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#getting literally slaughtered just for that?? and then later being like 'oh my parents actually did love me...' is just. not normal
horsegirlzero · 2 years
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sophokles tr. by anne carson, antigonick // hino matsuri, vampire knight // anne carson, the task of the translator of antigone
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Tessa was nothing but a victim in this situation tbh. (Murder Drones) [Episode 7 Spoilers Contained Within!]
Click the "Keep reading" button if you don't care or have already seen Episode 7.
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Like, straight up Tessa did not deserve any of this. Now, we don't know how old Tessa actually was but she had to have been either a teenager or a very young adult at most given her appearance.
She presumably grew up in a house with parents who didn't care for her much or paid little attention to her. I mean they would literally chain her up in her room. Like, it's one thing to tell your child to go to their room but literally chaining them up in it?
She had no friends, in fact her only friends were the drones she salvaged from the junkyard which her parents wanted her to get rid of too. (She literally says she's only interacted with her drones outside of her immediate family.)
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Everyone likes to bring up the fact they would lock Cyn in the basement as justification for the things Cyn did and frankly that annoys me.
Now, unless the series reveals more later we don't even know if it's entirely Tessa's fault either. Given what Louisa says when seeing Cyn in Episode 5 "I said this one out of my sight." implies she likely demanded for Cyn to be thrown away previously. For all we know Tessa was hiding her in the basement to prevent them from throwing her out. But for whatever reason Cyn would keep escaping despite it being for her safety. People will probably say I'm giving too much benefit of the doubt here but I feel like it's a reasonable conclusion. Why else would she even bother? If she didn't actually like Cyn she would have just thrown her out as demanded.
Anyway, then one of those drone friends that she rescued from the scrapyard betrays her, slaughters her entire family presumably in front of her then fucking skins her (Whether alive or after killing her we don't know.) despite claiming it wasn't going to discard her previously.
Tessa got the worst fate for basically no reason. And it kind of annoys me when I see people try to justify that. (And yes, I'm not kidding. I've seen it.)
EDIT: Oh yeah and I completely forgot too she treated the drones better than the other humans too who would literally kill them for minor mistakes.
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c-is-for-circinate · 3 years
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As promised: let's talk Hades, and how acts of abuse can create toxic environments for everyone around them, and also how people react to those environments--and to them being disrupted.
(For reference, I have just kicked Theseus's ass for the first time, it was exactly as satisfying as it was intended to be, and then I got predictably slaughtered a couple of chambers into Styx. Spoilers for everything through that point, but please no spoilers in reblogs/comments for anything after that!) Also, TW for a whole lot of discussion of abuse, particularly verbal and emotional abuse, and abusive familyworkplace dynamics.
Okay, so. To start out with, Hades is an abusive parent. He engages in innumerable acts of verbal and emotional abuse towards his son, because yep, that's what you call it when a parent constantly berates and belittles their kid for every perceived failure, including the ones the parent themselves could have prevented. Sometimes especially the ones the parent could have prevented. Zagreus failed at his office clerk job because Hades refused to teach him how to do it and then blamed him for not already knowing how. Cerberus tore up the lounge because Hades, who was actually there, chose not to stop him. Hades created, possibly deliberately, and then took full advantage of every opportunity he saw to insult and demean his kid, and the clerk job flashback shows us that he was doing so even before the escape attempts started. I'm pretty sure we're all on the same page here, but: yep, that all constitutes abuse, even if they're gods. Even if Hades has reasons for Being Like That. Even if you think Zagreus seems okay and unharmed by it (which: repeatedly throwing yourself into a gauntlet of violence that inevitably ends in your own pain and death because you're so desperate to escape home, not actually an indicator of someone who's okay). We all good on that?
Cool. Because I'm not really here to talk about how Hades' abuse directly impacts Zagreus right now (although there's for sure an essay in that too). I'm thinking about how it impacts everybody else.
Hades isn't as obviously unreasonable with anybody else in his kingdom the way he is with his kid. When we see him lecture somebody else, it's usually for an actual failure to do their job: Hypnos for literally falling asleep on the job and not doing anything that was assigned to him, Megaera for letting us past her so many time, Orpheus for being a court bard who refuses to sing. His attitude is super confrontational and unpleasant, but on the surface it doesn't necessarily look as fucked-up. Thing is, though, whether any individual act of aggression towards an employee/family member is justified or not (I would generally argue 'not', because aggression towards employees/family members is, y'know, not justifiable)--it's not about the individual acts. It's about the entire cultivated atmosphere of toxicity and abuse.
One of the very first things Meg ever says to us is, "I'd rather be on your bad side than his." Up until that point, we've got no reason to believe Meg has any history whatsoever of fucking up at her job. In fact, we've got plenty of reason to believe she's good at it. She's fiercely proud of it, she's frequently Employee Of The [Time Period], and we've apparently never even met her sisters because she handles her shit herself. But she's still scared of Hades. Dusa, who is an anxious wreck at all times because oh god what if she gets fired what if she gets fired what if she gets fired, in spite of apparently being absolutely exemplary at her job, is scared of Hades. Every single shade in the Hall is clearly terrified of Hades, and it's not because of what he's done to each of them. It's what they've seen him do to other people.
Which is how toxic environments work, whether they're work environments or families. The Court of Hades is of course both, always, with the bonus hell layer of you can't quit even if you DIE. An abuser in authority doesn't have to target you in order to make you feel scared, cowed, and desperate to please them. Humans (and gods who are basically extra-powerful humans) are good at learning by example. The residents of the Court get the picture.
So this Court is a minefield--and everyone except Zagreus is very good at tiptoeing around mines. We see it in Meg, so desperate to do her job well. We see that Hypnos very clearly does not give a shit about anything, but he still makes sure to have a list of excuses ready if/when Hades ever confronts him about failure to do his job, just in case. We see it when Achilles tells us that my ability to help you is constrained by the authority your father gives me, or whatever the line was sixty runs ago when he couldn't let me into locked chambers. The system, such as it is, works, and if Nyx talks to Hades as little as possible, if Thanatos avoids the Court entirely, if Achilles treads very carefully and knows how to keep his head down--well that's just the system, right? That's just how things are.
Even Zagreus seems to have had a role in that system as the court fuckup. He's the kid who didn't have a real job or purpose. He could take the focus of Hades' generalized, day-to-day ire off of everyone else, without triggering some of the more direct and violent ire because the work he was doing didn't really matter (a LOT of Hades' rage-triggers seem to be related to job performance, which means that the people with real jobs are of course the most at risk). And he could do so "safely" (big emphasis on the quotation marks there) because he alone of the court is Hades' actual kid, who's Prince of the Underworld no matter how much he fucks up. If one of Nyx's other kids gets something really really wrong, she might be able to protect them from some consequences, but Hades doesn't have any layer of supposed parental affection holding him back from getting violently furious about it. Zagreus gets a nice bedroom and the abuse is limited to words rather than divine power, and Hades is a dick to everyone but he only occasionally condemns people to eternities of torture, and only for good reasons like refusing to sing when your job is to be court bard, so it's fine, everybody's fine, everything's totally fine, right?
Except it's not fine when everybody is so clearly worried about anything going wrong. And it's especially not fine for Zagreus, who's the person to finally say no. He's leaving, for his own sake, because he deserves better and he's finally convinced he can have it. And that turns the whole system into disarray.
I am endlessly fascinated by the ways this game portrays different characters reacting to this upheaval in their carefully-mapped minefield. It's different for authority figures and peers and servants, different based on how people are positioned in the house under Hades' rule, and it's so spot-on and I love it.
Nyx, for instance, is absolutely calm about the whole thing, because Nyx has power. Hades can't hurt her. Hades can't even really do much against her children, not when Hypnos and Thanatos are gods in their own right. Yes, Hades rules the kingdom, but Nyx owns the land, and she gives no shits about his rages. And it's interesting, too, to see the lines she doesn't draw. The deal seems to be that Hades doesn't fuck with her, and doesn't outright threaten her kids (because Hypnos is bad at his job, demonstrably so, and Hades hasn't ruined him yet), and she doesn't interfere with the way he treats the people around him. She gives Zagreus advice and support and the mirror, but she also doesn't take a direct stand against Hades. He can't hurt her, but he could make life...difficult. She's protected, her position in the minefield is more of a safe viewing platform than slogging through the middle of it, but the mines are still there.
And then we have Achilles, who is one of my favorite characters in the whole game because of how he reacts to this whole situation. Achilles, like Nyx, is so supportive. Every single time you see him he has something encouraging to say. He gives us his Codex, secretly finds us weapons, trained us for years, clearly wants us to succeed. And still he's limited, not necessarily out of fear for himself (though he has to be scared for himself, he knows what Hades does to people who anger him), but out of concern that if he gives Zagreus too much help in one way, he won't be able to provide help at all later. He's still so careful.
Achilles and Nyx are so fucking important to this story because they're the only authority figures Zagreus really has in his life except for his father, and they are so supportive. They're what keep this story from being a nightmare of psychological horror and depression. They can't stop the pressure from Hades and this life in his house being miserable for Zag, but they can give us hope, remind us that Zagreus is still loved. And they have such an incredibly important role when it comes to guilt, which is one of the biggest ways toxic systems maintain themselves.
If Zagreus leaves, what happens to everybody else? Who takes Hades' wrath then? Who becomes court scapegoat if he's not there, and also, who gets punished for his escape? These questions matter, and we see him worry about it! He asks Nyx and Achilles both, is it going to be okay that you're helping me, are you going to be alright, will my father hurt you for this? And they are both so firm about telling him no. No, I will be fine. See, here's the list of reasons about why I'm going to be fine, why my position in this minefield is secure. They make a point of telling us that it's fine, that we do not need to hold ourself back from getting out of this abusive situation for their sake. That is instrumental in Zagreus's ability to keep making these escape attempts without feeling too guilty and worried and selfish to go on. (Another thing that's actually really important in setting up that dynamic--we see that Hades cares about Cerberus, even if he's using him as a pawn against us, and Cerberus seems to be the one figure in court who Hades doesn't get mad at. The dog isn't at risk, and that is really essential in keeping the story from getting too grim.) These people who we care about refuse to let themselves be held hostage to secure our good behavior.
It's also really useful for raising the stakes later in the story--we see Hades arguing with Nyx once or twice, and we see Zagreus feeling guilty about it, but it's also a sign that we're making enough progress to piss him off. After I finally made it out of Elysium on my last run, I came home to find him furious with Achilles in a way that actually makes me nervous, because Achilles does not have nearly as much security in his position as he says he does. (Achilles is such a good teacher/authority figure, because he knows goddamn well what Hades could do to him, and still refuses to let fear for his own situation stop him from helping the abused kid under his care escape his. And no, not everybody has the capacity to do that, but it matters so much coming from the guy who helped raise us. It matters so much. I do not even have the words for how much.)
It's also no mistake that many of the people we find supporting us along our journey are either the people with the most power in their immediate environment, or the least. Sisyphus helps us because what more could they do to me than this? Orpheus is a little wild around the eyes and somewhat disconnected from reality, and he wishes us the best because someone should get what they want and also he no longer gives a single fuck what happens to him. Eurydice has her own cozy little corner of Asphodel, as safe from Hades' rage as anybody anywhere in his realm because she's tucked in such an out-of-the-way middle place she's outside his notice. Dusa is so scared of everything anyway that, crush aside, she isn't any more threatened by us escaping than she is just by her everyday life here. Charon is unfathomable and unstoppable; Skelly literally exists to be a punching bag, and yet he also seems basically immune to pain, no matter what we do to him. There's no threat from Hades there.
So the people most at risk when I flip the world on its ear are the ones who have so much standing that they have something to lose, but not enough to protect them from losing it. Which of course brings us to Than and Meg--who are, of course, the two people who also seem by far the most upset by my attempts to leave.
As authority figures, Nyx and Achilles are constantly reinforcing the message that it's Hades' fault, not ours, if they or anybody else get caught in the crossfire of his wrath. I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing, and it's not my guilt to bear. From Megaera and Thanatos, we get the opposite message--I am fucking with things, I am hurting people, and I need to stop. Zagreus isn't just abandoning them, as a friend or brother or lover or all of the above they're Greek gods who even knows. He's betraying them. They were in this together, as friends or lovers or whatever, but now Zagreus is sending earthquakes through the minefield they both still have to stand in. He is about to capsize this boat in the middle of a thunderstorm, he is fucking with the system, and they're the ones who are going to get most hurt.
I'm so curious how this is going to work for Than, who out of everyone we meet holds the closest role to Nyx's in terms of being sheltered from Hades' wrath. He's the guy who gets to leave, after all, even though he always has to come back. I've seen the least of him out of anybody so far because it took forever for me to get to Elysium, but two things really stand out and I'm so interested to see where they go. One, he really genuinely does care about Zagreus. He wants us safe, he wants us unhurt, the accessory he gives us only grants its bonus if we clear a room without taking injury, he keeps showing up to help. And two, he wants us to give up and go back and recognize how good we had it. Which is SO fucking interesting, considering how miserable Zagreus so clearly was, and how legitimate his reasons for being miserable were.
It makes me wonder so much about Than's standards for comparison. Does he know something we don't about what's waiting for us on the surface, something that might theoretically hurt Zagreus even more than staying down below? Has his life, which apparently allows him more freedom than anybody else in the Court, sucked horribly in ways we haven't seen, and that's why he spends so little time there in the first place? Either of those things is plausible, both of those things are plausible, and yet either one leads to this sense of patronizing, because he refuses to simply tell us. If something terrible is awaiting us, don't give us vague warnings, tell us what it is and let us decide for ourself! If you're fucking jealous because we might get out entirely and you're still stuck coming back here, say so. If you're worried about your mom--and he does bring her up, how could Zagreus turn his back on her like that, does seem to worry for her--then let's have an actual conversation about how many times she has insisted I do this and also how much I love her.
And, right, it's clear that a lot of Thanatos being upset is simply, you were going to leave me without even saying goodbye, you want to leave ME, which is understandable! But, like, he is demonstrably the one god who gets to visit the surface. He's the one person we actually COULD expect to see again. And he is absolutely also upset because there's an Order To Things, and we're fucking it up. We used to be his careless callow reckless friend who could talk back to Hades and get away with it, and now we're not, and everything is changing and we might leave him altogether, and we might leave him alone in that court without us, and he hates it.
Is it a short-sighted, selfish fear on his part? Yes, absolutely. Even if he's not scared of Hades on his own behalf, he is still frightened by what happens if we upset this system--and maybe it's the sanctity of a much bigger system than the Underworld that he's worried about! Maybe it's the whole divine and cosmic order. Whatever system he wants so badly to protect is enabling the abuse Zagreus has been dealing with for however-long he's been alive. Whatever system he wants so badly to protect OUGHT to be overturned, or at least shaken up. But this is what toxic systems DO. They convince the people within them that they have to be maintained, that a broken system that hurts the people within it is far better than no system at all, that changing the world is too scary and too dangerous. And Thanatos wants his whatever-Zagreus-is-to-him to be there, because he loves him and also because that's how the world works, and those things are all tangled up in one another, and that is how relationships are in a messed-up family like this so therefore I love it.
And Meg. Meg, the best for last, my dear, beautiful, furious, bitter, scared angry tired girl. I adore her. I am absolutely never going to date her, because the thing Zagreus needs most in his life hurts her, more directly than anybody else in the story, and that sucks, and it's not Zag's fault but they still shouldn't be together. Meg has taken more injury from this situation than anyone, quite literally as well as metaphorically, and it's not her fault any more than it's ours, but oh boy it has made her lash out and it's awful and it's perfect.
Meg's place in the Court of Hades is unique because she's not dead, not a mortal, not anything other than a god--but she's also not family. Nyx is not her mother. She's very much part of this system, she and her two sisters belong to Hades-the-realm and therefore also Hades-the-king, she can't leave, but she also doesn't have that protection of Nyx watching out for her in the same way. She's not royalty. She and her sisters (if you ask Hesiod instead of Virgil, which seems to be the interpretation the game's going with here) sprang from the blood of maimed Uranus at the same time as Aphrodite, but fuck knows Aphrodite isn't claiming them as siblings. And she can't be fired, exactly, but she sure can be demoted, and she sure can be made miserable in her job. Meg is vulnerable in a way very few people in Hades' employ are. She's a lot harder to do away with than any one random shade, but she's also a lot harder to miss blending in with a crowd.
What's more, she's the one person in this whole mess who is specifically tasked with stopping us from leaving. Hypnos isn't ordered to put us to sleep and keep us in our room. Thanatos can't be compelled or punished if he doesn't hunt us down. Achilles isn't told to lock us up and keep the keys. Meg is the one stationed at the doorway to Tartarus to keep us in. Meg is the one who gets in trouble when we leave. Meg (who Hades knows goddamn well Zagreus cares for, or cared for, who he absolutely knows we used to date) is the one who has to fight us again and again and again. And she's the one who keeps dying.
Again, it's this incredibly fucked-up guilt/hostage situation deliberately designed to keep people from fleeing abusive situations. Meg's insistence on fighting us now puts Zagreus in the position of having to hurt her himself again and again. Now suddenly we're the ones sticking a sword in our ex-girlfriend. Now suddenly someone can point to our desire to leave, to flee, to escape, and say, how selfish. How cruel. How terrible of us to want to go, when we're even willing to hurt the people we love to do it.
Except, right: Hades is the one who demands Meg stand there and stop us. Hades is the one who puts both of us in that position. Meg is also in an abusive situation, and she's willing to hurt us to protect herself. "I'd rather be on your bad side than your father's." It's easy to blame her at the start for being complicit, for being a tool of our father's abuse, for being on his side. It gets harder as the game goes on. I've killed her so many times. There's no way for her to beat me. She knows at this point that she can't beat me. She still fights, every single time, still throws herself upon that spike, not because she thinks she has any chance of stopping me but because she is so damn scared of what will happen if she doesn't try.
In fact, Meg's the one person we have actually seen face consequences for our actions so far, instead of just facing the threat of them. Her sisters are here. Her sisters, who she clearly does not want here, who are wild and violent and who she does not want in her life or anywhere near her, let alone near the job she takes so much pride in. She gets to deal with them now. (Hades doesn't have to deal with them. They're still not allowed in his court. But Meg does.) She gets stabbed, and bludgeoned, and shot, and lightning-struck, and poisoned, and every other thing we do to her. Thanatos doesn't. Nyx and Achilles and Hypnos don't. Bug Meg? Oh yes. Meg pays.
And yes, ok, she is complicit in this system. Everybody is complicit in this system. Zagreus who's trying to escape on his own behalf instead of overthrowing his father for the sake of everyone he'd otherwise be leaving behind is complicit in this system. Pointing fingers and pulling strings of who's more at fault? and who do we blame for this? is exactly how this sort of system perpetuates itself. Your sister always talked back at the dinner table and put everyone in an even worse and more violent mood. Your coworker refuses to work more than forty hours a week so now you have to take overtime to pick up their slack. You're enabling your dad by asking your sister to shut up, you're enabling your employer by working as hard as you do so you don't get fired, everyone's at fault, everyone's to blame, everyone is--
It's not everyone. It's Hades. It's Hades at the root of everything, and probably something big and institutional and fucked-up even beyond him. But even if everyone down in this Underworld does have to be trapped here forever, even if he's trapped here forever, Hades is neither challenging the system that put them here nor trying to make that fate better for anyone else stuck with him. He's just created an entire kingdom of backbiting and misery and people who can either go along with his whims or suffer the consequences.
At this point in the game, Meg is so fucking tired. Every time we run into her in the lounge, hunched over a table, the venom in her voice when she tells us "Do I look like I have anything to say to you?" is so bitter and so exhausted. There was a system, and she knew her place in the system, and it was a system divinely ordered by the gods themselves, and sure it was cruel but that's the literal will of the universe as far as she knows it. She had a role, and her role was vengeance and punishment and violence against those who'd committed the most egregious of sins in life, and there was a point to it, she was the divine deterrent to convince people not to do those things, and that was just, and that was right. The GODS THEMSELVES said so. How do you argue with that? You can't possibly argue with that!
And Zagreus is arguing with that. In trying to leave, he's questioning the unbreakable rule that nothing in the Underworld ever gets to leave it. In disobeying his father to do so, he's questioning the unbreakable rule that what the gods say is LAW. He's breaking everything.
And of course he's not trying to do any of that. He's not trying to destabilize the system at all. He's just trying to get himself out of it, to a place where he feels like he belongs and maybe a parent who's slightly nicer to him than this one. But toxic systems like this one break when the people within them have access to another option. When the kids find a way to actually leave, and not answer the phone, and not come home for holidays, and not deal with it any more. When the employees have the economic freedom to quit. When opportunities granted by education, money, social support, etc etc etc, show up and give people a choice. Even if the option is only ever for Zagreus--he's demonstrating that an option exists. Which is, of course, the one thing the system cannot ever allow.
I really like this game.
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clanwarrior-tumbly · 3 years
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Knight in Shining Red Armor | Dante + Child!Reader (DMC 4)
A/N: Hey so this is a rewrite of one of my first (and only) DMC fic from like...2016. This takes place post-DMC 4
You can read the og one on my DeviantArt! But if you're here for the new one then I hope ya'll enjoy!
Summary: Child!Reader was taken under Dante's wing after being saved from a demon invasion, but even years later he hesitates to tell them what he truly is, fearing they'll resent him for his demonic heritage.
............
"Hey, um..Dante?"
"What's up, kiddo?" The red-clad devil hunter asked, though he wasn't completely paying attention to you. Rather he was sitting at his desk, feet kicked up as he was flipping through a magazine.
Meanwhile you were roaming around the shop, stopping only to gaze at the massive curved sword with glowing gems hanging on the wall behind him. He mentioned claiming many weapons--"Devil Arms" as they were called--from defeated demons, but you were curious about their names.
"Just wondering..what's that sword behind you called?"
"The Sparda. It sealed the barrier between the Underworld and human world. Nero went through hell and back, quite literally, to return it to me, so don't even think about touching......it?"
Dante put the magazine down as he turned to see you holding the Sparda in your small hands. You smiled triumphantly, but stumbled a bit before the blade accidentally slammed into the wooden floor, making you wince.
"Oops."
Yet your little act amused him, as he chuckled and shook his head. "You're a little too young to go devil-hunting, I'm afraid. But maybe one day you will."
"And maybe you can help pay off Dante's debt, too." Trish lightly joked as she entered the room, taking the giant sword from you and putting it back on the wall.
Her words were responded by a groan from the male, who went back to reading.
"Whatcha reading?"
Dante slowly lowered the magazine to see you sitting on his desk, but he just snapped it shut and tossed it into the trash, out of your line of sight. "Nothing that eyes like yours gotta see."
"Okay....ooooooh, what's this briefcase?" Hopping off the desk, you ran over to Pandora and crouched down to poke the skull emblem.
"Pandora. That baby can turn into six hundred and sixty six different weapons, but...right now we only have access to seven." Now he was feeling like an exhausted teacher on a museum trip, trying to explain each exhibit to his hyper first graders--the exhibits being his Devil Arms.
Yet as you ran around asking him about more of them, he couldn't help but see his childhood-self reflected in you. Just full of energy and never-ending curiosity and optimism.
Yeah..he definitely saw the resemblance.
Eventually you decided to leave him be and dash off to your room.
And only then did Dante drop his smile, sighing as he put both feet back on the ground. He ran a hand through his hair before dragging it down the side of his face tiredly.
"You know..you'll have to tell them eventually." Trish reminded.
"How, though? That kid's afraid of all demons..hybrids or not. I'm pretty sure saying "oh by the way the guy who rescued you is actually half-demon" is gonna send 'em running, and...I can't risk that." He shook his head, gazing at the jukebox in the corner.
"But I think [y/n]'s old enough to comprehend the concept of not all demons being evil," Lady chimed in after overhearing the conversation. "Just give it to them straight and I'm sure they'll understand."
As much as Dante wanted to argue, he saw that she had a valid point. But he still worried...
How would you react?
It's been a few years since he saved you from a Mega Scarecrow, though it turned out that more demons invaded your neighborhood, slaughtering everyone you knew and loved. And as he took you back to the shop to patch you up, he could see the terror in your eyes, any traces of innocence long gone.
No child should have gone through such a tragedy.
A tragedy that he was all-too familiar with.
After the defeat of the Savior, things have been looking up. You've regained your happiness as you lived in Devil May Cry and learned of Dante's tales of devil hunting, though the memories of that horrible night never truly left you alone.
Along with that, just seeing a demon is enough to make you run and hide, and you were terrified when you first met Nero and saw his demonic arm.
From that incident alone, Dante became extremely reluctant to tell you of his own demonic heritage.
He just didn't know if he's only hurting you more by keeping it hidden..
...............
Later that night, you were plagued by yet another nightmare. Different demons, same neighborhood...same deaths of your loved ones.
But in this one Dante got hurt, too. And you tried so hard to be brave for him, even shouting in the demon's face...but in the end you failed as it snatched you away, dragging you into the darkness of the Underworld before he could reach you.
Although you calmed down since awakening, you wanted to be sure he was alright.
So with what little moonlight shone in the shop's darkness, you located the worn sofa where Dante laid. He was engrossed in some TV program, though after sensing your presence his eyes flickered to you.
No words had to be exchanged in order for him to see what was wrong, as he sat up and patted the spot beside him. You smiled in relief and climbed onto the sofa, snuggling into his side as he wrapped an arm around you. "Th-Thanks, Dante."
"No prob. So uh..another nightmare, I guess?"
"Yeah, but..they hurt you, too and...I-I tried staying brave. I shouted at them to leave you alone and..they didn't listen. But...I think one of them looked scared of me."
"Wow." He raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Gotta say I'm impressed."
"Really?"
"Absolutely. Y'know demons are used to seeing kids scream and cry, not take a stand against them. Plus that's pretty epic of you to defend me, so thanks." With a smile, he ruffled your hair.
"You're welcome," you giggled a bit. "But..I really just wanna be as brave as you. I mean...Nero says you laugh at giant demons and tease them all the time. How do you do that without being scared?"
"Well..it comes with the business. Getting them riled up just makes the fight more fun. At least for me. You might think I'm crazy but if ya decide to hunt demons one day...you'll see what I mean."
"But until then, could I watch you fight one? Like a big bad one?"
"......."
"Dante?"
"..kid, there's a reason I never took you on any missions." Dante sighed, swallowing back the growing lump in his throat as he carefully planned his next words. "And how I always...bounce back from getting smacked by a demon tail. No human would be able to withstand that without some broken bones."
"Oh?" You tilted your head. "Then..how can you if you're human?"
"....because I'm not fully human."
As much as he wanted to shut up, he decided to tell you the truth once and for all, not sugarcoating anything:
He explained how his parents were a demon and human--a forbidden romance which resulted in himself and Virgil being born. His bloodline allowed them to blend in with humans, exercise their demonic abilities in battle, and even tap into their true demon forms.
All the while you listened silently, with not much emotion on your face. So it was hard for him to tell what you were probably thinking in this moment.
It scared him.
"...and that's it." He sighed, closing his eyes and looking away from you. "So go ahead and hate me if you want. I won't blame you for-"
"Can you show me?"
Dante blinked stupidly as he swung his head back towards you, wondering if he heard you right.
"I...wish you told me before, but I don't wanna be scared of demons anymore." You smiled a tiny bit as you elaborated. "Especially not one who helped me. So...can I see your other form?"
"...a-alright. Just...if you get scared I can turn back instantly, so don't freak."
"I won't."
He had doubts you'll keep your word, but he got up and activated his Devil Trigger form. As he opened his eyes, you gasped upon seeing how much they were glowing--being orange rather than blue. Red electric sparks danced around his metallic body as he observed you close, anticipating your reaction. He expected you to scream or cry.
Yet..there was only curiosity and wonder in your eyes.
"Scared yet?" He asked in his distorted voice, crouching down in front of you.
Not even the way he spoke startled you, as you just shook your head. "I was wrong all along..not all demons are bad."
"Not even this one?"
"Nope. You look awesome..like a knight in shiny red armor."
"...wow..I um...." For once, the talkative devil hunter was at loss for words. But when you learned forward to hug him around the neck, he was completely shocked.
Earlier in the day he thought of countless worse-case scenarios, and yet...the best-case was happening right now.
You were accepting him, hugging him even.
He couldn't believe it.
Dante smiled as he wrapped his arms around you, making sure his armor spikes didn't hurt you. "Thanks, kid. It really means a lot that you're not terrified anymore........[y/n]?" He was concerned about your lack of response, before realizing you were dozing off.
'Damn..I might make a pretty good dad, after all..' He mused, standing up and making the trek back to your bedroom. Then he set you down and tucked you in, relief and warmth in his heart.
He had a feeling that your nightmares won't be so bad anymore. Now he felt like he could truly protect you.
Why?
Because he was gonna be your knight in shining red armor.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Jeez, man. Quit clanking around shit and---AH!!! WHAT THE FUCK?!!"
"Shhhh! Chill out, Nero. You'll wake 'em." Dante was quick to shift back to his human form once he was outside your room, glaring at his nephew. "Why are you so freaked out? This ain't the first time you've seen my devil form."
"But still..why in the middle of the night?! Thought we had company."
"...just go back to bed, kid."
"Don't call me kid!"
254 notes · View notes
neonnoir-ao3 · 3 years
Text
Some Words of Comfort.
Recently, I’ve seen a lot of people (especially those who have read spoilers/are actively searching for leaked content) lament about their future reactions to the deaths of our beloved characters in-game.
We all knew this was inevitable, and that them living was not an option for the plot of the game, but the time has finally come to face it head-on.
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I understand that someone outside this community might be like “it’s just a game”, but I know it’s way more than that to many: the concept of a female villain that, to many, can be seen as sympathizable and even endearing, is a bit of a new concept— especially on such a large scale as this instance.
In addition, Lady Dimitrescu and her daughters have become a bit of a comfort item for some (with an emphasis on sapphics/wlw, from what I’ve seen personally) in the form of a large, protective, and caring hypothetical partner, or even just a maternal character one can appreciate simply because of her love for her children. Regardless, most of us are here due to some desire for comfort.
Take my own story with this community, for example:
(tws for death, covid, suicide, and general medical emergencies)
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Frankly, 2020 and the beginning of 2021 have ruined me. I lost two men who were the only two positive father figures I’ve ever had. The last of the two tested positive for covid and deteriorated within days, to the point where less than a week after testing positive, my family was making the choice to pull the plug. This all occurred days before Christmas and my birthday. On the first day of the spring semester, having not had the time to properly mourn my grandfather, my mother is in the ER for multiple days with an internal infection that doctors said likely would have turned septic if she had waited to come in any longer. This led to three surgeries throughout the next few months. (Oh, and one of my relatives quite literally dropped dead on that first day of class, too). I am also estranged from one of my parents, and they have been trying to contact my family: they have multiple untreated mental illnesses (severe NPD, bipolar, and more) and they are extremely aggressive in that state of mind and they are agitated extremely easily. That only brings more stress, along with resurfacing trauma and related emotions. Every moment of every day has been a struggle. So much so that I failed half of my classes voluntarily simply because I couldn't do them anymore.
To be perfectly honest with you, I didn’t expect to be here right now. I expected that the pain of simply moving forward would have finally overridden my fears of death and that I would have already ended my suffering by now.
Then, in late January, I saw something trending on Twitter. About a new female villain in an upcoming horror game. And it went from there.
As cheesy as it sounds, this fandom and its content seriously saved my life. In the darkest of days, I’ve come to this tag for comfort. The oddest way I found said comfort was through those who were attracted to Alcina aesthetically. I have extremely long-term trauma related to being bullied and being the victim of a hybrid catfishing/'Oreo Game' on early social media by peers in middle school to the point where I do not think of myself as being able to be loved, let alone being worthy of it. Finding this community not only provided a great form of escapism (and opened a door into a fantasy world where I could imagine my own person vampire milf gf), but also gained a little bit of self-esteem (as many of you know, I share a lot of visual qualities with Alcina. -yes, I'm still kinda freaked out about it-) via seeing people where features/attributes like mine were actively praised and desired rather than insulted and pushed away like they have been until now.
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(okay sorry that kinda turned into a trauma dump but I needed to emphasize the fact that this community has seriously helped me during a really dark point in my life, and I know I can't be the only one with that sort of experience)
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What I’m trying to get across here is that, like many others, this community and its content have been comforting and therapeutic, and it really is more than just a game to us. It’s entertaining and even a form of escapism in these extremely trying times. We all have some degree of PTSD from surviving a literal mass plague— and this is something we're using as a method of coping. a distraction. a coping mechanism.
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With that being said, here are some ways to hopefully assist in lessening the emotional stress:
(please note that I am not a mental health professional and these may not be healthy coping mechanisms for everyone.)
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Understand that it’s just a game.
I know, this sounds completely counterintuitive, but it’s more or less about keeping your level of immersion down. Personally, I can’t do scary shit in general: I have to listen to music on low volume while watching dark ARG vids at night or when I’m alone because I get too into it, and then my paranoia kicks in. Sometimes just pausing for a moment and grounding yourself/reminding yourself that this is a video game: a jumble of code and 3D rendering that doesn’t have to affect your views/headcanons if you don’t want it to. Did your favorite character just get slaughtered? Nope, that 3D rendering of them just got un-alived, that’s all.
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Ignorance is Bliss/We are the Captain Now
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Simple: Capcom can’t even pronounce Dimitrescu right, or even acknowledge the way it’s correctly said in Romanian culture itself. How can you trust them to give you a perfect canon? That’s the thing: with that logic, you can’t. What they say is true means little (if anything, for that matter) to your headcanons and preexisting ideas of the Dimitrescus. In short: fuck ‘em.
I’m currently seeking a double major in pop culture, and one of the cool things I’ve learned so far is affirmational vs transformational fandom. Affirmational is where official canon is seen as the law of the land, and followed to a T. Transformational is seen as much more inviting for audiences, allowing them to bend canon as they wish to fit their own creations. This fandom is obviously transformational, so take that game canon, rip it up, and get back to whatever you were doing.
Capcom’s canon is not the end-all, be-all. Far from it, actually.
Want to still acknowledge canon? Godmod your way out of it.
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Character A died? It’d be a shame if they emerged from the rubble they 'died in' a few hours later, very beaten but alive nonetheless... how awful would it be if they sulked away, nursed their wounds, and continued to live... (/s)
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Ignore it completely.
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Remember: give it time. Once the game drops, there w be a wave of grief, but eventually, we as a community will recover, and get back to business as usual. Think about it like the in any way. Stay with the version in your head that makes you happy.
Get Creative!
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If you're into creating fanart, writing fics, or even just posting a list of headcanons, take some advice from the late Carrie Fisher: "Take your broken heart, and make it into art". Make the fluff oneshot of your dreams! Draw the fanart you've been wanting to! dump lighthearted headcanons into the tags! Not only will it cheer you up, but sharing it with the community will spread the love!
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I know a lot of people are struggling with this emotionally (especially with the pandemic making entertainment like this even more important sources of escapism and coping mechanisms) and I hope that, at the very least, I was able to help comfort one person who reads this.
Remember: give it time. Once the game drops, there will be a wave of grief, but eventually, we as a community will recover, and get back to business as usual. Think about it like the flowers that bloom after major wildfires: after a period of loss, some beautiful can still come of it.
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166 notes · View notes
robininthelabyrinth · 3 years
Note
Now I want the story where NMJ is half war god and NHS is half fox spirit, thank you so much xD
based on this tumblr post and Lao Nie’s decision to refer to WRH as A-Han in this one ficlet
on ao3
Nie Zonghui had long ago suspected that his Sect Leader was a madman, but he didn’t really know it for certain until the first time he lost the man while on a bodyguarding mission – his first, and a great honor. 
Supposedly.
“It’s all right,” his father said, looking long-suffering, when he reported back in distress. “He’s an adult, our sect leader, and this is a small city with no major threats in the middle of some idiosyncratic festival celebration for some goddess or another. How much damage can he really do before he sobers up?”
Nie Zonghui stared at his father, then turned to his mother, who was also staring at her husband with an expression of sincere incredulity.
“Lots,” she supplied. “Lots and lots and lots, and that’s assuming he doesn’t get himself killed in the meantime. Why would you even say that?”
“He’s our sect leader, have some respect.”
“I respect the boss bull of the herd, too, but it doesn’t mean I let it go wandering around the fields wherever it pleases!” She shook her head, snorting in a manner not entirely unlike a bull herself. “Well, if we’re very lucky, maybe our cousin will knock up a cow while he’s out and about rather than just breaking things. We could use a direct heir already; he’s not getting any younger.”
“We could use him being properly married is what we could use. I don’t understand why he’s so resistant – ah, Zonghui, you’re still here? Go gather some cultivators and go look for him, but don’t kick up any fuss, and worry too much if you can’t find him at once. He’ll be back to business soon enough.”
He was, if by “soon enough” one meant “after nearly ten days” and by “back to business” one meant “still drunk off his ass and waxing rhapsodic about some girl he met and possibly married”.
“Yes, yes, I’m sure the sun shines out of her ass,” Nie Zonghui’s father said, his face stormy. “You still could’ve told us where you went. Look what you did to poor Zonghui, he’s been wearing down his heels pacing in worry over you!”
“Oh, heels, yes, did I mention that my gorgeous goddess had amazing legs, too?” their sect leader asked with a soppy smile and stars in his eyes, totally uninterested in any of their petty complaints. “She could kill a man with them – oh, but I would die a happy man between those thighs…!”
“Zonghui, go guard the outside door,” his mother told him. “Also, tell his younger sister that she might need to be sect leader sooner than she’d hoped, because I’m going to murder this fucking –”
-
Nie Zonghui was there, too, when ten months later his new little baby cousin was (metaphorically) ditched on their doorstep.
The entire thing was entirely too dramatic for his taste, and yes, he was aware that as a person who chose to dual wield sabers he had very little room to criticize others for being overly dramatic, however correct he might be.
They had been fighting bandits – barely disguised mercenaries, really, probably paid off by the Wen sect to harass them – in what had turned into a particularly bad situation. Three separate regiments had joined together to take advantage of a terrible thunderstorm and ambush them at all once and them with their backs against a raging river, swollen with rain to the precipice of flooding, with no way to retreat except by fleeing on their sabers, abandoning the common people they were protecting and losing all face. 
The sect leader had been raging on the battlefield, saber in hand, but even he had seen that they would need to shortly choose between death and dishonor; Nie Zonghui, close by his side, had seen how his face was split with a terrible scowl as he wracked his brain for more options.
Then there had been a terrible roar of thunder, and then a flash of light that had blinded them all.
Nie Zonghui had immediately noted the anomality of it, thunder first and lightning second, and wondered it if it was some sort of array working against them, especially when the light had not faded away but grown brighter, causing searing pain in his eyes that made him fall and clutch at his face. But he was a good soldier, loyal and true, and he forced his eyes open to squint into the night, looking to see he did not know what.
Through his sun-blindness, he vaguely thought he could see a silhouette not unlike that of a woman, ten feet tall and radiant as the sun, wearing a dress of nine colors and carrying a guandao in her hand that seemed to reach the clouds, but when he blinked again he saw nothing at all.
Or, well, he did see something: all of their enemies were headless, no matter where on the battlefield they were, their bodies dropping like a loosened string of coins where they had been standing and splattering anyone they were fighting with blood as they gawped at the sudden corpses.
Also, the sect leader was suddenly holding something in his arms when he hadn’t been before.
“What’s that?” Nie Zonghui asked, and the sect leader turned towards him. Nie Zonghui squinted, and suddenly wondered if this entire battle had been a very bad dream. “…is that a baby?”
“Yes,” the sect leader said, grinning broadly. “He’s my son!”
“He’s your what,” Nie Zonghui said.
“My son! I didn’t know about him, of course – apparently he came as something of a surprise to her as well – but anyway she thought that it would be more appropriate for me to raise him, all things considered. A baby doesn’t quite fit her lifestyle. What do you think of ‘Mingjue’ as a courtesy name? Good, yes?”
Nie Zonghui suddenly understood why his parents were always cursing all the time.
-
“I don’t see why I need another wife,” the sect leader said. “I already have a son.”
“Don’t you want to give said son a mother?” Nie Zonghui’s mother asked, her arms crossed. “One that isn’t the Dark Lady of the Nine Heavens, the war goddess you somehow managed to knock up without getting killed?”
“She never specified that she was –”
“Someone needs to be Nie-furen,” the sect leader’s younger sister interrupted, “because I am sick and tired of doing the job, and it’s a little difficult to ask a goddess to do it. So you are going to find yourself another one that’s a little closer to the ground this time, you understand me?”
The sect leader nodded and agreed, which was universally agreed upon to be the only appropriate reaction when his beloved meimei said something in that particular tone of voice.
(He did, after a suitable period of time, state that he wanted to make clear that there was no actual evidence that he had knocked up Jiutian Xuannü and that it was quite plausible that the mother of his heir was nothing more than a rogue cultivator of particular strength and possibility even immortality. If Baosan Sanren had managed it, why not someone else?)
At any rate, they brought him several pictures of women that might fit the bill and who would not be too offended at being asked to be a secondary wife – their sect leader swore up and down that he had performed bows with the mother of his first son, rendering him legitimate, and anyway no one was in the mood to see if the maybe-a-goddess would take offense to someone calling her child a bastard – but none seemed to catch their sect leader’s interest.
“Consider visiting a few brothels,” Nie Zonghui’s great-uncle suggested. “Anything to get you back in the habit of thinking about women of a less divine nature – though of course we’d prefer that she be literate.”
The sect leader scowled and stalked off to go night-hunting instead.
“I don’t like brothels,” he said to Nie Zonghui as they made their way through an especially deserted mountain valley in search of something that had murdered all the local mensfolk in the surrounding villages with especial viciousness. “Surely there’s an option in between.”
Nie Zonghui preferred his sabers to either men or women, but he obediently wracked his brain to think of where people in stories and famous songs found their wives. “Innkeeper’s daughters?” he finally suggested.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” the sect leader scoffed, but the very next day, he decided to break his usual habit of staying out in the wild no matter the weather in favor of taking shelter from the encroaching storm in a small inn right at the base of an especially lonesome and nasty-looking cliff.
“We’re always happy to have guests,” the innkeeper said with a somewhat sinister smile – he was pale as a ghost in the guttering candlelight, and his lips looked very red. “My daughter will show you to your rooms.”
The daughter in question was inhumanly beautiful: small and graceful, with a fox’s face and dark hair that fell to her knees.
“Wow,” the sect leader said, staring at her. “You know, I think you could kill me with those nails of yours.”
Nie Zonghui took a look and agreed with the sentiment, seeing that her nails were as long as claws and looked just as sharp, but apparently he and the sect leader had somewhat different interpretations of this sequence of events and plans on how to address it.
Namely, Nie Zonghui pointed out that the lady was obviously some sort of yao or maybe a gui and that she was probably the one seducing the local mensfolk, draining their yang energy and then slaughtering them, and therefore that it was undoubtedly their duty as cultivators – and cultivators of the Nie sect in particular – to put an end to her vile deeds through the swift application of their sabers. Furthermore, he explained, they should take care never to allow themselves to be alone with her in the process, lest she seek to entrance them with her seductive magics and lure them to their undoubtedly violent deaths.
The sect leader’s rebuttal to this line of logic was limited to “I’m the sect leader and if I want to bang the probably-a-ghost, I’m going to bang the ghost and there’s nothing you can do to stop me”.
Amazingly enough, the sect leader did not end up dead the next day – the innkeeper looked just as surprised as Nie Zonghui felt – and instead announced, very happily, that he was planning on marrying her.
“You what,” the innkeeper said, staring at his very smug-looking ‘daughter’. In light of dawn, she was wearing a dress of many colors with a foxfur ruff, and her beauty was almost painful to behold.
“You why,” Nie Zonghui moaned.
“You shut up,” the sect leader told him. “I’ll have you know that my lady here is very clever, literate and well-learned, and she doesn’t at all mind being the second wife. Weren’t you one of the ones on my case about getting a Nie-furen to help managing things back home?”
“I didn’t think we needed to specify that the person in question didn’t murder a lot of people!”
“Isn’t his first wife supposedly a war goddess?” the lady inquired, her clever eyes dancing in amusement.
“Well…yes…”
“Also, all those men deserved it,” she said. After a brief pause, she added, “In my opinion as a totally unrelated observer, of course.”
“See?” the sect leader said, putting his arm around her waist. “No problem. Anyway, she’ll stick to killing bad people from now on, it’s fine.”
The lady smiled. There were many teeth in that smile, and they were very sharp.
“If she doesn’t, I’ll have my first wife discipline her,” the sect leader added and her smile abruptly disappeared.
Nie Zonghui coughed into his hand, but reluctantly admitted that maybe this wouldn’t turn out to be as bad as all that.
-
“Huaisang is a lovely name,” Nie Zonghui’s mother said, being the best of them at diplomacy when she put her mind to it, although admittedly it was something she did only very rarely. “I think we were just expecting something a little different, that’s all.”
“Possibly something a little more fox related,” Nie Zonghui’s father said.
“Please,” the sect leader’s second wife said. “That would be gauche.”
They looked at her.
“…all of my suggestions along those lines got rejected,” she admitted, and glared at the small shrine in the corner as if it had personally wronged her. In this context, it very well might have.
“Is there anything we should keep an eye out for?” Nie Zonghui said, watching his little cousin carry around his even littler cousin under his arm as if he were a sack of potatoes and not a baby that hadn’t yet had its first month celebration. He would have interfered but for the fact that little Nie Huaisang seemed to be notably more in control of his various limbs than the usual infant. “A tail, for instance?”
“Oh, no,” the second lady said. “Nothing like that.”
“Great,” Nie Zonghui said. “I’m glad to hear it.”
“It’s very rare for fox children to achieve a grand plot worthy of a tail in their first lifetime.” A pause. “From what I understand, that is.”
“Great,” Nie Zonghui said. “…great.”
“You’ll take good care of him when I’m gone, won’t you?” she asked, and when they all looked at her, smiled. “Not for another year or two, don’t worry, but I really can’t stay here that long. Sometimes, a girl’s got urges she has to take care of.”
“The sort of urges where we’d need to hunt down a mysteriously appearing fox yao for having murdered a lot of people?”
“I already promised to stop killing people,” she said sulkily. “Although I do think I made some plausible arguments in favor of a little bit of entirely justified murder in connection with the Jin sect and maybe the Lan sect and, oh, the Jiang sect –”
“Please don’t.”
“It’s not my fault your Great Sects are all headed by men who wrong women.”
“You’re not wrong,” Nie Zonghui’s mother said, and Nie Zonghui’s father looked alarmed. “But still, don’t.”
“You’re such spoilsports. But no, as it happens, it’s getting to that time when I need to return home for a while to pay my respects to the older generation.”
“How often does that happen?” Nie Zonghui’s father asked. “Once a century?”
“A gentleman shouldn’t ask a lady her age,” she sniffed. “At any rate, my family home is rather far away and they’re fairly insular, so I’ll probably be gone for at least a decade or so. I’d take the baby with me, but, well, you know, long travel and all. He’s better off sticking with his father.”
“All right,” Nie Zonghui’s mother said. “We understand, and we’ll help take care of him as best we can.”
“I’m glad.”
“We have only one thing to ask of you in return.”
Their second lady arched her delicate eyebrows.
Nie Zonghui’s mother smiled. “You be the one to tell your sister-in-law that you’re leaving your post.”
“…you know, on second thought, maybe I can push my departure out a few more years…”
-
“Before you say anything, I want to be clear right now that I don’t need a third wife,” their sect leader said. “I’m fine.”
“Sect Leader,” Nie Zonghui’s mother said, not unaffectionately. “You’re not allowed a third wife.”
“And therefore – wait, really?” he asked, a little skeptically. “You’re not concerned about me?”
“Oh, we’re very concerned about you,” Nie Zonghui’s father said. “But not in that specific respect. Some celibacy would probably be good for you, at least in terms of increasing your life expectancy.”
“…my sister is lying in wait with a cleaver to make sure she doesn’t have to take on the duties of Nie-furen again, isn’t she.”
“I’m not discounting that possibility, but don’t worry about it, it’s fine, we’ll talk to her. The Lan sect haven’t had a proper hostess in years either, we can just say we’re following their example.”
The sect leader eyed his cousins beadily. “They haven’t had a proper sect leader in years, either.”
“No, you don’t say,” Nie Zonghui’s mother said dryly. “What a coincidence -”
“You have two fine sons,” Nie Zonghui’s father said hastily. “That seems like enough, really.”
“You don’t think they need a mother…?”
“Sect Leader,” Nie Zonghui interjected politely. “While we admit that it may be within your capabilities to be able to find a mother willing to deal with one step-son who has been waiving around a saber taller than he is since he learned to walk and has a penchant for the unyielding, unmerciful and very violent application of the norms of divine justice –”
Nie Mingjue’s presence bolstered the spirit of good men, while his gaze seemed to make evildoers itch. He was the most earnestly good person Nie Zonghui had ever met, and also one of the most stiff and unbending in respect to what he believed should and should not be done.
Unfortunate that his standards didn’t seem to match up to the needs of either human law or diplomacy…
“– as well as another who can scheme circles around anyone and persuade them of anything as long as he puts his mind to it and only doesn’t because he’s too busy lazing around in the sun to bother –”
Nie Huaisang liked to file his nails down to something that looked quite normal, but they grew sharp quickly enough if he wasn’t paying attention, and he had a penchant for pranks. There was nothing quite as unnerving as running into a sudden and unexpected ambush and then suddenly hearing the shrill peal of a fox’s laughter, hidden behind a scholarly fan.
“– but all things considered, we’d really rather you - didn’t.”
His mother and father nodded fervently.
“Good,” the sect leader said, though he still looked suspiciously at them as if he thought they were hiding something. “Good. As long as we’re agreed.”
-
Nie Zonghui walked in on his sect leader pinning the Wen sect leader to a wall, murmuring something in a low voice with a very particular smile on his face, and then he turned around and walked right back out again.
The sect leader of the Wen sect might appear beautiful and young, but he was at least a generation older than the Nie sect leader. Not that that had stopped the latter from relying on their respective positions to refer to him in startlingly intimate terms – my dear A-Han, the sect leader would say with a touch of wickedness that reminded one of his second son and the tiger gall bravery of his first – and while at first the Wen sect leader had taken it as a challenge to his authority, an act of brash insolence, it appeared that they had progressed beyond that.
That the Wen sect leader already had three wives and two concubines apparently didn’t present any obstacles either – except perhaps in what those poor women might have to endure from their husband when he returned from the wretched teasing he was enduring. Nie Zonghui felt a bit of pity for them.
Shortly thereafter, he felt a bit of pity for himself. The Wen sect had long dreamed of dominating the cultivation world and sought to increase their influence with the other sects through underhanded means, with the Nie sect opposing them at every turn. Even if war was not on the immediate horizon, the wise could smell its distant approach in the air - the best estimates said that it would take another decade or two to arrive, unless the Nie sect leader took an especially hard stance.
It appeared, however, that the Nie sect leader had chosen to take a different sort of…hard stance.
Ugh.
Maybe Nie Zonghui could conspire to throw his sect leader into a cage with a live tiger in heat next time he felt in the mood. It’d probably be less dangerous.
Nie Zonghui had assumed that the first person to talk to him about what he had seen would be his sect leader, even if it was only to remind him of the general rule that the sect leader had ultimate power and therefore could exercise his own bad judgment in deciding to fuck whoever he wished, but instead it was the Wen sect leader that found him later that afternoon.
A flush had yet to fully fade from his cheeks, and Nie Zonghui raised his eyes to the ceiling to avoid looking directly at the man in front of him. 
He did not want to know. Others might, given that no one had ever complained about the looks of either party, but he himself had realized long ago that he had no interest in matters of the flesh under any circumstances; he was very content with that conclusion.
“Is there some service this one can provide to Sect Leader Wen?” he asked politely, and it was only when the sect leader flushed again that he realized belatedly that his words could be misconstrued. After all, his own sect leader had probably already made a similar offer regarding the provision of services…
“Your sect leader has a sister, doesn’t he?” the other man asked, his voice tight and his hands in even tighter fists. “I’m not misremembering that?”
“He does,” Nie Zonghui responded honestly, and not without sympathy for the Wen sect leader’s position. He was given to understand that making certain belated discoveries regarding one’s own preferences could be highly disconcerting, particularly later in life. “But she’s rather different in kind than what you may be thinking, so it won’t work out that way. It wouldn’t work even if she wasn’t already married, which she is.”
After a moment of thought, he added, “Also, consider your predecessors.”
The Wen sect leader’s eyes narrowed.
-
Really, it was the sect leader’s own damn fault that he got himself murdered.
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canary3d-obsessed · 4 years
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Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 07 part one
(Masterpost)
Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!
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Clan Sanren
Lanny Granny gets a second wind and continues her Yin Iron Webinar.
Wei Wuxian explains that although he was adopted by the Jiang Clan, Baoshan Sanren is his grandmaster, via his mom. Lan Yi claims to think that this is pretty great.
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Lan Yi: Wow, amazing, my ex girlfriend who I dumped has settled down and started her own family Clan now, that’s so great. I’m so happy for her. So happy. So great. I mean, when I left I didn’t really picture her finding happiness first, you know? I kind of expected to have settled down myself by now but it’s hard to date when you’re trapped in an ice cave putting headbands on rabbits for 100 years. But it’s fine! I love my life and I’m sure eventually I’ll find that special rabbit person.  Anyway I’m just...SUPER happy for Baoshan. Really. Really happy. For Baoshan. 
Lan Wangji also appears to have thoughts about it, because he reacts pretty intently.
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 Lan+Sanren 4EvR. 
Wang Yibo is looking extra fine in this cave sequence, with no headband to distract from his fierce eyebrows.  
Lan Wangji asks Lan Yi if she’s the one who pulled them into the cave, and she says nope, and then nobody ever explains how they ended up in the cave. “Perhaps it’s destiny” does not count as an explanation. 
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Lan Gran explains that her battery is running down. The Lan bunnies are not energizer bunnies, apparently. She also tells them that it’s impossible to destroy the Yin Iron and that the only solution is to put it back in the cave and try to suppress it again. 
(more after the cut)
However by Episode 23 it inexplicably becomes super easy to destroy the Yin Iron...
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...meaning Lan Yi spent 100 years in a cave for nothing, other than writing the Definitive Guide to Rabbit Headbands. 
Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji get back into Hardy Boys cultivator mode, but this time with an extremely long held gaze, which I think is their first time doing this.
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I mean...even if these boys are 100% neurotypical (and hello, they are not), this is a LOT of eye contact. I can't gaze that long at anything except my phone screen. 
We Will Achieve The Thing Together
Narrator: they will not achieve the thing
The reason I got into c-drama in the first place is, after decades of western storytelling tropes, it’s so refreshing to watch a story and have literally no idea what’s going to happen. Even when the story sets things up to happen a certain way according to my learned experience of stories, it just doesn’t play out that way. For example, if you’re watching The Lost Tomb Reboot and you expected the jade-mining sequence to end with a slave uprising, you were as surprised as I was. 
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Here Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian promise to do their best to find and suppress the Yin iron. Lan Wangji is going to fail at this, allowing this here piece to fall into the hands of the Wens, because unlike his uncle he's not willing to let his clan die to protect it.  
Wei Wuxian is going to take his not-doing-the-thing several steps further, finding and refining his very own piece of extra-badass Yin iron. Yes, he has reasons for this and a lot of stuff happens along the way, but in terms of your typical quest storyline, it would be as if Frodo figured out how to use the one ring to kick Sauron’s ass, rather than (with help) destroying it. Again: this is why I LIKE c-drama. 
Lan Wangji tries to shut Wei Wuxian out of his quest and Wei Wuxian makes a short but utterly character-defining speech. 
You can’t stop me
I know what’s right. 
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And then he says that his Grandmaster Baoshan Sanren was isolated because of the Yin Iron, and he has a responsibility to her. Lan Yi agrees. So...he just kinda quit the Jiang Clan right there, didn’t he? In favor of eventually becoming a wandering cultivator like his Grandmaster and clan uncle (Xiao Xichen), and like his mother. 
He is also going to follow in his father’s footsteps by upsetting his Clan Leader when he falls in love. Gosh, he also, like his parents, will die and leave an orphan to fend for himself. So -- the apple doesn't fall far from the tree I guess.
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He doesn't realize the pickle he’s getting himself into, of course. Being Wei Wuxian, he thinks he can balance all of his increasing obligations, but being human, he won’t be able to. 
Pardon Our Entwinement
Lan Yi leaves to catch the spiritual plane, the Yin iron drops, the ward breaks, and Wen Ning appears to download a new software update. The kind that breaks your video driver and photoshops your eyeballs.  
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Wen Qing comes nosing around the cave wall, and Jiang Cheng stops by to ask what she’s up to. 
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He hopes she’s trying to find his brother, just like he will fail to do for her & her brother one day.  
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The boys fall out of the wall together, in a nice example of the “oops I’m accidentally humping you” c-drama romance trope. To keep it censor-friendly, Wei Wuxian is actually on the ground next to Lan Wangji’s right knee but the shot is framed so that at a glance he appears to be in a much cozier position. 
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Lan Wangji goes on an expression journey don’t say facial through several “oh shit we’re caught” faces, while Wei Wuxian shows Lan Wangji a few iterations of his oh-face. 
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Jiang Cheng wants to know what the fuck they have been getting up to for a day and a night. 
The movie wasn't so hot, it didn't have much of a plot, we fell asleep our goose is cooked our reputation is shot
Wen Qing detects that they were somewhere cold and decides it’s her turn to ask nosy questions. Lan Wangji does the guilty startle thing. 
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Fortunately Wei Wuxian doesn’t have that problem.
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He turns his answer into a prolonged whine about how cold it was, how lost they were, etc. This annoys Jiang Cheng into dropping it and saying they should head back. 
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I’m awesome right? so awesome right?
Wei Wuxian gives Lan Wangji a significant look to show that he’s deploying a rhetorical strategy on purpose to distract his questioner. Lan Wangji super does not know how to do that. 
Flute + Yin Iron = Profit
Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji get to watch as Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen tame the hunk of iron and stick it in the bag of holding. Wei Wuxian pays verrrryyy careful attention to this whole “use a flute to control the Yin iron” lesson. 
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Lan Xichen really should reconsider his music-lessons side hustle. Arguably this one doesn’t turn out as badly for him personally as teaching guqin to Jin Guangyao does, but it doesn’t turn out great, either. 
知己啊  - zhi-ji-ah
This mostly-tedious Yin Iron conversation with the elders includes a super-important WangXian moment.
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Wei Wuxian calls Lan Wangji his zhiji. This is the same word he will use later in the “what am I to you?” conversation during the Jin night hunt, and the word Lan Xichen will use when saying why Lan Wangji wouldn’t repudiate him during his forced isolation. As always, for the full meaning of this word, @hunxi-guilai​ is brills.
A Wen spy bird shows up, and Lan Wangji really wants to chase it, but Lan Xichen says no. 
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This happens a lot, actually. Lan Wangji is not a cool-headed person, despite appearances.  Likewise the boys want to go searching for the Yin Iron and the adults want them to slow their roll. 
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Being a teenager is frustrating, particularly with a classic “I didn’t actually listen to you before making a decision” adult like Lan Qiren in charge. 
Lying is my First Class Spiritual Tool
Nie Huasang shows up and has his usual hilariously varied reaction to Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji - an enthusiastic “Wei-Xiong!” followed by a nervous & meek “Lan Er Gongzi” and a bow to Lan Wangji.  
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He wants to know what happened and Wei Wuxian once again shows his powers of rhetoric. 
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I like to call it my “devil snake.” 
He puts off all of Nie Huaisang’s potential questions by really knowing his questioner well and completely distracting him.  
This time Lan Wangji seems impressed. 
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Jelly Jiang Cheng
Young Master Cockblock shows up and lets loose with a display of total naked jealousy. That carving on Wei Wuxian’s bed back in Lotus Pier...is that him and Jiang Cheng? Because damn, this boi is jealous. 
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...and so is Lan Wangji, apparently, or at least he’s disappointed to have Wei Wuxian taken away from him like that.  
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Yearn Mode Enabled
Club Ruohan’s Foyer
Wen Chao and Xue Yang stand awkwardly in Wen Ruohan’s vestibule talking to the boss through a giant door, because sure, why not. 
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This doesn’t bother Xue Yang, who as usual has no fucks to give. Except that today, Wen Ruohan tells him that the budget for his project finally got approved, which lifts his spirits quite a bit. 
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His project to single-handedly slaughter an entire clan, and he is super excited about the kickoff meeting. 
Wen Chao is mopey because his brother gets all the good murder assignments and his dad doesn’t appreciate him. Boo fucking hoo. 
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Periodic reminder that He Peng looks like this when he’s not playing Wen Chao.
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Part 2 coming soon!
Soundtrack: Wake Up, Little Susie by the Everly Brothers
Bonus
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satanic-fruitcake · 3 years
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I was tagged by @yukichouji, thank you!! I honestly considered not doing this cos it was a lot of writing, but then I thought about his answers and felt the self indulgent need to put them out into the world :D
Note: the parts in brackets are supposed to be read as if they were written by the gossipy Orlaisian journalist doing the interview
So, without further ado,
Interview with Xavier Lavellan
(Below)
- Can you introduce yourself? - if I say no, will I be set on fire? (The Herald let’s put a Short, seemingly forced laugh) I digress, I’m Zav. Full name Xavier Lavellan, of the Lavellan clan, as the surname might entail. I’m also the Inquisitor. Hoorah.
- what’s your gender identity, sexual orientation and relationship status? - (he squints, silently scalding me for the gal of asking such a thing.) I’m sure everyone’s just dying to know so I’ll spill the beans. I’m not single. As for the other two... wouldn’t you like to know? (Scandalous!)
- where and when were you born? - in the Free Marches, 24 years ago.
- what is your weapon of choice and fighting style? Daggers are my best friend. I was never naturally gifted with the art of archery, like Elven stereotypes would have you believe. (A brief pause followed by whispered confession) my hands were too shaky.
- Lastly, are you happy? - (he tenses all over, visibly irked by the question) there’s a gaping hole leaking demons and shit all over Thedas, innocent people are dying over a stupid war, and I’m so “vital” I wasn’t aloud to attend the funeral of some of my clan when they were slaughtered a few months ago. I’m delighted. (Sarcasm. The Inquisitor and I agree now would be a good time to take a short break off the record)
FAMILY AND FRIENDS
- what’s your family like? What is your relationship with them? - they’re alive, well as far as I know. having a country between us is... something? (He shrugs and opens and closes his mouth a few times, but doesn’t say anything for a while) best leave it there for now. I’ve made many lasting friendships with the inquisition though!
- have you ever ran away from home? - (he throws his head back and cackles) where would I run to? Deeper into the woods? ALONE?! or perhaps into a Shem village where I would be chased away with pitchforks? No, I’ve never ran away.
- would you consider marriage or having kids? - Gods, no! I’m too immature and selfish for parenthood. But at least I’m self aware, right? As for marriage... who knows. Maybe I’ll change my mind someday, like every adult has been telling me my whole life. Not anytime soon, though. Not while the whole worlds burning, that’s for sure.
- do you secretly hate one of you friends? - no? Hate is a strong word. And more than that, a strong emotion, if I feel it, you’d know. I’m bad at being subtle. (He chuckles, somewhat darkly)
- which friend knows everything about you? - I could say something heartwarming about my very best friend, but why lie? Leliana, former Left Hand of the Divine, knows everything about me. She is a Spymaster after all. Wait, was I not supposed to say that?
ASKED BY FANS
- are you literate? - (He glares at me, a silent “are you fucking kidding me?!” Evident in his soft elven features. His one word answer is a stern one) yes.
-the eeriest prediction you made that later came true? - I’m not a witch, darling. (He shuffles in his seat, visibly struggling to relax after the last question. His tone softens when he next speaks) I’m actually pretty bad at that kind of thing.
- what is something you were embarrassingly late to realise? - (he lights up at the question, cracking a genuine and excited smile) just how MASSIVE dragons are! I’d never seen one before, they’re so majestic. And destructive.
- do you have any mental health or physical issues? You have seen the magical mark on my hand, yes? Does that count? (The inquisitor thinks I didn’t notice how he skipped the mental health part of the question. I decide it’s best to let it slide)
- what is your current main goal? - defeat the bad guy, restore order, maybe even bring enough peace for my true goal, which is happiness.
CHOICES
- drink or food? - I’m preeeeetty sure you need both, my darling. I don’t know, they’re both good? Such an odd question!
- cats or dogs? - the true question is, why isn’t nugs an option? (He smirks. Cheeky bastard, thinks he’s clever for answering my question with another question!)
- early bird or night owl? Early bird, I’ve always been a morning person, apparently it’s annoying!
- optimist or pessimist? - when you go through the things I have and walk out alive, it’s difficult to be pessimistic. Optimism keeps me going, for now.
HAVE YOU EVER
- been caught sneaking out? - no. Plus side of having parents who don’t pay you much attention, I suppose. You can come and go as you please! (He chuckles, probably hoping I won’t notice how sad that is)
- broken a bone? - twice. (Cocky smirk) I’m careful.
- received flowers? - (he pauses, surprised, then proceeds to gesture at himself as he answers) of course. you have seen me, haven’t you?
- ghosted someone? - (his tone becomes serious again) yes, once. I regret it. I was a stupid kid and she was so nice but oh so boring! I realise now I should’ve just been honest. (He covered his mouth in embarrassment)
- pretended to laugh at a joke you didn’t get? - no, once again, I’m bad pretending.
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tfw-no-tennis · 3 years
Text
animorphssss.....2!
ok one L abt reading the series on my ereader is that the flipbook illustrations arent there ;_; those were my favvvvv
anyways I love animorphs still
I feel like I'll end up repeating myself a lot during these little liveblogs lmao but mannnn it’s so good. its so hardcore. like I know that that’s the whole Thing but I still get shocked by some of the stuff that happens 
like a big theme in the series centers around the morality of killing your enemies - and it’s so all over the place bc in book 6 you have jake boiling a bunch of yeerks alive, which is kinda gnarly if you think abt it, but the alternative would be to leave them there and let them infest people soo...? and that’s basically the point, that there are never any easy choices in war 
also I went on the animorphs wiki to look at trivia bc I love doing that and I cant BELIEVE (some of) the books were reissued in 2011 and they changed/removed some of the references to be more ‘modern’ omfg....talk about erasing 90s culture smh 
likeeee I was born in 97 so I didn't exactly grow up in the 90s and therefore some of the references go over my head but its so charming and fun to have them there! and it makes sense given that the books are SET in the 90s
I don't remember ever being confused by any of the references as a kid (tho for sure a lot of them went over my head), but then again I read the books in like 2008 sooo
also some of the stuff that they change - like changing ‘recorded w/a vcr’ to ‘recorded w/the TV’ or ‘floppy disc’ to ‘flash drive’ may make more sense to modern audiences, but doesn't make sense in the context of the story still being set in the 90s
tho it is funny that the books use the phrase ‘hook up’ to mean ‘meet up’ a lot bc that is a phrase that definitely has a different meaning nowadays
alsooooo as it turns out I'm p sure I only read a couple of the spinoffs - the hork-bajir chronicles and the ellimist chronicles (which was confusing lmao), bc my library didn’t have the others :( 2007/2008 woes....
but now I get to read the spinoffs woooooooo so I read the first megamorphs and the andalite chronicles 
I'm reading them in the chronological order (I think?) which is good bc part of the problem was that I read the ellimist book at a completely weird time and it confused me more lmao
megamorphs 1 basically felt like a regular animorphs book except longer, but the plot didn't feel like it needed all that extra page space tbh? even so it was an entertaining adventure
and rachel having amnesia was great, amnesia is one of my fav tropes lmao. and it was a lot of fun here, though a bit underutilized 
another favorite trope of mine is time travel, so I'm gonna have a really fun time here w/that
as for the andalite chronicles, I really enjoyed that one. I thought it was a well done story about the horrors of war (which is a theme animorphs does excellently), kind of similar to the overarching story of the whole series, but fit into one book without feeling rushed
the way the story starts out with elfangor wanting to be a hero, not understanding what that entails, to the end where he IS going to be a hero, and he knows now that this is a burden rather than a reward 
the horror elements are also really strong, with the taxxon morph being horrifying of course
and mannnn I loved that we got to see more of the taxxons as a species, and see that not all taxxons submitted to the yeerks - which breaks the previous theme of ‘all the taxxons are evil just because’ 
this book also establishes that the taxxons gave themselves over to the yeerks due to their constant hunger being unbearable, so it isn’t just that they’re evil for fun 
animorphs does such an excellent job showing that each ‘side’ of a war will have good and bad (or at least sympathetic and unsympathetic) people 
also loren was awesome, what a cool character. though I didn't realize she was literally like 13 until the very end of the book, holy shit. that's crazy. i thought she was 16 at the youngest....geez. her throwing a rock at visser 3 is even more iconic knowing she's a middle schooler at the time
and chapman was here! I'm assuming this must be the same chapman as the assistant principal controller... I thought it was a little strange to put chapman in that role, bc in this book he was a huge asshole basically the entire time, but in the previous (’future’) book it was revealed that he became a controller willingly only to spare his daughter, which is pretty far from this book where he’s actively trying to sell humanity out to the yeerks...people change I guess? (also he got his memory erased so I guess there's that)
alloran was a really interesting character. horrors of war again - we hear from his old buddy that he used to be a fun, witty guy, but war changed him into somebody who would do horrible things 
and him becoming a controller was horrifying, obviously, but I like that alloran wasn't portrayed as some perfect, holy guy in order to make it all the more tragic when he got infested. its already fucked up enough as it is, and making him flawed was a lot more meaningful 
and him wanting to flush all the yeerks out into space....oooooof the (later) parallels hurt 
plus the fact that elfangor refusing to commit genocide against the helpless yeerks (even though they’re the enemy) directly contributing to alloran becoming a controller.....oof. I love that it shows that even making the morally correct decisions during war can lead to awful things happening, but not in a way that endorses evil actions - the story isn’t saying that elfangor should have killed the yeerks, it’s saying that there are no good choices in war 
arbron being trapped as a taxxon was fucked up. but also really intriguing, especially how he found purpose and led a free taxxon uprising. I don't remember if we hear from him/the free taxxons again but I hope so
also the plot twist of tobias being elfangors SON...bruh. I do remember that despite not having read this book so it must come up in the main story later but my memory of that is vauge so I’m excited to see how that plays out. it’s always gonna be hilarious to me that ax is technically tobias’s uncle 
and then the ellimist drops in and wacks up the time stream even more. classic. I love the crazy time travel stuff in animorphs
omfg and the bits where elfangor is a human tech guy and talked about his friends bill and steve LMAOOOOO
also the scene where elfangor drives the yellow mustang while blasting '(I cant get no) satisfaction’ by the rolling stones was one of the most iconic things I've ever read
basically I loved all the angles of war fucking people up. from loren’s dad, to alloran, to elfangor himself learning about the true horrors of war...v well done imo
ok back to the main series - so my pick for the most fucked up scene SO FAR (in my own personal opinion) - the scene where they're in the jungle and rachel passes out in bear morph and a bunch of rainforest ants start EATING HER ALIVE and like crawling into her ears and mouth and HGGGGGG that was genuinely so fucking disturbing
its a good thing that the time travel made it so rachel couldn't remember that bc that was fuuuuucked
another contender is a scene we don't actually see - erek having his capacity for violence instated and then slaughtering a ton of human and hork-bajir controllers 
like damn, you know its fucked up when its too fucked up for ANIMORPHS to even ‘show.’ this is a series that doesn't pull punches but evidentially that would've been Too Much to actually portray (understandably). also i feel like seeing the aftermath/everyone’s reactions had more of an impact than describing erek killing a bunch of people would have
also I forgot that marco Literally Fucking Dies during that scene and that's why he doesn't get to see the slaughter. wow
and then in the very next book JAKE dies too. jesus
oh it was also so sad and fucked up when marco’s dad told him that he and his wife used to fight sometimes, but then all of a sudden they stopped fighting, and their relationship was basically entirely peaceful and perfect - and this is how marco knows exactly when his mom was made into a controller, bc of course a yeerk wouldn't care enough to get into petty arguments like that....ooooof
Okay and book 15 really got me...that was fucking heavy man. Geeeez. Everything w/Marco and his mom is so fucked uppppp
Like he literally has to deal with so much awful traumatizing shit. The scene where he pretends to be a controller and is face to face w/visser one and THAT HIS MOM but he can’t even do anything, and he just sees the evil in her eyes and thinks about how there’s no way she had been controlled by a yeerk that long before bc he’s never seen her look like that...that was so fucking sad.
Plus Marcos mom now thinking that Marco is a controller...aughh...and then later Marco knows he can’t even think-speak to her bc he’ll just talk about everything he’s wanted to talk about to his mom this whole time... ;_;
And the parts where Marcos humor slips and the utter rage he feels towards the situation comes through...man
Plus everything about him being understandably afraid of sharks after being nearly torn in half by one back during their first dolphin adventure
Augh oh and jake telling Marco that everyone can tell something is up bc Marco isn’t joking around and talking about how insane their plan is like usual, so Marco fakes it sand does all that even tho he’s terrified and conflicted...aughhhh
Ok and the last scene where Marco is thinking about a future where he and his parents can talk plainly about how awful and traumatizing everything is, and then eventually they’ll feel okay enough to joke about it, bc Marcos mom is the one who taught him to look at the funny side of life...Oh The Pain
There were a lot of great fucked up individual lines in this book too. I’m just so sad about these poor middle schoolers jfc
Also I do distinctly remember the scene where they collapse the shark tank at Ocean World or w/e, it was weird af reading it bc I remembered none of the rest of the book but got weird deja vu reading that scene and remembering having read it like 13+ years ago
if it’s not clear by now I have a pretty terrible memory for media which is honestly good bc then I can reread things and it’s like new
Also jake...man...I said it previously but I was kinda eh about jake when I first read these bc he’s kinda the ‘basic’ character, but now I find his story much more interesting
His conflict over being leader is really good. KAA does a fantastic job capturing the pressure he’s under bc he was chosen by his friends to be the leader, so he REALLY can’t back out, and he doesn’t necessarily feel up to it, but feels he has no choice in the matter...
And constantly having to make really difficult decisions that could get his friends killed...geez. It’s so much pressure. And he talks about wanting to go back to being a normal kid when this is all over, and it kinda strikes me as him being in denial - like, there’s no way things can ever be ‘normal’ again, but that’s his way of coping.
Especially with Tom and all that. That conflict is so compelling...jake having to play all these different roles - as leader, as a son/student, as a regular brother to Tom - he’s constantly having to act a certain way and rarely gets to be Himself
It’s actually kinda relatable in a way - that feeling of being In Charge, but in a somewhat abstract and informal way, so you feel like regular old you, but you have to carefully regulate how you act bc the people around you expect a certain standard of behavior from you...
And all the morally grey situations they’re put in are fucked up, but especially for jake who has the final say on what they do, even when knowing it could lead to his friends being killed or made into controllers
Like in the book with the cannibal yeerk guy - there’s basically no good choices there. Jake lets the cannibal live, and (at first) implies that it’s for the best that he’s cannibalizing other yeerks and therefore helping get rid of some yeerks - except that he kills their hosts too
but the alternative would be to directly kill another human being who isn't actively fighting/resisting you, which is a fucked up thing for a middle schooler to have to do 
And the conflict between jake and Cassie is really excellent bc jake has to make these awful decisions, and Cassie is the type of person who can’t stand that sort of thing, so it gets left up to jake a lot, but then she’s upset with jake for doing something awful, even while knowing that there were no better options
like, her asking jake to kill the cannibal guy for her was really fucked up, but also entirely understandable for cassie as a character to ask. it was an emotionally charged situation, and cassie is an emotional person. she’s also somebody who like to Act, to do concrete good, and getting rid of an Evil Bad Guy in front of her would be a definite action
But Cassie is a great source of morality to the group - most of them are pretty jaded, but Cassie is able to hope in a way none of the rest are. It creates a really compelling dynamic between jake and Cassie that I kinda dismissed when I was like 10 or w/e
Also the scene where jake as a fly gets crushed and starts dying? Seriously fucked. And then after when he’s nearly breaking down in the airport and Cassie comforts him...that was a really good scene. Cassie is so good  
And the continuity is so excellent - I love how in book 17, Cassie (and jake to an extent) doesn’t really weigh in on the moral debate abt the oatmeal bc she’s still shaken up by asking jake to murder a guy for her, and then (presumably) going ahead and lighting his house on fire when jake doesn’t kill him
And augh jake and Marco have such a good and interesting dynamic - the entire group kinda pushes each other into their respective ‘roles’ in the group, but for a few books that’s really true for jake and marco
I don't remember what book it was but at some point marco (I think) mentions that jake understands what marco is dealing with w/his mom being a controller bc of tom, but that they don’t talk about it bc they ‘don't talk about stuff like that’ or something and I'm just like noooo talk to each other :( 
but at this point jake feels like he can’t really express doubt and fear and stuff like that bc he’s the Leader and they look to him to be strong (which is ironically very similar to how rachel feels), and marco feels like he can’t be serious bc he’s the funny guy. 
Basically I love all the different dynamics in the group. How Cassie and Rachel are such opposites but are best friends and get along well, while Marco and Cassie are more directly opposed - as jake says, Marco is ruthless, and Cassie definitely isn’t. Rachel and Marco are also pretty different which is interesting, bc they have a lot in common, and actually agree on a lot (even if they disagree out loud) but their commonalities combined with their circumstances make them react very differently to the same situations
I also love seeing the differences between characters from each other’s POV - like, p much all the characters think that Rachel is completely fearless, but when the book is from her POV, we get to see that that isn’t true at all - she feels plenty of fear, but she recognizes that her role in the group is to be the fearless one, so she pushes aside her fear to fit into that role (which inadvertently pushes her more and more into that ‘fearless warrior’ box - something that happens to all the characters more and more as the story goes on, like jake as ‘the leader’ and Marco as ‘the jokester’).
Also I loooove the grey morality of literally everything. Like the book where ax discovers an andalite traitor - not a controller, just an andalite who betrayed them to the yeerks. This leads to the deaths of like a hundred other andalites, and that whole scene you really just feel for ax, bc he feels so awful about everyone else dying while he escapes, yet he’s also so grateful to be alive, which he in turn feels bad about...
And ax’s conflict about being torn between his home w/his fellow andalites and his new home on earth w/his friends is great
And oh man I fucking love book 19. Any of the books where it goes more into the yeerks and their side of things are so good, just like the book where jake was made into a controller.
And book 19, where we meet a sympathetic yeerk, comes right after 18, where we meet an andalite traitor - again, I love how we clearly see that no one side is completely good or completely bad
So yeah book 19 fucking slapped. That shit was so compelling. I love how Cassie made a bunch of foolish decisions based on naïve hope, but it worked out!! Things aren’t always bleak and awful!
Except there were plenty bleak and awful parts of this book. It had a great balance of moods tbh, even though a lot of the situations were extremely contrived lmao. I love the stuff that aftran says, which is basically what I was thinking when I started my reread - being a yeerk fucking sucks, you’re literally a blind slug but also completely and fully sentient, on the same level as humans and andalites - and as afran pointed out this book, the yeerks are born as parasites, just as humans are born as predators - why is it okay for the humans to kill countless animals to eat, but not for the yeerks to enslave races to act as hosts? Well, the situation isn’t totally comparable, which Cassie and Marco both point out when aftran makes that comparison - the yeerks are enslaving sentient species, and cows and chickens are not the same as the humans and hork-bajir (though the story understandably doesn’t fall too deeply into the ‘who deserves what right/animal sentience’ rabbit hole).
And I like that aftran points out that the yeerks basically have 2 options currently - stay helpless and blind in a yeerk pool, or enslave a host. It’s interesting to hear that a lot of yeerks don’t like doing this but see it as the only options, as opposed to complete sensory deprivation. It makes me wonder if there are yeerks who are so staunchly against it that they elect to stay as pool-bound slugs forever
Also maybe it’s the shounen anime fan in me but I don’t even care that much that Cassie’s entire plan was completely off the rails and hinged on only the slightest chance of success - with failure being much more likely and completely catastrophic, with the animorphs and their loved ones all being wiped out, vs success being unlikely and also achieving...a moral victory? Peace between two enemy combatants in a huge war? nothing all that concrete...anyways it was a bunch of good-faith horrible decisions on Cassie’s part, but I don’t even care? I love stories where hope and love save the day against all odds, especially when they’re wielded like weapons by a character and make everything end nicely
This is especially true here bc animorphs is generally a series that leans very far away from that type of thing, so when it does happen, it feels like a victory. Plus the David trilogy is next so we kinda need a happy ending while we can
also bc I compared animorphs to hxh last time, I now have to compare it to the other series I've (partially) liveblogged, transformers mtmte.
this is gonna be more abstract and brief but basically. mtmte is all about after the war, and everyone has so much trauma and everything just sucks, so they all go on a space cruise and work on themselves. basically.
but the series does a lot of exploration of how war fucks people up - same as animorphs, tho animorphs spans the beginning of the war (for the main characters at least) until the end, whereas mtmte starts when the war ends.
but the point is. both series do an excellent job showcasing the wide range of reactions people have to being put in unthinkable situations during wartime. all the major characters in mtmte go through arcs where they heal/change from the war, some more subtle than others
basically the animorphs needs to go on a wacky space cruise adventure with a bunch of other fucked up people and figure their shit out, mtmte style
ok this is wicked long already so I’m gonna end it here. also I feel like I should start the next liveblog w/the david triology bc I’m for sure gonna have a lot to say abt that
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dilly-oh · 4 years
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Three Strikes
    “Listen up, team,” Captain Yamato says, his face deathly serious, “we are going to murder these guys. They are going to be sent home in body-bags. They’re the enemy, and we’re gonna slaughter them.”
    Kakashi glances over at the other team. They look like a bunch of sweaty highschool kids, same as them, though their baseball uniforms look like they’ve seen better days. Or months. Two messy brown-haired boys are passing around a joint, a douchey-looking kid with silver hair is blatantly screwing around on his phone, and another is straight up sleeping on the bench. Their Captain is facing them, hands on his hips as he tries to rouse his teammates, ponytail bouncing at the effort. It seems a lost cause, just like their chances of winning.
    “Even their parents aren’t going to be able to identify their remains.”
    Yamato’s doing that thing again where he gets too serious and starts creeping everyone out. Kakashi looks over at Coach Minato to see if he’s going to put a stop to this, but he’s too busy giggling and sexting his wife to notice. As usual.
    “Kakashi, we’re counting on your pitches to really massacre them, got it?” Yamato fixes him with that soul-killing stare, all blank and dead-eyed.
    “Mmm,” Kakashi hums noncommittally, his lower face hidden behind his catcher’s mitt. He finds the smell comforting. Also, Asuma is sitting next to him, and reeks of a nauseating combination of B.O., cigarette smoke and Kurenai’s perfume. As if they’re fooling anyone by claiming to be ‘just friends’. 
    “Can we hurry this up?” Genma cuts in, snapping his gum. “I have a hot date in, like, two hours.” 
    “I’m sitting right here,” Raido states. “You’re so fucking embarrassing.”
    “Love you too, babe.”
    “Where the hell is Gai?” Asuma asks, glancing around.
    “He ate too many protein bars again. He’s in the can.”
    Kakashi can’t wait for this to be over so he can go home and chill with the dogs. All eight of them. He makes a mental reminder to pick up some more Milkbones on the way home. 
    The thing is, Kakashi is damn good at baseball, even though he loathes it. He’d drop it in a heartbeat and spend all his free time playing CoD, except his father insists he play a sport to ‘round out his resume’. As if his straight A’s since Kindergarten and 160 IQ wasn’t enough. Kakashi’s pitches are precise, powerful, and virtually unstoppable. The ball almost seems to move as if he controls it himself. He strikes everyone out with 99.9% accuracy, able to analyze an opponent in a single glance and determine their weaknesses. It’s the reason their team has made it so far, despite his teammate’s determined efforts to goof off. 
    The two coaches finally get their shit together and shake hands (the other coach is an elderly man who winks at Asuma for some reason, who groans). The game begins, and Kakashi takes his place on the pitcher’s mound, rolling the ball soothingly around in his hand. The other team’s Captain is up first. After adjusting his ponytail under his helmet, he walks to the plate, taps the ground with his bat, and looks up at Kakashi just as he winds up to throw.
    He’s a nerdy looking kid with gangly arms, a scar over the bridge of his nose, and a determined scowl on his face. 
    He’s the most gorgeous thing Kakashi’s ever seen. 
    The ball slips off his fingers, goes spinning off in a corkscrew, and clocks a drink right out of a bystander’s hand. Soda sprays everywhere, thoroughly coating a good portion of the meager crowd. 
    “Foul!” the umpire cries. The boy blinks in surprise, then squares up again, bat waving tauntingly. Kakashi gets another ball and winds up.
    This time his ball hits a car in the parking lot, the burglar alarm wailing away. The car’s owner wails even louder.
    “Foul!” 
    Kakashi throws another foul. And another. 
    “Ball!”
    The boy walks. He glances at Kakashi as he trots by him, confused. Kakashi keeps his eyes on the ground, cursing inwardly.
    This will not happen again.
    It happens again.
    And again.
    And again. 
    It’s not so bad when the boy’s on second base, because then he’s directly behind Kakashi and out of his line of sight. But when he’s on first or third, he can see him out of the corner of his eye, and his gaze is naturally drawn to him, concentration wavering. It’s even worse when he’s on the bench, because then Kakashi can see him in his natural state, smiling and chatting amicably with his teammates. 
    But nothing compares to when he’s up to the plate, standing ready for the pitch. The intensity of those deep brown eyes is staggering, making his legs weak. He walks each time, Kakashi’s near-perfect pitches always spinning out of control and destroying something of value. He’s just glad he’s hit mostly inanimate objects and not people. 
    After several innings of this, Captain Yamato has had enough, and he calls a time-out, dragging Kakashi to the side of the dugout for a polite chat. 
    “Kakashi, the fuck is going on? You’re throwing the damn game! Literally!”
    “I’m sorry,” Kakashi mumbles, miserable. “I...I don’t know-”
    “Are you feeling alright?” Captain Minato has decided to finally do his job and actually act like a Coach, walking over to join them.
    “M’fine.” Kakashi shakes his head, hiding his face behind his glove. “It’s just...I keep getting...distracted.” Yamato sputters indignantly, but Minato’s studying him, a thoughtful look on his face. He glances over at the other team, and Kakashi’s traitorous eyes follow, latching onto the boy, who is busy scolding his teammates again, cheeks flushed with frustration. Kakashi’s ears start to burn. Minato chuckles and he hurriedly snaps his gaze back.
   “...I think I see what the problem is.” He pats Kakashi’s shoulder with a knowing grin. “Listen, Kakashi...why don’t you sit this one out? Just...relax and enjoy the view.”
    It feels like Kakashi’s ears are going to burn down to nubs.
    “What?! He can’t sit out, we need him! How else are we going to bathe in their blood?”
    “Bathe in their- what? Christ, Yamato, it’s just a game. Calm down. Are we going to have to have another talk?”
    Kakashi drags his feet back to the bench and plonks himself down. The others glance over at him in concern. 
    “What’s up, Kakashi?” Genma asks. “Constipated?”
    “Gai, give him some of your protein bars.” Raido elbows the other boy in the gut, who groans. 
    Nevermind, they’re just idiots. Kakashi cowers behind his mitt in shame. 
    The game continues, and his teammates manage to do remarkably well without him. Gai makes a surprisingly good substitute pitcher, although he screams “Dynamic Pitch!!” every time he throws the ball until Coach Minato tells him to cut it out. Asuma is jacked enough that he can hit a home-run every time he connects, and Kakashi is pretty sure the other team is terrified of Yamato and his intimidating stare. The game makes a quick turnaround, and in the blink of an eye, they’ve won. He’s been staring nonstop at the boy, too, so that might have something to do with the quick win. 
    Everyone cheers and high-fives while Kakashi quickly grabs his stuff, shoves it in his duffle, and scuttles off towards the bus. Coach Minato is suddenly next to him, blocking his way. 
    “Why don’t you go say hi?” he suggests, nodding his head at the other team.
    Kakashi can’t think of anything more horrible.
    “This was an away game,” Minato reminds him. “You might never see him again.”
    ...Dammit. 
    Dropping his bag in the dirt, Kakashi forces himself to turn around and walk robotically towards the boy, who is just wrapping up a speech to his teammates about how they’re still winners for doing their best, but no-one’s really listening. He turns away from them, shaking his head in exasperation, and blinks in surprise as Kakashi stops in front of him. He’s even cuter up close. Kakashi keeps his eyes on the ground to keep from being blinded. 
    “...Hi.”
    “Uh. Hey.” The boy regards him warily. “You alright out there? The Coach made you sit down.”
    “Oh, yeah. I’m fine.” Kakashi pauses long enough for the silence to turn painfully awkward. “I’m Kakashi, by the way.” 
    “Iruka.” God, even his name is cute. Kakashi scrambles to think of something to talk about. 
    “So, um. Do you...like baseball?”
    “Not really, no,” Iruka answers. “I’d rather be home playing CoD, to tell the truth.”
    “Oh my God, me too,” Kakashi slumps over, awash with relief. “Have you seen the latest updates? They have a new map that-”
    The next five minutes are incomprehensible gibberish to everyone but them as they debate the best maps, guns, and loadouts.
    “Iruka, let’s go!” a voice calls impatiently from the parking lot. 
    “Yeah, yeah, just a minute,” he calls back, waving at his teammates. Kakashi’s stomach tightens. 
    This is it. His last chance. 
    “Hey, uh...” He takes a deep breath. “You wanna...hang out sometime?” 
    Iruka stares back at him blankly. 
    “I live, like, twenty miles away from you.”
    “Oh.” Kakashi blinks. “Right. Sorry.” He feels like a complete idiot. Here he was, thinking he actually had a chance-
    “Here’s my phone number. Message me so I can friend you and we’ll play later.”
    ...Then again, maybe he did.
    They exchange numbers, Kakashi happily adding a dolphin emoji after Iruka’s name. 
    “So is this a friend thing, or a boyfriend thing?” Iruka asks, blunt as can be. Kakashi just gapes at him, wide-eyed in horror. His face feels like it’s on fire, and he desperately wishes he’d brought his glove to hide behind.
    “...Only...if you want it to be,” he croaks out. Iruka stares at him a beat longer, then breaks out into a blinding grin. 
    “Yeah, sure, why not. You were pretty cute out there, spazzing out every time I was up to bat. I’m surprised you didn’t hit a bird.”
    Oh my God. He knew. Oh my GOD. 
    “I have to warn you, though...” Iruka went on, grinning cheekily, “three strikes, and you’re out.”
    Kakashi has never been more in love.
(Written for @kakairu-fest, Week 1 Prompt: Summer Sports)
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ksbwnotes · 3 years
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Chapter 8, Part 3
*leaning back in chair from exhaustion* my brain needs to learn how to shut up sometimes.
1. *tilts head to the side* Hmn.
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Not that Sangwoo is intentionally lying here, I think he genuinely feels this is the best answer he can come up with. Because it’s better to covet nothing and be given nothing, then covet something only to be given nothing. 
There was this Thor thing before, with his sister Angela, belonging to a race of angels (and i loooooove their rendition of angels because anything that subverts the original, purer narrative is my jam and butter): “Nothing for nothing.”  The Angels in that comic will only do things if they are given payment in exchange for doing so. Odin is considered “The King of Nothing” because he once expected them to do the right thing (saving humans, I think?) just for the sake of it, rather than for material gain. This was an insult to the Angels, pretty much equating this to Odin seeing them as worthless. Thus, if you give nothing, you get nothing.
Sangwoo grew up having to deal with “Nothing for something”. As in, he puts his mom as priority and, in exchange, his mom abuses him.  He behaves himself as much as he can, and in the end, his dad abuses him. He emulates an upstanding citizen to others and, because of that, they love him only for the mask he puts on, deterred from him the moment there is a crack--and this was something that went on looong before he became a sociopath. He is expected to give and give, but get nothing in return.
So now, Sangwoo’s actions are pretty much begging “Something for nothing”.  He wants to be given love and respect even though he knows that he has done nothing to deserve it. Because this hurts less. At least, here, it’s more of a self-fulfilling prophecy rather than the world kicking him while he’s down just because it wants to. At least, this way, Sangwoo can kick back and fool himself into thinking that every kick doesn’t destroy more and more pieces of himself.
2. Extension of prior panel and theory
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Right now, Bum is the only one who has given him “something”. Even if it ends up being “nothing”, there is “something” to accompany that oblivion. This, in a way, is a reflection of the Lima syndrome Sangwoo is experiencing while Bum is experiencing Stockholm at the same time (though, he experienced the beginnings of it much earlier than Sangwoo). 
For Bum, Sangwoo will treat him kindly, but then do shit like...throw him against a car. Threaten to cut him up. Hang him by a pulley. All that jazz. But then, later on, Sangwoo will treat him nicely again and intersperse the abuse with little rewards he dangles in front of Bum like a master training their dog with snacks. 
For Sangwoo, Bum will give him a sense of humanity that Sangwoo probably hasn’t felt in...like 4 years. But obviously, Bum won’t be able to commit to this because Sangwoo is his abuser, so the times Bum treats him lovingly is an extension of his response to Sangwoo’s abuse. Like a frog that will end up staying in the boiling pot that will then be cooked alive then given as sustenance to its slaughterer. 
Sangwoo doesn’t know how healthy relationships work, that it’s not “nothing for nothing” or any of it’s variations, but actually “something for something”. All relationships are meant to be an equal give and take, but that requires work and being able to work through pain in a positive way, instead of falling straight into despair. 
So, Sangwoo is trapping both himself and Bum in a cyclical relationship where Bum gives him “something for nothing” and Sangwoo is now in the position of power that his parents put him in--the “nothing for something” position. Eventually though, we’ll see Sangwoo gradually try to give Bum “something” for his efforts, only to realize just how empty he is afterwards. That giving Bum “something” back only makes him feel like he’s still “nothing”. 
3. Wait, how did he kill CEO Daughter girl...
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I looked back and saw the blood on her forehead, so maybe he used the sledgehammer that he hit Bum’s leg with to hit her on the temple or something. Because we don’t see a cut beneath her chin or something. So, again, the ones he loses attachment for just die, but people like Bum...they receive a lot more cuts and bruises I think. More evidence of how much he is trying to make them hate him, proving to him that they were lying when they said they loved him. 
4. Seeing it this way...
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...I think this is more proof of how much Bum has proved the impossible. He has lived so much longer than what should be expected for any of his prey. Again, Sangwoo does not consciously go in planning to kill his victims, but his subconscious is preparing him for it and he knows the drill. It may not be planned, but Sangwoo still expects it. So the fact that Bum is still alive goes against all of Sangwoo’s expectations.
Subconsciously, now, he goes in preparing to keep Bum alive. That cut underneath the chin was probably how Sangwoo killed past victims, the ones who got the closest before Bum arrived. That is probably how he ended them. He slit deep into their throat before they could tighten their grip around his neck.
But Bum has surpassed them, so Sangwoo is giving Bum that scar as a warning to stop what he’s doing so that he doesn’t feel the need to kill Bum. 
Because, now, he’s scared of the regret that will follow once he kills Bum. He’s more scared of the consequence of losing Bum than the consequence of letting Bum further into his life (because, right now, Sangwoo has hope for the future with Bum in it).
5. Ooooh I love the comparison of everyday life and food to Sangwoo’s slicing and dicing of Bum
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This shows just how much Sangwoo’s alive can no longer be normal. 
Like...he can look at that sliced meat and imagine all the bodies he has sliced open. How are you supposed to continue with daily life after having experienced what he has? Then, furthermore, after doing what he has? 
It drives further home to Sangwoo that he is ostracized from humanity as a whole. That no one in this planet can accept him (actually, there’ll be plenty of people who can, but the thing is, that’s not the kind of acceptance Sangwoo wants, or else Bum would’ve been enough for him/he would’ve had a much easier time of finding a fellow sociopath--I do think Sangwoo being a sociopath, not a psychopath, something to do with it, since he’s using killing as a coping mechanism rather than a response/release).
That, in the end, he is only furthering how he will end up dying alone and dying painfully.
6. Heyyyy, Jieun, that you??
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Lol, if that is, then I love how Bum in the next panel drives home their every closer intertwining fates and that she is soon to be dead.
Also, where...is Sangwoo bringing her??  Even with how obedient Bum is, I don’t think Sangwoo would risk bringing her to his house unless she’s going to the basement with Bum...which, again, I don’t think he’d do lol. So...love hotel???
Whether or not that is Jieun, I think this also serves as a representation of Sangwoo questioning his sexuality because he is now genuinely thinking of being with Bum. And Bum is a guy, so does that mean he’s gAyyY?
Also one thing to point out, which probably doesn’t mean anything but still miiiight...here we see Jieun’s blissed out face, which is similar to Sangwoo’s o-face in earlier panels. However, Sangwoo’s face is obscured and we don’t see anything. This could suggest that he doesn’t actually feel that great doing Jieun, showing how he’s unable to have normal sexual relations due to...yeah. 
7. AND NOW, SANGWOO IS AT A FUCKING GAY BAR *WHEEZE*
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Ahhh, Bum. The things you somehow make Sangwoo end up doing. It’s applaud worthy, now that I think about it. Sangwoo obviously, from the beginning of this, wasn’t completely straight. But he’s also not gay either. I personally think, with sexuality being a spectrum rather than a conglomeration of separate categories, being with a guy shouldn’t automatically make something homosexual. If anything, Sangwoo is on the bi or demi spectrum, but he’s feminine-inclined.
But the fact that Sangwoo wants to actually see whether or not he’s gay. x’D  Because, if that’s the case, then that means he can widen his prey circle beyond women and see if he can find someone who can accept him amongst the male population as well. 
So, I think this experience will show Sangwoo that Bum is...special. Like. To a point that it’s ridiculous for him because it’s like his sexuality is this vague hetero-excluding-Bum-sexual. Which will drive home even more for Sangwoo that, for as long as he still thinks a normal life is possible, he needs Bum to stay with him.
8. ....But...why this guy???
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Of all the people for you to choose, Sangwoo, what happened. xD You could literally pick up ANYONE ELSE--look at that slender blue-haired guy in the last panel--and this is the one you end up going for????  
No, seriously, what. What even. 
Oh wait. Criteria. Criteria. Right. Sangwoo has to be careful about who he chooses. If he chooses a worker there and they end up dead, then that can lead back to Sangwoo way too easily. 
He doesn’t go in planning to kill the one he hooks up with, but obviously, he has to prepare for that just in case. Because he knows that they could trigger him at any point in time, so no matter what, his prey has to fit a very very narrow criteria. 
Which makes me think of that CEO daughter girl. I don’t think she can be someone whose father lives there in Korea. The daughter probably just decided to go their as a tourist and Sangwoo picked her up in a bar or club or some other tourist hot spot. That will make things very difficult to find him because it will take a while for her to be realized that she’s missing and by that time, it’ll be too late to track things back to him.  This shows how much he pays attention to his surroundings at any given time, because Sangwoo probably thinks of every little detail to make sure that, even if police do go to that area, he made sure little to no attention would be called to him. 
So this actually don’t really help much in convincing Sangwoo to explore his sexuality lol. Gay people have preferences too, they’re not just gonna go after any gay person. And he already has this oral trauma, so. Even less points to being gay lol. 
Anyways, I can barely think at this point, I should just end it here...
9. ALMOOOOST. DOOOONE.
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Lol I have a feeling that Sangwoo is pissed at Bum because if it wasn’t for Bum, Sangwoo would’ve never gone to that gay bar and experienced the disgusting feeling of blowing another man. 
Because, actually, Sangwoo might have done it. Just so he can convince that guy to go home with him so that he can kill that guy. Which...would just make Sangwoo even all the more pissy. xD
Actually, one thing to note...I think Sungbae later goes to that same gay bar??  To get information or something??  And one of the workers actually gives vague information that point Sangwoo having been there and doing something. Which would be unusually sloppy of Sangwoo. And that’s only because Sangwoo was there due to Bum’s influence--in an entirely new situation that he was uncomfortable with and unable to properly exercise his usual precautions. 
This is a distant call to how, later on, Sangwoo makes more and more mistakes, sloppier than the last, because of how desperately he tries to integrate Bum into his life. 
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“The Rise of Skywalker”- A Review from Memory
So it’s been a week since I’ve had to live with this film in front of my eyes, and a week and a half that I’ve had to grapple with the brunt of its sins. With a heavy sigh, I think I’m ready to go through the play-by-play of every plot hole in this film that I can manage from memory without the thing in front of me. And even then, the laundry list is hefty. Keep in mind that this is a FILM-BASED review only- I have tried to refrain from including new information we have learned since its release last Thursday in an effort to keep this as focused and topical as possible.
+The first scene of this film is weird. I’m all for watching Adam Driver wild out on some dudes, but it is never explained who these guys are and if it’s just Kylo ‘committing more slaughter’ (as the casual audience is wont to think) or if there’s something significant here. As the movie goes on and Kylo makes it clear that he’s under no one’s thumb, *and* that the object he was after was Sith, you start to get an idea that maybe those guys at the intro are No Good, but this is never explained or confirmed. To a casual audience with no interest in additional materials, it just looks like Bad Ole Kylo Doing More Bad Ole Stuff. *sigh*
+Exogol and Palpatine’s hideout looks like the Borg Cube from Star Trek: First Contact from 1996. This really smacked me in the face how similar it was.
+Snoke’s significance getting sniped by Palpatine in one fell swoop felt like two five year olds arguing over action figures in the sandbox. “No! He’s dead now! Now the good guys can go on their quest!” “Well if he’s dead now, it’s only because MY guy was the REAL bad guy! DOOSHDOOSHDOOSHDOOSH!!” Like….really? At least Palpatine’s never-spoken-of Snoke manufacturing lab was vaguely interesting. Too bad we never saw anything about that- what a story of intergalactic puppet-masters that would have made! We’re not here for clever storytelling, though, so moving on…
+I don’t think they should have included Leia in this film. It really added to the disjointed nature of this movie with flat audio, crippled dialogue, and CGI where Leia only really had one facial expression for 90% of her appearances. It really wasn’t worth it. I know Star Wars doesn’t do flashbacks (which, frankly, I appreciate a lot), but I think they could have utilized the IDEA of Leia better than her actual self. Leia was forced, it showed, and it wasn’t good. Honestly they did a WAY better job reviving Tarkin in RO.
+An incredibly unnecessary amount of new information for the third act of a series was introduced in this film, starting with Leia suddenly being a well-trained Jedi or something. At least enough to ‘train’ Rey, which…frankly wasn’t believable. Leia having the force was a given. That she distanced herself from active application of the Force as a residual reaction to the bombshell of Darth Vader being her father is what is, and always has, made sense. THAT is a nuanced perspective, but it gets thrown out in favor of not just shoe-horning Leia in to the movie, but also because they had no idea what else to do with her at all in this film. This is also why Leia shouldn’t have been in this movie the way she was.
+Oh, you knew Palpatine was behind all this the whole time, Leia? Really? Always there, huh? When in TFA it was always snoke? Obvious dialogue lift is obvious, but the use of it was just Bad and inconsiderate to the story.
+Poe’s backstory was published on December 18th, 2015 in a book called “Before The Awakening” that details the lives of Poe, Finn, and Rey leading up to TFA. Poe is the son of two famous Rebel fighters and he grows up with a nice quiet life on Yavin 4 learning about ships and loving to fly. He goes straight from his home world to joining the Republic navy. It’s a handful of months before Leia Organa picks up on him and brings him into the Resistance. Now…this is a backstory that is JJ Abrams approved, has been out since 2015, and yet Oscar Isaac said he ‘never knew’ Poe’s backstory, and JJ somehow thinks four years later that there is space in this incredibly concise timeline for him to become a drug runner. What?? This was possibly the BIGGEST wtf moment for me in this film. What in the actual world. WHAT.
+Sidelining old characters to pointlessly introduce new ones does not serve a story, it clogs it up, drags down its rhythm, and confuses the hell out of it. As seen by Zorri and Jannah. And out of those two, only Jannah carried any kind of actual literary weight, because for Finn, he’s found more people like himself. This sort of setup is a typical play to foreshadow where Finn eventually settles down and goes at the end of the war. But this is never expounded on or explained further. It’s just, BOOM, more former troopers and a girl who is suddenly irrationally attached to him at all times.
+Rose gets replaced by Jannah, a brand new character that we only know one single thing about, and who gets to latch on to Finn out of the blue while Rose is left at home or on a ship. It was weird. It was obvious. It was incredibly awkward to watch. There was no point to Jannah clinging to Finn like this. She was reduced from a strong character to a cringy clingy one, while Finn’s love interest was completely ignored.
+The ‘Journey to The Rise of Skywalker’ comics released a couple weeks before the film heavily implied we’d get a lot of great Rose and Rey team time. We received none of it. It felt like someone had jerked a present away from us and it was a gross omission.
+It is only by the very end of the film and after multiple watches that you THINK they are trying to hint that Kylo is spiraling, thus why Leia steps in in death, but it never ever gets shown. Never once are we let in on Kylo’s state of mind. In fact, never once are we let in on *any* of these characters’ states of mind. We never really see what they are feeling or thinking or going through. Kylo is nothing but action when in TFA and TLJ we see him falling apart. This is what bad direction looks like, and it takes a Real Talent to fuck up directing an actor like Adam Driver. Another big sigh…
+There are only two cool things about this movie- The bleeding of reality between Kylo and Rey, and Palpatine’s shadow senate. When Kylo and Rey fight and the red bits go flying on the floor, it screamed serious TLJ aesthetics to me that I had to blink a moment. I think this ‘Bleed-through’ of their realities is the only TLJ hold-over we were allowed. It was a genuinely fascinating touch, which is how you know it didn’t come from *this* film’s production office.
+When you stick three people in a closet together, you expect some sort of progress in two-thirds of the potential relationships in such a cramped space. We received no such thing. Forced Trio Time resulted in no character development and seemed more like an unnecessary comic relief vehicle than anything.
+In ‘Before The Awakening’ and ‘Rey’s Survival Guide’, both publications printed under JJ Abrams’s  blessing, we learn Rey named *herself* after a helmet she found in the desert. How is it Rey’s alleged parents know her fake name? Gross, gross plot-hole.
+Four years was spent emphasizing that you don’t have to come from anywhere ‘special’ to be Important to a big story. Then they threw it out. Post-TROS interview with JJ reveals it was because they ‘couldn’t think of how else to get rey engaged in fighting palpatine’. Because he wasn’t a nasty enough dude on his own? Seriously? This is pure negligence.
+Four years was also spent emphasizing that you also don’t even NEED the force to be important to the big story and make a huge difference to the future. But let’s throw that out, too, and give Finn the force. Clearly regular people are absolutely worthless in the Star Wars Universe, according to JJ Abrams.
+Finn is only used to babysit Rey the entire time they share screen time together. The number of times he shouts her name could be turned into a drinking game. It’s one thing to care about somebody, and another thing entirely to act like you’re their high school chaperone. The whole thing was weird and awkward.
+Zorri Bliss sounds like a stripper name and she served no purpose other than to shoehorn Felicity into a star wars movie. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Babu Frik is the only true-to-star-wars critter in this whole film.
+Leia literally goes and lays down on her own funeral spread? What was that about. And that’s what that was because why would her bed be out in the open like that? That was really, really weird. And the RoTJ medal throwback was just a tacky tether to the past.
+Everyone seems so irrationally tethered to the past in this film. Kylo Ren’s spent two movies desperate to ‘leave the past behind’ and I don’t blame him at this point because it’s getting exhausting.
+As stated previously, it’s only vaguely suspected but Kylo seemed to SUPPOSED to be spiraling. Adam Driver plays Kylo like a man finally free of the voices in his head, but the plot and dialogue point to an entirely different direction saying that REALLY the monsters have allegedly doubled-down and he’s even more unhinged than before. Here is a MAJOR indication of story re-working after the film has already been shot. Adam Driver, and Daisy for that matter, is a PRECISE actor. It seems almost impossible to tell a story with him that you did not originally MEAN to tell. And it shows. JJ tried to U-Turn the story but it absolutely failed- Adam’s Kylo Ren is a calm, free man, focused, who finally knows what his purpose in life is, and that is uniting with his Dyad in the force. When really JJ tried very hard to suggest that he was spiraling so hard and so ‘lost’ in the Dark Side that it took his mother’s last breath to swing him back around. No one is going to see that narrative. The only reason why I see this shoddy attempt is because I’ve been absolutely immersed in this shit since December 2015. But the main audience? This was absolutely not conveyed.
+Seeing Dark Side Rey was nothing but a ‘cool’ moment and actually served zero function to the plot. Rey was always shown as being Grey in the force and someone who struggled to maintain balance. If that whole scene was removed, it wouldn’t change anything.
+Kylo was never in a position to kill Rey on the Death Star, and Rey taking her cheap shot to stab him while he heard his mother’s voice is an attempt to convey how much seeing her Sith self affected her than Kylo’s already very faded aggression in this film but it failed. It was weird and out of character, and even coming to that conclusion took may rewatches to come to because there is NEVER a ramp-up to Rey’s darkside taking over long enough to stab Kylo- there’s no fire, no red eyes, no teeth, none of it, to indicate she was ‘overcome’ so it just looked like bad mischaracterization. Yikes.
+Kylo and Han’s moment on the Death Star is the most moving scene of the entire film. The dialogue starts out rather familiar, and it almost seems like a cop-out, until you realize….how many times has Ben had this conversation with himself?? He doesn’t seem shocked at all that his father is there. Not at all. In fact, that Last Conversation on the bridge of Starkiller comes off as a well-rehearsed dance that Ben puts himself through regularly. And every time he hopes it’ll be affirmation enough that it’s all been worth it. But here, at the last reenactment of the worst day of his life, the script changes. He surrenders. He says dad. And he rejects Kylo Ren forever. Harrison Ford and Adam Driver are two beautifully matched, talented actors and I’d watch a movie with the two of them in it any day. God bless them.
+Hux has been wasted for the past two films. He was Terrifying in TFA and Dom gave him such significant presence that I was genuinely terrified for what he might try in the future. But instead he was lost as comic relief. When it is comically delivered that HE is the spy, every single person in my movie theatre shouted “WHAT??” in a way that was not a Good what, but in a “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me” kind of what, and I will never ever forget that. I hate seeing Star Wars diminished like this.
+Luke rehashing Obi-wan’s speech to him about how Rey MUST confront the Big Bad was an obvious rehash, and way too convenient to what Palpatine wanted. This whole appearance of Luke is very suspect, but that would be crediting them again with clever storytelling, which again this is not.
+Luke claims that Leia saw ‘the death of her son’ at the end of her Jedi Path, which one can assume why she threw it away. But then Luke says something bizarre about ‘hoping someone else would pick up her path someday’. Is that...is that not the same path leading to Ben’s death that she was avoiding in the first place? And if someone else picks it up, is that not no longer Leia’s path but that other person’s? Therefore, is not the outcome automatically going to be different and thus *avoid* Ben’s death? This was an attempt at supposedly clever foreshadowing or Mystical Talk or some shit, but all it was was dialogue that backfired in meaning spectacularly due to looping-in on itself too many times. Luke negates himself at the same time he tries to prove his point...which he then negates in the same breath. What a mess.
+All of Ben Solo’s lines were cut the last act of the film to stuff more pointless exposition at the END of film and to give more screen time to Ian McDiarmid. Ian’s great, but he’s not the main character of this series, and cutting Ben’s lines for this was Gross.  
+Space Horses? Really?? I didn’t like them in TLJ but at least there they had context- they had zero context here. The size of the horses and the ship they came off of was absurdly mismatched. Is that ship the TARDIS? That whole bit was so unnecessary and ridiculous, especially with zero setup. Which is amazing because this film is 90% set-up.
+All those ships at the end? That’s all it took? After books and comics going on about how everyone’s too terrified to help Leia because of FO scorched earth policy? Jesus it was weak, and too obvious a Deus ex Machina with THAT many ships.
+Palpatine’s Shadow Senate is cool. The idea that this guy trapped on an ugly planet stuck on Sith life-support couldn’t go two seconds without attention and praise to the point where he had to recreate the exact same senate he destroyed years ago is a concept I like. Is the Shadow Senate just in the *shape* of the old senate but filled with animated Sith proxies? Or is it actually comprised of the enslaved souls of former Senators now forced to attend the Emperor for eternity? Either way, destroying the Shadow Senate at least either set those souls free or sent them back to wherever they came from. That was actually interesting, and it’s a shame we didn’t get to learn more about such a genuinely creepy thing.
+Palpatine’s ‘we’re family’ routine drops the moment he realizes Ben and Rey are a dyad. This is suspicious, but considering the whole movie so far, it seems incorrect to giver JJ and Torrio credit for a possible mis-direct.
+Rey and Ben’s realities bleeding into each other is experienced again in swapping the light saber. This is cool. This is probably the coolest moment in the film. And then the coolness literally gets thrown into a pit when, instead of the both of them, as a Dyad, defeating Palpatine, Rey is left to carry the burden alone.
+Oh hey look a cop-out to save Rey from being bad- just have her reflect his own power back at him so it’s like he’s killing himself, wow, so original! The second Palpy revealed his gameplan about wanting to die, this became the obvious choice to both kill him and avoid giving him what he wanted. Eh….
+The Star Wars 9-movie series is the story of one man desperately begging anyone within hearing range to kill him, apparently. This is so, so old by the 9th friggin movie. 
+Ben Solo spends his entire life begging for guidance from his ancestors only to be ignored and Rey get all their attention instead. Ben Solo spends his entire life since the womb being a burden to his parents by merely existing and being manipulated by gross sith ghosts. But nah, let’s be parents to Rey and help out Rey. This is not to say she doesn’t deserve any of this, but to say there are priorities here- Rey has had a lonely life, but at least she had her sanity and was self-sufficient. Ben had neither his sanity or any control over his own life whatsoever. And to place Rey above Ben is a literal mess. The two of them were meant by the Force to rise TOGETHER, and it didn’t happen.
+Rey doesn’t disappear when she ‘dies’ after using the last of her life force to both feed Palpatine, fight him, AND defeat him. And yet while Rey has two strikes in her before kicking it, Ben, someone who is RADICALLY more trained in the force, its lore, and mechanics, only has one? This doesn’t make any sense.
+Rey has no reaction to the literal other half of her soul vanishing in front of her. Because this is a mangled JJ Abrams Finale(tm) and why should anyone, let alone his own characters, have any space to Feel? I mean, that’s not what movies are even about, right? Feeling and Telling A Story? It’s not that, right? Right?? JJ Abrams covers up Rey’s reaching-hands scar on her arm for the entire film, doesn’t address it, and apparently hates the shit out of it. I don’t know how the King of Cheese could possibly hate something like that. It was a weird and obvious omission, and frankly disappointing because the scar had come to mean something at the end of TLJ and it, like a lot in this film, got thrown in the trash.
+More forced trio time in the form of a group hug where nothing gets actually expressed because we ran out of space for dialogue 30 pages back.
+Anakin Skywalker viewed Tatooine, his place of enslavement, as the worst place in the galaxy. Luke Skywalker spent his entire youth trying to escape. Leia hated it on principle because it was where Darth Vader came from and where she herself had been enslaved in a gross gold bikini for a giant slug. Rey spent 14 years of her life dreaming of leaving the sand planet she was trapped on. But I guess that’s a fitting place to bury some memories, yeah? The place where nothing good ever, ever happened. That’s a nice spot, right?
+Rey Skywalker isn’t explained, is never led up to, and feels like a gross gimmie after four years of trying to create a Better Message that names don’t matter. HEAVY SIGH.
+Rey watches the two suns set as she is left with little more than she started- alone, on a sand planet, but this time taunted by the Twin Suns of Tatooine that the other half of her soul is literally missing and that she is now left with a gaping wound in her Force signature and her own spirit worse than if she’d just lost a Force Bonded mate.
+Ben Solo is left missing, vanished on a world that is supposedly a thin spot in the force, with no ghost, no presence, and no one to mourn him- not even by the other half of his very soul. THREE GENERATIONS of Skywalkers over NINE FILMS died to try and rescue their future embodied in the form of Ben Solo and it looks like it was for nothing. Instead, the incessant bad guy no one can move on from looks like he ultimately wins the day through an alleged granddaughter, and even that claim is on shaky ground considering the mistakes in the vision and how quickly the family conversation vanished upon the revelation that Ben and Rey are a dyad. Ben is lost, so every family member died for nothing, apparently. But hey, this is a Fun and Hopeful narrative, right?
+While the Final Order fleet is destroyed at the end, the First Order is.....still out there? It’s still out there. Nothing in that department has changed whatsoever. Leaders die. They get replaced. The cycle goes on. We spent three movies batting at a fly we didn’t even kill. Amazing.
Overall this movie is BRUTAL. Every other scene is a plot hole served to us on a silver platter, with the biggest insult being that they are plot points JJ created HIMSELF 4-6 years ago. This man literally shot himself in the face and then said it was fine as he bled out all over the film reels and it shows. If you were anyone who came along for the Additional Materials ride of the past four years, you were greeted by this film with a hard, swift, and REPEATED, backhand to the face. There was no reward here at the end of this road for fans, old and new, who actually paid attention and took an interest in the deeper lore surrounding this sequel trilogy. There was just a big fat Disney-branded middle finger as all your hard work and cash was ripped from you with a trademark villain laugh.
And that is what we’re left with.
This review does not go into detail over what we’ve discovered since the release of the film, either. That it was never finished in the editing room. That a current comic series, Rise of Kylo Ren, and what’s in the new TROS visual dictionary maddeningly contradict themselves. That allegedly SIX different endings were shot for this movie, and in the end the one they chose looks like it was *literally* reverse-engineered to confusingly kill, as JJ once called him, ‘The Other Half of Our Protagonist’. There is no time to go into detail about how Oscar Isaac just told us that noone in the cast knew that Rey Palpatine was going to be endgame except for maybe Adam when they made him do ADR declaring it with a masked face on screen (convenient). There is no room to show you the collective cast reaction they all gave to the end of the movie- none of them good, and John Boyega looking like he was holding back from punching something (he loved Kylo/Ben as much as the audience did and more). And there is no room to include what we will continue to find out as the days roll on about the tangled mess of a film that was edited and reedited, and how word on the street is a cocky director demanded Carte Blanche from Kathleen Kennedy, and I guess the story group too given the state of things, and then promptly self-destructed in the grossest, messiest end to a 40+ year series in cinema history.
There’s just no space.
But there IS a lesson.
And the lesson is this: No matter what, never stop investing in Story. Never stop caring about the details and about plot and about moving a story FORWARD. Never be afraid to move FORWARD. Look at TROS, the mess it is and the potential it had it in itself to be, and then look at the beauty that is TFA and the love that went into TLJ, and study that shit until it burns into your brain- Do not repeat those mistakes. Go out into the world and write better, shoot better, direct better, and BE BETTER. Because these producers and directors? They’re old and they’re on their way out. Just like the stable boy at the end of TLJ who secretly has the Force, know and realize that those of you out there reading this are the next generation of storytellers. YOU. And YOU, and I, and others out there like us who loved this series with our whole heart and who are watching it bleed out now on a floor that doesn’t give two shits about it, have the ability to make sure this NEVER happens again. But in order to do that….we have to pick up that pen. Pick up that pencil. Pick up that camera. Jot down that story idea and share it with likeminded friends. Go out there and CREATE, and create BETTER. Because it’s up to us now- the future of cinema is up to us. And my god, we have so much potential….
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trensu · 4 years
Text
Episode 28: The One where LXC Loses his Title as Greatest Wingman
THAT’S RIGHT GUYS
WE’RE HERE
THE ONE THAT HOLDS ONE OF THE MOST PRECIOUS, CLASSIC WANGXIAN SCENES IN THE WHOLE SHOW
THE SCENE THAT JUST BURSTS WITH WANGXIAN DOMESTICITY AND WE DIE FROM THE SHEER FLUFFINESS OF IT ALL
Shockingly this VERY IMPORTANT wangxian moment doesn’t start until the 34min mark.
So we’re gonna power through those first 34min to get to the parts that actually matter
We’re still at the burial mounds
Emotional Yungmeng Bro Drama happens
It’s very upsetting
There’s a lot of feelings everywhere.
I can’t defend you if you keep this path, jc protests 
You can’t defend me? Then Leave me, wwx says, tell the world i defected, he says, my actions are no longer associated with the jiang clan he says
WHO KNEW BROTHERLY LOVE COULD BE SO PAINFUL, AMIRITE GUYS? HAHA *CHOKES BACK SOBS*
LET’S SKIP AHEAD!
Jc’s gone, maybe it’ll get better now??
A-YUAN TIME!!
Oh no, little a-yuan is hungry!!
Wen qing gives him the last of the fruit because a-yuan activated her Good Big Sister instincts
Ah, look at his happy face as he takes the fruit!
The wwx shows up with MORE fruit and a-yuan does the leg-grabby thing!!
ADORABLE 
Great, now we get Emotional WWX and WQ Bonding Time
SHE TRIES TO GIVE HIM AN OUT
SHE TRIES TO GET HIM BACK TO HIS FAMILY
Wwx is not having it so instead he acts all charming and teases her until the matter is dropped
I LOVE THEM SO MUCH
Other stuff happens, boring boring boring
Moving forward
Yunmeng bro fight scene!
The first half was pretty neat and then they did a bunch of funky flying moves that had me like, why, why must you do this, please stop and give me wangxiantics instead
They did not stop
But they did do some wonderful Twirling, so I guess i can forgive them a little
Oh, sadface, a paperman gets viciously slaughtered by jc
(@theuntamednarrator​ pointed out that this fight scene PARALLELS a future fight scene on a moonlit rooftop THAT WE’RE NOT GONNA THINK ABOUT BECAUSE IT MAKES ME SAD)
Wwx, at some point in this fight is all: oh look, i’ve been impaled
(what’s a little light stabbing between siblings, amirite?)
More stuff happens that we don’t care about
But we’ll take a moment to laugh at wwx here
Wwx is like, imma hide this gaping stab wound from the world’s greatest doctor by distracting her with potatoes
It doesn’t quite work bc wen qing immediately makes a grab for him
Wwx is scandalized!
Wwx: Men and women shouldn’t be improperly intimate!!
Wwx: you suddenly doing this makes me scared for my virtue which i’m obviously saving for lan zhan!
She backs off for half a second; then wwx winces but he recovers quickly by being all i’m totally fine, look at how fine i am, i’m flinching because of HUNGER PAINS, NOTHING ELSE
If he weren't so charming and adorable none of this would've worked
Other non-wangxian nonsense occurs
Some more non-wangxian stuff
A scene featuring Disaster Het Jin Zixuan and our Perfect Elder Sister Jiang Yanli
Jzx is all, i know carp tower isn’t your home but i’m willing to build another lotus pier here for you
...ugh, fine, okay, maybe you’ve grown on me a little by now, you huge Disaster Het BUT ONLY BECAUSE YOU’RE MAKING JYL HAPPY, YOU HEAR ME?? ALL BETS ARE OFF IF YOU MAKE HER CRY AGAIN
We’ve made it through the 34 minutes!!
GET READY GUYS
We’re at a tea house in Yiling! There’s lots of people! AND THEY’RE ALL TRASH-TALKING MY BEAUTIFUL SUNSHINE BOY WTF
But hey, look in the background is lwj, (angrily) listening to people trash-talk our sunshine boy.
God, he sits so straight, it looks almost painful
I mean, in terms of posture
We know he’s not straight in any other way lol
The only time we get full body shots of him in this scene is when he’s blurred and out of focus in the background, which is interesting
When he’s at the forefront of the scene, it’s all close-ups of his (angry) face 
But even with the close ups, we only see parts of his face. One half of his face at a time, close-ups on the eyes (or one eye) specifically at times
It’s not until the end of that teahouse scene that we get to see a full shot of him and that’s only when he’s had Enough of people slandering his soulmate and slams his (poor innocent) tea cup onto the table and (viciously) glares at the gossipers
He leaves the teahouse (angrily)
Lwj is (angrily) walking through the marketplace 
He walks past some random lady and the lady turns the hell around so fast and BLATANTLY CHECKS HIM OUT, oh god, that’s HILARIOUS
(you are not alone in this, lady, YOU ARE NOT ALONE)
Then, we have one of the best tropes of all, ACCIDENTAL CHILD ACQUISITION
THERE IS A CHILD CLINGING TO HIS LEG
IT’S A-YUAN
A-YUAN HAS SURGICALLY ATTACHED HIMSELF TO LWJ
WE ALL LOVE HIM FOR IT
Wwx does not notice his child is missing bc he is haggling, which is important but maybe not as important as missing a child. 
Omg the look of panic on his face when he finally realizes a-yuan is gone gutted me for half a second. 
REALIZING YOU’VE LOST A CHILD IN A CROWDED PLACE IS THE WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD, OKAY
But i get over this quickly bc WWX FINDS A-YUAN CLINGING TO LWJ’S LEG. 
GUYS
GUYS
THIS SCENE
THIS SCENE MAKES ME SO HAPPY
IT’S MADE OF RAINBOWS AND BUTTERFLIES AND ITTY BITTY KITTIES
Okay, let's break it down because there’s JUST SO MUCH GOOD STUFF HERE WE NEED TO PROPERLY APPRECIATE ALL OF IT
FIRSTLY, lwj’s face.
There is a loudly crying child clinging to his leg
He is surrounded by nosy talkative strangers (PARENT strangers!!) all Judging™ him for his (lack of) parenting skills
And lwj’s face is about as External Panic as lwj can make it bc our boy is FREAKING OUT
THERE IS A CRYING CHILD
LATCHED ON TO HIS LEG
STRANGERS ARE ASSUMING HE’S THE FATHER
BUT HE ISN’T
THEY DON’T LISTEN WHEN HE TELLS THEM HE ISN’T
THEY SAY THEY HAVE THE SAME NOSE?? THEY SAY HE RESEMBLES THIS STRANGE UNKNOWN CRYING CHILD SOMEHOW?? 
AND WORSE STILL, THEY’RE SAYING HE’S A BAD FATHER
THEY’RE ALL LIKE, OH LOOK HE SCOLDED HIS POOR KID AND NOW WON’T EVEN HUG HIS KID TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER??
HIS FACE, OMG
HIS FACE SCREAMS: DEAR GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP 
LWJ IS DYING INSIDE
AND HE KIND OF WANTS TO DIE OUTSIDE
(There’s one guy who kinda takes pity on him and was like, ah, he’s your first kid, huh? I was like that with MY first kid but now i know everything after my wife gave a few more births. It’s a learning process!)
And ohoho, boy, does lwj learn (later, after horrible horrible things happen)
Secondly, WWX IS HAVING THE TIME OF HIS LIFE WATCHING ALL OF THIS UNFOLD BEFORE HIM
HIS SMILE IS HEART-STOPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL
HE’S STIFLING GIGGLES
IT’S SO CUTE I WANNA DIE
Finally, wwx takes pity on poor lan zhan
I would like to point out that he takes pity on lan zhan only after  the crowd of Judgy Parents start asking A-Yuan where his mother is
And like, i don’t want to fall into the pit of heteronormativity and stereotypical gender roles, BUT THAT’S HILARIOUS
Wwx: Lan zhan!
Lwj looks up and the world fades away when he sees wwx, with his cute little smile, making his way towards him in slo-mo
Like, literally slow motion and literally the world fades away until basically only wwx is in focus, THIS IS HOW LWJ SEES WWX ALL THE TIME, OMG IT’S AMAZING
AND OF COURSE ~THEIR SONG~ IS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND
I’M SCREAMING, EVERYTHING IS GREAT
LWJ STARES AT HIM WITH SUCH YEARNING
And even when they’re right in front of each other, they KEEP STARING AT EACH OTHER, SOAKING UP EACH OTHER’S PRESENCE
WHICH I LOVE, but also there’s a crying child right there maybe take care of him??
Wwx: lan zhan, what a coincidence! What are you doing i yiling?
WHAT DO YOU THINK HE’S DOING IN YILING, WWX
IT’S NOT LIKE HIS SOULMATE LIVES AROUND THAT AREA OR ANYTHING
Lwj: night hunt. Passing by.
Short and sweet and to the point
I’m convinced it’s because his brain has short-circuited from the double whammy of Accidental Child Acquisition and OMG My Beautiful Soulmate is With Me and Smiling
Lwj: ....this child
Wwx: ah, yes, this is MY son
I read a post on tumblr that says the actual translation of that line was more like “ah, yes, i gave birth to this child”
Which would explain lwj’s absolutely stunned and confused expression
I mean, the fact that he doesn’t immediately dismiss this as the nonsense that it is, is absolutely HILARIOUS to me
Like, for a split second there he honestly believed wwx??
He must’ve been like, wait, is this a side effect of demonic cultivation??!?!?
That doesn’t sound right but i don’t know enough about demonic cultivation to dispute it
But then wwx starts giggling at him which gives away the game
Wwx: hey, lan zhan, what did you do? Why is a-yuan crying?
Lwj: I didn’t do anything
Wwx: ah, i see what happened. Lan zhan, as pretty as you look, you still have resting bitch face. 
(no for real, wwx called him pretty, i died a little when i heard him say it and i’m pretty sure lwj did too)
Wwx: a-yuan doesn’t know any better so of course he’d look at you and start crying!!
Lwj stares at a-yuan (who is now clinging adorably to wwx) and you can see in his face that his New Life Mission is to get A-Yuan to Like Him.
It is IMPERATIVE that this small child Like Him. Not for any particular reason, of course. But this Must happen.
Even if it means having to go to an Ancient Fantasy China plastic surgeon to get his resting bitch face problem resolved
THANK GOD WE DON’T HAVE TO RESORT TO THAT
Wwx kneels down to comfort a-yuan and lwj watches him interact with this small child and VISIBLY SWALLOWS before looking away
Like it was too much cute to handle
Like oh shit, i want wwx’s children
Like oh shit, i want to be a dad???
GUYS WE SEE THE EXACT MOMENT LWJ REALIZES HE WANTS KIDS
THANK YOU WORLD FOR BLESSING US WITH THIS MOMENT
Okay, quiz time! 
How do we make a small child stop crying?
Answer - Distraction!
What is the best distraction for a small child?
Answer - TOYS
Wwx pulls a-yuan to a toy stall 
The music here gets all upbeat and playful. (In fact, it’s the same music that played in the ‘flower petals rain on LWJ’ scene in The One where NHS is Total Cockblock omg i just had to reference my own guide to make sure that was the right episode lol this is exactly why i’m making this). I love this music!!
So they admire the toys and wwx picks up one of them and is like, do you like this one?
A-yuan of course says yes bc all kids love toys
Then wwx is like, cool, and proceeds to drag a-yuan away from the toy stall without the toy
SAD FACE A-YUAN :(
Lwj sees Sad Face A-Yuan and does the Lan Clan version of running (aka lengthening his strides and quickening his steps slightly)
Lwj: wei ying, why didn’t you buy it for him?
Dude, he sounds almost accusatory here, it’s GREAT
Wwx: ??? why should I???
Lwj: you asked him if he wanted it, doesn’t that mean you’re going to buy it?
Wwx: asking is asking, buying is buying. Who says i have to buy something just because i asked about it?
Wwx, lwj has a point tho. It’s kinda mean to lead a kid on like that 
And here lwj sounds all hesitant (and shy?? maybe??) like he doesn’t want to scare a-yuan again. He looks at him briefly
Lwj: which one...do you want.
Then when a-yuan doesn’t immediately burst into tears, he speaks more confidently.
Lwj: among those, which one did you want?
And a-yuan points to the toy he wants with all the confidence small children have when  they know they’re about to get exactly what they want
Omg, lwj looks at wwx as soon as he sees which toy a-yuan wants
It’s a look that says I’M GETTING THIS CHILD A TOY AND YOU CAN’T STOP ME
And wwx just beams at him like a ray of sunshine!! HE’S MELTING INSIDE, YOU CAN TELL
HE’S ALL LIKE, OMG LAN ZHAN IS SO SWEET WITH CHILDREN
OMG LAN ZHAN WOULD BE A GREAT DAD
OMG I WANT LAN ZHAN TO CO-DAD A-YUAN WITH ME
Cut to a-yuan gleefully playing with his new toys 
He and wwx are play fighting with cute little wooden swords and it’s SO ADORABLE I’M GONNA DIE
And lwj watches them for moment with the FONDEST LOOK ON HIS FACE
A-yuan notices that lwj is there again and immediately ditches wwx to cling to lwj’s leg
Smart, kid, smart
Butter up the rich guy who makes wwx smile
Wwx laughs: lan zhan, congrats! My kid likes you! He only hugs the legs of his favorite people and then never lets go
Lwj: *internally probably* i wish YOU’D hug me and never let me go
Also
YES! LIFE MISSION COMPLETE. WWX’S CHILD LIKES ME
Wwx: you should ditch your night hunt and have a meal with me
Lwj: a meal?
Lwj: *internally probably* OMG DID HE JUST ASK ME OUT ON A DATE?? AND HE CALLED ME PRETTY EARLIER??? TODAY IS THE BEST DAY
He then pretends to hesitate bc YOU GOTTA PLAY IT COOL
CAN’T CLUE HIM IN ON HOW DESPERATELY YOU WANT TO KEEP HIM WITH YOU FOREVER
BE COOL, LWJ, BE COOL, BE COOL
Wwx: c’mon, we hardly see each other! We can reminisce about the old days! It’ll be my treat~!
Wwx what, YOU HAVE NO MONEY WHAT ARE YOU EVEN SAYING
Wwx grabs lwj’s arm and drags him away
Lwj’s brain rn: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But they run off WITHOUT A-YUAN??
Good thing a-yuan is quick on his feet, god damn
AND THAT’S THE END OF ONE OF THE BESTEST EPISODES OF THE SHOW
GOD I NEEDED THIS AFTER THE HELLSCAPE OF LAST EPISODE WHERE EVERYONE MADE ME ANGRY
And lets give a round of applause to our precious adorable A-Yuan who somehow managed to latch on to the one person in the entire town that is completely head over heels in love with wwx and who wwx has been pining for since their sad separation in the rain.
FOUR FOR YOU, A-YUAN. YOU GO, A-YUAN!!
Return to Masterpost
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moistmailman · 5 years
Text
House Wife AU part 5
*Halloween Night*
Pyrrha, wearing a cowboy costume: *handing out candy* Oh my goodness, what are you supposed to be, sweetie?
Little boy, happily: I’m an astwonaut!
Pyrrha, giggling: Well you have to be the cutest little astronaut ever. Here you go. *puts candy in bag.
Boy's parents: What do you say to the nice lady?
Little boy: Thank you, nice lady.
Pyrrha, smiling sweetly: You’re welcome, sweetie. Have a happy Halloween! *shuts door and yells towards her stairs* Hey kids! Are you guys almost ready for trick or treating?
Troy’s voice, from up stairs: Yeah hold on! Almost done!
Pyrrha: Please hurry! Uncle Roman and Mercury should be here any minute no—
*Door bell rings*
Pyrrha, grabbing bowl of candy: Ope, more trick or treaters. *opens door* Happy Halloween!
Roman, chuckling: Oooh, we get candy too?
Mercury: And here I thought this holiday was only for kids.
Pyrrha, chuckling: Oh, it’s you two. I’m sorry. I thought you guys were trick or treaters. Please, come in. The kids are getting ready.
Mercury, walking in: So, are the kiddos excited to go trick or treating?
Pyrrha, smiling: They sure are. They been waiting all year for this. They were too excited to go to sleep last night actually. They were too busy talking about how much candy they were going to get. It was adorable.
Roman, smiling: Yeah, I'm sure it was. So, where’s Cindie?
Pyrrha, frowning: Hmm? She should be around here somewhere. Where is she? Hey sweetheart, come here! Roman and Mercury are here!
Cinder’s voice, sighing in the other room: Hold on! Just....give a minute.
Mercury, raising an eyebrow: What’s wrong with her?
Pyrrha, smiling: Oh nothing. Our kids’ picked our costumes and she’s....she’s not the biggest fan of hers.
Roman: Oh really? How bad is it?
Pyrrha: It’s not even bad. She’s just being a little grump. Cinder, sweetheart, are you coming?
Cinder’s voice, approaching: Yeah, hold on! I’m on my way.
*Suddenly Cinder grudgingly walks through the door with a Bo Peep costume on, including the pink polkadotted dress, hat, and even cane*
Cinder, scowling:...........
Roman/Mercury:........*snorts laughter*
Cinder, glaring: You shut your god damn mouths!
Mercury, laughing: Nice costume. Where's your other toy friends?
Cinder, gritting her teeth: Shut up.
Roman, laughing: Are you trying out a new look or something? It really suits you.
Cinder: I swear to God I will fucking shove my foo—
Pyrrha: Hey, language. Just calm down and ignore them, okay? Besides, I think you look really cute in that costume anyway. *kisses her* You're my cute Bo Peep.
Cinder, sighing: Where are the kids?
Pyrrha, smiling: They should be coming down. *Yells towards the stairs* Hey kids! Come down, uncle Roman and Mercury are here!
*Loud footsteps are heard*
Achilles’s voice: COMING!
*Achilles and Troy excitedly run down stairs in sheep costumes*
Pyrrha, cooing: Aww, look how precious you two look. You’re my two little precious lambs. *kisses their heads*
Mercury: So, I see there’s a theme going on.
Pyrrha, smiling: Yeah, they just saw toy story last week and loved it. So they picked our costumes and we picked theirs. *Cooing* And I'm honestly so happy I picked these costumes, but they are absolutely adorable, I swear. Whose mommy's little lambs? *Kisses their heads a bunch againi
Achilles: Mooom! You're embarrassing us!
Pyrrha, punching Achilles cheek: Oh nonsense. There's nothing embarrassing about a mother's love. Now scoot together so I can't take some pictures.
*Pyrrha snaps a bunch of pictures of her kids, while slightly getting teary eyed and mumbling about her "precious lambs"*
Roman, crouching down: So are you kiddos ready for trick or treating?
Achilles, jumping: Heck yeah I am!
Troy, shaming with excitement: I can’t wait! We are going to get so much candy!
Mercury: You got that right! We marked all the rich people’s house that give the best candy out! So your bags are going to be packed!
Achilles: Yes! I can’t wait!
Troy: Lets Go!
Cinder: Hold on, guys. Let me have a word with your 'uncles' real quick. Comm’ere for a minute, you two.
Mercury, sighing: Oh great.
Roman, sighing: Just give us a minute kids. This won’t take long.
*Cinder escorts Mercury and Roman to the living room privately*
Cinder, deadly serious: I just want to tell you guys that if you lose our kids, or if ANYTHING happens to them, I’ll kill you both.
Roman, rolling his eyes: Yeah Yeah, I know.
Cinder: I’m serious. I will kill you both with no hesitation at all. No matter how far you run, and where you hide, I will find and slaughter you both like the dogs you are.
Mercury, groaning: We know already. You literally tell us this each time we baby sit them at all.
Cinder, growling: And I mean it each and everytime too. Don’t let them out of your sights, or so help me god I’ll—
Roman, rolling his eyes: Kill us, we got it. Can we go now?
Cinder: Yeah. Get out of here. And don’t make me regret letting you do this.
Roman, smiling: Right. See you around, farmer’s daughter.
Cinder: Dont you fucking call me th—
Roman, leaving with the kids: Let’s go guys. Say bye bye to your mommies.
Troy/Achilles, waving: Bye bye!
Pyrrha, smiling and waving: Goodbye, we love you! Have fun and be safe!
Roman, waving: We will. See you later.
Pyrrha, smiling: Well the kids are gone now. So you know what that means we can do finally~
Cinder, smiling: Oh most definitely.
Pyrrha: Time to watch a bunch of bad horror movies!
Cinder, chuckling: Yep! Ill make the popcorn! Let's go!
*hours later*
Roman, walking down the street: Man, I can’t believe that Cindie doesn’t fully trust us with the kiddos yet.
Mercury: I know right. I mean, we’re great babysitters.
Roman: We’re the best! And we’re doing this for free too! She should be greatful!
Mercury: She really should! But no, she thinks we're nothing but idiots.
Roman: Tell me about it. We're not that dumb. We are actually very two smart men!
Mercury: You can say that again! Plus the kids love us! Don’t you guys?
Achilles/Troy:.........
Mercury, concerned: Hey, are you kiddos alright? Wait, did you guys change bags or something? *crouches down* What’s goin—.......
Roman, worries: What? What’s wrong? *crouches down* Do they have candy on their mouths or som— *gasps* O-oh my god.
*Roman looks and sees two confused kids wearing identical sheep costumes, but being completely two different kids, both of them being cat faunuses*
Roman, panicking: Oh my fucking god!
Mercury, panicking: Please tell me I’m going insane! Please tell me that I don’t see two cat ears on them right now! Tell me anything but—
Roman, nearly crying: Jesus Christ, we somehow mixed up kids! We got the wrong ones!
Mercury, voice cracking: Anything BUT that!
Roman: Oh my god! This can't be happening?! We just accidentally committed two kidnappings! How is this even possible?! How did we manage to do this?! The chances of this happening is comically and astronomically low! Oh fuck!! This is so stupid, even for us! Oh my god! This doesn't happen to normal people! This is like some three stooges level of stupidity! Cinder's going to kill is!
Mercury: Stop jumping to conclusion man! We might not die! Look, maybe....just maybe, Cinder might not notice if we show up with these two instead. L-like, we could dye her hair red and boom, it's essentially Achilles and Troy! That's possible, right?
Roman: NO, YOU DAMN IDIOT! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?! DID YOU SUDDENLY GROW SHIT FOR BRAINS OR SOMETHING?! FOR GOD SAKE, ONE OF THEM IS A GIRL! A GIRL WITH CAT EARS! HOW THE HELL ARE WE GOING TO CONVINCE THEIR PARENTS THAT THEYRE ACHILLES AND TROY?! AND WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH THESE TWO KIDS RIGHT HERE?!
Mercury: I DONT KNOW BUT STOP YELLING AT ME, IM GRASPING FOR STRAWS! I'M DESPERATE!
Roman: OH MY GOD! SHE’S GOING GO KILL US!!! SHE’S ACTUALLY GOING GO KILL US! WE’RE DEAD! WE’RE SO DEAD! OH CHRIST, WE NEED TO MOVE AWAY, FAR AWAY TO A PLACE WHERE SHE CANT FIND US! CHANGE IDENTITIES AND LOOKS! ROMAN AND MERCURY NO LONGER EXIST ANYMORE! WE’RE NOW GRAY AND YURI! GROW A MUSTACHE WHILE I GROW A GOATEE OR SOMETHING, I DONT FUCKING KNOW–
Mercury: GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, MAN! WE GOTTA CALM DOWN! WE CANT JUST GIVE UP HOPE RIGHT AWAY! HOPE IS ALL WE GOT! LOOK, WE JUST GOTTA FIND THESE KIDS’ PARENT AND THEN WE’RE FIND OUR KIDS! OKAY?! ALL IS NOT LOST!
Roman: YOURE RIGHT! ALL WE GOTTA DO IS FIND THEM AND WE ARENT DEAD! YOU'RE BRILLIANT!
Mercury: Okay, uhm....Heya kiddos, uhm.....do you think you guys can show us to your house? You have any idea where you live?
One of the kids: *nods quietly*
Mercury: Yes yes yes yes! We aren’t going to die! We are going to survive! Okay, let’s go!
*meanwhile*
Pyrrha, eating popcorn: I honestly don’t understand why everyone in these horror movies are so dumb. Like, does common sense don't exist in these worlds?
Cinder, chuckling: How else are they supposed to die in these easily avoidable ways for our amusement?
Pyrrha, giggling: Yeah, I guess you’re right. But couldn't they just make the killer smarter?
Cinder: Yeah, but then they would have to put effort into the writing.
Pyrrha: *snorts*
*Phone rings in the kitchen*
Cinder, standing: I'll get it.
Pyrrha: Can you make some more popcorn while you’re at it?
Cinder, smiling: Yeah, hold on.
*Cinder walks into the kitchen and answer their phone*
Cinder: Hello?........Yang? Yang who? Oh wait, you’re one of Pyrrha’s friends, right?....oh, okay. How can I help you?........wait, slow down. You're talking to fast.......what do you mean your wife’s going to kill you if she finds out. What’s going on?......uh no, why would we have your kids?......a mix up? What mix up?.......why do you have Troy and Achil— OH MY GOD, I’M GOING TO KILL THEM!!!
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heavymetalchemist · 4 years
Text
Who’s ready for a barely-edited unhinged somewhat drunken rant to my friends about Jiang Cheng?
ME: okay so here is why jiang cheng is THE BEST and I will fite anyone who doesn't like him. first off when we first meet him he is obviously supposed to be a dick, like I didn't like him at first either, I was like "what the fuck is this guy's problem" but O MY FRIENDS do we ever find out what his problem is.
here we have this guy who we see is very talented, very strong, cares a lot about doing A Good Job and his appearance. oh yes Jiang Cheng cares so much about his reputation and this is portrayed as kind of a weakness/flaw, which isn't totally inaccurate. But WHY is he like this?? Because his parents suck essentially
like the whole part where he's like "my dad doesn't like me because he doesn't like my mom" is super telling because do we ever see in the show any affection shown to jc from his parents? basically like twice: the one time his mom hugs him and he's like O_O omg mom is hugging me???? this has never happened what do???? which, oh no baby
and then when he is having his golden core transplant and we see the flashback to when he was a CHILD. like the one time with his brother and sister and parents and they are happy and smiling and calling for him to join and he sees his little child self running... and then TEARS OF BLOOD OH NO
so basically like, his dad sucks for being strict with him and not really fathering him at all, his mom is basically straight up abusive. he never gets shown affection by ANYONE except for Yanli and Wei Ying. So obviously those are his two primary relationships.
but the thing is he wants that parental approval SO BAD. that's why he has all this pressure to be like, the perfect clan leader's son, the perfect young cultivator, etc etc. Literally any flaw will be pounced on by his mom or just ignored by his dad. Like he's just trying to get his dad to acknowledge him and his mom to maybe not yell at him?
meanwhile wwx is just dicking around and being contrary and like, jc wants that. It's why he's always with him. It's why he's there with the Party Room at the cloud recesses having the alcohol with huiasang, it's why he's always by wwx's side, and it's why he makes that comment, when have I ever dodged a punishment with you?
like he's incredibly fiercely loyal to wwx because even though he has this inferiority thing, especially since his dad really IS kinder and more affectionate to wwx, wwx is the one person he can depend on
like yanli is obviously an emotional support to both of them and basically a surrogate mother, but she's not anywhere near their level of cultivation and he's like, obviously we must protect her. like what can she really do to protect either of them? so they both take it upon themselves to protect her
like I don't know how much you saw of the anime or whatever R but in that one/the novel the scene where Jin Zixuan disses her is way harsher
R: :gasp:
ME: and jc wants to punch him and wwx shoves him out of the way precisely because he knows that he, wwx, can be the unruly child and fuck up
R: I haven't watched past the first episode of the anime yet, and in the show it's ?????
ME: so he is protecting jc because jc would END that guy for attacking his sister
oh yeah they want to fucking kick his ass
R: But wow, yeah in the novel it's really clear that wwx is like 'I got him'
ME: like wwx is literally protecting jc because he knows that would cause all sorts of interclan drama. I mean he also wants to fuck the guy up too but the thing is that wwx always trusts jc to do the right thing. out on the night hunt with the wen clan when they have no swords and he goes to help lan zhan? he's like, I gotta it's the right thing, and jc is all like, you gotta worry about yourself? like wwx just goes off because he knows that jc will be fine on his own. he trusts his strength
we see it later in the cave with the slaughter xanwu (sp) where jc is the one who goes swimming and finds the exit and leads people out, and he's like desperately trying to get wwx out and is all I WILL COME BACK FOR YOU
but wwx is like, nah jc will definitely get us help. it's only a matter of time. NO DOUBT. AT ALL
MARLOWE: WALKED TO YUNMENG AND BACK
NO REST
NO CREDIT
ME: and jc is basically constantly like I love you but you keep getting into these situations, and you don't understand that I would fucking die for you. because what would I do without you???
because like he's one of the only two people who shows that he loves jc. and of course jc doesn't know how to like, express love back, because his parents are awful, and it's constantly about looking good. any flaw is pounced on. so he hides it behind this aloof sardonic demeanor, and we see it later when he's constantly like, I'll break your legs to jin ling, and then jin ling is like, pft he's never even touched me
because it's that kind of just, I care about you so much and I don't know how to say it because I have been taught that openly expressing emotion is weakness and I have to shut the fuck up
so instead he hides everything behind this whole *scoffs* face. but you constantly see that he is totally loyal to wwx. he's so worried when he starts getting haunted. he doesn't understand why wwx, who always supported him, who SWORE that he would be his main disciple and main supporter, who would be the lan zhan to his lan xichen, is suddenly not carrying his sword and acting weird? and he's like, I have basically no power, our whole clan got murdered, I'm coasting on the lasting goodwill and good name of the jiang clan and doing my best, and you always had my back even with your sass and... suddenly you're cold to me? he disappears for three months
THREE MONTHS
HE IS SO WORRIED
he's looking everywhere along with lan zhan
they FIND HIM
he's obviously super haunted
but then jc HUGS HIM
which is this huge, like, he actually initiates physical contact
he breaks that aloofness because he is so happy and relieved
and wwx DOES NOT HUG BACK
LIKE
MY HEART BREAK
R: oh noooooh jesus
ME: so then the whole thing with the wen clan but like
R: :cries tears: oh no
ME: he's all okay so I betray you, and jc is like, but, you swore you'd be my guy. and at first it's like they are still in touch though right
R: yah like on the down low
ME: like, I can't protect you from other clans, so wwx is like okay we will say I left so that way the jiang clan doesn't get blamed for this. so wwx is still protecting jc
R: nrghg in the show that line is the worst I was just ack yes
ME: but jc doesn't really have the power to do anything to help him except support him secretly. like the whole thing where yanli is gonna have a baby and it was jc's idea to have wwx give him the courtesy name, but he doesn't want to admit it because again he just. can't. express emotion. because like imagine him trying to have an emotion at his parents. SHUT DOWN. so he's still just struggling to express anything to anyone really and this is another one of those gestures that he loves wwx. but then the super haunting happens right, and wen ning kills Jin Zixuan, and jc is like
YOU SAID YOU HAD IT UNDER CONTROL
and it's because he TRUSTED him totally, because wwx is his brother and loves him! but he has just hurt the one other person he loves, yanli
R: He's trying so hard to just keep a hold of him just a little oh my god
and he's always been this like...gosh flawed but also flawless?
ME: and he doesn't know what to do because the thing is he's always had faith in wwx's skills, he never would have thought that he would lie to him or betray him but now it's like, fucking haunted. murders the husband. then shows up and yanli gets killed. and yeah yanli dies actually protecting wwx but the thing is jc is like
YOU HAD
ONE JOB
PROTECT YANLI
because that's what they did as brothers. because that was like, their mom, you know???? like their affection mom??? so jc has lost his sister and also his brother, and has NO ONE
R: the one who actually made them food and gave them hugs T_T
ME: and of course he like, loses his shit and is like GO TO HELL because, his entire world has crumbled
R: yes T_T yes T_T of course
ME: he had two people to count on and one is dead and the other betrayed him by causing the other to die, by not having his back like he SWORE, and this is basically the only person who ever demonstrated that he was loved at all. if he doesn't have that what does he even have?
but like, IMMEDIATE regret
we hear about the constant hunting for his body, trying to summon his soul, the single minded dedication to finding him, because what's killing him is of course he regrets his part in wwx's death, but also - why? why did his brother, who he trusted more than anyone, who trusted HIM, who always believed in HIS skills, and HIS dedication, unlike his parents, who he was never good enough for, why did he betray him? like.... you know he's basically sitting there: was it something I did? was I not good enough for you?
you see it with the jealousy with lan zhan. you discarded me for the amazing hanguan jun? WHY AM I NEVER GOOD ENOUGH
and so he's obsessed with trying to get that closure. he Has To Know. and at the end he finally gets an answer. all the weird behavior, the haunting, not having the sword, going everywhere with wen ning as bodyguard - because wwx made the ultimate sacrifice for him - he gave him his golden core. and like, how could... how could anything ever compare to that
like he's crushed because that all happened because he gave himself up to save wwx, and got his core crushed, and was tortured, but he had to save his brother! THE ONLY FAMILY HE HAD LEFT. THE ONLY ONE WHO LOVED HIM. not to discount Yanli but... not the same. just not the same
so he's been sitting there this whole time going: I got my core crushed for you, I was tortured for you, I almost lost cultivation forever for you, and you threw me under the fucking bus, and then he finds out that no, he was good enough the whole time. like, what could wwx possibly give lan zhan that would ever top that, honestly? it's the ultimate affirmation that his relationship with jc WAS important and DID matter and he DID love him. and then he finally gets his apology for how wwx doesn't have his back and just, TEARS FOREVER
CRIES IN FRONT OF EVERYONE
FUCK ALL Y'ALL I AM GONNA HAVE AN EMOTION
and then does he tell wwx about how he got his core crushed? no. because it doesn't matter now. because all that matters is that he knows that wwx loved him. and for once, it's not a competition. he finally knows it's really, truly mutual
and even though there's all these years of bitterness and misunderstanding, like, suddenly he can look back and have the feeling of "he really never stopped loving me" and suddenly he's not so totally alone any more
R: Oh. *OH* I wondered why he didn't tell him.
ME: and NOW all I want is for him to give Jin Ling a goddamn hug
yeah if he told him... it would feel like that one-upmanship again. and I think that jc has finally realized he's good enough. and he doesn't need to do that
R: :flaps hands::flaps hands: it makes sense
ahh
that was the missing piece for me
oh gosh ahh
ME: GROWTH
R: growth!!!!!
ME: but yeah like, jc was literally just sitting there like, what the fuck, I would have died for you, I almost DID fucking die for you, and you turn around and won't wear a sword to support me so that we look like a strong united front with these other clan leaders?and yes, meng yao was right - he should have stood up for wwx and been like "yeah whatever he can do what he wants" instead of acting doubtful. but of course he was doubtful. does wwx even ever touch him after he comes back totally haunted? like definitely not in the same way. I'd have to go back and see
but he's sitting there like, I don't understand! and he can't express himself, and wwx doesn't help because EVERYTHING IS A FUCKING JOKE. WHEN IS HE SERIOUS. WHEN IS HE FUCKING SERIOUS
so jc is like... has it been a joke the whole time? have I been a joke to you the whole time? and that's the catharsis at the end - nope. not a joke. it was real. it was really, really real. you were right to love him and to trust him. all this bad shit, it's not like wwx is innocent, but it WASN'T him. he gets his apology, but more importantly he gets the affirmation that he's really loved and deserving and good enough. and that's like, what he needs the most
he's "parenting" jin ling this way because it's what his parents did to him and he became a good cultivator, so, like, yeah, but also because he wants everyone to know that jin ling is Good Enough, and this is the best way he knows how
SO
THOSE ARE SOME OF MY THOUGHTS
HOPE YOU ENJOYED
MARLOWE: So many feels T_T
Hug all these boys
R: oh gosh your thoughts are wonderful that moment at the end and he's just like 'ah' gnrghghg T_T
ME: RIGHT
like he just looks after wwx and lz, and thinks back, and has a little smile because like, no it was worth it
imagine how much that must have haunted him. like, "I got my core crushed for you! and you betrayed me! I should have let them take you!" but feeling SO TORN because how could he NOT protect his brother? and finally being able to feel okay with that decision for real
R: ahhh
:clutches heart:
MARLOWE: On the way home he spontaneously hugs Jin Ling
Who thinks he’s being strangled or murdered
ME: O_O
WUT IS HOPPEN
IS FINALLY TIME OF BREAKING LEGS X_X
MARLOWE: YES EXACTLY
Jin Ling’s spirit leaves his body
ME: yes
R: ahahaha just a little ghost right out his mouth
ME: then jc is all like
lets him go with a shove and scoffs
pft
let's go
stop standing there with your face like that
MARLOWE: T_T uncle
R: ahaha oh no
ME: but yes also jc cares like so so much and is just constantly doin his best
like yeah he's competitive and a perfectionist but also the jiang clan got wiped the fuck out and in "present" timeline it's still one of the four most powerful clans!he did that!he's harsh and arrogant but skilled and fiercely loyal and obviously cares about making sure that the jiang clan's reputation is as impeccable as possible and you can see how loyal its members are to him. like all these disciples aren't from nowhere. they all had to come in y'know? because so many were murdered by wen fucking chao. and as strict and harsh as he is like, I can just see him being an extremely dedicated teacher, doing his best to make every cultivator in his sect as good as possible
unlike certain assholes who may have totally deserved death by gangbang
MARLOWE: what
ME: what?
MARLOWE: that took a sudden turn
ME: jin guanshan or whatever is a douche fuck that guy
if we're talking clan leaders
just saying
R: XD
MARLOWE: OHHHH
ok i'm back on board all is clear
ME: did you forget
about
death by gangbang
because it's a Real Plot Point
R: OH
THAT GUY
OH MY GOD
MARLOWE: I JUST WANSN'T EXPECTING 'DEATH BY GANGBANG' AS A SUDDEN TURN IN YOUR DEBATE POINT
R: :cackling:
MARLOWE: passionate and thoughtful defense of jiang cheng's virtues as a sect leader
unlike some people and their death by gangbang
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mewbrilysis · 4 years
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MDZS Jiang Cheng Character Ending Analysis (Novel/Drama Spoilers) - BY BRI >v<
If I asked you to change the ending of mdzs, without completely impacting the actual plot, by removing one character from the story, who would you choose? Obviously, removing any major character would change the story completely, and removing a character post-reincarnation wouldn’t affect enough to change anything, since most of the cultivational world would still despise and fear Wei Wuxian, which is an important plot point. Nie Huiasang and Mo Xuanyu also carry a major role, since they are the catalysts for the post-reincarnation storyline. So now you may be considering minor characters pre-reincarnation, such as one of the clan leaders or a sibling such as Lan Xichen or Jiang Yanli. These answers, granted, would change the storyline, but they wouldn’t result in much of a better ending, if a good ending at all.
In my opinion, the sole reason mdzs arguably has a very bittersweet ending (one that leaves some readers with a sense of unfulfillment) is: Madame Yu.
The saddest part about the ending of mdzs is arguably the lost friendship between Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian. The story begins with them as brothers and ends with Jiang Cheng being the cause for Wei Wuxian’s death during the siege of Yiling (novel pre-reincarnation ending). One of the things that makes mdzs so captivating is trying to discover why this happened (a plot point the drama highlights more than the novel). Before diving into why Madame Yu impacts this story so much, let’s review some important aspects of Jiang Cheng’s and Wei Wuxian’s character.
Jiang Cheng is born with an older sister and is destined to become a clan leader one day. At a young age, a young boy is adopted by his family and they spark a friendship. However, as they grow up, it is noticeable how different the two are. Wei Wuxian is mischievous and seeks danger and adventure, he doesn’t like listening to rules that he finds too strict or unnecessary, and he has a habit of exploiting qualities people are shy about so he can tease them about it later (good-heartedly, of course, but something that is clearly bound to get him in some trouble). Jiang Cheng, however, is more serious and respectful with a habit of joining Wei Wuxian in causing trouble, after all, he is a teenager (and the Lan Clan rules weren’t going to stop a group of teenage boys, lmao, let’s be honest).
They are obviously very close, something that the Donghua seemed to focus on a bit better than the drama. However, it is also noticeable that he gets treated differently from Wei Wuxian when it comes to punishments. There are several points that explicitly suggest that Wei Wuxian tends to receive lesser punishments from Jiang Fengmian compared to Jiang Cheng (something Madame Yu likes to bring up every argument). Jiang Fengmian also seems to praise Wei Wuxian more than his own son, and seems to compare the two more than he should (such as when he reprimands Jiang Cheng for encouraging Wei Wuxian to think selfishly about his survival rather than the lives of others). And so, Jiang Cheng has something plaguing him: inferiority. It is arguable by some people that he has an inferiority complex; after all, despite being the next clan leader, he is not head disciple and pretty much always falls short of Wei Wuxian.
However, I offer another theory: he hates being humiliated. Yes, a quality that pretty much every person on the face of the planet has. Yes, I am saying this is the underlying cause of why everything else happens.
The reason I say this is because Jiang Cheng doesn’t seem to care that Wei Wuxian succeeds, but rather that he himself doesn’t receive the same recognition when he does something similar. When Wei Wuxian along with Lan Wangji defeated the Tortoise of Slaughter, Jiang Cheng isn’t particularly mad that Wei Wuxian killed the tortoise, but rather his words reflect: 1) worry, and 2) anger at himself. He was mad because Wei Wuxian, someone who he clearly sees as a brother figure, put himself in danger because he wanted to save people, and not just in any danger, but a life-or-death situation. Jiang Cheng makes it clear that he spent days without rest or break running to get help so that he could get back to Wei Wuxian as fast as possible, even while injured from the fights with the Wen Clan, who guarded the outside of the cave and attacked everyone who escaped thanks to Wei Wuxian’s efforts (novel scene); he even passed out the second he found people to help. Yet, when they went to save Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji, everyone only praised their valiance in defeating the Tortoise of Slaughter, and Jiang Cheng’s actions were overlooked.
So, why did he get so mad at himself about this? BECAUSE OF HIS HEADASS MOM, DUH, I’VE BEEN LEADING YOU TO THIS CONCLUSION!!
Imagine, you are next in line to be clan leader, yet you aren’t head disciple, and now your mother is breathing down the back of your neck because your father is praising someone who is doing better than you. On top of this, you don’t even have the chance to speak to your father about how you feel upset that he treats you differently, because every time the topic of your father being more strict and less praising of you comes up, your mother takes the reigns and doesn’t give you the chance to speak for yourself. Now, all of a sudden, your mother is yelling at your father, saying he doesn’t love his own son and he prefers your adopted brother, and she is also yelling at your adopted brother because he is better than you, and all this is happening IN FRONT OF YOUR EYES ALL. THE. TIME!!
After putting that into perspective, are we really surprised Jiang Cheng turned out the way he did? This entire ordeal must have been HUMILIATING for him, and you KNOW it happened all the time.
Jiang Cheng grew up with this happening, and Jiang Fengmian was only stricter with him because he was going to be a clan leader, and, granted, we can all acknowledge that Jiang Cheng said some shit that his dad was justified in reprimanding him for (such as the whole thing where he told Wei Wuxian he never should have put the lives of others over himself and their clan). Of course, we should also acknowledge that Jiang Fengmian had his faults, and he should have been stricter with Wei Wuxian. As much as we all love this mischievous boi, he was the head disciple of the Jiang Clan and was far too undisciplined and unruly for the position he represented, especially while he was a disciple at Gusu and during the Archery Competition hosted by the Wen Clan (novel scene). And for real, the shit he told Lan Qiren when he asked about why Wei Wuxian was like this, this boy really replied, “It’s just the way he has always been.” That type of response wouldn’t even pass in modern era!
Of course, after all this, Jiang Cheng was going to hold some resentment for Wei Wuxian.
However, the real kicker is Madame Yu’s final words before she sends Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian away… THE WOMAN TAKES A GOOD FEW MINUTES TO JUST STRAIGHT UP YELL AT WEI WUXIAN AND BLAME HIM FOR EVERYTHING!! LIKE WTF!! Look, I’m sorry, MAAM, but the Wens were kind of trying to take over the entire cultivational world, I promise you that Wei Wuxian’s existence affected that all of zero percent. She said that he was the cause for the fall of Lotus Pier, but let’s consider how, oh yeah, LITERALLY EVERY CLAN WITHIN 100+ MILES OR SOMETHING OF THE WEN CLAN WERE INVADED AND FORCED INTO SUBMISSION NOT THAT LONG AFTER; THEY WERE GONNA DO THIS NO MATTER WHAT!! Sure, the Wens may have decided to go after Lotus Pier a bit early because they hated Wei Wuxian, but it’s not as if him not being there was going to stop any of this…? They literally went after GusuLan first, I don’t understand how Wei Wuxian can be faulted for any of this.
But, of course, Jiang Cheng is not here to listen to reason, he just lost both his parents, and years of lowkey (highkey) verbal abuse finally caught up, especially since some of his mother’s last words were blaming Wei Wuxian for everything. This is the start of our downhill slope.
I would like to take a moment and review how Jiang Cheng really received no closure with his father. His father died before Jiang Cheng ever got the chance to speak for himself and just communicate with him, and after all the arguments his mother had with him, it is clear that Jiang Cheng will always carry a part of him that believes his father didn’t truly love him.
But this is something the reader can view as misjudgment. His mother seemed to use Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian as a way to argue with Jiang Fengmian, and in Jiang Cheng’s eyes, this may be viewed as his mother standing up for him; however, looking at this as a whole, the situation isn’t so straight-forward. Quite honestly, it is hard to even tell whether Madame Yu loved Jiang Cheng, or whether she just wanted a reason to argue with Jiang Fengmian. There are points in the story that say Madame Yu ‘forced’ (I use this term loosely, but this is the term the rumors seemed to hover around) Jiang Fengmian into a marriage, and this may be her way of consistently reminding him that “You can’t leave, you have a child to raise.” If anyone has the inferiority complex, I think it can be argued that Madame Yu likely has a slight case of it. BUT! The point is that Jiang Cheng viewed his mother as “the only one on his side,” in a sense, even his own sister fought tooth and nail to be able to see Wei Wuxian even when he was shunned by the cultivational world.
Now, Wei Wuxian doesn’t exactly help his case when he turns down the path of demonic cultivation.
We all know the reason he did it, and many may argue that Jiang Cheng is a fool for thinking for even a moment that BaoShan Sanran could return his golden core, let me remind you of this:
BaoShan Sanran is very mysterious, no one really knows anything about her other than that she has reached “Enlightenment” (a term derived from Buddhism to describe someone who has found the truth of life and no longer is reborn). She is described in the book to be viewed as “immortal” and once a disciple leaves her mountain, they are forbidden from returning. The only people who know anything about BaoShan Sanran are the disciples, and even the ones that have left the mountain don’t spread much information on her. So, in essence, everyone just knows she is powerful and not to mess with her. So, please, excuse Jiang Cheng for having even a shrivel of hope. I am positive that, in his mind, being able to ‘re-grow’ your golden core was just as possible as being able to ‘trade’ you golden core (both of which he believed to be outside the realm of possibility, so yeah, both sounded insane, but he had hope, and no one suggested that ‘trading’ was even an option, so ‘re-growing’ was already mind-boggling).  So, Jiang Cheng is happy because he has his golden core back, but when he goes searching for his brother, the man is gone and no where to be found for three full months, and when he does reappear, he is using demonic cultivation and is more closed-off.
Jiang Cheng has gone through the literal worst whiplash of emotions in his life: his parents and entire sect were all brutally slaughtered; he lost his golden core; he got his golden core back, but his brother was no where to be found; his brother is back, but he is using demonic cultivation and won’t discuss the reason with him.
Now, this is where the past ‘abuse’ catches up with Jiang Cheng. He has now been forced into a leadership position in the middle of a war, and now the war is over, but his brother is still…yeah. But now, the other clans are talking and saying that he should be reprimanding Wei Wuxian, but no matter how he tries, the man doesn’t listen to him. This is, no doubt, HUMILIATING for Jiang Cheng, especially when all the other clans are constantly saying he needs to take action against Wei Wuxian because the man was becoming ‘too arrogant’ and etc. When Wei Wuxian finally stands up for the remaining Wens, Jiang Cheng is so humiliated that he didn’t want to stand up for his brother because he knew he would be shunned the same if he stood by Wei Wuxian’s side, especially since it would be as an ally and not the leader in this movement. This is the ‘herd mentality,’ in which the few vocal people in the room speak up for an argument, creating a big fuss, and even though the majority actually agrees for the other side of the argument, everyone remains quiet against this front, making it seem (and, in term, making them believe) that they are the minority and should just stay quiet. It was obvious that the Lans, Nies, and Jiangs all didn’t agree with how the Wens were being treated, but with how loud the Jin clan and co. were, they didn’t want to say anything, especially when they were all still weak and rebuilding after the war. Then, the clans started encouraging Jiang Cheng to go and act against Wei Wuxian and, fueled by the humiliation of not being able to control his subordinate, that’s exactly what he did.
I would also like to point out that Jiang Cheng only ever listened to the information the other clans were feeding him in regards to Wei Wuxian, he never actually knew what was true like we, the readers, do.
AND NOW, this is why I say Madame Yu has ruined Jiang Cheng. Let’s say that she had died a year prior to the entire war. Jiang Cheng wouldn’t have her final words in his head blaming Wei Wuxian for everything; he likely would have been able to reconnect with his father and speak for himself; he would have grown closer to Wei Wuxian without his mother breathing down his neck and would go a full year without hearing an argument about why he was inferior to Wei Wuxian.
In every story, there is a ‘climax.’ In a long story like this, there can be many ‘climaxes’ especially when it comes to different characters. A climax is defined as ‘the point in the story where one decision can change the course of the rest of the book,’ or ‘the decision that alters the ending,’ as my AP English Literature teacher defines it. For Jiang Cheng, the point in the book that alters his ending is the moment he decides to trust the clans over his brother, something that makes him so clearly different from Jiang Yanli.
Yanli never stops believing in Wei Wuxian, even to her dying breath she cared for him and believed he was good. This is from the perspective of someone who literally only knew what was going on based on hearsay, never seeing Wei Wuxian and speaking with him about this. She just knew nothing was as it was told.
I truly believe that if Madame Yu had fucked off a cliff or something before the war, Jiang Cheng could’ve been just like Yanli and would have sat down and given Wei Wuxian a chance to explain his side of the story. He may have even fought alongside Wei Wuxian, because now he wouldn’t be worried about “glory” like his mother egged him to believe, but rather, he would believe more in his father’s belief that they should stand for “justice” for all people. Wei Wuxian likely would have still died, but maybe seeing the Jiang Clan fight alongside Wei Wuxian could have inspired the Lan Clan or Nie Clan to also stand with them. Imagine THAT ending, an ending in which Wei Wuxian stood alongside his brother to fight for the innocent, allying with the Lan Clan and Nie Clan against the Jin Clan, and then they win and Wei Wuxian wouldn’t have even had to die and he could’ve just gotten married to Lan Wangji right then and there and save us all the angst 200k fanfiction. LMAO, I actually think Jiang Cheng might’ve still kept his mouth shut in front of the clans, but lowkey stood up for him, and then maybe Wei Wuxian would die a different way, not by Jiang Cheng’s hand. Then he would return and everything would go as usual, but this time :((((((( Jiang Cheng is happy to see him :((((((((( and he raised Jin Ling :(((((((( like Lan Wangji raised Lan Sizhui (yeah, I think the Wens would encourage him to train him under GusuLan) :((((((((( and Jin Ling would be happy to see Wei Wuxian :((((((( and so would Lan Sizhui because he would already know he is a Wen and was raised a bit by Wei Wuxian :(((((((((( and happily ever after ;-;
You can argue that this is a reach, but I don’t think it is at all. Mo Xiang Tong Xiu (novel author) created a character that was so terrible, she single-handedly ruined the ending for her own son.
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