there's something so comforting about artists you admire talking about their own struggles and insecurities

rrhghrghghhhh OFF is such a masterpiece aesthetically like yeah i like the story but it's the overall aesthetic that just hits different. the scanned pencil sketches with pixel outlines that make them pop out that much more, the sparse color palette used to differentiate areas from one another and highlight the things that matter, scans of old books to give an uncomfortable real-world tie in to the bizarre little game, the specter designs, the language and phrasing of the dialogue, the goddamn OST that gets atmospheric and terrifying and calming and unnerving. im going to go feral over this and im not sorry

"nanobots" the song is this deconstructed view of child development and parenthood where it's like, 'wow have you ever thought about how weird producing offspring is. like, it's weird, right! we make these little people and they quickly grow into their own individual personalities with their own lives and autonomy and I've lost all authority and there's so many and you've gotta be responsible for them all the time, what did I do !!!'

but as well as approaching it with this slightly overwhelmed perspective, there's a sort of affectionate optimism in there, too. that even tho the concept's intimidating, there's a sense of wonder in how humans develop and raising them and watching them grow up. hey this kid thing's fun actually, yeah I wish they'd leave me alone sometimes, but look at how cute and resilient they are look at what they can do. and then "replicant" is like jesus parenting a teenager is hard.

Recently for a few months, ive been having dreams about going out and getting food. Just leaving my house and often the food in question im looking for is cake. But i usually can never find or get what i am looking for and I wake up hungry!

So yesterday my sister took me out to the store and I realized I was no only an adult man, my abuser absent at home and also I had a gift card with 13 dollars on it...

Maybe life CAN be dream,,,

at the risk of sounding butthurt for talking about not being butthurt: going through quals really prepared me for trawling through fandom meta and research while keeping my zen

Osamu Dazai and the Depressing Era

ofmd nails the “it’s not really helpful to think of the world in terms of good and bad people, but rather in terms of good and bad choices” vibe and every single day i am grateful for it

There’s something to be said about how your parents & elderly care are not your responsibility, especially with late stage capitalism getting worse & making taking big breaks out of your life less realistic financially. We need better elderly care, a better system, & we need to let go of this mentality that our parents are our responsibility all at the same time. We are our only responsibilities, but fuck capitalism all at the same time!

tgcf art is fun bc xl generally looks really nice and hc generally looks really mean. they just. complement each other lol. that's true love

I'm thinking again on the fact that so often comments, criticism and readings on Jack dwell a lot on how he is barely human/a person/doesn't have a personality at the point of the story and, while I somewhat understand these points, I find them so lacking. I find them... ableist? I'm always doubtful to use the word here because I'm not sure if it's applied in this kind (mental health) of context, but something like that. And I find them extremely simplistic.

However, honestly, a big part of the reason for these readings being so popular is that the manga itself words it that way. But that's one of the problems I find in the manga. When I say P.andora Hear.ts is very good but unfortunately it is very manga-like at times, besides the 2000s homojokes and the like, I'm usually thinking about things like this. I feel like often characters and situations that are (potentially) very intricate instead of getting insightful deep overviews often get screwed by the writing itself, which falls into very manga tropes a lot in a bad way (not that every manga has to fall into them, or that every manga trope has to be bad or written badly).

I don't know... For instance, I'd argue R.askolnikov's capacity for love in Cr.ime and Punishmen.t is debatable, but it's never treated as if it made him less of a person, a human being or made him not have a personality. I'd say not even Svidrigailo.v, who is as much a Bad Guy™ as a character can be, gets that treatment by the writing. I'd say that even him or Mikol.ka are written as fully fleshed human beings with their intricate internal lives and feelings. Svidrig.ailov's last scene with D.unya is fascinating for both characters and spins the whole dynamic and makes you question the entire narrative and veracity of not only those two characters, but brings to mind several other conversations among different characters and throws light (and doubt!) on the main plot between R.askolnikov and Porf.iry.

In similar situations, Jack's humanity, personhood and personality are debated, doubted and even full on accepted as vanished. No one reads Crim.e and Punishmen.t and comes to the same conclusions about Raskolni.kov, Svidrig.ailov, Sony.a or Razu.mikhin. The writing doesn't allow it. The writing doesn't allow you to forget that humanity is diverse and multifaceted, that it can be sad and cruel and loving and monstrous, even all at the same time, or that a person may struggle with feeling at all; and one is still a person.

something else i looove about kakegurui is how yumeko is so hard to understand and she seems enigmatic and like, to a degree almost lacking character. she seems like that to the reader and to everyone else. but once you're several arcs in the little hints and singular moments of previous arcs start to come together and a lot more about her is apparent, you start to understand her. well enough, even, to understand how many of the characters looking at her, thinking they understand, are wrong about her.

and all of this has improved further with the recent flashbacks, and im assuming this revealing of yumeko will only continue, and its great. i love the slowness of letting us into knowing her--that nothing has been in her pov. it's great.

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guess if im gonna use tumblr again, i should stop being lazy and actually start tagging things

Babey feed us more art or 🔫🔫🔫🔫😡

DON'T WORRY DY IM COMING BACK TO SERVE SOME ART TO YOU BEBS. I ALREADY GOT LIKE 4 OR 5 THINGS COOKING UP!! IVE ALSO BEEN BUSY BUT I'LL GET TO IT!!

I hate that i wanna write so badly but i fucking hate every sentence I write

I don’t want a fionna and cake series. Please hbo just let this show have a narratively satisfying end pleaaase. The ending of adventure time was so good and such a good sendoff and it only WORKS if it’s an actual ending, it only works if we’re actually saying goodbye. Literally the whole message of the finale was that sometimes you have to let things end and accept that things will never be how they were, and that there’s beauty in that acceptance because no matter what changes it doesn’t erase what you had. You cannot literally have that be the entire THESIS of the last three or four seasons and then keep drawing it out for cash and nostalgia