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lunarifie · 2 years

Text

Rewatching Ninjago

(With no context other than the episode)

Possession 3-4

The fact that Kais afraid of water while his sister is the elemental master of water is hilarious to me

Stiix is actually such a fascinating place in itself

Ninjago is legitimately good at world building Ill give it that

Why are they talking to this ronin guy as if he's an old enemy I have never seen him before

Ronin (talking about money): two hundred

Cole: what if we told you all of ninjago depended on the scroll of spinjitzu

Ronin: Well that changes everything!

Ronin: Four hundred.

Hes so funny but wiki says he sold Zane to chen so im a bit on the edge. He’s gonna have to do something redeeming for me to like him

Nyas training!!!!

I kinda like Wus depiction of water

Omg i remember finding it so cool and majestic when Wu summoned his dragon

Nya: you never told us you could do that

Wu: A sensei never tells.

Me (looks back at all the episodes I just watched): Obviously.

Wonder if Nya ever wanted to be the water ninja

If Wu KNEW that the ghosts were defeated by water why didnt he tell the ninja.

Cole, Jay, and Kai working as Zanes their cheerleader is so funny to me

Jay: his voice is on the fritz, i can fix it but it’ll take some time.

I miss techy Jay

Why is everyone except Cole being leader. Wasnt Cole originally the leader-like person in the team?

Jay: I say we dont need the scroll… because we’re gonna steal it. 😈

Ik i said this in my last post but

Jay, have. You. Been. To. Jail.

Nickname 1: mush mouth (zane)

Ik Lloyds fighting Morros possession but i wonder HOW

is it like a mental battle or is he pulling at the chains that restrain him in his mind

Either way thats traumatic

Nyas character has such depth that I wanna write a paragraph on her.

Her weakness being ‘feeling weak’

I just love her character sm

Her angers not misplaced though, if I was told I had to stop doing what im good at, and start doing something that im having difficulty with from scratch. To save my friends nonetheless.

I would go insane

They go so in-depth with Nyas character and symbolism in this episode that I cant help but appreciate it

Jay, (looking intently at the vase where the scroll is hidden in): ….

Jay (picks up the vase and looks under it): leave no stone unturned.

Hes such an idiot

Its so funny that morro waited, assuming the ninja would find the scroll for him and then just jumped out and fought them bc he didnt bet on their incompetence 💀

Okay but WHY is ronin introduced as such a ‘familiar’ character. Like his ship for example. Why are we acting like weve seen it before whats going on.

Why did Jay fall through the same womans roof twice 😭

Omgggg the same thing that happened to Lloyd where ‘everyone stays behind due to some circumstances leaving one character to fight by himself’ is happening to Kai!

Ronins such a dick

He was gonna leave Kai to DIE unless he paid up thats so shitty

Oh riiiight. Ronin starts working at steep wisdom. Forgot about that.

...

Ik yangs temple and ik exactly what's gonna happen

Coles in charge :D

Why didn't they just enter Yangs temple in the daytime? I mean thatd be a long time until sunrise, so no one turns into a ghost!

Jay and Cole (trying to break open the wooden boards on the window)

Zane and Kai (opens the front door.)

Jay and Cole: 😮

Fhjebtjdbrjsbf

Cole: didnt you hear! We have to leave before sunrise unless we turn into ghosts! God i hate ghosts. They’re terrifying.

Why did it have to be Cole 😭 it couldnt have been any other ninja

Jay loving ghost stories/true crime and getting excited over it while Coles hates it is a dynamic i need in my life

okay yeah the ninja are being mean by pranking Cole like that, but theyre right his scream was really funny 💀

Gonna do that drawing trend and draw the ninja in the haunted house poses

You know what im talking about.

Why does yangs flying swords look exactly like Kais golden weapon

(Swords and knives flying in all directions)

Jay: does this mean he wont teach us airjitzu 😀

Cole: ow my ear!

What ear.

God i wish the best for teenagers who broke into the haunted temple at night and had to experience THAT

Ronin: I dont knooow, wus my partner, i cant go behind his back.

Nya: (whips out a bag of coins)

Ronin: I can get you out of here tomorrow at noon.

Zane: EVERYONE. GET A HOLD OF YOURSELVES. EVEN IF MY VOICE WASNT STUCK. ID STILL BE YELLING AT THIS VOICE DECIBEL.

HFNSJFNSJR

(The temple starts flooding)

Cole: Why. Did you touch the scary painting JAY.

Jay: I didnt know it would do that COLE.

KAI LET GO OF THE DOOR YOURE GONNA DROWN

Ohhh so theyre facing their fears

Ok but how did Morro know about Nyas samurai cave can he see into Lloyds memories?

You really didnt think this through huh Nya, including the fact that Wu quite literally told you only water can stop the ghosts

Morro: BOO

he did the, he did the thing!!!!!!

At least she understands now :)

(The ninja tying each other by a rope so they cant lose each other)

Ah yes, this is brilliant, i do not foresee any consequences coming from these action.

Damn.

They really went straight to ‘the Morro fear/illusion’

I wanted to see Zane and Jays fears :(((

I need a fanfic asap where the ninja face their individual fears in yangs temple but its their fears on a deeper level. And they help each other out and stuff.

I dont wanna do a whole character analysis rn, but if someone else wants to write it tag meeee plsss

Yangs probably cackling as these fools stumble over each other

Zane: WHY DID WE TYE OURSELVES TOGETHER

YOU TELL ME.

This is it.

COLE SACRIFICED HIMSELF FOR THE SCROLL.

And it begins, his ghost arc.

#ninjago #lego ninjago #Rewatching Ninjago

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megismorallysunny · 8 months

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24/09/23

ok so i totally meant to do my hw but as i was getting to the last bit of my irish it just felt pointless, ive been feeling like that a lot lately, which is annoying cuz im always positive. i think i feel unliked by my best friends it kinda sucks but thats the way it is, ive been getting more snappy at them, so its kinda my fault so ill have to spend some more time near them and talk to them which feels hard because i just feel so pointless, life feels so pointless and for once not in the way of "yipee nothing matters" more like "nothing really matters so why try anyways".

so dark thoughts aside lifes been doing mediocre, i meant to say stuff so ill get a shit ton from my notes that i wanted to say said now. The spanish kid (who only joined this year to our school) is kind of annoying, idk if it was just me but when i added him on snapchat he asked who i was, which you know fine but he didnt ask my friend who also did that. anyways on tuesday(?) he sat in "apples" seat, she sits behind me, were friends now but we werent for six months. ill say in a later post. anyways the cabinet behind her has litter picker uppers because our maths teacher is the green schools advisor, anyways "spanish kid" we'll nickname him "4k4" decides to sit in apples seat bc it means hes kind of a little bit farther to the boys but he can go into the cabinet. also as soon as he joined he got immediantly accepted into the guy secret circle. anyways he pokes me once with the garbage picker upper, now let me preface this by saying im not a loner, i have no reason to be bullied and picked on except for being loud maybe, i always have too much optimism, i give compliments im nice, sometimes im dumb but not too dumb to make me unlikable. THERE IS NO REASONNN. but i got poked, and to be honest my feelings were a little hurt, all respect GONEE, so i got out a pen shell from my pencil case (yknow those bic pens where you can take out the inc and pen part, well basically the bit which was left was the pen shell). anyways i took it out just in case he poked me again... AND HE DID!?!? so i grabbed my pen shell and launched it into his face, it was rly funny cuz he wasnt looking and flinched rly badly and his friends started laughing.

another time was when i wanted to get into school i was going to go through the side entrance which can only be opened from the inside without a code, and 4k4 and some of his friends were there, and when i got there his main friend shut the door on me and laughed, i kinda stood there for a few minutes saying please, it was an old joke, and it was funny i was also laughing but 4k4 pointing at me and laughing in my face made me feel pretty shitty tbh.

anyways me and my friends had a mamma mia party 2 where we watched mamma mia 2, we had it on friday like last year and was held near a similar date (only a day off the original). it went ok, it felt weird, maybe i wasnt in a good headspace but i just felt lonely there.

i dont really want to talk about it much more besides that, i could just feel like shit because my period is soon but truthfully im just not sure. A german mayor came to our school maybe thats a bit revealing but whatever, for all you could know he could have come a month ago, thats how behind on my notes i am. some of this is OLD news. my old friend gave a speech to him, i liked my friend but then he asked this girl out, he got rejected and i felt like shit, it was clear to everyone i liked him and everyone knew and made jokes about it, i always blushed and i thought he might have actually liked me like that because he acted like it. i thought he had asked me on a date on wednesday, but i wasnt going to make it a date unless he told me it was. he mentioned something and said have you heard about me or something and i said "no what?" and i kept pushing but calmed down after three pushes and said no. when he left my friends told me he had rejected a girl the day before. i just felt like shit, complete and utter shit.

i completely erased my happy feelings of him, it semi worked i was better around him but i know that if he asked me out now then id say no. actually now that im thinking about it, maybe id explain how it made me feel earlier when he didnt like me and i felt bad and i know that hes going to feel bad too because i cant accept his feelings and im sorry, also 2 weeks after he asked out the first girl he asked out apple, she said no cuz she has a boyfriend, but like ive never been asked out before, why not me, what was wrong with me. it hurts sometimes but im over it.

im going to have to cut this short bc this is LONGG but apple said im really pretty in science which was a major upgrade from the week prior where she said i smelt, i wasnt too fazed by the insult but i was delighted by the compliment. yknow emerald, i mentioned him on thursday(?) but he won the student council elections, thank god it wasnt apricot i dont think i could have bared another year of having everyone trust him.. hes really not someone to be trusted.

ok so i have much more to say but i have to go sleep but i was watching foolishs pov of the qsmp event going on rn, and i need to watch the cellbit rpg but i just find that tabletop shit confusing and frankly the rpg thing confused me but i think i can wrap my head around it. as always good morning, good day and good night.

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dreaminginvelaris · 3 years

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I really don't understand how people can say Nesta didn't have to apologise

Like seriously????

And especially the thing about ic being shitty to Nesta like wtf?

Amren was good until she licked her ass and the moment she finally got tired of it she is hated

Mor tried and got slut shamed in return. How can anyone sympathize with people who show them the worst things they have suffered and finally overcame them

Azriel was always neutral never said anything to her

Rhys since the beginning, even though he didn't like her, never showed her any inclination of his dislike. In acomf, cassian says but Rhys kept his mouth shut, when nasty said she would slit his mate's throat he kept quite, when nasty slut shamed mor, he didn't call her out, when nesta changed her mind to attend the meeting he easily let her come and even gave her a nice proposal, when he said his pre war speech, he included both Elain and Nesta even though they didn't know them well, the entire acofas he had never showed any ill will for her except after she was brought to river house.

And especially the hate on feyre... goddddd!!!

Feyre should be patient, dude she left her alone for an entire year. The entire acowar she is trying to mend her relationship with Nesta and yet all she does is spit cruel words back at her. And the first time Feyre finally stood up for herself, not tolerating nesta's bull shit she is the bad characters. Like seriously???? In acofas she said "to say that to me: alright, but to say that to elain" like this line always hurts me. She has done everything to keep Nesta as luxuriously as possible and yet she is the bad person.

It was not the ic's duty to help Nesta even though feyre tried, elain tried, Cassian always pinned after her and u really can't expect mor to be all lovey dovey after she has seen how badly she treats her family.

Honestly, when they love Nesta for not taking anyone's bullshit, every other character would deserve the same. They really couldn't expect that ic would break their 5 centuries of friendship just because of her rude behaviour, even though in the end I think the only person who is completely loyal to Feyre is Mor.

first of all IM SO SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG TO ANSWER FORGIVE ME 😭😭😭

okay so i agree, claiming nesta didn't owe them an apology was absolute bullshit. claiming they all owed nesta an apology is even more pathetic.

nesta was absolutely horrible to them all when she first met them and the "they're fae thats why she doesnt like them" excuse is bullcrap. i understand being apprehensive, especially when you’re mortal and they're powerful as fuck, some wariness is literally expected. but when those same ppl prove over and over again that they will protect you and your beloved sister, whats with the attitude then? they never laid a finger on her, never spit cruel words to her the way she did with them. they fed and clothed and sheltered her; and her sister. at this point, nesta darling was just being a grade-A bitch bc she likes being cruel.

literally so many act like it was the IC who started the cruelness with nesta when thats so fucking false? legit rhysand cassian and azriel were all pretty fucking neutral in the beginning with nesta, even after knowing what nesta did to feyre. rhysand legit thanked them for their "hospitality", when nesta made feyre feel bad bc of fucking food, rhysand calmly explains why feyre cringed at the food (a reasonable fucking explanation btw) when nesta insults feyre, rhysand stays quiet, letting feyre be the one to stand up for herself.

even with cassian, like that mf didnt open his mouth until nesta was insulting feyre for no reason, which is the reason why he called her out on her sadistic bullshit. sorry but if i was cassian i would have done the same. maybe add in some colorful words and a bitch slap to the face.

the inner circle had no obligation to help nesta, and they only tried bc of feyre. but why would they want to be around someone who constantly makes her dislike of them obvious? idcthat nesta fought in the war, like okay so did a thousand others. and they all got reasonable compensations. they weren’t afforded the same luxury of being given money so they can drink and fuck themselves to death. why should nesta be given that privilege? oh right bc of feyre, bc everything she has is thanks to feyre.

i agree with mor, i mean shes legit watching this pos insult and hurt cassian who she loves and protects, and feyre, her newfound sister, friend, ofc shes gonna start being more protective and a bitch back. like yes queen !! honestly the ppl who cant realize why mor was being a bitch to nesta have me concerned bc like would you not protect your friends if someone like nesta was around? if not i feel sorry for their friends but not totally surprised.

#feyre archeron #pro feyre #pro morrigan #pro rhysand #cassian #azriel #amren #anti nesta

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keylimeimagines · 2 years

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hello!! i was wondering if i could have a genshin impact matchup? if not thats totally fine!! i hope you have a great day ahead!! :3 𝐈. 𝑨𝑷𝑷𝑬𝑨𝑹𝑨𝑵𝑪𝑬 + 𝑰𝑴𝑷𝑶𝑹𝑻𝑨𝑵𝑻 𝑺𝑻𝑼𝑭𝑭 (APPEARANCE + IMPORTANT STUFF) my name is sam!! i dont mind any pronouns but i prefer they/them a lot more! im pansexual (but have a strong leaning towards women but also men and sgshshahshhwhd everyones so hot)

im very fidgety and use a lot of hand gestures. with how much i play with my hair you'd think it wasnt tangled (spoiler alert: it is lol) , i also bite my nails a lot

𝐈𝐈. 𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑺𝑶𝑵𝑨𝑳𝑰𝑻𝒀 (PERSONALITY) im an intp-t and ambiverted!! my personality overall is sarcastic, funny (or at least i try to be-) , chaotic, talkative, moody, and i have a bit of anger issues, and some people describe me as a pushover :(

i have mood swings very frequently and im very very stubborn

i usually burst into song or have random bursts of energy at the worst times, and have a horrible sleep schedule

i also get distracted easily, have trouble remembering things, and have trouble with deadlines lmao

due to my horrible memory, i usually miss meals or forget important things like my laundry or cleaning my room. i always say ill make a list to check every morning, but i dont. (also a funny way i like to describe my horrible memory is that every time i wake up its like the morning after getting dr3n1k cause the night before is a total blur) i like a lot of things! but mainly drawing, flowers, watching movies, making jokes (theyre more sarcastic or sexual in a way- kind of like kenny mccormick or chandler bing-) , doing my eyeliner , games, skittles, dying and cutting my hair, styling outfits, painting, and talking with my friends!! i also like telling stories and making little songs in my free time!! i like greek mythology, making theories, and psychology! my hobbies are gaming, art (in general), making little theories, and singing! i would add dancing but im not very good at that lol 𝐈𝐈𝐈. 𝑳𝑶𝑽𝑬 𝑹𝑬𝑳𝑨𝑻𝑬𝑫 (love related) my primary love languages are words of affirmation and acts of service! 𝐈𝐕. 𝑺𝑪𝑯𝑶𝑶𝑳 𝑹𝑬𝑳𝑨𝑻𝑬𝑫 (school related) i try my best to get good grades in school, but i usually get a C or a B, maths and AP (araling panlipunan, its to learn filipino history) are the ones where i fail the most 𝐕. 𝑯𝑬𝑨𝑳𝑻𝑯 (HEALTH) i have a hard time taking care of myself and pass out a lot from lack of iron in my body (which i joke about a lot)

to add to this ^^ i also joke about bad things that happen to me which nobody laughs at except me if you need anything else pls lmk or dm me!!

also, im very sorry that was so long, i tried deleting some things that didnt seem very important. pls take your time with this!! you can ignore this or delete it if youre uncomfy with my request, thats totally fine with me!! :)

CELESTIA HAS SPOKEN, AND THE ONE CHOSEN FOR YOU IS...

GANYU [ISFJ]!!

ISFJ x INTP is one of my favorite MBTI pairings, so i hope this was a good match!

Ganyu is naturally more of a listener than a talker, so she'll be glad to listen to whatever is on your mind atm!!

She's VERY shy around you like "omg they're so pretty??" and she starts shutting down bc she's so attracted to you??

She's much gentler and passive than you, so you two contrast well imo <33 however, she is also very stubborn (at least, when it comes to work that is)

I'd hc her to also have a shitty sleep schedule due to overworking, so she can't help you much there :( she does try though! she offers that you two sleep together to ensure a better sleep schedule :))

Although she does skip or forget about meals, she does her best to remind you to eat once and a while (hypocrite [affectionate])! she helps you make a check list for things you might need to do, with reminders here and there

I'd think that she loves drawing as a hobby! She may not be that good, but she tries and that's all that matters <33 she would love to draw with you!

she also really likes flowers (despite her loving to eat qingxin flowers)! her dream is to have a garden that doesn't carry the burdens of work

OH and her face gets so red when you give her words of affirmation! despite it being one of her main love languages, she still can't help but get so flustered!

compliment and comfort her about her body and she'll love you forever <33 she isn't the biggest fan of herself, so she'd really appreciate it if you were to comfort her when she gets to her worst

she's very giving! maybe a little too much, but she'll be glad to help you with things to show her love!

she's also pretty bad at taking care of herself, but maybe you two can help each other when needed!

cocogoat gf is the best i love her <33

#ganyu #ganyu x reader #ganyu x you #genshin impact #x reader #f/o imagines #genshin impact x reader #headcanons #vee's headcanons #f/o #vee's imagines #💖love across teyvat💖(matchup series)

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semiconducting · 3 years

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just reflecting on some personal growth stuff from last year !

im actually. genuinely okay. like i think im starting this year feeling okay! which is atypical.

i think i can attribute it to the enormous amount of work id put into myself over the past year...i remember one year ago being extraordinarily depressed and really just. high strung? incredibly anxious but exhausted. and i fell down a descent slowly from not eating, to getting really irritable and not handling conflicts with friends well, to actively self harming again, to the point where i remembered sitting in a coffee shop with one of my friends and saying out loud that i need to go to therapy. and that i was going to talk to a mutual friend of ours about how the therapy services on campus are. which was a huge step for me! ive always had trust issues with therapy services since i was 12 for reasons i wont go into, but im sure you can gather the point of.

and then, literally the next day after saying that, got news about campus shutting down because of the virus.

and i made all of the effort possible to reach out to my friends and get things figured out to weather the storm because i KNEW shit was going to get bad if i didnt. but only one of my friends was really keeping up, and thats because he and i do homework together so we were already in a rhythm of talking every single week no matter what. and thats not to say that im ungrateful for him or the fact that even still he was there for me while i was going through hell, i have this thing about Not Putting All My Problems On And Confiding In One Person And One Person Only. so i withdrew, i stopped talking to everyone, i stopped logging into my classes, i didnt do any homework, i didnt lead my workshops, didnt hold office hours...i was just wallowing in my own misery

and i made plans to kill myself. and thats like, i mean i could say that several dozen times over the course of a year since i was like 12, but i mean a legitimate walkthrough plan. had my hiking bag packed with everything i was going to use, decided where i was going to, and was going to prep myself for it. wrote drafts and drafts of suicide notes until i decided just leaving the contact info of people who needed to know asap was all i was going to leave. in addition to sticky notes on some stuff in my room for what needed to be returned to who, or if something should go to someone in particular...

and i acted as normally as i could around my housemates. attributed my not leaving my room much to being busy with classes. i have a rule to myself to always sleep at least one night before killing myself because if im really serious about going through with it it can always wait one day. this time i decided i was going to clean my room and leave it as pristine as possible. the last thing i had to do was a load of laundry, and then i was going to do it.

and then someone from campus showed up at my door. because one of my professors filed a report and i hadnt responded to any of the emails id received checking in on me.

so i readjusted. caught up on my schoolwork, just barely finished the semester and definitely didnt do it strong or well (god bless the pass/fail option bc of covid LOL), but i did it nonetheless. went home, started my internship, had a miserably mundane summer.

i grew bitter and apathetic. i was angry at my friends for not being responsive when i reached out to them to talk or hang out or do anything. i got tired of dealing with it. i was tired of feeling alone and like no one gave a shit about me except for when it was convenient for them. i decided that i wasnt going to deal with people who werent willing to put any effort into me, so i stopped talking to everyone and kept up with people who were willing to reach out after the fact.

it’s definitely not the best approach. it’s really unforgiving and it doesn’t give people a lot of benefit of the doubt, but i think it was necessary in some respect. i didn’t have any criteria for how people needed to reach out, or how long after, or whatever, just that they did. really needed people in my life who are willing to communicate with me. i was honest with how i was feeling and why i did things if they did, apologized for the shitty approach, thanked them for still being willing to talk to me, and worked out the best way for both of us to keep things going.

over the months i dont think i really regret the decision, because it’s been a weight off my shoulders. i feel a lot better. i’m far more okay with where i stand in all of my friends’ lives, even if that’s not as a priority and even if that’s as just someone to talk to and catch up with like a couple times a year. it took a bit for it to pay off but it’s nice to take a look at people i was putting far too much work into and upon reflection realizing that they only interacted with me when they needed something from me, and not for me as a person. i think there are still people where there are loose ends and i think i may try reaching out myself to tie those up at some point, whenever i have the energy and clarity of mind for it. but i guess at the end of the day i just decided that people who weren’t willing to communicate weren’t worth the time. i’m okay if that communication means i need to be the one to initiate conversations even! i just need to know that.

but yeah. i came back to ny and started the semester totally apathetic and angry. i was so fucking depressed and bored with everything even if i was keeping myself incredibly busy. the only thing that i found rewarding (and what was just barely keeping me going) was leading my workshop for the intro optics class.

and then a friend -- the same friend i was at the coffee shop with -- reached out to catch up. and i was honestly really bitter and angry with him and was prepping myself to start listing out issues that i hadnt been able to address with him beforehand (side note, while telling friends the issues you have with them is important, listing shit out all at once is hardly ever a good approach especially without warning LOL) but ended up...just having a calming and comfortable conversation about what was going on in our lives since we last saw each other.

n later that day i ended up reaching out to an old friend that i had been meaning to catch up with because we fell out of contact, but had just barely been trying to start talking again in the months before this but had kept missing opportunities to properly converse. but we talked again, and we set up a day to hike and catch up.

and he comes to my house and picks me up. and i get in his car. and its like, holy shit, its been almost a year since ive seen you. and we hugged. and just started to catch each other up on the mess that had been our lives since we’d actively been in contact. we hiked, he told me about the books he wanted to write, we talked about people we knew, we talked about politics, we talked about school, we talked about life, and it was just as comfortable as if not a day had passed...even though it was obvious that he and i were both changed people over the past year. nothing about our friendship was any different though.

we resolved to hanging out with each other every week. decided we both needed the interaction, appreciated having each other around, and had a nice overlap of free time in the week that worked well. friday nights unless otherwise specified.

it was totally unexpected. he’d always been a great friend to me, but i never expected us to get as close as we did. neither did he. he’s probably the first person in my life (or at least in a very long time, and certainly the only person at the time) that i’d been so comfortable with that i practically had no boundaries around. none that needed to be addressed, anyway, because the only possible ones to throw up wouldn’t even come up (but of course, i constantly reassured that as soon as anything came up i would let him know because early on he kept asking sjhdkjfh).

he became something for me to look forward to in the week. towards the beginning he was a shoulder to lean on when i needed it and was willing to listen to things i hadn’t been able to tell anyone out loud. and he confided in me as well. it was comfortable. it was safe. it was a level of trust with vulnerability that i’d never shown anyone else.

but it wasnt even just that! it was fun! hes so fun. we could talk about everything and nothing, and hes one of the only people where i feel like i have to keep up with him in conversation instead of the other way around. we’d jump from topic to topic so much faster than either of us could think and it was all always so interesting. littered with humour that was just dumb and simple. i felt comfortable just being an idiot with him. i felt like i had nothing to prove.

for the past few years ive held to the sentiment that i like to hang around with people that make me a better person. but somehow, with him, its not that i felt like he made me a better person, but that he made me more myself. he saw who i was without any kind of fronts. and i always was afraid to show anyone that me because i always assumed that they would be depressing, loathsome, bitter, angry, and vicious.

but....i’m not. i learned that i’m incredibly loving. that i’d do fuckin anything to for my friends, but always in a way that was healthy and rewarding for both of us. i’m very light-hearted and my sense of humour is so stupid, but also very analytical and thoughtful. just a bit judgmental and pretentious, but always for things that people dont expect. totally open minded in discussions. an avid explorer, and a bit of a thrillseeker. and so, so, so affectionate.

i realized im. not as horrible as ive always made myself out to be. i accepted that i didnt need to punish myself for things beyond my control. i realized that i could believe people when they tell me that they enjoy my company, or appreciate things i do for them, or that they think i’m a worthwhile person to keep around.

its not that i dont have my flaws, its not that there arent things that i have to work on still. but maybe, at my core, i’m not actually motivated by spite, i’m not actually a hopeless pessimist, and that i’m not...broken. i’m not some secretly irredeemable monster.

and for a period of time i’ve been in a place where i could say i was genuinely...happy! and i don’t think i’ve ever been able to say that. i’ve certainly been made happy by doing things with friends in the past, i’ve been through periods where i’ve been okay with where i am at in life, but ever since i was like 12 (but probably even before that) i’d never been able to say that i was happy. it’s not that i wasn’t stressed, it’s not that things in my life were all going perfectly....but they didn’t define my mood. they didn’t define my view of myself. school, despite being the primary focus of my life, wasn’t dictating how i was feeling. even when things were agonizing and depressing because of school, i was still okay. i was incredibly stable.

and i owe that all to him being there for me. and hardly any of these things were anything that he was really directly responsible for, like its not that he sat there and just constantly showered me in reassurance and praise or anything that changed how i view myself...it was just having his company. it was just being able to sit there and listen to him go on about some totally random thing that he was exceptionally knowledgeable about. it was exploring caves and climbing hills. it was cooking together. it was talking about science. it was talking about love. it was talking about music. it was just having a consistent presence in my life, someone that treated me like a priority but never at the expense of himself, and someone i didn’t have to walk on any kind of eggshells around. it was someone who trusted me and respected me not by anything id done to warrant it, but just because of who i was.

it was a reminder that i can take care of my own problems, that i just need to be a good presence in someone’s life and for them to be a good presence in mine.

but also that i can accept help from people who genuinely want to offer it! and that that help doesnt always have to be direct. that sometimes helping me means i get to do something nice for someone else LOL

it was everything i ever needed and i wasnt even looking for it. he meant the world to me and i was so, so thankful for the circumstances that led us here because i was so happy to have him in my life again. i was happy that we were able to get closer because we’d only been able to interact in professional environments before.

and then i realized i was in love. and i had a sexuality crisis. but i didn’t recognize it until i fell hard because it was a different kind of love than i’ve felt for anyone before. it was intense but entirely too comfortable. but i knew that i cared about him, and that he cared about me, and that i really didn’t need anything about our friendship to change but that it had potential to be something even greater than it was.

and i resolved to tell him about it...until he told me first. and that moment was, as cheesey as it sounds, nothing less than magical. we were both so happy and giggly and it was so sweet and warm and i dont know if im ever going to be able to recreate that feeling because it was just so particular, so specific to being something between me and him. its not that i cant love anyone else as strongly or be as happy as i was necessarily, but it’ll never be that same kind of feeling.

but things happened. things got complicated. i think he panicked. and then things that happened just felt so dirty and hollow and dark. he hurt me really, really, really badly, and it managed to happen in the span of four days.

and i’ve spent the last <2 weeks dealing with it. i think he’s dealing with it in his own ways, but realistically i don’t know how because i havent seen him since christmas eve, and we were both definitely not being completely genuine that day. was at his house for a small family party and he and i were the only ones who knew what happened. it was too soon to have healed from it any, but we couldnt exactly be honest about it then either.

and im doing better. im genuinely okay now. and, interestingly, i think i owe it to the past few months of hanging out with him and how ive been able to come to terms with a lot of things about myself. ive been able to show myself compassion. its really ironic.

its a situation where i was desperately trying to throw blame onto myself for, because if i could then i could punish myself for it and use it to fuel that deep rooted self hatred and then i could fix it, because i’d be the one responsible for fixing it. but, and i’ve talked to quite a few friends about it trying to figure out who to confide in about it, everyone who knows about it insists that i cant blame myself for it. theres not a thing about the situation that i can blame myself for. and its so fucking weird, because i cant bring myself to fully blame him for it either, just because it was so ABSURDLY out of character that it doesnt feel like it was anything he could have done to me. it was a boundary that i wasnt ever supposed to worry about him crossing, because he’s just not that kind of person.

and it’s the type of situation that you’re supposed to totally be willing to cut someone off for but...i can’t. he’s genuinely remorseful and i think he doesn’t really know how to deal with it either. and despite it being a massive fuck up its still like...the first fuck up in our friendship from either of us. and i’m willing to see this through. i think it’s salvageable, even if it’ll never be the same as it was. i have faith in our friendship. i think we can make it work.

but no matter what happens. i owe him more than i’ll ever be able to repay him for. and i’ll never, ever be able to hate him because of that. i’m in a much, much better place because of him and for that i’ll always be thankful.

#shut up mega #this ended up being longer and more in depth abt the earlier half of the year than i meant it LOL #a summary of my 2020 i spose #also there's some kinda detailed talk of #suicide ment -#self harm ment -#IM CRYING AFTER WRITING THIS OUT LMAOOOO

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j4nn4s · 5 years

Text

rules:

always repost the rules

answer the questions given to you by the one who tagged you!

give 11 questions

tag 11 people

i was tagged by @isakvdhflorenzi, ty miss lorena <3 1. Is the social media presence of the characters important to how you view the quality of the remake/show?

hm well skam nl is my favorite and their social media game is trash LMAOOO so generally No but i do feel like remakes who DO have such a good presence kind of elevate the show and i think it’s pretty heartwarmin to see some remakes go sm farther than skam with social media and puttin out educational and IN CHARA resources like skames does this so well and i feel like in that way, the team is really really spreadin skam’s spirit via these resources (like joana’s billion bpd awareness ig accounts and lucas rubio’s yt channel)

2. Least favourite clip of the show? Why?

tbh there are definitely some duds but probably one of the clips with sana gettin herself into a hole in s4 just bc some were hard to watch cus cringey or yikes .... idk i cant think of others LMAO

3. Which character did you feel the most connected to and why?

ijeoiqjiwoij even tho even is my all time fave skam chara, i have to say isak for all of these reasons

4. Your least favourite part of every season?

season 1 - tbh even though i really enjoyed this season, it does take a while for it to build up like i rmr at first not being that interested until ep6 maybe ?? which is hard when you’re trying to get your friends to watch but they have to wait until ep6 before shit starts RLLY buildin up and gettin wild

season 2 - hm ig noora chasin after william ??

season 3 - bro NOTHINGGG call me a purist but its such a refined masterpiece like the pacing is good the characterization is so good ugh i deadass cant think of anythin

season 4 - i always felt a little ??? w noora being sana’s bff ig bc from s1-s3 it didn’t Feel like they were that close like even in noora’s pov, sana wasn’t really a part of it that much ?? like eva was more of noora’s bff ?? so i feel like it would have made more sense if maybe sana spoke more with chris or vilde bc sana and vilde eventually seemed to get closer esp with kosegruppa and chris has always been by sana’s side ?? idk that always confused me

5. What is your opinion on the cast’s participation on social media? Do you prefer it when the cast aren’t that involved like the Skam cast, or do you like a lot of content like the Fr cast do?

tbh i don’t care much abt the casts LMAOOO if anythin it kind of brings more harm as seen with the harassment axel and maxence get and also can bring more controversy like with irene (which honestly is p sad considerin how much i love skames bc now i feel super :/ watchin it like she shouldve just had private accts at this point)

6. Favourite song you found from Skam or the remakes?

OMFGGG love this question .... def doorman by slowthai and mura masa bc its one of my fave songs now and i got it from skam nl <3 ugh taste

7. If you could decide which characters from Skam got a season, who would you choose?

OOOHHH ugh torn bc i like isak’s pov but also i want even’s so might have to forfeit isak season for even season ....... hm so probs vilde, sana, even, noora (maybe not w william tho) and honestly maybe jonas too ??

8. Are there any moments that you liked in the show that everyone else seems to hate?

IJXDWQOIJJ yes .... remakes-wise, people hate skam nl s2’s last half but i enjoyed it for the most part ... i think the pacing was off for the last ep but personally, clip 50 made up for it and is p god tier imo ..... and also don’t think the first half of ep10 is enough to discredit the entire season bc i rlly loved seeing liv’s pov and have sm fave moments from the season

but skam wise, omg might get a lil controversial w this one IM SORRY !!! im bein honest and its Just my opinion ok

personally s2 got me more invested than s1 and i don’t think its a super bad season like i didnt really say many problems wrong with it until i got on tumblr wiejioqjoiqjq i was sort of interested in the questions that the noora/william dynamic brought up which is, as expressed in william’s war speech to noora, that nothing is ever black/white which i feel was a huge message and feeds into the ‘you never know what ppl are going through’ theme of the season ... like i like the idea of someone like noora, who can have a black/white mentality (as seen in the first clip of s2 when she tells vilde that they can’t have the tannin company as their sponsor bc they objectify women or smth but misses the context and what it could mean for the bus monetarily bc shes caught up in bein ‘woke’) having to break out of that and see more than one side ... and i think remakes like skam austin expanded on this idea well like when zoya was like ‘must be so nice being right all the time’ which i Do feel like is an important for youth to know today .... bc i think its so easy to get caught up in the idea of being so objectively right and morally superior that people lose sight of the more nuanced characteristics to life ... (omg long ramble BUT)

also LMAOOOOO this one might be more controversial as it pertains to bench scene s4 ok oops again doNT GOTTA AGREE !! ........ but i feel like the scene had a lot of good intentions ... i was def kind of cringing a bit tho bc i understand the subject’s sensitivity and how these topics are hard to talk about but i genuinely feel like they both made Some points and should listen to each other .... like as Hard and as maybe ‘unwoke’ it is to admit, unfortunately you sort of do have to answer the tough questions bc that way we learn from each other .... and i perfectly understand why some ppl wouldn’t want to do this and i certainly am tired abt havin to answer shit abt my sexuality or stupid male questions abt women but if u dont answer them, people do go lookin for answers still and the internet is such a shitty place that its pretty easy (esp with youtube’s algorithm) to lead you to ignorant ppl and perhaps radicalization .... questions help us to better understand our community and sometimes they can have good intentions too but we have to ask and answer them or else people will make up answers (which ive literally seen and its honestly worse to see fake as shit and UNINFORMED answers bc ppl did not want to ask you or ppl of ur identity, esp when they’re already startin from a place of hate .... but i rather have ppl ask me patronizing questions than have them spread false info bc that can do much more harm in the long run) however i DO think that isak should also consider sana’s side and i sort of wish we saw him conceding more bc they both have smth to learn from one another, like sana shouldn’t just be learnin from isak, isak needs to learn from sana too

PHEW SORRY QWIOJQWIO girl i just got opinions on some things this is when my desc rlly comes in handy .... oqjdwqioj

9. What did you learn from the show?

omg honestly too much to write here tbh ..... but if it says anythin im (very slowly) in the works of a three part skam essay about basically how skam teaches us to be better humans and how to better treat the people we care about diowjqioj essentially the three biggest themes of the show: you never know what someone is going through so always be kind, always communicate with your friends, and no person is ever alone and i feel like these are definitely rlly good messages to live by (also livet er nå BITCH !!!)

10. What is your favourite headcanon about your favourite characters?

omg tbh i could not tell u at all how the skam charas are doing except i hope even is okay thats all im thinkin of ok .... OIWXIOJX omg remakes wise tho ..... honestly im so bad at this girl IDK !!!!! LMAO i have to really think i have a bit of vdh and dutch even but thats bc we know like Zero abt them so its easier oijwiojqio idk liv and noah bein cute as shit ..... OH WAIT personally i feel like janna got a bunch of pansexual energy so my BIGGG hc is that she’s pan also bc she’s one of my all time fave charas and my fkn url so itd be dope if she was pan ok boom

11. What is your opinion on fanfiction in the fandom?

tbh i don’t read skam fanfiction but i don’t mind reading some from the remakes (tho still its rare) ... eiojeioqw i just don’t trust anyone but julie to write skam charas bc i think that’s how precious the show is to me LMAO like idk everything ive seen of skam fanfiction and ficlets and one shots, i could never get into bc the tone is just so out of character or there will be lines that just take me out of the fic bc im like this !!!! is not !!! how the chara acts !!!! so yeah idk not rlly a fan bc of my purist ass but i dont mind others reading it

Questions:

1. Favorite quote of the show?

2. Which country would you like to see have the next remake? Do you have any headcanons?

3. Which season would you rewrite and how would you rewrite it?

4. What clips do you personally like or don’t mind, but others hate?

5. Which songs do you think SKAM or the remakes should have included? For which moments?

6. Who would you give SKAM season five to and what topics and themes would it cover?

7. What moment spoke to you or touched you from SKAM the most?

8. How did you find SKAM? How did you feel about it right after watching?

9. Have you shared SKAM with any friends in real life? What did they think of it?

10. Of the remakes, which characters are your favorite of their SKAM counterparts? (Ex. who is the best Vilde remake? Eva? etc.)

11. How do you feel about the SKAM (and remakes) tumblr fandom?

I tag: @smileykeijser @whatadaze @queenofpurgatoryx @itlukey @skamyeets @shaykeijser @megeliz01 @isakcijser @wackpainterkid @axelauriantblot @kar-d-momme

(omg ik some of yall have been tagged so just ignore if u dont want to do it ok im srry it was in the RULES!)

#long post #skam opinions #tag meme

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mandaloriangf · 6 years

Text

reasons why detroit become human makes no goddamn fucking sense beyond just the shitty allegory (aka i nitpick the fuck out of this game)

captain allen refuses to give connor any information about daniel despite this being a hostage situation and connor is there to diffuse it

also allen says that if connor doesnt take care of it he will and if he could why didnt he??

connor can reconstruct crime scenes with so little information that theres no way he could come to his deduction. for example in the first chapter he figures out that the father was holding something when daniel shot him despite there being NO WAY he could know this

theres segregation despite the fact that androids are servants to humans??? how are androids supposed to work for humans if they’re barred from entering certain places??

TEMPORARY PARKING????????????

unemployment is at 35% yet the economy is booming????

unemployed people blame androids for stealing their jobs despite the fact that androids did not get a choice and were made to do certain jobs. their anger should be directed toward cyberlife

markus shows emotion and has a distinct personality before becoming deviant like why does he even need to become deviant when he clearly already is??

carl’s on the nose monologuing.

carl says lets see where we left off and when markus takes down the tarp theres a finished painting. carl makes like five strokes lol.

he also makes the same “oh my god” no matter what markus paints

PRESS X TO SADNESS

how does todd afford kara and alice when he doesnt have a job

and why does he live on ethan mars’ street

and the biggest issue - ALICE IS AN ANDROID??????????

seriously how do android children work? whats the point???? if people hate androids why would they pay money to take care of one????????????????????

honestly how do they work? because alice can sleep but she doesnt eat????? and shes not gonna age so what happens to child androids? do they just have their memories wiped and get bought by another parent????

and if alice is an android, why does todd say kara needs to help with alice’s homework? she doesnt go to school! its addressed in the same fucking chapter!

and why doesnt alice saying anything to kara like hey stop trying to ask me if i want food i dont eat because im a fucking android

also kara figures out that alice is an android at the very beginning yet just ignores it?? i guess??????

and alice has a picture in her keepsake box of todd, his wife, and his biological daughter?? why???????? kill me

todd leaves his drugs in the laundry detergent, makes kara do the laundry, and then gets mad when she finds the drugs

HE MAKES HIS ROBOT TURN ON HIS ROOMBA LSAKDJFLKSJDFLKJSDF

no one does anything when connor enters a bar that doesnt allow androids

also its never explained in game (i think) why connor does the coin trick. i suppose it can be up to the player (i see it as a nervous habit/fidget device but you could also argue its for recalibration)

no one checks the attic of carlos’ house??? and his android hid up there for THREE WEEKS????????????

connor is designed to work “harmoniously with humans” but they gave him a forensics lab on his tongue so he literally just puts blood in his mouth in a crime scene alsdjflsjflajsdlfjdlj

kara serves alice dinner and alice actually sits there but she wont eat BECAUSE SHES AN ANDROID

the guy that comes on the bus doesnt bat an eye when he sees an android in the human section of the bus (i almost threw up typing that)

leo can survive that????????

carl doesnt try to reason with the cops before they shoot markus

why do deviants self destruct in stressful situations? we dont know. we dont fucking know.

connor can show genuine compassion to carlos’ android but doesnt seem bothered by it????

why is there such an extensive android scrapyard? first of all theres android resale shops (yuck) and parts are probably expensive, plus androids have existed for what? ten years at the most? theres no way cyberlife would just allow perfectly good android parts to be thrown away this makes no fucking sense

MARKUS CAN JUST PULL OFF HIS LED LIKE ITS A STICKER

A STICKER

seriously if its that easy whats the point? they already dress androids a certain way, why have the led except to know what androids are thinking? and if theyre thinking dont they have some level of free will?? (for example kara’s turns red when todd threatens her)

no one recognizes kara despite being a relatively common model like yeah she eventually changes her hair and clothes but she’s still got the same face lkadjfalsjdfljsdlfj

connor is unfazed when he’s shot but looks like he’s in pain when gavin punches him???

connor is able to get a confession from carlos’ android but can’t make small talk asdjflskjdfljdf

the whole chapter where markus finds jericho doesnt like have a lot wrong its just REALLY tedious

though the jump scares are stupid

ra9 is constantly referenced (particuarly in connor’s story) but doesnt go anywhere. at all. unless i missed something. but as far as i know its never explained who ra9 is.

(i think its markus)

the deviant in the pigeon filled apartment is just chilling in the attic? why do androids always stay in the same place instead of escaping????

the androids in jericho are really just hanging out in an abandoned, rusting ship doing nothing. like theyre shutting down bc they dont have blue blood and incompetents but no one thinks to go get any until markus rallies them.

also what is up with lucy? why does she talk like she can see the future

THE ENTIRE ZLATKO CHAPTER HAPPENS AT ALL

no seriously!!!!! you expect me to believe kara would just go to the address given to her by some random garbage collector android in the middle of the night which leads to a creepy house with a creepy guy with BLUE BLOOD ON HIS FINGERS who wants to take kara into the basement alone to remove a tracker she clearly doesnt have??????????????????????? she would’ve just booked it

KARA ACTUALLY GETS IN THE MACHINE AND IS SURPRISED ZLATKO IS GOING TO ERASE HER MEMORY

that android that says “whos the real monster” PLEASE MR CAGE MY NOSE IS SORE

connor just fucking breaks the window and jumps in alflskdjflskjfljsdljfkdsfljldsafskdf

putting hank under cold water sobers him up somehow

the game thinks it needs to spell out for me in actual letters on the screen that hank is suicidal despite the fact that you find him unconscious on the floor with alcohol and a gun AND he says he was playing russian roulette.

connor petting sumo is cute but sumo looks like he’s from a ps2 game

markus magically develops the ability to “convert” androids so to speak.

im telling you, he’s ra9

the whole eden club thing is very...icky

like the androids are literally put in tubes like wtf

the tracis have a relationship despite club policy of wiping memories every two hours

also im pretty sure they have the same face...?? why is this not addressed more

hank hates androids but likes it when connor spares them?

kara, luther, and alice dont just stay in the car for the night

luther brings up that theres something off about alice but gets interrupted. this is not the first time it happens. it happens THREE TIMES in total before the reveal she’s an android

the jerrys break the windows like zombies and then are like “dont shoot we come in peace”

the carousel scene is cute but where did the power come from???

connor starts showing signs of deviancy but doesnt notice it??? and amandas just like “stop it” and does nothing about it saljdflsjdflsjkdf

markus does the fake phone call right in front of the person he’s calling

who brought the box up to the bathroom? was it the deviant that connor can interrogate???? explain pls

pick up the bag. carry the bag. put down the bag. open the bag. kill me.

THEY GET OUT ONTO A WINDOW WASHING LIFT BUT THEN RAPPEL UP?????????????????

a giant screen that says rise as markus and north are going up the building

markus removes his skin for the broadcast (ew) to conceal his identity BUT IT REVEALS HIS SERIAL NUMBER THAT CONNOR LATER SCANS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

north straight up wants to murder other androids for android freedom

no one finds simon on the roof unless connor goes up there

no one hears connor and the deviant fighting in the kitchen and no one hears connor calling out for help

rose is literally just 2038 harriet tubman

she compares what is happening to androids to what happened to black people in the past yet david cage expects me to believe this game isn’t about racism

kara believes that they will find refuge in canada because there are no android laws there, however the reason they dont have android laws is because CANADA HATES ANDROIDS JUST AS MUCH AS THE US

she has literally no reason to believe they’ll be able to survive in canada. theyd have to act like the cullens and move around all the time.

ntm if androids and their parts aren’t being manufactured, if anything happens to kara, alice, or luther theyre fucked!

markus had to choose between two very black and white options: violence or pacifism. i have a HUGE problem with how this is done bc being peaceful results in the “good” ending while being violent results in the bad “ending

(and for the record, going with a violent revolution can still result in freedom for androids. its just a LOT harder to keep everyone alive)

basically it completely misunderstands how real life oppression works and assumes that if a marginalized group is peaceful, public opinion will go up

thats not how it fucking works dipshit cage

kamski is literally just a weird combination of oscar isaac in ex machina and jared leto in blade runner 2049

like he’s left so ambiguous that you can’t even come to your own conclusion

connor can remark that chloe is pretty and seems sincere but doesnt question himself????

if you choose not to shoot chloe, you get nothing. you either have to replay the chapter and shoot her or look it up yourself. and im not fucking shooting her.

markus and north become “lovers” during a normal conversation

seriously. when it happened my mom and i were like ???????????????

yet markus can’t romance simon despite having more chemistry

and on that topic why can’t kara romance luther???? they have a lot of chemistry too.

the freedom march. just. ugh.

like markus really leads a bunch of androids down a street shouting “EQUAL RIGHTS” lkjasldfjlakjfjldf

markus evolves to the point where he can just look at androids and convert them like what

north and josh clearly both have a death wish

if i have to hear “we were going to crack the case” one more time i will kill david cage myself. do cops even talk like that?

gavin just straight up tries to murder connor????

THEY START PUTTING ANDROIDS IN CAMPS?????????????????? AS IF THE REST OF THE GAME WASN’T BAD ENOUGH????????????????????????

kara finds out alice is an android and luther has to spell out all her feelings for her??? like why would she stop loving alice skalfsjdlfkjdlfj theyre both androids

the fact that connor even has a machine story line

carl just straight up dies while markus is venting about his oppression asdjfsjflskjflkejiofjeijfoejflkjsflsj

we dont get any kind of resolution to connor going deviant. he just suddenly is. how does he feel about it? who cares!

“ask us something only the real connor would know”

why is that human couple with the baby so upset about not getting out of detroit? theyre human. they’ll be fine. i feel no guilt in taking their tickets.

alice can arguably forgive todd as he explains he just wanted to prove he’s a good dad. boo hoo. he’s still a dick.

connor can suddenly wake up androids too????

markus can really save the androids by kissing north or singing.

that actually

happens

KILL ME

the president looks like hillary clinton but has a “was a celebrity with no political experience” trump like background

#theres probably a lot more but this took forever and i just want to move on ldaskjflsjflskjf

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