some of my favorite reviews of lmm's new little mermaid scuttlebutt song

Hua Cheng is just so iconic to us because he is in fact a tumblr girlie. Notebook filled to the brim with sketches of his blorbo. Info dumps galore. Maximalist fashion to the nines. Outfits based on accessories. Has all of the genders under one big shapeshifting trench coat. Hates the ruling class. Excuses every problematic thing his blorbo does and stands by them in the group chats. Insane reaction to people who dislike his blorbo and says mean things about them, burning temples is the doxxing of his time. He belongs on here with us.

theyre on the moon

thinking about how louis and lestat used to sit on their bench and just talk for hours…like they really were friends on top of it all….they really did like each other

does it count as a criminal record if his only crime is having way more fun than the navy allows? (insp).

asoue text posts (part 2 is up check the tag)

I think I've already said this once before but I really wish there was a feature in Wizard101 where important events, lore, and dialogue in the game were documented somewhere so we can view them whenever we want. like unless we video record the events while it happens, take pictures, or just go through the whole entire fucking plot with another wizard character there's no way to ever revisit those moments and that SUCKS??????? like wizard101 has some of the best lore ive ever seen and I don't wanna have to level up my wizard all the way to level 100 just to see that iconic grandfather spider scene or grind through azteca just to find that one epic fourth wall breaking moment 💀 i want to revisit all the incredible and funny and weird shit we've all gone through Immediately. Like damn remodel the library so that it actually keeps records and dated films of the things we've gone through so it can actually be useful instead of it being Just A Building (rants about this for so long that even Jesus smacks His lips)

Something very unfortunate, but my enthusiasm for columbo has made my friend, for some reason, not like him! How can they not like him? D: He's just a little guy!

honestly? i totally understand. and i run this blog.

columbo is likeable because we always see his best qualities. he does valiant work at a noble job. he's strong, he's intelligent; he's kind, he's just. he makes the right deductions and then makes sure he's right before acting upon them. he's played by peter falk. so yeah, most people want to kick back and have a beer with columbo, even (especially?) some of the people he puts in handcuffs.

but for a second, wash columbo of his charm, kindness, and intellect: the man is an evil fucking bastard. he is naturally annoying--one of his superpowers, which he knows and exploits. he is calculating, devious, manipulative. his overly polite, ingratiating manner wears very thin very quickly, doubly so if he's choosing to play especially dumb. he's a sadistic, disgusting, deceptive little troll who drops by unannounced and practically forces his way into your house, occupying it when it seems like he doesn't even need to be there, flaunting his authority. on top of it all he insists on billowing that cheap, stinking cigar smoke in your face, dropping ashes everywhere while smiling so smugly, so condescendingly, that you want to wring his little neck, his mumbling voice dripping with feigned apology all the while. he asks if you can use your phone, but not really, because he's actually telling you he's using it as he picks it up and makes a call before you can even open your mouth.

through it all, he outright implies that you or someone you love is a homicidal maniac.

then he fucking breaks your television. suddenly, mrs. peck becomes very sympathetic

now i'll ask you to imagine that, on top of all the aforementioned, columbo was, even once, wrong about who the killer was. i am asking you to sit there and imagine the most endearing waterboarding session you can. imagine subjecting an innocent human being to a punishment so cruel and unusual. imagine, as peter falk himself described, that a bunch of little ducks are nibbling at you, pecking at you in a hellish, promethean bid to get you to finally scream to the heavens in confession for your crime.

columbo is eminently lovable, but that love hinges entirely on the fact that he's always right. because if he isn't, he's worse than merely annoying--he's evil.

pot kettle

"If one of my posts starts getting too popular I delete the original so the notes don't clutter up my notifications and activity."

Did you know you can mute that?

Anyway, mask up 😷, I've gone viral (Half joking)

feeling like this right about now

thinking about when shen qingqiu said "why did women's fiction have an achievement like "good enough for a jerk off"? what were they jerking off?!"

ohh girl. you will know.

Okay, but HSMTMTS was insane for having Gina look at Ricky as he enters the room when Ashlyn sings “Is this home?” And then having both Ricky and Gina on frame for: “I am here for a day or forever? Shut away from the world until who knows when. Oh but then, as my life has been altered once, it can change again. Build higher walls around me. Change every lock and key. Nothing lasts, nothing holds all of me.” and then “My heart’s far, far away…” as Ricky walks out of the door and out of frame. Like, this was insane cinematography and foreshadowing.

And people doubting Ricky and Gina wouldn’t be endgame is insane because this level of effort isn’t put on non-endgame ships. They didn’t need Ricky in that scene, they just did it so they could mirror the lyrics with them and their constant theme of change and basically tells us that Ricky is Gina’s home and heart.

can you imagine being a little twee simon and garfunkel fan in the late 60s and then buying your new vinyl at the record store and hearing mrs. robinson for the first time in your own home. i would’ve fallen over backwards

“The day i die for you, that day is my eid.”

— Rumi