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stardewlegends · 2 years

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[Part 1] The Day After The Day Before | Sebastian x Reader, Platonic!Sam x Reader (Angst, Fluff)

Category: Angst, Fluff (Mandatory) Age: 18+ Trigger Warnings: Implied non-con, sexual assault, physical violence, blood, mention of abortion, forced pregnancy, implied smut, mention of STIs Ship: Sebastian x Reader, Platonic!Sam x Reader Summary: She'd heard so many good things about her best friend, Sam's, father, Kent, and it was true, he was lovely! Right up until he wasn't. How was she meant to tell Sebastian? Sam? The answer is simple: she couldn't. But apparently she couldn't hide it either. Request: N/A Contains Spoilers for: N/A Word Count: 8.7k

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She hasn’t slept. Perhaps the momentary concussion she had four hours earlier was the best she’s gonna get for a long while.

How was she meant to sleep after what that man- no. He’s no man. He’s a fucking monster.

Sweetheart, Army soldier back home in the heart of Pelican Town. A man missed by all. Adored. Sam looked up to him like he was an actual God walking the Earth.

Fucking. Bullshit.

She wants to say she didn’t deserve it - nobody deserves it - but his words got to her. Crawled into her veins and planted seeds everywhere in her body. They’re growing. Destroying her from the inside out.

*** Flashback ***

“Hey, you’re the new farmer girl, right?” A new voice catches her attention away from the sports show playing on the TV in the corner of the saloon.

“Hey, yeah, that’s me, (Y/N).” She holds out her hand for the handsome gent to shake. He accepts.

“Pleasure to meet you. I’m Kent, Jodi’s husband.” He greets, a charming smile on his lips.

“Ah! Sam and Vincent’s dad, right? Nice! I’ve heard a lot about you.” Her smile is contagious. Kent laughs at her words.

“All good things I hope!”

“Most certainly; those boys look up to you.” Her words make him bashful.

“I just hope I can do them proud.”

“I’m sure you will. It’s a pleasure to meet you anyway; Sam and I are good friends so don’t be surprised if you see me around.”

“Likewise, (Y/N).”

That was Monday night, it’s now Friday. Sam, Sebastian, Abigail and (Y/N) are all around the pool table, Seb kicking Sam’s ass as per usual.

She had a plan to get home early that night, knowing the majority of her crops are going to be ready for harvesting tomorrow, she wanted to get an early start so she had time to make it into the mines for some gold ore. Clint would never let it go if she forgot to upgrade her pickaxe for the fourth time that month.

“I’m going to head off, boys and girls, that farm doesn’t look after itself.” She announces, grabbing her small wallet and phone from the small table beside her and Abby.

“Aw! But (Y/N), it’s so early!”

“Pft, it’s almost your bedtime, Samson.”

“Fuck off, Sebby.”

The boys bicker whilst Abigail and (Y/N) roll their eyes.

“See you later, kids.”

“Bye, (Y/N)!”

“Cya, farmer.”

“Goodnight, doll.”

She throws her best evils at Sebastian for still giving her the nickname ‘doll’ from the one time she wore make-up and he told her she looked like a Barbie doll. It was meant as a compliment. She took it - makes her giggle really.

Whilst she had a plan to get home early that night, little did she know about a certain soldier’s plan that neatly accommodated hers.

She didn’t notice all the ways in which he had been watching her this last week. She stayed over at Sam’s on Wednesday night along with Sebastian; their band practice went on a little late. She went to the bathroom around three AM and she missed him being wide away on the sofa. He was trying to sleep but couldn’t, so tried the living room. She was prancing around in one of Sebastian’s t-shirts and a skimpy pair of underwear underneath, what was he meant to do? She was practically begging for his stare.

Back to that night, it was when she was passing the Doctor’s that she heard a call of her name. She spun around and saw Kent jogging toward her.

“Hey, farmer, what brings you out and about at this time of night?” He greets, an honest smile on his lips.

Little did she know.

“Hey, Kent. I’m just heading home from the saloon - Sam comes out with Abby, Seb and I every Friday night for some pool games.” She smiles. He replicates it.

“Ah, nice! I’m glad he’s got a solid group of friends, although I bet he still sucks at the game.”

(Y/N)’s laugh echoes.

“No kidding; Seb always kicks his ass.”

“I bet. Anyway, I was just heading home but please, let me walk you back? I wouldn’t feel right letting a young woman walk alone at night.” He offers.

She’s convinced their entire family are just the nicest people to walk the Earth.

“Bless you, Kent, in a town like this one there’s really nothing to be afraid of, but if it’ll give you peace of mind then you’re welcome to join me.”

“Thank you, sweetheart. So, are you enjoying the valley?”

“Oh, definitely! It’s so much nicer out here compared to the city. What about you? Have you missed home?”

“Totally agree with you. It’s so relaxing and peaceful out here. It’s beautiful.”

“Yeah.”

They walk in comfortable silence, Kent complimenting how organised the farm is once they arrive at its field. She chuckles.

“Yeah. It’s hard work but I think it’s looking pretty good so far.”

“The hard work shows and definitely pays off.”

“Thanks!”

She unlocks the cottage door and spins around to wish the man goodbye, but that’s the last movement she makes before a sudden dulling on the back of her neck and a faint: “sorry, sweetheart.” is heard.

*** Flashback End ***

He didn’t stop until maybe four-AM. It’s now six-thirty. She’s not sure how she’s meant to continue with her day as usual. Her life.

How the hell is she supposed to leave the farm at the risk of seeing him again? At the risk of seeing Jodi? Vincent? Sam- fuck.

Sam. Abigail.

Sebastian.

*** Flashback ***

She hadn’t noticed Sebastian’s eyes being more focused on her than the anime they were watching. Some horror that the boy had been persuading her to watch for months. She decided not to torment him for much longer.

“You’re beautiful.”

The words catch her off-guard. Eyes widening and looking at her best friend with astonishment, but he’s simply staring at her like she’s an angel sent from Heaven itself.

“Sorry?”

“I said you’re beautiful.” He repeats without hesitation.

“Where’s that come from?”

“Does it have to come from anywhere? I just want you to know it.”

There’s no doubt that she’s attracted to Sebastian. Hell, he’s so perfectly her type it’s unreal, but she basked in the friendship they had, never daring to act impulsively at the risk of destroying that.

Sebastian realises she’s getting all up in her head again, as she’s good at, and simply chuckles, leaning over and tucking a stray hair behind her ear.

“(Y/N), can I kiss you?” He asks, his voice as relaxing as it always is.

Reminds her of the time he calmed her down when she was caught up in a storm after leaving the mines. He was basking in the weather, having a smoke up by the mountain lake and saw her panicking as she crossed the wooden bridge toward his home.

There’s no judgement in his voice; he’s asking her as if asking her favourite colour. If she said no, he’d be fine. He would just nod and move on. He wouldn’t hold it against her. But, God, as if she’d ever say no to him kissing her. She’s wanted a whole load more than kisses for all the years they’ve been friends.

Her words fail her so she simply nods, eyes glistening with anticipation. Sebastian sees it and smirks, resting a hand on her cheek before leaning in and pressing a soft kiss to her lips.

“You’re so very beautiful, (Y/N) (L/N).”

“Seb…” She doesn’t know what to say, but she knows exactly what it is she wants.

He must know too. No doubt based on the desperation in her voice.

Another smirk on his lips, his thumb sliding down her cheek to slide across her lower lip.

“What’s up, doll?”

“Fuck,” She didn’t really mean to say it out loud but he chuckles.

“What do you want, pretty girl?”

“Kiss me.”

“I just did.”

“Again, please,”

He complies. Another soft one. Barely there. But she grabs onto his black tee and pulls him closer, their lips colliding again. And again. And again.

She’s laying flat on her back in his single bed, Seb straddling her and not taking his lips off of her for a second. He’s kissing down her jaw, down her neck, painting her collarbone in neverending invisible lip prints.

“Fuck,” It seems to be the only word she can remember. “Seb,” An improvement, she supposes.

“Yeah, doll?”

“Please,” She’s begging.

She knows what for.

He knows what for.

But he won’t give it to her that easy.

“Please what?”

Her gaze meets his and she’s silently pleading. He smirks and kisses her. Hard. Not like the soft kisses he began with. No. He’s dominating her with his lips and tongue alone.

“Sebby, please,”

“I told you, baby: please, what?” He murmurs, grinding his clothed core, and prominent bulge, into her own.

“Oh, fuck,” She’s moaning already and the man’s barely touched her yet. “Seb, need you inside me.”

“Yeah? Want me to make you feel good, (Y/N)?”

“Please!”

“Anything for you, pretty girl.”

*** Flashback End ***

That was just under a year ago. Since then, the pair have been friends with benefits - and being friends with Sebastian comes with a lot of benefits.

They discussed their feelings one day, whether or not they were gonna, if they hadn’t already, fall in love with one another. They both confessed that they already did love each other platonically, and right now they’re happy to be casual.

But fuck.

How is she meant to tell him? Or Sam? He’s Kent’s fucking pride and joy, for goodness sakes. She can’t tell them. She won’t. It’s not fair on Sam. It’s not fair at all. The boy waited years for his father to come back from the army. She won’t tear that away from him.

So she doesn’t.

She puts on a front.

She pretends everything is fine.

Until six weeks later when she’s left alone with Sebastian.

“See you guys tomorrow or something!” Sam calls as he leaves Sebastian’s room following their gaming session.

“See you, man.”

“Bye, Sam!”

The woman is immediately grabbing her belongings and putting them into her bag as she prepares to head off herself, not comfortable being alone with another man at the moment.

“Hey, you heading off so soon?” Sebastian’s voice fills her ears, the man coming up behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist.

She tenses up. No. She absolutely freezes.

Sebastian notices. Obviously.

“You okay?” He loosens his hold on her.

“Yeah, sorry, I’ve just got a load of work to be getting on with at the farm. Season end and all that.” She attempts to look at him and force a smile but his expression falls.

He’s not stupid. She knows he’s not. Which is exactly why she needs to leave.

“What’s going on, (Y/N)?”

“What? Nothing, I’ve just got about one-thousand blueberries to harvest tomorrow morning. I didn’t check the ‘shrooms this morning either, and I think I forgot to sell my oranges, which is as careless as ever of me.” A forced laugh.

Sebastian remains silent for a short moment as she finishes throwing her shit in her bag.

“(Y/N)-”

“I’ll see you tomorrow with Sam and Abby, right?” She interrupts, heading toward the door and glancing at him in an attempt to make herself seem less suspicious.

“(Y/N),” He grabs her wrist, lightly, barely even a grab, but she shrieks.

The woman yanks her body away from him, stumbling into his bedroom wall. A few figures fall from a shelf beside her.

“(Y/N)...” His eyes are wide. He looks traumatised. She does too.

She’s staring at the man. She knows him. It’s Sebastian, for God’s sake. He’d never lay a harmful finger on fucking anybody.

“I’ve gotta go.” It’s barely a whisper. He hears the break in her voice. She does too.

She doesn’t wait. She leaves, grateful that she dodges the rest of his family on her way out.

She all but sprints home, down the back path from the mountains to the top of the farm where no one would see or hear her. She screams. She’s sobbing and screaming as loud and as hard as she can.

She wants to be normal.

She wants to be tucked in bed with Sebastian as he calls her every possible name under the sun that makes her feel invincible. He makes her feel indescribably wanted and loved. He looks after her. Makes her feel safe.

He’s always made her feel safe.

So why is she running from him? Why isn’t she staying with him?

Why won’t she let him touch her?

She slams her cottage door shut, locking in, before running to her bed and continuing her break down.

She wants to be normal.

She wishes she never fucking met him.

///

A knocking. Loud. Shouting. What the hell?

“(Y/N)! Open up!”

Sam?

The woman looks around and realises she’s still in the same clothes as yesterday. She’s lying on her bed. Must’ve passed out.

She gulps and quickly attempts to straighten out her hair before heading toward her door that’s still being bashed in.

“Alright, alright!” She calls, opening the wood and widening her eyes at the sight of her three best friends. “What the hell, guys? What time is it?”

Sam doesn’t answer, simply strides into her house, Abigail and Sebastian following.

“(Y/N), don’t bullshit us: has someone hurt you?”

Her eyes widen at Sam’s question, the seriousness in his voice and anger in his eyes tells her she’s not getting out of this.

She glances at Abigail who looks worried before looking at Sebastian who… his expression is unreadable.

Her eyes meet Sam’s once more.

“What are you talking about?”

“Cut the bullshit.” Sebastian’s voice almost frightens her. He sounds like he’s ready to kill. “You’re our best friend. You’re the woman I love. I know when someone’s wrong.”

The sudden confession catches her off-guard.

“(Y/N), what’s going on?” Abigail sounds timid. Scared. (Y/N) knows she will have tried persuading the boys that they’re overthinking or overreacting.

She wishes they were.

“It’s okay, I’m fine, really.”

“(Y/N), I’m really fucking riled up so I’d really appreciate the truth right about now.” Sam states, staring at her.

She can see the conflict of worry yet anger in his bright blue eyes.

“I can’t.” She can feel herself breaking. Her head shakes and her eyes stare at the floor.

“Can’t what?” Sebastian’s voice once again.

The tears are falling before she can even try to stop them.

“Please,” It’s a beg. A plea.

She looks up at Sebastian and singles him out.

The boy knows (Y/N) inside and out. He knows she’s begging him to drop it but he can’t. Not when she’s like this. He’s seen her cry, sure, but this isn’t sadness. This is trauma.

“Talk to us.” He simply states. It’s as reassuring as he can be.

“(Y/N),” Abby begins, capturing the woman’s attention once more. “Did someone hurt you?”

She’s scared of what she can and can’t say, and she knows that she’s got no choice anymore.

Her head shakes, but then nods, but then shakes. She stops and shrugs.

“(Y/N),” Sebastian’s turn. She doesn’t look at him. She knows what’s coming. “Did someone… touch you?”

Her eyes clench shut and an uncontrollable sob escapes her throat. Her arms are hugging herself in an attempted protective shield from anyone and everyone.

“Who?” Sam’s voice. Tense. Full of rage.

She doesn’t react nor respond.

“(Y/N), who the fuck touched you?” He repeats his question.

She shakes her head this time and looks up, bright red, tearful eyes meeting his raging glare.

“Baby,” Sebastian’s voice is calmer. She looks at him again.

The boy takes a cautious step toward the woman as if she’s a deer in their headlights.

“It’s okay.” He begins, eyes softer. “You’re gonna be okay, I promise, but you’ve got to tell us what’s happened.”

Her lips are trembling. Hell, her entire body is. Arms are still wrapped around herself.

She shakes her head again.

“I can’t.”

“Yes, you can.”

Another desperate shake of her head.

“Do we know them?” Sam’s voice asks but she keeps her eyes on Sebastian’s reassuring ones.

They’re safe.

They protect her.

“(Y/N), do we fucking know them!?” Sam’s yelling now, the woman flinching.

“Sammy, shush!” Abigail lightly slaps the boy.

“Sam, shut the fuck up.” Sebastian warns. “(Y/N), do we know who they are? Are they local?”

She takes a moment but eventually manages a tiny nod.

Sebastian takes another cautious step toward her, hands out in front of him for her to hold any time she feels ready to.

“Okay. Was it a man? Or woman?” He asks, watching her face contort with pain as she tries to avoid answering. “Man?” Sebastian prompts, realising that giving the woman yes/no questions was getting better results.

She nods. A tiny one.

“Did they touch you without your permission?”

Another sob. Louder.

Sebastian’s heart is cracking with every answer he receives from the woman. She’s the best fucking thing that ever happened to him, and yet something happened to her and he wasn’t fucking there to stop it.

“(Y/N), answer the question.” Sam warns. Abigail lightly slaps him again. “I’m gonna lose my fuckin’ shit.”

“Baby,” Sebastian coos, keeping her attention on him rather than the raging blond staring her down.

His anger isn’t directed at her though. It would never be directed at her, so he thought.

“Did they touch you without your permission?”

Another nod. He steps closer again.

“Okay.” Sebastian pauses and takes a deep breath trying to keep his composure.

He’s beyond upset and livid at whoever has caused his girl to feel the way she is, but he needs to put her first. He failed to save her the first time, he won’t do it again.

“I’m going to explicitly ask this question and I need you to be honest with me, doll,” The pet name was natural but accidental. “Did they rape you?”

She can’t.

Her knees buckle and a scream rips from her throat.

Sam’s eyes are wide, fists clenched. He’s crying but his face is stoic. Abby has her hands over her dropped jaw, trembling slightly.

Sebastian dashes the remaining distance between himself and the woman, dropping to his knees with her and wrapping his arms around her body.

“It’s okay, baby, it’s okay. It’s okay, (Y/N), I got you. I’ve got you.” He’s crying. Everyone is fucking crying. “Can you look at me, doll?”

Truth is, Sam and Abigail have never seen the two so intimate, they usually kept it behind closed doors, but they realise now just how strong their relationship was, despite not being labelled.

She manages, Sebastian taking her shaking hands in his own and giving her a reassuring smile, despite both their tears.

“Right here, right now, you’re safe, okay? I promise you, you’re safe.” He tells her, watching her whimper as she fails to believe his words. “I need you to tell me who did this to you, (Y/N). They can’t get away with it.”

She’s hyperventilating. She can’t do this. It’s over. She’s ruined everything.

“(Y/N)!” Her eyes meet Sebastian’s once again and she’s trying so hard.

The name is on the tip of her tongue. She can do it. She’ll be okay. It’s the right thing to do.

But her eyes flicker toward the blond across the room and she remembers how fucking angry he is.

Sebastian notices.

“Don’t worry about him, he’s just worried about you. We all are. (Y/N), you’re our best friend, we want to fucking punish whoever did this to you, okay?”

“You can’t.” Her words get lost in a whimper but he hears them.

“Why can’t we?”

She stares him out as Sebastian is simply searching her eyes in desperation for the answer.

Her mouth moves in an attempt to say it. He watches her lips for all options, not wanting to miss it.

“Because it’s Sam’s dad.”

She holds her breath. She’s pretty sure everyone else has too.

She stares at Sebastian as if he’s keeping her breathing. You could hear a pin drop, despite the wind and animal noises surrounding the cottage.

“What?” Sam breaks the silence first. She still refuses to look at him.

She doesn’t answer.

Sebastian is still staring at her. She can’t read his expression.

“Bullshit.” Sam spits, her eyes widening as she turns to look at him.

Sure, she expected him to be pissed, but is he actually accusing her of…

“Absolute fucking bullshit.”

(Y/N) feels Sebastian tense up.

“Sam-” She attempts, but is interrupted.

“You’re a fucking liar!” The blond storms toward the woman, her eyes widening, but Sebastian abruptly stands up and grabs the boy by the collar of his white tee.

“Back, the fuck, off.” The black-haired warns his best friend.

“She’s fucking lying.”

Sebastian remains silent for a moment, keeping a tight hold on Sam whilst (Y/N) remains curled up on her knees behind him.

“You and I know full well she fucking wouldn’t.”

Sam doesn’t respond, simply stares into the depths of Sebastian’s eyes before glancing at the woman behind him.

“When would he have ever fucking been alone with her, huh? Fucking tell me!” Sam yells, (Y/N) flinching and whimpering.

“Sammy, calm dow-”

“DON’T FUCKING TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!” Abigail jumps back at her friend’s outburst.

“If you give the girl a God damn fucking second to explain, maybe we’d have the answers you’re looking for,” Sebastian states, Sam looking like he’s ready to swing a punch. “Sit the fuck down.” He adds, shoving the blond toward the sofa.

The dark-haired boy turns around and crouches down to (Y/N)’s level once again.

“You okay?” He whispers, hand reaching up, hesitantly, to stroke her cheek. She leans into the touch.

She knows Sebastian would never let anything hurt her if he could. She knows that, especially after that shit show.

She shakes her head, attempting a comedic smile but he simply sighs.

“Do you think you can tell us about what happened?”

She glances a cautious look at Sam who’s still staring her down with wide, fury-filled eyes. The wooden floor seems nicer to look at. Less threatening.

“It was six weeks ago; the night I left the saloon early to go prepare for the end of Spring.” Her voice is quiet but she’s honest.

“Six fucking weeks!?” Sam yells, Sebastian glaring at him to keep his mouth shut.

“Ken- He kinda appeared from nowhere, but I know he likes to chill outside when it’s dark so I thought nothing of it.” Her breaths are unstable. She’s shaking. Sebastian gently takes one of her hands and squeezes it. “He offered to walk me home, said he didn’t feel comfortable letting a young girl walk alone at night.”

“Yeah, no shit, because he’s a good fucking guy!”

“Sam, I’m gonna knock you the fuck out in a minute. Shut the fuck up.” Sebastian seethes, glaring daggers at the man.

It shuts him up this time because he believes the words coming from his friend’s lips.

“Keep going, doll.”

She takes a deep breath and nods.

“As I unlocked the door and went to say goodbye, I just felt pain on the back of my neck and blacked out. I don’t know how much later it was when I woke up to him…” She trails off, a sob pouring from her lips.

Sebastian tilts his head back and stares at the blank ceiling of the cottage, taking deep breaths to keep himself from reacting too hard to anything that’s happened.

“Why didn’t you say anything, (Y/N)?” Abby’s timid voice questions.

(Y/N) eyes up Sam.

“Because of him. It’s not fair. I’m sorry.”

The blond doesn’t respond this time.

“You have absolutely nothing to apologise for,” Sebastian whispers.

Her eyes meet his once again. He’s crying his absolute heart out but no sounds escape him.

“I should’ve walked you home.”

(Y/N) desperately shakes her head.

“You can’t do that to yourself, Sebby. It’s not your fault.”

“I love you.”

She nods, crawling into his arms and sitting in his lap.

“I love you so much, doll, and I’m sorry this happened to you.”

“(Y/N),” Sam’s voice prompts her to tense up.

She leans back from Sebastian’s embrace and meets his intense stare

“Swear to me that you’re telling the truth. Don’t fuck with me. Tell me that every detail you’ve just listed is the God's honest truth.”

Her face contorts as a sob escapes her again.

She simply nods, desperately.

“I don’t want it to be true.”

He stands up abruptly and storms out.

“I’ll fucking kill him.”

“Sam!” Abby screams.

Sebastian’s eyes widen and he quickly lifts (Y/N) off of himself.

“I’ll be back for you, I promise.” He holds her face in his hands and she nods.

A kiss to her forehead, a passing message to Abby to look after her, before he’s sprinting out after Sam.

The blond must’ve been sprinting because Sebastian has already lost track of him. He runs as fast as he can down to their house, seeing the door left wide open and running into the doorway, just in time to see Sam grab his father and slam him against the wall by his throat.

“TELL ME IT’S NOT TRUE!”

Jodi comes dashing into the living room, eyes wide and the sight of her usually sweet son in such a state of fury. She glances at Sebastian for any answers but the moment his eyes lay on the soldier, his morals have long gone.

“TELL ME IT’S FUCKING BULLSHIT. TELL ME SHE WAS FUCKING CONFUSED!” Another slam into the wall. Kent doesn’t fight back.

“SAM!” Jodi attempts, it’s useless.

Luckily, Vincent is out with Penny for his daily lessons.

Kent simply glances up over his son’s head and meets Sebastian’s glare. He smirks.

“You really letting a little girl’s words get to your head, Sammy boy?” The elder comments, Sam throwing a punch at his father’s face.

“Did you fucking touch her!?” The blond repeats, Kent spitting a few drops of blood from his mouth on the carpeted floor, barely caring.

“She asked for it; she was walking alone from the saloon at night, what more did I need?”

Sebastian can’t stop himself. He’s storming in, ripping Sam off of his father and slamming the man into the ground. Kneels down on his chest and sends blow after blow straight to the man’s face.

“YOU SON OF A FUCKING BITCH!”

Kent doesn’t fight back. He’s used to this. Finds it comedic.

Jodi’s eyes are wide, she’s shaking.

“What did he do?” She turns to look at her son who’s still glaring at daggers at the man who’s being torn to shreds.

“He fucking raped (Y/N).”

A gasp mixed with a sob rips from her throat.

“He’s gonna kill him.” She adds, Sam nodding.

“Fucking good.”

“SEBASTIAN!”

Her voice shoots through his brain like it’s the only sound he could understand.

He stops his assault and looks up at the front door where Abby is standing, holding the crying woman in her arms.

“You’re going to kill him.” (Y/N) whimpers, Sebastian turning to look at the elder who’s barely conscious.

He fucking deserves it.

He says nothing. Feels the cloud in his brain start to wear off as he realises his number one priority is to protect her.

He’s not sorry.

“Couldn’t keep your fuckin’ mouth shut, huh?” Kent struggles to speak but her eyes lock with his and she feels her breathing lose control once again. “Should’a known little bitches like you can’t handle an experienced-”

The crack of his nose echoes as Sam slams his fist into his father’s face, finally knocking him out.

The woman drops to her knees once more. All she can hear is white noise ringing in her ears. Her vision is filling with colours. She vaguely sees Sebastian running toward her, hands on her face and calling her name, but it falls on deaf ears.

Her eyelids fail her and her body falls forward into the dark-haired boy.

“Fuck, baby,” Sebastian whispers as he catches her limp body.

There’s momentary silence as everyone tries to deal with everything that’s happened. Happening.

“I’m taking her to my house,” Sebastian announces, lifting the woman up, bridal style, and walking away without waiting for a word from anyone else.

She needs space and time. He’ll give it to her.

His mother and Demetrius are away on a trip, Maru never disturbs him anyway. She’ll be okay. She’ll be away from that house too. Both hers and his.

///

The sound of the all-too-familiar mechanical keyboard stirs her from her rest. Sebastian.

But why is she at Sebastian’s? She was at home and-

She jolts up with a gasp. Eyes wide.

Sebastian reacts, his own eyes wide as he sees the woman wake up suddenly.

“Hey, it’s okay. You’re at my house, we’re alone, you’re okay.”

The woman stares at him as it takes her a minute to process his words.

“You passed out; I brought you here. Figured you didn’t want to be alone at that house right now.”

She nods, gulping.

“Here,” The boy offers, handing the woman his water bottle. She graciously accepts and gulps three-quarters of it. “How’re you feeling?”

She looks around as if she’d find the answer to that question somewhere.

She shrugs.

“Scared.”

“You don’t need to be scared, (Y/N). Not anymore.”

He stands up and takes the few steps toward his bed.

“Can I sit?”

She nods, scooching over to allow room for the man.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N).”

Her head shakes. She doesn’t want him to be sorry. He has no reason to be sorry.

“You haven’t done anything wrong.”

“My job is to be there for you-”

“No, it’s not,” The woman is shaking her head this time. “I’m not your responsibility, Seb.”

“No, but you’re the woman I love, the reason I wake up every God damn morning. I should be the one keeping you safe. I want to be the one keeping you safe, but fuck, I failed so hard that night.”

“Seb,”

“You don’t understand how much I look up to you. You’re so unbelievably perfect in your own way, and your innocence and selflessness are your two biggest, most beautiful features, and they were fucking taken advantage of by that son of a bitch…”

“Sebby…” It’s a whimper. She climbs into his lap once again and they hold onto one another as tight as they can.

“I won’t let you go, doll. I won’t let anyone hurt you again, I swear it.”

All the woman can do is nod.

She stays at Sebastian’s for a few days, asking if she can speak to Maru about it.

“Are you sure?” The man’s brows furrow in concern.

“I need to get checked…” She trails off, not wanting to admit the explicit details of what she needs checking for.

His eyes soften in realisation. The man nods.

“I can bring her down here if you prefer?”

(Y/N) hasn’t left Sebastian’s room other than to go to the bathroom, to which she asked the boy to go with her. She was far too scared to do anything alone right now and it crushes both their hearts.

She shakes her head though.

“Kitchen?”

A small smile etches onto Sebastian’s lips as he nods, taking the woman’s hand and leading her upstairs.

“Maru, can I borrow you in the kitchen, please? Important.”

“Two secs!” His sister calls back.

(Y/N)’s fingers dance along the patterns in the wood on their dining table while she waits for Maru to come up.

“You want a drink?” Sebastian asks, boiling the kettle.

“Tea, please.”

“Of course.”

Maru is mildly startled by the unexpected presence of (Y/N) in the room but not bothered.

“Oh, hey, (Y/N)! I didn’t realise you were here.” She smiles.

The farmer can’t form words, simply smiles.

“(Y/N) needs to talk to you about something serious and I need you to keep it confidential.” Sebastian briefs, his sister’s expression falling at the seriousness of her brother’s expression.

She gulps and nods.

“Okay, sure.” Maru confirms, glancing at (Y/N) once more.

The woman hesitates as she searches for the words.

“You want me to…?” Sebastian mutters as he pours the boiling water into a mug for her drink.

(Y/N) shakes her head.

“I had someone…” She pauses, trailing off as she attempts to find the right way to phrase it. “I need to get checked over for anything that might’ve happened following unexpected sexual intercourse.”

She expects Maru’s expression to change but the woman simply nods as she listens, keeping a professional look on her face the whole time. Sebastian admires his sister for that.

“It was forced, and it hurt, so I’d like to make sure that there’s no chance of STIs, damage or,” She trails off again. “Or pregnancy.”

Sebastian freezes up at the statement, having not even thought about the latter.

Maru nods and offers a comforting smile.

“That’s okay. I’m sorry that happened to you, (Y/N), but I’m happy to get you checked out. Harvey will have to know as there are some stages of those checks that I’m still not one-hundred percent familiar with yet. Of course he’ll keep it entirely confidential.”

(Y/N) nods back and returns the smile.

“That’s okay.” Her voice breaks despite the words being a mere whisper.

“When can it be done?” Sebastian asks, sitting the mug of tea in front of the farmer.

“Whenever, really. Harvey will be happy to do it out of hours for you.”

The siblings turn to look at (Y/N), awaiting her response. She can feel the stare but keeps her eyes on the mint green mug that sits in front of her.

“The sooner the better, really.”

“We can head over now if you like? Get it over and done with while town is quiet?” Maru offers.

(Y/N) glances at Sebastian.

“Will you come with me?”

She wants to confidently say that she will be more than safe when with Harvey and Maru, but once upon a time she thought the same about Kent.

“Of course I will.” The man breathes, taking her hand in his and giving it a small squeeze.

The trio get ready and head on down to the surgery, trying to avoid being seen by anyone, which is easy given that it’s eight PM, everyone either in bed or at the saloon.

Maru unlocks the surgery with her key and ushers Sebastian and (Y/N) inside before asking them to wait by the reception desk as she goes and grabs Harvey.

“You okay?” Sebastian whispers, turning to face the woman as she keeps her gaze on the floor.

She shrugs.

“I love you so much, (Y/N). I’m not going to leave your side whilst you recover from this, okay? Not unless you ask me to.”

The woman simply nods her head against his chest as he pulls her in for a hug.

The echoing of footsteps prompts Sebastian to look down the corridor and see Maru and Harvey heading toward the pair.

“Good evening both,” The doctor greets, Sebastian nodding.

“Evening, Harvey, sorry to bother you after hours.”

“Never a bother, Sebastian, but thank you. Would you guys like to come through?”

The pair are led to a medical examination room, everyone taking a seat.

“Maru told me it would be best to let yourself tell me what you’re here for, (Y/N).” Harvey explains, watching the woman keep her eyes on anything else.

Sebastian’s hand rests on the farmer’s lower back, stroking it slowly to keep her grounded.

“I, uh, I need to get checked over for any after-effects from forced sexual intercourse.” She briefs, finally looking up to meet Harvey’s earnest stare. “STIs, damage, pregnancy, whatever.”

The doctor nods in understanding.

“Okay. Just to confirm, are you happy with everyone in this room remaining here whilst I assess you?” He asks, (Y/N) nodding. “Okay. Firstly, are you using any medical contraceptive method? Contraceptive pill, implant, IUD or anything?” He asks, (Y/N) shaking her head.

“None of it.”

“Okay, and when did the intercourse occur?” Harvey continues, opening up the woman’s medical file on his computer.

“Friday, Spring twenty-six. Around nine PM until the early hours of the morning.”

Sebastian feels himself tearing up again as the woman begins to go into depth about that night. This is his first time hearing the full story.

Harvey nods and he makes notes.

“Was it solely vaginal intercourse?”

The woman gulps and glances down at the oh-so-exciting floor once again.

“Giving and receiving of oral.”

The doctor continues to nod and make notes, Sebastian’s eyes remaining on the woman’s face, despite her own remaining on the floor.

“Still forced?” Harvey clarifies, watching her nod and hum and agreement. “Is there any chance any damage could’ve been done to the back of your throat?”

Her eyes clench shut before she nods. She feels Sebastian’s hand tense up on her back before returning to soft strokes. She’s grateful.

“Okay. Did the person physically hurt you anywhere besides the vagina and throat?”

The woman gulps before braving a look up at the doctor.

“I think he hit the back of my neck which knocked me out initially before he’d even touched me. He also choked me until I lost consciousness. That’s all.”

Harvey continues nodding and typing.

Sebastian wants nothing more than to storm out of the hospital there and then and give Kent another piece of his mind, but he knows his priorities right now.

He hasn’t heard from Abigail, Sam or Sam’s family since they confronted the soldier earlier that week. He doesn’t know what’s happened, he doesn’t care right now.

“Okay. I’m going to check you over if that’s okay with you, (Y/N). What I’ll do is check the back of your neck for any signs of damage, then I’ll check the back of your throat before anything more intimate. I’ll test for any infection whilst looking down there, and then we can check for pregnancy. Is that okay?”

She nods.

“Can Sebastian stay?” She manages, voice breaking once again.

Harvey nods with a small smile.

“If you’re comfortable with him here, he’s welcome to stay.”

The woman sits herself on the bed and the doctor begins looking her over. The neck is fine, the throat is fine, but she tenses up as she awaits the next step.

“Do you think you can take your jeans and underwear off for me, (Y/N)?” Harvey asks, his face remaining neutral other than the offer of a reassuring smile.

Her eyes glance at Maru who’s been shadowing the doctor. She simply has the same expression.

The woman nods.

“Okay. I’ll go wait outside with Maru. Would you like Sebastian to wait outside?”

“No.” It’s desperate, her eyes suddenly widening.

The sudden thought of being left to get undressed without Sebastian there to keep her safe is overwhelming.

“That’s okay, (Y/N), it’s no problem. Sebastian, are you happy to stay with her?” The doctor checks, the latter nodding.

“Of course.”

“Okay. We’ll be waiting just outside if you want to give us a shout when you’re ready.”

The farmer nods, as does Sebastian, and they leave, shutting the door behind them.

The pair remain silent for a moment, (Y/N) sitting on the edge of the examination bed.

“Hey,” Sebastian whispers, standing in front of the woman and resting his hands on either side of her face. “You’re okay.”

(Y/N) finally meets his gaze and offers a small smile.

“Thank you.” A breath of words but they make Sebastian’s heart light up.

“You don’t need to thank me, doll. I’ll always be here for you.”

The woman manages to take off her bottom half, leaving them in a pile on the leather chair beside Sebastian.

“Do I look disgusting?” She whispers, sitting back down on the edge of the hospital bed.

She watches the way Sebastian’s eyes widen and his heart breaks at the question.

“(Y/N), you look beautiful.” He remains sat down beside her, hands on his lap, not wanting to make her uncomfortable. “You always have been and always will be beautiful to me.”

They fall into a comfortable silence for a moment before Sebastian offers to go and get Harvey. (Y/N) nods.

“Okay, (Y/N), if you want to lay down for me and spread your legs as much as you comfortably can.”

The doctor checks for everything he needs and takes all relevant tests. She starts crying and Sebastian is immediately by her side, letting her hide her face in his chest and cling into his t-shirt, managing to tell Harvey to keep going.

“It’s okay, baby, it’s okay.” Sebastian murmurs, stroking her hair as she holds onto him for dear life. “You’re safe, (Y/N), I promise. It’s okay, it’ll be over soon.”

Maru admires her brother’s comfort to the farmer. She’s never seen him interact with anyone besides Sam occasionally, and Abigail, but turns out that her brother is an absolute sweetheart behind his cold exterior.

(Y/N) doesn’t let up crying, even when Harvey confirms he’s finished. He asks if he’s okay to check for signs of pregnancy and she manages a tearful affirmation.

Both Maru and Harvey have come to know the farmer very well. She’s an angel to everyone in the town, how could they not? So knowing that someone has forced themselves onto her isn’t exactly easy to deal with. They’re furious and heartbroken, but they can’t show that right now.

About thirty minutes passes, (Y/N) finally calming down and getting dressed, Sebastian still stood by her side, fingers running through her hair in attempted comfort. It works.

“Okay, (Y/N),” The doctor begins, (Y/N) tensing up as she awaits the daunting result she doesn’t dare wish to hear. “I’ve run some tests, I’ve run a couple of them a few times to confirm. (Y/N), I’m sorry but you’re pregnant.”

Sebastian’s eyes widen and his movements seize on the woman. He wishes with all his fucking heart that it could be bad timing and the baby is actually his but he has never once failed to pull out.

The woman trembles all over and simply stares at Harvey.

“One-hundred percent?” She whispers, the doctor nodding.

“I would recommend taking a test in three weeks to confirm again, just in case.” Harvey continues, “The tests for infection usually take a couple of weeks to come back but I’ll let you know as soon as I receive them.”

She barely manages another nod.

“I have some leaflets here with recommendations for local counselling, therapy and support groups in Zuzu city for this kind of trauma in case you’re interested.” He offers, handing them to the woman. “(Y/N), I’ll give you time to think everything over, but I’m going to make you aware that if you decide at any point that you may wish to have an abortion, you must let me know before twenty-four weeks.”

The woman simply nods but her movements are robotic.

“Thank you.”

“I need you to know that above all else, I’m your doctor, and I’ll remain professional in that fact, however as a friend, I’m truly sorry.”

“Thank you, Harvey.” It’s another whisper, but he nods.

Sebastian and (Y/N) leave the surgery, Maru staying behind to speak to Harvey about how her shadowing went, and head back to the Carpenter’s home.

They don’t speak but do hold hands the entire journey.

“Are you hungry?” Sebastian asks as they step inside.

“Not really. I just wanna sleep.”

He wants to tell her that she should eat but all he can think about is giving her what she wants.

“Okay, doll.”

They head into his room where she hovers by the door, suddenly feeling very intrusive, despite how many times she’s made herself at home in this room.

“Do you wanna borrow some pyjamas?” The boy asks, opening his drawers and finding an old tee and some sweatpants for her.

She nods and accepts them.

“I’ll look away while you change - saves you going to the bathroom.”

“Thank you.”

The silence is blissful, Sebastian briefly checking his phone and seeing some missed calls from Abigail but choosing to ignore them. There’s so much to talk about but it can wait until she’s rested.

“You can keep sleeping in my bed. Would you like me to sleep on the floor in here still or on the sofa upstairs?” The man asks as the farmer confirms that she’s dressed.

The woman glances around the room as she contemplates the options.

“Would it be too much to ask you to sleep in the bed with me?”

It could almost be comedic that she’s asking if it would be too much as the pair have slept together in the same bed many a time on many occasions. But this is different.

The last time she shared a bed with a man…

“You could never ask too much of me. I’ll do whatever you need, doll.”

She nods, tucking herself into the bed at the far side against the wall, eyes looking at Sebastian as she awaits him to join.

“Want me to keep my clothes on?” He asks, usually sleeping in only his underwear.

She nods again, looking more anxious than he’s ever seen.

“Please.”

“Okay.” He hopes the smile he offers is as reassuring as he intended.

Sebastian keeps only a sidelight on as he settles himself beside his best friend, rolling on his side to watch her as her eyes remain trained on the ever-interesting ceiling.

It’s when tears escape her eyes once again that he sighs.

“Come here, baby.” She complies without hesitation, rolling over and curling herself into the man as his arms wrap around her. “It’s okay, (Y/N). You’re gonna be okay. I’m not going anywhere, you’re not alone anymore, I promise.”

They fall asleep pretty quickly, Sebastian waking up to the sound of his bedroom door knocking.

He quickly rolls out of bed and pulls it open, not wanting to wake the woman.

“What’s up?” He asks, coming face to face with his sister.

“Sam’s at the door and pretty desperate to see you.” Maru tells him, looking guilty for having to interrupt the boy. “I told him to come back later, but…”

Sebastian shakes his head.

“It’s fine, don’t worry. Thank you.” He smiles at her for the first time in her life. “Can you send him down?”

“Of course.”

The boy turns and admires the woman on the bed as she stirs and manages to open her eyes.

“Good morning.” Sebastian mutters loud enough for her to hear.

“Hi…” She remains snuggled up under the duvet.

Sam’s footsteps coming downstairs capture Sebastian’s attention once more.

(Y/N)’s brows furrow and she sits up, awaiting the visitor.

The two men, who are best friends and can never stop talking, don’t say a word to greet one another.

The blond simply eyes Sebastian, silently asking dozens of questions.

The darker-haired man glances back at (Y/N).

“It’s Sam; you okay with him coming in?” His eyes tell her that if she says no, he’ll make sure that blond leaves and never comes back until she’s happy for him to.

She nods.

Sebastian gestures his head to the blond, inviting him in. Sam looks at the woman, anxiously pulling on the bottom seam of Sebastian’s oversized t-shirt. She’s scared of him. She’s his best friend and he made her scared of him.

He’s fucking stupid. He hates himself. She kept such a horrible fucking secret for so long to try and protect him. She never should’ve had to.

“I’m sorry.” His voice breaks. He wanted to stay strong but he can’t. His best friend was fucking raped by his father. How could he ever be strong after that?

She doesn’t respond, simply tears up.

“I’m so fucking sorry, (Y/N). I scared you. I was angry and overwhelmed with the situation and I acted impulsively. There’s no excuse, I was a fucking horrible friend.” He begins, Sebastian now having shut his bedroom door and taking a seat at his computer desk.

He acknowledges it’s just gone nine-thirty AM.

“I love you so fucking much and I need you to know that I’m here for you. No words on the planet can excuse what that man did to you and I absolutely do not see him as a father - not anymore.”

Her eyes soften.

“Sam-”

“I could’ve killed him (Y/N). I really could’ve. I was going to.” The blond confesses, throwing his head back and taking a deep breath. “Jodi kicked me out.”

“What?” Sebastian breathes, brows furrowed.

“She doesn’t believe it’s true. Told me that we’ve all been fucked up in the head by you.” Sam explains, gesturing to Sebastian.

“What the fuck?”

“I know, right?”

Another silence falls over them.

“I’m pregnant.” She whispers, Sam’s eyes widening and staring at the woman like she’s just grown another pair of legs.

She’s crying. The tears are soaking the t-shirt she’s wearing, soaking the bedsheets, soaking the duvet.

The blond’s head turns, almost mechanically, to Sebastian, his eyes remaining wide.

“Tell me it’s yours.”

Sebastian’s heavy breaths are heard by both of them.

It’s the first time Sam has confessed that he’s painfully aware that his two best friends have slept together. It wasn’t exactly a secret but they weren’t bragging about it. It was casual.

(Y/N) has never wished more that the baby inside her belonged to the emo boy who lives in Robin’s basement.

“I wish I could.”

Sam paces for a moment before walking toward Sebastian’s bedroom door and sending his fist straight through the wall.

“FUCK!”

“Sammy,” Her voice whimpers, the blond spinning round and meeting the tearful expression of his best friend. “I’m so sorry.”

He sobs. Truly. He sobs and strides over to the bed, her arms reaching out for the man which he collides with.

The pair cling onto each other, Sebastian watching with his own tears streaming.

“You’re not alone.” Sam finally states, pulling back from the embrace and resting his hands on the woman’s shoulders. “You’re not alone, (Y/N), I promise you. That baby, you’re beyond welcome to get rid of it, we’d support you every step of the way, but if you wanna keep it, we’re not going anywhere. I can already tell you that Sebastian would be the greatest dad to that kid, and like it or not, they’re gonna be my sibling, and I would fucking die for them. Abigail would be the cool Aunt as well.”

The woman’s lips tremble as she listens to the blond and sees the seriousness in his eyes.

“I’m not letting that fucker anywhere near you or that baby. Neither is Seb.” He promises, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I’m sorry I got mad, but I promise you I’m on your side. Us against the world.”

Sam gasps as he’s pulled backwards and upright, Sebastian’s arms wrapping around the blond and clinging on tight. He quickly replicates the action as they both sob into each other’s shoulders.

“I love you, man.” Sebastian’s words make Sam tighten his hold.

“You too, bro. I’m sorry I lost my shit.”

Sebastian merely shakes his head.

They pull back slightly as they feel another pair of arms wrap around them. They each wrap an arm around the woman and hold her close.

“Thank you.” Is all the farmer can manage, the boys squeezing her tighter.

“We’re gonna be okay,” Sam whispers, glancing down at the woman who forces a smile and nods. “We’re gonna be okay.”

#Stardew Valley #sebastian stardew valley #sam stardew valley #abigail stardew valley #kent stardew valley #jodi stardew valley #Sebastian x Reader #Sam x Reader #non con #Stardew Valley non con #Kent x Reader #Stardew Valley angst #Angst #Smut #Stardew Valley smut #Fluff

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 years

Text

Of something beautiful, but annihilating🚬3

Warnings: nonconsensual sex, violence and abuse, mentions of miscarriage, mentions of death'; violence, attempted rape.

This is dark!fic and explicit. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Reader’s husband brings home an unexpected houseguest.

Note: So this is for black Friday and then I’ll be working all today and tomorrow and schedule’s are super late so I dunno when Im working after that. Hope you guys enjoy and don’t hesitate to drop by my asks.

Thank you. Love you guys!

As always, if you can, please leave some feedback, like and reblog <3

Arvin let you pick the record. You found it among the box of your daddy’s music. It was one of your favourites and you were glad he wasn’t bothered by Patsy Cline’s droll tones. He seemed to enjoy it as he sat and read a magazine and you searched for a button from your large tin to match that missing from Roy’s jacket.

“You ever listen to Elvis?” He looked up from behind the pages.

“I… I heard him on the radio but you know we haven’t got new records since Daddy died,” you said as you continued your hunt. “And Roy don’t like all that new music. He says it’s no good.”

“Well, he doesn’t seem to like much, does he?” Arvin sniffed, “I always knew he was a grouch but I just thought it was the job.”

“He’s not… He’s just stressed. He works so much.” You looked down and settled on a button that was close enough.

“You do too,” Arvin hid behind the magazine again. “You should be the one goin’ out and doin’ what you like on a Saturday. Hell, if he ain’t gonna spend his time with you, you should do something of your own.”

“I like sewing,” you shrugged as you threaded the button, “You know, it’s not so bad. I get time to myself. A lot of people can’t say that.”

“Sounds pretty lonely to me,” he flicked the page.

You were silent. You didn’t know how to respond. He was skirting around what he really wanted to say, what you didn’t want him to talk about. The tension in the air thickened as you feared he would admit that he knew or you might confess that your husband wasn’t much of one. Hell, you’d yet to accept that yourself.

Your fears were assuaged by the sudden clatter on the porch and the hinges of the door as it was swung open. You sat up and set aside Roy’s jacket. You stood as he staggered inside. He always did like to drink when he fished, or did much of anything else. You frowned as he tracked mud in on his tall rubber boots.

“Roy, you’re making a mess,” you said as you went to the doorway and watched him stumble around the entryway.

“Keep ya busy,” he slapped a hand on the wall and wiggled his leg free of a boot. “There’s a whole pail of fish out front too.”

“Mmm,” you hummed as his cheeks glowed. You doubted he’d be awake that long. “Well, I’ll just fry those up while you sit down.”

“Agh,” he tripped over his other boot as he slipped it off and Arvin brushed by you to catch him.

“Hey, Roy,” he took his arm, “How was the fishing? Why don’t you sit down? We’ll have a beer.”

“I almost forgot about you, boy,” he shook free of Arvin and ambled closer to you, “Maybe you can hide away after dinner for a while?”

He dragged his hand up your thigh and slapped your ass as he passed you. Arvin turned as Roy clumsily traipsed into the living room and fell onto the couch. He looked at you but you couldn’t stand to meet his.

“Sure,” Arvin uttered, “I’ll just go get those fish first.”

He disappeared through the front door and you crossed your arms as you turned to watch your husband. His head lolled as he chuckled.

“You think he ever fucked a girl?” He asked, “Boy tiptoes around like a virgin.”

“That’s crass, Roy,” you reproached.

“Don’t act so innocent,” he snapped, “If you didn’t, maybe I’d… well.”

His words trailed off and he closed his eyes. He yawned and sighed loudly. You grimaced and listened to the door as it hit the frame again. Arvin continued onto the kitchen as Roy began to snore. It must have been a record how quickly he’d passed out this time.

You went through to the kitchen as Arvin drained the water from the pail of fish. You went to the drawer and got a knife. You rest it on its end as you gripped it and looked out the window.

“He’s already out for the night,” you said, “You hungry?”

“I said I’d make the fish, I meant it.”

“Nah, I’ll flay them and put ‘em in the fridge,” you swallowed, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“That you’re stuck here with us. Sorry he’s always drunk.” You looked down at the blade. You didn’t say what you really wanted to. Sorry you were stupid enough to choose Roy.

“That isn’t your fault and you know, I don’t mind it so much.” He neared, “We’re friends now, aren’t we? That’s worth it.”

You nodded but couldn’t smile. He always tried to make things seem nicer than they were. He was much better at it than you were.

“You comin’ to church tomorrow?”

“Of course,” he answered like it was obvious.

You turned away and laid out the fish across the cutting board. He stayed behind you, the record silenced and began to skip.

“I think I got somethin’ nice I can find.” He left you and the crackle of the Victrola died.

You slice the fish, careful not to cut your fingers as you deboned it and tossed away the heads and tails. You heard Arvin speak in a low voice and a grumble. Then heavy footsteps interspersed with lighter ones. The stairs groaned and you kept on, wrapping the filets in paper and tucking it away.

You cleaned up and washed the smell off your hands. The living room was empty so you climbed the stairs and found Roy face down on your bed. You turned to the open attic and Arvin descended the ladder.

“You got him to bed?” You tilted your head.

“Wasn’t so hard. Poked him a few times.” He grinned. “So what time do I needa be ready for church?”

“We leave about twenty minutes before service. It’s at eight.” You answered, “Oh, you know what--” You raised your index finger, “One sec.”

You spun and scurried into your father’s room. It was just as it had been before he died except now there were boxes stacked along one wall. You pushed open the closet and fluttered through the clothes hanging within. You pulled out the old grey suit and white shirt that had yet to yellow. You grabbed a tie from the drawer as you passed the dresser.

You smelled them as you went back to the door as Arvin peeked in.

“For church,” you held them out, “My daddy was a bit taller but he got skinny near the end. I can pin up the pants for you and you’ll look just fine.”

“Oh,” he face paled, “You-- I can’t--”

“Roy’ll never fit into these so please,” you pushed them against his chest. “And I don’t think he’ll be up in time for church so I need you to drive.”

He smiled and took the clothes. He hugged them as if they were precious. “Thank you. I’m gonna sound like you for a moment but you really didn’t have to.”

“You think I’m gonna forget that you promised to make the fish? It’ll be a nice Sunday night dinner.” You inhaled deeply, “I think that for tonight, I’m gonna lay down though.”

“Alright,” he let you past, “You have a good night.”

“You too,” you neared your bedroom door as Roy’s snores grew louder, “Might have to stuff my ears with cotton.”

🚬

As you expected, Roy was too hungover to get up for church. You didn’t really go for the sermons but your daddy made it a habit when you were young to make sure you got to see the other kids in town. Sunday school had socialised you in the circles of the small town but they had proven less than welcoming. And since you’d grown out of your education, you went to trade recipes with some of the other wives.

Arvin was awake before you. As you pulled a cardigan over your blue dress you stopped at the bottom of the stairs and he appeared from the front room.

“Oh, Arvin,” you smiled, “That suit looks real nice on you. And the pants…”

“I sewed them myself last night,” he lifted his foot, “Remembered a few stitches.” He straightened the jacket, “You look real good too.”

“Well, aren’t we a pair?” You chimed. “Gonna have to be since Roy hasn’t moved since you dragged him to bed.”

“After you,” he waved to the door, “Think we should get goin’. My daddy woulda whipped me being late for the lord’s prayer.

You led him out the door and climbed into the truck opposite him. He turned the ignition and the engine rumbled to life. You felt calm as you smelled the early morning dew and you looked out the window as he shifted into gear. The lush green grass passed you by and trees swayed as he steered along the old country road.

As always, the church was crowded. You and Arvin squeezed in at the back. He was quiet and sombre as you entered. As you sat, you looked over at him. His jaw squared as the preacher came out and began his weekly scourge. A fire burned behind Arvin’s brown irises and he scowled for a moment before his face went placid.

You looked forward and folded your hands as you listened to Father Milton. You never cared much for his talk of hellfire and brimstone, to be fair, your daddy didn’t either, but in a small town, everyone knew when one was away from service. Roy never cared what anyone thought but you had to deal with Noreen and the other ladies at the grocer or around town about their own tasks.

When mass finished, you stood but Arvin hesitated. He stared up at the altar before he finally rose. He nodded to you and followed you and the other worshippers out into the sun.

You heard your name as you headed for the truck. You stopped and Arvin did too. You turned as Noreen, a woman older than yourself who fashioned herself to be the model for all society ladies, approached you. She wore a wide-brimmed hat over her blonde hair and took short steps in her heels.

“You promised me that carrot cake recipe. The one with the raisins.” She said. “Now I’ve been hounding you for three weeks.”

“Oh, uh,” you unclasped your pocketbook and fished out the card you’d made sure to stow after last Sunday. “Right here. I’m sorry, Noreen, but I gotta get back.”

“Where is Roy? Was he off drinkin’ again? You know, the lord did warn us all against excess.”

“Well, perhaps we can get him to come next week and you can warn him,” Arvin intoned and Noreen looked over in shock.

“Excuse me. And who is this… man you have as your escort?”

“Roy is letting the attic out to him. They work together. This is Arvin.”

“Arvin Russell,” he introduced firmly.

“That’s an unusual name,” Noreen remarked, “You’re not from here?”

“No, but from a place like this.” He countered, “I’m gonna go get the truck goin’.”

He turned without courtesy and marched away. You looked back to Noreen as she curled her lip.

“Oh, he is a rough one, isn’t he? You have that scoundrel livin’ with you?”

“He’s a good man. Helps around the house. It’s a big place and Missy Grable has a tenant of her own.”

“Missy Grable has a farmhand to tend the fields,” Noreen lifted her chin.

You weren’t certain what to say. Noreen always found issue with whatever you said and you hated to give her further reason to.

“Well, here’s the recipe. I really ought to go.” You said.

“I understand, honey,” She smirked, “Your husband needs his caretaker… oh sorry, wife.”

You flinched but said nothing else. Your shoulders dropped as you turned away and dragged your heels through the dirt. You opened the truck and climbed in without a word. You clutched your pocketbook and stared ahead as Arvin back out of the lot.

“Pardon my saying so and I don’t use this word often, but she was a bitch,” Arvin said. “Remind me why I ain’t go to church.”

You looked down and nervously unclasped and unclasped your purse. “You didn’t have to come.”

“No, it’s your house and I wanna be a good guest,” he said, “It’s nothing to do with you.”

You scoffed and shook your head. “My daddy hated goin’ too but he didn’t want me to be ostracised, you know? He told me, near the end, that he stopped believin’ durin’ the war. He said no god would let the things happen that he saw.” You leaned against the door and watched the buildings pass. “Seein’ how these Christians act, I can’t blame him.”

Arvin was quiet as you left the main street and the house began to thin out until the country sprawled out around you.

“My sister…” he said so low you barely heard him. He cleared his throat and spoke louder. “My cousin, she was tricked by a preacher man. She was young and too willing to love. And he was just a liar. He knocked her up then refused her.” His voice was brittle and you glanced over as his hand tightened on the steering wheel. “She hung herself but it was that snake-tongued charlatan who killed her.” He shook his head. “No god would take her like that. No god would let a man sworn to him trick the innocent.” He rubbed his forehead as his eyes bore into the distance, “I’m sorry. Just been a while since I sat in a pew.”

“No, I’m… sorry. Sorry about your cousin.” You said, “I didn’t-- You can stay home next week.”

He pondered it and a little smile curled his lips. “Don’t think I will. Think I’d like to see that Noreen again. Maybe say a prayer for her soul, wherever it may be.”

🚬

Roy was still in bed when you got home. You tried to rouse him and he swatted you away. You brought him a sandwich and some water and left it beside him. You went back down to clean up as Arvin sat in the front room, As you wiped your hands, the record player buzzed and a tune rose on noontime air.

You went to the living room as Arvin stood straight and you listened to the smooth tones of Sinatra. He turned to you as you entered.

“I like this one,” you said.

“Me too,” He had shed the jacket and unbuttoned the top button of his shirt, his tie disposed of. He turned his palm up as he stepped away from the player. “You dance?”

You giggled and shook your head. “No, not much of a dancer. Roy wouldn’t even at the wedding.”

“Come on. It’s a good song.” He got closer and began to sing out of tune, “I get no kick from champagne. Mere alcohol doesn't thrill me at all…”

You shied away and he caught your hand. You let him draw you closer and smiled as your cheeks warmed up.

“Just follow my lead,” he urged as he moved his feet, “Don’t look down, just one, two, one, two…”

You moved your feet around his as he swayed you and turned you on the spot. His hand settled on your lower back and you grasped his shoulders. You were jittery as you moved with him in time to the music.

“Arvin…” You breathed.

“Every pretty girl should dance,” he said, “I’d say you’re a hell of a dancer for a beginner.”

“Thanks,” you trilled and settled into his embrace.

“I mean it. You deserve more.” He leaned closer and you felt his hot breath on you. “You deserve the world.”

You smiled as he gazed across at you. Your heart leapt as there was a sudden clamour by the stairs and you pushed away from Arvin as Roy stomped into the doorframe. His hand fell away from your back and you tiptoed over to your husband.

“Roy, you’re awake? How ya feelin’?”

“All this goddamn noise you makin’ down here,” he grumbled, “Shut off that dang thing. There’s a game on.”

You flitted away and turned off the Victrola. You looked at Arvin as he watched Roy. He looked irritated and repulsed by the man.

“I gotta do some chores,” you muttered. “You boys enjoy the game.”

“I think I’m just gonna go upstairs,” Arvin tucked his hands in his pockets. “I’ll be down to cook that fish in a bit.”

You watched the younger man leave and Roy turned the dial on the radio. Your husband flopped onto the couch as the commentator’s voice filled the room.

“How about a beer?” He demanded, not asked.

🚬

The day turned to night. Dinner was quiet and tense. Roy didn’t drink as much as the day before but the alcohol made little difference. Arvin was pensive and seemed to lose himself in thought. You were nervous as you thought of the dance and your temperamental husband.

You hadn’t done anything wrong. It was just a dance. How come Roy could spend his days drunk and dozing and you couldn’t do anything you liked?

You cleaned up after supper. Arvin retreated to his room once more as Roy sat in the living room with another bottle and you tidied up. You cleared the last of the mess and looked out into the front room. Roy belched and sneered as he saw you.

“Wife,” he beckoned you forward with two fingers, “What did you do today?”

“Went to church. Cleaned.” You edged closer. “That’s all. I was real worried about you, Roy.”

“Were you?” He snorted and stood as he dropped his bottle on the table. “You didn’t seem too bothered when I came down.”

“What do you mean?” You stopped a foot away from him.

“You and that kid. You get on real well, don’t ya?” He snickered. “You down here dancing.”

“Just a dance, Roy,” you said meekly, “I didn’t wanna be rude.”

“You just wanna be a whore,” he snarled, “Huh? What you doin’ with that boy? I’m your husband.”

“I know, I know that, Roy. I never-- I didn’t do nothing.” You pleaded as he stepped closer. “I was just waitin’ for you to wake up.”

“Shut your fucking mouth,” he hissed as he grabbed the back of your head and thrust you close to him. “You been doin’ everything but what a wife is meant for.”

He tore open the front of your dress and you cried out. “I’m gonna fuck you and let that boy hear who you belong to.”

“Stop, please.”

“Stop!? This is what you promised me, dear wife.”

You struggled with him as the smell of alcohol on his breath made you cringe. He spun you and shoved you so hard you stumbled back against the couch. You got up as he ambled after you and were knocked back by his fist. You cradled your cheek as you fell onto the cushions.

He pushed you up against the back of the couch and tried to wrench your legs apart. You squeezed your knees together and slapped at him blindly as fear bubbled in your veins. He forced your legs open and knelt on the couch between them. He grabbed your throat as you tried to wriggle away and he struck you again. He never hit your face; he didn’t like people to see what he did to you.

“I’ll show you,” he muttered, “I’ll show you, you little whore.”

He reached for his fly but his face mirrored your shock as he suddenly stilled and for a moment, he froze in time before he fell back onto the floor. Arvin stepped aside to avoid the crash and turned to hit him across the face. Roy’s brow split and began to stream with blood.

Arvin struck him a third time and pointed the gun at his head as he laid prone on the floor. Roy touched the back of his skull as he stared up barrel. The whack from the butt of the gun would likely leave a worse lump than his punches.

“Get up and go.” Arvin growled. “Or I’m gonna smear this carpet with your brains.”

“Are you crazy? This is my house!” Roy barked and pushed himself up. The pistol clicked and Arvin pressed it to his head.

“It’s her daddy’s house.”

“She’s my wife, boy.”

“You don’t act like no husband,” Arvin said gruffly, “You think I’m scared? Think I haven’t shot a man before?”

“Sure you have, boy.”

“It’s different. You go out and you hunt your bucks and they don’t know what’s comin’, they don’t even know when they shot. But a man, oh he knows to the end. He begs, even if he can’t speak, he does. It’s in his eyes, in the way he gurgles as the life drains from his lips.” Arvin kicked Roy, “And once I pull this trigger, you’ll be begging too but it’ll be too late and there ain’t no words you can say to stop the blood. So you shut up and you go before you can’t.”

You were paralysed on the couch. Your head throbbed as you couldn’t believe what you were seeing. You trembled as Roy stood slowly and winced as Arvin followed his movement with the muzzle of the gun. Arvin followed your husband to the door and you heard the sharp whine of the other before it clattered shut.

Crickets chirped as dirt stirred beneath feet and you heard the old truck shudder to life. The door snapped shut and locked loudly. Arvin appeared and lowered the gun. You stared at it as he came close. He set it on the table and sat beside you as he touched your face and you winced.

“Are you okay?” He asked as he pulled you against him, “I’m sorry he hurt you. I shoulda-- shoulda been faster.”

“Arv…” Your voice turned to a wisp and you let him hold you.

“Shhh, it’s okay. I got you now.”

#arvin russell #arvin russell x reader #Dark Fic #dark!fic #reader x oc husband #fic #series #the devil all the time #of something beautiful but annihilating

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qyllenhaal · 3 years

Text

God’s Face in the Fire || Part 2

Dark!Lee Bodecker x Dark!Reader

Summary: A wife who would do anything to give her husband the world, even if it means getting herself involved with his trouble.

Word Count: 10.3k

Chapter warnings: dark themes!!! contains mentions of murder, non-graphic death scenes, smut (loss of virginity in a flashback scene), manipulation, brief mention of sexual assaults, misogyny, uncomfortable situations. Please heed the warnings!!! 18+ only

A/N: It's been forever since I posted. The last two weeks have left me discombobulated that it was hard to find time to sit down to write and edit this, but I'm glad I got to it! The next part is going to be the last part but I have plans to do one-shots for this universe. I'm going to be posting a Senator!Chris fic tomorrow so stay tuned for that.

Enjoy!

"You remember when I took you out for milkshakes and you spilled yours all over me? You were wearing that exact same color," Lee said pointing at the dress she was pressing.

"All those years ago, and you still remember that?" Y/n wanted to drown in this tender moment she's having with her husband. Hearing him laugh, his stomach shifting, and his eyes wrinkling.

"How could I? Watching you get all flustered and cute really got me goin’. It's when I knew I was gonna marry ya."

The days have been incredibly warm and beautiful since Y/n had done what she did. It was cruel irony that she was enjoying another day while someone’s body was rotting. The softer moments of life were few and far between these days, but right now she’s offered her a wonderful distraction.

She had taken on more tasks than usual to distract herself from the intrusive thoughts she had. She even accepted a last minute invite to help put on an event at the local rental hall with some of the other mothers in town. It gave her an excuse to look nice and show herself off to anyone who had some doubts about Lee. Things were looking good for him, but there was always something to do to further rehabilitate his image. She always looked her best as the sheriff's wife. Keeping up the appearances exhausted her since they have become more frequent for her. However if she wanted the people to fawn over her lovely family, she had to show up. An arts and crafts event for the kids is also a good chance to get their daughter out of the house.

Teenage Y/n did not see herself becoming a housewife so young. It was unsavory to think about being a homemaker for one of the boys’ at school. She surmised that she would’ve stuck by her original plan if she had not been so lonely. All of Y/n's friends left within a year of graduating high school. She didn't have that many friends to begin with, but she thought that at least one would always be there for her. Rose went to college, and Barbara found a man to marry and moved to upstate New York. Only one stayed for some time, Judith, but she eventually left after having a shotgun wedding. It was selfish of her to think that someone would stay just because she got rejected from the only college she had applied to. Other people had lives and Y/n was just not at the center of them.

The absence of her friends made her pregnancy more lonely. Her baby shower consisted of her family, Lee’s sister, and his co-workers and their wives. None of the women seemed to be fond of Y/n. It always plagued her mind to know if they thought she was too young and stupid or if it was just something else

She found solace in some of the other mother's in town. When she began showing up around to volunteer at bake sales and food drives she expected them to look at her face and then down at her belly and reject her. She is younger than them and feared they'd find her naïve. She had kept to herself for so long that she thought they'd write her off as the sheriff's meek wife.

Y/n didn't get a chance to mingle with anyone prior to her marriage and Lee made it harder by insisting in little ways that she stay in the house. No one was at fault that Lee wanted to keep her to himself. It was possible he did it out of insecurity, but Y/n now speculates that it was because he didn’t want to hear or even see what he may have been doing.

One of the ladies who Y/n only knew by her dark hair and distinct, pointy nose joked that Lee had, "finally let Rapunzel out of the castle." When the other mothers joined into laughter, she felt small. It was only a harmless joke that was steeped in the truth. It took her persistence to no longer wanting to feel alone while being pregnant to get the women to warm up to her, and the did.

"I remember spilling the milkshake, but I was too embarrassed to remember anything else about that night," she admitted.

Lee remembers that night very well. He wishes that she didn't end the night so quickly because she ruined a pair of trousers that could easily be replaced. He had only bought them to impress her, but it didn't take much to get her to swoon over him. No other man was giving her the time of day.

"We should go out to that diner Friday night. Now that we have someone to watch the little one, we don't have to stop by your parents to drop her off anymore. I can just scoop you up and we can have a night together," Lee pressed himself into Y/n's backside. She giggled when his hands lightly danced against her ticklish sides.

Lee had also been aware of the slim moments of intimacy with his wife. He was serious about this race but he truly underestimated how much time and effort he'd have to put into this. But people really did love the old mayor. The only slight Lee had against him was his old age and how some believed that if he kept going then he might run into some health problems. The rumors about him becoming more and more forgetful were minute compared to the dark gossip swirling about Lee though. Some of the people in town would probably vote for a paper bag before Lee.

His biggest fear is that he loses the election and drives his wife away. He could lose the race, but if his wife somehow slipped away, taking their baby with her, he’d drink himself into a stupor. Lee tried his very best to hide his insecurities from her. When he worried, she worried too and it made it much harder for him to plan his way out of whatever hole he is in when he has a hysterical wife to deal with. That's why he'd rather not tell her anything.

Lee also wasn't the young man in his prime anymore, he believed that his good looks were fading, and he has gained a considerable amount of weight. The fear of Y/n just up and leaving him for someone younger than him and riding off to the city always plagued him. The birth of their daughter should've assuaged him, but his self-doubt always lingered like a cloud that made him stick to his vices.

"I've really missed ya honey...missed this body of yours."

Y/n flinched when his hands ran down the front of her body, over her stomach and then circling up back to her breast. Her body has changed considerably since giving birth and the hormonal imbalance left her feeling tired, sad, and alone. Her mother told her that all she had to do was look at her child and she'd feel better, but every time she looked at her little girl all she did was worry. Was she a good mom? Why was her daughter crying so much without much working? Was Lee staying at work for long hours to avoid the crying and her? Did he still find her attractive?

They’re both too busy thinking Lee's mayoral bid to realize they felt the exact same way as each other. If there was any other time that proved they were an extension of each other, it was now, but they were too blind to see it.

"Lee y-you're going to be late for work," her voice was weakened by his lips now nipping at her neck.

"Don't give a damn," he whispered against her skin, inhaling her familiar scent, "just wanna feel my wife."

Today, Y/n felt herself slipping back into her normal self and normal life. She melted into Lee, hoping that maybe they could have a moment to themselves, but they were interrupted by the phone ringing downstairs. Every early morning and late night phone call had her on edge. They never seemed to be about anything important but it hasn't failed yet to make her stomach churn.

Lee groaned and pulled away from her. She watched him disappear to go answer the phone.

It has been nearly two days and the only thing on her mind is what happened after she left that brothel. The anxiety made her feel sick. Hours later after it happened, around 2 a.m., she woke up and darted to the toilet. Lee kept asking her if she was pregnant as he held her hair back while her face was in the toilet. She dismissed his claims, knowing full and well that she was just sickened by her actions.

Lee had not mentioned a death or anything related to that brothel, so had he even been found? Was his death even reported? The girls who worked for him were probably too worried about their own arrest than the death of their abusive boss.

She wiped the look of worry off of her face when she heard his heavy footsteps coming back up the stairs.

"Who was it?"

"Your brother," his tone held disgust, "invited us to dinner on Sunday. He asked to speak to you but I told him you were still sleep."

"Lee!"

"I don't want to hear it," his voice boomed, much more dominant and rough than hers, "I ain't having dinner with him and I don't want to hear your mouth about it."

Y/n stayed silent and watched him grab the police hat resting on the dresser. She hated for him to leave on such a sour note, but she wouldn't dare say anything in fear she might make things worse.

He started towards the door of their bedroom before turning back to his wife, "Sandy supposed to stop by Saturday. I don't know why, so don't ask, but she claims she's comin'. Who knows if she'll stick to her word."

It’s like Lee did that on purpose, as some sort of sick payback for her brother calling. Y/n was not fond of Sandy and did not like to be around her for more than ten minutes. Sandy was a nice girl, a bit unsavory at times, but her husband Carl was a stain on her life. There was something about him that reminded her of the men her mother had warned her about when she was a young teenager; a man with a slick tongue and a creepy air around him. However, she found Carl much more sinister than that. The look in Carl's eyes when he looked at her and flashed her that unsettling smile was imprinted into her brain. They did not come around much, but when they did it was always a traumatic experience for Y/n.

Lee left the room before Y/n could respond. He knows how Y/n feels, but he can’t bring himself to care right now. She’s not going to protest against it because she knows better than that. He focused on the sound of soft babbling from his daughter as he walked into her room.

"Hey you," she looked up at him with her big eyes and her widening smile that made his heart swell, "you gonna be good for your mama? You've been on a mean streak lately and I'd hate to make good on my threat and put you in baby jail."

His daughter reached up and tried to grab at his face. Lee was clean-shaven now, but for the first few months of his daughter's life he had enough hair on his face for her to grab a hold of. It was funny to see how she still tried to grab at his non-existent hair, pinching his skin in the process.

"Miss the beard little lady? You're just like your mama," he kissed her forehead and felt a deep sense of guilt that he had to leave her to go to work. But everything he did was for her and if he believes that the long hours are going to pay off. All of his work is going to pay off when he wins that race.

The dress her daughter wore was blush to complement her mother's golden one. She looked around at every single building and person they passed as if it was her first time seeing it again. Her sense of wonder always made Y/n adore her even more. Y/n wondered what was going on in the little mind of her and what sense she made of the world.

She was never fussy when they were out, which was good for Y/n, but also good for the rehabilitation of Lee's image. He has such a good daughter and pretty wife, he must be doing something right. Every single person who stopped to say hi or coo at how cute her baby was, Y/n wondered if they have ever said something negative about Lee. Y/n never received weird stares or grimaces that would make her paranoid, but she still felt on edge. She always wanted to be on her best behavior, especially when Lee was not with her.

Y/n was forced to be her normal self; cheerful even though her mind was reeling over two nights ago, her sister-in-law, and what the conversation between Lee and her brother this morning may have sounded like. When one of the toddlers thrusted their drawing her face she feigned an excited smile. She hoped the mother's didn't notice her lackluster attitude.

"Y/n , can I speak with you?"

It was Sally's voice that called to her. She looked at the blonde woman with a bit of panic on her face. She thought that she was going to get chewed out by her, especially since she pulled her far away from the other children, and her daughter who was being held by one of the recently graduated girls.

"Is everything alright Sally?"

"I should be asking you that. Why am I hear things about Mrs. Blackwater sayin' she seen your Lee dumpin' bodies in the river behind her house?" At that moment Y/n could not hear her despite her lips still moving. Her blood ran cold at that last name being mentioned. It's been years, close to a decade, since she thought about that old woman, but the mere mention of her name brought Y/n back to a place she didn't want to be.

"I-I...I don't know what she's talking about-"

"My husband and I made a sizable donation to your husband's campaign, and it would be a shame to see him lose," the sugary voice and fake smile on Sally's face made Y/n's stomach ache. She didn't like how some of these women could be so fake because it always made her question if they really liked her or not. But Sally didn't care what Y/n would respond with, all she cared about was her and her husband's reputation, "you're not that much younger than me so you remember them days when that old bitch would be on her porch spewin’ whatever nonsense she could think if at any girl who walked on her sidewalk. No one likes Mrs. Blackwater, but don't think for a second they won't consider what she has to say about that husband of yours. I've heard too many whispers about him and I don't like it. I'll pull my endorsements if you don't fix this shit."

Was murdering one person not enough to save her husband from losing this race? The brothel owner was one person, someone who would not be missed by many people, but could she do something about Mrs. Blackwater?

'That's not right, that's not right.'

No matter how much she tried to shake that evil idea off, it kept creeping into her mind. Murder was the unlikely tool she had in her arsenal all along. It was morally wrong to kill someone, but her victim and the potential one had not been nice people. Mrs. Blackwater's stain on this Earth paled in comparison to Reed's, but that woman made her blood run much colder than the brothel owner.

It was so ironic that Mr. Blackwater was a beloved man in town because no one could stand his wife. They knew not to cross her path and that pies and home cooked meals would not abate her disdain for people. A man who was so kind and friendly was married to the most antisocial person Y/n has ever come across. But he never wasted a moment to sing her her praises. Y/n remembers one of her sons and he was mean just like his mother; a school yard bully that would beat up on anyone he saw as weak and alone. Y/n was lucky that he knew she had an older brother to protect because the Blackwater’s youngest boy never tried anything with her. However, she was not lucky enough to escape the wrath of Mrs. Blackwater. The irony was that she probably would've been better off being a victim of her son. That woman was nasty and wasn't afraid to show it.

"Don't you two get tired of dressing like whores?"

They had to pass the Blackwater house to get to Rose's house. Her house used to be at the end of the street before it got burned down, leaving the Blackwater house the last one on the street. It was nice, and had a big, big porch that Mrs. Blackwater always sat on for most of the day. She didn't stop at calling them just "whores'' and "wenches" either. Y/n never could understand why they always took the brunt of that woman's anger. Rose went home in tears every time she walked by that house. Maybe Y/n's anger is displaced, but she blames Mrs. Blackwater for why Rose was so eager to leave. There wasn't much here, but Rose always promised she'd stay. But ever since they encountered Mrs. Blackwater's misery, Rose had changed.

She could imagine that same venomous voice saying awful things about her husband, "Lee Bodecker put that body in the water. I saw it with my own two eyes!"

The thought of her husband killing someone shouldn't sound so crazy, especially after being able to do it herself. But her Lee can't be a cold-hearted man who slept with whores, murdered people, and ruined people lives. He was so sweet to her, he wasn't always was, but his touch was so soft against her skin, how could he hurt anyone?

Y/n had just turned 19 when she met Lee. He was a deputy, closer to being the sheriff than either of them knew at the time. Their age difference scared her somewhat; she only gave him a chance so she could distract herself from reminding herself that she should be finishing up the last year of being a college freshman. She had the grades and thought her test scores were satisfactory but she got rejected from Indiana University. Her father told her that there is always next year, but her mother told her she should just figure out a new plan.

It was the uncertainty and loneliness that made her get closer to Lee. He was close to his late 20s, unmarried, and he didn't exactly make his loneliness unknown.

He left a sour taste in her mouth in their very first encounter; pulling her over as an excuse to get her number. She gripped the steering wheel to stop them from shaking so much. She only had her license for a few weeks and made sure to be careful in fear of this exact situation happening. His slick talk didn't make her feel that much better either. She was too shaken up to even look at him in the eye or take in any of his features. She just remembered seeing his badge the words DEPUTY SHERIFF etched into it.

Lee let her off, saying she had a "pretty face" and that he hoped to see her around. She didn't think much about their interaction the days after he pulled her over, but she began to see him more than before. Y/n couldn't remember a time she had seen him prior to that one night and found it odd that his face kept reappearing. (He later told her that it was fate, but it was not. Lee purposefully put himself in her orbit. It was not hard to learn what her routine was and when she went out.)

She was weary about his advances, unsure how to react to them because the most experience she's had was with two boys, only one of whom she kissed. Their first date was not by choice either, he just decided to stick by her side while she was at the local dinner by herself.

And he has always stuck by since then, always hovering around her until she realized he was not going to go away and it’d be futile to ignore him. Lee never gave her the chance to make the decision for herself, but his girl was so sweet and she just needed a few cushy words for her to understand that this was where she belonged.

"Do your parents know you're out here meeting me?" It had only been a matter of time before she learned to be very obedient to him; always accepting his plans, even if it meant sneaking out of the house in the midnight hour. The smirk he wore on his face every time he watched her walk up to him left her feeling enchanted.

"Don't talk too loud. If my brother hears you he'll kill you and have my head."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her front to him. Lee groaned at the feel of her breast against his chest. She was so nervous to do anything with him that she only let him kiss her. It was fine for a while, but he had grown tired of waiting. Tired of being teased by her in those soft, pink dresses that would ride up whenever she had to bend over even just a little bit. He couldn't believe how naive she was to believe he was always dropping things like a pencil or his wallet on accident; he just wanted to see her bend over for him just for a chance to peak at what pretty panties she wore that day.

Getting her to come out with him at night was surprising, but the idea of riding in his patrol car was so alluring. The sparkle in her eyes gave him an overwhelming sense of machismo; enough for him to realize he just needs to take what she wants.

The full moon hung in the clear sky and they had a vast, open field in front of them. He took her just to the edge of the county that was secluded and was his favorite spot to go for some quiet (or getting his dick sucked). The moonlight and a few street lights that were actually working were the only light they had.

"You look so pretty today baby," his hand rested on her thigh the whole entire drive but only now did he actually move it to stroke her skin, "you always look so pretty for me. I'm the luckiest man in town."

Y/n giggled and her face felt like it was burning up. No one had taken the time to compliment her sweetly, and that was obvious to Lee. He cradled her face in the palm of his hand and watched her turn into putty. His hand inches closer to her heat causing her to jump like his hand was made of actual fire.

"Relax baby...just relax for me," Lee planted his face in her neck and nipped at it. His lips tickled the skin on her neck and she did her best to suppress her giggles but they spilled from her lips. Lee smirked against her skin, "there she is. There's my girl."

She let a laugh slip through, but she suppressed the moan that was stuck in her throat. It was so odd to feel him on her neck but it was an unfamiliar feeling that she liked. His hand never left her thigh, in fact he had sneakily moved it closer to her sex. She felt ashamed about the growing wetness that she could feel sticking to her.

Lee grabbed her hand and placed it right over the bulge straining in his pants. She let out a heavy sigh when she realized what it was. "That's how hard you make me. You making me so fucking hard girl," he growled in her ears. This was something only the senior girls from her high school could dream about when they talked about hooking up with their boyfriends. None of them were even half the man Lee was, and here he was: hard and ready just for her.

"L-Lee," her voice broke into bits, her body overheating from Lee taking control, "wait, can we slow down?"

"You taste so sweet baby," he continued kissing her, ignoring her until she was pulling away from his grasp. "What's wrong girl?" The furrowing of his brow made her worry that she pissed him off. Lee was all she had, he convinced her to put away her dream of going to college and stay here for him, if she ran him off then she'd have nothing else.

"I'm just nervous. I’ve never done this before Lee," she hoped her honesty went a long way and would make him take her home instead. But all it did was make him readjust himself in his seat and pull away from her rather coldly.

Lee was irritated with her, she got him all hard, but he did his best to temper his anger. She's lucky that he was on the job all day and didn't have a chance to drink yet or else she'd see the side of him that he purposely hid from her.

"Don't be nervous baby. You know I love you right?" She nodded her head with her wide eyes holding a sad look in them, "good girl. Let me show you something."

Lee patted his lap and Y/n looked at him with apprehension.

"C'mon now," he patted his lap once again, this time with a bit of impatience in his voice.

Y/n awkwardly shifted over the center console of his patrol car and found herself in his lap. His strong arms wrapped around her waist and he rested his chin on her shoulder. She tried to ignore how his bulge poked at her slit through her cotton panties.

"You ever been in a car this nice before?"

"Uh-uh," she shook her head, somewhat distracted by the beautiful interior and his cock poking at her. The only car she's ever drove was the shitty one that was passed down to her. Lee's patrol car doesn't look like it's more than five years old.

Seeing her look in wonder at the dash made him even harder. He began to rut against her, trying to feel as much friction as he could, but it wasn't enough to satiate a man who has been waiting a few months for this.

He sat back and started fumbling with his pants. Y/n heard the sound of the metal on his belt and unzipping of his pants but she froze on top of him instead of moving. She grabbed the steering wheel and held onto it as tight as she did the night he first laid eyes on her. Her alarm rose when Lee lifted her up a little to push her panties to the side.

"Lee what are you doing-"

"Shhh baby don't worry, I got you."

The sensation of his head poking at her slit and her sliding down him was unspeakable. She was uncomfortable with his splitting size, but he didn't move her at all, trying to give her some time to adjust but it was just so hard for him to restrain himself. She was so tight and warm, and definitely untouched by any man. "Fuck," he mumbled warmly in her ear. She felt him wrap his arm tighter around her, almost as if he was afraid she was going to somehow run away from him. Even if she wanted to, she wouldn't know her way back home and she'd be stuck out here. She was safe with Lee even though she found herself feeling more confusion than pleasure.

Those girls from her high school days had to been lying to her, sex didn’t feel all that magical; his patrol car was not a romantic place to lose her virginity. Lee rocked her on his cock slowly as she tried to find the same pleasure that he was experiencing. His heavy breath was on her ear as she stared straight up into the night sky.

"You feel so good. You feel so fucking good baby."

His pleasure is what made her want to stay on top of him like this. She cared for him so much and she just wanted Lee to be proud of her. The "good girl" that continuously spilled from his lips sounded like a hymn she wanted to memorize.

Y/n let Lee have his way with her body. He groped her breast through her dress and then let his hands graze her sides. She wondered what he was doing when his hand slipped into her panties, but the warmth that shot through her made her mind go blank. Lee rubbed at her sensitive bud and she constricted around him. Instead of whimpering, she was now fully moaning; the way it felt so good had put her discomfort into the back of her mind.

"Oh fuck -- move your hips girl. You feel so good."

He rubbed her harder as a reward for swirling her hips against him. She began to bounce on top of him and he no longer had to do the hard work, just lean back and feel her engulfing him in her warmth.

"Lee," she whimpered, unsure of herself, but then she called his name again, "Lee," as if to let him know that he was the one giving her pleasure.

Lee knew he wasn't going to last, not when she was as tight and wet as she was. He can't remember the last time he took someone's virginity, nor when he was this hard. It was clear to him that she had no idea what she was doing by the way she bounced on him without a rhythm. Sometimes she'd stall herself before moving fast again. It didn't irk him, he found it endearing that she was so inexperienced. He was going to have to show her a lot of things and get her to fuck him to his liking.

Y/n gasped when Lee pulled out of her and jerked himself until white liquid was splashing on the back of her panties. She'd have to wash them before her mother saw the stain.

"You did so good baby, taking my cock like a big girl," he placed a sloppy kiss on her cheek, still trying to catch his breath while she shifted on top of him. He put himself away and nudged her towards the empty passenger seat. She was silent the entire time he drove her home. A sense of pride filled her because she had made Lee feel good. The sex itself was too weird to describe as being good, but she liked how she felt inside when he told her she felt good and that she made him cum. That's all she wanted to do was please Lee.

Saturday morning proved to be another beautiful day. It seems as if Summer didn't want to leave just yet even though October was near. There wouldn't be many more opportunities for Lee to make his impressions and sway the last few voters not on his side.

The event had been boring at most, but Sally's words really shook her up. No one in town would deny that Mrs. Blackwater has always been a bitter women, but they also wouldn't necessarily turn the other cheek if she starts going around saying that Lee Bodecker is a murder. Y/n's new problem made her forget about the decaying brothel owner. She doesn't care how mean the whole town thought the old woman was, she wanted her gone.

"You slept in. Did I tire you out last night?" Lee had the same smug smirk on his face that has been imprinted on her brains since their early years together.

Y/n nodded even though it wasn't completely truthful. She slept so hard because she's mentally spent and it was finally catching up with her body. Lee had been too distracted to notice how distant she was last night and how she is still distant now. In his eyes, as long as she was eager to lay under him then everything was fine.

Most mornings started like this: Y/n waking up next to her still tired husband and waiting to hear her daughter crying for her. He trudged out of bed and she heard him beat a path down the hall to the bathroom. There was still no sound of her daughter needing her, giving her some time alone. It was nearly silent except for the faint sound of the shower going. She breathed deeply and found herself feeling serene. Just five minutes without the memory of Sally threatening to pull her and her husband's support taunting her.

"Y/n! Do you not hear her crying?" Lee held a stern look on face, he must have been standing there for a few minutes. His towel was wrapped around his waist, stomach hanging over the soft white cotton, "what's wrong with you girl?"

She shook her head, "nothing Lee. I'm just still a lil' tired."

His face softened at her explanation but he nodded his head towards the door so she could take care of their daughter. Y/n hurried not to upset him for the rest of the day.

Their baby was just fussy and hungry. Her little eyes weren’t that red so she hadn’t been crying for long. “You hungry?” Her daughter somewhat understood what her mother was saying because her eyes went wide. The nightgowns Lee had bought Y/n made it much easier for her to pull herself out of them to feed their girl. She could see her daughter calming down, eyes closing once again. Y/n thought about keeping her daughter with her but she needed to rest in her crib. She placed her down gently as not to disturb and wake her again. At least one person in this family deserves peace.

"Back to sleep?" Lee's voice startled her, but the hand on her hip soothed her. Y/n nodded, never taking her eyes away from her girl. "Precious isn't she? So sweet when she's not fussin' about."

"She only fusses because she's teething, and she misses her father."

"Honey, you know why I'm at work longer than usual. It's for her. It's for you. It's for us. Do you know how much better her life, your life, is going to be better after I win that race?"

"But what if you don't win?"

Y/n rarely questions Lee, not even over small things, so he was confused as to why she was questioning him now. Did his wife not believe in him? She worried a lot, but when he first ran for sheriff, she was not this doubtful.

"What are you trying to say?"

"Lee, I didn't say that. It's just that people been talkin' and -"

"And you believe them? So my own wife doesn't think I'm going to win because a few people can’t got some things wrong?”

Y/n flinched as his voice got louder. The brashness of his voice woke their girl up from her attempt to fall into a deep sleep. Instead of waking up and silently looking around, the first thing that came from her was a cry. It served as a way for Y/n to escape Lee's wrath. She pulled her crying daughter into her arms and held her close to her chest. One glance at Lee's face and she knew he was going to deal with her later. But for now he just sighed and walked out of the nursery.

"Aww don't cry honey. It was just your daddy, okay? He's not mad at you sweetheart. Don't cry...don't cry," Y/n's voice cracked and tears slipped down her face. Her pleas were more for herself than they were her daughter.

Lee's hesitance to address the obvious problems he faces in regards to the election made Y/n feel uneasy. All she wanted was for her husband to just outright say he never did those things, but he never did. And if Y/n has resulted to murder, then she knows deep down that he did some of those things that people allege. There were just things that were too loud to drown out. The business when it came to solving a string of murders that happened a few years ago and people talking about him didn't affect him when he was going for re-election. There was no one else that had a strong enough presence to go against him and the folks in town figured that Lee gets enough done as far as crime goes, even though he could do more.

Y/n should be tired of trying to clean up his mess when he was so short with her. However it is not entirely his fault; he does not know. Maybe one day he'll learn and be grateful for what she has done for him.

Lee just couldn't stop reminding her that Sandy and Carl were coming over. It's almost as if he knew it got under Y/n's skin and used it against her after she hurt his feelings this morning. He's a sensitive one, even though he hides it well from most people, but her moment of vulnerability wasn't meant to hurt him. Though if their conversation had progressed any further, she might have spilled what she did to the brothel owner. She may want to believe Lee would be proud of her, but she cannot be so sure. It's sickening to assume that someone would be proud of a murder. She quickly began to feel dirty after a few minutes with her own thoughts ever since Lee snapped at her.

"Can you clean up? We're going to be having guests soon."

There were just a few baby toys on the floor but it was best not to make things worse with Lee (even though those toys were going to end up in the same place anyway).

Lee stepped outside as Y/n put their daughter in her high chair. Ever since her birth Lee was mindful not to smoke in the house; it was one of the house rules Y/n proposed that he was surprisingly very accepting of. She had taken away most of the things that he used to destress: alcohol, cigarettes, and candies.

She heard the motor of a car and Lee's muffled voice. She knew it was them, but hoped they were just making a short trip over. It's not like Lee likes Carl, and he's constantly complaining about his trouble making sister. Y/n hates that Sandy uses their daughter as an excuse to come over. She wouldn't mind if Sandy came alone, but she hated Carl around her little girl and she's sure Lee feels the same way.

Y/n's mother had gotten their daughter such a stupid gift when she was born. A baby that's not even half a year old yet didn't need a toy that had a million little pieces they could easily choke on, but of course it was her favorite thing to place with. Lee never cleaned up the mess, it was always Y/n who was doing it. She tried her best to pick everything up before they stepped inside but she heard the front door open. She tensed up, but she only heard the heavy footsteps of one person, and god did she hope it was Lee.

"What you doin' down there?"

Her eyes trailed up and Carl was gazing down at her. Words got caught in her throat and she clutched her hand around one of the toy pieces, the edges of it painfully digging into her palm.

"Did I scare you?"

The smirk on her face made her want to shriek. She noted that he didn't call her "darlin'" like he used to. She can only guess what Lee did to him when he "took him out back" after calling her that for a few years.

"Where's my niece?"

Y/n shot up, not caring about the toys still on the floor. She'll be damned if Carl is alone with her daughter for even a second.

Sandy came in with Lee following behind her. He gave Y/n a look of understanding, he too hoped this was going to be a short visit. The sound of Sandy fawning over her niece overtook the room. Their daughter giggled and babbled at her aunt as if she could understand her.

"Y/n go make us some ice tea."

Usually Lee doesn't command her to do things, unless he was stressed or horny. She knew her was the former by the look on his face. He was aggravated and this visit wasn't going to make him feel any better. As Y/n left the room, Sandy sat down on their couch with their daughter in her arms. Carl sat next to them, making the alarm in Lee rise.

"I got you something honey," she pulled out a little doll from her purse. It looked tattered and Lee wondered where she got it from.

"You know she already has enough dollies," Lee joked. It didn't matter to his girl, it was a new toy, "got anything for your brother?"

Sandy eyes him before pulling out a small bag of candy. She tossed it to him and he caught it, "I knew you'd ask for somethin'"

He opened it and instantly popped a sweet cherry candy into his mouth.

"Y/n's not letting me drink since the girl is so young. This is the only thing I got, even though she's on my ass about that too," Lee knew that Sandy wasn't too interested in the ins-and-outs of his everyday life but he gets tired of complaining to his deputies.

"Yea, I bet," she kept a snide comment about her sister-in-law to herself. The box of cigarettes she had calling her name we're going to have to wait. "How's that mayor race going?"

"It's going."

"Heard that whore house owner croaked," Carl's voice carried to the kitchen and Y/n paused, "found in unusual circumstances...chairs pushed up against the door...poisoned. Reckon one of those girls got tired of him holdin' them down-"

"No smoking in the house," Lee interrupted when he noticed Carl reaching for the pack of cigarettes in his shirt pocket. Carl laughed as if he wanted to challenge Lee, but his hand went back to resting on the back of the couch.

"Wouldn't want this little darlin' smellin' like a bar."

Anytime Carl spoke at or about her daughter, Y/n wanted to vomit. Carl is not nice. She wonders how twisted Sandy might be to marry someone who is awful to women and has no filter.

There was a cloud of fear over her head when Carl was around. She wishes Lee was more apprehensive but Sandy's his little sister, and he cares for her no matter how much those two causes. Things would be different if Y/n had told Lee about that time Carl pressed himself against and put his hand up the skirt of her dress. His threat would forever bounce off her skull and it only got louder when he was near. "Shut you're fucking mouth or else your husbands gonna see his slut wife bending over for another man." She was five months pregnant and had no way to defend herself. He only groped her, but she always wondered if he would've gone further if Sandy hadn't come in looking for the cooking tongs Lee told her to fetch. Sandy knew something had happened, but she said nothing. Y/n's disdain for her only grew from that day on.

Lee redirected the conversation from what Carl had started to something a bit more asinine. He didn't want to talk about something work-related because he didn't need to be stressed out any further. Reed’s death wasn't another blow to his reputation like Lee thought it would. It was going to be another unsolved murder from the way it was looking though. The people assumed one of the girls did it. The place had been emptied out; it surely looked different from when Lee was last in there. Lee was lucky that Reed was extremely disliked, unlike that preacher Roy who died some years ago. More people said "he had it coming" instead of "why isn't the sheriff doing anything?"

He laughed about it though. When he was alone in the car after leaving the crime scene, he laughed. There was no more worrying about the rumor that Sheriff Lee Bodecker beat one of his girls. When Lee did go to that place, he was never forceful. Lee could be mean towards women at times, but he was never violent.

If Lee was called in on a Sunday morning, then it was very important. He woke Y/n up at 5 am and kissed her out of her confused state to say goodbye. She only slept for another hour after laying her head down back on the pillow.

This morning felt so different.

The morning she woke up knowing her task was to deal with Reed, she was distracted and jumpy. But she had grown so accustomed to her guilt that it's become a comfortable feeling. Mrs. Blackwater was a more personal score to settle. That woman was throwing dirt on Lee's name, but the turmoil she caused her teenage friend would never leave her mind. Y/n had learned how cruel someone could be without physically hurting you. The boys on school grounds were annoying brats, but that woman had a truly awful mouth.

The Petersons’ daughter was over right after church. She had a wide smile on her face, happy that Mrs. Bodecker was giving her another opportunity to make some money.

"She's been a fairly good mood lately," Y/n handed her daughter off to the shorter teenage girl, "she slept through the night for once, but she's still gonna need a nap. Once she starts fussin' put her in her crib. I should be back before Lee."

Y/n wished her well and the Petersons girl wished Y/n a good time running her errands. It was comical to think of this as an errand, even though today she was going to treat it like one.

She was in Lee's nice car again meaning she was going to have to temporarily get rid of it. Y/n put much more effort into this, her haphazard plan to take out Reed could've gone horribly wrong. She spent her time snooping around town when she was out with one of her mom friends. The plan had been simple: park the car at the crowded grocery just two blocks away from the Blackwater house. The house sat at the end of the street, a bit separated from the other row of houses because of the larger amount of land they owned. It wouldn't be a problem to walk to the house seeing as others in this neighborhood do the same thing.

When her mother had made that dress for her to wear to the Spring Formal, Y/n cried, saying she was going to look like a nurse instead of "the prettiest girl in town" like Jim, the guy who asked her to the dance said. A teenage grievance had somehow come in handy almost a decade later. It was under a long coat that was a bit abnormal for this warm day.

Y/n felt sickly confident. That only thing she worried about was Lee cruising through and seeing his car in the parking lot. But the grocery store offered a great cover. The sun was covered by a thick cloud as she walked away from the grocery store and to the old Blackwater house.

That porch still looked the same. It was old and rickety, squeaking as she stepped on it, she's surprised it didn't give it away some years ago. The rocking chair Mrs. Blackwater sat on while terrorizing people was no longer there. At least her days of scaring off the newer generation of kids were over.

Y/n knocked on the door and waited. She had to knock again, and by the third time she wondered if the old lady did the job for her!

"Who is it?" The voice was much more frail, but it was that voice.

"I'm here to help!" The upturn of her voice at the end made her statement sound more like a question.

The locks on the door began to click and Mrs. Blackwater peered at her.

"You're not the one they always send."

"Oh, she's sick today! I'm just filling in for her today!" After two weeks of watching, Y/n learned what days Mrs. Blackwater's nurse came and went. She came everyday but she was absent on Sundays. It's somewhat astounding that Mrs. Blackwater didn't ask about Y/n turning up on a Sunday.

"Ahh whatever," she dismissed, unlocking the screen door, and wheeling backwards in the wheelchair that she had been relegated to a few years ago.

Y/n didn't know what to expect when she stepped inside, but it wasn't too far off from how her parent's house looked; black and white photos littering the walls and stacks of paper that probably could've been thrown away a decade ago. What is different from her parent's home is that this place is an utter mess. The nurse that usually comes to take care of her could at least tidy it up a bit. With how much she hated everything, Y/n would've assumed she hated mess too, but her home says otherwise. This lady was an absolute hoarder.

"Don't bother me," Mrs. Blackwater sniped at her. She wheeled herself next to the couch and glued her eyes to the black and white television screen.

Y/n doesn't know how many hours Mrs. Blackwater spent sitting there and watching The Andy Griffin Show. She didn't laugh when something funny happened, she just sat there still, sometimes grumbling to herself in reaction to what was happening on screen.

The least Y/n could do was tidy up a bit. It would be a kind gesture to leave her to die in a presentable place.

Mrs. Blackwater is not going to die a violent death. She was awful, but she did not deserve the brutality like someone who has done physical harm did. (If she was just a little bit braver, she would've hacked him to death, but the sight of blood makes her ill). Mrs. Blackwater was up in age, nearing her 90s, and it would be time for her to go soon anyway. Y/n dusted around the TV, one of the last things this old woman may see. All the photos of people on the walls were staring at her as she moved about cleaning the dust from the frames. So many people, many dead but most probably alive. Mrs. Blackwater had children and probably grandchildren but no one came to visit her. Her tongue was sharp, but how could no one come and visit their aging mother?

"Stop moving so damn much. Sit down girl."

The venom was still in her voice. It would never go away, at least not until she dies. This woman didn't appreciate anything and enjoyed being miserable. Y/n listened to her like that scared little teenager she used to be. She sat on the couch, a few feet away from Mrs. Blackwater who had not taken her eyes off the TV or moved at all. Y/n was spending time with a woman who was going to die at her hands today. If she's going to die then at least she's going to die doing what she loves; watching her shows and bitching out the closest person in reach.

She had only moved to grab the newspaper from the table on the other side of her. It was Friday's addition, Y/n could tell from the photo on the cover. She couldn't help but eye the old woman as she read the paper. It has been probably three hours and she hasn't even asked for anything to eat.

"People droppin' like flies in this shit hole."

Y/n's ears perked up, but she didn't say anything, she just let the lady talk.

"Leroy should know better not to do that shit here...especially with that corrupt sheriff around...would've had an easier time gettin' away with it in the city. Everyone in the city already does all that illegal shit so it probably wouldn’t have mattered anyway. Now he’s dead."

Y/n had heard that name before. She remembers vividly Lee chewing someone out on the phone and saying their name with contempt. Leroy, Leroy, Leroy. The name "Bobo" also came up in the conversation a few times. Y/n wanted to be mad at Mrs. Blackwater for referring to her husband as "corrupt" but something nagged at her to keep the conversation going for her sake.

"W-what do you mean?" Her voice cracked but it was ignored by the old woman.

"You must not be from here. Everyone knows that if you get caught up with that fat bastard sheriff you must be doin’ some awful shit. The only reason why he keeps gettin' re-elected is because everyone is scared of him. It doesn't matter how many babies that man has, he's a killer...dragging that man's body and fucking up carnations..."

No one had ever talked to Mrs. Bodecker about her husband like this. Town gossipers had the decency to wait until she left the room to say something about him. But she's not Mrs. Bodecker right now. It does not matter anyway because the old lady doesn't know what she's talking about. She hasn't spent the hours with Lee, with him being sweet and so soft with his daughter. Y/n firmly believes that if Lee did indeed kill someone then it was for a good reason. She knows her husband involves himself in dirty things, but it had to be for a good reason. Lee did not show brutality for no reason; he didn't get his rocks off on hurting innocent people.

"People can change. I'm sure he's a different man now."

"Why!? Because he got a bitch and a bastard? You are too naïve...at least the other girl they send has some more sense in her head. No man is going to want to marry a dumb girl."

An awkward silence surrounded them but it was mostly felt by Y/n. She found herself frozen with a ball of rage and anxiety in her stomach. But she had no time to dwell for much longer though.

"I'm thirsty...go make me something."

Y/n noticed Mrs. Blackwater flinching when she grabbed the remote to turn the volume higher. She either had arthritis or just pain in her hands.

"Okay...do you need to take any pills at this time?"

"My husbands gone and my children don't visit me. You think I care about taking my pills?"

Maybe Mrs. Blackwater would be kind to her if she knew Y/n was going to take her out of her misery. Breaking open the capsules and dumping it in the tea she made for her is going to do the job. She might succumb to a heart attack, or pass peacefully. The only person Y/n felt bad for was the poor nurse who was going to find her dead tomorrow morning.

Lee was able to leave his shift earlier than expected. Sundays are very quiet, the only thing he got up to was paperwork at the station. He could go home early to his wife, play with the girl while Y/n makes dinner, and get a nice ride from his wife while their daughter sleeps. Y/n said something about needing him to pick up some chicken stock from the grocery store.

People filled in and out of the grocery store as the sun began to set. A few people spoke to him, never for too long knowing that he's not fond of small talk. But more people being friendly with him was a good sign. Even without his sweet wife next to him, no one shied away from saying hello to the man running for Mayor.

Two boxes of chicken stock should be enough even though his wife sent him for three. The brand she likes isn’t exactly cheap. Lee promptly made his way to the cashier who greeted him with a smile.

"Good evening sheriff!" her voice was sweet and she batted her eyes a few times. Lee offered her a smile, but a small laugh escaped. This girl couldn't be younger than 20 but she fawned over him like a young school girl. Her behavior reminded him of Y/n when she was that age. "Darlene said she saw your car in the parking lot but didn't get a chance to catch Mrs. Bodecker herself."

Lee stopped caring about the items (a few snuck in there for him) being rung up. His brows furrowed and the girl realized that she had said something maybe she shouldn't have.

"My wife was here?"

"That's what Darlene said. Her shift ended right as I was coming in so I wasn't there when it happened...do you still want the chicken stock?"

"Yea yea just ring it up."

Lee's mind was too preoccupied with the weird behavior his wife has been exhibiting for the last several weeks. She often hovered over him when he was on the phone like she was interested in what he was talking about. All the swearing and terms she didn't understand kept her from asking what his loud, and often abrasive, phone conversations were about. But now she was listening a little too hard for his liking.

The only time Y/n was supposed to drive their car is if Lee told her she could or if there was an emergency. A trip to the grocery store did not fall under either of those categories. But it was particularly weird to him that she would go to the store when she told him to go himself. If she had forgotten something, she would have not hesitated to call the station. Something was up with her.

Everything felt normal as he stepped into the house. The smell of what she was cooking hit his nose and the familiar noises of his daughter babbling louder than the Y/n moving around the kitchen. If he had no questions for his wife, then he'd feel all warm inside walking into his home in this current state.

Y/n was talking to their daughter as if she was holding a real conversation with her. Their daughter started squealing when she saw Lee appear in the doorway. He put his index finger to his lips to tell her to quiet herself, but she was only louder.

"I couldn't believe it either! They said the hairdresser purposefully dyed Marie's hair darker," she spoke, thinking her daughter was just squealing because she was talking to her and not because her husband was creeping up behind her.

Hands snaked around her waist and she nearly jumped. "Oh yea? Is that what the town is gossipin' about today?" Lee's familiar voice soothed her and she turned around in his arms. She deftly kissed him and looked up at him.

"Wanna know what else I heard?" He whispered to her. Y/n nodded, a smile spreading on her face as she rested her forehead against his, "heard the sheriff's wife been out and about and driving his nice car."

Y/n's smile fell from her face, but it only made Lee smile wider.

"You wanna tell me what you were doing out?"

"I needed something from the store."

"So my task to pick up the chicken stock after work was for nothing?"

"No...I went to my parents house...didn't want to go empty-handed. You know how my mother gets."

What a sweet little liar.

But she still had the smell of an old house lingering around her so maybe it wasn’t completely a lie. Still, he knew something was up with her.

“How was work?” She quickly tried to change the subject. Lee was not really in the mood to interrogate her, it was Sunday after all. He sat down in the chair next to his daughter's high chair. She started reaching for his hat but he was too far away, so Lee rested his head on the tray and let her have her fun. Y/n was probably going to be mad at him for putting his head where she eats and getting all of his “outside germs” all over it, but he didn’t care.

“I’m tired,” he confessed, a heavy sigh escaping him, “I’m really fucking tired.”

Y/n wishes she could lift more of her husband’s burdens. Killing people who were talking about him did not get rid of the core problem. Sometimes she wishes he never decided to run for mayor. Life was so much more comfortable when he would run unopposed for county sheriff. Instead her husband had a bigger dream. From the very beginning she felt like it was a long shot that this would be successful, but they had gotten so far in changing how most of the people viewed Lee. And even though they felt a way about him, they still respected the sheriff.

“It’s going to be over soon. I promise.”

He truly wanted to believe her, but the sinking feeling that the past was going to catch up with him was not going away.

#lee bodecker #lee bodecker x reader #lee bodecker x you #lee bodecker x y/n #lee bodecker smut #the devil all the time #dark fic #lee bodecker fic #sebastian stan fic

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luci-in-trenchcoats · 3 years

Text

A Place To Call Home: Halloween

Summary: A casual Halloween night out for some drinks between the reader, TJ and Cody becomes anything but when the reader thinks she may have been drugged at a bar. When she calls Jensen for help, their relationship takes a fundamental change...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x foster daughter!reader

Word Count: 6,100ish

Warnings: language, drinking, drugging, angst, fluff

A/N: This part takes place after the Jensen’s Day timestamp. Enjoy!

______

“Trick or treat!” said Allie after your dad answered the front door in a batman t shirt.

“Well aren’t you the cutest little Elsa,” he said. He dropped a few big handfuls of candy in her bag and then a few more. He tickled Colin and got a laugh from him. “Colin you are the most adorable baby Yoda ever cutie and I gotta say...you ain’t a half bad Mandalorian, kid. You almost look tough or something.”

“It’s cause I’m a badass,” said TJ as he stuck out his chest.

“It’s cause you’re a nerd,” said your dad. You walked inside, Colin giggling as your mom stole him away without a second glance. “Nice costume though.”

“Y/N picked it out off some website or something,” he said. He sneezed and your dad shut the door. “God my allergies are killing me lately. Ragweed is horrible this year.”

“I know. De and I have been popping allergy meds the past few days,” he said. “You get it the worst.”

“Yeah but I started taking it like a week ago to build it up. I think it’s helping. Also, a bounty hunter and an adoptive dad? Mmm, peak man crush right there, babe,” you said, your dad rolling his eyes as TJ kissed your cheek.

“And what exactly are you supposed to be? A curtain?” teased your dad as you spun around.

“I thought I’d go another route,” you said. You took off your robe and he went wide eyed. “Soldier...girl?”

“Oh my God. You’re Solider Boy. That is so fucking cool!” he said as he looked you over.

“Jay, fuck’s a bad word,” said Allie.

“And we don’t repeat bad words, do we,” said TJ. “De’s got some more candy for you somewhere I bet.”

She took off up to the TV room and your dad walked around you.

“What do you think?” you asked. “Look real?”

“Okay that’s like good. Like real good. It’s just like mine from the show. Like even the shield looks the same.”

“It’s from the show. Kripke sent it to me. I know it’s a little big for my back but I couldn’t not use it,” you said. “I took a long shot and asked him on Twitter about it and he just like sent me the thing. He was really nice.”

“Good,” he said as he looked you over. “I am impressed. You guys might win your costume contest thing at whatever bar you’re going to.”

“I just want to go drink,” you said, TJ throwing an arm over your shoulders. “We’ll be back around eleven, midnight?”

“Go have fun. Mom and I’ll watch the babies tonight. Pick ‘em up in the morning,” he said.

“We didn’t pack bags for them,” you said. He stared at you and shook his head.

“You live a quarter of a mile away. We shall survive without you for one evening,” he said, pushing you both out the door. “Go have fun with Cody. I’ll see your hungover butts tomorrow, okay?”

“Don’t have to tell us twice.”

“Cody,” you said at the bar a few hours later. He finished off his drink and shook out his head. “Can you check on TJ? He’s been in the bathroom awhile.”

“Yeah. Order me another gin and tonic?” he asked.

“Can do,” you said. You hopped off your seat and paused for a moment, getting your bearings before you walked over to the bar. “Gin and tonic and another...graveyard…”

“Graveyard smash?” asked the girl behind the bar.

“Yeah. Another one of those. Oh and a bottle of bud,” you said. You handed over your card to pay, tucking it back in your shorts pocket. You brought the drinks over to the table, finishing off your margarita and the last of TJ’s old beer before you started sipping on the Halloween mixer.

It took about thirty seconds before you realized what you’d done.

“Fuck,” you said. You pursed your lips and took out your phone, biting your bottom lip before you dialed.

“You better be drunk calling me,” chuckled your dad. “What’s up, kiddo?”

“The guys are in the bathroom and I just drank from a glass that nobody was watching,” you said. You shut your eyes and felt a little off, not sure if it was because of the already decent amount of alcohol in you or something else. “What do I do?”

“Go to the bar and sit there and don’t move. The boys will be back soon,” he said. You tried to move but felt wobbly and sat back on your seat. “Y/N, don’t hang up on me.”

“Dad, I don’t think I can walk over there,” you said. “I’m drunk but...shit I fucked up.”

“Where are you?” he asked.

“Um, the uh...the place to the right of Jared’s.”

“Okay. Sit there. I’m gonna call…” he said as you stared down at the bathrooms. “Y/N. Answer me.”

“I think something’s wrong,” you said. “The boys are taking too long.”

“Cody is a police officer and TJ is tougher than he looks. They’re probably throwing up or something,” he said.

“TJ said he felt funny,” you said as you stared at his glass. “What if it was in his drink?”

“I don’t know but whatever you do, do not leave your spot,” he said.

“But it’s TJ.”

“Y/N I’m having a hard enough time not freaking out right now. Please do not move,” he said.

“Hey! Soldier boy!” said a guy walking by in a homelander costume. “Nice suit.”

“Can you do me a favor?” you said, the guy smiling as he leaned against your table. “My husband and friend went to the bathroom a long time ago and didn’t come back. One’s the Mandalorian and the other one is a zombie. Can you check on them for me?”

“Yes I can very drunk girl,” he chuckled. “I’ll be back.”

“Y/N, stop putting the phone down,” said your dad in your ear.

“Homelander’s going to look for the boys.”

“Your boys or The Boys?” he asked.

“Should I have clarified?”

“Just...I’ll be there soon. Don’t-”

“Boys!” you said, Homelander wandering back over with a very pale looking TJ and a wet Cody.

“I think your friends were puking in the alley,” said Homelander.

“Thank you so much,” you said. “You’re so sweet.”

“Mind if I get a pic? Your costume is kinda perfect,” he said.

“Not at all,” you said. You hopped off your seat and felt better. “Ah, okay. Just drunk.”

“Hm?” said TJ as you hung up your call and the other guy gave him his phone. “Hey there’s a starlight over there too.”

“Starlight! Come get your pic taken with the Seven, girl!” you shouted.

“She’s drunk,” said the homelander guy with a laugh.

“After three of those graveyard smash things? Oh for sure,” said TJ.

Half an hour later you were onto another drink and TJ was fanboying over star wars with another guy in a Mandalorian outfit. Cody was talking to the starlight chick who was maybe in a relationship with the homelander guy. They were at least mutually pining for one another if they weren’t already.

“Morris. Come on. I’m drunk and even I can tell Kayla Starlight over there is dying for you to ask her out,” you said. He shrugged and you cocked your head. “Oh come on.”

“She’s been my best friend since I was like four. Like, I can’t fuck up twenty something years of friendship if she’s...how fucked am I?” he asked as you smirked.

“So fucked,” you laughed. “Trust me. I was besties with my husband for years before we finally talked about it. Sometimes you just gotta-”

“Why the fuck haven’t you been answering your phone?” you heard your dad say. You spun around and gave him a smile.

“Is that the guy that played-”

“Walk away kid. Now,” growled your dad.

“See ya around, Y/N,” he said, Kayla disappearing with a wave with him. TJ spun around and your dad shot him a dirty look.

“What’d I do?” asked TJ.

“You three are glued to your phones yet tonight for some reason, you seem to have forgotten they exist. If you’d read a text then you’d know that she called me half an hour ago saying she thought she’d been drugged.”

“What?” Cody and TJ said, both of them staring at you.

“Fuck, Y/N I thought someone took you,” said your dad. You opened your mouth and he shook his head.

“She’s just drunk,” said TJ.

“Well thanks for the update. You could have answered your phone,” he said. He glared at you and shook his head. “Don’t ever do that again.”

He left the bar and you slid off your seat, jogging outside, telling the boys you’d be back in a minute. There were a lot of people out for a Friday night and it took a second to find him in the crowd.

“Dad,” you said. You caught up with him as he walked down the sidewalk. You tugged on his arm and the man spun around, very much not your father. “Sorry. I thought you were someone else.”

“Nice costume,” he said and you stepped back into another body, your head swimming. “You gonna puke? Alley’s over there.”

You turned your head and jogged around the corner, spitting up your stomach with a big heave. You wiped off your mouth and sighed, getting up to your feet. There was a shove on your back and you got pushed further into the darkness, falling onto the dirt and gravel. You spun around on your bottom and saw the guy from before.

“Be more careful, kid. You’re tripping there.”

“You pushed me,” you grumbled as you stood up, picking up a rock in your fist as you went.

“You’re on something. You got that look in your eye,” he said. You narrowed your eyes and he walked forward, close enough for you to whack him in the head with the rock. He swore as he fell down and you ran back onto the street, jogging away until you got to a street corner and saw a familiar back of someone’s head.

“Dad,” you said, tugging on his jacket, relieved to find it was him this time. “Dad, there was-”

“I don’t want to speak to you right now,” he said. You swallowed and stared at him, his face hard.

“Dad. I-”

“You never hang up the phone with me when you call me like that ever again, do you understand?” he said. You stared at him and his jaw clenched. “Of course you don’t. You’re drunk.”

“Dad I’m not. I-”

“You smell like vomit,” he said with a scoff. You turned around and saw the man from before hanging back, shooting you a look. “Go back to the bar, Y/N.”

“Dad-”

“Would you just go?” he shouted.

“Dad don’t. I need-”

“For fucks sake. Just go away.”

You let go of his arm, tears welling in your eyes.

“Grow up,” he said. You stepped back, watching him walk across the street.

“D-Daddy,” you said. He stopped in the crosswalk and looked back at you, his gaze following yours over to the man. The man saw him look at him and took off back towards the bars when he saw your dad scowling. Your dad jogged back over to you, tensing when you took a step back from him.

“No one’s gonna hurt you,” he said. He stepped closer and you squeezed your eyes shut. “Y/N. What’s wrong?”

“I feel funny and I’m drunk and I’m scared and I’m scared of you,” you breathed out. “You were gonna leave me alone.”

“Y/N-”

“You said you wouldn’t leave me alone,” you said. You stumbled over to a nearby wall and slide down it, your head in your hands. “Don’t leave me alone. You promised. You said so.”

“Okay,” he said as he sat down beside you. He kissed the top of your head and you heard him shudder. “You’re okay, munchkin, I promise.”

“How are you feeling this morning?” asked the doctor that walked into your room.

“Tired,” you mumbled. TJ and Cody were there in their own stalls, still in their costumes, your dad out in the hall talking to someone.

“Your blood alcohol content was up there,” he said. “Especially you, Y/N.”

“I want to go home,” you groaned.

“You’ll be discharged shortly,” he said. You grumbled and half an hour later you were signing something that you could leave.

“Y/N,” said your dad as you walked away from the nurses station. You glanced over your shoulder, glancing down until he came over. “We need to talk about last night.”

“No we don’t. We got too drunk. I fucked up. Lesson learned,” you said. You started to head out and he grabbed your shoulder. “Jensen let go.”

“Y/N,” he said, spinning you around. He opened his mouth and you crossed your arms, shrugging him off. “I made a mistake.”

“I had to beg you to help me. I called you daddy I was so scared,” you said. He shut his eyes and you growled. “Look at me.”

He snapped his eyes up, his eyes a little red already but you were too angry to care.

“The only other time I’ve ever called you that, I thought you were dead on that road. I thought...I thought there was absolutely...I was drunk and maybe drugged and your reaction was to get pissed at me, at us, for not answering phones. A man tried to attack me and I got away because my dad told me to grab whatever I could if I was ever in that situation. There you were, the safest place in the world, the safest I could ever feel after something like that happened and you told me to go away. I was terrified and you could see it on my face and you left me. You made me beg for you to help me. I don’t know who the fuck you were last night but you were not my father. You’re Jensen again until he decides to come back.”

“Y/N,” he said quietly. “I’m sorry.”

“Congratulations. You’re just like every other foster father I ever had.”

He stared at you and you turned around, walking past both TJ and Cody.

“Y/N,” said TJ and you kept walking. “Y/N. Jensen, she didn’t mean that.”

“Yes, I did. Let’s go TJ.”

One Week Later

The doorbell rang and you rolled your eyes, TJ walking past the couch and away from the door.

“TJ, can-”

“Tell him yourself,” he said, going to his office and slamming the door. You glared at it before going to the front door. You opened it quickly, your dad standing there in his raincoat and swallowing thickly.

“Is this about work?” you asked.

“No,” he said quietly.

“Then get off of my property.”

“Y/N-” he said as you slammed the door shut in his face. He rang the doorbell again and you ripped it open. “Honey-”

“I’m not your honey or kiddo or tall munchkin or anything, Jensen. This is me telling you that I want you out of my life,” you said. He lowered his head and you heard him sniffle. “I don’t give a fuck about if you cry. Get out of our lives. Stay away from my family.”

“I’ll do whatever you want me to,” he breathed out, forcing his head up. His eyes were red and puffy, face tired like it’d been that way for days. “I’ll do whatever you want. I promise.”

“You humiliated me,” you said, stepping outside and pulling the door shut. “I thought you loved me.”

“I do,” he said. “I love you so much you-”

“You don’t even know. Boo fucking hoo,” you said. He stepped back and looked small, rain dripping down on him now. “The real world sucks. Get used to it.”

“I made a mistake. Please,” he said. “Y-you don’t have to forgive me. You can...just let me try. Please. We’ve always tried. P-please let me try.”

You stared at him, watching him look down, watching him debate getting on his knees.

And it dawned on you what you’d done. What you’d said.

“Y/N, Y/N, honey,” said TJ. You looked up from the floor of your bathroom, your dad knelt down on your other side. “Honey, look at me.”

He grabbed your face and you felt wet tears streaming steadily down your cheeks.

“What happened?” you asked. “I was on the porch and now I’m here?”

“You were talking to your dad outside and he said you just...fell over crying.”

“Something’s wrong with me,” you said. You shut your eyes and TJ looked around.

“I’m gonna call the doctor,” he said. “Jensen can you keep an eye on her?”

“Of course,” he said. He kept his distance and you sniffled, opening your eyes. He looked down when you met his eyes and you started to cry.

“I’m sorry,” you said. You grabbed his arm and sat up on your knees, giving him a big hug. “Dad I’m so sorry. I love you. Please forgive me. Please. Please. I’m sorry. I want to be your daughter. I want my dad back. Please.”

“I wasn’t going anywhere,” he said. He relaxed and felt like himself again, your head resting on his shoulder.

“Uh, guys?” asked TJ. You lifted your head up, TJ holding up his phone. “Y/N, I think I know why you freaked out on Jensen so bad.”

“How would the doctor know that over the phone?” asked your dad.

“There’s a recall out on a certain allergy medication warning people not to take it according to this headline,” said TJ.

“Why would-”

“It’s not allergy medicine. It’s an antipsychotic drug. They mixed up the pills during manufacturing. Apparently if you give those to people that don’t need them, it fucks with their heads,” said TJ.

“You take them too,” you said as TJ nodded, your dad quiet. “Dad you and mom do-“

“I think we all better go to the hospital and get checked out. Right now.”

“How do you feel?” asked your mom a few hours later.

“My head feels normal again,” you sighed from your hospital bed. You opened your eyes, her hand running over your head. “Did I fuck it up. With dad. I think I broke it. That thing we had and it’s never going to fix back the same way.”

“You were on a very strong antipsychotic without you knowing. We are lucky all you had was some anger and a few delusions. It could have been much worse,” she said. “Daddy’s not mad, sweetie.”

“Mom I’ve never seen him like that. I was so…”

“Wasn’t just you,” he said as he rounded the corner into the room. He was out of his clothes and in a pair of pants and a plain t shirt now, holding up the bracelet on his wrist. “Why’d I have to get all the crying? I would have rather have been pissed off like you got.”

“Your test came back positive?” asked your mom.

“Yeah. So far that’s Y/N, me, TJ, Cody. The younger kids don’t seem to have it thankfully since they take the kid version. They want you to get tested though,” he said.

“But mom’s been normal,” you said as you sat up.

“Well…” he said as she rolled her eyes. “Mom’s been a little...aggressive in-”

“Don’t need to know,” you said. He chuckled and he took a seat on the opposite bed, your mom heading out. They hooked him up to an IV to clear out his system and he took a seat beside you on the bed. You looked down, getting a bump on the shoulder. His hand as on his lap, palm facing up and you smiled.

“Thatta girl,” he said as you rested yours in it. “Gonna take more than some antipsychotics to tear us apart.”

“You are the greatest foster father I’ve ever had and arguably the kindest human being I’ve ever known,” you said. He was quiet and you took a deep breath, looking across the room. “You protected me, even when you were being affected by this. I want you to forget everything I’ve said from Halloween night on. It wasn’t true. Not a second of it.”

“Was the daddy part true?” he asked. “The accident.”

“I expect you to protect me when TJ’s not around. I expect it when he is too to be honest. I spent a long time protecting myself. I was scared on that road. You couldn’t protect me. You couldn’t protect me from watching you almost die. I know how life works and that parents are not invulnerable. They get hurt. They get angry. They make mistakes. They’re human. But I’ll always be your child and on a rare occasion, I’ll need my fucking daddy to tell me it’s okay and I’ll believe him. I’m sorry for hurting him so badly.”

“You are still as ridiculous as the day you walked in your room and told me not to bother with you,” he said, tucking your hair behind your ear. “You can hurt me. You can destroy me. You can ruin me beyond repair. You’re the only thing that puts me back together though. Heals the wounds so I forget they existed. I’ve been broken before. More than you know. I am sure I will fall apart again too. But these small creatures I call my children fix all of that. The girl who ran away, who was afraid of me, she just told me I make her feel safe. I protect her. So I’m sorry but I won’t forgive you since there’s nothing to forgive. You weren’t yourself and neither was I yet you still pushed past it and realized this wasn’t normal for us. Maybe some people fight and some families would have let it go but we know we don’t stop trying in this family. Even when we’re all a little off. I’m proud of you.”

“For what?” you said quietly. He fixed your hair again, playing with it for a moment. He tickled the back of your ear and you giggled. “Dad.”

“Giggles never hurt either,” he said. He threw his arm over your shoulders and pulled you in close, kissing the top of your head. “You’re not that scared kid anymore, Y/N. You’re never gonna be her again. You’re strong. Even now, I know this will bother you for a little while but it won’t change anything. We’ll be even better if that’s possible.”

“You were begging me at the house,” you said.

“Could have gotten that new bronco you’ve been looking at. Sounds like you lost out,” he chuckled.

“Dork,” you said as you hugged him.

“I’m sorry for how I acted that night at the bar too. I’ll never do it again. I promise to not leave your side if you ever call me for help. Not for a second.”

“Dad you don’t have to apologize.”

“I’m bigger than you. I get to force this apology,” he said. “Am I forgiven?”

“Always,” you said. You saw a guy go past in the hall and you went wide eyed. “That’s the guy from the alley!”

“Hey,” said your dad with a smile as you got up. He walked out with his IV, you on his tail as the guy turned around with his doctor. The man looked at you and shook his head. “You’re the dickhead that tried to hurt my daughter aren’t you? I thought that was you.”

“Ew,” you said, looking at the infected cut on his head. Your dad moved forward and you caught his arm. “Um, maybe we can call the police?”

A security guard at the nurse’s station got up and the man sighed, your dad narrowing his eyes.

“I was only gonna kill him a little,” he said. The man stared and your dad cocked his head. “I’m hopped up on anti-psychotics buddy. I can be very creative.”

“Dad,” you said, dragging him back into the room. “Let the police handle it.”

“I did get a little too happy about fantasizing over that,” he said as he sat down. You rolled your eyes and took a seat, laying back on the bed.

“Am I too big for a cuddle?” you asked.

“Nope, especially not in the hospital,” he said. He sat back and you rested your head on his shoulder. “Where is that husband of yours anyways?”

“I think he’s on the phone with the lawyer trying to sue or something,” you said. “Let him wander the halls and get it out of his system.”

“Excuse me?” You both turned to look at the door. “Hi. I’m Morris Harrison with Richmond...Solider Boy?”

“Homelander?” you said as Morris shook his head. “Uh, hi?”

“Hi. I uh, I’m a lawyer at Richmond and Associates and we’re working the class action against the pharmaceutical manufacturer. I got a call about more cases,” he said, handing over a business card.

“We’ll be getting the family lawyer in contact with you rest assured,” said your dad. He nodded and looked away. “You okay?”

“Morris this is my dad, Jensen. Dad this is the nice boy from the bar you shouted at,” you said.

“To be fair, I was mentally impaired...and I mean come on, Homelander? Gotta be careful of those,” he smirked.

“I was actually gonna be…” he said, shaking his head. “Sorry.”

“You and Kayla were gonna be Sam and Dean! Oh yeah. Now I remember,” you said.

“I like the new friend,” chuckled your dad.

“I’ll see you guys around sometime. Maybe a little less drinking this time?” said Morris.

“Yeah. Text TJ. We’ll get together,” you said. “Oh. I gotta ask. How’d the Kayla situation work out?”

“We have our sixth date tonight,” he said. You grinned and he rolled his eyes. “You’re alright drunk girl.”

“Later Homelander,” you said with a wave as he left.

“He was nice,” said your dad. “Did I really shout at him?”

“Yeah. I think he’s a fan so thank you for being nicer this time,” you said.

“Well...at least you made a few new friends out of this experience?” he said. “Silver lining?”

“I will take a quiet, happy day for now,” you said.

“Me too, kiddo.”

Three Days Later

It was after ten when you slipped inside your parents house. It was a little dark, your siblings all at sleepovers. You poked your head around a corner, your dad in the kitchen mixing two cocktails together. He lifted his head up, cocking his head.

“Y/N?” he asked as you stepped out from around the corner. “What are you doing here?”

“I know you and mom got the house to yourselves so I’ll only be a minute,” you said.

“Uh, what?” he said as you walked over and gave him a hug. He returned it and ran his hand over your head. “Y/N. I know you didn’t mean what you said. You can stop apologizing. Please.”

“I know,” you said.

“Alright then,” he said. “I’ll take free hugs anytime.”

“Dad.”

“Yeah?” he asked as you squeezed him hard. He returned it and you smirked as you looked up. “What are you up to?”

“Can I show you something?” you asked. He nodded and you pulled him with you towards your old room, back to being one for guests. You walked him inside and sat him down on the bed as he watched you. You went over to the closet and turned on the light reaching up top into a shoe box. You took it down and walked it over, handing it to him.

“What’s this?” he asked.

“My dad’s kinda sappy and he writes me these letters,” you said. He rolled his eyes but smiled, putting his hands on top. “I started writing back. I put them in this box and figured one day you’d find them. But I know it wouldn’t hurt for you to maybe peek a look now after everything.”

He nodded and smiled, freezing when he took off the lid.

“Y/N...how many letters is this?”

“A boxful?” you said. “I maybe write them with more...frequency than he does. They are dated and hopefully in order.”

He picked out the first one and shut his eyes. You bit your bottom lip and he took a deep breath.

“This is from four days after your seventeenth birthday.”

“Every time I went to therapy I wrote one. Some are for mom but your names are on the envelopes.”

“Why does this one say dad?” he asked, holding up the first one. “I wasn’t dad for years.”

“Oh we both know you were my father the first day I stepped foot in here,” you said. “I could pretend to a piece of paper. It was safe. It wouldn’t hurt me. I started calling you dad in my head a very long time ago. I just didn’t say it in case you didn’t want me to be your daughter in the end.”

He put the envelope back in the box and carefully put the lid on, tucking it by his side. He wiped off his face with the back of his hands and looked up at you.

“Next month you turn twenty eight. You’ll have been with us for a hair over eleven years. This last year...the accident...TJ and his dad...now this...you’re the adult more lately than I am.”

“Dad I’m almost twenty eight like you said. But my head still feels...younger. You’re fifty one. But you still probably think of yourself as a twenty year old kid.”

“You are learning the secrets of adulthood after all,” he said, wiping off his face again. “Y/N...I have this fear when it comes to you. It’s only you. I understand why. But it’s a fear I’ve lived with for quite a long time. It’s a fear I thought came true earlier in the week.”

“She was a bitch that didn’t know better.”

“Don’t call yourself a bitch,” he said, sounding young, shaking his head. “You’ve always been tougher than me. I put on a good act but I’m...I’m privileged and I’ve had an easy life and even that seems hard sometimes. I couldn’t be you. I’m not strong enough. I’m not strong enough to erase the fear that I had, that lingered.”

“What are you afraid of?” you asked as you sat down on the bed.

“I have always loved you. But there was a time you didn’t love me and it took a while before it was unconditional. I’ve always had this fear that I would fuck up and hurt you, make you not love me anymore and that’s selfish of me. I know it is. But I can’t lose you. It just...I was broken last week. Like somebody ripped part of my soul out and it was gone forever. I’ve dealt with grief and death and heartbreak and nothing has ever hurt like that. The drugs did all that I know but...I would have done anything to get you back. Anything. And this girl, this amazing young woman, she writes me letters. She’s been writing me letters for eleven years. I never had to be afraid of you either, did I.”

“No,” you said. “But it’s okay. Boys are allowed to get scared too.”

“Your parents did a pretty good job with you,” he said.

“Yes. I think the four of them did too,” you said.

“I didn’t raise you.”

“Yes you did,” you said. You shoved a hand in your pocket and pulled out an envelope, handing it to him.

“Another for the box?” he asked.

“I already snuck today’s in there,” you said. “This is different.”

“What is it?”

“Just open it.” He untucked the flap and laughed, pulling out the sheet of paper. “TJ thought it was cute.”

“An IOU to tag along whenever I’d like when you go out drinking,” he chuckled. “I’m gonna need several hundred more of these while you’re at it.”

“How about like three?” you said.

“I will settle for you calling me if you think you’re in trouble,” he said. You nodded and he rested his head on your shoulder. “Even drugged up you still did that.”

“Well, the drugs didn’t kick in really until that night. Having allergies sucks,” you said. “You get the runny nose and itchy eyes and the crazy stuff. So not fun.”

“Nope,” he said, giving you a hug. “I was totally gonna have sex with mom all night but now I got all these letters to read.”

“Oh God, gross,” you said, shuddering as you stood up. He laughed and lay back on the bed, giggling as you shook yourself off. “I don’t need to hear about your nasty sex life.”

“I have an incredible sex life. Like so much-”

“Goodbye father,” you said as you walked out of the room.

“You don’t even want to know how often if I’m being honest,” he said as you walked quickly to the front door. He cracked up and you groaned. “Night, kiddo.”

“Night, dad. Enjoy your letters.”

You woke up around three in the morning, rolling over in bed and catching a few texts on your phone. You lifted your head and saw they were from your dad, a smile growing across your face.

I read the last letter first. All I gotta say is you never have to worry about me going away, no matter how much you scream and shout. You’re stuck with me forever, kiddo. Not even strong medication can tear that apart. Nothing can.

Also, for the record, I get to be the sap in this relationship, not you. Box full of cards. Do you know how hard it is to one up that? Do you? Keeping me on my toes kid. I’m sure I’ll come up with something though.

Love you tall munchkin.

“Something wrong?” mumbled TJ. You put your phone down and shook your head.

“Not at all,” you said. You tucked in close to his side, TJ rolling to his own and tucking your head under his chin. He hummed and rubbed your arm, kissing the top of your head. “Love you.”

“Love you too, honey.”

________

A/N: Read the Dads timestamp here!

#spn #supernatural #jensen x daughter!reader #rpf #au #spn reader insert #supernatural reader insert #reader insert #spn fanfiction #jensen x

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jelly-pies · 3 years

Text

Dancing From Now On

Read on AO3

Pepper remembered their first dance. Contrary to public knowledge, it had not been at the annual Stark Industries gala.

Tony and Pepper's first dance took place months before that, alone at the mansion, late after a long day of work. The music had been Pepper's idea, to relax. But the dance had been Tony's.

"Getting better, Potts." Somehow cheerier than usual, he spun her slowly around the workshop. "Nobody will ever know you had two left feet. Hardly believe it myself, if my toe wasn't still throbbing."

Pepper huffed. "Not all of us could afford dance classes, you know."

"Well, it's not that hard, see? We're just swaying." Tony pulled her in, an inch closer, meeting her eyes. And for one moment, Pepper was purely dancing with the friend she was secretly in love with—not the boss who depended on her, or the playboy whose one night stands she escorted out of the mansion every few weeks. Just Tony. "Just dancing."

Their casual flirting was one thing. But this was getting dangerously close to something else—so Pepper ended the moment. JARVIS stopped the music, and when Pepper looked back after collecting her things, Tony suddenly looked away as if he'd been caught staring.

Maybe he had.

"So, you're good?" Tony asked casually, hands fiddling with some tools he picked up. "No stumbling over anybody's feet at the next gala?"

"We're good." Pepper matched his light tone. "Thank you, Mr. Stark."

"You're very welcome, Ms. Potts."

"And Tony... " She paused at the door. Did she imagine that expectant look he sent her way, or was it just the lighting? "Um… that contract you still have to look over. Don't show up tomorrow without it."

"Which one?"

"Tony."

He chuckled. "I got it. Have a good night."

Maybe it was just the lighting.

"Good night," Pepper answered, and exited the room with deliberate steps.

She turned back before the landing. Tony was facing away, bringing up holo-screens, flexing his hands—and suddenly she remembered the feel of those calloused fingers against her own, drawing her closer.

Tony looked up. Pepper turned away, determined not to be caught staring.

But maybe she had.

Pepper remembered their first dance. And she remembered how it led to much, much more.

Their second dance, that one was at the Stark Industries Firefighter's Family Fund benefit. A backless blue gown, a little banter, an almost-kiss on the roof. Another moment Pepper ended before anything could begin, even though she half-wished something would begin—had been wishing it those dreadful three months of Tony's disappearance.

As Tony left to get them drinks, Pepper turned away to hide a growing blush. She didn't see the way he looked back at her from the door.

Tony reentered the building, and didn't see the way Pepper looked after his retreating back, either.

Years later on another rooftop, after a disastrous Stark Expo, the kiss became real.

They even had a witness, who deadpanned, "You guys look like two seals fighting over a grape."

Tony put his arm around her as they faced Rhodey, and Pepper couldn’t help thinking how that gesture must make them look like a real couple. She found she didn’t mind. All of a sudden, plans of her resignation as CEO didn't seem so urgent.

Tony turned back to her as soon as Rhodey left and challenged, "How are you gonna resign if I don’t accept?"

Pepper laughed, letting the action release her anxiety and near-death stress and girlish romance. "I…" And Tony was leaning close. She stopped him with a finger on his lips. "Tony, if I don't… we can’t…"

"Come on, it’s us. We’ll figure something out." And there was that look again. Pepper wasn’t so quick to blame the lighting this time. "Ms. Potts?" Tony took both her hands. "Pep?"

It was too late to stop this moment, and Pepper knew it. But the doubt must have still shown on her face because Tony took one look and continued, "Remember when we danced? The first time, Malibu? You crushed my toes about a hundred—"

"Please let that go."

"—but we made it work."

Pepper took a breath. "We did."

Tony smiled, eyes shining—that's how Pepper could always tell if his smiles were real. She could also tell that both of them were done holding back… whatever this was.

"We are pretty good at dancing," Pepper replied.

Tony couldn't see her face as they embraced, but if he did, Pepper was sure he could tell her smile was real, too.

A private night at Stark Tower after the New York attack, that was the third dance. Or fourth, or fifth, maybe. Pepper wasn't sure she needed to count anymore.

She was only sure of two things. Swaying together in their home, with JARVIS playing soft music overhead, her arms around the love she had almost lost—and had accepted she would come close to losing, over and over again, for the sake of saving the world—Pepper was only sure of these: that she wanted herself and Tony to have a thousand more dances to come.

And that she could never know which one would be their last.

They danced that night on yet another rooftop, after the events with the Mandarin.

They didn't dance after Ultron.

Or for several months after that.

But the next time Pepper and Tony finally held each other in their arms, they held on tighter, and neither let go for a long, long time.

This wasn't how Pepper imagined it, for several reasons.

Tony’s smile was different. There was a sadness in them that lingered like ashes, but he smiled anyway, holding her close—which was a feat with Pepper's growing belly, but they made it work.

There were fewer guests. Several seats they left vacant on purpose, scattered around the lakeside like lonely souls. Some people held the belief they were there, in spirit, and that's what mattered. Pepper wasn't so sure; pure sentimentality had prevailed on her to leave the seats out.

Apparently sentimentality ran high this evening. The band played the song she and Tony had first danced to, oh so long ago, in a mansion long since blown to bits, by an AI, a friend, long since gone.

There was no publicity in what had once been anticipated as the event of the decade. A single ray of sun through gray clouds instead of all-around sunshine, in what was supposed to be the happiest day of Pepper and Tony's life.

But the people they loved—those that were left—celebrated with them, and that was enough. A simple reception at their new house, and the wedding was over.

After the lake grew quiet and the stars came out, the newlyweds slow-danced through the night, just the two of them.

This wasn't how Pepper imagined their new life would start. But start it did, with a dance.

"Getting better, Potts," Tony whispered beside her temple, their heads pressed together.

"Not so hard without the floor length gown. I know that was my idea, but God, don’t let me do anything like that ever again."

Tony chuckled and spun her slowly until she faced away, then wrapped his arms around his wife, their four hands interlocking on top of her belly.

Pepper had long lost count of their dances. But she knew this was one she would always remember.

It was Tony who broke the silence. "You guys still here? Scoot."

Pepper turned where he was looking: Rhodey’s wedding presents on the mantelpiece, staring at them—two plushie seals. And she laughed. Tony could always make her laugh.

“Fighting over a grape?” Pepper recalled.

“I never really got that image, to be honest.”

“Hm.” She turned back to Tony, cupped his cheek, and leaned in. “Let’s see about that.”

"That’s it! You’re doing it!" Tony spun their daughter around until the song ended, and Morgan collapsed in giggles on the floor. Tony scooped her up and tickled her with his stubble, making the giggling grow louder.

"Dad!" Morgan laughed. "Mommy, save me!"

Pepper swiftly rescued the toddler, only to drop her on the couch and blow raspberries on her stomach a second later. "In this house—" another tickle, and Morgan squealed— "nobody—escapes—dancing!"

Morgan finally succeeded in pushing her away as FRIDAY started the next upbeat song, and soon all three were back on their feet.

“Not that it's a competition.” Tony walked in. “But she loves me three thousand.”

“Oh, does she?”

“You were somewhere on the low… six to nine hundred range.”

Tony could always make her laugh.

Even the night after the Avengers came to visit. The night their new life, that Pepper knew in her heart could never last long, started to melt away.

Tonight there was no music, no dancing. Only the crackle of the fireplace, the weight of the future, and Pepper’s words hanging in the air— "But will you be able to rest?"

Tony didn’t answer her. He didn’t need to.

But Pepper held his hand, and Tony kissed her cheek. And when they finally went to bed, they held each other tighter.

Tony held her hand, and Pepper kissed his cheek. "You can rest now."

Tonight there was no dancing.

Two cylindrical compartments stood along the garage wall, one of them forever to be empty. In the other, Pepper put her Rescue suit away by herself. Crossing the room, her fingers couldn't help lingering over Tony's reserve helmet—Tony's desk—Tony's tools—Tony's presence. She could always feel it in his workshops.

Their first dance had been in his workshop.

The memory jolted her, pulling Pepper's eyes back to the last gift Tony left: her Rescue suit slumped in its compartment, looking as battered as she felt. Pepper remembered what it was like to take the suit to battle. To fight side by side with her husband, gauntlets firing in sync, guarding each other's back. A team to the end.

Did that count as a dance? Because otherwise, Pepper realized, she didn't remember the last time she and Tony danced.

She remembered their first, though—would always remember it. JARVIS’s song, their wedding song, strained in her ears—she could almost feel Tony's calloused fingers around hers—dancing in his workshop late at night.

But in this workshop, on this night, Pepper could only cry.

Pepper still danced.

She danced with Rhodey, and they leaned on each other, the way they had learned to do long ago.

She danced with Happy, bouncy little head bangs as they cooked Christmas dinner together, and for a moment the house was full of music again.

She danced with Peter, years later at his wedding, whispering "We’re so proud of you" in his ear.

She danced with her daughter. Morgan always pulled her to her feet whenever a lively song came on the radio— "In this house, nobody escapes dancing!" And they laughed. And they danced.

Pepper still danced. Just not with the one person she most wanted to dance with again.

When years had passed, and Morgan was grown, and the house was quiet most hours of the day, Pepper developed the habit of sneaking out on the balcony on clear nights, and looking up at the stars.

Some of her favorite dances with Tony had taken place under the stars. Like the rooftop. And their wedding.

Pepper didn’t remember which dance had been their last. But she remembered the first. And the second. And the thousands that came after that. Maybe that was enough.

In the quiet of the lake house, with only the strains of their wedding song echoing in her ears, and the stars above her, forever her witness—Pepper danced.

- "Ang Huling El Bimbo (The Last [Dance])," The Eraserheads

Lahat ng pangarap ko'y bigla lang natunaw

Sa panaginip nalang pala kita maisasayaw

(All of my dreams are suddenly gone

Only in dreams can we dance from now on)

#THIS IS ENDGAME COMPLIANT BTW #pepperony #pepper potts #tony stark #mcu #fanfic #angst #character death tw #did I have 3+ other wips I started first and wanted to finish first? yes #did I dump my endgame feels on this angsty one-shot instead? also yes #jelly's

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teamhappyme · 3 years

Text

a series of promising events (2/5)

aaron hotchner x female!reader

word count: 10.6k (yeah i have a spacing problem)

a/n: part 2 of this series is here! some dialogue, cases, and themes taken directly from criminal minds (S03 EP20, S04 EP01, & S05 EP08). originally, i had it planned to be 3 parts, but after editing, and looking at the word count, it makes more sense to be 5 parts. i don’t want to inundate you lovely people with massive word counts (even though 10k is massive) so this is the finalized count. because i finally got my shit together and finished this out, part 3 will be up wednesday morning, part 4 will be up friday morning, and the final part 5 will be up sunday morning. thank you to everyone who showed some love for part one, and thank you to anyone else who stumbled across my crazy writing and read along!

at the end, I’ve tagged the peeps that interacted with part 1. if you don’t want to be tagged for the other parts, just let me know :)

ok enough of my rambling inner monologue, here we go friends!

link to part 1: here

****

May 2008

We were in New York, investigating what started out as five connected shootings in the city. After twelve hours, we were up to nine fatalities.

We delivered the profile at nine thirty, finally satisfied with the outcome after a day's worth of combing over crime scene photos and witness statements. Hotch didn’t want to waste another second, making sure the profile went out before the night shift went out to patrol.

“Now, our first theory is that we’re dealing with a team.” Derek started. “In the case of the D.C. snipers, there was actually one intended victim.”

“John Muhammad wanted to kill his ex wife, but he knew if he did, he’d be the prime suspect, so he created a spree in order to mask his primary motivation.”

Spencer added before turning to SSA Joyner. “Muhammad and Malvo also left a death card at one of their scenes, just like this unsub.”

“We believe our unsubs have studied that case. They’re opening a line of communication.”

There was an outpouring of judgement focused on us, since we were in charge of the D.C. snipers case as well. These unsubs know we’re here, and they’re trying to show they can outthink us.

“Yes, they are playing games. But what that tells us is at least one of them has some intelligence.” You tried to hold your ground, and not let their opinions get to you.

“And like I said,” Prentiss interrupted, ready to put these cops in their place. “They know these cases. He’s also studied the placement of the surveillance systems well enough to avoid detection.”

“We’ve asked officers to canvass their precincts, and look out for a father-son type of duo that fit the dominant-submissive profile.” Rossi had Reid hand out some gang related profiles, just in case the profile shifted. But we were pretty confident in our first go.

“Talk to the people on your beats, look out for anything suspicious. And let's pray that this isn’t random.” The detective in charge finished and let his precinct disperse.

“Hey y/n/n, we’re gonna head back in five if you want a spot in the fun suburban.” JJ teased and lightly shoved Spencer’s shoulder.

You smiled and started packing up your backpack. “Okay. Just, leave the fragile doctor alone.”

After packing up any files you wanted to review when you got back to the hotel room, you let Morgan and Rossi know the four of you were headed out. They weren’t much further behind with Prentiss and Garcia.

You met Reid and JJ in the lobby, droopy eyes and mouths full of yawns adorning the three of you. It was a long day, and it was only going to be worse tomorrow.

“Where’s Hotch?” You asked, ready to get your feet out of these narrow leather dress shoes. You were wearing your combat boots tomorrow.

“He’s checking in with the lady friend.” JJ nodded her head toward Hotch, who was conversing with Joyner in her office. They were standing close, and you thought you caught a smile on his face. “Do you think they’re into each other?”

“She looks like she could be Haley’s twin,” Spencer added and you sighed.

The moment the team arrived at HQ this morning, everybody noticed the resemblance to Hotch’s ex-wife. SSA Kate Joyner went pretty far back with our unit chief. They went through the academy together and had some assignments overlap over the years. If it were up to Morgan and Garcia, the two of them would be out on a date right now. But you and Rossi quickly quieted the rumors, not wanting to deal with the rage that was Aaron Hotchner if he knew we were discussing his love life.

It had barely been six months since Haley left with Jack, and Hotch had just taken off his wedding band a few weeks ago. He didn’t tell any of you until you all witnessed him getting served in the office. It slapped you across the face, especially since you’d just met Haley and Jack for a quick lunch a month and a half before. I guess she wanted Hotch to tell you when he was ready.

As much as you valued your three year friendship with Aaron Hotchner, you knew Haley deserved better. Hotch adored his wife and son, and would fight heaven and earth to keep them safe. Unfortunately, he was too busy fighting the demons from hell to be a present father and husband. Everyone had their breaking point, and Haley had hit hers. From what Hotch has told you, they’re still amicable, and are trying to be friends again. After all, it wasn’t a lack of love that ended their marriage. It was a lack of prioritizing his family.

“Knock it off. He’s on his way over.” The three of you turned to one another, pretending to hold an intriguing conversation about one of Spencer’s magic tricks. Truthfully, you were always intrigued in his magic tricks; you never understood how he could pull endless quarters out of your ear. But that conversation would have to wait for another day.

“Ready to go?” Hotch pulled the keys out of his pant pocket, and the three of you nodded as Spencer called shotgun. A smile crossed your lips, never getting over the jovial things Spencer loved to claim when his intellect wasn’t needed to solve a case.

The fifteen minute ride to the hotel downtown was silent. You were all exhausted, emotionally and physically, sick of having to watch people die over and over again.

The four of you made it into the lobby, tomorrow morning’s papers already spread across the table. “The late edition didn’t miss a beat.” You said and picked up one of the papers, the headline reading ‘Execution Style’ with a still from one of the murders. You showed it to Hotch and he shook his head.

“I’m glad I never stooped to this level when I was publishing.” You murmured, reading the first paragraph of the article.

“JJ,” Spencer started and pointed across the lobby, causing all of us to turn. It was Detective Will LaMontagne Jr., JJ’s adorably chivalrous Louisiana boyfriend.

“Will.” You could practically hear the smile on her face as she led the walk over to him.

He was supposed to fly into D.C. to visit JJ for the weekend, but came to surprise her in New York when he heard the news. Spencer and I shared a look as Hotch extended a hand to him.

“Detective.”

“I’m sorry for showing up like this, I know you’re working. But, um. I can’t stand you being on this case. And me not being here, not with what’s going on.”

JJ shook her head in the slightest, and you started to get nervous.

“Is there a problem?” Hotch asked, concern completely taking over his voice at the thought of any harm happening to his team. The couple shared a knowing look, and your patience was starting to run thin with the information being withheld. JJ meant the world to you, and you wanted to make sure she was okay.

Reluctantly, she turned to face you all, a shy smile covering her face. “I’m pregnant.”

Spencer looked over at you, not knowing how to react to the news. But you couldn’t help the smile widening on your face.

“Oh my god, JJ! Congratulations!” You wrapped your arms around her and she laughed, most likely out of relief. This was a secret she kept for a long time.

“I’ve asked JJ to marry me,”

“Will.” She cut him off as Hotch gave him a congratulatory handshake.

“We’re working out some kinks.” He added as Spencer was next to hug your blonde friend. A baby, in the BAU. You might have been more excited than JJ.

“We’ll, uh, give you both some privacy.” Hotch started towards the elevator, and JJ was quick to follow.

“Hotch,” She didn’t continue, you knew this wasn’t the exact situation she wanted to tell everyone she was having a baby.

“JJ, you could have told me.”

The tenderness in his voice could have broken your heart in two right then and there, but add on the fact that you swore you could see Hotch’s eyes tear in the slightest, you were done. You didn’t want to mention it in front of Reid, but you knew this had to do with Haley. You’d be an idiot not to notice.

The three of you filed into the elevator, leaving JJ and Will to talk in private. You all got off on the fourth floor, Reid’s room the first to come up in the hallway.

“Night Spencer.”

“Goodnight. Seven a.m.,” He reminded you as he opened the door with his keycard.

You and Hotch walked down another ten feet before he found his room.

“Goodnight,” He mumbled out and reached for his key.

“Hotch,” He closed his eyes, nodding his head in the slightest.

“I’m tired, y/n.” You could’ve pushed harder. You could have gotten him to crack if you started nagging enough. You��d earned the title as baby sister from the team since you could whine and nag them into doing anything. But tonight didn’t seem like a good time for your skills.

You nodded, understanding this conversation wasn’t going to happen.

“Goodnight. Get some sleep.”

Despite your best efforts, you didn’t sleep a wink. Hotch had gone over his files and called for Kate to meet him in the lobby. But then there was an explosion, and you had to watch from your window as Hotch sat by Joyner, waiting for her to die.

Once the team had caught the second unsub and wrapped everything up at the precinct, you headed to the hospital to check on Hotch. And unsurprisingly, he was refusing any further treatment for the ringing in his ears he tried to deny. You saw him kick Rossi out of the room, the third member that couldn’t get through to him.

“Bobo, why don’t you give it a try. Can’t yell at the baby with a broken arm.” You were the one to tackle the unsub, and landed pretty hard on the pavement downtown. Nothing a black cast covered in smiley faces from Spencer and Garcia couldn’t fix.

“I know you can’t tell, but I’m flipping you off right now.” You responded to Morgan as you raised your casted hand toward him.

You headed to Hotch’s room, knocking on the window before you walked in.

“I swear to god if you try to put me in another MRI,” He started to raise his voice when you interrupted him.

“Shit, I should go tell Morgan he was wrong. Boss is willing to yell at the baby with a broken arm.”

He turned around to face you, the lines on his forehead disappearing once he saw it was you and not Rossi.

“What happened to your arm?” You smiled and glanced down at the cast. “Just another day on the job. Tackled the unsub, the pavement was not very kind to me.”

He sat on the edge of the bed, trying to put his tie back around his neck. You scoffed, stepping over to him.

“Why the hell would you want to put that back on?”

“Because it’s part of my suit.”

You knew better than to pull it out of his hands. He was holding on to any semblance of control, and his outfit was all that he had left. Instead you took a seat in the stiff chair across from him, watching as he grimaced every time he lifted his arms too high.

“If your goal is to get me to stay another minute here under observation, you’re not gonna win.”

You shook your head. “That’s not my goal.”

He sighed, giving up on putting his tie on. He moved to finish his top button, he was at least going to be covered.

“You should be excited for JJ.” You started, testing the water on this subject.

“Did I suggest otherwise?” He asked and you shook your head.

“When was the last time you saw Jack?” His eyes widened the slightest, and you regretted asking the question. You gripped the arms of the chair, ready to be ripped a new one.

Instead, Hotch let out a sigh, and you snapped your head up. “Two weeks. Haley went to visit her mother for a week, and then we went from Florida to New York in three days.”

He was already away from Jack half the week when they were still living under the same roof. Now he was lucky if he got to say goodnight on a weekend.

“Why don’t you take some time off? I’m sure you have weeks saved up. I’ve been here three years and have never seen a tan on you.”

He shook his head. “Strauss would never approve of it.”

“Hotch,”

“Y/n, I really want to get out of this hospital room and call my son.” You shook your head, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Fine. But you’re not flying home. You have a choice between Morgan and Rossi to drive you home. My recommendation would be Morgan, you don’t want to sit through four hours of Opera music.”

You stood up, refusing to meet his eye. You were sick of dealing with stubborn men.

“I’ll see if they can fax your records to D.C. before we leave.”

He muttered out a thank you as you left the room, shaking your head at the rest of the team.

“Nothing?” Morgan asked as you returned to them.

“Nothing. Even the baby gets yelled at.” Spencer spared you a glance and you gave him a small smile. You would be fine. “And Derek, you’re driving him back.”

***

January 2010

You didn’t think it could get worse than seeing Hotch with nine stab wounds at the hands of Foyet. You desperately wanted to believe that it couldn’t be worse than that. But you were naive to think that he would let Aaron survive and not make him suffer.

None of you would be able to erase the image of Haley’s bloody body lying in the home where she and Aaron created their family. You wouldn’t forget the sight of Hotch beating into Foyet’s face, or the sobs that raked through his body once Derek had shaken him off. This was a tragedy that shaped the entire team.

After Haley’s death, the seven of you took turns checking in on Hotch, Jack, and Haley’s sister Jessica. She stayed close by when Hotch was on leave, helping him with Jack’s routine, and how to explain to the four year old where his mommy went. She moved back into her apartment a few blocks away before Aaron returned to work. He wanted to prove to her that he could do this on his own, that he could be the strong father that Jack deserved, and that Haley would be proud of.

While the three of them were together, the team would try and make it over every Saturday for dinner. Hotch needed to be around friends, and Jessica needed a guilt free night to spend with the people that made her feel good. He was reluctant at first, not wanting us over the apartment, complaining that it was a mess, and it was too small to fit everyone. But it was impeccably neat, the result of a widow not being able to sleep. Once he became comfortable with us coming around on Saturday’s, we’d pick two weeknights to stop by with a dinner, movie, or game to help take their minds off of the pain. Although you and JJ stopped by every friday regardless of whose week it was, Hotch really appreciated the extra company, and so did Jack.

Despite his attempts at being independent, there were one too many distressed calls being made to you or JJ if he couldn’t get a hold of Jess, or if he didn’t want to burden her with the responsibility.

Your feelings about Jack Hotchner hadn’t changed in the four years since you met him. You would still do anything to see the adorable little boy smile. So, it was easy to say that you didn’t mind the late night phone calls worrying about Jack’s stuffy nose or when he should take the chicken out of the freezer without it going bad. Because the more he reached out to any one of you, the closer he was to finding a new normal.

However, all of you were surprised to see SSA Aaron Hotchner in his office only a month and a half after the event. Sure, he made remarkable progress, but you all assumed he would take a little more time, maybe take Jack on a well deserved vacation. Instead, you walked into the office on a monday morning, Hotch the first one in attendance.

That was two weeks ago.

The readjustment period had worn off, and Hotch was back to being a drill sergeant. Even more aggressive than he was before.

The case we were working was local, saving us the discomfort of sleeping in a hotel bed. We were in Virginia, investigating two murdered families, similar to ‘The Fox’.

“Who?” You asked, not familiar with the creepy nickname.

“Four years ago Karl Arnold, aka the fox, killed eight families.” Derek informed you. It must have been just before you started at the BAU.

“Similar to this case he took the father’s wedding rings, except in his case he took them as trophies.” Spencer finished.

“Hotch, you gave evidence at Arnold’s trial. I think you should go see him.” Derek was acting unit chief since before Haley’s death, and continued his position even with Hotch’s return. Strauss was weary now more than ever to give Aaron the title back so quick.

“I’d like to take l/n with me.” You looked over to Hotch, his eyes resting on yours, waiting for your approval.

You gave a small nod, placing your sunglasses over your eyes. “Okay. Let’s go.”

Hotch got the keys to a suburban and before you could meet him at the car, Prentiss pulled you back.

“Hey, are you sure you’re okay with this?” She was always looking out for you, heck she was the one that made you pack extra barf bags for crime scenes. She knew meeting face to face with a family killer would do a number on you. But Hotch can’t face this guy on his own. Not after what happened.

“I’m good. Not the first time I've interrogated a psychopath.” She reluctantly nodded.

“Okay. Just, let Hotch take the lead.”

You gave her arm a squeeze. “I will. Let’s find this guy.”

The ride to Red Onion Supermax was a short and quiet one. Hotch filled you in on the particulars of Arnold’s case, making sure you knew it inside and out. This was a team effort after all.

You couldn’t get a clean read on Hotch, however, on the ride over. He’d yet to crack a true smile or laugh in the weeks he’d been back, which normally wouldn’t be so out of character for him. But Reid had been trying to get him to crack with every magic trick he knew, even agreeing to let Derek joke about his lack of childhood and understanding of pop culture. But nothing worked.

It worried you to see the regression he’s made since coming back. You knew how happy he was at home with Jack, that a smile crossed his face most of the day when he was playing legos with his son. You hoped he was here because he wanted to be, not because he felt like he had an obligation to the team or the Bureau.

“Karl has a big ego. He’s going to answer every question with a question. He’ll try to gain the advantage with me by asking why I’m not wearing my wedding ring.” You looked down at his left hand, the gold band that you noticed on your first day, now gone, along with the woman he loved. “And then he will turn his attention to you.”

“So that’s why you brought me along.”

“Your presence will throw him off guard. And he’s going to want to describe to you in graphic detail every sexual act he committed with the families.”

“To freak me out?” Because you haven’t even met this sick bastard and you were certainly already freaked out.

Hotch met your eye, and you knew this was only going to get worse. “To pull you into his fantasy.”

The guard radioed for the gate to open, and you tried to contain the tremors in your hands. This was a wing of psychotic sexual sadists, they would pick up on your nervous ticks.

You looked to Hotch once the gate opened, and he nodded for you to go in.

“Go ahead.” You followed the guard in, surprised at the lack of noise you were welcomed with. “Keep your eyes forward. More than anything he’s going to want to see images of the children.”

“We can’t give him that.” You argued, as you started to hear the men from their cells.

“We have to give him something or we’ll get nothing from him.”

You’d kept your breathing under control the entire walk down the hallway, until a man crashed against the glass, causing you to flinch and spare a glance.

“Isn’t that, uh,-”

“Derek Payne.” He finished for you, his eyes still straight ahead.

“It’s reinforced glass.” You scoffed. Of course he wasn’t worried about another man ripping him apart.

“Easy for you to say, he tore apart fourteen women.”

The door opened to the interrogation room, and this time Hotch entered first. You were met with Karl Arnold, red bushy hair and a beard to match. He was average height, and a little stocky, not what you pictured him to look like.

“Hello Karl,” Hotch greeted him as we settled in on the other side of the table.

“Agent Hotchner,” He stood. “I wasn’t informed you were bringing a, uh,” He glanced at you, looking you up and down before turning back to Hotch. You really regretted wearing a white silk top with your dress pants today. “They just said two agents.”

“This is Agent-”

“Y/n, l/n.” You tried to control the dilation of your eyes as he looked right through you. “I know all about you.”

Now you understood why Emily asked you if you were sure about this. He kept his eyes on Hotch as he started the interrogation, never looking you in the eyes longer than a second. Even if you directed a question toward him, he would only answer to Hotch. He was a misogynist. You don’t know why you’re so surprised at this discovery, he tortured wives and families.

When he offered up his book of dialogue between him and his fans, he smelled your perfume as you reached across the table to grab it. Hotch quickly took it for you, letting you sit back down in your seat. Your gut was no longer in your stomach, it was lodged in your throat.

“How’d you lose your ring, Agent Hotchner?” It was beyond your level of profiling to understand how Hotch could just sit there and take the assault on his personal life from a man who ruined families, especially with what he’d just been through. You’d never mastered the art of compartmentalization quite like Hotch. But right now, you were thankful for your uncontrollable emotions.

“I can look past your refusal to answer my question, if you let me see the children. It’s the only way I can truly help you.” You gripped the files harder at the mention of the victims and looked at Hotch.

“Can I speak with you for a second?” He nodded and the two of you stood.

“Is there something wrong, y/n?” You bit back the sarcasm that was threatening to fall from your mouth.

“Nothing’s wrong, Karl.”

You exited the interrogation room, still clutching the files close to your chest.

“We cannot show him these.”

He looked at Arnold, who seemed to find your eyes, even through the reflective mirror. “These images will be his undoing and will lead us to the killer.”

“These are not just images.”

“That’s exactly what they are.”

“Hotch, I am not about to parade a dead twelve year old girl in a bathing suit in front of a serial killer who gets off on it.” You raised your voice, not willing to compromise any respect you had left for these victims.

“Then show him the others. It’ll gain his trust and get him talking. He won’t talk to me, he knows I know everything that gets him off. But he’ll want to tell you just what he would do to them. I told you, he wants to pull you in.”

You shook your head. “These are children! Helpless children whose fathers have to live with what this animal did to their families! These strangers do not get to see the torture and humiliation that they went through.”

“If you can’t stomach showing him what he desires, then I’ll do it. Because we’re not leaving until we get a name out of him. You’re either with the team or you’re not.”

You scoffed. “You’re not the unit chief anymore. I do what Morgan says if we can’t come to an agreement.”

It was bold of you to remind him of his subordinate place. But you were equals now, despite the decade between you two. You didn’t have to listen to his orders if you felt they were wrong.

He reached for the files, but you turned away from him. “I’m going in there. Not you. But I’m going to run the interrogation my way, not exposing these children. If you have a problem with that, you can call Morgan.”

You motioned for the guard to let you back in. You took your seat across from Karl, a smirk still evident on his face.

“What, no Agent Hotchner?”

“You know, yours was one of the first cases I studied,” You started, trying to loosen up the muscles in your face. Going against every natural instinct in your body was making it hard to relax. “I’ve been fascinated ever since. I wanted to tell you sooner, but I was embarrassed with him in the room.”

“You’re embarrassed because you want to know what I did, don’t you.” You pushed out a smile, a little giggle behind it to entice him.

And of course it did. “Yes.”

“I can show you exactly what I did to them.”

“Tell me.” You tilted your head to the side, pushing some hair behind your ear. You were fighting the bile rising in your throat with every word you exchanged with him.

“Children are so precious, so clean. But they need guidance, especially the girls.”

You narrowed your eyes. “Why?”

“Girls have much more to lose than boys. It’s a fact, the female body can handle pain much better.” If this wasn’t a serial killer across from you, you’d agree with him and make some jokes about the female anatomy. But he was enjoying this, just like Hotch said. He was pulling you in.

“What did you do to them?”

He smiled. “I showed them, what men, their fathers, and brothers, are capable of.”

“And what is that?”

“Once I killed the children, It always amazed me how little the father fought the inevitable, the dying.”

“I never thought I would get these answers, let alone from the man himself.” You pushed out another smile, because you knew he was holding back. He was almost willing to trust you, he just needed to be groomed a little more.

“It takes a good woman, to make an honest man. And you’re prettier than Agent Hotchner.”

He was dancing around the information now, knowing that he had your time and attention. “Karl, do you know why you killed all those families?”

“I already told you why.”

You dropped the sweet tone, and pushed up on your elbows. “No, you told me how. And your motivations were all driven by sex, motivations you learned from your father.”

You saw him flinch, and you knew you were getting somewhere.

“You assert your dominance by making the father, the head of the household, watch you torture, assault, and take anything you wanted from the people he’s supposed to protect. Now your admirer, they don’t have the same ambitions as you do. And normally, that would bother a man like you. You want to be adored for every single part of your mess. But like you said, they’re an admirer, not a fan. So I’m guessing it’s a woman, who you’ve really come to care for.”

He tugged on his shackled wrists, you clearly got what you were looking for.

“Those women, those girls, they needed to be taught a lesson. How to obey who’s in charge. And you,” he laughed as he inched as far across the table as he could. “The things I would do to you if I weren’t nailed to this table. You’d be done before I could call your name.”

Before you could respond, Hotch came into the room, demanding a name. You stood up, no longer needing to play a role.

“It must be distracting, working with such a beautiful woman everyday.” You didn’t spare him another glance as you heard him mumble out a name to Hotch, finally getting what he wanted: power over you.

“Morgan, we’ve got a name. It’s a female guard in intake. Get everybody here ASAP.” The guard led you and Hotch back down the hallway, through the lion's den, and back to the elevator. Once inside, you let out a breath. Hotch turned to look at you, but you spoke up before he had the chance.

“Don’t ask me to do that ever again.”

You would’ve yelled at him, tore him to pieces in the elevator ride from the fourth floor to the exit, but there was a guard escorting you out. You didn’t want him to have the privilege of watching two FBI agents battle it out. And honestly, you weren’t sure if you had the heart to yell at him after all he’d been through.

But once you were escorted through the exterior gates, your team in sight, you regained the nerve to give Hotch a piece of your mind.

Not before he spoke first though.

“You did exactly what needed to be done. I didn’t ask you to act that way toward him, and I’m sorry you feel that that was your only way in. But I’m not going to apologize for getting the name of the killer.”

“So you would have acted in the same degrading way if the roles were reversed?”

He scoffed. “Yes, I would have. Because unlike you, my feelings don’t impair my judgement or ability to do this job. You’re an asset to this team, you need to find a way to get your emotions in check.”

You stopped walking, turning around to face him. You were in the middle of the driveway now, SWAT and BAU canvassing the scene. But you were going to do this here and now.

“The only reason you brought me here was to appeal to that sick son of a bitch. The only thing that makes me an asset to you is the fact that I have a vagina and you don’t. You turned me from a Supervisory Special Agent into a fighting fuck toy! You watched as I drained every ounce of respect I had for myself to turn into what that psychopath desired, all because I wouldn’t show him pictures of innocent children.” He looked over your shoulder to the team, embarrassed that they were hearing this. “At least have the respect to look at me while I’m talking to you!”

Hotch had never heard you yell like this. You were the calm one, the baby, as Derek called you. No one ever pushed you so far over the edge to get a reaction out of you. At least, not until he did.

“The next time you ask me, JJ, Prentiss, or Garcia to flirt our way into a serial killer's mind, to expect us to degrade ourselves in order to save another woman, I will not hesitate to report you to Strauss.” You could hear footsteps behind you, but you continued on as tears started to form in your eyes. “You used to say that my empathy was what made me an amazing agent. That my ability to connect with victims and families was the reason I’m here. So do not try and make me feel worthless for possessing something that you wish you could have. Because the way you act, with no capability for empathy, is a depressing way to live.”

“Y/n,” Spencer rested a hand on your shoulder, but you shook it off.

“Figure out the man you want to be.”

Before you could say anything else, Spencer dragged you away from Hotch and towards the cars. You could feel the tears freely falling down your cheeks, but you made no effort to remove them. You ignored the stares from the rest of your team, not giving them the satisfaction of knowing what went down in that interrogation room. Instead, you got into the passenger seat of the suburban, and Spencer started the drive back to the office.

Rationally, you knew you went off too hard at him. He never deliberately asked you to flirt with Arnold. He asked you to show him the pictures of Lucy, to get him to crack under the fantasy. But you refused. You would rather make yourself go through that pain than any young child. It’s what you’d always done.

Spencer tried to convince you they hadn’t heard the conversation. That they were all too focused on SWAT’s apprehending of the guard to pay attention.

“Spence,” You started and looked over at him. “We all had our earpieces in. You heard every word.”

And he was silent the rest of the ride back. You were exhausted, and you wanted nothing more than to go home and fall asleep on your couch with reruns playing in the background. But you had a mountain of paperwork to finish, and still needed to debrief when the team got back.

Halfway through your stack, the team came back to the bullpen. Prentiss gave your shoulder a comforting squeeze as she passed by, heading for her desk. Derek had agreed to let everyone go home without debriefing. This was the earliest we’d been done with a case so close to home. We needed to capitalize on our rest.

JJ was the first to go home, excited to be home in time for dinner with Will and Henry. Prentiss and Rossi followed shortly after, going to celebrate the win of this case at an expensive restaurant, at Dave’s expense.

“Come on you two, don’t make me drag you out of here kicking and screaming.” Derek addressed you and Reid as he pulled his coat on.

“We’re right behind you boss man.” Spencer said and turned his desk light off, grabbing his cane. He should be able to ditch all mobility aids soon.

You swung your backpack over a shoulder and turned off your own light. You didn’t even make it out of your four foot space before Hotch called out to you.

“Y/n, could I see you before you leave?” He was standing in front of his office, on higher ground than the rest of us. Power move, you thought to yourself. But he wouldn’t be that petty.

You looked back to Reid and Moran, the former nodding to you before seeing himself to the elevator. Now it was just Spencer, his eyes begging for you to leave.

“I don’t need to remind you how deeply you care for all of us. But if you keep putting yourself out there to comfort him, you’re going to get destroyed.” This was the first time Spencer had mentioned this to you. Sure, you’d been helping Hotch out at home, a little more than normal, but everybody was pitching in. His wife died for god's sake.

“Spence, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He let out a sigh and fidgeted with his cane. You found it at a consignment shop on one of your weekends off, and bought it for him without hesitation. It had an eagle engraved in it’s clutch, something regal, medieval, and screamed Spencer Reid. You ignored the price, a forty dollars more than you would’ve liked to spend on a walking stick, but the look on his face when you gave it to him was priceless.

“You need to stand up for yourself. Nothing excuses the way he treated you today. Regardless of your decision to play a character.”

God, could he read you.

“No pair of rose colored glasses could cloud that. Not even yours.” He gave you one last shadow of a smile before limping his way to the elevator.

Once you regained your composure, you turned to make your way up to Hotch’s office. He was sitting in his chair, staring at the paperwork waiting to be filled out before him. You knocked on the open door, and he stood up without even looking at you. You were going to take Spencer’s advice and stick up for yourself, so you had to set the pace.

“Can this be quick? I wanted to get home before traffic started up.” He rounded the front of his desk, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he leaned against it.

“I’m sorry for the way I treated you back at the prison.” You nodded, not wanting to verbally accept the apology that was due to you hours ago. “I was out of line and completely blinded by the case. I should’ve listened to you and taken your reservations into consideration. It was narcissistic of me to think I was the only one capable of making the right decision.”

“Thank you.” You stuttered out, still absorbing the tone of his voice. His word choice was self deprecating, a cry for help if you didn’t know any better.

“Y/n,” He started but was interrupted by a shaky breath. “I hate that I made you feel like all you’re good for is to romance your way into their heads. You deserve to be treated with respect, to be valued because of your empathy and your psychological understanding of victims and their families. If I’ve ever made you feel like you were worthless before this afternoon, please tell me.”

“No, you’ve never made me feel that way.”

He nodded before turning to grab a piece of paper from his desk.

“Good. Because I’ve written up a complaint for Strauss, describing my behavior and language directed toward you today. You shouldn’t have to wait for a next time to file it.”

He extended the paper to you, and you walked until you were standing in front of him, accepting the complaint into your hands. But you didn’t even read it before tearing it in two.

“What are you doing?”

“Hotch, I’m not filing a complaint against you. Everything that I did today was my choice. You didn’t force me into anything.”

He ran a hand through his hair, the first time you’ve seen it tousled in the office.

“I was uncomfortable showing Arnold those pictures. So I made the choice to play a character, to appeal to his fantasy. You weren’t in the room, and you didn’t suggest that. If anything, you tried more than anything to get me to stick to the script. Did you have some choice words for me that weren’t necessarily appropriate? Yes. But we all have our moments. After we got out of there, I felt sick that I had to do that to get a name out of him. It wasn’t the first time I’ve camouflaged myself for the greater good, and it won’t be the last. I took out the self hatred I had on you, because you were there. Because if I did it your way, I wouldn’t be able to look at myself in the mirror again without feeling ashamed. But you didn’t deserve it.”

“Yes, I do. I deserve to be ridiculed for telling you that your empathy is a weakness. I deserve to be ridiculed for yelling at Garcia for missing something on a search. I deserve,”

His voice broke, and you froze in place. You were about to see Aaron Hotchner cry for the first time in four years. “I deserve to be punished for Haley’s death.”

Your own eyes started to water as you saw a single tear roll down his cheek. Without thinking, you reached forward and held his hands in your own. They were shaking, and he tried to pull them away from you. But you held on tight, you weren’t going anywhere.

“Hotch, look at me.” He kept his gaze on the windows, looking out onto the concrete roof.

“Hotch, please.” You were quieter the second time, and that’s what got him to meet your eyes.

“I’m not going to sit here and tell you that you could’ve prevented Haley’s death if you did one thing instead of the other. Because no matter what you did, Foyet would’ve found her, and done this all over again.” He tried to look away from you, but you tugged on his hands, begging him to stay. “But what you did prevent, was Foyet taking away the greatest thing you and Haley ever made. You saved your son, Hotch. And you ended Foyet’s reign of terror. You get to spend every day reminding Jack how amazing his mother was. How strong, resilient, and fierce she was. How she looked death in the eye and didn’t even flinch. You get to live the rest of your life for your son.”

He nodded and closed his eyes, letting the few remaining tears fall down his face. You let your own fall with the reprieve of no longer being under his stare, not wanting to fall apart when he needed you.

“I love her. I never stopped loving her. The divorce, it wasn’t because of that. It was because of this job.”

You squeezed his hands before letting them go, letting him wipe off his face.

“I know. And I know she never stopped loving you.”

You never thought you would get to this moment when you first met Haley. You let out a small laugh while remembering your first encounter, how pregnant and angry she was at Hotch.

“What?” You smiled and shook your head.

“I’m just remembering the first time I met her. She was pregnant, she called you a robot, and was cracking jokes left and right to try and get you to crack.”

That got him to smile. “I could always make her laugh when we were younger. She had the funniest, most embarrassing laugh. But it was Haley. And it was addicting.”

You wanted him to remember her like this, with a smile on her face and the loving soul she was.

“I truly am sorry for what I said to you, but you have to know I didn’t mean it.”

You nodded. “I know you didn’t. Just apologize to Garcia in the morning, and get home to Jack. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He gave you a small smile as you picked up your backpack.

Spencer’s words stung in your ears while you were holding Hotch’s hands. You loved everyone on this team as your family. And Hotch needed you to be there for him a lot more over the last two months. Sure, you’d brushed off some harsh conversations with him considering the circumstances, but you knew when it went too far, like today.

“Y/n,” His voice pulled you from your thoughts, stopping you at the door. “Thank you.”

You nodded. “Of course.”

Maybe you did care too much for people. But if it helped them get back to normal, you’ll continue wearing those rose colored glasses a little while longer.

***

March 2010

“I’m grocery shopping. Because I have no food in my apartment and I never thought I’d say this, but I’m sick of eating pizza.” You threw a box of cheerios in your cart, careful not to hit the eggs on their way in.

“That’s how you’re spending your saturday? Our first saturday off in a month?”

“Well, unless I want to spend another twenty bucks on one meal, I’ve gotta do my grown up chores.” “You need to get your butt back home so we can go out and drink.”

Emily was relentless, to say the least. Every single weekend you had off, her number popped up on your phone the minute you got home. She hated resting in her own solitude, and tried to drag you along for any activity she could think of. Shopping, drinking, walking around the national mall, and, in desperate cases, running. But her record wasn’t stellar in getting you to attend.

“I’m spending the afternoon with my couch, a book that has taken me too long to read, and probably eat an entire bag of smartfood.” You chucked a box of granola bars in your cart too when you heard a kid cry. You turned to the end of the aisle, but the parent was blocking the child. “Besides, it’s dinner tonight at Hotch’s.”

“He canceled this morning. Rossi was supposed to call and let you know.” You rolled your eyes. Of course Dave forgot.

“Daddy! I want the poptarts!” You heard the kid yell out again. But you knew that voice, and you couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face.

“Em, I’ll see you on Monday. Have a shot for me.”

“I’ll have two.”

You laughed as you hung up the phone, pushing the cart over to your favorite little boy on the planet. You didn’t think to give the father another glance when you didn’t recognize him, but that’s because Aaron Hotchner is never without a suit at the office. He was dressed in jeans now and a quarter zip, looking like a normal dad.

When you approached the two boys, Jack was leaning against the shelf, tears streaming down his cheeks as he kicked his feet against the ground.

“It looks like SSA Hotchner could use some help profiling his son.”

Hotch was quick to stand up, meeting your eye. You only smiled while crouching down to Jack’s level.

“Hey little man, what’s the problem here?” He wiped the tears from his cheeks, and your heart broke at the redness in his eyes.

“Daddy won’t let me get any pop tarts.”

“That’s because you ate the whole box in one day without my permission.” Aaron argued back.

You hid your laugh in your shoulder, not wanting to upset Jack any more. But Hotch had already caused him to spiral into a meltdown again.

“Jack, have you ever had ants on a log?” He shook his head, tears continuing down his chubby cheeks. “Well, they were my favorite snack when I was little. It’s celery, peanut butter, and raisins all set up on a plate. And the best part is, you get to make it yourself! Now, I know how much you love peanut butter, and I bet if you ate this snack, Daddy will let you get poptarts the next time you go grocery shopping.”

“Okay.” He said and nodded his little head. “But I’m sick of grocery shopping.”

“Me too buddy.” I sat down next to him. “I do not like having to walk up and down these aisles searching for food. So, why don’t we sit here while daddy finishes his list?”

You spared a glance at Hotch and his practically full basket. You knew he would be done in ten minutes if you stayed here with Jack.

“Are you sure?” Aaron asked and you nodded.

“‘Course. I don’t need food that bad anyway.” He sighed and made his way back to his carriage.

You pulled a piece of paper and a pen out of your purse and handed it to Jack.

“Aunt Jessica told me that you know how to write your name now. Can you show me?”

He sat up straight, laying the paper down on the floor. You watched as he made a loopy uppercase J, followed with big and small letters to spell out the rest of his name.

“That’s awesome buddy. What about your last name?”

“Hotchner!” He yelled out and you laughed.

“Yeah, let me spell it out for you.” You wrote it out on the paper and it took him a few minutes to copy down.

“You’re turn now, y/n.” He handed you the pen and you wrote your name down, saying the letters as you wrote them. Jack repeated you, and it made you laugh. You forgot that kids were such sponges.

By the time you finished writing Aaron and Haley’s names for Jack, Hotch was back with his cart. “Alright buddy, it’s time for us to go. We gotta let y/n finish her grocery shopping.”

“No! I want y/n to come home with us for dinner. She was helping me spell everyone's names!”

You smiled as you stood up, giving Jack a hand. “Maybe next time buddy. But you gotta get home to try those ants on a log.”

“Actually, we’re making pizzas for dinner, Jack’s saturday choice. You can come over, if you don’t have any plans already.” You’d never heard Hotch this nervous before. It made you laugh a little.

“I’d love to. Only if I get to put extra cheese on my pizza though.”

“Of course!” Jack exclaimed and you matched his smile.

“Awesome! I’ll let you two pay for all this food and I’ll meet you at your house okay?” Jack nodded before running to the front of the cart.

“You sure you don’t have any plans? I don’t want you to give up another saturday night at my expense,”

“Hotch there is nothing more exciting than spending my weekends with the cutest four year old on the planet.” He smiled, but you knew he still wasn’t convinced. “Besides, every other twenty-nine year old I know is in a stuffy club in uncomfortable clothes. This is much more my pace.”

He nodded, a small smile on his face. “Okay. We’ll meet you at the apartment in a half an hour.”

“Sounds good. See you soon Jack!” You waved to the little boy and quickly tried to finish buying the staples that could get you through a few days at home.

You got home and quickly put your food away, making sure everything that needed to be refrigerated was chilled. You switched your t-shirt for a long sleeve tee, opting for sneakers instead of boots. Comfort was the utmost importance on days off.

It took you twenty minutes to get to Hotch’s apartment from yours, arriving at five on the dot. You were known for, and proud of your punctuality. Hotch answered the door after two knocks, and you couldn’t help but focus on the noise of three different locks unlocking.

He greeted you with a slight nod of the head, button down replacing his quarter zip.

“Do you even own comfortable clothes?” “This is comfortable.” You rolled your eyes, as he took the poptarts from your hands, raising his eyebrow at you.

“Didn’t I just have this fight with my four year old son about not buying these?” He asked as he let you in the house.

“Yes, but I’m the fun dinner guest. I bring the treats for the children.”

He tried to hide the small huff of a laugh that escaped his lips, but you still caught it. “You will be the death of me.”

You let out a laugh as he led you into the kitchen, putting them away on the top cabinet. I reached for my hip and pulled my holster off, putting it on the counter.

“Do you have somewhere I can put this? Last thing I need is to drop it while I throw up my pizza dough.” He unlocked the drawer in his desk, placing it in there before locking it back up.

You heard tiny footsteps running down the hall. “Y/n! It’s pizza time!”

You smiled as he tugged at your legs. “I know! I’m so excited!”

“Alright buddy, you’re up first. Show y/n how we properly throw our pizza dough in the air.” Hotch pushed a step stool over to the counter, waiting for Jack to step up. The grin on the little boy's face was ginormous as he powdered his hands with flour, taking the small ball of dough Hotch separated for him.

The two of you were on either side of Jack, each ready to follow his lead in the process. “Ok, on the count of three. One, two, three!”

You spun the dough in your hands before throwing it in the air, watching it separate the slightest bit. Jack’s giggles filled the apartment as he let his dough fall onto the counter. Aaron shook his head, you could tell this part of the meal was always a struggle for the little boy.

You watched as Jack spread out the miniscule amount of sauce he wanted along his crust, topping it off with a mountain of cheese. You taught him the more cheese, the better, and he clearly still believed you. You added some pepperoni to your own oval shaped pie, unsuccessful in making a perfect circle crust. But, not everyone could be the perfect Italian chef like David Rossi.

While the pizza’s were in the oven, the three of you sat down to play a few rounds of Candyland. You hadn’t played since your time at DCFS, and you forgot how there was no real objective to the game. It certainly wasn’t your game of choice, but Jack was still a little young to be able to contend with you in a game of monopoly. A few more years, you thought.

Once the pizza’s were done, Jack helped you set the table as Hotch cut the pies. You felt a little out of place, crossing some very important boundaries by having dinner with just the two Hotchner boys. This saturday was much different than the ones you spent when the whole team was over, Henry and Jack putting on dance parties for the guests.

You started to become more aware of your actions around the apartment; how you knew where the placemats were kept, that Jack used his purple cup for milk at dinner, and the strict no electronics rule at the table. However, that had been established by Haley years ago. The thought of her had a shot of guilt running through your stomach, sitting down with her family for dinner, just three and a half months after she’d passed.

You’d been thinking a lot about what Spencer had said that night at the BAU. He was vague, too vague for the doctor that could tell you how long he’d been alive down to the second. After a few sleepless nights, you called the doctor in question and demanded he explain himself. But after his admission, you quickly regretted having all the information.

Spencer Reid has known you for almost five years now, and has seen you through the moments that have shaped your adult life. Killing Stephanie Moore, testifying in the fisher king case, being your excusing phone call from multiple dates, and holding your hand as you took in one of your former foster siblings from a bad relationship. There was absolutely nothing in your life that could be hidden from him.

So when he told you he noticed your feelings for Hotch ‘about two years ago’, you nearly stopped dead in your pacing tracks. Not because you didn’t know your own feelings for the man, but because you didn’t realize it had been that long. That he had been married to Haley, albeit only for a month longer, that you started to notice how handsome your boss was. Upon hearing the truth out loud, and from another person, you ran to the bathroom and threw up a few times.

You were so embarrassed, so ashamed of caring for someone that couldn’t be yours. For caring for someone who’s wife you truly adored. After the third round of puking, Spencer reassured you through the phone that it wasn’t your fault. We can’t control who we love. And yes, he said love.

“Are you okay y/n?” Jack’s little voice pulled you from your thoughts. You smiled at his sauce covered face and nodded.

“Yeah, I’m fine. How’s your pizza, Jack?”

“Awesome! Daddy is the best pizza cooker ever!”

“You sure you’re okay? You look a little pale,” Aaron commented and referenced your plate. You hadn’t taken a bite.

“I’m good, really. Just thinking about how I’m going to make a bigger lego tower than Jack after dinner.”

That got the little boy to laugh, successfully switching the conversation to Jack’s favorite toys. But you noticed the glaces Hotch snuck your way, not believing you for a second. You were an awful liar.

The longer the three of you sat at the table, the larger your smile grew around these boys. Seeing Hotch being able to relax and really enjoy his time with Jack always brought a smile to your face. He was a natural father, sliding into the role of playmate and swaddler, cuddler and soother. You even remember him helping JJ out with Henry’s swaddle at work one day.

But you knew he felt guilty, not being able to be present in his son’s life everyday. You saw it in the hundred’s of views of the video of Jack’s first steps, the late night phone calls while away on a case just to say goodnight to his little boy. He missed out on a lot of the baby years, and he would be making it up to Jack for the rest of his life, with nights like these. With the whole weekend devoted to Jack Hotchner’s favorite things, minus the sugary pop tarts. Hotch had mastered the duality of being a Supervisory Special Agent for the FBI, and the loving father to Jack Hotchner. It was one of the reasons why you started caring so much for him.

“Alright Jack, you can build one tower with y/n, then it’s bath time and off to bed.” You saw the pout on Jack’s face as Hotch cleared our plates, and you helped him off the chair.

“Come on, maybe if we’re quick enough we can make two.”

He giggled as he led you to his room, stuffed animals and toys galore. This boy won’t want for a thing.

“Okay, you make a big blue one, I’ll do purple.”

You finished much quicker than the four year old, but under no circumstances would he let you sit and watch him make his masterpiece. Instead, since you had nearly two and a half feet on him, you stacked your tower on top of his and continued adding pieces to make it bigger. He cheered you on as it started to reach your head, and you were getting excited yourself. Until, it came to a crashing fall with the last green piece on top.

“Noo!” Jack yelled out, trying to catch the falling pieces.

“It’s okay Buddy, you can always make another one.” Aaron’s voice trying to soothe his son caught both you and the little guy’s attention.

The two of you turned to see Hotch leaning in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. You wondered how long he’d been standing there.

“And maybe next time, we can make one as big as daddy.”

Hotch let out a laugh as Jack smiled at you in amazement. He liked how your brain worked.

“Bath time, bud. We gotta get your face cleaned up from all that pizza sauce, and ship you off to bed.”

“But y/n’s here,” He whined, not wanting the lego fun to end.

“Well I have to get home and take a shower too, bud. Don’t worry, there’s plenty more playdates in your future.” You said and stood up, giving the little boy a high five.

“Go wait for me in the bathroom okay, I’m gonna walk y/n out.”

“Okay. Bye bobo.” He said and ran off to the bathroom, leaving you speechless in his bedroom.

“You let him be around Derek Morgan way too much.”

“Probably. But you can’t compete with the guy who brings over a new lego set every weekend.” Hotch got your gun for you, walking you back to the front door.

“Are you kidding? You’re his hero, Hotch. He asked me last week if I was a superhero like daddy.” He cracked a smile, but his eyes were glued to the floor, unable to meet your own.

“Why did you cancel dinner tonight?” He sighed and lifted his head. You’d been wanting to ask him since you were at the grocery store. The team had been coming over for three months now, and it was something we all started to look forward to.

“I was sick of feeling like a burden to you all. I mean, asking you all to give up your Saturday nights, sometimes our only free night of the week to spend in my depressing apartment, it had been enough.” If only you could show this man how much the team cared for him through your eyes, he would never doubt his worth another day in his life.

“Hotch, the highlight of my week is coming here to be with you all. My family. Watching Henry and Jack play with each other, listening to Spencer and Penelope fight over who the true godparent is, and getting to be on the receiving end of Rossi’s awesome cooking?”

He nodded, mumbling an ‘I know’ a few times under his breath. But he needed to know that as much as you all come here for Jack, you guys care for Aaron and his well being just as much.

“I come here every saturday to make sure that Aaron Hotchner has not dressed in a suit for the sixth day in a row, and to make sure he knows that he’s doing such an amazing job with Jack. That he is being the best father, friend, and boss, that he can be.”

This time, his eyes were locked on yours as you got a real Aaron Hotchner smile out of him, dimples and all. You couldn’t help but make a check mark in the air, the team tally still going strong. He playfully rolled his eyes as you swung your bag across your shoulder.

“So who’s in the lead now?”

“Me, for the last six months. I can’t be dethroned.” You felt your cheeks grow warm, hoping he wouldn’t think too much into your stat keeping.

“Well, that seems like a pretty accurate tally.”

You made sure it was. And selfishly, you hoped no one else could get that beautiful smile to cross his face like you could.

“Thank you for coming over. We both had a lot of fun.”

“I did too. I’m around anytime, my tower building skills are not occupied for many other people.” He let out a laugh as he opened the door for you.

“Goodnight y/n. Let me know when you get home.”

“I will. Night, Hotch.”

You got home in twenty minutes, texting Aaron as you walked through your door. Quickly changing into pajamas and throwing Legally Blonde into the DVD player, your phone dinged at a new message.

It was from Hotch, a picture attached to the message. It was of Jack, towel wrapped around his head, eyes shut from grinning so wide. ‘He wanted me to send this to you. He said, ‘this is how happy I am that y/n was here tonight.’ Thanks again for everything. Goodnight.”

You couldn’t help the tears that pooled in your eyes at the sweet little boy in the picture, and his amazing dad behind the camera.

****

tags: @simplyprentiss @michaelahah @ssahotchner99 @svrgicalhands @hotchtopic @unionjackpillow @philcoolson @tommhollandzxhaz @kathleenjasmine @canimarrypizzaornah @reaperwalking @inlovewithaaronhotchner @shelbymm11 @mrshotchner23 @tropicalwrites

#aaron hotchner x female! reader #aaron hotchner x female!reader #aaron hotchner fic #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds #aaron hotchner

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imaginesforjohnnydepp · 3 years

Text

Violette Pt. 4

@kittenlittle24 @evelynrosestuff

Johnny was glad that he took up Violette on her offer because he had to get out of Los Angeles; Violette was a gracious host and they fell back in sync with each other. While she was at work, he took the opportunity to explore the area to find souvenirs for his kids and check up on them, other times he’d go through Violette’s books and movies and photo albums, which were his favorite things to do. The albums were completely filled up with pictures. There were pictures of her at weddings, work related parties, vacation pictures (lots of them), newspaper clippings of her accomplishments. It made him happy knowing that Violette became so successful and is well respected, because she deserves it.

When he heard the keys at the door, he quickly closed the book and turned up the volume on an episode of Chopped just as Violette walked in, shaking water off her umbrella and putting it in the stand. “Sorry I’m late! I was held up with paperwork then there was a wreck, but on the plus side I got Italian!” It was nearly eight thirty when they sat down to eat, the both of them digging into their shrimp pasta as they filled each other in on their day. Since it was Friday and Violet didn’t have to be at work the next day, they watched TV together after dinner, the living room dark except for a lamp on a low setting. It was halfway through a second episode of Fraser, the one where Fraser accidentally tells Daphne about Niles’ feelings for her before the wedding when Johnny noticed Violette had fallen asleep.

Her head was tipped back and her chest was gently rising and falling; she looked so comfortable and peaceful he felt bad for waking her. Johnny shook her gently. “Hey Vi? It’s time to wake up, you’re gonna hurt your neck like that.” Slowly, Violette came to, lifting her head from the back of the couch, her eyes slowly opening. “Huh? What time is it?”

Her voice was heavy with sleep and she stretched, arms above her head. “Bout time for you to go to bed. You fell asleep halfway through Fraser.” Violette knew he was right; she had a long day at work and now all she wanted was to apply a serum or two and get into bed. “You’re right, it’s been a long day. Do you want the bathroom first?” He shook his head no, and she smiled before heading to her room.

“Good night Johnny.” They both headed their separate ways, and as he changed into his pajamas, Johnny could hear Violette doing her night time routine, the faucet running every few minutes as she rinsed her face. He checked his phone for messages, emails from his lawyer and Amber’s, two missed phone calls from his family about funeral arrangements, all things that can wait until tomorrow; he hooked it up to the charger and placed it face down. After a few more minutes, the faucet turned up for the last time, and Violette knocked twice before opening the door. “Bathroom’s all yours now.”

He tried not to notice how long her legs looked in her pajama pants or how ample her chest looked, even in an oversized shirt. Frankly, ever since he got here, Johnny’s been trying to ignore how gorgeous Violette is; she looked good in just about everything she wore: her work clothes where the slacks she wore clung to her legs like a second skin, the leggings and tank tops he saw her in, drenched in sweat when she came back after a morning run. It was like acting in front of a green screen and trying to ignore how ridiculous Bill Nighy looks with black dots on his face as he wears a gray leotard. Johnny couldn’t ignore the fact that Violette has an ass and breasts, and he felt guilty checking her out when her back was turned, but what could he do? He certainly wasn’t going to tell a grown woman to cover up in her own home; with a sigh, he shuffled into the bathroom to do his business.

Meanwhile, Violette was in bed, simultaneously reading and going through her text messages; due to the torrential rain that would be coming this weekend, book club was cancelled (which she was grateful for because she’s kind of behind the rest of the group). Violette was just about to call it a night when a new message appeared, from Angela. I know you took my floral dress the other day. Mikayla said she saw you leave with it. Yes, she did take the dress but that’s only because Angela took her favorite Dooney and Bourke handbag (something that happened months ago and Violette has yet to see it back in her closet) but unlike her sister, she plans on actually returning it. And what about it? she typed back. You can pick it up from the dry cleaner on Basin Street tomorrow, and you’re one to talk considering I haven’t seen my Dooney and Bourke purse since New Years.

Once the message was sent, she went back to her book, which had five chapters left; Violette reached for the notebook and pen and started scribbling notes about the chapter when her phone buzzed again. Thank you. And as for your purse, I think Miki has it. It’s hanging on the doorknob of her closet. Probably thought it was mine. But how’s it going with Johnny? Her fingers hovered over the keyboard, and she didn’t know what to say. How is it going with Johnny? Violette wanted to tell her sister that things are great, like nothing’s changed between them, about her growing feelings for her ex husband, but all she texted back was that things are fine.

Really, only fine? Leave it to Angela to be overly observant, might as well come clean now. It feels like nothing’s changed between us even though a LOT has. We’re cracking jokes, eating together, going out. It feels like old times. Violette knew what Angela was going to say next: that they need to slow down, how Johnny probably isn’t ready for another relationship when he already has so much going on. She hastily texted: And I know what you’re going to say next, but I can’t help it. He’s still Johnny. I gotta go, it’s late.

She put her phone on the charger and placed it face down on the nightstand. Violette hoped that all her feelings toward Johnny could just be chalked up to not getting enough sex or boredom or loneliness, because really, what would a relationship with Johnny look like today? Probably a long distance relationship and media interference, and she’d had enough of that from last time to last a lifetime. Besides, Violette never dates men with children, and in her age group, it’s like looking for a needle in a haystack to find a single male in their late forties/early fifties who doesn't have children. Shaking her head at the thought, she pulled the covers up over her head and waited for the air conditioner to kick on to lull her to sleep.

So this was how the rest of their week went, both of them pining over the other without the other’s knowledge: Johnny pretended not to notice her figure and his growing attraction and Violette pretended that she didn’t harbor romantic feelings for him, until one day Johnny couldn’t take it any longer. He brought up the question while they sat in Violette’s car at a snowball stand, the a/c blasting and the radio on a low volume. “Why are we doing this, Vi?” The question was so out of left field that she almost choked on a bubblegum flavored hunk of ice. “What do you mean?” she asked, sucking the bubblegum syrup from the ice.

“I mean, why are we ignoring… whatever this is? We’re adults, Violette, we should be able to communicate with each other.” She was sure she was doing a good job at masking her feelings, but apparently she was wrong. “Because Johnny, it wouldn’t matter. Your life is in LA, with your children and work and my life is here. What could we actually do about it? You’re only here for another week.” Violette was actually glad that he brought it up now, because there was no way they would be able to do anything about it, since Johnny would be here for another week before going home. Leaving Violette alone with her unresolved feelings.

“And you already have so much going on. Are you sure this is what you want? If you’re ready for this?” Violette put another spoonful of her snowball in her mouth, sucking off the syrup until the ice was hard packed on her tongue. “Is that what you’re scared of? That I might leave again?” Johnny asked. “Not might, but will. As you can see, I don’t have a normal work schedule and I’m not a fan of long distance relationships.” And because I’m scared you could hurt me again,” she added in her head.

“Johnny, we’re not in the ‘80s anymore. We’re so different now, we always have been.” Johnny sighed before putting his cup in a cup holder. “We’re not that different, you’re still you and I’m still me. We’re older now, have more life experience. Violette, we were so young when we got married. And I moved on from her long before I thought about filing for divorce.” She took his words into consideration, really thinking about it. Was the reason why she never remarried is because that deep in her subconscious, Violette knew she and Johnny would make their way back to each other?

“Just one chance is all I’m asking. Please.” He looked so sincere, and the offer was so tempting. How many times had Violette had this dream of Johnny coming back to her and begging her to take him back? Too many times in the early days of their breakup, and Johnny was right, they’re older now, old enough to know what they want in their partners. “What do you say? Can you give me another chance? We can take it slow, whatever you want.”

Violette put the last spoonful of her snowball in her mouth, savoring the last bite as she thought it over. While she was a little apprehensive about the whole thing, she’d be lying to herself if she said she wasn’t at least a little curious as to how a relationship with Johnny would be like today. A lot of traveling back and forth, probably meeting his kids at some point. And what about long term? Would they live together?

Get married (or in their case remarried)? “We’ll take it slow?” Violette asked, just to make sure. “As slow as you want,” he answered. Violette smiled and grabbed Johnny’s hand. “Okay.”

#johnny depp imagines #johnny depp imagine

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ghostxofxartemis · 3 years

Link

It’s a few days late, but here’s day 6: Pet Day for MerWeek2021 hosted by @cactuarkitty.

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Mass Effect Trilogy Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Kaidan Alenko/Male Shepard Characters: Male Shepard (Mass Effect), Kaidan Alenko, Kaidan Alenko’s Mother, Dog Additional Tags: Fluff, Pet Day, MERweek2021 Series: Part 6 of MERweek 2021 Summary:

Describe or draw a special moment with your beloved pet/s. Could be special time spent together or shared time with friends/family. Let’s have fun with our furry (or not so furry) friends :)

Shoutout to @mallaidhsomo for betaing! Thanks hon!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kaidan straddles Axel, and slowly starts kneading the knots from the younger man’s back.

“Hmmm, morning to you too.” Axel mumbles, sleep still invading his mind.

“How’d you sleep?” Kaidan asks him as he deep massages Axel’s shoulders.

“Rock solid. You know, I could get used to this.”

“Well, don’t get too used to it ‘cause I’m shipping out this morning for a month.” Kaidan’s hands trail down Axel’s back until they reach his rear and he kneads both cheeks. He smirks when the younger man closes his eyes, a content smile creeps up his face and Axel moves his hips from under him.

“I know you’re leaving, and I really don’t want you to…but… hmm…this feels good.”

Kaidan leans forward and brings his lips down just a breath’s hair away from Axel’s ear. “I’m just getting started.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Axel fills up his coffee mug and leans on the counter to take a sip as he waits for his breakfast currently in the microwave. Kaidan comes down the stairs, skipping a step each time, duffle bag slung over his shoulder. He’s going to be gone for next month and it’s something Axel dreads, being home alone, while still on the mend, and while not being able to do very much makes the time go by painfully slow. He grabs the coffee thermos on the counter, all ready to go, for his husband.

“I’m running late.” Kaidan plants a kiss on his husband’s cheek before accepting the offered thermos.

“I wonder why?” Axel gives him a coy smile. He gets a scowl in return. Kaidan starts to pull away but Axel manages to grab a handful of material from his uniform. “Hey. You’re not leaving without giving a proper kiss, are you?”

Kaidan leans in and Axel’s lips curve upwards at one side of his mouth. He makes a content sound when Kaidan’s luscious lips meet his. Kaidan presses his tongue against the other man’s lips and Axel let’s it slide between his. They part after a brief moment, breathless, foreheads pressed together. Kaidan tilts his head backwards slightly so his lips can reach Axel’s forehead and kisses it before pulling away slightly.

“I sent my mother your PT schedule.”

“K-” Axel starts to protest.

“You have to go to them.” Kaidan doesn’t look at him and his lips twitch slightly at the corners.

“Kaidan…” Axel groans.

“And I knew you were going to protest so I made sure my mother’s going to drive you to each appointment.”

Axel’s protest is a deep throaty growl.

Kaidan only smirks as he looks at him, giving him a coy look. “I love you. Be good while I’m gone.” He pecks his husband on the cheek one last time before heading out the door.

It’s going to be a lonely four weeks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Plate in hand, Axel heads out on the deck to enjoy his breakfast and coffee. Just when he’s about to sit down, he hears a whimper, one of pain. He’s pretty certain it didn’t come from him. Despite feeling like a rusty piece of junk metal, he wasn’t one to complain about his injuries. He puts his coffee down on the table, and listens carefully when he hears it again. It’s coming from under the deck.

He holds his plate in one hand and the railing with the other as he takes one step at a time. When he reaches the bottom level, he takes a knee carefully and then the other, then goes down on all fours to look under the deck where he finds the owner of the whimpering noise.

“Hey buddy. You lost?”

The dog growls at him, and he chuckles.

“Not the friendly type are we? Or are we having a bad day?”

Shifting himself into a sitting position, he rips a piece of the blueberry pancake and tosses it under the deck.

“Or maybe we’re just hungry?”

Without having any experience with dogs before, he really can’t tell what could possibly be the issue with the dog at the moment. One thing he does know; it might take a while to coax it from under the deck. I’ve got time buddy, lots of time.

Axel looks away, taking a few slow bites of his pancakes, and looks out to the ocean that’s calm in the horizon on this fine morning. When he looks back under the deck, the small piece of pancake is gone.

“It’s good uh? My husband made ‘em. Doesn’t want me on my feet too much while I’m recovering. We’re probably the same as you and I. Hurting?” He picks up a strip of bacon, biting off a big piece and tossing the rest under the deck. He watches as the dog takes tentative steps forward, sniffing the bacon and picking it up before hiding again.

“You’re gonna be like that.” Axel says as he bites into another one of his bacon strips and licks his fingers.

The dog looks up at Axel with pleading eyes after it finishes eating the strip of bacon and Axel chuckles. He tosses another strip of bacon and another piece of his pancake before he finishes off his plate.

“I’d stick around a little more but err…Ma’s gonna be here soon to take me to PT. But er…” he grunts as he gets up to his feet, his hip protesting against the movement. “How ‘bout I get you a bowl of water. It’s going to get warm today.”

He makes his way back up the stairs and back to the kitchen when he hears the front door opening. He pokes his head out of the kitchen and lifts a finger to warn his mother-in-law he’ll just be another a minute. Opening the cupboard doors to all the dishes, he grabs a bowl and heads to the sink to fill it up with water.

“I’m running a little behind, are you almost ready?”

“There’s a dog under the deck.”

“What?”

“Yeah, there’s a dog under the deck.”

“How did it get there?” Helena asks as she takes the bowl of water from Axel’s hands.

“I’ve no idea, but it must have been in the middle of the night because it wasn’t there yesterday, or I would have heard it. It was whimpering pretty bad. It’s not ready to come out though.”

Helena makes her way to the deck while Axel leans his back against the counter. “Sometimes it takes them a little bit to warm up to people, especially if they’ve been mistreated or dropped off somewhere.”

“Why would anyone do that?” Axel’s brows narrow in confusion. He’s never had pets other than his hamster and his fish, but he could never see himself hurting them. His hamster was able to be brought back home, but he made Kaidan promise to take care of his fish in his…no… now Kaidan’s captain quarters on the SR2. As much as he wanted to bring them back home, they just didn’t have the space to have an aquarium that size, despite having even more space in their home.

“Your guess is as good as mine.” She purses her lips and shrugs her shoulders as if to say I don’t know and makes her way down the stairs.

It doesn’t take her long to drop off the bowl and make her way back up the stairs. “I’ll get some dog food at the store and some peanut butter while at your appointment.” She tells him as they make their way to the front door.

Axel opens the passenger door of the skycar. “Peanut butter?”

Helena chuckles as she gets in the car and starts the engine as she closes her door. Axel climbs in the passenger seat, closing the door shut. “I keep forgetting you’re new to the whole animal thing. Yes, peanut butter. Dogs love it for some reason.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Week 2.

Axel grabs a bottle of water, a spoon, a fork, the container of peanuts, and his reheated dinner outside with him. Somehow managing to juggle all items in his hands and under his armpit as he holds onto the railing going down the stairs, grumbling to himself how he can’t wait for his legs to have the stability they used to have. Soon, hopefully.

Sitting down on the grass, he puts the water bottle down and his dinner. He notices the food he put in the bowl this morning had hardly been touched. He untwists the lid to the peanut butter and scoops it up with the spoon. So far, the dog has stayed out of arm’s reach, but Axel has managed to get it to eat from the spoon in his hands the last couple of days. It’s progress. He stretches his arm out and waits for the dog to approach. The dog approaches tentatively and slowly licks the peanut butter from the spoon. “Atta boy. I don’t know if you’re a boy, but I’m going to call you that for right now. Just easier. Hope you don’t mind.” The dog looks up at him and licks his snout. “It’s good, uh? I’m just going to put this down on the ground so I can eat as well.” Slowly, he lays the spoon on the grass.

He takes the lid off his container containing his dinner, and takes a bite.

He cracks open the lid to the water bottle and takes a good swig out of it before grabbing the dog’s bowl. He tosses the old water and pours the fresh water into and places it by the dog.

“I’ll be back tomorrow little guy.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Week 3.

A victory for Axel today when he feels the bump of a cold wet nose against his hand. He doesn’t move though. He lets the dog come to him on its own terms. He’s done such extensive research in the past few weeks that he’s happy his patience is starting to pay off. It’s been a fascinating way to spend the weeks outdoors and still manage to keep his promise to his husband while avoiding any hard physical activities that he is yet to get cleared for.

He spends his day outside, only going in to get some food occasionally and to use the washroom a couple times. He makes sure to bring the peanut butter in the evening when he knows it’s his last time coming out for the day. He makes sure the dog has food and water for the night.

The process is gradual for the rest of the week. But on Friday, the dog nudges Axel’s arm with his snout and sits beside him. Tucked under his arm. Axel pets the tuft of fur on the dog’s chest, a smile forming at the corners of his lips.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Week 4.

Axel is sitting on the bottom step of the staircase. He puts a dog treat on the grass right in front of it. He shimmies up one step.

So far, he’s managed to get the dog to trust him enough to allow him to pet it. But the evenings are getting colder and he wants to get the dog inside. There’s no way he was going to let it get stranded outside in September. He hates how the weather changes so drastically from day to night.

He places another treat on the second last bottom of the stairs and shimmies up another. He keeps doing this until he reaches the very top of the stairs.

The sound of the patio door opening makes him jump slightly.

“Axel? What are you doing? And why is there a bag of dog food on the counter?”

He’s been so focused on the dog this last month he forgot his husband was scheduled to be home today. Shit. He wanted to make dinner to surprise Kaidan. He curses at himself for being so distracted, but answers the question.

“I found a dog under our deck. It’s really apprehensive so I’ve been just slowly coaxing it out. Trying to get him inside.”

“A dog? How long has it been there?” Kaidan sits next to Axel. He puts a hand on the younger man’s thigh and pecks his cheek.

“Found him the day you left.”

Kaidan rests his head on Axel’s shoulder. “Been doing this since I left?”

He kisses the crown of Kaidan’s head, “Yeah.”

“You sure it’s a him?”

“I saw his ballsack.”

Kaidan chuckles.

The dog pokes his head around the railing, taking the treat before retreating back behind the stairs. Slowly, it comes back for more and slowly climbs the stairs. When it reaches half way, Kaidan and Axel retreat inside the house, but keep the door open.

About an hour later the dog finally comes inside, running towards Axel, tongue lolling It’s rewarded with head scratches and a kiss on the forehead. His black floppy ears, his bright blue eyes, the white dots on his black nose, and splotches of caramel in his white fur just made him too adorable to resist not petting him.

“Kai. Can we keep him?” Axel looks up at Kaidan, puppy eyes and all.

Kaidan contemplates a moment and Axel is sure is about to refurse, “Sure. I mean you’re alone a lot, he could be excellent company for those long periods I’m gone. Did you name him?”

“Naw. I don’t know what’s a good name for a dog.”

Kaidan smirks, “Mako.”

“I feel like this is a jab at me.”

“You’ll never know.”

“It’s a jab isn’t it? Kaidan…”

Kaidan guffaws on his way out of the kitchen.

#merweek2021 #Axel/Kaidan #How They Get Mako #day 6: Pet Day #Ghost Writes

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akimagies · 4 years

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Double Dates are Fun, Right?: Luke Alvez

Luke Alvez x F!Reader

WORD COUNT: 3,129

WARNINGS: cursing, alcohol consumption, mentions of driving while under the influence (i do not condone this! and even if you had only one drink please uber home or have a sober friend drive you home do not get behind the wheel)

SUMMERY: Kristy Simmons younger sister has had the worst love life know to man. So why not set her up with her husband’s best friend to see if the two hit it off.

A/N: so i had this idea pop into my head while i was stuck at work and now it’s almost 5 a.m. and i’m posting this! but please let me know if you want a part two cause i love this one so much!

The team had recently just returned from a case in New York which had involved an unsub who was kidnapping middle aged men and keeping them for about three days at a time, playing out a scenario with the middle aged men as if they were their father, and killing them at the end of it. All Matt wanted to do when he got back was lay down in his bed with his wife and get some rest before having to go back to work in the morning to finish up some reports. What he had expected when he came home was rowdy children running all around the house, while Kristy chased after them, trying to get them ready for bed. Yet, when he walked into the house, he was met with silence and the faint laughing coming from the kitchen. Matt took off his boots and left them by the front door before heading into the kitchen to see who was in the kitchen with his wife. To his surprise, he was met to the sight of Kristy and her younger sister, Y/N, and Kristy sitting at the kitchen table, with a bottle of wine opened. “Well, isn’t this is a pleasant surprise.” Matt said smiling as he took a seat next to his wife at the kitchen table. “So, why are you two drinking wine this time?” he asked, knowing that the two sisters only broke open a bottle of rosé when they wanted to gossip or rant to one another.

“One of the other teachers set Y/N up on a blind date, and it didn’t go as well as the woman told her it would.” Kristy said as she took a sip of her wine.

“My coworker told me that this guy was supposed to be ‘such a nice guy’ and that he had ‘a great sense of humor and was great to talk to’.” Y/N said before taking a large sip of her wine shaking her head. Watching her take the large gulp was a sign that this date definitely did not go well. “He was a complete asshole, with a stick up his ass. Oh, and that sense of humor was definitely not there tonight, he was probably one of the worst human beings on this earth to even try to have a conversation with.” she said to her brother-in-law shaking his head.

“I told her that it was just one bad date and there were other guys out there that are better for her.” Kristy told her husband before shaking her head. “But she keeps telling me that she’s done with it all.”

“So, what, you're done with blind dates that your coworkers set you on?” Matt asked the younger woman before standing up and walking towards the fridge to grab a beer for himself.

“Not just the blind dates, the dating apps, and maybe even dating in general. Maybe I was just meant to be the young, hip, single aunt that I am now. Then, later in life, a lonely spinstress, who’s only kid is her dog.” Y/N said smiling as she looked over at the two.

“Come on, I told you from the start it wasn’t a good idea, none of them actually know you that well to actually set you up on date with someone compatible with you.” Kristy said to her younger sister. An idea popped into her head as she looked at her sister smiling. “What if Matt set you up with one his friends at work? And instead of just going on some one on one blonde date, why don’t we go on a double date? We could get a babysitter to watch the kids, and I mean Matt and I do need a night away from the kids, so it could be fun!” Kristy suggested as Y/N gave her a skeptical look. “Come on, it is definitely not going to be as bad as this past one. Plus, if you can’t find something to talk about with the guy, at least you will have Matt or I to start a conversation to make it less awkward.” Kristy told her sister as she watched the gears start turn in her head.

“Fine, but this is the last and only time I allow anyone to put their hands on my love life again.” Y/N said before checking the time to see what time it was, and finally realizing how late it actually was. “Alright, it’s getting late, and I should probably go home before Molly chews through the door to get outside.” As she stood up, Y/N looked over at Matt. “And Matt, you better choose a nice guy.” She said before she started to head to the front door.

“Alright, I’ll try to pick some good for you. Do you want me to call you a cab to get you back home?” Matt asked Y/N as he watched her walk away.

“No, I should be good. I only had one glass of wine.” She said before hearing her sister correct her saying that she had two glasses of wine. “Hey! I don’t need a fed knowing that I had two glasses of wine.” Y/N called back laughing before opening the door. “Goodnight you two!” Y/N called out before shutting the front door behind her.

Once Matt heard the door close, he turned back to his wife shaking his head as he looked at her. “Who the hell do you expect me to set her up with?” Matt asked his wife laughing.

“I thought, maybe you could set her up with Luke.” Kristy said as she looked at her husband smiling, yet her husband didn’t share the same smile as her. “Come on. You know Luke the best out of your team, so it’s not going to take a lot of convincing for him to agree. We could even just go to the bar and have a few drinks.” Kristy suggested to her husband.

“Fine, I’ll ask Luke when I go into work tomorrow if he would be up for it. But, don’t get your hopes up in case he says no.” Matt said before standing up. “Alright, let’s go to bed before the kids decide to wake back up.” He told his wife chuckling.

☾ . ° . ⋆⠀┊---------------------------------------------------------------┊ ⋆⠀. ° . ☾

Matt had walked into the office hoping that Luke would say yes to his proposal. He didn’t want to upset either of the sisters, knowing that Y/N would interpret if he rejected her before even meeting her as she should definitely take that as a sign that she was meant to be alone for the rest of her life. Once Matt walked through the glass doors of the bullpen, he saw Luke sitting at his desk, working on some paperwork. Matt took a deep breath before walking over to Luke’s desk smiling at the man. “Hey, so do you have any plans this weekend?” Matt asked his friend as he leaned against his desk.

Luke looked up at his friend, before leaning back in his chair. “I was probably going to go on a hike with Roxy this weekend, but that was it, why? Do you want to school me in another round of basketball?” Luke asked him, laughing as he shook his head. The last time Luke had played Matt in basketball, Matt had destroyed him, and he definitely did not want to be embarrassed again by the man defeating him again.

“No, I thought you would maybe want to go out for a few rounds of drinks on Friday after work.” Matt told him.

“Oh, is the whole team going? Cause I really do not want to have deal with a drunk Garcia again after she drinks too many margaritas.” Luke told the man laughing.

“Oh no, it wouldn’t be with the team.” Matt said before watching Luke’s face turn confused at the man’s words. Matt was really trying to put off the question of asking Luke to go on a double date with him.

“You want to go out drinking when you could be home with Kristy and the kids?” It wasn’t really like Matt to go out and drink when he could be spending time with his wife and kids. Especially, since it was never guaranteed that they would have the weekend off.

“Well, Kristy would be coming with us.” Matt said, which made Luke even more confused.

“So, you want me to third wheel and Kristy and your date to the bar. I think I’ll pass dude.” Luke said laughing as he turned back to his computer shaking his head. He had no idea why Matt would think that Luke would just want to tag along with him and his wife to a bar on a Friday night.

“Well, you wouldn’t be third wheeling.” Matt said before letting out a sigh as he shook his head. “Kristy thought it would be a good idea to set you up with her younger sister. It would be a double date type of situation.” Matt said to his friend as he watched his friends face unwind from the confusion that was once on it. “Listen, even if you two don’t it off, you aren’t going to be sitting at home, bored on a Friday night. I’ll even pick up the tab, so all the drinks will be free.” He was really trying now to butter Luke up to say yes to coming to the bar.

The laugh that erupted out of Luke, which concerned Matt thinking that Luke thought this whole thing was a joke. “Dude, you didn’t have to go that far. I was going to say okay after you suggested the idea. I thought that I should start putting myself out there again after the break-up between Lisa and I.” Luke told his friend laughing as he shook his head. “But I’m definitely going to keep you up on the offer of still paying for those drinks.” Luke told his friend laughing before he turned back around to work on his paperwork.

Matt just shook his head as he let out a low laugh before sitting down at his desk. Matt knew that he was in for it Friday night, and just hoped that the tab wasn’t going to be ungodly high.

When Friday came around, Luke had met Matt at the bar a little earlier than the time they all decided to meet at, just so they could garb a table before it got packed at O’Keefe’s. “So, Kristy really thinks her sister and I are gonna hit it off?” Luke asked Matt as he took a sip of his beer as he looked over at his friend.

Matt shrugged his shoulders in response. “I have to sat, her friends that she has set up on dates all are still with the guys, so we’ll see how this goes.” Matt said to his friend smiling.

☾ . ° . ⋆⠀┊----------------------------------------------------------------┊ ⋆⠀. ° . ☾

Y/N laughed as she drove both herself and her sister to the bar that the four were meeting at. “So, you really think that this guy from Matt’s work is going to be a good match for me?” Y/N asked her sister as she pulled into the parking lot of O’Keefe’s.

“Yes, you’ve seen my match making skills in action. If you didn’t see the post on Facebook last week, Mike and Sandra just got engaged and they were my first couple I set up. So, I feel good about this Y/N.” Kristy told her sister as they exited the car and started to walk towards the entrance of O’Keefe’s. The bar was packed when the two of them entered, and Kristy soon started to scan the bar for her husband and his friend, soon finding the two talking at the table already. “See, there they are.” Kristy pointed out the two men sitting at one of the high-top tables.

Y/N had not felt this nervous since high school when she first went on a date with the guy, she was talking to for a couple weeks. She was surprised that her sister still knew her type, since it never really changed over the years. “How the hell do you expect me to talk to that man without stuttering like a crazy person?” Y/N asked her sister, which only caused Kristy to just start laughing as they approached the table.

Luke was looking down at his phone, checking his text to see that the dog sitter said that Roxy was doing fine when Matt hit his friends’ arm. “There’s Kristy and her sister.” Matt said nodding his head over in their direction. Luke had to admit that Kristy’s sister was definitely attractive in his eyes but looks didn’t really matter. He needed to get to know her first before he made any decision.

“Y/N this is Luke, Luke this is Kristy’s younger sister Y/N.” Matt said introducing the two. The two shook hands saying that it was nice to meet each other as the women got settled in at the table. “What so funny that has you laughing?” Matt asked his wife as the two girls sat down at the table.

“Oh, Y/N just told me a funny story. Y/N, why don’t you tell the guys what you just told me?” Kristy said, suggesting that her sister tell the two men one of her stories that she had. Y/N smiled over at her sister, already knowing the story that she was going to say.

“Oh, I will, just promise you won’t spoil the end?” Y/N asked her sister as she watched her nod her head in approval. “So, I thought today when I walked into my classroom that it was going to be a smooth day.” She said before getting interrupted by Luke.

“So, you’re a teacher, what grade do you teach?” Luke asked the woman that sat next to him.

“Yeah, I teach kindergarten, and usually since it’s a Friday. The kids are calm since they finally are back in their swing of going to school. Yet, for some reason today I swear it was a full moon.” Y/N said laughing as she shook her head. “I have this one kid in my class that thinks it’s fun to bite the other kids. Well, there was this little girl that thought today after he bit her, that she should stand up to him.” She told the group.

“Let me guess, she yelled at the little boy to tell him to stop?” Luke asked, thinking that the story was going to end that way.

“Oh no. The little girl punched him in the nose, and I then had to deal with the little boy having bloody nose.” She said, which caused Luke and Matt to start bursting out laughing. “When I asked the little girl why she punched him, she told me that her dad taught her that if she was ever hurt to fight back. That then lead me to having to teach her that hands aren’t made for hitting. So now on Monday, I have to deal with a meeting with the parents of the little girl and the little boy.” Y/N said shaking her head. “So, my next question is, Matt what time are you available on Monday to discuss Chloe’s actions.” She said smiling as she took a sip of her beer, which only made Luke laugh harder as Matt’s face dropped.

“She did not punch a kid.” Matt said sighing as he dropped his head shaking it at the thought of one of his twins punching another classmate because he bit her.

“Oh yes she did.” Kristy sighed as she took a sip of her wine as she looked at her husband.

Y/N’s phone soon buzzed as she pulled it out of her purse. “Sorry, my neighbor just wanted to let me know that she just stopped in to check on Molly.” Y/N said before putting her phone in her purse again.

“Is Molly your daughter?” Luke asked as Y/N let out a laugh while shaking her head.

“No, unless you count her as a fur baby.” She said smiling as she looked at Luke. “Molly is my dog, specifically a German Shorthaired Pointer.” Y/N told him as she sat back in her seat. “Do you have any pets?” she asked Luke, genuinely wanting to know.

“Yeah, I have a Belgian Malinois named Roxy, she’s my girl.” Luke told her smiling. “Every morning before I have to go in to work, I usually go on a run with her. She’s is definitely a ball of energy.” Luke told the girl chuckling.

“I usually take Molly out after I get off of work. Usually on some of the trails that are near my apartment. But on the weekends, I usually go on some hiking trails with her.” Y/N told Luke smiling.

The two soon forgot about the other couple even being there as they started to talk about their lives to each other and shared hobbies that the two of them had. Y/N laughed at the fact that Luke would burn almost any meal that he tried to make, and Luke couldn’t stop laughing at the fact that Y/N had in a hangover mess, wore two different shoes to work, and had a kid point it out before she even realized. Matt and Kristy had snuck out about an hour ago, since their sitter wasn’t going to stay all night watching the four kids just for them.

Luke and Y/N soon left the bar once they heard the bartender say that it would be the last call for drinks. The two of them soon walked outside together. “I had a lot of fun tonight.” Luke told the woman who stood in front of him smiling.

“So did I.” Y/N said as she looked up at the caramel skin man. “You know, I planned on taking Molly for a hike at Harpers Ferry national Historical Park tomorrow. Do you think Roxy and you would want to join us?” Y/N asked the man smiling.

“We would love to join you guys.” Luke said smiling before grabbing her phone and texting his number, so the phone number was stored in her phone. “And now you have my number so we can text about what time to meet.” Luke said to her smiling as he handed her back her phone.

“Well, I guess we’ll see you tomorrow than.” Y/N said smiling before she started to walk backwards to her car. “Goodnight Luke.” She said as a bright smile lit up her face.

“Goodnight Y/N.” Luke said before turning around and waking back to his vehicle, and in that moment, Luke knew he was head over heels for her.

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mcwriting · 4 years

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The Marriage Project (3)

Anddddd I’m back with this bby. Sorry I’ve been slowing down some of my content. Last Friday I had to deal with family health matters on top of schoolwork and a sorority function I had to be at. Anyways.

High school AU. Tom Holland. Yeah.

Story Masterlist

Warnings: mild language

Rating: Between T and M

Word Count: 2351

% approximately the 3rd week of September %

You’d had two away volleyball games that week and Tom had an away football game, so by Saturday you were exhausted. Your Friday game hadn’t been too far, but the football team had traveled a decent distance, so you figured they’d gotten home late.

You still showed up at Tom’s on time, though, as planned the day before.

Nikki opened the door at your arrival.

“Oh, hey, y/n! Come on in!”

You returned her greeting and entered, looking around expectantly.

“If you’re looking for Tom, he’s not up yet. They got home pretty late last night.”

“I figured that would be the case.”

You noticed that on the dining room table were a few grocery bags.

“Oh, do you need help with those? I can wait on Tom,” you offered.

“No don’t worry about those bags, but if you’re looking to do something, I was about to make some apple pies for a get together tomorrow. I’d love your help.”

You agreed and followed her into the kitchen. After peeling and chopping apples for a few minutes, someone else walked into the kitchen.

“Well who’s this? I don’t remember having a daughter,” Tom’s dad said. You turned to look at him and smile, then continued cutting fruit.

“Oh Dominic you know y/n. She’s the one Tom’s always talking about, competing and whatnot. They’re doing that marriage project together.”

Your face heated up so you continued to look down at the apple.

He talks about me? Like how much he hates me or what?

“Yes of course, how could I forget? You’re one of the best soccer players I’ve seen! Good to see you again,” he said.

“Nice seeing you, too, Mr. Holland.”

“Please, call me Dom. Now how come you’re down here and not with Tom?”

“I was waiting for him to get up. Plus, Nikki promised me a slice,” you grinned.

“Well I’d definitely call that a fair trade. Nikki’s pies are the best in the world,” he turned to his wife, “I’ll be back in a bit. I’m meeting with the publisher today.”

“Good luck, honey. I’m sure you’ll be great,” Nikki encouraged, giving her husband a quick peck.

“Thanks, dear. Once again, it was nice seeing you, y/n. Feel free to come make desserts here any time,” he joked and you just laughed and waved.

A few minutes after he’d left, Nikki spoke up again.

“You know, y/n. I’m glad you and Tom were paired up for this project. I’ve really liked having you around the past few weeks, and it seems like Tom has learned a lot from you. I mean, He even went out and bought some pads and tampons and things for his bathroom this week.”

Now your face really burned.

“He did?”

“Yeah. He said he’d better be safe than sorry. I’m glad you two look out for each other like that, even if you are rivals. By the way, I made sure he didn’t get the cardboard ones,” she added. With that, you fell into rhythmic silence.

Not long after, you heard footsteps coming down the stairs. From the hall, Tom’s voice called out.

“Mom? It’s almost 2. Have you heard anything from-” he walked through the kitchen door. “Oh. You’re here. What are you doing?”

You grabbed a towel to wipe off your hands as you turned to face him.

“I got here at 1 but felt bad about you getting home late so I’ve just been helping your mom make pie. She promised me a slice.”

“You’re really gonna give her some mom? She doesn’t even deserve to see how they’re made!”

“Oh Tom I swear. Y/n is a nice girl, just get over yourself. But, if you two want to go get to work I think I’ve got it handled from here. I’ll bring you both some when the first one’s done.”

You grabbed your bag and headed up behind Tom and got to work quickly. Eventually you took a break when Nikki brought up pie and ice cream as promised with a couple waters.

You ate in silence, Tom leaned against his bed and you against the wall across from him, when something she had said earlier popped into your head.

“Hey, Tom?”

“Yeah princess?” he replied, not looking up. You rolled your eyes and continued.

“Your mom said something earlier that I wanted to ask about.”

“If she told you anything incriminating it’s not true.”

“Suuuureeee. Anyways, she said you, uh, stocked up your cabinet in the bathroom. That’s really cool of you.”

“Yeah, well, can’t have you bleeding everywhere now can we? But, em. Yeah. The fact that you were so panicked over something that seems so trivial spoke pretty loud. I thought it’s better to just stay safe.”

You sat in silence for a little bit, just eating.

“Mind if I ask you something?” he said.

“Shoot.”

“What does it feel like? You know? They don’t mention that stuff in health articles.”

You contemplated for a little bit before answering.

“Well… like I said before, it’s different for everyone, but I’ll try my best. Cramps are kinda like being scratched and punched from the inside all at once. Freebleeding just feels like… wet and sticky. I find it disgusting so I wear mostly tampons.”

“Interesting. Thanks, princess.”

Once finishing off your snack, you got back to work. By the time you were done, it was almost 4.

“See you Monday, y/n”

“Yep. Oh, by the way, I have a small volleyball tournament next weekend so I can’t do Saturday. Is Sunday okay or do you wanna get together another day?”

“Can you do Thursday? We just have morning workouts that day.”

“Yeah I have practice last period so I’ll just shower and meet you in the parking lot? We can go to my place.”

“Can’t. I have to take the boys home.”

“If you want, you can take them home and I’ll pick you up. It’ll give me time to shower and change and then we can just carpool.”

“I don’t know. Sure you even know how to drive?”

“I’ll have you know I passed that test with flying colors sophomore year.”

Eventually he agreed and with that you were back out the door, giving one final thanks to Nikki.

By Wednesday you and Tom had finished your little quilt and Mrs. Flynn loved it.

You and Tom obviously didn’t play when it came to grades, even if it was home economics.

Thursday, you were leaving your last class before practice and reminded Tom you were picking him up that afternoon, to which his friends looked at him funny and kinda messed with him.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

When you pulled up into his driveway after school, he plopped into the passenger's seat and held out a foil-wrapped object in his left hand.

“What is that?” you asked.

“My mom wanted you to have it. She made bread.”

“Oh. Well thanks. I’ll have to thank her for it next time I see her. You can just set it in the back seat for now.”

You drove back to your place, pulling into the garage and leading Tom through the door. Your parents were still at work, so you told Tom you’d just work in the living room.

“I don’t want them to say anything weird about us being home alone in my room,” you explained.

You sat on the floor quietly typing when you remembered something.

“Hey, how did you do on the calc test?”

“95. You?”

“Damn. 94. I’ll make a comeback next time,” you joked, earning an eye roll.

After a half hour, your mom came home.

“Hey honey, how was your day? Did you beat Tom in whatever you were competing with him in today?” she asked, part joking since she knew of your rivalry well.

“It was fine, and mom. We have a guest, remember?” you said through gritted teeth.

She looked over the couch, where she found Tom waving at her awkwardly.

“Oh. Hi there. I forgot you were coming over today. So sorry about that.”

“No worries, Mrs. y/l/n. I beat her by a point today so it evens out,” he joked. You were annoyed at his banter with your mom and cut it off.

“Okay, well, Tom. Let’s go finish this in my room now that my mom’s home,” you said, getting everything and carrying it to the bedroom.

You tossed your bag and papers on the floor and quickly picked up some random things laying around, such as a pair of volleyball shoes and stray athletic socks. You especially rushed to snatch a rogue lace bra.

From the corner of your eye, you could see Tom standing still, looking around the room like you had the first time at his house.

Your walls were light grey but covered in your paintings and other art. One shelf mounted to a wall held all of your ribbons and trophies from sports, quiz bowl, and art fairs. Your bedspread was baby pink and sheets light yellow, and the same pink was strewn around the room in the form of desk accents and other blankets. You had a large plush cat resting near your pillows.

“Wow. So you’re like… a real girl. Huh.” he stated flatly. You stood up from tossing everything into your closet.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“Well, like, you’re all tough and smart and sporty but you have pink everywhere and a stuffed animal on your bed.”

“You do realize women are complex creatures right? Considering we’re human and all?”

“Yeah, of course. I guess I’ve just never seen this side of you. I shouldn’t have worded it that way. Sorry.”

It surprised you to hear Tom apologize over something so small. Usually he would stand his ground, wave you off, or just move on.

“It’s fine. I just hate when people stereotype, you know? Like I can love science, art, sports, pink, sweatpants, and skirts all at the same time. And I do. And I’m not trying to sound like the ‘I’m not like other girls’ girl, because I am a girl, but I’m more than just one side or the other.”

“So why do you hide the ‘typically girly’ stuff? I’ve never seen you at school wearing a pink dress and makeup. I mean even at dances you always wear dark colors and at parties I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in something other than jeans or shorts.”

You shrugged as you made your way onto the floor next to your computer, Tom following suit.

“I guess I try to stick to one aesthetic. I mean, it already seems to shock the administration that I’m good at and enjoy doing two sports, art, and honors stuff. I don’t think they could handle another layer of me,” you chuckled. “Isn’t there anything you hide?”

He thought about it for a few seconds, leaning his head against the wall.

“Well, I guess you know this now, but I like Spider-Man.”

“Yeah, but it’s considered normal for guys to like comic book characters. When I tell people I like Spider-Man, they just assume I have a crush on the actor. Come on, there has to be something you don’t show off at school.”

“Okay fine. I’ve got a couple. One, I actually like to cook. A lot. It almost kills me to be partnered up with the guys sometimes because they’re so clueless in the kitchen. And two, I love dance. I did it for a bit as a kid but got embarrassed and decided to go the normal sports route. I still go to the Nutcracker every year, though.”

You found yourself smiling at his honesty.

“Really? You know my mom put me in little kid ballet classes for a while, but I was really disruptive in class because I had too much energy, so I got into other sports instead. Has the football team never done a ballet class? I know some schools make them.”

“One summer. Maybe two years ago? We were doing a team building thing and they made us take one. I couldn’t make myself pretend to be bad so I just let everyone believe I was a natural talent,” he laughed, causing you to do the same. “You should’ve seen those guys. That’s probably one of my best football memories.”

You both sit in comfortable silence for a while. You couldn’t remember a time that you both were open to each other without the slightest bit of tension.

After a few more moments, you both got back to work.

You didn’t realize that it was past 5 o’clock until your mother was at your doorway telling you dinner was ready.

“Feel free to stay. We’d love to have you for dinner, Tom,” she offered, then went back to the kitchen.

“Do you mind? I can just walk home if not.”

“Just stay, man. What’s one dinner? I’d feel at least somewhat bad to make you walk all the way home. We’re done for the week anyways, so I’ll just drive you after we eat.”

You led him to the kitchen, where your mom had cooked some ravioli and tossed a salad. You built your plates and thanked your mom, then sat at the dining room table.

You ate in awkward silence since your parents were in the living room. Your dad had greeted you and Tom when he came home from work, not really realizing who Tom was.

Once your plates were practically cleaned, you cleared the table and took Tom home.

“Thanks again for dinner and driving me. Good luck this weekend.”

Who is this guy and where did he take Tom? He never wishes me luck.

“Yeah no problem. Thank your mom for the bread. And good luck on your game tomorrow, too. I hear it’s gonna be a tough one.”

”They just haven’t met me yet,” he joked, then got out of the car and headed to the door. He tossed one last wave back as you pulled away.

A/N: I’m happy to be posting the next part and with the free time that I have at the moment of formatting this I’m hoping that I can reedit ch 4 and have it up by next week. As always, love you all and thanks for reading!

If you want to be added to TMP or my permanent tag list, please send an ask/message so I can verify that you get added!

Story Tag List: @jackiehollanderr, @one-big-fangirl, @l0lmk, @primadonnasdream, @bookworm06, @thenoddingbunny-blog

#The Marriage Project #tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x you #Harry Holland #sam holland #tom holland au #spider-man #tom holland spider man

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mosh-4 · 4 years

Text

when you were sleeping

harry styles imagine

when you were sleeping - your family has a crisis when he’s away.

warning: angst. suicide

you and Harry were currently braving a long distance relationship. it was difficult, but you both managed. you loved him, but you were also a very independent person. you didn’t need to be constantly surrounded by him to know that he loved you. you were on your last year of college, and he was in Tokyo writing music. you both had goals and were striving for them together.

from where you lived, Tokyo was 14 hours ahead. that meant you could only talk to Harry from 6 pm to 2 am your time, which would be 8 am to 4 pm his time. you only could talk to him within those 8 hours since you both had to sleep at some point and he also had to write music. it got to be frustrating, but you made it work.

you received your daily call from Harry when you were laying in bed. it was midnight where you were, 2 pm where he was. you decided to come home to visit your family since your university was having a 4 day weekend. you had thursday and friday off going into the weekend. it was nice. you got to see your dogs and eat home cooked meals.

“i think ‘m gonna have a late night tonight,” Harry muttered through the phone.

“oh yeah,” you said brushing a hand through your almost dry hair.

“yeah,” he said. “some of the guys want to go out tonight.”

you laugh. “sounds fun.” you roll onto your stomach. “when can i expect you to be awake?”

he laughed. Harry was big on getting up early. most days he got up at 8 am, sometimes 9 am if he was pushing it, but on mornings after nights he stayed out late, he tended to get up from 10 am to 11 am, if it was really late, he even slept until noon.

“i don’t want to stay out past 3 so hopefully no later than 10.”

you laugh. “okay, you goof. text me when you go to sleep so i know you’re still alive.”

“will do. how did your test go?” he asked changing the subject.

“it was good…” you continued to tell him about how well you did, and you began to talk about the production you were currently working on at school.

on thursday at 1:43 pm, you received a text.

harry: night night lovie

you laughed to yourself in the kitchen as you made yourself a cup of tea. your boyfriend was a goof. it was 3:43 am his time. you knew he wouldn’t be awake until at least noon his time. it wasn’t so horrible for him to sleep in. he got a lot of writing done this week. you remember him telling you about one of the songs he was working on and how it was almost complete.

you finished making yourself a cup of tea and took a seat on the couch with your two dogs putting on a movie you found on tv.

it was 5:36 pm. you had just gotten home from visiting with some of your friends from high school who were home on an early fall break. you were soaking wet from the rain. you were still home alone. your parents were at your brother’s teacher night at school, and your brother was at his football practice. you let the dogs out and gave them their dinner.

you decided to call your cousin, Lauren, to check in on her. she was the same age as your brother, and you three were extremely close along with your other cousin Collin, who was three years older than you.

when she answered the phone, your whole world came crashing down.

“hey,” you chirped into the phone before you could hear her cry.

in a shaky voice, she said, “(y/n).” she let out a few quick sobs before she finally spoke again. “Collin killed himself.”

you stood frozen in the doorway of your kitchen. “what?”

“Collin killed himself, i found him in his closet, and i screamed for my mom, and then i fell down the stairs and i scared the dogs, and Collin’s dead.”

your voice was caught in your throat. you knew Collin was suffering from depression, and it hadn’t been good for a while. you didn’t know it was this bad. you finally spoke. “oh baby,” you said gently. she cried harder. “do you want me to come there? do you need me to come to you?”

“no,” she said. “my mom has to call 911. i have to call my brothers. i have to go, (y/n), i have to go.”

with that, she hung up the phone quickly. you stood in your kitchen. numb. you felt incredibly numb. you had to do something. he couldn’t be dead. he wasn’t. this wasn’t real. everything’s fine. you’re crying now. when did you start crying? you had to call your mom. you had to tell them. oh god. your brother. he and Collin were best friends. they were so close despite their difference in age. how were you going to tell him.

you rung your mom’s phone. no answer. you rung your dad’s phone. no answer. they were probably meeting with a teacher. you would have to wait.

you heard the garage door open. the dogs went crazy as your brother came into the kitchen with his football bag and backpack in arms.

“hey,” he called to you while petting the dogs.

you cleared your throat. “Tom,” you took a breath to keep yourself from crying. he looked up at you as he put his bags on the floor by the kitchen table. “Tom, Collin killed himself.”

“what?” your brother peered up at you confused.

“Collin killed himself.” you said with tears in your eyes.

he sat himself in a chair at the kitchen table with his head hanging. you wrapped your arms around him and cried with him.

“can i use your phone to call mom and dad?”

he nodded and placed his phone on the table.

it was 6:27 pm. you were driving to your cousin’s house after you called her to tell her your parents were on their way there. she told you to come too.

when you arrived at their house, a police car was placed outside in front. you saw your oldest cousin’s husband standing outside handing his baby to his parents to take for the night. he caught you and Tom before you could go into the house. he pulled you both into a hug.

“just warning you, it’s not easy in there. you can’t see him. he’s still upstairs. they have the room taped off.”

he led you both inside to where everyone was gathered. the house was dark. your family was sitting in a dark room crying. you pulled your aunt into a hug as you both cried in each other’s arms. she let go of you and pointed a shaky finger to Lauren, who was curled up on a couch crying.

“she needs you. go to your buddy.”

you and Tom collapsed onto the couch with her and sandwiched her into a hug. all three of you sobbed into each other’s arms.

later that night, you cried with your family and listened to your aunt and cousins talk about how bad his depression was. you stood with your cousins when they brought him downstairs on a stretcher. you watched as your aunt and dad said their goodbyes to him. after his dad left, your dad was the closest thing he had to a father, and Collin was the only one who could make your dad laugh like a little kid. your mom held you as your cried. you watched as they placed him into the ambulance and took him away.

10:14 pm. 1 missed call from Harry Styles.

1 message:

harry: hi lovie, i survived the night

you left him on read.

the next morning, your eyes were swollen and raw. you woke up a little after 9:30. you saw another message from Harry at 11:26 pm.

harry: goodnight love. i’ll call you again tomorrow.

you left him on read again. you don’t mean to be a bitch. you’re still processing.

Harry noticed you left him on read again. you normally would respond fairly quickly, and you never went to bed before midnight. he found your lack of response odd. it was 11:45 pm his time. he decided to catch at least a few hours of sleep and to call you at 6 am, which would be 4 pm your time.

he woke up at 6:12 am. he rubbed his sleepy eyes before grabbing a drink. he cleared his throat, and he picked up his phone.

it was 4:23 pm. you were sitting on the floor of your grandparents living room. your cousins were surrounding you as the adults sat in the kitchen. you were playing with your oldest cousin’s 1 and a half year old daughter. she was the only thing that kept your spirits up.

your phone began to ring. Harry’s contact picture appeared on your screen. you watched your phone as it rang. your eyes began to cloud with tears.

“answer it,” Lauren said as she caught her niece in her arms, who was running back and forth between her and her sister tackling everyone in hugs. she was so young yet she understood that we were sad and needed comfort.

you nodded to her. clearing your throat and sliding to answer the phone, you walk outside to sit on the front porch.

“hey lovie.”

“hi haz,” you let out in a raspy voice. it had been a while since you had actually spoken.

Harry could tell you had been crying. your raspy voice was a telling sign.

“hey, what’s wrong? are you okay?” Harry’s eyebrows were furrowed together as he heard her shaky breath through the phone.

“Harry, my cousin killed himself last night.” you blink back tears as you drop your head into your hand.

“oh love,” he said gently. “i can’t imagine how you feel right now.” he didn’t know what to say. who was it? which one?, he thought to himself.

“it’s okay, haz. i’m sorry i ignored you. i just didn’t know what to say-”

“no, no. it’s okay. i understand. you don’t need to apologize.” he took a breath to calm his voice. what he would give to be there right now for her. to hold her as she cried. he felt horrible that he wasn’t there. “do you want me to come home?”

“no. that’s okay.” you said. he felt like she had punched him in the gut. she doesn’t want me there, he thought. “i know you’re busy and working right now. you don’t need to come home for this. i’ll be okay.”

you lied. you wanted him there. you wanted him to hold you and to rub your back as you cried. but, you know his work is important. so you lied. you told him you were gonna be fine. you were most definitely not fine. you had a hole in your heart. someone so loved and brilliantly smart and witty who could make the whole room smile was gone, and you were not okay with that.

“you’re important too,” harry started. he wasn’t going to let her push him away. “i know you like to be an independent person, and you don’t like to depend on people, but you can depend on me. i want to be there for you. it hurts me that i can’t be there for your right now. i love you so much, and i wish i could take the pain away for you. can i be there for you? can i come home to you?”

you burst into tears. you had tried so hard to hold them in. “yeah. okay,” you let out in a shaky voice. you couldn’t see anymore. your eyes were blurred by the tears. “come home to me.”

“okay. i’m coming home to you. ‘m gonna book a flight, and ‘ll text you when i find out when i land.”

“mkay,” you said your voice thick from the tears.

Harry landed at 8 am on saturday morning. you picked him up at the airport, and silently waited at the baggage claim for his luggage holding his hand. you had been quiet since he arrived. you were scared that you would burst into tears if you said anything.

you broke down when you got to your car. he held you in the parking lot of the airport as you sobbed into his chest. he took your keys and drove you home.

later saturday afternoon, you, your family, and Harry were at your aunt’s house. you were sitting with your mom, aunt, Lauren, and her older sister. you were putting together a photo board and were looking through pictures of Collin. you reminisced with Lauren about funny moments with him on your numerous family vacations.

your dad and brother were running around town to each department store to find green ties for each of the men in your family. Collin’s favorite basketball team was the Boston Celtics. his signature look was khaki shorts with a Celtics jersey or some sort of Celtics apparel. he wore mostly green. the men were wearing green ties as a tribute to him.

Harry was in the kitchen unboxing pizzas he ordered for everyone. he couldn’t really do much so he made himself useful by getting everyone food. you were extremely grateful for him.

the funeral was monday. you had to get up early to drive to the service. you were sitting at the vanity table in your room doing your makeup while Harry stood in front of your mirror putting on his cuff-links. he was wearing a simple black suit. his tie was hanging untied around his neck. you put the finishing touch on your hair and makeup and moved onto putting on your earrings.

your dad knocked on your bedroom door just as Harry was about to tie his tie. you both looked up at your dad.

“i-uh,” he started to say looking from you to Harry. “i have an extra green tie.” he looked down to the tie in his hands before reaching it out to Harry. “would you wear this today?”

Harry gently took the tie from your dad’s hands. your eyes welled with tears. Harry looked up from the tie and into your dad’s eyes, which were red from crying.

“i would be honored.” Harry spoke removing his tie to replace it with the green one. he tied it swiftly in the mirror before turning back to your father.

your dad nodded in approval, not saying much. it warmed your heart just as it broke it. that had meant a lot to your dad. he had allowed Harry to take part in this extremely difficult day, not as just a boyfriend of his daughter, but as a member of your family.

his voice broke you out of your thoughts. “we are leaving in 10.”

the funeral was a blur. Tom and your cousins were the pallbearers. Harry stood by your side the whole time. his arm around you or his hand holding yours. it was a difficult day. your makeup was trashed. your eyes were red and raw. Harry got you some food at the luncheon afterwards. he made you eat a few bites every now and then.

when you got home, you just wanted to crawl in bed and sleep. he helped you take your dress and jewelry off. you put on your comfy clothes while he grabbed you a makeup remover wipe, and he helped you take your makeup off. he let you climb in bed with the shade over your window drawn down darkening your room. he got out of his suit and changed into his comfy clothes before crawling into bed next to you.

you cried in his arms, and you were so grateful for him being there.

hope you enjoyed. i know this was a bit darker. it was inspired by my cousin who passed in october. - mosh

#harrystyles #harry styles imagine #harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles imagines #harry styles angst

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konako · 3 years

Text

DO YOU HAVE ART IDEAS FOR SIDCU? I’m dying to draw more!! #because ya know i’m in the process of drawing this really sad red snow comic#and i could use some light times in between

I don’t understand. What do you mean sad Red Snow? Who would hurt their precious relationship that is healthy beyond any shadow of a doubt?

David says it’s time to take the kids on a fishing trip. So he packs Emma, Henry and Neal. But it’s a dad thing, so Snow has a long week-end off. She calls Ruby. “Oh, I’m so sorry, Friday night? Yeah, um, Granny has me working… we’re re-doing some of the rooms in the b&b, gonna… paint… walls…” “Oh, okay, maybe something on Saturday?” “Maybe.” She calls Regina next. “Friday? At night? I have a ton of paper work to do, some revisions on the budget. You know that pothole on Main Street… well, I have to wait on some numbers and will probably work late and get too tired afterwards.” “Okay, that sounds important.”

Ruby and Regina had date plans, but now they don’t dare to go outside, because Snow can’t see them! They decide to stay in at Regina’s. It’s not like it matters what they do, how about starting with the naked business right away, it’s been like two weeks (if you don’t count that one quick kiss in front of Gold’s pawn shop, right when Snow walked out and they pretended they had just bumped into each other and Regina cussing at Ruby for not looking where she’s going).

Well, so Regina and Ruby have fun. They know Henry won’t be home, there is nobody there who could bother them. When Ruby comes in there is a very long greeting. Mostly it’s Regina getting pushed against the wall and held in place. When Ruby gets too feisty she teleports to the bedroom and… yeah, they have fun there. Doesn’t matter that the food is getting cold.

Ruby runs downstairs to pick that up after some… they need more energy, okay?! Running naked through Regina’s house is kinda fun though. She tells Regina who is like “you’re a kinky woman”. And they get childish, because ten minutes later they both run to the kitchen to get something to drink and it becomes a round of catch, even though it’s unclear who could even lose.

Now, Ruby keeps the lights off of course. Regina cries foul to that. But she can manage with a little spell for a tiny light ball instead of a flashlight.

So. Snow. She couldn’t find anybody for a Friday night date. Why is everybody busy with husbands or work? Ugh. She goes for a walk. And then she passes Regina’s house. And that’s odd. There is a light on in the bedroom. And somebody is clearly walking around in there. There! Light moving! She moves closer and definitely hears furniture getting moved. (She can’t know that Ruby tried to jump over the dining table to get to Regina and took down the chairs instead. Regina is appalled. Ruby grabs the table cloth she uses as a toga now.)

A ROBBERY!! Somebody broke into Regina’s house and is robbing the place! Oh no, but David and Emma aren’t even here. The sheriffs are gone! What is Snow supposed to do?? She gets her phone out. In her head she can hear David’s voice “Do not engage, you should call for help.” Snow nods to herself. “Got it, I’m here to help.” She picks up a garden gnome as a weapon (it’s a hideous gnome, Regina hates it, it’s why Emma gifted it to her) and then tries to find her way in.

By now Ruby is pinning Regina to the ground (there’s a theme tonight), thigh between her legs, growling. “Madam Mayor, your time is-” A pause. She looks up. There was the sound of a door. She sniffs (very Wolverine of her). Eyes widen in horror. “Snow is here!” And right this moment Snow has found the silhouette of the presumable robber, flings herself at it. Regina has time to poof away.

Now Snow straddles Ruby, gnome over her head about to strike. “Snow!” *blink blink* “Ruby???” Regina - now wearing her clothes, but her face still flush and anybody who would pay a minimum attention would notice the swollen lips, the horny radiance, the disheveled hair - comes in, flips on the light switch. “What is going on here?”

Snow looks between the two, slowly putting down the gnome. “I was about to ask the same.” - “This is my house.” “You said you’d be working late.” - “It was faster than I expected.” Snow looks back to Ruby. “What are you doing here? And why are you practically naked? What about the renovation?” - “My clothes… are dirty… spilled paint all over myself.” “But why are you here?” - “Regina came by… because…..” “The street in front of the b&b is part of the budget issue. So.. I went there.” “Right, she came in and saw me… painting… and had some work to do here… and… asked… for help…” “So you went home with Regina, painted some wall here and had an accident with the paint?” Both: “Exactly!”

Regina looks around. Well, the upstairs hallway was something she wanted to re.do for a while. One flick of the wrist and now there’s a wall covered in wet paint.

“I think the dryer must be almost done, Miss Lucas. Thanks for your patience.”

“No problem. I’m just sorry I was so clumsy. And again. Here in the dining room. I should’ve switched on the light. Get too comfortable walking in the dark.”

Snow blinks. Looking from one to the other again. She stands up, lending Ruby a hand. “I thought somebody was robbing your house!”

“And thank you for trying to catch the thieves.”

Ruby and Snow leave together fifteen minutes later. “It was nice of you to do that for her. I just don’t understand why she didn’t just magically renovate her place.”

“I think she’s trying this thing where she relies less on magic. And also asking for help more.”

“Makes sense.” Snow interlinks her arm with Ruby’s. “Your a good friend, Red. Glad you two are getting along a bit more.”

“Yeah, Regina’s alright…”

“I’m thinking about girls night tomorrow, you two have to come.”

Ruby smiles, but screams in her head ‘coming was the plan for tonight………’

#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HOLY FUCKING SHIT AAAAAAAAA i'm dying laughing #red snow #red queen #ruby lucas #ruby x regina #ruby x snow #ouat #star #FANTASTIC ADDITION TO #SIDCU #Ruby getting straddled and interrogated because Regina is much smoother with her escape plans and Ruby #the worst liar in Storybrooke #has to come up with a cover story #TORTURE #huh torture and red snow straddling uhuhhuh huhu mmmm #submission

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pixie88 · 3 years

Text

Tease

Chapter 9 - Together - Adam & Ellie.

A/N: Thank you again for proof reading and scene ideas lovely @aussieez you are a star! This chapter I wrote the NSFW scene after I had a few drinks Friday night, so I hope I got all the mistakes out. It also includes something that happened to me in RL I’ll leave it up to you to guess what it is haha. Hopefully you find it funny as I have we need to laugh atm. I hope you like it!

If you like it let me know or if you don’t still tell me why I won’t be offended!

I am only tagging those who have asked to be tagged in this new series from now on as I don’t want to annoying people with tags. So Let me know if you would like to be tagged and if I missed anyone sorry just let me know!

Find previous chapters HERE under Together - Adam & Ellie.

Song: Sia - Helium

Word count: 2123

WARNINGS: ⚠️ Fluffy fluff, NSFW, Mild Angst & adult language.

Pairings: Adam x Ellie.

Enjoy!

After Nina and I had our nails done we did a bit of baby clothes shopping followed by lunch, which after Nina had a few drinks, so it turned into dinner too "Nina, can I tell you something?"

"Of course sweetie!"

"You can't tell Al! Adam and I were thinking Charlie could have Alistair as a middle name. Do you think he'll like it?"

"Oh, Ellie he will love that. That's so sweet!" she gets up and hugs me.

"Did you hear that Charlie bear you are going to be named after the two greatest men you could wish for"

I tear up a little "Nina, that's a lovely thing to say!"

She hugs me again "Aww Ellie, I didn't mean to make you cry, but let me elaborate on that"

I laugh wiping my tears "Ellie, I can tell your dad must have been a great man because you are a sweet girl and you adore my Adam. This is why I know you two will be great parents" This makes me even more emotional.

We finally get back about half 10 Adam and Al are already in bed, I open our bedroom door expecting him to be asleep, but I'm greeted by him in bed in just his boxers on his phone, he gives me that gorgeous smile "Did you have a good day beautiful?"

I start getting undressed "Hey, yeah, it was such a laugh your mum, and she's super sweet"

"She has a soft spot for you," he laughs while his eyes roam my body as I strip down to my underwear.

I climb into bed next to him, "What did you and your Dad get up to?" he pulls me towards him.

"Dad took me golfing, which reminds me. Mum has her book club tomorrow night and Dad has a darts night, so we have the house to ourselves" Charlie starts kicking, he hates it when I lay on my side.

I run my hand over my bump "Come on Charlie, Mumma just wants to cuddle up to your Daddy" I roll onto my back.

Adam's hand runs over my bump, his lips follow "Hey, You go easy on mummy" he whispers before laying back next to me "So this morning it wasn't very nice to tease" his hand circles my bump as he is laid on his side.

I smirk "It wasn't very nice to trick me at the pub either"

He kisses my nose "Well, you have started something now I'll finish it" He runs his fingers under and along the waistband of my underwear his touch is electrifying, I try to control my breathing.

His lips brush along my pulse line (Fuck! Do not let him win!) His hand slips into my underwear "I'm not going to make love to you Ellie" He parts my folds (God!) I bite my lip trying not to act bothered, he nips my collarbone.

His fingers enter me, I take another deep breath "So, who won at golf?" I try to change the subject.

I feel him smirk against my neck "We drew but right now I want to focus on making you come"

I laugh, "Adam!"

He speeds up his pace, I roll onto my side now Charlie has calmed down and I slip my hand into his boxers. I grasp him, work my hand along his hard shaft as my lips crash against his.

"My plan hasn't worked, I...oh god fuck..I was supposed to tease you and leave you wanting more...but..." his tongue tangles with mine.

I smile against his lips "But what?"

I speed up my pace "God...Ellie,"

I'm getting to him, "Come on Adam! I thought you were going to tease me?" I grasp his lip between my teeth.

He groans, "We've got to be quiet, baby, I don't want your parent to hear us" I pull his lips to mine again.

Both our paces speed up, we can't get enough of each other "Ellie come for me, so I can make love to you!"

"Not until you do!" I whisper against his lip.

He kisses me harder, firmer "I love you Ellie"

"Guess what?"

"God..what?"

I smile, "I love you too more than anything!" I can't hold back any longer "Yes, Adam Yes!!" I fall over the edge, and he hits his climax right after"Fuck baby!"

He pulls off his boxers and I help him remove my underwear as his body cover mine, he pushes pass my entrance.

"OH!! God..that's it! Yes!! Adam Fuck me!" my back arches of the bed I grip him tighter.

He grasps the head board, thrusting harder into me "Ellie, this is all I've been thinking about all day!"

"I have a secret for you...oh"

His lips move against my neck "Secret?"

"Uh huh, this is....all I've.....been thinking about all day too" his lips crash to mine.

He grasps my hips, moves faster against them "Oh god...I'm gonna..Ohhhhh" I hit my climax again.

"Yes, that it Ellie. God...Yes! Ellie!" We're both catching our breath he collapses onto the bed next to me.

"So, how did teasing me work out for you Adam?" I wink.

"Don't worry beautiful I'll get you back!"

I laugh, "We better clean up!"

I get off the bed and hold out my hand "Wanna join me in the shower handsome?"

"Depends on what you're asking?" he give me that grin.

"I'm asking you if you want to add extra steam to the shower?" I bite my lip knowing what this does to him. Adam jumps off the bed picks me up in a bridal carry and leads us to the bathroom.

~*~*~*~

The next evening his parent are out Adam has ushered me upstairs to get dressed up, he's cooking.

"Are you ready beautiful?" He calls up to me.

"I'm just finishing up now" I spray myself with perfume and make my way downstairs. It's smells amazing and beautiful every counter in the dining room is covered with tealight, lighting up the room.

"Wow this is gorgeous, Adam!"

He smiles "Glad you think so! I'll grab you a drink. Take a seat" I sit at the dining table and wait for him to come back.

"Apple juice for my gorgeous wife," he hands me the glass and pecks my lips "Right, have fun. I am shattered. I'll see you in the morning" he turns and walks out the room.

"Wait? What? Adam?" I heard his footsteps head up the stairs. (He's joking right?) I sit there confused for a couple of minutes, I pull out my phone and look for the nearest restaurant.

I grab my keys and bag, just as I'm making my way to the door I hear, him coming down the stairs "Ellie, where are you going?"

"I'm going out for dinner as I thought we were having dinner here together, but I guess not," I try not to act bothered but the tone of my voice gives me away.

He gives me that smile and chuckles as he wraps his arms around me "I was messing with you, I was getting you back for yesterday, did you really think I went to all this effort to let it go to waste?"

"WHAT!? You thought that was funny?" I spit back at him before I pull away from him and walk out of the house and towards the car.

"Ellie, wait I'm sorry it was just a joke!"

He gently grabs my arm and spins me round to see the massive smile on my face "Gotcha!" I stick my tongue out at him.

"Now that was evil! I thought I had really upset you!"

I laugh, "No, but now you have to come up with something better than what you had planned"

He grins, "I just dug my own grave didn't I?"

"Well, that will teach you for playing a prank on me won't it! So, get thinking Mister!"

He kisses my nose "I think I have just the perfect idea grab a coat and blanket. I'm going to grab the food and a few other bits"

"Where are we going?" I call after him.

"It's a surprise" he throws me a smirk.

A few minutes later we are in the car, Adam is driving "You know your Mum made her own playlist yesterday. There was a song that kinda reminds me of us and everything we've been through lately"

"Oh, what song is that?"

I laugh, "She actually heard it in one of the Fifty shades films she watched with your Nan!"

His face turns to disgust "Thanks for that! I didn't really want to know they had seen those films"

"Come on, Adam every woman has seen it or read the books"

He looks over to me for a second "What about you? Have you watched or read them?"

I laugh, "Yeah, I read book one but skipped two and three. But I have seen all three films, I can't remember if it were the second or third film me and my friend Gemma got kicked out of the cinema for laughing and talking the whole way through!"

"You got kicked out of the cinema?"

"Yeah, there was this moody woman in front of us we were talking she kept shushing us. I think the finale straw was when he'd put Anna legs in this spreader bar on this bed then he flipped her from her back onto her front or the other way round. Gemma snorted and said if her husband John did that to her, she'd end up peeing herself especially after having her two kids. We were both howling. After that we were asked to leave"

He laughs, "I can say I've never been kicked out of a cinema! What was this song anyway?"

"I'll play it, hang on a second" I scroll through my recent playlist Sia - Helium press play.

His face lights up at the chorus "So, I'm your helium?"

I smile, "Yes, I think it would be prefect for our first dance song. What do you think?"

"I love it! It's perfect. My sassenach! We're here"

I look out of the window "Where are we?"

"Blackford Hill, we need to walk just 2 minutes that way. The view is stunning"

We finally got to the top "Wow, Adam this is beautiful!"

"I know, it's stunning isn't it?" He places a picnic blanket on the grass with a couple of cushions "Dinner with a view. Am I forgiven now?" we both take a seat.

I roll my eyes, "I suppose. but it depends on what you've made for dinner?"

"Well, you will definitely forgive me if it depends on dinner," he reaches over to thermal bag and pulls out a little tub as soon as he pulls off the lid I know what it is "I've never seen someone face light up so much over a beef hotpot!"

"Oh my god! Wait, so our romantic meal you got your mum to cook?"

He chuckles "Actually I make this, and she taught me how. I have the recipe so if it tastes exactly the same I can make it at home for you. So, try it"

I try a forkful (It tastes exactly like Ninas maybe even better) "Oh, wow... this is awful!"

His smile drops "Is it?" he takes the fork out of my hand and tries it "Ellie, you're mean"

I smirk "OK I lied. It tastes exactly like it if not better but you can't tell your mum I said that" we laugh.

After dinner we are laid back on the grass looking up at the stars, "You do know I will get you back for earlier!"

I hear a soft laugh escape from his lips as pulls me tighter against him "But for tonight we can call it a truce?"

"I suppose so! But watch your back!"

"Hey, have you see anyone walk pass since we got here?"

"No, why?"

"Good!" Before I can ask him what he means, he pulls the blanket completely over us, his body covers mine as he captures my lips.

"Adam! We can't! Not here! Someone might see us" I giggle.

"We better be quick then!" I can't deny him.

Later we get back to his parents "Looks like they aren't back yet!" He picks me up and walks us into the kitchen and places me down on the counter.

"Down boy! I draw the line at doing that in your parents' kitchen! What's the time?"

He pulls out his phone "I have a voicemail" puts it to his ear, his face drops.

"Adam, what's wrong?"

It's changed from shock to anger the phone is still against his ear "Adam, you're scaring me what's wrong?"

Continue reading this story here - Chapter 10.

@lem-20 @aussieez @khoicesbyk @txemrn @shewillreadyou @irisofpurple

#adam #adam x ellie #manchester

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allforhader · 4 years

Text

Dream a Little Dream of Me

Bill Hader x (F) Reader

Requested By: @designersophisticate

Warnings: Langauge

[ e/c : eye color]

Having those second thoughts after years of a commitment you thought was going to last until you’re buried six feet under...yeah. As much as that is dark. I never thought I’d feel this way about someone again.

“Hey, Y/N did you see that TMZ article?”

“Kristen the fact that you’re saying TMZ, I’m already disinterested”

“Well yeah. But if it’s about you, shouldn’t you read it?”

“What’s so interesting about my life that’s got TMZ all over it?” Y/N laughs at the thought because besides being a married successful actor, what interesting thing can they get?

“As much as TMZ isn’t the best source the fans should look at, this stuff can still hurt actors” Kristen states showing Y/N the article off her phone.

Y/F/N Y/L/N seen with Bill Hader without their significant others—Is there something there?

Y/N gave it a neutral look before handing Kristen her phone back. “Textbook rumor, hell. It was probably a teen that wrote that”

“Are you going to tell Bill or have him find out himself?”

“Knowing him and media, I’m gonna have to tell him” Y/N laughs before pulling up the article on her phone and sending it to Bill.

Bill: Wow. Haha, that’s a textbook rumor

Y/N: Thats what I told Kristen lol

Bill: So...You’re already in New York for SNL Saturday right?

Y/N: Right?

Bill: You want to grab drinks? Night before of course

Before Y/N can say anything more she stops herself from replying when her husband texted her. A smile formed on her face loving that he did but there’s so much more to it...

Evan: Hey baby!

Evan: Hope New York ain’t that humid like it is here. Honestly if it weren’t for our careers, we would totally be in a colder state. Can’t stand the heat

Evan: but yknow. LA is home lol

Evan: Speaking of LA, TMZ made a ridiculous article lmao. If I didn’t know already that you and Bill are just friends, I’d be worried. But again...It’s TMZ

Evan: Anyway! I love you

Y/N: I love you too

Bill frowns seeing she hasn’t responded and feels like he’s come on a little strong when...it’s just drinks.

“Hey, you gotta get going or you’ll miss your flight” Maggie smiles handing Bill his coat before he left.

He of course kisses his wife goodbye, but the lingering feeling in his chest grew.

When Bill was in the air he decided to shoot a text to Y/N indicating that he invited their friends but Y/N didn’t receive it. Reception and everything. But—

Y/N: I’d love to

was sent before Bill’s when his plane landed and he didn’t realize until it sent.

Bill: I invited Kate, Kenan, Fred, and Kristen...John is a maybe and Seth isn’t going to be in town.

“Shit. Should’ve—-fuck” Bill frowns waiting in baggage claim when Fred scared the man out of the blue. Even if Bill did know he was his ride.

Y/N sat in her hotel room staring at the text for a minute before checking the time and suddenly getting a semi crazy idea.

Y/N: You told me the other day you got a late flight...wondering if you want to order in some room service at my hotel room. If you’re not tired

Bill: Fred picked me up from the airport if you don’t mind him tagging along

Y/N: More the merrier :)

More the merrier...

After arrival and ordering in, Fred and Bill had already started to argued with each other about true crimes as Y/N sat back watching the two go back and forth. She laughs as she drinks her wine.

“So does it always end with her snapping?”

“No but when she snaps-“

“She snaps”

“Okay” Y/N laughs setting down her glass as Bill couldn’t help but smile enjoying her laugh.

“Well. I’m gonna get some sleep. I’ll see you two tomorrow” Fred got up giving Bill a look before leaving the two alone.

“Damn and I was just starting to enjoy your talk about true crime. I’m more into medical dramas”

“Like Grey’s?”

“Oh definitely Grey’s” Y/N smiles laughing as Bill moves himself beside her on the bed leaning against the headboard. “Did you even start it when I recommended it to you?”

“Okay I got up to season...eight and that is a shitton of Drama for me to handle”

“And yet you watch Snapped like it’s something you can’t live without”

“Ok ok...Snapped. Is the greatest show that I don’t even have a valid reason to explain why I like it so much.” Bill states looking over at Y/N as he...found himself lost in a thought.

Can’t really say the thought hasn’t crossed my mind. What if my life would’ve been different if I met Y/N before I got married? It clearly would’ve been different but would life have gone the same route as it is now...I’m lucky. Fuck. Lucky she’s in my life as it is...just

Friday rehearsals went by fast, Bill got a kick out of watching Y/N take off the liquid latex off her eyebrows. He laughs as he hands her the makeup wipes to get off the residue. Y/N rolls her eyes flicking Bill in the forehead for laughing at her.

“Y/N, John is looking for you. Wants to run lines again” Fred smiles watching Y/N clean up a bit before going to find John.

“Didn’t John leave before the rest of us?”

“Yeah but I wanted a minute to ask you”

“Ask me what?”

“I don’t know. Guess I’m stalling” Fred wasn’t stalling, he honestly wanted to be nosey asking if anything more happened when he was gone. He didn’t think exactly that. But the thought did cross his mind. “Uh. So about drinks tonight. That’s still down?”

“You really has to ask without Y/N present? Yeah it’s still down” Bill laughs patting Fred’s back before grabbing his things.

Soon the gang was hitting the bar late and really just enjoying each other’s time. Fred handed Kristen and Y/N their drinks as Kenan handed Kate and Bill theirs.

“You owe new a game of darts Fred”

“You are so on” Fred laughs at Kenan as he immediately got up from the booth.

“So Y/N, how’s your life in LA?” Kate smiles. “I have a role down there and wanted to know if there’s anything worth it”

“Well if you’ve in LA as long as I have, it’s pretty much worth seeing everything. When you have the time of course” Y/N smiles taking a sip of her wine catching Bill’s gaze on her which instantly made him look away.

“None of us have been in LA as long as you have. Literally. The phrase that “no one is from LA” is true when it comes to you” Kristen smiles watching Y/N shrug. “What’s stopping you from leaving?”

“Yeah, and don’t say career. Because you can easily live here and become a full on regular for SNL. Also get a few gigs here” Kate states as Y/N rolls her eyes smiling.

“I would do anything to get out of LA...but yknow. My husband is the reason.”

“God I hate that” Bill says out of the blue catching all three of them staring at him as he quickly downs his scotch. “Um. Y’know. If they really love and support you. You can do anything. But if they don’t...”

“They aren’t the one for yeah” John cuts in sliding into the booth beside Y/N. “Sorry for coming late. Had to get a few last minute ideas run by Lorne”

“You’re all good. But Kenan and Fred have beat you to the dart board”

“Shit. I call winner, re-fills?” John asks catching a nod from everyone but Y/N. “Want a new drink or?”

“Or...I’m gonna walk back to my hotel. Not feeling that great”

“Already? Damn...well at least get drinks with me when I’m in LA?”

“Of course Kate, see you guys tomorrow” Y/N smiles grabbing her coat and leaving the booth.

Bill watches her go giving John a look as he shrugs pointing with his eyes. He immediately got up going to catch up with her. She wasn’t far...but he hesitated for a second.

“They aren’t the one for yeah” Thanks John. I’ll be thinking about that for the rest of my life. Or well...the rest of my marriage.

Y/N froze when she heard fast movement behind her indicating the short run Bill made. She looks at him confused as he gave her a concerned look.

“We...are in the same hotel. Want to walk with me?”

“Yeah..I do” Bill states catching a very light tint of pink growing on Y/N’s cheeks as she quickly looked away. “Um. Are you only leaving because of what I said?” he asks as they started walking side by side.

Yes. Because...well what am I supposed to say to you? I can’t live to you. You’re one of my best friends. Someone I can be honest with. But you...make my mind go blank for a good minute. Forgetting that I’m married. Married to someone I’m just trying to make it work with at this point...I love Evan don’t get me wrong...but god what would I do—

“Uh. Can I lie saying it didn’t bug me?”

“So it bugged you”

“Little bit”

“I’m sorry” Bill frowns wishing he didn’t say it at all or let his emotions be a factor in it all.

“Be honest with me?”

“Always”

“Are you and Maggie okay? Because there....um. Must’ve been more to it personally than the obvious” But what’s the obvious? That I’m in love with you? Shit.

“Well, she loves me. I love her. But...the feeling is mutual. We haven’t talked about it entirely but when...the spark dies. It dies” Bill said bluntly making Y/N think too hard about what he just said. She didn’t want to feel bad, a part of her felt differently. “We really just yknow what to get everything in order before officially”

“Yeah no...I get it. Well. Yeah I do. I get it” Y/N frowns before flinching to the sudden boom.

Bill looks at Y/N freak a tad to the boom which was the sound of thunder. It’s not New York without one day of rain. Let alone lightening. He instantly wraps his arm around her out of instinct directing her under an awning.

“Should’ve...taken a cab”

“Mm. We can make it. If you trust me out in the rain”

“If we get electrocuted. It’s God hating me” Fuck.

I trust him.

I know she trusts me.

He wouldn’t have said that...if there wasn’t something.

She doesn’t like talking about Evan. Could there...

There’s something else

Fuck. Be true.

I’m...Ive been....

After all these years...I can’t just call her a friend.

“Fuck. Even in a jacket I’m soaking....fuck” Y/N was shaking but not because of the rain. Being afraid of thunder is a completely different story that she didn’t have the time to explain, when her mind is wondering.

“Come on...you should get out of the wet clothes” Bill says as he rests his hand on her cheek catching her gaze. Her beautiful e/c eyes looking up at him catching a whole other feeling.

After getting out of her wet clothes, Y/N opens her hotel room door looking up at a very distressed Bill. She frowns letting him in and once the door closed, he turned back to her taking her face into his hands kissing her.

I shouldn’t have done that.

...mutual

Fuck

Y/N shortly after pushed Bill off giving him a worried look before suddenly laughing and breaking down into tears. I’m sorry.

“Y/N—“

“I-...God. You have no idea Bill Hader. No fucking idea”

“What do you mean?” Bill frowns trying to comfort her but Y/N retracted herself.

“I feel so out of place here. Like. God. You drive me insane! And I don’t mean in a negative way. It’s never in a negative way. I’m just—-terrified!” Y/N laughs as she choked up on her tears. “I’m...I’ve been in love with you ever since we got close. But I’m married—you’re married—-and adultery is a fucking....sin? Hell I’m not religious but it is! Like Bill don’t get me wrong” She states resting her hands on his chest looking up at him as he continued to have a worried look. “I...I want to be with you. But I can’t...can’t do that to Evan.”

Bill watches her continue to cry as he takes in a deep breath before exhaling and resting his hands on her cheeks making her look at her. “It’s terrifying...falling in love again...especially to someone who has already locked that down. You’re...not alone in that boat. And I....I don’t want to give you an ultimatum or whatever the right word is called but...”

But?

“I’m willing to wait until the end of my lifetime to be with you. I know the next chapter in my life and my wife is on the same page. But the one after that...I’m willing to wait forever if I have to. If it means being with you. I’m not going to force you Y/N. You mean the world to me, but I don’t want to hurt you for eternity by forcing you”

And that’s that. He said that and Y/N took it to heart. Knowing exactly the next thing she does.

Is her choice.

The two haven’t seen each other in six months the after that SNL night, let alone talk to each other. Bill got a divorce, and he has set time for himself until he got a role at the end of that six month period heading straight for New York. Pretty common place for movies to be shot but he didn’t want to go anywhere crazy at that moment. Stepping onto set first day meeting the people you’ll be working with for months wasn’t a hard thing to do, but being handed a physical script that has the character list within it. Bill took his seat at the table read opening the script and reading-

“Hey Hader” Y/N smiles sitting beside him setting down her copy of the script and her tea. “It’s been a while”

“It has...you cut your hair” Bill smiles admiring the new look of hers. Y/N shot him a smile before elbowing him.

“Working out for Barry still Huh?” Y/N smiles catching a laugh as Bill nods crossing his arms. “You’re perfect no matter what. Y’know that right?”

“I do, do you?”

“Of course” Y/N smiles as the two straighten up when it got time for the actual read.

Afterward...

“You have a ride?”

“Rental”

“Oh shit. Hold on. Did you pay for a hotel room yet?” Y/N asks confusing the fuck out of Bill as she laughs at the confused look. “Just answer it Bill”

“Not yet. I just got in to be honest”

“Stay with me then” Y/N smiles. “I live in a loft on 408 Greenwich Street...it’s not that far and I have plenty of room”

“Lead the way?” Bill tosses her his keys as Y/N smiles nodding.

She’s...still the same happy girl when he first met her. Even if they both been through a lot the past six months. A lot has changed but the one thing Bill worried about...hasn’t changed. Because she doesn’t want their relationship to change until...then

Bill looks out into the street from her loft’s window. It’s not that bad of a neighborhood. Makes him wonder if it’s ever crazy loud at night or if it’s safe. He wants her to be safe.

“So, how long have you been here?”

“Uh. A month. But I put a down payment two months ago. It’s nice right? Not too big. Not too small. Just right...” Y/N smiles walking over standing beside him. “How are you? How’s everything in LA?”

“I’m good. Everything is good” Bill smiles. “And you? Evan?”

“Well, the decision wasn’t mutual. But it brought more things to light. So...Yknow. It was a matter of time” Y/N shrugs. “But hey. We are finalizing it. He’s still in LA and I’m here. Kinda...starting over. Turning a new leaf” she laughs at how that can sound but he understood. He understood completely.

“So, I know...the wound is still fresh. But baby steps huh?”

“Yeah” Y/N smiles taking his hand into hers feeling him gently squeeze. “Baby steps”

#bill hader #bill hader gifs #bill hader x reader #sorry it took a while lol

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