#crayon does still attempt on his own to get them somewhere to live. he has bad luck with finding work though
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neeeed to start drawing little comics for my object oc world.. crayon and cor are on my mind always :)
#ive never really talked about what their life is like before that one comic i posted for objectober#mainly cause i wanna be able to approach it correctly#crayon and cor are homeless for the majority of their story. and i want to be able to like. be respectful about how i approach that#i guess.#its mainly that cor was always homeless. since she was 'born' in an alleyway with no knowledge of the world and acted like a wild animal#at least early on#crayon stumbles into her alleyway when hes delerious and starving and cor instinctively helps him#since starvation is what cor's squirrel half died from. she recognizes it and immediately wants to prevent someone else from suffering#like that#they also end up staying in that alleyway. since cor cant really enter any homeless shelters or anything#on account of her not having any real place in the world. and crayon chooses to stay with her since she matters more to him than anything#crayon does still attempt on his own to get them somewhere to live. he has bad luck with finding work though#which is why he ends up as a street performer cause its at least something hes good at that at least reliably gets him enough money to eat#its also through that that glow stick notices him and invites him to his circus. and how that whole arc of crayons life starts#id talk more about cor's side of all of this but im in the process of rethinking it since i wasn't too happy with what i had before so#oc ideas
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guess who’s back at it again in @martuzzio‘s space outlaw au! this is a bit of a shift from my last two, so please heed the warnings below! if you want to know details about any, or think any others should be added, then drop me a message. it’s also over 7k, buckle in.
usual psa, may not be completely canon to the au. i pick & choose depending on what’ll be most fun, and its up to marzo what (if anything) she wants to keep! enjoy it as it is!! (aka wels has longer hair in this because i have a crayon licence that says ‘i do what i want’.)
featuring: mumbo has a meeting on his home planet that goes wrong in an impressive way, wels has a sword, an evil tech guy villain, hurt/comfort, me being annoyed i have to use grunts instead of minions because i only see yellow things & good ol’ last minute rescues
warnings: violence, electrocution, mind control esq device (not used on anyone), injury, attempted kidnapping, brief imprisonment, pseudo-science lmao
"So I'm on babysitting duty." Wels is an intimidating sight in his suit, sword glinting in his hand. Mumbo finishes slicking back his hair, trying to get the parting perfect before he replies.
"You're not that much older than me." Compared to some of the hermits, at least. Nobody can come close to Xisuma, anyway. Wels laughs, checking his sword over.
"I feel it." He tilts his head towards Mumbo with half a smile. "I'm pretty much ancient next to you." Mumbo scoffs, flicking through his design folder again. Thankfully, this is more of an exchange than a pitch. Mumbo's improved, certainly, but he'd argue his reputation does most of the work for him. It's the main, if not only, reason he's back here.
"You're going to look it if you bring an actual sword to a tech meeting." Wels shifts his hold, the sword pointed towards Mumbo in an instant, narrowly avoiding the glass screens he's holding.
"Think you can stop me?" He teases, one eyebrow raised. There's the hint of a smirk on his face. Mumbo breathes out, relieved he's not offended him by accident.
"Didn't say you couldn't, did I?" Wels's shoulders rise with a smile, his sword coming to rest at his side.
"Smart decision." Wels picks up his weapon holster. A brief meeting or not, they all know better than to leave the ship without protection. Iskall refused to let Mumbo go until he checked each of his weapons, cleaning them thoroughly. His suit has been examined too, even if he's leaving the helmet on their ship. He knows the air is breathable here and it'll probably help if he's recognised. Wels has his helmet under his arm, waiting to put it on. "You ready to go?" He asks, holding his hand out. Mumbo nods, patting his folder and weapons.
"Got everything I need," he replies. Wels gives him a last smile before putting his helmet on, checking its secure then nodding.
"Let's go get you to that meeting, then." Mumbo glances around the shuttle, making sure everything's shut down. It locks with a satisfying beep. "You know where we're going?"
"Think I remember my way around." Wels nods, gesturing for Mumbo to go ahead with a bow. It's only slightly sarcastic. Mumbo makes sure to roll his eyes as he takes the lead.
He'll admit, it's nice being back on his home planet. Stepping out of the hangar bay to concrete roads and pavements. White buildings reach into the sky, entwined with greenery and tunnelling the layered streets. It's not often he gets to come back here. Plus, he might get to prove himself and his designs. If this works out, it's a massive step for him.
With all its familiarity, it's still strange being somewhere so busy. Cars and buses float down the roads, and they pass by people as they walk. Families with kids, couples, mostly people in the business wear Mumbo recognises. The pair get a few second glances as they make their way through the city. Wearing the suits is a bit of a statement. In truth, Mumbo didn’t want the stress of changing for the meeting. He would've spent forever worrying about what to put on and how he wants to present himself. Whereas Wels would probably live in his suit if given the chance. They're more common in a city like this than in other places, but hardly a frequent sight in public. Being part of the Hermits might also garner some looks, but they should be fine here. It's friendly territory.
Wels sticks close to Mumbo either way. Even without seeing his expression, he can tell how carefully Wels examines their environment. Mumbo feels safer having him here. He wouldn't want to come on his own. The building they're looking for is at the edge of the town centre, a tall office building with an angled top. The same pristine white as the rest of them.
"This it?" Wels asks, crossing his arms. He's looking up at the building.
"Yep."
"Fancy." Mumbo can't help a soft noise of amusement. Inside is a wide lobby, with a fountain of all things at the back of the room, cushioned seats and plants filling the space. It's also strangely empty. The front desk is obvious enough. A hologram of a receptionist appears when they get closer.
"Hello and welcome to Dukes Crown Limited!" The voice is like a parody of a person. Mumbo's never liked the voice of AIs. The closer they are to human, the more uncanny they become. "What is your reason for visiting?" The wide smile never changes. Mumbo shivers.
"Mumbo Jumbo, I'm here for a meeting." The hologram remains still before jumping to life, pointing to a lift at the back of the lobby.
"Your meeting is on the thirty fifth floor, office A. Is there anything else I can help you with?"
Mumbo shakes his head quickly, "Nope, that's all, thank you very much."
He's already turned towards the lift as the AI replies, "You're welcome. Enjoy your visit!" Wels joins him as he walks, leaning in close.
"Are they always that creepy?" He whispers, sneaking looks around the empty lobby.
"Unfortunately." He's never been completely comfortable with them. It's all superficial programming. You give something the ability to think and then limit it. "Lobbies aren't usually this empty either. Must be a busy day." Wels hums, sounding unconvinced. He follows Mumbo into the lift anyway, waiting in the corner. It takes Mumbo a second to find the right button. He tries to block out the cheery music and focus on his breathing.
"I don't like this," Wels states what they've both been thinking. Mumbo stares at the door of the lift. He breathes in deep, holding it before letting it out slowly.
"We can't exactly back out now," he says. He's come this far, taken the entire ship off course for this meeting. He knows Xisuma would understand. Gut instincts are there for a reason, as they've all learnt. But Mumbo wants something out of this. Maybe it's selfish.
"We could." Wels gestures to the panel. "We press the button, go straight back down and walk out of that fancy front door."
"You can if you want to," Mumbo tells him. Wels turns to him and Mumbo wishes he could see his expression.
"And leave you alone?" Wels asks. "Absolutely not." Mumbo smiles slightly, watching the number on the display climb until they reach their floor, accompanied by the same artificial voice of the receptionist. Wels steps out first, Mumbo following soon after.
Their suits click against the floors, white plastic beneath them. The walls are halftone between white and blue. It's not particularly appealing, but these offices rarely are. It was a lucky turn of events he ended up how he did. How boring his life would be if he actually made it into one of these.
"Is this the one?" Wels points to a closed door, one of very few on this floor. Mumbo checks the symbol on the side, nodding.
"Looks like it." Wels stands beside Mumbo, resting his hand near his sword.
"You ready to go in?" He asks. Mumbo quickly checks the time, sighing. It doesn't look like he can stall. This whole set-up has brought his anxiety back full force. He knows what he's doing, though. He's practised with the others, he knows not to devalue himself. He's going to be great.
"As I'll ever be." Wels lifts his shoulders, offering an incline of his head. Mumbo smiles back. He raises his hand to knock on the door, but it slides open before he can. Wels makes a quiet noise of surprise behind him. Mumbo shakes his head, stepping into the office.
It's emptier than he's used to. Two bookshelves against the walls, lined with books that look like they've never been read. There's a shutter blocking out the window, leaving the main light the bulb overhead. Towards the back of the room is the desk. It's empty. Mumbo looks to Wels, who's hovering inside the door.
"Do you think we're early?" Wels doesn't get the chance to reply. There's a loud bang from nearby. Mumbo spins in the direction of it just as his suit lets out a warning beep and the light flickers out. When he tries the display it won't turn on. Oh no. "Wels-"
He cuts himself off when he sees him fighting with his helmet, fingers missing the release latch. Mumbo drops his folder, rushing forward and batting Wels's fingers away so he can get to it himself. Wels fights him momentarily but settles when the helmet clicks and Mumbo can slide it off his head.
Fear isn't a stranger to Mumbo. He's certainly feeling it right now. But he's never seen it on Wels before. His eyes are wide until he scrunches them shut, his breath coming out in short puffs and his hair stuck to his forehead. He reaches his hand out and Mumbo offers his own to hold. His heartbeat picks up considerably as he glances around the room. The door has closed and Mumbo has no idea what this is.
"Wels?" He tries, when his breathing has calmed. "You with me?" Wels nods, taking a deep breath in and squeezing Mumbo's hand.
"Helmet stopped getting input." Mumbo winces, glad he didn't wear his.
"It's supposed to release when that happens-" He shakes his head "-I'll look into it. We've got worse problems." Wels blinks hard, standing straight and taking in the situation. His face is still red, but his composure has returned. He finally releases Mumbo's hand.
"The door's shut." Mumbo nods. He examines it, considering the model in his head. The keypad won't even activate when he tries it.
"This model is supposed to open when it loses power," he says, thinking out loud, "It's a safety feature."
"So someone's changed it on purpose."
"Appears so." Mumbo isn't going to think about those implications. "What even was that? Nothing's working." Wels's face is grim, trying to pry the shutters open.
"Localised EMP, I think. Probably only affected this floor."
"Well." Mumbo glares at the door, deciding to pry the keypad open. "This is just wonderful."
"Note to self." Wels ducks under the desk. "Trust our gut instinct." Mumbo makes a noise in response, sorting through the wires in the panel. He knows how these doors work but it doesn't seem to be getting any power. There's no amount of re-ordering wires that can change that. He tries his suit again but gets the same result. They need to get out of here and contact the others.
"Found anything?" He asks when Wels appears again.
Wels shakes his head, "Nothing. I was hoping for an escape latch or... Something." He makes a frustrated noise. "Somebody wants us trapped in here and I'm not going to let that happen."
"Well, I don't think there's any way I can open the door. Unless we can lever it." Wels looks it up and down.
"Right. Last resort." Wels pulls out his sword, launching it at the thin parting in the door. "Please don't break," he murmurs under his breath. In a sharp motion he angles his sword, managing to pry the door open by a crack. "Mumbo!" Mumbo squeezes his elbow in, pushing the door until the gap is wide enough for them both to fit through. Thankfully the only resistance is the weight, rather than any mechanism.
"I doubt the lift will be safe," Mumbo says, checking down the hallways. Wels has his sword by his side, holding it ready. He's left his helmet behind, same as Mumbo's files. An annoying loss, but he's not fighting the door again for them. "Did we pass stairs?"
"I think so." Wels leans on one foot to look down the corridor. "Are those signs?"
Both of their heads jolt in the direction of footsteps down the corridor. There's nowhere obvious to hide. Wels pushes Mumbo into the small alcove by the lift, standing in front of him with his sword to attention. Mumbo can't see his face but his shoulders are set in a tense line. Mumbo reaches for his gun, although he has a feeling it won't work. Neither of them breathe as the footsteps grow closer.
It's two men, dressed in dark clothing. Neither of them look in their direction, focused on the door they should be behind. There's no hint of movement before Wels launches. He butts one of the men on the head with the hilt of his sword, swinging as he drops to knock the gun from the other's hand. He follows it up with a strike against his head with the flat of the blade. Less deadly, but it leaves them incapacitated enough. Wels kicks their guns in Mumbo's direction.
"Anything work?" He asks, pushing the hair from his face back with a scowl. Mumbo scoops the weapons up. His own gun isn't working, so that's great. He plays with the other two, attempting to activate them. He only gets 'access denied' on a small screen.
"It's fingerprint locked. How absurd." He twists the gun to see the underside. "I could rewire it." Wels shakes his head.
"That would take too long," he says, "Our only advantage right now is that they don't know we're free. The blast will have knocked out the cameras on this floor." He nudges one of the grunts with his toe. "When these two don't report in or... Whatever, they'll realise."
"At least we know where the stairs are." Wels smiles, stepping over the grunt. He keeps his sword ready by his side, only slightly bloody.
"That's the spirit." Mumbo exaggerates his sigh and gets an amused puff in response. Wels gestures for him to continue with his hand, both of them making for the stairs.
"What's actually the plan here?" Mumbo asks as they reach the stairwell, thankfully open. Wels leans over the barrier to check below them. "Do we even have one?"
"Nope," Wels pops the 'p'. Well, nothing new there. "Stay behind me."
"Planning to."
He tries to tread lightly down the stairs, difficult with his suit. Wels nearly dances down them, feet ghosting over each step. He stops them both by holding a hand up. Mumbo only stumbles down one stair as he tries to stop. Wels turns, mouthing and pointing them both up around the bend. They press themselves around the stairwell, listening as a few people enter. Mumbo can see Wels relax when they go down away from them.
It's a tense wait for the voices to disappear, punctuated by another door sliding shut. The two wait for a few seconds more.
"This must still operate as an office building," Mumbo murmurs, keeping his voice low.
"It's a big building to rent out just for an elaborate trap." Wels continues down. "Is there usually a back door?" Mumbo hums, trying to think to his adolescence.
"There should be," he replies. Usually into an alleyway, for taking out the trash or something.
"Well, it's that or the front door." Wels checks ahead as they go down another twist. "Which would be a statement."
"They set an EMP off and tried to trap us in a room, Wels."
"A statement," Wels repeats, pausing to give Mumbo a cheeky smile. Mumbo shakes his head. It reminds him of the situation they're actually in. He has no idea what the motivation is for this. At least it's not Convex, he hopes. Variety is the spice of life or whatever. He trusts Wels when he says it was an EMP. There's something very wrong with this situation. Mumbo's a big fan of run first, ask questions later.
They encounter trouble as they reach the ground floor. Wels holds a hand out in front of Mumbo when they hear shouting, both of them stilling. Wels leans forward, listening carefully.
"Head up slightly," he murmurs, pushing Mumbo in the right direction. Mumbo hides around the corner, peering so he can just see Wels. He's pressed against the wall, his breathing measured. He's looking at the ground as the sounds come closer, voices and footsteps.
The door opens and Wels pounces. He kicks behind the knees of the first person, hitting his head with his sword. Without hesitation, he twists to the next, jabbing backwards and knocking them into the person behind. Mumbo is barely breathing, watching Wels's precise movements. Wels is quick to knock their weapons away, hair falling into his face.
A noise behind Mumbo startles him to his feet, raising his arms as he spots more grunts rushing down the stairs. He glances to Wels, finding he's mostly dispatched the ones by him.
"Wels, we need to go!" He calls, rushing down the stairs. Wels drops the last one with a jab to the spine, his shoulders rising with heavy breaths.
"Okay, that's a lot." He grabs Mumbo, narrowly pulling him out the way of a shot. His hand stays around his wrist until they're into the corridor, releasing him to sprint ahead. Mumbo gulps, breaking into a run. He can hear the crackle of electricity hitting the wall beside him, far too close for comfort.
He pauses when he hears a crack of electricity coming from up ahead, calling out a panicked, "Wels!" Wels stops, swerving to the side, but not fast enough to avoid the rope that flies out from a side door. It wraps around his torso, sparking with electricity and pinning his arms to his side. Wels falls with a pained shout. He lands hard on his arm, gasping out for breath. The sword falls too far from Mumbo's reach. He instinctively moves to help until his head kicks in, hearing the shouting around him.
"Hands up!" Mumbo looks at Wels on the ground, his chest heaving as the wire (he can now see that's what it is) crackles again. Wels shifts in place, letting out a weak cry at the pulse as his body tenses. Maybe it's a good thing his hair hides the pained expression Mumbo knows must be there. He raises his hands, allowing one of the grunts to grab his arms and pull them behind his back. Something solid and heavy is secured around his wrists. He almost loses his footing at a sharp tug, turning to see the bloody gash on the guy's head. Maybe Wels should have hit him harder.
A figure enters the corridor that Mumbo is more familiar with.
"Mr. Dukes-" he keeps his voice steady, masking the fear churning in his stomach "-This is an interesting meeting." Internally, he curses the guy out. He only has to take one look at Wels for his morals to disappear. But he knows they're at a disadvantage, and he knows that won't help anything.
"Mumbo," Dukes nods very slightly to acknowledge him before nudging Wels with a pointed toe. Wels groans, trying to curl up and Mumbo bristles. "This would've been much easier if you stayed put." Dukes waves at the grunts. "Take him to an office. I'll move them at nightfall, figure out what to do with the extra." There's a few affirmatives before Mumbo's being dragged away, battling every urge to break free or to call for Wels or something. It feels like he's failed somehow, but he doesn't fight. He doesn't know what to do.
-
Mumbo paces the room they left him in. He's tried everything he can get his restrained hands on, checked the walls, checked the door, the little furniture there is to check. He can't find a way out of here. In the tiniest crack at the base of the shutters, he can tell it's ticking into evening. They've got time. If they're moved to a second location they're absolutely boned.
There's no telling how long it'll take the others to realise something's gone wrong. First it'll be when they don't get an update after the meeting, but when did they expect the meeting to end? Then they'll send a message but how long until they worry about the lack of reply? A deep part of Mumbo is gnawing at him with the knowledge they might mobilise too late. The Hermits stop at nothing to protect their own, but they need to find them first. It's too easy to disappear.
With any luck, Dukes was only after Mumbo. Wels was extra, wasn't he? Turn him into the right governmental body for a quick profit, easy. Just as easy as it would be for the others to break him out. It's himself he's not sure about. He was the target of all this. For his designs, he's guessing. He slumps against the wall, watching the sunlight creeping under the shutter. He pushes away thoughts of what might happen to him. He's sure he'll find out soon enough.
The light outside gradually fades in colour. Mumbo paces the room several more times until it becomes a strong amber, travelling across the carpeted floor. If he stays still for too long he thinks his worry might consume him. He tries his suit a few times as a last ditch effort, knocking it against the wall. He can't even get annoyed at the work it'll take to fix it. He might not get the chance.
He's mid-pace when the door slides open. Two grunts grab his arms, holding him in place in the centre of the room. He scowls, trying to shift their grip. Dukes follows soon after them.
"It has," he replies, falling into the professional tone. "Do I get to know why we couldn't just have a peaceful, ordinary meeting?" Dukes strides forward, his hands clasped neatly behind him back. He's only an inch taller than Mumbo, but he makes him feel tiny.
"It's been some time, hasn't it, Mumbo?" Should've been longer, apparently. Being rejected for that internship destroyed him, back then. The constant comments, the reminders he'd never make anything of himself. All of it. He was so excited to finally prove himself and look at what that gets him.
"You have no idea how valuable you are, do you?"
Mumbo tilts his head side to side, "About ten million, actually, last time I checked." Dukes laughs.
"One of the smartest minds of a generation," Dukes says, "And still unsurprisingly foolish." Mumbo frowns. It's an effort not to reply. "See, I've been working on a project but I need more brains to push it further. It's nearly perfect and once finished, it could change the scene as we know it." Mumbo doesn't know it. He doesn't want to know it.
"That could've been done through negotiation," he replies, "I'm available to hire."
"I don't think I could pay you to work on this." Dukes holds something in front of him. A collar of some kind. There's sharp, thin spikes around the back, on the inside. Mumbo cringes at the sight. "This has been my brainchild for some time. This collar, combined with a remote, taps directly into the wearer's spinal cord. It can stop or send its own signals, allowing control of body parts the wearer can't use, better health management-"
"You want to use it to control people," Mumbo interrupts, the reality sinking in. He glares at Duke, hiding his terror as anger.
"Smart boy."
"You're right. I won't work on it." He edges back into the hands holding him. Dukes laughs again. The sound makes Mumbo feel dizzy.
"You wouldn't just be working on it," Dukes tells him, in the same tone someone would use to talk to a child. "You'd be one of the first test subjects." Mumbo's eyes widen. He pushes back, thrashing to loosen the grip on his arms.
"No- no, no, no-" He's completely broken and he knows it. No going back now. "Get away from me. Take that thing away. You're sick." Dukes stands there, ignoring Mumbo's panic. He opens an antiseptic cloth, running it over the metal points.
"I imagine it'll hurt going in," he explains like he's reading a book. "But we made sure it'll do as little damage as possible. It's getting it out that could mess things up a little."
"You can't do this. You won't get away with it."
"I think I already have-" Dukes steps forward, holding the collar up, "What will you do, call for help? Oh, wait-" A smile with too many teeth "-You won't be able to." Mumbo pushes himself back, drawing in as a last ditch effort to protect himself. He shuts his eyes and hears the crackle of electricity.
Then the hands around his arms release.
He tumbles to the floor, opening his eyes to see a suit he recognises stunning the second grunt. False turns to him, her expression hidden by her helmet.
"Mumbo-" It sounds as if a heavy weight is lifted when she says it. She drops to her knees, gently checking him over. "Are you okay, did he hurt you?"
Mumbo shakes his head, "No I'm... Alright. I'm okay." He's... It might take a minute to believe it. She sighs, resting her glove on his cheek.
"We were so worried. We just-" She shakes her head, standing and turning to the incapacitated people around her. "Let me sort this out first."
"No, please do." Safer than making the same mistake they did. She pulls out her sets of cuffs, securing the grunts first.
"We got a distress signal from Wels. Apparently it's set for if his suit fails. Then we couldn't find either of you- X went near ballistic," she explains as she works. Mumbo listens, her voice a grounding anchor. "We came as soon as we could."
"Who's here?" Mumbo asks. He knows they couldn't fit the entire ship.
"Iskall, Etho and I. Doc's on back up."
"Is Stress there?" False nods. "Wels might be injured. He seemed bad when he went down." She finishes checking the bindings, raising her arm.
"False reporting," she pauses for an unheard response, "I've got Mumbo. No injuries but he says Wels might be. Tell Stress to be prepared." Mumbo wishes he could hear the conversation, but False lowers her arm afterwards. She hesitates when she sees the collar, picking it up cautiously.
"What even is this?" She asks, helmet tilting to Mumbo. He shudders, drawing his legs closer to himself.
"It's a... controlling device. It accesses your spinal cord to send nerve signals. Lets you control someone." False looks at it for a long second, then to Mumbo.
"He was about to put this on you." She sounds breathless. Mumbo looks into his lap, can't find the words to reply. He might break down if he does. "I'm getting those cuffs off and getting you out. What are the authorities like here?" She leaves the collar to the side.
"They're not awful," Mumbo explains as she works on the restraints around his wrists, "But someone with money and influence like him... He'd probably find a way out of it." She makes a frustrated noise just as the restraints fall away. Mumbo's muscles ache in relief. He rubs at the soreness around his wrists.
"We'll see what we can do," she decides. She offers him a hand. He stumbles forward, kept upright by her firm grip. "Who is he? I'm assuming that's the leader." She dips her head in Dukes' direction. Mumbo sighs.
"Tristan Dukes. Everyone in the city knows him. Well-known for his innovation and inventions, donates regularly to charities. Most inspiring inventors want to work for him." Mumbo gives his wrist a last squeeze. "I tried going for an internship here. It didn't go well. Probably good I didn't get it, if this is what he's doing behind the scenes."
"If I wasn't afraid of waking him up then I'd kick him harder." Mumbo can't help an amused snort. His legs are still trembling.
"That's not very do-gooder of you, False." She laughs, bumping his side gently enough it doesn't knock him over.
"What X doesn't know can't hurt him." He breathes a little easier at her light tone. She reaches for her belt, placing a stun gun in his hands. "You ready to get out of here?" Mumbo glances to the door. He'd like to see Wels, get proof he's okay. But he'll only get in the way. The three of them are a well-oiled machine on missions like this.
"Absolutely." It's a cause for celebration when he steps out of that office prison on its own. "How did you guys get here?" It would be a bit obvious to have a crew in their full suits through the city.
False makes a high-pitched "Well." She shrugs, sounding not very sheepish. "We took one of the ships. Then we may've borrowed a few cars."
"Borrowed," Mumbo repeats. She holds her hands up.
"Hey, we fully plan on returning them this time!" Mumbo shakes his head, following behind her. She raises her arm. "False again-" Pause "-Yeah, I'm getting Mumbo out. Left three people in the office. Floor forty, office B. The one in the fancy clothes is the owner of the company, Tristan Dukes. I want a background check on him. Dig up all the dirt you can find. He's not going free." She hums, glancing at Mumbo. "Okay. Keep me updated."
"Who was that?" Mumbo asks. False starts moving towards the exit, giving her gun a quick check over.
"Ren," she replies. "He's doing comms from home. We should be all set." And isn't he glad to hear that?
Their escape goes better than his and Wels did. Any grunts on the staircase have already been dealt with, tied up in neat batches for the police to find. False still scopes out each corner, all business as they move through. It's the side door they leave through. The cool air in the alley nearly makes him sag in relief. The night is almost on them. She leads him through a network of alleys, head twitching towards any sounds she hears. The distant traffic is a quiet undertone. She approaches a parked car, knocking on the window of it.
The door swings open, Doc inviting Mumbo into the seat. Mumbo near collapses into it, shutting his eyes and leaning against the headrest.
"Mumbo," Doc greets. Mumbo cracks his eyes open, giving a tired smile. "It sure is good to see you."
"Yeah. Yeah, I could say the same." He's ready to sink into this seat forever. Doc rubs his shoulder and Mumbo allows himself to be pushed.
"What are you doing?" Doc looks to False, who's bouncing in place. Mumbo follows his gaze, listening along.
"I'm going to head back in," she tells him. "Can I trust you've got Mumbo?"
"Won't let him out of my sight." Mumbo rolls his eyes, slouching further into the seat.
"I am sitting right here." False laughs, patting his head.
"I'll keep in touch. Stay safe."
Doc nods, "You too." She offers a quick nod, closing the door and darting back into the alleys. Doc turns to Mumbo. He's smiling, but Mumbo can tell concern when he sees it. "How are you doing, man?" Mumbo sighs.
"Exhausted," he admits. "I don't think I've processed it properly at all."
"Understandable," Doc replies. "What even happened in there?" Mumbo groans, rearranging himself to rest against Doc's side. The suits aren't comfortable, but it helps to know someone is behind him after being alone in that room. He sticks his feet on the seat so his legs shield him from the door.
"Meeting could've gone better." Doc laughs deeply at that one, careful not to knock Mumbo off.
"Well, that's one way to put it." Mumbo smiles to himself, resting his eyes.
"Got into the office, EMP went off, broke out the room, nearly got out but got caught, rescued by False." He isn't going to mention the collar, or his history with Dukes. He'll save reliving that for the official report. "Think that covers it."
"Yikes."
"Yep."
"Guess it's not just Cub and Scar we gotta worry about, huh." Mumbo presses his hands to his face with a noise of displeasure.
"I don't even want to think about that. I do not want this to be a reoccurring nightmare." Doc chuckles, patting Mumbo's shoulder carefully.
"You'll be fine. Hopefully, it'll all be sorted after this. And you've got us. We're pretty terrifying." It takes a bit of effort, but Mumbo leans his head back far enough to see Doc's eyes.
"You know what, I'm holding you to that." He yawns, the energy that's been keeping him going has drained. He can tell he's crashing. "Protect me from businessmen with delusions of grandeur."
"Oh, of course." Doc's voice is dry. "I'll let Iskall know." Mumbo chuckles, shaking his head. He closes his eyes again, accepting he might not stay awake much longer.
"Big scary Iskall."
"He was big and scary when he found out you were in trouble."
"That's Iskall," he agrees. It's nice knowing that they all care about him. He wouldn't be forgotten. They'd keep looking until they found him.
He doesn't realise he's dozed off until he's being gently moved. He blinks his eyes open and realises he's now lying across the seats. Looking up, he finds Doc resting his hand on Mumbo's side. He's talking to someone out of eye-line. Mumbo relaxes. If Doc's there, then he's fine. He has no doubt in his mind about that at all.
The next time he wakes up, it's because he's being nudged awake. Doc is next to him, with a gentle smile.
"Hey, sleepyhead," he greets, sitting back so Mumbo can sit upright. He yawns, covering his hand with his mouth. "We're back at the ships. Got some stuff to finish up before we go back home."
"Is it finished?" Mumbo asks, rubbing his eyes. When he looks out the window, he recognises the hangar parking.
"Yep." Doc crosses his arms, leaning back in his seat. "There was an incident-"
"Is Wels okay?" Mumbo interjects, fear twisting his stomach. Doc's expression softens as he nods.
"Wels is fine. Fractured his arm and a little bruised, but Stress has got him. He was asleep last I heard." Mumbo sighs, his chest finally expanding again. He sinks back into the seat. He has no idea how they've made it out of this situation as lucky as they have. "You wanna head into the ship? Let one of the others return this car." Mumbo nods. Would be nice to avoid running into the law after all this.
When he gets closer to the ship, he can hear shouting. He frowns, pressing closer to Doc. Doc simply rolls his eyes.
"They're still going," he murmurs.
"Still?"
Doc shakes his head, "Don't worry about it."
He leans over to open the ship door. The arguing silences immediately. False and Iskall turn to them as they enter. They're helmet-less, although False's hair is still in a bun at the bottom of her head.
"Mumbo!" Iskall moves before Mumbo can react, nearly knocking them over as he wraps his arms around him. Mumbo's brain momentarily malfunctions, taking a second to remember to hug Iskall back. "I was so worried, don't you dare do that again."
"I wasn't planning to, but I'll let you know." Iskall steps back, keeping his hands on Mumbo's forearms.
"And you're okay? How are you feeling?"
"I'm-" The lie nearly slips out before Mumbo thinks about it. He sighs, answering truthfully. "I'm a bit shaken. Finding it hard to believe that all happened, honestly."
"We've got you, okay?" Iskall reminds him. "I'll listen if you want to talk." Mumbo nods. He's not sure when that will be, but he knows it'll do him good.
"Will Xisuma want a proper report?"
"Not until you and Wels are rested up," False says, "He's pleased you're safe." She nods to Doc. "We're going to take the car back."
"Make sure you check in," Iskall tells them.
"We will," Doc reassures, offering a wave as they head outside. The ship feels much emptier with the two of them gone.
"Do you want to see Wels?" Iskall asks. Mumbo didn't realise how much he wanted that until now.
"Yes. Yes, I'd very much like that." Iskall smiles, leading Mumbo through the ship. It's bigger than the one he and Wels took. Offers more than three rooms. Iskall takes them into one of the side doors. Mumbo can immediately see the pink of Stress's suit as she moves around the room, humming a tune to herself. She pauses when she sees them in the doorway.
"Oh! Mumbo, you're back!" She smiles. Mumbo spots Etho curled in a chair on his phone. He raises a hand to acknowledge them. "You're not secretly hiding any injuries are you?"
Mumbo laughs, shaking his head, "No, I promise I'm okay. No injuries on me." She pokes her finger into her cheek.
"And you wouldn't mind me checking?"
"Um, if you want to."
She beams at him, "Nah, you're fine!" Iskall scoffs, gesturing out.
"How come that doesn't work for me? This is bias. Surely that's against oath."
"Iskall, love," Stress starts, her voice dangerously sweet, "Your idea of a minor injury is a stab wound. You've lost trust privileges." Iskall makes a noise of protest whilst Mumbo breaks into laughter. He can see Etho smiling out the corner of his eye.
There's a groan from the bed, then a teasing voice, "Who let you lot in?" Wels pushes himself up with one arm. The bulk of his suit is gone, only the black under-layer left. His other arm is bound by tight fabric to his chest. More interestingly, his hair has been neatly plaited out of his face.
"You shouldn't be moving, mister!" Stress scolds, jumping to move the pillows so he can sit up. "No jostling that arm."
"Yes ma'am," Wels replies. He laughs when Stress flicks his cheek, batting her away with his uninjured arm. Mumbo feels like he can finally breathe properly for the first time since all of this started. Wels looks at him, his expression soft. "Good to see you, Mumbo." His voice turns serious when he asks, "You're okay?"
"I'm fine. Virtually untouched." He holds his arms out before remembering he's still wearing his full suit. "Don't know if I can say the same for you." Wels laughs, sinking into the pillows.
"It's only a broken arm."
"Only," Iskall teases, "Like you're not going to complain when you still can't use it in a week."
Wels hums, "Well, Stress gave me painkillers, so I'm not exactly hurting right now." Stress waves her hands.
"All of you have complexes, I swear! You're gonna gain nothing by sitting there all miserable and sore!" She sounds genuinely exasperated. Mumbo is guilty of falling into that category.
"Admit it, you just like seeing us all loopy." Iskall tilts his head towards her. Stress flashes a smirk, resting her cheek in her palm.
"You can't prove it."
"That's admittance." Etho chimes in, keeping his eyes on his phone, fingers moving impossibly fast.
"I- I don't think that's how you use that word." Iskall frowns, his face scrunching in confusion.
"They're all made up anyway," Etho replies, "I'll use them how I want."
"Stress?" Wels asks, turning to her. His voice is perfectly polite.
"Yes?"
"Can I have more painkillers for the headache they're giving me?" Mumbo barely holds back his laughter. Iskall doesn't, doubling over with it. It only gets stronger when Etho makes a noise, looking disappointed at his phone.
"Yeah, I think you're going to be okay." Iskall pats the bed by Wels's feet. Stress finally sighs, standing fully and shepherding the two in.
"If you're going to clutter the room up then get some chairs. We can have a sleepover." Mumbo smiles, getting pushed into the chair Iskall slides under him.
"Woohoo," Iskall cheers dryly.
"Does that mean I get ice cream?" Wels asks, "I think I deserve ice cream."
"You need more sleep, is what you need." At Wels's dramatic noise she adds, "Ice cream when you wake up."
Iskall sticks his hand up, "Do the rest of us get some?"
"I want ice cream," Etho adds. Stress breathes in slowly, closing her eyes.
"You lot are gonna be the end of me," she announces with a smile. "Go to sleep." Mumbo laughs. Despite his impromptu nap, he can already feel tiredness settling in again. Surrounded by everyone teasing each other, it's not hard to drift off. Nothing's going to get him here.
-
"He was going to put that collar on him," False explains. Her arms are folded, back straight. The hologram of Xisuma frowns, a surprising display of emotion during a debrief. "If I'd been literally seconds later, X, I don't know what we'd be dealing with."
"And he's doing okay?" Xisuma asks, concern in his voice.
"He's dozing with Wels," Iskall replies. "He said it hasn't set in yet. I've told him I'll be there if he wants to talk about it. Stress and Doc are with them."
"Okay. And Wels?" The two glance at Etho.
"He wasn't great when I found him," Etho explains, his mission voice in full force. "We think he's broken his arm and he was giving me static shocks, so probably electrocuted. Won't know more unless they open up, but they seemed in good spirits earlier." Iskall nods in agreement. It's concerning him how quickly they've both settled. As if nothing traumatic happened. That's the most insidious kind. The one that punches you later.
"What about the people responsible?" All three of them share glances at that. False swallows.
"We secured most of the grunts. The authorities have picked them up." She made sure of it herself.
"But?" Xisuma prompts.
"The main guy, Dukes or whatever, completely vanished." Bitterness is still heavy in Iskall's tone. False sighs.
"I left him in the room, out cold, whilst I got Mumbo out of there. He was gone by the time I got back and so was the collar."
"None of us saw him leave," Etho adds.
"This is... More concerning. So that device is still out there."
"It won't be easy for him to build himself back up after this," False explains, "Most of the papers are already linking it to his company."
"That's no guarantee," Etho points out. "There's ways to place blame, claim he had no idea."
"Or he'll use it to go even deeper," Iskall comments. Xisuma taps his fingers on his arm, the hologram flickering as he thinks.
"Have you told Mumbo or Wels about this?" He asks, finally. He always puts his crew first.
"We've... No," Iskall admits.
"We're not sure how to."
"Make sure you do," Xisuma tells them, "Before you get back tomorrow." He pauses, looking over the camera. "Well, today now. Consider yourselves dismissed. We can have a full debrief when you're back on the ship." The three nod. They exchange a brief farewell before the hologram shuts off. Iskall turns to False, resting his hand on her arm to stop her rushing off.
"I'm sorry for shouting earlier," he apologises, straight to the point. "This has stressed me out more than I'd like, and finding out that scum got away just-" He breaks off. False smiles.
"It's okay. I get it." She couldn't believe it when she got back and he was gone. Then nobody knew where and her blame had to fall somewhere. "But they're with us, now. We're all safe. We got there in time."
"We nearly didn't."
"But we did," Etho states, joining the conversation. "Don't get stuck on the ifs right now. They're going to need us."
Iskall nods. "Right. Yeah." He perks himself up. "After mission nap?" False shakes her head, the three heading back through the ship.
"It's past midnight," she reminds him.
"After mission bedtime," Etho suggests. Iskall laughs, but nods along.
"Things could've gone worse," he states. False claps lightly, aware of the possible sleeping hermits.
"There you go! That's more like it."
"Mission successful-ish," Etho agrees.
"We got them back," False says, "That's the main thing."
"Yeah."
None of them want to consider the alternative.
#space outlaws#space outlaws au#hermitcraft#yeah im maintagging this one took work#my writing#anyway for my usual rambles#theres a few things i think would work differently in the au#but were more fun to include#yes i created a whole villain for this#idk if ill use him in the future#but i thought id leave it open in case#spoilers if u havent read it yet:#wels doesnt panic because of his helmet malfunctioning#he panics because of the emp#but he wont tell mumbo that#fun fact :)
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Criminal In My Mind: Chapter 1
Warning: foul language
Pairing: Choi Minho x Reader
Word count: 2k
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction made for personal entertainment of readers. The writer does not ever intend to offend her readers nor does she aim to spread false information about anyone as to pay any disrespect to the real-life persons whom the characters are based on. She also does not claim ownership to any of the images that are being used.
masterlist
Y/N
“What... What’s happening?”
Different voices sound faint in the background. I try to adjust as my sight is still cloudy. I have no idea where I am. I start to fail catching my breath as soon as I realize that I can’t feel my arms when I attempt to feel my head where there’s excruciating pain other than the rest of my body aches all over.
Although everything is dark and blurry, I noticed that I’m sitting down with my knees bent to my face, a cloth smelling of gasoline fumes covers my nose and mouth. I’m in a cramped space that I can hardly move in, some kind of a big container. I look up and I see a small hole with light shining through.
What is going on? I can hear myself breathing rapidly.
Two men appear from above me and grab me forcefully on both of my arms to stand me up as I feel another severe pain. This time it’s somewhere on my hip.
Shit, it hurts! It hurts, it hurts. It fucking hurts!
Still catching up with my breath, my sight is fading black again while I hear drilling and hammering but I can’t tell where it’s coming from. I feel myself being dragged as burns forming on my heels. I start to panic—trying to jerk every part of my body, trying to break free. I’d shout for help but my lips down to my throat are too dry as if frozen.
I must have passed out for a minute because the next thing I know is complete silence and complete darkness. Suddenly, in front of me appears another man with blood all over his hands and a sledgehammer in one. “Stay still,” he says.
I try to scream again and finally, my voice rips out the loudest that I can, “Help!”
“Shh, relax, this is just a-”
“Dream!”
I jolt up. My pores drip with cold sweat and my heart throbs as if to break free from my ribs.
“It was just a dream,” I think out loud.
It’s been over a year since I last dreamt something about what happened when I was thirteen. I don’t even remember what exactly happened anymore. I just remember exactly how it felt, how terrifying it was. How I thought I was going to die. I’m not even sure how I survived, especially my surgeon. I received quite a beating from that event, such as severe bruises and deep cuts all over my body, internal bleeding along my insides. Two rib bones were so complicatedly twisted on my lower right flank that I needed surgery just for the doctors to fix them, which left a big scar down my side. I don’t know what’s worse: remembering how everything happened or remembering how it all felt. The memory of it all, although unclear...
I get freighted by the vibration of my phone against my nightstand. Jinki is calling.
“Lee Jinki, isn’t it too early for a flirtatious phone call? I’m not in the mood.”
“Oh, hey! I didn’t expect you to pick up right away. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, just a bad dream. Gonna take a shower. I’m late for-”
“Wait! Stop by for breakfast. It’s on me.”
I roll my eyes and hang up. Jinki and I dated shortly after college for like a week or two so nothing was serious. We’re good friends now but he’s still claiming that there is still some kind of remaining spark between us. It’s getting old so I just always assume he’s joking every time he tells me that.
I decided not to wash my hair and just let it loose since I really am going to be late for work and I hate to bother going out with wet hair. I get dressed, I go for a pastel pink long-sleeved shirt tucked into a pair of high-waisted light blue jeans and my ivory cream high-top Chucks. I don’t bother for any makeup, which rarely happens, and rush out the front door then lock it behind me.
I hop on a cab taking it that there won’t be a bus stopping any second now.
I arrive at Jinki’s café, which is just on the next parallel street of the flower shop and just two neighborhoods away from home, “Hi, I’m here,” I call out even before I spot him.
“Good morning, Y/n!” Jinki greets cheerfully with his usual bright smile. “Wait, I think there’s something different,” he gestures both of his hands on my face.
“Oh, maybe it’s because I haven’t put any makeup-”
“You’re extra beautiful today,” his smile widens, and eyes almost disappear.
“-on,” I grit my teeth at him. “You shut up, Jinki! I’ll see you later,” I walk out the glass doors and nod at the barista as thanks for opening them for me.
I flash all the way to the flower shop that my sock slips off from my heel when I walk in, to already witness an early customer.
“There she is! My favorite employee. Y/n, sweetie, please come and talk to this fine lady right here. She has a lot of questions that are far beyond my energy to handle.”
“Sorry, I’m late, Mr. Lee. And everybody knows I’m your only employee who isn’t your son,” I joke back as Taemin pops in yawning, still in his morning glory.
“And everybody also knows that my son sucks at his job,” Mr. Lee shouts and smacks the back of his son’s head then points to another customer that has just walked in, ordering him to go and entertain.
As I mind my own customer, I catch a small glimpse of the guy Taemin’s talking to, who looks unimpressed. He has dark hair in a layered bowl style with his fringe covering more than half his forehead and would’ve definitely looked cuter if he smiled. They seem to already know each other. Weird thing is I feel like I’ve met him before. Was he in one of my classes in college? Does he go to the same gym class I do?
“For the petunia bouquet, can you add something else so it won’t look so plain?” the nice lady inquires further.
“Absolutely. Maybe I’ll add some purple azaleas or lilies, or maybe both if you’d like. What do you think?”
“Great! I’ll just entrust this on you, dear, okay?”
“No problem,” I assure her, not breaking a smile while I work the cash register for her down payment, I take one more quick look at the guy, who may now think I’m creepy so I’ll stop now. I hand over the receipt to the lady in front of me.
“Thanks! I’ll come back Friday to pick them up,” she announces.
“Thank you for coming in! I’ll make sure to ready your bouquets by then. Have a nice day!” I say, still smiling, opening the door for her to walk out.
As soon as I approach the guys, the other customer, probably coincidentally, is just walking out of the shop. I don’t know about everybody else who’s met him but he seems hostile to me.
And really really familiar. I can’t point my finger at it. “You know him?” I ask Taemin beside me.
“Yeah, we’re in a photography class together,” he tells me. “I tend to talk to him at school but he’s kind of scary.”
“Seems likely.”
“But I like him. I think he’s better once I get to know him.”
I laugh. “Anyway, what time do your classes start this afternoon?”
“2 o’clock.”
“Great. Can you deliver those bouquets due today for me? Please and thank you!” I sweetly ask him, pointing at a big box across the counter.
“Sure thing, Noona. Tell Dad I’ll be home late tonight,” he informs me while grabbing his backpack and the box of deliveries.
“Hot date?” I tease him.
“We’re just friends,” he said with a jokingly evil grin and a wink.
“Hey, Lee Taemin, don’t do anything stupid!”
Just like that, he’s out the door before I even finish my sentence.
Lunchtime is finally here. I’ve been arranging flowers all morning and handling customers whenever somebody comes in. Although I could never complain about my job since this is what I’ve ever wanted growing up.
I was born and raised in a different city where my parents live to this day about a two-hour drive away from here, or three hours if you took the bus since it has a lot of stops and depending on traffic. I moved to this city in my first year of college.
My mom and dad had been tight with me growing up, especially with academics, since they both have families that got master’s degrees and PhDs. At first, I didn’t mind studying hard and graduating with honors because I didn’t really know what I wanted to be in the future at the time. However, the more I aged, the more I realized that I hated studying. I’m not smart enough like my parents and my cousins and they had no idea how hard I must have worked in order for me to please them. I hated the attention whenever I received a first-place certificate or won local quiz bees and academic decathlons because, you know what, none of the trophies and medals I earned made me happy.
When I was kidnapped and held captive in some kind of box for days, all I thought about was flowers. I was missing my mom’s garden at home, and how it smelled in the morning before I went to school. I figured that flowers were all that I drew with crayons in kindergarten. It was the highlight of my days. At the time, in that container, I had foreboded that I was going to die.
Since the universe provided me a second chance to live, that’s when my life began. I did not want to be an academic overachiever, I wanted to have fun. Since then, my parents always scolded me for getting a B or a C, but I didn’t care. At least I never neglected my studies.
The day came when I had to move out to go to college and I couldn’t be more excited. Still without neglecting my academics, I started partying almost every weekend and dated whoever I wanted. Although, I honestly have never been in love before.
The rest is history, I found Mr. Lee’s flower shop. I applied for a job here three years ago, before I graduated.
“Did somebody order lunch?” Jinki walks into the shop. “How’s my love doing?”
“Fine, thank you for asking. And shut up,” I say. “You didn’t have to do this. You already gave me breakfast.”
“Oh, no, I don’t want my girl to starve,” he winks at me.”
“Hey, Lee Jinki! Give me a break, won’t you? I’m not yours.”
“Come on, I’m kidding. It already sank into me that you’re never gonna be mine. Plus, I actually met somebody.”
“No shit, really? Who?” I ask, surprised.
“I’m not gonna tell you now. We just started seeing each other and we’re not exclusive yet. I don’t even know if she likes me.”
“Well, I’m glad to see you moving on. Let me meet her when you’re ready.” I say to him as I pinch his cheek.
“Here we go,” he says after laying out all the food on the counter.
“Looks good, thank you,” I’m always thankful for Jinki. Even though we didn’t work out as romantic partners, I’m glad we’re friends. “Oh, by the way, Kibum is coming into town this Friday.”
“Oh, great. I only got to meet him once before but I think he’s really funny. How long ago was it when he last visited?” he asks while his mouth is full with rice.
“I think it was over a month ago when he told me the news about his engagement.”
“Looks like we have a fun weekend ahead. Although I might not join you the next day since I’m going home to my mom’s.”
“Great! Say hi to her for me.”
Chapter 2
#ktm cimm c1#ktm cimm#shinee fanfic#shinee fanfiction#shinee fanfics#minho x reader#shinee fluff#shinee smut
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it was arrogance to think you knew how to handle this - chapter 2
yeah, sorry. not enough time has passed between the posting of the last chapter for me to provide any new insight! again, scroll down my blog for the ao3 link if interested.
chapter 2: green to blue
Gordon immediately rushes to Josh's room, who he wakes when he scoops him out of bed. At first he's groggy and confused, but Joshua is comforted by his father's presence and quickly falls back asleep. Gordon holds his son, the most precious thing in his life, as he sits on his couch. He holds the kitchen knife tightly, away from Joshua.
He's not sure why nothing is happening. Gordon is half an hour deep into planning a move in his head when he realizes this. The Fae who was outside seems to have just done... nothing? Gordon's not entirely willing to believe they've just given up.
The sun begins to rise. The clock begins to creep closer to a time Gordon would usually wake up. He convinces himself, maybe, that the random Fae was just a one-off encounter. Gently, Gordon sets Joshua down on the couch, making sure he's still covered by the blanket from his room. He doesn't really want to leave Joshua's side, but at least he can still see him from the kitchen.
Joshua will probably be up soon, and Gordon wants to have breakfast ready by then. Having something to eat will occupy Josh for at least a little bit, which means any chaos he causes today will be delayed for at least a little bit.
As quietly as he can, Gordon starts sorting through his kitchen. He leaves the knife on the counter, within reach should the need arise. Normally he wouldn't make pancakes without a special occasion, but after the stress of last night, let alone the stress of the past month, he thinks he deserves some goddamn pancakes.
It's extremely easy to disappear into a task. Making breakfast while keeping an eye on Joshua is enough that Gordon doesn't begin asking himself questions, like why Fae would even be coming around and asking for Joshua now. He pushes thoughts like those aside, because he's a rational adult who's fully capable of compartmentalizing! He can have a panic attack later, when they've safely skipped town!
Once Josh wakes up, he's quick to his father's side, repeating "Pancakes! Pancakes! Pancakes!" Josh jumps as he speaks, grabbing onto the edge of Gordon's shirt.
Well, Gordon thinks, Fae or not, kids love pancakes. He picks Josh up, holding him with one arm as he flips a pancake. "Whoah, no good morning?" he teases.
Josh grumbles out a, "Good morning" before attempting to climb over his father towards the stack of finished pancakes.
"Slow down there, kid," he says, pushing Joshua's insistent hand away from the plate. "What makes you think you're getting any?"
The absolute look of betrayal that Josh's face turns into is absolutely hilarious, so much so that Gordon has to stop himself from completely bursting into laughter. "But I want them!" Josh insists.
"Yeah, well, maybe I made them all for myself. Didn't think of that now, did you?"
Joshua furrows his brow and attempts to wiggle out of Gordon's grasp towards the pancakes. The safety hazard that is Josh messing around near a heated iron pan is not lost on Gordon, who cries out, "Josh, hey!" The words scare Josh enough that he freezes, allowing Gordon the chance to get Josh back on the floor, away from the stove top.
"Joshua," he says, in a typical dad warning tone. "What's the rule when Daddy's cooking?"
"Be careful around fire and pans," Josh mumbles, looking towards the floor. Gordon sighs, relieved both for Josh's safety and the fact he knew the rule. Gordon kneels in front of his son.
"I know it was an accident, okay?" he assures him, placing his hands on Josh's shoulders. "I just got real scared, there. That pan's hot enough that it'll hurt me if I touch it, you could have gotten seriously hurt." Which is... definitely something Gordon doesn't want to think about the implications of. He doesn't know if iron and fire burning stacks for a Fae, but he'd rather not find out.
Josh reaches forward and hugs Gordon, and for a moment, that anxiety is gone. Gordon just hugs his son back. He takes a deep breath, internalizes it for a moment, and then gets back to dad business. He pulls back.
"Why don't you go sit at the table, and I'll get some pancakes ready for you?" Gordon suggests. Josh's eyes immediately light up, and he nods happily. Gordon smiles as Josh climbs into his usual chair at the table.
Hopefully, that filled today's Joshua Incident quota.
- - - -
For most of the morning, it rains, which Gordon is thankful for as it means he doesn't need to provide to actual reason he wants to keep Josh inside. However, it doesn't stop Gordon's eyes from straying towards the window, keeping an eye out for any movement. Even as Josh rambles as he scribbles vaguely humanoid shapes, Gordon can't find himself completely able to focus.
Because, horrifyingly, someone came to his front door with the purpose of taking his child. All Gordon can think about is potential encounters with this Fae increasing in severity. What the fuck do they even want Joshua for? It seems like a reversal from the old warnings he would hear growing up, that Fae would steal a human child and replace it with one of their own. Oh, if only Gordon could laugh at that now. Instead, he's clenching his teeth so hard that not even a single "hah" could pass through.
"Josh," Gordon says suddenly, interrupting the four-year-old mid-rant about princesses. Joshua looks up at his father, orange crayon stilled.
Despite Joshua's more chaotic tendencies, Gordon's heart swells when he looks at him. He thinks about their house, the place he's raised Josh in for the past four years. It's where he brought his son home for the first time, where Josh took his first steps, said his first words. The place their little family of two lives.
Which is why Gordon takes a deep breath before he says, "What do you think about moving?"
"Moving?" Josh parrots, his head tilting to the side slightly.
"Yeah, moving," Gordon keeps his voice steady. "Like to a new house. Somewhere else."
Josh turns back to his paper and continues drawing. "Um, all our stuff is here," he remarks.
"We'd take that with us, buddy," Gordon chuckles.
Joshua's eyes light up. "Let's take the house with us!"
Gordon hears the mail slot on the front door jostle, like someone is having trouble getting a letter through. Weird, they don't usually get mail. He decides to check on it later.
He shakes his head. "We can't take the house."
Joshua's bright smile turns to a frown. "But I like the house." He grips his crayon a little harder.
"The whole point of moving is that we get a new house," Gordon explains, but Josh still doesn't look too happy.
"But I wanna stay in this house! I wanna take it with!" Joshua begins shouting, and dear god, Gordon does not need to deal with this now. He's halfway through formulating a response when...
"Bro, just take the house with you."
Both Freemen snap their heads towards the hallway, where the strange voice came from. Gordon's heart nearly stops, as he recognizes the Fae from last night (or, more accurately, earlier in the morning). Except, he isn't exactly person-sized anymore. No, the Fae is closer to the size of Gordon's hand this time around, but that does not stop the anger that begins to rise in him.
"I don't understand the problem," the now small Fae says, absentmindedly scratching the stubble on their face. "S'not like you can't just take the house somewhere else."
Gordon shouts, "You again!?" at the same time as Joshua's, "Little guy!" He's almost too slow to stop Josh from running towards the Fae, grabbing him by the back of the shirt and holding him with one arm. It's easier, actually, to grab the Fae, who's four inches tall and doesn't make any effort to flee.
"What the fuck is your problem!?" Gordon yells into the tiny Fae's face. He ignores Joshua's scandalized gasp.
The Fae just looks annoyed and crosses their arms. "Man, I told you this, like, six hours ago. You should've remembered better." They point down at Joshua. "Just, um, give us the baby thing and we're all gonna leave you alone."
"I'm not going to give you my son!"
The Fae hums for a moment. "What if I like, marry you. Then it's also my son and I can take it."
"Wh- no!" Gordon sputters, "First of all, don't call my kid an it! Second-"
Gordon's cut off when the Fae begins to sing, small blue orbs flying into Gordon's face. Because, suddenly, a whole chunk of Gordon's anxiety and rage is gone, and he can't really remember why he was so mad in the first place. Mostly he feels... confused? He can faintly hear Josh saying, "That's pretty!"
Gordon gently lets Josh down on the ground, but he still keeps a grip on the Fae in his hand. "What did you just do to me?" he asks, his voice a little too unsure.
"Calm down," is all the Fae says. "Just give me the kid?"
Very suddenly, Gordon's anger returns tenfold, because of course that's why he was so upset, how could he forget? He's about to give this little shit a piece of his mind, but then Joshua sings. A stream of green and blue orbs exit his mouth, just like the one the Fae just used on him.
"Oh shit," the Fae, for once, looks thrown off. They squirm a bit. "You didn't tell me little dude was a mimic, man."
Gordon, once again, feels entirely unprepared for what he just witnessed. After a long pause, all he manages to get out is, "I've never seen him do that before."
The Fae laughs, but to be honest, it sounds more like cackling. "No shit. He can only do that when I'm around, because he's copying me. Stupid." They sigh. "He'll be able to do it a lot more if you just let him come with me, man. It would be way more fun."
Gordon's gaze finally returns to the itty bitty Fae in his hand. Walking them back to the front door, Gordon chucks them as far as he can into the woods.
#hlvrai#half life vr but the ai is self aware#gordos feetman#gordos freeman#benrey#joshua freeman#fae au#frenrey#eventually#it was arrogance to think#my writing
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The Doctor
Summary: Henrik finds himself the doctor of a household full of people who look a lot like him.
Warnings: Death mention, gore, possession, kidnapping, medical procedures
Well, it’s only been 7 months since I posted The Magician. I think it’s high time I updated this au, don’t you?
@egopocalypse
Peter's death consumes Dr Schneeplestein's mind as he cycles home. He'll have to look his wife in the eye and explain to her that their accountant was gone. She'll probably be mad. He doesn't want her to be mad. He wants her to be empathetic. Peter was more than his accountant, he was his friend as well. And their children, he's sure they have children, they are likely to bother him with trivial things like homework. Who cares about what they did at school today? He is going to lock himself in the spare bedroom for the rest of the evening. He needs the time alone.
Distracted by these thoughts, he takes the wrong path which inevitably directs him to a house he knows is not his own. Well, that's just great. He's gotten himself lost. This is the last thing he needs right now. Best to ask the residents if they could send him back on his way. God knows he doesn't want to be aimlessly pedalling around for ages.
A man immediately speaks over his shoulder upon taking one look at him. "Jack, I think Sean's posted the video."
The one he guesses is Jack emerges. "Fantastic. Hey, buddy, I'm Jack. And this is Marvin. Come on inside."
"I just wanted to go home."
The smile falters. "Oh, sure. Didn't realise you lived somewhere else. How about you stay here for a minute first? We can sort everything out."
He needed their help so... fine. If they insisted. "Please do not be long."
It is brief, as the two strangers had promised. The three of them discuss the situation. Jack maintained a YouTube channel with his friend Sean. The videos from the channel enabled Sean's ability to bring the characters he played to life. The community surrounding the channel played their part in all of it too, yet it was Sean who usually lay the foundation. That sounded reasonable.
Marvin, it appeared, was capable of performing magic. Quite fond of plants as well. While as welcoming as Jack, there was an off-putting air about the magician. Not judgemental as such but... well, Schneeplestein couldn't quite work it out. It didn't matter. Marvin was friendly enough.
The young superhero is inappropriately loud as he enters. They were having a conversation and this kid just bursts in. Jackie, which was apparently the hero's name, comes across as friendly once he realises his mistake. Schneeplestein interrupts him as he rambles about a recent sighting. Yes, there is a house not too far from here. The doctor should know, it is his. Jackie is tasked with directing him home.
As they walk, Jackie proves to be talkative. He makes up for Schneeplestein's lack of contribution by filling the silence. It would seem the doctor was made in response to Jackie nearly dying from exsanguination. That was... interesting. When asked more about his family, he realises he doesn't know. He can't even tell him what his children's names are. He can't remember. Why can't he remember their names?! They are his children! His wife!
This must have been reported back as Jack asks to meet up the next morning. The doctor happily accepts. The talk leads to working out what his name was. He had to be more than Dr Schneeplestein. One of Jack's suggestions is Leo. It triggers a reaction within him. With some thought, the doctor comes to the name of Leonie.
Memories of meeting a French woman with bushy curls flood in. The way she smiled as she accepted the offer for coffee. Her pleasant shock as he presented her with a ring. The beautiful elegance of the dress that had exceeded his expectations. Completely missing her hints until she swore in her native language before slamming a positive test into his hands. Seeing her face light up as she dragged him towards their son so he could witness clumsy steps. Coming into the living room on Mother's Day, only to find two of them sleepily snuggling on the sofa with her while she was pregnant with the third.
Jack is delighted with this burst of recollection. It means it's working. They carry on with the list of male names. Hugo, Gunter, Patrik… even Reinhold. Nothing. No reaction from deep within himself is mustered. He's not Siegfried von Schneeplestein either.
Eventually, Heinrich is brought up. Heinrich. Yes, that sounded right. Yet not. But they were on the right path. Heinz? No, which is good because he doesn't want to share his name with a tinned food company. The 'rich' part certainly resonated with him. Rick, Richard? Well, even if he was a Rick, who wants to share his name with the man his wife was potentially seeing behind his back? No, it was a variant of Heinrich for sure.
After so many years of being taught to analyse, it seems to have backfired. He was thinking too much into this. Just drop the 'i' and switch the 'ch' with a 'k'. Henrik, his name was Henrik. Of course it was. How on earth could he have forgotten that?
In response to Henrik revealing this to Jack, his soon-to-be friend bursts into a grin and offers his hand. As they shake hands, Jack declares it is nice to meet him. This was the second successful breakthrough for them. Both he and his wife had more solid identities. Now all that was left were his children.
He later checks the same website Jack had used. From there, he can scan names and possibly ease the confusion. He feels like German names were the best starting point. He'd check out French names if he still had an identity missing. Things soon slot into place.
First, there was Elias. He was nine now. An avid reader, he had an inexplicable interest for birds. He was in his element whenever he was exploring the great outdoors. Oh yes, that had certainly caused issues when he was younger and still yet to grasp the concept of not bringing nature inside with him.
After him came Heidi, his five year old sister. It would seem she was beginning to show signs of a budding artist. He remembers the birthday where crayons were treated as if they were lottery winnings. In the sense it was a life changing possession. It wasn't long before that pack had been eroded by paper.
And little Alina, the youngest at four years old. She was somehow was in possession of as much energy as the sun could produce. If she wasn't playing tag with her siblings, she was rifling through a dress up box or singing as loudly as she was able. Then there was her habit of tugging desperately at the hand holding hers in order to race across the street and greet the dog she'd spotted.
Now that they are becoming closer, Jack asks for a favour. He understands Henrik is a busy man, what with being a doctor and all, but if he could spare a few minutes to check on a friend, Jack would greatly appreciate it. They've never had a medical professional they could send this ego to. Sure, Henrik nods, he'll do his best to fit him in.
Angus astounds him. Nothing really seems to fit a diagnosis. While his symptoms may partially match certain ailments, there were always other symptoms related to those conditions that disproved Angus was suffering from said condition. His initial hypothesis had been chronic fatigue syndrome when he'd first heard about the daily lack of energy. However, symptoms of CFS included enlarged lymph nodes (Angus' were fine), joint pain without swelling (no such pain, swelling or not) and headaches (nope). He wasn't about to force a diagnosis on someone whose symptoms half fit. Angus was a medical enigma. Angus' condition was simply Angus' condition, it seemed. Henrik hates to disappoint Jack, as well as the others, but nothing particularly made sense.
October proceeds fairly calmly. There are patients to care for at work and children to keep an eye on at home. On top of all that, Jackie and Marvin's burgeoning friendship caused them to train together. With Marvin's developing magic and Jackie's newfound superpowers, those training sessions added up to a few safety risks. Henrik supervised them in case of injuries whenever he had the time.
Most of October is calm. It kind of falls at the last hurdle.
Marvin pounds at his front door minutes after he returns from trick-or-treating. He is immediately rushed to the egos' home. Marvin hasn't been communicating the issue clearly. That is why he is shocked to learn of what had happened that evening. Jack had been recording a video where he carved a pumpkin. Simple enough. Until he slit his own throat.
Okay, he had this. It was just a simple case of reconnecting any blood vessels and muscles needed before suturing the wound. Saving a man who had already bled out was so simple. So easy. At least it was only Jack's veins that were damaged. Internal jugular and interior thyroid, if he's not mistaken. Henrik works diligently. If anything, Jack deserves to be fixed before they-
No, he is not losing another one. He'll pull a miracle out of his ass if he has to.
Somehow, he does. Jack stabilises. He appears to recover faster than expected. Henrik can relax slightly and stop stressing about his friend's health. He would much rather focus on mundane things like whether Heidi would prefer her birthday cake to look like a hedgehog or caterpillar. If Henrik can put this whole ordeal behind him, that would be great.
The situation complicates. He is home when Sean visits Jack, triggering an argument between the two. This in turn seems to have caused Jackie to wander off in an attempt to get away from it. And now the sixteen year old boy was missing. He can alert the police if they want. Otherwise, he's not sure how much help he can be. However, if they did find Jackie, please don't hesitate to tell him. He would need to check if he suffered any injuries while outside the safety of their home.
The day marking 10 years since he married Leonie came around. He gets paged, meaning their celebratory meal out will have to be cancelled. Yes, he knows they've been planning this for months. 10 years, yep, there's no need to remind him. What did she expect him to do, not go to-? Oh, there she goes pulling the work card. She had a degree so why was he to blame for her not putting it to good use? It wasn't like he told her to go into a unpredictable field like interpreting. Maybe they would be happier if weren't living together? Ha! If they separated, she'd struggle to support herself and three children. They both knew that. Whatever, he had to go. Happy anniversary.
He finds some reprieve in early December. A child's excitement to find St Nicholas has left chocolate coins in their shoes will never get old. Another added benefit to St Nicholas' Day is how diligently the girls clean their rooms in preparation. Elias is beginning to get to an age where the existence of Santa is being doubted. Nevertheless, he goes along with the tradition with as much anticipation as his sisters. It also causes him to take lead of the cleaning campaign which, again, saves Henrik or Leonie from further encouragement to get the house ready for the nightly visitor.
Marvin brings home a cat in February. On a day where Leonie's schedule is packed but his is not, he takes the children to visit his friends. At times he has to encourage them to be gentle and approach Bastet carefully. She was a former stray after all and not entirely used to having a permanent home. Either way, the three of them adore the new addition. And Henrik himself had to admit she was a pretty girl.
Things change in April when a young man arrives on his table. The patient had been brought in after sustaining a gun shot wound to the head, an apparent suicide attempt. The surgery is long and tough. There had to be a great deal of delicate precision to ensure minimal damage. Yet, in the end, it proves successful. He couldn't be more relieved.
Henrik checks up on the patient after he regains consciousness. It doesn't escape his notice that Mr Brody bares resemblance to him and the rest of the egos. While conversing with him, he learns Brody has nowhere to go once he's released. Henrik leaves him an address which may help him. Breaking as little patient confidentiality as he can, he lets Jack know a visitor may arrive in the near future.
It's surprises Brody when Henrik sees to him in his private clinic. Well, what can Henrik say? He's somewhat of the egos' personal doctor. Chase is a part of the group as much as the rest of them. Hence, Henrik was now in charge of overseeing Chase's wellbeing as well.
The left arm worries him. While the rest of the brain seems unaffected by the incident, the site of the injury certainly wasn't left unscathed. With part of his premotor cortex damaged, it would appear the function in his left arm had become impaired. Physical therapy is recommended.
The two men speak more often with the conversations turning less formal. He discovers the two of them have some things in common. They were both fathers with daughters the same age. In fact, Alina tells him all about her new friend Willow who'd recently joined her year group. Chase was going through a divorce and Henrik can certainly relate to being part of an imperfect marriage. They'd even become fathers and husbands at similar ages.
Henrik's really starting to like Chase. He doesn't approve of the way he conducts himself at times but he's generally a good guy. He would say he's someone to grab a beer with. However, Chase's forming issues with alcohol were not something Henrik wished to endorse.
Jack approaches him in June. Oh, he's returned to learning to German while the rest of the house slept? Jack didn't have to do that for him. Honestly, he is flattered. No, not flattered. Something stronger than flattered like... like moved. Jack secretly putting the effort in to surprise him had been moving. Still, there is some more practice required in terms of becoming fluent in the language. He and Jack aid each other in improving their linguistic skills in the others' native tongue.
Jacques' arrival allows Henrik to strengthen his multilingualism even more. Now he could converse with Jack in German and Jacques in French. Everyone else, of course, spoke English around him, whether at work or in public. He wasn't complaining. Henrik did live in an English speaking country, after all. Once the artist settled in a little, perhaps he should invite him for dinner. Leonie would probably enjoy having someone else who was native to her own home country.
He's quietly working in his own lab when Jack stumbles through the door. His friend barely gets a syllable out before gagging. Immediately, Henrik begins gathering observational evidence in an effort to diagnose. Gagging, especially when pairing with covering the mouth, indicated nausea. So that's already one symptom he can work with.
Yes, he can work this out. He can help. For Jack, for his dear friend.
He can't work it out. None of the symptoms seem to tell him anything. Deep vein thrombosis, blood clots and pulmonary embolism shared a connection. Chronic stress and nervous breakdown were closely linked to each other. The same went for Parkinson's disease and Dementia. But all of them together? No! It made no sense.
What made it more difficult was the knowledge of Anti's presence. He lurks in the shadows. It began with his eye being itchy. Henrik hates the supposedly random sensation of pin and needles across his body. He keeps having lapses in attention. They likely only last a second but he can't afford to lose the time. Especially with it feeling warmer than it should in here. His arm plays up but he blames it on mood swings.
He changes tactics, treating Jack as if he were in an emergency room. The momentary losses in focus occur more frequently now. But he won't give up. He almost lost Jack before, he refuses to lose him again. Even as his system begin to fail. No no no. Once one goes down, they all go down. He has to succeed. The buzz of staticky air grows. The demon is circling closer but he's not completely here yet. Henrik still has a chance.
That is the hope, at least. It doesn't fully register when he giggles over the soon-to-be corpse. Over the patient. Over Jack. He is weak as he begs like the sad little puppet he is. No, he needs to buy himself more time. Where are the A̸͟ń͜t̡͞į-depressants? Antidepressants. He needs to depress Anti somehow. And why the hell was he wrapping a cord around his throat? He should n't try that again. He needs to find the an͠ti̡͘̕c̷͝ǫ͏͢a͡gu͡l҉á͡n̷ts̵. Anticoagulants. Stop it. Please.
No.
Nothing he does is helping. In the distance, he is given the privilege of hearing the magical assault on the door. Yes, please, for the love of god, help him. Help Jack too. ...Jack? No! No, Jack was his friend. He can't be dead. Open the door already. Come in and help save Jack. Come in and see the Bad Doctor who failed all his friends. But you'd better hurry up. The patient has no pulse and the doctor...
Well, the doctor has places to be.
Henrik's head spins upon being released. He thinks he cries that first night. Not because he's found himself with Anti indefinitely. Henrik has far more than a few choice words he'd like to direct to that demon. It's not that.
It's the thought of his family, his friends, all those he loved. The egos will know what happened. They know full well he's with Anti now. Who else could have kidnapped him in a haze of static? But somebody's going to have to tell Leonie he's not coming home. And, in turn, she's going to have to tell the children. Henrik can't imagine how horrible that will be. Oh, and it's August, isn't it? No, no, no. Alina's birthday is just around the corner. He was going to head into town and buy her that cuddly tiger she kept going on about recently. He'd been so looking forward to seeing her face light up as she tore the paper and realised what it was.
And now he- now he wasn't going to. Now he wouldn't see his loved ones for a long time. If ever. Please don't let it come to that.
Anti has only ever had one known prisoner before. Said prisoner was taken 9 months ago. Well, at least Henrik knows he'll probably be here for a minimum of 9 months. He wonders if Jackie is still here. He hopes not. God forbid that boy is still suffering by Anti's hand.
The most prominent way Anti welcomes him to imprisonment is confiscating his glasses. "Well, you won't need them.", he states. Hence why they were promptly destroyed into deformed plastic and glass shards. He tries not to fret about it. He's left in the darkness more often than not.
Time blurs. The light is off. The light is on. Anti is there. Anti is somewhere else. He's aware of how long a human can typically go without food and water. So, it would seem, does his captor.
When he least expects it, a figure stands in the hallway. The lights are flicked on to reveal an ego. As Henrik's eyes adjust, he takes in more of the visitor's details. Unhealthily thin, grinning in an unnatural manner and holding a hand firmly against his stomach. He is too young to be past his teen years. Without a doubt, this is Jackie.
"Happy birthday, doctor. I thought it would be fun to redeem yourself. You do want to redeem yourself, don't you? You couldn't save Jack. Maybe you can save this one."
A beat hasn't passed when the hand evacuated its present position, exposing the damage done. The inner contents are left subject to gravity. Anti laughs at Henrik's horror. With Anti relinquishing control, the emptied body returns to the state of a cadaver. Jackie just collapses on the spot. Henrik has no choice but to get to work immediately.
During the procedure, Anti periodically uses Jackie as a receptacle. He giggles and taunts him as soon as the doctor is able to focus on what he is doing. Henrik struggles to ignore him. Tears threaten occasionally. He blinks them away. He has no time for them.
He has a patient in front of him. He has to focus on that. Allowing his thoughts to stray from that will distract him too much. He can't spend a single second reflecting on how the patient may have gotten into this condition. He desperately hopes Jackie was dead before the first incision was made. It would too sickening to imagine enduring that while awake. Probably without anything to reduce the pain.
But no, this is a cadaver. It may have been Jackie once. Not anymore. All he can do is restore the body to a more respectful condition. If he ever sees the others again, he doesn't know how he will be able to answer their questions about Jackie. God knows what Anti will do to the body after he is done operating.
If Anti was in a solid form right now, Henrik might turn his instruments on him.
Still, he eventually succeeds in replacing the organs. The heart does not beat. Nor do the lungs expand with breath. At least Jackie is whole again. Given the chance, Henrik would provide him with a respectful burial. Knowing Anti, he will likely discard the body with as much consideration as he would a crisp packet. Alone once more, Henrik is helpless to prevent the tide.
The only blessing is Anti taking his frustrations out on him soon after. Apparently, Jackie had escaped. Henrik cannot conceive of a way someone who was dead yesterday could achieve that feat. Either way, the miracle gives him hope. He smiles to himself once his captor leaves him. If he is the single target of the glitch's aggression, he'll happily fulfil that role. So long as it keeps him from hunting for fresh blood. Especially Jackie. That boy has suffered enough. He deserves to keep his freedom.
Anti comes to his room with a syringe. He claims he is only looking out for Henrik's immune system. Bullshit. If he really cared, he'd provide, at the very least, a decent diet. God knows what the syringe contained. Henrik isn't even sure how much managed to get through in the end. It was a flurry of limbs before the needle inevitably found its way to his arm.
It is practically forgotten about by the time he has reason to remember. With the weariness and fever, he's convinced it's the flu. Lights irritate him now too. However, once the rash appears, he knows it's not so simple. He updates his diagnosis. Measles. Why on earth did Anti feel compelled to infect him with that disease? To prove he can? Well, congratulations, he's sick. He hopes Anti is proud of his achievement.
Anti delivers a patient for him to work on. It is likely someone off the street. And despite Henrik's own poor health, he was expected to operate on them. An experiment, Anti says. Henrik's life's work was based on science. Well, who said Anti couldn't conduct some science of his own?
Every now and again, Anti would bring some poor soul to 'repair'. Almost always it would be Anti who had caused the damage. It would also be during the times the doctor had artificially been made sick. He thinks Anti revelled in watching him struggle to fight his own symptoms to be professional. Not to mention the possible hope he'd unintentionally cause infected wounds. Anti loved to 'ensure it wouldn't happen again'. Like the demon cared about those people's health. He simply wanted an excuse to physically punish him for misdemeanours.
Another time, he burns as he shivers. His muscles wish to give up on him due to the pain and fatigue. He is unable to pin a specific diagnosis. He knows better than to wonder if it is influenza. Anti wouldn't bother with something so trivial. Henrik is unsure what his current illness is until mosquitos are mentioned. Oh, okay. So it's like that, huh. He suffers several repercussions thanks to the malaria. Surprisingly, being severely ill takes a lot out of you.
Trust Anti to bastardize Christmas. With December approaching, it is once again time for Saint Nicholas to pay his children a visit. Anti promises to leave them his own type of gift. Henrik is half aware as he trespasses on his own property.
In the living room, he is caught while leaving his message. The second Henrik recognises Alina, his heart yearns to have control long enough to touch her. What he would give to cuddle her and promise he'll be home again, as himself, one day. Hopefully soon. However, that was impossible with Anti's presence. The demon delights in her discovery. He dirties her shoes to encourage tears. She is too enthralled by the sight of her Papa to react the way he wants.
Despite not having horns, Anti claims to be Krampus. Their family didn't even incorporate that figure into their celebrations. Henrik could never recall which companion St Nicholas travelled with when he was younger so their home did without the extension of the tradition. He and Leonie usually just based how much chocolate they gave the children on how much effort they put into the preparations. If you're going to ruin the holiday for the fun of it, at least show the culture enough respect to ruin it properly.
Anti feels the height of winter is the perfect time to conduct another test. He abandons Henrik in the room naturally closest to freezing. His shivers gradually shift to confusion and reduced motor skills. He has a delayed reaction to his captor approaching. He claims to be here to warm him, directing to a bath. There is a high probability that the water is a decent temperature by regular standards. That does not stop him from having to silence himself and not cry out. He attempts to avoid the water. His lack of control when it came to his limbs causes him to struggle with that. The process is repeated with varying alterations to the conditions. Anti is happy when he observes him remove his shirt without full awareness of the consequences. Also, was it him or was the water getting more scalding with every trip?
Anti unexpectedly drags him to his feet one day. He's being taken somewhere. Where, he has no clue. Anti wouldn't tell him and he's aware it's best if he doesn't ask questions. In front of a house, he is dumped to the ground. The one who has made his life a misery for the past several months shrugs.
"I've got a better deal. Why would I waste my time you anymore?"
With that, Anti leaves, granting Henrik the chance to get a better look at the house he's been abandoned outside of. Wasn't this the egos' home? Yes, it was! This was his last known location before being kidnapped. Through that door were all his friends. Some 10 minutes walk from here was his family. He'll be able to see them all again.
He's... free.
At least, he hopes he is. This could all be some cruel trick. However, he'll fall for it if there is even a chance of briefly see his loved ones.
A man in a blue vest answers the door. Looks like Sean has been creating again. Marvin and Chase both startle at the sight of him. They are eager to assure him they tried to save him back in August. He's aware and thanks them for their efforts. Jackie instead descends into hysterics. It's understandable. The last time they'd seen each other, Jackie had been dead. When things calm down a little, he is introduced to Robbie, Shawn and Jameson.
He learns of Dr Jacksepticeye's existence but honestly, that is the least of his concerns. He needs to see how Jack is doing. He's seen plenty of people unconscious in hospital beds. This is different. This is a friend. When Henrik asks how the others have been caring for him, they explain they've been doing their best to keep him stable. That had been where Dr Jacksepticeye came in. He learns it is early May, meaning he's been gone for 9 dreadful months.
Chase offers to go with him as he returns home. It's comforting to have a familiar presence accompanying him. Chase won't say much about Elias or his sisters. 'They can tell you in person', he assures the father who can't get home fast enough. Once the two of them reach the house, the most Chase does is ring the doorbell. When Leonie answers, the younger man smiles.
"Guess who I found."
Leonie can't hug Henrik hard enough. He can't muster the courage to loosen his hold on her either. Even if the force she's exerting isn't gentle, he's grateful he's simply able to have her arms around him in the first place. She tells him to wait for her to pick their children up from school. Before she sets out from the door, she hands him a top and tracksuit bottoms. It's what he wore when he'd had an impossibly long shift. It's normality. Moreover, it's not the scrubs he's been stuck with for nine months.
Elias hangs back, refusing to believe it. Leonie makes an unnecessary comment about Henrik returning in time for their son's birthday. Oh yes, he deliberately came home for Elias' birthday. The one furthest from August. Did she think he wanted to miss either of Heidi or Alina's birthdays? Still, he went missing shortly before one birthday and returned shortly before another's. That was something. His son eventually is released from his stupor when he sees his sisters embracing their father.
Heidi is unsure how to react either. She approaches him slowly, as if she's unsure he's truly there. Alina racing past her encourages her to trust reality. It's a good thing he has two arms.
Alina doesn't waste a second gawping. She sprints at full speed in her school uniform. The entire weekend is spent being dragged away to read. She's five now. She's able to read simple sentences. He'd been looking forward to reading books with her, the same as he had with her siblings, but this... this was so much more special than he could have imagined it would be a year ago.
Ten days following his return, he stands in the kitchen of the egos' home. He sips coffee as he watches the others go about their day. He's been monitoring Marvin after a visit to his Grandmom resulted in stomach issues. Chase heads out the door, off to bring his children home for the weekend.
It's only later that they realise they never should have let the vlogging father leave.
#jacksepticeye#jacksepticeye egos#henrik von schneeplestein#creator au#my writing#writersofjack#tw gore#tw kidnapping#tw illness#tw death mention#tw medical procedures#okay the captivity part is pretty weak#you can tell I used all my good ideas for Jackie's captivity#that said I am quite proud of how the KJSE bit came out#so yeah... I tried
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yooo pls give me headcanons on five being an even younger child. unless you're saving them for fics ofc!!
Actual little kid Five or from the one fic idea I have where Five ends up being even younger than 13?? Regardless, I have a lot of thoughts so I’ll do both!
under the cut bc I can already tell this is gon get long
Actual baby Five -
I already mentioned my headcanon that as a little kid when his powers were just manifesting, his powers sort of? Acted up just a little? Like he’d get little blue sparks playing across his hands constantly but without actually jumping. And, since touching the fabric of the universe is a bit tingly, Five would just chew on his hands to make the itchy feeling go away.
Someone suggested mittens like the ones you give kids with chicken pox and I just about died so that’s 100% being added to my headcanons as well. And Five HATES those mittens with a passion and would have yelly screaming fits about them and just bash his mittened hands against the floor in outrage. Absolutely terrible.
Five could absolutely not control his powers at first. So he would just. Jump somewhere accidentally. Sometimes it was a kind of wishful thinking type thing like “hmm if i get up on the counter i can reach the cookie jar” and BAM suddenly Five is up on the counter. Other times it was more just “guess i’m gonna fall through the fabric of the universe and end up wherever lmao” and basically what I’m getting at is he gave everyone multiple heart attacks literally all the time
Sneezes. When Five sneezes he jumps by accident. Just ACHOO and a flash of blue light and he’s gone. Bye bye bitch. It’s involuntary and a nightmare when he gets sick.
Five was that little kid who LOVED to draw. Like he would just sit for hours with a crayon clenched in his chubby little baby fist drawing scribble monsters. Of course after a Certain Incident that included drawing on the walls Reginald Hargreeves banned drawing because it’s ‘childish’ or whatever. There’s a part of me that wants to say that after everything he picks up drawing again as something to occupy his hands that isn’t obsessively working and reworking equations
I’m going to go ahead and assign my own childhood bullshit to Five because why not so I headcanon that Five as a small child would DEMAND to be read to. At all hours. I’m talking literally attempting to pry the nannies eyes open and demanding that they ‘wead to [him]’ in the middle of the night. Most of the time he didn’t even actually care about being read to he just liked hearing someone talk so he was just as content just sitting with them while they chatted to someone else tbh (how did my parents not assassinate me as a kid smh)
and now i’m even sadder about him being alone in the apocalypse thanks
Would hide when he was upset. Also very good at hide and seek. Look this is a big ass house and Five can literally teleport out of a room and out from under watchful eyes I’m saying that he must have been the most stressful child in existence to watch over holy shit but yeah when upset crawls into some small space and hunkers down until he’s less upset. Start checking the cabinets you fools. Can and WILL fit into spots you think are too small for him to fit in. If there’s a larger space behind even he shouldn’t be able to squeeze in, he can jump in so don’t discount those as hiding places as well.
Cheated at tag. Cheated at tag so much. They literally have a special version of tag called ‘five tag’ designed specifically to handicap him because even when they ban using powers he still ends up being way too fucking good at tag like holy shit
okay this isn’t even much of a Five one but as little kids before Reggie decided to go on his “Vanya sucks” crusade they would team up against one another and Klaus was caught in the middle bc he was number four. Luther, Allison, and Diego would squad up (back before Luther and Diego were at each others throats I actually headcanon they were close before powers became a thing) and declare war on Five, Ben, and Vanya and then it became a game of trying to tempt Klaus onto a certain team. Klaus usually went with Five-Ben-Vanya but there were occasions that he was 100% a turncoat. Trust me I had an odd number of siblings this would have been a thing.
honestly though these nannies were dealing with seven kids under the age of four like god damn i have so much respect for them. That nursery must have been a fucking battle zone. There are no sides there is only survival. and these kids have SUPERPOWERS. Hell is empty and all the devils are looking at them with innocent eyes like the entire room isn’t completely trashed behind them. Where’s Five, kids? Where the fuck is your teleporting brother? Six put those tentacles away so help me god you will go straight into time out, do not pass go, do not collect two hundred. NUMBER ONE if you don’t put down that cabinet RIGHT NOW -
Now i’m thinking about the first time Reginald dealt with one of the kids having a screaming meltdown in front of him. I feel like it would have gone very badly for the kid in question :(
and now for not quite a baby!Five
Extremely salty. Furious that he’s so small. Will stab you in the knees to make you get down to his level if you dare condescend to him. Probably stands on counters or tables when talking to his siblings, but has on at least one occasion hit his limit on jumps and been unable to get down without asking for help. Decides that he lives on the kitchen counter now because fuck that noise
Would rather die than be carried anywhere but if he’s the one to climb on someone then it’s okay. Prefers sitting on shoulders because a) taller, and b) they don’t have to hold him up and he can pretend that it’s entirely his decision
A sleepy bitch. Overuses his powers frequently getting to places he can’t easily reach anymore. Sleepy and grumpy. Doesn’t give two shits where he falls asleep and will sleep sprawled out across the floor, had been stepped on or had someone trip over him before and yet still refuses to stop. Honestly it’s a bit of a roulette whether he’ll wake up if they try to put him somewhere else, with just as much danger implied. Klaus produces traffic cones from god knows where and gleefully surrounds Five when he finds in which… is as good a solution as any tbh
His powers are still like,, almost on the fritz? Like when he was a little kid he couldn’t control them. He can now, but also they glitch out occasionally and his hands are all itchy again because they keep pushing at the boundary of the universe without him even thinking about it and it’s the most irritating thing in the world
His pain tolerance is back to being shit which he doesn’t appreciate. However everyone else freaks out way more than him when he accidentally slices his hand open trying to steal one of Diego’s knives, which was pretty funny
Claire comes over and immediately teams up with Five. No one saw it coming and everyone regrets it except for the tiny duo.
She asks him why he’s a kid if he’s her Uncle Five and he gives her the whole story about him growing old in the apocalypse and coming back etc. etc. and that he’s actually a grown up and he doesn’t think she’s going to understand but Claire just says “Oh, like Narnia?” and Five is like “EXACTLY LIKE NARNIA” and she is automatically his favorite
Claire literally tells Five point blank that he’s wasting his potential. How does Five not know all the tricks to being a brat and getting what you want? Puppy dog eyes first and progress into tantrums my friend. Look, Claire is Allison’s daughter and Allison was manipulative as fuck as a child and Claire has inherited at least some of that
Five’s eyes are fucking OPENED and everyone wishes they would be closed again. Five’s puppy eyes are surprisingly and devastatingly effective, especially when he tears up and lets his little lip wobble. Claire is so fucking proud of her protege
Claire rules the house with her tiny iron fist and Five readily follows her lead. Look, he never wanted to be the leader okay he was content to leave that to Luther and he’s equally happy now to leave it to Claire
The first time Patrick came to pick Claire up Five kicked him in the shins and ran off and Patrick was just very very confused about why Allison’s nephew (cover story, Klaus probably gets to pretend to be his dad again or something) has decided to hate him
Five still hides when he’s upset and now he’s tiny literally no one can find him. The first time it happens everyone freaks out and searches the entire house and after a few hours Grace just pops off and retrieves a now sleeping Five from like, the top shelf in the linen closet or something idk
On at least one occasion has had to be stopped from eating some kind of insect or spider off the floor. It’s like owning a cat or something. For the most part they hate it but one of them (Klaus) has 100% pointed out one to Five like “GET IT” but honestly this could be a headcanon for any age Five
#ask#anonymous#tua#the umbrella academy#five hargreeves#number five#klaus hargreeves#luther hargreeves#diego hargreeves#allison hargreeves#ben hargreeves#vanya hargreeves#grace hargreeves#the nannies#claire hargreeves#my rambles
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this is disgustingly shippy and I can’t even blame a prompt for it, but I can and will blame the shippy headcanons @the-majestic-cheese-turtle and I have been coming up with for the past few days.
Ugh.
Here, have a cavity.
(featuring: a human version of the-majestic-cheese-turtle’s OC Ambrose--don’t ask, there’s actually a good reason for it, honest--and my OC Trish.)
Training Ring
Ambrose hit the training mat with a loud thud, then coughed slightly in an attempt to return oxygen to his lungs.
This, he thought with a quiet groan, was not going at all how he’d planned.
His spectacular view of the overhead lights was obscured by Trish leaning over him, the smile on her face tinged with a hint of concern.
“You okay down there?”
“That,” he said, raising an accusing finger, “was not at all what you were supposed to do.”
She laughed, the concern fading from her face. “Worked, didn’t it?”
“Well, yeah, but I’m—” he groaned again, flopping one arm over his eyes. “What if it was a bigger, more muscly guy? Definitely wouldn’t work.”
Trish shrugged. “You’re the one who said I should train with you instead of Tony or Dmitri.”
Ugh. Ambrose’s mind flitted back to his two burly security guards. It had been very sweet of them to offer Trish self-defense lessons, and he trusted both of them with his life—well, obviously—but more than that, they were just… good people.
But when he’d watched those first lessons, watched her red-faced and laughing at her own failures, seen how certain moves required them to press up against each other…
He didn’t think he was the jealous type, but—he was, apparently. Incredibly, childishly jealous.
You could add “overprotective” to that list, too. According to Trish, anyway.
“Death threats aren’t a joke, Trish!” he’d exclaimed in frustration. Especially not when they’re my fault, he thought. Because word has gotten out that you’re my girlfriend. When I’M the one responsible for putting you in danger.
“Come on,” she’d laughed, dangling the paper from her fingertips. “This looks like it was written in crayon. They’re probably, like, twelve. Besides,” she’d said, leaning forward as if to share a secret, “I’ve worked in customer service. It’ll take way more than this to scare me.”
“Would you please take this seriously?” he implored.
“Do you take yours seriously?” she challenged.
“Well... no. But at least I have guards! You won’t let me hire any for you!”
“Of course not! Look, I—” she sighed, pinching her brow. “It’s just not necessary, okay? You’re being very sweet, but I think you’re overreacting.”
Now it was his turn to sigh. “Would you at least let Tony and Dmitri give you some self-defense lessons?”
She rolled her eyes. “Fine.” She punched him lightly in the arm. “But only so I know the best way to punch you the next time you get all overprotective.”
It may not have been the most satisfying of victories, but for her safety, he’d take it.
He always would.
“Hey,” Trish’s voice broke into his thoughts as she leaned down to pick up a box that had skittered a short distance away when he’d hit the mat. “What’s this?”
Oh, no. His heart shot into his mouth, and his hand clapped suddenly to his now very empty pocket. No no no no no—
“Nothing.” he responded in a strained voice.
“Because it looks an awful lot like a ring box.”
“Does it?” His voice was higher than it should have been. “Weird. Because it definitely isn’t.”
“Huh.” She traced a finger experimentally across the top of the box. “So if I opened this, I definitely wouldn’t find a ring in here.”
“Y-yes. Right.”
She stared at him for a moment as though debating, then suddenly opened the box. A soft inhale followed.
It was a ring, all right. A very pretty, very expensive ring. A ring that she was very much not supposed to have seen yet.
Trish shook her head to dispel the look of appreciative wonder that had washed over her face upon opening the box.
“I mean,” she said, gesturing toward the jewelry, “it looks an awful lot like a ring to me.”
“That’s—it’s—you’re not supposed to have that!”
“Really.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “just how many girlfriends do you have, lover boy?”
“No, that’s not it, it’s just—it’s—that’s mine,” he finished lamely.
“Yours.” She eyed the ring, tilting it from side to side so it refracted the light. “Y’know, you might be taking it a little far with the whole ‘sparkly’ thing. I don’t think this quite fits your aesthetic.”
Ambrose dipped his head and gave a short, frustrated sound. “That’s not what I mean! It’s mine, but it’s not—I mean—it’s yours.”
Trish went quiet.
“It’s yours,” he repeated quietly. “If you want it. Just like everything of mine. Just like me. Trish, I—” he stood, not taking his eyes off her, “I haven’t belonged to myself for a long time. A part of me has been yours since the moment I met you, and I want… I want you to keep it. Forever. If you want it too.”
His hands were on hers now, gently taking the box and removing the ring, then hesitating with it held between them. Her head was still down, face partially obscured by her loosened hair.
“Trish?” He had thought he knew the answer to this question before it was asked, but now, in this silence, doubt crept in and fueled his already racing heart. “Are you… I think this is the part where you’re supposed to give me some sort of answer?”
Finally, she raised her head, and—her incredible, shaky smile—her shining eyes—he knew. He knew everything he needed to know.
He felt like a sun had exploded in his chest.
“You haven’t actually asked a question yet.”
“I—” he laughed. “I guess I haven’t.” He took her left hand in both of his own, folding it between them, and stared into her eyes. “Trish… will you marry me?”
“Of course.” She laughed, and the sound of it was pure joy—like she was so filled with happiness that it had to spill out into sound or she’d burst. “Yes. Yes, of course!”
Somehow, his fumbling fingers managed to place the ring on her finger—but there was no chance to admire it before she had flung her arms around him an a rib-crushing hug, happy tears soaking into the shoulder of his shirt. He couldn’t do anything but hug her back and wonder if he was actually glowing from the nuclear reaction of happiness inside of him, or if it just felt like it.
“Took you long enough,” he heard Trish mumble into his chest, the sound muffled by his shirt.
“Took me…?” he repeated. Pieces slowly fell together in his joy-addled mind: how Trish, who still got flustered when he flirted with her in public, seemed so cool and collected throughout this whole event; how shortly after he’d gotten the ring a month ago, she hadn’t been able to look in his direction without glancing away and turning red as a beet…
He pulled back, almost accusing. “You knew!”
She nodded, smiling.
“How?”
“Please,” Trish snorted. “Tony hasn’t been able to look at me for a month without starting to cry, and Dmitri always has this dopey, happy look whenever I show up. And don’t think I missed them elbowing you every time we planned a date. Plus, there’s the fact that your pocket’s been oddly lumpy for the past two weeks. Honestly, babe, I love you--” his heart skipped a beat, still— “but you are the least subtle person I know.”
Ambrose laughed, putting his face in his palms.
“I can’t believe it. You knew.”
“Correct.”
“And instead of choosing to go along with it, you decided to spend one of the most important moments of our lives teasing me mercilessly.” He felt a flood of warmth and excitement as the words ‘our lives’ passed his lips, a feeling he saw reflected in Trish’s eyes—along with dancing amusement.
“Correct.”
“I assume this is indicative of how things will be in the future?”
“It is.”
He folded her back into his arms, resting is head on top of hers and feeling her shake with laughter. A smile spread over his face. There must have been a cosmic mistake somewhere—surely it wasn’t physically possible to feel this happy.
Well, if it was a cosmic mistake, he certainly wasn’t about to complain about it. He laughed, pressing a kiss into her hair.
“Good.”
He wouldn’t have it any other way.
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My Demons (Chapter 4)
Fandom: Naruto (Anime)
Genre: Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, FLUFF
Pairing: Gaara x OC
Rated: T
(First) (Previous)
I cannot stop this sickness taking over
It takes control and drags me into nowhere
I need your help, I can't fight this forever
…
I need a savior to heal my pain
When I become my worst enemy
The enemy
-My Demons - Starset
Gaara and Rin sat at the kitchen table as Yashamaru took a tray of cookies out of the oven.
“Let these cool, okay?” Yashamaru looked at the two who nodded. “Okay. I’ll be right back.” He said before he left the room. Rin hopped off her chair and Gaara frowned.
“Yashamaru said to wait.” he said.
“I’m not gunna take one.” Rin said. “I just wanna look at them.” Gaara continued to frown and hopped off his chair. Rin went on her toes and inhaled deeply. “I love cookies.”
“Me too.” Gaara said going on his toes so he could see them too. “Yashamaru makes the best.”
“I’m gunna make you cookies one day.” Gaara looked over at her as she smiled at him. “Well when I can use an oven.” She moved her hand slightly but just enough for it to touch the still burning hot tray. Rin let out a small scream and Gaara gasped.
Yashamaru heard Rin’s scream and dropped the basket of laundry he was carrying to run to the kitchen.
“What happened?” he gasped. Gaara looked over at him. The two were standing by the sink on a small stool, Gaara holding Rin’s hand under the water while her other hand wiped away some tears. Yashamaru frowned. “I told you two to wait.”
“We weren’t trying to take one; we were just looking.” Gaara said. Yashamaru sighed and opened a nearby cabinet to get a med-kit. Gaara turned off the water and let Yashamaru take care of Rin’s hand. As Yashamaru put the med-kit away the two moved back to the table. Gaara was frowning as he stared at Rin’s bandaged hand.
“Does it hurt?” Gaara asked as he lifted his head to look at her.
“A little.” Rin said quietly. “I’ll ask mom to kiss it better later.” she said. Yashamaru turned to them and smiled as he saw Gaara take Rin’s hand and kiss her bandage.
“Better?” Gaara asked. Rin’s cheeks were pink as she smiled at him.
“Mhm. Thanks Gaara.” Gaara smiled back.
Yashamaru walked into the kitchen the next morning to see Gaara at the table with a bunch of crumbled pieces of paper, that had been coloured with blue scribbles, all around him as he had his head down on the table.
“Gaara?” Yashamaru asked putting a hand on Gaara’s back. Gaara lifted his head with a frown. “What’s all this?” Yashamaru picked up a ball of paper.
“I saw a paper flower in the window of a shop. I wanted to make one for Rin.” He lowered his head again and his voice was muffled against the table. “But I can’t figure it out.” Yashamaru smiled.
“Would you like me to help you?” Gaara lifted his head as his eyes lit up.
“Yes please!” Yashamaru chuckled and nodded.
“Alright.” Yashamaru picked up a piece of not crumbled paper and Gaara grabbed the blue crayon that had only about an inch left. “I think I might have some blue paper somewhere.” Gaara grinned.
“Can I borrow some?”
“I’ll give you a few pieces.” Yashamaru said with a nod.
“Thanks Yashamaru!”
…
“Gaara!” Rin shouted while waving as Gaara walked up to her on the swing. “What took you so long?” She asked with a playful pout. Gaara bit his lip and held out a blue origami flower. Rin blinked and smiled. “Did you make this?” she asked. Gaara nodded.
“Yashamaru helped me.” he said quietly as she took it from his palm.
“It’s so pretty!” Rin squeaked before kissing his cheek. Gaara smiled as his cheeks went pink.
“It matches your hair.” he said. Rin giggled.
“Now I wanna make you one.”
“Yashamaru has coloured paper he let me use. I’m sure he’d let you use some.” Rin grinned and grabbed Gaara’s hand before running back towards the village excitedly. “Whoa!”
…
Gaara watched Yashamaru show Rin how to make the flower before giving her a piece of blue paper. Rin shook her head and cupped her hand around her mouth to whisper to him. Yashamaru smiled and Gaara tilted his head curiously as Yashamaru sifted through the colours of paper before pulling out a piece of red paper. Rin smiled and started to make the flower. It took a few attempts but she finally finished it and held it out to Gaara.
“It matches your hair.” She said with a smile. His cheeks went pink as he took it.
“Thanks.” he said quietly. He glanced at Rin shyly as she giggled.
“Tag you’re it!” Rin called before running away from the swings. Gaara hopped off his swing, leaving his bear and Rin’s cat to swing while he chased after her with a smile. There were a few other kids playing their own game. Rin looked back to see how far away Gaara was and before she could look back she tripped over her own two feet and hit the sand with a yelp. Gaara gasped and froze. Rin cradled her bleeding knee as tears came to her eyes. The other kids stopped playing their game when they heard Rin’s yelp.
“I think Gaara tripped her.” One of the kids whispered to the group.
“He’s so scary.” A girl whimpered. Gaara’s eyes widened and he shook his head.
"No! I-I didn't hurt her! I swear!" Gaara said. Rin frowned and stood up. The kids all looked at her. She gripped the bottom of her shirt and leaned on her good leg.
"Gaara would never hurt me! So… So shut up!" She shouted before sniffling and wiping her nose on her sleeve.
"Let's get outta here." The kids all ran away and Gaara watched them sadly before running to Rin.
"Are you okay?" he asked softly. Rin let herself fall back and held onto her leg as the tears started to flow freely. Gaara frowned. He helped her stand again and put one of her arms around his shoulders while he put one around hers.
…
When they found Yashamaru, in the kitchen, Rin had stopped crying and was walking better but the blood had trickled down her leg and started to dry making it look a lot worse than it was.
"What happened?" Yashamaru asked. He looked to Gaara who was frowning.
"We were playing and I tripped." Rin said. Yashamaru picked her up and sat her on the counter. Gaara stood next to her and took her hand. She smiled at him and he smile sadly back.
“You have to be more careful.” Yashamaru said to Rin. “You always seem to be getting hurt.” Rin frowned.
“I’m sorry.” she said. He finished cleaning and wrapping her knee and put everything away. When he turned back Rin was giggling as Gaara kissed her knee. He smiled up at her.
“Does it still hurt?” he asked.
“Nu-uh.” She hopped down off the counter and hugged him. “Thanks Gaara!” Gaara’s face went pink and he smiled as he hugged her back.
…
About ten minutes after the two left Yashamaru was cleaning up in the kitchen when he heard two sets of feet and sniffling. He turned to see Gaara and Rin, holding hands, Rin crying silently. She lowered her other hand from her eye and revealed with a scrape on her chin. Yashamaru sighed and took out the med-kit.
Gaara stood in front of a photo of his mother, trying to stab his hand with a knife.
“It doesn’t matter what I do. The sand just gets in the way.” Gaara said looking at the sand.
“Gaara.”
“Yashamaru!” Gaara gasped, turning to see his uncle in the doorway. Yashamaru walked over.
“As a member of the medical corps, our leader the lord Kazekage has asked that I see to your safety and well being personally. Please Gaara; it hurts me to see you do that.” Gaara looked down. “Although I suppose that the sand would protect you anyway.”
“Yashamaru?” Gaara asked.
“What’s the matter?” Yashamaru asked.
“What does pain feel like?”
“Hm?”
“You see, I’ve never actually been injured before and I was wondering what it was like. Rin gets hurt all the time. I want to know what she feels.”
“Hm. How can I put it? It’s… very difficult or maybe upsetting’s what I mean. It’s like, when someone is struck or cut it’s a feeling that’s very hard to take. When you’re hurt you don’t feel normal. I’m not explaining it very well. Basically it’s a situation you wanna avoid if at all possible.”
“Yashamaru?” Gaara asked.
“Yes?”
“Do you… do you not like me Yashamaru, like the others?” Gaara asked looking down.
“Everyone goes through their lives hurting others and being hurt, but it’s not so easy for us to hate one another.” Gaara’s face brightened and he smiled.
“Thanks a lot, Yashamaru.” Gaara said. “That helped, I think I kinda understand what pain is now.”
“I see.”
“I think I might be hurting too, just like everyone else. I’m always in pain.” He put a hand over his heart. “I know I’m not bleeding, but lately I’ve felt a lot of pain here.” He gripped his shirt. Yashamaru took the knife from Gaara and slit his own finger. Gaara gasped and his eyes widened.
“Wound your body and the blood will flow fast following the heels of pain, but as time passes the pain eventually fades away. With the help of medicine it can heal even faster, but even more dangerous is a wound dealt to the heart.” He put his other hand over his heart. “Cause there’s nothing that has more trouble healing.”
“A wound to the heart?” Gaara asked.
“Wounds to the heart are a little different from wounds of the flesh. Unlike an injury to the body there is no medicine for a wounded heart, and sometimes it never heals.” Gaara looked down and put his hand over his heart and gripped his shirt again. “But don’t worry, there is one thing that can mend a broken heart.” Gaara looked up with a gasp. “But it’s a very complicated remedy. It can only be administered to you by another person.” Yashamaru said looking at the picture of his sister.
“So then, what am I supposed to do?” Gaara asked. He noticed Yashamaru looking at the picture and turned to look as well.
“There’s one thing that can heal the heart. Only one.” He looked back at Gaara. “It’s love, Gaara.”
“Love?”
“You’ve got it.”
“But, but how am I supposed to get rid of it?” Gaara asked with wide eyes. “What is it I have to do to get rid of this pain?”
“Don’t you know, Gaara? It has already been given to you.”
“Huh?” Yashamaru looked at the picture again and Gaara turned his head as well.
“Love is the heart’s desire to serve someone precious to you to watch over them, to care for them. Like my sister did for you. There’s no question that my older sister always loved you. Sukaku the sand spirit is a living soul bent towards the purpose of war. The sand automatically rushes to protect you, just like the love of a mother. I believe your mother’s will’s carried in every grain of that sand. My sister, even after death, wants more than anything to protect you.” Gaara looked at Yashamaru.
“Yashamaru?” he asked. Yashamaru turned his head to look back at Gaara.
“Huh? What is it Gaara?”
“Thank you for all of your help. You know, for stopping me before.”
“You’re very welcome. After all, you’re special Gaara, I hold you very dear to me.” Yashamaru said with his finger in his mouth. Gaara walked forward and took Yashamaru’s hand. He held it for a moment before putting the bleeding finger in his mouth for a few second.
“It tastes like iron.” Gaara said as he lowered Yashamaru’s hand. Suddenly there was a knock at the door.
“That must be Rin for your sleep over.” Yashamaru said with a smile as he stood. Gaara’s face lit up.
“Yashamaru!” Yashamaru stopped and turned to Gaara. “W-Whenever I’m around Rin,” He put a hand over his heart again but didn’t grip his shirt. “The pain goes away. Is… Is that because of love too?” Yashamaru stared for a moment, his mouth open, then smiled.
“Let me ask you this: Whenever Rin’s hurt,” Gaara frowned.
“The pain comes back.” Gaara said softly. “I don’t like to see her hurting cause it makes me hurt.” He gripped his shirt. He suddenly gasped with wide eyes and looked up at Yashamaru. “Is that because of love? You said it’s the heart’s desire to serve someone precious to you to watch over them and care for them. Rin is… Rin is precious to me.” Gaara said with a small smile. Yashamaru watched him, his mouth slightly open. “I want to watch over her and protect her.” Yashamaru smiled.
“That’s love Gaara.”
(Next Chapter)
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Translation: Ouhi no Yakata/Château de la Reine
Hello. Thank you for reading my translation for Ouhi no Yakata/ Château de la Reine.
As this is (somehow miraculously?) before Tokyo run, hopefully this can help people who want to see it in Tokyo understand a bit more. Or help those waiting for the DVD to prepare to watch it when it releases.
This work comes with a few necessary notes beforehand. Please read them.
1. This is a fan-created translation. Please be aware that my understanding of Japanese is not extremely high-level, and there may be some errors. I did my best. If you find something you believe is incorrect, please feel free to message me and I will make an effort to correct it. (The only reason it even got this far was thanks to my savior and editor Carol.)
2. That being said, as this is a play with conversation, etc. I attempted to make this translation flow with natural and colloquial English/conversation tendencies rather than a word-by-word exact representation- while still keeping as much of the intended meaning(s) as possible.
3. If you wish to use this translation to make subtitles for your private/personal use, please let me know via a message/ask. I ask that you do not share subtitle files created from my translations without my consent at all.
4. Please do not take, repost, or recreate this translation on Tumblr or other websites without contacting me first.
5. This is a really specific translation note. There is a character in this play (Crayon) whos self-identification is not made clear. (To my knowledge, it is not made clear in the original novels either.) The only thing really clear is that… Crayon is somewhere on the queer scale.
Crayon is referred to many times in Japanese with the word “okama”. Strictly speaking, “okama” is a slur for gay people (generally targeting gay men or crossdressers, but has [incorrectly] been used recently for trans-people as well). It is often used in Japanese humor because ?? (enter reasons I neither know nor truly understand). (However, it is also sometimes used as a “reclaimed” term. It all depends on situation and intention and interpretation.)
There are jokes in particular in this show that revolve around referring to this character as an ‘okama’. As a translator, it really isn’t my job to write a whole thing about what I think about this or why. I’m really only responsible for providing the material in a language that people can understand.
Therefore, because I didn’t want to end up editing the material to my personal ideas/tastes, and because I didn’t feel comfortable directly translating the word ‘okama’ into any English slang, I left those lines translated into English but still using the Japanese word ‘okama’ in them.
6. There is a lot of French in this show. I do not speak French. But a coworker who does speak French decided to inform me that the French they were seeing was incorrect. I have no comment on this, as I (again) do not speak French.
7. A specific note on the theme of ‘smile’ and ‘laugh’ in this show. The script simply uses the word “warau” which can be a bit interchangeable for those words. There were times where “smile” made more sense, and times where “laugh” made more sense. In the end, I decided to use both words, and at some points even used them together to get the meaning/point across.
Without further ado. Here is the actual translation:
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Château de la Reine
Main Cast:
Asaka Manato Kitashirakawa Ukyo A romance novelist writing a new novel starring Louis XIV
Misaki Rion Sakurai Reiko Female president of a small-time travel agency. Tour conductor responsible for the “Light” tour.
Makaze Suzuho Louis XIV King of France during the 17th Century. Former owner of the Château de la Reine.
Aizuki Hikaru Kanezawa Shichi Real estate king.
Itsuki Chihiro Iwanami Former teacher at an ‘evening’ high school. (TN: There are some special schools with classes in the evening for people who work during the day.)
Kotobuki Tsukasa Shimoda Koji Manager of an electrical parts factory.
Mikaze Maira Shimoda Fusako Shimoda’s wife.
Sumiki Sayato Kondo Makoto Policeman.
Sorahane Riku Crayon [Kuroiwa Gentaro] Scorned by a previous lover, on a ‘heartbreak trip’
Sakuragi Minato Togawa Mitsuo A tour conductor at a small time travel agency, subordinate of Sakurai. Responsible for the “Shadow” tour.
Reimi Urara Diana She once lived in the Château de la Reine. The woman Louis XIV loved.
Hoshikaze Madoka Michiru Former hostess, and Kanezawa’s lover.
ETC Cast:
Iwanami Masae Kanon Mai
Mr. Tanno Rinjou Kira
Mrs. Tanno Ayaka Mari
Munon Matsukaze
Hayami Ritsuko (Editor) Junya Chitose
Pierre Kazuki Sora
Monsieur Duran Mitsuki Haruka
Can-Can Singer Fuuma Kakeru
Accordion Singer Hoshibuki
Anne d’Autriche Seoto Risa
Marie Thérèse Aishiro Moa
Preface: Charles de Gaulle Airport (Arrival Lobby)
[Airport Background]
As announcements flow through the arrival lobby of the Charles de Gaulle Airport, the tour conductor Mr. Togawa, working for a down-on-its-luck travel agency known as “Pan World Tour Enterprise”, is eating at a bar with the irritated tour customers. Togawa is on the phone with his boss, Sakurai Reiko.
Togawa: (On the phone) Ms. Reiko, is this really going to work?? This plan…
Sakurai: (A voice over the speakers) Are you asking if it’s a ‘good’ thing? In this world, there is both ‘light’ and ‘shadow’… so isn’t it fair to say there’s a ‘front’ and ‘back’ side to business, too?
Togawa: You just keep saying that over and over!
Sakurai: (voice) Anyway, you have to keep the customers at the airport for another 30 minutes. You got it?
Mr. Tanno: Mr. Togawa, exactly when are we going to be able to leave the airport?
Togawa hides his cellphone.
Togawa: M… Mr. Tanno… I am terribly sorry, our car… seems to be stuck in a terrible traffic jam…
Mr. Iwanami: Even so, we’ve already been waiting here an hour.
Togawa: I am truly sorry Mr. Iwanami!!
Ms. Iwanami: Dear, can’t you see Mr. Togawa is very troubled by the situation?
As the Iwanamis talk, Togawa returns to his phone.
Togawa: (on the phone) Ms. Reiko, did you hear that? How am I supposed to make more excuses to the customers!?
Sakurai: (voice) Why don’t you think about that on your own? Well then, I’ll contact you again when I arrive at the hotel.
Ms. Sakurai hangs up the phone.
Togawa: Wait-! Ms. Reiko? Ms. Reiko?!
The tour customer Kondo Makoto approaches Togawa.
Kondo: Hey, you! What’s the meaning of this? Is this some sort of scam?!
Togawa: (shocked and panicking) Mr. Kondo! What ‘scam’ could you possibly be talking about?!
Kondo: I was told I was going to be in a men’s shared room. (Points at the flashily dressed Crayon.) So what the hell is this?
Togawa: Ah, that should be Mr. Kuroiwa Gentaro…
Crayon: Don’t use that name! I go by Crayon, like at my shop~!
Kondo: What’s a ‘crayon’? Whatever shop you work at, once I get home I’ll find it and shut it down!
Crayon: My shop isn’t some shabby establishment like what you’re thinking. What a hard-headed policeman~
Mr. Tanno: A police officer?
Togawa: Mr. Tanno, is something the matter?
Mr. Tanno: No, of course not…
The Tanno couple exchange a meaningful gaze. Meanwhile, Crayon is bothering Kondo.
Kondo: Stop it! Don’t blow in my ear!
Crayon: Omg~ so shy~! How cute! Tonight is going to be so~ much~ fun~! Teehee~
Crayon exits while giggling.
Kondo: Hey!... What do you mean ‘fun’?!
Kondo chases after Crayon.
Togawa: Wait… Where are you two going?!
Togawa chases the two offstage.
Mrs. Iwanami: Well well, we seem to be grouped with some interesting folk!
Mr. Iwanami: My goodness…
The Iwanamis also exit the stage, and the bridge leads to the next scene.
Scene 1A: The City of Paris
Visiting Paris on a research trip, the Japanese author Kitashirakawa appears, singing.
[C’est Paris! C’est la vie!]
Kitashirakawa: Oh Paris!
What illuminates this city?
I saw it in the night- the color of dreams.
Oh, Paris!
Only Paris can capture the hearts of writers
Like no other city!
I want you to show me
Like Ernest Hemmingway
Like Scott Fitzgerald
What they sought- the color of dreams!
C’est Paris!
Selfishly, in this city,
C’est Paris!
People can see unbelievable dreams.
I want you to show me
Like the philosophers of Montmartre
Like the lovers who speak of romance
Something I have never seen- the color of dreams!
C’est la vie!
In the city of nostalgic meetings
C’est la vie!
People can find the dreams they’ve lost!
The editor Hayami accompanying Kitashirakawa on his trip appears.
Hayami: Mr. Kitashirakawa! There you are. I thought you’d suddenly disappeared…
Kitashirakawa: Hayami! I told you I hate group activities, not to mention when I’m forced to be around such vulgar people my creative motivation is exponentially reduced!
Hayami: You’re the one who selfishly broke away from the tour. Ms. Reiko’s been looking for you, too!
Kitashirakawa: That nasty tour guide… it’s fine to leave her behind.
Hayami: Really? I found her quite likeable. She’s the president of the tour agency but still leads tours with such vitality… It’s like watching a younger version of myself.
Kitashirakawa: If that’s true, then she’s bound to become a spinster too.
Hayami: Oh ho ho, what a jokester! I’ve definitely not given up yet.
Following Kitashirakawa, the guide Sakurai and the members of the Light Tour appear breathing heavily.
Sakurai: Mr. Kitashirakawa!
Kitashirakawa: Here comes the shabby tour guide.
Sakurai: How many times do I have to explain to you that your selfish behavior is a problem for the other tour members?
Kanezawa: Bro, I was looking for you.
Kitashirakawa: Hayami, do something! If I’m around this loud, annoying riffraff much longer, my creative research will be ruined!
Hayami: I’m sorry, Ms. Reiko. He’s that kind of artist…
Sakurai: Listen, this is a tour trip, you know? Even if Mr. Kitashirakawa is a famous novelist, in order to properly take part in the tour, he needs to listen to my instructions.
Kitashirakawa: Hayami…
Mrs. Shimoda: Kitashirakawa? Do you mean the Kitashirakawa Ukyo?
Kanezawa: Huh? This guy really a famous novelist?
Hayami: Yes! Mr. Kitashirakawa’s “Beauty and Sadness of the Blue Danube” (Utsukushisa to Kanashimi no Aoki Donau) was his brilliant debut novel! It was followed by his work “The Country of Light Snow” (Sasameyuki Kuni) that won the Tanibata Award. He’s truly a rare genius!
(TN: These are jokes regarding real life famous novels “Utsukushisa to Kanashimi to” by Yasunari Kawabata and “Sasameyuki” by Jun'ichirō Tanizaki. Therefore, the (not real) Tanibata Award would be a reference to Tani(zaki) (Kawa)bata. Hahaha, good job zuka.)
Kanezawa: Sounds like a bunch of rip-off titles.
Michiru: Papa!
(TN: Michiru is referring to Kanezawa as ‘Papa’ as a lover’s pet name, rather than a father-figure. Probably due to the fact that it’s implied he is older than her. It doesn’t really hold the same connotation in English, but it’s a bit too obvious of a word to try to change to something else.)
Mr. Shimoda: Well then, have you come to Paris to write a new novel?
Kitashirakawa: I suppose.
Hayami: Mr. Kitashirakawa is working on a romance set in the court of King Louis XIV!
Michiru: Wow! What’s the title?
Kitashirakawa: Are you ready to hear its brilliance? The title is… (emphatically) “The Lily of Versailles!” (Versailles no Yuri)
Kanezawa: As I thought, just another rip-off.
Kitashirakawa: What did you say!?
Kanezawa: Geez, so grumpy! But you know, I feel like we’d get along bro. We’ve both got good taste in clothes and nice hairstyles…
Kitashirakawa: Don’t lump me in with the likes of you! (Messes up Kanezawa’s hair) My hair’s the real deal!
Kanezawa: Aaah!
Michiru: Papa!
Holding onto his wig, Kanezawa looks around in panic at everyone staring at him.
Sakurai: (amazed) Let’s end our friendly chats there. If we don’t hurry, we’ll be late to arrive at the hotel.
Scene 1B: Places des Vosges
The stage changes to the Places des Vosges.
Kitashirakawa: Hayami! This is exactly why I said I hate group tours!
Hayami: Well, sensei, I don’t think you ever actually said that…
Sakurai: Now everyone, once we go through the corridor from the Places des Vosges, the Château de la Reine is waiting for us.
All members go onto the ginkyo.
[Château de la Reine]
Hayami: This is it, sensei! The place that Balzac (Honoré de Balzac) and Stendhal (Marie-Henri Beyle) loved! We’re almost at the Château de la Reine!
Kitashirakawa: Aah, the legendary hotel that turned away even the great Ernest Hemingway!
Michiru: (To Kanezawa) We get to stay at such a fancy hotel…. It’s like a dream!
Sakurai: But it’s not a dream! At first glance, you can see it looks like the kind of hotel normal customers wouldn’t be able to stay at… For us to stay here on a tour like this, rather than calling it a dream… it’s more like a miracle!
Château de la Reine
And the Plaza Athénée
And the Crillon and the Ritz, It’s not your imagination
A place that tourists from all over the world desire to stay!
Kanezawa: What’s that mumbo jumbo even mean? Chartoo …. (he can’t pronounce it)
Kitashirakawa interrupts Sakurai before she can explain.
Kitashirakawa: The “Château de la Reine”! In Japanese it means “The Queen’s Château”. It was owned by the ruler of 17th century France, Louis XIV, but the true meaning behind the Château’s name is still a mystery…
Château de la Reine! Others: Château
King Louis XIV himself de
Designed the interior decoration la
And still untouched- Reine
The Royal Suite! Château
That made VIPs worldwide de
Revere the Sun King’s la
Legendary Hotel! Reine!
All: The Queen’s Château… Château de la Reine!
Scene 1C: Château de la Reine (Courtyard Entrance)
The set changes during the interlude, the corridor hangings rise to reveal the courtyard entrance of the Château de la Reine. The hotel employees appear one after another.
Employees: Bienvenue!
Welcome to the Château de la Reine!
Employees: Château de la Reine!
Mrs. Shimoda: A once in a lifetime luxury
Mr. Shimoda: One last souvenir from the world
Employees: Château de la Reine
Michiru: How gorgeous!
Kanezawa: It’s perfect for us!
Employees: Château de la Reine
Hayami: Being able to stay here…
Kitashirakawa: … is the miracle of a lifetime!
Employees: Château de la Reine
All: Château de la Reine
The tour members all move to enter the Hotel. In the courtyard, the ghosts of Louis XIV and his servant Munon appear.
Louis: Munon, what is this? Who are those noisy people?!
Munon: I believe some Japanese tourists who have come to experience Paris?
Louis: And so, they also come to my Château de la Reine?
Munon: I fear that the hotel management has worsened, and they do not bother to take such care in screening visitors as they used to…
Louis: They just run in and out of the building like monkeys!
The place where my soul resides-
The Château de la Reine
For over three hundred years
Continuing to search for my lost love Munon: Continuing to search
Those that dare to interrupt for the king’s lost love…
My quest to find my beloved
Will not be forgiven!
The stage turns to reveal the hotel lobby.
Employees: Upon our list of past accommodations
Are the names of many great people!
Employees (women): Mozart!
Employees (men): Einstein!
Employees: Grace Kelly and Chaplain
Like everyone throughout the world
Who desires to see the color of dreams
The legendary hotel
The Queen’s Château- Château de la Reine
Mr. Shimoda: Our lives can finally end here
Mrs. Shimoda: It suits our final days
Employees: Château de la Reine
Kanezawa: I’ll tell her my secret and then propose?
Michiru: I want to know everything about Papa!
Employees: Château de la Reine
Château de la Reine
Hayami: To create a new masterpiece!
Sakurai: To get our company out of this pinch!
Kitashirakawa: I can already feel something great will happen!
Employees: Bienvenue! Welcome to
Château de la Reine!
Moving along with the number, the stage has changed to the lobby of the hotel.
Scene 2: Château de la Reine (Lobby)
Continuing from the front of the Château de la Reine lobby…
Kitashirakawa: Très bien!! Its sense of style is even better than what I’d heard!
The hotel manager, Monsieur Duran, appears.
Duran: Bonsoir mesdames et messieurs! (To Kanezawa) Ça va?
(*TN: The script has the French as ‘madames’ and ‘monsieurs’ which I have been told are not the plural spelling. Take it as you prefer.)
Kanezawa: Who you callin’ a saba, huh?! (TN: Saba = mackerel fish)
Michiru: Papa! How embarrassing…
Sakurai: Everyone, this is the general manager of the hotel, Monsieur Duran.
Duran: We welcome you to the Château de la Reine! For those of you just arriving from the airport, we will have your baggage delivered to your rooms right away!
Kitashirakawa: It’s here!
Hayami: Sensei?
Kitashirakawa: It’s here, it’s here, it’s here---- IT’S HERE!
Hayami: Aaah- the angels of inspiration have already appeared!?
Sakurai: What on earth…
Hayami: This happens whenever he gets an idea! It’s as if something possesses him! He’s known as the exorcist of literature!
Kitashirakawa: Hayami! Quickly- I need a pen and paper!!
Hayami: Yes, here! (To Duran) Uhm… Je voudrais la clé… We are Kitashirakawa and Hayami. Quick, our room key!
Duran: Oui! (Offers the keys.) Here you are.
Hayami: (Takes the keys) Merci! (To the boy) Now, guide us to our room!
Boy: Oh! Par ici, s’il vous plaît …
Following the boy, Kitashirakawa and Hayami exit through the hotel corridor.
Sakurai: Wait, both of you- I haven’t explained yet-
Kanezawa: Hey missy, hurry up and give us our room too.
Sakurai: I understand… (To Duran) Well then, please assign Mr. Kanezawa and Mr. Shimoda their room keys as well.
Duran: Oui, madame.
Sakurai: Everyone, we will be departing for our dinner cruise in exactly thirty minutes. I respectfully request your punctuality in meeting here in the lobby.
The steward boys lead the visitors to their rooms through the corridor.
Sakurai: Well then, please enjoy your stay.
The guests pass Sakurai and Duran on their way out, and once they are out of sight Sakurai and the manager begin speaking.
Sakurai: Monsieur Duran, being able to complete this special tour is all thanks to you…
Duran: Pas de problème. I should be the one saying that. In this recession, we in management can only do so much in the face of such abrupt cancellations. I wonder what will happen now…
Sakurai: We’ll have to keep working earnestly, but before that there’s another matter to discuss…
Duran: Oui, Madame. If it’s about the double-booking…
Sakurai: Shhhhhh!!! (looking around) Anyway, about the baggage replacements… you’ll have to pay meticulous attention.
Duran: Leave it to us, Madame Reiko.
Duran exits the stage. Now alone, Sakurai takes out her cellphone. In a different area of the stage is Togawa, still waiting at the airport.
Sakurai: Hello?
Togawa: Ms. Reiko! Aren’t you running a little late!? I don’t know how much longer I can fend off the customers’ complaints!
Sakurai: Well, that just can’t be helped. My “Light Tour” is a 7-night-8-day package at 1,500,000 yen… while your “Shadow Tour” can visit the Château de la Reine for only 198,000 yen. On a cheap course, you just have to endure some inconveniences along the way.
Togawa: Even if you say it like that…
Sakurai: Anyway, the “Light Tour” members have just checked into the hotel. We’ll be leaving the hotel soon, so go ahead and please leave the airport now.
Togawa: I’m saved!
Sakurai: Are you going to be ok? You have to do the room assignments exactly as I told you. First is room 201, where the Shimoda couple is staying. (In the corridor of the hotel, the figures of the Shimoda couple can be seen.) They seem to be in charge of management for a large electrical company, but the economy hasn’t been very good to that kind of business lately.
Then, room 202 has the real estate kingpin, Mr. Kanezawa. (Similarly, Kanezawa and Michiru can be seen in the background.) He says the reason he joined this tour is to make plans for a Paris-themed casino in Las Vegas- which is more the type of business the economy has been kind to lately. The girl with him, Miss Michiru, is a former hostess… I thought she was his fiancée, but I’m not actually sure…
Togawa: And for the “Shadow Tour”, room 201 is the Iwanamis. And room 202 is the Tannos, right?
Sakurai: Right. But then the trouble comes in room 203, with the writer Kitashirakawa and his editor Ms. Hayami.
As the stage turns, the set of room 203 appears and Kitashirakawa working at the desk comes into view, working on his novel.
Togawa: Trouble?
Sakurai: Mr. Kitashirakawa! If I take my eyes off of him for even a second I don’t know what he’ll do. He walks around with the air of a celebrity- he thinks he’s so special…
Kitashirakawa: ACHOO
Kitashirakawa sneezes.
(TN: In Japan, it’s a common superstition that when you sneeze, it means someone is talking behind your back.)
Togawa: So, after we arrive at the hotel, what should we do?...
Sakurai: After about two hours, take everyone sightseeing.
Togawa: Got it. But… after that…?
Sakurai: You’ve already got a plan, don’t you?
Togawa: The only thing the plan says is ‘don’t come back to the hotel until morning’?!
Sakurai: Oui, monsieur. Bon voyage. Have a good trip.
Sakurai hangs up the phone.
Togawa: Wait… Ms. Reiko? Ms. Reiko!?
On opposite sides of the bridge, Sakurai and Togawa exit the stage.
Scene 3: Château de la Reine (Room 203)
As the setting of Room 203 turns to the front, Kitashirakawa is sitting as his desk with his manuscript in front of him. His writing progress is not going as well as he thought…
Kitashirakawa: Aaah, it’s no good! I can’t write anything!... I was sure the Angel of Inspiration had visited me before… As I thought from the beginning, this is impossible… writing a romance novel about Louis XIV…
Kitashirakawa sighs, walking up to look at the portrait of Louis XIV in the room.
Kitashirakawa: (impatiently) Look at this ‘perfect’ guy. Politics… Love… Everything the perfect Sun King wanted, he got! When it comes to writing novels, that kind of life is just boring.
Suddenly the light disappears, and a man’s voice echoes through the room.
Louis: (Voice) Boring?! What would someone like you know about my life?!...
Kitashirakawa: What was that voice?...
Behind Kitashirakawa, the ghostly figure of King Louis XIV appears from the painting.
Louis: Barre-toi! Remove yourself from my presence immediately!
Kitashirakawa: (happily) It’s here! It’s here, it’s here, it’s here, it’s here!
Louis: This home is not a place for lowly monkeys like you to visit!
Kitashirakawa: And look! It’s even appeared in the form of Louis XIV himself… Amazing! It’s as if the archangel Michael himself has come before me!
Louis: What nonsense are you spouting? Were you not listening to what I said?
Kitashirakawa: With such kingly flourish! As if 300 years had not past, Louis XIV has been revived before me! Now, Angel of Stories, bestow upon me thine inspiration!
Louis: I am not an angel! I am the owner of the Château de la Reine, Louis XIV.
Kitashirakawa: Louis XIV? … You mean, the actual ghost of the Sun King?
Louis: Do you finally understand? So… are you properly terrified?
Kitashirakawa: Terrified? My pure talent is what’s terrifying! That my overflowing imagination could summon forth even this level of paranormal experience!...
Louis: What is wrong with this guy?
Kitashirakawa: Hey, tell me… If you really are Louis XIV like you say, then you’ve got to know something- right? Something you’ve never told anyone… For example, a tragic love story…
Louis: Why would I speak to you about such things?
Kitashirakawa: So that I can finish my romance novel- with you as the main character!
Louis: How rude! As if I would let you write my secrets into a novel!
Kitashirakawa: Meaning… there is something!
Louis: It has absolutely nothing to do with you.
Kitashirakawa: What kind of secret could it be! Some sort of affair with a noble woman? Or perhaps- a man….?
Louis: I do not have that kind of interest.
Kitashirakawa: Then perhaps you fell prey to the machinations of a woman who only wanted you for your status and power…?
Louis: How dare you! Diana is not that kind of woman!
Kitashirakawa: ~Diana~?
Louis: Ack!
Kitashirakawa: So, that is the name of the woman you loved?
Louis: Silence!
Kitashirakawa: Diana… Diana… The name Diana wasn’t listed in anything to do with Louis that I can remember. But Diana is the name of the Moon Goddess… A forbidden love story between the Sun King and the Moon Goddess… This could work! This could definitely work!
Shocked and appalled at the monkey Kitashirakawa, Louis returns to his place in the painting. The light returns to the room, and the sound of knocking can be heard at the door.
Sakurai: (voice) Mr. Kitashirakawa? Ms. Hayami?
Kitashirakawa: What? I’m finally at a good place…
Sakurai: (voice) Mr. Kitashirakawa? You’re there, aren’t you?
Kitashirakawa: It’s that woman again? Hayami! Hayami!
Hayami comes out of a nearby door to the next room.
Hayami: Yes, yes, Hayami is here!
Kitashirakawa: (Pointing at the door) Do something about her! A wonderful Angel of Inspiration has finally appeared to me! (Realizes that Louis has disappeared) Huh? Where’d he go?
Kitashirakawa goes to inspect the portrait, but the knocking sound returns.
Sakurai: Mr. Kitashirakawa! Ms. Hayami!
When Hayami opens the door, Sakurai jumps into the room.
Sakurai: What on earth are you doing? It’s time for us to depart for the dinner cruise!
Hayami: Oh, is that so?
Sakurai: All of the other customers are already gathered and waiting!
Kitashirakawa: Really? Well, on the contrary, I will not be attending.
Sakurai: That… I cannot allow that! Such selfish behavior will cause trouble for the other customers!
Kitashirakawa: What kind of trouble could it cause? This is my room, after all.
The local guide Pierre enters the room.
Pierre: Madame Reiko, if we do not hurry, we will be late for the dinner cruise!
Hayami: What… an attractive man…
Pierre: Enchanté! I am your local guide- Pierre!
Sakurai: Monsieur Pierre, please gather the other customers and leave the hotel first. I will bring Mr. Kitashirakawa to the cruise myself.
Pierre: J’ai compris.
Sakurai: Sensei… would you mind…?
Kitashirakawa: Yeah, go and enjoy it for me, too.
Pierre escorts Hayami from the room.
Sakurai: Mr. Kitashirakawa, please come with me!
Kitashirakawa: I’d rather write my novel!
Sakurai: You can write it later, can’t you? For example, after the dinner cruise…
Kitashirakawa: You are so persistent!
Sakurai’s mobile phone begins to ring.
Sakurai: (answering the phone) Hello?
Kitashirakawa: If you’re going to chat on the phone, leave the room!
Togawa: (voice) Ms. Reiko! We finally arrived at the Château de la Reine! I just delivered everyone their room keys.
Sakurai: No! No! You have to take the customers out sightseeing immediately!
Togawa: (voice) Ms. Reiko!?
Sakurai hurriedly hangs up the phone.
Sakurai: What should I do…
Sakurai begins to clean up Kitashirakawa’s things.
Kitashirakawa: HEY! What are you doing?!
Sakurai: What does it look like- cleaning!
Kitashirakawa: But WHY?
Sakurai: Because if I don’t clean, we’ll be in a lot of trouble!
Kitashirakawa: Hey!
Crayon: (voice) Here it is! Room 203! Mako-chan, hurry and open it~
Kitashirakawa: Whose voice is that?
Kondo: (voice) Who are you callin’ Mako-chan!!
Crayon: (voice) Since your name’s Kondo Makoto, you’re now Mako-chan!
As Crayon and Kondo approach from the hall, the sound of keys opening the door can be heard. Sakurai drags Kitashirakawa behind the sofa and pushes him down.
Kitashirakawa: GYA!
Sakurai: This is bad! This is bad!
Crayon and Kondo enter the room.
Crayon: Wow! What a wonderful room! It’s kind of like being on a honeymoon~ (Crayons skips over to Kondo)
Kondo: How is it a honeymoon with two men!?
Togawa appears in the doorway.
Togawa: Mr. Kondo, Ms. (?) Crayon. It’s a bit earlier than planned, but I’d like to take you on your first sightseeing tour now…
Kondo: You saved me! Well then, quickly- to sightseeing! Sightseeing, sightseeing…
Kondo quickly runs from the room as if to escape.
Crayon: Hey, Mako-chan! Wait for me!
Crayon leaves the room, following Kondo. Kitashirakawa and Sakurai appear from behind the sofa.
Kitashirakawa: I can’t!... I can’t breathe!
Togawa: Ms. Reiko!?
Sakurai: Togawa! What are you doing? Hurry up and follow the customers!
Togawa: What are YOU doing, Ms. Reiko!? Behind a sofa… alone with a man!
Sakurai: This isn’t the time for weird misunderstandings!
Togawa: But…
Sakurai: Just hurry up and go after the customers!!
Togawa: Y-Yes!
Togawa runs out of the room in a hurry.
Kitashirakawa: HEY! What the hell just happened!? And what was with that okama couple!?
Sakurai: Ah, it must be, a slight error with the hotel…
Kitashirakawa: SLIGHT error?!
Sakurai: Anyway, it seems like there isn’t anything to worry about with the room, so please continue writing your novel at your leisure. Well then, I’ll take my leave…
Sakurai rushes from the room.
Kitashirakawa: HEY! Wait a minute!
Kitashirakawa runs from the room chasing after Sakurai. Once they’re both gone, the ghost of Louis XIV returns, accompanied by strange music.
Louis: Munon. Do something about these monkeys!
Munon: Even if you ask milord, what could I do…
Louis: With people like that around, I’ll never be able to communicate with Diana’s soul.
Munon: I’ve been searching with your majesty for Diana for over 300 years now… Could Madame Diana possibly still be in this Château?
Louis: Are you doubting me?!
Munon: I held no such intent, sire…
Louis: I am certain that I heard Diana’s voice in this Château. She must still be wandering through that deep darkness…
Scene 4: Château de la Reine (Courtyard Entrance)
Lonely music plays. The stage changes to the Château in the 17th century, covered in moonlight. (This is a mental image by Louis.) While Louis sings on the ginkyo, Diana can be seen standing in the gardens, covered in moonlight.
[The Sun and the Moon]
Louis: Diana… even if you never forgive me, my soul will eternally search for you, my love…
No one knows
How the Sun King of France
Hid darkness within his heart
And how that darkness
Was illuminated by the light of the gentle moon.
In the interlude of the song, Petit Louis appears from inside the house.
Petit Louis: Maman!
Diana: Petit Louis…
As Petit Louis approaches Diana, one leg drags behind him as if hurt.
Petit Louis: Maman! Tell me about father! He was a soldier, right? A soldier who courageously fought against Spain and was a hero of France?
Diana: No. Your father was but a weakling. He gave into the Spanish blood running in his veins and abandoned us.
Petit Louis: Papa… abandoned…?
Diana: Forgive me, Petit Louis. If mama hadn’t believed in your father so much, then your leg wouldn’t…
Petit Louis: Don’t cry, Maman! I’m fine as long as I have Maman! I won’t ever ask about Papa again. So please… don’t cry, Maman.
Diana: Petit Louis…
Diana and Petit Louis share a strong embrace.
Louis: Forgive me! … Diana! Petit Louis!...
Diana
Goddess of the moon, who illuminated my heart
I search only for you
Diana
The only proof I ever lived Diana: The only proof I ever lived
I will keep searching for you I wish to forget it…
If only to be able to express to you The cruel Sun King’s
My sincere love… ‘Sincere’ love…
Diana!
As the light fades around them, the stage turns to the next scene.
Scene 5: The City of Paris
Sakurai appears on a dark street outside of the hotel, quickly followed by Kitashirakawa chasing after her.
Kitashirakawa: HEY! Wait a minute! Stop trying to escape!?
Sakurai: Escape?... No, I’m only trying to join everyone on the dinner cruise…
Kitashirakawa: You can’t hide this sham from me anymore! I figured it out the moment I saw those other guys that came in earlier. This double-booking situation was planned from the beginning!
Sakurai: … I’m truly truly sorry!
Having been found out, Sakurai begins apologizing and bowing vigorously in defeat.
Kitashirakawa: You can’t fool the keen eyes of a novelist!
Sakurai: I truly had no choice! Although we planned this expensive tour with the Château de la Reine, we couldn’t attract as many customers as we thought! So… we had to plan a second, cheaper tour attraction…
Kitashirakawa: As I thought! … Well, in planning this second fraudulent trip, were you able to satisfy your greed for money?
Sakurai: If we didn’t manage to collect enough for our settlement by this month’s deadline, my company would go bankrupt!...
Kitashirakawa: Your circumstances really don’t mean anything to me…
Sakurai: Yes, you are right… No matter what the circumstances are, I did something terrible to everyone here… At the very least, I plan to take full responsibility for my actions. I apologize, it is all my fault that this tour will end prematurely…
Kitashirakawa: End?...
Sakurai: Of course, we will offer full reimbursement of your money…
Kitashirakawa: Wait a minute, who said anything about stopping the tour?
Sakurai: I’m truly sorry, but there’s no way for me to reserve the necessary amount of rooms… So, there’s no other way.
Kitashirakawa: Then, you should just continue as is, right?
Sakurai: …What?
Kitashirakawa: The double-booking tour.
Sakurai: What are you saying?
Kitashirakawa: As of now, the only one who’s noticed your little plan is this brilliant author here. None of the other customers have noticed anything at all.
Sakurai: To continue the tour… Are you saying you’ll help me?
Kitashirakawa: Well, I guess something like that…
Sakurai: You would do that for me…
Kitashirakawa: Don’t misunderstand! It’s really not for you.
Sakurai: Then, instead… you don’t mean, for me to spend the night with you…!?
Kitashirakawa: It’s nothing like that!? If the tour were to stop now, it would be a huge problem for me!
Sakurai: What do you mean?
Kitashirakawa: While on this tour, I HAVE to write a new novel by any means necessary! A brilliant masterpiece to resurrect the name of Kitashirakawa Ukyo! Recently I’ve been squeaking by with small serializations here and there- my career as a novelist hangs on the success of this tour!
Sakurai: But, to continue tricking the other customers with the double booking for such a reason…
Kitashirakawa: Anyway, in order to keep up with your sham, I’ll go along with your plan starting tomorrow morning and follow your boring sightseeing or whatever…
Sakurai: Thank you so much! … Well, I don’t know if I should really be thanking you or…
Kitashirakawa: Well, then! I’m going back to my room to write my novel, so don’t interrupt me again! (He goes to leave, then stops.) And make sure none of the others catch on to your plan- do your job properly! Huh!
Turning his back on Sakurai, Kitashirakawa exits the stage. The music slowly changes to Sakurai’s song.
[Another étranger] (TN: étranger means ‘stranger’? This could potentially be very wrong.)
Sakurai: To suddenly chase after someone
I feel something pass through my heart
With kindness And with coldness- The feelings I avoided
Seem to be reaching out.
The bustle and laughter of the city
All belong to someone other than me.
Just another étranger
Like I see reflected in the shop windows
I desired a time long past.
A temperamental traveler
Just another étranger.
But I can see it reflected In someone’s eyes…
The destination I’ve been searching for
Another me
Like a lost child.
And staring at myself when I cannot move…
Is just another étranger.
Finishing the song, Sakurai exits the stage.
Scene 6: Parfum de la Lune
A cabaret in Montmartre, a can-can singer appears during a drum roll. He begins to introduce the start of the show.
[Parfum de la Lune]
Cancan singer: Bonsoir mesdames et messieurs. C’est parti CAN CAN! (TN: Again, was told the French was incorrect idk)
At the singer’s signal, the music picks up pace, and the back of the stage starts a brilliant and shocking Cancan dance. In the audience sit the members of Togawa’s tourist group. Half way through the show, the dancers move to dance among the audience, urging them to dance along. Crayon happily dances along, while Kondo seems embarrassed. The Tannos watch everyone suspiciously.
Cancan singer: Parfum de la Lune
The sweet scent invites you
Parfum de la Lune
Gaze up at the moon in the night sky
Like a fragrant aphrodisiac
Parfum de la Lune
Cancan girls: Even if you’re bored
Or been sightseeing all day
Anyone is welcome here!
Garçon: Do you want to forget that lonely feeling?
Well, let’s get started!
It’s time for our dazzling show!
Cancan singer: Parfum de la Lune
Those are magical words
Parfum de la Lune
The song here is always one of love
Until the moon finally sets!
With the customers: Parfum de la Lune
Parfum de la Lune
Parfum de la Lune Ah!
All: Let’s play through the night!
Ah Ah Ah Ah!
Once the song is over, everyone makes their way back to their seats.
Crayon: To be able to dance the cancan at a real cabaret! It’s like a dream! Right, Mako-chan~?
Kondo: I keep telling you, don’t involve me!
Mr. Tanno: Mr. Togawa, shouldn’t we be getting back to the hotel?
Togawa: That… Mr. Tanno, our sightseeing has only just begun?
Mr. Tanno: We didn’t come here just to play around!
Kondo: Oh, so did you come here for work?
Mrs. Tanno: (Scrutinizing) We… work in import sales. So, we’re looking to buy rare brand items.
Crayon: Amazing! When we get back, can I visit your shop sometime?
Mrs. Tanno: Yes, of course! (Trying to change the course of the conversation) So, Crayon, why did you come to Paris?
Crayon: I guess you could call it a ‘heartbreak trip’. I’m trying to heal my broken heart…
Kondo: I guess okama are miserable on their own.
Crayon: How rude! Aren’t you on your own, too, Mako-chan?
Kondo: I… The person I invited… rejected me…
Crayon: Your lover?
Kondo: No, just someone I liked…
Crayon: So, you invited someone you weren’t even dating to travel to Paris with you?
Kondo: So what if I did?!
Crayon: That… for a first date, that’s a bit too much~
Mr. Tanno: Mr. Togawa, can’t we just do as we like from here? We really want to go back to the hotel.
Togawa: Mr. Tanno!
Mrs. Iwanami: Well then, we will also go back with you…
Togawa: The Iwanamis too?... Please, I can’t allow you to go off on your own!
Mr. Tanno: Why?
Togawa: The streets of Paris at night can be dangerous! If anything happened to you…
Crayon: (Grabs onto Kondo’s arm) Well then, why don’t we all go back together?
Togawa: Ms. Crayon!?
Crayon: I sure would like to be alone with Mako-chan here~ (Shimmies up to Kondo)
Kondo: STOP IT!
Togawa: That, I can’t allow it! No matter what, I will make sure that you all enjoy sightseeing in Paris ALL NIGHT!
Everyone is amazed at Togawa’s raised voice.
Crayon: Well that was sudden… I’m kind of surprised.
Togawa: (returning to his senses) I… I am so terribly sorry!
Kondo: But what do you mean by “all night”?
Togawa: That is… to say… returning to the hotel right now… would be bad…
Mr. Tanno: “Bad”?
Togawa: Actually, about our situation at the Château de la Reine… there is something that I haven’t told you all…
Mr. Iwanami: Well, how ominous! Come now, tell us…
Togawa: Then, I will tell you truthfully… The truth is, all of your guestrooms… are limited to use only during the daytime…
Mrs. Tanno: What!?
Mr. Tanno: Then what are we supposed to do during the night?
Togawa: That is why… I want you to enjoy sightseeing through the evening…
Kondo: Are you saying we’re just supposed to stroll around the city all night?
Togawa: Please don’t worry about that, there are many shops open until the early morning hours!
Kondo: That’s not actually the problem here, is it!?
Mrs. Iwanami: Mr. Togawa, what is the reason behind all this?
Togawa: That is…
Kondo: You… if you don’t tell us the full truth right now, I’m gonna arrest you!
Togawa: A-arrest!? Please, have mercy…
Mrs. Iwanami: Now, now, Mr. Kondo… Stop acting all tough, won’t you? Let’s first listen to what Mr. Togawa has to say. After all, there has to be some sort of extenuating circumstance for all this?
Prepared to divulge all, Togawa vigorously bows to them. (dogeza)
Togawa: I am so truly sorry! I… have betrayed everyone’s trust with my outrageous actions!... (crying)
Kondo: Now what’s wrong?
Crayon: Seems like he’s just crying…
Mr. Iwanami: Mr. Togawa, raise your head now. At the least, we’ve all agreed to listen to what you have to say, ok?
The stage fades into darkness.
Scene 7: The City of Paris
On the ginkyo, the members of the “Light Tour” return from their dinner cruise with Pierre. Hayami and Pierre are especially drunk…
Pierre: Everybody~! Did you enjoy the dinner cruise~?
Hayami: Yes, amazing!
Pierre: Non, the amazing one… is you~!
Hayami: Oh, Pierre… In truth, I… am a ~terrible~ woman…
Michiru: Gross! Lady, you’ve really got it bad…
Hayami: What? Are you jealous?
Michiru: That’s impossible…
Kanezawa: Is that true?! Michiru…
Michiru: Papa?
Kanezawa: Really, compared to an old man like me… (he suddenly grabs Pierre’s shoulder) you prefer young guys like this!
Michiru: What are you saying!? The only one Michiru loves is Papa!
Kanezawa: Ya swear it?
Pierre: Well, anyway… there are many places that I wish to take you as your guide!
Mrs. Shimoda: Well then, Mr. Pierre, would it be alright if I asked you something then?
Pierre: Oui, madame.
Mrs. Shimoda: I’d like for you to tell me… What is the quietest and most beautiful place in all of Paris?
Pierre: The Basilique du Sacré-Cœur!
Mr. Shimoda: Where was that?
Pierre: The Sacred Heart temple in Montmartre! It was painted by Utrillo (Maurice Utrillo) as the white temple~!
Mrs. Shimoda: Really… The Sacred Heart temple? Thank you very much.
The Shimoda couple share a meaningful gaze.
Pierre: Well then, let us return! I shall guide you all back to the hotel~!
Hayami: Eh!? We’re going home already?
Michiru: You’ve already had enough to drink, haven’t you?
Kanezawa: (Seeing Hayami tripping over her own feet) Hey, hey, lady, are you ok?
Everyone begins to exit the stage. Mr. Shimoda does not move, and Mrs. Shimoda calls back to him.
Mrs. Shimoda: Dear?
Mr. Shimoda: We… are going to end up causing some trouble for those people, aren’t we?
Mrs. Shimoda: Isn’t ok to do as we like, at least at the end? Just at the end…
Mr. Shimoda smiles at his wife, who looks at him with a sweet smile.
Mr. Shimoda: You always show me such a loving smile, even at times like this. It makes me wish I could have spared you all this…
Mrs. Shimoda tries to keep smiling.
Mr. Shimoda: Fusako… you don’t have to keep smiling. Don’t force yourself to smile.
Mrs. Shimoda tries to hide her tears. As the ending falls, the two exit the stage.
Scene 8: Château de la Reine (Room 203, Mr. Kitashirakawa’s room)
Room 203 in the Château de la Reine. After returning to the room, Kitashirakawa approaches the portrait of Louis XIV.
Kitashirakawa: Now then! No more interruptions! Come, let me once again gaze upon your true form!
After Kitashirakawa’s voice fades, there is nothing but silence.
Kitashirakawa: Please, I need to know! The truth between you and Diana- Who exactly was Diana? What is the true identity of the Moon Goddess…!?
As the lights disappear, Louis’s voice echoes through the room.
Louis: I will not forgive you…. You dare to speak Diana’s name so lightly!?
Kitashirakawa: It’s here! It’s here, it’s here, it’s here, it’s here!
Louis appears from the portrait.
Louis: Remove yourself from my presence immediately! My soul will never speak to the likes of you…
Kitashirakawa: Even with that kind of threat, do you think I would miss an opportunity like this? Now, come… tell me the story of you and Diana…!
Louis: Silence! You dare to speak her name a second time?!
Kitashirakawa: Why are you trying to hide it? What on earth happened between the two of you?
Louis: There’s no reason I should speak to the likes of you.
Kitashirakawa: Please listen. All I want is to write about your one and only true love.
Louis: True love?
Kitashirakawa: Yes! In the memoirs written about you, you’re almost like a myth- a man with only brilliant achievements and no human faults to be found. But what I want to write is about you as a man and your one true love!
Louis: How foolish… You think the King of France could ever live as a simple person?
Kitashirakawa: Well then, what was Diana to you?
Louis: …
Kitashirakawa: I’ll bet that love was your only proof you ever lived! That is the story of the Sun King that should be passed down through history!
Louis: To live as a king… there is no such thing as true love!... In order to become the Sun King of France, I expelled Dianna from Versailles and sent her here to live in this Château. No matter how much you ask, there is no ‘love story’ for you to find. I still only ask for her forgiveness, and for that reason continue to search for her soul…
Kitashirakawa: Très bien! Beautiful! The anguish of the King who had to throw his own love away… And now continues his eternal search for Diana, as just a simple man. This is the theme I’ve been looking for in my next work!
Louis: After all this, you’re still talking about such things…
Kitashirakawa: Kitashirakawa Ukyo’s second name is the Genius Romance Novelist! Within my creation, the love between two people not bound by time… Well, in my story, you would definitely be able to meet Diana again!
Louis: Foolish! For your scenario to work, Diana would have to appear before us.
Kitashirakawa: You’ll see… What’s needed to bring your reunion about… is Versailles!
Louis: Versailles!? But, she’s still here, in this Château…
Kitashirakawa: Rather, we should summon her in the place of your beautiful, shared memories! To Versailles!
The rhythm begins to change with the Background music.
[To Versailles]
Kitashirakawa: Beyond the boundaries of time
Your two souls are tied together
Louis: A man like you appeared unexpectedly
Bringing hope with you
Kitashirakawa: A fantastic story!
Louis: An absurd idea…
Kitashirakawa: Let’s draw her out!
Louis: Let’s give it a chance.
Kitashirakawa: Like Louis: Like
A feeling of a déjà vu- The feeling of falling in love
A chance to meet again! A chance to create anew,
The story of the Sun King and Moon Goddess! My story with Diana.
Kitashirakawa: Well then, to Versailles!
Louis: To Versailles!
Kitashirakawa and Louis: Let’s go find the next part of the story!
During the interlude, Munon suddenly appears without warning and interrupts the two.
Munon: But the problem is, exactly how is his Majesty to get to Versailles?
Kitashirakawa: (Shocked) Who are you?!
Louis: Munon. What’s the problem?
Munon: In that kind of dress, you would stand out to people in this modern era…
Kitashirakawa: Aah, If that’s the case, you don’t need to worry. You can just accompany me as a local guide who dresses the part for the tour.
Reassuring Louis with his bright idea, Kitashirakawa begins to lead them in song again. The three of them begin to sing together.
Kitashirakawa: When past and present intersect
An unpredictable story!
Come, to Versailles!
Louis and Munon: Quickly, to Versailles!
All three: Let’s go find the next part of the story!
Kitashirakawa: To Versailles!
Louis and Munon: Quickly, to Versailles!
Kitashirakawa: Now-
All three: Let’s begin… the next part of the story!
As the music ends, the curtain falls.
Scene 9: The City of Paris
Togawa appears on the ginkyo, followed by the members of the “Shadow Tour”. Mr. Iwanami is singing the military song “Song of the Young Eagle” while supporting the crying Togawa by the shoulder.
Mr. Iwanami: (Singing) The seven buttons of the young-blooded trainee pilots are…
(TN: This was a song used when drafting potential aviators?)
Crayon: (To Togawa) How long are you going to keep crying? Didn’t we already agree to cooperate with you so the people in the “Light Tour” don’t figure out your plan?
Togawa: But, why are you all being so nice!? After I betrayed your trust like that… you should never forgive me! (cries again)
Kondo: Stop blaming yourself so much. It was something you had to do to save your company, right?
Crayon: Mako-chan, you’re so nice!~ And after you kept going on about arresting him earlier…
Kondo: I’m making an exception. If we don’t return to the hotel, then I don’t have to worry about being attacked by an okama in the middle of the night…
Crayon: What did you just say!??
Kondo: No-Nothing in particular…
Mr. Iwanami: Mr. Togawa.
Everyone freezes at the severe tone of Mr. Iwanami’s voice.
Togawa: Y-Yes!?
Mr. Iwanami: Just smile.
Togawa: What?
Mr. Iwanami: When I was young, I left junior high school and applied to military training, where I became a zero-fighter pilot (TN: Mitsubishi A6M planes in the war). The cockpits in those planes were very small, and whenever we intercepted a B29 (TN: American Boeing B29 super fortress) … there was no guarantee whether we would live to the next day or not.
Kondo: Are we about to have to listen to this old man’s war stories?
Crayon: Mako-chan!
Mr. Iwanami: However, even when we were prepared for death, we continued to smile and laugh.
Togawa: Mr. Iwanami!
Mr. Iwanami: After my time there, I became a teacher at a special night high school because I wanted to pass that message along to the children. Do you understand? Especially when things are difficult, you just smile and laugh. Smile for someone that you care about.
Togawa: Mr. Iwanami…! (crying again)
Crayon: Aaah… He’s crying again.
Mr. Tanno: Mr. Togawa… How about this? If you just leave the “Light Tour” customers’ baggage in the rooms, we’ll make sure not to touch or disturb them. Then you can save the time needed for having to move things around, right?
Mrs. Iwanami: Oh, I think that’s a very nice idea! With that plan, we can all work together to help Mr. Togawa!
Togawa: Everyone! I, Togawa Mitsuo, will never ever forget this blessing!
Crayon: Well then, why don’t we head to the next shop? (Takes Kondo’s arm) Somewhere we can have some fun~
Mr. Iwanami: Well then, Mr. Togawa. You must continue to guide us!
Togawa: Yes!!... Well then, please follow me!
With Togawa in the lead, everyone follows along. Only the Tanno couple remain on stage.
Mrs. Tanno: How stone cold. Pretending to be honorable- like you won’t touch a thing.
Mr. Tanno: Sharing a room with a bunch of rich people from the “Light Tour” when only we’ll be there during the day. We won’t get another chance like this.
Mrs. Tanno: You… really are a bad person.
Mr. Tanno: Do you dislike it?
Mrs. Tanno: It makes me love you even more.
The couple also leaves, the stage turning to the next scene.
Scene 10: The Palace of Versailles (The Hall of Mirrors)
The Palace of Versailles is bustling with plenty of sightseeing tourists. The guide Pierre appears, leading the members of the “Light Tour”.
Pierre: Here we are! Everyone, this is the famous Palace of Versailles’ Hall of Mirrors!
Michiru: How flashy!? This is so my style.
Kanezawa: Wow! This is something! I’ve gotta have a hall like this in my hotel in Vegas, bro.
Hayami: Excuse me, everyone… would you terribly mind not speaking in such loud voices? My head feels like it’s going to break…
Mr. Shimoda: Fusako. What in the world is this place? I can’t believe that one person could have such a place built in only one generation.
Mrs. Shimoda: Well, Louis the XIV was known for his excessive spending. It was the reason the country went into bankruptcy before the French Revolution, I think…
Kitashirakawa, Louis, and Munon appear.
Louis: The one who caused bankruptcy was not I, but Louis XVI! I’m utterly embarrassed to call that man my descendant.
Mr. Shimoda: Fusako, look. There are paintings that reach up to the ceiling.
Louis: Ah, so you noticed! After I was crowned, I had these impressive paintings completed in a mere eighteen years- each one painted by Le Blanc himself. This one here is the War of Flanders, while this one is the War with the Netherlands…
Michiru: (To Kanezawa) Don’t you think that guide is amazing?!
Sakurai: (To Kitashirakawa) So you’re saying he’s… really the ghost of Louis XIV?
Kitashirakawa: Yes! The savior of my novel!
Sakurai: But, to go so far as to make him a tour guide…
Kitashirakawa: It’s a great idea, right!? The idea to make him a tour guide of Versailles suddenly struck me!
Everyone begins praising Louis’ explanations.
Kitashirakawa: Thankfully, everyone really believes he’s just a really devoted guide impersonating Louis XIV.
Mrs. Shimoda: Even so, I wonder why… For such a beautiful palace, this place seems to have a feeling of sadness to it.
Mr. Shimoda: Yes, I thought so too.
Sakurai: Mr. Shimoda, are you feeling alright?
Mr. Shimoda: Oh, yes of course! I was just… thinking about something a former teacher used to tell me all the time.
Sakurai: What was it?
Mrs. Shimoda: When times are difficult or painful… or even sad. You must laugh and survive for someone you care about.
Sakurai: Even in difficult times, for someone you care about…
Mrs. Shimoda: For us, those words are irreplaceable.
Mr. Shimoda: I think our teacher definitely wanted to pass on that hope to live to those of us with no money and no hope.
Sakurai: It’s a lovely story.
Kanezawa: Could you not tell depressing stories when we managed to come all the way to Versailles?
Mr. Shimoda: I’m sorry!... What was I thinking, ruining the mood like that…
Kitashirakawa: I disagree! It is a very interesting life view. Even if you think like that in regards to the Sun King… A king carrying darkness deep within his heart. As he thirsts for the light that can eradicate the darkness, it leads him to build this masterpiece…
Hayami: That’s Kitashirakawa-sensei for you!... What a beautiful interpretation… (suddenly feels sick)
Kitashirakawa: Hayami?
Hayami: I… need to go… to the restroom…
Pierre: Oh, Madame! I will show you the way!
Pierre accompanies Hayami off stage.
Mr. Shimoda: Well then, please excuse us as well. Come, Fusako…
Mrs. Shimoda: Ms. Reiko, are you coming?
Sakurai: Yes!
The Shimodas also exit the stage. Suddenly looking at Kanezawa, Kitashirakawa notices an incident.
Kitashirakawa: Shouldn’t you go as well?
Kanezawa: Me? … Why?
Kitashirakawa: (in a whisper) You’re crooked… (indicating Kanezawa’s wig)
Kanezawa: Crooked!?... CROOKED!?
Michiru: Papa! Where are you going!?
Kanezawa runs off stage while holding down his wig with his hands. Michiru follows him off stage.
Sakurai: That isn’t the restroom, Mr. Kanezawa! Miss Michiru!
Ms. Sakurai chases after them.
Louis: And why did I have to pretend to be your silly guide?
Kitashirakawa: Contrary to your words, you seem to be enjoying yourself quite a bit.
Munon: Yes, it did seem as if you were coming to enjoy it.
Louis: Do not make fun! Forget all that, what about Diana? When will she reveal herself to me?
Kitashirakawa: Don’t panic. We’ve set up the perfect situation for a reunion scenario!
[Reminiscence]
The background music begins.
Kitashirakawa: Our story begins with the Sun King giving a monologue. While alone in this corridor, gather all your nostalgia for Diana, and speak of the beautiful memories you shared here together! Led by your voice, other ghosts may appear and disappear… And among them, you alone can locate her true form! Now, call out to the Moon Goddess, to Diana’s soul…!
As the lights change with the music, aristocratic looking men and women begin to fill the corridor with dancing. Among a group of a dancers, the nervous Diana appears. Kitashirakawa and Munon move to the front of the stage to ‘watch’.
Louis: The first time I met Diana… was at the ball to celebrate the victory of my first battle as king. Although she was only brought into the palace to serve as a maid to the queen, she was luminous… as bright and beautiful as the moon goddess herself…
Aristocrats: Dance! Dance!
Together with the unsetting sun
Dance! Dance!
Even as the night begins to fall
Louis dances his way through the people, arriving in front of Diana and offering her his hand.
Diana: Forgive me, I cannot dance.
Louis: Do I displease you?
Diana: No, but I must present myself to the king…
Louis: In that case, you need not worry. I can assure you the king will not be at his station this evening.
Offering his hand again, Diana slowly accepts. The two begin to dance.
Munon: When His Majesty was young, he narrowly escaped death due to the actions of some unreasonable nobility- causing His Majesty a lifetime of pain and mistrust in people. No one could truly understand the depths of suspicion and loneliness in his heart.
(TN: Possible reference to the Fronde Rebellion?)
Kitashirakawa: So, the one who lifted that loneliness was the Moon Goddess Diana…
Aristocrats: Dance! Dance!
Together with the unsetting sun
Dance! Dance!
Diana disappears in the crowd of noblemen, and Queen Maria Theresa and Louis’s mother Anne appear.
Maria Theresa: Your Majesty, answer me. Is it true that vile woman you’ve taken in is now with child?
Louis: Watch your tongue, Queen. If the child is born a boy, then Diana will be the mother to my heir.
Maria Theresa: So… you even intend to hand over the throne to that child!?
Anne: My Queen, His Majesty has been fooled by that woman. His sanity may be lost for now, but soon he will come to realize his own mistake!
Louis: No, mother. My only mistake was ever accepting a princess of the enemy Spain as my Queen! My child with Diana will be my true legacy!
Maria Theresa: What are you saying!?
Anne: Apparently, his Majesty seems to have forgotten. That the child born to him of that woman will also have the blood of Spain running in their veins.
Anne makes a face to indicate that she has a plan and urges Maria Theresa to follow her, and they disappear into the dancing. Louis, angry and with no place to go, dances among the middle.
Aristocrats: Praise! Praise!
The birth of a long desired son
Cutting through the darkness of night the child of the Sun of France!
A baby’s first cries echo through the halls, and Louis breaks away from the dancers.
Louis: Petit Louis!... The child of the Sun of France!
As Louis moves to try to go to Diana, Anne stands in his way.
Anne: Your Majesty, where do you think you are going?
Louis: To see Diana!
Anne: You cannot. Your Majesty must, for the sake of France, always continue to dance!
In an eerie formation, the noblemen gather around Louis and dance, tossing him about.
Aristocrats: Dance! Dance!
Even if the sun sets
Dance Dance
Within the great darkness, The King continues to dance.
In a cross formation, the nobles move around Louis and swallow him. The back of the hall of mirrors changes to a balcony in the palace. On the balcony, Diana is holding her newborn baby close. Maria Theresa approaches her.
Maria Theresa: Madame Diana… Allow me to hold the child.
Diana: My Queen, it would be too high of an honor…
Maria Theresa: Well, show him to me quickly!
Maria Theresa takes Petit Louis from Diana by force.
Diana: My Queen!
Maria Theresa: Well, how adorable… he looks just like His Majesty…
Diana: My Queen?
Standing over the handrail, Maria Theresa lifts Petit Louis high. A disturbing twilight begins to spread in the background.
Maria Theresa: Louis de Soleil de France… The child of the Sun of France!!
Louis: Stop!!...
As the music hits a shocking accent, Maria Theresa drops Petit Louis off the edge of the balcony. At the same time, Louis manages to shake off the smothering nobles. Along with the accented music, the scene changes. While the nobles continue their disturbing song, they slowly move off stage.
Aristocrats: Dance Dance
Together with the unsetting sun
Dance Dance
The glory of the King shines…
Kitashirakawa: But… Petit Louis… What happened to Petit Louis…!?
Munon: Fortunately, his life was spared. But one leg was severely injured, and never properly healed… And so that no more danger would ever befall those two, his Majesty sent Diana away to that Château under the pretext of exiling her…
Kitashirakawa: So, the reason Louis continued to live as the Sun King of France was to protect the ones he loved… but, that love became nothing but despair for Diana…
Finally released from the memories, Louis approaches Kitashirakawa.
Louis: Diana… Where is Diana? (To Kitashirakawa) Why hasn’t she revealed herself?
Kitashirakawa: …
Louis: Answer me! When will Diana be revealed to me?
Kitashirakawa: … I don’t know.
Louis: You don’t know? Didn’t you say if we followed your scenario, then I could find her?!
Kitashirakawa: I don’t know! If you say that the thing that drove Diana’s heart deeper into the darkness was your love, then what would be the light that summons her back to you… How would I write that?
Louis: You have deceived me! Because you just wanted to write your little novel, you tricked me into telling you about Diana!
Kitashirakawa: No, that’s not it!
Louis: You said you wanted to write about true love? For someone that plays with others’ hearts and only thinks about himself… you’ll never be able to write about something like love! No, not of love, and not of anything that could ever touch a person’s heart! Leave my Château immediately… That is my final warning to you.
Louis spares Kitashirakawa one last glare as he leaves.
Munon: Your Highness! Please wait… Your Highness!
Munon chases after Louis. As Kitashirakawa is left on stage by himself, the setting falls into darkness.
[The Story I Wanted to Write]
Kitashirakawa: An empty heart-
And writing to fill it
With the memories of someone other than myself.
And never allowing anyone to read…
The tightly closed and blank pages deep in my heart
What I wanted to write
Were the words of the magic I believed in as a child
Adults always spun Such kind stories of lies.
What I wanted to write was the continuation of an unseen dream
But I don’t even know the truth of a ‘story’.
And the resulting scratches of pain hidden in my heart…
I never noticed them.
Scene 11: Château de la Reine (Room 201 and Room 202)
In room 202 of the Château de la Reine, The Tanno couple is going through Kanezawa and Michiru’s baggage.
Mrs. Tanno: Darling, look!
Mr. Tanno: This is amazing! These are all top brand goods!
Mrs. Tanno: What’s this? (She pulls a hair bundle out of the suitcase.)
Mr. Tanno: Isn’t that a wig?
Mrs. Tanno: Gross!! (She tosses it away.)
On the other side of the stage, the Iwanamis are relaxing with some tea from room service.
Mr. Iwanami: No matter how you think about it, this is quite a strange tour. Even if it’s only during the day, being able to stay in such a nice hotel sure is fun. We should really be thankful, don’t you think?
Mrs. Iwanami: Yes, even though we’re sharing with the Light Tour.
Back to room 202.
Mr. Tanno: Even so, this is exactly the kind of thing that will build up our reputation! *
Mrs. Tanno: Right! With high-end goods to resell, it’s much more efficient than something like card fraud.
Mr. Tanno: Let’s go and sell some of these things in the Jewish shops, then we’ll quickly slip away with no one the wiser.
Mrs. Tanno: Right!
The Tannos begin packing up all the brand goods they’ve found in the room into one suitcase. Meanwhile, in room 201, Mr. Iwanami walks over to the side table and picks some stationary he finds.
Mr. Iwanami: Oh, what’s this? A letter?
Mrs. Iwanami: You know reading other people’s letters without their permission is bad taste.
Mr. Iwanami: You read it too!
Mrs. Iwanami runs her eyes over the stationary her husband hands to her.
Mrs. Iwanami: (as she’s reading) On our journey to Paris… we will also depart on another journey… Dear, is this… is this a suicide note?!
Mr. Iwanami: Yes, it looks like their factory went bankrupt, and they’ve written that they’re hundreds of millions of yen in debt.
Mrs. Iwanami: This is terrible… We have to tell Mr. Togawa right away!
As the stage turns, we see the corridor of the hotel. The Iwanamis exit the door of their room in a hurry.
Mr. Iwanami: Mr. Togawa! Mr. Togawa! It’s terrible!
At the same time, the Tannos are trying to leave their room, causing the two men to run into each other.
Mr. Tanno and Mr. Iwanami: Wah! Gya!
In the collision, the bag that Mr. Tanno was carrying suddenly opens and the goods fall onto the floor. Having heard Mr. Iwanami’s yells, Mr. Togawa approaches.
Togawa: Mr. Iwanami, Mr. Tanno, are you alright?
Mr. Iwanami: Don’t worry about us! Quickly, come here!
The Tannos quickly begin picking up their stolen goods.
Togawa: These brand goods… aren’t these Mr. Kanezawa’s things he left in the room!?
Mr. Iwanami: What!? Then that means?
Togawa: You don’t mean, you two are stealing!?
Mr. Tanno: Damn it!
Mr. Iwanami: (To Togawa) The police! Call the police now!
Togawa: If you need the police, then Mr. Kondo is in room 203…
Mr. Iwanami: Right! (He puts Mr. Tanno into an iron grip)
Mr. Tanno: Ouch! For an old man, how are you this stupidly strong!?
Mr. Iwanami: Whaddya think? Don’t mistake this former navy seal as a sweet old man!
Mrs. Iwanami: Dear! Worry about that later! Hurry, look at this…
Mrs. Iwanami hands the stationary to Togawa.
Togawa: (reading quickly) Is this… a suicide note!? Who wrote this!?
Mrs. Iwanami: It was left in our room. So it definitely belongs to whoever else is staying there!
Togawa: The guest staying in room 203 from the ‘Light Tour’… That’s the Shimodas! What should we do?! Right now, they might be…
Mrs. Iwanami: We have to tell the police now!
Togawa: Then we should go to room 203!
Everyone leaves the stage in a hurry as the ending music plays.
Scene 12: Palace of Versailles (Gardens)
At a garden in the palace, Kitashirakawa stands alone. Sakurai appears on stage, finding him.
Sakurai: Mr. Kitashirakawa! Just when I thought everyone else had come back, I realized you were gone again. Didn’t you say you were going to cooperate with me?
Kitashirakawa: Is it ok for you to not be watching over the others?
Sakurai: The others are all following Pierre and looking for you. Alright, let’s get back to the group and continue our sightseeing for the day.
Kitashirakawa: Sorry, but… I’m going to go home. Alone.
Sakurai: Are we back at this again? Right now, the ‘Shadow Tour’ members are at the hotel…
Kitashirakawa: I don’t mean go back to my room. If I could just have my baggage collected, I’d like to leave the hotel as soon as possible.
Sakurai: What do you mean?
Kitashirakawa: It’s earlier than planned, but I’m leaving Paris. I know it’s last minute, but could I ask you to help me book a flight?
Sakurai: What…?
Kitashirakawa: You don’t have to worry. I won’t tell anyone about the double booking arrangement. Ah, you can tell the other tour members that I had to leave for some sudden work or something…
Sakurai: But, what about your novel?
Kitashirakawa: My novels… they’re really not important, are they?
Sakurai: Not important!? You said that your career as a writer was hanging in the balance, didn’t you? You said you had to write a masterpiece, right?
Kitashirakawa: Yes, you’re right… But as I am now, I cannot hope to write the masterpiece I wished for…
Sakurai: But… I mean, if you work with that ghost of Louis XIV from earlier…
Kitashirakawa: No, Louis won’t appear to me again. And even if he were here, it doesn’t change the fact that my talent is what’s truly missing.
Sakurai: Saying such self-deprecating things is really not like you. You’re usually walking around with that celeb-aura and brimming with overconfidence?!
Kitashirakawa: Are you… trying to make me feel better?
Sakurai: I’m sorry, I just…
Kitashirakawa: No, it is as you say. I always had confidence in my own talent and believed that I could create any kind of story. But as I have always lived thinking only about myself, how can I even begin to write a story about someone else?
Sakurai: Then, what is your story? Shouldn’t you just write a story about yourself? Actually, I thought about it earlier while listening to the Shimodas’ story. Every person holds within them the words to give another person hope. So, you just have to find them! Those irreplaceable words… your story definitely has them, too.
Kitashirakawa: My story… Could it be that I, as the protagonist, lost sight of my own story?
[A Novel Without a Protagonist]
Kitashirakawa: I wonder when it began?
That I was writing
Such selfish scenarios.
Decorating my words
With only self-recognition-
Of a Celebrity Novelist! To distract from
And erase my anxiety…
Sakurai: At some point, I chose without realizing
A journey full of trouble.
On a road without a map
I continued with strength!
When all I really wanted
Was for someone to walk with me.
Kitashirakawa and Sakurai: What vanity-
To walk alone on this road
Like a novel without a protagonist.
Seeking for… And performing as…
An idealized version of myself.
And even, perhaps, without realizing
Hurting someone else
And continuing to search
Kitashirakawa: What I lost sight of…
Sakurai: What I forgot…
Together: The true protagonist
Of my life.
Kitashirakawa: Can I write it someday? My own story that gives someone else hope?
Sakurai: Yes! For someone like me, who’s lost their own way in life…
Suddenly, Sakurai’s phone begins to ring.
Sakurai: (Checking the phone) It’s Togawa. (answers) Hello?
Togawa: (voice) This is terrible! P-Please, calm down and listen!...
Sakurai: I think you should probably calm down first…
Following Pierre, the other members of the ‘Light Tour’ notice Kitashirakawa and Sakurai. Sakurai moves to a separate area to talk.
Kanezawa: Hey! We found ‘em!
Pierre: Oh! We finally found you! We searched everywhere!
Hayami: Sensei! (notices Sakurai) and… Ms. Reiko!? What are the two of you doing!?
Kitashirakawa: What? Nothing in particular?
Michiru: All alone, just the two of you? Suspicious~
Kitashirakawa: There’s nothing suspicious about it!
Sakurai: What did you say!? That can’t be true. They’re right here with everyone else in the ‘Light Tour’ now… (Notices that the Shimodas are missing) Where are the Shimodas?
Pierre: Now that you mention it, I haven’t seen them for a while…
Kitashirakawa: Is something wrong?
Sakurai: (in shock) It seems… a suicide note was found in their room…
All: A suicide note?!
Sakurai: What should I do?... (She begins to put together the signs so far.) Those two, from the beginning… they must have been planning this all along…
Michiru: They’ve gotta be somewhere in the palace?
Kitashirakawa: Why would anyone plan something like that here?
Kanezawa: If it were me, I’d wanna go in the most magnificent place possible!
Kitashirakawa: (amazed) The only one who thinks that way is you. Anyway, we have to find them as quickly as possible! (To Sakurai) The other group of tourists, can we ask them for their help too?
Sakurai: (preparing herself) Yes! Of course we can! I’ll relay the plan to Togawa by phone…
Hayami: What do you mean by the other group of tourists?
Kitashirakawa: Right now, finding the Shimodas comes first! We have to find them before it’s too late!
The intro to the next number begins.
Scene 13A: The City of Paris
The ‘Light Tour’ members line up in front of the curtain.
[An Extraordinary Search!]
Kitashirakawa: There is no time
For us to waste!
All: It’s an emergency!
Kitashirakawa: We’ll succeed with our
Imaginations!
All: Where could they be?
Kitashirakawa: Like opening a guide map
Believe in your intuition!
Kanezawa: The Arc du Triomphe or the Eiffel Tower?
Michiru: How about a gorgeous and luxurious opera house?
Kitashirakawa: Those weren’t on the sightseeing course!
Sakurai: If it’s a forest then the Boulogne or Vincennes
Hayami: How about the Montparnasse Cemetery?
Pierre: Notre Dame could be suspect, too!
Kitashirakawa: We’ll have to find them ourselves!
All: Let’s go through the city of Paris
On an Extraordinary search!
Let’s go through the city of Paris
On an Extraordinary search!
Kitashirakawa: Hurry!
The Light Tour members break off into pairs to search and exit the stage in different directions: Kitashirakawa and Sakurai, Kanezawa and Michiru, and Hayami and Pierre.
Scene 13B: Château de la Reine (Room 203)
The curtain rises to reveal room 203 of the Château de la Reine. The Tannos have been handcuffed. The music fades into BGM.
Kondo: It was lucky we were on the same tour. I’ll be taking these two back to Japan to face responsibility for their actions.
Mr. Tanno: Are you stupid?
Kondo: What’d you say!?
Mr. Tanno: Don’t you know that a Japanese policeman has no right to arrest people in another country?
Kondo: I dunno anything like that! All I know is when I see a criminal in front of me, I arrest ‘em!
Crayon: Kya~! Mako-chan, you’re so cool! … Even if what you’re saying is a bit unreasonable…
Togawa: Forget all that, we should hurry to help in the search for the Shimodas!
Mr. Iwanami: That’s right! What about the ‘Light Tour’?
Togawa: They’ve split up and are visiting famous places!
Mr. Iwanami: Then, we should also split up and search…
Mrs. Iwanami: But, I have no idea where in Paris someone might want to commit a lovers’ suicide!
Suddenly, the light in the room disappears as Louis’s voice sounds.
Louis: Lovers’ suicide?!
Crayon: (clinging to Kondo) What… what was that voice? Scary!!!
Kondo: Quite clinging to me so suddenly!
Stepping out from the painting, Louis and Munon appear.
Louis: First daring to deceive me, and then finding thieves amongst your allies… Does your shame know no end?! And now you dare to bring about death upon my territory!? I will not allow it!
Togawa: Um, excuse me but, what… are you?
Kondo: (To Crayon) Friend of yours?
Crayon: I dunno this guy!
Louis: Silence, now! Before it is too late, hurry and find those poor souls!
Togawa: But… where should we start looking?
Louis: Must I do everything!? Munon! You will be the leader.
Munon: Yes!
Louis: Come people, follow!
Everyone hurriedly follows Louis from the room. The hotel employees enter the stage from all sides.
Duran: The customer is in trouble!
Workers: The Hotel is in trouble, too!
Duran: What an unprecedented incident!
Workers: Brought to light by the double booking…
All: We need to find a solution!
To protect the Château de la Reine’s
Pride!
Louis and the Shadow Tour members appear on the bridge.
Louis: Now, continue to follow Shadow Tour: Being led by the Sun King
You selfish monkeys! On a search!
These Japanese tourists- Let’s go through the city of Paris
In my country! On an extraordinary search!
These kinds of actions An interesting collaboration
I will never Let’s go through the city of Paris
Allow them! On an Extraordinary search!
Scene 13C: The City of Paris (2)
As people come and go in the city, the Light Tour members run into them, causing a racket.
Kitashirakawa: Well, how’d it go?!
Hayami: We didn’t find them!
Kanezawa: We got nothin’ too. I give up.
Kitashirakawa: Aren’t there any clues? You were all with them all last night, weren’t you?
Michiru: Now that you mention it…
Sakurai: Do you have an idea?
Michiru: Hey, Pierre… Didn’t the wife ask you something? Like ‘what’s the most beautiful and quiet place’ or something?
Kitashirakawa: Why didn’t anyone say that earlier!? Hayami, you were there too, weren’t you!?
Hayami: I’m afraid I drank too must last night, my memory is…
Kitashirakawa: Miserable! Well then, what did you tell her?
Pierre: Oh! I remember! The Basilique du Sacré-Cœur!
Sakurai: The Sacred Heart Temple in Montmartre!
Kitashirakawa: Alright, let’s hurry!
All the members run off stage, forcing their way through the people, ending the scene.
Scene 14: Montmartre- The Sacred Heart Temple
Montmartre at nighttime. The stage changes to the gardens in front of the Sacred Heart Temple. A chanson singer carrying an accordion appears on stage, singing.
[Chanson]
Accordion player: As your silhouette continues to dance
My memories disappear into a dream
Those happy days are naught but nostalgia
In a phantom-like dream.
The Shimodas appear amongst other random couples, seeming confused.
Mrs. Shimoda: Darling, aren’t you cold?
Mr. Shimoda: I’m not cold, but… I’m scared. You?
Mrs. Shimoda: No, not at all.
Mr. Shimoda: But… we’re going to die?
Mrs. Shimoda: But I’m together with you.
Mr. Shimoda: Did you bring it? The hydrocyanic acid?
Mrs. Shimoda pulls a small bottle from her bag.
Mrs. Shimoda: Even the specialists don’t have this, do this?
Mr. Shimoda: It’s an old product from our factory… but it finally has some use.
Mrs. Shimoda: Look, darling, how beautiful this place is…
Mr. Shimoda: Being able to spend the last moments of our life in a place like this… is a blessing.
Mrs. Shimoda: Yes, dear.
The couple moves to sit down on the bench. Trying to hide her tears, Mrs. Shimoda turns away to hide her face.
Mr. Shimoda: Fusako?
Mrs. Shimoda forces herself to smile before turning back to him.
Mr. Shimoda: I told you, didn’t I? You don’t have to force yourself to smile. Whether you laugh or cry… these are our last moments together…
Suddenly, following Kitashirakawa, the members of the Light Tour appear.
Sakurai: You’re here! Mr. Shimoda!
Mr. Shimoda: You all…!
Kitashirakawa: Thank goodness, we made it! Now, let’s go back to the hotel…
Kitashirakawa begins to approach the couple.
Mr. Shimoda: Please don’t come any closer!
Kitashirakawa: Mr. Shimoda. I heard about the note you two left. That managing your factory took a turn for the worse, and you’ve been left in a great amount of debt…
Mr. Shimoda: Then, you understand! So please, allow us to die in peace, together…
Louis and the Shadow Tour members arrive on stage.
Louis: I will not allow any death here! Do you have no pride in your own lives? In this peaceful world, while being allowed to live freely- you would dare to not only throw away your own life, but the life of your beloved as well?
Mr. Iwanami looks at the Shimodas in surprise.
Mr. Iwanami: Y-You two…!
Mr. Shimoda: Mr. Iwanami!
Mrs. Shimoda: Sensei…
Sakurai: Do you know each other?
Mr. Iwanami: In a way… They were my students. You mean to say… you were the ones who left that note?
Mr. Iwanami begins to approach the Shimodas.
Mrs. Shimoda: Please stop! Please just… look away for a bit. Please…
Sakurai: Ms. Fusako… What was it you said before? In painful times, or in sad times, you have to smile and live for someone? Isn’t that what you told us? You said that those words gave you hope. Even so… are you saying you would choose to die like this?
Hearing Sakurai’s words, Mr. Iwanami’s facial expression looks shocked and pained.
Mr. Iwanami: Koji… Fusako… Forgive me!
Mr. Iwanami bows deeply to the couple.
Mrs. Shimoda: Sensei!
Mr. Shimoda: Please stop! Why are you apologizing…
Mr. Iwanami: I… just wanted to offer poor children a chance at equal education! I wanted you to survive- to live despite the circumstances of the environment you were born in… But in the end, it seems like I was unable to teach you anything at all…
Mrs. Shimoda: Sensei, please… raise your head. It was because your words encouraged us that we were even able to get this far!
Mr. Shimoda: Fusako…
Kitashirakawa: Mr. Shimoda. You are not the only ones dealing with misfortune. Surely everyone is doing their best to live while holding their difficulties in their heart…
Sakurai: I was also unable to properly manage my company. But… in order to protect myself, I did something much more terrible than you!
Kanezawa: For me, well money ain’t really a problem, but… I’ve got worries I can’t tell people about… (He touches a hand to his wig)
Kondo: For me, I haven’t had a girlfriend in thirty years!
Hayami: Forty-two years single!
Crayon: And I’m an okama!
Kitashirakawa: And I… hurt someone. I realized that I had lost something important as a person. But it’s something that the two of you have never forgotten! And that is how to care for someone. Even if you think that your lives have no value… to me, it’s something I can never capture in words alone… an irreplaceable story!
Mr. Iwanami: Koji Shimoda! Fusako!
The Shimodas: Yes!
Mr. Iwanami: Smile. No matter what, smile! This is the only life you get, so if you smile and laugh together… you can go on living!
The Shimodas: Ha… hahaha… (they begin to cry while laughing)
The other members of the group all begin laughing as well. As dusk falls in the sky, the Japanese tourists’ strange crying-laughter fills the air. Louis’s expression changes, as if he’s realized something, and he and Munon exit the stage. As the scene ends, the light fades.
Scene 15: The City of Paris - Places des Vosges
On the way back to the hotel, Kitashirakawa begins to sing.
[Kitashirakawa’s Song ~ Sakurai’s Song]
Kitashirakawa: I couldn’t even manage the easy things,
And every time I lost my way-
I hid my face and watched you from far away.
If I could laugh for someone
If I could laugh for myself
Then surely, I can follow my heart forward
To the person who’s smiling face I most wish to see.
During the musical interlude, the background setting changes.
1. Crayon and Kondo
Crayon runs on stage crying, followed by a confused/angry looking Kondo.
Crayon: U-Uwaaaa!!!...
Kondo: You were laughing a moment ago- why are you suddenly crying so much!?
Crayon: I just remembered when I was dumped… It feels like… I’ll never meet anyone who could possibly love me!... Uuuhuu…
Kondo: Don’t cry! Kuroiwa Gentarou.
Crayon: But… the more I try to laugh… the more miserable I feel…
Kondo: If that’s the case, then smile for me instead.
Crayon: …What?
Kondo: When you’re sad like this, I start feeling sad too…
Crayon: Mako-chan!!
Crayon runs over and tries to give Kondo an intense kiss. Kondo struggles and tries to push Crayon away, but then they face each other and Kondo kisses Crayon instead.
2. Kanezawa, Michiru, and the Tannos
Kanezawa: So ya’ll are the thieves who’ve run card scams around the world, huh?
The Tannos: …
Kanezawa: How ‘bout it? Ya’ll leave that rotten lifestyle behind and come work for me?
Mr. Tanno: What do you mean?
Kanezawa: Ya’ll’s language proficiencies and fearlessness are just a bonus! I’m saying come to Vegas and be the general managers of my casino!
Michiru: Papa!
Mrs. Tanno: In Las Vegas??
Mr. Tanno: General managers?
Kanezawa: A’ight, let’s go talk it over.
Kanezawa and Michiru get the Tannos to follow them offstage. The background music changes for Sakurai’s song.
Sakurai: The important things I forgot
When I became an adult…
Every time I lost sight of myself I kept running
With no place to go.
If I could laugh for someone
If I could laugh for myself
Then I should be able to live
Following the truth of my heart
To the person who I most want to show a smile to…
As the music fades to background, Sakurai exit the stage.
Scene 16: Château de la Reine (Courtyard Entrance)
Under the moonlight in the courtyard of the hotel, Kitashirakawa happens upon the still, thinking form of Louis.
Kitashirakawa: Louis…
Louis: It seems like you dared to return to this Château anyway.
Kitashirakawa: Once I gather my things, I’ll leave immediately. But- there’s something I want you to hear. I had no intention of deceiving you! I truly, honestly thought that I could bring you and Diana together again. But now I understand, because I didn’t take your sadness and pain seriously, there’s no way I could ever write about something like ‘true love’. But now… I feel like I understand the pain you’ve felt…
Kitashirakawa turns to enter the hotel.
Louis: Wait. Well, I can be patient for a few more days. Patience is a virtue after all… Really, when it comes to you… You really pile up trivial matters and create quite a big fuss of it all. There are many things you do that are foolish. But… what was even more foolish was that I did not truly understand what I had learned from you.
Kitashirakawa: Louis?
Louis: I realized I had forgotten how to laugh. For Diana and our son…
Petit Louis: (voice) Maman! Tell me about Papa!
Diana: (voice) Your father… is a true hero.
Petit Louis: (voice) But… why isn’t he here with us?
Diana: (voice) Your father is the Sun King who illuminates all of France. Even when he cannot be by our side, he still loves us very much.
Louis: I finally realized… that their voices were always full of laughter…
Diana and Petit Louis: (laughing)
Looking up at the moon, Louis smiles softly as the sound of Diana and Petit Louis’s laughter lift his spirits.
Louis: I finally feel as though I can truly meet Diana again. And… I’m looking forward to reading it- the novel about me.
Kitashirakawa: Is… it ok for me to write about you?
Louis: As long as you portray me as an exceptionally ‘good handsome man’, of course.
Kitashirakawa: Ha, I wonder how it’ll turn out?
Kitashirakawa, Sakurai, and Louis come together.
All three: If I could laugh for someone
If I could laugh for myself
Then surely I can meet the one I love from the bottom of my heart.
The person who’s smiling face I most wish to see…
The person who I most want to show a smile to…
Scene 17: Château de la Reine (Courtyard Entrance)
The next morning, in the opening of the hotel people begin to appear: Kanezawa and Michiru, Kondo and Crayon, and Duran. Some hotel staff follow, carrying everyone’s bags.
Duran: Oh! Monsieur Kanezawa! Is there nothing we can do to thank you for investing in the future management of the Château de la Reine?
Kanezawa: I don’t need no thank yous. Vegas may be my base, but it’s always been my dream to have hotels all over the world.
Crayon: A hotel in Vegas sounds amazing! (To Kondo) It’d be perfect for our wedding~
Kondo: W-Wedding!?
The Tanno and Shimoda couples appear.
Mr. Shimoda: Mr. Kanezawa, what is the meaning of this? I was just told that you’ve taken over our entire debt?!
Mr. Tanno: Seems like everyone here’s been hired by Kanezawa.
Mrs. Tanno: Mrs. Shimoda! Let’s go to Las Vegas together!
Kanezawa: If ya’ll were managin’ a factory all on your own, then you’re like- really good with mechanics, right? To build up my casino in Vegas, I need an advisor who understands all that state-of-the-art stuff.
Mrs. Shimoda: But…
Togawa and the Iwanamis appear.
Mr. Iwanami: Shouldn’t you just gratefully accept?
Mrs. Shimoda: Iwanami-sensei!
Mr. Iwanami: Mr. Kanezawa, I can personally vouch for these two’s personalities. (To the Shimodas) Now then, give him a proper reply.
Upon Iwanami’s words, the Shimodas gather their determination.
Mr. Shimoda: Although we are not worthy of your kindness, we humbly accept!
Kanezawa: Hey hey hey…
Mrs. Iwanami: Doesn’t it sound like you’re replying to a marriage proposal?
Togawa: Everyone! It’s about time to go! The car has arrived in the plaza!
While everyone exits the stage, Kanezawa is left with a relaxed looking Michiru.
Kanezawa: Hey, what’s wrong Michiru?
Michiru: Do you have no intention of saying anything to me?
Kanezawa: Say… something to you?
Michiru: Maybe a ‘proposal’ like what you said to those people just now…
Kanezawa: Michiru… I… I ain’t good enough to marry you. There’s something I been hiding from you…
Michiru: It really doesn’t matter to me. If you’re talking about the lie you’ve told about your looks…
Kanezawa: Michiru!? You… knew?
Michiru: For a while now.
Kanezawa: But is it really alright? Marryin’ someone like me?
Michiru: Did you really think I’d hate you for something like that?
Kanezawa: Michiru!!
Michiru: Papa!
Kanezawa holds Michiru close, kissing her passionately. As the door opens behind them, Kitashirakawa appears.
Kitashirakawa: Ugh! Why did have to see that first thing in the morning??
Kanezawa: Hey bro! Listen! Michiru and I are gonna get married!
Kanezawa: Well, congratulations on that. But, shouldn’t you look in the mirror before you do such a thing?
Kanezawa: Why?
Kitashirakawa: You’re crooked. (Indicating his wig)
Kanezawa: C-Crooked!?.... Crooked!?!
Kanezawa, looking horrified, runs off stage.
Michiru: Papa! Wait!
Michiru runs after Kanezawa off stage. Hayami appears.
Hayami: (Finishing reading the novel) Amazing… To write an entire novel of this caliber in less than a week… Sensei truly is a genius… No, a master…
Kitashirakawa: I changed the title as well. The new title is “The Queen’s Château”.
Hayami: Amazing! To create such a hypothesis that King Louis XIV’s true love lived here- and that she was the true Queen of his heart!
Kitashirakawa: Well, even so…
Hayami: Weaving the intricacies of the non-fiction tale of our real-life double booking and a fiction retelling of the ghost of Louis XIV… A story of love that transcends the boundaries of time! Make no mistake, this will become an instant best seller!
Kitashirakawa: Even though everything was actually non-fiction…
Hayami: Did you say something?
Kitashirakawa: No, just thinking out loud…
Hayami: You don’t need to worry. I’ll be editing this on the plane ride home!
As Hayami goes to leave, Pierre appears in front of her.
Hayami: Pierre!...
Pierre: Madame! Are you really… returning to Japon?
Hayami: Pierre, forgive me… I am truly… a terrible woman who can only live for her work!
Hayami runs away from Pierre.
Pierre: Ma chérie! At least let me embrace you one last time!...
Pierre chases after Hayami.
Kitashirakawa: (Speaking to himself) So even Hayami experienced such a miracle…?
Gradually, Sakurai also appears in front of Kitashirakawa, gazing up at the sky.
Sakurai: Ah, Mr. Kitashirakawa, you were still here?
Kitashirakawa: Yes, I just wanted to enjoy the scenery here one last time.
Kitashirakawa looks up to the sky, and Sakurai follows his line of sight.
Sakurai: You can see the sun and the moon together in the dawn sky…
Kitashirakawa: They were finally able to meet, the sun and the moon… I heard from Togawa. You’re closing your travel agency?
Sakurai: Yes. I need to start over from the beginning. The double booking was just too much.
Kitashirakawa: So you’re graduating from being a shabby tour guide, too?
Sakurai: Rude.
Kitashirakawa: I’m joking. So, what are you planning to do?
Sakurai: I haven’t decided yet. I think I need to take some time to really figure myself out first. You?
Kitashirakawa: Same as usual- I’ll be writing novels and chased by the pressure of deadlines.
Sakurai: I’ll be looking forward to it. The novel about your own story, like you said.
Kitashirakawa: Right.
Sakurai: Well then, I should be getting to the customers…
Sakurai begins to leave in the direction of the others.
Kitashirakawa: Actually! I have… a favor to ask of you…
Sakurai: (Stops, turning back)…
Kitashirakawa: When we get back to Japan… I’d like to interview you.
Sakurai: Me? … But, why?
Kitashirakawa: I can’t write a story with just the protagonist alone, right? So, I want to interview you… the one who reminded me of what’s important.
[Duet]
Kitashirakawa: Filled with undecorated words
Like monthly novels
Full of overflowing feelings
And interspersed with silence
Everything felt like an incomplete story.
Naturally, I was overwhelmed by this miracle.
Although I’m clumsy,
I want to move forward as myself
And grow with the passing of the seasons.
Sakurai: Even if I unexpectedly remember sadness
I don’t want to forget how to smile.
Towards an unknown world,
I will not hesitate when it’s time for that new journey.
Together: The story you write
I want to watch over it with kindness.
Using the words we believed in
Together, we can pass on
Our new story that starts now.
Scene 18: Versailles (Gardens)
After the song, the hotel area of the stage rises to reveal the fantasy-like gardens of Versailles. Meeting again at long last, Louis and Diana embrace each other. Nearby, Petit Louis and Munon watch them happily.
Kitashirakawa, embarrassed, offers his hand to Sakurai. The two leave hand in hand, with Louis, Diana, Petit Louis, and Munon watching after them. The curtain falls.
The end.
#Translation by Makalations#Takarazuka#Soragumi#Cosmos Troupe#Ouhi no Yakata#Asaka Manato#Misaki Rion#Makaze Suzuho#2017.04#Takarazuka Revue
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Ebbtide for the Defense (TGP, Episode 5)
Today Eli is forced to watch and recap Ebbtide for the Defense, Episode 5 of The Golden Palace. The girls find themselves in a delicate situation when the hotel is overbooked with lawyers and judges. Meanwhile, Chuy is visited by an unwelcome figure from his past who insists on sticking around. With a house this crowded, will the gals find a way to restore order? Keep reading to find out…
Drew may still be on hiatus, but that doesn’t mean that he’s resting on his laurels! Cap, I can’t believe that you’re taking the bullet of watching the entire run of James Bond Jr.! Not even the hosts of the James Bonding podcast are that dedicated, and I’m certainly not, so I can’t believe you’re putting yourself through the experience. I also can’t believe the makers of that show were apparently shameless enough to recycle classic Bond villains who were very clearly dead! Regardless, I salute you, and only hope that such an endeavor doesn’t sour you to the actual franchise. For now, I have my own far less ambitious business to tend to at The Golden Palace, so let’s check on in and check this out!
Buttocks tight!
Episode written by Marc Sotkin, directed by Peter D. Beyt
The episode opens with Sophia, Chuy, and Roland cooking up a storm, and we discover that Roland is a big pansy afraid of giblets, bugs, and bathroom interactions. Blanche is in the lobby fielding a call from an annoying guest, and we also learn that the hotel has been overrun with a convention of personal injury lawyers. They will be checking out on the 9th of the month, but Rose reveals that she has mistakenly booked a group of judges on the 8th. The hotel will be overbooked, and they are already short of help in the kitchen. Miraculously, a random dude walks in and hands them his resume, claiming to be a chef looking for work. Blanche hires him (apparently with no paperwork), and sends him to the kitchen immediately. It is there we find that this is Rubin, the former best friend of Chuy! We also find that Rubin was once caught in bed with Chuy’s wife! Oh, the drama! Chuy threatens the scoundrel with bodily harm and attempts to chase him off, but Rubin points out that he can’t be fired without good cause, and there is a swarm of lawyers at hand ready to take his case.
To add to the woes of the hospitality business, we next learn that the hotel has had its liability insurance cancelled, due to some minor incident in which Rose nearly drowned a guest beneath a pool cover. Big deal, right? Needless to say, the gang will have to be careful not to get into any legal trouble. Rose mentions that she has a plan to board both the lawyers and the judges, based on the details of the St. Olaf Big Monkey Trial. Don’t ask. According to Rose, if they all get cozy in a couple of rooms, and if one lawyer shares a room with one judge, they should just be able to handle everyone. Wait, why does it have to be two strangers instead of two of the lawyers or two of the judges? WHY? Roland isn’t happy about the situation either, but Blanche is on board. In the kitchen, Chuy is still angry that he has to work with Rubin, though his former best friend says that he loves and misses him. Chuy isn’t feeling particularly forgiving, and even mentions a time when Rubin stole his crayons when they were children. Probably the kind with the sharpener built right into the box. They may have been best friends once, but Rubin has taken enough from him.
While Roland fails to acquire new liability insurance, Rose chats up a lawyer (Steve Hytner, or Bania from Seinfeld). She convinces him to share a room with one of the judges, Mr. Angel, by offering a discounted room for the night, but the “Judges of Jacksonville” choose that moment to arrive for check-in. They are actually a terrifying biker gang, headed by the “Angel of Death.” Mr. Angel is happy to bunk with the much smaller lawyer, who is now threatening to take the hotel for himself should anything happen to him. Who could have foreseen such a turn of events?
That night, we find Blanche, Rose, and Sophia sharing a bed like the good old days. Blanche breaks the bad news about the insurance, and Sophia attempts to warm her frozen feet on the hot thighs of her bedmates. In the boys’ room, Roland will be bunking with Chuy while Oliver sleeps in a makeshift tent in preparation for a future of homelessness (I assume). Somewhere in another room, the lawyer and his new biker friend are singing a round of “Kumbaya.” We cut back to the girls to hear them lamenting the difficulties of the hotel business, but Rose gets the same idea as Oliver and decides to construct a tent to play camp, and Sophia offers to share a scary story: “The Day Dorothy Quit Smoking.” Meanwhile, the biker gives his new bestie the lawyer a tattoo.
The gang apparently pulls off their scheme, because for the final scene we simply cut back to the kitchen to find Chuy and Rubin working together. Rubin mentions that it’s his last night working there, and he makes a final plea for Chuy’s forgiveness, also giving him some brand-new crayons. In an act that will almost certainly be good for his own peace of mind, Chuy decides to forgive his friend…for the sake of the old Rubin that he remembers so fondly.
The End.
Well, I have to be honest, I didn’t really like this one. Both of the plotlines here were pretty boring and predictable, at least for me, and I honestly felt nothing between Chuy and Rubin. Drew let me know he had been under the impression that the guest role had been played by Tommy Chong (rather that Gregory Sierra), and I actually think that might have added some chemistry and made the relationship seem more interesting. But worst of all, I just couldn’t get past the “solution” to the booking crisis. Why, oh why, did the solution have to entail a lawyer rooming with a random stranger? If one shared room between guests was all that was required, as they suggested, then I’m sure that two of the lawyers knew each other, and I’m positive that all of the bikers were friends. Somebody would have taken the free room, and been perfectly happy to bunk with a pal! There was no need for this step aside from making a couple of jokes that didn’t even end up being funny! Anyway, I’m sorry gals, but the best I can give Ebbtide for the Defense is a rating of 2 poofy hairdos out of 5.
Drew will be returning soon with his take on The Living Daylights, the first outing of Timothy Dalton as James Bond, and then I’ll be back with a recap of Can’t Stand Losing You, the next episode of The Golden Palace. Until then, as always, thank you for being a friend, and for being One of Us!
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WELCOME TO JUKJEON, LIN HUAYU !
your place at dasol apartments 4B is all ready for you, we hope you enjoy your stay. citizens, let’s welcome our new neighborhood student and wedding planner intern !
HOW HAS JUKJEON BEEN TREATING YOU THE PAST 3 YEARS ?
jukjeon, as it is, isn’t what huayu’s expected.
that should go unsaid, especially mostly because the only reason he’s here is because of a stupid incident that’s inflicted permanent harm on him. otherwise, he would have remained amongst the bustling metropolis of china—but instead, he’s, well. here.
rendered useless.
it’s a bit bleak, he supposes. but despite the fact that some days it gets so bad to the point that he doesn’t want to get out of bed (doesn’t see the point in living) the days go on.
(time waits for no man.)
and that fact alone makes him push on, just that this time, not physically. fate always has a plan though, whether it takes a year or ten, and he believes it’ll get better. it needs to. but while he’s stuck here in an apartment that’s too big for his body, and left to his own devices to pursue his dreams in another manner, he figures—
why not make the most out of it while it lasts?
TELL US MORE ABOUT YOURSELF !
tw: homophobia, violence, bodily harm
“mr. lin.”
the shuffle of paper, and a piece is turned around for him to see.
“may i just ask—do you know why huayu… chose to depict his family in this way when he was asked to?”
it’s in red crayon, the typical jagged grass and stick figures in front of a house that every kid draws: there’s himself, his dog, his father…
and his other… father?
“i—“
they’re not smiling. stick-boy huayu’s face is scrunched into a frown, a big red cross drawn across their whole family.
伤心伤心伤心.
(unhappy unhappy unhappy.)
为什么他们都这么讨厌我们?
(why do they all hate us so much?)
“i-i don’t know.”
i don’t know either, huayu.
ON YOUR MARKS,
“hey.”
he keeps his head ducked down.
“hey, fucker, we’re talking to you.”
brisk, brisk, brisk, arms clamped stiffly by his sides in an attempt to get away.
he fights the urge to sprint away.
“hasn’t your father taught you any respect?”
(away away away away away)
“oh, oops. probably not. especially since he’s fucking that other man—your diedie, is he? every other night.”
freeze.
and he sees red.
/
“i expected better of you, huayu.” his voice is disappointed, heavy. it weighs down on his tiny shoulders, an act done that’s beyond than his understanding (for now). all that’s keeping him from collapsing is his father’s gaze that pins his feet to the ground. “i can’t believe you did that.”
(which is worse: the fact that he doesn’t feel remorse or that he should?)
“but- baba, they said…”
“i don’t care what they said. huayu, you can’t just. go around hitting people because they said something you didn’t like! do you know how angry that boy’s parents and your teacher were? they told me that—“ silence. his father breaks off abruptly and swallows, words snagging on his teeth. “well. they told me- they told me some things.”
(this is no way to bring your child up, mr. lin. i’m sure your… lifestyle, is impacting your son negatively, whether you realise it or not.)
the fight drains out of him, and only exhaustion stays as a residue. “the point is, huayu, just. don’t engage in violence, okay? no matter what people tell you. they don’t understand… us.”
(but baba, that’s not true. we’re as normal as anybody else.)
that night, huayu laces up his shoes, and runs.
/
running is all he seems to do these days, apparently.
figuratively and physically.
it doesn’t matter though, because it lands him a place somewhere, even if it’s just a place on his middle school’s track team. it’s a step up from his usual reputation as a hidden shadow, at least.
it allows him to be seen.
/
left, right, left, inhale.
here comes the blinding gold of medals and trophies that huayu’s showered with, recognition after recognition after recognition.
it’s already a steady pattern that he’s used to, a constant thrum of energy that settles in his bones and serves to push him further. (the only rhythm he’ll allow himself to settle into.) his limbs burn and his lungs are desperate, but he thinks that it’s worth it. it’ll always be.
(“you ever thought about going pro, kid?”
“…no?”
“well, you should. you’re still young, but with the way you run—it’ll take you places.”)
for the first time, huayu lets himself fall in love.
GET SET,
high school comes round in a flurry of glory.
the track is practically his second home, the red gravel a sort of solace in itself. it’s where he runs, runs, and runs, and doesn’t look back.
and take him places, it does. he’s offered a full scholarship for his times, makes the nationals. said that he’s good enough to represent the country, even, if given the time. for a small boy, huayu has big dreams (and for once he lets himself dream).
maybe it’s not a big deal. he’s just running (from his problems, from the track, from life), but it makes him, him. or—he’s afraid to discover who he’d be without this, something he’s actually good at, something he cares about.
he hides it behind a mask of pride, though, withering smile directed at his teammates who only ever offer their graciousness. but huayu is not gracious, or kind, to the world that has never once been that to him. why begin now? and so he wears his medals around his neck, head lifted high, and tries to convinces himself that he is the best.
(he’s not.)
but.
this is the happiest he’s been in a long while, and he hold it close to his heart.
/
“is there something you don’t believe in?”
(Him. for if He existed, huayu’s parents would have had an easier fucking life and they wouldn’t be condemned. He’d have provided the refuge that they sought instead of the constant harsh disapproval they were faced with. huayu would be happy. He would have saved them.
but He didn’t.)
maybe huayu isn’t the nicest—or even remotely decent—human, but who’s to say that of him? (karma) why can’t he get away from being unkind when everyone else can? (because.) is he going to regret being truthful? (yes)
so huayu says, simply:
“god.”
/
“god, you never learn your lesson, do you?”
this time, he has no savior. instead, envy claws at him with extended talons and tries to rip him into shreds. it comes in the form of a group of boys, almost a reflection of the same incident years ago.
this time, envy is armed with sticks that will actually break his bones.
“what makes you fucking think you can just come in here thinking that you’re all that? you think you’re that good, huh? when we’re done, no college will even fucking spare a glance at you.”
six to one, and it’s obvious at a glance that huayu’s as good as finished. give up? notan option. more like,
#1: violence (and disappoint all the people that’s ever mattered to him once again)
#2: back down—pride pride pride
#3: (…run?)
(he’s been running away his whole life.
but maybe, this time he can’t.)
there are no shoes to lace this time, no arguments to sprint away from. all huayu can do is lie there, body curled into himself, as he bleeds,
metal against bone, skin against flesh.
(he feels it on his arms his backs his legs— and oh god his legs—)
crack!
/
his world
crashes
down.
/
he was right. no decent sports university spares a glance at the boy with the crippled leg, previous agility now reduced to a pathetic limp.
a shattered tibial plateau, huayu’s told.
do you want to press charges?
and he should,
he should.
but maybe—he had it coming.
/
“yes, dad, i’m doing fine. no, i’m not dying— i can take care of myself! no i’m an adult—hello, ba—i’ll be alright, jeez. and yes, i’ll visit soon, don’t worry, okay? yeah, see you, love you both. take care.”
he hangs up, and the sudden quiet of his apartment instantly swallows him whole with the absence of his parents’ constant chatter in his ear.
he’s lonely and fuck, he misses them. but guangzhou doesn’t have a place for him anymore, and he’s moved from seoul to jukjeon in search of a quieter place to settle down. maybe planning weddings (even as an intern) is a rather odd job he’s found himself in, especially for someone who doesn’t believe in any sort of happy ending.
(he hates to admit it, but he lies in wait for someone to prove him wrong.)
it still pays him, though, and at least aids him in the cost for his tuition at dankook.
it’s far from what he’d imagined himself at in this point of time—star athlete, rough edges, an infinite youth on hand, but instead here he is—struggling, recovering, and not enough time. never enough time.
he’s coping, though.
there’s still a lot for him to learn, and some days it tires him out. if anything, does he really deserve his situation now? he likes to think he does, as a sort of consolation (not much). and all he wants to do is—
(left, right, left, exhale—?)
and yet, maybe he learns that he can’t always keep running anymore. maybe, maybe all he needs is to be kind to the world before it’s kind to him.
GO!
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