helps Ichigo to her room, Haruka clings to Satan causing confusion of the avatar of wrath.

Satan: What's wrong?

Haruka: Lift me up.... to my bedroom.... [clinging on him]

Satan: As you wish^^ [haha bridal style]

Haruka: w-wait that's not what I expected- o////o

Satan: it's more comfortable for us anyway. Let's go^^ [carries her to her bedroom]

Haruka: B-but piggy back-

Satan: Just hold on to me, you can lean on my shoulder that way^^

Haruka: O-okay >////<

The night, Lucifer is still looking for Asmo and he finally spots him on his way to the House of Lamentation.

Lucifer: Asmodeus!

Asmo: ...Lucifer?!

Solomon: WTF-

Lucifer: [flies down and lands right in front of them]

Asmo: I-I can explain...

Lucifer: It's okay, I'm sure you're really tired. What I need an explanation of is him. [eyes Solomon]

Solomon: M-me?

Lucifer: Yes. So, where did you take him?

Solomon: The human world....? and we went shopping [shows shopping bag]

Lucifer: Uh-huh...

Lucifer: Wait- you went to where?!

Solomon: Human world...?

Lucifer: That is clearly forbidden to demons without the approval of Lord Diavolo! What are you thinking?!

Solomon: You didn't ask where I want how am I supposed to know!

Lucifer: You are dating a demon! A high-level demon! Taking him to the human world is against the law!

Solomon:...

Asmo: I-it's okay... I got one from Diavolo.... here! [shows a letter already signed by Diavolo]

Lucifer: Really? [sees the letter] Ah, so you did ask for permission?

Asmo: Of course... I'm not a rogue demon, Lucifer. Besides, I won't look good in prison clothing.

Lucifer: Alright. I'll get you back. You, go back to Purgatory hall.

Solomon: What-

Lucifer: You heard me, go back to your dormitory.

Solomon: What about his shopping bag?

Lucifer: Put them in his room then go back to purgatory hall. You're forbidden to stay in the House of Lamentation for three days.

Asmo and Solomon: What?!

Lucifer: Just Solomon

Asmo: that doesn't make it any better?! Who is going to deal with me when I'm in heat?!

Lucifer: Then we'll call him when you actually need him.

And so that ends this episode. All the three couples have their fun even though Solomon ends up with a punishment of not meeting Asmo for three days but he'll survive... will he....?

Simeon: It's okay, Solomon... it's just three days...

Solomon: I CAN'T!!! I MISS HIM A LOT!!! [sobbing dramatically]

Luke: It's been two days...

Solomon: Yeah TWO DAYS! EXACTLY! I can't even be apart from him for a few hours now it's for two days!

Michael: It's just two days, Solomon. You can focus more on your training or teaching Luke for his classes.

Solomon: [eating his ice cream in sadness]

The same thing is happening to Asmo, he's eating ice cream with the girls as they watch some random chick flick on the TV.

Ichigo: you'll be okay, it's just for a few days.

Asmo: Still! Who's gonna help me when I need help in that way?!

Ichigo: We can always call him when you really need him.

Asmo: I don't wanna cheat on him anymore. We've been in so many affairs because we can't see each other a lot so I end up doing stuff to a succubus but now I wanna focus my lust only on him, the one I truly love.

Haruka: Awww, that's really sweet of you Asmo!

Asmo: Yeah.... but for now I should deal with my toys for those three days if I need help and such.

Ichigo: there-there [pats Asmo] by the way... what have you been telling Beel and Satan?

Asmo: Hm? What do you mean?

Haruka: Satan is unusually dirty-minded yesterday.

Asmo: Oh? He did read a lot of sensual books so that explains his behavior.

Ichigo: What about Beel?

Asmo: Beel? He always is perverted! You didn't notice? Probably because he's really quiet the entire time that's why it came out that day. He's a demon, after all, a gluttonous one in fact. You don't think he'd use that sin on something else?

Ichigo: You mean....?

Asmo: Mmhmm^^

Ichigo: ... Oh my Lord...

Haruka: What has Satan be reading...

Satan: Some sensual books, as he said.

Haruka: Gah! Where did you come from?!

Satan: by the door...?

Haruka: Ish you! [smacks him]

Satan: ouch! Why are you so violent these days?!

Haruka: That's because of your perverted mind, you stupid raging ball of chaos!

Satan: You love this raging ball of chaos though^^

Asmo: ew, get a room.

Satan: Alright-

Haruka: Wait what- [get lift up by Satan] wait! Asmo! Ichigo!! Help me!!

Asmo: Have fun, darling~ ^^ [waves in a girlish way]

Ichigo: pfft- Good luck dealing with him.

#obeymefanfic #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me solomon #my mcs #roleplaybased #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan

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riverboundao3ff · 4 years

Text

Riverbound Chapter 8

As it turned out, you would not be dashing off on a dangerous quest as the valiant hero determined to save Alternia. Not yet, anyways.

However, you would be helping to prepare for Tyzias’s mission that is planned for tomorrow, which has your blood pumping as the teal whips out a map of Thrashthrust, with one smaller area circled in red marker, and slaps it down in the middle of the carpet you’re all gathered around.

“This is Her Imperial Condescension’s Drone Factory of the General Thrashthrust Area,” Tyzias begins. “In about thirty hours, all drones in the city will report back to the factory in four waves for about one hour each to upload new information to the government’s databases. Information like this includes individuals who are at risk of being culled, cellular data that’s been used to track people as they go about their night, and most importantly, if there’s any signs of rebellion. The drones will also be undergoing their regular maintenance checks.”

Daraya reaches over and taps a claw to the area circled in red. “While there are a few trolls there to make sure everything’s running smoothly, the uploading of data and maintenance checks are done by computers. What we want is to get into those computers and wipe out the data. Bonus points if we can wreck the computers, too.”

“That kind of technology won’t just be out in the open for anybody to get into, much less the information needed to actually access the good stuff,” Mallek says, tapping the pad of his pointer finger to his other fist. He’s tense, and for a good reason.

“We won’t be doing any hacking this time. Maybe if we had more time in between waves, but…” Stelsa shakes her head. “No, we’re going to have to take a more… crude approach.”

Tagora smiles and drums his claws against his knees. “The factory’s heavily protected against things like solar flares, but only from the outside. If something like, say, a massive electromagnetic pulse were to go off inside…”

Mallek raises a brow. “You have electro-bombs?”

“For legal reasons, no. For other reasons… just don’t ask me anything about any bombs, please.”

You grin at Tagora. “Hell yes, Gor-Gor.”

“Hell no, Gor-Gor,” Tirona begs, tugging on his sleeve.

“Try and stop me, you little gremlin.”

Tirona groans dramatically and flops back on the loungeplank with her hands over her face.

You’re absolutely amazed at how much your friends have changed since you disappeared. Who could have thought that Tagora Gorjek, of all people, would join up with a whole-ass rebellion? Or Stelsa, for that matter? Even Tirona seems resigned to the fact that she’s going to end up involved whether she likes it or not.

“So how are we getting the bombs in there?” Wanshi chirps.

“Orginally, I had a plan that consisted of people sneaking in and out of the buildings between waves. Different drones go to different buildings for their business. Now, we have a much easier and quicker way of doing the whole thing.” Tyzias nods to you.

“We understand if you still need more time to recover, though,” Daraya adds quickly.

You meet her gaze without hesitation. “I’m ready.”

This is why I’m here, kiddo. For your future, for all of our futures, for this planet. I just wish I could tell you that.

“... Wait. Before we go any further, there’s something you said earlier that everybody seems to be overlooking. Something very important.”

You turn to Lanque and are surprised by how intensely he’s looking at you. Dark green eyes glint sharply through his bangs.

“What’s up?” you offer.

“When you explained to us what happened to you, you said that you had come back to Alternia, but… in the future. If you went to the future, then you must know how this all turns out,” Lanque states matter-of-factly.

Your heart sinks.

“Believe me, you’re not the only one who’s been thinking about that,” Tyzias growls before you can try to defend yourself. “But the thing is, we can’t know.”

Watching the realization hit your friends is like watching a car accident. You wince as Tagora, Tirona, and Stelsa glare at you furiously. Wanshi and Karako look confused, and then nervous.

“And why not?” Stelsa demands.

Thankfully, Daraya chucks her pen at Lanque with a hiss. “Because, you morons! If we know the wrong things, we could screw up everything! If they tell us we win, we might slack off at the wrong times and get ourselves killed. If we lose, then what’s stopping you from just giving up?”

“I don’t like not knowing things,” Tagora says coldly.

“Tough!”

Lanque grimaces. “This is definitely not where I meant to go with this. I was just hoping for a few words of reassurance from our dear friend that they actually have a plan to help us succeed.”

“And I do!” you promise desperately, shooting to your feet. “Look, I know it’s crazy of me to ask you guys to trust me with something like this, especially since I’ve been gone so long. But in…” You pause to do some quick math. “In seven nights I’m supposed to report back to my friends in the future. If we all work together, then we will be able to do this with the least amount of casualties, in the least amount of time.”

“Can we trust these friends of yours?” Tyzias asks.

“Yes. I wish I could tell you more, but…” you trail off, at a loss for words.

“This is barnacles,” Tirona whispers to Wanshi.

“The thing is, y’all don’t have a choice. They can time-travel. They can provide your rebellion with critical information about what to do next. Like it or not, they are your key to victory,” Mallek snaps, pointing to you with one sharp claw. “If you guys wanna keep whining about them trying to protect the stability of the timeline or whatever then that’s your fuckin’ problem. I trust them to do the right thing no matter what, and so should you.”

You want to hug him again. “Thank you, Mallek.”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Adalov’s right. With all the shit they’ve been through, I think they’re more than capable of doing this for us,” Lanque agrees.

There’s a moment of tense silence. You’re nauseous again for an entirely different reason.

“... Fine. I mean… yes. You’re right,” Tagora finally admits, trying to not quail under the vicious stares of Daraya and Tyzias. He glances over at you a little remorsefully, and then sits back down besides Stelsa without another word. Stelsa nods, surprisingly quiet for once. Tirona gives you the peace sign and also keeps her mouth shut.

“I won’t let you guys down. That, I promise you,” you tell them.

“Then let’s go already,” Lanque sighs.

“Oh, yeah… uh, where are they?”

“I had them commissioned from a… special artist,” Tagora admits. “An indigo acquaintance of my kismesis.”

“Oh, worm? You and Galekh are official?” you gasp.

“Yes, yes we are. Now don’t go spreading my business around to just anybody! Anyways, his name is Bovois. After I pay him he will most likely try to kill me.”

“I… yeah, I don’t know why that took me off guard. Continue.”

Tagora smiles thinly. “The plan is simple. Bovois and I complete the transaction, I thank him for his time and walk away. He is a wealthy man and will therefore have somebody do the dirty work once I leave his property. I will be… relying on a few choice trolls to help me make sure they don’t succeed.”

“Or I could just teleport you out of there,” you protest.

“And have him call the drones on us once he sees you? I think not.”

You know he’s right, and it pisses you off. “Fine. I’m still coming, though. Just in case.”

“If you insist,” he says, but you can tell he’s happy you want to go with him. “Lanque and Stelsa will be the backup.”

“I’m taking Wanshi and Karako back to the caverns for afternoon classes. Call me with the results,” Daraya orders as she shoos the kids back towards the elevator.

“I’m taking back our brat, too.” Tyzias opts to just sling a squealing Tirona over her shoulder as she marches past Daraya.

“But I’m strong! I can beat up anybody!” Wanshi argues.

“Honk!” Karako makes his displeasure known with a few low notes deep in his throat, which sounds like somebody playing a rusty trumpet.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Come on, Bronya’s already gonna kill me for bringing you two outside, anyways.”

“I know how to walk, Tyzias!” Tirona shrieks.

“Stop screaming in my ear, you short f--”

The chaos is shut off when the elevator doors slide shut. You decide right then and there that you’re never going to have kids of your own.

“Tegiri’s missing out on all the fun,” you tell Tagora.

“Tegiri can shove his sword where the moons don’t shine.” He looks over at Lanque and Stelsa. “I hope you two have been brushing up on your fighting skills, because it’s about to get messy.”

You feel something cool brush against your wrist, and you take Mallek’s hand in your own. He’s looking down at you with big blue eyes that say stay.

It’s too much, and you look down at the sign on his hoodie. “I’ll come back soon.”

“... Promise?”

“Always.”

:::

The four of you take the omniscuttlecar-- no, the omniscuttle… the bus. You take the fucking bus to the highblood part of Thrashthrust.

Somehow you guys find an empty car so that nobody sees your alien ass, but even then you stick close to your friends. You take the chance to catch up with Stelsa, who chats animatedly about a case she just won, which is super cool except you know nothing about Alternian law, so you just smile and nod as she goes on about some legislation invented to protect lowbloods except it really doesn’t. Tagora and Lanque launch into a passionate conversation about different high-brand clothes, which delights you until they turn and start making fun of you and Stelsa.

“Okay, okay! But at least my hair isn’t greasy!” Stelsa yells at Tagora.

“How dare you. I’ll have you know all of my hair products are the highest quality a teal can afford in this economy--”

“Economy? Bitch, that’s just caste oppression,” you shoot back.

He pauses for a second. “Shit. Maybe you’re right. It’s a shame about your pores, though.”

“Gor-Gor, I’m homeless, why would my pores be a priority.”

“Your hair is a little greasy,” Lanque snickers.

“It is not! That’s just hair gel--”

“At least Stelsa and I have asses,” you cut in.

Both Lanque and Tagora turn to you, looking so damn offended Stelsa starts cackling and almost falls out of her seat.

“That was low,” Tagora hisses.

“Yeah, I get low every time I do squats. That’s why I have an ass.”

The boys definitely would have taken turns destroying your life after that, but you’re literally saved by the bell when the speakers above you chime, letting you know you guys reached your destination. You feel the bus slow and your heartbeat speed up.

All at once, the fun drains out of the air like water down the drain. You all look at each other before Tagora gets up, pulls the door open, and marches down the collapsable stairs with his head held high. You’re not fooled, though. Tagora Gorjek is afraid, as he rightfully should be, and he’d rather die than admit it.

You fall in close behind him, with Stelsa and Lanque fanning out on either side. It’s easy to see why they were chosen for this mission-- both of them are big and strong.

“Never took you for the fighting type,” you tell Lanque as you walk down a road that leads to a fancy neighborhood. Each property is so large each hive is no bigger than a pencil eraser on the horizon. The place reeks of privilege.

He winks. “It’s called being well-rounded, darling.”

“Where’d you learn?”

“Let’s just say growing up in the caverns isn’t kind to those who… don’t become what people expect you to become.”

You’re not sure what to make of that, but he doesn’t say anything else on the matter, and you don’t push him. Right now, there’s bigger fish to fry.

Tagora leads you around a curve in the road and stops before the first path on Shatterbone Avenue. Charming. It leads up to an absolutely massive hive that makes Vriska’s castle look like a treehouse. Elegantly pointed spires reach up into the cloudy sky like they’re trying to spear the stars themselves, and buttresses line all the outside walls that you can see. The yard’s just as magnificent, with a lavish garden and an assortment of trees and shrubbery lining the property.

It’s beautiful, but just looking at it makes you feel lonely. How could one person possibly live alone like this, much less grow up in it?

“... Huh,” you say instead of voicing your thoughts.

“Indeed.” Tagora swallows and takes a deep breath. “Well, here goes nothing.”

“We’ll be ready,” you promise him.

He nods stiffly before striding up the path. You, Stelsa, and Lanque slip into the cover of some dense shrub-thing. You’re glad this neighborhood is so spaced out, because if somebody saw some weird pale creature, a teal, and a jade all trying to hide in a bush the drones would be on you like Zebruh trying to get a date.

Through the brush, you see Tagora knock on the door three times and wait. It’s a solid twenty seconds before anybody answers, which you think is a little rude, but whatever.

You become a little less worried about social etiquette when Galekh’s indigo friend steps out to greet Tagora. The dude is fucking massive, with horns that twist around to the front like a bull’s, and with muscles like one, too. Tagora’s always been a little small, but standing in front of this absolute unit he didn’t look to be much more than a wiggler.

“Holy fuck,” you mumble. “Who let that thing out of the caverns?”

“Wasn’t me,” Lanque whispers back.

“Ssh!” Stelsa hisses.

The two start talking after Tagora bows to him. Bovois’s body language looks friendly enough, but from this distance it’s hard to tell. That, and troll body language is way different than human body language.

“Bovois is about to go get the bombs,” Lanque murmurs in your ear.

You shiver a little and tell yourself it’s because your friend is about to be attacked. “You can hear them from here?”

“Can’t you?”

“No.”

Stelsa flicks the both of you upside the head, and you wince. That was gonna bruise.

Sure enough, Bovois disappears back inside the hive for a moment before bringing out an innocent-looking black bag. Tagora opens it and looks inside. Apparently what he wants is in there, because he steps back to clasp Bovois’s huge hand.

“Are they shaking on it or is Gorjek getting his arm ripped off?” Lanque mutters.

“Pfft.”

Without fanfare, it’s over. Tagora bows again and strides off down the path, slinging the backpack over his shoulders. The door closes behind him and takes Bovois with it.

You hold your breath as Tagora nears the end of the walkway, turns, and looks around.

Nobody else is there. Nothing happens.

Stelsa and Lanque look at each other, then at you, and then you all look out at Tagora before carefully emerging back on to the road. Something stabs you in the thigh, and you grunt as you yank out the offending thorn to rub at the irritated area. Lanque brushes off a dead leaf on his sleeve with a look of disgust.

Without a word, the four of you start power walking back down to the neighborhood entrance. Nobody’s running, except you because you have short-ass legs. Just a small group of friends who got turned around and ended up in a highblood area. Nothing to see here, folks.

The walk to the entrance is the shortest and longest of your life. Somehow, all of you make it there, and no other troll in sight. The bus stop is just down the street, and a scuttlebuggy drives by with the bass turned all the way up.

“... Huh,” you say again.

“You’re gonna give me white hair, Gor-Gor,” Stelsa scolds.

Tagora makes a face. “Well--”

Annoyingly enough, it’s Lanque’s crazy good ears that save your asses when a dark blur comes flying around the corner with knives drawn. Tagora gets knocked out of the way just in time for the jade to take the full impact of the attack.

Stelsa screeches with fury as Lanque and the attacker go horns-over-heels into a tree and flings herself into the fray. You stare in horror as Lanque snarls and bites the shit out of his assailant’s forearm, only to get a knife to the shoulder. Stelsa grabs the attacker and flings them back into the tree with a solid thud. The new troll has to be tough as shit, because they just dodge out of the way when Stelsa goes in for the kill. They’re smaller but insanely fast, and before you can so much as blink they’re lunging for Tagora.

A scream builds in your throat, and then--

Lanque hooks his claws into their side, takes them to the ground just as you skid to a stop in front of Tagora. The two flip around in the turf, clawing at each other and screaming like mountain lions. There’s green and teal blood everywhere. It’s on fangs and hands and clothes and all over the blue-gray grass. Stelsa jumps back in, is slashed across the face, and almost gets stabbed, leaning back just in time to get cut across the nose.

Seeing trolls fight is terrifying to watch, but when they really get into it, it’s like watching wild animals try and kill each other.

The attacker finally kicks Lanque off them and whips around to slam their knee into Stelsa’s stomach. The teal goes down with a ragged wheeze, gray face going white. Lanque doesn’t even get the chance to get back up again before there’s a knife going for his gut.

You don’t even think about it, you just act. With a speed you didn’t think a human could have, you charge and ram into the assassin’s side as hard as you possibly can.

The ground and the sky switch places several times before you’re flat on your back. A million miles away, Tagora is screaming something. A shiny point of a silver blade comes down towards your chest.

You brace for impact.

It never comes.

Two huge yellow eyes are staring down at you, pupils blown out in shock. The rest of their face is hidden by their hood and a mask, but even before it’s ripped off by a shaking hand you know who this troll is. You’re not winded but there’s no air in your lungs.

“Polypa?!”

#pesterquest #Hiveswap Friendsim trolls #hiveswap #c8 #riverbound #jadebloods #teals #POLYPAAAA #MSPA reader #The Guardian #holy shiiittt!#homestuck

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