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hopefulnightlady · 2 months

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NSFW 141 Headcannons

(gender neutral lol)

part 2(Soap): here

part 3 (Gaz): here

part 4 (Ghost): here

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This post... has been a long time coming. First i intended to post all of the 141 but its loooong. No one would read that. So, here's Price, tell me who you want next in the notes or my anons or whatever. this is pretty clinical for nsfw headcannons, im ace so thats to be expected. Anyways have fun reading im open to discussion (I am of course right on everything). and questions!!

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As you can see, Price is first. mildly naughty stuff under the cut <3

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Bad at separating the violence he experiences and doles out in his job with any possible consensual violence in the bedroom

Meaning: he's not very sadistic, or enjoys rough play

That doesn't mean he's not dominant, though. He just doesn't enforce it physically much

Maybe with a little manhandling, esp if his partner is smaller

I feel like he'd adore getting pegged if you A got him to trust you enough and B managed to make him consider it

He'd get off on the perceived humiliation of being ‘taken’ at least a little bit, and possibly crave being taken apart like that by someone he trusts

Still more dominant leaning (not calling him a dom or anything, it's all very mild)

Filthy mouth, probably rumbles unimaginiable shit into your ears as he fucks you from behind

Certified unhinged taste in music in the bedroom (We're talking Ayesha Erotica sorta unhinged. He's definitly played cbat before to fuck with his partner [metaphorically and literally])

Has embarrassingly (to him lol) sensitive nipples

Like them being touched makes him do reactions you usually only see in porn, except it's real and not badly acted

Infertile due to some sort of genetic fucky wucky! no babies :( but also: no babies :D

Aftercare:

Would clean you up for aftercare, and he wouldn't speak I don't think, but.

His eyes, his smile, he would be so soft as he cleaned you and it would say Everything.

Would snuggle too, after having a smoke, outside, because he's polite that way. After he’s come back from the smoke is when he'd probably ask whether you're all right.

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bye !!

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#daddy warcrimes #john price #head cannon #headcannons #cod mw2 #cod headcanons #captain price #im doing this because none of you insane people know how to characterise them properly #shame on you #SHAME #/lh #cod x reader #price x reader #price #idk how tumblr works #forgive me #price x you

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talesfrommedinastation · 6 months

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Tactical vest time…and now it’s Daddy Warcrimes Crosshair!

I’ve never drawn a rifle like this, but I figured if anyone was going to be armed, it would be Mr PewPew here.

I also did what I should have done with Tech and given him some Belter tattoos. Including one that matches the ones Dr Tanke Drummer gets for family members (he gets adopted by her and her spouses at the end of Far Past the Ring) .

@eyecandyeoz @merkitty49 @moosethren @thecoffeelorian @techs-stitches @vimse @sued134 @eelfuneral @marymunchkiin @nika6q @eclec-tech @littlefeatherr @freesia-writes @commander-sunshine @blitzink @megmca @apocalyp-tech-a @wrenkenstein @autistic-artistech @skellymom @ilikemymendarkandfictional @sunkissedclones @amorfista @amalthiaph

#tbb #cloneforce99 #thebadbatch #the expanse #belter #theexpanse #fan art #daddy warcrimes #star wars art #modern gear #tactical #clone force 99 #starwars the clone wars #the bad batch #crosshair tbb #crosshair fanart #crosshair the bad batch #crosshair

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uranium-absinthe · 7 days

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Me, looking for reference pics so I can do my makeup like Toecutter's.

#mad max 1979 #if daddy warcrimes can make dysphoria disappear..then feral biker husband can too #mad max #toecutter #toecutter mad max

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sadpanda · 1 year

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#mcgruff the WARcrime dog #dndads #dungeons and daddies #I threw this together in like half a second lmao

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judasisgayriot · 1 year

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omw to babygirlify that middle-aged man

#heroesedit #primatech #heroes nbc #heroes #anni edits #nbc heroes #nathan petrelli #idk just need to be like there he is my warcrimes babygirl daddy <3 <3 <3 #am i an angel or a monster #heroes multiseason #heroes season 3

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pondering-the-blorbs · 5 months

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lol der zeit nachruf zu kissinger ist so nichtssagend? kriegsverbrecher ist angepisst dass wir ihn nach seinen kriegsverbrechen gefragt haben. mehr um 11

#it's kind of giving 'sorry daddy warcrimes we didnt mean to upset you uwu'#apparently unpopular opinion but i dont think you have to give any respect to one of the worst imperialists of the last century #rip to the zeit but i'm different #kissinger should have been tried for his crimes ❤️

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reashot · 9 months

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To celebrate my mother day's Fic for reaching 100 likes and reblog. I can finally show y'all what the Arc kids are supposed to look like and who they are for the sequel:

https://www.tumblr.com/reashot/717409273449234432/happy-mothers-day-feat-jaunes-future-children?source=share

Dusk Belladonna

Gender:♀️

Age: 10.

Semblance: Invisibility (she can made her self invisible for few seconds.)

Weapon: N/A. (She doesn't have or want one.)

Favorite foods: Anything with fish but prefers Tuna.

Likes: Mommy, Daddy, Being alone.

Dislikes: Dogs, crowds, stranger.

Character Desc:

Dusk Belladonna is the daughter Blake and Jaune which means she is also the daughter of both human and Faunus. In her timeline Human and Faunus achieved true equality and mutual respect with one another. It was not easy and although Dusk herself does not know the sacrifice needed to achieve it, even she knows that it's something to be cherished and protected. Quiet, reserved and preferring the company of close associates. She is still expected to one day lead Menagerie and all of Faunuskind. A decision that she is also unaware of. But her parents are against it. Instead wanting her to enjoy her childhood for as long as she can before the fated day.

Scarlett Rose-Arc.

Gender: ♀️

Age: 17.

Semblance: Petal Storm. (An upgraded form of Ruby's Semblance.)

Weapon: Crescent Rose MK. 20. (A.K.A. the Geneva Violator.)

Favorite foods: Strawberry Shortcake.

Likes: Spending time with family, weapons, fighting.

Dislikes: Bully, Bugs, Rainy day.

Character Desc:

Scarlett like Ruby is both a powerful fighter and a genius weapon inventor. Her weapon is the Crescent Rose MK. 20. A Scythe, Voulge, grenade launcher, assault riffle and sniper rifle combination weapon. In practice such a weapon should not be able to work but she and Ruby managed to made it work. This essentially turns her into a one woman army. But even though she’s a formidable warrior she still not yet able to beat her older brother Vermillion in a fight. Something which annoys her.

Victor Arc (formerly a Schnee)

Gender: ♂️

Age: 20.

Semblance: Glyph. (Has been shown able to summon a small army worth of Grimm.)

Weapon: Myrtenaster,

Favorite Foods: Sushi.

Likes: Seeing her mother dead, his little sister, cute things. (In that order.)

Dislikes: His mother, Atlas, Incompetent people. (himself)

Character Desc:

Victor Schnee or now known as Victor Arc was once a former Scion of the Schnee Household. Is the son of Jaune Arc and although he hates to admit it, he is also the son of Weiss Schnee. In his timeline the world is broken in every sense of the word. In his world. War has engulfed Remnant. And the scale of destruction is beyond comprehension. Continents shattered, sea boiled over, even the very air turned against you, All courtesy of the Superweapon created by the SDC. Of course many tried to stop the war from happening and all failed, Even Jaune Schnee died trying to stop it. His dead however is proven to be the catalyst for the tragedy. After his death something broke inside of Weiss. Despaired and Enraged by her husband’s death. Weiss reorganized the Kingdom of Atlas into the Atlesian Empire and declared war on everyone. With Victor serving as her right hand man. Working under her Victor is responsible for many of the Empire’s victory and her atrocity. He himself is directly responsible for numerous warcrimes and even genocide against the Faunus. Victor is also credited for killing Ruby Rose and for capturing Blake. Back home in Atlas he was hailed as hero for this feats. It’s only until much later that he regretted his action. And came to hate his own mother so far as to wanting her dead. While she's the one that broke the world, he still blame himself for helping her doing it.

Aurum Arc

Gender: ♂️

Age: 30-40.

Semblance: Ignite. (He is able to heat up the surface of any object he touch. If you seen the hot knife video on YouTube it’s pretty much like that.)

Weapon: Prominence Flame. (A Greatsword of the big-ass variety.)

Favorite foods: Homecooked meal. (he ain’t picky.)

Likes: Justice, protecting innocents, helping people.

Dislikes: Injustice, Villain, Laziness.

Character Desc:

As the oldest of the 12 sibling, Aurum is also born the weakest among his siblings. Born prematurely many did not expect him to survive childhood. But he refused to give up. Motivated by stories of warriors of old and the story of his father. He continues pushing his limit. And to the surprise of everyone he not only survive past childhood but he actually starts growing taller and stronger compared to other children his age. So strong in fact that in the age of 15 he managed to kill a Dragon Grimm. By the age of 17 he joined the Arc Knights. And in the age 20 rose through the rank and become the youngest captain of the group. A rank that he still hold to this day. Despite his achievement however he still found himself lacking behind his father and he made a promise that he will surpass the Grandmaster, Jaune Arc himself.

Vermillion Rose-Arc.

???

Scarlett's older brother will finally make his true debut in the next fic. So till then just wait my lovely readers. You will be mildly surprised.

And if there's anything you want to ask just leave a message, I'll try to answer it as best as I can.

And do tell me which one is your favorite?

#arc kids #lancaster #dragonslayer #knightshade #whiteknight #rwby #rwby au #rwby fanfiction #rwby lancaster #rwby dragonslayer #rwby knightshade #rwby whiteknight #jaune arc future children #Jaune Arc #rwby oc

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melrosing · 19 days

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I think Tywin is what happens when a aristocratic upper-class white Englishman makes his family the Nazi party. I mean my guy out here has such a stiff upper lip he had no bottom lip it’s just a line and all because his dad was jolly like Santa. If he was here his least favourite holiday would be Christmas and his favourite bonfire night where he tells all the children about guy Fawkes death.

I think the thing about Tywin is he's less interested in appealing to the populace than your average dictator tends to be, who generally seem more desperate to be liked. Tywin has pretty nasty politics and plenty of warcrimes under his belt, but i don't think he cares to be liked, he's too insular for that. the reason I think horrible upper class English dad is more to do with his immediate family dynamics e.g.

the emotional constipation where crying is weak and love is weak and the deep deep seated shame, but shame for all the wrong things. like lbr so much of what drives Tywin is shame. shame of his father of his children and deep down of himself!!! english.

very much a 'children should be seen and not heard' kind of guy, he wants children as avatars of his power but sees no point in engaging w them as people. sidenote I think England despises children and near always has and that's been passed from the upper class downwards. but another time

yes Tywin has daddy issues but have you considered the mummy issues. the obsession he has with his father's mistress is in part because she's encroaching on their late mother's position. so what exactly does it mean when Tywin marches her naked through the streets. and how does Joanna fit into all this?? ask yourself. anyway I think mummy issues are baked into upper class men like im pretty sure there are Books about this

also the weird psychosexual relationship with his children generally.... deeply English

I don't think Tywin believes in a superior race beyond his own family, though it's unclear what exactly he thinks House Lannister has to be proud of lmao WHAT have they even achieved in the recorded histories besides sitting on a goldmine. nah he just has a deep conviction that he is in precisely the place he ought to be and is obsessed with his own heraldry and won't even marry outside the family he marries his own cousin who looks just like him.... English

a penchant for doing horrific things in a tidy little way. and then going see now wasn't that efficient?

also sidenote on guy fawkes, tywin would be so gratified by how horrifically that guy failed lol. idk if it was just my catholic education but generally i grew up seeing guy fawkes as a hero who never was LMAO I guess Tywin would take the polar opposite pov

#ask #tywin lannister

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amalthiaph · 7 months

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Somehow, Mayday returned.

This is a request by @talesfrommedinastation for their neighbor, the great Redneck Doug based off of this post. Please do check it out for the context. I've been enjoying the Doug Talks Star Wars series and I am more than honored to bring this one to life.

I actually did some research for this one. I rewatched both 'The Outpost (or The Daddy Warcrimes Christmas Special)' and 'Pabu (or HR Goes to Daytona)' for this artwork and uhh... I CAN SEE WHERE DOUG IS COMING FROM WITH MAYDAY x PHEE. Okay for all the Tech girlies out there, I do ship Tech and Phee, but I just can see why Doug thought these two would look cute together. Mayday would sass Phee, Phee would sass Mayday. They're like poetry. They rhyme.

Me degenerate (respectfully) friend: Why do you accept requests? Me, another degenerate: Because it pushes me out of my comfort zone.

ISTG I used to not draw armors, but the Barbie Mugshot Challenge made me draw three Mandalorians. I also don't draw instruments but for dear Daddy Warcrimes (who's slowly growing on me) I would do both.

Mayday x Phee is the rarepair that I'm so on board, along with that crack headcannon that Qui Gon was actually Anakin's dad but Shmi panicked and said it was the Force.

And uhh

Tech lives. For the love of all things bright and beautiful, he better be or I'm kidnapping Filoni.

#the bad batch #star wars #artists on tumblr #small artist #tbb #sw tbb #star wars the bad batch #tbb phee #phee genoa #tbb mayday #commander mayday #tbb crosshair #redneck doug #amalthiaph

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bobcatmoran · 1 year

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So, with the 20th anniversary of the US's incredibly ill-advised and generally terrible invasion of Iraq, I've been reminded of where I was at the time that happened. Namely, I was in college, and I was taking a course called "Human Geography of Global Issues." The professor was a Texan, and was known for a) the fact that he loudly and proudly wore cowboy boots everywhere, sometimes capped off with a ten gallon hat — not your typical fashion at my Minnesotan college — and b) his repeated insistence, delivered in his drawling accent, that "Bush Junior is not a real Texan — the whole family are just a bunch of carpetbaggers from New England." (he was also just an absolute gem of a man — I have a very vivid memory of coming into the Geography Department offices the next year, distraught because a computer glitch meant that none of my class registrations for the next semester had taken and the GIS course I wanted to take for my minor was full — and he calmed me down, reassured me that there were ways around this for not only the GIS class but all the classes I was now locked out of, helped me navigate the system, and I got an email within the week saying that despite the GIS class having no room in the online course registration, I was now registered for it)

He was also an expert on the Middle East. And, as it became clearer and clearer as the semester went on that the then-Current Administration (which he had negative respect for) was hellbent on going into Iraq for reasons which seemed to largely amount to "Gonna finish what Daddy Bush started," he made predictions. Predictions about how easy it would be to topple Saddam Hussein and how hard it would be to fill the power vacuum. Predictions about the looming sectarian time bomb between the Shia and Sunni Muslims in Iraq. Predictions about how the Kurds would react. Predictions about how the US would get bogged down and wouldn't be able or willing to leave for years and years and would, in the meantime, commit warcrimes that would just lead to the rise of new terrorist groups.

Every single one of those predictions came true.

(He also predicted in detail during one class, with terrifying accuracy and illustrations, exactly what would happen if a major hurricane hit New Orleans, which it did two years later with Katrina).

Meanwhile, on campus, a "Peace Camp" sprung up in front of the campus center, with students living in tents until…uh…ok, the goals were kind of fuzzy, but it was a fixture for the rest of the school year. At one point, the Young Republicans (all three of them :P) decided to set up a "Freedom Camp" on the other side of campus, which wound up consisting of like, two guys with signs for a single day, and which led to a sprouting of mocking signs for "Weed Camp" and "Space Camp."

Also, a group of anti-war protestors took up a station kitty-corner from campus and they were there every day until I graduated, waving signs, with cars honking as they passed.

#us politics #us history #weird to be saying that for something that happened within my lifetime #but i think a very significant portion of my followers are too young to remember this era

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hopefulnightlady · 1 year

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using wiki how to learn how to light a cigar so i can write about captain price. this is what being a dedicated author is like

#cod mw2 #captain price #price mw2 #daddy warcrimes

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talesfrommedinastation · 6 months

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My Redneck Neighbor Doug Writes Star Wars Smut/Fluff

Like a true, red-blooded American, I outsourced a task because I'm a lazy piece of shit overworked. I'm trying to write my own Mayday/Phee piece, but in the meantime....LSU absolutely curb stomping Florida last weekend had Doug practically skipping all over the block.

Doug was more than happy to write a piece for you PheeDay fans out there. He's eager to have y'all join his extremely rare of rarepair clubs.

Here y'all go, the Mayday/Phee piece, written ENTIRELY BY TEXT MESSAGE BY A CHUBBY OLD CAJUN ENGINEER NAMED DOUG.

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"Shit? What’s smut? Does it involve butts? It can? Awesome.

By the way, don’t tell my wife I’m writing this.

Church Lady’s on Coruscant. Sassy Park Ranger’s on break there too, because fuck that BLOND JACKASS and all the Jedi are MIA. They meet in a bar because Church Lady’s gotta watch the Saints game and Sassy Park Ranger found out they have 50 cent wings and he don’t get paid all that well watching the snow with his best friend, Daddy Warcrimes.

(“The Saints? You know the NFL doesn’t exist in Star Wars land, Doug.”

“IT’S MY STORY, I WRITE WHAT I WANNA WRITE!”)

She’s all “GOT A NAME, BROWN EYES” and he’s all “THE NAME’S SASSY PARK RANGER BUT YOU CAN CALL ME COMMANDER”. They split a basket of wings, because Church Lady’s got the confidence of a woman who knows where the shallow graves are located, and Sassy Park Ranger likes a woman who can suck a bone or two in front of him while keeping eye contact.

Yeah. If your woman can handle extra hot sauce on the first date you better get a ring ordered ASAP.

Anywho, he’s so turned on by her eating these wings that he asks her to lick the sauce off his beard. She says treasure hunter’s don’t do that. He says the greatest treasure is found in the most unlikely of places.

So she begins to mouth-ram him and lick all the buffalo sauce off of that face fur. He runs his hands through her hair to see if there’s any weapons in there, because Sassy Park Ranger learned a thing or two in the field and Church Lady’s got dat WHO DAT energy.

You don’t mess with a Creole woman I tell you what and Sassy Park Ranger ain't no fool.

(SAINTS NATION RISE)

Satisfied that they've freaked out all the aliens and shit at the bar, they end up at Church Lady’s hotel room. They get naked and do it and it’s so hot.

Um, yeah. It’s hot. Yeah. It’s so consensual, because I gotta include that. I don’t wanna get in trouble on the internet. And it's weird writing this out.

Don't tell my wife I'm writing this!

After they do it, Church Lady’s all ‘Let’s watch Space HBO’ and Sassy Park Ranger’s like ‘Yeah’, and they watch that show where white people yell at each other about money*.

They order room service and do it again, this time, in front of the poor droid bastard dropping off their food, because Sassy Park Ranger don’t give a crap and Church Lady likes an audience. Trust me.

They exchange phone numbers, and text when they can and when they see each other they have wings and then wild-assed booty banging somewhere I don’t know where.

THE END!

("Where does that leave Ryan-from-Accounting? Don't you think Church Lady and him belong together?"

"Ryan-from-Accounting don't deserve that independent, smart woman."

"Oh?"

"He's got his bitch wife Laura and her KIA and his goofy brothers on the HMS Search Warrant. Let Church Lady have a hot bearded tanned park ranger who can lead and mouth off for the fun of it.")

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There you have it folks. I could have asked for more, but I like knowing I can look Doug in the eye when I borrow his snow blower, and like in 'Game of Thrones', Winter is Coming.

I'll try to write my own, I promise!

Tagging some of Doug's greatest fans in here: @amalthiaph @megmca @skellymom @sued134 @merkitty49 @insertmeaningfulusername @thecoffeelorian @eyecandyeoz

Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in the future!

*= I think he meant 'Succession'?

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vhagarswar · 7 months

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Ranking all Targ males from least scary to most scary for the spooky season! (TV ONLY) and explaining why.🎃🎃

This list was made on who made the biggest impression on me, not ‘’who would win in a fight’’ for we all know it would be mr ‘’i dont want it’’ plot armor. I included both GOT and HOTD here and some men apparently had bastards off-screen but unless i saw one i'm not keeping track of the lot sorry.

I don’t read books so….

16. Daeron.

I don’t know, he is not even in the show. What is he doing on this list? Oh yeah, he might be in season 2. Well, sir, I hope you bring some serious drama to the screen. Right now I'm not impressed. At all. Because you don’t exist. At all.

Threat level: -100 (he does not exist at this point imo) method of defeat: Pull his hair? (idk)

15: Viserys I Targaryen.

Viserys is a good kind man, but a horrible father to most of his children. He had a dragon once, but that dragon died. He had two wives and showed himself a righteous, good and kind rare Targaryen who should have given his Green children more love and attention and raised them better as well (I said what I said) That said, Viserys is no real threat to anyone or anything, as he proved countless times that he lets people walk all over him (Corlys, Alicent, Rhaenyra) and that there are no real consequences when it comes to him.

Threat: -20 method of defeat: Hide his crown or put a whoopy cushion on his throne (Heart-attack)

14. Viserys (Little viserys)

Not really impressed by Viserys so far, or even scared. I think it will depend how the show will continue if we will ever see how Viserys (Daenyra’s son) will grow up. I don’t count it as first appearance points, so he can rise in ranking should he grow up to be as terrifying as his uncle and daddy.

Threat:0 (child) method of defeat: bedtime.

13. Jaehaerys II Targ (The son of Aegon/Aemond and Helaena)

Nothing that impressive going on either, nothing to be afraid of at this moment as well, aside from the fear that I could accidentally step on his toes or something. We must wait and see if we will see if Jaeh grows up to be as terrifying as his uncle or daddy depending on what you believe.

Threat:0 (Child) method of defeat: Give him cheese (lactose intolerance)

12. Aegon (Child of Rhae and Daemon)

Again we will see how the show handles his aging, his possible warcrimes and how insane he will become if he ever becomes insane. Ranked above Jaeh because I believe that Rhaes and Daemons children would be more chaotic because Daemon would raise his kids, Aegon ignores them.

Threat:0 (Child) method of defeat: peek-a-boo.

11. Maelor (Child of aegon/aemond and Hel.)

Once more we need to show how the show handles him. I haven’t seen him burn puppies on screen or rip his sister’s dolls to shreds so we will wait and see if and how Maelor will live up to his namesake.

Threat: 0 (child) method of defeat: tear his favourite toy to pieces/Tell him his mother loves his brother more.

10. Joffrey (Child of Rhae and Harwin)

Joffery is a child so we havent seen his heights and lows yet, but he does slightly scare me more than most kids. Why? Because he's the youngest. Youngest children are always a bit more spoiled, get away with a lot more (i am a youngest child). But thats all speculation we dont know how this brave strong boy will become scary if at all.

Threatlevel: 0 (child) method of defeat: Challenge his bravery and manipulate him into doing something dangerous.

9. Jaehaerys I targaryen.

This is the old king that opens the show, so to speak. We see him sitting at the council. He apparently was a very good king, reigning over nearly sixty years of peace and prosperty. Now that’s rare in the Targaryen family. We applaud him, but we don’t fear the old man. At least I don’t. Not once. He's higher than Viserys because he is older, older people get forgetful he might become as Vhagar and accidentally commit war crimes but we didnt see any of that sadly.

Threat: 3 (but dead) method of defeat: Take him for a stroll/let him explain the targaryen family tree to you (heartfailures)

8. Unnamed bastard of Aegon II

This child is the most terrifying on the list because he grew up fighting and not the kind that the royals do with pretty swords and tourneys he has to learn how to fight for himself or he could die. I was pretty disgusted (by aegon ofc) when I saw this innocent little boy sitting there, without his parents or a guardian in an environment that horrible. A horrible environment makes for horrible people. I hope we will see more of this bastard in season 2. Threat: 2 (child with fighting skills) method of defeat: Tell him his father will come back after he gets milk.

7. Lucerys ‘’Velyaron’’/Targaryen.

Lucerys proved himself right from the start to be a sweet, kind boy. He could not face injustice and was very small and kinda not that important compared to his brother Jace (imo) until he took Aemonds eye and possibly arguably, and most certainly, played a big part in the start of the civil war that drives that wonderful story. Lucerys was shy, perhaps, a bit too sweet, yes but he was a skilled dragonrider, as was shown in his final moments. (this is not sarcasm, i think most dragons wouldnt have survived vhagar that long) Lucerys proves that even in death he could be a plague to Aemond that he will never be free of, being both ionic and yet sweet to his loved ones.

Threat: level 4. (but sadly, turned into a dragon meal/dead) method of defeat: Remind him that death comes for everyone/Offer him a dragon-omelette.

6. Jacaerys ‘’Velyaron’’/Targaryen.

Jace. He showed right up when his mother needed an heir, he is loved by many, good, sweet, so boring-I MEAN EH-. Jace is …decent with a sword, he would beat me but so would the children on this list. Jace is a good, kind person that almost equals Jon snow in got. There is not much going on for his darkness or emotions, I think the closest thing he got to being scary was when Aegon hit on Baela, i loved his little speech. BUT: I do hope we see another darker side of Jace, as he now is not really annoying me, but I have this feeling he can be more. There can be more struggle for him as in morally. His brother has just died, so I assume we will get it. I hope to see more scenes of Jace in general, more info on him as well.

Threat: Level 5 Method of defeat: Say you need a ‘’Strong’’ boy to roll a tv into a classroom/ Hit on Baela.

5. Jon Snow.

Right from the start of the show we see that Jon is a loyal but lost puppy who would never ollow his own dreams and would rather follow someone else’s. We see him as a skilled warrior and that might be terrifying to his enemies, but as a viewer I could see he is a golden retriever, loyal, sweet, kind. The only moment I feared Jon was when he was brought back to life but he was himself so…nothing to fear i guess? Yet we fear him for his plot armor. Threat: 7 (Plot armor king) method of defeat: Remind him that Arya killed the night king, or offer him a throne.

4. Aegon II (Son of Viserys I, Alicent Hightower)

Aegon is a raper, a usurper and he can be terrifying for those two reasons alone. HOWEVER; There is something hiding beneath those little hobo locks and his bright eyes. Aegon is dangerous in another way. He is medicore with a sword, not caring for duty, nor his destiny. But what he does care for is inflicting drama, and he is pretty damn good at it. He is chaotic and sadistic, and does clearly not care who or what he destroys as long as he has his fun. That makes him dangerous. Aegon is luckily too much of an idiot to form a real threat but he does terrify me.

(Threat: 8 Level of defeat: Chastity belt/Rehab.)

3. Viserys III Targaryen (Son of IDK and IDC)

‘’WHAT?!’’ This man has what we call ‘’First Targ privilege.’’ He is the first male Targaryen I saw on screen. And he absolutely terrified me. I didn’t think he was sexy for it or hot, or anything. I wanted him off my screen asap. But there is more than his privilege. The other Targaryen males in this list struggle perhaps for position, for glory and worth but Viserys III has already lost it all. He is foolish, gullible and imo the inbreeding has gone on longer so therefore he has a higher risk of insanity. Aemond and Daemon are scary for who they are and for who the world made them to be, but Viserys is terrifying for he has lost everything, and is willingly to risk it all to get back what he wants. That makes him scary to me. But mostly also the first part. Threat: 8 (insanity) level of defeat: telling him he is no dragon and gifting him a pot of gold.

2. Daemon Targaryen (The Rogue Prince)

Daemon is a complicated man. He is put second, many times. He is forced to marry a woman he does not love. But there is more to Daemon than his crimes/tragedy. He is a chaotic man with quite the strategic mind, the resources, the name, the titles and the courage to back up his chaotic plans and plots. He is also quite attractive which he is very aware of. He rides the biggest dragon in the world. I think there were multiple moments Daemon was terrifying. For example his introduction. i didn’t notice at first, but he was sitting the throne. I didnt knew at the time but that is considered high-treason. he was committing sorta treason right when he was introduced. I dont mind though he looked hot sitting that iron ugly thing. Next scene we see him kill his wife, behead a man and eventually we see him even choke our beloved disney princess Rhae-rhae and for that he can burn. But Daemon does prove himself to care about others. He can be capable of emotions, of good will and good deeds….For the right price.

Threat: ten. Method of defeat: Telling him he can’t do something, mock him or win from him.

Aemond Targaryen

Aemond has many flaws and skills that make him as terrifying as Daemon perhaps even more. Daemon is very readable. You can read him and his actions/plots what he does next very well, as he is logical semi-healthy man. Now Aemond? Aemond does not wear his heart on his sleeve and is often hiding that away/

It kinda comes close to what the actor of Aemond said in a interview: ‘’Just because Aemond is smiling does not mean he is happy.’’ He is basically hiding his emotions very well, and even if he is happy he is ready to go for it any moment (his sudden outburst by the baratheons) there is also the matter of his lost eye and how he became a sword man nevertheless. There is something terrifying about Aemond and it's his dedication. To everything: To his duties, to his family, to destroying his enemies and learning. He does not want to be better than the Strong boys, he wants to be the best. He believes himself superior, better, and stronger than Aegon but his sense of loyalty binds him to Aegon. I hope we see more of his war crimes tbf and more of his dark side. We saw a very mild version of his book counterpart (huh but didnt you say you didnt read-) Oh i did read Aemonds parts and It scared me xD. So Aemond is terrifying not because he is stronger than Daemon, but because he is chaotic as Daemon, second born as daemon, never enough as Daemon and Aemond has a score to settle with the rest of the world or whoever he thinks hurt him.

THREAT: Ten (SAME AS DAEMON!) method of defeat: Give him a hot woman, a castle and an army and you won't see him even if you would invade his home, hold his mother hostage and commit crimes in the city he grew up in.

CONCLUSION

When I made this list I already knew: It was going to be between Aemond or Daemon, there was no other way for it. I knew I was going to put Jon last and I knew it was going to be controversial af. Yet i hope you enjoyed it. I did my best to make it kinda funny lol.

#house of the dragon #aemond targaryen #daemon targaryen #Jon snow #Game of thrones #Viserys I Targaryen #Viserys II targaryen #Viserys III targaryen #Aegon II targaryen #Aegon iii targaryen #Hotd shitpost

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partywithponies · 1 year

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Negatus truly is one of the characters of all time. It's like everything about him was created in a lab to appeal to the tumblr crowd as much as possible. He's pale and dark haired. He wears leather and eyeliner. He's an evil villain who kills people and commits warcrimes but he's a very pathetic villain who fails a lot and gets bullied by other evil villains. He canonically mentions wishing he had friends. He's an over-sexualised slut. He tries to kill the main character while ALSO somehow canonically having a crush on the main character. He has a tragic backstory, daddy issues, and a horrendously abusive childhood. He cries onscreen. He has a soft spot for young children and small animals. He's killed so many people. He struggles to spell his own name. He's 6'2 and then wears huge boots on top of that. We never stood a chance.

#Yonderland #Negatus #simon farnaby

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skellymom · 8 months

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"Redneck Doug's Bad Batch Family BBQ"

Cool divider by the talented @cafekitsune

Background: Bad Batch Family BBQ is crashed by Tech's crazy ex-wife. This one shot includes Maadienne "Mad Momma" my OC character from Vagabonds. This story takes place in the BB future when everyone is safe, settled down, and enemies can be friends (except for Hunter and Crosshair-they're family frenemies).

Word count: 2K

Warning: swearing, the "C" word, alcohol, sexual references, drunkenness, Crosshair being inappropriate with Hunter's wife (she no stand for it), Wrecker/Crosshair pyromania, Tech losing his temper/ vomiting, nasty/horrible ex-wife, messy family shenanigans.

This One Shot is based on Tumblr user @talesfrommedinastation post about their Redneck neighbor Doug who has a very fun take on the Batch. To read it (which will make everything in this story more understandable):

https://www.tumblr.com/talesfrommedinastation/727350948139302912/my-redneck-neighbor-dougs-interpretations-on?source=share

Mad heard the Batcher Brothers before they even turned into the driveway...well, at least Wrecker. Tech had driven his extremely quiet fully loaded Tesla. But Wrecker screamed down the dirt road in his “custom” painted LOLAMOBILE (Omega and “The Littles” did the custom work) with Down blasting at an ear shattering volume. He was kicking up dust like a desert storm. Crosshair was in the front seat and Echo holding on for dear life to the roll bars in the back.

Mad met the brothers at the door to her and Hunter’s home. She and Hunter had been preparing a huge meal all morning for their family gathering. Hunter barbequed a huge side of pork to perfection and Mad heated up the kitchen with her famous delicious side dishes. She wore her comfy black cotton body hugging T-shirt dress and kitchen apron with the words “I poisoned your food” emblazoned on it. Her long undercut was braided with the end barely tickling the top of her butt. She was still fit after birthing 5 children with Hunter, just with a bit more curves and tattoos. Hunter lovingly referred to her as his “Big Tiddie Goth Momma.”

The Brothers took turns entering their humble abode and greeting the hostess.

Echo stepped in first, pecked Mad on the cheek, and gave her a bouquet of wildflowers and then handed over a box of Cinnabun toaster treats “This is for Omega. Tell my loveable smartass sister Toaster Strudel thought of her!” They both broke out in laughter.

“I’ll give this to her when she comes back from the Tipoca City Mall on the Ocean. She took The Littles so Hunter and I could cook without them getting in our way.”

Next was Wrecker, “Hey Julio, my big beefcake. How ya doin’? As he picked her up and hugged the total stuffing out of her with his huge arms.

“OHHH Mad, thank you so much for feeding us! I NEVER leave your place hungry!!! Looking forward to those amazing biscuits you make.” He let go and handed her a huge tub of Mantell Mix. “For dessert!”

“Thanks, Wrecker.”

Then Crosshair, who removed the toothpick from his mouth to lean down and smootch Mad on the cheek...while grabbing a handful of her generous derriere, “Daddy Warcrimes has been looking forward to those ‘biscuits’, too.”

Mad immediately slapped Cross upside the head with the kitchen towel that was slung over her shoulder “Hands off or I’ll Daddy Whip Your Ass!”

“Whatever you say, Vixen” he winked and removed his hand.

Hunter was used to his sibling pining after his wife since returning from Mount Tantiss. Crosshair could get any woman he wanted, and usually did. But he carried on like he really wanted Mad... or thought he did. She was more than Crosshair could handle, and Hunter liked it that way. Hunter and Mad were over the moon sweet on each other, even after being married all this time.

“You look like Daddy Womp-Womp to me. Touch my wife again and I’ll snap your skinny ass in half like those Slim Jim’s you live on.”

“Got your weekly shower I see Hunter. She must have felt randy today and wanted you sweet smelling.”

“OH, KNOCK IT OFF YOU TWO!!!

Mad turned to see poor Tech standing silently in the doorway looking anxious and forlorn. He handed Mad his 6 pack of fancy IPA’s (he always brought his own booze and refused to drink anything else Hunter or Mad stocked) and a bottle of Mad’s favorite. “Oh honey, thank you!” She put her arm around Tech and led him into the house. Then put the alcohol on the counter. “I’m SO proud of you finally serving divorce papers to Laura. I know it was hard, but she’s not treated you well at all.”

“Hunter, get everyone a drink, will ya?” She ran to the stove to stir the homemade Mac and Cheese.

“I’m on it hon.” Catching a glimpse of her beautiful bottom jiggling as she sprinted across the kitchen. He shot a look at Crosshair with an antagonizing expression of “Mine, NOT yours”. Crosshair sneered back.

Wrecker patted Tech on the back as the brothers sat down at the kitchen table with their drinks, “So ya FINALLY did it! You’re free!!!” Tech flinched and looked guilty.

“About time!” Added Echo

“Hated that crazy bitch Laura” Crosshair squinted while inserting a fresh toothpick into his mouth.

“Oof, she made everyone else around her miserable, too” Hunter put his hand up to his head, like the mere thought of Laura was giving him a migraine.

“OH GAWD...remember when she nearly ruined Rex and Ashoka’s wedding?” Mad gestured to Tech with potholders before checking on the biscuits, “Had to get nasty jealous when all you did was say ‘Hi’ to Phee Genoa during the reception.”

“Ashoka using the Force to shut her ass up. That was GOLD!” Echo threw his head back and laughed.

“Well, no matter. Better fish in the sea. You know Phee asks about you all the time when I’m at my Ladies Group...so I invited them over tonight.” Mad winked at Tech and bent over to pull out the biscuits.

Crosshair craned his neck hoping to see Mad’s shirt dress ride up her thigh.

Hunter punched his brother in the arm.

“Oww, FUCK Hunter!”

“HAAA, caught ya lookin!” Wrecker gleefully pushed Cross back into Hunter, who gleefully punched his brother in the arm again and sent him back towards Wrecker. Cross managed to stay in his chair but lost his toothpick.

“The whole Group is coming...The Martez Sisters...” Mad wasn’t even paying attention to the shit going on at the table.

“YEAH! My honeys!!!” Wrecker grabbed Cross and shook him in excitement.

“You’re spilling my beer, Wrecker!” Crosshair pushed Wrecker away.

“...Fennec Shand...” Cross stopped. Mad had gotten his attention. They liked to talk guns, plus Cross thought she was a hot little honey.

“…mmm...and Riyo Chuchi.” Echo grinned, tipped back the chair, and crossed his arms behind his head.

Tech didn’t look excited at all. He was unnaturally quiet and halfway through his second IPA already. Not a fast drinker and it seemed like he was sucking them down tonight.

“Ok, sides are done. You boys go out and start up the bonfire, it’ll be dark soon and the ladies should be arriving.”

Wrecker got up and hurried toward the door, excited to set something on fire. Crosshair followed him. “I’ll make sure they don’t set fire to the backyard...again.” Echo promised as the screen door slammed shut.

Hunter got up from the table and looked at Tech. He had peeled the label off the now empty second bottle of IPA. “What’s up? You’re not usually like this.”

Tech barely looked at his brother, attempted to say something, “...nothing!” He ignored the rest of his fancy beers, grabbed the full bottle of Jack Daniels, and sprinted out the back door.

Mad and Hunter looked at each other. Tech was acting strange and extremely out of character. He almost looked scared.

Hunter walked over and embraced Mad, “Man, Laura did a number on him. Glad I don’t have that problem.”

“Yeah, not into yelling at my hubby. But I WILL punish you accordingly if you’re bad” Mad sassed.

“Oh, I’ve been SO bad” Hunter growled and nipped at Mad’s neck while squeezing her bum.

Mad growled back and was about to give Hunter a huge passionate kiss when a small, controlled explosion rocked the house...followed by Wrecker wooping loudly.

“For KRIFF SAKE! NOT AGAIN!!!” Hunter let go of Mad and ran outside. Mad decided to wait on bringing the food out and survey the damage.

Apparently, Wrecker had found Omega’s four-wheeler gasoline can, emptied it onto the fire pit, and Crosshair climbing the old Oak tree across the yard decided to show off. He shot into the pit from 40 feet up and several yards over to start the fire. Echo was mortified and immediately apologized when Hunter ran out of the house.

“It’s ok brother. At least they contained the fire and didn’t burn down my shed...again.”

The timing was perfect, as The Ladies Group screeched up to the house in a modified topless Humvee.

Fennec, Riyo, Phee, and the Martez Sisters descended on the backyard inferno whooping and hollering in excitement. They brought booze, music, and a large sheet cake.

Phee made a beeline for Tech, who was now sitting on a plastic lawn chair dangerously near the fire and getting clearly inebriated on the Jack. The alcohol and heat made him sweat, and he uncharacteristically shed his whole shirt (a very expensive one) ...which was now burning in the bonfire. So now he was shirtless AND drunk.

“Hey Brown Eyes” Phee regarded Tech with interest. She had never seen him like this. He looked slightly scared but working on being drunkenly feral.

Phee opened her mouth to speak again to get Tech’s attention, but was cut off...

“I HAVE A CONFUSION TO MAKE!” Tech slurred loudly. He had everyone’s full attention.

“Huh? What did he say???” Wrecker looked around for clarity.

Echo translated, “I think he has a confession to make.”

Tech pointed at Echo then comically pointed at his nose.

“I LLIED ABOUT SERVICING DIVORSH PAPERTHS TO LAURA LAST WEEK. DIDN’T HAVE THE BALLTHS. OH MAKER...” Tech tipped Jack Daniels back and chugged another third of it down.

“Shit, I didn’t expect dinner AND a show!” Crosshair leaned back in a large sprawling settee with a shit eating grin.

“Shut up Cross! What do you mean Tech? Hunter inquired. “So, you didn’t serve the papers at all, and she doesn’t know you want a divorce? How did she let you come here by yourself if you’re both still together??”

“OH...MY TIMING...” Tech looked up at Phee with total drunken embarrassment.

“Come on honey, you can say it” Mad tried to coax Tech to get to the point.

“You got this Brown Eyes” Phee smiled at Tech with reassurance.

Tech tipped back the Jack and downed several gulps. He was applying liquid courage. He was sweating like a mad man.

“I FFINALLY DIDIT THIS WEEK...”

“When???” Wrecker threw up his hands. He couldn’t stand the suspense!

“ABOUTH AND HOUR AGOO.”

And that is when everyone at the party heard the angry roar of a Hyundai Kia approaching at top speed towards the house.

“Oh, this is getting good” Crosshair cracked a cold one and waited for all Hell to break loose. Fennec slid in next to him on the settee, stole his bottle, took a swig and handed it back. Her eyes locked on the epic clusterfuck that was to unfold. Laura’s bitchiness was legendary in the Batcher Circle.

“I’M STHO FUCKED!” Tech screamed

The Kia skidded to a dramatic stop next to the Humvee, the driver’s door thrown open, Laura emerged with hateful toxic fury, screaming at the top of her lungs as she advanced upon the party. A skinny, overly processed blond, overly make upped, overly augmented, hateful harpy of a woman. “RYAN! (her despicable pet name for Tech). RYAN, YOU FUCKING USELESS TIT OF A MAN! YOU CAN’T PULL THIS SHIT ON ME! WHERE ARE YOU?”

Echo grabbed Riyo and led her away from Laura’s path. The Martez Sister’s weren’t so lucky as Laura slapped the sheet cake from their hands and it hit the ground. Wrecker was offended at the total waste of cake and the treatment of His Honey’s. “Eyyy, what the fuck, Laura!”

Brave Hunter stepped in front of Laura and put his hand up in protest “Now Laura...”

She slapped his hand away, “GET FUCK OUT OF MY WAY YOU SKEEZY REDNECK BASTARD!”

“OH NO, YOU DON’T DO MY MAN LIKE THAT!” Mad ran up on Laura, but Hunter was faster. He picked up Mad and threw her over his shoulder walking away “Nope, we aren’t doing this tonight.”

Then Laura noticed Phee Genoa standing there next to Tech and she totally lost her shit, “OH, SO YOU’RE LEAVING ME FOR HER? HAVE YOU BEEN FUCKING HER SINCE THAT REXSHOKA WEDDING???” Tech sat there mortified to be accused of infidelity. He kept silently nodding no over and over while Laura screeched at him.

“JUST AS WELL, I’M LEAVING YOU FOR ADMIRAL RAMPART. HE’S BETTER THAN YOU, FUCKING RYAN-FROM-ACCOUNTING!!!”

Tech took another few swigs from the bottle, stood up, swayed a bit, then with the fury of a man who had been kicked too many times, slammed the Jack into the bonfire. There was a sound of glass breaking and the fire roared up as the rest of the alcohol ignited. The fire reflected in his glasses, totally hiding his eyes. He was wet with sweat and his hair was an unruly mess. His chest, since it was bare, and close to the fire was red hot. Tech advanced on Laura with rage from years of abuse and seeing her treat his family and friends so horribly.

“YESTH I FUCKING SERVICED YOUTHE PAPERSS, YOU FUCKIN HORRIBL CUNT! COULDNOT STAND ANOVER DAY WIF YOU! RUMPFART CAN HAF YU!!! The last sentence was right in Laura’s face, and she got the brunt of Tech’s drunken breath. She reeled back, but Tech advanced on her. He obviously wasn’t done, either. He pointed his index finger at Laura, poking her sharply in the chest, “I DIVORTH YOU!” Poke. “I DIVORTH YOU! Poke. “I DIVORTH YOU! Poke. She kept backing up with each poke. “BEGONE YU VILE BEASTH! FUCK OFTH TO TH DEPFTHS OF HELL YU COME FRUM!!!

Tech stood there looking Laura right in the eye. She had never seen him stand up to her like this.

“BY THEWAY...” he swayed unsteadily “...MY NAME ISSNOT RYAN. ITS TEEEECBLAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!” Tech projectile vomited violently upon Laura.

There was a collective gasp from the group. Then everyone started laughing.

Tech still wasn’t done. He vomited a second time on Laura’s expensive heels for good measure.

“This is fucking GOLD!” Crosshair smiled, threw his arm around Fennec and pulled her close. This barbeque was going down in Batcher history as LEGENDARY!

Laura, thoroughly disgusted, screamed, cried, and made her way to her Kia. She got in and tore away from the scene narrowly sideswiping a red Jeep Cherokee that was coming down the road.

The Jeep Cherokee carefully pulled into the driveway and parked. Omega and The Littles emerged and walked down to the bonfire.

“Some crazy driver almost wrecked us!”

Hunter replied, “Yeah, that was Laura.”

“Glad we missed her”

“She’s a BITCH!” The littlest little chirped

Hunter sternly corrected his youngest “Language, young man!”

(NOTE: I heavily considered Phee just pounding Laura into the pavement. But then, I thought Tech needed to take a stand for himself...even if he needed the help of Jack Daniels).

PLEASE like, comment, and/or REBLOG!

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