#even as it kills me inside | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

gentil-minou · 1 year

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no thoughts* head empty just demon lord bai lu

*avoiding the thoughts because wow ouch pain angst ouch pain

#im excited to get back to our poor little meow meow and the main storyline but oooof ive been loving this arc #even as it kills me inside #till the end of the moon #back to my roots of waking up stupid early to watch new episodes weeee

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blackkatdraws2 · 2 months

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Clusterhug [Blank Scripts AU]

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krasytoonz · 9 months

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Strawberry Ice Cream Soda-Pop or something like That!

#I love how Barnaby sounds EXACTLY like how I imagined him to Sound! And Howdy’s voice too! It’s so so Great!#and their Interactions.. OH MAN! I CANT believe I would say this But I ship them EVEN MORE #Everytime I replay that Audio of Howdy and Barnaby talking about Family and all I just think to Myself ‘they’re such a Lovely Duo’#and then Howdy says something About meeting Barnaby’s mom and I just Ascended to Nirvana because you see #It’s Him meeting his Mother in Law and in my Head they’re Married #AND IT’S KILLING ME INSIDE BECAUSE I KNOW ITS ALL PLATONIC BUT I CAN’T HELP BUT SHIP THEM MORE NOW #LIKE THE CHEMISTRY IS DJKSMSMXMX LETS JUST ADMIT IT THEYRE CUTE TOGETHER #welcome home puppet show #welcome home #barnaby x howdy #howdy x barnaby #beaglepillar #laughingstock #welcome home fanart #welcome home arg #welcome home project #fanart #barnaby b beagle #barnaby b. beagle #krasytoonz #barnaby Beagle #wally darling #welcome home barnaby #welcome home howdy #welcome home Wally #my beloved OTP they ARE SO SO SO CUTE

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omegalomania · 1 year

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sending postcards from a plane crash (wish you were here), 2003 // the kintsugi kid (ten years), 2023

#fall out boy #fob #so much (for) stardust #take this to your grave #*mine #*edits #id in the alt text #im not v good at lyric edits but im so messed up about this parallel rn #gold. copper. kintsugi kid.#like...hating your insides and wanting them to be prettier #and 20 years later you can say my insides aren't what they're supposed to be. and that's a good thing actually.#theres just so much i want to SAY about that. it kills me. desecrates me even.#the GOLD. the KINTSUGI. I NEED TO LIE DOWNNNN.

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caligvlasaqvarivm · 27 days

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I know you dont care about pesterquest but i wanna know, did you think they wrote eridan well or bad?

bad

#why would he care about shrek hes a hipster #also he cant just casually waltz into a movie theater hed scare the shit out of everyone there #like everyone else on alternia automatically assumes a sea dweller is going to want to kill you #eridans never done anything casually before in his life #even GAMZEE's internal narration goes 'better not stand on the beach for too long #if a sea dweller sees me theyll attack lol'#i know hes been memed to hell and back because hes a pathetic little meow meow but like #objectively eridan was fucking terrifying by alternian standards #even if he isn't actually like that inside he still LOOKED and ACTED the part #and also he did do all those murders yeah #like so many murders #like 'killin is all i evver done practically' levels of murders #vriska says her bodycount is in the 'many thousands' so eridan's deffo up there too #hes like objectively dangerous and scary #and the fact that the team forgot about this when it came to dealing with him pretty famously had disastrous results #anyway heres my eridancore movie rec: Once (2007)#i know 'hipster actually likes mainstream stuff' is a Trope and theres truth to it but like look at me in the eyes #do you really mean to tell me eridan “wizard and magic are stupid and fake but i have 6 wizard statues in my room” ampora #is going to be the hipster that admits that he likes mainstream stuff

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satans-knitwear · 4 months

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Smooching u 😘

Treat me ~ Tip Me ~ More of me

#A very delicious vibe indeed #Send me asks! Keep me entertained this evening #I just had to kill b*de again so I'm broken inside 😭#satans knitwear #Any tips or treats would be massively appreciated right now 🥰#bi girl #cheeky #uk girl #wlw #alt pinup #pinup girl #pretty lingerie #Oversized shirt and lingerie #Flannel and lingerie #Stockings and suspenders

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skyscrapergods · 3 months

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Every time you drop new lore I get a new idea that I can't figure out how/have the motivation to craft a full story out of lmao

Been thinking about those people asking if Cellie or Luna would notice if somepony lands on them, and I couldn't help but thinking about a pony escaping some sort of abusive situation and flying to the one place they couldn't imagine anypony following them- a goddess.

Would the goddess care? I imagine Luna most definitely would, but Celestia? Maybe, on a sort of vague level, in that she cares about the well being of all creatures. Or maybe she would on a much deeper level than anticipated, seeing as she knows all too well what comes from that sort of thing.

Just wanted to stop by to say thank you for the brain food, I just adore how your universe is coming along! Your worldbuilding is exquisite.

Celestia would not notice you for a while. She may get a vague sense of someone seeking sanctuary, so she would feel protective. If you stay more than a few sunsets she would realize your significance and check you out. She won't ask you about your day or anything, and caring about your story is a little difficult for her. But if your abuser shows up, well... They shouldn't have been so close to a goddess' feet.

The others would care much more, and want to know your whole story and give you comfort. Luna would protect your dreams, Cadance would protect you physically, and Twilight would connect you to a support network to help you get your life back and stay safe.

#alicorn lore #ssg celestia #ssg alicorns #ssg gods #yeah celestia gets over the whole 'killing people' thing eventually #even the most sensitive of insect lovers walk on grass #though I try not to #and when i'm moving something from the woods into my home or into water #i pick off all the bugs first so they will be ok #except ants #they get squished if i find them inside #outside i leave them alone #if an ant bites me i squish it but if a wasp or lacewing bites me i let them go #i dunno i guess even cosmic monsters have a threshhold of what we care about

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thejasontoddarchives · 8 months

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There’s a general consensus that above all else Jason should be homicidal again. However I think what’s also very important is that he should be a fucking hoot.

There’s nothing not funny about this entire bit.

1. He couldn’t give less of a shit about explaining that he’s single-handedly trying to stop a terrorist attack. Obviously cause he’s short on time, but even if he had all the time in the world he would still be this indifferent towards explaining himself to cops.

2. This bomb is seconds away from exploding but he’s at most mildly annoyed like he’s in the office doing some menial task.

3. The perfectly timed British jokes.

4. Circling back to number 1 on the list. After he throws the bomb into the water he just dips. For all they know he’s the (weird) terrorist. (But as long as everyone’s okay he doesn’t care! The beauty of Jason Todd everybody).

This one is funny (but it’s also true)? Like yes … that is exactly what you are. (A sweet, kind-hearted goodboy learning how to effectively poison people, shoot guns, and blow shit up with all manner of explosives like a certified pro).

Bonus:

Red Hood: The Lost Days #5 (2010-)

Red Hood: The Lost Days #4 (2010-)

“Not so irritating for an American” is a far more impressive title than “genius” if you ask me. Although I think Jason balances both pretty well.

#lost days was actually a comedy it gets funnier every time I reread it #look I know in recent days he’s become more serious/glum as a character #he’s sorta detached from people and situations and he seems to have lost his spunk #and my mind is zoning in on Zdarsky. him feeling immense guilt and burden over people he kills.#which like. even Matt Murdock fans said Zdarsky leaned a bit too heavily into Catholic guilt lol #Jason should be like this again #boiling inside him is untamed rage and pain and hurt but the jokes keep rolling off his tongue in an endless stream #just as playful with his words as he is with his bombs and takeover plans #from moments like the bomb under the bridge or even just the 'nice boy' comment #you see just how much he not only doesn’t care about being labelled a hero for his actions but how he actively detests it even #it’s one of the things that makes him so endearing to me like: look at this humble kind kid who loves and cares for the world immeasurably #(even after all he’s suffered from it)#but refuses to ever take credit for it #jason todd #red hood #red hood: the lost days #lost days #dc

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clowndensation · 11 months

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there’s a question to be asked i think about to what extent “getting out” can be conflated with “being saved” in this show, and what freedom actually means to any of these characters.

like you can argue that shiv saved ken by voting against him on gojo, but what if your intent behind saving someone is to inflict a worse punishment than if you’d just left them trapped? can a child weaned on poison survive on milk, or are you just sentencing them to a death by inches, starved of the only thing they know? and if you save someone specifically because you know that being saved is the worst thing that can happen to them, is that kindness or cruelty? at what point does a good thing become a malicious act?

and you can say that roman is finally free, but what exactly is he free from? the company? his father? does unlocking a cage mean saving a dog, or are you allowing him out on the street knowing there’s a kill shelter nearby? if the driving anxiety behind roman is that he’s an idiot and a failure—that he’ll never amount to anything, and trying will only lead to pain—and he’s finally cut loose once all of those anxieties have crystallized into cold hard fact in his mind, what has he actually escaped from? if the cage is in your mind, is it even possible for somebody else to unlock it?

the fundamental truth of a tragedy is that even being saved can be a death sentence, if the characters are incapable of escaping the thing doing them the most harm (themselves and their childhoods)

#'what about shiv' if i think about shiv i'm going to kill myself. she needs her own post. there's too much there to get into.#anyways seeing a tremendous amount of At Least Roman Is Free <3 tags that have me going. right. for sure. free from what?#because it's certainly not the intense amount of self disgust that has driven him in circles this entire time.#i fear he may feel the weight of alienation on his soul for the rest of his life. and he won't even try to alleviate it anymore.#and ALSO the idea that shiv went out of her way to save kendall as an act of like. altruism. like it was a sacrifice on her part #which i feel is a very toothless perspective on shiv and the psychological torment that's been weighing on her essentially since birth #like her choice in regards to gojo is one of the meatiest most harrowing bits of character work i've ever seen #and while of course there was love inside that action (because nothing these characters do is entirely divorced from love)#i don't think it was necessarily a kind or forgiving or sacrificial love #like this was an intense vitriolic snapping from a dog that has been kicked by her dad all her life.#and who absolutely refuses to accept that from her brother (because that would mean acknowledging that kendall takes the mantle of Dad-#and that she's subservient to him. which is the one thing she absolutely will never do #because it's a level of degradation that's finally a step too far)#anyways. um. insane season that i still can't look at directly or i'll perish on the spot.#succession

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eepyracc · 27 days

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Lnds fandom.. how are we feeling 🧍‍♀️

Because I for one, am absolutely losing it

#the lore drop was insane #where do i even begin #I NEED to know more about Zayne's research WHAT DID HE DISCOVER THAT MADE HIM STOP AND DESTROY EVERYTHING #THE JEREMIAH BACKSTORY???#Xavier sleeps inside the spaceship to feel a bit at home..#Ever group crumbs bwjdhwu #MC BEING EXPERIMENTED ON AS A KID CONFIRMED #altho she doesnt remember she suffered SO MUCH imagine toying with life like that #killing her over and over again without never truly being sure if she'd actually come back #so the aether protocore was DISCOVERED inside of her? not implemented in her heart #i need to understand how rafayels heart the aether core the core of philos and the creatio core are related #rafayel being offended that hes only ranked 6th made me giggle ngl #anyway brb imma cry some more #the fact that Philosians (??) need to take some potion? med? to stay alove cuz their bodies are wearing out im not okay #xavy baby dont die on me #and the fact that Ever group is spying on him though his comrades #and the fact that mc is on Ever's list or whatever #just wtf #lnds #xavier love and deepspace #zayne love and deepspace #rafayel love and deepspace

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prototypelq · 4 months

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Everything you ever heard about DRG community is true.

I have now been to multiple public (anyone could join) missions, where I started off alone, only to have another rando newbie (player rank like 7, so under 10 hours of playtime, same as me) come join, and, And a player with rank 179 (... let's say from the top of my head, around 100+ hours in the game) joined in to help us. I bet no loot from those missions even matter to those players, the rewards should be too little of use to them. They are just high-level players looking out for newbies and joining their games to help you learn the ropes. It's honestly amazing and super sweet.

It's also extremely fun to just hang around in the lobby with people. I have had several games where me and the team were celebrating our latest mission at the bar/dancefloor, only to then fall prey to engine failure and drop off the game entirely. I feel bad for ghosting those players like that, we did just spend 10 or more minutes doing funny dances together, but I don't regret that time spent together at all. DRG is really magical like that.

Rock and Stone, you beautiful dwarves!

#the rock and stone spam syndrome is real and inescapable #the game wouldn't be the same without it #i am really having an awesome time in here even if I quite usually end up confused #also i haven't even using the voice chat yet the ping system in the game works wonders for communication #though asking for the next stage of the mission is polite and i wish i had received more of those messages #oh well might be a regional issue for me #drg is great mutuals i would rock and stone for you #lootbugs my beloved i love u #every time a player kills a lootbug i die a little inside #also sish we could pet betsy the same way we can bet doretta #betsy deserves more love #i need to figure out how to mod the game without breaking the multiplayer to do that #drg #deep rock galactic #rock and stone!

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dawnssummers · 1 year

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— i never liked that ending either. more love streaming out the wrong way, and i don't want to be the kind that says the wrong way.

buffy the vampire slayer, 5.07 fool for love + 5.18 intervention + 5.22 the gift / richard siken, litany in which certain things are crossed out

#litany again. GUYS WHO WOULD LOVE LITANY IN WHICH CERTAIN THINGS ARE CROSSED OUT!!!#btvs #spike #btvsedit #no but litany is so. it's about being stuck in this narrative of doom/tragedy whilst trying to shape it from within but u Can't. you're you #it's about regret (especially that but i should've known) its about forgiving yrself (dear forgiveness quit milling about and come inside)#most of all it's about being the dragon and wanting to be the princess or the hero but you're not #and that's why you want a better story. WHO WOULDN'T? sure i sink the boat of love but that comes LATER #idk man what if u fell in love with ur destruction ie that which killed you the first time #what if you continued to life what if you were a vampire and there was a hero. what if u fell in love with ur destruction again #what if you were a fool for love even as you revelled in causing pain and causing destruction of your own #what IF you were trying to heal your lover but then the slayer was there. what if your lover pushed you away bc she knew your destiny #what if love for you was like a religion all along... litany makes me crazy wazy #^all why the expression RIGHT after 'til the end of the world' is in here i did oscillate on including it bc it Looks innocuous #so much converges there.. it's a grand statement And it's real And it's a (promise of) love through/bc of/despite the world ending

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faitherr · 13 days

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HAPPY APRIL 17TH!! ITS RIE DAY!!

It's Rie's birthday!! Only TWO cpu miis have official birth dates and she is one of them!!! that's what makes her so special !!!

She was the first mii cpu i drew on this blog too. i drew her when i first joined miiblr all the way back in october last year um what time goes so fast

So she does mean a lot to me haha

Anyways ^_^... happy birthday to the cutest mii of all 🩷

#my older rie drawing still gets notes im still grateful people like it but it kinda kills me inside a little when i see it again 🤧#anyways yeah!!! RIE DAY WOOHOO!!!#also even this doodle didnt have much effort sorry for the mess #miiblr #rie wii sports #mii #wii sports #wii

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cosmic--static · 3 months

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losing my mind over this line from my dark urge playthrough

#istyrr: im waking you up because theres an urge inside of me that is telling to kill you and i dont want to do that #astarion: i want to be inside you :(#this is insane to me because literally a few days ago i sent voide my angst idea for Istyrr coming to consciousness standing over astarion #with a knife pressed to his throat or a stake about to go into his chest #AND I LITERALLY PREDICTED IT??? EVEN THE “i have to be tied up so that i dont act upon the Urge” 😭#anyway. astarion romancers this ones for you 🫡#astarion #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion bg3 #bg3 astarion #astarion x tav #astarion/tav #cosmo talks

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pendragonsclotpole · 3 months

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years later and i’m still checking the rose tyler/the doctor tags on ao3 because they’ll always be one of my otps and no one can match up to their dynamic, shut up no i’m not biased because she was the first companion i met

#rose tyler in the 1960s episode lives rent free in my head #there is just something i adored about rose and the doctor #rose always felt like all she wanted was the acknowledgement and love of the doctor #but even if she never got it #she loved him so much #the french episode killed me a little on the inside and then i died completely when rose left #like nine and rose and ten and rose were it for me #doctor who #tenth doctor #ninth doctor #eleventh doctor #the doctor #rose tyler

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screwpinecaprice · 10 months

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I know it’s not a question but i can’t help but appreciate the fact that you draw adult Steven as a chubby guy! We big boys need some positive representation in here. Also, i’ve been following you for almost a year now!

Btw sorry for my English lol.

Hi! It's very pleasing to know you've been around for as long! 😁😁😁 I absolutely appreciate the appreciation! And no worries, your English is super fine! 😁 (Relatable actually. I am also apologizing in advance if I can't exactly have my point clearly across because I'm not well at English myself! lmao)

It took me quite some time to learn how to draw chubby characters but it's so satisfying to have eventually. ( *`u*) (I mean, there's still so much to learn, but still.)

Having a chubby main protagonist is so wonderful to have. And a good kid at that. (Ngl I'm attracted to kindness. haha So of course it's very important to me that he's fat AND kind.)

Also design-wise, I personally think it fits his character so well. Soft and huggable, shaped like a friend. Thick arms to hug people with snuggly. Body wide like a shield. etc. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

And I just really like to capture these elements when I draw him as an adult. Also that it's just fun to draw.

Simply personal thoughts about it, nothing against any other ways he's being portrayed by others of course.

#And it's not even because English isn't my first language. Just generally bad at language. RIP #I had this conversation with someone once where they headcanon he'd get lower back pains if he slim down because of how his gem will #poke or stab his spine #I really like that he's chubby/fat just because. and that he's happy and confident about it #but him being fat not entire by choice is an interesting angle to look at.#I mean obviously he's naturally chubby because of DNA too but you get when I mean. or I hope you do. ;u;#Yo I had a theory.... or at least a headcanon about how his gem is arranged inside his body and how it's practically designed so it can be #passed down eventually without killing him. But I never get to a cohesive written explanation about it so I kept procrastinating.#I like to think the Pink Diamond gem will become like an heirloom. But I digress.#Steven Quartz Universe #Connie Maheswaran #I guess implied connverse #connverse #TFW growing up in media where 'look at us we're different but we are all friends!' And the differences were just personalities and status i #society but the body shapes are practically the same. 😆#They were the same shape because the merch used the same mold. ^^; But I think that contributed to messing up my perception.#Like. The level of unawareness I had in drawing fat characters is crazy back then.#when I thought I drew a chubby character but the reality was that she was still slim! I still have her saved in my Deviant Art account #Nobody would've known because she's my OC.#If I were to argue with that past me that she's not chubby. Past me would be extremely confused because she is totally convinced that she #drew a chubby character. Mind you I was above 18 then too.#I had another OC I wanted to be really chunky but I was so bad at it that I found an excuse why she's so slim so I can avoid drawing chunky #I did eventually made her chunky but I almost never posted any of my OCs lol. She also have a black and pink theme. 🤔#Same with skin color but it happened in my own Sona. I have a tan skin tone and I thought I gave my Sona the same skin...but like... Bruh.#I'm even looking at it now. That is kinda pale. RIP #It still baffles me how different I've been seeing thing in the past. Eugh I'm digressing again. :/#sc answers #ask #luisnavarro04 #meme

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