#he has a very good reason for suspecting Neal and when his emotions get the better of him Peter locks up | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

elizabeethan · 3 years

Text

The Days We Defend (Will Turn To Gold)- Chapter 3

Everything is perfect, until it isn’t. Killian and Emma have spent months building a life together after finally defeating Neal and Gold, but when the Dark One dies and his power becomes untethered, everyone in Storybrooke is at risk, and some decisions may have lasting consequences.

Sequel to Walk With Me (I Think We’ll Find A Way)

Prologue, 1, 2

Read on Ao3

Tagging: @courtorderedcake @kmomof4 @stahlop @klynn-stormz @laschatzi @emelizabeth88 @lfh1226-linda @kday426 @profdanglaisstuff @elisethewritingbeast @timeless-love-story @captain-emmajones @gingerpolyglot @ebcaver @ilovemesomekillianjones @teamhook @superchocovian @itsfabianadocarmo @tiganasummertree @gingerchangeling @jrob64 @onceratheart18 @xhookswenchx @winterbaby89 @swampmedusa @ultraluckycatnd @dancingnancyy @love-with-you-i-have-everything @shireness-says @snowbellewells @hollyethecurious @ouatpost @daxx04 @the-darkdragonfly @donteattheappleshook

Belle is overwhelmed with responsibilities, both as newfound official owner of the shop, and with settling the Crocodile’s assets. They weren’t even bound together by law, but for whatever reason, she felt compelled to take care of these things.

“I suppose we should bury him,” she says over her coffee mug as she pours over pages of financial documents at Killian and Emma’s dining table.

Killian shrugs. “I suppose that’s a good way to prevent any foul odors,” he agrees, and she gives him a look that tells him he may have said the wrong thing. “And… of course, it’s the respectful thing to do.”

“Of course,” she says through a laugh and rolls her eyes. “I mean, I probably should've taken care of this already. It’s been a week since he passed, I just… it’s been strange.”

“I understand, love. You weren’t together but you still had feelings towards him. And as big a bastard as he was, he did love you.”

She presses her mouth together thoughtfully, nodding as she looks back down at her pages and takes another sip from her mug and he finishes up the dishes from their lunch. It’s perhaps the first time that he’s realized what this means: his enemy is dead. His life’s mission is complete.

He has a feeling that, were this to happen three years ago, he would have felt lost. He’s lived an unnaturally long life with one goal in mind, and with that goal met, he’s unsure what else he may have had to live for. Now, he has everything he needs.

It isn’t long before he hears the bounding steps of his toddler stomping down the stairs, one step at a time, and a nervous Emma behind her reminding her to be cautious.

During the last week, he’s noticed a new trend: Emma is constantly anxious about Corrine’s safety. She’s far more nervous about her being hurt while exploring her environment and learning new skills, and is always helicoptering over the child, hardly taking an eye off of her. It isn’t that he suspects that she distrusts him, but he’s certainly noticed that she almost never leaves their daughter alone, not even with her father.

“Hello my little love,” Killian says as she reaches the landing.

“Hi Captain,” she says, her tiny voice pronouncing her new word without a T.

“Who the blazes is teaching you these terms, my dear?” he asks, picking her up once his hand is dry and placing a kiss on her forehead.

“No know,” she responds with a shrug, although he doubts that to be true. One can only trust a two-year-old as far as one can throw them, especially when that child’s father is Captain Hook, and he’s nearly completely certain that she does know that Prince Charming is trying to mess with him.

“You’re far too smart for your own good, sweetheart.”

“Thank.”

Emma smiles softly as she rounds the corner, placing a hand on their daughter’s back and glancing up at Killian before moving towards the refrigerator.

“What would you like for lunch, smarty pants?” Emma asks Corrine, and she shrugs.

“Cheese,” she tells her mother, smiling a toothy grin at Killian and then poking his nose with her chubby finger.

“A grilled cheese? For Emma Swan’s daughter? Preposterous.”

Emma laughs, barely, and bumps his shoulder with her own, moving throughout the kitchen to get started on cooking as Killian continues to entertain the lass.

“Corrine, did you say hello to Belle?” Killian asks, and she turns in his arms and smiles sweetly.

“Hi.”

“Hello there,” Belle says with a smile, standing and gathering her files. “I actually think I should be going. I’ve got to make the arrangements for the burial.”

“Aye, lass.”

“Would you guys, um, are you planning on coming?”

Emma drops something behind him with a clatter, then lets out a hissed curse. When he turns, he sees her shoving a frying pan to the back of the stove and forcing the burner into the off position, holding her hand in front of her.

“Uh,” he says, placing Corrine down and moving towards Emma. “I’ll let you know,” he tells Belle as she makes her way out the door to leave.

“Momma’s okay?” Corrine asks, toddling over towards her.

“I’m fine,” she mumbles back, looking down and plastering on a fake smile. “Baby, go play in the living room while I make your lunch, okay?”

Corrine runs clumsily towards her small chest, opening it up and exclaiming excitedly when she sees some of her favorite stuffed toys. “Emma,” Killian finally says, moving in front of her and taking her burned hand.

“I’m fine,” she spits out, yanking her hand back and reaching for the pan again, replacing it on the burner and moving towards the refrigerator.

“You’re clearly not.”

“I said I’m fine.”

“Did you forget the conversation we had last week? I told you I’m here for you, love. You don’t have to bear—”

“Hook, I’m fine! Just leave it, would you?”

She hadn’t called him that since the curse was broken, but lately it’s been slipping from her lips far more frequently than he prefers. “Don't do that, Swan. Don’t put your walls back up; don’t shut me out.”

“I”m not.”

“You are. You’re scared about what’s going to happen with Regina and you’re trying to protect yourself, but in doing so, you’re closing yourself off from me.” She refuses to look him in the eye as she lets a pat of butter slide into the pan and tilts it so that it melts across the surface. “You’re doing it now.”

“What do you want me to say?” she mumbles as she places a slice of bread in the pan.

He takes her hand once she places a slice of cheese over the bread and covers it with another, pulling her away and forcing her to turn and face him. “You don't have to say anything. Just… I just want you to trust me like I trust you.”

She sighs, wriggling out of his hold and grabbing for a tool that she uses to flip the sandwich over. “Of course I trust you,” she says softly as he hands her Corrine’s plastic plate. She slides the hot sandwich onto it, slices it down the middle, and hands it back to him, turning away once again and taking the pan towards the sink.

He stands there expectantly, foolishly, for a moment before turning and walking towards the table, calling for Corrine as he places the plate in front of her chair. “Come, love,” he calls, and he hears her tumbling towards him. He hoists her into her chair and kisses the top of her head as she starts munching away.

Emma holds her burnt hand out of the running stream of water as she washes the pan vigorously. She isn’t one for cleaning, well, anything, so to see her so passionately doing so is throwing him for a loop.

Rather than trying to talk any more sense into her, he walks up behind her, resting his prosthetic on her hip and taking the pan from her hand to place it down in the sink so that he can hold her. He feels tension leaving her quickly as she settles her back against his chest before turning around and wrapping her arms around his middle, sighing.

He holds her tight, attempting to squeeze the anxiety and fear out of her but knowing it likely isn’t going to work like that. Instead he settles for telling her, “I’m here, love, always. We’ll get through this, I swear it.”

He hopes beyond hope that he’s being truthful to her.

~~~~

Later that night, when Corrine is safely tucked into her crib only after David helped Emma to lower the platform in an attempt to prevent her from escaping, Emma and Killian sit quietly on the loveseat as Henry takes up the entire couch. They had a film on, and although Killian finds them difficult to follow, he guesses that Henry is having a far worse time focusing based on the way he stares off at the ceiling for almost the entire picture. Eventually, he sits back up, his spine so straight that it looks uncomfortable, and announces, “I don’t wanna see my mom.”

Emma straightens too. “I know that, Henry. I told you I’m not gonna make you do anything you aren’t comfortable with.”

“I know she’s been asking for me.”

Emma squeezes Killian’s hand but won’t turn his way. He sighs and steps in. “Aye, lad, she has. But your mother has been very clear that that won't happen.”

“Hook’s right,” she says. “We aren't letting anything happen to you. You're old enough to make your own decisions about this stuff.”

The lad sighs, relaxing back into the couch a bit before speaking up again. “I feel bad, though. If she’s saying she wants to see me, maybe that would help her to fight the darkness.”

“Well, maybe that’s true, but it’s okay for you to set your own limits. Isn’t that what Dr. Hopper used to say?”

“Yeah. It’s just… why would she do this?” he asks softly, staring down at his hands resting on his knees. “Why would she let herself go back to being dark, after everything that happened when I was a kid?”

“The darkness came to her, Henry. She didn’t really have that much control over it,” Emma says, trailing off weakly at the end of her statement. He knows she’s blaming herself now for the position that Regina is in, and for Henry’s emotional turmoil.

“She’s gonna do something stupid. And dangerous.”

“Henry…”

“Mom, she did some really terrible stuff when she was the Evil Queen, and now she’s gone dark again. How can I trust that she won't try to hurt you like she did last time? Or me or Corrine?”

He feels her tense some more. “Kid, you shouldn’t have to worry about that.”

“But I do! It’s all I can think about!”

“We’re gonna take care of this! I told you that you don’t have to see her and I meant it. Nothing is gonna happen to you,” she tells him urgently, standing from the couch so quickly that Killian starts to tip over.

“But what about you? And everyone else I care about?”

“I’m gonna fix this,” she promises, her voice cracking. She moves towards Henry and pulls him into a tight hug which he returns in kind, the two of them standing still in the middle of the living room and seemingly blocking out the rest of the world.

Killian feels so helpless.

~~~~

“I don’t know what to do.”

“Swan,” he starts, moving towards the bed that she sits on heavily.

“If you tell me everything's gonna be okay, I think I’ll scream.”

He stops in his tracks, sighing as she flops backwards until her back hits the mattress and groans.

“Emma.”

“Hook, I can’t have this fight with you again!” she nearly shouts, thrusting her fingers into her hair.

“Who said we were fighting?”

She rolls over onto her stomach and presses herself up so that she’s sitting on her knees, staring him down with angry eyes. “You're going to tell me that this isn’t my fault and that we’ll get through this,” she says, irritation clear in her voice.

He steps towards the bed, standing closer to her and narrowing his eyes. “Suppose I am. Suppose I mean it.”

“It doesn’t help!” she says. “I can’t keep doing this. I can’t just sit around doing nothing while we wait for something to go wrong.”

“Swan, you're not doing nothing.”

“Why do you keep saying that?!”

“Why are you so upset with me?”

“I’m not!”

“Clearly you—” he’s interrupted. Her hands are around his neck and her mouth is on his with a forceful pressure that nearly knocks him off his feet. “Swan,” he tries, but she continues her attack on his lips.

“Stop talking,” she mumbles against him. “I don't want to hear anymore.”

“What do you want?”

She slows her movements of her lips along his only slightly, as if she’s considering his question, and in her pause, he leans them forward so that she falls back onto the mattress with him on top of them. She grunts, biting his lip fiercely in an angry response, and before he can steady himself on top of her, she’s pushing his shoulders and flipping them.

“You,” she growls at him before kissing him again. “I want to fuck you.”

Her words shoot through him as quickly as his blood does, coursing through his body in an icy heat. His hand finds her hip immediately, squeezing before he slaps her ass covered by her tight leggings. “You want it rough, love?”

“Yes,” she answers immediately.

“Well,” he murmurs as her mouth trails down his stubble covered chin and finds the juncture of his neck, sucking what he knows will become a bruise. “I’m happy to oblige.”

He knows what this is. He knows she’s seeking out control where she can and while she has so little of it. He normally takes the reins and revels in his ability to make her fall apart, so tonight, he’ll sit back and enjoy as she flips the script.

She’s quick in her work of undoing the buttons of his top, ripping it open forcefully and fully exposing his chest so that she can slide her lips down the expanse of flesh. She sucks another bruise into the skin just beside his nipple as her hands make quick work of the zip of his trousers. She pulls them down promptly once they’re undone, continuing the wet trail that her mouth leaves down his torso until she’s blowing hot breath against the fabric of his boxers just above his already-hard cock. She slides onto her knees on the floor before him, pulling the garment away, and takes him in her mouth almost immediately, never breaking eye from his. It’s perhaps the longest their eyes have maintained contact all week.

She sucks him expertly, swirling her tongue as her cheeks hollow and taking him down nearly to the base. He groans at her enthusiasm and she hums in response, the back of her throat vibrating against his throbbing tip. “Fuck, Emma,” he says, pulling at her hair lightly and iliciting a moan from her. He nearly loses himself at her response. “Come here, love.”

She hums again to question him, looking up as her tongue trails a thick line up his shaft and she sucks his tip once more. “Where?”

“If you don’t stop, I’m going to finish, and I won’t be able to fuck you.”

Releasing him with a pop, she presses herself up from her knees and begins to slide her leggings and knickers down her shapely legs. “Didn’t you hear what I said?” she asks as she pulls her top above her head and moves back towards him. She’s straddling his hips, his erection trapped between his stomach and her core, and the heat of her against him driving his mad. “I’m fucking you.”

“Bloody hell,” he breathes out as she grasps him and tucks him inside her. She moans, her hands sliding up his chest and taking his hand to place it on her breast still covered by her bra. He moves the fabric away as best he can through the distraction of having her around him, but he must be moving too slowly because she reaches around her back and unhooks it herself. As he squeezes again and runs his thumb along her nipple, she moans, tossing her head back so that her long hair almost tickles the tops of his thighs.

She rides him mercilessly, bouncing and and thrusting hard against him as she takes what she needs from him. He hopes it helps her; he could see her fear all week, her lack of control driving her to a state he hasn’t seen her in in quite some time. Her walls are coming back up, and watching it happen before him and being unable to prevent it hurts more than he knows what to do with.

“Fuck,” Emma says, reaching her hand to rub tight circles along her clit as she continues to squeeze him. “God, yes.”

“That’s it, darling. Take what you need from me,” he chokes out. He’s hardly even coherent, barely holding himself together as he prays for her quick release after the work she has put in on him moments ago. “I’m here, love, take what you need.”

“I need you,” she whimpers. Her voice is high and breathy as she collapses against him, one hand still trapped between them on her clit and the other wrapping around his neck. “I need,” she breathes, following it with nothing.

He chooses now to bend his knees and thrust his hips up into her finally, feeling her squeeze her arm harder around his neck and her core tighter against his cock. He groans into her neck, holding her hips so she can continue to move above him as he meets her with each thrust. “That’s so good, love, you feel so perfect. Such a good job for me, that’s it.”

“Killian,” she chokes out. “I— I lo—”

He thinks for sure that she’ll say it— he would’ve loved to hear it— but instead, she squeezes once more, choking out a cry that tells him she’s cascading off the cliff they worked towards together. As soon as she gives him permission through her own orgasm, he’s spilling himself inside her. She lets out a keening whimper as she comes down, her lips biting and kissing against his neck as she collapses.

He turns his head towards her’s, kissing her forehead and rubbing his bare arm up and down along her back as she comes back down. He hasn’t been with her with her walls this high since Neverland, and he isn’t sure how she’ll react to his attempts to hold her after such animalistic sex, but he chances it.

After he rolls them onto their sides, she holds on tightly to him but won’t move her head from its spot under his chin. He feels her shallow breaths hitting the skin of his collarbone, tickling the hairs gently as he runs his fingers along her spine. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she whispers, and he feels his heart squeezing painfully in his chest.

He pulls her impossibly closer to him and responds, “there isn’t anything wrong with you, my love,” and kisses the crown of her head once more.

“I don’t know why I can’t just…” she shrugs.

He thinks— he hopes— he knows what she means. She feels love for him, but can’t say the words and stay for the aftermath. Assuming this is correct, he says, “it’s okay. I love you enough for the both of us.”

He feels her burying her face further into his chest and she tightens her grip on his torso. “I feel it, I do. I just…”

“I know.”

He does know. He only hopes that he doesn’t soon get to a place where that isn’t enough anymore.

~~~~

They meet again at Granny’s in the morning, Ruby and Tink staying with Henry and Corrine despite the lass’s protests. She wants desperately to come with her parents, and her increased clinginess to the both of them worries Killian. He thinks it worries Emma more. Just one more straw that threatens to break the camel’s back that is Emma, he thinks.

Regina can hardly focus. She’s still going back and forth between talking to them as herself and the Dark One, and her quick flip from one personality to another startles them all. Today, she can’t seem to think about anything aside from Henry, and he can feel Emma’s tension from across the diner.

“Regina, we need a real plan.”

“I have a plan! It’s to see my son!”

“We need a plan for getting the darkness out of you. Have you found anything in your books or your vault?”

“Emma, I have to see him,” she pleads. “He’s the only thing that can keep me sane right now. Being the Dark One is so hard… I’m trying so hard not to give in, and he gives me strength to fight it.”

He watches as Emma blinks, sighing and letting her head fall forward at Regina’s words. She’s trying to appeal to Emma’s motherhood, and it isn’t fair. He wants to step in, but they asked to talk privately and he’s trying to respect that.

“I’m sorry, I really am,” Emma says softly. “It’s just not a good idea right now.”

“So Emma Swan finally has something over me and she’s milking it for all it’s worth, is that it?”

“Regina, it isn’t that. You know I want what’s best for Henry.”

“Then why the hell won’t you let him see me? Is it revenge over what happened last year that you want?”

“No!”

“You finally have a say in this and you can’t seem to let go.”

“Regina, Henry doesn’t want to see you,” Emma practically shouts. Killian’s blood runs cold.

“What?” Regina spits, leaning towards Emma threateningly. He stands from his stool at the counter and starts to make his way over to them.

“He’s scared! He spent so much of his life frightened of his mother being the Evil Queen and now he’s scared that you’re going to hurt someone he loves again!”

He places his hand on Emma’s shoulder and feels her tense up in response. Regina stands slowly, leering over Emma and smiling maliciously. “We’ll see.”

“What does that mean…?” Emma asks softly, leaning back against his hand and seemingly taking comfort in his presence.

“Well, Miss Swan, I suppose you’ll see.”

“Regina—”

“Just you wait, Miss Swan. You can’t keep my son from me forever.”

Before Emma can argue, she vanishes.

~~~~

“I need your help.”

“With what?”

“A plan. Don’t think I’ve forgotten your little scheme to get what you wanted last year.”

“So the new Dark One needs help from the old Dark One’s son?”

“Don’t flatter yourself. Your plan to make everyone forget and keep your family to yourself was perfect, aside from the fact that it may have taken Henry from me. I need your help to make that happen now.”

“How will you do it?”

“Allow me to show you.”

~~~~

Thoughts????? :)

Read Chapter 4

#the days we defend #walk with me #sequel #captain swan #captain swan fanfic #once upon a time #once upon a time fanfic #cs ff #cs ff au #ouat ff #ouat ff au #canon divergence #captain swan canon divergence #cs smut #smut #cs angst #angst #days we defend ff

42 notes · View notes

hookedonapirate · 4 years

Text

Beyond a Reasonable Doubt

Summary: Detective Killian Jones took an indefinite leave of absence from SBPD after his brother was murdered in the Line of Duty. Bitter and broken, he resides in a cabin on the beach when his brother's former partner, David Nolan brings him a case he knows the vengeful detective won’t be able to resist. A case involving Liam's killer.

Dr. Emma Swan makes all of her decisions like she operates on her patients—with care, competence and compassion. But when her colleague, Graham Humbert, is murdered in cold blood by the man who was freed because of a decision she made as a juror, she starts second-guessing herself. To make matters worse, her squeaky clean reputation is being questioned when she becomes a suspect for Graham’s murder.

There is one detective who believes she’s innocent, and he has a plan to protect Emma and find his brother's killer at the same time. When Killian finds himself caught between his duties to the SBPD and his need for vengeance, matters are only complicated by the feelings he develops for the woman he's supposed to protect.

He's impulsive and hot-tempered, and she's methodical and cool under pressure. Despite their differences, can they work together to bring the murderer to justice, or will the murderer get to them first?

A/N: Many thanks go to @ultraluckycatnd for her wonderful beta-ing skills and @onceuponaprincessworld as always for her encouragement and letting me bounce ideas off of her.

There was originally supposed to be more to this chapter but it ended up being really long so I split it up into two chapters. Hope you enjoy!

Rated: Explicit due to mature language, character death, violence, murder and smut. The scenes won’t be too graphic, but I’d rather overrate than underrate it.

Catch up: Pro I Ch 1 I Ch 2 I Ch 3 I Ch 4

Also available on: AO3 I FF.N

Chapter 5

Emma surveys the crowded sanctuary, feeling out of the loop and out of place as she is escorted down the aisle by a young usher. It’s been so long since she’s seen family in this capacity, she feels like an outsider. Being distant is her modus operandi. And being a surgeon makes it far too easy for her to use work as an excuse, because then she doesn’t have to socialize or express her feelings or discuss uneasy topics, such as a social life she doesn’t have. Talking about Graham used to be her social lubricant. When she talked about him, it took the focus off her, which she usually prefers, because she hates being in the spotlight; she hates having to talk about herself. While she is always in the literal spotlight of the operating room, she’s able to tune out that fact by focusing on her patients and the procedures. One of the many perks of being a doctor is that her job is to focus on her patients, and she’s good at that. The hospital is her comfort zone because nothing she does there is about her—it’s about her patients; it’s about helping them get better.

But that feeling of uneasiness had crept up inside her the instant she had entered the church with her adoptive mother. Ingrid had insisted Emma ride with her to the church since Emma's house was on the way. She was reluctant at first because she knew she wouldn’t be able to escape the reception early this way. Or if she ended up getting called into the hospital, she’d have to ask someone to leave and take her. But she also knew she couldn’t say no because it might hurt her adoptive mother’s feelings.

After Ingrid assured Emma she could use her vehicle if she got called in and that she would be able to hitch a ride home from Elsa, Emma couldn’t really think of any other excuses that wouldn’t make her intentions transparent. Besides, riding to the wedding with Ingrid gave them the opportunity to catch up. But it also gave Ingrid the opportunity to ask Emma how she was doing since her colleague had passed. And suddenly, what was once a social lubricant became an encumberment. It made Emma sad and teary-eyed and not want to be around people. Suddenly, talking about herself didn’t seem so bad after all.

They found Anna in her dressing room, which was pervaded with many laughs, a few tears and a bride who had worked herself into a frenzy of emotions. Nevertheless, Anna and Elsa expressed their deepest condolences for Graham and made a fuss over her and how she is dealing with his death. It’s a painful topic, but knowing the attention aimed at her would be short-lived, given that it's Anna and Kristoff's wedding day, gave Emma a bit of comfort. She'd returned to the sanctuary without Ingrid since her adoptive mother will be the one giving Anna away. After Anna and Elsa’s parents died, Ingrid raised them by herself. The younger sister was only eight at the time and lived under Ingrid’s roof before leaving for college. So Anna saw fit to be given away by the woman who had been more like her mother and father for ten years, rather than her aunt.

As Emma nears the front row of the sanctuary, her smile falters when her eyes stumble upon him. That damn detective, David Nolan.

When their eyes connect, she suddenly wants to disappear into a cloud of smoke or run away.

What the hell is he doing here?

Oh right, he was Elsa's late husband's best friend and work partner. Thankfully, when he interviewed her about Graham’s murder, he had skipped the pleasantries and had plunged right into the questions. He had seemed to be all business, which she appreciated, she really did. In fact, he reminded her of... well, herself. Very polite, but at the same time asking unpleasant questions. He was only trying to do his job, even if that meant making others feel exposed. Like homicide cases, surgeries are sometimes a lengthy, unpleasant process, but they’re an essential part of the job. So she understands David’s persistence and his need to get down to the nitty-gritty. But to make her a suspect for murder is preposterous! No, they had never met before Graham's murder, but David knew her family, and for him to point his finger at her, for him to think she could collaborate with a murderer left an unsavory taste in her mouth. She supposes his job requires him to separate personal feelings from work-related agendas—her job requires the same—but still, what he has on her is flimsy and pretty damn pathetic.

Emma drops down in the front pew with a humph. Normally she'd be opposed to sitting in the front, but since Ingrid will be seated next to her after she walks Anna down the aisle, and since Emma's not forced to look at the back of David's head like she would be if she sat in the back, she’s glad to sit in front.

After Kristoff’s parents are seated on the groom’s side of the sanctuary, Kristoff, the groomsmen and the ushers make their way to the front. Next comes the bridesmaids. Emma looks over to see Elsa, the maid of honor, walking down the aisle in her plum-colored gown, holding a matching bouquet and a big smile, her long, silver-blonde hair French braided in the back. Elsa takes her place next to a bridesmaid as her daughter trails after her, scattering purple rose petals along the bridal path. Emma smiles at Camila, who’s brown curls bounce around her shoulders as she walks. Her miniature ball gown makes her look like a princess as she makes her way toward her mother. When she reaches her, Elsa kisses her daughter’s forehead and prompts her to sit by her Aunt Emma.

The bridal procession song begins, and everyone stands for the bride’s grand entrance as she’s escorted by Ingrid, who has a proud smile on her face. Anna proceeds down the aisle in an elegant, off the shoulder gown with a wide neckline as she flashes a big grin, showing off her pearly white teeth. She looks every bit the blushing bride.

Emma still feels guilty for not attending Elsa’s wedding, even though it was several years ago. Or Liam’s funeral, even though her husband died three years ago. Actually, his death made her feel even more guilty. And she wishes she would’ve known him more, but alas, she had strayed away from family gatherings. She’s a terrible cousin. She’s always had trouble connecting with people, probably because when she was a kid, she never stayed anywhere long enough to connect with anyone. That is until Ingrid adopted her.

It took Emma a long time to fully feel accepted by Ingrid—to know she wouldn’t be sent off to another foster home. But Ingrid was a very kind and caring mother to her. Even so, Emma failed to develop the social skills her cousins had, even when they moved in with her and Ingrid three years later. Elsa is a little shier than her sister but still less so than Emma. The sisters had done their best to include her in activities and outings, and even though Emma had a close bond with Ingrid, she always felt like an outsider of the group. And the gap between her and the sisters gradually widened over the years.

After the conclusion of the ceremony, the front row is dismissed, and as Emma and Ingrid head down the aisle, she sees David once again, those familiar unpleasant feelings returning. Being the polite gentleman he is, David nods courteously at her, but she only scowls in return.

“Everything okay, Emma?” Ingrid asks, sensing how tense she is. Probably from the way Emma's jaw twitches as she glares at the detective.

Emma nods. “Yeah, I just recognize Mr. Nolan as the detective assigned to the case of Graham's murder. He questioned me and my other colleagues who were at the Rabbit Hole that night.”

“Ah, I see. Well, he's a good man. He and Liam worked together at the SBPD.”

“Yeah, that's what I've heard.”

“Speaking of Liam, I wonder if his brother is here,” Ingrid says, scanning the pews for him.

Emma averts her eyes from David, trying to rid the negative thoughts of the detective and the case and that creep, Neal Gold. She had thought about calling the police after the phone call Neal made. But she couldn’t get over the fact that David actually thought she, Elsa and Anna’s cousin and a doctor for Christ’s sake, could possibly be capable of murder, even if he didn’t think she had been the one wielding the knife.

She knew she should've driven her own car in case she felt the need to escape. Hopefully, David won't stoop so low to question her at her cousin's wedding.

“Oh, there he is,” Ingrid says, pulling Emma from her thoughts.

She looks over to see who Ingrid is waving to. And she guesses the man whose eyes light up as he looks their way and shoots up his hand in the center of the back pew, is him.

Emma loses a breath as she catches a glimpse of him, then quickly looks ahead and keeps moving. Two words come to mind as she makes her way to Ingrid's car.

Fucking gorgeous.

If only she had her phone in her hand when she saw him, because pulling it out of her clutch purse and stopping to point her phone at him would've been too obvious. It would've been just as bad as snapping a photo of him without knowing the flash was on. Like when Elsa had snapped a photo of Liam the night they met. Emma wasn't there, but she's heard the story several times over the years to know she doesn’t want to be caught in that type of situation.

~*~

Killian thought she was lovely when he saw her on the video footage of the interrogation room with its dim, unpleasant lighting, but bloody hell, she's much more gorgeous in person. He had shown up to the ceremony as late as he could possibly get away with and sat in the back to avoid attracting too much attention from the people who knew him—at least until Emma and Ingrid had left and headed for the country club.

He could only see the back of her head during the ceremony, but he’d seen enough to know she’s wearing a short, royal blue mermaid style dress that’s sleeveless and shows off her soft curves and bronzed shoulders and arms. Her hair is parted to the left and swept loosely into a swirl bun embellished with a blue flower, and her skin looks tanned, a contrast to the pale, creamy complexion on the video; she must've used a tanning bed or sunbathed on the beach. But he couldn’t get a good enough look to figure out which tanning method she’d used.

He'd been jealous of the usher who had the pleasure of escorting her down the aisle—had the pleasure of being so close to her, the young lad could probably smell whatever perfume she was wearing. Then Killian had chastised himself for having those thoughts. Emma's a subject of an investigation, regardless of whether or not he thinks she did anything wrong, and he has to think of her as such. He's not allowed to be jealous of ushers or anyone else who comes in contact with her. He has to admit he was very pleased she didn’t show up to the wedding with a date though.

When he arrives at the country club, he parks his truck and grabs the gift he got for Anna and Kristoff. He carries it in with him and leaves it on the table draped with white cloth. He signs the guest book and sees Emma Swan and Ingrid Swan's names above his. He hadn't expected Emma to ride with her adoptive mother. At first he worried it would interfere with his plans, but actually, if he plays his cards right, Emma not having a car to escape early in and unexpectedly might be to his advantage.

Killian sits with the Nolans, just as he would if he weren't helping David with the case. They don't dare breathe a word about work; they share some laughs and after the bridal party makes their entrance, the tables are dismissed one by one and Killian helps his nephews fill their plates with food from the buffet. He tries not to stare at Emma, but he can't help himself. Every now and then he steals a peek as she sits at a table across the room, conversing with Ingrid and other guests. She’s not facing him, but he has an excellent view of her toned, sexy legs, one crossed over the other.

The normal traditions are carried out through the reception—the speeches and toasts, the bride and groom’s first dance as husband and wife and the cake cutting, where Anna and Kristoff smash a piece in each other's face. While Killian chuckles along with the audience, he takes a sip of his water, nonchalantly glancing over at Emma once more. He can’t hear her laughing, but he can see her showing off those pearly white teeth, her cheeks swollen as she watches the scene unfold at the three-tiered cake.

After Emma finishes a slice, she grabs her glass of clear liquid and makes her way through the room, chatting with people he doesn't recognize, and that's when he decides to make his move.

He drains the rest of his water in one gulp before setting down his glass and rising from the empty table.

David had brought the boys each a slice of cake to keep them occupied while Killian planned his escape. And it worked like a charm. It didn't take long for Liam's hands to get covered in cake and frosting so Mary Margaret took him and his brother to the ladies' room to clean up. David is now off chatting with Anna, Kristoff and Elsa, keeping them distracted while Killian makes his way across the room. He sticks to the fringes of the crowd on the side opposite of the head table, lest someone from the bridal party wave him over, call out for him or approach him.

Killian hears the tail end of a conversation Emma is having with a couple before she backs away from them. He casually darts into her path as she's turning around and they crash into each other, her drink splashing over the front of her dress.

“Bloody hell, lass, I'm so sorry.”

She peers down at herself assessing the damage. When she looks up at him, at first she is stunned, as though he'd literally knocked the wind out of her. He’s pretty certain he has the same awestruck expression on his face because she’s even more beautiful up close. Her emerald green eyes sparkle under dark, elongated lashes that are framed by black eyeliner, and her lips are coated with shiny, rose pink lip gloss. And she smells incredible, like floral, citrus and cinnamon; all of his senses are tingling from her scent.

The only difference between their reactions is she recovers quickly and he can’t quite seem to.

“You got me all wet,” she mutters, her lovely facial features forming a scowl.

Killian flashes his flirtiest grin. “If I had a penny for every time a woman has said that to me…”

Just when he thought she couldn't glare at him any harder, she does. She glares at him so hard, he thinks she might burn a hole through his head.

“Here, let me get you another drink,” he says, taking the glass from her hand. When his fingers brush hers, his breath snags in his throat.

After recovering from that and the way his heart skips a beat, he raises his hand to signal a waitress who gives Emma a napkin and takes the glass away.

“What were you drinking, love?”

“Ice water, thank God,” she grumbles. “This dress is brand new.”

As she scrubs at the wet spot on her dress, he can’t help but notice the pale tan lines on her skin in the shape of a bikini top. The kind that ties around the back of the neck. And her tan looks too perfect and even to have been caused by the limited angle of the sun. He had envisioned Emma in only a bikini bottom while laying in a tanning bed, but he has to admit, the tan lines look pretty damn good on her. Now he’s wondering what the rest of her looks like.

Stop thinking of her like that, you wanker! he chides himself.

He clears his throat… and his thoughts. “Would you like something else, love?”

When she looks up again, she's still glaring at him. “No, just water. And I’m not your love.”

Killian arches a brow. “There's an open bar and a devilishly handsome gentleman offering to buy you a drink and that's what you choose?”

He's expecting her to laugh or even crack a smile like most women do when he comments on his own looks, but instead, she rolls her eyes. “I'm on call tonight. I don't even have a champagne toast when I'm on call.”

“A tall glass of water on the rocks it is then.” He'd been drinking water too, but for different reasons.

They walk to the bar together and he orders ice water for her and a rum for himself. As the bartender pours their drinks, Killian turns toward Emma, leaning an elbow on the bar counter. “So you're on call? What kind of work do you do?”

“I'm a doctor,” she answers simply as she crosses her arms and looks away like she's searching for the exit doors.

“Really? What kind of doctor?”

She reverts her gaze to his. “Medical.”

Killian shakes his head and snaps his fingers, disappointment clouding his features. “That's just my rotten luck.”

She arches a brow. “Oh? And why's that?”

“Because I'm as healthy as a horse.”

Killian can actually see the walls erecting around her like a fortress guarding a territory in warfare. He scratches behind his ear, thinking this might be more difficult than he thought. He only met her a couple of minutes ago but he can already tell she's a tough nut to crack. Which is fine. He loves a challenge.

When the bartender slides their drinks toward him, he grabs both glasses and hands Emma her water.

“Thanks.” She takes the proffered drink with a slight smile and he clinks his glass against hers.

“My pleasure,” he flashes a cheeky grin and imbibes his rum.

“Enjoy the rest of your evening.” As she brings the glass to her lips to take a sip, she turns and walks away so other guests can get to the bar.

He pretends not to recognize a brush-off when he receives one; he tries not to let it sting, but it kind of does. He quickly shakes it off and falls into step beside her. “Do you specialize?”

She sighs, most likely realizing she won't be able to get rid of him so easily. “I'm a general surgeon.”

He throws on his most charming smile. “Well, I have to say, I haven’t met a lot of surgeons—like I said, healthy as a horse—but you are the prettiest surgeon I’ve ever seen. In fact, I’m surprised the bride hasn’t kicked you out by now.”

She looks offended. “Kick me out? For what?”

“For being prettier than her.”

Emma’s cheeks turn as red as a tomato. And is that a hint of a smile he can detect? No, it can’t be. “You’re the cockiest, most self-assured man I’ve ever met. And believe me, I’ve met some doozies.” Oh, her smile is authentic all right.

He shrugs in disagreement. “I prefer dashing rapscallion.” He sticks out his hand. “Killian Jones. I’m the maid of honor’s—”

“Brother-in-law. I know.” She stares at his extended hand, leaving it hanging in the air, and he doubts she’ll shake it… until she finally does, clasping it firmly. Her skin is cold from the drink she was gripping tightly with both hands, but her skin is soft and he doesn’t want to let her hand go. But she releases his grip after a few seconds, leaving the ghost of her touch on his palm.

He steps into her space, his eyes scrolling down her body and up again before locking eyes with hers and tilting his head to the side, his voice low and husky as he speaks. “So you know who I am, and here you haven’t even told me your name, love.”

She scowls. “I told you not to call me that.”

“My apologies,” he says sincerely. “What should I call you, then?”

“Emma.”

His eyes light up with recognition, even though he already knows who she is. She doesn’t know that though. “Emma Swan?”

She narrows her eyes suspiciously. “That’s correct. So, you’ve heard of me, too?”

He nods. “You’re Anna and Elsa’s cousin.”

She lifts her brows, prompting him to expand.

“Your name has come up once or twice in conversation.”

“Really, and what have you heard?”

“Nothing much, only that we’ve almost met about a handful of times.”

Emma nods, biting her bottom lip, which he finds extremely adorable. “It’s one of the downfalls of being a surgeon. My profession makes it hard to have a social life.”

His eyes light up and a big smile lights up his face, though he doubts not having a social life is something she’s bitter about. There is a reason her cousins have referred to her as distant and aloof more than once. “So you’re saying missing out on the opportunity to meet me is a downfall?”

She shakes her head. “Actually no, I was just being polite. I’m kind of anti-social. But I’m guessing you already knew that.”

He nods, trying to hide the disappointment he feels after her blunt admission. “You’re right, I did. You’re quite perceptive,” he remarks before slugging down the last of his rum.

She shrugs. “I’m a doctor. I have to be able to sense when a patient isn't telling me something I should know before I go cutting them open.”

He nods in understanding, and they’re both silent as she looks around the room and slowly nurses her drink. After a moment, her eyes return to his, a solemn expression on her face.

“I’m sorry about your brother by the way. I didn’t know him well but I know he was a good man to Elsa.”

His features cloud with sadness, eyes darkening at the mention of Liam. “Thank you. He was a very good man.”

Emma suddenly narrows her eyes at him. “Aren’t you a detective like him?”

Killian nods and scratches behind his ear. “I was, but not anymore.” He hates lying to her, but he has to. At least for now. “After he died, I moved to Port Lavaca and got a job as a dockhand.”

She lifts a brow, amusement dancing in her eyes. “You went from being a detective to making ten dollars an hour scrubbing fish guts off of boats?”

"It's twelve dollars an hour, and I do more than clean boats," he corrects defensively.

She scoffs. "Oh sorry, I didn't mean to belittle a job a ten-year-old kid could do."

He frowns. “The pay may not be great but I get to live on the beach and inhale the salty sea air all day. It’s not a bad tradeoff, actually. Besides, if you think about it, cleaning up fish crap is not much different from the crap I cleaned up by working for the SBPD.”

She shrugs, unconvinced. “If you say so.” She takes another sip from her ice water, staring vacantly across the room as the dance floor fills up.

“Would you care to dance?”

She shakes her head. “I don’t dance.”

He nods, accepting another one of her brush-offs as his eyes circle the reception hall in search of his niece. “That’s okay, I’m sure my date will dance with me.”

When she whirls her head around to look at him and cock a brow, he can’t help but notice how much her face clouds with disappointment. “You came here with a date?”

“Is that so hard to believe, love?” He also doesn’t fail to notice she doesn’t correct her pet name this time.

“No, I’m sure there’s some poor woman out there either naive or desperate enough to fall for your charm.”

Killian brings his hand to his chest like he’d just been wounded. “Ouch, that hurts.” He spots his niece dancing with the bride and sets his glass on a vacant table. “I assure you, she is as smart as a whip. In fact, she’s probably smarter than anyone else her age.” He waves at Camila, getting her attention, and she happily rushes to him through the crowd. With a sidelong glance, he witnesses Emma’s eyes following his gaze to see who his date is.

She laughs upon realizing he was referring to Camila.

And it’s the first time he’s heard her laugh. Even though a crowd-pleasing song is pouring from the speakers, Emma’s laugh is music to his ears.

“Your niece is your date?”

“Aye.”

“Uncle Killy! Auntie Emma!” Camila chants, rushing over to them.

He extends his hand to her. “Would you care to dance, little love?”

She grins and nods, slipping her hand in his. He escorts her to the dancefloor, and she steps on each of his feet and takes her uncle’s offered hands as they move to the music.

As he dances with Camila, he does his best to avoid glancing over at Emma—he genuinely wants to spend time with his niece—but every now and then, his eyes make their way across the room.

~*~

Emma returns to the bar for a refill and plops down on a stool with a heavy sigh, her feet killing her from wearing these damn high heels. She really wishes she could drink alcohol right now because then she wouldn’t feel so nervous. She orders another water, and the bartender takes away her empty glass, giving her a fresh one. Her stomach is full of butterflies as she nurses her water and gazes over at Killian on the dance floor with Camila.

Emma doesn't know much about him, but she has learned a few things. One, his British accent does things to her when he speaks, and two, he’s much more handsome up close. She also knows he’s cocky and kind of obnoxious. Oh, and he’s ridiculously adorable with his five-year-old niece. If this weren’t her cousin's wedding and if she had her own vehicle, she would escape. Because he’s exactly the type of guy she tries to avoid at all costs—good looking and well aware of the effect he has on women. But there's also something very genuine about him. He’s honest and not afraid to say what he thinks. She appreciates that more than she’s afraid to admit.

After they had bumped into each other, she'd been apprehensive to talk to him because she'd seen him sitting with David and she knew through the grapevine he was a detective like Liam. She was afraid he was going to interrogate her about Graham's murder. But her guard lowered when he told her was no longer working for the SBPD and moved to Port Lavaca after his brother died. She knew he was telling the truth because she'd also heard through the grapevine he moved.

She sighs and averts her gaze from the dance floor and the ridiculously handsome man to take a sip of her drink. She thinks about throwing caution to the wind, carpe diem as they say, and going over to dance with him. But the thing is, she doesn't know how to dance.

Before she can ponder the thought any further, she sees out of the corner of her eye a figure claiming the stool next to her. She can feel their stare burning into her skin, and that overwhelming sense of paranoia that’s been eating away at her insides ever since the phone call from Gold takes over and she glances over to see who is sitting next to her. She exhales a deep breath of relief when she recognizes the man she thinks is one of Kristoff’s friends as he looks away from her to order a drink from the bartender.

Emma rests her elbows on the counter and buries her face in her hands, berating herself for being so paranoid. She keeps expecting Gold to show up at every turn; she keeps expecting to hear his voice on the other end of the line when she answers the phone, regardless of the number on her caller id, or lack thereof. She’s even afraid of being alone in her own freaking house!

She really needs to get a grip and stop letting that creep get to her, but at the same time she has good reason for being scared. In medical school, she had studied enough required psychology to know Gold is the most dangerous kind of criminal. He believes himself invincible and therefore will dare to do anything.

Emma lifts her head and looks over to catch the man next to her giving her a once over, his lips stretching into a coy grin. “Hi there. You’re Anna's cousin, right?”

Emma has to refrain from rolling her eyes as she steers her gaze away from him. “That’s right,” she mumbles, running a finger around the rim of her glass.

“I’m Hans.”

Out of the corner of her eye, she sees him extending his hand to her. She doesn’t move to shake it though.

“And you are?”

She turns her head, flashing him a fake smile. “Not interested.”

He chuckles as the bartender hands him his drink. “That’s an interesting name, Not Interested. You from around here?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“Hmmm, okay,” he says as he takes a swig of his drink.

At least he knows how to take a hint. She sighs in relief and continues sipping her water in silence.

“Well, Not Interested, I’m from out of town. I’m staying in a hotel room around the corner from here. If you get a little too tipsy from your drink, you’re more than welcome to crash in my room for the night.”

Emma clenches her jaw and is two seconds away from getting up from her seat and either giving him a piece of her mind or throwing her drink in his face. Just as she shifts to rise from her stool, a hand on her back makes her jump out of her skin and when she spins her head around to see whose hand she has to cut off, she loses her train of thought. And her breath.

“There you are, darling. I’ve been looking everywhere for you.” Killian leans in to kiss her cheek, and her breath catches when she feels those warm, luscious lips on her skin. “I should have known you’d be at the bar,” he chuckles playfully and glances at Hans while his thumb is idly stroking her back. “I can’t take her anywhere.” His spicy cologne hits her senses intensely, crippling her from head to toe when he reaches over her, extending his other hand to the stranger. “Killian Jones, Emma’s boyfriend. Nice to meet you.”

Tagging some people who have shown interest so far. If you would like to be tagged or untagged, please let me know.

@itsfabianadocarmo @snowbellewells @ilovemesomekillianjones @nikkiemms @teamhook @xhookswenchx @nikkiemms @xsajx @julesep3026 @hookedmom @biefaless @cluttermind @yasbio2015 @kmomof4 @lfh1226-linda @harshini01 @noensnaringnet @xarandomdreamx @onceuponaprincessworld @annastasiarinaldiva @royalswan @brustudyblog @officerrogers @gingerchangeling @melly326 @singersdd @mzbossyboots @unworried-corsair @iamemmaswanjones @authorarsinoe @kingofmyheart14 @nightskylover @jamif @resident-of-storybrooke @iam2307 @winterbaby89 @chinawoodfan @mormonkryptonite @ultraluckycatnd @captainswan-shipper88 @killianswanjones @bethdacattfm @andiirivera

#cs ff #captain swan #beyond a reasonable doubt #my fic

49 notes · View notes

dirtyfilthy · 3 years

Text

The Betrayal Of Chelsea Manning By The Coward Adrian Lamo

I have only participated in “cancel culture” once that I can remember. Once, over the broad course of my life, and that was when Adrian Lamo sold Chelsea Manning out to the authorities. Motherfucker has the sheer gall to call himself a hacker, and then rats someone out — not because of his principles, but from a constant desire for pure narcissistic supply -- and all this from a position of trust no less…

I was real angry, and I wanted to put the boot in, any way I could. There was a special circle of hell reserved for people like Adrian Lamo… and as it would turn out, he was already in it.

Amongst petty vendettas like stuffing his wikipedia page with all the well referenced dirt I could dig up, along the way, and kind of by-the-by, I ended up doing a lot of research on the guy, and then, well, the picture of Lamo that emerged…

Jesus.

He’s been a hardcore benzo addict since his twenties. If you know what to look for you can tell in some of his interviews, slurring his words and looking very spacey. He never really had a real job, never broke into the industry he was aways on the fringes of. It’s kinda crazy, if you search for “homeless hacker Adrian Lamo” you can still see what the mass media thought of him before he turned in Chelsea.

He’d kind of weaselled his way into popular consciousness by being a shameless self-promoter, and then managing to get caught in that spectacular “rebellious teenage hacker” vs. “huge faceless corporation” way that tends to capture people’s imagination.

There were whole articles about him in Wired. Multiple in fact. Here’s one of earliest from 2004 (unfortunately now behind a paywall), “New York Times vs The Homeless Hacker”. The first few lines can still give you the gist, however

A self-styled security expert and serial self-promoter, Adrian Lamo made headlines as a grayhat hacker. Then the Gray Lady came down on his head. Not long ago Adrian Lamo was exploring an abandoned gypsum processing plant in West Philadelphia with two friends, when a police cruiser drove slowly by. Lamo’s friends were high on methamphetamines…

https://www.wired.com/2004/04/hacker-5/

Even during this phase of his life, a lot of people in the scene didn’t like him. At least, there were people complaining on hacker boards about him stealing exploits and then burning them for the publicity. In the end he got off with probation and home detention, and that was the end of blatantly hacking into shit. Any more and he would certainly end up in prison. Attitudes were changing, the authorities had stopped seeing hacking as just high-spirited teenage hijinks. and the increasingly severe penalties could land you some serious time.

After this, he just sorted floated around. He never got job in the industry like the rest of us, and I suspect he may have been basically unemployable for one reason or another. The next time he popped up in my news feed was in 2010 with a strange article from ex-hacker turned journalist and friend of Lamo’s,, Kevin Poulsen — “Ex-Hacker Adrian Lamo Institutionalized, Diagnosed with Asperger’s”

The first paragraph or so reads:

Last month Adrian Lamo, a man once hunted by the FBI, did something contrary to his nature. He says he picked up a payphone outside a Northern California supermarket and called the cops.

Someone, Lamo says, had grabbed his backpack containing the prescription anti-depressants he'd been on since 2004, the year he pleaded guilty to hacking The New York Times. He wanted his medication back. But when the police arrived at the Safeway parking lot it was Lamo, not the missing backpack, that interested them. Something about his halting, monotone speech, perhaps slowed by his medication, got the officers' attention

— (https://www.wired.com/2010/05/lamo/)

The article claimed Lamo had been arrested for acting strangely and then institutionalised, basically claiming the police had arrested him because he was autistic. At the time, I didn’t really give this a second thought, “oh well, ho-hum”. As itt turned out, this was a case of the most spectacular kind of “spin” I think I’ve ever seen; the only place the article actually intersected with general consensual reality was in stating Lamo had been arrested and placed on psychiatric hold.

The real story, which is entirely far more pathetic, was that Lamo’s family had become worried about his benzo use (“prescription anti-depressants”) and had cut him off. He totally lost the plot at this point and stormed out of house. Concerned about his mental state, and with fears for his physical safety, it was actually his own family that called the police to try and find him.

When confronted about this fairly massive discrepancy, Lamo claimed he hadn’t exactly “lied” as such, and had simply withheld some facts due to personal privacy concerns.

It was at this point I finally began to see the whole tattered trajectory of Lamo’s entire life — trace the greasy path of his rainbow with my fingertips, and watch as the once bright twine became increasing gray and frayed as each thread began to curve back towards it’s inevitable impact with the earth, when, at which point, everything important would begin to totally unravel around him.

At his core, Adrian Lamo was a narcissist, and so Adrian Lamo absolutely believed in the Adrian Lamo narrative, as only a narcissist can. Near of beginning of his tale, this was easy to do. He was a wandering Daoist sage, a renegade techno-monk character in a Neal Stephenson cyberpunk novella, and anytime he wanted to see his own reflection he could simply look in any of the major newspapers.

After his arrest and release, the rest of the world moved on. His peers all settled down to well-paid industry gigs, and you couldn’t just pop the New York Times through an open proxy any longer — well, at least: not most of time, anyway. His own sword, never the exactly the sharpest in the first place, was beginning to show some signs of a serious structural rust.

Without the constant assurance of people telling his own story back at him, what was he exactly? What did the mirror portray to him now? An unemployed, semi-homeless drug addict, a hacker who couldn’t hack his way out of wet paper back with pick axe, the tired punch line to any number of bad jokes...

Of course, the many similarities to my own life were not exactly lost on me. I was basically a case of being a few near misses and unlucky hits away from sitting in his exact position. I had made the transition to an industry career successfully, but I was still a drug addict with mental heath issues. I had gone through my own narcissistic stage when I was younger, but thankfully grew out of it, the old moons no longer pulled on my tides the way they used to.

The essential Lamo pattern had began to emerge. Still chasing the same bright stars that had long since sunk beneath the horizon line of the ocean; Lamo would begin to feel irrelevant — Lamo would get then his name in the media in some fashion. A momentary peace was then achieved, then came a brief period of post-orgasmic. cosmic serenity.

But of course, the wheel of karma will not stop spinning for anyone, and so, soon enough and all-to-quickly, the entire process of personal renewal, would have to, you know….. begin anew.

A few other case studies were observed. An unreleased, permanently unfinished documentary featuring Lamo was mysteriously leaked on the internet. Of course, Lamo himself had leaked it. And there was always appearing on various morning television shows, Good Morning America, Fox News & the like.

But then the mother of all opportunities just dropped into his lap.

Chelsea Manning needed someone to talk to.

Chelsea knew Lamo was Bi, so he was at least in the LGBT community. Adrian was a hacker too. He’d fought against the system in his day, he was certainly someone who would “get it”, she was very sure of this. And when she did reach out, he was indeed very sympathetic. Honestly, it seemed like he really cared. Just a genuine human being, reaching out across the vast emotional void to provide a sense of empathy to someone who really, really needed it right now..

He was very sympathetic when Chelsea told him all about her struggles with gender identity, and he was very sympathetic when she said she was leaking gigabytes of information to Wikileaks…. But behind his sunglasses, Lamo eyes had already morphed into a marquee LED matrix endlessly scrolling his own name. Think of the news coverage!

This was big. This was very big.

It would, in fact, turn out to be fucking huge. Of course, within in the hacker scene, and to a certain extent, even outside it, everyone just fucking loathed him now. Eventually even the news moved on, nobody wanted any more interviews, and in the end, when everything has already been all said and done: you are ultimately left with only yourself….

… a pathetic drug addict. Of course, I have to keep telling myself that one point of intersection does not an entire venn diagram or an actual equality make. But I can’t shake the feeling that, perhaps, maybe we weren’t really all that different. Maybe my own betrayals have had the simple luck of being a lot less public.

Perhaps my own sins were just as ugly, but far less ambitious.

Adrian Lamo died alone, from a drug overdose, in a private unit in an aged care facility in Wichita, Kansas. He was 37 years old. An autopsy showed his kidneys were already failing.

I guess Sartre got it wrong. Hell isn’t other people, it’s being left totally alone, with nothing else around but the tedious company of your own terrible self, and of course, the fucker won’t stop talking...

So obviously there was nothing more I could do to hurt Adrian Lamo, nothing that Adrian Lamo hadn’t done already. He had long since locked himself away in a prison cell of his own making. I do wonder if maybe one too many silent 3am’s hadn’t come crawling around the clock face when he was there & awake to witness it, lying in bed & staring at the ceiling and trying not to think about things.

Like I’m doing.

Shit, I hope don’t go out that way.

#adrian lamo #chelsea manning #nonfiction #creative nonfiction

1 note · View note

stahlop · 4 years

Text

Once Upon a Time 2x21 “Second Star to the Right” Review

Reviews 1x01 1x02 1x03 1x04 1x05 1x06 1x07 1x08 1x09 1x10 1x11 1x12 1x13 1x14 1x15 1x16 1x17 1x18 1x19 1x20 1x21 1x22 2x01 2x02 2x03 2x04 2x05 2x06 2x07 2x08 2x09 2x10 2x11 2x12 2x13 2x14 2x15 2x16 2x17 2x18 2x19 2x20

Oh, man! What the hell just got unleashed on us! Bae lived with the Darlings and got taken to Neverland and found himself about Hook’s ship! Tamara killed Neal! Regina actually killed Greg’s father! And this is all going to be tied up in the next episode?

Summary: After going through the portal, Bae finds himself in Victorian London and ends up living with the Darling family. David and Mary Margaret go to extremes to find Regina, while Emma is still convinced that Tamara is up to no good.

Opening: Big Ben turning to 8:15

New Characters:

Wendy Darling: She’s not afraid of Bae when she first meets him. She comes after him with a statue before realizing that he’s just hungry. She starts hiding Bae in a crawl space in the wall of their nursery. Bae asks if her parents suspect and she makes the statement that all kids think is true, ‘they’re grown ups, they can’t see anything that’s not right in front of them.’ Which of course is when her parents show up and demand to know who Bae is. When they find out he’s an orphan, Mrs. Darling invites him to stay with them. Bae wakes up that night while Wendy is waiting for the Shadow to come. She and her brothers are very excited about the Shadow coming. She tells Bae that the Shadow started appearing around the same time Bae appeared and it’s so wonderful because it can change shape and travel between worlds. And it’s so wonderful because it has magic. This instantly sets off Bae’s alarms, since he came to this land to get away from magic. He tells them not to let the Shadow in and Wendy is disappointed. John accuses him of not believing, but he tells them he comes from a land that is full of magic, which makes Wendy excited again. Wendy, when the boy from the magic land tells you to stay away from magic, listen! Bae tells Wendy and her brothers that magic destroyed his family and Wendy finally looks chagrined about entertaining the idea of going with the Shadow. Bae makes Wendy promise not to let the Shadow in, and she unhappily agrees. The next day Wendy is sitting out by that damn open window (someone needs to teach her to respect an open window!). the Shadow comes back and Wendy is as excited about it as she always is. She claims that this magic is different, it’s from a place called Neverland where there are no grown ups and you can fly. Bae tries to keep her in the house, but she’s determined to go. She comes back the next morning and while she’s telling Bae about all the wondrous things you can just see that she is trying not to cry because her magical adventure was not all she thought it was going to be. She tells Bae that once nightfalls you can hear all the children crying for their parents and they aren’t allowed to leave. It’s called Neverland because once you step foot on the soil you can never leave. She’s in tears now. Then Wendy reveals that the Shadow wanted a boy and that’s why she was allowed to go home, but he’ll be back for one of her brothers. Wendy finally admits that she should have listened to Bae about magic. That night the Darling children booby trap the nursery so the Shadow can’t take John or Michael. Ok, I get the lights and the matches, because that can make a shadow disappear, but what exactly were they hoping to accomplish with jacks on the windowsill? Seriously? It’s a shadow, not a burglar. The Shadow gets through all their traps, because it’s a shadow, and Bae herds everyone into the crawl space, except for Michael. Wendy’s freaking out because the Shadow’s going after her brother, but then Bae offers to go instead, and Wendy’s even more upset because this is all her fault (yes, it definitely is, listen to Bae next time). So, yeah, Wendy made some bad decisions and now Bae is off to Neverland.

Character Observations:

Bae/Neal: First of all, I loved how seamlessly they transitioned from Bae falling through the portal in the previously ons straight into the opening scene. Also, the actor playing Bae’s voice has changed since last season, so there’s that. So, Bae pulls himself up on the other side of the portal and immediately starts calling for his Papa :(. And then, he almost gets run over by a horse and carriage, but jumps back in front of a sign that says Kensington Gardens. And then, if you still weren’t sure where we were, Big Ben starts ringing. Bae has found himself in merry ole London, England, and from the shadows of the people we see, Victorian London, England. Six months later Bae is living on the streets of London and looking like Gavroche from Les Miserables. He’s not having much luck finding food until he sees a window open at a very nice house. He sees some fresh bread laid out on a table and just goes to town on it and stuffing some in his pockets. And then a big St. Bernard starts barking at him from under the table and Wendy comes out. But once she discovers he’s hungry she gives him more food. And apparently lets him live in the crawl space in the nursery. That seems really cramped. The Darling parents discover him and Bae is quick to tell them both his parents are dead and he can’t go back to the workhouses. Mrs. Darling takes pity on him and lets him stay. Bae is so excited to have found such a loving family. Wendy wakes up Bae that night to inform him about the Shadow that’s been visiting them. At first, Bae is entranced by Wendy’s wonder and excitement about the Shadow, until she mentions magic. Then he is all business, making sure they don’t open the window for the Shadow. John accuses him of not believing in magic, but Bae tells them he came from another realm where magic ruined his life and it’s not to be trusted. He makes Wendy promise not to go with the Shadow. But, she doesn’t listen. Bae awakens a few nights later (he has a bed now), and Wendy is waiting for the Shadow. Bae tries with all his might to keep her in the nursery, but she’s convinced that Neverland will be wonderful and she goes off with the Shadow. Bae has slept on the windowsill (of an open window that he literally could have rolled off of) and is there when Wendy returns. She tells him of all the wonderful things in Neverland. He questions why she came home then. She tells him of the children crying for their parents and how the Shadow doesn’t let them leave once they’ve touched the soil. She tells Bae that the Shadow wants a boy and is coming for one of her brothers. Bae is determined not to let magic destroy another family. They set the nursery up to ward off the Shadow, but it doesn’t do any good. Apparently the Shadow can blow out candles and open locked windows. Michael doesn’t make it into the crawl space where they’re all hiding so Bae goes out and offers himself to the Shadow as long as the Shadow promises never to bother the Darlings again. He thanks Wendy for letting him be a part of her family and the Shadow takes him. the Shadow flies Bae through the London rooftops (and Bae looks like he’s in danger of hitting those chimney’s more than once). Once they start getting close to Neverland, Bae can hear the children on the island crying and he remembers Wendy’s words about not being able to leave, so he struggles against the Shadow’s grip. He remembers the matches in his robe pocket and lights one and that finally gets the Shadow to let go of him and he falls into the ocean. The Shadow can’t find him in the water and gives up (pretty easily). Luckily, he’s pulled out by one Captain Hook and aboard the Jolly Roger. And that’s the story of how Neal met Captain Hook!

At six in the morning, Tamara is going out for a run, so that wakes up Neal. He then hears a fight happening outside and hears his father’s voice. Neal breaks up the fight and then berates Gold for essentially ignoring him since he’s been in town since the whole reason for the curse was so he could find him. Neal is upset that Gold hasn’t even met Tamara yet, but Gold thinks Neal is still hung up on Emma so she’s not important. Neal tells him he hasn’t changed and he’s not worth his time. Gold wonders why he’s still in town then. Neal has to remind him of Henry, and then tells Gold to stay away from both of them. Emma comes by Neal’s room to search it. She thinks she has something to do with Regina’s disappearance and Neal can’t believe Emma is still on the Tamara is evil kick. Emma finds sand in the closet after Neal tells her that Tamara likes to run in the woods. She thinks that Tamara is lying to him about other things if she can lie about this so easily. Neal doesn’t think it’s a big deal. Neal and Emma are on the beach searching for Tamara. Neal thinks Emma is letting her emotions get in the way and that’s why she’s trying to break up him and Tamara. Emma tells him that it hurt that he didn’t come after her in jail and that he found Tallahassee with someone else. Neal is about to defend himself again when Tamara runs up. After she runs off Emma decides she needs to search somewhere else, but Neal finally, FINALLY apologizes for letting August convince him to send her to jail. And he’s sorry that he never searched for her because he was afraid she’d never forgive him since he never forgave himself. This is completely contradictory to what he told August in Selfless, Brave, and True where he was worried about Emma breaking the curse and his father finding him. Neal tells her there wasn’t a day that went by that he didn’t regret leaving her. Well, that may be true, but you were too much of a coward to find her again because you were afraid of your father. Too bad you’re exactly like him. Look, it’s great that Neal finally apologized to Emma, because he needed to do that, but the fact of the matter is that he never would have come back to find her if she hadn’t found him first. He knew the curse was broken and he was still too pissed at his father, 100 and some odd years later, to go find Emma in Storybrooke. So, I still can’t forgive him, but I guess I can understand why Emma might. After a phone call from David, Emma and Neal go into the cannery looking for Tamara and Regina. Emma wants to make sure Neal has her back. He tells her he does if it turns out to be Tamara, even though he doubts that it is. David radios Emma that they found Regina with Greg and Neal immediately does an ‘I told you so’, but then Tamara comes up behind Emma and knocks her down with a pipe. She takes Emma’s gun and points it at Neal and goes on about how magic is a poison and needs to be gotten rid of. Neal seems to be focused more on the fact that she lied to him rather than the gun pointed at him! He finally gets her to admit that she’s been lying to him from the beginning and she never loved him. Neal is devastated, but tells Tamara he can’t let her leave SB, so she shoots him! Neal is just like WTF! But he still doesn’t realize how serious she is until she points the gun at his head. Luckily, Emma, finally recovered from the pipe to the back, kicks the gun out of Tamara’s hand to save Neal. Emma and Tamara fight and Neal isn’t doing so well. Emma gets the upper hand and then Tamara throws a bean and both Emma and Neal are pretty much screwed. Emma is holding Neal by his hand, but he tells her that she won’t be able to hold on to what she’s holding onto and him at the same time. He insists she let him go even if it means his death. He doesn’t want Henry to grow up without parents like they did. Emma tells him she loves him. He says it back and then lets go. Ok, I have to assume that all this is said in the heat of the moment because just five minutes ago Neal was in love with Tamara and accusing Emma of being jealous. Neal thought he was going to die so that’s why he tells Emma he loves her back. Unless he’s still loved her all these years. But, it’s also been 11 years since they’ve seen each other and they are two totally different people so Neal could be in love with 17-year-old Emma, but he doesn’t know 28-year-old Emma at all. He lets go of Emma’s hand (a nice juxtaposition to when his father let go of his hand in Desperate Souls) and falls into the portal, most likely to his death. RIP Neal.

Gold: He is continuing to be a complete asshole. Honestly, what the hell is Belle going to think when she gets her memories back? The guy that I love decided to be everything I hate just because my alter ego decided she liked power better than being good. I have no idea if they’re having sex, but would it be considered consensual, and how would Belle feel about it since Gold is pretty much using her body just because the person in it looks the same? The whole thing is repugnant. But onto the actual plot. Neal interrupts Gold telling Whale to kiss his boot for daring to look at Lacey. Neal stops him from kicking Whale’s face in and Gold is pissed. He sends Lacey off to the pawn shop while Neal berates his father for spending all this time looking for him and now barely acknowledging his existence. True statement. Neal gets hurt that his father isn’t even trying to have a relationship with him and that he’s never even attempted to meet his fiance, Tamara. Gold tells him that he’s obviously still in love with Emma. Neal tells him he hasn’t changed and he’s not worth his time. Gold fights back saying that Neal is still in town for a reason and Neal reminds him of Henry, and that’s the only reason he’s still there. Gold at least looks upset about that. Did Gold really forget about Henry being Neal’s son and that’s the reason he’s in town, or is he so self-centered that he thought Neal was there for him and Emma? Like, I don’t even understand what’s going on in his head anymore. David and Mary Margaret go to cash in the favor Gold owes David by having him help them find Regina. Gold happens to have one of Regina’s tears which will help them find Regina by combining it with one of Mary Margaret’s tears and dropping it in her eye. Weird. Lacey comes out after they leave seeing that he really can do magic and is impressed. She wonders why he never told her about this. Gold tells her about magic coming with a price and how it drives people away. Lacey tells him he’s hanging with the wrong kind of people then. She wants to see what else he can do, so he makes a necklace appear out of thin air and gives it to her. Lacey asks if he can make her immortal like him, he tells her yes. Okay, Gold, you know Belle wouldn’t want that at all. He tells her about the prophecy that foretells his undoing. He tells her that it’s complicated when she tells him to get rid of whomever will be his undoing. She thought nothing stood in his way. And then he pulls her to him in what would be a really sexy and seductive mood if it were any other two people in this situation, and he tells her he is that man. Gross.

Emma: She’s on the hunt for Regina. She, David, Mary Margaret, and Henry realize she’s missing, and most likely not by her own volition since her office is unlocked and the security system has been overridden. David suggests that she took a portal back to the EF, but Emma, rightly so, says she wouldn’t leave without Henry. David and Mary Margaret think Gold overpowered Regina, but Emma says he’s too preoccupied with Lacey (I’m glad someone in this town notices these things). Emma is convinced it’s Tamara again. David and Mary Margaret don’t think it is and think she needs to get off that train. Emma points out that Tamara came to town the same day August was killed, but David and Mary Margaret still aren’t on the same train as her. Emma tells her parents to go to Gold and find something that will help them and she’ll look at Tamara’s room again. Emma tells Neal she’s there to search his room for real this time. Um, that usually requires a warrant, but small town and emergency, I’ll allow it. She tells Neal that Regina is missing and Neal can’t believe she suspects Tamara. Emma finds sand on the floor of their closet and since Neal tells her Tamara runs in the woods that’s proof in her eyes that Tamara is a liar and has probably lied to Neal about other things. I mean, it’s true, but it’s also a big stretch. They go looking for Tamara on the beach and Neal thinks that Emma is jealous. Emma asks him what he wants to hear. How it killed her that he never came looking for her? That he found Tallahassee with someone else. Thankfully, Emma knows how to hide her emotions well because she plays this off as if it doesn’t bother her much when we know she’s constructed high walls around herself so that it will never happen again. Tamara interrupts their moment with her jog and Emma starts to realize that maybe she is jealous since Tamara kind of just proved that she was jogging along the beach and Emma doesn’t pick up a single lie . God dammit, Emma! You really need to get that super power under control. Neal gives a big apology speech that Emma doesn’t want to hear at first, but by the end she’s kind of okay with it and starts looking at Neal like he might not actually be a villain in her story. But I still think she’ll never be able to forgive him completely because he completely changed the trajectory of her life and not in a good way. Later on, Emma and Neal are walking along the docks when David calls her and tells her about Mary Margaret smelling sardines, Emma figures out pretty quickly that Tamara played them because the cannery is right there. Emma questions Neal’s loyalty when he comes with her into the cannery, but he says if Tamara is the bad guy he’s got her. She and David almost shoot each other, but he gives her a radio and they go their separate ways to look for Regina. When David and Mary Margaret find Regina and Greg, they radio Emma and tell her. She’s shocked that it’s Greg, and Neal basically tells her ‘I told you so’, except that Tamara then bashes Emma with a pipe and takes her gun. Emma wakes up in time to save Neal from getting shot a second time and fights with Tamara. She gets the gun but Tamara has a magic bean and she uses it to create a portal so she can escape. Emma is holding onto a pipe for dear life so she doesn’t go down the portal. Neal eventually helps her down and they’re about to leave when the portal opens up a little bigger and Emma is once again holding on for dear life while trying to keep Neal from going down the portal. He wants her to let him go, but she knows he’ll die because he’s been shot. He goes for the Henry angle so she’ll let him go, but she can’t let him go. She doesn’t want him out of her life again. She tells him she needs him and loves him. Neal tells her he loves her too and then lets go. The portal closes and Emma is left on the cannery floor with a big hole beneath her. Emma is devastated. Now, I know this seems like Emma has been jealous and that she wants to be with Neal again, but I disagree. I think this is Emma trying to be a comfort to him because she knows he’s going to die. She does care for him, but he was engaged to Tamara not five minutes ago. He barely apologized to her. This is teenaged Emma telling him these things, not the Emma of now. Present day Emma would never lay her heart out like that unless she knew it wasn’t going anywhere. And yes she’s crying over him, but he was still a big part of her life and he’s Henry’s father so regardless of her feelings for him now, she’s still mourning the part he played in her life overall and whatever the future may have brought them (though I still don’t believe it would have been an intimate relationship). Emma comes back to the loft completely shell-shocked and informs her parents that Neal is dead and Tamara killed him. David tries to comfort her and Emma doesn’t know how she’s going to tell Henry. David gives her the most fatherly kiss and this is just a real good father/daughter moment right here.

Mary Margaret/David: They annoy me a lot in this episode. David wonders why Regina would need to override her alarm code. Well, David, you’re supposedly an officer of the law, figure it out. Luckily, Emma is there to help him out. Mary Margaret is at least smart enough to figure out someone broke in and stole the beans, but when Emma thinks it’s Tamara, she gives that condescending mom stare to her. The ‘we’ve already talked about this, honey, and you were wrong’. They think Gold took Regina, but Emma’s apparently the only one observing the town nowadays, because she knows he only has eyes for Lacey. David and Mary Margaret both think Emma is wrong about Tamara and don’t want to go down the wrong path looking for Regina. Emma tells them to go to Gold and find something to help them find Regina while she looks into Tamara again. They go to Gold and remind him that he owes them a favor, so he reluctantly helps them find Regina. He wants to know why they want to help her, and Mary Margaret says she owes Regina after killing Cora. Interesting choice of words instead of saying she feels guilty. Gold wants a tear to mix with Regina’s, that he so happens to have, and Mary Margaret quickly thinks of something to make herself cry. Gold mixes it and tells them to drop it in Mary Margaret’s eye and she’ll basically see and feel everything Regina does. David tells Mary Margaret she doesn’t have to do this, but she thinks if she helps find Regina it will help heal her darkened heart. David just looks at her like there isn’t anyone more good and selfless in the world, and he drops the potion into her eye. At first it looks like it isn’t going to work, but then Regina starts getting electrocuted and Mary Margaret starts convulsing. David isn’t sure what to do, but he’s freaking out about it. Mary Margaret seems to pass out for a minute, and when she comes to she tells David that it was the worst pain she’d ever felt and that Regina is strapped down and powerless to fight back. Mary Margaret couldn’t tell where Regina was, just that she was cold and that it smelled like sardines. David relays this to Emma who figures out Regina is at the cannery and tells David and Mary Margaret to meet her there. David and Emma almost shoot each other because apparently David can’t sneak into someone’s supposed secret hideout without making a ton of noise. They split up and eventually find Regina with Greg. David and Mary Margaret catch Greg about to kill Regina and David shoots the machine that was administering the electricity (why didn’t he shoot Greg instead? At least shoot him in the leg or something so he couldn’t run off?). Greg manages to get away (because David is incompetent), and Mary Margaret won’t let him go after Greg because Regina needs medical help from Mother Superior. Um, can’t you just call for her and she’ll appear? Isn’t that how it worked back in the EF? Isn’t that what basically happened in Selfless, Brave, and True when they needed her to help August? Why can’t Mary Margaret stay with Regina and call Mother Superior (hell, call her on the phone and get her to come over) while David goes after Greg? Anyway, at least he’s smart enough to tell Emma that it’s Greg they caught with Regina. Mary Margaret and David have brought Regina to the loft and Mother Superior uses her magic to remove the cuff and heal her (again, why couldn’t this have happened at the warehouse?). Emma comes in and they immediately know that something is wrong. They are in shock when she tells them Neal is gone and ‘she’ killed them (they know it’s Tamara, she doesn’t have to clarify, they know). David does the fatherly thing and comforts Emma, while Mary Margaret is watching over Regina. She is shocked that David and Mary Margaret saved her. David says they’re family, regardless. Regina is worried because Greg and Tamara still have ‘it’, and Mary Margaret has the good sense to be worried about what it is they have. They are appalled about the fail-safe. Especially since her plan was to take Henry with her to the EF and leave them all to die. But they have bigger things to worry about since Regina no longer has the trigger.

Regina: She is bound to a medical slab. We start with her trying to see where Hook stands on this whole matter. He just wants to kill Gold and Regina scoffs that he doesn’t even know who he’s working for. Greg comes in with his electrocution machine and she sarcastically asks if it’s part of his mission, but he’s clear that this is personal. Greg starts putting electrodes all over Regina and it’s clear he wants answers about his father, and he’s willing to hurt her to get them. She’s adamant that he left town, but Greg still doesn’t believe her. He turns the machine on and Regina is her normal, sarcastic self, asking if the machine is supposed to frighten her. But you can see that she’s nervous when Greg starts attaching the wires to the electrodes. He once again asks where his father is. Regina rolls her eyes and gets electrocuted for it. This goes on for a while. Tamara comes in after distracting Neal and Emma and Regina calls them fools who go around stealing magic. Greg tells her they’re there to destroy magic and Regina looks confused. I don’t blame her because she told Henry in Welcome to Storybrooke that magic can’t be destroyed when he tried to blow up the well. But I’m sure Greg and Tamara wouldn’t believe her anyway. Regina laughs at Tamara when she tells her that they’re there to cleanse the world of magic. She thinks it’s ridiculous that the two of them could destroy magic. But she sure as hell gets nervous when Greg tells her there’s more of them all over the world. Regina tells them that it’s not going to work, but Greg tells her it’s been done before, that Storybrooke is not the first bit of magic to cross over. Later on, Tamara sees Emma and Neal on the monitors and tells Greg they have to go. Regina is not looking so smug anymore. Her eyes are red and teary and she looks like she’s praying Emma finds her soon. Greg puts the dial up to a 9 and you can see Regina visibly wince before he even asks her where his father is for the last time. She finally tells him before he can electrocute her at such a high level. She killed his father the minute he left town and buried him at the campsite. She says this with such venom in her voice. I suspect she’s pretty sure she’s going to die at this point. Much like when she said she told the kingdom she regretted not being more evil when Snow and Charming almost executed her in The Cricket Game. She tells Greg to go ahead and kill her. She just wanted to see the look on his face when she told him. So he electrocutes her at a level 9! He does it two more times before David finally he comes in and shoots the machine. Regina is pretty much out of it by this point, so she doesn’t get to see David and Mary Margaret rescue her. She wakes up in their loft and is astounded that they saved her. They tell her she’s family. She tells them Greg and Tamara have the fail-safe. They can’t believe she was going to kill everyone with it. Regina’s pissed they were going to abandon her in Storybrooke, because that’s the same thing as killing everyone. Again, Regina is playing the victim when she was going to do something much worse. But that’s all to say that she doesn’t have it anymore and that’s a big problem.

Greg/Tamara: Tamara pretends to be training for a marathon so she can meet with Greg in secret at the cannery. Tamara shows Greg the magic portal beans that she found in Regina’s office. Greg gets jealous that she knows what they are because Neal told her. She tells him that as soon as this is all over she’ll be taking off the engagement ring. Greg gives her the fail-safe diamond they found on Regina and she says she’ll send it over to the Home Office to look at. Greg sets Regina up to be electrocuted so he can get information about his father from her. Regina tells him he left town, but Greg refuses to believe that his father never came to find him. He wants Hook to lend him a hand (with his good hand), but Hook isn’t so much into torturing the Evil Queen as he is killing Rumplestiltskin. He tells Greg to find him when that part of the plan is happening. Greg asks Regina where his father is and when she refuses to answer him, she gets her first dose of electrocution. Tamara ‘runs into’ Neal and Emma on the beach to throw them off the track. She tells Greg they believed her. Greg ups the dial and electrocutes Regina some more. She calls them fools for stealing magic but Tamara tells her that’s not what they’re doing. She talks about magic being unholy and needing to be cleansed from the earth, and it feels like Tamara is talking about The Crusades or something. Tamara and Greg are pretty confident that they will do what they’ve set out to do. Regina doesn’t believe the two of them can destroy magic, but Greg informs her that there are more of them everywhere. After he ran away he talked about the magic he saw and magic believers found him, believers that don’t believe magic belongs in their world and are willing to do something about it. They also sound like they’re in a religious cult. Regina tells them destroying magic won’t work, but Greg tells them they’ve done it before. He tells her they are there to stop magic and electrocutes her again. Tamara sees Emma and Neal on the cannery monitors and tells Greg they have to go. Greg still hasn’t got the information about his father. He and Tamara argue, and he tells her they wouldn’t even know about Storybrooke if it wasn’t for his father, so Tamara tells him to meet her later while she runs off. Greg turns the dial up to 9 and this scares Regina enough that she finally tells him that his father is dead and she buried him near their campsite. Greg doesn’t believe her and electrocutes her again. Greg tells Regina she’s never going to hurt anyone ever again, but David comes at that moment and shoots the machine. Greg runs off because Mary Margaret is insistent that they save Regina instead of go after the guy who tried to kill her. David tells Emma that it was Greg, but then Tamara hits Emma with a pipe. Neal focuses more on the fact that Tamara was lying to him this whole time rather than the fact that she just hit Emma with a pipe! She grabs Emma’s gun and tells him that she is working with Greg and they’re there to get rid of magic, something he should be familiar with. Neal again is stuck on the lying part. He finally puts together that their whole relationship was a lie. I see how Tamara managed to dupe him for so long; he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed. Tamara tries to get him to understand that it was her job, and he finally realizes she never loved him (dude, get off this track), and that’s when he tells her he can’t let her leave. She gives him a warning and then shoots him about one second after that. Cold-blooded. Damn! She’s about to shoot him point blank in the head when Emma kicks the gun away. Tamara and Emma fight (and Tamara’s a good fighter, definitely trained) and Emma thinks she has the upper hand when she gets her gun back, but Tamara pulls out one of the beans and throws it at them and runs off. Greg is digging at the campsite and finds his father’s skull. He’s completely devastated. Tamara finds Greg reburying his father and tells him she’s sorry. She tells him the Home Office has gotten back to them about the diamond. She tells him he’ll never believe what it does, and that the Home Office wants them to move to the next phase of their plan. Greg is shocked that they want them to move so quickly, and even Tamara is a little wary. They have to blow Storybrooke off the map.

Questions:

Why does it look like Gold, Lacey, and Whale are having their fight after a night of drinking? Are they just leaving The Rabbit Hole at six in the morning?

How does Tamara send over the fail-safe diamond to the Home Office and get the information back all in one day? Does she actually send it to them, or do they just know what it is from a picture?

How long was Bae in the crawl space before the Darlings discovered him?

Is the Shadow there for Bae since it started coming to the Darlings window at the same time he arrived?

How did magic kill Bae’s mother? Didn’t Rumplestiltskin just tell Bae she ran away and died? Or was kidnapped by pirates and died? (I know he told Bae she died)

Really David, this is how you want to use your favor? To find Regina?

How the hell does Gold have a tear from Regina?

Why doesn’t Gold make a locator potion to find Regina? Why do they have to use a potion that makes Mary Margaret see, feel, smell, touch, and hear what Regina is going through

What magic did Greg see in Storybrooke as a child? His father mentioned that it seemed as if the town had dropped on top of them, but all Greg saw was a storm. And then he couldn’t find Storybrooke when he brought the cops, but that could have been the hysteria and fear that just prevented him from finding it. So really, Greg never originally saw any magic. He just knew that Regina tried to steal him from his father.

How does Wendy know so much about where the Shadow is from? It doesn’t talk. How does she know it’s realm is different from Bae’s and that you can fly and all that?

Ok, I get that Neal happened to be with Emma when she went to go search the cannery, but why is David bringing Mary Margaret along on police business when someone potentially dangerous is there?

Why is Mary Margaret still wearing her coat when she’s caring for Regina? Or did she change out of the blue sweater and is now wearing a trench top?

How did Greg happen to find the exact spot his father was buried in? Besides not having been there for 28 years, they had a pretty big camping area when they were there.

How did Tamara find Greg where his father had been buried? They were supposed to meet at a rendezvous point.

How do the folks at the ‘Home Office’ know what the fail-safe is? Is there a Curses 101 book that they can look these things up in?

Observations:

Kensington Gardens is the setting of the prequel to Peter Pan, titled Peter Pan in Kensington Gardens. It is also where a statue of Peter Pan is currently located.

Gold tells Whale to kiss his boot and Neal says he’s surprised he didn’t turn him into a snail. Rumplestiltskin did this to the man who tried to take Bae in Desperate Souls when he became the Dark One.

Neal doesn’t think it’s odd that Tamara takes several hours a day to go running since she’s training for a marathon. So, I looked it up and Google says that you should cap a run at three and a half hours while training, so I guess it’s not that odd.

Bae goes from sleeping on the floor to having a bed within a day, unless it takes the Shadow a lot longer to come back.

There is no mention of Peter Pan on Neverland.

Gold gives Lacey the same necklace Belle dreamed of him giving her in The Crocodile.

Emma tells David and Mary Margaret to look for Regina in the cannery basement, but there are windows all aroundwhere Greg and Regina are with the sunlight shining in when they are found.

Big Ben is at 8:15 when the Shadow takes Bae past it.

The Shadow takes Bae toward the second star to the right.

Yeah, Tamara hitting Emma with the pipe would definitely have broken her neck. No way she could have survived that.

Timeline Issues:

I’m pretty sure we’ve established that Gold is a few hundred years old. He became the Dark One when Bae was 14. So, let’s say he’s been the Dark One for 200 years. If it is currently 2013 in the timeline, and since we’ve seen that the EF and our realm run concurrently, that should mean that it was at least 1813 when Bae dropped into London. Except that the story Peter Pan was published in 1904, which means Bae would have had to have dropped into the Darling’s lives at least a few years before the book was published. Let’s put Bae coming to our world in 1902. That would mean it would have been 111 years since he dropped through the portal. Now, he may feel like he’s been around longer since Wendy says time works differently in Neverland, and it would also account for how long Hook has been around, but that doesn’t explain why Gold says he’s a few hundred years old when he’d really only be around 160 or so (and no, his time stuck during the curse doesn’t count toward his age).

So Greg and Tamara know that the diamond is part of the fail-safe, which means they are going to try and destroy Storybrooke themselves. Hopefully, Emma finds them before that happens. I’m looking forward to Bae and Hook discovering that they have a connection with Milah. Tamara and Greg keep referencing the Home Office, which seems pretty ominous. And we saw the true version of Wendy in Neverland, and it was not all it was cracked up to be. Neal is gone, but at least Emma got some closure before it happened. The final episode is next!!!!

Please leave comments and reblog! Let me know if you’d like to be tagged in future reviews.

@searchingwardrobes @thisonesatellite @justbecauseyoubelievesomething @laschatzi @profdanglaisstuff @mariakov81 @lfh1226-linda

#once upon a time #once upon a time review #once upon a time rewatch #once upon a time 2x21 #once upon a time second start to the right

16 notes · View notes

mariequitecontrarie · 5 years

Text

Love Beyond the Sea: Chap 23

Summary: Belle sells the necklace. Then it’s time to say goodbye. A/N: In which the hero and the heroine have to act super dumb before they can realize they are acting super dumb. I promise this is going somewhere happy. In the next chapter. Thanks to the brilliant @galactic-pirates for the help! Art by the wonderful @rumpledspinster! On AO3 Previous Chapters

“You will be my souvenir in American summer when all I can think about are Parisian springs.” – Lori Jenessa Nelson Detective Nolan cleared his throat. “You’re certain this is what you want to do, Belle?”

“Yes.” She looked up from the pristine glass and mahogany jewelry cases filled with sparkling gemstones, each more dazzling than the last. “I’m sure.”

“And Luc? He doesn’t suspect?”

“I don’t think so.” She forced a smile, the upward turn of her lips pulling the apples of her cheeks taut. “He trusts me.” Even though you’re lying. About the necklace. About your feelings. Guilt sank its claws into her once again and she shook it off. It wasn’t her place to decide when the ends justified the means but a lie to protect him was better than watching him go to prison for theft.

David patted her on the shoulder. “Smartest decision he’s ever made, I’d say.” The reassurance surprised her. It was a comforting touch, the kind of affection she imagined she might receive from an older brother, had she not been an only child. Tears sprang to her eyes. She blinked them away before David could see.

He was being kind. No doubt he thought she was a little unhinged, but Belle didn’t care. He had been surprised when she had called to outline her plan but, as he obviously cared for Luc himself, he had made all the arrangements. Besides, being concerned with appearances wasn’t relevant today. Doing the right thing was what mattered.

“Well, then.” He leaned an elbow against the jewelry case. One of the sales clerks gave a disapproving tsk at his slouch. Smiling sheepishly, he straightened and rubbed the smudged glass with the edge of his shirt sleeve, then passed her a crisp white envelope. “There is your egg.”

“Nest egg.” She giggled, glad for a small reason to laugh, and slid the envelope into her handbag.

“Oui. It was wired from your bank in Toronto this morning. Cartier has agreed to issue the check in exchange and I will see to the safe return of the necklace. The illusion is complete.”

Today she had turned over her life savings—all the seed money she had been saving for her dream home with Victor—to be given to Luc in exchange for the stolen diamonds. Buying a house no longer interested her. Not unless she could share it with Luc. But that was a fantasy. He claimed not to remember the night they’d spent together, and he’d given her no other indication that anything more than friendship between them was welcome or even possible. She supposed that meant she didn’t fit into his life with his son.

Belle looked over David’s shoulder and out the large glass storefront windows, relieved to see no sign of Luc watching the exchange of jewels and money from across the street. The brilliant, sunny day and crystal blue skies left no shadows in which to lurk. Perhaps he’d taken her suggestion and gone for a walk while she pretended to negotiate with the store.

“Thank you, Detective.” Even though she trusted David to take care of the stolen property without Luc getting in trouble, turning the necklace into the police still felt like a betrayal. At least Luc wouldn’t return to Paris empty-handed. Whether he knew it or not, while he planted his vineyard and restored his home, he would carry a little piece of her with him. The thought wrapped around her like a warm hug.

“And the other matter?” she asked. “His son?”

As a point of negotiation for returning the necklace, she had asked David to make arrangements for Luc’s ex-wife, Milah, to release Neal into his father’s care for good. It wasn’t that she doubted Luc’s ability to retrieve his son on his own. Rather, she feared the courage to see it through would desert him when it mattered most. What if Luc fretted that the money wasn’t enough to provide for Neal? What if he told himself he had to wait until he was more settled to bring him home?

“You drive a hard bargain, Mademoiselle.” David inclined his head. “Everything is arranged for Neal to come home to his papa. Thanks to a mutual acquaintance, Milah has received a lucrative offer to work on a cruise ship as a lounge singer. As you can imagine, she jumped at the offer. I am only sorry I didn’t think to intervene for Luc sooner.”

“The job offer was your doing, I’m sure, Detective.” Belle resisted the urge to roll her eyes. The idea that a mother would release her son for so little pained her. But Milah’s carelessness meant Neal coming home to Luc, where he truly belonged. Back in the arms of the father who loved him; who had lied and stolen for a chance to rebuild their life together. “You must call me David. We are friends now, yes? Bonded over our mutual friendship with Luc.”

“A friend would be lovely.” As alone in the world as she felt right now, Belle could use all the friends she could get.

“And as your friend, may I say, you look very much the part of a Frenchwoman today.” Their bargaining behind them, David relaxed, his serious expression melting into a boyish grin as he took in her leather skirt, tweed jacket, and raspberry-colored beret. She even had a bit of lace peeking out from the top of her slim blue sweater. “Seems such a shame for you to return to America. Perhaps you could be happy somewhere else?”

She pressed her lips together. If she started talking about the last several days—the passion for adventure she had found, the breathtaking wonder of this country, the incredible, smart, gifted, funny, handsome man she’d fallen in love with—every emotion she was holding in check would rise to the surface and spill over. And if she started crying, she wouldn’t be able to stop.

She glanced behind the jewelry counter at the necklace. It was laid out on a blue velvet cushion, waiting to be cleaned and shipped back to the United States. “Out of curiosity, how much is it worth?”

“I would say over $200,000.”

“Wow.” In comparison, the check in her handbag was a paltry sum. She hoped Luc wouldn’t be too disappointed.

“Belle, why are you doing this? You’re not with Luc. You will probably never see him again.”

“I don’t know.” She managed to meet his gaze as she lied, but his blazing eyes pierced her heart, seeing far more than she wanted him to.

David hummed. “Compassion like yours is a rare quality. But why not tell him the truth?”

The truth. It was more complicated than even she understood. How could she have misread the situation so badly? The way Luc had held her and kissed her, she was certain their night together was more than sex. Her heart ached with the knowledge he didn’t remember making love to her, but it didn’t change her feelings. If he had forgotten what happened between them, there was a reason. Perhaps it was fate demanding yet another laugh. If nothing else, this trip had shown her that even the best laid plans sometimes didn’t work out.

But she wouldn’t have traded a moment of her time with Luc. She would carry her love for him as long as she lived.

“He doesn’t owe me anything.” She shrugged. “He deserves a fresh start, a happy beginning.”

Until yesterday, she’d believed boarding the airplane back in Toronto was the bravest thing she had ever done. Now she realized having the courage to love someone—unconditionally, sacrificially, expecting nothing in return—was the true mark of a hero.

And so was having the strength to free the person you love to find their own happiness, even if it wasn’t with you.

Back at the hotel, Luc sat on the sofa reexamining the check in his hands. The amount, $89,236.42, was far less than he’d been expecting. The opulent diamond necklace was worth more—at least $50,000 more—than the value of the paper he held. According to Belle, the store manager had stuck his nose in the air, making noises about the diamonds being flawed. Bah. He knew they were exceptional jewels and had done the research to prove it. But what could he do? Explain that he had sent his lovely young American friend to sell diamonds he’d stolen from Greene’s jewelry store in Kansas?

Belle was in the bathroom now, gathering her things and packing them into the small suitcase he’d purchased for her with his father’s stolen credit card.

Leaning his head back against the cushion, he slouched on the couch and attempted to understand himself. It wasn’t like him to leave business matters to chance or to allow someone else to do for him what he could so capably do on his own. He should have sold the necklace himself rather than relying on Belle, with her sweet beauty and even sweeter nature. It had seemed so important to her to complete the sale on his behalf. She had wanted to help him, and being allied with someone was an odd yet refreshing change from his go-it-alone existence. Other than David, no one had ever wanted to help him. Until Belle came along.

She emerged from the bathroom wearing the emerald green dress from the other day, and carrying a small bag of toiletries. She looked fresh and pretty with her hair framing her face in loose waves. He studied her, trying to memorize every detail and feature from the way she walked to the shape of her lips to the tilt of her head when she looked at him like he was insane.

“I’m sorry again,” she said, “about the necklace.”

He tucked the check in the pocket of his suit coat and stood. “Don’t be. It’s alright.”

“It is?”

He couldn’t help but smile at the hopeful note in her voice. “Yes. It will be a little longer, perhaps four or five years, until we can produce a decent bottle of wine. But it is enough to buy the land and the house, and to secure my son’s future.”

“The stone cottage,” she whispered. A dreamy smile lit her face. “Neal will be coming home, won’t he? I’m so happy for you.”

“I owe it all to you.” He swallowed thickly and took her free hand. “I’m sorry things did not work out with Victor.”

“It was my choice and surprisingly, I’m not unhappy about it. If we had gotten back together, things would have ended sooner or later. He loves Ruby. And I think she loves him. I wish them nothing but happiness.”

And you, Belle? he wanted to ask. What about your happiness?

He squeezed her fingers. “Perhaps you did not win your love back, but you won your heart back. When the time is right, you can give it away to someone worthy; someone who will protect it and cherish you.”

Whoever that someone was would need to be an incredible human being to deserve her. He only wished he qualified. But how could she love him? Or want a life with him? She should have romance and adventure. He wouldn’t saddle her with a lowly country life of processing grapes and eking out a vintner’s living, not to mention instant motherhood to a twelve-year-old boy. He and Neal were a package deal.

He looked down. Not only was he still holding her hand, he was squeezing the pulp out of her poor fingers. He stepped back, released her.

She turned toward the bed and busied herself with folding and unfolding her small pile of clothes. Finally, she zipped up the little blue suitcase and lowered it to the floor. “I suppose I should get going. I have a flight to catch.”

It had to happen. He knew it. He was prepared to let her go. “You must be relieved to have this ordeal over. Now you can get back to your work, your life.”

“My life.” She seemed to draw out the phrase slowly, questioning. “I wish…” she trailed off.

“I know.” His tongue felt two sizes too large for his mouth.

“Anyway,” she said gaily, “I’m getting to be an old pro at these airplanes.” She held up her new passport, courtesy of Regina Mills at the American Embassy. She had owed him a favor, and calling it in for Belle was the least he could do. “Too bad you won’t be there to distract me during takeoff.”

He chuckled fondly, remembering her nervousness, and how he had loosened her tongue on the plane to Paris with tiny bottles of airline-issue liquor and endless questions. He couldn’t reconcile that cautious, frustrated young miss with the confident woman standing in front of him. Belle was fearless.

It was time to say adieu before he said too much. He grasped her shoulders, drew her close. She was close enough for him to kiss, but he could still see her face. Her blue eyes were wide and wet. His voice was rough. “You are my angel of luck. None of this…I couldn’t have done this without you.”

“Yes, you could have. You can do anything.” The declaration was steely, determined.

Her unfailing faith in him was astounding. “You really believe that, don’t you?”

He cupped her cheeks, drawing his thumbs down the fine bones of her face, the tips of his fingers tracing her softness. “Bon chance, Belle French.”

She raised her mouth to his, her eyelashes fluttering, and he nearly gave in and kissed that perfect pout. At the last moment, he lifted his chin and kissed her forehead. And stepped away.

He couldn’t be what she needed, and all the wishing in the world wouldn’t change the facts: he was too afraid to ask her to stay.

###

#rumbelle #rumbelle fic #david nolan #romantic comedy #mr. gold x belle #love beyond the sea #mqc writes

20 notes · View notes

lilacmoon83 · 5 years

Text

Love in a Ruined World

Also on Fanfiction.net and A03

Chapter 6: Reflection

David found her in the woods, near the Toll Bridge, assaulting a poor tree with arrows, as it became the target of her frustration. He watched her for a few moments, simply marveling at her, as he often did. Watching her was one of his favorite past times, after all. And he loved watching her practice with a bow. Her fluid grace and prowess as a warrior was awe-inspiring to him. Her fury was as beautiful as she was. He was glad she was finally allowing herself to let out her frustration and anger at the woman essentially responsible for keeping them apart for twenty-eight years.

Snow was always so quick to blame herself for everything, but even she had a breaking point and Regina's attitude had finally pushed her too far.

As usual, he waited in the wings with quiet patience, until she was ready to talk and be comforted.

She finally ran out of arrows and instead of going to retrieve them, she leaned against a tree and sighed deeply. She turned her head and met his eyes, as he waited patiently against his own tree.

"How long have you been there?" she asked.

"A while," he replied, as he opened his arms to her and she rushed into his embrace, finally accepting that she not only needed comforting, but deserved it.

"I didn't mean to lose my temper like that. I don't like doing that," she mentioned.

"I know...but she deserved it, you know. You are far more tolerant of her than she deserves," he replied. She sniffed.

"Most of the time, I don't let it get to me. But then Emma's ex just walked back into her life and it just hit me again. She went through so much, David...and she went through it alone!" Snow cried, as he cradled her in his arms.

"And all because of a secret I told. Our daughter grew up alone...because of me," Snow fretted.

"No...she grew up alone, because Regina cast a curse and we had no choice," he corrected.

"I'm not sure Emma feels that way," Snow muttered.

"I won't let you keep blaming yourself for this. You did not kill Daniel," he reminded.

"But he was killed because of me," she reminded back. But he shook his head.

"You don't really know that for sure. What if Cora already suspected? I mean...you told me that Daniel was their stable boy and taught Regina how to ride. They spent years together...I doubt there was no way that Cora didn't already suspect. She just used you to confirm it," he surmised. Snow thought about that for a moment and knew it was entirely possible.

"Why can't Regina see that?" Snow asked. He kissed her forehead.

"She doesn't want to, Snow. It's easier for her to hate you than to hate her own mother. But I'm tired of the way she treats you. It's time that she owns her part in all of this. Because of this curse, we're in a world that has seen the apocalypse and we may never get home. She's destroyed lives, but if she can finally let this go, then I know we can too. Because despite all this, we're still a family and we can be happy. At least, I know you and I can. Despite all this, I'm happy because I finally have the love of my life back," he said, as she looked up at him with tears shining in her eyes. He leaned down and kissed her tenderly.

"And we have our daughter and our grandson. We may have lost a lot of time, but it doesn't mean we don't have a future...as broken as this world is," he reminded. She nodded and wiped her tears away.

"We still need to tell Henry...I don't want him to be mad at Emma. She shouldn't have lied, but she's already been through so much," Snow lamented and then realized something else.

"And we need to tell Gold...he has no idea his son is actually alive," she added. He sighed.

"We can tell Henry together, but maybe I should pull Gold aside and tell him myself, father to father. We seem to connect in that way," he suggested. She nodded and leaned her head against his shoulder, as they spent a few moments there together. They came down to the Toll Bridge a lot. It was their special place and they had even discovered a cave beneath it where they stored some blankets and pillows. They had actually spent nights there together when they needed to get away for a bit. It was a place that just made them feel whole and connected even more than usual.

"We should go...but maybe we can come back out here later?" she asked. He smiled and caressed her beautiful face.

"That sounds like exactly what we need," he agreed, as they trekked back to town with their arms around each other. Snow still had a lot of feelings and anger she needed to sort out when it came to Regina, but for now, they needed to focus on their daughter and grandson's needs. And that was helping them deal with the reappearance of Emma's ex, Henry's biological father, and the ties to Rumpelstiltskin that he brought with him.

~*~

Neal looked around at the cluster of people that were essentially living at what was town hall in this town at one time. On the way to the town hall, he had taken the opportunity to observe the town that had apparently been hidden from the world for twenty-eight years and the place where his father had been living. If he was being honest with himself, he was a tiny bit impressed that his father had wanted a curse to come to a land without any magic and agreed to live without it. Then again, he had to wipe his own memory to live without magic for all those years, but still. It took his father out of every comfort zone that he had. It didn't lessen his anger though that he essentially had to ruin Emma's life to get to this land though and all supposedly for him. He didn't like that at all. Emma and her parents hadn't deserved to pay the price for his father's mistakes with him and he was going to make sure his father knew exactly how he felt.

Still, he wasn't entirely unhappy to be there. Just months ago, he would have laughed at the notion that he would have willingly sought his father out. But the apocalypse had changed everything and made him realize that he truly had nothing without family; even a family such as his. So when Emma told him that he had a son, he felt a myriad of emotions. Sadness that he didn't know about him and wasn't there. Repeating his father's mistakes was not something that settled well with him at all, even if he did it unknowingly. He also felt anger at August and hoped he survived the culling that had befallen this world, just so he could punch him in the face. There was no way that August hadn't known that Emma was pregnant and conveniently chose not to tell him. He was also excited and nervous at the same time to meet his son. He was a father and that was some heavy stuff. He had more family than he realized and it had all been in this quaint little town that had never seen an outsider until the world had ended.

So here he was, reunited with Emma and moment away from seeing a father that he had not seen in over three hundred years. He doubted Emma was ever going to forgive him. He just hoped his son did. As for his father...he honestly didn't know how that was going to go and decided that he wouldn't know until he saw him. He braced himself, as he followed Emma further into the building.

~*~

When they had returned to the town hall, Snow and Regina had exchanged cool glances, but said little about their earlier blowout. Snow informed her, much to her shock, that one of the outsiders that had come to town was in fact Henry's biological father. And that Emma's ex was actually Baelfire, Rumpelstiltskin's lost son; a fact that none of them knew, not even Emma, until now. And David had a feeling that not even Rumple knew about his connection to Henry. But the three adults managed to put their feelings aside and merged together to tell Henry.

Under normal circumstances, Regina might have tried to capitalize on Emma's blunder and use it against her when it came to Henry. But the last few months had changed her, despite her early reverting to her old ways and lashing out at Snow. Her step-daughter was always an easy target for her pain and Regina knew how wrong that was. Especially since she had learned that hurting Snow also hurt Henry and she hated that. She could even see the disappointment in his eyes when he looked at her and she knew she deserved it for lashing out at Snow. Still...her pain was not easily forgotten and in many ways had been compounded by the sheer and utter loss of this world. This was supposed to have been her happy ending. The curse breaking had been bad enough, but living in a lost, barren world was not her idea of happiness either. This existence was not what she had wanted for Henry, but all those comforts were gone. Magic was never coming back and with that, she realized that all they had was family. And even she had to give Snow credit for even considering her family after all she had done. Maybe she and David were only doing it for Henry, but it was still to their credit, as much as she hated their goodness at times.

Right now, breaking this news to Henry as gently as possible was key and that meant helping him to understand why Emma hadn't been entirely honest. She had a part in that too, after all, as much she didn't want to admit it. She was part of the reason why Emma was alone in the first place and while her first instinct was to blame Snow for being the reason she had done what she had done, she suppressed that instinct. For Henry. Always for Henry.

For this, she hovered nervously, as David took on the task of explaining it to Henry and she had to admit she was impressed by the ease of his relationship with Henry. It had never really occurred to her how much Henry would benefit from having a positive male influence in his life. David was really good with him and had a way of getting him to understand things that were hard to hear. Regina wasn't sure she or Snow really had the finesse for it like he did. She glanced at Snow briefly and knew the possibility of her step-daughter getting pregnant again was very high with there being no birth control available anymore. She rolled her eyes a bit at that. It was lost on no one how often those two disappeared into the woods together. People actively avoided the Toll Bridge area for that very reason. But as much as she hated admitting it, as she watched Snow's husband with her son, he was going to make a fantastic father.

He already had with Emma, despite her being grown. He had an ease to his relationship with her that seemed to be able to quell Emma's restless spirit quite easily. She knew the blonde had walls that effectively hid her insecurities and damage. But somehow, to her amazement, Charming hadn't had too much trouble getting past those walls. She supposed that Emma felt safe, even if she hadn't known him for long. But then Charming had been protecting her since the moment she first drew breath. The prince seemed to have the same ability with her son and for Henry's sake, she was grateful for this relationship. After all, the only real issues she had ever had with David were simply the fact that he loved Snow. She could have never foreseen that her greatest enemies would be related to her son by blood. Fate certainly had a sense of humor.

"She lied to me?" Henry asked his grandfather. David sighed and put his hands on Henry's shoulders.

"She did...but not to hurt you, Henry, I promise," David told him.

"That was during a time when Emma was alone and scared. He abandoned her and she was in jail. Your grandmother and I couldn't be there for her," he explained.

"And when you asked about him...I don't think Emma was ready to talk about that time in her life. It was too painful," he added.

"He's right Henry," Emma interjected, as she appeared.

"And you have every right to be mad at me. I shouldn't have lied...I was just scared," she told him.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because we were thieves and I'm not proud of the things I did during that time. I didn't think I'd ever see him again and I wanted you to have a hero to look up to," she replied, as she looked at her parents.

"If I had believed you about the book like I should have, then I would have known you already had heroes you looked up to," she said, making her parents smile softly and with a bit of surprise.

"Is that why you're telling me now? Is he here?" Henry asked. She nodded and Neal stepped toward him.

"You better talk to Gold now," Snow whispered to him. David nodded and kissed her tenderly, before making his way over to Gold. Henry's life was not the only one that was going to change on that day...

#Snowing #SnowxCharming #Charming family #Swanfire #Henry Mills #Regina Mills #Rumbelle #AU #post apocalyptic Storybrooke #romance #family #adventure #love in a ruined world

1 note · View note

asherlockstudy · 6 years

Note

Pls ignore if u dont wanna discuss!I find it interesting you see link as a 'strategic thinker' when I feel like alot of ppl think the opposite(to the point of ytcomments calling him slow/an idiot/on the spectrum).Tho I think alot of his wideeyed goofiness is put on, I put part of awkward stuff said down to not considering implications before talking. Theres even an old video where he talks about how he could reveal something embarrassing at any time and it's part of his personality hes had to ow

Yeah, I know, it’s a rather unusual viewpoint but I stick sooooo hard to it! However, please note that I’m not at all confident about the way I explained my points here. What follows is:

An unnecessarily long essay on how Link Neal’s mind works that makes me worry about myself because honestly why did I even write all this and I am not at all sure I know what I’m talking about, sorry

First of all, those who think Link is an idiot need to pay more attention. Link is probably the control freak (to avoid the term “Big Boss” that would be unfair for Rhett) behind their successful corporation and this takes something more than a slow guy. He could be close to what you can call “on the spectrum”, with his systems and OCD and all, but people with Asperger’s are usually very intelligent anyway. I think Link has these systems mostly for psychological reasons though, the routine makes him feel safer.

Anyway, most of his silly moments are made up for laughs like you said and his ability to confuse the audience as to whether he ‘s trully that silly is technically another success on his part, although I feel he’s getting tired of this role lately.

When Link chooses a stupid answer in a quiz or makes a foolish choice in a game, there is usually a pattern of two explanations:

He often provides a perfect reasoning and then inexpicably goes for the wrong answer / choice, which proves he’s trying to lose in order to get punished for entertaining purposes. He sometimes is in the lead and suddenly gives bonus points to Rhett or something, so there is higher probability for him to lose or, even better, both of them to get punished. On average, if it can’t be ideally both of them, Link subtly tries to be the one getting the punishment. Perhaps he considers his own reactions more dramatic (they usually are) and therefore funnier. In short, Link prefers to get in trouble as long as he provides an entertaining product. It’s a conscious decision that he hides behind silliness. On the contrary, if Rhett can avoid a punishment, he will do so because Rhett often sets as a priority to not look like an idiot.

He genuinely made a stupid choice. Thanks to his hobbies and interests, Rhett is more well-rounded and knowledgeable than Link but if you take the occurences of explanation #1 out of the equation, the ratio of the times Link is being stupid to the times Rhett is gets significantly smaller. Of couse, being less knowledgeable has nothing to do with quick / strategic thinking.

Speaking of quick thinking, Link tends to be wittier than Rhett. Not that Rhett isn’t incredibly witty already but I think Link is as much and slightly more.

In the rare occasion of serious discussions, there are two other possibilities:

Link usually tries to make light of every single conversation (eg in Ear Biscuits), stuck to the fact that they are supposed to be a comedic duo, which isn’t always a guaranteed success and sometimes even generates awkwardness. Rhett doesn’t do that and since he also is the one who usually provides information / knowledge, he comes off as more intelligent and mature without this being necessarily the case.

When Link is 100% serious about something, he’s very different. His stature is different, his facial expressions are different, his eyes become more piercing, even his voice gets deeper. It’s not like Link is a psycho but there are some extremes in his personality and he is usually good at keeping each extremity for where it’s supposed to be. His childish side is ideal for GMM. In rare serious discussions with Rhett on GMMores etc, I find myself agreeing with Link most of the time and despite Rhett’s confidence that he knows Link like the back of his hand, I feel Link actually understands Rhett on an even deeper level than Rhett does. I also think he’s more self aware than Rhett and just knows both of themselves better than Rhett. On the other hand, Rhett is better at manipulating a conversation to his benefit and frequently oozes so much certainty on his argument that Link ends up in the losing side because he knows convincing Rhett otherwise is a challenge and he just gives up. For a long time I instictively thought Rhett was on the right because he gives off this impression of always being right. But when I started paying more attention, I started getting Link’s points more and more. In short, Link is a thoughtful guy ;) whenever he’s given the chance to show it (almost never, sadly).

Now that I expanded on this which wasn’t even what you exactly wanted me to discuss originally, let’s go to your ask in particular. (I just felt I needed to explain first why I don’t consider Link slow.)

As I already mentioned, Link has some extremities in his personality. He is impulsive and emotional which means his emotions drive his actions before his brain can stop him. When he’s angry or very excited or feels sarcastic or anything really, he will just blurt out whatever’s on his mind. But that doesn’t mean Link does not understand what he is talking about, it just means he doesn’t have a good filter on his mouth and at the moment he does not care to have one either.

There might be a paradox about Link - although he strikes me as an extrovert, he is actually not particularly socially skilled. But social awkwardness has little to do with intelligence as a whole (there is what we call social intelligence of course) and it is more common than not for intelligent people to be socially awkward and generate many weird moments. Then again, Link is very sensitive in awkwardness or inappropriate remarks or insults when it’s someone else doing it (not necessarily to him) which makes me think that he has a perfect understanding of what he says too at all times, only he’s usually bursting too much with enthusiasm, fury, hurt, irony or love to keep his mouth shut effectively. In occasions when he feels uncomfortable, another extremity of his is severe anxiety and he feels so much pressure to improve the situation that he will try to say anything to alleviate the moment which inevitably leads to failure quite often. I think that’s what happens in his personal awkward moments.

In GMM, in all these lovely moments when Link says something that makes us go “What on earth did he say again?”, like 85% of it, Link is perfectly super-absolutely aware of what he’s saying. Extremely aware. Like the “meat flap” to Stevie. He’s also angry in that video which explains his boldness. Or even the “Your wife can hang out with me anytime” to Rhett. I start suspecting he was even playing up a bit his shocked reaction after the Newsical kiss with Rhett. That’s how gloriously evil I consider him

The rest is because of emotions and an even looser filter since Link knows that there are no really bad implications that can occur during GMM unless, I dunno, he says something really horrible which he doesn’t really do. I mean, Rhett may say something extremely awkward more rarely but it usually can be even worse or more hurtful than whatever Link says.

Last but not least, Link is the epitome of clumsiness. This contributes to the idea of him being foolish, although they are not really correlated, if anything, it’s just a stereotype. His brain also tends to get stuck to a certain thing which makes him oblivious to anything else for the time being but I seriously doubt it is as much of a deal as Rhett makes it to be. Technically this is filtering of what matters to him, at least in his case.

But when Link is not a rollercoaster of emotions and feels relaxed or has already processed something and is confident about it, that’s when the strategic thinking comes up and I seriously think he’s unbeatable. I think Rhett has a more relatable kind of intelligence and he is clever in pretty much everything more or less whereas Link can be absolutely ignorant in what he doesn’t care about but can easily rip everyone apart in any field he shows an interest in and that is beneficial for him (management, finances, marketing, humour, entertainment, acting, psychology, yes, psychology, remember Sheena who said he has amazing empathy and he is the leader? Sheena knew what she was talking about). And probably many other fields of interest I don’t know about but all these need a good strategic brain. Link channels his intelligence in certain ways, probably for efficiency, and his way of thinking is also a bit peculiar which might estrange initially but he’s veeeeeeeeeeeeeeery clever underneath this carefully constructed persona. And underneath that soft cookie there is a much more challenging man to deal with. And underneath that divine calming smile there is a hell of emotions, good mixed with bad. I think he’s a very intense person.

I find him so fascinating that he almost scares me. There is a small chance he fascinates me so much that I straight up imagine things about him but honestly I think I may be right about at least a few of these. He’s definitely much smarter than most people think he is, let’s leave it at that XD

#link neal #randl #rhett and link #good mythical morning #ask #anon #mail #not sherlock #I had trouble posting this because I feel so unsure #perhaps nobody will see this anyway #the cringe is real #mythical #more

105 notes · View notes

thiswomanshouldbewriting · 6 years

Text

A Tale of Magic - Chapter 4 (Sons)

In the past, Belle has to deal with an unexpected development. In Storybrooke, father-son relationships will move things forward.

As always, thanks to my wonderful beta @galactic-pirates.

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Ao3 link.

As the weeks passed, life found a new, pleasant rhythm inside and around the Evil Queen’s castle. Snow and David were doing a great job at organizing things so that everyone’s skills were put to good use; camps were cultivated under Tiny’s expert supervision, Marco coordinated the construction of new houses, and Regina’s magic was turning out to be a real blessing, especially when Blue refused to offer help with some issues. It was Regina who had to turn Archie back into a human when the fairy refused to do so.

“I turned him into a cricket to give him another chance at being free and, most importantly, being good. To turn him back would mean taking away the lesson he learned on that day,” was her only explanation.

Blue also resented the fact that several dwarves, beside Snow’s seven old friends, had decided to help around the castle rather than go back to the mines. The decrease in the production of fairy dust only seemed to irritate her more, making it even harder to obtain help from her, but aside from Blue’s sour mood things were going nicely.

Even Belle had been assigned to her dream occupation. She was now in charge of Regina’s old library, with the added duty of collecting and recording all of the knowledge that they had acquired through their cursed memories. She had been given a list of every person who had come to the castle, and she had noted beside everyone the fields in which they were knowledgeable. It was a pity that Whale had gone back to his old world, and not just because Ruby missed him terribly; medical knowledge had been way more advanced in the Land Without Magic, and it was definitely one of their highest priorities. Thankfully, a bunch of nurses had come over, giving her a place to start.

She went to talk to the first one early one morning, bringing parchment and ink down to the infirmary, so that nurse Lewis, Charlotte, could still be available if there was an emergency. Everything was going nicely, and Belle already had three sheets of parchment full of notes, when the other woman started cleaning something with alcohol. The pungent smell went straight to Belle’s stomach, and a second later she was fighting the need to throw up.

“I’m sorry,” she said as soon as she was able to talk again. “I haven’t been feeling well these past few weeks, and strong smells really don’t help.”

There was a curious look on the nurse’s face.

“For how long exactly? Why didn’t you say something sooner?” she asked.

“I don’t know, I guess since shortly after we came back to the Enchanted Forest. I just didn’t pay much attention at first because, well… my True Love had just died. Feeling sick was basically a constant state for me,” Belle explained. God, it still hurt so much to say it.

“My condolences,” Charlotte said immediately. “Look, I know this might be too blunt and possibly a shock for you, but have you considered the possibility that you might be pregnant?”

It took Belle several seconds to fully grasp the meaning of her words.

“No,” she said instinctively, without even thinking. “No, I can’t be, it’s not possible…”

But it was. Her voice trailed off as the realization hit her. She had been so caught up in her grief that she had missed all the signs: the sickness, her missing period, even her sudden and strange craving for lemon cakes. Her head started spinning, and she sat down heavily on the closest bed.

“I mean, it’s just a thought, you’re not certainly pregnant,” Charlotte said, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Belle shook her head. She might not have considered the possibility until then, but now she felt in her heart that it was the truth. She was pregnant. She was going to have Rumplestiltskin’s child, and she didn’t know if that made her feel better or worse. Now a part of Rumplestiltskin would always be with her, and their love would live on in the new life they had created together. Yet their child would never know its father, nor would she ever see Rumplestiltskin’s eyes lit up as he held his child for the first time. Images of the life they could have had flashed before her eyes, and knowing that they’d never become real felt like losing Rumplestiltskin all over again.

Neal was the first person she told about it. He was very surprised, then sympathetic, and eventually he managed to make her laugh by quipping about having always wanted to be a big brother. She had lost Rumple, but his children were still here, and she’d do her damnedest to take care of them as Rumple would have. Even though she had no idea where to start.

**********

By the time Neal and Henry arrived in Storybrooke, they had been attacked two more times. Emma and Regina were waiting for them at the townline, ready to fight off any other monkeys. Zelena’s beasts tried to keep anyone from leaving town, but coming back in was easier, as Emma herself had seen. Better safe than sorry, Emma thought, even though her magic was still quite unreliable. Regina was trying to teach her, but Emma was turning out to be quite a difficult student. She was full of potential, but she had trouble channeling her emotions into her spells. Emma would never admit it, but she suspected that part of her struggle was due to the fact that, deep down, she still hadn’t accepted all this magic craziness. She had started to after Henry ate that poisoned turnover, but he was the believer in the family, not her. After nine months back in the real world, with its normal problems, Storybrooke felt like nonsense. Dangerous nonsense. Back in New York, bills were her major problem. Now that magic was back in her life, the stakes had risen so much; she wasn’t struggling to make ends meet anymore, she was fighting to keep her family alive. Even though she knew this was technically her world, a part of her couldn’t help but long for the calm of her old life.

Henry rushed to hug her as soon as the car was safely across the townline, immediately making her mood lighter. Magic or not, she felt infinitely better with Henry in her arms. Neal came to hug her next, while Henry awkwardly shook hands with Regina. Emma could see the pain in her eyes at not being recognized by her own son, but there was nothing she could do about it. As much as it pained Regina to admit it, even she had agreed that it wasn’t wise to tell Henry that he’d actually been abandoned as a newborn. His world had just been turned upside down, and the last thing he needed was another shock, especially now that he knew he was in danger.

Neal decided to go back to his father’s house, to check on Belle and hopefully get some sleep. To Emma’s surprise, Henry hugged him before saying goodbye, even if he was somewhat awkward.

“I’ll see you tomorrow Neal… I mean dad, I mean… what do you want me to call you?” Henry asked, confused. Every word felt wrong on his tongue.

“It’s alright, you can still call me Neal if you want,” Neal reassured him immediately. “But should you feel like it, then call me ‘Papa’. It’s what I always called my father.”

Henry nodded, clearly more at ease, and Emma burned with curiosity. She wanted to know more about this sudden change in Henry and Neal’s relationship, but she didn’t want to pressure her son. She was pretty sure he wouldn’t keep silent about it for long anyway.

“I hit that monkey in the face, you know? Twice!” Henry said enthusiastically after they had parted from Regina as well.

“I hope the monkey didn’t do the same to you,” Emma replied, torn between pride and worry.

“Nope. It did try, but Neal always stopped it. He saved me, more than once. Not that I wasn’t able to take care of myself, but Neal helped. A lot,” Henry babbled, still high on adrenaline.

“I’m glad that you two are on better terms now. I’m sorry I had to leave you with him, especially when you didn’t trust him, but things have a tendency to go downhill pretty quickly in Storybrooke,” Emma explained.

“Because of magic?” Henry asked, still not quite able to believe it. “It’s all true then? Fairytale characters are real and a curse brought them here?”

“Yes. Crazy, right?” Emma said, smiling as she remembered the time when she had been the skeptical one.

“Neal said there are things from the past that we don’t remember. That our memories were erased and that we had met him before. That’s why you changed your mind about him?” he asked her. He didn’t think Neal could have come out with such an absurd explanation just to trick him, but he needed confirmation that his story and his mother’s matched.

“Yes. When we met him again, in the months you have forgotten, I discovered that there was a reason why he had left me alone. Not a great reason, but still better than him just wanting to run away with the money. He has been trying very hard to make it up to us, and he loves you very much,” Emma confirmed.

“I think he loves you as well. He gets emotional whenever he talks about you,” Henry said, curious at what his mother’s reaction would be.

“Maybe he does, but right now we don’t have time for that,” Emma brushed the matter off. “I’m more focused on getting your memory back and keeping you safe. We still don’t know what exactly that witch wants from all of us.”

Her attempt to change the subject was way too obvious to be missed. Henry wasn’t sure of what he thought of that, but he would surely keep a closer eye on his parents from now on. There was definitely a lot going on there.

**********

Ever since she had told the others that she was pregnant, Belle had hardly been left alone for a moment. There was always someone fussing over her, even more so than when she was ‘just’ grieving. She appreciated it, she truly did, but from time to time she felt the need to be alone with her thoughts, and the night was perfect for that. When she woke up from a nightmare - which was a common occurrence for her - she often saw no point in lying awake in the dark when there was no one to calm her and hold her as she fell back to sleep. So she got dressed and wandered through the castle, oftentimes ending up in the courtyard; she loved the flowers that grew there, and there was something bittersweet and soothing in looking up at the sky and wondering if Rumple was looking down at her from wherever he was.

That night, however, the courtyard wasn’t empty when she reached it. Regina was already sitting on one of the benches, and she turned around with a start when she heard Belle approaching.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” Belle apologized immediately, already turning her back on the other woman to walk away. She didn’t feel like talking, especially not with Regina.

“No, wait, I actually wanted to talk to you,” Regina said after a second, as if she had been debating whether to speak or not.

Belle sighed, her back still turned to the queen. She could simply walk away; they weren’t friends by any means, after all, and she was tired. Yet being so rude really went against her nature, and she supposed she could just hear what this was about and leave if the whole thing got uncomfortable. She walked towards the bench, reminding herself that this wasn’t the same woman who had imprisoned her and erased her personality at least twice.

“What do you want, Regina?” she asked, her voice coming out just a tad more annoyed than she had meant it to. If Regina noticed, she didn’t let it show.

“I just want you to know that I’m sorry for all that you’re going through. I didn’t say it before, but I really mean it,” Regina said somewhat awkwardly. “Losing your True Love is terrible, and you didn’t deserve this. Probably nobody does.”

Belle could see the honesty in Regina’s eyes, and she really wished she could simply accept her condolences and walk away, but something about her choice of words really set her off. She had been building up tension, grief and anger for so long, and suddenly something inside of her snapped.

“Then why did you do your damnedest to put me and Rumplestiltskin through that kind of pain over and over again?” she asked, her voice already cracking with tears. “Why should I listen to you when your scheming took away so much of the limited time I had with Rumple? You’ve done nothing but mentally and physically torture me ever since we’ve known each other!”

Regina was taken aback by her outburst, but the quick flash of indignation in her eyes died straight away to be replaced by guilt.

“I’m sorry,” she said after a beat of silence. “I truly am. I know I did horrible things to you, and you didn’t deserve them.”

She was a new person now, or at least she was trying to be, but it was so much harder in the Enchanted Forest, where everything and everyone seemed to remind her of her past.

“Thank you,” Belle deadpanned. “Look, I had to let this out sooner or later, but I really don’t want to fight. You’ve hurt me, and this apology was long overdue, but I’m willing to try and move past that now that you’re changing,” she added, her tone turning more conciliating.

“You know, in a way I actually admire you,” Regina blurted out, surprising even herself for having said it out loud. Belle looked quizzically at her, so she went on.

“I admire you because you have a strength I never had. You are willing to forgive people no matter how much they’ve hurt you, and despite everything that life - or I, for that matter - threw at you, you didn’t let it change you. Darkness is a slippery slope, and you’ve always managed to keep yourself away from it,” Regina explained.

“Is it truly a big deal if I’ve never even been tempted?” Belle asked, a small smile finally forming on her face. Try as she might, she had never truly seen the appeal of darkness. When things went south, she was prone to blaming herself, and that was something that no amount of dark magic could fix. “Maybe it’s people like you and Rumplestiltskin who deserve the most praise,” she went on “Those who were tempted and fell into the pit, and then fought tooth and nail to get out of it.”

Regina looked even more shocked by her understanding than she had been by her accusations, and flashed Belle a bittersweet smile.

“That child is very lucky to have you as its mother. Motherhood is Rumplestiltskin’s last gift to you, and believe me when I say it’s the best gift you’ll ever receive. It surely was for me,” Regina said, then she stood up and teleported away, vanishing into the night before Belle even had the time to wish her goodnight.

Belle sat on that bench for several more minutes, pondering the other woman’s words, one hand on her still flat belly. She hadn’t expected Regina to apologize, let alone to compliment her. If only she felt as strong as the other woman had said; as far as she could tell, Belle had merely been a spectator in her own life recently. From being used and tossed around as a pawn by everyone who wanted to get back at Rumple, to being literally frozen in place as her True Love died, to finally this pregnancy, which was wanted but definitely unplanned; she hadn’t chosen anything. That was the first thing she needed to fix if she wanted to give her child their best chance; she needed to be stronger, to stand up for herself like she had done today with Regina. She needed to do it, no matter how hard it was, because now it wasn’t just herself that she needed to protect.

**********

Neal was exhausted after the long drive from New York to Storybrooke, and he was glad that the situation in town was still calm enough to allow him to get some sleep. The peace, however, was short lived. When he woke up, Belle informed him that there had been strange sightings in the woods during the night.

“A cloaked figure was spotted by several people on patrol duty, and those that tried to get closer to it were either teleported away or thrown to the ground with magic,” she said over breakfast, pushing her food around her plate. “No one was seriously hurt, but everyone thinks that this is a sign that Zelena is moving. They are trying to find out who is under the cloak, but not even Ruby seems able to follow its trail.”

“Do you think it’s my father under the cloak?” Neal asked cautiously.

Belle sighed, setting her plate aside altogether. “I think it’s very likely. This cloaked figure isn’t even attacking us, it’s just going around ominously. I think it’s just a diversion, and what better diversion than to have us chase someone only to discover we can’t and won’t hurt him?”

“Have you told Snow about this?”

“Yes, I have, but she still thinks we ought to track it down, and I agree. If it’s not Rumple, maybe we can learn something more about the witch’s plan. If it’s him… at least we can know how he’s doing,” she said, twisting her napkin in her hands.

Under any other circumstances, she would have been out there looking for him herself. Zelena was controlling him through the dagger, but she already knew that her and Rumple’s love was stronger than his curse; if there was someone who could help him break free of the dagger’s hold, it was her. Maybe Neal could as well, but while she was sure that there was True Love between Rumple and his son, she also thought that their relationship was still too tentative to fight such powerful dark magic. Yet she couldn’t go trek in the woods this far along in her pregnancy, especially not when she knew that Zelena was coming after her baby.

“What really worries me isn’t that Snow and the others are tracking him down,” Belle added after a moment. “It’s that I don’t know what kind of orders that witch is giving him. What if she forces him to do something horrible, something he’ll have trouble forgiving himself for?”

Rumplestiltskin had been her prisoner for months now, and Belle only had the faintest idea of what she had been forcing him to do in that time. Every extra minute he spent under her control could be the one in which she made him cross the line, assuming she hadn’t already.

“Hey, he hasn’t had to cause any real harm so far, let’s focus on that. We will free him, I promise,” Neal reassured her.

“If only we had more time…” Belle murmured, caressing her large belly. Her son could be born any moment now, and Zelena would come for him. She had no idea of what would happen next, and she hoped she’d never find out.

“I know, and that’s why I’m going out to help Emma search the woods. I promise I’ll do anything to protect you and my little brother,” he said, smiling reassuringly at her.

He hugged her, then he left the pink mansion, stopping by his father’s shop to retrieve his old saber. Then he called Emma and they agreed to meet at the townline.

“Henry gave me hell this morning. He realized that something was wrong and kept insisting on coming with me. I left him with Granny, at least I know that someone is keeping an eye on him and he isn’t sneaking around and putting himself in harm’s way,” Emma told him as they started trekking through the woods.

“Yes, he definitely has a talent for that. I guess he takes after both of us,” Neal said, preferring to focus on the comical aspect of the whole thing rather than dwell on how much danger their son was in.

“It must run in your family. After all, your father is the one who decided to break into your apartment when we came looking for you in New York,” Emma observed.

“Are you telling me I should get my baby brother some lock-picking tools already?” Neal asked, chuckling.

Emma laughed with him, but their hilarity was short-lived. A shadow moved amidst the trees to their right, and they immediately ran after it. The cloaked figure waved a hand; Emma was engulfed by purple smoke and disappeared. Neal looked at the spot where she had been until a moment before, paralyzed by fear.

She has just been poofed away, he told himself. She’s fine, probably on the other side of town, but unharmed. He turned back, anger making him bold.

“What did you do to her?” he screamed, then launched himself at the cloaked figure, determined to find out who it really was, and possibly get some answers.

He shouldn’t have bothered; his opponent, instead of trying to run away as he’d expected, slowly raised his arms to lower his hood. When Neal saw who he was fighting against, Neal stopped dead in his tracks, his stomach in knots.

Belle had been right. The mysterious figure was indeed Rumplestiltskin, but only in part. There was very little of his papa in the deranged eyes of the imp in front of him. There was no fondness in his gaze, no torment over being controlled, no sign that he even realized who he was fighting against. His skin was once again covered in scales, his eyes reptilian and inhuman, and Neal felt as though one of his nightmares had just come to life.

The imp giggled maniacally as a sword materialized in its hands, and Neal wiped his clammy hands on his trousers as he realized that he’d have to fight the worst incarnation of his father. He didn’t know what had happened to him; his hope was that Zelena was simply forcing him to be like this to upset her enemies, but a part of Neal couldn’t help but fear that, after being imprisoned for so long, his father had simply succumbed to the curse.

He was so lost in his own fear that he almost failed to block Rumplestiltskin’s first attack. His instinct kicked in at the last moment, and the fight began. Even without using magic, Rumplestiltskin proved himself a great swordsman, and Neal soon found himself struggling against him, fatigue starting to slow down his movements while his father seemed unaffected, the curse providing him an unfair advantage. The situation was made even more difficult by the fact that Neal just wasn’t thinking clearly. Seeing his father like this had brought him back to his fourteenth birthday, awakening a fear he had thought long gone, and that was making it hard to concentrate on the fight. He felt despair starting to creep in; he couldn’t win this fight, he couldn’t stop Rumplestiltskin, he couldn’t run away. He was alone and alone he’d die. He thought of Henry, who was just starting to let him in again, and who didn’t deserve to grow up without a father. He thought of Rumplestiltskin, who would never forgive himself for harming his son while he was under the dagger’s influence. He thought of Belle, who had already gone through so much, and who would be devastated at losing him. Lastly, he thought of Emma, and of how he would leave her alone again.

Rumplestiltskin attacked him, and the sheer force of his blow was enough to make the saber fly out of Neal’s hands. Disarmed and defeated, Neal took a step back, his back colliding with a tree. That was it then. He would be killed by his own father, by the man he had loved and feared the most. Rumplestiltskin roughly grabbed him by the neck, and Neal closed his eyes, bracing himself for the worst.

It was in that moment that an anguished scream echoed through the forest.

“Papa NO!” Henry yelled, bursting out from behind the trees, Emma, Regina and Granny trailing right behind him.

Papa. Papa. Papa. The word kept bouncing around Rumplestiltskin’s brain, becoming louder and louder, drowning out the voices in his head. He doubled over, cradling his head in his own hands and letting Neal go.

Neal rushed to hug his son, both terrified and relieved to have him here.

“Rumplestiltskin teleported me back to the loft,” Emma explained. “Henry refused to let me come back alone, and I didn’t have time to argue. I called Regina and she poofed us back here.”

Neal nodded in understanding, then he turned around to look at his father again. Rumplestiltskin looked confused, even more deranged than before, but there was something human in his distress, something that hadn’t been there before. He had dropped his sword to the ground, and was eyeing them curiously. After a beat of silence, a single word escaped his lips.

“Bae.”

Neal stood paralyzed for a moment, almost not daring to believe it.

“Papa? You remember me?” Neal asked, taking a few tentative steps in his father’s direction.

That word again. Papa. Images flashed before Rumplestiltskin’s eyes, making the present more confusing but the past more clear. The tiny hand of a newborn touching his nose. A thin, fragile kid asking him why his mother wasn’t coming home. A boy screaming at him that he was a coward. A grown man hugging him and telling him he was nothing like Peter Pan. And above all, that word repeated over and over again: Papa. Rumplestiltskin staggered forward, towards the man he had been fighting until a few moments ago. He didn’t want to hurt him anymore. He couldn’t. He shouldn’t.

But you have to, another voice resonated in his head, a vicious whisper that made his skin crawl. Fight him, scare him, be his nightmare, the voice went on, and Rumplestiltskin watched in horror as his hands moved against his own volition, working magic he didn’t want to perform. Everyone but Neal was paralyzed, and Rumplestiltskin grabbed his sword again, as Neal hurried to retrieve his saber. This time, however, there was no fear in Neal’s eyes.

“I know you’re in there. I know you can hear me. I don’t want to hurt you,” Neal said as his father attacked him again. Rumplestiltskin’s movements were slower now, his hands trembling; Neal hoped it was a sign that he was trying to stop himself.

“I know you’re being forced to do this. I know you’d never try to hurt me, as I know you’re not the monster I once feared you were turning into. I’m not scared of you anymore, I’m not scared of the darkness anymore,” Neal insisted, as his father walked backwards, blocking his attacks with increasing difficulty.

Rumplestiltskin looked relieved when his sword finally slipped from his grip, falling to the ground. He looked at his son, struggling to quiet all the voices in his mind, to clear the fog just long enough to say something. He knew there was something important he needed to tell him, many important things actually, but he couldn’t for his life make out what those were.

“I’m sorry,” was all he managed to murmur in the end. Then he vanished in a puff of smoke, Neal’s saber disappearing with him. Emma and the others were freed from his spell, and Neal rushed to their side.

“I was so scared for you,” Henry screamed, all but jumping in his arms.

“It’s okay, I’m alright,” Neal reassured him. “I don’t like the idea of you running around and putting yourself in harm’s way, but I have to admit that I probably wouldn’t have made it without you. Hearing you call me ‘Papa’ gave me strength.”

“Hey, I think I showed you on our way here that we work better as a team; plus I just found you, I’m not going to let some crazy monster take you away right now,” Henry said, almost embarrassed by his own display of affection. Just yesterday he had barely tolerated Neal’s presence, and now here he was, already calling him Papa. True, they had spent several hours just saving each other over and over again, but there was more to it. He knew that they had met during the months that he couldn’t remember, and he was sure that some part of those memories had been preserved; nothing else could explain the deep, visceral trust that he now felt towards his father, together with a great sense of belonging. He might not remember the time they’d spent together, but that didn’t make it any less real, and some part of him knew it.

Neal’s emotional rollercoaster wasn’t over yet. He had been utterly terrified, then conquered one of his greatest fears, and now his son was beaming up at him in pride, and he felt almost giddy with happiness. He leaned down to press a kiss on Henry’s forehead, hoping that he wasn’t overstepping, just desperate to let his son know how much he meant to him.

That’s when a burst of magic rippled from his lips, sweeping over the town in the form of a rainbow. The curse was broken, and Neal looked flabbergasted at his son while Henry staggered under the flood of memories.

“Papa!” he screamed again, wrapping his arms tighter around Neal. “I remember everything!”

Then he spotted Regina looking almost disbelievingly at him.

“Mom!” he said, running over to her.

Regina felt as though her heart had finally started beating again. She wrapped Henry in her arms, immediately noticing how much taller he had grown during the past nine months. Tears welled up in her eyes, but for once she didn’t mind; she had her son back, and for a moment Zelena didn’t look like much of a threat. So long as Henry was by her side, she felt she could do anything.

**********

Rumplestiltskin poofed back into the cabin, his head still swirling in confusion as his aspect turned human again.

“You did a great job,” Zelena complimented him as he staggered back into his cage, shying away from the dagger that she held against him. “I got everything I wanted, and even more.”

She had sent Rumplestiltskin out to collect a token of Neal’s courage, and the saber with which he defeated his greatest fear fit the description perfectly. What she hadn’t expected was a clue on how to get Rumplestiltskin out of his madness.

“Soon enough you’ll be fully sane again, and then you’ll see how wrong you were all those years ago. I want to see the despair in your face when you realize you should have chosen me,” she hissed at him, watching with satisfaction as fear glimmered in his eyes.

Zelena cackled as she walked away: like everyone else, Rumplestiltskin had just no idea of how much worse things were going to get.

#Rumbelle #Swanfire #Rumbelle fic #Ouat AU #Rumbelle AU #A Tale of Magic #Sara writes #Sara talks

10 notes · View notes

unfolded73 · 7 years

Text

Somewhere Along the Line (1/1)

Snook or Captain Snow or whatever the Killian and Snow broTP is called. Rated G, ~1.9k

Idk, I felt like writing these two together. Spoilers for the 7x01 sneak peek, sort of, at least in terms of Henry’s plans. Also hey, remember during S6 filming when we saw a set photo with a black Trans Am in it, and it seemed like it would be the perfect car for Killian? I used that idea.

The black Trans Am caught Snow’s eye as it rolled past the playground, and she turned her head to watch it go, doing a double take at the familiar dark-haired man behind the wheel, the windows rolled all the way down.

“Killian!” she called out as the car stopped at the corner. He looked over, lifted his hook in a wave, and then turned the corner and pulled into a parking space next to the playground.

“Mommy, look!” Neal shouted, and Snow turned in time to see him slide down the toddler-sized slide.

“Good job, honey!” she called. Neal beamed at her approval, jumping to his feet and racing around the small jungle gym to the ladder on the other side.

“Well, fancy meeting you here,” Killian said as he approached. “You have that whole farm for Neal to run around on and you come into town for this?”

“Neal loves this little playground; he asks me or David to come here all the time, and I finally relented. But never mind that; Killian, what’s with the car?” She looked at it again, with its golden firebird decal on the hood. “I mean, David said he’d pretty much finished giving you driving lessons, but I didn’t know you’d already gotten a car.”

“That was a surprise from my lovely wife. She had the steering wheel modified with an attachment for my hook and everything.” He beamed with pride, rocking back on his heels and puffing his chest out a little bit.

“You know, I can’t say I’d necessarily imagined you with a nineteen-seventies muscle car, but it suits you,” she said.

“Hook!” Neal shouted. “Watch me slide!”

They both paused and watched as Neal slid the very short distance between the top of the plastic slide and the bottom. “Well done, lad!” Killian called before turning back to his mother-in-law. “What is it about it that suits me, Snow, is it its overwhelming manliness?” He hooked his thumb in his belt and raised an eyebrow, his hips swaying back and forth.

“Oh, shut up.” She patted the bench next to her. “Come sit with me for a bit… unless you have somewhere to be?”

He pointed to the deputy badge on his vest. “I’m on call at the moment, but I can certainly sit with you unless or until a call comes in.”

“You’ve gotten quite savvy with technology, having calls from the sheriff’s office forwarded to your cell phone,” Snow commented as Killian sat down next to her on the park bench.

He grimaced. “Emma did it for me, actually.”

They watched Neal run around, the boy entirely enthralled with the stairs, ladders, and bridges that made up the playground equipment. The sunny fall day was pleasantly cool, and Neal’s cheeks were ruddy with exertion and with the wind.

“Do you have one of those red bubble lights for your new car?” Snow said with a smirking smile, bumping his shoulder with hers.

“As a matter of fact, I do,” he said, bumping her in return.

“You know,” Snow said, her eyes tracking back to Neal, always instinctively checking to make sure he was safe. “You’re different with me now.” She felt rather than saw him react.

“Different how?”

“When we first met, you very much wanted to show that you didn’t care what I thought. That you weren’t impressed by royalty. And then you got serious about Emma and started to care very much what I thought. And from then on, you were more guarded with me. Not all the time, but a lot of the time.”

He looked down at his lap and smiled. “And now?”

She nudged his shoulder with hers again. “Somewhere along the line, you’ve relaxed.”

He cleared his throat and looked up. “I cared very much what you thought, you’re right, and I assumed little of it was good. It was hard to imagine you and David would ever welcome me into your family.”

“Emma’s happiness was so important to us, especially given the way she had to grow up. Regardless of what we may have thought at the time, it was pretty clear that you were what made Emma happy.” She reached over and patted his knee. “And it’s obviously still true. I probably don’t tell you that enough, how grateful I am that you’re such a wonderful husband to my daughter.”

His adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. “Thank you. I’m not sure I deserve such heartfelt gratitude -- I’m the one who should be grateful -- but thanks all the same.”

“I asked Henry if he was starting to look at colleges the other day,” Snow said, deciding to change the subject before either of them got more emotional, “and I know it’s still a year away, but he gave me the most noncommittal answer I think I’ve ever heard from anyone about anything ever. What gives?”

“Ah, yes. That’s a difficult topic with both of his mothers at the moment.” Killian scratched behind his ear. “He’s recently posited that he may not want to go to college.”

“Henry? Not go to college?” Snow blinked a few times, her mouth hanging open for a second before she snapped it closed. “I just always assumed…”

“Aye, so did Emma. And since she didn’t go herself, she’s all the more insistent that Henry get a degree.” He sighed. “Regina feels much the same. But Henry has other ideas.”

“And what do you think he should do?” Snow asked. She’d grown used to the idea that in this realm, college was the inevitable destination for a clever student like Henry, but at the same time, she’d known many brilliant people in the Enchanted Forest who were mostly self-taught.

Killian’s eyebrows went up. “I’m trying to keep out of it, lest I be accused of butting in where my opinion isn’t wanted.”

“Emma would never say that.”

“Regina might. Her acceptance of me as Henry’s stepfather is, shall we say, grudging.”

“I don’t think that’s true anymore, but in any case, I’d like to hear your opinion.”

He scratched at the wood of the bench with the tip of his hook. “I think there’s no point in forcing the boy to go to college if he isn’t motivated to go himself. One gets no more out of advanced study than one puts in. And as I understand it, he could go later in life if he chose to.”

“That’s pretty wise, Killian,” Snow said, her eyes trained on Neal as he climbed the four wide, metal stairs to get to the slide for approximately the hundredth time.

He grinned. “Well, I am known for being both pretty and wise, your grace.”

Snow rolled her eyes at the honorific, although she supposed she preferred it to the few weeks he’d after he and Emma and first married when he’d winkingly called her ‘mummy.’ “So what’s Henry thinking of doing instead?”

“Ah, well, there we get into the other reason his mothers are displeased. Henry’s been spending a lot of time up in the old sorcerer’s mansion lately, reading legends from other realms. He’s become rather attached to the idea of visiting some of them. Seeking other stories, now that his own family has their happy ending.” Killian made a face on speaking those words, as if the idea that he’d been gifted a happy ending still surprised him, even after more than two years of what appeared from Snow’s vantage point to be a blissfully happy marriage.

“He wants to cross realms? That could be dangerous.”

“Aye, that’s what Emma and Regina have been saying.”

“You disagree?”

“I don’t disagree that it could be dangerous, but he’ll be eighteen, which is considered an adult in this realm, at least in some respects.” Neal chose that moment to run over and crash into Killian’s knees, and Killian pulled the three-year-old up onto his lap without missing a beat. “If he wants to go, I believe we should support him. I understand Emma’s instinct is to want to hold him close -- Regina’s too -- but he has to make his own way in the world. Even if it means we’ll worry about him. We can’t hold Henry back in order to make ourselves more comfortable.”

“Come push me, Hook! Push me on the swing!” Neal said, putting a chubby hand on Killian’s face and turning it toward himself to get his brother-in-law’s attention.

Killian smiled indulgently. “All right, lad. Give me just a moment.” He set Neal back on his feet, and he tore off toward the swingset.

“You need to talk to Emma. It sounds like Henry needs you in his corner,” Snow said, standing up and pulling Killian to his feet so that they could follow Neal.

He sighed again. “Aye, I suspect you’re right.”

Neal tried to climb up into the seat of a swing, and ended up on his stomach, flopped over with his arms outstretched, slowly swinging back and forth. Snow picked him up and righted him in the seat as Killian dutifully stood behind him and gave him a gentle push once he was certain the toddler was holding on tight.

“You’re Henry’s stepfather, and you have a right to speak up,” Snow told him.

“Higher, Hook, push me higher!” Neal shouted, swinging his legs back and forth.

Killian pushed a little bit harder, giving a look with Snow that seemed to ask if he was being gentle enough. “I will, but I need to give Emma more time to adjust to the idea before I say anything in Henry’s defense.”

Snow smiled. “You know my daughter very well.”

“Aye, I’d like to think so.”

He continued pushing Neal on the swing for a few more minutes before the boy was ready to stop and leapt down to run back to the jungle gym.

“That lad has quite a lot of energy,” Killian said, watching Neal’s legs carry him quickly from place to place.

“Yeah, he’ll run around like that until he gets overtired and decides he needs to throw a tantrum.” Snow looked at her watch. “Speaking of which, I’d better take him home for his nap.”

“And I should resume my patrol,” he said, glancing up at the sun. Snow wondered if he’d ever break the habit of checking the sky to estimate the time of day rather than looking at a clock. “We’ll see you at our place for dinner on Sunday?”

“Yep.” Snow pulled him into a hug impulsively. “Our family would be much poorer without you in it, you know that?”

His arms came up hesitantly and returned her embrace. “Aye.”

“Good,” patting his shoulder as they pulled apart. “You need to know your worth. And so does Henry, even if that means seeking it in far off places.”

Killian smirked. “Maybe you should talk to Emma.”

“Oh no, you’re not roping me into that drama. Grandma’s prerogative: I get to sit back and nod sympathetically.” She scooped Neal up into her arms as he tried to run past her, his feet kicking uselessly against the air. “See you later.”

With a laugh, Killian waved. “Goodbye, Mummy.”

Snow groaned. “Don’t start that again.” But she shot him a grin over he shoulder as she made her way toward her station wagon. “Bye bye, Son.”

#snook ff #captain snow ff #cs ff #captain cobra ff #my fic #ouat spoilers #(a tiny bit)

106 notes · View notes

yeehawbisexualold · 7 years

Text

I, Emma Take Thee Killian

An EF AU very loosly based off the infamous “I, Ross take thee Rachel” scene, inspired by @sailorkillian and the anon who sent her this ask.

also tagging, @colinoslayme, @blowmiakisscolin, and @kmomof4

4.6k words ~ also on ao3

The Charming family has finally defeated the Evil Queen. After years of torment and suffering, they’ve vanquished her for good—banished her to a far off land, that she’ll be unable to return from. All it took was the help of Rumpelstiltskin. The man who had previously been unwilling to aid them against Regina had finally found something worth his interest or, to be precise, his son’s interest.

Emma met Neal when she was 17.

She had been preparing to take her horse out for a ride when she saw movement in her peripheral vision, a blur running through the forest. Grabbing a sword, she headed after whatever she had spotted to discover a young man hiding in the trees.

He told her his name was Neal and that he was hiding from his father. He didn’t ask her for help but she had been raised by, whom she is sure to be, the most compassionate rulers to ever live and she had learned to spot a soul in need. So she offered him food, promised to keep his secret, and began to spend time with him.

After weeks of meeting in the forest near her home, he told her more about himself. That his real name was Baelfire and his father The Dark One. That he spent hundreds of years in Neverland after his father essentially abandoned him through a portal. That he’d spent some time after that aging in a land without magic until, only near a fortnight before she found him, he’d returned to this realm.

She felt for him, having been abandoned by both of his parents. She couldn’t imagine the pain one must feel to grow up like that—alone, unloved, and lacking guidance. Her parents had always been the most loving and supportive a girl could ask for but she knew there was a time when that almost didn’t happen.

When she was 10 and Regina was in a particularly vindictive mood—wreaking her special form of havoc—her parents told her about the dark curse that she had intended to cast and how Emma was nearly separated from them at birth. Luckily for them, the curse failed and aside from some minor Regina induced hiccups, they had been together and happy ever since.

She was content with her life as the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming. But aside from the perpetual threat of the Evil Queen looming over them, her days lacked excitement. Her parents rarely allowed her to travel along with them on diplomatic missions, for fear of Regina’s henchmen attacking. The only action she participated in was sparring with her trainers and her father and the occasional tracking, simply for fun, with her mother. Sneaking out of the castle was nothing new to Emma.

No, the thrill of that had long ago worn off. Sneaking out to meet a man though, and not just any man but the son of The Dark One, was exhilarating. She was young and naive; he was handsome and so very charming. Being with him was electrifying.

They spent a lot of time together, hiding amongst the trees. He would regale her with tales of different times and far off lands, of ogre wars and boys that never aged. Although he always tried to put a light spin on his past, she could feel the bitterness hidden behind his captivating words.

Looking back on it, it was the pain that really endeared her to him. And it was the pain that drove them apart.

Things went south when he began to suspect his father knew of his whereabouts. He asked Emma to help him procure an item from the castle that he could use in trade of a magic bean. He claimed to know a person from his childhood that would be willing to give up anything for a vial of squid ink.

He begged her to help him so they could run away together—find happiness in another land, far out of reach of his father.

It might have been tempting, the promise of adventure and freedom if it didn’t mean giving up her family. The thought of leaving behind her parents and kingdom—people who loved and supported her, people she had a duty to protect and serve—was unimaginable and the thought of betraying them even worse.

Neal didn’t understand her resistance, only associating parents with heartache and betrayal, he couldn’t understand the loyalty she felt. Because he couldn’t understand her reasoning, couldn’t understand her, their relationship ended in a blowout of epic proportions leaving her with a bruised heart and a distrustful mind.

Time moved on and she put the past and their romance behind her. She grew older and gained insight on their relationship that could only come with age. She realized how much older he had been than her and how wrong that had been at such a juvenile stage of her life. She came to see just how unfair, how irreverent he had been to ask what he did of her, knowing he was the first man she had ever been with and how easily susceptible she was to the lure of the unknown.

She moved on and she managed to keep him from her mind for years. Once her heart was sufficiently mended and her walls built high, she allowed herself zero thoughts of the man.

Until he reconciled with his father.

Everyone in the Enchanted Forrest heard the news of the harmony that had been reached between Rumpelstiltskin and his estranged son. Her mother and father, none the wiser to the liaison that occurred between Neal and herself, celebrated. Being sympathetic people and knowing it could have been them who lost a great deal of time with their child, they were happy for the father and son.

That was until Rumpelstiltskin called upon them, requesting a favor and offering to ensure the safety of their kingdom, a liberation they had been seeking since a time before she was conceived. He promised to aid them with one simple thing in return, that Emma marry his son.

Her parents repudiated the proposition, not wanting to force their daughter into what they imagined to be a loveless marriage. They were Snow White and Prince Charming, their true love the stuff of legends. Who were they to deny their daughter the freedom of obtaining a spectacular love of her own?

Emma was utterly grateful for her them in that moment, regarding them in the highest esteem for their selflessness and bravery. She loved them and admired them and she wanted to be like them. And that was why, knowing how long they’d fought and how weary they must have grown trying to keep their kingdom safe, never fully at peace, she accepted the offer.

The reptilian man had been giddy, promising to get the affair in order as soon as possible and then disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

That was what lead her to where she is today, walking down the aisle on her father’s arm, to a man she does not love, a man she no longer even particularly likes. But with the comfort of knowing that her kingdom is safe and no longer under the thumb of the threat of Regina.

Neal smiles at her softly, eyes glittering brightly in a way that used to fill her stomach with butterflies but now makes it churn with dread.

When her father kisses her hand and puts it in Neal’s she feels tears well in her eyes (and oh, they’re not the tears she expected on her wedding day) but she grits her teeth and wills them away, refusing to let the emotions overcome her for fear that she’ll never recover. Her lips quiver and she sets them firmly in what she hopes passes for a grin.

She feels her resolve settle in place as the officiant begins speaking and she’s sure she’ll get through this. She nods along to the words and smiles in the appropriate places and she’s almost there.

But then he slips through the doors at the end of the hall and walks calmly to the back of the seats. That mad, mad fool. She could just throttle him. How willfully ignorant he must be to walk into the wedding of the son of the man who will rip out his heart and gleefully crush it on sight.

She wants to kill him herself for the lack of regard he shows for his own life.

“I’m a survivor, love,” he’d once told her, a resplendent smile on his face. Well, buddy, you’re doing a piss-poor job of showing it.

She tries to put her focus back into the ceremony taking place, to keep the attention of the crowd off the asinine pirate that just arrived. She attempts to concentrate if not on Neal, then the officiant. She really does try.

But her mind has been spun into a whorl, rivaling the vortex of a portal upon water, and all she can think about his him. Unbidden, their past and what could have been their future flashes before her eyes.

The day they met, not even a year to the date, she was reading peacefully in the castle’s private library when suddenly a figure came tumbling, none too elegantly, through one of the arched, stained glass windows. She was alone and unarmed, in a tower far from any hearing ears.

As she prepared to run, he righted himself and—expecting an immediate threat, likely with the hook attached to his arm—surprised her by simply taking a step back, brushing his dark hair out of his vision, and muttering “Bloody, hell,” eyes wide and brows nearly in his hairline.

“Whatever you want,” she said haughtily, lifting her shoulders and tilting her chin up, “I’m sure could be achieved without breaking through the window.”

“Ah,” he’d sighed, scratching behind his ear in a way entirely too endearing for a pirate who had just forced his way into the walls of the royal family. “That might work if I were a man of your lands and better yet if I weren’t the captain of a notorious pirate ship.”

“Have you been accused of piratery by our kingdom before?”

He paused, narrowing his, unfortunately, (for her) startling blue eyes and rubbing his stubbled chin.

“No, actually.” “Well then, if you had only been more familiar with the laws of my kingdom,” she scolded with crossed arms and if he hadn’t come to the realization of who she was before, he had at that point “you would have known that we harbor no ill will towards pirates who have not… conducted their business in this land.”

He smirked slowly eyeing her up in down in a way entirely to indecent for anyone regarding the crown princess of Misthaven and drew her attention to the fact that the way her arms crossed put her chest on full display for his lascivious gaze. She pulled her arms down instead, putting her hands in a stern position on her hips.

“I see. I guess I’ll be on my way out the window and trying my luck through the front doors. That is if you’d be so kind as to let this indiscretion slide.”

She shouldn’t have, let it slide that is, but it was immensely refreshing to be spoken to with a lack of utmost respect. No one dared to address her without an abundance of reverence and it grew tiresome to be treated as an object held high up on a pedestal, out of reach of anyone below.

So she let him go on his way with the assumption that he would either get what he wanted or not but would most certainly leave, never to be seen again. How wrong she had been. And how grateful she was to have been wrong.

Her parents agreed to give him the squid ink he requested but not without something in return. She had thought her parents foolish to give him his half before securing theirs but they showed to her to never doubt their excellent judge of character. Apparently, there truly is honor among thieves, at least this particular thief, because he remained in their employ, given free reign of travel as long as he obtained something for them in return, after receiving the object of his desire.

Being in their employ lead to him being around her. Being around her lead to lead to him charming her. And charming her lead to him bedding her.

All of this done despite her attempts to keep him from doing just that. He had simply just been too much for her to keep at bay. Too handsome, too smart, too charismatic, too amusing, too passionate. The list goes on and on with too many too’s. The pirate captivated her with his sinfully good looks and piercing blue eyes, he enchanted her with his wit and spirit.

The first night he’d slipped into her room—as she laid beneath the covers staring up at her ceiling and imagining she was gazing upon the stars in the sky, from aboard the deck of The Jolly Roger—she’d been utterly helpless to do anything but draw him into her bed, strip him bare, and ride him into oblivion.

After that first, wild night of unbridled passion, they began an illicit love affair that started out as simple lust and mind-numbing pleasure but soon turned into feelings stronger than anything she’d ever felt before.

They spent as many nights as they could together. Some nights he would sneak through the window of her room and they’d roll around in her bed for hours on end. Other nights she would slip out of the castle to the Jolly where they spent more time on the deck than in his cabin, laying on the cool wood as he pointed out his favorite constellations and entertained her with the legends behind him.

He told her that the set of stars that aligned to create the Cygnus were his favorite. He said it was the most magnificent thing he’d ever seen, that was until he met her. On nights when he was in a deeply amorous mood, he would call her his swan, tell her that there must have been a marvelous constellation that disappeared from the sky on the night of her birth because she was made up of the most brilliant stars.

She planned on hiding it from her parents, knowing her father would threaten him bodily harm and that her mother would actually follow through on it. She was fine keeping it a secret, preferring a love that she could have in the dark of night than one to mourn. She thought she would never tell another soul until, after a particularly gratifying session of face riding on the deck of his ship, he’d turned to her with metaphorical and literal stars in his eyes and said the three little words that brought her walls crashing down to be left in ruins at her feet.

The oddest thing, odder than the princess and her steadfast resistance of any emotional ties dallying with the 300 year old, vengeance bound pirate, was that she believed him. She felt his love in the air around them and with the glow of his eyes and the press of his warm skin against hers.

She couldn’t recall ever feeling so blissfully happy, so content, anywhere with any other person. She vowed to tell her parents after that. Damn the consequences. If they wanted him, they’d have to go through her first because she wasn’t giving him up.

She waited for the perfect moment to tell them but before it arrived, Rumpelstiltskin did, and she made the promise to protect her kingdom at the sake of her own heart.

She knew of his history with the crocodile and the love he’d lost to the imp before. She knew how long he’d fought to avenge his Milah. But she was still surprised by the force of his anger, never having seen anything so strong until she found him in his cabin and told him what she agreed to do. It was equally startling and arousing the way his eyes flamed and his lips curled. She chuckled bitterly against the sour taste of bile rising in her throat when she realized he was the man Neal had spoke of so long ago, the man who was willing to trade a magic bean for squid’s ink, thinking if only she’d met hims sooner.

The argument they’d had was so intense she was amazed they didn’t sink the ship with the force of it. It started off with shouting and throwing things, lasting so long her throat was raw for days, but eventually turned into something much worse, him begging.

She couldn’t bare the pain and fear in his eyes. She couldn’t listen to the way he pleaded with her, that he couldn’t lose her, couldn’t stand for her to live a life of misery under the control of The Dark One and with the man who had betrayed and hurt her before. When he dropped to his knees before her, she lost her resolve and took him to bed.

The love they’d made that night was just that, love, pure and abundant. She laid with him afterward, tucked against his chest and breathing him in, filling her lungs with his scent and her heart with the feel of him. She watched him as he fell asleep quickly. It had always been easy for him to pass into the realm of dreams (something she envied) and that night he had been beyond exhausted, emotionally and physically. She stayed a little longer after his eyes fluttered shut and stayed closed, needing every moment she could take to imprint him and what she felt with him into her very soul.

She couldn’t allow herself to stay long though and careful not to wake him, she detached herself from his embrace to write him a note. She folded it, pressed a kiss against the paper, and then left, not letting herself look back at his sleeping form for fear that she wouldn’t be able to leave.

He’d followed her wishes, or so she thought, to let her go and not seek her out. Yet here he is, in the middle of the damn wedding, sitting casually at the back of the room.

How dare he? How dare he make it that much harder for her to vow her commitment to a man she didn’t want, a man so different from him?

Indignant, she turns her eyes back to the man speaking to the room and before she knows it, Neal is speaking “I, Baelfire take thee Emma to be my wedded wife” and slipping a lavish gold ring on her finger.

The officiant begins speaking to her and she knows what she has to say.

“I, Emma take thee Killian—” and dear god, no, that was not what she was supposed to say. She feels her stomach drop and her limbs turn cold because how had she possibly said the wrong thing? But she knows how, or at least some part of her does, because she said it.

Chaos erupts in the great hall, voices blending together, growing louder by the second. She spots her parents, sitting wide eyed and mouths open, looking aghast. Rumple appears suddenly before her, holding her by the arms and shaking her so forcefully she thinks for sure her head will snap off, demanding “Why did you speak that name? How do you know it?” He searches frantically about the room but doesn’t seem to spot Killian standing halfway down the aisle.

She feels dizzy and ill and thinks she could possibly pass out until Neal steps between her and his father, stopping him from harming her any further.

“I need to speak with Emma alone, papa,” he pleads softly and Rumple’s wild eyes begin to calm.

“The wedding is over. You may all leave,” the manic man announces before disappearing from the room.

Neal grabs her gently by the arm, steering her out of the room. She see’s her mother holding her father back from following. Once alone, he begins running his palms up and down her bare skin and she comprehends that she’s shaking.

“Stop, now,” he commands calmly. “The Emma I know wouldn’t be shaking like this.” “The Emma you know was a 17-year-old girl. You don’t know the Emma I am,” she snaps, hating to be ordered to do anything by anyone other than her parents, least of all this man. But, probably not in the way he hopes, it works. Her anger flares and her limbs settle.

“That’s true. Apparently, I know you even less than I thought because the version of you I know would sooner slit her wrists than take up with a pirate.”

His words don’t sound harsh, just resigned. He knew whom the name she spoke belonged to.

“That is entirely your fault. You left before I grew old enough for you to know a mature me and when you returned you didn’t bother to try and know me again. You simply had you father force me into marriage.” “Technically he didn’t force you,” he begins but stops in his tracks at her icy glare. “Alright. I knew you wouldn’t be able to turn down his offer. If I did learn one thing about you, it’s that you would do anything for your kingdom.”

“You forced my hand.”

“I did,” he concedes.

“How did you expect a marriage to work between us that was created this way?” “I don’t know, Emma… I didn’t think. I just knew that you were the only woman I ever loved and that I missed you. I regretted what happened between us the moment I left. I didn’t just return for my father, I returned for you. I didn’t even willingly tell my father about you. He sensed my dismay and used a truth potion to get it out of me. When he learned, he concocted the plan. He set it in motion.” “I was a child, Neal.” He winces. “You loved a child. And if what you say is true, that you still care about me, you wouldn’t have put me in this position before even trying to learn how I feel.”

He nods slowly and then glances helplessly around the room, running his hands over his head.

“I fucked up.”

“You did.”

“Do you love him?”

He doesn’t need to specify who he is asking about.

“I do.”

“And does he love you? Does he really love you?”

“He does.”

“If I really loved you like I said, I would let you be with him wouldn’t I?”

She doesn’t speak but he’s smart enough to obtain the answer on his own.

“I—I’m sorry, Emma.”

She softens, feeling something loosen in her chest that she hadn’t realized had been tight all these years because she understands that the apology isn’t just for the wedding.

“I’ll convince my father to let it go and not to harm him. Gods, it will be difficult but I’ll do it.”

She’s tempted to tell him that she doesn’t care how difficult it will be for him but she holds her tongue.

“Thank you,” she sighs and presses a fleeting kiss to his cheek before leaving in search of Killian, hearing Neal call for his father to magic him away.

She finds him leaning against the wall outside the room she and Neal had been talking in and he opens his mouth to say something, but she doesn’t find out what because before he can, she launches herself at him, latching her lips onto his.

He kisses her back greedily, nothing but wetness and battling tongues and clashing of teeth. His hands roam all over her, unable to pick one place to settle. After a while, the kiss slows and eventually he pulls back to gaze at her in wonderment.

“You recognized me,” he says pupils blown wide and a breathtaking grin on his face.

“Of course I did. It’s only been a few days.”

“No you don’t understand,” he explains running his hands up and down her arms and the sensation is so different from the way Neal had been doing it only moments before. “I’m wearing a protective charm that hides my appearance.”

“From everyone?” she asks, puzzled as to how she sees him as him.

“Yes, it changes the appearance to everyone… except those the wearer shares true love with.”

She comprehends now, his excitement and awe at her recognizing him.

“Oh,” she says simply.

He kisses her again, joyously. Then he moves his mouth all over her face, peppering it with kisses only interrupted by his repeated words of “I love you.”

She’s dizzy again, not for the first time today but the first time for a good reason. She stops the assault of his lips by grabbing his face between her hands. She looks him in the eyes and says, “I love you, too.”

“Well, clearly, love or you wouldn’t even know who I am right now. I’d just be some mad stranger attacking you with kisses.”

She’s overwhelmed with elation, having thought she would never experience his humor again and instead of commenting back she kisses him once more.

When they get their fill of each other—or at least enough to hold them off til they can speak with her parents—and break apart she remembers something she’d thought of when he first walked in on the wedding.

“Oh, thank the gods, you fool.” She smacks him on the chest with the hand not clutched in his own.

“What?”

“I’d thought you’d walked in with the risk of Rumpelstiltskin seeing you.”

“No, love, I hadn’t intended for anyone to see me,” he stops their walking and pulls his hand from hers to run it through her hair, reverently. “I just couldn’t bare to let you go without seeing for certain, with my own two eyes that you wouldn’t be mine.”

How could a pirate be so romantic?

“If you saw, would you have let me go?”

“No.”

“No?”

He shakes his head and gives her a rueful grin.

“A man unwilling to fight for what he wants deserves what he gets,” he intones.

“I’m what you want?”

“Aye.”

In the end, it takes a lot less convincing of her parents than she thought it would. They had just been so happy for their daughter to find true love they couldn’t be bothered much to care who with.

“Maybe you’ll grow on me,” her father mused, looking like that’s the last thing that would happen.

Their engagement is short (not as short and her one with Neal but that was hastened by Rumple) lasting only a couple months, and only that long so her mother can plan a wedding she deems appropriate.

By the time her father walks her down the aisle, again, her pirate has grown on him.

It’s the strangest feeling, doing a wedding a second time but with entirely different circumstances. The feeling of dread and nausea she felt before, is replaced with excitement and elation. When her father goes to hand her off, she practically jumps out of his arms, to Killian.

She can feel the wild grin splitting her cheeks and the moisture welling in her eyes, good tears this time, wonderful tears, but like before she tries to keep them at bay. When she meets Killian’s eyes, he’s looking at her as if she hung the moon in the sky and he gives her a wink.

She feels incredibly impatient. The officiant can’t talk fast enough for her. She just wants the ceremony to be over so she can be married to her damn pirate already, so she can take him back to his ship.

When Killian slips a simple gold ring on her right hand, it feels so right to look into her true loves eyes and be able to rightfully say, “I, Emma take thee Killian.”

#i'm terribly sorry if this is riddled with typos but here it is!!!#captain swan #cs ff #cs au #i love captain duckling #my fic #idk why this has the feel of a shitty romance novel to me but *shrugs*#god i love that episode #cs fanfiction

156 notes · View notes

flslp87 · 7 years

Photo

Having a baby can bring every emotion from exhilaration to terror. Come along on the journey with Emma and Killian as they experience all the emotions that creating a new life can elicit. Chapter 1- Pregnant -Emma’s POV - here, Chapter 2 - Pregnant - Killian’s POV - here, Chapter 3 - First Doctor’s Visit - Emma’s POV - here, Chapter 4 -First Doctor’s Visit- Killian’s POV - here, Chapter 5 -Heartbeat - Emma’s POV - here, Chapter 6 - Heartbeat - Killian’s POV - here ; Chapter 7 - First Movement - here; Chapter 8 - Ultrasound - here; Chapter 9 - Cravings - here; Chapter 10 - Delivery - here.

Can be found on FF. Net and AO3.

word count ~4600 Rating - K+

Killian looked out the window, watching his Swan climb into that yellow contraption she liked and drive off down the road. Sighing at her stubbornness, he turned to the kitchen where Henry was finishing his usual morning Pop-Tarts, "You need anything else, lad?"

"She okay?" he asked instead.

"Aye lad, she's fine. Just being Emma."

"Stubborn, you mean?"

Killian laughed, "That she is, but I was thinking more along the lines of 'savior' Emma. The Emma who doesn't like to burden others with what she perceives as a problem."

Henry sat there a minute contemplating what had been said and finally as if accepting there was nothing he could do, cleaned up his plate and ran upstairs to get his things for school.

Killian wiped down the table, grabbed his jacket and walked the lad to the bus stop. "See you after school," he called as Henry climbed on.

As the bus drove around the bend, Killian felt a vibration in his pocket and pulling out his phone, was surprised to see Emma's mother's picture flashing on the screen. "Milady, is there trouble?"

"No, Killian, nothing like that. I just wanted to tell you what happened with Emma as she just left Granny's."

"How was her appetite today? Lately, it's been hit or miss, with days where she eats well and then turns a pale shade of green and dashes off to the lavatory.”

Snow clucked sympathetically, "Poor thing. Well if it's anything like when I was carrying Neal, it will last a few more weeks. Just continue doing what you're doing."

After saying their goodbyes Killian hung up the phone and started walking toward the docks, deciding a day spent on the Jolly Roger was just what he needed. As he walked he thought back on what Whale had reminded him of outside of Granny's one day over a month ago

......Just remember that this medication may negate any oral protection so to be safe, you may want to take other precautions during relations....

And they had, mostly. However, if he were honest with himself, there were a few times when they were out of the house and they were in too much of a hurry to give it more than a passing thought. Maybe he should have tried harder to remember, but this was Emma, and he had never been good at resisting her. Perhaps they had known what might happen and hadn't cared. Whatever the reason, he couldn't regret any action on their part. The only regret was the fear he suspected was holding his Swan back from acceptance. Thinking a gentle push might be necessary, he set about making a plan. He was a pirate after all. cs~cs~cs

His phone rang again just as he had climbed onto the Jolly Roger and was staring out to sea, but this time it was Emma's father's face blinking at him, "Dave, you calling to report on my wife too?"

David laughed, "Actually I am. I think today is worse than other days this week. It's a good thing I've been through this before as she's a might scary."

"Aye, my wife has a formidable temper. How do you think she came by that?"

"Touché Hook. But that's not why I called. Emma's in the bathroom again, been in there every day this week. What are you going to do about it?"

"I plan to give her a little push in hopes that she'll share with me."

David started to say something else but suddenly said, "I've got to go - she's coming out now."

Killian turned off the device and forcibly shoved it in his pocket, before kicking a loose pebble across the deck of the ship. He needed her to open up about this, and while he knew she would come to him when she was ready, he hoped it would be soon.

Feeling very grateful that he had confided his fears to her, no, their family and they had been there to give him advice was what had helped him maintain some semblance of normalcy during the past month. What fear Emma must be feeling to keep all this bottled up, he could only imagine, and stress couldn't be good for the baby or for his Swan. Dropping down the stairs into his cabin, he fell onto what had been his bed of many years and recalled that conversation with her father. He had been sitting at the table outside of Granny’s lost in his thoughts when he heard:

"Hook, why are you out here all alone?"

Taking a drink from his flask, which he rarely did these days, he looked up at the prince, and quipped, "Because I'm alone?"

David dropped down into a chair across from him, "I can see that. The question is why are you alone?"

Killian scratched his neck with his hook, "I needed some fresh air," he answered snidely.

Laughing David answered, "First disagreement as a married man?"

"There was no disagreement that I am aware of. One minute Emma was fine and then the next she burst into tears and ran upstairs. When I inquired as to what was troubling her, she yelled go away. I was not aware I had caused her despair.”

David didn't say anything for a moment and then he tossed out there, "Sounds just like her mother when she was pregnant."

Killian's mouth dropped open, "Pregnant?"

"Yes, you know, with child," David started to say before noticing that it hadn't been a question asked to him, but one Hook had been asking himself. "Is it possible?" "You know I'd never kiss and tell," he joked before quieting to think about the possibility. "Should this be true, besides these emotional fluctuations, what else might I notice?"

The prince squirmed on the hard seat, not all that comfortable with the question because while Killian had earned his trust and respect, this was his daughter they were discussing. But taking pity on the man, he began, "If she is like her mother, you will feel like you are constantly into and out of a storm. For the first few months, you will not know how to respond and responses that brought a smile one day might bring tears the next."

"That sounds right and it's bloody awful. What can I do to ease her discomfort?"

David squirmed a little, "That's the frustration for the father. There's not a damn thing we can do now. Just love her and hold her when she allows it. But watch out and not too tight because," and he made a face, "tender parts I was told."

"Aye those I notice when we...,"

"Ah, ah ah, no further, please." He held up his hand to stop the conversation.

"Sorry mate, right." He hesitated and asked quietly, "Is it normal to feel helpless?"

"That's very normal and I'm sure will happen several times over the next few months." He sat there for a few minutes before asking, "Do you think she suspects?"

Killian smiled at him, but by the look in his eyes, he was far away, "Aye I believe she suspects. I've seen her rubbing her stomach, staring at Henry several times, but the look on her face I see is still fear."

"Give her time, Killian. She's come a long way but inside she sometimes still feels like that lost little girl who was too scared to hope."

"I'm a patient man, as you well know. I'll give her all the time she needs." He frowned as he thought of another question. "In this realm, how does one discover they are with child?"

David thought back to his cursed self when Katherine had brought home a test, "There's a little stick that they purchase at the store and it tells them."

Killian frowned, "And just how does a small stick tell them they are with child?"

"That I'm not quite sure about but I hear it's accurate."

"Maybe Emma will look into this. I just hope soon." Killian stood up, "Your information has been most insightful. I thank you."

"No problem. Snow and I consider you family. Let us know if we can be of help." Killian remembered thinking about what he had learned from his talk with Emma's father. That his happy ending was no longer just about having Emma and her family, but also about having a child of his own. How did he get so fortunate?

Knowing that Henry would soon be home, Killian made sure the Jolly Roger was secure and made his way home. His agenda for the evening involved giving his Swan some support in hopes that she would let go of her walls and finally share with him so they could celebrate, together. cs~cs~cs

Arriving home just as Henry got off the bus, Killian followed him into the kitchen and watched him search for something to tide him over until time for the evening meal. "Something specific you wish to have for the evening meal?" Henry stopped his scavenging long enough to ponder the question, "Maybe tacos? I know they are easy and Mom usually likes them." That being said, he picked up an apple and a banana and disappeared upstairs with a call me if you need me tossed over his shoulder. Killian was left standing in the kitchen thinking about tacos, and how they had them one night the previous week and that Emma had taken one bite before disappearing into the bathroom. Obviously, baby had issues with them. Should he use them for a subtle push? Hearing her car drive up, he looked out the window to see her lean her head on the steering part of her vessel. "Poor thing," he whispered. "Please Swan, lean on me," he said as she started the walk into the house. Killian met her as she opened the door, "Swan, you're just in time to choose what we have for dinner. I thought chicken, the lad suggested tacos. So, what shall it be?" He knew immediately that the combination turned her stomach as she brushed by him in a hurry to make it to the powder room slamming the door in his face.

Hearing her retching behind the locked door was almost enough to cause him to knock it down but the thought of Emma's reaction should he do that was enough to allow him a simple knock on the door. "Swan?" He called just before she opened the door and walked into his arms. Standing there with her having come to him willingly felt so wonderful, he had to bite his tongue to keep himself from saying something that might upset her. He felt her relax and tightened his hold to keep her upright, but when he heard her hiss in pain, immediately felt guilt and loosened his hold. Leaning back he waited for her to look up, "Emma, your father called earlier today and said you weren't yourself. Don't you think it's time you shared your burden?" Her face immediately took on that caged look and he knew he had pushed too fast tonight, especially when her tears spilled over and she ran up the stairs away from him. Hearing the upstairs door shut and the water turn on, he knew she was climbing into a warm bath to try to soak away her worries and would probably not be back down again. Needing something to do, he settled for warming some soup and making her a sandwich, which he left for her next to their bed. "You may think you can run from this, Swan, but I will always find you," he whispered to the closed bathroom door as he walked back down the stairs. Killian was putting away the remains of the soup when Henry walked into the kitchen, "She’s still not ready to share with you is she?" Killian took a deep breath and after setting a sandwich and milk in front of the lad, sat down next to him, "Aye, lad, she's scared, but she's coming round." "How can you be so sure?" Smiling gently, Killian took a bite of his sandwich so Henry would do the same. Once he swallowed he offered as best an explanation as he could, "When you love someone you just know." "And you really love her, don't you?" "Aye, son, I really do." Henry finished his sandwich and put his plate in the sink. As he turned to walk out of the room, he stopped next to where Killian was sitting, "Mom's going to have a baby isn't she?" Killian's breath caught in his throat, as he knew that Swan would have wanted to be the one to tell him, but when he looked into the lad's concerned face he knew he couldn't keep this from him any longer, "Aye, Henry she is. I'm sorry you had to find out this way as I am sure your mother would have wanted to tell you herself." Killian felt Henry put his hand on his shoulder, "I'm glad I know so I can be here if she needs me." "I know your mother would appreciate hearing that." "Oh, and Killian?" "Aye?" "I'm here for you too, after all, you are family." Killian smiled after the boy as he went back upstairs to finish his homework. He had come a long way in the short time they had known each other. A boy any mother would be proud to call her son. Thinking about Emma's son made him wonder, would his baby be a boy? One with his dark hair, blue eyes, and his Swan's spirit. Or would he have a daughter, a little lass with the blonde hair and green eyes of his Swan? He didn't care as long as he, or she, was healthy. Shutting off the lights, he wearily climbed the stairs to the room he shared with his wife. Seeing that she was asleep in her place in the middle of the bed, he shed his clothes and after climbing into bed, moved behind her and pulled her back against his body and whispered, "I love you, Swan. I’m here for you," before drifting off to sleep.

cs~cs~cs

The next morning, he came awake slowly, and with Emma still asleep slid out of bed and went down to see Henry off to school. Hoping she would sleep a few hours later than normal he was disappointed when he heard the shower start, quickly stop and then heard her walking down the stairs.

"Good morning, love, shall I make you something to eat?"

She looked like she was about to argue with him but finally relented, "Maybe just some dry toast and juice?"

He pulled out a chair for her to sit down, kissed her on the head and went about making her two pieces of dry toast and pouring her a small glass of apple juice since orange seemed to upset her stomach. "Here, Swan, eat up."

Knowing she would be uncomfortable if he were to watch over her too closely, he busied himself around the kitchen but surreptitiously kept an eye on her and was satisfied when she finished her meal without running from the table.

As she got up to leave for the day, he held her coat out and with a hug and a kiss let her go. "Have a good day. Shall I bring you lunch?"

She didn't answer right away, but with reluctance finally responded, "No, that's ok. I might meet my mom for a quick lunch if she's not busy."

"Alright then, you will call me if you change your mind?"

"I will." One last kiss and he let her go, closing the door before she drove off.

She hadn't been gone long when he received a call from an unknown number and when he answered it, Leroy was on the other end. "Pirate, that you?"

"Aye, dwarf, what do you want?"

Grumpy bellowed, "It's the savior. She left town!"

Killian frowned and tried to make sense out of what he was hearing. "Emma's left town?"

"That's what I said. The savior's left town." He shouted again.

Without saying anything else Killian turned off the phone, put it in his pocket and left the house. Why would Emma be leaving Storybrooke? He knew she was scared and that her past self might have tried to run, but the woman she was now wouldn't take that path. His Swan was a fighter, sometimes she just needed a little reminder.

Without realizing where he was headed, he ended up at her parents’ loft. The door opened before he had even knocked and he looked up into the face of Emma's father.

"Killian? What's going on? Come in." David let him in just as Snow was coming down the stairs.

"Killian?" She moved to stand next to her husband.

Killian looked from one to the other, "It's Emma. Leroy called and said she drove out of Storybrooke." He rubbed his hand over his face, before asking with fear in his voice, "Why would she drive out of Storybrooke?"

Snow walked over to him, took his hand in hers and drew him over to the table where she pushed him down into a chair, "Killian, look at me," she said quietly. "She loves you. She loves Henry, and David and I and her life in Storybrooke. There has to be a logical explanation. She'll be back."

The conviction in her voice that there was a good reason for Emma's trip, helped decrease some of the fear he could feel bubbling just under the surface. "Think she could be going to see a doctor?"

"Possible," David told him.

And Snow finished, "But improbable." She smiled at him. "Does she have a lotion or a food that she can only buy outside of town?"

Unable to sit any longer, Killian stood up and moved across the room. "Don't you think I have asked myself that same question?" He leaned against the counter wanting to hit something, but not willing to completely lose his temper at the moment.

The clock ticking in the background reminded him that he had been there a while. "I should go," he started to say, but before he could finish a call came in and seeing that it was Leroy, he quickly answered. As he listened to what the dwarf had to say, he couldn't keep the smile off his face. Hanging up he answered the question before they could voice it, "Emma's back and at the station. Seems Leroy questioned her actions," he smirked at that thought, "but she told him she bought some lady things.”

David kissed Snow, "I'm going to head into the station so I can keep an eye on her." And then he was gone.

"Do you have any idea what she might have picked up?" Killian asked Snow.

She smiled at him, "Let's just say this. I think the time for this family to celebrate is almost here."

"I hope you're right."

"I think I am. Why don't you see what you can do regarding operation Give a Little Push?"

Killian gave her a little bow, "Your advice is much appreciated." He left the loft and on the way home decided that it was time to see what baby thought about grilled cheese and onion rings. Something told him the night would be interesting.

cs~cs~cs

Arriving home, realizing Henry was with Regina for the night, caused him to feel at loose ends. Unable to settle, he found himself roaming through the house, noticing the special touches that Emma had gathered and set around to make it their home, not just her home. Hearing her coming up the front steps, he met her just as she opened the door. "Hello, love," he kissed her gently. Do you feel up to accompanying me to Granny's for our evening meal?" While he waited for her answer he allowed his want and need to reach his eyes, and when she kissed him lightly and responded with, "That sounds great. Let me change," he allowed himself to relax for the first time all day. "Do you need some help?" He wagged his eyebrows at her playfully. Her answer brought a smile to his face and as she ran upstairs to change, he contacted Granny, preordering what normally was her favorite meal, hoping that they could have a relaxing dinner with no interferences. Walking into Granny's they found a booth in the back, and because he had a need to be close to her he slid in next to her instead of across the table. "Oh this is new," she whispered as she leaned her head against his shoulder. Looking into her beautiful face, he noticed she had dark smudges under her eyes and as he rubbed his fingers along her jawline, leaned in to whisper, "I've missed you." He hoped that she understood that his words had many meanings, and not just that he had missed her today. Her smile told him that she understood completely and when she answered he really wanted to kiss her but was interrupted by the arrival of the waitress with their food. Emma looked at her food and then at him, "Wait a minute, I don't remember ordering." Hoping he hadn't overstepped his bounds he responded, "Since you always order the same thing, I called ahead so it would be ready. I hope that's alright." Watching her sit there and stare at the sandwich as if she had never seen one before, he worried. "Eat up, love," he said as he dipped an onion ring in ketchup and ran it along her bottom lip until she opened her mouth and took a bite. When she smiled at him and started chewing, he set the rest on her plate and concentrated on his own food. The meal continued quietly for quite some time, and as she was finishing her sandwich he was feeling confident that this had been a good idea when suddenly she pushed against him, with panic in her voice. "Killian, let me out." He slid out of the booth and held his hand out to her. "Alright, love?" Emma barely glanced at him before turning toward the lady’s room, and tossing over her shoulder, "Fine. I'll be right back." Feeling helpless he made a move to follow her but had only taken a step before, Granny put a hand on his arm, "Stay. I'll check on her." While she was gone, he took care of the bill and waited next to their booth. She looked pale and he wanted nothing more than to take her pain and send it far away, so with a, "Come, Swan, let's get you to bed," he led her out, tossing a silent thank you to Granny as they walked past. Once back home, he stood quietly by as she changed, and after she had climbed into bed, pulled the blanket up around her shoulders. "Sleep, love. I'll just shut off the lights and be right up." Walking back down the stairs, he poured a splash of rum and took it out onto the porch, wondering what he was missing; wondering if she was any closer to allowing him in so they could face their fear together.

cs~cs~cs

Being a light sleeper, he felt Emma lift his arm and slide out of bed. Hearing the bathroom door close, he sat up, pulled on a pair of pajama bottoms he kept next to the bed and walked quietly into the hallway. Deciding to give her a few minutes, he leaned against the wall and waited. When she opened the door, she was pale, scared and in shock, he thought. Seeing him, she backed into the bathroom and pointed down at the stick still on the counter before breathing out quietly, "We're pregnant." Feeling so relieved his knees almost gave way, he smiled at her tenderly and waited for her to find her voice. Thankfully he didn't have to wait long until she asked, "How can you be so calm?" He moved closer to her and pulled her into his arms. "I knew. I was just waiting for you to share." And then he pulled back far enough to see her face, "How do you feel?" "Scared, excited, freaked, elated, panicked, happy, shall I go on?" "Why scared, love?" "Killian what do I know about babies? What's more, what do you know about babies?" Just as he suspected, his brave lass was worried that she might not be able to do something new. “I've never seen you fail, why would you start now? And what we don't know, we'll learn together. Our child is very blessed to have you as its mother." He meant every word he said to her and hoped she knew that he would always be there and she would never be alone. When she started weeping uncontrollably in his arms, he picked her up and carried her to their bedroom. Sitting on the side of the bed, he tucked her body against his and let her release all the fear and anxiety she had been carrying alone for too long. He could tell immediately when she had made peace with her feelings as her body relaxed completely against his. She nuzzled her face into the bend between his neck and shoulder, "When did you know?" His foolish Swan, thinking he wouldn't know when something important was happening with her, he smiled, "Would you believe me if I said I knew right away?" She leaned back in his arms and rolled her eyes, "Seriously? You're going to go with that?" He cupped her jaw, wiping the tears away with his thumb, "You don't think that the father can know these things?" Opening and closing her mouth several times she finally responded, "I'm not even sure when it happened, how can you be?" Pulling her closer against his chest he said quietly, "Remember when you were ill a few months ago and took that pastille that Dr. Whale gave you?" Emma hummed in agreement. "Do you remember what he said to us when he handed me the bottle?" Emma frowned trying to remember the specific words, "Something about being careful, right?" "Aye, love, he said we would have to use extra precautions during relations and I can remember a few times when we..." She put her hand over his mouth before he could elaborate, "I remember those times, they were hot." And when she giggled his heart took flight. "I'm sorry I waited so long to take the test," she continued, "Forgive me for being scared?" "There's nothing to forgive. Are you truly happy?" Her smile told him all he needed to know, but worried about his feelings, she answered, "Are you?" Showing her that he too could be a man of action, he kissed her, pouring all of his love and passion into the kiss as he maneuvered them horizontally. "Having a family with you is something I thought of but never dared to hope would come true. Now shall I show you properly how happy I am?" Waiting not so patiently for her to give him an answer, he kissed her on one cheek and then on the other, before hovering above her lips. Her response had barely left her mouth before his lips met hers and all worries faded for both as time stood still in their little corner of the world.

~fin

#cs ff #captain swan ff canon #cs baby #cs pregnancy #cs mafia

158 notes · View notes