Hello, I’ve read a few small stories from Dir en grey’s meet&greet and experience from the concerts in general aaannddd I also decided to share mine from m&g 19.03 in Warsaw… Maybe just mainly for archival purposes, but anyway… it was quite interesting.

Since It was my very first concert in my whole life (but what is most important Dir en grey concert😭) and I was sosososo hella nervous – on top of all I came completely alone into the dark unknown! The first show of my favourite band. The first meet&greet with precious and talented band members on their first tour destination. I thought I could have died before start of the show.

Beforehand I’ve read some different experiences from m&g – there were really a few, really – it was said that people with VIP queued in front of the venue doors and were entering one by another to meet the members(¿). (Actually I have no clue, because I didn’t happen to enter among all the people… You’re allowed to read to know then lol) When I had come on the floor I saw two queues actually. One to the m&g and another to the merch booth. But as I said, It was my first life experience so I immediately got super confused and didn’t know where to go… Two long queues, a lot of people, I couldn’t understand which one is which… Anyway I stayed at the end of the merch queue (😭) and managed to buy some things almost THE LAST ONE. I mean, there still was a couple of girls near the stand, but… the cashier was very nice, (he let me pull out of the bag some secret postcard&stickers on my own lol) when he said «there is a meeting with a band, so you should hurry» and pointed at the entrance doors. I looked and realised there was no one around, like, really, empty corridor… Obviously I got scared (even more scared than I’ve been all this day) and rushed there immediately, almost running – actually it was just “fast-walking”. I didn’t know the place, what is where, and at that moment I didn’t even know where is the venue and where I entered… I jumped up to the venue with dizzy head, completely at a loss, greatly confused (I’m sorry, but that cashier really made me worry and hurry with those words😭) and first I couldn’t even recognize the place. All happened so suddenly: I saw them. But the first gaze was so quick, really, I only managed to catch the smiley glance from Toshiya first! Probably all of them were so confused of the chaotic way I entered 😭 (I even thought Toshiya was internally laughing at me, but i guess I was simply delusional.) The staff stopped me with "wait" or something, and – oh what a shame… – at that exact moment I suddenly/quickly turned around at my speed (but it wasn’t so fast fr) and stepped back as almost i was about to leave at every moment 😰 There were no fans nearby… before or after me… and we just stayed like that, so so embarrassing… Me, being afraid even just of looking at them, because I knew, I felt they were staring at me… Maybe i got affected by this “wait” from the staff and actually lost all remains of courage, waiting, waiting for the right signal😭 I met eyes with that woman from the staff, she was staring at me and i was looking at her like “what should i do, when am i allowed to step forward😰” Jeez i really felt so many eyes on me, as it was a long moment and i got lost…

But when i raised my sight, i couldn’t bear but just notice Toshiya’s smile 😭 (him being that tall after all) You know, it was just impossible not to catch it. He was staring so brightly, with the kindest and the most loving smile on his face😭 This smile could physically warm a body and hearts, full of gratefulness, love and respect. Since I’m quite young (i’m 20 actually… but the fact that I admit that I look much younger) for a moment i realised – i’m sure – it was a smile of a loving parent/senpai looking at the child/kohai 😭 Just… can’t describe this wholesome feeling, that he created inside of me with this looking&smile. He didn’t cut off his glance even when we actually met our eyes… i mean, i immediately got shyshyshyshy, i couldn’t withstand it and looked away😭 it was just too much😭🤚🏻

Then i noticed Kaoru looking straight and handing his postcard to me, encouraging me to come closer, and so that was the sign when i managed to finally move my trembling body. (The possibility that they might have been waiting for me just flutters all my insides and kills me!) So, then.. everything happened quite quickly, i was collapsed by shock, embarrassment and happiness at the same time, to the point I almost teared up. I bowed at each of them, saying quietly arigatogozaimassss as they were handing me signed postcards. I couldn’t even make myself to raise my head and look at them… Toshiya was the last one in a row, and when i stood in front of him the actual height difference hit me and got me on knees (and that’s the second reason i couldn’t get myself to look up – it would be physically uncomfortable lol i guess) I mean… this man is really tall, I faced his chest at the level of my nose for real, so yeah (I’m 160cm). He was the one who thanked me in response – well, maybe i was just too dumb and rushed too much idk – and that was so cute of him! Really, he seemed to be the nicest at the m&g, he really does care about fans, he really is glad and happy to meet fans😭 and he obviously showed his appreciation of all its power/extent. The one meeting broke my heart.

Of course after this i rushed to the rest of people near the stage (luckily i was in a second row right before Toshiya!) And then they left the place almost right away… I mean, after all maybe i really was the last one??? And what if they were waiting for me?? (It kills me ugh) Idk… I was sure there were some more girls at the merch booth before….

Anyway, talking about my very first show impression, i was sincerely amazed by this little pleasing discovery of my own – all of them actually were looking at fans during the show! Like straight in the eyes. Catching our glances. Sustaining this eye contact again and again. It felt like a dream, it felt like we and them actually connected on some kind of inner basis/level… I’m sure I even crossed some glances with Toshiya and Kaoru 😭 I didn’t expect it so, again, i felt kinda embarrassed, but super crazy! That was so much fun! Really, I will never forget those nights… And now, every time reminding it – all of them, the performance, their movements and emotions, that charming smile of Toshiya – I can’t help but melt into a divine smile…

Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart💔 And thank you too who has read this unexpectedly long message 😭🤲🏻 And sorry for any mistakes..

P.S. I also wouldn’t mind if anyone who has read it, would like to share their experience too🤲🏻 Really, just kinda curious… and after all i don’t have friends who i can talk about diru with sooooooo feel free to share🙌🏻🌷

5SOS: Lisbon & Madrid, the warmest of welcomes as we kickoff or Europe run. Obrigado! Gracias! - September 25, 2023

They gonna make a baby tonight 👀

PRELIMINARY TRANSLATION OF KÄÄRIJÄ HUHHAHHEI LYRICS

this boat of love has been loaded come and sway on my ropes when the last dance and been danced we can go and swing in your cabin

Tää rakkauden laiva on lastattu Käy köysiin keinumaan Kun viimeinen tanssi on tanssittu Voidaan mennä hyttiisi heilumaan

i don't know if i'm the one or if you're still mine when the morning comes but tonight...

En tiiä ootko se oikea Tai ootko mun vielä aamulla Mut tänään ...

Huh hah, hah hah, huh hah hei

when you come to the disco like my inhibitions drop down huhahhahuhahhei right away someone comes AT ME huhahhahuhahhei okay, you're whispering something INSANE to me i'm trying to change ??? they're playing the good old ??? that makes everyone want to get married like back then like

Kun tuut discoon niin mun estot tippuu Saman tien joku tulee kimppuun Okei, sä kuiskuttelet mulle jotain (pähkähulluu?) Mä koitan vaihtaa something something something something

you me tonight ok ok ok ok you me tonight and my heart sings a melody this boat of love has been loaded come and sway on my ropes when the last dance and been danced we can go and swing in your cabin

Sää ja mää, tänään Okei okei okei okei Sää ja mää, tänään Ja sisälläni sydän laulaa sävelmää Tää rakkauden laiva on lastattu Käy köysiin keinumaan Kun viimeinen tanssi on tanssittu Voidaan mennä hyttiisi heilumaan

i don't know if i'm the one or if you're still mine when the morning comes but tonight

En tiiä ootko se oikea Tai ootko mun vielä aamulla Mut tänään ..

Huh hah, hah hah, huh hah hei

ok I won't oppose if this goes- (too much?) or won't be too afraid to (say no) if this goes- (too much?) they're playing the good old Ricky Martin ? that makes everyone want to do ??? like back then like

Okei, en pistä vastaan jos tää menee too much Enkä pelkää sanoo jos tää menee too much (Kun ne) soittaa Ricky vanhaa kunnon Martinii..Se saa joka iikaan haluu kanssaa naimisiin...

you me tonight ok ok ok ok you me tonight and my heart sings a melody this boat of love has been loaded come and sway on my ropes when the last dance and been danced we can go and swing in your cabin

Sää ja mää, tänään Okei okei okei okei Sää ja mää, tänään Ja sisälläni sydän laulaa sävelmää Tää rakkauden laiva on lastattu Käy köysiin keinumaan Kun viimeinen tanssi on tanssittu Voidaan mennä hyttiisi heilumaan

i don't know if i'm the one or if you're still mine when the morning comes but tonight... I'll stay and find out

En tiiä ootko se oikea Tai ootko mun vielä aamulla Mut tänään .. jään sitä selvittämään

Huh hah, hah hah, huh hah hei

(sry if there are mistakes, pls correct me if you notice anything wrong)

Cari Fletcher

jim morrison, roundhouse 1968.

PART 1

Nordmark pod translation Swe-Eng

First third of the interview. I have left out Per Nordmarks moments of reminiscens..

-Please excuse things lost in translation and lack of knowledge in the English language🙈

Enjoy, fellow Ghostie's 🖤👻

N: Tobias Forge. Welcome to the Nordmark pod.

T: Thank's for having me.

N: How's it going?

T: Fine,fine.. It's fucking boring to speak of the weather and such,, but shit! What a great weather we have?

N: Do you get the blues during the winter season?

T;, Ee mm.. Like this.. Like all kids i had, at least some, restless feet and thought it was relatively fun to be outdoors. But at kindergarten and such i was often the one left last. Single mom, had to work you know. Eem, so i liked to be on my own, last, and indoors. I could sit there and have all the Lego for myself and i could sit there with the tape recorder with a bunch of kasettes i brought. And i. I like to be indoors in the nature. If i go to the mountains i like to watch the outside from the indoors. Snowcovered slopes..Being out on the country side, being close to nature but not in it. I'm not an outdoors person. But! I am a very season effected person and so. But when i started going on your, for real. And when i, for the first time, had a shock from when in January going to Australia. Then you noticed like,, my back pain is gone all of a sudden. My body doesn't hurt. What's going on? And because of me going back and forth to Los Angeles during the year i notice, purely physical, that smaller leaps (season wise) feels better. One last thing about weather.. I can say the upside of living north of a certain latitude is that it will take a lot for Sweden to "stop" because of the weather. And i don't know, maybe you didn't go to school at that time. Out,, I'm an -81,,

N: Yeah you're a bit younger than me.

T : Most people remember 1995, when it was one day when baisicly all of Sweden was covered in snow. And it was stated, -Today you don't have to go to school.

N: School for you,,was it a catharsis for you?

T: He he, as in a had a revelation of not wanting to be there? Well yeah. I guess i felt it was pretty boring. As, I found myself socially in a twilight zone, because i was an outsider, like by choice. I had friends, plus i was like… I come from Linköping. Its a small town, or smaller town at least. And when you start in first grade and onwards, and you don't move around, you end up knowing everyone who was around from the start. Like so. And there.. One can say i had wind in my sails in that sense that i knew the "right" people, and people who…But most of the people i knew and was around were of the same age, or one year older. They were,, almost none of them were interested in music, listening to music maybe, but not playing. And then I ended up sort of outside. Plus i wasn't just interested in music, but extreme music that nobody liked and my interests became very specific and i had a laser focus on it. Early on. And that lead me to slipping further and further apart. And at the same time becoming tiered of school and turning teenager. With all that comes with that. And um, eeh, i was pretty messy, both outsider and maybe not that nice to everyone.. It was a messy time.

N: Is the boy playing alone still in there?

T: Aah ey, i,,,I think i create myself a lot of time alone when on tour. I don't know, i'm pretty much in between all the time. But i really need to walk away to charge the batteries. And i have to, ehh,,i go nuts if i don't get to be alone. So basically i make sure of it. If its only to walk the other direction, walk around and return. Just to have some.. But, well, as a grown up i have power over my life and have made sure to get an amount of space. Em, And need to, Emm.. As a, it sounds boring but i'm kind of the boss over a bunch of people, like that, Ee, Now, of course i have hired someone else to be tour leader, to boss over others. So i don't have to be the executive, telling people.

N: But in the end you're the narrative..

T: Yes, and that means to carry a social responsibility to some degree. Like, i can't behave like everybody else does. And I can't.. When were on tour we are like 40 ppl or so. And of course you're not best friends with everybody. And many of them are there because they are very good at what they DO. While if you sat down to talk you find out you don't agree politically and aren't remotely alike. So its kind of easy to, -you go your way and i go mine. I got my stuff over here, and then participate sometimes. It suits me pretty well,.. Oum,, When i'm at home… I've got two kids, wife,, so, So of course it's not… Of course i can just go for a walk, and i do. But you don't have the same possibilities to be solo. To just stay awake all night and just watching.. If i have a day off, like on tour, if i have a day off i can spend the whole day and night in a hotel room just watching You Tube.

…..

…T: It's a plus to come to a city you know..

….

T: But i like Stuttgart. There are some great record shops.

N: Are you a big record collector ?

T: Aaa,ah, I am, but the collecting, or the record store visiting frequency has become less because, Ehh, partly from a knowledge of what it is. So when i come to cities i know where i want to go. In the beginning i went all ower. I could take a cab to go to all the record stores in the city. A whole day. Even if it was a gig in the evening. I was totally exhausted when the evening came. But today i've taken that into consideration. Damn, if i'm in Stuttgart, we're playing in the evening. I can't be out sightseeing. In that case i can make an estimation the day before and say - tomorrow i want to go to a place and make arrangements for that.

N: You do pretty long shows..

T: Nah, ah, well, Yes.. One hour forty five minutes, somthing like that.

N: How does it work those days when you don't feel like it. Are there such days?

T: Well sometimes of course you can be physically and mentally tired, Eem, We had, when we just started this tour cycle now, a little bit over a year ago. We did a,, At first we did a US tour that lasted six weeks or so. Six weeks is pretty normal, i have to say. It's not like shit, it's pretty normal and the amount shows you have to do to cover enough land, and economical aspects aswell. Ja,oo,, if you do shorter tours it tends to be crew quitting. Because they want lasting jobs, and short breaks but no breaks preferable. So one must think holistic what's most efficient for all, so people don't end up quitting. Its a pretty advanced show. We can't, it's disturbing if we have new people in the crew -if they're not awesome that is. It's always like -Shit! we have a new guitar tech. And stuff happens and you hear it goes wrong, and it's the wrong guitar and wrong tune. Ehm, but we did the US tour January, February, March. Pretty dark then. And it was exact in time for covid to be seen as "passed". Concerts was allowed. As far as that it was a go. But rules varied between the states. Almost equal to if it was red or blue. Red state -All is fine,, and blue, it was EH! From a touring perspective my reactions was almost like opposite my political standards. It was pretty tough coming to a city and everything is forbidden, you can't do anything. You're only allowed to leave the bus and walk into that air lock and everybody are supposed to be tested. To me this became so troublesome because now we've decided to do this tour and, -Damn ! It's 7000 people coming.. -And they're NOT! supposed to be tested. You know,, AAAHH!! But in the end we had a deal amongst us, and Volbeat was on the tour too, -We will not test everybody, everyday. As was the plan at first. Because what happened was, we just ended up sending people home, it was such a mess. People getting scared of being fired, hiding they were sick, -you know..such a mess. So we said, well, lets make this tour work now. But we stayed in "bubbles", like many did When you've been in a bubble and not been outside in three weeks,, and to the advantage if our success we're playing in hockey arenas. -Hockey arenas. You know? -it's not many windows, and like, it's somewhat like a being in a cellar, -like this almost. Storage rooms, boiler rooms, long corridors, tile, kitchen, industrial kitchen..Then, you really had to make an effort to just keep up some level of serotonin. So, i walk, everyday, 10.000 steps before the gig. Just to get..I have to walk. And when on tour the easiest way to do that is around the arena. So i was standing by the entrance in a lobby, in front of these huge windows, just standing there to just, i don't know, get some d-vitamin. I felt like i have no reason to be sad but i don't feel happy. I feel tiered and want to sleep, can't take no more ..

…To be continued

Translation by Ulrika Linderoth from the Ghost Sweden Facebook group

Dir en Grey- Astra Kulturhaus

As someone who attended the shows in Berlin, I have to say that I was disappointed with the location. The boys did good. Great in fact. I saw the same fan service that I often see in Japanese shows and they were giving it their all. But the problem was the venue and the area in which the venue is located.

On the very first day, a friend and I woke up and left our hotel room to get breakfast and I was physically assaulted by a local who very angrily asked me "you rich?" and when I chose to ignore him and move out of his way, he took a large step towards me and slammed his head into mine. My luck were the braids in my hair that somewhat softened the blow, but I was shook and out of it for a good while.

After breakfast we made our way to Astra and spoke to the German fans in charge of handing out numbers for VIP, priority and regular. They were incredibly sweet, worried about me and angry. They alerted us that the area surrounding Astra is dangerous and there are many drug users who intake drugs from morning till noon, so they are already far gone... It is an area notorious for its nonstop loud music, drug users and so on.

They told us that suspecting these kind of issues might occur and because they took the safety of other Dir en Grey fans seriously, they had called the police several times and requested that they do more rounds around the area, just in case. Take into consideration, that besides me, other men had already caused disturbances that morning with other Diru fans. We were advised by them to always walk around the area in groups, so we could look out for each other.

We spoke to several German fans, who lived in Berlin and claimed they were done with Astra and refused to watch another Dir en Grey show at Astra after this tour.

Astra itself? Sound quality sucked, the venue looks like a mix-match of several bits and pieces of materials that were donated to put the place together, but considering the overall vibe in the complex, it is intentional. The staff at Astra? Apart from one or two, most of the people there were rude, laughed at the eagerness and excitement of Dir en Grey fans and did mostly nothing when their safety at the venue was compromised.

A German fan was kicked in a mosh pit on the first day by a foreigner and while other German fans tried to lift her up, she was shoved down by this fan and kicked again. During the second day, other disturbances occurred and little to no safety was provided. In fact, the crowd felt almost off on the second day because we were all scared of what the crowd would be like during Ouroboros.

Yes, we all know that if you are going to a metal or rock show this sort of thing can happen and you do so at your own risk, but there were fans claiming Dir en Grey was to blame for this. I don't think most people understand that Dir en Grey cannot be held accountable for the security services that are provided or their fan's behaviour during the show.

Also take into consideration, that this is the impression I came with from the venue. It is my opinion and the feeling I got from it. You don't have to agree with it. If you went to the Astra shows and your experiences were better than mine, I am very very happy for you. If you like the area around Astra and the place itself, good for you.

I was there for the boys and for the most part, I tried to make the absolute most of it and soak it all up. Would I go back to Astra? Absolutely not. Pass.

They have almost 3 weeks to take a break and rest. I hope they will rets as much as they can. And won’t work on any projects during this 3weeks.

The next “bigger” break (which is more 3 days) will only be a week long.

It’s safe to say that the whole fandom is extremely proud of them. And we are also concerned about their mental and physical health.

Wow Europe! Are you guys excited? I wish you the best time 🖤

Ok, the concert was awesome. They played some of their old songs and my inner teenie had the time of her life. I did this for her. I went there all by myself. Anxious as hell but I still did it. I'm finally showing up for myself. I'm finally being the adult my inner child and inner teenager always needed. I'd do anything for them. I'm healing.

.... I made this Käärijä patch yesterday. And. Well. I don't know how this happened. And I only noticed it when I was already on the train to Berlin so it was too late to fix it HOW DID THIS HAPPEN I KNOW KÄÄRIJÄ IS SPELLED WITH A J

Aaah, I'm soooo excited! After some exhausting weeks, I'm finally off to Berlin to see the green gremlin and his crew 💚

It feels so surreal. Travelling alone, being able to sleep in the morning, not being woken up in the middle of the night, no duties, just having a good time and no worries (hopefully).

Edit: just as the train left, Little Big's cover of Blitzkrieg Bop started playing - hey ho, let's go. For real 🤣

22.02.2023