#he doesn't hate his demon half and he doesn't struggle to control it
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How exactly is Subhuman lyrical character assassination for Dante?
Ok. I'm not looking forward to writing this but…
So you've probably seen that there are some mixed opinions on this particular song, so allow me to clarify. I would like to preface this by stating that Subhuman is one of the few things in the world that I feel genuine hatred toward, which is either amusing to think about or outright pathetic. I actually can't listen to any part of the song without feeling anxiety or anger. As such, I have avoided listening to the song again.
First of, lets talk about the original version of the song. The original was sung by suicide silence, who at one point a popular deathcore band until the death of their main vocalist, after which they spiraled into disaster and alienating their fan base. Their version on the song, without exaggeration, sounded like pigs squealing. High pitched, badly mixed music by a washed out band who's new main vocalist also happened to be a pedo. These factors culminated into the song, upon being released, getting over 13,000 dislikes before the video was deleted from YouTube. Seriously, when people first did listens like you do they were, at best, laughing.
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So they replace the vocalist, problem solved right? No. This is actually the second attempt by composer cody matthew johnson at a theme for Dante, the first being a remix of Devils Never Cry for Marvel vs Capcom Infinite, and is largely considered the worst and only bad version of the song. And when advertising this song on his website, he advertised it as the theme of "the foul mouthed anti-hero" Dante, AKA reboot Dante.
In other words, he made it for the wrong character. Johnsons reaction to the backlash was to throw a tantrum and saying he's "happy to stir the pot", ignoring the fact that the original version was actually painful to listen to (this isn't hyperbole, seriously don't take my word for it and listen to the original version and you'll get what I mean) and the fact that it was sung by a pedophile. Recently he also related the backlash he got to the abuse targeted at actress Lily Gao for her performance in the Resident Evil 4 remake, which is deeply insulting considering she was subjected to racist abuse and harassed off social media.
And even then, the song itself good for what it's supposed to be. As a character theme, it's character regression for Dante. It's an angry, spiteful song that goes on about how Dante struggles with this evil inside him, how he hates all demonkind and how he's a rage filled monster that tears through everything in his way. But that's not Dante. At one point, Dante did have anger towards demons and hate that part of himself, but his character ark in Devil May Cry 3 was accepting that part of himself and growing as a person. DMC3 is a prequel, mind you. In universe, he got over those feelings over 25 years ago.
When faced with demons, he often offers to show them mercy even if they don't accept, because he knows that just as any human can do evil, any devil can do good. He spares Trish in DMC1, a demon created for the sole purpose of killing him, and in turn she becomes his trusted friend. In DMC2, he refuses to let Lucia kill herself because her fear of hurting humans proves she's not a monster to him. In the anime, he's hired to kill a demon called Brad and instead finds him in a bar, talks with him to figure out what his deal was, and then helped Brad protect his human girlfriend and kill his demonic master. In fact, he's far more merciful to demonic enemies than his human ones, who he kills without ever offering mercy, because at its core those that give up their humanity are worse than those that never had it to begin with.
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That's mainly it. The thesis statement of the entire series is this - The human ability to care for others, to love someone, be it family, friend, or romance. If you care enough to cry, THAT is what makes you human. Dante is powerful not just because of the demonic power of his father, but because of the human heart of his mother. He is the son of both Sparda and Eva, and he's proud of that. But the very title of subhuman contradicts the entire point of the series. It implies he is less than human, but he's not more human or more demon, he's both, and that's the point of him as a character. Vergil rejected his humanity, while Dante embraced it. He's reached an equilibrium in his soul and grown as a person, embodying both worlds as a devil with ability to cry. Subhuman doesn't focus on Dante's humanity at all, it's all about how he's inhuman.
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You remember how in Devils Never Cry the harder and softer lyrics are separate and initially clash, representing his demon and human halves, but in the end they come together into a singular song, representing Dante's acceptance of both sides of himself. There's none of that nuance in this song.
And removing the character assassination, it's just not a good representation of Dante. As I said it feels angry and violent, but Dante is charming and stylish. Of course he does have some resentment to aspects of his life, at times wishing he could have a normal life, but he enjoys what he's got. With the other character themes, the lyrics feel like something the characters would say in battle; With Devil Trigger, I can see Nero smirking and shouting "Bang, bang, bang! Pull my devil trigger!" as he throttles his sword as his enemies charge at him. With Crimson Cloud, V talking in poetry all the time so "Saviour! Bloodstain! Hellfire! Shadow! Heaven on a landslide!" sounds like something he'd read out to himself as his demons tore up the battle. And with Bury the Light, Vergil would totally proclaim "I am the storm that is approaching!" before unleashing a devastating attack.
But with Dante, who taunts by throwing a rose at his enemies, laughing and pointing, and playfully beckoning at his enemies to keep trying their best, I can't see that person screaming at the top of their lungs in fury "YOU CANNOT KILL ME!" Dante isn't someone who feels the need to prove anything to himself or his enemies. It's part of his charm that powerful demons will fight him, expecting a respectful battle with the son of the legendary Sparda, but instead they get their ass beat by an idiot more interested in seeing what he can do with a hodgepodge of weapons than taking things seriously. And when he does get serious, it's more quite, closer to "you've got my attention and I'll make you regret it." It's too insecure. A better line would be something like "Just try to kill me!" but even then, it's still screaming. There's no subtlety here.
None of this is helped by the fact that the song is so plodding. The low BPM makes it feel plodding, and while I'm certainly no expert on music that sort of feeling hurts in a game as fast as DMC, especially for Dante, who while not as fast as Vergil is by far the most chaotic character to play as. Teleporting, swapping guns, swapping weapons, swapping styles, Dante has over 100 potential actions that can loop into each other freely. Subhuman doesn't capture how chaotic it feels to play as Dante. It's going for the power fantasy of Kratos, an unstoppable juggernaut as opposed to the power fantasy of a stylish showdown. You don't play as Dante to strike fear into demonkind, you play him to see just what bullshit you can get away with even in the most dire situations.
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That is ultimately why Subhuman fails and betrays Dante as a character.
I'll admit, from my personal experience I tried everything to get myself to like the song. I listened to every edit trying to salvage it, every version that changed it up, all hoping that Dante would get the theme he deserved. But I think that's why I hate it so much now. I desperately wanted it to be good. But at it's core, the song is fundamentally flawed it what it sets out to do, represent Dante as a character, and it needed a full overhaul that was never realistic within the time frame of it being revealed to the public and the games release. Honestly, after what he did to Devils Never Cry they should never have given Dantes theme to someone as inexperienced as cody and his works before and since have been middling at best. But he was the real thing that killed subhuman for me. Anyone that listened to the original version knows it was BAD, but he acted like he was a visionary who was too smart for the rest of us and ignoring all criticism including, need I remind you, HIRING A PEDOPHILE. The recent thing with Lily Gao I find particularly infuriating because what she has been going through is unquestionably awful, yet he made it about himself. As if a white composer who complained about the whole thing on twitter suffered the same abuse as an asian woman who was chased off social media. That inability to self reflect on anything and blaming everyone that disagrees with you is just arrogance in the end.
I always get really angry whenever I think about this song. If I had the same passion for writing things I actually cared about I'd be an acclaimed author by now. I don't like how much I think about this song so much. As I said at the state hating a song this much is either amusing or pathetic. But Dante is a character that holds a certain importance for who I am so I care more than I should. I know not everyone had the same experience I have, or don't really care about the music so long as the game is fine, but the music in Devil May Cry has always been spectacular, and the character themes have been brilliant ways to prove who the characters are deep down. So for Dante, the face of the series, to be stuck with the worst one in the entire series in the grand return of the series until the next game comes around… it's fucking infuriating.
#devil may cry#dmc#subhuman#why subhuman sucks ass#took me long enough to answer this#copy and pasted from somewhere else#Dante isn't an angry or hateful person#he doesn't hate his demon half and he doesn't struggle to control it#he doesn't resent who he is#he doesn't see himself as subhuman#dante is the son of sparda and eva#that's why subhuman is shit#i will never not shit on subhuman
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hi! could u perhaps write about mc accidentally finding out about the boys’ hard limits? like, just something that triggers their fight or flight response. maybe like inflecting severe pain or something. idk… thank you and sorry if u can’t!
Summary: Reader finds out where their demons' hard limits lie.
Warning/kinks: Degradation, Mirror play, bondage, sensory deprivation, punishment, spanking (with your hand and with a paddle), public play (? You're at an orgy, so everyone around you is consenting), food play, safeword use. In general, there's some panic on the boys' part as they realize that they don't like what you're doing. Along with some of them holding in their safeword for a bit, but you reprimand them for it.
Word count: 8,500+
Reader is completely gender natural and their genital isn't described.
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Lucifer:
You know that Lucifer has complicated feelings when it comes to his body. He hates that he's missing a set of wings, but he wouldn't go back in time and stop himself from tearing them out. Yet his preference towards wearing as many layers as possible stems from more of a fear of being vulnerable than a lack of confidence in his body.
If anything, he's a bit overconfident in his physical appearance, if someone were to ask you.
("Is it really overconfidence, or simply knowing what I'm worth?"
"It's overconfidence Luci, my beautiful stupidity prideful demon.")
Using mirror play in the bedroom has proven to be an excellent way to break down Lucifer's walls. Whenever the demon struggled to get into subspace all it took was bringing out a mirror and having him nakedly kneel in front of it while you remained fully clothed for him to fall straight into subspace.
Something about him being so vulnerable while you remained untouched and fully clothed did something to him. Made him feel small and submissive. You didn't quite understand, but you definitely saw the appeal.
So, when Lucifer struggled to get into subspace one evening. When collars and putting him over your knee didn't do the trick, you brought out the mirror. It was full length and wide, able to reflect nearly half of the entire room, but you doubt that Lucifer would pay much attention to anything besides you or himself.
As you place Lucifer in front of the mirror he snaps at you, barring his teeth into a snarl and you know that tonight is going to be a difficult fight of trying to get him to relax enough to slip into subspace.
That proves true when you watch Lucifer struggle to fall into subspace. His pride battling his desire to be vulnerable and let you take control, you watch as he relaxes, before tensing up and snarling, before relaxing again, creating a vicious cycle.
Determined to break it, you decide to try something else that always makes Lucifer squirmy and lightheaded:
Degradation
"God, you're pathetic," you hiss as you pace around the demon. "Look at you, snarling at your own reflection like a wild animal. You know, sometimes I think you're no better than a wild animal with how much you fly off the handle."
Lucifer blushes at your words, but his pride is still roaming, and it doesn't let himself relax just yet.
"How dare-"
"Shut up!" You snap, wrapping a hand around Lucifer's mouth to silence him.
"Shut your dirty, lying, cheating mouth! How dare you think you can talk like you have something worthwhile to say."
Lucifer's breath catches in his throat, as the haze of vulnerability starts to creep up on him. Seeing his desire spark in his eyes you smirk and continue.
"Come on Luci. We both know that you never said anything worthwhile in your life. That at the end of the day, you're worthless. No, no, you're less than worthless. You only seem to make everything worst, don't you?"
Lucifer feels his pride crumble at your words, washing away as he starts to feel truly insignificant.
"You can never do anything right, can you? Not for Diavolo, not for your brothers, and certainly not for me."
The mention of disappointing Diavolo and his brothers strikes something inside of Lucifer, something he wasn't prepared to feel. Yet before he can examine what he's feeling, you continue.
"You're constantly fucking up, disappointing everyone around you. I wonder how long it'll be before everyone around you sees what I see. Do you know what I see Luci?"
Breath catching in his throat, Lucifer shakes his head.
You raise his chin with your index finger and direct it to the mirror, and Lucifer flinches when he sees himself.
He knows he would look vulnerable, and normally he would take great delight in how small and weak he looks compared to you, but coupled with your words, instead of feeling small and submissive and safe in your gaze, he feels like dirt. Normally when he drops down into subspace he feels soft and cared for, now he can't help but feel worthless and exposed.
Your sneer doesn't help as you take in the kneeling demon.
"Ugh, look at you. Can you believe that you used to be considered the star of the Celestial Realm?" You grab onto Lucifer's chin and force him to look at himself in the mirror.
"Well, can you?" You demand.
"N-no." He asks barely a whisper as tears spring to his eyes.
Immediately your hand drops from his chin as you stare at your demon in alarm. You're used to Lucifer being shy, especially as you break his pride down, you're used to his tears, but you never heard your demon sound so broken before.
"Luci, darling, are you ok?" You ask softly.
"I, I can't believe that I used to be the star of the Celestial Realm, Master. I am, sniff, I am worthless." Lucifer ignores your concern as he continues to cry, tears dripping down his cheeks.
Immediately you wrap your arms around him and pull him into your chest. "Hey, hey, shhhhh. It's ok baby. I don't think you're worthless. Demonus, ok? Demonus, the scene is done, it's over." You repeat your safeword a few times so Lucifer knows that the scene is over.
As you continue to hold Lucifer against you, mumbling praise and assurances slowly the demon starts to calm down. When his tears finally stop he leans away from you for a moment to catch his breath.
"Sorry, I- sorry. I don't know what came over him." He says, looking everywhere but your face or the mirror.
"It's ok sweetheart, you know you never have to apologize for needing to stop the scene. You know that right?"
"Yes, I'm aware. I just, didn't expect to react that way."
"If you're willing, do you mind telling me what caused it?"
Lucifer sighs and collapses back into your hold, and you think for a moment that he's going to shrug the whole scene off, but after a beat of silence he answers:
"It was the degradation. Normally I like it, love it even. But as I fell into subspace, hearing you talk about me like that made me feel vulnerable, and not in a good way."
Blinking, you will your tears away for now. Later, when tensions are lower, and everything isn't so raw the two of you will have a more in-depth conversation about this and will be able to apologize. Now your demon needs you.
"Thank you so much for telling me, baby. I just want you to know that I didn't mean a word of what I said. I, and I'm sure everyone else, rely heavily on you. We don't think you're worthless at all."
"I know," Lucifer states, a bit of his prideful overconfidence returning.
"Now, why don't the two of us stop laying on the floor and listen to a few of my records instead? I got this new one that curses those who listen to it to sing until their throat bleeds." Lucifer stands, reaching out a hand to pull you up.
It's a bit silly, seeing the still naked demon being so confident, but you hold all teasing remarks as you follow along.
-
Mammon:
You wanted to do so much to Mammon that it became a question of not what you'll do to him, but what he'll allow you to do to him.
And it turns out Mammon will allow you to do a lot.
Hence the list. After a very exciting night of thinking about every fantasy, kink, and wet dream you ever had, you came up with a list of what you wanted to do with Mammon, and are currently in the process of working through that list.
A lot of things on the list Mammon never tried (or heard about) before, which took a lot of talking, and a lot of easing him into certain kinks. The very kink you're trying out tonight being one he never tried before.
You gather up everything you'll need for tonight. A blindfold, noise-canceling headphones, and a pair of chains. You're a bit excited that the blindfold and headphones are magic, meaning that cut off all light and noise, as it was basically impossible to find a human realm blindfold that blocks out all light.
You could tell Mammon was getting excited too by the way he keeps eyeing the items, but in his usual Mammon way, he keeps that fact to himself.
It's adorable how he rushes to lay against the headboard at your command, as he's usually a bit of a brat and drags his feet before obeying your orders.
The chains are the first thing to go, seeing as Mammon and you were intimately familiar with them. As you lean over to secure the right cuff Mammon steals a kiss, leaning upward his lips ghosts over your cheek. With a grin, you pin him to the bed.
"Greedy boy~ we haven't even gotten started and yet you're already teasing."
"Guess it's just in my nature to be a little greedy." He teases back.
Rolling your eyes you give him one last real kiss on the lips before cuffing him to the bedframe. As you back to enjoy your work you can't help but feel giddy.
Pulling out the blindfold and headphones you turn to your demon with a grin as you present them both to him.
"Blindfold or headphones first?"
Mammon looks a bit caught off guard at being asked his preference, before eyeing them both critically. After a beat, he answers: "The headphones, I want the extra time to see you."
You huff at the flirt, not believing just how bold your demon can get under the right circumstances. (The circumstances being chained to the bed as you lay on top of him.) Leaning down you place the headphones around his ears and give him a moment to adjust.
"Wow, this is really weird! Woah! I can't even hear my voice! Am I being loud? I feel loud!"
Rolling your eyes you lean down and tap Mammon twice against the forehead - the signal you two came up with when you want to check in.
"I'm really to go! Just give me one last moment to look into your eyes -" Mammon stares into your eyes unblinking for a solid five seconds "- I'm good to go!"
Wrapping the blindfold around his head you plunge your demon into darkness.
And it is incredibly weird for Mammon. As a demon he has pretty good night vision, so even in complete darkness he can make out shapes pretty well. So being in complete darkness takes him a moment to get used to.
The warmth of your body grounds him, and it doesn't take long before he's relaxing into the plush bed.
Shimmy downwards, you try to make yourself comfortable sitting between Mammon's legs, sitting right in front of his cock. Leaning down you give the half hard cock a puff of air and watch as Mammon jumps at the sensation.
"Th-that felt weird. It felt like, a lot? Even though it was so little?" Mammon mumbles, and you wonder if you're going to get a rubbing commentary the entire night.
Maybe you should have added a gag to your myriad of tools.
Wrapping your hands around your demon's dick you begin to slowly pump it. Mammon gasps at the feeling, before moaning and leaning into your touch. Your touch is light and extremely slow, but the demon has always been extremely sensitive and it doesn't take much before he's nearly spilling.
"I'm cumming-"
Your hands fly away at his words, and he growls in annoyance. With a grin, he can't see you bounce off of the bed and begin looking through your toy chest. Normally Mammon would be peaking over, curious about what you'll pick out. But seeing as he can't currently do that, you grin as you realize that you're going to completely surprise him with whatever you pick.
As Mammon comes down from his high he realizes that you're no longer on the bed. The warmth he previously felt emulating from you is gone, and his heart quickens as he realizes that he's alone.
"Hey, what's the big idea? Where'd you go?" Mammon calls out.
You roll your eyes at the dramatics, too busy with shifting through the toy box. "In a minute, Mamms, I'm just getting a few toys." You answer, half forgetting that he can't currently hear. Mammon was just so loud, so responsive, that you momentarily let it slip from your mind that he didn't actually expect a response from you, and couldn't receive one.
Mammon tries his best to calm down. Surely you're just messing with him, right? Wanting to make him crack and beg for your touch? You do like to make him beg. Yup, that's it. You were just teasing him.
You are still definitely in the room with him.
Right?
Seconds become minutes to Mammon as he strains his ears to hear you. Normally he knew exactly where you were and what you were doing, even when he was kneeling and staring at the ground his demon senses allow him to hear everything. Now he has no idea where you are or what you're doing.
"Ok, fine, fine! I give! Can you please touch me?" Mammon whines.
Picking up the fleshlight you want to use on him you intend to do just that. Only to realize that the demon forgot to clean it. Gagging you put the toy aside to clean later, and decide to punish your demon by continuing to ignore him by looking through the toy box.
"Come on, please." His voice takes on a real edge of desperation as he starts to spiral.
What if you left? What if you got bored of him and decided that you didn't want to play with him anymore? Is he all alone, begging to an empty room because he wasn't good enough? He begins to fight against his chains in earnest now, instead of the teasing, testing pulls he's used to. But he finds that they're locked up tight and that he can't break out of them.
Will you hear his safeword if he says it?
Finally finding a suitable and clean toy you stand up and stretch. Glancing over at your boyfriend, you notice that he's strangely calm as he's no longer begging or struggling against the chains. You believe that he's just pouting and the second you touch him he'll start whining about you taking forever.
Before you can reach him, Mammon mumbles out a soft, broken, "Goldie".
Dropping the toy in your hand you rush over to him and immediately remove the headphones before moving onto the blindfold.
"Hey, hey it's alright. I'm right here." You mumble, hands shaking as you lean up to undo the cuffs.
Mammon has never safeworded before, and you're kinda panicking at the moment, but you do your best to remain calm as you rush to take off the chains.
The second Mammon lays eyes on you he lunges at you, pinning you to the bed in a hug. His arms are firm, yet they shake as they hold you. It takes you a moment to realize that the wetness you feel on your neck is from Mammon, but once you do you coo in sympathy.
"I thought you left me," Mammon whispers into your chest.
Blinking back tears you lean down to kiss the demon's forehead.
"I would never leave you alone like that Mamms. I just wanted to get a toy from the toy chest. I'm sorry, I should have communicated that to you."
"It's alright just... I don't think blindfolds and noise-canceling headphones are for me."
"That's OK, that's alright. Sometimes we're going to find stuff we don't like."
-
Levi:
Levi is an extremely obedient sub. In your many months of dating each other he never once received a punishment. You two set out rules together, with him not being allowed to touch himself without your permission and him being required to leave his room and go to RAD a certain number of times each month.
You had expected a rule to be broken at least once, so you were very surprised to see that it never was. Levi was just obedient, and even when he didn't want to do the thing you ordered him to do, he did it. (Even with an excessive bit of whining)
So you were content to never punish your scaly demon.
Levi wasn't.
"Why do you never punish me," Levi asks, pouting in his bathtub. His face is partially hidden by the pillow he's clenching to his chest.
"Because you never actually break a rule or be a brat?"
"Hmmmmm," Levi pouts. "It's not fair! You punish the others! Yet you never punish me. Is it because you don't want to? Because you could never bring yourself to punish a gross otaku like me?"
Holding back a laugh you crawl into the bathtub. Really, only your Levi could be envious of those you've punished.
"Well, if you're so interested in being punished, why don't you do something bad?"
Levi's eyes snap towards yours, like he never actually considered that option. "Gahhhh?!? Be, be bad? How could I, wouldn't you hate me forever?!"
Softening you reach across the tub to cup Levi's face in your hands. Moving his shocked face towards yours you pepper his face in kisses.
"Nope! Levi, I could never hate you." You say softly, stopping your kissing momentarily to gaze sincerely at your boyfriend.
Levi blushes at the look and hides his face in the pillow that's currently squished between you two.
"O-ok, if you say you wouldn't hate me, I'll, I'll try being bad!"
-
You walk towards Levi's room with a pep in your step, excited to continue playing the new RPG the demon recently brought. You only stopped playing last night as your eyes burned too much for you to continue looking at the screen.
As you cheerfully open the door to Levi's room you immediately notice that something is off about the demon. Instead of excitedly smiling at you and handing a controller over to you, he's curled up on his gaming chair and nervously fidgeting with the blanket wrapped around his shoulders.
"What's wrong?" You ask. Standing over your boyfriend you check him over. Did Mammon steal something of his again? Was an anime he liked canceled?
Levi shakes off your concern and reaches for a controller. "N-nothing is wrong! We don't we start playing?"
He shoves the controller into your hand before scurrying off to turn on the game console. Unsure of what else to do to help your nervous demon you follow along, thinking that he'll open up once you start playing.
As the title screen of the game pops up you see Levi nervously staring at you in the corner of your eye, and you debate asking again if he's alright. Before you're able the title sequence stops and you press the "play" button. A column of saves pops up, and in your confusion, you momentarily forget about Levi's nervousness completely.
"Levi, where's my save?" You ask, flicking between the different saves, yours mysteriously gone.
"Oh well. Um. I sorta maybe, deleted it?" He says in a whisper so quiet you have to strain to hear it.
Snapping your head towards him you watch as Levi nervously fidgets. His left arm is covering his face in a classic sign of Levi's nervousness as a blush paints his cheeks.
Wait. Blush?
All of a sudden your previous conversation about punishment from yesterday comes back to you. You honestly didn't believe that Levi would gather up the courage to do something "bad", so you're momentarily impressed that he did.
All previous concerns about your save fly out the window, as you're sure that Levi backed up the save and is only pretending to have deleted it to elicit this punishment. Stalking forward you wrap your arms around your demon's shoulders and force him to face you.
"Oh, did you know? I didn't know my little demon could be so.... naughty~" You tease.
Levi's face darkens, at both your close proximity and your words. His mouth opens to defend himself but no words make it out. You watch as Levi reboots himself as you teasingly rub circles onto his shoulders.
As moments pass by and Levi is nowhere closer to calming down, you decide to pick up the lead again. "Does my demon want to be punished? Is that it? Were you sitting here in your room wondering what you could do to make me mad and pull you over my knee?"
Wordlessly Levi nods and confirmation, and you can't help but laugh a little. Even when being punished your demon can't help but be good for you.
Returning to your chair once again, you pat your chair and pat your thighs expectingly. Rushing to comply Levi lays across your thighs, and you give him a warning smack of what's to come.
"Ah!" Levi cries out, more in surprise than any real pain, as it will take a lot more than a little smack to hurt a demon Iike him.
It's not the first time you had Levi over your knee, though the previous times were more to explore a curiosity than for a punishment. Yet the previous experiences fill you with confidence, as you know where to smack to tease him, and where to smack that will cause him real pain.
As Levi gets himself situated on your lap you pull down his pants in one quick motion, jeans and all. The demon shivers as cold air meets his rear and you laugh at the pout he gives you in response.
Testing out the waters you give the bare ass a firm smack, and delight in the way Levi flinches at being caught off guard.
"Ah hmmm!" Levi moans, thrusting back for more.
"I expect you to count and thank me after each hit Levi-chan." You say sternly.
"O-one! Thank you, Master!"
Grinning you continue, giving your demon a few more smacks. You didn't give him a number on purpose, as you want to see how many smacks it'll take before his ass is a bright red and he's sobbing out for mercy.
As his ass gets redder and redder Levi begins to squirm against you, thrusting his hips against your thighs. You sigh in response, deep and disappointed, and the sound snaps Levi out of his pleasure filled hazy.
"No grinding against me. This is a punishment, remember? You're not supposed to be enjoying this."
Your tone is harsh, and it sends Levi flinching. You never sounded so.... frustrated in a scene before. Levi is used to you being teasing and gentle, always there with a soft word and a teasing touch. The idea of you being upset with him sends him spiraling.
Tensing up Levi tries his hardest to sit still and obey you, believing that maybe if he shows you that he can be good, and is willing to listen to your commands, you'll praise him. (You'll still want him.)
The next few swings of your fast, delivered before Levi has the chance to count them individually. Because of this, he miscounts them.
"Fifteen, s-sixteen, seventeen! Th-thank you, master."
Slowly, as Levi catches his breath your hand trails upward before suddenly wrapping tightly around his hair. Pulling him upward you lean down to whisper in your best Disappointed Dom voice: "Are you sure you counted right?"
Levi feels his heart stop at your words. He did, right?! He wouldn't miscount - didn't mean to miscount! He swears! It was an accident-
Slowly you watch as Levi's breath starts to stutter, stopping completely before gasping in and out. Immediately you drop your hold and Levi begins to hyperventilate against you.
"Sorry, I'm s-sorry. Didn't -gasp- didn't mean to! Sorry!"
Instantly you pick the demon up and hold his back towards his chest, hopeful that the extra room will allow him to calm down, as you begin mumbling praise into his ear.
"Hey, hey, it's ok! I'm not angry, I promise! There's no need to be sorry, it's ok, I forgive you."
Eventually, Levi gets his breathing under control, and he collapses against you once he does. Shifting him slightly, you pull him into your chest and he immediately buries his face into your neck. You continue to whisper praise as you being to gently stroke his back, allowing Levi the time to compose himself.
"I'm sorry." Is the first thing he says when he does.
"I know baby, I know. There's nothing to apologize for, though, you know that right? When I was disappointed that was only a part of the scene, right? Like when you sometimes pretend to not like something when you do."
Mutely you feel Leve nod against you.
"I, I didn't actually delete your save. I have it backed up on my computer."
"I know, sweetheart, I know." You whisper before leaning down to kiss the top of his head.
"How about this, we continue sitting here for a bit longer, and then we both get something to eat and drink. Then we have a little chat about the scene before loading up my save?"
Levi grumbles at the idea of actually having to talk about what happened, but he nods against you once.
"Good boy. That's my good boy."
-
Satan:
You hold up a pair of handcuffs and Satan grins.
You two haven't played around with the idea of bondage much, there were other kinks that you wanted to try out first. Sure, you toyed around with pinning his hands down to the bed or ordering him to sit still while you edged him. But you two have yet to use any tool to bind him.
A distinct click echoes throughout the room as you fasten the cuff to his right hand before moving to his left. His hands are looped around the bedframe, stopping him from reaching down to touch himself or you as you play with him.
A wise choice seeing as you plan to edge him until he's sobbing.
The first edge passes through him well, only resulting in a choked-off groan before you give him a few moments to calm down. As you do Satan begins to pull at the handcuffs, testing out their strength.
As he pulls his hands back and forth he feels his heartbeat pick up for a different reason. A looming sense of dread slowly starts to creep in, but before he can focus on it you begin to stroke his dick once again.
Arousal floods through his system once again, but so does anxiety. As he chases his denied relief once more he pulls against the handcuffs, flinching when they make a loud clicking noise as they scrape against the headboard.
When you shift away to allow him to cool off the anxiety settles in replacing all thoughts of arousal. He begins to fight earnestly against the handcuffs, pushing and pulling them, trying to will them to break. But they're strong cuffs, made out of demon-resistant metal and almost impossible to break.
In your mind all you can see is Satan shaking against the bed, sneaking out the pleasure you've denied him. But in Satan's, he's reliving an experience he hasn't felt in thousands of years: entrapment.
Memories of heavy chains wrapping around his body, caging him in and denying his escape as he withers and shakes in rage. Memories of dark closets and being chained to this very same bed as he screamed out curses and profanities until his throat bleed.
He thought he was past this stage of his life, where he was angry and trapped. Caged like a wild animal.
"S-SHAKESPEARE!" Satan growls out your safeword - a safeword that has never been used before.
It takes you a second to realize what he said, but once you do you're on him in an instant. Reaching up you fumble with the keys to the handcuffs as Satan struggles beneath you. You whisper praise and assurances as you unlock the cuffs, but you doubt he can hear you.
The moment he's free Satan flinches backward, his back hitting the wall as he scrambles to get away from you. His eyes are wide, his pupils are pinpricks as he studies the world around him. Akin to a wild, caged animal he crotches down like he's preparing to lunge, his chest rising and falling rapidly.
You know he wouldn't attack you, yet you do your best to look passive as you raise your hands in surrender.
It takes a few moments, but eventually, Satan comes back to himself. He seems to realize where he is, and what's going on, as he composes himself.
"Baby, are you ok?" You ask in a low, gentle tone.
And Satan breaks.
He completely shatters as he rushes into your arms. You barely have time to realize what's going on before you feel your chest wetten as Satan begins to sob.
"Oh, sweetheart, I'm so sorry." You mumble, hands lightly touching Satan's head. When he leans into the touch you begin gently petting him.
"It's, sniff, it's ok. You didn't know I would react like that. I didn't even know I would react like that."
"Still, I saw you struggling against the handcuffs, I should have checked up on you."
Satan doesn't know what to say to that, too tired to try to argue with you so he simply hums in response. After a few minutes of sitting in comfortable silence, your hands threading through his hair, he leans up and rubs the remainder of the tears out of his eyes.
"Do you want to talk about it? Or would you rather we do something else?" You ask, rubbing circles into his back.
"Can we read a bit first?" Satan asks, and on a normal day he would cringe at how timid he sounds, but he's too tired to care right now.
One day he'll tell you about his "childhood". About this memories of chains and ropes, of dark rooms and confined spaces, of rage and curses.
But now he just wants you to hold him as the two of you pour over a good murder mystery, him free to move around and shift, and you with your hands wrapped around his waist.
-
Asmo:
You and Asmo tried nearly every kink known to man, and even some only known to demons. So you know when Asmo's limits lie, and he knows yours. You know when he's fake whining to get a rise out of you, and when his cries border on actually "too much", you can tell the difference between pleasure tears and pain tears, and after many many conversations you know what kinks he absolutely wouldn't want to try under any circumstances.
Fortunately, polygamy wasn't one of them.
It wasn't often the two of you invited another into your bed, you could entertain each other just fine. But sometimes you wanted to see Asmo dom another person, or Asmo wanted to show off his skills next to a less experienced sub, and gangbangs were just fun! You only had two hands, and sometimes you wanted to see Asmo be taken apart by a dozen.
The orgy the two of you are going to tonight didn't have a "main character", but it was hosted by a prominent sex toy brand owner, and Asmo said that the snack bar was "to die for". So you decided to give it a try.
Asmo was being a brat the whole car ride over, pawing at your jacket and trying to kiss you. Trying to save the poor Uber driver you tell your demon to behave, but Asmo only giggles in response as he tries, and fails, to undo your buttons.
You hope that once you got to the orgy Asmo would settle down, but he's committed to being a brat. As you hand over your coat to the door demon, Asmo rushes ahead of you and sits down onto the lap of a demon he knows, who is very clearly in the middle of having their dick sucked by another attendee.
He tries to persuade them to let him take over and replace their sub's spot, but you're able to pull Asmo away by his collar and onto your lap.
For one glorious moment, you believe that this calms your demon down enough to start behaving, as he quiets down once as he gets settled. It wasn't long after that another demon started up a conversation with you, asking if you were the legendary exchange student, and how you felt about RAD.
While you talked Asmo absentmindedly sucks on your fingers. He tries squirming against your lap, but one smack to his thigh was a clear message for him to calm down.
Or so you thought.
When Asmo continues to grind against you and begins adding teeth to his sucking, you snap. If he was so determined to be punished tonight, he would get punished.
Rising you stand before Asmo wearing your best Disappointed Dom look. He giggles at the look, clearly happy that he thinks he's getting what he wants. That is a public spanking.
You have different plans though, and you walk towards a corner of the room no one is standing near. Snapping your fingers at the corner you command your demon:
"Asmo, over here now."
Asmo rushes off the couch to obey as he skips over. He eyes you a curious look as you force him to his knees, obviously not expecting his punishment to be somewhere so out of the way and private. You pay it no mind, and when he sinks to the floor and assumes a standard kneeling position you give him another command:
"You're not to move, and unless it's your safeword you're not allowed to speak either until I say your punishment is over."
He pouts as he feels the command take hold, staring up at you with pleading eyes. But you don't allow yourself to be swayed.
"Since you were so determined to be a brat and not be patient, this is your punishment. When I think you're finally to sit still I will release you."
You give him one last pat on the head before making your way back to the couch.
As you resume your conversation with the other demon about RAD, more demons start to join in. Some are curious about your life as an exchange student while others are more concerned with the reason why you're here.
A bold demon leaned in close and whispered something in your ear, causing you to blush and gently swat their arm. After that it was like the other demons suddenly remember that they were at an orgy and not a press conference, and began cuddling up to you.
All the while Asmo stews from his spot kneeling in the corner. At first, he was upset at you for hiding him, but now that you're getting more and more attention a prickle of envy runs through him. Not at you, but at the demons now vying for your attention. You should be focused on him - even if it was to punish him.
Normally Asmo wouldn't mind you getting cozy with a few other demons, under different circumstances he would have been delighted to sit back and watch as you had your way with a few of them. Now? When he's hidden away in a corner, forgotten?
Something stings in Asmo, and he desperately tries to whine out for your attention, but the command stops him. All that leaves him is the wheeze of his chest as he desperately tries to force words out of his mouth. Your safeword was on the tip of his tongue, and if you two were alone he wouldn't hesitate to say it, but something about being in a room full of demons stop him.
He's the Avatar the lust, and this is barely a punishment, what would the other demons say if they saw him use his safeword just because he was put into a corner? He knows that safewording isn't a sign of weakness, but he can't shake the thought of what rumors might follow him if he shows vulnerability.
But when he sees a demon crawl into your lap, and you kiss them on the lips, he can't help but yell out a desperate "Majolish"!
Immediately you push the demon out of your lap and rush toward Asmo. Your knees hit the ground with a loud thud but you pay it no mind you kneel before the now sobbing demon.
"All commands are over! Asmo are you ok, what happened?!"
Asmo doesn't waste a second as his arms shot around you and pull you close. As he sobs into your chest your hands slowly wrap around your demon, trying to piece together what went wrong. You don't get must time to think before Asmo's lips are on yours, kissing you desperately, which you quickly return with enthusiasm. Asmo calms down once you make it clear that you desire him, slumping into your chest.
When you break for air you timidly look around the room and breathe a sigh of relief as you notice that the surrounding demons are making an effort not you look in your direction. As you make eye contact with a demon they mouth out a "side room" while pointing at a closed door.
Understanding that this must be some type of aftercare room, or simply a private room couples can retreat into, you quickly pull Asmo up and lead him into the room. As you make it through the doorway you relax as you see that no one else is in there and gently push Amso onto the bed.
"Asmo, sweetheart, darling, we don't have to talk about what happened right away, but I do want to make you feel better. Can you please tell me if there's anything I can do?"
Asmo, whose been holding your hand in a death grip slowly nods as his other hand wipes at his tears.
"Yeah, yes of course. Just can you, can you hold me for a bit?" His voice gets quieter at the end. "Maybe tell me you love me?"
It's rare to see Asmo so shaken up, even after using his safeword, and something breaks inside of you. But you're determined to focus on him, and you nod.
"Of course baby, scout over."
Asmo does as he's told and you're quick to pull him into a tight hug before you begin to slowly rock him back and forth. All the while whispering praise into his ear about how much you adore him, and how beautiful he is.
-
Beel:
It seemed so simple when you suggested the idea: why not mix two of Beel's biggest pleasures and bring food into the bedroom?
You haven't had much experience with food play before, but after doing some research (watching porn on DevilHub and writing down things you found hot), you were confident you could make food sexy.
After discussing what will happen in the scene, you and Beel come up with a game plan. Beel was a bit worried about not being able to focus on sex when he was eating, so you proposed a solution: you will command Beel to sit still and tease him with food from Madam Screams. When he's a good boy and shows patience, you'll reward him by feeding him a piece of food and then stroking his dick. Trapping in a cycle of wanting pleasure, and being hungry.
The start of the scene went according to plan, with Beel able to control himself as he sinks to his knees in front of you. You dangle a curly fry in front of his face, and Beel drools at the sight.
Teasing him you press the fry against his lips and tell him by a good boy and hold it there. Like a dog, Beel obeys and holds the treat against his lips and makes no move to bite. While your other hand sinks to the edge of his boxers.
Palming his dick Beel lets out a guttural groan, the motion causing the fry to ever so slightly push past his lips and he gets a slight taste of the slaty goodness before you rip it away. The glutton barely has time to mourn that loss before he sinks into pleasure once more as you pull his dick out of his underwear.
Already hard and dripping Beel's dick bounces against his stomach, and you coo in delight.
"Oh baby, you're already so wet for me. Excited already?"
Beel moans in response, unable to think clearly as it was growing harder to think through the pleasure filled haze of his mind.
Wrapping your hand around your dick you give it a firm tug, just how he likes it. All thoughts of food and hunger spill out of his mind as you begin playing with his dick.
Until you press the curly fry against his nose and he breathes in the scent. Hunger overtakes him once more as he tries to lunge for it, but you move it away before he's able. Pressing a firm finger against his slit Beel groans as he's stuck in a tug of war between his two different desires. Food, and sex.
As you deny him his treat once again a growl rumbles through his chest and you pause. Beel has never growled like that during sex before. Smiling you continue to jack him off, but Beel is less excited about his rough growl. He normally tries so hard to keep his hunger rage away from you, what if he loses control?
You don't give him much time to worry about concern as you pump him toward an orgasm. Yet the moment Beel feels like he's going to tip over, your hands retreat and he's left wanting.
As a reward you pop the fry into the demon's panting mouth and he instantly inhales it. But it doesn't provide him much relief as he just feels hungrier.
Beel is used to fighting off his hunger and he's used to you edging him. But dealing with both at once? It's an overwhelming, all encompassing desire he never felt before.
And he's not sure if he likes it.
As you lean down to touch his dick once again Beel lets out a throaty whine, sounding more desperate than you ever heard him before. Horny, but worried you glance up at your gentle giant.
"Are you doing alright, buddy?"
"Hungry- no, horny. I can't, I don't know. I want to stop." He rushes out the last part quickly, but you hear it all the same.
"Oh! OK, alright. Yeah, we can stop no problem. Um, which one do you want first? Do you want me to get you off first or do you want to eat first?"
Beel moans hopelessly at the question, and you mentally berate yourself for even asking. It's not like he can't do both at once.
Shoving a handful of fries into his mouth you begin pumping his dick in earnest now, determined to actually get him off this time. Every time Beel moans in hunger you're quick to feed him more food, and Beel is treated to the sensation of eating while getting pleasure.
It doesn't take long for him to cum, shooting into your hands and getting a bit of your chin as he does. As he breathes out a sigh of relief he lays boneless against you, and you remember to finally undo the sit still command you previously placed on him.
Patting his back with one hand the other reaches over to grab a nearby drink and you hand it to him to help wash down the food. After he downs it one gulp he leans back to give you a dopey, but incredibly fond look.
"That was nice. I liked it when you feed me while jacking me off."
Grinning at the honesty, you lean in and kiss your demon.
"Thank you. I liked how desperate you were and how to relied on me to give you everything you wanted. What about the teasing?"
"I.... didn't like that. I was afraid I'll get too needy and hurt you." Beel says the last part ashamed and you're quick to lean up to give him another kiss.
"I get that, it seemed like a lot. If you want to do this again I would tease you again, I promise."
Beel grins, and you momentarily mourn your wallet at how much food you'll be buying in the future. But that fond look is enough to banish all mournful thoughts in an instant.
"I'll like that."
-
- Belphie:
Belphie being a brat isn't a new development for you. He's been a brat since the first time you bedded him. Which resulted in a lot of punishments. A lot.
You almost believe that Belphie prefers to be punished than his regular scenes, and that makes you want to up the ante and show him a real punishment is like. Maybe you'll finally convince him to be obedient for once.
So you got a new toy you wanted to try with him, a paddle. It's a thick, strong paddle. Made in the Devildom because you don't think a human realm one will survive Belphie's ass.
Yet the demon doesn't so much as cower when you present the toy to him after he caused you to sleep in and miss class again. Well, you'll show him. You'll have him pleading for mercy in no time.
The Avatar of Sloth, true to his name, doesn't put up any type of a fight as you pull him across your lap. Only grinning when you pull his pants down and you notice that he's not wearing any underwear.
"You were really committed to being a brat today, weren't you?" You tease, giving the demon a quick pop on the ass with the paddle.
Belphie moans at the sensation, and giggles a cheeky "no". Wasting no time with foreplay you get right into business by delivering a fury of blows to the demon's plush. You don't bother to tell him to count them, knowing that he wouldn't, or that he'll miscount on purpose.
Moaning at the feeling Belphie arches his back as he leans into the swatting, enjoying the pushing sensation.
Yet, as time continues and you keep hitting and his ass gets redder and redder Belphie starts to feel weird..... tender. You normally don't cause him to feel this raw until much later in his punishment. When both of your hands sting with the amount of blows you dealt, the two of you are out of breath and ready to tear each other's clothes off.
As you strike down the paddle once again, Belphie feels something he hasn't felt in a very long time:
Pain
Sure, your spankings hurt before. But it was more of a force, a push, a physical reaction to movement than any real kind of pain.
And Belphie is not prepared to handle real pain. As the spoiled youngest of the Avatars, he's used to not having to lift a finger. This made your punishments even more exciting as Belphie felt the closest he did to pain he felt in a long time, without actually crossing over into actual pain.
He may not be as physically resistant as Beel or Lucifer, but he's still an Avatar, a high class demon who can take a lot before anything even fazes him.
Which makes this situation laughable.
A simple human like you, causing him, a ruler of the Devildom, pain? It's impossible, it should be impossible.
Yet here he is, forcing back tears as a flimsy wooden paddle causes him pain he hasn't felt since the Celestial War. He wants to laugh, but he wants to cry even more.
The safeword is on the tip of his tongue, but he refuses to cave. He's been spanked dozens of times before, why should he admit defeat over a stupid paddle? He knows you'll disagree with him framing it like that, but you're too busy creating welts on his ass to argue with Belphie's mind.
When you show no signs of stopping or slowing down, Belphie starts to crack. For once he just wants a punishment to be over and for him to apologize and for you to hold him in your arms.
When you strike down once more, Belphie cries out a "No!" That's a little too desperate, a little too panicked, that snaps you out of your rhythm
"Baby?" You ask, placing the paddle next to you. "Are you ok? Do you need a breather?" You know not to suggest stopping, as Belphie will scoff at the notion before edging you on, but something about the way he's flinching makes you want to pause the scene for a moment.
"No," Belphie sniffs, hand reaching upward to rub the tears out of his. "No I'm fine, keep going." He insits, but you notice the way he leans away from you as he says it. Belphie may be a brat, he may pretend to huff and hate punishments, but he never shifted away from you during a scene pause.
Placing down the paddle beside you, you host Belphie up and press him against your chest. The moment you do he's hiding his face in your shirt, an act of shyness that's out of character for the demon.
"Belphie, baby, are you ok? We can stop if you want to."
Belphie sniffles against your shift and you raise your hands to rub comforting circles into his skin.
"I'm fine, just.... I'm not letting a stupid paddle break me." He mumbles out the last part, but you're able to catch the gist of it and you frown.
"You know that's now how that works. You're not admitting defeat, or saying you're not strong enough if you use your safeword."
Believe grumbles out a response you don't catch, but you doubt he's agreeing with you. Shifting his head upwards you create eye contact between the two of you, and don't relent until he's staring into your eyes.
"What if I didn't want to do something and so I used our safeword? Am I breaking then?"
Belphie pouts, knowing that he'll never think any less of you if you were to use the safeword. So reluctantly he shakes his head.
"Well, why's it any different for you? Because you're a demon?"
He flashes pink at being so easily read, and he keeps his mouth shut as he shrinks down.
"No, but......" Belphie trails off, unsure of what to say. Smiling softly you lean forward to press a kiss into his lips, one he's quick to mirror.
"Alrighty, so no more holding in your safeword, ok?"
With an exaggerated sigh, Belphie nods before cuddling up to you. As you lay down with your arms wrapped around him, careful to shift him so his tender ass isn't touching anything, you begin stroking his hair. In the following silence, all that can be heard is the steady rise and fall of both of your chests before Belphie says determined:
"I'm going to burn that paddle though."
-
#obey me#obey me smut#obeymesmut#obey me dom!reader#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me levi#obey me asmo#obey me satan#obey me Beel#obey me belphie#my post#i swear this post was SUPPOSED to be short and sweet.#a little break while i work on my OTHER incredibly long fic#but then i kept thinking about Satan getting flashbacks to when he was tied up in NB and i had to write it#why i didnt just post my original short thoughts and then add Satan's part in a reblog#idk.#and since i written a mini fic for satan OBVIOUSLY i had to do it for the rest of the brothers!!#ok but ive been working on this for a few days. when i had a bit of freetime ill write a brothers part#the actual order i wrote these in was Satan. Asmo. Lucifer. Mammons and Levis got mixed up because i went inbetween them whenever i got#tired of working on their part#then Beel and then Belphie#idk if that like. shows lol#anyways. um. thank you for the ask!!!#i obviously thought about it really hard lol#i actually planned on having Beel safeword too and have him call Red#because in my mind you explained te concept of safewords to Beel and started off with red yellow green#and Beel just never bothered to create a new one#i actually didnt think ill do well at writing food play because im not personally into it but like. i kinda like it?#some of these didnt follow the prompty exactly bc i got tireddddd lol
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Why the Player doesn't and SHOULDN'T exist in Undertale Yellow.
Figured that I should explain my take seeing as everyone who saw the meme (ON REDDIT) about it didn't like it. I'll be sharing my personal views about the 'Player', evidence for our existence within the game and why I don't buy it.
1. Neutral Flowey Dialogue: This is the only piece of evidence I've seen for 'Player's' existence in Undertale Yellow. If you battle Flowey 4+ times and have a FUN Value of 70+, he will talk about him and Clover being alone in his mind and a strange feeling he's been having since Clover showed up.
Focus on that last part. "Since Clover showed up." Clover first fell into the Underground hundreds of runs ago, runs that we don't get to play. If Flowey was talking about us, he would've said that he's been having this feeling since Clover fell into the Dark Ruins for the first time.
It's just as likely that the sight of another human dug up some remnants of Asriel from within Flowey but I don't have any evidence for that either. I honestly think this whole thing was just an Easter Egg of some kind. This alone isn't enough to prove to me that the Player is possessing Clover. Speaking of Clover.
2. Clover's Character: Unlike most of the human characters in this fandom, Clover has a clear personality throughout the game. He's kind, hates injustice, has a sense of humour, is honourable enough to spare Martlet TWICE in the Vengeance Route and is always ready to fight for what is right.
Any choices that the game gives us are all things Clover would reasonably do by himself. Half of the time we are given only one option.
3. The Narrative: Think back to the end of the True Pacifist Run. Clover spares Ceroba despite her pleas, then sacrifices himself for Monsterkind. Such a momentous moment that caused many of us to tear up.
Here's where the issue comes in. If the 'Player' exists, then Clover isn't some selfless hero who was able to befriend all these characters, peacefully resolve every conflict, and choose the needs of the many before himself. Some faceless entity using Clover as a meat suit did.
Same with Genocide. It's no longer a story of twisted Justice and the morality of Undertale. It's just us playing for another ending.
The same issues show up in the main game. The Player being canon strips our protagonists of any character, individuality and responsibility, the good and the bad.
At least in Deltarune, Kris' struggle for control is actually part of the story.
5. Player's Potential: The concept of the Player is interesting, don't get me wrong. But this fandom refuses to use it to its full potential. We've turned ourselves into another Chara. Some demonic entity with no real motivation forces our human characters to do bad things and bad things only.
Wouldn't be interesting if the Player was more like the Collector from The Owl House, or if the Player's relationship with the human characters.
In case you forgot, we didn't make Kris our vessel. We were forced to possess them after our perfectly good, empty vessel was thrown out.
#undertale#undertale yellow clover#undertale yellow#clover#undertale clover#uty clover#clover uty#clover undertale yellow#undertale player#deltarune player
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Demons of your choice: you (owner) accidentally schedule an important vet appointment that can't be rescheduled for months, so (against your better judgement) you take your pet(s) while their experiencing a heat.
Zenitsu
Though he doesn't have much of a sense of shame to begin with, the prospect of being brought out in public like this has Zenitsu begging you to reconsider. He'll stick as close to you as possible, flinching at every sudden noise, and silently hoping that no one other than you will have to touch him too much. Any handling by the vet gets overwhelming very quickly— by the time the appointment is done, he's a teary, sniffling mess, too far gone to think about anything but clinging to you for any way to hide.
Sanemi
Vet appointments are difficult, at the best of times. With the heat-induced combination of physical discomfort and emotional volatility involved, Sanemi is somehow even less tolerant of the whole situation than usual— and that means he's bound to lash out from sheer stress. By the time restraints are involved, he's panicking, and even more distressed by how little he can do to struggle when his body is so weak. It's slightly better if you're allowed to stay close to him, but that's not saying much.
Tanjirou
Though he's absolutely dreading it, rationally, he understands that there's nothing you can do to change the appointment date. Tanjrou promises he'll be okay and that he'll do his best to behave... and refuses to let himself beg for some way out of this. In the end, it takes every bit of self-control he has not to go limp on the exam room floor and lean into even the vet's touches, and the appointment feels like it drags on for hours. He's shaky, dazed, and visibly overwhelmed by the time it's all over.
Gyuutarou
He hates being inspected by other humans anyway (you're barely tolerable, by now), so having to go through the stress of a vet appointment while oversensitive and half-delirious from the heat feels like actual torture. Gyuutarou does his best to stay quiet and still in the hopes it'll be over faster, but the panic gets the better of him eventually— not that trying to struggle away and hide does much good. The whole experience is miserable and humiliating, and the fear of punishment for lashing out only makes it worse.
#Kimetsu no Yaiba#KnY#Zenitsu#Agatsuma Zenitsu#Sanemi#Shinazugawa Sanemi#Tanjirou#Kamado Tanjirou#Gyuutarou#Headcanon#Reader#KnY Pet Au#Lemon
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What are the Lls love languages?
LOVE INTEREST'S LOVE LANGUAGES
The Demon
Giving: Acts of Service
D loves doing things for other people, even if he has a scowl or complains half the time, he'll do it. If he silently sees you struggling he'll help, if he sees you overwhelmed he's taking on some of the burden. He loves doing things especially for you/MC since you have his utmost loyalty, which he takes very seriously.
Receiving: Words of Affirmation
D rarely has moments of receiving kind words and even less so before Eclipse. So someone saying kind words and meaning it really affects him, but only if it's from someone he cares about. Specifically you/MC, your words whether subconsciously or not affect him.
The Angel
Giving: Physical Touch
L-18 is a very very very social and touchy feely type person. Loves giving hugs, high-fives, head pats, anything physical that shows she's present and there for you.
Receiving: Physical Touch
She also has an issue with object permanence, so if it's outta sight she tends to sometimes forget that it exists. It's not as bad with people since she's practiced with remembering and controlling it, but physical touch helps her remember that she isn't alone. Especially since Harpies arent lonely creatures and are often in groups, so it also helps with loneliness.
The Dragon
Giving: Quality Time
R-12 spends a lot of time sleeping, but can also sense when others are around, so he enjoys the feel of your/MC's presence even if she's sleeping or not actively engaging. There's something oddly romantic about it.
Receiving: Acts of Service
Because R-12 is used to doing a lot for others, it's rare for someone to do something for him, so it always warms her heart whenever you/MC does anything for them. Another act which they view extremely intimate.
The Armadillo
Giving: Gift Giving
X-6 enjoys building and creating things and he likes giving people things for their reaction. He will act like it's the worst thing on earth if you possibly like it, but expect to receive 15 more things just like it. He sometimes hyperfixations on his interests and has a slight hoarding problem, so him giving it away helps.
Receiving: Words of Affirmations
Any kind words you could possibly say, he hates on the outside, gagging if you're ever nice to him, but he does take it to heart. He will try not to show how much it meant to him that you said something so nice, but he hasn't received kind words in almost centuries so it's nice to hear.
The Warden
Giving: Acts of Service
As long as it doesn't get in the way of his time, he'll silently take over your duties, possibly scolding you if you're unable to do it yourself. He isn't the type to get flustered not embarrassed and if you ask him why he's doing one of your tasks, he'll simply say cause he wanted too. Which will come off extremely mean sounding and bland.
Receiving: Acts of Service
If you respect him in any fashion, you'll do what he asks. He enjoys when others follow the rules and when they do so with instruction, already knowing routine.
#t.m.basement.convos#t.m.basement.demon#t.m.basement.armadillo#t.m.basement.dragon#t.m.basement.angel#t.m.basement.warden#interactive fic#interactive fiction twine#itchio interactive fic#interactive fiction#twine interactive fiction#dating sim#horror interactive fic#interactive fiction demos#dating sim characters#if game#the six that thrive#t.m.basement.stories
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[Age Swap Mafia, Mob Headcanon]
Shigeo Kageyama | Mob Psycho 100
Age Swap Mafia AU
21-06-2023
#mp100 Age Swap Madia AU ideas (or at least, the way I spin it): Shigeo Kageyama edition:
-Mob still has psychic powers but he isn't as scared to use them on people and therefore controls them better. They still tend to go out of control when he's feeling strong emotions.
-He's not much in contact with his family anymore, more to keep them out of the criminal world than anything. He sees his parents at some events but that's about it. He sees ritsu more, mostly because Ritsu was already tied to this world at some point.
-Mob became a member of the mafia half because he ended up in the wrong crowd of people and because their family was struggling with money. He wanted to help his parents and help Ristu continue his studies to become a doctor. He never told his parents about being part of the yakuza nor how he's now the boss of one of the biggest families in their area, but his parents obviously can read the news.
They never mention it and decide to look the other way.
-Ekubo and Mamoru are the members that have known Mob for the longest. Most people are either newer members, or if they followed Mob they weren't as old in the gang as the three were. Anyone that would have known Mob for as long as the twin has either retired or died.
-(inspired by Eiden's thread) Mob became the boss he is today after overthrowing the previous boss and his lieutenant. Things had been declining for a long while and everyone at the top kept abusing and mistreating everyone else.
Mob decided to do something about it and immediately had the backing of the twins. It wasn't hard finding other strong allies around him to ensure even better his success. Once he became the boss (and the family became the Kageyama), he started weeding out the bad apples.
-Mob is a rather closed-off person and doesn't open up easily, nor is his absolute trust easy to win. For a long while the Yoshioka twins were the only one he truly trusted with his back, especially with his new position. He now has more trust in the higher-ranking man.
-Mob hates having to do social things with leader of other families to keep good relationship. He does it only because he knows that despite how confident he is in himself, he still need good allies. The only one he trust is Sho Suzuki (the only other family backing him when he overthrew the other group. Despite that, he still doesn't see reasons for the man to plot against him.)
-Very few people have seen what his tattoo looks like, he's rather modest and doesn't like undressing in front of people.
-Reigen is the first person he has fallen for in years, and is more possessive and protective of him than he would have likely been in his teenage years.
-He was nicknamed the "Silent Demon" after an assassination job he did where he killed many people without anyone ever hearing anything despite there being many people around. Mob can be really quiet when he wishes to be and uses his powers to render people quieter.
(ngl that last one might get revised lol, am trying to find titles they've earned)
Original
#tweet archive#mp100#mob psycho 100#shigeo kageyama#age swap au#age swap mafia au#mafia au#character headcanon
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Aunty, I like hearing from you because I like you, alright? Anyways, I never watched Danny phantom growing up. My parents thought it was demonic... but yeah. I'm happy it brings you joy. What is the series even about? Sincerely, a wolf.
The series focuses on Danny Fenton a boy who has Ghost hunting mad scientist for parents. His parents built a portal into the 'ghost dimension' (also known as the infinite realms) but the portal doesn't work.
Danny's friends Sam (goth girl social activist and ultra recycled vegetarian) and Tucker (tech nerd who is a carnivor) want to explore the parent's lab (which is in the basement of Danny's home) and while doing so see the portal. Sam convinces Danny to go into the inactive portal and pose for a picture.
While in the portal he trips on some wires and hits the internal on button and the portal activates with him inside. Which essentially kills Danny. But due to the flood of ectoplasm rather then staying dead he comes back. He is now half Ghost, something they call a halfa (dumb name I know) and with it comes a bunch of powers and a ghost form he can take at anytime. It's Danny but inverted colors.
Now that the portal is working a bunch of Ghost start slipping out of it into the mortal plane and after they attack his friends Danny takes it upon himself to become a ghost hunting vigilante with a catch and release into the ghost zone policy.
The show focuses on Danny and his friends lives as Danny learns to control his powers, juggle his school life, family life, and trying to keep his vigilante self secret. Which is a struggle because his parents are unknowingly hunting him in his other form. While most of their inventions don't work on occasionally they make something that does; those things *can* hurt him. But he can usually manage safely with the help of his friends and later his older sister who stumbles on the secret.
The show is a lot of shenanigans and as the series continues gets more complex. Like when the government issues an anti-eco acts (all Ghost and ghost like being Aka liminals are classified as not human and to be hunted down and experimented on) and an introduction of the ghost investigation ward. Or as everyone calls them the guys in white. Because they wear full white suits and act like the men in black rip offs. Though MiB doesn't exist there.
He also has a cast of regularly returning villains, some of which slowly kinda become friends but still fight him and cause chaos.
Then there is Vlad Masters which is a *huge* plot point that I can expand on but the tldr is he was friends with Danny's parents in collage and a smaller but similar accident happened to him as Dany just not as serious. He's obsessed with Danny's mom (Maddie) and hates his Dad (Jack) and plans to steal Maddie from Jack. But he plans on using Fanny and Jaz to do is by winning them over. The fact he too is a halfa is revealed and he and Danny fight. Vlad becomes obsessed with the idea of becoming Danny's new father for a few reasons: they are the only two beings like them to exist, scorn Jack, and with Danny's help win his mother and sister over. When Danny refuses he starts trying to kill Jack and Danny struggles to fight him off and again keep his identity a secret.
Meanwhile Danny's parents have *no* clue about what Vlad is thinking, planning, and doing so they continue to treat him like a close family friend. Much to Danny's pain.
There is sooo much more but those are some of the major plot points which is impressive for such a short series.
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Fanfiction review : Unexpected
Disclaimer: Do not send hate to anyone mentioned in this post. If you plan to respond in anyway to this post, I ask that you remain civil to everyone. Also, this review is an opinion post. Do not take what I say here as fact. Thank you.
------------------
I like sorbet. I do! I prefer it to ice cream, and I would gladly eat half a tub without hesitation. But if I were to eat it every day? I'd get sick of it. It's always bothersome when something like that happens. Especially in literature. Sometimes, a short story is more enjoyable than a lengthy saga. Good things can come in small packages....
... what was I talking about again? Ah, whatever.
Anyway, let's talk about zoophobia fanfiction.
*****
Those who have had the misfortune of reading my last fic review may recall that I went through each and every chapter of TDL's story. This time, however, this will be structured in a sort of ramble. I will be discussing things in sections, and I will give my overall thoughts at the end. This is a review of "Unexpected " by a "Kalum16" , who, if my memory serves me correctly, goes by @kartoonluv on Tumblr. Now, this review was not requested by anyone, so if Kalum (who I'll refer to as KL for brevity's sake) wishes this review to be deleted, I will comply with his wishes. Also, I suggest that you read this on fanfiction.net before continuing with this post.
******
Something I would like to get out of the way are my views on romance and the story's pairing. I'd like to bring these up now as I will be mentioning them later on.
Firstly, I have never been in a romantic relationship. However, I have been in love before, and I know people who are or who have been in relationships. That being said, I have considered that perhaps my lack of experience will mean that with certain things... I might not get it. The importance of certain events may be lost on me, and I may not be able to connect with things couples do.
I would also like to confess that Kayla x Damian is one of my least favorite ZP ships. The idea that after Damian basically harasses Kayla, manipulates her and Zill, and basically makes their lives miserable for his own gain, that he can be rewarded by getting the girl? Not exactly something I jive with. Also, (and this is my interpretation) I do not think that Damian's feelings towards Kayla are genuine. By that, I think (due to how little they know about each other) Dame is more in love with his idea of who Kayla is. Or, if we weren't going to look to deep into it and say that it's because he has a thing for Christians, it would make Dame's attraction pretty materialistic. Neither idea really screams "good ship!" to me.
********
That being said, let's discuss how the pairing is handled here. I'm actually on board with this depiction of the relationship. For one thing, it seems that Kay and Dame have become friends. They clearly care about one another before starting a relationship, and the story makes it so that they can relate to each other. This takes away my issue of these characters not acting knowing each other well, and thus the feelings they have towards one another come off as genuine.
I think that the story makes them out to the a cute couple. However, I still have a major issue with it, and the story as a whole.
Basically, (after a while) I think it's boring.
To best explain why, I would first like detour and discuss Damian and Kayla individually.
*******
Ladies first. I have mentioned in previous posts that I enjoyed the first chapter of this story. Back then, I had not read beyond chapter 1, as I hadn't realized that the story had been updated. And you know what? I still stand by that. In chapter 1, Kayla feels a lot more interesting than she is in the comic. It's interesting to see Kay in a situation where she basically gets what she wants, but she ends up hating it. She struggles with writers block, self doubt and regret. It's sad to see how apathetic she's become, and how she no longer holds the ambition she once did.
I also liked that she still had some internalized prejudice against demons. It made sense, and it made what was going on more interesting as it created inner conflict. Now, if the story was just the one chapter, I would have bought that her falling in love with Dame would have made all her prejudice go away. I mean, you would need to wrap it up by the end.
But we got more than 1 chapter, and thus the evaporated prejudice feels kind of contrived and like lost potential. Hell, it would have been interesting if an ongoing subplot involved Kayla conquering her prejudice by learning about demons and debunking the stories that I heard as a kid. Her just yeeting away her prejudice because she falls for one guy feels kind of lame, and going forward, Kayla feels less interesting in the fic.
Originally, she had all this regret and self doubt. While it's great to see her doing good, her issues feel like they've almost all been resolved by a makeout session. Throughout the story, Kay doesn't grow or develop in any way. Her only real issue is "I'm in love with Dame and ppl don't like it, woe is me"
There's this chapter where Dame meets Kay's parents, and I feel like I should be invested, but I'm more confused than anything. The story points out that Kay's parents were ok with Zill (who's part demon, part whatever the fuck), but they're not ok with Dame. I mean, yes, he's the antichrist, but have they not figured out that their daughter is into some weird dudes? Like, they're perspective is painted as "oh, Kay was such a good girl, and yadda yadda", but, again, they were ok with Zill. You'd think that that relationship would at least make them question that idea? Also, why are Kay's parents deer? Am I missing something?
Kay serves really only one role here. She's Dame's gf, she'll defend the relationship to the grave, and she cares about him. She doesn't become much more than that, and every chapter feels like it's redundant in reinforcing that idea. Like...ok, we get it, let's move on.
*******
Does Damian do much here? Not really. He's mainly the inverse of Kayla for the most part, being "I will defend this love, no matter fucking what". The issue being constantly brought up about how he's the antichrist, so "oh no, that makes things difficult ", is always resolved in about a chapter.
The story feels like it's trying to give Damian some development. I mean, I guess he stands up for himself against Kay's parents, and defends her from his? Oh, and there's that moment where he's like "Yo, I have no control over my life, I don't wanna be a prince, you make me happy ", etc. But not even this really does anything. The meeting with his parents feels like a repeat of meeting Kay's parents. We even get the one parent approval, one on one talk, and it's the mom, just like before. Oh, and Dame's emotional "I will reject prince-y ness to be with you " speech? All that leads to is them having sex.
Ok, well, that last one I might give a pass. I don't find sex to be that big a deal, but I know some people view it as this super important thing, so maybe through that lense, I could see sex as being an emotional payoff.
*******
One thing I won't give a pass is chapter 2, which really didn't need to be here. Jack never shows up again, Kayla can be subtracted from this chapter entirely, and the only build up to this was a couple lines in the previous chapter. The chapter itself is alright, but it feels like it should have been it's own separate story. My only idea as to why this chapter should stay is that, apart from Kayla in chapter 1, this is the only chapter with development. Damian owning up for being a shit is great, and it shows some of only god damn growth for anyone here.
Another chapter that didn't need to be here was whichever was the chapter when Zill showed up again. Admittedly, I skipped this chapter almost entirely. Look, he and Kay broke up, and they're dating different people. That's it. That's all we need. I read the first few paragraphs and the last few. I feel like I don't need to read the entire chapter to know that it's just reinforcing the idea of how great a couple Kayla and Damian are. You know, like basically every chapter in here.
*****
My biggest issue overall with this story is the relationship. As much as I've been ragging on this fic, KL is very gifted at writing. There were some instances where a reread or two could fix some wonky sentences (sounds like me reviewing my posts), but overall he does have a good grasp on it.
That being said, the relationship, the core of this story, is not interesting enough to warrant all six chapters. The only issue Kayla and Damian face are the opinions of others. They never have any reason to question the relationship, question themselves as people, or think about how to handle things. It would have been a lot more interesting if we saw them develop the close relationship the story portrays them as having. It would be interesting if we saw them learn more about each other, or discover ways to deal with each other if one of them is being a dumb bitch. We get it. They love and care about each other. The world around them think it's weird. Every chapter just reinforces the same idea again and again.
I think KL could easily make this better. There's a bunch of plot points that are never brought up more than once that could be interesting. For instance, Kayla struggling to write new songs. We could see more of how she and Dame deal with that instead of having them mention "oh yeah, the problem is fixed now ". Does Damian ever earn Jack's forgiveness? Does Kayla learn anything new about demons?
KL, I believe you when you say these two care a lot about each other. And yeah, seeing how they make their relationship work in spite of what others think is an interesting idea on paper. But the characters don't become closer to each other or anything. Why would I be concerned about the issues presented in the story when I know that they're just going to be resolved in the same way?
You know it's kind of like sorbet...
I would still nonetheless recommend this story tho. Again, as much as I've ragged on it, I still think that the story is good. As mentioned before, I don't have much experience with romantic relationships, so perhaps something here could be lost on me. I'm curious to know anyone else's thoughts.
I apologize for wasting your time
- Spooky S Skeletons
Ps. Yes, quarantine is messing with my head :) just bear with me
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Episode 34
Lydia
6am meetings. I have always hated them and I have always believed that I am too junior to be sitting in them. People who get paid the real money are the people who are paid to sit in such meetings. I'm just a specialist. I have no business being here.
The meeting is virtual and the big guns are preparing for a meeting with my man. It amazes me how scared they are of him. Thomas is such a teddy bear. All he asks is for people to do what they get paid to do. When he wants answers, he wants them with immediate effect. He and I living together and being in this relationship gives him insight on what happens on the ground. Sometimes he just keeps quiet about it, but sometimes he gets annoyed. While he appreciates that his staff works hard and at basically any time of the day, I am also his girlfriend and we have a small baby who needs my attention. It doesn't sit well with him that I leave the bed so early and that I half attend to my daughter when breastfeeding her because I am busy attending meetings. He shits on me, but I'm in a tight position. If I become more of his partner than his employee, Palesa will performance manage me out of the company. That one and power equals a dangerous combination. If he starts shitting on people at work and behaving like a controlling boyfriend who demands what work I should and shouldn't do, he would be unprofessional then the complaints would compromise him.
Now, he is an absolute demon to work with and people are even more scared of him. Good work no longer impresses him, so the aim now is to not have a single mistake on a slide, not even a comma in the wrong place.
Palesa wraps up the meeting at 7:30am and my mom has already arrived to look after Rofhiwa. She has clearly appointed herself as the nanny. We chat a bit about me being back at work and her resigning from her job. Thomas inserts his five cents comments about me working too much and not being present enough for Rofhiwa. Sometimes, I feel as if he implies that I am a bad mother and I don’t appreciate it. I will address it when the time is right though, maybe on our drive to work today. My mom doesn’t say much, she just takes Rofhiwa from me and I go take a shower.
Thomas and I decide to shower together because, according to the explanation that we give my mother, we are saving water and time. According to the truth, we love shower hour in our house. The first thing I do is go on my knees and start blowing on him. I need to get him in a good mood because the meeting he will be walking into will have some bad news. He does not reject me. He lets me please him. His hands are on my weave, holding on as his knees become weaker. He shoots in my mouth and collapses to the floor of the shower. He catches his breath and smiles at me as the water hits us from the showerhead.
"Good morning, handsome".
"Hello beautiful. How are you, my love?"
"I'm alright."
"You sure?"
I nod my head.
"How was your meeting this morning?" He asks me.
I sigh and say, "You are not going to be happy with some of the numbers."
He slightly frowns.
"Baby", him.
I look at him.
"Do you think we made a mistake by appointing Palesa as a managing executive? Do you think she's ready?" He asks me.
Am I not just a specialist? How am I being asked to review the performance of a managing executive?
"She's not coping. Thami and Mthunzi are honestly good soldiers. I can rely on them. When one of them are away, the company feels it. She struggles to cover my other MEs when the need arises."
"To be fair, Mthunzi and Thami are directors. This is an unfair comparison. You just mad that she has your girlfriend out of bed so early in the morning." I defend Palesa because shame, she likes me now.
"As your boyfriend, yes, I'm not happy about that. As the CEO, I am bothered that my ME is this dependent on a specialist. It is extremely concerning. Mthunzi was also telling me that she still struggles with some of her work. He wanted to test her and give her his designation of authority while he went on paternity leave, but he didn't want to set the company up for failure like that. Mthunzi is not much of a complainer. He took in Portia for crying out loud and he still approved for her to go to that clinic of hers for the mentally disturbed."
The way he says this is -
But I get his point.
"So what are you going to do? Can't you get HR involved and get Thami to performance manage her then?" I ask him.
"We have so much work, baby. We don't have time to be focusing on begging people to do their jobs. We have to work and we need to deliver. And from what I've heard, these performance things take a long time." He says.
"But baby, you have to be fair. I don't even think that she is aware that she is not performing as expected. She is putting in long hours and is being an even bigger cow towards people in the office. In her head, she is still the star employee." I say.
He sighs.
"I'm thinking that I should give some of her tasks to Harry. That boy is good. He could be managing Palesa, in my opinion." He says.
"Palesa will not take that well. You know she thinks she's the shit." I say.
"I'll make him report into Thami. He and Palesa will be colleagues."
"Are you solving the problem though, baby? You are just going to overwork one employee to avoid managing the performance of the other one?" Me.
We look at each other. His face is tensing up. I didn't realise that this was eating up at him like this.
He cups me in his arms and takes me to bed. We have explosive morning sex. It is amazing!
We leave the house after having breakfast cooked by my mom because she has just appointed herself as our home executive. I think she is trying to save my relationship because I'm so busy at work and Thomas is a man who loves being taken care of. My mom is prepared to do anything to help me, except have sex with him. I'm cool with that. My mom would also rather it be her who cooks and takes care of Rofhi than our helpers. Thomas enjoys this.
As we drive to work, I take the opportunity to speak to Thomas. For a change, he is not on a call while we drive to work.
“Baby, do you think I am a bad mother to Rofhiwa?” I ask him.
He looks at me, analyses me before responding. Then he says, “Why are you asking me this?”
“You have insinuated that my work gets between my ability to be her mother. I took offence to that, Thomas.” I tell him. It is important that he knows.
“Lydia, you are not a bad mother. You are just not present. Rofhiwa is a baby. To you, these may be years that she will not remember when she is older. But the reality is that this is when she is most dependent on you. You first want to send her to crèche at three months and now you have your mother looking after her because you work crazy hours.”
“First of all, kids start crèche at three months – it wasn’t just going to be Rofhiwa. Secondly, I have to work, Thomas. The very company that is keeping me away from her for all these hours is a company that you lead. Working this hard benefits you and the empire that you say you are building for Rofhiwa.” I am actually upset now.
“Things have changed, baby. You need to understand that. When it was just you and me, the sexiest thing about you was you being in the office and making us a lot of money. We have a beautiful baby girl, now. We are her parents. It would mean a lot to me and to her if you are the kind of mother to her as you are an asset to the company. Sometimes, you treat her as if she is standing in the way of your career progression.”
I am deeply hurt by this and he can see it. He tries to hold my hand, but I don’t let him. I actually cry. He keeps looking at me.
“I love my child, Thomas.” I say between my sobs.
“I know baby. Just switch off when you get home and show her that. If I, the CEO, can do it, so can you.” He says.
...
Thomas
Rubbish! Absolute nonsense! They woke my girlfriend up at 6am for this SHIT?! I need Mthunzi back from that paternity leave.
"How long is paternity leave again?" I ask these people sitting in front of me and presenting rubbish.
"Two weeks, sir. But Mthunzi will only be back after a month. He took additional days", Palesa tells me.
"He needs to come back and fire all of you. What is this? This is what you woke my girlfriend up at 6am for?" I am lashing out because really, I didn't realise things were this bad. Lydia hinted that it’s bad, but I did not anticipate this shit being presented to me. My brothers and other board members will not be happy with this. Palesa is not a fit for this role. She is just not.
I take my things and leave this meeting. We are only fifteen minutes in and it was supposed to be a three hour meeting. I need to go make a plan before Palesa runs us to the bloody ground. Granted, she is not in sales. But product managers, product owners and product specialists report into her. How does she approve products that clearly will not be sold? She drives Lydia for countless reports instead of focusing on the products we need to sell. She is too specialized. She is not an overall manager.
I dial Mthunzi the minute I get to my office. My PA is also not at her desk. She is probably gossiping with someone. I need to get someone to run my office properly. This shit that's happening here is unacceptable.
"Ramaru", he answers his phone.
"You need to fire Palesa", I say.
"Isn't that Thami's job?"
We both laugh.
"We have a serious problem, chief. I need you back." I tell him.
"Let me fuck the wife and ask her properly. If she says yes, I'll be there in an hour." He says.
We laugh.
"Are you back from KZN already?" I ask him.
"We just got back." He says.
"Okay. I'll send your wife some flowers and chocolate. I need you here, chief." I say.
"Okay. Ask no more. I'm on my way." He says.
After we hang up, I take a walk to Thami's office. I see him shouting at Palesa, as he should. I used to think that Pearl was too hard on her and I used to give Pearl a hard time about being so harsh with Palesa. Now I see it. And had I let Pearl just do what she needed to do with Palesa, Pearl would have fired her for me.
I walk to go find my beautiful girlfriend. She's so smart and quite the sight for sore eyes. My PA is missing in action so for today, I am going to need my baby.
She is in Harry's office and they are working on something. I need to talk to her. So I will be interrupting the meeting.
I stand at the door. Harry looks at me. I think he has an issue with me dating Lydia, but it is what it is.
"Sir?" Harry.
"Can I please borrow Lydia for a minute?" I say.
"Sure. We are done, anyway." Harry says.
I turn around and leave. Lydia follows me to my office. The elevator ride to my floor, we look at each other seductively. This dress that she is wearing today is making me want her so badly. She sees me check her out and she smiles at me, giggles actually. She's so hot. Fuck!
We get into my office and I close the door.
She sits on my couch and I sit next to her.
"You look stressed. Harry tells me it went down in the morning meeting. You walked out after fifteen minutes?" She says.
"I want to fire Palesa." I tell her.
She gives me the look that she gave me this morning when I told her I don't have time to performance manage her. But I do appreciate her insights. If this were Pearl, she would be marching to HR already and ensuring the exit paperwork is in place.
"She's drowning. She's not managing. Mthunzi is even on his way to the office to help us", I tell her.
"What exactly is she struggling with?" She asks me.
"Everything. But more specifically, products." I tell her.
"She's never been good at the products work, though. That was never going to change." She says. True. But Pearl hid that very well from me. She shat on Palesa hard enough to get her to know something about products.
"I'm going to give Harry the products stuff. I want you to help him. Please baby", I say to her.
She nods her head. I know I may be overworking her. I must make her a senior specialist at this point. But I'd rather have my other executives suggest it. I don't need to be accused of doing her favours because my dick ejaculates inside of her. She's good at what she does and it's important that she is recognized accordingly.
"Palesa can focus on reporting - it's what she does best. We will give her another portfolio to look after to replace the products work. But if she spends one more minute on products, I will fire her." I say.
She laughs.
"Another thing baby… my PA."
"Is useless", she says.
I laugh.
If Pearl were here, this PA would be long gone. She was good at getting rid of useless people.
"Please manage her for me?" I say.
She is in stitches now. I just laugh too.
"I've been waiting to get my hands on that girl." She says.
Good. Now, I'll see what kind of a leader she would make.
"Thank you, baby. For now, I need some flowers and chocolate delivered to Mthunzi's wife - to thank her for releasing Mthunzi during his paternity leave." I tell her.
"That's sweet of you, baby. Plus, I like Koena. Did I tell you we will be doing pole dancing together to lose this baby fat that you and Mthunzi have left with us?" She says.
"What?" I'm so shocked.
"Yes baby. Maybe we can even think about getting a pole in our bedroom", she says.
Now my hands are running up her thighs.
And then...
A knock on the door.
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ELM transport and Currier7a