I’m gonna start coining tumblr specific cognitive biases and logical fallacy terms…here’s the first ones I’ve theorized so far. (I’m using “actor” here meaning “the person, acting out the fallacy or bias for us all to see.”)
1. The unique contribution fallacy—reading a post of over 10k notes and the actor thinks of something they surmise is very clever to add. The actor imagines themselves to be the first special unique soul to contribute this add, when OP has actually received this “clever” comment 5000 times of those 10,000 notes driving OP up the wall.
2. The whataboutism bias— reading a post on any given particular topic, and believing that OP should say every single thing that you could possibly say about that topic under said single post. The actor doesn’t know they have a personal agenda on the topic and expects OP would have that same bias to talk about the side of the given topic that correlates to the actor’s personal bias, instead of allowing OP to be somebody who just writes what they wanted to write. This often works in tandem with… 
3. The TLDR bias— seeing a post that is actually extremely long and thoroughly well written, often times with sources, numerous added threads of detail etc. but the actor doesn’t actually read the content of the FULL post. Then, in reblogging it or commenting on it, “adding” something that OP definitely originally said, and revealing oneself as somebody who doesn’t even read the detailed things that they re-blog or add on comments about.
3. The literal URL fallacy— not understanding the total chaos that is the Tumblr URL, in this fallacy the actor thinks that someone’s username is ALWAYS telling you exactly what the content of their blog might be. I’ll illustrate this one in like a totally random example way… Let’s say that you hypothetically made a blog that was all about calling out bigots back in the days of yore, the early twenty teens. And yet somehow, despite the fact that every other user around you seems to not be taken literally by their URLs, the actor decides that everything that you post is therefore bigotry…….even if what you’re posting is your own original content that you’re writing, calling out bigots. Too bad, so sad! Because in this fallacy, the actor is going to see you as what your URL says, literally, always.
4. The missed URL fallacy— this of course is the exact opposite of number three. It is where a blog has a very particular theme and format to it, that is the most important thing you can notice to understand the context of a post. So, again, just a random example here… But let’s just say that the intent of a blog is to always post submitted weird ass dreams people had, but the actor doesn’t realize this in their relogging and thinks that somebody is reporting a real life situation that was definitely, very specifically a wild fever dream.
5. The throw the baby out with the bathwater bias— a fan favorite among left leaning and social justice corners of the site, this bias is when the actor reads a post where somebody doesn’t use the most optimal, virtue signaling language for them personally, so the actor ignores the whole entire point of the post. It could be something as serious as and attention demanding as genocide, but somebody uses a word like “crazy” or “stupid” or “bitch” in it and so the actor’s worldview and general proclaimed values are casually tossed aside because the language that was used to deliver it was not “perfect.”
6. The choose your own reality bias—The actor reads a post and reblogs it, adding commentary that is responding to things that are definitely not said in the original post and definitely not anything in the realm of what OP was talking about. Close cousin to…
7. The this is definitely about me/self-own fallacy— this one is actually one of my favorites to spot out in the wild because it is SUCH a tell. It is like a slightly more specific version of the “choose your own reality bias” but this is when the actor reads a post and blogs it, adding commentary that is responding to things that are definitely not said in the original post as if OP is talking about them personally, and therefore revealing themselves as potentially shady or suspect in someway because why did they make it about them, if it’s not about them, you know?
8. The zombie post fallacy—in this one, the actor most likely does not have time stamps enabled on their dash because that isn’t something that happens here by default, and this site has a higher presence of zombie posts (by the way its designed and how it functions) than any other social media site I know. So when a zombie post from 2011 shambles across their dash in 2024, they react to that content as if it is completely new and relevant information or news or a situation to be dealt with in the modern era.
What needs added?
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Being terminally online but only on tumblr and youtube just makes it so you’re forced to go through accidental humiliation rituals irl. Absolute lose-lose situations.
Several months back I started my first ever big person job out of college. My coworkers’ (despite most of them being my peers) exposure to the internet largely stops at Tiktok and Facebook.
It was about one month in when I looked over at my coworker’s computer and see she’s looking at pictures of the onceler on google images.
Obviously my blood freezes in my veins but I go “Hey whatcha looking at over there?” And she explains to me she is planning on putting a photo of “The guy from The Lorax” in our coworker’s locker because he looks like him.
But as she keeps scrolling she’s… discovering. She’s having an experience I wish I could have shared with her instead of looking on like I’m seeing corpses strewn about a battlefield. She’s seeing the art. She’s baffled. “Why would people draw that? What’s going on?” she wonders. She is 24 years old. “People are weird.” I say. It’s all I can say. I’m new here and we are at what is essentially a help desk where guests can come up and talk to us at any time. I leave it be. She finally chooses a normal photo to print.
Later I’m having a conversation about it with another coworker and she goes “oh yeah. Well, apparently on Reddit it was a thing to like… you know… want that guy and the Lorax to kiss.”
I almost lost it, guys. I was screaming in my head. There was an entire 2 hour youtuber essay being held back because I was unwilling to expose myself. I had to just look her in the eye and go “yeah that’s crazy lol.” There was no discussion about the self-ship art. That went right over their heads I think.
A few months later and I’m making jokes to my other coworkers about which president they would marry and my friend pipes up “we should make a tumblr about really hot presidents, guys.” Now this time I only had a moment to suffer the weight of Hamilton Tumblr before she said “It’s too bad none of us have a tumblr and it’s dead.”
(Now before you go and think she’s just doing a bit I later confided in her I have multiple tumblr accounts and she was like “Oh. Good for you!” and promised me she didn’t have one. I believe her.)
Then we come to Columbo Night. Columbo Night is when we all get together and watch Columbo. I was doing a bit where I didn’t know what drugs were (well half of a bit, because I don’t actually know too much about them).
I mentioned learning about angel dust in DARE, but when everyone asked what that was I had to admit I didn’t know which specific drug it was slang for. So they looked it up on urban dictionary. They find this:
They lose their minds trying to figure out what was going on with this definition.
I kept my mouth glued shut.
They learn it’s from Hazbin Hotel. “I think Hazbin Hotel is a web comic?” someone pipes up.
I’m staring at the floor in front of me. The handful of youtube video essays I’ve watched on the show are playing out in front of me. I’m counting my blessings I’ve never actually watched it.
They’re having conflicting opinions about the art style. I’m gripping the edge of my seat.
And then, it’s time for Columbo, and it’s all over. Just as quickly as it started, it ended. Thank you Columbo.
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the summer fic exchange 2k24
all matches have gone out for the summer fic exchange 2k24!
you should have received a message/ask which details your match, and what they would and would not like to receive. please acknowledge my message if you have not already. if you have not received your match, please let me know right away.
don’t ask me when the masterlist is coming out—the answer is when all fics have been posted. if it’s not out yet, there’s still fics left.
i have asked that the writers use the following tag: #the summer fic exchange 2k24 so if tumblr is playing nice, you can use that to find fics whilst waiting for the masterlist
rules/reminders/important info all under the cut!
fics are due: August 3 at 11:59pm in your timezone (but you can post any time before this!)
the minimum word count is 1500 words
your fic does not need to be summer themed, the exchange is only titled that way because that’s when it’s taking place
use this opportunity to challenge yourself, it can make it all the more fun
keep everything (or as much as possible) a surprise!
please turn on anonymous messaging
if your giftee does not have anonymous messaging, please let me know. i can act as a go-between for you
some people’s urls might be a bit tricky to find but i can also help out with that!
if you change your url, please let me know
post your finished fic to tumblr so that everyone gets to enjoy your creation
make sure you tag me and your giftee when you post
if you need some help with anything (someone to bounce ideas off or editing or even characterisation), please hit me up
use a read more break when posting; be kind to other people’s dashboards (how to add a read more on mobile)
should something come up and you are unable to finish your fic, please let me know so that i can arrange a pinch-hitter
i can no longer promise to read every fic that's posted. i will try my absolute hardest.
if you have any questions, my ask box & DMs are always open
some handy question ideas to get you started with messaging!
from this list of players you want to read (*insert list here*), who would you most like to read?
what are your favourite tropes to read?
what are your favourite songs of the moment?
do you have a stronger preference for reader insert or OC?
what are your favourite rom-coms?
what is your dream vacation destination?
what do you definitely not want to see?
what is your favourite holiday?
if you have any suggestions for questions, please say! i will try to update this as i see some float across my dash.
p.s. everyone say thank you to @offside-the-lines for her assistance!
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Jazz's little. Her parents are super cool. They're ghost hunters! It sounds like something from a movie about future and scientists and supernatural beings and cool-looking tech. They have cool-looking tech at home. It's even cooler than tech in the movies.
Jazz also has a little brother. He's stupid but he's hers, and she will protect him from anything. Her brother is very small, he needs someone to protect him and teach him about the world.
She knows about the world. She understands their parents much better than him, and she can tell her brother when they shouldn't be distracted. She knows when they're upset and irritable, and she knows when they're too excited and being near them is dangerous because of all the inventions.
Jazz does a very good job keeping her little brother safe.
---
Jazz goes to school. Her teachers say that she's very smart, the best student in class, and very mature. Her parents are proud of her - when she manages to distract them from ghosts. Her brother is still kinda stupid and doesn't know how to properly fight food, but she's always there to protect him, because that's what older sisters do.
Her classmates seem to think that she's weird though. Some of them say mean things and call her a teacher's pet and a show-off. Jazz isn't sure why they think so because she's always trying to be friendly but maybe she's doing something wrong. She goes to the school library and finds a book about people and their communication.
It's a very interesting book.
---
Jazz is almost a teen. She's gotten better at communicating with people. The school library ran out of psychology books, and Jazz now has to go to the city library but that's fine. Human brain fascinates her.
She's been feeling like something is wrong about her though. She even thought that she was going crazy for a little bit. That probably wasn't true because she didn't match any symptoms but she was still worried.
Someone told her that being so good at lying and faking face expressions is not okay. That's probably not true, Jazz is pretty sure almost everyone can do that. Or maybe she's just being a prodigy again. It's a very good thing to be able to do after all. She can hide her emotions from her family when she's feeling sad. She wouldn't want to worry them, would she?
She'll have to research it.
---
Jazz is a teen. She now knows that her parents aren't actually that good. It's something that was really hard to accept but it did explain everything. Her parents are kinda bad at being parents, and they also don't really listen when she tries to explain it to them.
It's okay. She's almost an adult and Danny has her. She can take care of herself and her brother.
She learns everything she can about being a parent and a therapist and tries to use her knowledge. It's hard, but she's a Fenton, which means that she's very smart and determined. She pushes through, and trains on her classmates and herself.
In the evening she writes about her feelings in a journal. It's very important to be aware of her feelings because that's the first step to dealing with them.
She's experiencing sadness. And anger, actually, even though she doesn't like to admit that.
She writes "this family is a fucking mess" in her journal and then covers the paper with ink until the sentence is absolutely unreadable.
---
Jazz is sixteen, and her stupid parents opened the stupid portal, which means that they're even worse than usual. It's pretty much okay when they're just stuck in their stupid lab, making some stupid weapons. It's not that okay when they're out of the stupid lab, because they get their stupid inventions all over the stupid house, and stupid food comes to life, and she has to protect Danny from both their stupid weapons and stupid hotdogs, and oh god everything is so stupid.
She's experiencing anger.
She's also acting perfectly calm and almost cheerfully.
Jazz hates how perfect her fake smile is in the mirror.
---
Jazz is seventeen. She wants to put her headphones on and listen to some loud music. Jazz can't do that, because she gets anxious if she can't hear what's happening around her. She needs to be fully aware of her surroundings because she needs to be able to protect herself and her brother if weapons against ghosts become weapons against children again.
She thinks that it's not okay.
The house smells of ectoplasm, so she'll be extra careful when opening the fridge.
She thinks that she shouldn't know how ectoplasm smells.
Jazz should probably also warn Danny: her little brother's gotten better at fighting food but doesn't notice the smell of ectoplasm. Funny, considering his ghost sense.
Funny, considering that her brother is a half-ghost.
That her brother died.
That she failed at protecting him after all.
Jazz stops breathing to prevent herself from crying, and doesn't need oxygen for a few minutes too long.
Maybe she failed at protecting herself too.
---
Jazz is turning eighteen next month. Her parents are all of a sudden more attentive and caring, as if that can change their almost-absence during her whole life. She doesn't like their attention because she doesn't know how to deal with it. She doesn't even really think of them as parents anymore.
She thinks of them as a threat.
Once she's eighteen, she's gonna try to move out, and she's going to take Danny with her because it's not safe to leave him here. Maybe after she gets a good job and saves some money, she'll even get into therapy.
Jazz thinks that she needs therapy.
She's been having Bad Thoughts lately, and she doesn't write them down in her journal. Jazz stopped writing anything in there ever since she found out that Danny is a ghost. She just couldn't risk anyone finding that journal.
Jazz isn't sure if she should call those Bad Thoughts intrusive. They scare her, and they're Bad, but it could be just her normal thought process.
It's still definitely not normal.
---
Jazz is eighteen. Her parents are very excited, whispering to each other about how they found a perfect present for her, some surprise that she's gonna love.
She doesn't care.
Her little brother is late from school, and it's weird, because he was also super excited about giving her his present.
She's worried.
Her parents brush off her concern, say that Danny probably just got distracted talking with his friends. They don't listen when she says that Danny wouldn't get distracted like that on her birthday because he's not them, he actually cares about her, he doesn't forget her birthdays, and something has to be wrong for him to be that late.
They don't listen to her at all.
She's angry.
Her parents are excited and talk loudly about how they wanted to find a perfect gift for their favourite daughter, and how they managed to do it because they love her so much. She hates when they're excited. It only leads to problems.
They bring her to the lab because of course they do, why would they make a gift that is normal and isn't kept in the lab, right? They usher her in, so obviously proud of themselves.
She hates them.
And she hates them much, much more the next second, because the gift is her little brother in his ghost form, strapped to a table, unconscious and injured, and the smell of ectoplasm is strong in the lab because of his green blood dripping on the floor.
There's a cold part of her that analyses her feelings and tells her what emotions she's experiencing, and that part is very aware of thick black smoke of wrath twirling and twisting under her skin. It's suffocating, and she stops breathing as it invisibly fills her lungs, scared of letting it out.
There's a perfectly fake part of her that keeps the smile on her face as her parents gush about how hard it was to catch the ecto-scum, and what they can do to it - together with Jazz because they wanted to share this with their amazing daughter.
Jazz is black smoke of rage under perfect glass of calmness when she grabs Fenton anti-creep stick. The smile she learned to fake under any circumstances doesn't falter when Jazz brings the baseball bat down on her father's head. It grows a little bit wider when she hits her mother, because Jazz learned to smile brighter when she's hurt or sad or scared or angry - experiencing any "bad" emotion actually.
Jazz is angry when she grabs her weapon.
Jazz is furious when she kills her parents.
Jazz is worried when she checks her brother's wounds.
Jazz feels nothing when she rigs the portal to blow, walks out of the house and presses the button.
She is her parents' genius daughter after all, and she did listen when they were telling her about their inventions. Maybe it would have taken longer to do, but she had Bad Thoughts, and they probably weren't just intrusive after all, because she did what they told her and made it very easy to make a bomb out of a portal. Just in case. Her parents were a threat, and Jazz was smart enough to prepare to dealing with threats, and she was smart enough to make it look like the threats dealt with themselves.
She really hoped she wouldn't have to use that button though.
---
Jazz is nineteen. Her sort-of-friends at uni offer to go to a restaurant, and she tells them that she doesn't celebrate her birthdays. There's a noise of all of them saying that maybe she should try, noise that she really should have expected, because humans are always so excited about any holidays, it's hard for them to understand that someone might not like them. It's not hard to stop that noise though. They shut up very quickly when Jazz says that she had "a very traumatic event" on her birthday.
Good. She doesn't like loud people.
Jazz goes home to her little brother. He's sad because his parents died in an awful explosion a year ago. He's still trying to smile because it's also her birthday, and Jazz is very happy that he's bad at faking a smile.
It means that he won't end up like her.
Jazz hugs her little brother, and he gives her a little present that she adores, and then they sit in silence and eat some takeout. It's very nice.
She never tells Danny that their parents died before the explosion, and that the explosion wasn't an accident, and that their ghosts did form after that because of all the ecto-contamination they had, but she made sure this wouldn't become a problem. She never tells him what she's done, because that would hurt her little brother, and she would never let anything hurt him.
Jazz will protect her little brother from anything.
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