Surface Pressure, but it's sung by Ragatha
I'm a rag doll
I'm not nervous
I'm the glue that can bind this whole circus
Always helpful
I'm supportive
And I glow 'cause I know what my worth is
I don't wonder
What the point is
I remind you to stay optimistic
Hug me and squeeze me
And life will be easy
I help you keep living
I work with what's given
But
Under the surface
I'm feeling faint as
The dried out layer of an age old canvas
Under the surface
Would it be wrong to ask
"Hey, can someone else take this?"
Under the surface
I'm pretty sure it's hopeless
This nightmare will be endless
My mind's gonna crack
I feel an attack
The car's gone off the tracks!
What makes you go abstract?!
It's pressure like a drip, drip, drip
That'll never stop (whoa)
Pressure that'll tip, tip, tip,
'Til you just go pop (whoa-oh-oh)
Hold on to your dolly
Your dolly comforts
Things will be okay if you stick close to her
Who am I if I can't run with the ball?
If I fall to-
Pressure like a grip, grip, grip
And it won't let go (whoa)
Pressure like a tick, tick, tick
'Til it's ready to blow (whoa-oh-oh)
Hold on to your dolly
Your dolly shields you
From the looming horrors that would conceal you
Who am I if I can't carry it all?
If I falter
Under the surface
I hide my nerves
And it worsens I worry something is gonna hurt us
Under the surface
My thoughts take a turn
On what I could've done to deserve this
Under the surface
I'm not sure I can take it
Could there still be an exit?
Just tell yourself your fine
Rain falls from the sky
You try to keep on breathing
But the water's way too high!
But wait
I contemplate
If it's too late
For restoration
For the things I knew once were real
My obligation
To stay together
Will always fester
This growing pressure
Keeps growing
Keep going
'Cause all we know is
Pressure like a drip, drip, drip
That'll never stop (whoa)
Pressure that'll tip, tip, tip
'Til you just go pop (whoa-oh-oh)
Hold on to your dolly
Give her your burdens
Never think about how much she might be hurting
Hold her tight 'til her seams begin to break
She's okay
Just pressure like a grip, grip, grip
And it won't let go (whoa)
Pressure like a tick, tick, tick
'Til it's ready to blow (whoa-oh-oh)
Hold on to your dolly
I can assure it
You won't be the one who has to endure it
Who am I if I don't have what it takes?
No cracks
No breaks
No mistakes
No pressure
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On the Doctor and companionship
I am currently rewatching season 2 of modern Doctor Who while also watching the 60th anniversary specials, and what devastates me about the Doctor is that they never allow themself to get too close to anyone in fear of losing them ("that's the curse of the time lords"), always changing topics or running off with someone else when things get serious.
But when it does happen and they lose someone (Doomsday, End Of Time, Angels Take Manhattan, to name a few...) they are left utterly devastated and heartbroken anyway.
Because you can't stop yourself from caring about someone by denying yourself to be vulnerable and close with them. All that does is denying yourself moments of joy in between moments of loss and loneliness.
And for all the thousands of years the Doctor has travelled the universe, they still don't get that. They still deny themselves that happiness, probably as punishment for some thing or other, and it breaks my fucking heart.
In the 60th anniversary specials we (finally) get a little bit of the Docter letting Donna in (or rather, her persisting and reading the Docter like an open fucking book), but in the moment the Doctor has been most open and vulnerable with her, telling her they missed her, even looking for physical affection, it turns out they were decieved and it was an impostor talking to them!!!
We get to see the Doctor letting out their frustration over that, perhaps for the first time, in a moment where there is no one around to fool or pretend in front of. (Cue me crying my eyes out)
In conclusion: someone give that daft alien the biggest hug imaginable and force the Doctor to let themself be loved.
Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
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