I’ve been offered the internship I really wanted <3

I moved to North Dakota kind of on a whim with the dream of being a paleontologist, but this position puts me actually in the paleontology collections (literally my dream job long term) so like. Damn. I guess I’m doing this. I might be able to actually become a paleontologist for real.

I hope I'm not too late and asks are still open. But I wondered if you had any more thoughts/ideas/scenes/etc for the Mummy au? I totally love your contribution of Booker and Nicky as brothers and what that dynamic would look like. BAMF!Nile and Librarian!Booker give me life. Thanks for all your wonderful au ideas and fic!

Oh man, you are NEVER too late for Asks and they are currently open! In the meantime, allow me to ramble about my PURE AND UTTER LOVE FOR THE FRASER/WEISZ VERSIONS OF “THE MUMMY.” 

You see, I had a mad HUGE crush on Brendan Fraser when the first one came out. Except it turned out that the entire damn cast was so beautiful (OMG, the Oded Fehr hotness. So glad they brought him back for the sequel). They all have wonderful chemistry too, and rather similar to the group dynamics of The Old Guard. 

On top of that, I have always maintained that it’s Evie who is the real protagonist of the movie. Everyone else stays pretty much the same to their characters as when we’re introduced to them. Meanwhile, it’s Evie who goes from librarian to adventuress. She is thrown into all sorts of situations where she can prove to the world that librarians are just as damn smart and necessary as the brawns of Rick, the cunning of her brother Johnathan and the honorable warrior of Ardeth Bay.

It’s also Evie who comes out of the other end of the wild-ass adventure a changed person. It’s even more obvious in the sequel, where she takes a level in badassery. The best part about that? Rick adores her for it and they are clearly in a happy marriage versus the tired trope of married couples being all bitter. 

(I pretend the third movie NEVER HAPPENED, you hear me?!)

ANYWAYS, As Evie and Jonathan grew up rich (the museum curator clearly says to Evie that the only reason he puts up with her is that her parents were the largest donors to the museum), I figure Booker can grow up pretty wealthy too.

Sébastien le Livre is an only child who spends his life around his Action and Adventure!French Parents who have moved to Egypt to be archeologists. While they are world famous archeologists? They’re not the best parents. For they drag Sébastien along on their archeological excursions because they don’t know any better. So Sébastien spends all of his childhood time around his parents and their eccentric adult friends. Yes, they should have sent Sébastien to boarding school, like other rich folks of their time. But what kind of boring-ass education is that as compared to going out into the real world for field study?  

Sébastien’s field experience makes him brilliant child. Yet it also turns him into a socially awkward little boy. He’s rarely around other kids or attending school since he out on digs with his parents. On top of that, when his parents can’t bring him on digs, they leave him home in their great big house with his nanny, tutor and the servants for company. Since Sébastien doesn’t have kid friends, he’s always taking in stray animals, rescuing birds that fell out of their nests and doing precious sorts of things like that. He also LOVES reading. He’s fluent in French, English, Latin, Greek  and conversational Arabic. Oh, and he can also read hieroglyphs with ease.

Again, Sébastien is a weird kid.

When Sébastien is around say, nine or so, he catches seven year-old orphan Nicky in the parlor of his and his parent’s grand house breaking in and trying to steal things. His parents are out of town on yet another dig, so Sébastien’s randomly wandering around the house by himself. Instead of panicking, Sébastien just invites spooked Nicky to kitchen for tea and sandwiches out of the sheer delight of having another child to talk to. Thoroughly used to Sébastien and his soft spot for strays, the kitchen staff sits the two boys in the corner and lets Nicky wolf down whatever he wants. Nicky eventually leaves after Sébastien swears he won’t tell his parents about the stealing. But only if Nicky promises to come back tomorrow to hang out with Booker.

Nicky actually shows up the next day. Mostly due to the promise of food. While he thinks Sébastien is clearly odd, he also realizes he’s just as lonely as he is (after all, street kid orphan Nicky hasn’t survived this long on his own without being able to see people for what they truly are). But whereas Nicky is aggressive with acting out due to his abandonment issues, Sébastien tends to implode on himself due to his own parental abandonment issues. Basically, they balance each other out. 

Three weeks later, Sébastien’s parents come back from their latest dig down in Alexandria. They find Sébastien playing with this street kid out on the extensive grounds of their estate. Shocked at seeing their usually quiet and withdrawn son having a blast with this Italian ragamuffin of a child, due to being the impulsive types, Booker’s parents decide to adopt Nicky. So Sébastien gains a new brother. No matter that they’re not related by blood, Nicky is his brother.

Since Sébastien loves to read, he enjoys reading out loud to Nicky (who is nearly illiterate since he’s an orphan who never had formal education before being adopted). While Sébastien and Nicky have their own rooms at their parents’ estate, Nicky will often sneak into Sébastien’s room at night so that his older brother can read to him. Their nanny usually finds the two boys asleep together with a book sitting between them. Sébastien also helps Nicky learn to read far better than their tutor does. Mostly because Sébastien is so patient with his new little brother.

It’s because of this that Nicky comes up with the affectionate nickname of “Booker” for his new big brother.

Booker graduates from boarding school and attends The Sorbonne back in Paris. While he misses Nicky something fierce, everything will work itself out because he’ll be graduating from The Sorbonne at the same time Nicky will be finishing boarding school. That way, they both be archeologists together and follow in their parents’ footsteps. Booker plans to focus on the research side of things from either libraries or teaching. Nicky plans to actually go on digs and bring back things for Booker to study and catalogue.

Booker does eventually get sent off to British style boarding school in Cairo, as is expected of a wealthy child of his class. A couple of years later, Nicky is sent off to the same boarding school.

Nicky's always getting into fights. Mostly due to the other kids bullying him for his accent, heritage and defending Booker against bullies too. The only reason Nicky doesn’t’ get kicked out is because Booker is able to charm the teachers into looking the other way (remember, he was around mostly adults before he started attending school) when it comes to punishing Nicky. Also, their parents donate a ton of money to the school.

Except the Great War breaks out the same year Nicky graduates from boarding school. He signs up with his school chums for “a great adventure,” like all of the other young men of means did in the opening days of the war. 

However, Booker refuses to come along. He’s studied history all of his life and intellectually knows how terrible war can be. As far as he’s concerned, the war is stupid. People are going to get themselves killed over all of these royal families of Europe who refuse to apologize to each other over the assassination of Archduke Ferdinand. He’s certainly not throwing his life away to get shot at, thank you very much. Besides, he didn’t grow up with much in the way of friends or camaraderie among the other boys while he was away at school. So he doesn’t feel like he’s going to miss out on anything. 

Nicky thinks Booker is a coward who has no appreciation for a right proper great adventure. Booker thinks Nicky is a headstrong fool who doesn’t value the opportunities their parents have given them. They part ways on bad terms. 

Booker eventually relents and writes to Nicky whenever he can. However, he never hears from his little brother. The only way he knows Nicky is alive is through their parents, who Nicky constantly writes to in Cairo. At the same time, Booker doesn’t  return to Cairo because it would remind him too much of how much he misses his brother. So he throws himself into his work at the Egyptian Antiquities department of the Louvre. He also tries to ignore the raging war moving closer and closer to Paris.

Wars come and go, antiquities do not.

Except Nicky suddenly goes missing during the Battle of Verdun.

Still in Paris, Booker is dealing with his side of suffering through the war as a civilian. He suddenly gets frantic word from his parents (who still live in Cairo) that Nicky is MIA. The panic immediately starts to set in. He regrets that he didn’t do more to communicate with his little brother while he was away at war. To assuage his guilt, he goes down to the war office every single day to find out where the hell Nicky is.

After a few frantic weeks, Nicky turns up alive but injured. As a result, he’s evacuated to a Parisian hospital. Booker takes a sabbatical at the Louvre to attend to his beloved brother there. Nicky almost dies of an infection but pulls through. Too weak to go back to fighting, Nicky is honorably discharged and goes to live with Booker to convalesce.

Nicky’s not the same vivacious, passionate young man he was before the war. He’s the only one of a handful of his unit to survive both death and not losing a limb or having parts of his face blown off. So there’s the survivor’s guilt. He constantly has nightmares about his time on the front and in No Man’s Land where he wakes up screaming. Bouts of rage and grief hit him without warning.

In order to deal with the crushing swirl of ugliness that’s festering within him, Nicky starts spiraling. He starts heavily drinking. He skips meals. He starts hitting up gambling dens and whorehouses that can make your every wish come true in Paris.

Booker has no idea how to cope with it all. So he once again throws himself into his work. He feels disgusted with himself for silently judging his brother’s actions all while he absolutely has no clue how to deal with his own guilt of not being by Nicky’s side during the war. Perhaps it would have been better to have died together than exist in the sea of darkness they are trapped within now.

Within two years, the war is over. Everyone celebrates only to see the rise of the Spanish Flu Pandemic. It ends up killing Booker and Nicky’s parents, who die within days of each other back in Cairo. 

Now, Booker and Nicky are alone in the world and with only each other to depend on. Wanting to escape all the pain they’ve seen in Paris, they head back to Cairo to put their parents’ estate in order. Since their parents split their inheritance evenly between them, they’ve inherited a hell of a lot of money. At the same time, money doesn’t fix their psychological problems.

Yet while they both have a difficult time dealing with their parents’ death and each other’s war trauma? It turns over a new milestone for them. For it allows Booker and Nicky to make their peace with each other since they're the only ones left of their family. They vow that they’ll try to go back to their dream of working together as an archeologist team.

Unfortunately, it never happens. Nicky is still dealing with the PTSD and acting out. Booker tries to manage his  brother’s psychological issues and balance his work at the Cairo Museum. Problem is, it’s a job he knows he only managed to secure out of pity since their parents were the largest donors to the museum. The nepotism stings and makes Booker feel inadequate. All despite that he's a damn good researcher and brilliant at languages and hieroglyphics.

Booker once again throws himself into his work at the museum. He has no social life, rarely goes out for fun and no relationship lasts for more than a few months at a time. For he’s grieving his parents and the shell of a man Nicky has become. Meanwhile, Nicky drinks, gambles and whores his way through Egypt in between digs with folks no better than grave robbers. But he always comes back home to stay with Booker in the nice house they own together.

Booker is always there for Nicky and vice versa. No matter how hard it gets for both of them to deal with the losses in their lives, they are and will always be brothers to the end.

And then one day, Nicky finds Booker in the Cairo museum after he’s been rejected by the Benbridge Scholars yet again. All after Booker’s ruined the library and knocked over all the bookshelves after he nearly killed himself trying to get off that damn ladder while filing away books.

Nicky reveals to Booker an odd little box that he found on a dig down in Thebes. Turns out the box contains a map to the lost city of Hamunaptra…

Just Ask ll

Part 1.

“What an asshole,” you mutter, walking right to the bar. “I shouldn’t have come, I’m such an idiot.” 

You don’t know what you’re going to do, you just know you need something to be able to tolerate him if and when you go back. 

After downing multiple shots, you trudged down the hall, trying to walk as best you could back to the roomette. If liquid courage could help you at any time, it had to be this one. You were planning what you’d say to him, making up a conversation in your head and giving yourself the best arguments and points and ending with him begging for forgiveness, and then maybe, just maybe, you could actually get the ball rolling on the friction you’d been feeling. You smile to yourself, eager to battle it out, and make the leap to open the door. Your smile drops. 

He sits there, knees to chest, just staring at the wall. Unconsciously chewing on his lip, just like the good ol’ days. When he notices you, he stops and speaks up. “Hey.” 

You sigh, clearly exhausted. You open your mouth to hurl at least an insult or something to make him know you’re still game to argue. When nothing comes out, you abandon all anger and move to sit next to him. 

Shoulder to shoulder, you still can’t bring yourself to look at him. Not directly at least. 

“What are we doing, Billy?” 

You feel like you’re back in college, in the aftermath of hashing it out and taking a breather over something stupid that doesn’t matter. It seemed so simple then, and here you two were now. Avoiding things and people, and you were adding more wood into the fire you haphazardly helped to start.

“I dunno,” He whispers. “Just….thinking.”

There was something he wasn’t saying. It wasn’t fair that only your secrets came to light tonight. You needed to even the score. “Why’d you send RUN?” 

“Why did you?” He counters.

“I asked first.”

He chuckled to himself.  “To be quite honest, I was….blithering drunk and lonely.” 

Your brows perked up. “So you made me drop everything I care about because you got drunk?” 

You weren’t too mad, the liquor had made sure to placate you. You just felt a tinge of annoyance at him. Nonetheless, his recklessness struck a chord in you. It was a tango, it took two, and it only took two seconds for you to ruin your life for him. 

“Why did you?” He asked, this time turning his head to meet yours. 

You buried your face in your hands, groaning. “I have no idea.”

You do have some idea. You can’t remember a time of normalcy. The domestic life was constraining at times. Not that you didn’t love your son, but you missed certain things before him. How ironic, here you were with an ex and missing your son, yet when you were with Charlie, all you did was miss Billy. You imagined a different path, a dream, maybe Billy could’ve been Charlie’s father and not - you shook your head. 

“What?” Billy’s voice brought you back to reality. 

“Where the hell were you?” Your voice quivered.

His brows furrowed in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Why now? Why so late?” 

His face fell, some understanding showing. 

“I needed you, a long time ago,” Your voice began to crack. “I was doing fine without you! I had you out of my system, I was getting over you.”  

Then I saw your face, and now I can’t erase 15 years worth of yearning for you.

Somewhat of a lie, but you didn’t think you should be unloading almost every painful feeling of longing you had for him. He just listened intently, knowing that every word that came from you was a huge hit to your pride.

“I’m sorry. Look, I wish I could give you some sort of explanation that isn’t half-assed but there isn’t. I’m just a screw-up.” And maybe I just missed you, a lot. 

You laughed bitterly, half-assed was right. 

“What do you see when you look at me, Billy? Am I a screw up to you too?” 

“No!” He places his hands on your shoulders, gentle with you. “We all fuck up. It’s been 15 years, something’s bound to change. No one seems to have it all together.”

With a pitiful scoff, you can’t help but feel seen. To feel like he knows how to ‘fake it till you make it’. And boy, does he know. But he won’t tell you this, yet.

Your head lulls down but he places his finger under your chin, forcing you to look at him. You’re emotionally bare in front of him, and he knows it won’t be long till he’s in your position. But it can wait. 

“I like you, still. Maybe even more. You’re sexier, you don’t take my shit or probably anyone’s, you’re probably kicking my ass - career-wise I think.” 

You give him an easy smile, the corners of your eyes wet for a moment before he wipes it away. 

“Shut up.” 

“I’m serious,” He laughs. “I think I might be the worst bastard in history.” 

“Maybe not the worst.” 

He feigns shock but nonetheless sees that you’re feeling better. Unless the front you were putting was more convincing than his ever was.

“Give me one day.” He pleads. 

“One day?”

“One day. We can do whatever you want and if you love it then we keep this train going and see where this leads us, or at the end of the day if you still feel homesick, we can go our separate ways.” 

I’ll let you go. He almost said. He just got you back, and he would be damned if he was going to let you go without a fight or at least a proper vacation. How selfish of him, but sometimes you had to be. 

“I…..okay.” 

He smiled from ear to ear, internally sighing in relief. “Great! I think this calls for a celebratory nap,” He checks his phone, it’s two am. “We’ve got a solid five hours and then the fun begins.”

Stepping out into the cool breeze of Chicago, you feel a little bit more optimistic about your relationship with Billy. Home was on the back burner for now, today was about you and your needs. 

You stared at the train ticket, eyes flying everywhere trying to figure out what time the next train would come. Got to time that goodbye, maybe. 

“Maybe it’s just me and the lack of sleep but I cannot find the next train time.” 

“I can check.” He offers, suddenly distracted by the phone ringing. He seems anxious based on whatever he just received but puts up a calm front. “Be back in a bit.” With that, he walks back into the station.

You watch people walking, cars pass and get lost in the city soundscape. A woman passes you and hands you a brochure. The Cloud Gate at Millennium Park. It seemed interesting enough.

“Twenty-four hours till the next train, everything’s going according to plan.” He smiles warmly. 

“Great.” You feign excitement. “Except, where will we sleep?” 

“That, my dear, can be solved with a hotel room.”

The thought of you two in a hotel room made your mind reel. Not in a bad way of course, but well at least the room would be an upgrade from the tiny roomette. Who knows, the day is still young and maybe your horny prayers would be answered this time.

“Let’s get one now.” You were almost too eager as you took him by the hand and were on your merry way to finding a hotel. He wasn’t complaining. 

“Someone’s excited.” 

“Is it such a crime to want to fuck someone after being blue balled for twenty-four hours?” 

“You know you can’t undo this.”

“Well, I don’t want to unfuck you. Do you?”

“No, ma’am.” 

“That poor girl.” You said in a half horrified and half-embarrassed tone.

“What?” Billy asked as if he didn’t just have his hands all over your ass in the lobby. You were thankful you remembered to wear something underneath the skirt you had, afraid that the lobby cameras and some schmuck would’ve had tickets to a free peep show. 

“I don’t know whether to smack you or berate you.” You whispered. 

“You could fuck me.” The bastard smiled smugly. 

You laughed nervously, ashamed to meet the passing eyes of people outside the hotel who’d heard that. “Very fucking funny.” 

His shoulders shook as he laughed, content with himself. 

“Okay, can we focus on the fact that that room was worth my rent and then some? Where the hell are we going to get all that money?” 

“I’ll take care of that.” He said.

Within minutes, he was able to walk into a bank and you stood outside taking in your surroundings. Your eyes trailed off looking everywhere, trying to find something to pass the time. Your eyes landed on an ice cream cart not too far away and as if on cue, your stomach grumbled. 

You placed a hand on top of your stomach. “Forgive me.” 

You nabbed two cones, immediately devouring one and holding onto the other for Billy. When he came out, you gave him his quickly, afraid that you’d eat more than you’d like to. You raised your brows as if to ask if he’d gotten the money. 

“It’s going to take a couple of hours.” 

You hummed, dejected.

“Up for some sightseeing?” He asked. You nodded through a mouthful of ice cream and passed him the brochure. 

The walk was long but you didn’t mind. It was a clear day, sun shining on the water and the chatter of people made you feel like you were in some cheesy rom-com with the love of your life without a care in the world. If only it were that easy. 

“What do you think it means?” Billy asks, looking up at the reflective silver bean. 

You mess with your reflection, pulling funny faces and taking some snapshots of it. 

“That you definitely need more iron in you.” 

He scrunches his face.

“How pretentious we must be. We’re analyzing a giant space bean.” 

“Oh yes, 19 year old you must be so proud.” You quip, knowing he was the exact opposite of a valedictorian.

“Hmm no, that was more your expertise. Museum dates, staying in the library at ungodly hours, and making me study my arse off.”

“And now look at me. Totally living the life.” You couldn’t help but take a shot at yourself. Yes, you were smart, but what good had it done for you? Still a hopeless romantic.

“Don’t do that.” 

“Do what?” 

“Shit on yourself like that. You turned out way better than I did, I guess you leaving me was the right choice.” 

“I didn’t leave, you did.” 

“And what a screw up it was, hm?” He knows, no he admits, what a gargantuan screw up it was. “I always thought, now I can’t slow you down. She must be out there with an amazing career after all the shit I’ve put her through, and you do.” 

“I lied.” 

“What?”

“I’m not a nurse,” You’re word vomiting now. “Fuck’s sake I can’t even look at blood without fainting. I failed the program. I decided to choose something my mom didn’t lead me towards so I became a teacher and a…..failed writer.”

He nods and swallows.

“And then I met him. And I thought, maybe this is the right one. Maybe this time I could move on. He gave me the attention I thought I wanted. He gave me everything. But then I’d see you everywhere and I just couldn’t do it yet.”

“You still see him?” His voice is strained, and you pretend like you don’t see his jaw clench asking about this other lover.

You shake your head. “Fucker moved to a different state by the time I found out I was pregnant. I didn’t want him to come back but I also didn’t want to be lonely. So I kept Charlie.” 

“I know.” 

You smile thinking of your son. “He absolutely hates it when I sing. He loves to just throw a stuffed animal at me anytime I’m close to even thinking of singing.”

“You’re kidding.” 

“Okay, well it’s a lot funnier than it seems.”

“I mean, you are kind of a bad singer.” 

You punch his arm playfully. He yelps.

“No, I’m not!”

“I remember you trying to sing that god awful pop song in the shower every time and I’d always have to come in to shut you up.”

“You’re just jealous of my voice.”

“I bet the animals are too.” He chuckles. He yelps again as you punch his arm. 

His phone dings in his pocket again, but you don’t notice him go into anxious mode again. Your eyes are admiring the architecture around you. He slips it back in and you turn your attention to him again. 

“We should go shopping.”

You raise a brow. “Since when do you shop for yourself?” 

“Come on, you don’t want to feel the richest you’ve ever been in some fancy new clothes in a hotel room?”

You hum. “I guess I’m overdue for some things.” Your blouse and skirt combo aren’t exactly feeling too fresh anymore and you think of the pretty lace sets you could find for tonight.

“What kinds of things?” He gives you a once over, practically undressing you with his eyes.

“I guess you’ll find out.”

You’ve never set foot in a store this fancy. You don’t see yourself as living this luxury. But a beautiful lavender dress blesses your eyes and you can’t help but take curious strides to it. The material basically melts in your hand, soft and silky. 

“This is nice.” 

“Very nice.” 

You check the tag on the arm sleeve and recoil. “Eh, not that nice.”

“Buy it! It’ll look great on you.”

“That’s like $700, do you know what I can buy with $700?” 

“It’s a special night. We’re traveling, we’re together. Can you honestly not say you’re dreaming of something like this?” 

“If I told you I had used my savings for this trip, would you forgive me?” You winced, traveling was not cheap nor was it forgiving to your bank account. 

“Here, take this.” He says, pulling out a wad of bills from his pocket like nothing. You feel like you’re asking your sugar daddy to fund your next shopping trip.

“How did you - I can’t take this.” 

“Shh. Buy yourself something nice. Ok, that sounded wrong but it’s true.”

“Billy.”

“Think of it as a gift.” 

You nod hesitantly but thank him. 

“Alright, I’ll see you back at the hotel in an hour. Have fun.” 

With that, he runs off and you turn back to your options. This was going to be a long hour.

Bridgens/Peglar Egyptology AU

(for the @theterrorbingo square “modern AU” | word count: 1k fic + 1.5k AU details | rating: T | warnings: mild spooky; talk of mummies; description of a panic attack)

The Terrors are all members of the Classics (Greek & Roman Studies) department. The Erebites are all members of the Egyptology department. These two departments share the beautiful Barrow Hall building on the campus of their university, but they do NOT get along….

….until Henry Peglar, a first-year graduate student in Classics, decides that he wants to learn how to read Egyptian hieroglyphs. 

(Drabbles and AU info below the cut!) 

It turns out that most students who want to study hieroglyphs have already finished the introductory course, however, because Henry ends up in a tiny winter-term class with only two other students. The three “hieroglyph 101s” all show up a bit early to their first day of class, fumbling into a dimly-lit classroom in the basement of Barrow Hall, across from the archaeological store-rooms.

They exchange quick introductions while waiting for the instructor to arrive. Both of Henry’s classmates are undergraduate Egyptology majors: Tom Hartnell is a bright young freshman with a passion for Egyptian mummies (and, admittedly, a slightly spotty undergraduate record), and Henry Collins is a terribly anxious junior who recently switched majors from Engineering (“Please call me Collins,” he says, after Henry begins to comment that they share a name. “Everyone else already calls me Collins.”)

The moment of revelation for Henry Peglar, though, is when he first sets eyes on their instructor: a senior graduate student named John Bridgens, who walks in just a minute after the hour, with a thermos of what smells like mint tea.

John Bridgens looks almost mournful for a moment, his dark eyes soulful, a thick pea-coat sitting heavy on his shoulders (which he quickly shrugs off; it may be a chilly January outside, but Barrow Hall is toasty and warm). When John looks over to his students, though, he smiles, and his face is transformed: Henry feels like the sun has suddenly come out from behind the blustery clouds.

Henry quickly realizes that learning Egyptian won’t be like learning Greek or Latin, but fortunately John is a very good teacher. Even though John holds office hours at an ungodly hour of the morning, Henry shows up to every office hour with a bright smile and a long list of questions.

What Henry doesn’t yet know is that he’s in for the most exciting semester of his life…

(Featuring such hijinks as: John and his students Henry, Tom, and Collins get locked into the archaeological store-room with the mummies, in the dark! Henry and Tom Hartnell uncover a secret that could overturn the Egyptology department! Henry develops an unfortunate crush on his instructor! What could go wrong!)

+ 

“We’re Trapped in Here, Aren’t We?” (Bonus Drabble)

The four of them have now been locked in the basement, in the dark, for over an hour.

Collins is quietly freaking out, sitting on a storage crate in the corner of the main room of the museum storage space. Henry watches Tom Hartnell deftly trying to help Collins regulate his breathing to a pace approaching normal, with some success; Henry decides not to intervene.

“We’re trapped in here, aren’t we?” Collins asks. He doesn’t sound panicked anymore, just stressed; it’s an improvement.

Tom rubs Collins’s shoulder reassuringly, and says, “I don’t know for certain, but I’m not going to let it worry me – we’re going to be okay, alright?” Tom then turns to Henry Peglar and tilts his head, adding: “Eddie Hoar told me that there used to be a secret passage that ran between Barrow Hall and the library, and that the door opened up somewhere here in the storage-rooms. Maybe we can find it?”

Henry nods, flashes a grin that feels fake but must seem genuine in the low light of the storage-rooms’ emergency lighting, because Tom smiles back at him. “I’ll go check on John,” Henry says. “See if he doesn’t know anything about a tunnel.”

Slipping in between the shelves of Greek ceramics, Henry winds his way toward the back workroom where he left John Bridgens, who had been convinced that there must be an extra key somewhere in the workroom desk drawers.

Henry is so caught up in thoughts of tunnels that fails to notice the packing box sitting next to the shelves and he manages to trip right over it. He takes the fall hard, feeling the chilly linoleum under his now-aching arm, his eyes squeezed shut against the pain. When he opens his eyes, though, Henry feels a bolt of fear run though him – for a moment he thinks he’s gone blind, because he sees nothing but darkness. A moment later, the ancient emergency lights flicker back on, and that’s worse because Henry is face-to-face with the mummy.

Henry had forgotten that she was stored here, under the shelves of Egyptian faience. He distantly remembers Dr. Blanky pointing out “the Egyptian girl, our princess,” in her lovely painted coffin, on a tour through the storage rooms last year when he had been a prospective student – but the fact that she was down here (trapped with us, his mind whispers) had escaped his mind.

Shuddering, Henry pushes himself up from the cold floor and backs up against the wall as the lights keep flickering. He knows, he knows, that there’s nothing to fear here, but the sight of the girl’s skin, drawn tight against her skin, her eerie grimace, had shaken him.

“Henry?”

Henry jumps about a foot in the air, but it’s just John, peering out from the workroom door.

“Henry, are you okay?” John continues, his brow furrowed with worry.

Henry swallows. “Yup, yeah, just took a tumble.” He straightens up, tries to collect himself. “Did you find an extra key?” he asks John.

But John isn’t so easily dissuaded. “Are you sure you’re alright?” He steps up next to Henry, a hand hovering over the arm that Henry’s cradling to his chest (Henry’s certain it isn’t broken, but he knows it’ll be bruised a bit).

Henry looks up into John’s eyes and exhales softly to see the loving concern written there. John’s so close now, lifting a hand toward Henry’s cheek, and Henry wants this, wants to reach out and embrace; he finally feels his limbs stop shaking now that John’s here, even as his heart races and his face tilts up…

…. and that’s the moment when the emergency lights finally flicker their last, and the corridor goes dark as a tomb.

+

Some Background on the Humanities Departments of Barrow Hall

The Department of Classics

The Classics program at Barrow Hall is small but powerful. Most of the faculty get along well with each other, professionally, although they don’t socialize much. There aren’t many graduate students in the program, but most of the grad students they do have are quite active on the university campus.

Classics Faculty

Dr. Crozier is the department chair of the Classics program. He teaches early Roman history, with a focus on land surveying, and he takes a very scientific approach to his material.

Dr. Little is an associate professor who teaches Greek military history and gets very excited about ancient weapons. (“Like the shot that killed Leonidas at Thermopylae!”)

Dr. Hodgson is an associate professor who teaches Greek drama; he’s particularly obsessed with the tragedies of Euripides – the more ritualistic violence the better.

Dr. Irving is an assistant professor who teaches later Roman history, and can turn any conversation into a debate about the early history of Christianity. His most recent book was titled “Coming Out Christian in the Roman World: How the Followers of Jesus Made a Place in Caesar's Empire.” * Despite Irving’s own Christian faith and his social justice outreach work with the campus Queer Interfaith club, Irving’s a bit of a chronological traditionalist when it comes to academic research, and tends to dismiss any literature written after Augustine.

Drs. Peddie and MacDonald are actually part of the History Department, but because they teach Medieval Latin, they’re considered honorary members of the classics faculty. (MacDonald teaches a wildly popular undergraduate seminar – cross-listed with Classics and History – called “Witches, Ghosts, and Potions: Medical Mysteries in Medieval Europe.”)

Dr. Blanky is the exception to the “we hate the Egyptologists” rule – Thomas gets along quite well with a certain Dr. Reid, both of whom have a passion for film studies, and together they’ve organized a weekly historical film series for the undergrads. Dr. Reid’s top picks are old-school classics like Cleopatra (1963) and Julius Caesar (1953); Blanky, on the other hand, is partial to Gladiator (2000). He’s also the exception to the “this department doesn’t socialize rule,” being, himself, a long-time best friend of department chair Dr. Crozier.

Classics Grad Students

Thomas Jopson is an older graduate student – he’s just a breath away from receiving his PhD: Dr. Crozier, who has been supervising his thesis on the systems of enslavement in the Roman Republic and the lived experiences of Roman slaves, is extremely proud of Thomas’s sensitive eye for historical evidence. Thomas also works for the campus mental health office, leading a therapy group for adult children of those suffering from addiction.

Billie Gibson, another grad student, is part-way through writing his dissertation on the reception of Greek ideas about homosexuality in the Victorian period, under the supervision of a confused but supportive Dr. Irving. (“Isn’t this more of a History department topic?”)

“Hickey” started the PhD program at the same time as Billie, and he’s begun writing his thesis on cannibalistic imagery in Greek poetry with Dr. Hodgson. Everyone just calls him Hickey, and Henry Peglar hasn’t been able to figure out his full name (or whether “Hickey” is a first name or a last name, or even whether “Hickey” is part of his real name at all) because no one ever updates the Classics department website. Hickey is part of a student organization called the Dionysians, but they’re not listed on the university’s roster of sanctioned clubs, and no one seems to know what it is that they do, exactly.

Henry Peglar is the newest member of the department, a first-year grad student. He’s planning on studying depictions of ancient history in modern fiction, hopefully with Dr. Blanky, who also happens to be his first-year advisor.

The Department of Egyptology

The Egyptology program at Barrow Hall has been having some hiring problems in recent years. Not only did several older professors retire, but the young Dr. Gore decided to move into museum-work full-time and Dr. Fairholme was ‘poached’ by the rival Egyptology program at another university. As a result, the Department of Egyptology has been under-staffed, with too many grad students and too few professors, resulting in two controversial recent faculty hires.

Egyptology Faculty

Dr. John is the department chair of the Egyptology program. He teaches ancient Egyptian literature and has a rather old-fashioned perspective on middle Egyptian grammar.

Dr. Reid teaches courses on the history of archaeological discoveries in Egypt, and the culture of artifact (mis-)handling by European excavators. He’s friendly with Dr. Blanky in the Classics program, and he lovingly crafts discussion questions for the film-showings that he and Blanky run. (He’ll never admit it, but he secretly loves the 1999 Mummy movie.)

Dr. Stanley teaches classes on ancient Egyptian medicine. He’s known for his severe grading policies and for his impressive ability to ruin the fun of topic that involves things like magic spells and fever-demons and having sex with crocodiles.

Dr. Fitzjames is one of the two new faculty members, a dashing archaeologist with an impressive résumé of excavation in Egypt – although, as Dr. Crozier has wryly observed, some of his funding sources for those digs haven’t always been completely above-board.

Dr. Le Vesconte is the other new faculty member, an associate professor with an equally flashy history of excavation and publication. Rumor is that he and Dr. Fitzjames once found a live cheetah in an Egyptian tomb and tried to keep it as the excavation’s mascot.

Egyptology Grad Students

Edmund “Eddie” Hoar is a senior doctoral candidate, working dedicatedly on a massive dissertation about Egyptian stamps and seals. He’s been working with Dr. John because his old advisor recently retired, and with Eddie’s advisor gone, Eddie’s pretty much the only person on campus who knows his way around the dusty archaeological collection in the basement of Barrow Hall.

John Bridgens has been with the program about as long as Eddie, but he’s closer to finishing his thesis, a sprawling dissertation on Egyptian poetry under Dr. John’s supervision.

Charles “Freddie” Des Voeux is part-way through writing a thesis on Napoleon’s excavations in Egypt; his advisor is Dr. Reid. (He’s also roommates with Eddie Hoar, and the two of them are known as “(Fr)eddie” in the grad student group chat.)

Harry Goodsir is a first-year PhD student, who entered the program at the same time Henry Peglar started in Classics; the two of them met at the university-wide graduate student orientation, and Harry encouraged Henry to take hieroglyphs, which Harry had learned himself while he was an undergraduate, while volunteering with his siblings at an Egyptian museum in their hometown. Harry’s interested in Egyptian archaeology, hoping to study with Dr. Fitzjames and Dr. Le Vesconte, but there was a paperwork mix-up that placed Dr. Stanley as Harry’s first-year advisor (Harry is unhappy about it; Dr. Stanley is even more unhappy about it).

Members of Associated Departments in Nearby Ross Hall (& Their Drama)

Dr. James C. Ross is the co-chair of the anthropology program and a dear friend of Dr. Crozier in classics. Though he does have a complicated legacy with the university – being a descendent of the famous (if problematic) explorer, Sir John Ross, for whom Ross Hall is named – Dr. James is well-liked by his students and forward-thinking about his discipline.

Ross’s co-chair, Dr. Silna Kamookak, thinks Ross could stand to apply his anthropology to real-world problems a bit more intensively. Dr. Kamookak is a rising star in applied archaeology and she publishes on issues of museum collection ethics and heritage management; the graduate seminar she teaches on Inuit oral history documentation is known to be one of the best courses in the department.

Dr. Jane Franklin is the chair of English Literature; her research interests revolve around the writings of Charles Dickens. All the students in Barrow Hall call her “Dr. Jane,” and call her husband “Dr. John,” because neither would agree to let the other be called “Dr. Franklin.” A memo was circulated. It was messy.

Dr. Sophia Cracroft is an assistant professor in the History of Science department, and a frequent collaborator with Dr. Crozier in an ongoing interdisciplinary project about ancient cartography; although Dr. Cracroft has often tried to get Dr. John Franklin to permit a collaboration with the Egyptology department, Dr. John has always refused. Cracroft’s grad students say that it’s because Dr. John heard something “unsavory” about the relationship between Dr. Cracroft and Dr. Crozier. None of the grad students know what this “unsavory” thing is, but gossip ranges from the vanilla (an affair) to the bizarre (a papyrus smuggling ring).

Other Details

Goldner’s is a purveyor of textbooks of dubious quality. For some reason, all of the introductory language classes in both the Classics and Egyptology departments are always assigned Goldner’s textbooks, much to the students’ and instructors’ displeasure.

* “Coming Out Christian in the Roman World: How the Followers of Jesus Made a Place in Caesar's Empire,” is a real book! (It was not, however, written by John Irving.) I had a fantastic time reading it a few years ago – go check it out.  

A1, C1-3-5, E4, G3-5, M:2, N:1-2, Y:5 for anyone or everyone as you wish 👀✨

Ahhh thank you so much!!! I can’t limit myself to a sentence or two, that took a while 😂

1. whatare your oc’s natural abilities, things they’ve been doing since young?

Finn | Captivating.He’s always been the kind of person that just attracts other people’s attention.His friends flock around him, listen to him above others, adapt to hisinterests.. So far three of his Canadian friends have followed him to live in Americawithout him actively influencing them to do so. Something about him drawspeople in and rarely lets them go again.

Asher | Charming.Nowadays it’s just a tool to manipulate people in the right moments, but Asherhas always had it easy to make others feel at ease and appreciated and make hispresence seem desirable enough to make others want to please him. The moneyprobably does not hurt, but it is also just a mixture of his looks and aninnate ability to read other people and their preferences.

Teddy | Empathy.He was the kind of toddler that would go to another kid that was crying and hugthem or give them his toys or food to make them feel better. He is alwaysattentive to the moods of the people around him and will do his best to makethem feel better. But it also works the other way around, a person’s negativeemotions affect him very easily and can very much ruin his day.

Ace | Disappearing.He grew up in an apartment that was hardly big enough for one person let alonetwo, with a brother that might smack your head or send a swig of cold wateryour way out of nowhere to test your instincts. He always found easy ways tohide himself or to minimize his presence, to make himself seem inconspicuous &imperceptible.

1. howdo they sit in a chair? 

 What a question, i love it, it’s one of these things you have never really thought about but somehow still know the aswer to cause your OCs just tell you.

Dependson the chair & setting.

Finn |Fairly regular on usual chairs, somewhat fidgety, shakes his leg almostconstantly, does not like to sit for long periods. On armchairs or sofas hetends to pull up his legs, despite his height he tends to make himself remarkablysmall, curled up in childlike comfort.

Asher |Well behaved. Sits straight, feet on the ground, would never put his elbows ona dining table.  Might slouch in privatesituations. In worse mental states, when he does not have to hide it, sitscompletely hunched over, shoulders high up, head hanging low, even hidden.

Teddy | Messy,at least one feet off the ground at all times, sometimes two, restless,unhealthy positions, all over the place.

Ace | Delinquent,sits on them the wrong way around or tipping the chair back, balancing on twolegs, clearly cool & chill. Manspreads.

3. whatis their ideal comfort day?

Finn | Aroundhis close friends, cooking for them, eating together, just talking & listeningto music till late in the night.

Asher | Somewhereout of reach of his father. That’s pretty much it. In another country, in amuseum or a good restaurant, escaping his life for a second or two.

Teddy | Anythingin nature, hiking, camping, picnicking with Zeke maybe sneaking a kiss or two.Alternatively time with his family in any capacity.

Ace | Lockinghimself in his room and working on music all day, alternatively chillingtogether with Ben or Ellie, not even talking just being together each doingtheir thing, no demands on him having to interact unless he feels like it.

5. whois the best at comforting them when down?

Finn | Shawn,always. No one can calm Finn down like he does. He does not really know why Shawnmakes him feel so safe, might have to do with them going through so much shittogether, it bonded them really damn hard. They are completely on onewavelength. Shawn has also seen Finn in some of his worse moments and haslearned to pick up on Finn’s insecurities, and how to make him come back toreality when he gets himself worked up over something, or nothing, before hestarts to spiral. Similar experiences let Shawn find the right words to makeFinn feel better. If he’s not being especially resistant to help, which doeshappen from time to time.

Asher | Asheris pretty much a hopeless case at being comforted, it just bounces right offhis pessimist paranoia, and if someone manages to make him feel better he justfeels guilty about bothering them, or allowing them to get closer, or even allowing himself to feel better…The only ones ever even trying to comfort him are Devin or May. Devin wins thefirst place by sheer perseverance. He will make Asher feel better, noalternates allowed! Asher is learning to let him.

Teddy | Hisbigger brother. Brad is the undying optimist in the family, and that sayssomething when you know Teddy. When Teddy loses hope, which happens rarely,Bradley can easily remind him of the things he should focus on. He is also oneof the very few people that know about the darker spots in Teddy’s past orpersonality, and therefore has the insight to figure out the real problems.

Ace | Ben.Dale might comfort him in some ways, but not by actively trying to, or at leastnot showing it. Ben on the other side takes the time to listen and observe andpoke till Ace opens up, but he practically has to be forced to, since he doesnot like showing emotions and even less his flaws. Another candidate, if youmight call it that, is quite simply his mother’s domain, the night. If he feelsdown he just lies in the moonlight for a while, staring at the sky, andstrangely feels better in no time.

4. arethey up-to-date on the internet fads?

Finn | Yes.If you’d told him two years ago he would not have believed you. Growing up athome his parents very much had the attitude that he should either be doingsomething ‘worthwhile’ or at least spend time in the fresh air. He did not growup watching a lot of tv or playing video games, or using the internet, withexceptions of when he was visiting his friends. In many ways he is just nowstarting to make up for the youth he spent on the street or taking care of hisalcoholic father. It is pretty much necessary for him to have a presence on allthe trendy platforms to further his career. What has really been sticking withhim is streaming video games, as a way of socializing in any situation fromanywhere in the world, and playing games while doing so, two birds with onestone.

Asher | Godno. He feels like an old man for not choosing to get involved with the internetvery much, aside from professional uses for his studies, browsing music andmaybe online shopping. Now he just feels it’s too much to catch up to, and he honestlydoes not really see the worth in many popular internet uses anyways, mundanestuff like that is mostly hard to relate to giving the issues he has to dealwith.

Teddy | Soso. He likes to play games or watch videos online, you might find him on ablogging platform, posting nature pictures and animals, (that reminds me i do have a blog for him lol [x] ) but he is not the typethat would get into every new trend that shows up. He might hear about them, beconfused by them, and ignore them just to stick to his little corner of theinternet.

Ace | Ohyeah, absolutely, he spends a lot of time online, blogging, trolling, general surfing,he likes to get into obscure new stuff. Actual memelord.

3. whatbenefits come with being their friend?

Finn |The most reliable person you can find. You can call Finn at 4 in the morningand ask him to drive to the next city if you really need him to be there, he isat all times willing to drop anything he is doing & put in any effort toaid a friend in distress.

Asher | Wellpeople certainly won’t notice since on their end it just seems like he’s beingan asshole but he’s very much destroying his own life to keep everyone aroundhim save, so that probably counts for something. You’ll also never ever have topay for anything ever again if he’s around, he would buy you a house or two andwouldn’t even miss or even notice the money he spent. If he’s your friend youcan certainly expect unending expensive gifts whenever he sees something thatyou’d enjoy, no occasion needed, not accepting them is not allowed. He feelsthat this is at least some way to make up for all the negatives. He also justreally likes to pamper people.

Teddy | Just…support I guess, in general. Lots of warmth and affection and reaffirmation,undying optimism and kindness. He’s like sunshine for the soul. Also they neverever have to worry about their plants dying again, though he’ll scold them ifthey are mistreated.

Ace |This one is kinda hard. You get the satisfaction of solving an impossibleriddle, and learning secrets nobody else will ever know. Think of a cat thatdoes not like anybody, letting you and only you pet it. Just a very exclusivefeeling. Also comes with undying loyalty.

5. whatparts of others do they envy?

Finn | Everythingthat exceeds his own abilities. Finn might seem confident and he often is, buthis ego crumbles very easily, like when someone else is good at something he isnot good at, or god forbid better at something he is proud of. This is moreaccurate for abilities than character traits or experiences.

Asher | Aregular life? He’d rather have grown up piss poor with a loving family than inhis current situation. Alternatively, sometimes he just wished he could havethe same lack of morals his father has, then at least he would not care aboutwhatever he is expected to do, it would certainly make his life easier.

Teddy | Heenvies confident, strong, charismatic people that are comfortable and competentin any situation. Also people that are comfortable arguing and venting theirproblems. He wants to be braver in every way.

Ace | Hewould not acknowledge it, but he envies sociable people, likeable people thathave no problem opening up and trusting others. He dislikes these things, butonly because he is bad at them.

2. howmany children do they want?

Finn | None!!Finn is terrified of history repeating and somehow ending up like his father. Hedoes not trust himself, looking at his mental instability and how irritable hecan be. He feels it is too easy to affect children in a negative way, even ifyou have the best intentions in mind. He also does not feel his genes are worthpassing on. Might be convinced to adopt a child in the future but that would bea very tough & long process and would require a partner that caneffectively sway his fears.

Asher | Atleast two but he cannot see that happening ever considering his baggage, andthat his situation would have to get better which he can’t imagine either.

Teddy | Three,probably because he enjoyed growing up with his two siblings, but he would alsowait for the right circumstances or not have children at all.

Ace | Idon’t think Ace has ever in his life even thought about whether he would liketo have children or not, it’s just not on his radar at all. He would probablygo for one, once more imitating his brother, but no children is way morelikely.

1. whatwould they never do?

Finn | Drugs,suicide. Biting into a raw tomato, he’s allergic, his body can’t handle thehistamines.

Asher | Physicallyharm other people, or negatively irreversibly changing another person’s life inother ways.

Teddy | Abandoninghis loved ones.  Detestable crimes. Littering.Eat meat.

Ace | Hecan probably bend his morals the most depending on what he deems necessary, butthere’s still lines he wouldn’t cross. (but ya know that counts for all ofthem, stuff like rape for example)

2. whathave they never done that they want to do?

Finn | Iactually can’t think of anything. There are probably some vacations he’d liketo have in some places he finds interesting, preferably with a s.o., but sincehe’s successful he has already fulfilled a lot of the things he’s neverimagined being able to do. Maybe drive a racecar, that’d be cool, maybe just aroadtrip across the US.

Asher | Withhis kind of money he can do whatever the hell he wants, so he has, except maybelive freely, does that count? Not following the superficial rules of societyand just doing his thing.

Teddy | Travel,everywhere, he wants to see the deserts, walk through a jungle, even see antarcticareas, just experience any kind of environment nature has to offer.

Ace | Toucha bearded vulture. Actually perform his music. Fight and beat every single oneof his teachers. Actually scratch all that, the only answer is beating hisbrother in a sword fight just once!

5.what’s your favorite thing about them?

Oh mygoddd this is so hard to put into words.

Finn | Ilike his duality. On one side he’s this shining, over-confident narcissist, andit’s not just a front either, but you just have to push the right button andhis ego will crumble in a second, and then he’s this self-deprecating self-loathingmess. I never planned for it but this duality is everywhere with him. He’sambidextrous, bisexual, bipolar… there is no limiting him. It’s also that he’ssuch an overeager caregiver that always has to make sure everyone is okay and satisfied,that he forgets to take care of himself.. though that’s probably more why I likeShawn so much, cause he’s so good at filling that position.

Asher | Hmmmhis capacity to care for others. He’s making his situation as terrible aspossible (meaning isolating himself on top of everything) because he can’t evenstand the thought of the possibilityof others getting hurt because of him. Also just generally making things sohard for himself when he could just obey his father and live a comfy life just occasionallytorturing and murdering people, he just CAN’T he couldn’t live with himself. Orjust leaving or even killing himself and pushing his little brother into thatproverbial knife. He’s a fucking saint even if he has to portray an asshole tobe so.

Teddy | Hmmhis moodiness I think? Cause a lot of him is that stereotypekilling-with-kindness, loving sunshine kid, but it’s not all just happy andagreeable, he can get pretty dark, it’s just that the sunshine side alwayswins.

Ace | Iwrote it in the masterpost, it’s that he is silly and tragic at the same time.He’s built such an impressive fake persona that even I forgot for a while whatactually lies at the core. And all that cooler-than-though fun tricksterpersonality is just as much part of him as the distrustful loner that’s tellinghimself he doesn’t need other people despite clinging to the ones that areclose like they are the air to breathe, regardless of them being good for himor not. Also the whole thing about him being unquestionably goodhearted without realizing it, or that he himself would have chosen an alternate version of himself that would have fought at the side of his brother.

Questions from Maiana Minahal’s Students in English 272, “Filipino Women Writers”...My Responses

Dear students and readers,

I’m honored that you’ve read my work and are interested in these facets of my life and craft as an artist. I love the challenge of being given questions to write about. So, here goes!

1. What is the best thing that writing, performing, creating, etc. provides you? It seems you have many talents, how do each contribute to the person that you are? What do you love about each?  

I’ve combined a couple of similar questions here.  First, thanks to whomever has said that I have many talents; I’m flattered.  I do believe I was blessed with a variety of areas of interest and natural “talent” that I got to explore and develop in different phases of my life.  I even felt split about whether to respond to the questions in writing and using my voice and image (because I love storytelling and the voice).

First, what do I love about writing?  And perhaps writing, as opposed to performing or creating other kinds of multidisciplinary art (plays, collaborations with dance, music, etc)?  

Writing is most private; it’s also a place for confession because in many ways, it’s hidden, is behind a mask.  Writing can be on one hand too analytical, but when it’s the most powerful it can also be magic-making, enabling a metaphor to be developed and breathe, an image to vibrate and have scent and color; a scene and characters to come alive with dialogue, backstory, and motivation.  It’s a place of invention, slower invention that has no immediate impact except itself on the page - as opposed to live performance which is more of an improvisation and collaboration together with an audience.

Performance, then, is that other thing; I believe performance happens on the page, in that invention, as well, but if we’re talking about performing on the stage or at a microphone, it’s a collaboration among many elements: space (architecture, weather), time, other people / audience, circumstance.  It’s also very natural, an ancient throwback to the griots and oral historians and singers and spiritual leaders making incantations...it predates writing.  The body is a vessel with so many faculties, and this is the most exciting set of possibilities.  Should this line or this word be whispered?  Yelled?  Projected on the body?  Who is my audience when I perform?  Are you my audience?  Is my audience in the past, present or the future?  Am I in the past, present or future?  What am I able to bring to life right now, and even co-create with you a new circumstance within the present moment?  In theater and in poetry, even if it’s the same exact play or the same poem, each rendering is unique.  Did someone laugh at a different part?  Did someone cry?  Am I feeling the spirit of my grandmother that day?  Or my future child? Also, the voice is vibrational.  There’s a way in which, when we perform, we are contacting others through the voice, through the heat of our bodies; we share a space and time that never occurs again.

Creating multidisciplinary work - I’ll differentiate as projects that are collaborative, that may involve production elements such as video-poems, dance theater, or collaboration with musicians and filmmakers: this takes the Performance and the Writing to another level.  Now, let’s add other people who are experts in their own fields: choreographers, dancers, composers, emcees, filmmakers.  I have had the opportunity to work with a variety of these, in making projects such as a “Tiny Fires” poem collaboration (click for excerpt) with San Francisco State University’s Dance Theater, in which my poem was translated into choreography and the dancers learned all of the lines; a recent collaboration with Alayo Dance Theater called “Manos de Mujeres” in which I researched, interviewed and wrote about the lives of Cuban Women and the dance company danced and choreographed to my words; a recent project called “Water and Walls” (click to watch) in which we all wrote verses to music about a shared theme and a filmmaker worked with us to produce a video. These are all exciting ways for the writing to live and breathe and thrive in different ways, through different mediums.  When it comes to plays, I do not even perform in the work, but get to see talented actors bring the stories to life, with directors at the helm and production crew helping execute a vision.  It’s like giving birth...and seeing someone grow up beyond you, doing things you could not do...

2. What are some influences on your poetry/work? (I reworded this one somewhat; I hope it is still fine!)

I think I’ve answered some of this in the above, in a way.  I am influenced by many art forms, and can’t see it any other way. I’ve never sat well with only poetry or only words, which can be limiting, and often, as referenced earlier, can become too cerebral.  Words are meant to be released, like songs are meant to be sung.  I am influenced by my early exposure to playing piano and dancing ballet, and later playing percussion and dancing West African and Afro-Cuban and Salsa and a slight bit of Filipino movement.  I am influenced by the work I love to watch - other theater-makers, poets, dancers.  Music influences me deeply, and often I hear poems come to me like strains of music, with melodies and rhythms.  The natural world influences me.  And history. As you have seen in my book, I can get nearly obsessed with history.  The way it was written, the way it omits, the glimpses it gives us into the minds of people.  Who is heard and who is not; who is rendered silent in the writing; who needs to be heard, if even in imagination.  History excites me and leads me to get possessed.  Lastly, change-makers and activists, because I came out of that.  I first wrote most fiercely and performed my first spoken word poems because I wanted to tell the story of a little girl, Crizel Valencia, who died at age 6 of leukemia after growing up on a toxic wasteland left by the United States military.  I lived in her community and in her home and we drew together.  When she died, after making dozens of drawings of herself envisioning her community and her own survival, I felt possessed to write, and speak. So, spirits influence me too.

3. About the book, SOUVENIR: What was the inspiration behind the layout and style of your poems? For example, the use of different fonts and inclusion of outside texts like in your poem "Manifest Destiny 1980."  I really liked how you wrote and organized your book by using exhibits (like in the museum, there's a story for each object or subject) I find it very creative. What gave you this idea or how did you think of it?

Each poem definitely has its own inspiration, but I can focus on the one you mentioned, first.  In “Manifest Destiny 1980″ I was basically writing parallel realities - one in 1980 (my own personal story of migration across the country) and the one in 1803 of the Lewis and Clark Expedition - both which moved from East to West.  In mapping out my own family’s road trip from New Jersey to the small Tri-Cities (Pasco, Kennewick, Richland) towns of the Pacific Northwest, where I remembered growing up with stories about Lewis and Clark and Sacajawea, I found that we followed similar route as Lewis and Clark. But, while our trip and our experience was about immigrants and their daughter adjusting and assimilating to White America, Lewis and Clark went to study and exploit the knowledge and resources, and the environment, of Native people.  We were subjected to being analyzed and studied and ostracized; they were, as well, but in the end were in the position of power linked to the destruction and removal of local people.  The parallel in the layout was meant to enable the two readings (top to bottom) and also one interrupting the other.

As for the exhibits: as you probably know, the 1904 St. Louis World’s Fair (Louisiana Purchase Exposition) celebrated the 100-year anniversary of the Louisiana Purchase, which followed the Lewis and Clark Expedition.  In the 1904 Fair, Filipinos were displayed in living exhibits, forced to re-enact rituals (at far too many intervals, unnaturally, for show and even competition), eat, sit, and interact in the public eye, as the living conquests of the US Imperialists.  I realized that so much of our lives was and is performance as well - my parents needing to demonstrate their ability to work and function within the American context; my striving to fit in, disappear, or perform as the rare Filipino girl in often non-diverse environments.  Without being too literal, I was interested in how we can see our lives on display, and what is lost or gained in that performance.  And objects - what are the objects that are collected as treasures of war - including our own bodies?

4. In the poem, "My Mother's Watch,” did that situation really happen to you? If you do go back to the motherland regularly, does the profiling still happen to you today?

Yes; that poem is actually pretty true to life.  I wouldn’t have called it “profiling” in that I think that term carries meanings of power within a racist context such as the United States.  In the Philippines, it was more of curiosity, more of realizing that you could never really “go back” in a way that is simply nostalgic or “authentic” -- that once the departure from the homeland, and the living within the United States context occurs, we may appear similar in skin and features, we may be 100% the same as our relatives in some ways, but we are not because we have lost our native tongues, or cultural norms, or gestures.  And also - that I felt so much bigger and taller than other Filipinos speaks to the fact that many of our own relatives or people just like us back “home” had access to fewer resources and nutrition, whereas we were able to grow up on milk and in my case, packaged and microwaved foods.  Even in our bodies, we are altered forever.  There was an article/ interview about this poem here that may be of interest: http://www.lanternreview.com/blog/2011/05/31/process-profile-aimee-suzara-discusses-my-mothers-watch/

5. What was the hardest part of the book to write?

The whole thing was hard to write, but it was actually harder to write the “colonizer”/white man/government/military and scientific voices because they were so emotionless at times, so declaratory, and in many cases, so condescending, if not overtly racist.  To dwell in the language in which Filipinos were called “niggers” and “rabbits” and that torture of Filipinos seemed to be so much fun; or that Native and Filipino and Black people’s skulls and genetics were inferior (according to the scientific racism of the time); and also that so much of it seemed to ring true to today.  It’s much easier to write personal narrative, lyrical narrative.

6.  What do you hope for readers to remember the most?

I hope that readers can see themselves reflected in the glass of the museum exhibits.  That regardless of their background, they see how Filipino-American History is American History and not some niche piece of history, but actually demonstrated some of the most egregious cases of scientific racism and exploitation, the epitome at the end of the 19th century, of colonialism and imperialism.  I hope readers check out more of the history, and also reflect on themselves and where they come from.

7.  What is the most nerve wrecking thing about becoming a mother for the first time? (Congratulations by the way!)

I put this at the end because it feels, in a way, like a bonus question, but also something very relevant to our lives as artists.  Becoming a first-time mother involves putting everything aside - my writing, my teaching, my projects - in service of my health and the health and protection of the child I am going to birth.  I have birthed many other things: projects, plays and poems, but a human being -- this requires the most sacrifice and faith I’ve ever had to summon.  At the same time, I think it’s very important for you, readers, to know that as artists, our lives are our art, just as art is our life.  We never stop being one or another (people, mothers, playwrights, performers).  If I believed I would stop being an artist, I could despair, but if I were to stop being an artist, what kind of mother would my son have?  He deserves my full self.  So, while our time becomes more limited and we have to focus on the child, we do not lose ourselves; we simply change.

Thank you for your interest and I hope you’ve enjoyed my answers!

Any tips for anyone who wants to be a herpetologist?

Okay so it turns out I get rather a lot of asks on this particular question, and rather than answer them all individually, I thought it would be sensible to compile numerous ones I have received in the last year or so into a single long post on the basics:

What you need to know if you want to be a herpetologist

Before I get into it, let me explain my credentials for those who are interested. @amandaderrick92​ asked specifically where I did my degree: I did my Bachelor’s degree in Zoology (Hons.) at the University of Edinburgh, Scotland, and then my Master’s degree in Ecology, Evolution and Systematics at the Ludwig-Maximilian University of Munich (LMU), Germany. I am now studying for a PhD at the LMU, in partnership with the Zoologische Staatssammlung München and Technische Universität Braunschweig. So I guess I am more or less qualified to talk about this, though I would point out at this early phase in my career that I am by no means the expert standard example person—I encourage you to ask other herpetologists about their background as well. Twitter is fucking full of them, and most will be only too eager to share how they got into it and how you can, too.

Herpetologist is an umbrella term

First off, I want to make it clear that to be a herpetologist, per se, says little of the professional day-to-day career of a person. Herpetologists may be involved in a wide variety of fields, from pure academia (Herpetology sensu stricto), to applied research, to bioengineering, to veterinary work, to zoo-keeping, to animal breeding, to ranger work, to pest control, to conservation work… the list goes on. In this post I will refer mostly to herpetology sensu stricto, that is, the study of reptiles and amphibians, which is largely an academic pursuit. One of the anonymous askers above mentioned a desire to avoid veterinary work—this is almost a guarantee unless you decide to undergo the arduous training to become a vet. Yet, I want to make it clear also that it is possible to be a herpetologist and not necessarily be an academic, as I know that the prospect of academia can be frightening to downright off-putting to some. 

How necessary is an MSc or PhD?

This brings us nicely to the issue of whether graduate level education is necessary to be a herpetologist. The answer is mixed, because, as I have just explained, herpetology, in the broad sense, is so varied and diverse. You can consider yourself a herpetologist even if you just do it in your spare time (I know a policeman who describes new species of snakes for fun). But for Herpetology sensu stricto as given above, generally I would say that at the very least an MSc will be required. The reason for this you will find below, but to summarise it, it is because your education by the end of your BSc is unlikely to have had much to do with herpetology, but rather will be general zoology. Focus on herpetological studies will have to come later. 

It is important at this point already to note that the term herpetologist is in fact an umbrella term even in the strict sense. Many herpetologists study epidemiology, conservation science, invasive species biology, behavioural ecology, taxonomy, evolutionary biology and speciation, biomechanics, histology, etc. It is a science without an explicit angle of study, similar to ornithology and other organismal -ologies. So if there is a specific thing you are interested in about reptiles and amphibians, you are really most likely going to wind up pursuing that, and not herpetology per se, in your academic pursuits. But more on that below.

I’m in highschool and think I want to be a herpetologist when I’m older… what can I do to make that happen?

I think about this kind of question remarkably often. Well, actually, I think of things that I could have done better in my own childhood that would have made my life easier today. Here are a few pearls of wisdom I have gleaned from this introspection:

• Buy and read a textbook on the topic of herpetology. This is something I never did (I have never owned a herpetology textbook, let alone tried to read one), and I regret it at least once a week. There are huge chunks of knowledge missing from what a herpetologist is expected to know simply because I never took the time when I was younger to sit down and read the book. Sure, I skimmed herpetological books all the time, but I never really internalised them. I cannot identify larval stages of tadpoles. I don’t know the first thing about the actual metabolism of reptiles. I only learned this year how a frog’s vocal apparatus actually makes sounds. Learning all this stuff too late in your career is possible, but a pain in the ass, so try to get it out of the way as soon as possible.

• If you like frogs, buy Duellman & Trueb 1986 Biology of Amphibians. It is unmatched.

• Learn to identify your local herpetofauna. Chances are, some exist. Go find them. And do so with a buddy. Herping is always best done with companionship, especially if you live in an area where dangerous snakes are common (read: most of the world except Europe, New Zealand, and Madagascar).

• Join your local herpetological society. In the United States, the umbrella society are the Society for the Study of Amphibians and Reptiles (SSAR), the Herpetologists League, and the American Society of Ichthyologists and Herpetologists. In the UK it is various branches of the Amphibian and Reptile Group (ARGs). In Germany and Switzerland it is the Deutsche Gesellschaft für Herpetologie und Terrarienkunde (DGHT). These societies are always full of enthusiastic people, many of whom are fully fledged herpetologists, and showing your own interest will most likely be greeted with encouragement.

• Get into the right area of study. Choosing what to study in college is intimidating, especially when you don’t quite know if you want to choose between something about which you are passionate, versus something that will keep bread on the table. It’s romantic to think that everyone can eventually find a way to make money doing the thing they love, but unfortunately, it is not always true. Choose your undergraduate education in a way that you find will suit you and keep you happy in the long run. But now I’ve said my part on that, let me get into the nitty-gritty of what you actually need to study to become a herpetologist:

Where and what to study to become a herpetologist 

Globally, there are numerous institutes where you can study to become a herpetologist, even if they do not explicitly say so on their curriculum websites. To accommodate the relatively broad global readership of this tumblr, I will try to keep this as general as possible: 

The most important thing to think about is the ‘subject’ of study. To make headway into herpetology, you should direct your studies toward organismal or evolutionary biology. Possible ‘subjects’ as advertised by universities might be ‘Biology,’ ‘Evolutionary Biology,’ ‘Zoology,’ ‘Environmental Sciences,’ and very very rarely ‘Herpetology’. Most programmes will not allow you to specialise explicitly on herpetology until your Master’s degree, and even then not really explicitly. However, you should know that you can and should tailor your Bachelor’s experience to your own interests, regardless of its official title. Though my degree in Edinburgh was in ‘Zoology,’ I was able to focus mostly on reptiles and amphibians and evolutionary biology!

Despite the broad readership cited above, I wanted to draw your attention in particular to just a few universities worldwide that are renowned for their zoological undergraduate programmes, or herpetological research (note that this list only includes institutes that offer tuition in English, hence the rather narrow geographical sampling): 

• The University of Edinburgh—I have to list my alma mater here for pride reasons, but I do so also because I think that my zoological education was incredibly rounded as a result of doing my Bachelor’s degree in Edinburgh. They have two appropriate courses, in Zoology and in Evolutionary Biology, and you can choose between them at the end of your second year. 

• Kansas University, Lawrence, Kansas USA—Kansas has a famed herpetological history, and currently is home to some great minds in herpetology, including John Wiens and Linda Trueb. 

• Villanova University, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania USA—I highlight this university solely because of Aaron Bauer’s lab, which focusses on geckos. They do some really great research. This group is particularly good for Master’s work. 

• Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts USA—Home of the Losos lab, probably the most famous group working on evolutionary questions with herpetological systems in the world. 

• Bangor University, Bangor, Wales—This is one of the only institutes in the world that offers a bachelor’s degree in Herpetology (or ‘Zoology with Herpetology’). I have heard good things about the programme, and know a few graduates of it, but would not consider this a guarantee that it is better than other universities that only offer Zoology courses.

• University of Syndey, Sydney, New South Wales Australia—Home to the Shine lab, Syndey is apparently quite a good place to start off as a herpetologist. Plus, the reptiles in particular of Australia are really incredibly diverse and a great system for evolutionary and ecological studies.

• University of Manchester, Manchester, England—In terms of research and education, Manchester is a great university, ranked among the top in the UK. For herpetological interest, there is connection to The Manchester Museum, where a group works on frogs, focussed mostly on conservation biology.

(Für Deutschsprachige Studenten/-innen, würde ich Humboldt Universität Berlin, Ludwig-Maximilian Universität München, Technische Universität Braunschweig und Universität Trier empfehlen, obwohl viele anderen bestimmt auch super sind!)

So what do I need to get into a relevant course at a university/college?

To quash the questions before they come: prerequisites for the study of the above-mentioned courses in these institutes will almost certainly be advanced high-school level qualifications in biology and chemistry, and I can imagine that many would demand a tolerable mathematics grade as well. English language courses in high-school will not hurt in the least, especially as most work in academia is centred around writing and reading extensively in English.

Tips for non-speaking and non-vet work

As I have mentioned above, avoiding veterinary work is easy as long as you opt not to do it, but avoiding public speaking is actually fairly difficult. You see, although 99.9% of herpetological research is conducted in labs or in the field or whatever, occasionally it will be expected that you attend conferences, and there you will eventually be asked to give a talk, even if you do not volunteer yourself. Far more concerning I imagine is the fact that most academic careers require some degree of teaching. This is indeed something that is difficult to avoid if you do wish to stay in academia, but can be easily avoided with other herpetological career paths. 

Also, it should be noted by the American readers that the teaching obligation of graduate students outside the US is considerably lower than in the US, so it becomes practically optional until you are looking for a position as a post-doc or even professor somewhere! Case in point: I am trying my hardest to find an opportunity to teach, but so far it looks like it will still be months before such an opportunity presents itself.

General tips for someone who wants to be a herpetologist

• Networking is your friend. If you can, meet local people who have similar interests. Go to conferences and meet people from across the world who are interested in similar questions or animals to you, and start big conversations with them. Nowadays, it is possible to work on the most incredible collaborative projects, and it is smart to take advantage of those opportunities!

• Shocking though it may seem, there is no minimum age limit on conference attendance! If you find that there is a herpetological conference happening near you, sign up to go! I have been at conferences where there were 14 year-old students present, and they asked some great questions of the speakers! But beware at that age that there may be a lot of topics that the education system is not designed to teach you until college, so a lot may be difficult to comprehend! 

• Read as much literature as you can handle. Textbooks are great for basic knowledge, but when you get to a problem or animal you want to understand better, turn to the primary literature! Reading papers is not especially hard once you grasp the jargon, but getting hold of them can be. Join ResearchGate to get access to a lot of literature, and what you cannot get access to, you may find other ways to access…

• Learn to handle reptiles and amphibians. Do so with non-dangerous things, and with care and respect for the animals, ideally with the supervision of a more experienced person. This is really crucial for later work, and I always am exasperated by young students who clearly have never held a snake before but can identify dozens of them.

• Try to keep abreast of at least the major changes in taxonomy and understanding of the origins of reptiles and amphibians. 

• Wrap your mind around the fact that birds are reptiles, crocodiles are more closely related to them than they are to squamates, and tuataras are not lizards, but snakes are.

• Learn the word squamate, and try to use it and other technical terms in favour of more layman, less accurate terms. 

• Try to get a general impression for the families or at least orders of reptiles and amphibians. Don’t get into the embarrassing situation that you have never heard of gymnophiones or various obscure lizard groups. While depth of knowledge on one or two groups is almost inevitable, do not forget to try to glean holistic insights.

• Realise how often some evolutionary transitions happen, and what that might mean. Frogs repeatedly converging on the same niches. Lizards losing their limbs literally hundreds of times, from cordylids to geckos to anguids to skinks. Geckos re-evolving their adhesive toe pads repeatedly. 

• Try to read primary literature as it comes out, but know that at the early stages of your education, an understanding of what has come before is arguably more important than an understanding of what is going on now. Hence, read your textbooks!

And that is all of my advice for now. I am sure there are things I have forgotten, and I would be happy to expand this in the future—please let me know if there are any specific areas in which I can offer further help in urging you toward your herpetological career. And good luck!

Your writing is really good :) So you're a thief who's also a werewolf and you work free lance so you just carry out the mission and get the money no questions asked . One day a bidder asks if you to steal something from EXO a criminal wolf gang and you almost succeed except when you try to escape they catch you and it turns out that you're their soulmate , they can't really make out your face btw . You barely manage to escape but they catch your sent at their school .

Like a year later but this was such a good idea! I just loved writing every second of it and since I liked it so much I was thinking of doing a part 2…or probably a mini series all that depends on the reactions after part 2 is published. Thank you so much lovely anon and I hope this is kind of what you expected.

Illustrious ~ EXO [OT12] Scenario

[Part I] [II]

Another day,another busy working day…..

You sat on yourchair and positioned yourself in the desk ready to see the new email you got.Taking away your glasses you placed them next to your school bag, both of thethings being a facade since your vision was perfect and you were going toschool only to lower any possible suspicions coming your way, if it waspossible…same applies to believing in werewolves and all those creatures humansthink that are just sexy and inoffensive creatures thanks to Twilight.

“What do we havehere…”You asked to yourself resting your chin on the palm of your hand as yourfingers double clicked on the e-mail you received two hours ago

Dear Ms. Lim

I need of your assistance in obtaining a preciousrelic, however it is not guarded in a museum or a safeguard but it is in thehands of a criminal wolf gang called EXO. I know that with your skills you willbe able to retrieve it for me without any complications and you will bedelighted to know that I am very generous man so a 5-digit reward will be waitingin your account if you succeed. Any additional information will be attached tothis document.

“So much moneyfor a pendant….” You said looking at the pictures and then the location of theplace where the client said that the relic was

You stretchedout for a moment and then walked over to the highest part of your wardrobe wereyour backpack was to make your way downstairs and then outside of your houseafter locking it. The location of the relic was at the outskirts of town in asecluded place which meant that you had a long way to go and find a perfectplace to transform. After a few minutes you rushed into the entrance of thewoods and tossing your backpack in the air you gained speed and in the split ofseconds you were a light brown wolf running under the moonlight as you held thebackpack in your mouth.

11:30 and youarrived to the place; a luxurious looking mansion was at a hill surrounded bythe trees. At a safe distance you transformed back into your human form anddressed in your attire, tied your hair and covered your mouth so only your eyeswere visible; you remembered the e-mail said that they were 12 werewolves sothat meant that this man better pay what he said after how you were going torisk your life.

“I should justbreak in through a window since the roof could make too much noise” You saidand walked close to the mansion which reflected that their occupants were allin a deep slumber

After successfullybreaking in you cursed because the place was bigger than it looked outside;making your way to the second floor you quickly paced into the left corridorknowing that there will be a curtain waiting for you to pull on one of therobes that was hanging loosely. A pair of stairs appeared to your side and youwalked inside the chamber making sure to watch your step and you were greetedby a dark room but it was no problem for you since you knew that it wasn’t safeto step into the room. With a swift jump you held on one of the wooden beamsand started making your way towards the pendant and you finally retrieved it.

“12 wolves myass, this was way too easy” You whispered to yourself in a satisfied smile andthen saved the relic in the left pocket near your calf

You got out ofthe chamber and there was no sign that you were detected so you decided toleave everything as it was but at that second you could hear the cracking of adoor not a few steps away from you so there was no choice but to hide for abrief moment. You could make a small male figure walking towards other door andstrangely you could feel your heartbeat increasing at the split of a moment,you weren’t nervous, this was not your first time stealing something, so youthought that it was maybe the adrenaline at the moment.

“Open the door”The male called and after a few seconds he disappeared into the room so youwaited for a few seconds before making your exit and rushing through the stairs

It seems thatlife wasn’t going to let you slip away from this one so easily this time. Youwere already near the stairs when your foot tripped on the carpet (pathetic Iknow) and you were sent down the stairs rolling while you covered your face andlanded at the floor with a loud thud. You were dizzy from all the hits and yourbody was squirming in pain when the lights in the entrance were turned onretracting you from your trance.

“What in theworld” A tall, blonde, fierce looking and shirtless male said as he stared atyou

You couldn’tmove a single muscle at that moment; your eyes were fixated in the man standingbefore you which had an intoxicating and enthralling aura to you. Your brainwas too busy concentrating on him that you didn’t notice another maleapproaching you and he discovered the pendant in your left pocket quicklyshowing it to the taller man as both of them growled at you menacingly.

The growls onlygot you to react, causing you to kick the smaller male in his stomach sendinghim to the ground as the look in his eyes got intense. You jumped over him andrushed through the door forgetting about the damn relic, you didn’t want to getinto a fight with 12 wolves and not with that scary looking one. You didn’tspared a glance back but you could detect 12 different scents coming your way,you needed an advantage so you were about to transform when a huge weighttackled you down to the ground thinking that you were dead meat at this moment.

“Got you thi……”The man said but he stopped the moment both of your eyes met.

You could swearyou saw a faint glow in his orbs the moment your gazes meet, none of you movingan inch as you were in a trance again; you couldn’t quite figure his face butthere was something in his outline that seemed familiar yet unrecognizable.

“You….” He spokeagain but in that moment another voice sounded terribly close

“Lay where areyou?” A kind of higher tone voice said and the man took off his weight form you

That was your chance;you pushed him away and then started to run away from that place so in a fewseconds you were in your wolf form dashing through the words praying that theyhad given up since you decided to leave the relic to them. You didn’t stoppedfor a second to breathe or anything, it was when you were in the living room ofyour house that you collapsed on the floor and ran your hand through your brownhair that you felt your soul back to your body.

“Fuck……..this isa mess” You groaned saying goodbye to your 5 digit payment

                             -.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“You let her go?”Kris asked as his stern view was placed on Lay, the man who was labeled rightnow as the one who let you escape

“Hyung I know Idid but….” Lay started to explain but the words got caught in his throat as thejudging eyes of 11 men were on him

“At least westill got the pendant” Sehun said but nor Kris or Suho were satisfied with thatanswer

“We should do apatrol on the area to see if we can find anything related to the thief”Chanyeol suggested as he looked at the window you used to break in

“It didn’tseemed very strong when I approached him actually” Kyungsoo said and then Laysnapped back to reality

“She is oursoulmate” Lay said and all the voices quieted down

None of themknew what to say, not even Kris or Suho as the leaders of the gang knew whatwill happen know. Finding their soulmate has always been a top priority butthey never thought that they will find themselves in these circumstances, youbeing the thief who nearly stole the relic that belonged to their gang.

                            -.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Yesterday was a disaster;you were bummed at how your work went all through the drain in the split ofseconds adding that your body still felt like you received punches all over it.Entering the school you walked directly to your locker and pick up your booksfrom your locker and toss them in your bag. Fixing on your glasses you walkeddirectly to class but suddenly a shiver ran down your spine in the spookiestmanner you could ever imagine, it was as if someone was following your everystep but you couldn’t sense any danger from the stare so you let it be anddecided to focus on surviving the day.

“Thanks god thisended, I was about to fall asleep” You said stretching your body and going toyour locker

You placed allthe books back in it and only took History and Literature with you since thosewere the only ones you will need later and since your eyes were hurting alittle you decided to save your glasses into the front pocket of your backpackand head to the cafeteria to purchase some water before heading back home. Youtook the back entrance through the field to reach the street and you weremassaging your back a little when you felt observed again but this time youturned around.  

“Hello_____________” A pale and thin boy said with a stoic face as you studied hisface

You knew he wasone your juniors but you couldn’t quite remember his name, all you knew is thathe hang out with other boys that were quite known in the school but truthfullyspeaking you were never really interested at people in school so you didn’tnoticed him precisely until today.

“Oh hello Sehun,what do you need?” You ask as his name hit you and also a pain in your back soyou reached it to pat your skin and help the pain subside a little but at thesame time out of nowhere someone else appeared

“Your back seemsto hurt, were you perhaps sneaking into someone else’s house Ms. Lim?” Thistime it was one of your seniors which you recognized as the team captain butnever knew his name

“Luhan” He saidas if reading your mind and you only stared back at him due to the threateningarea coming from him

“Nice to meetyou Luhan but I have to head back home, I have important matters to attend” Youfaked a smile and were ready to escape from there when you collapsed againsttwo figures

There he wasagain, the male whom you were pondering last night with the intoxicating auraaround him but the one at his side was equally as good as him and deducting fromtheir uniform which was the same Luhan was wearing they were your seniors too.You stared at both of them feeling the trouble that was coming…..the people youtried to steal from were in fact students in your school, but how could theyrecognize you, your face was covered even when one of them tackled you down.

“Guys is notpolite to harass a woman” You said with annoyance when the guy next to thetallest one talked

“Also is notpolite to steal someone else’s belonging” He said without forgetting to addthat his name was Suho and you mentally cursed for accepting that job

“I have no ideawhat you are talking about, starting by the fact that I don’t know any of youexcept for Sehun here” I threw a bitter smile to the youngest but as a plan wasexecuting in your head you were now surrounded by 12 men all their eyes on youas if they were ready to attack you in any moment

“Let’s cut thisact now and just get straight to the point where we cut her to pieces” Baekhyun,who was in your classroom snarled towards you but he stopped in his fury themoment his eyes met yours and there was another sparkle in his eyes, his wholebody froze and his mouth was now agape as if he saw a ghost passing by

10 of them wereblinking at his sudden change of actions but only Lay knew that he was the oneright, that it was not a mistake what he said last night after you broke up intheir mansion. Suho cleared his throat and then you looked at him and he frozein his position too, as if seeing your face will send him into a paralysis orsomething but something deep inside you was becoming a whirlpool of emotionsand the moment your view landed on Lay it all started to make sense as to why youwere filling out of character and numb when they were near.

“We are yoursoulmates” Lay said with a calm expression but you almost choked at his words,this was supposed to be good news but not when a few seconds before they wereready to bite you to pieces

“Lay got yourscent pretty quickly at school and at first we thought it was just a subtlecrush on you…..but Baekhyun and Suho’s reaction prove otherwise” Xiumin said ashe saw you directly to your eyes but instead of freezing like the others asubtle smile appeared on his face

“You gotta be kiddingme” A scoff left your mouth and at that moment the tallest of them walkedforward

He grabbed yourchin and with his index finger he pulled your chin up and when your gazes meethe still had a serious expression but only his eyebrow twitched a little. Thesoft touch made your legs feeling like they were about to give up on you at anymoment so there was no mistake, these 12 werewolves were your soulmates andright now based on the situation you weren’t going to start with the rightfoot.

“We will talk aboutthe relic situation _________________, I haven’t forgotten about that” He said and you mentally cursed for getting yourself in this situation

Artist Spotlight: Brooke Jones

Get to know one of our Boston University artists from the February 2020 Collection on ArtStartArt.

To get us started, share more about yourself and your artwork.

Hi! My name is Brooke and I'm a junior at BU studying painting with a minor in art history and arts leadership. I'm originally from the suburbs of Philadelphia and I love living in Boston. I've always enjoyed painting the human figure and recently I've been exploring interesting ways to depict the figure by overlapping multiple figures and placing them in unusual performance-like poses. I was a dancer for most of my life and I find that movement and the body are strong influences in my work as a result. Other than painting, I spend my time working at the MFA teaching studio art classes to kids and welcoming school groups at the groups entrance.

Tell us about your first experience creating.

Like most kids, I grew up creating and drawing but I didn't take art

What has been your favorite part of art school so far?

My favorite part of art school is getting the opportunity to learn from truly exceptional professors who are accomplished artists themselves. I also love the sense of community among the students and how our art influences each other's work just from working in such close proximity.

What are you currently exploring in your work?

Currently I'm exploring painting on acrylic sheets instead of a regular canvas. This allows light to shine through the painting which I think shows paint strokes in a really interesting way. It also allows me to combine multiple surfaces and have them show through.

What excites you about ArtStartArt?

I love that ArtStartArt is so dedicated to promoting student work. Personally, I get nervous about submitting my work but ArtStartArt is great at creating a student-friendly platform.

If you had to choose another major besides art, what would it be, and why?

honestly I would probably major in art history because I love museums and learning about human history through art. If I had to pick something non-art related I could see myself becoming a lawyer because I am actually pretty detail-oriented and enjoy rules.

What’s your favorite spot on campus and what do you like to do there?

The studio. It's where I spend most of my time on campus and I love that it's my own space to just focus. Even if I'm not working on art I love working in there.

Describe your idea of artistic success.

It sounds cheesy but ultimately I thick artistic success is whatever is going to maximize happiness in my life as a whole. In a perfect world people would just pay me to paint whatever I want but in reality as long as art and creating things is a part of my life I'll be happy.

Rapid fire questions for Brooke:

Favorite quote:“Promise me you will not spend so much time treading water and trying to keep your head above the waves that you forget, truly forget, how much you have always loved to swim.” -Tyler Knott Gregson

Favorite book(s):The Goldfinch and Pride and Prejudice

Next place you’d like to travel:Amsterdam! I took a Northern Baroque art history class and now I'm dying to go.

Guilty pleasure:Watching hours and hours of TV

Last TV show you watched:New Girl

VIEW ALL OF BROOKE’S WORK FOR SALE

Does the Descendants universe have collages?

I assume you meant “Colleges”as in “institute of higher learning, characterized by a focus oncritical thinking, independent research, and specialized educationalcurricula.”

Yes, the Descendants universedoes have colleges, and plenty of them.

With the lack of magic, andthe extreme focus given to science and technology as a solution tocompletely replace it,* it is in their new civilization’s bestinterests to have systems meant to educate their population, breednew generations of researchers, innovators, and professionals whowill keep technology marching along at a steady pace if not by leapsand bounds, helping support the ever changing and growing needs oftheir society.

The only exception to thiswould be Camelot, which by order of King Arthur, is permanently stuckin the Middle Ages. (This is canon, and is mentioned off-hand by Benin The Return to the Isle of the Lost.)**

In an interesting case of theTemporal Clash that happens in Auradon, places like Ancient Greecedid retain colleges that were the sole domain of the wealthy andwell-off, “bastions of wisdom and enlightenment” as Plato or hisDisney counterpart would put it; but there are also institutions likethe ones you see today that are much more accessible, the next stepforward for majority of the population after they finish high school(or whatever mandatory education is in Auradon).

They serve the purpose ofboth educating their students and making them much more effectiveworkers, citizens, and happier people in general (ignorance is itsown kind of hell), and being hubs for research, culture, andinitiatives that are either too unprofitable for private companies towant to invest in, or are a less corporate, much more liberal andflexible entity that is a part of the industry/field.

Some examples off the top offmy head:

The Iduna Institute of Foodand Agricultural Science (AKA “Cocoa College”)

Located inArendelle, this is Auradon’s premierecollege/research center when it comes to all matters involvingagriculture and food, be it for reform and programs aimed atimproving farmers’ lives while keeping them from becoming obsoleteby the fast-improving technology they often pioneer and help saidfarmers deploy, ways to sustainably and reliably feed their evergrowing populations without taxing their environment too much, andfinding new and innovative ways to satisfy our hunger without havingto resort to the infamous “nutri-block”*** any more than wereally need to.

All of this is frequentlyovershadowed by the fact that initially, they were literally builtand funded to produce “The Best Chocolate Anyone’s Ever Tasted,Ever” to quote Princess Anna of Arendelle, and are actuallystill doing this to this day, though they have made their goal themuch more realistic “The Best Chocolate Anyone’s Ever Tasted, ForThis Year.”

The annual “Chocolate Ball”is a widely attended event by anyone who’s anyone, wealthychocolate lovers everywhere, along with a scant few enthusiasts whoare lucky enough to find the silver stickers inside the wrappers ofproducts being sponsored by “Cocoa College” that year.

It’s widely criticized as avastly overblown and self-indulgent abuse of power by the reigningqueen and her sister (and later on, the second in line to thethrone), kept going only because:

The exorbitant entrance feesand money raised are donated to charity and government programs,along with being heavily taxed in general;

There are few completelylegal things the competitors aren’t willing todo, that oftentimes far exceed the monetary estimate of whatthey would earn from a lifetime’s worth of selling a product with asingle, or the much coveted double Seal of Royal Approval;and,

The products with silverstickers are frequently produced by a series of small, independentfarmers, or corporations that are known to be much more enthusiasticabout their legally mandated “social responsibility” programs.

(And completely offleft-field here, I did NOT expect to write this much about “CocoaCollege” all in one sitting.)

The Auradon Extreme Weatherand Climate Research Center (AKA “The Hot House”)

It seemed only appropriatethat Auradon’s primary research center for living in the harshest,most hostile, and deadly environments would be in a series ofman-made underground tunnels some kilometers from Agrabah.

Here in the “Hot House,”its students and its resident researchers work hard to figure outnewer, better, cheaper ways for Auradon’s residents to “Seek,Sleep, and Sprout”--that is to say, safely explore new environments, comfortably live inthem full-time by choice, then start to work in and manipulate theirenvironment to better suit their needs and that of the rest ofAuradon, to the point where average people will start to wantto live in there—in any environment, or corner of the worldthey so please.

They’ve got biomes that areeven hotter than Agrabah in the peak of summer, standing out of theshade, with a giant circle of sunbathing mirrors pointed directly atyourself, and focused with laser-like precision on you.

They’ve got biomes where ifyou or your equipment don’t freeze solid within the first minute ofstepping in after the airlock shuts behind you, it’s considered asuccessful design that merits further iteration and study in thehopes that you or your equipment will freeze solid within twominutes.

They’ve got biomes whereit’s not a question of “if” you are going to get struck bylightning, it’s “how soon after the airlock shuts behind you”and “how many times in the same spot.” (The current record are“five minutes and forty-three seconds” and “seven.”)

The designs, the safety gear,and the clothes you can see here are oftentimes described as “alien,”“like something at the bad parts of a drinking binge,” and“didn’t realize something like that could even be a thing.”

And that’s after theyrefine, improve upon the designs, and make them functional andfashionable, along with understandable to the populace at large.

In a nutshell, the Hot Houseis best described by their motto: “To explore whole new worlds, andmake them our home.”

The Halls of Remembrance

Unlike the Museum of CulturalHistory which is content to just educate and show-off the relics andpractices of a bygone era, the Halls of Remembrance in Greek seek to keep themalive, or even bring them back from the dead.

The courses and the classesoffered are incredibly rich and varied, all unifiedby the fact that they are for traditions, vocations, and arts thatare either now completely obsolete, quickly being outpaced bytechnology, or have simply fallen out of the tastes of the public atlarge to be viable outside of a publicly-funded institution such asthis.

Want to learn about Medievalstage plays? Slave songs from New Orleans? Weaving and making threadusing a spindle? The crafting and the use of weapons throughoutcivilization, especially the originals that the current designs theRoyal Guard SIA (Standard Issue Armaments) werebased on? Medicinal horticulture before modern pharmaceuticalsrendered that largely obsolete?

The Halls have a class and aprofessor for that, and oftentimes with highly specific variantsshould you want to specialize.

About the only issue anyone--visitor, student, or staff--has is that while it’s very easy to find the entrance, onceinside these vast, expansive halls filled with classroom uponclassroom upon classroom, it’s very easy to get turned around and unable to findthe class you originally intended to enroll in at the time you weresupposed to be there, or even just know where in the complex you are.

(The architect, Daedalus,blames being introduced to 3D modeling and the ease with which thatyou can go completely crazy, without having to deal with theintegrity of the materials of your models, finding enough physical room tobuild it in, and having to create an entirely new model of a ladderor other supporting structure once the original gets too high.)

Fortunately, the Royal Guardis very keen about recording and monitoring who enters, and everyonecomes out eventually at some point, oftentimes with a number of new,interesting skills in all manner of vocations, arts, and sciencesthat have long ceased to be useful outside of conversations atparties.

You’re guaranteed tolearn something new at the Halls of Remembrance, you just don’tknow what.

* One that has failedmiserably, with how the Descendants themselves keep showing thatmagic is far more useful, and very dangerous when most of thepopulation do not have it, nor are people used to dealing with it.

** What modern amenities, ifany, were allowed is up in the air, and I imagine this did not worknearly as well as his majesty Arthur intended it to. Feel free toask.

*** A “nutri-block” is agiant brick of mostly human-edible complex carbohydrates, dominantlyfiber. It is loaded with most of the necessary nutrients and mineralsthat one needs to continue functioning from day to day. It’s cheap,easy to produce, and keeps astoundingly well, but even the RoyalGuards at Faraway and the Borderlands only ever eat them as acomplete and absolute last resort as the experience is likened to“literally chewing on tree bark, except much worse--at leastthere, it tastes just of wood, and not also of cardboard, pulp, andglue.”

January 28

Hi everyone! I haven't written in a while, so this will be a pretty long post. I haven't written since Christmas Day, when my family was here and we were traveling around together. So much happened during that trip, there's no way I could cover it all. So I want to go ahead and focus on what's happened since my family left, because there's so much to tell! I'm going way back to January 29, when I took the 8:00am Shinkansen from Tokyo to Osaka. I was in a bit of a rush getting packed and ready to leave that morning, but we made it to the station at around 7:40, which we thought would give me plenty of time to get on my train. It would have been, except that the days leading up to the New Year are the busiest traveling days all year. I was starting to freak out a little, because I didn't know what platform I needed to go to, and every station attendant I saw was already surrounded by other travelers. I checked the time when I had 8 minutes until the train pulled out, freaked out a little, and started pushing my way towards a station employee. It all turned out fine, but I hadn't even been on the train a full minute when the doors closed and we started moving. After I got home, I got to take it slow and relax, and I met two of my host mom's former piano students when they came over with their newborns to catch up with my host mom. I had no idea that my host mom kept in touch with her former students, but when I asked her about them she said she still communicates with lots of them, and that in some families, she's taught two or three generations over the years. After we all finished visiting, my host sister, Azumi, took me to get my haircut. This was my third haircut since leaving Austin, and just like the first two I was terrified that my hair would get massacred. It went very well, though, because this time I was able to talk with my barber as he worked and tell him what I wanted. He asked lots of questions about barbershops in America, and asked me what each tool was in English as he used it. As we were wrapping up, he asked me which college I was studying at in Osaka, and I had to explain to him that I was only a sophomore in high school. He had been under the impression that I was much older than I am, which I'm still not used to, but he laughed about it and had me guess how old he was. Hopefully I'll be able to go back to the same place next time, but you never know. The next day, my host mom prepared a sort of yogurt, but it was very different from what I had been expecting. She added in every fruit she could find at the store: apple, strawberry, mango, banana, papaya, coconut, kiwi, and aloe, which I had no idea you could eat. Since then, there's always been some in the refrigerator to snack on. The next day, New Year's Eve, my host family (minus my host brother, who was still in Canada) and I all went to a traditional Japanese hotel in Mie, a prefecture close to Osaka. The hotel was built on top of several hot springs, which I had never used before, and it was where I got my feet wet (PUNPUNPUNPUN). It was actually a lot less uncomfortable than I had thought it would be, and my host mom's boyfriend, Goro, and I were able to relax in the baths for half an hour or so without feeling too strange. After we got out and dried off, we had a little down time and then went to dinner, which was a traditional Japanese feast. There were courses on courses on courses, with lots of food that I never knew existed. In particular there was a very expensive shellfish that was sort of hard when raw, but when it was cooked it was some of the best food I've eaten in Japan. Throughout the meal there was entertainment provided by a man performing traditional Japanese dances and a sushi chef who prepared an entire fish in less than a minute. The chef was very impressive, but the fish's tail was still twitching in the middle of the dish, which sort of threw me off of sushi for the rest of the night. The dances were very well performed, and I later found out that the dancer was actually just my age;he just looked much older. Once I learned that, I was even more impressed by his performance. The next morning, New Year's Day, we all soaked in the baths one more time, then stopped at a temple to pray for good luck on the way home. The temple seemed very different from when my family and I were touring because instead of a tourist site, it was the center of the community and the celebration for the coming year. There were families having picnics inside the walls, there were barbecues going on all over, and people were pouring in to wish each other a happy new year and to pray. The next day, January 2nd, my grandmother came to visit! We met up explored Tokyo, then I went back to school for a few days while she saw the sights in Kyoto. On the 8th, Azumi had a piano performance in a hotel lobby with an all-you-can-eat cake buffet, so my host mom and I decided to go check it out. All in all, it was a very fun experience, and I got to hear Azumi perform for the first time. She was very good, and her personality was much more professional while playing than while rehearsing and relaxing at home. On the way home in Goro's minivan, we jammed out to some American pop songs, which transitioned into Michael Jackson, which transitioned into Elvis Presley. I thought it was hilarious, because everyone was singing “You Ain't Nothing But A Hound Dog” as we were driving through neon signs and traffic. Maybe I was just in a happy mood, but I thought it was really fun. The next night, Goro took me and my host mom to see a performance at Osaka Castle, and it wasn't like anything I'd been to before. The actors were all on a stage in front of us, and images were projected onto the walls of the castle behind them as the story progressed. I didn't understand what the actors said, but the story was easy to follow, and the setup was incredible! When my grandmother came back to Osaka after Kyoto, we went to see it again, and it was just as good as the first time. On the 10th, I went to school from the Tsuchida's home for the first time, and it was surprisingly easy. There's only one turn, and it's at a dead end, so I don't think there's a way I could get lost on my way. School itself was pretty fun, and we jumped straight into some new grammar and vocab in Japanese class. On Thursday, Bain and I went to the middle school attached to Momoyama, our high school, and made calligraphy and mochi with the middle school students. It was interesting being around younger students, because they spoke to us the same way they spoke to the teachers, as opposed to other students. The next day I went on a field trip with Bain, Mr. Shuto, who's my homeroom teacher, and with three other students to go look at ancient pottery. The trip was incredible from the start, because instead of going to a museum, we went to the government office where newly uncovered pieces are sent to for cleaning and categorization. We got a behind the scenes tour of how the entire process works, and were allowed to touch and hold pieces of pottery more than a thousand years old. We ended with a project similar to a rubbing; we used little sacks of ink to copy the patterns from small pieces onto paper. It was awe inspiring to recognize just how much history Japan has, and how lucky I am to experience it. After we came back to school, Bain and I had to watch a biking safety video since we both commute by bike now. I had been expecting a video like Red Asphalt from driver's ed, but instead it was set up like a drama, with flashbacks and cliffhangers. After that we went to our homeroom classes to present about our field trip experience. Because I'm the last student in my class by alphabet, I was the last one to present, but this time I was much more comfortable leading up to my turn speaking than before. I think that taking a break from foreign exchange and taking time to be a tourist recharged me, and since my family left, I've been much more outgoing than before they came. The next day, my grandmother came over to my host family's house, and we made a huge sushi lunch before dropping her off at the airport. Even though all of the food was just from a normal supermarket down the road, my grandmother thought the taste was better than at Uchi, one of the only sushi restaurants in Austin. The next week, in my Tuesday math class, I started making friends with some of the guys in my Japanese math class, especially a guy named Takeo. He's only spoken with me in English, which is very impressive for a student here who hasn't gone to study abroad. He's applying to come to either St. Stephen's or St. Andrew's in Mississippi next year, and I think it'd be really cool if he came. I think that the school is actually nearing a decision now, because I heard the pool of prospective students is down to 5 or 6. I'm very excited to find out, too, because they'll be the student I host in Austin next year. In our Thursday home economics class, we all presented a children's book we had written. We split into small groups of 5, and out of each group chose one person to present. I was chosen for our group, so I had to read my (very basic) Japanese to my class, but everyone thought it was a good book topic, so we all had a good time. At the end of the period everyone voted for which book they thought was the best out of the ones that were presented, and I came in second! After lunch we did school photos for our student ID cards, which was very fun. Everybody was joking around in line. It was really fun, and when I joked about being a model part time in the US, my homeroom believed me, and I had to explain that no, I'm not actually a model, which I never thought I would have to clarify. After school I went straight to my first violin lesson with my host sister and her teacher. It was something. The teaching method was very different from in the US; my teacher, Mr. Matsuda, physically corrected my form as I was playing, and had me work on all of the very basic aspects of playing. Overall, the lesson went very well, and my teacher wants me to pay him by helping him improve his English during our lessons. I'm really looking forward to working with him again, and I think that I'll be able to improve quite a lot here. On Sunday night, Ryosuke came home from Canada! Before going out to the airport, I met one of his best friends, and we went out to the airport with him. It was a very festive atmosphere, because 40 students were coming home from their year abroad, and everyone's family had come out to meet them. I was given a Japanese flag and a “Welcome Home” banner to hold, which I thought was pretty cool, until I saw another group of students throwing their friend in the air for celebration. When Ryosuke came out and saw his family, he ran up his mom, ducked past her, and hugged Azumi first, then eventually went back to his mom. It was a really lighthearted way of greeting his family. After he and I met, he had to go and take a big welcome home photo, and as he was taking it he joked to me about his double chin, since he had gained 10 kilograms, or about 20 pounds, while he was gone. During the car ride home he and I talked a lot, and in general joked around about Canada and his family's English skills. Everyone was poking fun at him too, for gaining so much weight while he was gone. When his grandmother saw him, the first thing she said was “You got fat, didn't you?” Poor Ryosuke. Roasted by his own grandmother. On Monday we threw his big welcome home party with his soccer teammates, which was crazy fun. Everyone came up to me and introduced themselves, then told me bad jokes in English about each other. It was really cool, and since then I've seen lots of the soccer team around school, and they call out and wave to me when they see me. The next day we went to go eat blowfish, which Ryosuke said he missed a lot, and then to go to Spa World, a huge hot spring type place in Tennoji. It was really cool, and it seems like a sick place to hang out. On a weekday, a full day pass is only about $10. The baths themselves were really cool. There were two that stood out in particular: one that was filled with carbonated water that bubbled on your skin, and one that was just filled with sake, Japanese wine. It was pretty awesome. On Thursday in track and field, we said goodbye to the students on the team that would go to study abroad next year, and I felt really at home with the team for the first time. I'm still not sure if I want to stay in the club, though. I really do like the people, but the workouts don't appeal to me, to the point where I consider skipping more often than not. My feeling is that since I don't love it, I might as well try something new for the second half of my time here, but if I do that, I won't be able to compete, which I think would be very fun to do here. That's a problem for me to figure out myself, though. That's all for now! I love you all!

Are You a St. Petersburg Person or a Moscow Person?

The SRAS global partner program has many options for study abroad in Russia. I chose St. Petersburg mainly because of the historical and literary background this city holds, but each option has its own amazing draws. Since I’m only experiencing one place fully, that’s all I’m able to share, but I have gotten the opportunity to visit Moscow and interact with SRAS students there, and they came to visit SPB as well. When I think about it, I didn’t really consider study abroad in Moscow. I didn’t know to wonder whether I would be a St. Petersburg person or a Moscow person, which actually turns out is a thing. While I loved loved loved visiting Moscow, I think I got lucky and chose right for myself with St. Petersburg. It’s smaller, more manageable for someone who’s already not a big city person, and there’s still an endless amount of necessary activities. Plus, I really appreciate my close proximity to nature, despite living in a city. (This may also be a thing in Moscow. I’m not sure.) But since I myself never really considered which of Russia’s major cities I would work better in, I thought it could be helpful to give other students this opportunity. Through a little compare and contrast of the two cities, put together with the help of Katheryn, who studies in Moscow also through SRAS, here’s a small chance to try and decipher which of these two beautiful places you might prefer.

In order to look at Katheryn’s opinion through the appropriate lense, you should know that at her home university she studies rhetoric and history. She says that, because her previous classes there have focused mostly on Russian politics and history, rather than art and literature, she had more background knowledge on Moscow, which partly led to her studying there. I definitely can say the same for my decision. My favorite Russian culture course thus far has been Russian Modernism, which focused on the literary movements of the 20th century in Russia and the history behind them. One of the most incredible books we studied is literally called Petersburg.  (Andrei Bely. Read it.) So I can definitely agree with Katheryn about the fact that those classes informed my decision. If you’ve had the chance to take Russian non-language courses before, try and remember what parts you really enjoyed, and maybe check out which city lends itself more to those topics. However don’t let this be too definitive if you’re on the fence. In the end, each city has a bit of both.

Here in Russia, Katheryn is apart of the Russia as a Second Language program, which includes a higher number of language class hours than elective class hours. I’m in the Russian Studies Abroad program which has less language and more electives. This decision is really just based on which you need/want more hours studying. I needed more electives in order to fulfill my Russian major, while many students want to focus more on improving their Russian. If you don’t need the elective hours, I would recommend the RSL route, as you will never get better Russian language courses than there are IN RUSSIA, and the classes can be extremely rewarding. However, I’m not unhappy to be an RSA student. I get to study politics, history, and literature all from the distinct Russian perspective.

That’s all just background. For more specific details about life in Moscow and MGU, I asked Katheryn to paint me a couple of pictures, which I’ve interjected my own comments into here:

Her Typical Day

Katheryn: I tend to wake up around 9am, get ready for the day and leave my dorm pretty quickly. I’m not very productive in my room (because...bed), so I’ll head to the stolovaya or a building with good internet to knock out some work before class. My classes run from 12 - 6 on Monday, and 12 - 4 Tuesday through Friday. After, I’ll do some homework, watch some Russian movies, head to the center, or explore on my own. I’m involved with SRAS’ Home and Abroad internship program, so my workload is a little heavier than some of my classmates, but I still have plenty of time to enjoy myself.

From the sound of it, Katheryn is a much more productive person than I am, but our class schedules are a bit different. For one, hers seems more predictable. As I’ve mentioned before, class scheduling in SPB can get a little hectic. Electives run different hours every week, starting and ending abruptly after five or eight or ten meetings. Russian language has a consistent schedule, but some days meets at 9, some days at 10:50, some days at 12:40 etc. It keeps you on your toes. However, when you don’t have class, all those same possibilities Katheryn mentioned are available in St. Petersburg, too.

Moscow’s Typical Weather  

Katheryn: I arrived mid-September and it’s now late-October. It was already sweater weather when I arrived and would usually drizzle in the morning but clear up before I left the dorm. The drizzle has now transitioned to snow flurries -- but nothing that actually sticks. There have only been a couple days of true “rain.”

Again, not so different--well, except for there only being a “few” days of rain. In St. Petersburg, leaving your room without an umbrella, even on the clearest of days, is playing a dangerous game. (The weekend I spent in Moscow was also very rainy, but that was only one weekend.) We’ve just started getting snow flurries, as well! So exciting, even though nothing has resulted from them yet. Locals in St. P often mention how, in the past years, Russian winters have gotten less and less foreboding, but hopefully soon we’ll see some real snow blanketing the city.

The City

Katheryn: Although Moscow has a New York City kind of vibe, the two cities are completely different. While NY has a population of 8.5 million, Moscow has 15 million, but feels less crowded. (Does not hold true for rush-hour metro travel. Buh-bye, personal space!) The city itself is much larger, and the infrastructure is appropriately designed to accommodate the population (both pedestrians AND motorists.. go figure!!). It’s also less expensive.

Even in our few days in Moscow, I can definitely agree that it felt less crowded. The streets and sidewalks are much wider than here in tiny, cramped St. Petersburg. Walking down a crowded street here can get annoying if you want to get somewhere fast or walk alongside a friend. People are always stopping without concern right in front of you to talk for a second before continuing on, rendering the sidewalk completely useless. But that’s mainly in the city center or more popular crowded areas. Just a couple streets over in any direction, things can clear up and calm down. I’ve gone running a couple of times here and, as long as I choose a route I know less people traffic, there’s no problem having a clear path. (Also side note I just remembered, Moscow had suuuch good stolovayas.)

The People

Katheryn: Generally speaking, most people are self-aware, yet completely uninterested in my existence unless we’re directly engaged. I think Arseny Khalashnikoff said it best: “If you drop your metro card in New York, people probably won't notice. In Moscow, however, an old lady will run after you down the street to give it back, and then say what a fool you are for walking so fast and being an absent-minded loser… Where’s your ‘thank you,’ by the way? You should have learned good manners from your mother.”

This is true for St. Petersburg, as well, and, somewhat begrudgingly, one of my favorite things. Once I walked from my room to the metro (probably ten minutes) with one of my shoes untied, and I think I was stopped by about four different people who really really needed to tell me that my shoe was untied. It can be somewhat pestering, but when you think about it, people are just looking out. It’s a strange kindness I have never been exposed to and never would have expected.

The Ideal Day in Moscow

Katheryn: Yesterday was pretty perfect. Class was cancelled, so I met a friend for lunch in the center. Once we separated, I found a cozy coffee shop with good internet and fresh donuts, sat down and knocked out some homework. After a couple hours I ventured to the Bulgakov Museum and explored the surrounding area, including Patriarch’s Pond. A friend hit me up while I was buying some snacks at a grocery store and I soon found myself in a sixth story bar with a panorama of the city. After having our fun, we went home and readied ourselves for the next day.

An awesome sounding day, in my opinion, and very doable in St. Petersburg, as well. I’d say my favorite days here are definitely the ones spent exploring hidden parts of the city via metro or taking the train out a couple of stops to smaller, more residential towns.

Favorite Part of Moscow

Katheryn: It’s not so much a place as an institution: the Moscow Metro. It’s really exciting to head somewhere new and have no idea what kind of metro your destination will have. The architecture, marble, murals, and mosaics at each station reflect the time and place of their construction. Functional art!

I only got to see a few, but the Moscow metro stops were really very beautiful. I can understand why it would make traveling on that explosion of public transport more enjoyable. No shade, I am just not a big city girl and that thing is super big and complex. I’m very appreciative of how simple the metro is in St. Petersburg.

Meeting with Locals

Katheryn: There are plenty of opportunities if you’re willing to put yourself out there. There are Facebook groups like Moscow Language Exchange and Давай по-русский that host weekly gatherings. Anticafes (coffee shops where you pay for your time, not what you eat/drink) and free walking tours are also a good way to meet people and practice using the language. If you meet someone you’d like to see again, don’t be shy about asking for their contact information! You’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain.

I can’t say I’ve tried these methods in St. P, but I’m sure similar possibilities are available. I love anticafes here and I’ve heard they’re a great way to meet locals because the atmosphere really encourages casual chatting with those around you. And our program coordinators are always encouraging us to just talk to people and make contacts. People want to talk about themselves, you know. However, I’m perhaps a bit more awkward than Katheryn, so I’m thankful that SRAS (at least in St. Petersburg) offers programs like language buddies, where you’re put in touch with someone who wants to practice their english and with whom you can practice your Russian. They also host fun events in order to help  English- and Russian-speaking students to interact. 

Living Accommodations

Katheryn: I live in Moscow State’s iconic Main Building -- one of Stalin’s “Seven Sisters.” To get to my room I have to pass through the main security checkpoint, my building checkpoint, take an elevator, say hello to my floor dezhurnaya, walk through a long hallway and unlock my door. I share a small suite with one other girl, and both the entry way, a small toilet room and a shower room are in the common space, which is no larger than one king-sized bed. We have our own rooms furnished with a twin bed, desk, bookcase, closet, chair and large window. There are common kitchens scattered throughout each wing, and, although we don’t have a fridge, the window is cold enough to keep my produce cold. There are also like, four different cafeterias within five minutes of the dorm. The nearest metro is a ten-ish minute walk, and the grocery store/shopping mall another seven or so minutes further.  

I cannot say we live in such a beautiful building here in St. Petersburg, but the accomodations are still very nice. The dorms are approximately three seconds from where all the international students have class, and the whole area is enclosed, although the gate is only actually closed late at night and on the weekends. When it’s closed you have to go through a special door, which requires showing your dorm ID. When it’s open, you only have to show the ID in order to enter your dorm. There are two dorm buildings--lestnitsa 7 and lestnitsa 8. I think most Americans usually end up in lestnitsa 7, which has mostly small-ish single rooms with their own bathrooms and then a shared hall kitchen. Only a few people share their rooms. I think that in lestnitsa 8 there are more shared rooms and the bathrooms are also a common space, but I’m not positive. Everything you need is extremely close to the dorms.

Who You Spend Time With

Katheryn: I spend most of my time with the people I’ve met through language exchange meetups, but still occasionally hang out with students from class.  

Alternatively, I spend most of my time with fellow international students I’ve met through the program or class. We sometimes meet up with the few Russian students we’ve met, or I hang out with my language buddy who shows me around the city. 

Hardest Part of Living in Moscow

Katheryn: The hardest part of living in Moscow is true for all of Russia -- it’s almost impossible to find tacos!! As far as products go, pretty much everything is available and cheaper than in America -- but if you’re fond of specific brands (for me, it’s facewash), make sure to bring a good supply.  

Oh my god, yes, get your fill of tacos before you come!

St. Petersburg from a Moscow Student’s Perspective

Katheryn: I really enjoyed my time in St. Petersburg, but it’s true that the two cities are completely different. The sidewalks in St. Pete are much smaller, the weather much damper, and the metro less necessary for daily tasks. It’s also true that the St. Pete students are much more cohesive than we are. The locals I met in St. Petersburg were (rightfully) incredibly proud of their city, history and culture -- one of my new friends even told me “I’d never sell my soul and move to Moscow.” I still prefer Moscow.

I loved Moscow, but am also insanely loyal to St. Petersburg. A few of my friends during our time in Moscow mentioned maybe preferring it over St. P and it felt like blasphemy. But maybe that just goes to show you can fall insanely in love with either city you end up in. With an amazing place like Russia, it’s hard to imagine you could choose wrong.

But still, St. Petersburg forever.

And yeah, sure, Moscow is pretty nice, too. 

DAY 8 (WEDNESDAY 20TH SEPTEMBER)

shut up and write (unedited)

So I’ve done heaps of design stuff the last few days which has been amazing to see that LDF has to offer except that there is still so much I want to see I feel like I can’t possibly do everything. I originally felt like two weeks was a long time to be here but it’s gone so fast I wish I could stay for another month. But there is still time to see and do things and even though I do feel extremely busy and run off my feet my mindset is I can relax when I’m home.

So yesterday I visited the V&A and it was so beautiful. The building itself was amazing and had such a strong presence which allowed the artwork to be featured but it was so massive it felt like I would have needed days to really take everything in but I only stayed a few hours because the fact that it was so overwhelming actually made me want to spend less time there. I went first to the reflection room and my initial reaction was like its beautiful but then after a minute I just sort of was thinking…. Now what? Like it wasn’t as exciting as it was photographed to be and it was honestly not as impressive as I built it up to be in my mind.

I think for me actually walking around the V&A was far more inspiring than the exhibitions. I did however enjoy the ice-skating sculpture outside in the gardens. I think this may have mostly been because the location itself was beautiful but the installation itself was also well structured and cool. In particular, the smooth texture of the plywood and details of the holes in the shape was impressive how it was flexible but still sturdy. We did have a few questions however about the durability of the structure if it was to stand in the cold snowy climate like it was intended for. We left the V&A after quickly checking out a few more exhibitions. One in particular that grabbed me was the influence about social media in design throughout history. It contained some interesting artefacts and told an awesome story.

Personally I feel I do get a greater sense of the city and design within it as well as getting my creative juices flowing by just spending time wondering through the smaller design studios and events that are part of the LDF rather than the big museums. For example, after visiting the V&A we strolled through Brompton checking out studios and such that were on the map as part of the festival and I just found it much more thought provoking and worthwhile for me personally to soak that in. We visited around 5 different checkpoints and each had something different to offer. It was the small secretive areas that really enticed me rather than the V&A.

Continuing the day…

We picked up our Letterpress cards this morning and they looked beautiful displayed all together. The colours and different styles were somehow not jarring and instead looked like one big collection. The rest of the session we discussed the brief and tried to get a clearer idea on what we would be doing when we got home. I think the third years in particular are really feeling the stress and no its going to be a bit of a pile on of work when we get home. I tend to get stressed quite easily so I’m really trying to stay on top of everything while I’m here and have a clear idea of what’s happening when I’m home. We also decided which videos everyone would be doing which was really good as there was a lot of confusion over who was doing what.

I had collated footage from two of the places I had decided to do the videos on but there was too I was yet to do. One being Shoreditch which I had gone to before but hadn’t really videoed two much and also hadn’t been to that many of the events they had on offer. The other being OXO tower I hadn’t visited but really wanted to go to the book swap and had heard good things. Not many people had put their name down for it so I thought it would be nice to do something different.

So after the studio session I caught the bus by myself to Shoreditch to have a look around and collect some footage. Most of the others doing the Shoreditch video thought they had enough and I thought a little bit of alone time would be nice so i was happy to go by myself. I first visited Bold which is an exhibition showcasing established and emerging Indian designers. The design was all influenced by culture such as Bollywood, culture traits and women’s issues in their society. It was a small but cool exhibition. I had the place to myself so I spent a while videoing and taking in the place. I had originally thought that everything was one designer and it took me a while to actually pick up on how different everything actually was. I fell in love with this beautiful big poster that said ‘BOLD’ and was made out of cut out detail and pattern on paper.

I then did a short walk to see the CitizenM Shoreditch Playground. I love colour and bright, out there thing but this honestly didn’t do it for me. I thought the concept was creating a more modern, aesthetic playground that was still functional for kids to use and have fun with. However, it was fenced off with rope so it seemed I could only look and not touch. I really appreciate interactive design and find getting to be involved and use your senses means you take a lot more out of something so found the playground not that exciting. (added note: I posted a picture saying I wish I could have played on it to my Instagram and the artist commenting telling me you can! So maybe it was just my mistake.)

Went that afternoon to Hampstead to say goodbye to my beautiful best friend. It was pretty emotional but I didn’t even think I’d get to see her so I was feeling more grateful than anything. She’s off to Munich but I’ll see her in December when she’s home.

We had the UAL gallery event that night. It had some cool concepts and I met some interesting people in the industry. We didn’t stay too long but it was nice to meet some new people. One man said he was going to auction himself off and invited us to come watch. It sounded really interesting so we were intrigued and watched but it turned out to be incredibly boring. You could barely hear what he was saying and there was more of a focus on what he admired in business strategy rather than the “sell yourself concept”.

All of us went for dinner at Nandos which was nice because its rare the whole group is together in a non-study environment. We obviously had to sit at different tables but it was still cute and fun. Then some went home for the night and Anna, Lisa, Cortney, Molly Alana and I went to a really funky bar quite close to the Ibis. It had a treehouse and really cool vibes. It was nice to have a few drinks and get to know everyone better.

The Sequel - 781

Truth To Power

André Schürrle, Juan Mata, other Chelsea players, and random awesome OC’s

(okay they’re less random now but they’re still pretty awesome)

original epic tale

all chapters of The Sequel

Spending 6 hours touring the Natural History Museum and visiting the London Film Museum to see the Bond cars exhibition with the whole family was a good way to recover from Wednesday night’s emotional diarrhea. Taking Lukas on any all-day outing was always a production that left little time for personal reflection. Christina was glad she didn’t have any opportunity to start picking through all that was said about her relationships with three of the four top guys in her life, and really enjoyed showing the fourth guy all kinds of cool things. He was just getting into dinosaurs, and he liked the Stegosaurus skeleton. The one on display in London happened to be the most complete ever found, and even if Lukas couldn’t put together that what he was looking at were the bones of the creature he had in stuffed and plastic form, he still found the staged skeleton captivating.

The whole experience of being in the crowded museum was fun and interesting and new for him. There were lots of little people around, which made it different from just walking around a busy store. There was no hurry. And Mommy, Daddy, Gran Ma, and Papa were all there to pick him up and show him things, or hold his hand so he could wander about and pick what to look at, or come over and look at whatever he wanted to show them. André found an “Investigate Center” near the bug exhibits, where everybody could pick up artifacts and check them out up close. The whole experience was a lot different to what the littlest Schürrle was used to in terms of going out to public places. Usually he was pushed or carried around while adults took care of errands or just getting from A to B. He was almost confused at first that they were there for him to have fun, and that he could do so much of his own walking. He liked the mammals exhibits best, with the big taxidermied animals he could name and identify, and some he’d never seen before. His mom liked the animal photography exhibit. Dad was into anything and everything to do with Earth, like the rocks and minerals displays. The grandparents were into feeling like grandparents. They took a million photos and virtually none of them were of the museum’s artifacts or recreations.

Lukas was pretty into cars, or anything with wheels, so he liked the Film Museum too even without any understanding of the significance of the cars used in the various James Bond movies. His parents enjoyed that aspect more. Christina took a lot of pictures there and her kid wasn’t in any of them. She also enjoyed the cappuccino she had when they stopped at a little cafe for a snack break, but it completely ruined her plan to nap they got home. Lukas went straight to sleep and André was ready to lie down, watch TV, and probably pass out. Christina wanted to rest a little too and then go squeeze in a few horses before the very late dinner reservation.

“May I read on you?” she asked her partner after giving up on the nap and getting herself some juice instead. She returned to the couch armed with the biography of Ernst Kantorowicz, a historian of medieval kings and their body politic. It was a study written by another medieval historian, who credits Kantorowicz, who began his career as a militant German nationalist in World War I and then sought safety in leftist-academia first in Oxford and then California, as the “most influential” medieval historian of all time. Christina wasn’t interested in that so much as she was in Kantorowicz’s evolution from right to left- from an outspoken and proud nationalist to the kind of person who stood up against a communism-fear-obsessed era loyalty oath tabled by his employer, the University of California, in 1949. He said, “This is the way it begins. The first oath is so gentle that one can scarcely notice anything at which to take exception. The next oath is stronger!” He said resistance must begin with the first oath because it was a “typical expedient of demagogues to bring the most loyal citizens, and only the loyal ones, into a conflict of conscience by branding nonconformists as un-Athenian, un-English, un-German.” The rider wanted to know how he got there from once writing that “since the dawn of time,” true loyalty had been possible only for Germans.

She wanted to know if it was through his study of kings, their politics, their realities, and the myth that worked its way into their legacies, or if it was more about his own experiences in life. He sounded like an interesting guy. The proprietor at her favorite independent bookshop recommended it to her when she stopped in to look for Christmas gifts. Things like that- like having a bookstore hookup who knew what she liked to read and could point her toward non-obvious books that could tickle her fancy- were among the reasons she still hated the idea of having to move away from London. Christina liked having ties to strangers since she didn’t have a lot of ties to family or even friends. She was going to miss her shopping consultant too, and the guy at Audi who made sure the techs were careful and mindful of all the non-original and very expensive parts on her R8 when she took it in to be serviced.

“Isn’t the TV going to bother you?” André asked. His girl shook her head so he turned from his side onto his back, unsure of exactly where she intended to read on him. Sometimes she liked to sit sideways across his lap so that she could lean over on his upper body, but he didn’t feel like being sat on so he remained relatively flat in his corner. Christina just stretched out on her back too and used his stomach as a pillow for her head. She tossed a blanket to cover her feet and wished Spencer and Lucky were around to sit with her. She could hold the heavy book with one hand and pet with the other, but they were at the barn. André was fine with only having her to pet. He finger combed her hair out across his waist.

He did spend a bit of his Thursday thinking about his Wednesday night. Watching Lukas look at stuff and either smile, turn pensive, or look like he could care less was only entertaining for so long. He thought about how relieved he felt to have a clear plan. André liked plans. Problems didn’t scare him if he could make a plan for fixing them. He believed eliminating some of the conflict within Christina by taking away boundaries could help her focus more on getting the best from Dirk, and that seeing some success there would make her feel whole and happy again, and that if she were whole and happy then all the other issues and questions she listed would shrink back into the shadows where they used to exist and where she was capable of ignoring them, or at least not let them consume her. He also felt good knowing he finally had the whole picture. His wife kept a lot of things inside that could have prevented some of their fights or difficult talks. He would have responded to things differently if he had the full context. So it looked to him like they were in for less of those fights and difficult talks going forward. He fell asleep untroubled and feeling positive, and Christina was actually able to focus on her book. She only had to read each paragraph once. The author’s voice and style were easy on the eyes and ears. Only when Isandro’s prodding texts went from “when are you coming?” to “can you please ride soon so I can go home?” did she put the book down and get up to get changed.

“Do you want me to go with you?” André yawned. He woke up when she tried to stealthily kiss him goodbye.

“No but I would like you to go shave your face.”

“I wiiiiiill. I’m going to shower and shave while you’re getting ready later.”

“Nuhuh then you’re gonna make it steamy and humid in the bathroom and it’ll ruin my hair.”

“Fine.”

“Go do it now so you can play with Luke when he gets up, which should be soon or he’ll never go to bed tonight. He said he wants to build with you, remember?” Christina poked at the player’s right bicep, in part because she was afraid he was going to go back to sleep but mostly because she just felt like it. What she didn’t really feel like doing was leaving. There was nothing inside averse to riding. There was just a lot inside in favor of staying within poking distance. If she wasn’t already in the love bubble because of everything that was said between them the night before, spending the day watching him do Dad Things would have shoved her into the bubble anyway. Even when he did things she hated, like hold Lukas right up to the museum glass and let him put his hands all over it, he was still the cutest dad and the most fun person with whom to co-parent.

“He wants to build a pyramid because he saw the Egyptian stuff at the museum.”

“So build a pyramid with him. If they could do it 3000 years ago without science, math, and machinery, I think you can manage one with some wood blocks.”

“I wasn’t suggesting that I couldn’t. How many horses are you riding?” André took possession of her poking finger- not to end the poking but just to hang onto it, kind of like Lukas did when he was bored and there was nothing else good to play with.

“Just two. I won’t be long.”

“Are you going to wear something pretty tonight, or beautiful, or sexy?”

“I dunno. Which would you prefer?” Christina lay back down again, on her tummy. Her plan to make sure he got up was not only not working but also sort of reversing on itself.

“Don’t be too sexy or I’ll think too much about coming home to enjoy the food. Wear a nice dress, and straighten your hair,” the player suggested, reaching to gently tug a few of her locks between his middle and pointer fingers. “And do the makeup like you did for Juan’s party. I liked that.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You looked...so awake, and alive, and...beautiful, with the dark eyes,” he said quietly, his own set of blues still on the hair in his fingers. “Or you’re just happier being around him and his family. You’re...irresistibly beautiful when you’re happy, pretty girl.” I don’t want it to be that. He was a little sad from thinking about that night. He didn’t really look at her until she was all-over radiant, having slipped into her natural element at the table- charming people, and delighting in random conversation, and laughing, and smiling, and laughing and smiling entirely in her grayed eyes. Before that his only thought about her face was that she shouldn’t have had to bring supplies to do a whole makeover in the car for dinner. Dinner at Juan’s wasn’t supposed to warrant that much effort, or that much blending of eye shadows.  

“No, you were right the first time. I need pounds of makeup to look happy these days,” Christina quipped as she prepared to get up again.

“That is not what I was saying. Don’t be like this,” André urged, recognizing he’d really stepped in it. “You put on makeup to look extra pretty. I can’t say that it works? And that I like it?”

“You don’t get it. I was being sarcastic.” The rider shook her head once she got to her feet, but let him succeed in reaching out for her hand to stop her from leaving. He looks so confused. I’m not complaining that he thinks I look better with makeup than without. I’m complaining that he’s only attracted to me when I’m happy. I hate that. In sickness and in health. You’re supposed to feel the same about your spouse no matter what. Juanin is the same no matter whether I’m happy or miserable. Even Marco once told me I look gorgeous when I’m depressed. Granted, he was drunk and then kissed the side of my face in the weirdest way I’ve ever experienced.

“Then why are you mad at me?”

“I’m not. Can I go, please? If I don’t get moving then I don’t have enough time to put the makeup on so that I look happy for you.”

“Chris. Stop. Explain it to me if I don’t get it.” André was tired of being blamed for not understanding things she made no effort to help him understand- things she seemed to deliberately withhold the pertinent facts and background about. He tried to be calm though. “Isn’t it easier to talk to me than it is to get all upset?”

“Why do you only find me irresistible or whatever when I’m happy?”

“I feel something inside when you smile and it’s real, and when you smile just in your eyes,” he shrugged. How is this a problem, he wondered, still confused. “I didn’t say the word “only”. You added that. It’s not like I think you’re ugly when you’re down. I can’t appreciate when you feel good? Would you...like...rather I find you the most sexy when you look like you haven’t slept in a month and want to disappear from the world? I should hope for that so I get to see it? You don’t make any sense.”

“I just- When you’re unhappy a lot and the person you love most is constantly reminding you how much more he likes you when you’re happier, it’s like extra pressure to...get happy. I’m trying,” Christina relented. She appeared more sad to him than angry, which he considered a strange form of progress in the exchange. Being duly sad was better, he thought, than angry for no good reason.

“I’m sorry,” he told her. “I don’t mean it that way. I was just trying to tell you how beautiful you looked the other night.”

“Okay. Whatever. Let’s forget it. I need to go change.”

“Kiss.”

She bent down to get a little peck on the lips and then somewhat hurried to vacate the area before anything else could come up. The footballer rubbed his face and turned over onto his right side, curling up in the process. The prior conversation was a reminder that having a plan to make things better didn’t actually make things better, at least not yet. His girl was never as assured about the whole having a plan thing as he was. She was, by nature, more skeptical and less inclined to believe that which she couldn’t see or touch. Having a plan to fix things was a reassuring relief to him and just a small source of hope to her. Real things were more significant for her. Having a definitive answer on the moving agenda, for example, was a real thing. Knowing she didn’t have to live in the apartment was a real thing that relieved some stress. Knowing and actually believing that she didn’t have to fight any Juan urges, at least from an André-perspective, helped a little too. That meant she could stop worrying why she was willing to indulge herself in ways that hurt him, because it didn’t actually hurt him. That took away Juan’s ability to make her question it and suffer from the subsequent doubt about her relationships with them. She was about specifics and details that way, and she was apprehensive and cynical, so it hurt her less when a speed bump cropped up in the “having a plan” process. To her husband, a speed bump like the one he experienced after his nap was a discouragement instead of an anticipated event.

I guess the reason she doesn’t want to tell me everything is that she knows she reacts badly to hard truths and then assumes I will too. I was just trying to tell her how good she looked the other night, and to ask her if it was because she enjoyed being with Juan and his family. It would have been okay if she said yes, he thought while staring at the TV. Obviously I wish she could fit into my family as well as she fits into that one, and connect with my mom the way she does with Juan’s, but it would have been okay. I wouldn’t get angry with her, or make a fight out of it. She makes a thing out of hearing the truth, though. Obviously she thinks everyone else will too. I didn’t say she looks bad, otherwise. Just like I’m not saying now that she doesn’t like my parents or doesn’t get along with them. They have a good relationship too. It’s just different. This is going to get hard again when I leave next week. At least during camp I have a lot of down time and I can use it to talk to her a lot. But I hope they finish the damn house soon. If I harass Marco about it every day in Marbella, will he harass Zoe to harass the contractors?

A month ago or so I said I would post my thoughts on the GG revival (and some other stuff) once my finals were done. But then I went home for the holidays, and my Internet access was not great. Here at last are the GG thoughts, though they're long and not well-organized and generally critical of the revival, if anyone's interested.

My feelings about the Gilmore Girls revival: all the Gilmores deserved better

Lorelai by far had the best arc for me in the revival. While I soured on Luke a while ago and found him frustrating throughout, Lorelai’s individual story was (excluding the conclusion) the best part. Since Richard and Sookie had outside reasons to not appear, the show made an excellent decision to focus on Michel and Lorelai’s relationship. While I haven’t always appreciated what Michel brings, I do now because the storyline brought out the best in both of them. It revealed Michel’s softer side for longer periods while focusing on Lorelai’s willingness to do whatever to keep him around (also the secret club scene with them both was fantastic).

I was immensely frustrated by the plot in which Richard left money to Luke to franchise and nothing for Lorelai’s career goals. I get that Richard wasn’t always progressive, and can even appreciate the callback to the season 5 Richard/Luke outing, but it was a complete disservice that he wouldn’t leave his daughter money to further her career. Richard mentioned in Bon Voyage how much credit Lorelai deserved for what she had built, and even before then spoke with praise about her inn. In Bon Voyage, Emily kept expressing a desire to build the Dragonfly a spa with Lorelai. Are you telling me that Richard wouldn’t have offered to finance that, or maybe he and Emily would decide to set aside the money for when Lorelai might be more open to it? I get that would have robbed the tension of Michel maybe leaving, or the Luke-Lorelai tension, or the beautiful parallel at the end asking for the loan- but there are other ways they could have achieved all that while giving Richard and Lorelai’s relationship its due. (As sweet as the mall story was, it was very nonsensical and even the outstanding acting couldn’t save it for me. Imagine though if Richard had financed an expansion at the Dragonfly and Emily was working there and she felt like Lorelai didn’t appreciate his gifts enough? But still she stayed working there.)

Also, setting aside the pain I get every time a show attempts therapy sessions, there was all this build up in the first episode to it and then it just fizzled? We didn’t get nearly enough Emily (let alone Emily-Lorelai) after it was done, and its conclusion made the whole storyline seem wasted. (Also… ew Luke. Don’t give Lorelai crap for going to therapy.) And then the therapist tries to be in the musical? Which… I didn’t mind some Bunheads cameos and the musical itself was fine, but (as I know many others have said) the musical was wasted time. They could have done Sutton as the director, Lorelai as the lead, and Lorelai keeps struggling with this one song at the end (the only poignant part of that storyline) until she realizes her emotional block with it. At least then the storyline includes Lorelai as a participant.

Meanwhile, the hiking thing was so bizarre. We did not need an extended Wild reference (or whatever the name is). It had some funny parts (book or movie), and I enjoyed the Parenthood cameos, but it felt so inauthentic. Why not have Lorelai go on a hotel road trip (with Michel maybe?), and even parallel it with Rory’s adventure in the episode before? It also parallels the running away from her marriage to Max, and makes it even more potent when she comes back. Or, she could go see Sookie (maybe not even realizing that’s where she’s heading at first) and ask why she left, and get closure on that. Then get a promise from Sookie that she’ll be at the wedding, or that she’ll come back soon (or she won’t). Same amount of scenes as we got with Sookie, a whole lot more substantive than the hiking.

Quick point: they completely underplayed the Lorelai/Paris relationship. When Luke asked just how close Lorelai and Paris were and Lorelai was dumbfounded by Paris’ kindness to her, it was so bizarre. Lorelai and Paris’ interactions used to be phenomenal. I will say, at least they gave us some more Paris/Rory/Lane- Rory with both her best friends is premium content. And Paris’ job was perfect.

Then there’s Rory’s storyline. One, if you’re going to tease Tristan, then just pay CMM the money to make a split-second appearance. Otherwise don’t mention him. Just the running into Francie would have been effective to send Paris into a meltdown, or showing me some dang Madeleine and Louise. OR BRAD! But about her actual career:

In the beginning of season 2, Rory wrote an article that according to the Chilton paper faculty advisor made the parking lot repavement eventful. It’s one thing to talk about Rory having a hard time finding jobs, and another to talk about writer’s block, but it’s something entirely different to tell me Rory can’t find any angle about lines in New York City. It would have actually been more effective to have Rory write something, submit it, and then be told it wasn’t the right direction for the paper, and she could meltdown after that if need be. I get why she didn’t want to do the memoir with the batty Brit in the end. While I don’t see why she feasibly wouldn’t do any research into the fledgling Huff-Po rip-off, I can see her going in there and being confused when she’s expected to pitch a position after they were chasing her. With teaching, I know other people have said that she acted like it was beneath her. That wasn’t my interpretation- she finished school and even if that’s where she’s always excelled that doesn’t mean she wants to go back for the Masters she would need. We don’t know if continuing school’s a good financial situation for her (would Chris pay? Emily? would Rory still be comfortable asking?) and Rory probably decided teaching wasn’t for her a long time ago (just because she liked school doesn’t mean she likes kids in high-school- Not as Cute as Pushkin comes to mind). Also, it would probably feel like failure to her, not because teaching is somehow lesser but because it would mean she couldn’t hack it as a journalist in her own mind.

I was hoping she would stick with the Stars Hollow Gazette, and make it ‘great’ again (sorry for the organization of this sentence). Or if not that, maybe it could get her noticed- she could get a book deal about this small town and telling people about it (rather than a memoir her mom resents). I have… iffy feelings about stories within stories. In many of my favorite pieces of fiction (Glee and Gossip Girl and Queer as Folk, amongst others), the “writer” in the group eventually creates a self-reflective piece. Last fall, I started watching Jane the Virgin. Spoiler alert, but Jane decides to write a book about her grandma (which her grandmother is initially against). But Jane is a romance novelist, who is going to fictionalize the romance of her grandmother and grandfather, and their immigration story, to play to her own skills as a writer. Instead of Rory focusing on just her family, she could have done character pieces and interviews with the many denizens of Stars Hollow. After the Life and Death Brigade in the third episode, I was thinking she could expand on her Yale piece in some way- fictionalized or documenting elite social organizations in Connecticut or on college campuses. Rory has so many other unique interests (she could have done travel-journal too, since she’s jetting back and forth between London, or a giant ‘pop culture references as taught to me by my mother’ guide) and I wish the story had been about her telling those rather than the story we already know- be more creative and trust the audience!

I love Logan and I love Rory and I love them together but I don’t have very many thoughts on the romantic storylines, even the baby. Except, Rory should have broken up with Paul at the end of the first episode. If they wanted to drag out the damn thing, it would have been funny if they showed her breaking it off but she kept thinking she hadn’t. Otherwise, that whole thing was just too mean.

Also, Rory-Emily did not have nearly enough together this time around. I realize Rory was doing a lot of travelling and it was maybe hard for her to see Emily, but it was disappointing. Emily on the whole was disconnected with her family and aside from the one phone call where (best part of Rory’s stuff) Rory got into Richard’s study, it was especially evident with those two. (Also, finally some Rory-Richard content!)

Then, Emily as an individual. I know a lot of people loved her parts and think she’s the one the writers did the most justice by. I disagree. Emily spent years having to justify that her life was valid and fulfilling to Richard and Lorelai both, and then the writers had her act like it wasn’t at all. I understand that part of her justification in her life was that it furthered Richard’s business, and that even without that, Richard’s death could have just resulted in the reorganization of priorities that we saw. But we didn’t need her to find a lover or see her burn all her high-society bridges when it happened. She could have moved into a fancy apartment or townhouse in Hartford, hired a permanent maid whose life she was overly-invested in, and struggled finding a new place in society as a widow but ultimately figured it out. I loved that she decided to work at that museum, and it was fun, but imagine if she had done an art museum or history museum in Hartford? She took pride in being Emily Gilmore, dangit. In fact, back to the maid, remember how Lorelai always said Emily stifled her? What if Emily hired a girl remarkably like young Lorelai and Lorelai felt like Emily was trying to substitute her with this girl in light of her realized mortality? That’s a more genuine conflict than Lorelai gaffing at Richard’s funeral.

I didn’t hate it, but the four episodes felt silly and struggled to fill the arcs with meaningful content. I would much prefer an 8 or 10- episode season (with 45-60 min running times). I was disappointed with the majority of AYITL, but perhaps my expectations were too high. At least I got quality Logan-Rory content, and quality Lorelai-Michel and Paris.