#did just dye my undercut tho
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#being trans masc and having not done any changes at all physically is so weird#im like fuck toxic masculinity ima be a guy in a dress#and then look in the mirror and be like#damn... girl in a dress#like im trying to be all femboy hot guy but im just. femgirl. straightbitch. christiancore.#did just dye my undercut tho#so I've got that going for me#ignore
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I forgot I can just post random shit on here without it being an ask.
Behold: a visual representation of me, just done doing random shit to my hair because I was bored and searching a quote trying to remember what it’s from, and the Microsoft AI spitting out this bullshit at me.
Like. Like why. Why did it do that. I was running on so little sleep. It was like 2 in the morning. This was Sunday night. Why did this happen. Microsoft Edge why are you built like this.
Anyway “You are both tinder and torchbearer” goes hard as FUCK and will be sticking with me for a very long time.
#art#sssbmty#what the fuck do I tag this as?#that Microsoft ai is so…. oh it’s so special#also first time me posting art of myself???#even if it’s just a shitty sketch?#wild#for the record I have the most ridiculous haircut known to man so yes the braided part is longer than the rest#yes none of it is even#yes I cut it myself#yes I’m growing it out#yes none of those sections are the same amount of hair#look I was gonna get an undercut but now I want to dye my hair while I have so much of it#professionally dying your hair is expensive tho and I don’t wanna destroy my hair with bleach if I do it myself#why did this turn into a rant about my hair? oops
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i’ve got the stuff *i shadily look around me and pull a container of neon pink hair dye from the depths of my very cute jacket and slide it across the counter and the cashier rings me up and says nothing because they’re not paid enough for this shit*
#getting my hair dyed tomorrow yippee#this pink glows under black lights :)#it’s very cool#i’ve never done my whole head w it i think last time i used it i did my undercut + roots and had the rest highlighter yellow#it was def a look#tho this time i will not be doing my undercut that shit is so annoying i haven’t done it in years#love pink it’s a great color i haven’t done it in a hot minute though#i’m cutting it close but i really need the color before the semester starts so i can go clown-mode before i lose the momentum#i was born to be a clown i was also born to have everyone look at my in awe because i look great and it’s hard w/o the colored hair#also i have a resting bitch face and the mask helps but the hair helps even more. when it’s bright people will like. actually talk to me#so many people ask me for directions. much more than when i didn’t dye my hair#i think the bright colors make people think i’m friendly which is nice#i’m not like. unfriendly i just kinda mind my own business unless i’m in the mood for mischief#in which case the color doesn’t help but who cares. i’m here to clown about and ignore my sorrows and the pink helps :)
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should I dye my hair pink again…🧐
#callate guero#I did technically buy the dye already but it’s okay there’s always time to say no teehee <3#I will also be getting an undercut btw so <3 there’s that visual#keeping my dark roots tho cause I think it’s a fun contrast <3#and back when I first dyed my hair hat was my favorite part jejeje#also I am NOT doing this at home I’m not getting THAT silly#just felt I should mention that 😭
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fun fact: I forgot my hair is curly
another fun fact: I'm trying to grow out my undercut
save me
#how did you forget your hair is curly pete? oh well I'm glad you asked I'VE HAD LONG HAIR FOR ALMOST A YEAR NOW#AND ALWAYS KEPT MY UNDERCUT AT A LEVEL 2 SO IT WOULDN'T GET THIS WAY#i have no idea why i didn't see this coming if i look back on photos of my short hair post T it's obvious this was going to happen#also yes my hair did change post T#it made it way fucking curlier#which is both a curse and a blessing#usually i like it a lot and with my pink hair i sometimes end up looking like lion from steven universe#but it's a curse right because of my undercut growing out#and i can't just fucking pin it down because my hair is too like slippery for that#which is something i got from my mom#at least i got my dad's genes for great hair for hair dye and bleach#usually my mom's hair has to bleach for a while and for multiple rounds even tho she's naturally blonde#while my hair has actually turn platinum blond and nearly white from leaving the bleach on for an hour#it was crazy#anyways hair rant over
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Omg those eras were insane on Changkyun~ I loved them sm- Tho absolutely biased but I biased him during Beautiful/Shine Forever era so those are my two of his~ And I understand that a lot!!
Kihyun- I agree- w/pink hair is one of my weaknesses- But Jealousy is hands down my favorite era for him & Hyungwon- But I've loved Stuck (undercut) era, rush hour, dramarama (specifically curly haired), and voyager sm~
Minhyuk, he was my first bias- so I am absolutely partial to white/blond Min- every time he dyes his hair that- I am absolutely floored- But I absolutely agree he ate up Beautiful era-
And lastly, Hyungwon... he didn't get me until Shape of Love- but he's been bias wrecking me since day one- But SoL, Rush, Rush Hour, and aforementioned Jealously~
Do you have a least favorite era for Changkyun where you absolutely homie hopped the whole era? (or is it just me bahbahbea)
And did you have a favorite Shownu era? Since you favor him a bit too-
Undercut Kihyun was super attractive! Honestly the Stuck MV had them all looking so foine! Blonde Minnie is such an unstoppable force! He's literally so freaking gorgeous! Hyungwon's pink hair during Jealousy era was actually life-changing. But also that platinum hair he had during Shoot Out era??? This Hyungwon??
UNBEATABLE! Look at this Dark Prince!
I don't think I have a least fave Changkyun era. He always delivers for me! Always hits. I homie hop every, single era lol.
Favorite Shownu era??? Other than the current era, I'd have to say Beautiful, Shoot Out, and Gambler eras were top notch Shownu eras. Shoot Out era was such an epic era in general. Monsta X has always had some amazing stylists and they really keep our boys looking fly and cohesive through and through. I've never run into a bad era for MX. They always slay. I'm just waiting for the day Shownu dyes his hair some outrageous color. I'm sure the stylists have suggested it and he probably outright refuses lol.
What about you? Fave Shownu Era? Jooheon? And Wonho? You're an OT7 stan right?
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Hihihi Sweet tea!!!!
I hope you’re doing well
Life is actually starting to calm down a bit and at the same time not ^^’
I’m currently doing okay tho
Got my hair done so it is now dyed again tho a lil different and I have an undercut now so hoping that helps out with the heat and stuff ^^’
Not excited to have to be overly cautious again cause hair bleed and stains. No light colored shirts for me rn lol
Hopefully you’re doing well tho!!!
Miss talking to you!
Love and appreciate ya tonssssssssssss and tonsssssssss!!(/platonic)
Lotsssssss of platonic love to you sweet tea!!!!
<333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333
hi starshine!!!
I'm good!
glad you're doing ok! remember to still take care of yourself even when a lot is happening, ok? it's good that things are calming down tho :)
what colour did you dye your hair this time? I bet it looks good on you
I kinda wanna dye my hair, but I don't know what colour would suit me
anyways,
undercuts are really cool in my opinion and they do help a lot when too much hair is bothering you and stuff like that!
I miss talking with you too! if you feel up to it we can hang out again, play games or just chat
I kinda wanna play bokura, but that's a game where both players need to talk with each other, so we'd have to call
so that's only an option if you feel comfortable with that
or we could just play minecraft again or maybe stardew
lots and lots of platonic love to you starshine
love and appreciate you infinitely /p <333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333
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Does any Hermit vary drastically between your AUs? Like, personality or physique wise?
oho!!! yes!!! doc, ren,etho, iskall, and i believe. so. i co-own the war au (from my friend Chrome) and the voidskall au (from my friend shadow) doc: in the war au, he gets a bit power hungry and violent against the hippies. very mean, lashing out, basically make doc very violent, remove most his good traits since he's so caught up in the disappearance of the nho. in hardcore jungle he is very smart, learning things very quickly and picking up on body movement and cues. he wears a thick green cloak, no lab coat, and his robotics are wrapped in vines. throughout the story i plan to make him go a bit,,, returning back to creeper. like full on feral. redstone soda: he's a tamed creeper, just like the other aus. and has an immense hate for birds and roses/poppies
etho: redstone soda, he's an aetherkind. i havent done much in the story about it but thats spoilers if i talk bout it here. :). harcore jungle: f as t, precise, a bit cold but long hair with an undercut? m. love. idk about war au and voidskall tho.
ren: due to me loving ren so much. he. i love he. but in hardcore jungle: ohohoh man. hes a werewolf and nobody knows. hes a feral boy. he is f as t. he is strong. i love he. this man? perfect. except for the fact he wants to murder. war au: OHOHOH MAN. He's like. hes insane at the point the story was last updated. literally.. hes werewolf. he fuckig whimpers himself to sleep oh goD the hippies need hugs in that au. all of them. theyre all going insane from being trapped. oh ofgodogdfg in redstone soda he is a dogman. common knowledge on the server, just a big ol dogy man :) he is friendly. he is huggable. he is dumb but KIND and he can COOK and ;o i love this man. and in uhh.. what else. oh yeah!
SoTRP and Voidskall!! in voidskall he has two different rens, one from another universe sorta? idk. but there's Den, who is Void!Ren. and there's Phen!Ren, who's a phoenix man :>
and in SoTRP, he's Phen!Ren as well, amnesia and all because he does not recall there being an icebird!mumbo in this world or kitsune iskall. personality wise? in SoTRP hed bully void into self care. he fucking saved him from dying and :) in an au of voidskall, where Den and Void die due to voidhounds, Ren accidentally kills Den when trying to protect him but actually shoots fire at him. he hides away, and while the other void hermits fight over whos the leader now, he and Avrian (void grian) talk it out.
Avrian says he should be leader, and due to avrian being the one with the role of appointing new leaders, ren agrees and gets the signature golden tattoo. but he regrets it and hides in the void. but he goes insane, and rips off his feathers, cuts off his wing, just anything to get rid of his bird side. but its useless. he cant do it. so his feathers start sticking together due to blood, tail feathers turining gold and into one long tail which he also dyes silver, his ear feather solidifying and turning into a horn the color of his skin, and his other wing becoming metallic and curved.
his skin is blue, hair silvery. he bids farewell to avrian and hops into another universe. another world. because he has a new name. his name is now Den. and hes now an evil hermit in Redstone soda.
iskall: war au, hes on a77's side. he has adhd. hes scared of doc. hes just scared for his friends, scared for grian and ren. just scared. but he works for a77, believing his friends will get better. but they dont. Cleo and Joe help him out, they spend time devising a plan to find the hippies. until cleo gets bitten by a zombie horse, hides for a week, and when joe finds her in the snow, bleeding, and now a centaur, iskall panics and goes into the hippie commune, a mask on and ready to find em. he gets chased by a big spider aka ex. ends up close, but unable to find the hippies.
hardcore jungle: man. hes scared man. sure, he has the most comfort with bdubs, zloy, pixl, and ely in a treehouse. but hes scared for his friends. scared of the dark :( poor man needs break.
SoTRP and Voidskall: thats the name, he's voidskall. hes an ass. hes cold, turned from the void. he hates the voidhounds, wants to escape. but he cant. he has the shackles. but Ren helps the best he can, with his phoenix friend cuddling him sometimes. the heat, the warmth. hes barely felt it, being in the void. but he loves the warmth. also he needs SELF CARE GOSH DAMIG NNSJfksf
redstone soda; hes got an evil alternate known as Eskall. eskall despises shad (the nether being). hes been nearly mind controlled by glowshrooms. he knows what hes talkign about. but eskall ticks and fidgets by scratching himself, he cant focus. he accidentally prevents his redstone from working. iskall helps him out throughout the days of s5 loading in. also iskall is given the feathered protector, basically a legendary blade from the aether. he found the blade in the end when end busting with mumbo, but xisuma and siren actually told him what the blade was for and he was like "Ohhhh".
also he is strong and i headcanon he works out with grian and false on weekends.
bonus:
cub: he is neutral in the war au, but he favors the hippies and tries to find them, working himself to sleep. in redstone soda, a part of his soul, disembodied (CubVex/CubBan), has the ability to split people into two (emotions/personality trait wise), and fuse people (eg: Doc and iskall in s5). Cub is aetherkind as well, and finds himself with the hermits in s5, waking up in scars base. because the evil hermits tried to kidnap him sorta, but badtimes was like: ok no not for us. give him to scar.
scar: redstone soda au. he does not react well with potions. his scars? netherkind dealt those to him. hes been scratched by jellie on his hands. he scratches himself to keep himself awake as well (not healthy guys. but this is also me self projecting so). hardcore jungle au, the vex live in the crystal on his choker. he nearly died from the vex (chapter 2).
war au, hes docs right hand man. hes just not enjoying the whole thing, but going along with it because hes too afraid to say no, and he is also under the guide that things are gonna be okay.
cleo: war au. shes on a77s side. she is a centaur some point through, though this is unwritten. she becomes a centaur because she is bitten by a zombie horse during research. she does not like being a horse.
mumbo: war au. hes more on a77s side, but also against, but also sorta not for the hippies. neutral, working against cub. he took as poultry man because he missed grian as well. he took one of cubs drones and with stress's help, he reprogrammed it for himself. also he has gone a bit insane if i say so myself also the meanie took iskalls adhd meds. dont do that folks
also in redstone soda i will proceed to introduce grian as a shark man. because i love shar ks andi love grian :D whoa h i did not mean for this post to be so long-
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Alright, let's do this!
I was tagged by: @jongupseyeliner thank you, dude! 💜
How tall are you?
165cm (never checked how much it is in inches so I did it now and it's 5'4'')
What color and style is your hair?
Right now super short with an undercut, gonna dye it purple soon
What color are your eyes?
Green
Do you wear glasses?
Nope, contacts
Do you wear braces?
No
What's your fashion sense?
Tomboyish, I love oversized t-shirts and sometimes wear male pants, usually everything in dark colors (clothes are pretty much genderless to me)
Full name?
Marta
When were you born?
January 20th
Where are you from and where do you live now?
Poland
What school do you go to?
Currently enjoying a gap year, but gotta go back to uni for my last year in October D:
What kind of student are you?
Terrible, next (seriously tho, my major is so demanding I had to take a break for a year to recover emotionally, even if I used to do fine at the beginning, like, I wasn't the best and was always definitely too lazy, but I usually scored Bs y'know m'sayin?) #procrastinationismymiddlename
Do you like school?
Not really, I have to follow my own pace for some knowledge to stick and school's pace only got me stressed
Favorite subject?
English, languages in general, literature, uh, biology was also kinda neat?
Favorite TV shows?
(oh god there is so many) supernatural, teen wolf(unfortunately), Brooklyn 99♥♥♥, the office, how I met your mother, goblin(it's a drama but still), I have a feeling Lucifer is gonna join these as my fav soon
Favorite movie?
Constantine (forever in my dead, black heart), finding Neverland (god I always cry), maze runner (because Dylan fucking slayed), pirates of the Caribbean, the mummy (the 1999 one)
Favorite book?
Oh Jesus, uh, at the moment it's gotta be the raven cycle, but I honestly couldn't pick just one
Favorite past time?
Writing (daydreaming about writing, really), creating scenarios for fanfiction with my bros, watching TV shows, reading manga & books
Do you have regrets?
Are you fucking kidding me? Of course I do, so many, so, so many...
Dream job?
Well payed writer lmao
Would you ever like to be married?
I don't think so? We'll see, if that changes in the future tho
Would you like kids?
No
How many?
Still no
Do you like shopping?
Not really, I'd rather buy what I have to buy right away and get the hell out of there when I'm alone, but if I'm with friends then it's a lot more fun
What countries have you visited?
Japan, Croatia, Germany, Czech Republic, Italy, France, England, Slovakia, Belgium
Scariest nightmare you ever had?
I have them occasionally, like recently I dreamed I was being sucked into a horror game and didn't know how to escape the psychiatric hospital, but the worst nightmare I had was after I watched Dante's Peak in like, middle school. There is this scene where they have to swim in a small boat across an acid lake and the grandma gets out to push them to the shore despite it eating at her legs. I dreamed about this scene for more than a week and it sometimes was my grandma. Catastrophic movies suck.
Any enemies?
You mean my messed up inability to move forward in life? Yeah
Any significant other?
No, sir
Do you believe in miracles?
I wouldn't say that, no. I do believe in karma tho
How are you?
Lived through a mental breakdown just yesterday, so just fuckin peachy
I'll tag:
@cherryblossomchangbin @the-moon-buns @cryptid-taekwoon @me-gris @yongguk-hell-chyeah
#pole dancing is so cool @jongupseyeliner#okay no pressure doing this#but it was fun for me#tag game
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for the ask game: 2, 9, 14, 17, and 18 💞💖💗 - 🍒
tysm hon!!! ok lemme see
2. If you were to take your bias(es) somewhere in your hometown/ the place you live where would you go?
i live in toronto so probably the big aquarium!! it’s so pretty and fun, ive only been once since its kinda expensive but there’re all sorts of activities and fish and its gorgeous!! i saw all sorts of sharks and jellyfish i feel like mingi nd jongho wld have a good time there lookin at all the lil critters, i feel like mingi wld rlly enjoy pettin the lil stingrays and sharks its So Much Fun :’)
9. Which member would you trust to dye your hair?
probably joong tbh?? i feel like he’s the most trustworthy in that respect kdlfskldsf tho tbh i think i wouldnt rlly trust any of them to dye my hair dklmldk
14. Is there a hairstyle you really want to see on your bias?
i just desperately want them to get jongho’s hair off his forehead and give him a proper undercut,,,undercuts are my fave hairstyle theyre so sexie...like mingi’s undercuts are so good??? !!! or like nice wavy hair, a nice undercut with wavy bangs would be So So cute i want tht for him sm,,,
17. Which member would you choose to put an outfit together for you?
san tbh i rlly liked that outfit he picked for that mission on wanted that he did with mingi, i loved tht shirt he was wearing sm i want it so bad, i feel like he’d dress me pretty well !!
18. Rank your bias’ looks throughout all Ateez eras.
oooo okay im gonna do jongho and mingi separately ok so for jongho his number 1 era has to be treasure ep. 1 he looks so damb good in pirate king and in treasure hes got his forehead out and he looks so handsome and tan and adorable 11/10 best jongho era, second place would have to be treasure ep. 3 i like his blonde hair its cute but i desperately wish they’d do something even remotely interesting with it but they do nothing sigh, and in last place is ep. 2 bc his hair was so unbearably boring and not even his cute sexy suits could mend that for me. ok for mingi his number 1 era is def ep. 2 hes So Good And Handsome like his undercut?? his big long coat???? hes so perfect i love him sm, second place is the same as jongho ep. 3 i like when they make his hair cute nd wavy and his vnecks r adorable, and ep. 1 is last bc of those nasty frizzy braids they put in there?? not a good look poor baby :’)
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Alphabet Tag
I was tagged by the lovely @jingertonic like an eternity ago so here we go :3
a // age: 20, turning 21 in April
b // birthplace: Some small town in Germany that is only really known for the author who was born here (Hermann Hesse xD)
c // current time: 14:12
d // drink you had last: I just made myself some tea, it’s like some fruit tea blend?
e // easiest person to talk to: hmmm my younger sister probably cause she knows me really well? Also @kyungsalt cause she’s super chill
f // favourite songs: ugh, this is super hard. these days I’m listening to “Hero’s Soup” by Stray Kids and “Wires” by The Neighbourhood a lot. I also have a whole youtube playlist dedicated to song recommendations :D
g // grossest memory: okay, hold your horses because this is actually super gross. so like a couple of years ago my family moved. like my mother cared for this old dude’s house while he was in the hospital (we didn’t really know him but my mom was friends with his neighbours) and he didn’t make it. his children didn’t really want the house (cause it was old and kinda really run down, more on that later) so they sold it to us.
and as I said, that house was... old. and hadn’t really been cleaned properly... for years. so yeah, the place was disgusting, we had to renovate it completely and I think I wasn’t even around to see the worst of it. because foolish as I was I decided to take care of the garden. it’s been years and we still haven’t managed to fully make that garden presentable but it was way worse.
so there was this little goldfish pond, right. and we didn’t want a goldfish pond. so we planned to drain it and fill it up with soil and maybe plant some flowers there. so there was still water in it. I assumed that the goldfish had died already. they did. but they were still in there. also, we didn’t really have anything to pump out the water or whatever so for a while I just scooped the water out with a small plastic bucket (actually got some on my hands which was already disgusting cause it was super dirty and filled with rotten leaves and all that). then I found the goldfish. they had indeed been dead for a while. at least they smelled like it. I don’t know if any of you have ever smelled a rotten goldfish, I pray you never have to because I almost threw up into that pond. the only thing that made me keep down my breakfast was the thought that it would only get more disgusting if I actually threw up into that water because I still had to scoop it out.
I drained that fucking pond and I don’t ever want to see goldfish again.
h // horror yes or horror no: I’m a sucker for everything creepy. I especially love more atmospheric eery kinda horror movies or anything ps<chothriller style but I also don’t mind splatter^^
i // in love: yeh
j // jealous of people: sometimes I guess?
k // kids of your own someday: I like kids, I like hanging out with them and playing with them for a bit, but I wouldn’t want to have own kids. you see I can only tolerate them in small doses. like hanging out with a child for an hour or two every once in a while is fine. but having them around me constantly? fuck no.
l // love at first sight or should i walk by again: I don’t really believe in love at first sight. infatuation maybe. or like crushing on someone on first sight. but love? nah.
m // middle name: I don’t have a middle name... which I guess is kinda rare cause everyone else I know has one?
n // number of siblings: I have one younger sister :3
o // one wish: to be able to finish my bachelor’s degree smoothly and figure out what to do with my life after that
p // person you last called: I skype called my sister a couple days ago to discuss and idea for a fanfic, does that count? like I usually don’t make phone calls a lot. oh, I called my tattoo artist last week to tell them I had a new phone number so they could reach me in case anything came up (got an appointment for an epiphany related tattoo in mid febuary^^)
q // question you’re always asked: uh, I don’t think there is like a specific question people ask me a lot
r // random fact about you: I really love piercings and tattoos and stuff like that. at the moment I have three tattoos (soon to be four^^), both of my earlobes are pierced (twice on both sides) and I have a helix (right)
and I really want even more piercings, like I’ve been thinking about getting a septum, or maybe a medusa piercing? I also low key want a tongue piercing cause that's seksi but is it worth it tho?
I guess atm I’m most likely to get more stuff on my ears (since they are so visible because I have short hair) like a tragus maybe?
also I dye my hair like constantly and have some badass undercut or whatever so I guess I look kinda intimidating to some people??
s // song you last sang: wires by the neighbourhood because as I said I’m listening to that a lot atm
t // time you woke up: around 8 I guess but I didn’t really bother getting out of bed until around 10
u // underwear colour: black
v // vacation destination: oooh, there are a lot of places I want to see, but I guess my dream goal is to go to America and have some cheesy cliche roadtrip with my friends
w // worst habit: I constantly chew on my nails and the skin around so my fingers are always messed up
x // x-rays: oh damn, I’ve broken my arm like four times already and there were always several x-rays involved (and that’s not even all of it)
y // your favourite food: ugh, this is so hard. like... all food is great? I eat pretty much everything and I’m open to trying even “strange” or “exotic” dishes. but I guess some of my favourite foods are pizza, burgers (like the really good ones, not the kind that you get at mcdonalds or whatever, although that’s a bit of a guilty pleasure as well), hot pot, basically any form of potato (especially fried or baked), pasta (like especially anything with tomato sauce, bolognese is one of my go-to meals and I love arabiata) and I guess also ramen (everytime I visit my friend she takes me to the same ramen bar and I love it)
z // zodiac sign: Taurus I guess? like I think I’m kinda on the cusp of Aries and Taurus
tagging my usual suspects @applejoon @kyungsalt @krosthefaer @mayozika and @thewinterends (as usual, no obligation, let me know if you don’t want to be tagged in stuff)
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✨how did you get into MK? what position do u usually sleep in? How often do you spend on a piece of art that you take from sketch to colored? What are your favorite snack foods? Do you get your hair cut every 6 weeks and do you stick with the same look?✨
hmm mk is a bit of an anomaly for sure….even tho ive been sifting around webcomics for abt a decade now, i really only ever am keeping up w a handful and rarely actually pick up any new ones. i’m the same way w like, all other forms of media, like shows and music and stuff…its not like even me being all too critically picky, coz i can hardly ever convince myself to check out shit i know i do/will like. but anyways i suppose it was a couple yrs ago and me freezing my ass off in a barely-insulated terrible expensive apartment while dying of depression & it was the middle of the night & i wasnt tired, and sometimes i reread a comic coz i realize ive completely lost track of the plot or characters or something…so i was doing that and there was a guest comic by the artist for mk & i was like, well you know, thats cute and funny and i like how they draw, i’ll just put this in a separate tab and maybe come back to look at their comic for once in my life b/c its not like i hve anything better to do at like 4am. so i finished my reread and figured i’d check out at least a bit of mk & when it drops kip on you right off it took me like 2.5 pgs to he like “well so………he’s gay right? and a nerd?” and so then i was like, obviously i have to follow through on this Gay Lead. b/c i mean, you never really go into anything assuming that anybody will actually get to be Not Straight, no matter how obvious it seems b/c you can’t trust anyone. so even though its right there and makes no sense for him to be straight i was still like going along trying to keep my hopes down even tho there’s no other interpretation….even when the surprise came that he has a beautiful Ex Boyf & i had like a heart attack b/c that far along i was already like “woops i also love him” i was still like trying to come at it from some other angle like…… Maybe This Is Just… Um….. i dont remember but i was like ok but seriously this Has to be an ex right? i mean my god. anyway by that point i was also deeply invested in the fact that kip is v….v much many Char Types i love and xtreme relatable plus he’s flawless and deserves the best despite being doomed for the worst……. so anyways at that point it was like 7am & i was thrilled and yelling a bit about that sweet rare vindication of This Is All Gay Right and like gosh hope he gets kissed by like everybody…… and thats about how that went
oh god…… trying to find a sleeping position can be the worst a lot of the time. like, it changes up and i have to do the tossing and turning bit… sometimes its all huddled up and other times my body wants to be stretched out… im sabotaged by the whims of my body re its comfort tbh. like i’ll be fine in any position and then suddenly my limbs or hips or whatever decide they’re uncomfortable. the other week it was only sleeping on my stomach that was tolerable. i guess on avg i sleep on my side but theres no real standard position, i wish there was
phew i…honestly can rarely draw anything in a matter of less than hours. under 2 hours is shockingly rare. it depends on the day for sure, sometimes drawing comes more naturally, sometimes my focus is less terrible…. for a guess at whats average though, for like a usual drawing that i also add color to, i’d put it at maybe, 5-7 hrs? i’m awful at paying attention to when i start/stop something. and i have a lot of pauses in there b/c of the terrible focus bit. but usually i don’t do coloring thats too fancy so it only tends to add on a couple of hours to the lineart, which is helped along if i’m doing it digitally w how easy it is to erase stuff and not worry abt the sketch being too messy to clean up or whatever. sometimes i wish i could spend another eon on the coloring also, but you can spend just as much time on colors as the lineart and i like to do everything in one go too much for that really… plus just that i’m bad w colors and dont expect to ever be as good at them as with the lineart element of things. anyways tldr all you need to know is…i’m really slow :(
oh god snacks…. i love to eat anything really. i’ll make anything a snack or a meal or whatever. i like stuff like corn chips or just dry crackers… i like to eat cereal just plain… i’ll eat a box of corn chex any day. or a box of oreos probably in like one go. i am a fan of cookies and ice cream and everything. pretzel sticks are great too. fruit snacks are great… a few times ive just been in the mood to cut some like orange bell peppers into strips and eat that…carrots are amazing too… theres this cucumber/cream cheese dip that is…fantastic with chips. idk i like to eat most things
i actually used to tend to wait too long to get my haircut and put it off till it’d been like two months and was getting too long in the back and i hated it lol….. i know we’ve talked abt the Homophobia In The Salon how you have to try to wrangle the stylist into accepting that yes, you really want it that short, and keep them from trying to take it in their own direction. and i’m nervous enough w social stuff like that where i cant know what to say beforehand, and doubly nervous b/c of it being really stressful and exhausting for me to try to just like stick to what you actually want and explain this very simple cut to ppl who sometimes will act like they have no idea what you mean…and it would be triply difficult b/c back in the day i’d catch all this shit over having my hair as short as i wanted b/c my mom was having a whole internal shitstorm about me being a wholeass queer and so of course she was gonna flip out about how i look as if that will solve things for her. i always forget that i Was in fact abused for the ol “not seeming properly cishet” business. so the nervousness abt the haircut experience lingered!! but it helps that sometimes i’d find a really nice stylist who would be friendly and remember the general idea of the cut i liked, and i could stick with them and that was helpful. but for the past year i’ve really just been giving myself a continuous haircut myself w the occasional aid of a bathroom mirror, i’m not fancy. my Ideal Cut gradually got shorter and shorter over the years, w it now being maybe an inch and a half on top and shorter on the sides in that General Undercut format. i rly dont like much length on the back of the neck or by the ears lol…plus it doesnt help having glasses when your hair is getting too long. maybe it would be nice if i could someday dye it my favorite kind of blue, right. but in the meantime, as long as its short enough i’m good
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flower crown + beaches for the cute asks!
flower crown: when did you last sing to yourself?
a while ago in class. i’m humming a song by stromae atm tho.
beaches: if you had to dye your hair how would you dye/style it and why?
maybe red/purple or rainbows. because if i’m going to colour my hair i’d either go one that’ll be barely noticeable on dark hair or one that announces i’m gay af to a five mile radius. as for styling it, i miss my undercut so i’d probably get one again and just go with it??? idk man, right now my hair’s kinda long & very curly and i’m not sure how i’ll style it along with that?
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Tag!
Tagged by @swaggyt-enthusiast !
Rules: You must answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people.
THE LAST
1.Drink: Tap water lol
2.Phone call: Parents
3.Text message: a group chat with 2 friends
4.Song you listened to: Medals by Luhan (ofc)
5.Time you cried: a long time ago? I don’t think I cry much?
6.Dated someone twice: yes and no? complicated?
7. Been Cheated on: Not exactly
8.Kissed someone and regretted it: No
9.Lost someone special: Yeah
10.Been depressed: ah...
11.Gotten drunk and thrown up: No way!!
LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:
Black, white, red
IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…
15.Made new friends: A lot of new ones!!
16.Fallen out of love: Yes...
17.Laughed until you cried: Yes bc my friends are nuts
18.Found out someone was talking about you: Yeah but all good things (I hope no one is saying something negative?)
19.Met someone who changed you: Yes
20.Found out who your true friends are: We’re getting there
21.Kissed someone on your Facebook list: No
22.How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: Most? But a lot I just met recently because I’m searching for college roommates but I haven’t seen them in person yet
23.Do you have any pets: I HAD a goldfish for 6 days... otherwise... do the 2 cats that wander into my yard count? Cloudy and Professor Orange??
24.Do you want to change your name: Yes but I don’t know what to
25.What did you do for your last birthday: Ate with friends, got bubble tea and went to an art museum
26.What time did you wake up: Usually I wake up at 7 on days off. Sometimes later but I never sleep later than 8 or 9
27.What were you doing at midnight last night: Sleeping. Some of my friends were out clubbing tho lol
28.Name something you cannot wait for: Going to college! I’m super excited
29.When was the last time you saw your mother: Half an hour ago
30.What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: I wish I grew up learning Chinese. It’s hard because I was adopted so I didn’t grow up around it like my other Chinese friends did
31.What are you listening to right now: Let Out the Beast by EXO M (I’m making myself emo)
32.Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: I think so? I only know one Tom. I think he has anger issues
33.Something that is getting on your nerves: Certain... people. I don’t get annoyed easily but...
34.Most visited website: Tumblr or YouTube
35.Elementary: Finished
36, High School: I’m graduating in June!!
37.College: Almost!!
38.Hair color: Black... it’s never touched bleach or dye but we’ll see about that when I’m in college haha
39.Long or short hair: Pretty short. It was an undercut but it’s growing out.
40.Do you have a crush on someone: No
41.What do you like about yourself: I like my eyes and my hands lol
42.Piercings: Just one on each ear
43.Blood type: B
44.Nickname: V, Vic, Vivi, mom
45.Relationship status: Single :’)
46.Zodiac sign: Virgo
47.Pronouns: Male pronouns
48.Favorite tv show: I don’t watch much TV but I do like Ancient Aliens when I’m bored haha
49.Tattoos: None but I’d like to get something on my forearms
50.Right or left hand: Right
FIRST…
51.Surgery: None
52.Piercing: Ears when I was in 5th grade
54.Sport: I’m good at anything with running... but that’s it so I’ve never actually played a recreational sport... Unless you count soccer in the yard with my dad a sport
55.Vacation: Florida? When I was 5? or maybe NYC?
56.Pair of trainers: No idea
MORE GENERAL…
57.Eating: I just ate chocolate. My favorite foods involve meat, noodles and spicy stuff
58.Drinking: Water. I wish I had bubble tea
59.I’m about to: do my art homework
61.Waiting for: waiting to wake up inside (lol I’m not funny)
62.Want: cats, good relationships, a solid future
63.Get married: maybe someday in the future? I’m only 17 I’m not really worried right now!
64.Career: Ehh something with art? Writing? Music? Anything creative
65.Hugs or kisses: Hugs
66.Lips or eyes: Eyes!!
67.Shorter or taller: Either
68.Older or younger: Either
70.Nice arms or nice stomach: Stomach? But I don’t think it really matters
71.Sensitive or loud: sensitive but loud when I’m comfortable
72.Hook up or relationship: Relationship!!!
73.Troublemaker or hesitant: Maybe a happy medium? Or know when either is appropreate
HAVE YOU EVER…
74.Kissed a stranger?: No
75.Drank hard liquor?: No
76.Lost glasses contact/lenses?: I don’t wear either
77.Turned someone down?: Sort of
78.Sex on first date?: I’m a virgin and no
79.Broken someone’s heart?: Yeah..
80.Had your heart broken?: Yeah
81.Been arrested?: No!
82.Cried when someone died?: Yeah
83.Fallen for a friend?: Well people are friends usually before they start dating so yes
DO YOU BELIEVE IN…
84.Yourself?: I’m trying my best to!!
85.Miracles?: Miracles exist but in all honesty they’re really just slim chances. But not always impossible if you work hard enough!!
86.Love at first sight?: Idk?
87.Santa Claus?: Ok I still believed in Santa up until like middle school. Not bc I wanted him to be real but bc i wanted Rudolph to be real and i sincerely believed that my Rudolph stuffed animal came alive every Christmas to help Santa. I was a weird kid ok.
88.Kiss on the first date?: I don’t think so but maybe?
89.Angels?: Maybe? I’m not too religious
OTHER….
90.Current best friend’s name: I don’t have just one... but my mini squad is Ak and Jun and my art squad has Al, Haley, Julie, Nan, and sometimes Jordan even though she dropped the class
91.Eye color: Warm orange-brown (a euphemism for poopy brown)
92. Favourite movie: The Grand Budapest Hotel, Studio Ghibli movies
I don’t think I have 20 people to tag but this is close enough!
@chogiwapark @baekhyunsboo @3ouncesofwhoopass @forever-dasha @official-lightsticks
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Random Tag
Tagged by my favourite monbebe and aghase @cinnagyeom-roll <33
1. How’s your day?
Not too bad tbh, a little hectic tho. I woke up late and was almost late to class but my teacher was late too so I technically wasn’t late. But I had a really productive first 3 classes and then my last class was interrupted by a lock down drill and we had to go take attendance in like 3 different places. But overall not bad.
Plus the CBX comeback is so funnn!!
2. Have you already, drank, ate, rested enough today?
I have eaten one (1) sandwich, haven’t drank anything all day, and am running on 8 hours of sleep. So a normal day for me? (it’s 3pm as I’m writing this btw)
3. 3 things you love about yourself?
1. How well I work with animals, I can read them very easily :)
2. How easily I can make myself happy after something upsetting happens
3. I like to think I’m pretty friendly??
4. 4 songs that make you smile?
1. Blooming Days - EXO-CBX
2. Shine - Pentagon
3. Rubber Band - iKON
4. La La Love - NCT Dream
5. Tell me one completely random fact about you!?
I’m right handed I own one (1) 14yo horse (she’s a mix don’t ask me her breed), one (1) 2yo Portuguese Water Dog, and one (1) 3 foot long Egyptian Uromastyx (he’s a lizard, just ask google for a pic)
6. Why did you create your account?
I originally made it to keep up with JackSepticEye and Markiplier cause I used to be highkey into that YouTube gaming life
7. Absolute dream job? (Like it doesn’t matter if that job doesn’t even exist!)
An animal therapist (physical) or animal breeding of some form
8. Which book would you like to direct a movie for?
Ready Player One because I adored that book and heard the movie version was terrible so LET ME AT IT
9. Do you want to marry one day?
I’d love to someday, I’m still way too smol to be thinking about that now though
10. Who is the person you trust the most?
I usually tend to keep difficult things to myself, but if I really need to ask for advice I’ll go to my close friends or guidance counsellor
11. Which internet friends do you want to meet in real life?
@xuhoon @whoozyuji @busan-daegu-hiphoplover @cinnagyeom-roll @supercriminalwolf @llavkey @thedaysix @achuu-nice @astrayminho @chuuyo @busanschubs @smittenbyschmidt
12. If you can do a movie marathon with 1 random person, who would it be? (No matter if celebrity/idol/lives away/ isn’t alive anymore)
kdjsajdk @cinnagyeom-roll I agree, Bambam would be so much fun to watch movies with. But at the same time I would love to watch them with Ten...
13. You can choose 3 languages that you can suddenly speak, which would you choose?
“Korean, Chinese, Thai” Same Gyeom, same
14. Write down the first few words or sentence that comes to your mind, when you read/hear this word: HAPPY
I have like 29381293 thoughts running through my head at any given time and currently I’m listening to kpop whilst pretending to pay attention in Spanish class so um... I love you guys?
15. Do you prefer blue sky with sun or dark night sky with moon and stars?
Definitely dark night sky with moon and stars, I love love love looking at the stars and plus I’m very much a night owl
16. What were you scared of as a child?
The dark, snakes, and people
17. Are you still scared of those things?
I am definitely still afraid of the dark sometimes cause I live in the city and have this constant underlying fear that some wackjob from the streets has just walked into my house without me knowing and is now just chilling in the darkness of my room.
SNAKES ARE DEATH NOODLES AND NO ONE CAN CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE
People are awful and although I am getting less and less scared of interacting with them I still get freaked out by a large majority of them
18. 1 thing you want to change about the world?
“PEOPLE NEED TO STOP SEXUALIZING PEOPLE” PREACH IT GYEOM
I wish people would keep hurtful and unnecessary comments to themselves, it’s something my mom does to me all the time. Like I’ll be listening to kpop in my room and she’ll come in and say “why do you listen to this, it’s so awful.” like wHY
19. What outfit do you feel the most comfortable in? What do you wear when you’re really yourself?
A large hoodie (the bigger the better), blue or black skinny jeans, and my timberland boots
20. Do you have tattoos? If yes what meaning do they have? If no do you want some and why?
I don’t have one yet cause I’m still a smol and my parents would disown me, but I am very interested in getting one. I’d love to get a small black horse shoe on the back of my left shoulder because it was an injury in my left shoulder that got me to stop ski racing and start competing in horse riding.
21. A hairstyle/colour you always wanted but were too scared to actually get?
I’ve never really been afraid to do anything with my hair. Once I wanted to dye part of my hair a galaxy mix of purples, pinks, and blues. So I did it. And then later I wanted to shave off the colours in exchange for an undercut that I could shave kpop logos into. So I did it.
22. Is there anything you would want to change about yourself?
mmmm I don’t think so?? I mean sometimes I wish I didn’t blush as easily as I do but at the same time I don’t really care??
I wouldn’t say I’m confident in myself, I’m more content than anything.
23. Do you think you’re loved?
My friends show me an astounding amount of love and support.
24. Which person that you don’t personally know, has influenced you the most?
Although I don’t technically stan him anymore I think I would have to say Min Yoongi from BTS (Suga). He was probably the one person who introduced me to kpop, and because of that introduced me to so many new people and things. And since then, little parts of me have been changed for the better :)
25. Name 5 things that would be definitely on your bucket list?
1. Move out asap :)
2. Meet my online friends
3. Learn another language for fun, aka not as a school course
4. Raise and train an animal on my own
5. Go on a trip with my friends
I’ll tag @howcaniwait @xuhoon @drowning-inkpop @achuu-nice @thedaysix @undinefin @whoozyuji @astrayminho @scene-stealers @khbdh @chuuyo @busanschubs @busan-daegu-hiphoplover @ilysmhanbin @hunbunnie @llavkey @smittenbyschmidt
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Im so. So. So. So. Fucking. Tired
#august living#i did so much yesterday#too much and i just want to go back to sleep#we did our first proper grocery haul for the apartment in the morning#haha spices are expensive but we have a full spice cabinet now#and then i moved some stuff by myself bc todd did some unpacking and helped me bring stuff from the car lol#thank the lord for how much non perishables my mom has bought specifically for my gluten free needs that i picked up yesterday#oh i brought a desk chair for the living room bc my laptop wont find the wifi and i dont know how to get it to find it on windows 10#so i have to use the ethernet cable lmao#i cleaned my old ass bed which we moved on wednesday and laundered my bedding#ohhh i died my hair before i showered so now i dont have 5 inch long roots and my undercut blends in and i feel vry handsome#i was punished for my hubris of not wearing gloves and doing way too much in one day tho bc i got hair dye in my eye almost immediately#its fine my eye is fine my face and my hands are covered in black tho i look like im gunna do one of those edgy photo shoots#like where they have their finger tips and the perimeter of their face painted black lmao#lmao im going to do like next to nothing today
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