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#dazai tries to drink it every now and then
lovedazai · 3 days
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WORST BEHAVIOR . . . dazai gets turned on watching you fight and just can’t help himself.
ft. pm!dazai + f!reader, pm!reader, possessive behavior, physical fighting, dazai is a little pervy, one use of ‘good girl’, semi-public & unprotected sex, choking (m!receiving), 2.5k w.c…mdni !!
p.s.! ⊹ ࣪ ˖ i know i’ve been promising this one for a while :< thank you for being patient with me !!
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dazai already knows you indulge him; you let him get away with more than anyone else ever would. even outside of work, when he’s stripped of the authority that comes from being the youngest port mafia executive, the unspoken next in line for the throne of yokohama’s underworld, you always give into his whines of five more minutes or just one more kiss, i swear.
if you asked him, it was your own fault that he liked you so much; you were addicting. if the port mafia was a black hole where all light escaped, you were a twinkling star, falling from the sky right into dazai’s blood-soaked hands, and he loves you more than he ever thought he could. you weren’t quite an executive yet, but you were good at what you didー fighting.
there were only a few things in his meaningless life that made him less than bored: drinking with odasaku after work, harassing chuuya to tears, and watching you train, or better yet, getting to see you on a mission. his favorite part was that you always looked so, so hot while you were doing it.
he tries to act surprised when you’re both sent to take care of some low-level group, threatening to leak information that they definitely didn’t have. he didn’t really have to come with you on this assignment, it was below his level as an executive, after all, but he went through all of the trouble of leaking the address to one of the mafia’s “hideouts”, ensuring they’d show up at the dingy warehouse. it looms before the two of you, weathered from the salty air of the port, glass windows splintered and broken.
his coat flutters behind him with every giddy step, happily following after you and your little black skirt; maybe if he was lucky enough, he’d get a peek beneath it.
“are you sure you don’t have somewhere else to be right now?” you turn to look over your shoulder, reaching your hand out for him and intertwining your fingers loosely.
“there’s nowhere else i’d rather be.” he swings your arms between the two of you loosely. you only drop his hand to pull the rusty door open, greeted by three men, all expectantly waiting for you.
“my, my,” he whispers against the curve of your ear. “looks like we’ve been caught.”
“what do we have here? a little girl…” one of the men grins, looking at you in a way that made dazai want to kill him himself. the way his eyes drag up your body stirs an instinct to pull you behind him. “…and her guard dog?”
of course, he’d never put you in any real danger. this group was pathetic, and even at three to one, they didn’t stand a chance against you. dazai can predict all of their moves flawlessly anyway, and you have a implicit understanding that he never gives you more than he knows you can handle. his gun remains heavy against his side, always within his reachー just in case.
his fingers instinctively twitch towards the grip as one of the men reaches to grab you, but you don’t let him, seizing him by the forearm, leg sweeping him from behind and tossing him onto the ground. he falls to the concrete with a groan, looking up at you with a dazed scowl. the heel of your foot connects with his jaw before he can make another move, and he falls still against the ground.
one of the other men comes from the side, but you’re still too quick, catching him out of the corner of your eye and dodging with ease. you hit him hard enough for him to stumble, and you take the opportunity to grab him by the throat, knocking him backward. dazai’s eyes widen, the hair rising against the bandages wrapped around his arms and neck; he was almost jealous. the man chokes as you slam his back against the wall hard enough for his eyes to roll back and his body to crumple to the ground.
there’s only one man left, and your lip splits when his fist connects with your face. dazai’s eyes narrow, and the man’s glaze over in frustration as you recover quick enough to dodge his next hit, crouching low. you curl your leg around his waist from behind, pulling him down to the ground by the back of his shirt until he’s pinned beneath you.
you’re quick to get up, and when you’re far enough away for dazai’s comfort, he aims his gun and fires once, twice, then again before the man falls still.
the only thing heavier than dazai’s presence is his gaze, and you feel it prickle against your skin like the sharp edge of a knife from where he’s still standing in the doorway. when you meet his eyes, they’re red and glowing, and locked onto you.
he walks towards you, only the heavy sound of his shoes against the cement and your quiet breaths filling the warehouse. you swipe your thumb across your lip, breaking his gaze to look at the blood smeared into the crevices of your fingertip before dazai grabs your chin, tilting it upward. his tongue is warm as it traces along the cut before he presses it past your lips. your noise of surprise is muffled as he kisses you, the taste of your own blood permeating your mouth.
he walks you backward until the back of your heels hit the edge of the cold, concrete wall. his mouth never leaves yours, tracing the roof of your mouth and the edge of your teeth as if he doesn’t already have every part of you committed to memory. his cock strains against the fabric of his trousers, poking against your thigh as he presses himself flush against you.
“dazai,” you try to warn, but it isn’t very convincing, breathed out like a hymn; god, his name has never sounded so sweet. he sings your name back with a smile, groping you through your shirt with one hand as the other unbuckles his belt. he slides his fingers down your stomach until he pulls your shirt out from where it’s tucked into your waistband, flipping the hem of your skirt upward to expose those cute little panties. “we’re still…we’re here. in a dirty warehouse.”
“what’s wrong? there’s no one else around. you made sure of that, didn’t you?” he cups your chin between his fingers again and turns your head towards the enemies, bloodied and unconscious, chests heaving shallowly. he presses a kiss to your jaw, trailing up until his lips rest against the curve of your ear. “did you already forget? when their bloodstains haven’t even set into your clothes yet? i didn’t know you could be so cold.”
he unbuttons your shirt with the flick of his thumb, just enough to expose the curve of your tits, sitting oh so prettily in your bra. he skims his fingers against your panties, stroking the soft fabric where your most sensitive spot is covered. he pulls them aside, giggling against your ear when you’re already wet as he slips his middle and pointer fingers inside of you. your frown falters as he curls them with expert precision, eyelids fluttering in bliss as something achingly sweet ignites in your stomach.
“you know what i was thinking while i was watching you?” he drops his voice low, watching the way you sink your teeth into your bottom lip when he finds your clit, grinding the heel of his palm against it in pressured circles. “‘i wonder how it’d feel for her to choke me like that…to wrap these pretty little fingers around my neck and squeeze’.”
the lingering adrenaline of a fight and dazai’s body pressed so close to yours makes you feel dizzy. you part your lips to reply, but his hand is back on your jaw before you can respond, brushing his mouth over yours teasingly.
“do you have any idea what you do to me?” the pad of his thumb is cold against your warm cheek. he strokes himself with the slick collected on his fingers, pressing into you with the tip of his cock. his bangs fall over his eyes as he hangs his head and watches you stretch around the shape of him, disappearing inside your warm cunt inch by inch.
your nails dig into his arms, feeling his lithe muscles tense through the expensive fabric of his coat. he pries your hands off, fingers wrapping around your wrists as he pins them against the wall, holding them in place with one hand. his grin bites against your neck as you throw your head back and arch your hips instinctively.
“my good girl,” he breathes, sucking the skin beneath your ear between his teeth, soothing it with a kiss when you whine. “my sweet, perfect girl.”
“mhm,” you exhale, your own breath getting caught in your throat. your back is pressed against the cool cement behind you, with dazai’s firm chest flush against your front. the broken window above you pools sunlight over your half-dressed bodies. “yours.”
you feel his uneven breathing against your skin as he presses his lips against your jaw. his cock rubs against you deliciously, velvet walls fluttering and clinging to him each time he pulls his hips back. it’s so easy to melt into him like this, with the security of his hands against your skin, his soft hair tickling your neck, and his cock filling you perfectly, like you were made for him to take.
he lifts your leg, fingers squeezing the plush of your thigh and supporting your weight. he thrusts inside you at a new angle, hitting the slightest bit deeper, but it’s just enough to make you gasp as your belly flutters and your knees nearly buckle beneath his palm as he holds you up. your hands clench around nothing, nails digging into your palms in a desperate need to hold onto something.
“the way you threw that man and pinned him to the ground,” he whispers. “would you do that to me?”
“no,” you’re breathless, words lost on you as your mind clouds over with pleasure. his hips grind against yours, the head of his cock kissing the deepest part of you as your eyes roll backward. “i don’tー i’d never hurt you.”
“but i’d let you,” he rasps. “you could do whatever you want to me.”
he lets go of your wrists, and you bend your leg around his waist, trying to press him even deeper. you balance on your tip toes as he thrusts into you harshly, curling your arms around his shoulders, as if his cock nestled inside you wasn’t close enough; it was never enough when it came to dazai.
“fuck,” your voice is breathy and broken, and it echoes throughout the gutted warehouse. the heat building in your stomach is already overwhelming, rushing to your head until you feel drunk on it. your muscles are taut, toes curled as you feel him throb inside you, his hips stuttering. “osamu.”
his grip on you tightens, and he whines; it’s just barely audible, and you would’ve missed it if he wasn’t right next to your ear. your eyes are hazy, half open as you look at him through your lashes as he watches the way your tits bounce against the fabric of your bra in time with his movements.
your hand trembles as you lift it, closing your fingers loosely around his neck and pulling his gaze back to yours. you can’t help but grin, lips curving up into a drunken smile as you watch his cheeks flush a pretty pink and his eyebrows furrow in pleasure. dazai rarely expresses his emotions so openly, and you commit it to memory as best you can through the fuzzy feelings of bliss blurring the edges of your mind. he lets out the prettiest noise, something between a moan and a cry vibrating against your palm, his cock throbbing inside you as you squeeze his bandaged neck.
his thrusts grow sporadic, breathy moans growing in volume. his nails dig into your hips, and you rub your clit desperately, quivering in his grip as you feel him stall and cum, warm and deep inside you.
everything fades to static as the sweetness in your belly burns brighter and brighter until it finally explodes into white, hot, sparkling pieces that pierce your vision. dazai pants and hangs his head, but his eyes snap to yours as you mumble something close to “cummingー”, always so desperate to take in the pretty way you fall apart for him, because of him.
he whimpers when you draw your hand from his throat to his face, brushing his bangs away from his eyes. you cup his cheek, smoothing your thumb against the tape holding his small patch of gauze in place as you breathe in one another.
your legs ache, tensed muscles finally relaxing as you lower your foot back to the ground unsteadily. your head falls against the wall with a final sigh, chest heaving. dazai is beaming at you when you peek your eyes open after a few moments, looking irritatingly adorable with his messy hair and crooked tie.
“i can’t believe we did that here,” you glance towards the pieces of shattered glass that litter the ground.
“you loved it,” he smiles, brushing the tip of his nose against yours. “you love me〜”
he pulls out of you carefully, snapping your underwear back into place. you grip his tie, wrapping it around your hand and pulling him in to press your mouth to his before straightening it and sliding the knot back into place.
he pouts as he watches you start to button your shirt back up, squeezing your waist softly.
“can’t you leave some open?”
your glare is weak, and he meets it with a smile. he slides his coat off his shoulders, draping it over your own to hide your wrinkled clothes.
“i’ll call a car to get us,” he hums, slipping his hand into your own as he guides you outside the warehouse. “i’ll even give you the rest of the day off for a good performance!”
you rest your head on his shoulder, sleepy and sated. the breeze is cool on your warm skin, carrying the scent of the sea as it gently brushes through your hair.
“you know,” he starts, typing away at his phone, still as happy as ever. “you still owe me lunch from losing that bet last week.”
he has another tease on the tip of his tongue, but he falters when he sees the red splotch of blood staining your pouted lips. he slips his hand beneath your chin and tilts your face towards him. he frowns at the cut, visible eye narrowing as he brushes his thumb against the corner of your mouth.
you wrap your hand around his wrist loosely, pulling it back to press your lips to his palmー i’m okay. he sees one of the mafia’s black cars pulling in from the corner of his eye, and presses a lingering kiss to your foreheadー i know. he pulls the lapels of his jacket tighter around your shoulders before he slips his hand back into yours, and when he walks you to the car, his coat flutters behind you.
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BSD MASTERLIST
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au where everything is the same but dazai and atsushi own a flowershop
i thought cafe first but i didnt want dazai to poison everyone
like dazai quits the mafia, blows up chuuya's car, leaks a shit ton of info, wanders for like a month, meets atsushi, kidnaps atsushi, goes back to yokohama, opens a small flower shop with an apartment on top where he and atsushi live
maybe they join the ada, but mostly they sell flowers
no one in the pm or the ada really has any reason to go to a small flower shop in some random corner so no one recognizes dazai
maybe a few underlings but atsushi uses his amazing (lying) lying skills and says that's actually his brother razai or some shit and they believe him
anyway
kenji is a regular after he joins the ada btw, he comes to buy flowers and donate plants and strikes up a friendship so now dazai and atsushi get fresh fruits and veggies from kenji and yeah kenji buys flowers and puts them everywhere becuz look at how hard his friends worked on them !!
kunikida comes to visit once becuz he wanted flowers and no shop got them just right - atsushi tries his best to get them and kunikida says theyre fine and he has so reason to come again, but he does potentially becuz of the stack of books atsushi had behind the counter becuz like he had no prior education - and kunikida says he's there just becuz but he spends hours of atsushi's free time helping him study and then he says he's just there for atsushi but he also seems to enjoy dazai's company in his own kunikida way
ranpo comes claiming he got lost but dazai's pretty sure he's there for atsushi and him actually - he has little interest in the flowers but he sticks around and invites himself to dinner occasionally and likes to pick dazai's mind - he's leading them towards joining the agency lowkey but ahem its a secret
anyway the others come too im tired of thinking
akutagawa when he's dating a flower shop owning civilian and meets his brother and yeah
oh wait alternatively akutagawa watching his cute flower shop owning civilian of a crush/bf beating the enemy of the week close to death
they also sell poison but you cant prove it
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toorurs · 1 month
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LOVE IS AN OPEN DOOR
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synopsis: if you wouldn't know any better you'd think that chuuya nakahara doesn't take a liking to you - he loathes you. but what if one day you make a shocking discovery that it might be the opposite.
pairing: chuuya nakahara x gn!reader | wordcount: 1.2k | content & warnings: im at the first ep of s4, so if chuuya mischaracterized no need to wonder…, school au-ish kind of??, cursing (fuck), dazai teases chuuya for his crush, chuuyas kinda not rly good with his feelings and expressing himself, drinking (chuuya offering to go out and drink), dazai plays cupid/matchmaker
a/n: when i wrote this i didn't have 15 yo dazai or chuuya in mind (cause of the school au yk) just as them idk but interpret it however you like - high school or college wtv, im so obsessed with chuuya rn y'all don't even know, hope u guys enjoy this little thing i've whipped up in an hour
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you're convinced that chuuya nakahara hates you.
that's one thing you're sure of. after all, he avoids you like the plague; however when the two of you do get in touch with one another, he starts cursing you out, calling you names such as “dumbass" and abruptly leaves.
yeah, you're pretty sure that that guy dislikes - if not despises you. although until now you've hadn’t had the slightest idea why. well, that was the case up until now.
some days have passed since you started noticing it. every time you hung out with dazai and started laughing a bit too loudly at his jokes or lightly slapped his shoulder, chuuya gave you a death stare - if you wouldnt know any better he looked like he’d grab your throat any minute to shut you up.
admittedly (and also embarrassedly) you never really noticed it until dazai has pointed it out. which, on one hand, explains the weird feeling you’ve recently gotten - it felt like someone was shooting daggers at the back of your head, luckily for you, that’s solved now.
but on the other hand, you still demand an explanation why chuuya would do that. is it simply because of his (one-sided) hatred towards you, that can’t be the case right? or did he have a huge crush on dazai, that’s the most realistic explanation that you can think of.
-
once school ended and the bell had just rung to release everyone from their classes and go back home. you’d usually scurry home right away, because there was no point in staying longer, after all who’d want to endure this hell house also known as school more than necessary, it's no use right?
well jokes on you, staying over time was definitely worth it. kunikida assigned you the task (forced) to carry a huge stack of boxes full of documents and paper to your homeroom teacher's room, because it was the “right” thing to do - well at least according to his ideals. 
“but what about dazai? that idiot  just ran off and is probably slacking off right now!” you protested, because it's not fair when everyone has a task to complete and someone else just gets to relax, right? 
at your complaint the blond could only scoff “i’ll scold him later, but for now let's just concentrate on the task in front of us, time is running out.”
-
that’s how you ended up here, back pressed against the heavy classroom door that separated you and the two guys that were inside the room as you tried to listen in into their conversation.
initially your plan was to find dazai, drag him by the collar of his white button up and beat his ass for skipping and leaving you alone with a ton of boxes that not only cost you ten minutes to carry around or so.
because neither kunikida or anyone else didn’t bother to tell you that there were three, fucking three, of those staples of boxes that were filled with countless papers.
however, it came to a change of plans upon hearing chuuyas’ voice. usually, any sound that was made inside of the classrooms was drowned out and barely audible to hear outside the room. 
this time, that didn’t seem to be the case though. chuuyas’ screaming and dazais' hysterical laughter were faint but loud enough to hear from outside the room. 
“come on chuuya, there's no need denying it, you have a massive crush on them.” dazais’ voice was laced with amusement as he started laughing out loud which seemed to piss the redhead off. 
you were able to hear a small huff that escaped dazais mouth. “chuuya, there’s really no need to start getting all violent, just admit that you’re absolutely whipped for them!” the brunette chuckled. “so stop kicking me in the balls!” that probably earned him another kick as you could hear dazai letting out a small “ouch.”
“shut up, shitty dazai.” the guy in question only snickered at that. “yeah, yeah. everyone’s able to tell that you’re madly in love with them. every time you’re around them you start to get beet red, the color even exceeds the one of your hair! a hilarious sight to look at, really.” 
you didn’t hear a response from chuuya and apparently neither did dazai so he just continued his rant. “also, let me tell you one thing, you’re not making it any better by cussing them out or intently staring at them, that’s just scary, man!” dazai closes his eyes and starts shaking his head before tutting in disappointment.
“oh chuuya. the brunette sighs, eyes still closed. “letting a beauty like them slip away this easily by not showing any proper interest. you’re to be pitied, really.” the male moves away from his previous position and bolts over to the door, crossing his arms as his back leans against the door.
an exasperated sigh leaves chuuyas mouth. “what do you expect me to do then? they probably have a horrible impression of me already. if i pull up with a bouquet of roses and some cliché pick up lines, they’d probably stare at me in horror, wondering if i got possessed or something.” he sneers at dazai. 
just who in the world are they talking about?
dazai pretends to think for a moment before snapping his fingers. “well for starters, how about greeting them, doesn’t even have to be verbal, just some waving or nodding. then start hanging out with them!”
“idiot! how's that supposed to work from just greeting each other!” the ginger scowls at dazai.
“hold your horses.” the brunette whistles. “i didn't say to rendez-vous and have a candle-light dinner. how about accepting those group invites first that you keep declining. then you’d have the chance to meet up with them more often and get to know them.”
dazai continues to advise chuuya by giving him tips and recommendations “try bonding over stuff with each other, like favorite shows or food. and if you’re not incapable of doing so, how about complimenting them. wouldn't hurt you know?” dazai shrugs in simplicity. 
chuuyas still skeptical “assumingly that was the case. the two of us attending the same party, they’re alone and i finally get the chance to approach them, what the fuck am i supposed to say?” dazai only smiles at chuuya, a look that says “that’s up to you.” 
“why not use me as your lab rat!” dazai suggests optimistically.
“no way in hell!” chuuya shoots back pessimistically.
after pondering and musing for a while, chuuya comes up with a curt sentence. “i find you really good looking and cool.” the redhead stops and both you and dazai await his continuation in anticipation. “wanna go out and grab drinks sometimes?” chuuya doesn’t look up from the floor which he’s been staring at for the past minute. the tips of his ears tinted in a vermillion red.
“well, that wasn't so hard was it?” dazai asks cheerily, clapping his hands together. “if you still have doubts, how about you try it on the real thing now?” and before you can realize what's going on dazai swiftly steps away from the door before grabbing the door handle and opens the door, revealing your figure to the two guys. 
you’re not sure who's more taken aback, you or chuuya.
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e/n: as y’all can tell the title is inspired by frozen's love is an open door cause y’know dazai opens the door for chuuya to confess his feelings. does this make sense lol??
© TOORURS 2024. stealing, copying, translating, reposting my works on other platforms is not permitted.
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vanilladove · 3 months
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~ valentines with the bsd men!
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divider creds plutism
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ pairing: various bsd men x gn!reader [dazai, atsushi, ranpo, fukuzawa, nikolai, fyodor, sigma, bram, chuuya, akutagawa, oda, ango, jouno, tecchou]
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ genre: fluffy headcanons (some crack hehe)
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ content warnings: none! i also imagine all of them wearing suits🙈
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~武装探偵社 armed detective agency
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dazai osamu
planned out your valentines day date at work (got yelled at by kunikida)
buys you a nice outfit to match his suit and styles his hair like how it was in the dead apple movie o////o
after dinner, you both go on a moonlit walk around yokohama and stop by the bridge overlooking the river dazai asks you to commit a double suicide
you mostly enjoy each other's company in silence, and dazai just admires you (secretly taking pictures of you under the moonlight)
he whispers sweet nothings into your ear and you find yourselves at the Lupin bar
you both drink too much and show too much pda, giggling through the taxi ride home
you're awaited by a bed covered in rose petals, lingerie/boxers and more sake...🤭
atsushi nakajima
SUCH A FREAKING SWEETHEART
definitely didn't sleep at all the night before bc he was nervous about preparations (i'd like to think you're his first partner :3)
called akutagawa for help but he's also just as single...
ends up making you glitter roses (there's glitter all over his dorm now) and a valentines box filled with your favorite things ♡
he definitely has a cute speech for you about why he fell in love with you and how much he cares for you (one/both of you ends up in tears lol)
you guys end the night with a movie + lots of cuddles!
ranpo edogawa
valentines day is his second favorite holiday after halloween bc of all the candy + sweet treats associated with it
buys enough chocolate and snacks to feed yokohama (most of it is just for his secret snack collection...)
organizes a small at-home date where you both make chocolate-covered strawberries + heart-shaped treats
tried to prepare a romantic speech but it ended up being a 'why you're lucky to have me' speech...
gives you those cheesy 'i love you' candies + candy necklaces
you both get insane sugar crashes and don't even make it to dinner or the special valentines book scene he made poe write for you😔
fukuzawa yukichi
secretly very romantic
he takes you on a private picnic in a sakura tree field (it's literally perfect); you have bentos, plum sake, and daifuku. the cherry blossoms fall peacefully over you two ♡
would write a sweet poem/haiku for you and gift you a lavish yukata
you reminisce about the cute moments in your relationship and stay until sunset
you surprise him by taking him to a cat cafe on the way home hehe
~天人五衰 decay of angels
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nikolai gogol
thinks the traditional valentines day norms (chocolate, roses, and dinner) are boring
takes you to an amusement park (bonus if it's valentines-themed) instead
drags you with him on every ride--hopefully, you don't have motion sickness or a fear of heights
you eat so much fair food, and he never misses the chance to lick powdered sugar or cotton candy off your lips
takes you to the games section and laughs at your failed attempts. once you're frustrated enough, he wins even though the games are rigged and gets you a giant stuffed animal
you get matching face tattoos and braided hairstyles (he ends up doing it himself bc he's better than the employees lol)
on the ferris wheel, you both share an intimate kiss and he pulls out some roses (they end up being the clown ones though and splashing water all over your face :0)
fyodor dostoyevsky
asked you to be his valentine with one of those cheesy coding things (iykyk)
plans a romantic tea date for you both with lots of russian treats
composes a piece for you and plays it on his cello (forces nikolai and sigma to provide instrumental support in the background)
spends most of his time talking with you, since he's usually always busy
buys a matching ushanka for you, along with european chocolates, and your favorite flowers
you end up falling asleep in his arms reading together
sigma
this is probably his first valentines day ever so he spent a lot of time on social media to find out what people usually get for their partners
definitely uses the sky casino's amenities to put on an extravagant display for you--dancers/live music, a fancy bubble bath with rose petals + candles, couple's massage
has an intimate dinner with you in his office with the sunset in the background
he gifts you lego flowers that you end up building together and gets flustered if you gave him a gift, too♡
bram stoker
GOTHIC VALENTINES!!!!
takes you to his castle and prepares a fancy royal dinner for you
plays instrumental music from his radio but he didn't pay for spotify premium so you awkwardly listen to ads every few songs...😔
gives you pretty jewelry and black roses encased in glass (beauty in the beast style!)
takes you to the balcony and you both have an intimate night chat, which draws some rare smiles and chuckles from him
softly hugs and kisses you, grateful for your warmth and company will suck your blood if you let him
~ポートマフィアport mafia
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chuuya nakahara
the definition of a romantic bf...pls
first of all, you wake up with those gigantic boxes of roses that celebs always get, accompanied by a sweet handwritten letter and a custom outfit for the day
he then picks you up in his helicopter and flies you to a vineyard where you make your own wine and drink one he secretly made for you when you both started dating
at the vineyard, a PRIVATE CHEF cooks a fancy 5-course meal for you both to enjoy, and chuuya insists on feeding you the first bite
expect a lot of heartfelt, drunken speeches and passionate french kisses out of nowhere...
on the ride home, chuuya almost crashes the helicopter bc he's so drunk, but his ability saves you both hehe
he ballroom dances with you until you both fall asleep in each other's arms🥹
akutagawa ryunosuke
like atsushi and sigma, this is his first valentines. he asks chuuya for advice but thinks all his suggestions are corny
he ends up settling on making you some red baked goods with gin's help and dark chocolate candies
writes you love letters since he's secretly embarrassed to tell you outright how he feels
takes you on a beach date and lends you his coat if you're cold (he's secretly colder than you after he dips his feet in the water)
you hold hands and talk for a bit under the moonlight until he musters up the confidence to give you his letters and gifts
your happy reaction is worth it and makes him blush ^o^ he hugs you for a long time after you point it out, partly in embarrassment and partly because he loves you so much
chuuya and gin interrogate him about the date after he comes back lol
oda sakunosuke
picks you up from work with flowers, handmade chocolates, and a cute teddy bear
car makeout sesh before going home while you still have some time alone to yourselves
cooks your favorite meal for you and buys you your favorite alcohol
he and the kids bake + decorate a romantic cake for you (it's lowkey ugly but it's the thought that counts!!!) and decorate the house with heart balloons, cute drawings, and candles
you both eat with all the kiddos and sleep together on the same bed ♡
ango sakaguchi
almost forgot it was valentines day bc he was too absorbed in his work...his assistant had to remind him lol
takes you to a classic fancy dinner & buys you your favorite flowers
gifts you your favorite books and some sexy lingerie/boxers (his assistant probably snuck in some toys
your little date helps him relax for once and takes his stress away
gets clingy the next day and keeps trying to call/text you because he misses your presence (dazai and his coworkers tease him nonstop about it)
~猟犬 hunting dogs
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jouno saigiku
guys why are there no valentines day cards for these mfs does no one like them or what
takes you to a secluded place away from his annoying coworkers the noisy city
cooks you dinner and gifts you gold jewelry (likely a matching rope bell earring) and some soft sweaters :)
you try to play some board and card games together, but he wins everytime because he can guess your next move based on your heartbeat and movements
after you give up, you both just end up cuddling, and he rambles about his recent missions and office stories
showers you with kisses and caresses; purposely teases your pulse points to get a reaction from you
although you give him gifts (i think he would really like noise-cancelling headphones), his favorite one is your praise. he can't stop blushing when you list off all the reasons you love him hehe
tecchou suehiro
tecchou would take you on a romantic cabin getaway!
you go on a cute couple's hike (it's supposed to be along a heart shaped trail)
he's kind of directionally challenged and gets lost along the way...
as an apology, he gives you the chocolates he bought for you (they melted from the heat though)
he eventually finds his way through the surrounding landscape and you find a secret waterfall connected to a beautiful lake
you both go swimming to cool off and end up laughing off the whole situation
when you get back to the cabin, you order takeout (do not let this man cook) and look through the pictures you took on your hike
he gifts you some plum blossoms he picked on the hike ♡
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riiwrites · 4 months
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boyfriend!chuuya who…
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a/n : i’ve decided to make this into a series so please suggest who you’d like to see next :)
a/n : i tried to make this one gender neutral but it’s more hinted towards female reader as it’s mentioned when they first meet, but you can always just skip to the boyfriend part as always
warnings : stormbringer spoilers(?), mentions of insecurity
dazais version | atsushis version
masterlist | taglist | main page
dividers belong to @/benkeibear !
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pre-boyfriend!chuuya who saved you when some scumbag from town took your purse/bag.
pre-boyfriend!chuuya who wasn’t even on duty that day and was browsing through town until he saw a very distressed you.
pre-boyfriend!chuuya who’s heart does a little flip when he sees you look up at him with tear filled eyes and a kind smile to say ‘thank you’ for retrieving your belongings and that you’re his hero.
pre-boyfriend!chuuya who’s eyes widen as he coughs a bit awkwardly and averts his gaze before saying..
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“Ah, uhm..don’t worry about it. Damn bastards like that don’ even deserve to be near the presence of a woman.” He says, slowly averting his gaze back to your glossy eyes. God, why was his stomach doing even more flips than he could ever imagine?
Your smile only grows wider as you reach into your once stolen purse/bag and pull out your phone, unlocking it and holding it out to him. He looks at it for a few moments before you speak.
“Let me make it up to you, next time I’m in town we’ll go out for a drink, it’s the least I could do.”
And to his own surprise, he reluctantly accepts, taking your phone and putting his phone number in, handing it back to you.
As if your smile could grow any bigger, it does.
“Chuuya, huh? I’ll see you around.”
As you turn around and walk away with his number saved, he stares at you from afar as you become a blur in the distance. He doesn’t know why he felt what he felt to someone random so fast, but he knew one thing. He needed to see that smile again.
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pre-boyfriend!chuuya who low-key keeps checking his phone every now and again to wait for your text, eyes widening slightly as he sees you have.
pre-boyfriend!chuuya who can’t help but let out a little smirk and chuckle as he reads your texts.
pre-boyfriend!chuuya who finally takes you out on a few dates and by the third one, you’re finally his.
boyfriend!chuuya who doesn’t do much physical touch at first, wanting to be respectful.
boyfriend!chuuya who begins to wrap his arm around your waist or shoulder in public when you give him the green light.
boyfriend!chuuya who has his hand on your thigh when you’re sitting down.
boyfriend!chuuya who holds your hand and does the thumb thing.
boyfriend!chuuya who never initiates affection unless it’s hand holding or waist holding because he doesn’t want you to be uncomfortable, but if you wanted that he’d give you what you want.
boyfriend!chuuya who holds your cheek in his palm and strokes your tears away when you’re crying.
boyfriend!chuuya who gives your hand a reassuring squeeze when you’re anxious in public or in general.
boyfriend!chuuya who likes to take you out to fancy dinners, not all the time but on occasions.
boyfriend!chuuya who separates his work life from his love life, so you don’t become a target.
boyfriend!chuuya who wishes the flags were here to meet you.
boyfriend!chuuya who picks you up from any place during night, forcing you to wait there as he doesn’t want you to walk home yourself.
boyfriend!chuuya who trusts you to go out by yourself and do what you want as long as you’re not in danger, but would like a checkup every few hours.
boyfriend!chuuya who doesn’t judge you for what you wear, thinks it’s his choice and whoever has a problem can take it up with him.
boyfriend!chuuya who doesn’t care because he knows how to fight.
boyfriend!chuuya who kisses your knuckles as a greeting when he sees you.
boyfriend!chuuya who cleans your apartment/house for you for when you come back home.
boyfriend!chuuya who dates to marry
boyfriend!chuuya who never lets either one of you go to bed angry or upset.
boyfriend!chuuya who actually talks it out and wants you to speak to him when somethings wrong.
boyfriend!chuuya who always takes you drinking with him, having you try different ones to pick the best choice.
boyfriend!chuuya who keeps in mind which one is your favourite as it is now his go to drink.
boyfriend!chuuya who’s favourite sign of affection is kisses.
boyfriend!chuuya who rests his chin on the top of your head when sleeping.
boyfriend!chuuya who buys you a expensive and specific perfume so that he can remember your scent.
boyfriend!chuuya who always gets you flowers when you go on a date, it’s a must.
boyfriend!chuuya who lets you sit on his lap whilst he does work, resting his chin on top of the top of your head as he scribbles away.
boyfriend!chuuya who easily carries you when you’re too tired to walk or if you’re about to step in mud or a puddle.
boyfriend!chuuya who puts his jacket on the concrete floor so you can step on it just so you don’t get your shoes dirty.
boyfriend!chuuya who can read you like an open book, instantly noticing you’re upset.
boyfriend!chuuya who kisses your insecurities.
You were in the changing room with him as you were trying on different clothes, him with a slight smile and you with a very noticeable frown. Chuuya can’t help but notice as he also reflects your expression, coming up behind you and wrapping his arms around your stomach, peering over your shoulder.
“What’s wrong, doll?” He asks, clear concern evident in his voice and on his face.
“I just..” You start, unable to finish your next few words.
“You just..?”
“Feel so ugly..” You mumble.
Chuuyas expression shifts to a concerned look to a rather confused one, furrowing his eyebrows as he fully turns you around by the shoulders to face him.
“Don’t say that shit ever again.” He says sternly, noticing the way your bottom lip wobbles and your eyes become glossy once again. He takes your hand in his and begins kissing your knuckles, then kissing up your arm, then to your neck and then to your face. He kisses your nose before pulling away.
“Do you even know how much I love this damn face?” He begins, kissing your two cheeks and chin as you begin giggling, sniffling as tears stroll down your cheeks like a gentle waterfall.
“I can’t even begin to talk about how much I’m in love with this perfect face and body. Sometimes, i don’t understand why you’d wanna go for a guy like me..” He finishes, smiling comfortingly as he strokes your hair as you cry softly with a sweet smile on your face.
“I-..I love you, Chuuya..”
He pauses, his smile fading as his expression becomes surprised, but then his face lighting up as he picks you up and spins you around the small cubicle, you squealing.
“And I love ya too damn much.”
boyfriend!chuuya who realises after that he’s head over heels for you.
boyfriend!chuuya who talks about you to Kouyou, wanting to know how he can make you the happiest.
boyfriend!chuuya who believes you deserve the world, so he’s gonna give you it.
boyfriend!chuuya who in a world full of boys.. - he’s a gentleman. ❤︎︎
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TAGLIST : @hauntedsol @hopefulpain @forgotten-blues @ruru-kiss @texas-bitch-yee @lvstyangel @thetizzler @is-therelife-onmars @atlasnessie @101strawberries101 @reesesnieces @suzurans-world @mackereland-slug @heartsfourdazai @iratherowan @onlinewhisper14 @nomnomventi @silverbladexyz @inojuuy @boarcide @poedostoevsky11 @kissesmellow21 @star-light18464 @aliyahgracedrawing @chuuyathehatrack @boredwithwrath @akutagawasimp87 @rainy-dazie @lone-ray @ishqani @fun-cats @wefureko-blog @hoicacti @endy917 @dazaiiiosamuu @seikkoh
white = unable to be tagged :(
@/riiwrites reblogs are always appreciated ❤︎︎
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aureatchi · 6 months
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˚୨୧ 。 ˚ IT WAS A NIGHT TO REMEMBER . — osamu dazai
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⟢ SYNOPSIS. after a long week of work, you and your best friend retreat to a bar to distract yourself from your responsibilities. however, you find it unfulfilling and decide you need to just go home. as you head out the door, you bump into someone more than familiar.
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a/n. it’s the way i immediately thought of him when i first heard this song. <3
info. fem!reader. exes to lovers!au. we have the full recipe…fluff; light angst; gets really sugg. mentions of drinking; scars. your best friend hates dazai. hc dazai doesn’t bandage his tummy. (ᗒᗜᗕ) ノ wc. 3.6k
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“It’s just a lot.”
You just finished the final shift of your job for the week, and you were more than exhausted and burnt out. You had called your best friend immediately after to get some comfort, and despite how busy she was, she agreed to meet you for some drinks and listen to you rant.
“My coworker’s getting on my last nerve,” you continued venting. You had already told her about select crappy people you had to interact with during the day and then your boss, who regarded you with no empathy whatsoever. “Today’s already been bad enough, and then she decides to just pile more stress on me.”
You swished the ice around your emptied glass, creating clanking sounds while coating the cup in water.
“Maybe you should just quit,” your friend replied, taking a sip out of her glass. “I would’ve been long gone if I had to deal with annoying people all around, nine to five.”
She looked up at you. “Besides, you’re well off anyway. I don’t see why you’re working. Are you…trying to distract yourself?”
You sighed. She knew you too well.
“Love, don’t tell me you’re still hung up over—“
“It’s not what you think,” you cut her off, yet you avoided eye contact. It was easier to lie that way. “I just feel I’d have too much free time on my hands. I’m not sure what I’d do with it.”
You let out a dry chuckle. That wasn’t wholly false in itself, either. At your age, everyone had their own things going on—your best friend being an example. Therefore, you couldn’t find much time to go out with any of your friends, and you weren’t interested in meeting new people either.
You could blame your job. Perhaps the ones you meet every day put a sour taste on your tongue, making you lose any desire to interact with strangers. You could blame your exhaustion. Or…
“Honestly, I think that calls for someone new in your life,” your friend replied. “That’ll surely cure your boredom.”
“No thanks. I don’t feel like dating anyone right now.”
“I’m just kidding,” she laughed. “But it’d help you feel less lonely, no?”
“…you didn’t believe my answer to your earlier question, huh?”
“No. Of course not.”
It had been over five months since you broke up with your boyfriend. You tried seeing people after that, but in truth, you were only using them to try to move on.
Once you realized that it wasn’t working and it wasn’t fair for others to play with feelings, you decided to take on a new job on the other side of the city so you’d still get out of your house and have a change of scene.
“…But you know what? Screw him. I will keep saying again and again, I hate that man. Suicidal maniac. I know it’s hard, but you’re too hot to keep dwelling on this. You need to learn to move o—”
Your friend’s phone suddenly buzzed, interrupting her little lecture.
She picked it up, and you waited for her to finish speaking.
“I’m sorry, I think I got to go. I left my boyfriend with my cat, and he just told me he lost her already…” she shook her head. “Have you gotten out everything you wanted to say?”
“Yeah, thanks,” you replied. “I think I’ll go home soon, too. Not really feeling it.”
She stood up, handing you a bill with a smile. “Drinks on me tonight. Don’t complain—I’m sorry I couldn’t stay longer. And we didn’t order much anyway.”
“That’s okay; I appreciate you coming to listen to me anyway,” you replied.
“The offer is still open, by the way! If you want to find someone, I’ll schedule a date by this weekend.”
You rolled your eyes. “Whatever. Thanks.”
You only had one more drink before you decided to leave, still mostly sober—you figured it’d just be best if you’d take care of yourself at home.
Another thing your job was also distracting you from was witnessing all the relationships around you. Your friend had to go home for her boyfriend. You noticed a few couples at the bar you were at. You’d probably see more when you walked outside.
Not that you minded, is what you tried to tell yourself every single time. You didn’t have to be with someone. It’s okay to have a break.
But was it okay to still have a particular person at the back of your head all the time?
You stood up, leaving the bill and tip for your bartender before you walked toward the door. Opening it caused the bell attached to it to jingle. You were greeted by a cool, night breeze—and someone’s torso.
“O-Oh, sorry,” you replied, too tired to even catch the face of the person you bumped into.
But you had no choice when the man didn’t move out of the doorframe to walk in or allow you to pass.
So, when you met the almost-surprised, caramel-kissed eyes on a face framed with dark brown bangs and wavy hair, you felt your heart plunge into your stomach.
You whispered his name—almost scared to say it, the syllables feeling foreign from not having spoken it aloud for months.
“…Osamu.”
He was halfway through saying your name when you dashed for the exit, shoving him aside and speed-walking out.
“Wait! Bel—“ he caught himself and shouted your name once more.
You started walking down the parking lot, unsure of where you were trying to go, except away—away from Dazai. You had forgotten this bar was in the heart of the city. You didn’t know Dazai came to this one, but you knew his work was somewhere close.
“Hey!” you felt a breeze behind your back, and then a hand gently land on your shoulder, stopping you in your tracks.
“What…why are you following me?”
You turned around, getting your second full view of your ex for the night.
His hair was a bit longer. He still had those bandages on his neck—did he bother to change them out recently? His scent was as still as you remembered—grassy and toasty, a resemblance to green tea.
“I’m not sure why I’d leave a girl I know to walk alone at night,” he shrugged. “It’s dangerous!”
You continued walking, not responding to his reply.
“Where are we going?”
“Who’s we?”
“Aw, that was really rude.”
You ignored Dazai, making sure your stroll stayed a few feet in front of him.
You then entered a park, him trailing behind you.
“Why were you at the bar alone?”
“That’s none of your business.” You walked down the path, trees casting dark shadows onto the grass under the moon’s light.
“…And I wasn’t alone the entire time. I was with a friend, but she left to attend something.”
Dazai nodded, trying to catch up to your face. You immediately gave him more than enough space when he reached you, not wanting any invasion of your personal space.
“But you usually don’t drink unless you’re either celebrating or stressed,” he said. “And from what I’ve seen, it looks like the latter.”
You stopped again. “Again, it’s none of your business. Maybe you should focus on yours. You go and drink tons when you’re stressed, too.”
“Hey, I’ve actually gotten better at that…”
“You still ended up at a bar midweek.”
“But I didn’t even go in, no? I’m with you at a park right now.”
You were silent once again. But now you couldn’t complain that he was following you.
Why do I care if he drinks or not?
No. It’s normal. You’d care for the well-being of anyone you know.
You approached a set of swings in the center of the park. It had been ages since you’d been on one, swinging back and forth in carefree.
“Want me to push you?” you heard Dazai over your shoulder when you examined the equipment.
“Heck no,” you responded.
“Why not? It’d be fun!” He moved closer.
“No! I’m not sure if it’d even carry me,” you laughed. “It’s for kids.”
“You can try it. Just sit. And I’ll catch you if it breaks—“
“Shut up. I can catch myself.” You lowered yourself onto the seat, seeing that the metal poles did hold. You swung yourself a bit to test if it’d keep up your weight.
“It works.”
“Great! Can I push you now?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“I don’t trust you.”
“I won’t kill you, bel—I won’t! I promise.” Dazai childishly held out a pinkie toward you.
You sighed. “Fine. Just please don’t push me too high.” You clasped your pinkie around his.
“I got you!” You felt palms on your back, and then a light push that moved you forward, and then gravity pulled you back toward him.
Everything pulls me back to him—my mind and the universe both.
You were suddenly pushed higher, catching you off guard. You felt yourself fly multiple feet off of the ground, and you clutched the metal in panic.
“H-Help—Osamu!”
“You’re fine. You won’t fall,” Dazai chuckled. He pushed you again, sending you even higher than the previous time. You wanted to scream, but it came out more as a laugh.
“Is the thrill fun?” he asked while you were in the air, noticing your smile.
“Yeah, it is—HEY!”
Dazai had pushed you hard, sending you swinging all around the equipment, in a complete three-sixty.
“Osamu!” you cried, the momentum spinning you around once more. You couldn’t stop it—it was too fast.
You were clutched from behind, arms tightly wrapped around your torso to stop the swing. You could hear the sound of Dazai being dragged through the rocks below, but he was able to ground the both of you before you went flying again.
And you felt warm. Despite the evening’s cool air, you felt like you were encompassed in a fireplace’s heat on a winter day.
“Got you.”
You let out a giant exhale of relief. And then, you turned around in anger.
“I told you not to push me that high!”
“But I didn’t kill you, did I? You stayed on the swing the entire time! You were safe! Plus, I think you enjoyed it.”
You stood up, causing Dazai to let go of his arms. “I’m dizzy now.”
“Do you need water? We can buy some. And did you drive here?”
“No, I took a taxi.”
“Let me drive you home then,” he said.
“I think I’m fin—“
“Please,” he cut you off almost urgently, but then he caught his tone and reverted.
“I mean, many kidnappers disguise themselves as taxi drivers. Especially at night.”
“You’re still so cynical,” you replied. “Stop being so protective. It’s not like we’re…nevermind, sorry.”
You didn’t dare look at Dazai’s expression.
You each got a yogurt drink, and it helped soothe your dizziness immediately.
You walked by Dazai silently, but compared to earlier in the night, you were no longer repulsed to standing by him.
He opened his car door for you before getting in his seat on the other side.
“What have you been up to these past months?”
You asked as he found his keys, turning them into gear.
“A case. It’s something huge going on.”
Dazai’s work accounted for part of your breaking up with him. He was too secretive—despite you knew that he trusted you so much that he explained to you exactly what his job consisted of, and he only left details out to protect you from getting involved, you couldn’t handle it.
Maybe you were selfish for that. But you needed to know what your boyfriend was up to—if he was safe. Perhaps that was another reason why. You would never let him go if you knew of the exact danger he was volunteering himself in.
“I see. Sleeping okay?”
“If I do, sure.” He was suddenly reaching over your body, grabbing your seatbelt.
Your heartbeat fastened as Dazai hovered over you, pausing to look at anticipating eyes and a risky glance at slightly parted lips.
He sighed before fastening the buckle and moving away, acting like nothing happened.
You two drove in silence, you gazing out of the car window to admire how the city looked in the absence of the sun.
A song was suddenly put on. You looked at Dazai.
“Do you still like this song?”
“Yeah,” you replied. He had put on your favorite song, indeed.
You silently thanked him for it. The awkward tension to speak to one another had vanished; you could indulge yourself in music.
Until it ended, of course, but by then, you could see you were almost home.
“Osamu.”
“Yes?”
“This was a really bad idea. I hope I never see you again after this.”
“Probably, but maybe I wanted it to happen. Maybe I thought about you so much that I had to seize this opportunity.”
“What?”
“What if I hope to see you again after this?”
“You can go flirt with any other girl for entertainment.” He did a lot of that, too. Even if it was Dazai’s most efficient tactic for getting information, he had also said he simply couldn’t help it sometimes.
“I don’t find that interesting anymore.”
You looked at his distant, faint reflection through your window.
“…you think about me?”
You were answered with a nod.
Dazai turned, pulling you into your driveway.
“I’ll continue to even more after tonight,” he said. “Whether we see each other again or not. It plagues my mind every day. What I could’ve done better—how much you deserve that I failed to reach.”
He parked. “Of course, I’ve tried to move on. It’s the most fair thing to do for you. But if someone were to ask me, bella, saying that I don’t still love you would be a lie.”
“You’re selfish,” you commented.
“I know. I’m very.”
You opened the door, stepping out of the car.
“Thank you for driving me,” you said.
You walked towards your front door and then looked back at Dazai, who was standing by his side of the car.
You contemplated for a second.
“D-do you have something to do for the rest of the night?” you carefully asked.
“No.”
“Can you stay? Just for a bit. We can talk about things. And hopefully, you get some answers that will help you stop occupying your mind of me.”
You said that as if you were trying to convince yourself, rather Dazai.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.” You pushed open the door.
Dazai followed you as you walked through the house—through the hallway and to the kitchen.
“Do you want something to eat? Or drink?”
“I’m okay, thanks,” he replied.
“Alright. Uh…feel free to make yourself at home. I’m going to change, I’ll be right back.”
You walked into your room, first washing your face in the bathroom. You stared at your face through the window, noticing how pigmented your cheeks were.
Why did I do this?
You were in the middle of changing your pajamas when Dazai knocked on your door.
“Can I come in?”
“Uh—“ you hastily buttoned two thirds of your shirt before, “Yeah.”
A smell of your favorite scent immediately flowed into the room as Dazai came in. It was of the candles you had around your house.
“You lit my candles?”
“Yeah. I got curious because the flavors looked nice. I like them. The scent matches you perfectly.”
“Oh…thanks,” you mumbled. You didn’t know how else to respond.
Dazai glanced around your room. Some things changed—you had moved some things around, redone the decor on your nightstands, changed your bed sheets…what he didn’t know was that you actually donated them after the break-up so you would never see them again.
“Did you need something?”
“Yeah. Do you still happen to have bandages?”
“Yes.” You had Dazai sit on the bed while you searched your closet for the box of bandages you would keep for whenever he came over. Unlike your sheets, you had kept them for your emergency first aid.
Or in case he happened to be in an emergency.
“What do you think you could’ve done better?”
There was a silence right after. You had hit Dazai with a hard question first.
“I’d stop disappearing so much without warning. I only realized how much I took that for granted when we stopped seeing each other. I would try to communicate better…” He looked down. “I’m terrible at it, I know, but I would try harder.”
“Why me? You could move on and find some other girl to treat right the first time.” You found the box, pulling it out.
“Because I would feel like a loser,” he added your name to the end of the sentence. “I was a total jerk to someone who loved me, and then I decide to switch it up for someone new and pretend to start on a clean slate? No, bella—I’m cursed with not forgetting and forgiving myself of the past. It feels cowardly.”
“Osamu, stop. You hurt me, yes, but you weren’t the only one in the wrong.
“I-I’m sorry.” You hadn’t apologized to him yet, through months.
You noticed his eyes almost widen, surprised.
“And I also forgive you. It took awhile, but I’m forgiving you of the mistakes that hurt me,” you continued. “And I’m apologizing to you too. So please forgive yourself. You don’t need to feel guilt.
“It’s only fair to you as well to move on.”
“Why, bella? How is it fair? How is it fair when the only person I want to see is you?”
“Osamu.”
You were right in front of him, the closest you’d been to him that night, discarding how he had tightly hugged you on the swing earlier. You were drowned in emotion that surrounded his desperate pleas.
“Can you please bandage me?”
“Why?”
“I miss your touches.”
You regret asking. He had no shame in expressing his thoughts, no matter what you two were going through. You regret asking, yet…
“Your coat.”
You climbed behind and rid Dazai of the top portion of his clothes—his vest and dress shirt. Then, you started unwinding the bandages on his arms, chest, and neck.
Gently, your fingers grazed the scars that hid underneath his attire, and his mind. Months ago, you had learned what every single mark came from after knowing where each one was—it was one detail Dazai fully opened to you about.
You were thankful you couldn’t see scars of the heart.
He would have thrice as many. Perhaps one of them would include you.
You rewrapped Dazai, leaving only his stomach unbandaged. You moved to do his neck when he paused you with his eyes, mere inches away from his face.
“You still haven’t answered my question.”
You wish he weren’t so pretty. You would’ve been able to rationalize yourself quickly—you would’ve been able to give him a final answer without hesitating. But he ended up being the face of your dreams and the depth of your heart.
“I tell myself it’s fair,” you whispered. His nose was almost touching yours. “I tell myself it’s better that we’re done. But my heart isn’t so sure. It asks the same—how is it fair? To keep myself longing?”
Your arms were around Dazai’s neck with the bandage, yet you did not move to finish.
His gaze moved to your lips. A hand moved to your hair.
“Is it fair? If it truly is, push me away, bella.”
He didn’t force himself any closer, leaving you with the choice despite his yearning appearance. You could feel the warmth of his body on yours and the soft air of his breaths on your cheeks.
“Yes. It’s fair, Osamu.” You came to your conclusion.
Yet, you dropped the bandages, cupped his face towards you, and pressed your lips on his.
“But I’m selfish too.”
You moved your hands to waft through brunette locks as Dazai pulled you onto his lap. He held you tightly—desperate at the acceptance of your invitation.
Closer, along with the fresh scent of green tea, there was a note of sweetness as intoxicating as chocolate. You came to know this pleasant surprise every time you were pressed up against him, tucked well into his embrace.
A hand moved down your waist, tracing your curves. Meanwhile, his kisses became sloppier, changing course to your jaw.
“Bella,” he whispered.
“Osamu?”
“Too much? Just let me know.”
“Don’t stop.”
He planted his lips on your neck, leaving a mark when he moved to the next area.
“I don’t want to lose you again. I missed you so much.”
“I missed you too,” you replied, pulling him down over you.
“Everything about you,” Dazai continued. “It’s enchanting. How you smile when you’re flustered—like right now, and how you react when I touch you here…”
His hand found its way under your shirt, and you started laughing. He knew how and where to draw every specific reaction out of you, including where you were most ticklish.
“Osamu! Stop, hah-!”
You let him stay hovered over you and left his curious hands to wander your skin. Dazai looked free of emotional distress for once—being able to calm just by admiring you. It was like medicine.
“Do you still keep a spare pajama set?” he asked.
“Yes. However, the guest room is being renovated.”
“It’s fine. A couch was a luxury for me at one point.”
“Or you…could stay here. And you can have your favorite side, the side closer to the window.”
“Because I always see how the sun’s rays lay on your skin when I wake up,” he smiled. “And how spellbound your eyes make me when you open them and the light hits it.”
“You remember so much.”
“I told you how much I think about you, belladonna. I remember every night that I’m with you.”
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dazai listens to music w/ u if u rb. reblogs are cherished; they support me as a creator. <3
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© AUREATCHI 2023. no reposts or translations. do not steal.
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heartsfourdazai · 7 months
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๋࣭ ⭑ caught making out. bsd x reader
p2.
gender: gender neutral
type: short scenario/imagine
characters: dazai, chuuya, atsushi, and akutagawa (i will make a part two<3)
warnings: lowercase writing, make-out sessions, suggestive writng, not smut!
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๋࣭ ⭑ dazai had you pinned to the wall of the small cleaning closet in the agency. "out'of all the places.." you chuckled, feeling dazai's hot breath on your neck. you could feel his grin on your skin; "don't act like you didn't have the same idea~" you clutch a bunch of his hair and felt your stomach twist'n'turn. you laughed. "shut up and kiss me.." almost instantly you felt his lips smash onto yours, his arms snaked around your waist as he pulled you closer to him, your back arching slightly. a soft moan escaped your lips when you felt his hand grab your thigh, squeezing it every now and then yo get a noise out of you. all of a sudden, the door hitting dazai's back caused him to jump and bit your lip. you screamed in pain, pulling your head away from. the bright light from outside caused dazai to look over his shoulder to see kunikida....words couldn't explain the speechless look on his face. ironic. he clearned his throat, closing the door a little later....you could hear him stutter something along the things of, "he couldn't find the vaccum.." and dazai looked back to you slowly..."well.." he couldn't stop the small blush form to his cheeks, "dazai.." you started, licking your lip, "i think my lip's bleeding..."
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๋࣭ ⭑ chuuya had his mouth all over your neck, gently kissing it and sometimes taking a small nibble here and there. your whimpers was music to his ears. he wanted to hear more of it. "c-chuuya~" you whispered, his teeth nibbling your ear lobe softly. "chuuya, please! i want to kiss you!" you begged, already? you wrapped your arms tighter around chuuya's neck, his head moving ever so slowly away from your neck. "needy? are we?~" he teased, causing you to groan. he chuckled, complying to your wishes and connected his lips to your own. taking in the moment of your fingers tugging onto his hair. he licked your lower lip, however before you could open your mouth...the door of your bedroom suddenly opened causing chuuya to shriek and grabbed a blanket, throwing it over your body.. looking up, he saw dazai with a shocked face. in his hand were two bags of takeout and in the other was a tray of soft drinks. "bastard!" chuuya grabbed a loose pillow and tossed it at the man. dazai easily dodged it and smiled, "what a great way to welcome your ex-partner~ i almost feel loved~" he joked, sitting on the chair just in front of the bed. thank god you and chuuya didn't undress- "what the hell, man! it's 10:35! AT NIGHT!" "and i thought this would be a perfect time for a movie night!" dazai turns the television on. "besides~ it's not like i walked in on anything...or did i-?~" - "JUST CHOOSE A MOVIE, DAMMIT!"
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๋࣭ ⭑ atsushi waited until the room was empty, before he grabbed your shirt and pulled you in for a kiss. you were shocked, dropping your papers in hand and watched them scatter all over the carpet before your mind was racing. "atsu-" you tried to speak, but the moment his mouth reached your neck and licked it, you were at a lost for words. you whimper, your knees giving and fell on the couch, atsushi following you. pinning you to the cushions. his hand was resting behind your head, playing with your hair while his other hand creased your thigh up and down. "what's gotten-" you squirmed, feeling his neck give you one last kiss. "i needed this~" he blushed. he never saw himself doing this, but he needed to feel you. as you got into the moment, grabbing his hair and started to tug on it, getting him all railed up, the door burst open...ranpo's voice immedialy threw you outta your love trance, and you tried to push atsushi off you, but he hugged you tight, his face exteramly red. "ranpo! get out!" he screamed as ranpo made no reaction to what he just walked into, "just gimme a sec', i can't find myyyyyy-" he trailed, digging into a box full of candies and sweets, suddenly taking out a sucker! "aha! okay, i'm leaving now! don't get your tail in a knot, atsushi!" ranpo held is hands up, putting his lolipop in his mouth and thd door closed behind him. you had a blush on your face, chuckling seeing atsushi hide his face into you shirt. a whine left his lips as you rubbed his head. maybe next time.
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๋࣭ ⭑ akutagawa froze. here you were, wearing nothing but your ADA work shirt, already buttoned up, and black underwear. with a scream you tossed yourself back onto your bed and covered your body with the blanket. "a-aku! i didn't know you were- god dammit!" you blushed mad, your legs all shakey and your face hot. there was a moment of silence, making you go more red. did he leave? did he get to uncomfortable? he was the ine who walked in- but still, did he not like the why you looked? did you have to much fat- all of a sudden you felt the blanket slowly reveal yourself, your upper half visible to him and only him. without words, he crashed his lips onto yours and you felt your heart skip a beat. you thought he would've at lease said something!! ... "i'm sorry.." he kissed you again, and again, and again.. "i didn't know you were changing.." he apologized, tracing hid hand up your shirt and rubbed up and down your torso. you kissed him back, "such a gentlemen~" the blanket around your legs began to pull down, the cold air hitting your bare legs. before each of you could do anything, atsushi burst through your bedroom door..."y/n! i've been calli-"he froze. he stopped functioning. all of your were quiet. akutagawa was quick to cover your body with his owb, hugging you close and glaring deadly daggers at the boy. your face was in your boyfriends neck and you had a dark red blush decorating your face. "weretiger..." atsushi saw his life flash before his eyes and started to run out of your hallway, "AH! I'M SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN- I DIDN'T SEE ANYTHING!! AKUTAGAWA- YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN'T KILL ME FOR 6 MONTHS- WHAT WOULD DAZAI THINK-AH!" as your boyfriend chased atsushi around your home, you took your time to get changed and looked back at your phone to read 7+ messages from atsushi...saying you were gonna be late for work and he was here to pick you up...like you asked him to yesterday...shit.
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chososchalupa · 2 months
Note
Hi I love your writing! Could you write a bsd imagine if you’re their sister and they find out you’re dating their rival? especially Dazai and Chu!
Thank you so much! and of course! I love writing for bsd sm
Your brother finding out your dating their rival
F!Reader x Dazai, Chuuya, Akutagawa, Atsushi
WC - 276, 293, 210, 267
not proof read!
Dazai -
The light from your phone shined bright on your face as you checked the time
01:32
Your older brother, Dazai, was definitely asleep by now which means you could easily sneak out to go meet up with your boyfriend.
You carefully tiptoed through your living room, trying not to make any noise until you heard a cough from the kitchen. You paused your movements, hoping he wouldn’t notice you standing in the darkness.
“I know you’re in there. Stop acting like a statue” Dazai laughed as he called out from the kitchen, “Come here”
You groaned internally and walked towards the lit up room,
“Yes, Osamu?”
Your brother smiled at you, his eyes gleaming with something you couldn’t place.
“How long did you think you could keep this up before I noticed?” He asked swirling his drink around in his cup
“Keep what up?” you replied, if you kept the innocent act up, maybe he would drop it.
He chuckled deeply at your words, “Come on,” he started, “Did you really think you could hide dating Chuuya from me?”
Your eyes widened, you knew he would catch on to the sneaking out, but how did he know it was to see Chuuya?
Dazai must have sensed your confusion as he continued, “I can hear his motorcycle outside every night” You sighed, “Are you mad?”
“Mad? No. You could do better than that slug though. I’m sure he's waiting. Go have fun”
You rolled your eyes and gave your brother a soft smile before turning to leave
“Tell Chuuya~ I said hi”
You laughed before waving goodbye. 
He took it a lot better than you were expecting
Chuuya -
“How do I look?” You asked, walking into your brother's room.
“Another date?” Chuuya asked, looking at your outfit, “Same guy?”
You nodded before reasking your question, looking at yourself in his mirror.
“You look good. Who is this guy anyway?”
A blush crept onto your face as fixed your hair, ignoring his question.
“Uh, hello? Do I know him?” he asked
“Kinda?” You replied, looking at your phone to see a text from Dazai saying he was outside. “Gotta go! Love you!”
“What do you mean ‘kinda’?” He yelled as you walked out of his room
Chuuya got up from his bed and ran after you, “I’ll come meet him. I have to make sure you're in good hands after all” he smiled as he caught up with you.
You sighed deeply as you both walked to your front door, “You can’t be mad”, you spoke as you opened the door
“Why would I be ma- DAZAI?”
Dazai stood outside, smiling as you two walked towards him.
“You have to be fucking kidding” Chuuya whispered as the two of you stood in front of your boyfriend
“You look stunning as always, y/n. You too, Chuuya~” Dazai laughed as he wrapped his arm around you
You watched as your brother's face turned a deep red with anger.
“I can not believe this. You better not hurt her or I will kill you”
“I would never” Dazai smiled as he kissed your head. “We do have to go now though, we have dinner reservations”
You said your goodbyes to Chuuya as you and Dazai walked to his car
“I can not believe he didn’t murder you on the spot” you laughed as he opened the door for you
“He couldn’t even if he tried”
Akutagawa -
“Atsushi, you really don’t have to walk me all the way there” you said, walking hand in hand with your boyfriend to the Port Mafias headquarters. 
“I want to make sure you get there safely!” He smiled
The two of you began saying your goodbyes until you heard the angry voice of your brother behind you,
“Weretiger. What are you doing with your hands on my sister?”
You turned to respond but Akutagawa already had Rashomon wrapped around your boyfriend's arms.
“Let him go, Akutagawa. He’s not trying to hurt me”
Akutagawa sneered at your words, “That was obvious. What is he doing here? More importantly, why is he touching you?”
You sighed again before grabbing Atsushi’s hand and raising it up, “We’re dating”
Akutagawa's eyes widened as he stared at the two of you in shock
“Yeah, we have been for a while” Atsushi chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck
Akutagawa glared at him as he spoke, “If you hurt her, you will be dead, Weretiger.”
As your brother finished speaking, he turned and walked away, not bothering to look back at the two of you.
“Well that went….good?” Atsushi asked, watching your brother walk away.
“For him, that went great” you laughed, pressing your lips to his.
Atsushi -
“Aku, please stop twitching so much” you groaned, setting down your nail polish as your boyfriend glared playfully at you.
The two of you were sitting on your bedroom floor, you had convinced Akutagawa that he would look amazing with eyeliner and painted nails and somehow, the eyeliner went on easier than the nail polish did. 
“I am trying. I’ve never had this done before”
You smiled up at your annoyed boyfriend as you brought his hand back down, “One hand left”
You went to pick up the black polish when you heard the apartment door open, 
“Y/N” Your brother called, “You home?”
Akutagawa looked up at you with wide eyes before mouthing, “Do not say a thing”
You giggled softly as you nodded, continuing to paint his nails.
The two of you sat in silence until you heard footsteps walking towards your room,
The door opened and Atsushi stood holding a box of cookies, “Hey, I went to the store and got some coo- Oh, Hey, Akutagawa. What are you doing here?”
“I am-” your boyfriend started before you interrupted, 
“Atsushi! I didn’t think you’d be home so early. My boyfriend and I are just painting his nails. Don’t they look great?” You asked, lifting up Akutagawa's hand
Atsushi smiled, despite looking very confused, “Boyfriend?” He whispered to himself, “Uh, Yeah. They look great, Akutagawa. I’ll leave the cookies on the counter”
You both waited until Atsushi shut your door before bursting into laughter,
“That was an interesting way of telling him” Akutagawa laughed
“It was now or never” You smiled, “I knew he wouldn’t mind”
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chiara-hotel · 4 months
Text
Vampire AU!
Characters: Chuuya, PM!Dazai, ADA! Dazai
Warnings: Mention of Blood, Suicide, Starving, Marking
Spoilers: S5, Chapter 111.5
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Chuuya:
- Chuuya lives within the darkness already due to his job in the mafia, so having no access to sunlight doesn’t bother him
- Of course it does interfere with a few missions but he has other subordinates he can send for him
- He’s not a heavy drinker surprisingly, Chuuya can go a whole day without drinking blood
- Usually he drinks blood though his wineglass so it doesn’t seem too suspicious
- No one notices, unless they know its blood or have a keen eye
- Though if he’s on a mission to kill he’ll drink directly from the source
- Chuuya is obsessed with your blood too, if you’ll let him he’d gladly oblige to drinking yous
- Whenever your neck has a bite marks on it he gives you his choker to hide the marks (also so no one asks questions)
- For others, they’d also just see you wearing his choker as a symbol your taken by him, which he also loves aswell
- His fangs are tiny & cute, they look similar to what they looked like when he faked being a vampire
- They’d look so cute though
- Sometimes he threatens the port mafia’s enemies with his fangs and they get scared off
- Or even threaten them by trying to drink their blood
- Usually it works, if it doesn’t then hes always hungry for more food
- When he goes to pretend to be a vampire, its easier now that he actually is one
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PM! Dazai:
- Oh boy this man is even more sadistic
- Dazai loves to drink your blood, he refuses to have anyone elses after he starts dating you, he’d rather starve than drink off of someone else
- Dazai also threatens his victims that he’ll suck their blood, 9 times out of 10 it works
- When that 1/10 chance happens, he shoots the person instead, he can’t betray you and drink someone else’s blood now can he?
- Loves biting you and seeing his marks on your skin
- Not to mention he loves lying you down & hugging you while he bites
- Bites your wrist or thighs the most
- If any bite marks fade you bet he’s remarking you in the most obvious places
- Yes, he’s tried garlic as a suicide method (he hated it, was in a lot of pain, now bans garlic from everywhere)
- Dazai takes you on every mission as an excuse if he “needs blood” because he won’t want to “underperform” now would he? he just wants to hug you and will miss you
- As a vampire, he’s also very clingy (even though he’s already clingy…. hes extra clingy)
ADA Dazai:
- Not too different
- Whenever hes bored at work and your busy working he convinces you that hes starving at that exact moment so he needs to feed on you
- Especially right after he finishes a mission, dragging you into the nearest alleyway to bite into you
- Although, due to his inability to walk in the sun you guys only do nightmissions
- And throughout the day, he cuddles you while going to sleepover
- Every so often he makes you buy groceries and such as he can’t walk outside
- But while your out he gets lonely and doesn’t let you leave his grip for an hour
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universallychaoticpan · 10 months
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Walk me home~
bsd men walking you home when you're (both) drunk
(TW for brief references to alcoholism.)
(Dazai, Chuuya, Kunikida)
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It wasn't like you had a low tolerance or anything; seriously, you could drink most people you knew under the table. But between the rich warmth of the summer night making you feel alive and the Dazai's deceptively adorable smile, you'd both passed tipsy about an hour ago.
But he was still in the right frame of mind to know there was no way in hell he was letting you walk home alone in the middle of the night. Nope. Kunikida could think he was an idiot all he wanted, but he had enough common sense (even while drunk) to know that that was a bad idea. And even though he trusted you to protect yourself, weapons and abilities hardly ever mixed well with alcohol.
Thus began your stumble back to your apartment, the two of you cackling madly every time you bumped into one another. Suddenly, all of his stupid joked were just hilarious, and his kisses tasted sweeter than nectar. He kissed you against streetlamps, sent you both tumbling into alleys as he tried to kiss you against walls, twirled you around as you giggled like a child. At a normal time, passersby would've scoffed at your behavior, and for good reason. But it wasn't a normal time- it was the middle of the night when the moon burned bright and high in the sky, when the taste of liquor on your tongues complimented the gleam in your eyes perfectly.
You were happy, giddy, in love- the night was warm and seemed to e holding its breath, waiting for something magic.
But you collapsed into the doorway of your apartment, still giggling between one another, his shirt collar in your fist as you pulled him into a kiss.
The next morning, you would wake up on the floor, his coat draped over you like a blanket as you used his chest as a pillow, his hand in your hair and a headache in your skull. But the morning didn't matter. All that mattered was your laughter, his mouth, and the stars swimming in your eyes, bright as galaxies.
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You had been at the Mafia party for almost four hours now- that was after it had taken Chuuya days to convince you to go in the first place. But finally, you'd gotten dressed, fixed your hair, taken his breath away and attended on his arm.
And somehow, you managed to drink enough fine wine that your cheeks were flushed and your hair was falling fetchingly around your face.
You stood on the mezzanine of the grand room, watching people mingle and laugh below, listening to the soothing hum of chatter as you raised your glass to your lips again. Before you could take a longer sip, you felt a cool, gentle hand pulling the glass away.
"They really should warn people how easy it is to loose self control with this stuff." Chuuya's voice was like a balm on your hot skin as he slid his arm around your waist, standing beside you as he finished your glass. "You've had what, three glasses? And you've got that dreamy, far away look- like your just gonna close your eyes and float away." He snorted. "If I was a better person, I'd regret dragging you here."
You laughed, the sound escaping your lips like the ringing of bells.
"Don't be mad," you smiled. "if anything, be happy i now understand your appreciation for finery."
He smiles. "You're the finest thing in my life, so how about I get you out of here before we regret staying longer."
Too sleepy to argue, you let him lead you out of the grand room, the glitter of the party soon replaced by the gleam of the city at night. You stared out of the window of your car as you leaned against his shoulder, watching the city rush past in a blur of color and light, your eyes half closing as the warmth of the wine flowed through you.
"you know something?" you mused, only half conscious as Chuuya's hand rested gently on your shoulder. "Feeling like this..it's no wonder people are alcoholics."
Chuuya chuckled in spite of himself. "You wanna know something? When I tell you all about everything you said tonight in the morning, the look on your face is going to be sweeter than any wine."
You snorted, pushing at him playfully. "You're such a dick," you smiled.
"Yeah? Well I love you." He pressed a kiss to your forehead as you rested your head on his chest, a yawn forcing itself out of you.
"Shut up," you murmured, though not unknindly , the smile on your lips evident in your voice as you drifted off.
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Kunikida had no idea how he'd gotten here.
The evening had been normal enough- some of the older agency members sticking around to chat after work, namely Dazai, Ranpo, Yosano, you, and himself. Then chatting turned to dinner, the five of you eating in a circle in the middle of the room. Then, dinner had turned into Dazai running out of the office in a hurry, returning ten minutes later carrying several bottles of cheap booze. After that- well things had gotten strange.
Kunikida wasn't a lightweight, but he also had a sort of self control the rest of you seemed to have lost. He sat on his chair, watching the rest of you roar with laughter at the stupidest things, watching you make up drinking games, watching you forget your troubles as you drank among friends.
But of course, all good things had to end. Eventually, everyone said their goodbyes, and went their separate ways. Which left you and Kunikida alone to walk the short distance to his apartment.
Now.
You weren't unsteady on your feet, but you had a tendency to wander even when sober. Whatever had been in your cup hadn't made that any different, so he made sure to keep his hand wrapped around yours lest you stumble into a light pole. He smiled in spite of himself as you mumbled happily to yourself, swinging your clasped hands between the two of you.
"You're an oddly adorable drunk you know," he muttered, a small, affectionate smile gracing his usually serious face.
"I don't have the slightest idea what you're talking about," you replied, turning around and placing your hands on your hips like a pouting child. "I'm adorable all the time."
Kunikida snorted, but he didn't disagree as he walked you up the stairs to your place.
He let you get into bed and was about to go finish a few things when you reached out- reaching for him.
"Stay" you mumbled, face squished against your pillow. "Want you to stay here."
"Come on, y/n, I'll be back in a minute- just have to finish some things."
"Nope. Here. Now"
You stared at each other for a second, your eyes still challenging even in your giggly, drunken haze. Finally, he relinquished. You were the only one he'd do that for.
"You're such a brat you know," he said as he got into bed beside you, pulling you into him.
"Yeah I know," you replied.
"But you love me."
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lemon-ghostea · 2 months
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AU where Kunikida Chuuya and Sigma form a “was at some point Dazai’s partner” support group where they drink and bitch about Dazai (Sigma wasn’t his partner but gets honorary membership for everything that happened in Meursault)
more rambling/ headcannons under the cut!
Their drinking habits :
Kunikida— responsible, only has a couple drinks (beer? Whiskey? Something straightforward like that). Usually the good one that doesn’t overdo it unless Dazai has really pissed him off that day. It only happens occasionally but when it does he goes wild and is an emotional drunk. When this happens even Chuuya holds back on drinking a bit bc someone has to be able to lug this guy back at the end of the night
Chuuya- I mean we know his canonical drinking habits. Orders a bottle of fancy wine, his alcohol tolerance is on the lower side but he keeps going anyways. The only way for him to handle thinking about Dazai for this long is to drink heavily but he wants to take the opportunity to bitch about him so this is the solution
Sigma— despite being the owner of a casino I don’t think he’s drank a lot (he’s the manager so he has to be aware of what’s happening). He does have an id that Nikolai forged for him tho so when he joins the group he starts the process of trying a bunch of different drinks. The first night no one warned him about mixing alcohols and he got a different drink every round and got super sick. Now he just tries a different drink each meetup and how many drinks he gets depends on how much he liked/didn’t like what he ordered. Usually is responsible and handles drinking well unless he orders something he really likes (probably a cocktail) and forgets it’s alcohol. He’s a tamer drunk than the other two tho I think. Either a silly drunk or a sleepy drunk. Bc he’s known Dazai the least amount of time he sometimes naturally falls into that supportive friend role of listening to the other two and getting offended on their behalf. Altho I’m sure Dazai still finds ways to make time to bug Sigma so it’s not like he doesn’t have any stories
Speaking of Dazai there’s no way he hasn’t crashed these meet ups before. All his people he likes to annoy are conveniently in one place! ^ ω ^ they have to keep switching up bars/ locations to try and keep him away (to minimal success so far)
Regarding Sigma: I think in this au he made it out of Meursault bc Dazai and Chuuya got him out and he’s woken up. He’s worked with the ada to tell them what he learned, etc but hasn’t fully joined bc he thinks maybe it would be better to just fully live a normal life. Dazai still bugs him and stuff, and when Chuuya one day is also there when this happens he invites him to join him and Kunikida in their routine bitchfest. Sigma goes despite not really trusting either of them (afraid of getting used, clearly knew of chuuya before and saw him as a threat). He gets more comfortable over time tho and they become something like friends (?).
I think it would be funny if Sigma did eventually become an ada member but by Kunikida’s recommendation rather than Dazai’s. Honestly I think Sigma not joining from the beginning would be because Fyodor was the one to say that he wanted to join the ada so he’s now resistant about it, though also it’s because he’s afraid of being used again. He’s just a little conflicted at first.
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libraryraccoon · 2 months
Note
I was wondering how a Dazai!Reader from BSD (preferably 15 year old Dazai) would interact with the HH crew
Btw, I love your stuff sm, have a lovely day if you see this!
Gender : GN
Pronouns : None
Info : I haven't watched BSD for a long time, so it's probably wrong/inaccurate, sorry. Reader have 15 years old.
Message fom Raccoon : What ? Dad!Lucifer ? Dad!Alastor ? Okay, take that Dad!Husk !
TW : Suicide (mentionned); SH (mentionned)
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General Headcanon
Finally.
After all this years of trying, after all this attempts, you were finally dead !
And what do we do when we have achieved such a feat ? We drink until the morning !
As you drank, you recounted your feat of finally dying to the bartender, some sort of cat-bird demon.
He gave you a judgmental look when you told him you were 15 and died of suicide.
But you were used to it, people often judge you while you were alive and was trying every second to die.
After a few hours, you were drunk and followed the bartender back to his place, a small apartment in a quiet corner of Hell.
You shouldn't follow someone to their home, you know that, but for your defense, you were drunk and he was a cat. And you have a weakness for cats.
Two things making it impossible to refuse his invitation.
And, if anything ever went wrong, you always had your gun with you, which had appeared at the same time as you in Hell.
The bartender's name was Husk and he kind of adopted you ? You weren't even sure if one sinner could adopt another sinner.
Life was calm with Husk, and you somehow helped him with his work.
By that I mean you were stopping the powers of other demons with your power, so you used it to kick out all the assholes who attacked him from the bar.
You and Husk had this dynamic of "Father who will kill for his child & Child who will sacrifice themselves for their father."
And then, one day you had to move to the Hazbin Hotel because Husk find a work there.
Alastor was surprised to see that Husk now had a kid–he didn't think it was possible for an alcoholic like him to have a child.
And he learned that Husk had cut down on his drinking, so he could be a better father.
*very kindly and not at all suspiciously notes this fact in the back of his mind.*
The hotel was quite shocked to know that you were a child from a fucking mafia and that you had died of suicide at 15 years old. If Husk hadn't informed them about that, they never would have suspected it.
Your humor worries them more than anything else.
Charlie is worry every time you make jokes about suicide while your dad rolls his eyes at it.
Husk was used to your jokes after a few months of living together.
The hotel wasn't.
Charlie is like your older sister, optimistic and a little naive at times.
She always tries to make you see the bright side of things and to make you forget this idea of double death.
Spoiler : it doesn't work.
Lucifer sees you like one of his children.
He spoils you like he spoiled Charlie when she was just a child.
Husk often makes side eyes at him, accusing him of trying to steal his child.
And that was true.
Lucifer, Charlie, Husk and Angel Dust are the ones who are the most concerned about your mental health.
Alastor wanted to make you sign a contract "I become powerful and Alastor releases my father from his contract in exchange of stopping trying to kill myself."
You didn't sign it.
Alastor tried to use you to spy on Vox and the Vees because he was bored and wanted some entertainment.
It worked.
Alastor do radio shows with you sometimes, you two are called "The RadioDuo".
His audience LOVES you.
You gained Alastor some listeners btw.
You help Niffty with her work at the Hotel.
Even if Charlie said you didn't have to do it, you do it anyway.
Vaggie take all your guns because you apparently “didn’t need” them.
You managed to recover them with a little manipulation.
Angel Dust could see himself in you.
You reminded him of his little human self, Anthony, broken by the world and wanting to end it. A family running the Mafia and forcing him to join it.
You're a bit like him, but compared to him, who fought to survive, had a reason to survive, you had nothing, no reason to fight, and you gave up.
When Angel Dust isn't working, he usually stays with you and Husk.
He doesn't want to abandon you, leave you alone in such a rotten world. He wants you to be protected and to be the child you never could be.
He will never let anyone touch you, never.
Husk and Angel Dust are usually the ones who bandage you after SH, Angel Dust doesn't say anything as he does it, because he understands. Husk doesn't speak as well, but you can see that by doing so he's blaming himself, making you instantly regret it.
Don't try to kill yourself in front of them, please. They're already worried enough, don't add more.
Hotel Hazbin was, in a way, your family.
And you would kill everyone in this room before killing yourself before anything happened to them.
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oikasugayama · 4 months
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omg i love your drabbles! Could you please do something (charr, hcs or drabble) about the bsd men (pls incluse nikolai!) with fem reader who squirts? Was it a surprise, were they absolutely trying to get it to happen, are they into it?
OKAAAAAAAAY, let's go: he fucks you until you squirt. how does he react?
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It's his goal to make you squirt, and he loves it when you do.
Ranpo (drinks squirt like it's the elixir of life; if you don't squirt he won't stop stimulating you until you do. He wants it all over his face, he wants it dripping down his chest. He is the #1 squirt fan and will die on this hill), Chuuya (loves pleasuring women, and he knows that making someone squirt is to get them to reach an elevated sense of pleasure. He wants you to feel as good as possible, so he loves to make you squirt), Dazai (knows how the body works, knows how to pleasure it, and enjoys teasing; most of the times you squirt with Dazai are after he's edged you for quite some time and your body can't take it anymore), Jouno (is cocky and thinks you need to squirt because he's doing a good job. If you don't squirt he feels like he isn't doing well enough so he takes you another round and maybe another until you do), Tetcho (also thinks that you squirting is a reflection of his sexual ability, so he pushes you to the farthest edge every time so you both feel good), Kunikida (heard that squirting feels extra good for his female partner, so he wants to try. He studies how to do it, practices with you, and can reliably squirt when you want to; it's awfully messy, though, so it's not something you two do a lot), Ango (just loves fucking you so much that you two accidentally found out that you can squirt, and now when Ango is in another desperate, hooked-on-you kind of mood and he won't stop fucking you, he knows you'll squirt (and he typically puts down a barrier on the bed to prevent it from seeping into the mattress), Tachihara (knows you can do it because he tried the first time, but he's satisfied with that knowledge, he doesn't need to do it a lot and you don't seem to care about doing it much either).
He doesn't expect you to squirt at all, but when you do he loses his mind for it.
Junichiro (is right behind Ranpo as squirt's biggest fan after you accidentally do it once; it makes him go absolutely feral and he laps it all up. He instantly tells you he wants you to do it again, but you struggle to replicate it), Atsushi (only briefly once heard of squirting so he's confused, but you explain that it's a good thing and he feels proud and wants to make you do it again), Nikolai (knows he pleasures you very well regardless of if you squirt, so it's not a goal of his but he does like when it happens by surprise), Fukuzawa (thinks squirt seems very pornographic and almost unreal; he likes it if you like it, and he won't try to stop it, but he doesn't like the mess and he isn't eating it), Poe (thinks he'd like to make it happen but doesn't so much think he can get you to; when you do it's a great surprise and he gratefully slurps up every drop), Oda (doesn't try because you said you can't, but when it happens on its own he nearly cheers and is very proud of you).
He consciously makes you squirt but doesn't care to play in it himself.
Fukuchi (makes you squirt to prove that he can and that he's so good at pleasuring women, but he doesn't like the mess, has no interest in consuming it, though he does like to be in the splash zone), Fyodor (will try a few times until he gets you to do it, then he decides he does not like it, it's dirty and weird and you better not do it again).
He doesn't expect you to squirt, and when you do he has mixed feelings.
Mori (literally does not want you to do it and will avoid letting you orgasm if he thinks you're too worked up; he's a doctor, he knows what's going on in there), Akutagawa (had no idea what the fuck was happening; when you explained it was a good thing you over-explained and said some people think squirt is just pee, and that really confused him; he's interested but keeps it very low-key), Mushitaro (despises the mess, will not date someone who is a regular, but obviously can't fault you if it's a one-off), Bram (makes you do it by complete surprise and is not impressed, not intrigued, just wants to move on, never brings it up again), Sigma (doesn't know what it is, is turned off thinking it might be pee, doesn't like the mess, tastes it but says it's not the same as your cum, is pissed that it soiled the bed and now he's gotta have someone come clean it up when he wanted to have you all to himself today).
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kentopedia · 6 months
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it's been decades since you've last seen dazai; your lover & your maker. now that you're finally happy, he's haunting you again with a thousand buried memories.
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overall contents. fem!reader, nsfw minors dni, exes to lover, gothic romance, blood drinking, vampire!reader, vampire!dazai, smut, cheating reader, complicated relationships, blood, gore, jealousy, manipulation, religious symbolism, betrayal, reunions — currently at 21k words
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PART I ♰ MASTERLIST
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As another careful conversation progressed, you poured the tasteless champagne down your throat, the liquid far too much like sandy water.
It was the same, over, and over. The sentence structures were unchanged, never deviating from saying too much without saying anything at all. A practiced smile would follow, where lips perfectly curled upwards. Copied faces plastered onto the next, making it difficult to determine where one individual personality ended and the next began.
These were repeated games, you knew, and you maintained the politeness required of you, even as each curtsy felt stiff and robotic, each refined handshake felt dishonest and meaningless.
Still, you’d grown used to the monotony of this dull life. You tolerated it gladly, ignoring the continuous throb in the back of your mind that grated at you, reminding you that things hadn’t always been this way.
Quietly, you shoved that small voice away. If all of the pomp and circumstance meant you’d feel normal, you’d gladly put on a show and pretend you belonged there.
The woman that stood before you continued her monologue, her dark eyes bright enough to match her elated smile. Her lips were a red, distracting and perfectly lined with the kind of makeup you were certain was far outside her budget. Though her cheeks were powdered and bright, you noticed the beginnings of lines on her young skin, the signs of a life more taxing than she let on.
You’d forgotten her name already. Too many people had introduced themselves to you this evening, and you hadn’t had the patience or interest to remember them. It was unlikely you’d see most of the guests again, after all.
“Congratulations,” the woman said, squeezing your wrist like you’d once played together on the playground. You cringed, wondering if she’d say anything about the iciness of your skin, though it was almost indiscernible with your satin glove as a cover. “I had a feeling you two were going to get engaged soon, but I had no idea when he would pop the question.”
You traded her an indulgent smile, nodding along as you tried not to let all of the conversation float right over your head. Somewhere in the past few decades, you’d lost interest in the faux interactions that events of this grandeur yielded. Everyone was merely putting on their best act, fitting in with those that they deemed superior to them in every way.
In truth, your engagement party was never supposed to reach this scale. Somewhere in between a few close friends, half the city had been invited. It was alarming to see so many unfamiliar faces in a celebration that was supposed to be entirely for you and your new fiancée.
“Thank you,” you said smoothly as Atsushi nudged you gracefully, probably wondering if you’d been ignoring all his friends that evening.
You had… but you felt bad telling him that and would never admit to it. The engagement ball had been his idea, and while you were vehemently against it, you’d indulged him in his innocent excitement. After a life that you’d lived to the fullest, Atsushi seemed to think he had something to prove when it came to loving you.
You just wanted to be with him, plain and simple. There was no need for all the theatrics.
“I’m surprised you invited so many people, Atsushi,” the woman continued, and you’d wished you’d paid attention when she told you her name. She was one of Atsushi’s co-workers, after all. He’d be upset with you if you forgot everyone that he introduced you to. “You’re not usually that type of person.”
Atsushi flushed, and he darted his eyes away bashfully. “It wasn’t my intention for so many guests to be here. Someone got a bit carried away with the invitations.” His thought trailed off, and he diverted to the story of how the elaborate affair had been conceived. Atsushi was the friend of a wealthy agency president’s son, who had offered to organize the event for you. Predictably, he went completely overboard, and now appeared to be having more fun than either you or Atsushi.
Atsushi spun that particular tale with passionate amusement, and you let your eyes wander, hoping to spot a singular face that you were familiar with. If you stood by your fiancée with nothing to say any longer, you weren’t sure you’d make it to the end of the night.
Across the room, a couple of your neighbors huddled in a circle of gossip. You considered speaking to them, if only to entertain yourself, but their husbands were horrendously awful, you didn’t think you could stomach it.
The rest of Atsushi’s co-workers shared hors d'oeuvres and a polite conversation away from the societal elites. On the left side of the floor, the woman who tailored your clothes spoke with another young girl you’d never seen before. A baker from down the street drowned himself in a glass of champagne, looking so dreadfully lonely that you weren’t sure how he’d gotten into the party at all.
You frowned inwards, realizing that while you recognized many of these people, they were more Atsushi’s friends than your own. These were people who greeted him every night on the street, passing their eyes over you like you were just another midnight fling, not the woman he’d been with for nearly two years.
There were too many strangers here to celebrate a marriage they felt nothing about. The superficiality of the situation left a bitter taste in your mouth, and you, very quickly, felt like an outcast at your own party.
You played with the chain around your neck, glancing from person to person. Atsushi, beside you, carried on his conversation, every so often throwing in a word about his work. You were listening half-heartedly, still trying to decide if this was worth all the trouble, or if you should give up on the niceties and head home early.
Someone behind you laughed.
The noise caught your notice because of how achingly familiar it was, how eerie, even. It was cynical and sharp, almost a snort of air that had been released on an accidental exhale. Still, you could hear the genuine amusement in it, a gratitude that came with being able to have something to laugh about.
You shuddered, your body unwillingly reacting as you turned to see who had been loud enough to draw your attention, to stand out amongst a sea of disinteresting people and intolerable voices.
In the corner, the man stood with an aligned spine, every muscle taut to hold himself up. His dark hair was grown out, but every strand remained smooth and healthy, falling over his forehead in loose waves that were glossy in the candlelight. He was caught in a conversation with another, twirling a glass of wine between his fingers, disgustingly captivated by the individual before him.
There was something too recognizable about him for comfort. The shadowed outline of his silhouette was the ghost of a memory, and you were left gawking at a person that you might not even recognize once he turned.
Swallowing, you tried to avert your gaze more subtly as he began to shift his position. He’d noticed you watching him, and he peered over his shoulder, in the fraction of a moment, to catch your eye.
His features were unmistakable.
Your glass slipped from your hands, shattering into a hundred tiny shards on the marble floor. It shushed the room as you maneuvered clumsily to hide away behind Atsushi. From head to foot, you had gone stiff, your body colder than it ever had been, even when you were on the brink of death, before the bliss of sweet blood had ventured down your throat, a memory you’d tucked far away.
You’d long since given up on praying, but you thought about it, just this once, in the hopes he hadn’t recognized you.
Which was a ridiculous concept, really. The memory of him was as fresh in your mind as every bit of yesterday was. He was as likely to forget the image of you as he was his own name, even if you did your makeup differently, if your clothes had changed from how they’d once been.
He’d come here with a purpose—that was the only thing that made sense—and it certainly would have something to do with you. The undeniable acknowledgement sent another wave of nausea through your gut, and you tried to remember what it was like to breathe.  
“Honey?” Atsushi asked, concerned, his voice bringing you back to the present. His hand was on your lower back, wide eyes full of an anxiety you often saw reflected back at you. “Is everything alright?”
“I’m fine,” you said, clutching your hands to your sides to calm yourself. If you didn’t turn around, maybe he’d go away. Maybe he was just an illusion. One way or another, you needed to be free of him. “I just need to get some fresh air. I’ll be alright.”
It was then that you realized that almost everyone’s eyes were on you, and while some stared back at you with pity, some began snickering under their breaths at the darkened stains on the bottom of your gown. You ignored them, trying not to feel the burning observation against your back, trapping you.
If you left, he was certain to follow.
You stepped away from Atsushi, and his hand reached out to you, before retracting, falling. “Are you sure?” He followed your every movement. “You seem—”
“Yes.” You smiled at him placatingly, hoping no one else could hear you. You didn’t want them to be concerned—least of all, Atsushi. It had nothing to do with your engagement, and you were afraid it appeared that way. “I’ll be right back.”
Atsushi seemed to understand after that, shifting his attention to his friends warmly, as he attempted to diffuse the tension. If anything, he knew that you had no desire to cause a scene and relented to your wishes, drawing everyone’s focus off of you. “Alright. I’ll wait here.”
He’d always been steadfast in his understanding. It was one of the reasons that you had fallen for him in the first place.
You nodded and said goodbye to the dark-haired woman before escaping from the ballroom, hoping you could find a room to hide in. Once your feet started moving, they didn’t stop, carrying you throughout the manor in a desperate search for the closest escape route. There were too many doors in the house, a multitude of bedrooms that weren’t needed at all.
As you weaved your way through the halls, you ran into a few couples caught in a salacious embrace, blocking each of the rooms that had once been private. They shouted at you, and you slammed the door uncomfortably, having no desire to intrude on their secretive affairs.
You couldn’t remember what it was like to be sick, to expel every last fluid from your stomach, but you were certain it resembled whatever you were feeling now. Foreboding dread had come to cripple you in every sense of the word, gripping you tightly in the vice of panic.
Finally, you reached an empty bedroom, one with a balcony that overlooked nothing but the gardens. It was a beautiful night, and the dark sky calmed you, bringing you back to the present, pulling you away from memories that you had shoved deep into the pits of your soul, burying them under lock and key.
There was a dreamy hue over the garden, illuminated by the candles and lamps outside. For just a moment, you basked in the serene lighting, the calmness of the evening away from all the guests. The music inside was but a faint whisper, the orchestra stumbling their way back into a tune after you’d escaped the ball less than dramatically.
Inhaling through your nose, you stilled your mind, and waited for the peace to end.
You felt his presence behind you before you heard him, those sharp eyes on you like daggers along your back. He moved silently, gracefully, like he was floating above the floor and not even there at all.
You curled your hands into a fist, staring hard into the horizon as your nails broke the skin of your palm. He’d be the first one to speak, as he always had been, and you’d get sucked into his alluring features, letting yourself indulge as you knew you shouldn’t.
Closing your eyes, you waited for him to break the silence. To come up behind you and hover his touch over your skin. The fragrance of his skin got closer and closer, and you squeezed your eyes tighter, hating how much you’d missed him. That even when you despised him, a part of you still belonged in his possession.
“I’ve missed you, my angel.”
Five words were all it took. Your knees buckled under you, the voice you hadn’t heard in decades like a soothing lullaby from your childhood, a hymn you’d used to worship a god that had left you behind. Your knuckles turned pale as you squeezed the stone of the balcony barrier, just enough force to keep you on your feet.
His voice was never gentle, but for you, he plated his steely knife in rose-colored foil, softening the edges until it couldn’t cut too deep. The sound was exactly as it had always been; nostalgia had its teeth deep in you, before that cool wave of horror crashed over you, remembering who it was, exactly, that you were dealing with.
“Don’t call me that.” You grew stiff as you felt him drawing closer, pulling to you with every word. Within seconds, he was near enough to ghost a breath along your neck, merely a phantom sensation.
“Hm.” His fingers dipped along your shoulders, the blades between them, and you tilted your head away, refusing to gaze into those eyes. “You always did hate that, didn’t you?”
Against your better judgement, a part of you had lit on fire. You longed for him, even when it sickened you.
“Perhaps my lovely devil will suffice instead. You never could accept that you were the very killer I made you out to be.”
“I don’t care what you call me.” You stepped away until you were digging your flesh into the balcony guard, the stone cold as it pressed into your stomach. “I’m not yours anymore.”
“Can you say that while meeting my eyes?" Dazai laughed, and though the sound of it was acerbic and mocking, he stayed where he was. "Maybe I’ll believe you, then. You’ve always been so horrible at lying to me.”
You snarled, ready to slice your nails across his cheek and watch with satisfaction as the blood dripped to his chin.
The anger steeled you, made you think you’d be prepared to face him once more; surely the hatred for him outweighed your lasting weakness.
You turned, eyes narrowed, and though you continued to exhibit your antagonism, the sight of him was poison to your resolve.
Dazai was still as hauntingly beautiful as always, those deep eyes gleaming in the moonlight, watching you with a hint of amusement. His hair was styled as it had been a century ago, transcending lifetimes while he remained eternally twenty-two. He smiled, lips curling into a grim expression, all too delighted with the loose hold he still had over you.
You averted your gaze but stood your ground. “I hate you, Dazai.” You curled your arms around your chest, keeping the distance between you. “I always will.”
For all his confidence, Dazai’s expression momentarily fell, like he’d expected you to welcome him back with loving arms, grovel at his feet with apologies you didn’t mean. Then, the insincere smile was back, drawing you in with revolting sweetness. “I’ve searched for you for decades. I thought you were dead—”
“I don’t care.”
“—Only to find out you’d been running from me this entire time.” Dazai invaded your circle once more, and his fingers pinched your jaw, studying you raptly. There was just a foot of air between you, the cool heat exchanged in your breaths. You ignored every muscle in your body that was relying on memory, wishing to do all the things that it had once done. “Did those years together mean nothing? Were you not to be my everlasting companion?”
You swatted his hand away, a million little fires starting along every point where your skin met. But no matter how beautiful he was, how calm those saccharine words of his made you feel, you knew the mercilessness that he was capable of. “I never made that choice of my own volition. You took it away from me.”
His eyes flashed before he retracted, complacent. “I gave you what you asked for. A life more than the one you had. And then I gave you everything I had left to give.”
“Your apology means nothing to me. Get the hell out of here.” Your words lacked the bite that you’d wished for, not sure you had the courage to push him into a fight. His strength outweighed yours by centuries; you had enough sense not to challenge that.  
Dazai blinked, and then laughed, jeering, without any sense of real humor. “You misunderstand. I’m not apologizing.” He tucked a hand back into his coat, regarding you with serious disdain as he sunk back, the outline of his dark clothes blending with the evening. “I never regretted the decision I made that night.”
You stared at him, blinking, before retracting and matching his heartless laugh with one of your own.
It was as if you’d never been parted at all. The unpleasant decades thinned into one small period, an insignificant point in time that, now, seemed nothing more than a development to your character. “Fine. I’ve got nothing to say to you, Dazai. I wanted to be rid of you, and I was. Your insincere words don’t matter to me anymore.”
His jaw tightened, and you stared each other down, searching for any glimpse of the familiar figure you’d used to love. Undeniably, he was there. Those eyes of his were just the same. The soft words he used for you and only you had never changed.
Yet, just as those sweet parts of him were as comforting as ever, the ugly parts of him were there as well. You remembered his cruelty, his gift of manipulation, and you pushed him away, never again wanting to be strung in that web.
Dazai did nothing but blink as you withdrew, standing straight, pulled taut by a marionette cord. “Is this the life you intend to live now? This half-hearted existence where you befriend mortals that will wither without you, to be engaged to a man you will never spend eternity with? Pitiful, really.”
For just a moment, you’d been so caught up in Dazai that the man who’d loved you with all of his heart had vanished into the atmosphere. It was as if, somehow, you’d forgotten that Atsushi was there at all.
Guilt overwhelmed you.
That man, the sweet, kind man who had become your saving grace, was at risk because of your carelessness. Dazai was too smart not to have taken cautious measures, and you knew he’d learned everything there was to know about your life before intervening.
It made sense why he’d appeared now of all times. It was the perfect opportunity to ruin everything you’d loved for good, reducing you to the whimpering mess that had accepted him in the first place.
He'd made you; he’d known you; he’d loved you for decades. If anyone knew how to break you, it was Dazai Osamu, and that was the thing that scared you the most.  
“I fully intend to turn him,” you said, hating the way your voice broke on a singular syllable, making you seem uncertain of the decision you’d made nearly a year ago. “Though I appreciate your concern. I’ll be perfectly happy this way.”
The comment didn’t faze Dazai, who grinned, his eyes burning with a fire you’d never forget, a sort of glee that only transpired from evil. “I should kill him before that happens, shouldn’t I?” His teeth gleamed in the candlelight, two long fangs slipping over his lips with threatening causality. The points were even more severe in the lighting. “I’ll be sure to savor in the taste as I rip his throat out.”
The image was sickening, a gruesome thought that made your old panic reignite. You schooled your lips into nothing but a line, knowing that Dazai could detect even the smallest change in your features.
“Honestly, I’m surprised you’ve managed to control yourself so well.” He went on, mocking you with every second that passed. “After three years, did I hear? I admit, I was having trouble listening over the band.” He tilted his head, studying you, searching deep into your consciousness for an answer that would satiate him. “You’ve never been able to resist your hunger before. What changed?”
You knew better than to underestimate him and stood taller.
“I’m not the same person I was when I was with you, and I never want to be her again.” You closed your eyes, looking away.
“This isn’t the life I envisioned for you a century ago.”
“My life is not yours to craft. I’m not some doll you can bend to your will.” Finally, you reached out to him, wrapping your hands around his own. His skin was cold, dead, void of any blush from the stolen blood in his veins. You were one word away from begging, pleading with him, even as you stood your ground. “Just don't kill him, Osamu. I’d never forgive you, and that’s what you want, isn’t it? You want me to come back to you.”
The scowl twitched ever-so-slightly as something in his eyes flashed. His name on your lips had always been his greatest weakness, and you could see him thinking hard. “For once, my love, you’re wrong. That’s not what I came here for.”
You stared, puzzled, before dropping his hand and frowning. “Then what are you here for?”
“I was looking for you, yes,” he admitted with a one-shoulder shrug. “I’ve been looking for you for years, and it is by mere coincidence that I found you here.” A cheer sounded inside the house from a toast. You wished that you were in there, warm, where all of this was but a nightmare. “As happy as I am to see that you’re alive and well, I refuse to compete with someone who turns you into everything you are not. If you’re so much happier without me, then who am I to stand in the way?”
“I’m supposed to believe that?” you scoffed.
You’d be a fool to believe that was any more than an obvious lie, that Dazai’s motives were pure of heart. He had never been loud about his jealousy, but he’d killed every lover you’d ever dared to take, leaving you alone with no one but him for comfort.
Dazai had always refused you even one outlet of happiness, even when he’d had other lovers of his own, had brought his one-night affairs to your shared home. The place where you slept in the same bed, fucked on most every surface imaginable had been tarnished with decisions that he’d never be able to undo.
Your gaze hardened. It didn’t matter anymore. With lives that never ended, vampires weren’t known for their monogamy. You were naïve to think that a man like Dazai would give that to you.  
“I mean it, Dazai.” You shoved away the vile memories from the forefront of your mind, wanting them to stay just that – memories. They would not become a repetition of the past. “If you kill him, I’ll burn you to ashes. Then, I’ll step into the flames myself.”
“Ah, but wouldn’t that be such a lovely way to go? Tossed into the flame by the very woman I care for most dearly, reunited only moments later in death.” He seemed too fascinated by the idea, his gaze faraway as if wondering what could possibly push you to that breaking point.
“Hell has a special place for you, Dazai,” you said, disgusted. “Somewhere far, far away from me.”
He laughed darkly. “Oh, how wrong you are. If I am the devil himself, as so many say that I am, then I’ll ensure we spend every moment in the flames together.”
Your lip curled, and you pushed him back in abhorrence, ignoring the tug in your heart that wanted to do everything but. You hated him, you loved him, you never wanted to see him again, you wished he’d stay by your side forever.
Nothing was more dangerous than the allure of fond memories. It seemed even those could lead you to turn a blind eye to the horrors that had been unleashed in the very city you inhabited.
You exhaled. There had to be a line in the sand, a point that you could never pass.
“Please, Dazai. Let me go.” His very presence had already put a kink in your future plans, and if he stayed any longer, you weren’t sure how much damage he’d cause. “Things can never go back to the way they were. I don’t want them to.”
“I don’t either,” he promised, nodding sincerely. “You’ll be rid of me once I make sure that this is what you really want. Who would I be if I watched you lock yourself into a marriage with a man you can never love more than you loved me? To watch you live a life reduced to hiding in the shadows, pretending you were never there at all?”
The arrogant bastard.
“I do love Atsushi more than I ever loved you,” you said with as much conviction as you could muster, your eyes full of flames, unrelenting. That man was waiting for you downstairs, probably worried out of his mind. You refused to play any more games. “Loving you was the biggest mistake I ever made. It was a mistake to let you turn me. I regret all of it.”
Dazai’s lips curled, his gums exposed as he snarled. “Ah, but mistakes are your specialty, aren’t they? You’ve made even more in my absence.”
You said nothing, tired of already falling into the same routine with him. The same old song and dance, taking you back to a time when all you had was him, a time you never wanted to go back to again. The exchange of cruel words was more familiar than your own last name.
“I should be on my way to my room. Sunrise is fast approaching, and I won’t be taking any risks, now that I know what I have to look forward to.” He bowed his head, though you could see his careless smirk, filling you with an irrepressible anger. “I’ll be around.”
With that, you watched him turn and walk out the door, ruining the rest of your evening.
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Dazai’s chin was covered in blood, clots drying together around his lips as he pulled away from the lifeless doll between you, the woman that had once been on her way to becoming a well-known actress. Now, she’d be found in a pile of her own blood, the liquid creating a sticky pool beneath her.
It was a sight you’d never tire of; Dazai the very product of his own misdeeds, looking forever the gruesome killer that he made himself out to be. He was most alluring this way, his fangs protruding over his lips, teeth-stained ruby red from the drink of eternal life.
Your adoration for him was most intense in moments like these, when blood became the one thing that bound you together.
“You are beautiful,” he said, shoving aside the corpse, her deadweight toppling onto the floor. “Everyone pales in comparison to you, my darling.” His fingers were soft around your jaw, bringing you closer, reducing the space between his own lips and yours. “I am eternally yours.”
You woke in the bed that you’d chosen to share with another, the one with a squeaky spring, so unlike the coffins you’d previously spent your days in. The room was completely dark, sun-proofed to save you from your fatal weakness. It could have been the middle of the day, and you wouldn’t have known.  
Atsushi was beside you, a flickering candle creating shadows on his features as he read through his reports. It’d become routine for him to be by your side as you slept, now that you didn’t fear the sun slipping through cracks on the boards.
It wasn’t as much time as you would’ve liked together, being on such different schedules, but you made it work as best you could. Atsushi often went into work with puffy eyes from sleepless nights, or you fumbled around the house, bored while the whole city slept.
“Are you alright?” he asked, eyes full of concern. His hand inched across the bed to hold your own. “You haven’t been yourself since yesterday evening.”
You hated that he’d noticed, even though it was his job to do so. It was wrong to keep secrets from the man you loved, even more when you were to be married in just a few months.
Still, you were reluctant to say anything on the matter, certain that you could deal with Dazai on your own. You’d mentioned him to Atsushi only once, and it was through vague details that gave the impression you were in too much pain to talk about it. Like the sweet man he was, Atsushi had accepted it, and he had never once forced the words from your mouth.
You owed him nothing, but it felt wrong to keep your history with Dazai a secret from him. Especially now. Especially when Dazai, who was a loose cannon on his own, had never been very rational when you were around.
“I’m fine.” You sat up in the bed, maneuvering closer to the side where Atsushi was, his legs spread out in front of him. He was wearing casual clothes and seemed scrubbed clean from a bath. It must have been later than you thought. “Just a weird dream is all.”
“I didn’t know vampires had dreams.” Atsushi went back to his reports.
That was because you’d never told him. You rarely had dreams, and when you did, they were more like memories. Or some prophetic, horrible vision that you’d learn to ignore. Nothing pleasant, like when you were human.
“What time is it?”
“About eight. Sun should be down by now, I haven’t checked. I’ve been working—there seems to be an increased amount of crime this week. I don’t know who came into town, but they’ve got an itch for trouble.”
“It’s not a vampire, is it?” you asked, instantly feeling nauseous. Dazai had no qualms about making a spectacle of killing humans. He’d leave a string of bodies like a signature, knowing you’d recognize his mark.
Atsushi snorted. “No, I think I’d see the signs. Just some regular guy.”
You weren’t convinced. Dazai knew how to hide his tracks and make it seem like anything but a vampire, but you convinced yourself to keep quiet. If Atsushi had even a suspicion about Dazai, he’d go after him, and you didn’t want to see what would happen if he did.
For both your sake and Atsushi’s, you hoped that he was right about this.  
“Okay.” You threw the covers off the bed, putting yourself together with the clothes you’d strewn across the room. Atsushi’s eyes remained on the paper, ever the savior of the city he lived in. It was admirable, really, even if his work took some fraction of your time with him away. “I’m going to go out, Atsushi. I’m starving.”
“Want me to come?” he asked, finally looking up, much too eager. He was always so willing to stand by as you clamped your jaws into rodents, feeding off the unwanted pests that lingered the streets.
It was disgusting. You knew that your diet to him, and to all the other humans, was noble. It was repentance for all the horrid sins you’d committed at your lowest point.
To vampires, it meant you were rejecting your nature, trading your gift for a chance to thinly grasp at the cord of humanity you’d never truly held at all. It was abhorrent and shameful.
“No,” you said, certain that if anyone saw you feed on a rat that evening, you wouldn’t be able to recover. How Atsushi could stand to be with you after that display of events was beyond your comprehension. “I need to clear my head.”
“Okay.” Sometimes, you wondered if he’d ever doubted you at all. He was always understanding of each rejection, each carefully chosen word, no matter how harsh they were. “Will you be back quickly?”
“Of course.” With that you smiled, never wanting to waste the precious hours you had with your fiancée before the sun rose. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” Atsushi kissed you before blowing out the candle and laying his head down. “I’m going to take a nap. I’ve been working on this all afternoon.”
“See you later.” You watched as he tucked himself into the bed you’d just left, waving at you lazily from the covers.
You swallowed down the sharp pang in your chest, looking away from him as you left the room, into another that was bathed in moonlight.
Really, you were content with your, but the arrangement between you and Atsushi was growing dismal. While you made it work, you always had, you couldn’t help but feel guilty that you’d never be able to accompany him on daylight ventures, confined to your midnight prison.
You lost your head as you traveled through the dark streets, the city busy with nightlife now that the sun was far beyond the horizon. As usual, there were all kind of people out and about, the rich and poor, the young and old, the good and the bad. And you, the worst of all, the one pretending to fit right in with the rest of them.
After a young couple, not much older than Atsushi, crossed the road, you slunk down into an abandoned alley, bending yourselves into the shadows like the nightly creature you were. You heard the rats scurrying about before you could even spot them, your supernatural hearing so much more attuned to subtle sounds.
With a face, you walked to the hub of rats, your speed much quicker than any of their tiny legs. One particular animal looked back at you, intrigued against its very nature, holding a piece of garbage between its small human-like hands.
You took the rat by the neck, staring into its beady eyes as you plucked it from the ground like a dandelion. The creature looked back at you so helplessly that you almost felt guilty for freeing it from its meaningless existence. Without thinking, you bit into its flesh, draining the rodent dry. The fur was rough against your tongue, disgusting as always as the strands got caught in your teeth.
It wasn’t enough. What little blood you had gained from the animal was never enough to sustain the bloodlust that had increased tenfold since Dazai stepped back into your life.
With a sideways glimpse down the alley, you plucked another rat from the gutter, remembering why you were destroying your own dignity in such a way.
“You’ve made some concerning decisions lately, but this certainly takes the cake.”
With the rat still thrashing around your lips, you glanced up at the man lingering down the alley, his tone cruel and mocking. You continued to suck the last bit of blood from the rodent before tossing the body aside, meeting Dazai’s eyes.
“Why do you care?” you asked, and though you were still starved and lightheaded, you would draw your hunt to a conclusion. You would only embarrass yourself further with Dazai’s keen stare watching your every move.
“I’d wondered why you seemed so weak.” He tossed a disgusted look towards the rats scurrying through the trash, their plump bodies dragging thick tails behind them. “I see, now.”
“Spare me the lecture. I swore I’d never feed from another human, and I’ve never broken my vow.” A rat ran past you, unafraid, even after you’d just killed another member of its clan. The long tail hit your ankle, and you cringed, to Dazai’s satisfaction.
“You’ll get yourself killed. For a vampire of your age, you should be much stronger than this.” He took a step towards you, cornering you in the alley. “Now, you’re a threat to no one.”
“Then, I will die. Something I’m surprised you haven’t done already.”
Dazai was silent, his eyes hard. For all of his promises of the threats that lie out there, you couldn’t spot another but him. There were dangerous vampires in the world, you knew that better than anyone, but he’d always be the one you feared the most.
“Will you continue to torment me for another night?” you sighed wearily, wiping the blood from your chin with a handkerchief. “Your very presence exhausts me.”
Dazai, irritatingly, lit a fire deep in your gut, increasing your hunger to lengths you hadn’t felt in years. You could smell his blood from where you stood, the ambrosia that you’d never tire of. It was a dessert so unlike anything you’d tasted as a human, and you hated that he was tempting you with it now.
Your vision flashed with images of you sinking your fangs into his shoulder, draining him of every last drop as you lost yourself into the man that was Dazai Osamu.
Dazai eyed you carefully, dragging his gaze down to your chest, across your body, back to the blood-stained mouth that remembered too fondly what it was like to taste him. “You still wear the ring I gave you, hovering delicately over your heart.”
You’d forgotten; or you just thought he’d never notice. You’d hidden it under layers of clothing, but still, it had broken free. “A reminder of my past mistakes. It has nothing to do with sentimental value.”
He hummed, considering twirling it around his index finger before he thought better of it. “If that’s the case, why haven’t you turned another companion? Is it not for the hope that we might return to another one day?”
You hadn’t noticed when he’d gotten so close, close enough to touch you. It became hard to focus, even as he kept a respectable distance, letting you retain a semblance of control.
“Atsushi clings to his human life as I did. I will never turn him against his will.” You stood taller, even as you refused to look into his brown irises, to see the mockery that was pushed back at you. “When the moment is right, only then will I do so. That’s something you’d never understand.”
He laughed. “You’ll continue with this narrative, will you?”
You said nothing, staring at the bodies of dead rats that would soon begin to decay. Let him find amusement in the choices you’ve made.
“Sweetheart,” Dazai said, his voice softening with the tone you’d never been able to resist. Your heart twisted, your forehead wrinkling as you kept your eyes firmly on the ground. “Don’t hurt yourself in this way. These vermin will not sustain you.”
“I won’t hunt with you, Dazai. I won’t kill anyone. Don’t try to deceive me into coming back to you.”
“That’s not what I was suggesting.” Before you could discern his actions, Dazai had bit into his wrist, opening a vein as blood poured down his forearm.
You froze.
Fangs had dropped over your bottom lip without a thought, your pupils dilating with the desire of blood. The scent was hard to resist, a sweetness that had been placed on this Earth only for you, handed over from the Devil in an attempt to bring you furthest from God. Though, that might have been all wrong... maybe your god was standing right before you.
Your eyes glued to the fountain of life, and you began to doubt your restraint. It’d been so long.
“Dazai—” you tried to step away, but your feet were cemented, buried under the cobblestones of the dimly lit street. You were a stronger woman than this, and certainly a vampire of your age would not collapse at the sight of blood in the way you were. “Stop it.”
“I’m trying to help you.”
“I don’t want your help. This isn’t what I want at all.”
You finally tore your gaze away, taking a few more steps back into the alley as you regained control of yourself, sick with a yearning for him. Dazai was playing a torturous game, and you refused to be the victim.
The vein closed, and Dazai watched you curiously, but he made no move to reopen the wound. Your irrational thoughts began to calm, and though you could still smell the blood that circled through his body, warm from a recent kill, your resolve was now stronger.
“I can’t stand to see you like this.” His words were hard, disappointed. “I won’t leave until I know you’re safe from harm. Even a mortal could end you with the weakened state you’re in.”
“Safe from harm?” you asked, crossing your arms over your chest protectively. “I’m in no danger here. I’ve been fine without you for fifty years, and I will continue to be fine without you for the rest of eternity.”
His voice deepened, eyes narrowing into a glare as he watched you retreat. “Don’t pretend to be a fool. Your very position with me put you at risk. You betrayed vampires even older than me, and they won’t stop until you’re dead.”
You exhaled, looking up at the stars before dropping your attention back to Dazai. “I don’t think you actually care. You told me that you loved me, and time and time again, you failed me. You left me there, Dazai. I had no choice but to betray them; they were going to kill me.”
“I thought they already had.” He reached out to you, curling his hands around your chin, desperate and wanting and so many things that you had never seen him. “Don’t you understand? I thought you were already dead. I never would have left if I’d known the truth. I’d never think of escaping without you.”
Your breath caught, and while you couldn’t stand to believe him, you felt yourself giving in a little more, succumbing to Dazai each time you crossed his path. Still, you removed his hands from your face, forcing yourself to be a little stronger, to put up those steely walls until he left your life once and for all. “I don’t trust you, Osamu, and you don’t trust anyone but yourself. There’s no reason for us to be speaking at all.”
His jaw tightened, but he let you go, straightening with a frustration he didn’t deserve.
“I’m going home to my fiancée—the man who has never put conditions on his affection. Please, stay as far away from me as you can.”
You shoved past him, shaking with nerves. Though he was stronger, he stumbled back, watching you go with an emotion you couldn’t discern.
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PART II
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tag list: @cerberels @thateldribitch @hauntedsol @hannzai @cha0thicpisces @kissesmellow21 @sukiischaotic @hinata7346
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godshitgirl · 6 months
Text
In the mood for some angst? Here's some bsd men x terminally ill reader🩷
Dazai:
• Atsushi notices that everyday, Dazai leaves work early to go...somewhere. it's not like the guy is the type to follow a schedule so he can't tell where exactly he's been going lately. When he asks he just plays it off as a joke, tho he does notice how his gaze seems to be so distant lately.
• turns out, everyday these past few weeks Dazai has been visiting you in the hospital. He always comes with a sweet little gift, nothing extravagant, maybe a flower he knows you like or a cup of coffee from a place you used to frequent.
• he would spend hours with you, just the two of you in that sterilized little hospital room, talking about anything and everything. His demeanor is nonchalant, yet more soft and sensitive to you. He's always had a soft spot for you after all.
• when he learned of your condition he didn't try to "cure" it or "fix" it. He decided that he will love you and stay with you and make you feel like nothing has changed as much as he can. He keeps up with the jokes, the gifts, and tries to make you feel as normal as you used to feel.
• you notice how he stares at you more often, how he looks deeper into your eyes when you talk. As if he's trying to memorize every feature before it all goes away.
• he's decided that once you're gone, is when he will go too. He doesn't want to live without you. He laughs to himself a little bit, a soft, gentle chuckle, at the thought. "It's not the way I would have wanted, but now I finally get to die with you."
• he thinks he's so good at keeping this plan from you. That he's hiding it completely out of your line of sight. But you know Dazai. You know him better than anyone. You know how much he loves you. And the day you part ways your last wish to him is that he continues to live, to move on, to be with his friends and do what he wants to do. And once you're gone, he never thinks of suicide again.
Chuuya:
• at first, he does everything he can to find a cure. He spends thousands on doctors and doctors all specializing in your condition. But they all say the same thing. It can't be cured.
• you notice how much this is eating him up, how he's been more cranky, more irritable, he's never resting. He barely even gives time to visit you at the hospital as he's always on the search for a new doctor who will finally tell him what he wants. That there's a way out of this, a way for you to continue being in his life. But to no avail.
• your request is final, it's the last thing you ask him for. You want him to rest, to give up, and to just enjoy the time you have left. At first he's speechless. His eyes are smaller and wider than you've ever seen them. It feels as though his heart had stopped beating, his blood stopped pumping, and the world just went quiet for a second.
• then there comes the anger. The frustration. How can you just ask him that? To let you go? To just stand by as this stupid illness takes you away? Don't you know how much you mean to him? Don't you care?
• Chuuya doesn't visit you for a while after that. He spends time alone. Not even drinking the wine he loves so much, the bottles he had been saving for a special occasion, the ones with you in it. He stares blankly at nothing, thinking of nothing. The world could end right there and then but he would still be in this state. At least we'd go together, he thinks.
• meanwhile, you remain at the hospital, in the same bed, in the same room. A part of you is happy, because now Chuuya can move on. He can forget about you and finally be happy, happier than he'll ever be with you. You smile at the thought. You used to think that this time would be full of tears. But you were never one to cry. Neither was Chuuya.
• it's sunset. The end of the last month your doctor said you had left. Your body has weakened, you can't even get out of bed. At this point they've stopped trying, stopped filling you with meds and serums and shots. Stopped plugging you into machines and machines and machines. There are no more pipes around your body. No more wires. No more tubes. They've decided to let you go peacefully, and make you feel as if you were sleeping in your own bed, in your own home.
• on the last day, Chuuya is there.
• he stands at the doorway, calm and collected. He enters the room without a word. All he does is sit next to you, and take your hand in his. You look at him and smile.
• "I'm here, doll." He says.
• he wants to apologize. To atone for leaving you alone for so long. For forcing you in this room by yourself. But he knows you hate apologies. He just wants to spend the last remaining moments he has with you, with you.
• as he's sitting on that little chair next to you, watching your breathing get slower and slower, softer and softer, your life force fading away, he examines your face. Your eyes, your nose, your lips. He examines how your hair is fixed into the way you always did it, as if nothing has changed.
• he wants to say something, the last thing you will ever hear.
"I won't forget you,",
"I'll never leave you,"
Something like that. But he doesn't.
Instead he sits and watches you, in complete silence. He only realizes now that you two have been so loud and noisy the whole time you've known each other. Simple conversations are said in such loud voices, but you both loved it that way. But this time, you both decided it would be quiet. Peaceful. A contrast to the unusually loud and vulgar lives you both have lived. An end to a chapter.
Fyodor:
• Like Chuuya, Fyodor isn't one to give up so easily. He goes beyond doctors, or medicine, or anything so ordinary.
• he goes for the Book.
• the one thing that can change anything. All of this. He can give you a better life, one without all the dirt and bloodshed he had associated you with. One where you're happy, living in the house of your dreams, with all the things you've ever wanted, happier than ever.
• a life without him.
• Fyodor loved you too much to watch you get tainted by his own filth. He always thought it was too late for him, but not for you. But now you don't have all that time. Now he has to erase everything. Erase every part of you that was dirtied by him. With a new life free of him, you would finally, truly, be happy.
• He's off on dangerous missions. Making all sorts of enemies. All to do the last thing he could to make you happy.
• "Fedya," you called, your voice as sweet and soft as it always was. He snaps out of his trance, not realizing his gaze was so far away. "Yes, dear?" He answers, hard, sharp eyes softening upon seeing you. "Come here," you ask.
• he stands up from the chair he was sitting on across the room from you, and walks to your bedside. He puts a hand on your pillow, careful not to touch you. He knows very well that your unique condition is not one that is contagious. Even if it was that wouldn't be the reason he isn't touching you. It's all symbolic, he doesn't want to dirty you any more than he already has. He wants to keep this valuable, albeit cracked little porcelain doll in this state, before it slowly disappears.
• "Hold my hand, Fedya." You tell him. Breaking from his symbolic gestures, he takes your hand in his, caressing you with his thumb as he does so.
• "I want you to do something for me," you ask, not meeting his gaze. "Of course, dear." He answers almost immediately. He knows you never ask him for anything unless it was really important.
• "I want you to stop looking for that book." You say. Fyodor's eyes widen a little, a frown almost forming on his face. But he's smart enough to not need a reason. And he knows you well enough to know you don't want a sappy little conversation between the two of you filled with tears and cries.
• It takes a moment, but he smiles and nods. "Okay," he says. "Anything for you, myshka."
• your final moments are spent with him telling you a story, reading from a book you used to love. It was in Russian, and he would read it to you as a pastime before going to bed together. Even after you're gone, he keeps reading. All the way until he finishes the book. He closes it and looks at you. Your eyes are closed, your mouth is slightly open, as if you were just asleep. He gets up and kisses you on the forehead, and doesn't leave until the doctors come in.
Ok that's all! And sorry but usually when I say "bsd men" I mean these three idiots who I love with my whole heart and my whole pussy🤗 also sorry if some were kinda out of character, especially fyodor, I haven't seen him much in the anime yet since I haven't gotten to s5😅
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yuyanwrites · 6 months
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Helloo so about your requests...
idk if you'd be comfortable with writing that but how about bsd men (Dazai and Chuuya at least, add more if you want) with an s/o that has an eating disorder? Not in a romantic way, hell no. If you're not okay with that, just ginkre this, it's fine. <3
BSD men with an s/o that has an eating disorders
Dazai
He used to ask you so many times to do a double suicide with him
But then he saw you crying and he realised how serious it was
He would never want anyone to spiral into melancholiness
Dazai doesn't understand your eating disorders fully nor will be say that he knows the specifics of your pain
But he does know how it feels to be alone, when you think you can't deal with "it" anymore
After all he oftens stands on the balcony with a glass of whiskey in hand as fresh bandages wrapped around his body
I think he'd get you to join him
It's an incredibly delicate moment where both of you are completely vulnerable
No games, no lies, no mask
He's a touchy guy very affectionate
And slowly with his affection, advice (cause omg is that man smart), and support he'll slowly try to get you to be comfortable with eating
With your own body
And you know he'd do anything to make you see what he sees
Because he sees a beautiful person inside and out who was able to love him the good and the bad
And he'd be damned if he couldn't do the same for you <3
Chuuya
Chuuya is an alcoholic who drinks his problems away
It helps that he's a lightweight so it doesn't take much for him to forget about... everything
But he knows that's not good
And he'd never let you go down that route, no way, not on his watch
He'd try to convince you to seek professional help he'd pay all your sessions anything you need
If youd rather not he'll try to convince you here and there but not push it
Instead he moniters you and makes sure you eat little by little from a snack to a meal to 3 square meals a day and he'd celebrate every milestone
And let's be honest you'll probably never have the chance to try and vomit the food up on his watch
That man has a six sense I swear
Ranpo
I'm sorry but ranpo will not understand
I don't think he'll ever fully understand
"But why don't you eat?! Food is good!" Type of guy
But he knows it's hurting you, not eating
And it becomes all the more real when he walks in on you hunched over the toilet seat as the contents of the ada's group linch falls out your mouth
The bitter acid of it makes you shiver
He starts to get you to eat under the guise of making you try his new favourite snack (that happens to change every week)
A little bit more than what you'd eat to get you through the day but not enough that you could throw it up so easily
Sweets=sugar=energy for you to survive -Ranpo
And on the nights when you can't take it anymore
He lets you climb into his lap and cry which is unusual considering you were the one to always baby him
But it didn't matter, not in that moment
Fyodor
You tried to get him to eat iron tablets once to help him as he's anemic
Now he's trying to do the same with you but with food
I think he'd bring up the hypocrisy of it
So blunt omg 😭
If he offers you a logical solution and you don't take it (because it's obviously not easy) he'll just stare at you contemplating why you did not take his offer
Low-key thinks you're doubting his intelligence
But alas he takes another approach and slowly gets you to eat
He definitely reads a lot of books so he'd have some knowledge on this
Not a very touchy person like dazai or ranpo but he gives you headpats and forehead kisses after every meal that you don't throw up
He likes to make you tea because it's nutritious but not a solid food
And if all fails he'll low-key manipulate you so um yeah...
Nikolai
So silly very silly guy
Immediately goes to Fyodor for help
He makes your food into cute little animals and stuff like you're a kid just to make you feel better
Does little shows while you eat you forget you're eating
And boom the plate is empty how'd that happen?
In the beginning he'd sneak a few spoons of like porridge or something of the sorts into your mouth every hour
He's a very touchy guy as well so he's always cuddling you and telling you how much he loves you
It's honestly very sweet and it's not often you see a sincere Nikolai telling you how much he loves you while the two of you are laying on the couch, movie long forgotten
He'll gasp if you say you skipped a meal and then hop into the kitchen to make something (I'm sorry he's just dramatic like that no guilt tripping at all)
A/n: I'm sorry this took so long 😭 I'm taking a long time with all of my requests because I have so many projects both writing and not going on but I hope you enjoyed and have a wonderful day!
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