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call-memissbrightside · 1 year

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a continuation of this one-shot

warnings: mentions of cheating, having an affair, bad-words, relationship insecurity, hints of NSFW, (Y/N) cries a lot but honestly I would too lmao

"If you think crying like this will make me want you, you're a fucking idiot."

You instinctively flinch, like Katsuki's words were physically hitting you. He notices your small movement from the corner of his eye, and moves so that his back is facing you to almost save you from the wrath he was unleashing on his ex-wife.

You weren't going to tell him what Ochako said to you. Because you knew it would cause trouble between them when that was the last thing you wanted. When accepting to marry the hero, you decided that no matter what, you wouldn't further cause tension between them. For Katsumi's sake.

Yet, it was Katsumi who told her father. Somehow she stole her mother's phone the moment they returned to Ochako's home across town and called Katsuki, explaining what she saw even if she didn't understand the whole story: mommy yelling at (Y/N) and making her cry.

Katsuki didn't hesitate to immediately coming home when receiving the distressing call from his own daughter, and scared the absolute crap out of you when he seemed to pop out of nowhere and demanded to know what Uraraka said to you.

Seeing his anger made you submit all too easily, and he patiently listened to you tell him what happened through broken sobs and snot pouring from your nose as you tried calming down. Katsuki was upset that you were upset, and had the idea to hug you, comfort you but then his phone rang.

Now he paced the living room, half listening to excuses Uraraka gave him for being unnecessarily cruel to you. You watched him from the plush couch, hiccuping now instead of intensely crying.

"I'm getting the lawyers involved," He barked, cutting off whatever his ex-wife was saying. You shake your head, not wanting to cause more drama but Katsuki holds a hand up to stop you. Leaning more into the couch cushion, you bite on your lip as anxiety digs into you.

"Tell Katsumi I love her and that she's not in trouble for calling me. You better not punish her for doing the right thing. I'll be damned if my daughter gets in trouble for calling her own father, you fucking bitch." He leaves it at that, promptly hanging up the phone before Ochako could have a word in.

Katsuki tosses his phone down onto the coffee table and rubs his face groaning. You watch, silent, not knowing what to do or say.

Noticing your cheeks were still read and how puffy your eyes became from crying, Katsuki cooed softly, "Come here baby, it's okay."

Holding his arms open, you immediately get up to let him hold you. Burying your face into his chest, you inhale his strong, expensive cologne. It works wonders to calm your racing heart.

"Let me see you, " Katsuki whispers, cupping your face gently so that you could look up at him. His red eyes burned like embers and seeing concern in them makes your bottom lip wobble so you bite it to stop from trembling.

"No, no," Katsuki lightly chastises, pulling your bottom lip with his thumb, tracing it lightly over the bite makes you gave yourself.

You still don't know what to say, but a broken, "Sorry."

Katsuki will have none of that, he scoffs and rolls his eyes, "No (Y/N), I'm sorry my ex is a fucking cunt."

You're still sensitive, and hearing him say something that cruel makes you flinch.

"Don't call her that Katsuki, she is still Katsumi's mom." You're careful on correcting him, knowing he doesn't like it when you do that.

Katsuki sighs loudly, you feel him inhale and exhale. Looking back down at his phone, he looks almost annoyed. "She is, huh?"

Turning back to you, Katsuki can't help but admire how you look at him with your full attention, like you can't help but hang onto his every word. When he leans down to kiss you, it starts off slow and sensual. His tongue dominates yours and you completely relax against him, getting lost in his kiss.

"You think all that shit 'chako said was true?" Katsuki mumbles against your lips. Your eyes were closed and they stayed closed, but your eyebrows furrowed at his question. You don't respond.

"You wouldn't have cried that hard if you didn't think it was true."

He knows he's right. You know he's right. But you continue not to say anything, embarrassed to be so quick to lose trust in your husband from one simple conversation. Katsuki looks at how how your face begins to crumble, and is hurt from your hesitance.

"Look at me baby," He demands, and a smile almost graces his face when you listen to him. Fingers that were threaded in the hair by your neck tightened, making your neck snap up.

"None of that shit Ochako said was true." Katsuki looks straight into your eyes and you knew he was telling the truth. A weight that you weren't even aware of seemed to be lifted from your chest, and you almost wanted to begin crying from relief. But you don't, because you knew that would only irritate Katsuki further.

"Do you regret marrying me Katsuki?" You finally ask.

He really didn't have to marry you. You sure weren't expecting him to when the affair was leaked to the press, and after Ochako announced their divorce in a press statement. That was hell for you, when the whole world learned you were sleeping with Japan's #2 hero, who was married and a father. It hurt even worse when people realized you were the babysitter, like you purposely broke up the Bakugou family for your own personal gain. That wasn't true, it just happened and yes, you felt horrible about it but also you and Katsuki were real. No one, absolutely no one, wanted to hear your side of the story. Their minds were made up.

You lost everything from having an affair with Katsuki Bakugou.

Your parents were so disappointed, they cut off all contact with you. You had to drop out of college mid-semester after getting harassed by your peers. Fans of Katsuki would throw things at you when you'd walk through campus. Coffee, paint, condoms. Uravity fans were even worse, calling you all the horrible names in the book: slut, whore, home-wrecker, gold digger. They bullied you online constantly, and you had to take down all your social media pages because it got so bad. And when your phone number got leaked online? You almost went mad with the countless calls and messages from trolls that you broke your phone just to have peace. You were broke because no one wanted to hire you, especially not as a nanny.

You truly thought that Katsuki would end things during that time. He would only call you from a new, secure phone his assistant dropped off at your dorm, hearing you cry about all the things people had done and all the names they called you. It was a while before you got to see him again in-person, due to his publicity team deeming it appropriate to wait it out until the divorce was settled.

You didn't think Katsuki would stick around. You already cried and yearned for him when under the impression that he'd leave you. Sure, the relationship started with just hot sex. But you liked to believe that there were moments when you saw the real Katsuki, the one who was kind and gentle with you, the one you loved. God, after all the shit you endured because of him, you still loved him. That's what made it hard to finally see him, because you convinced yourself he was only asking you out to break things off with you completely.

Yet, when Katsuki went down on one knee and asked you to marry him, you burst into tears and said yes before really thinking about it because you were just glad he loved you and chose you.

It all happened so fast, too fast and you were slowly cracking under the idea that all of this was a mistake.

Katsuki laughs.

He fucking laughs. Whatever vulnerability you felt comfortable sharing with him is locked away in your chest.

"Fuck you!" You yell, pushing at his chest but there's no way you're getting away from him. Not if he didn't want you too.

Katsuki kisses you silly, and only pulls you back when you try to speak up.

"Stupid woman," He whispers against your lips. "I must be a bad husband if I have you thinking I regret ever choosing to be with you."

He's smirking now, thumbs tracing the underlying of your jaw.

"Go to the bedroom and wait for me, and I'll show you just how much you mean to me."

Your body heats up at his words, and he finally lets you go. Katsuki was never much of a talker, but rather liked showing how he felt. You knew you would never get a full explanation from him on what or why he decided to marry you, but you body ignited at how he would explain in the bedroom.

Yelping at the feeling of his hand swat at your behind when you turn to head towards the bedroom, Katsuki laughs out loud again.

Checking his phone as he grabs his hardening cock in his pants, his eyes look over the countless messages and emails notifications to see if any need his attention immediately.

Assistant Hana: when will you be back?

"Katsuki!" You yell from the room.

"Be there in a few, calm down!" He yells back, texting a quick message.

Bakugou: i got important business to deal with at home

A/N: I was going to continue the angst but surprisingly i decided to go with a 'happy' ending. i'll probably make more one shots using this storyline, keep a lookout for them.

#bnha bakugo katsuki #katsuki x reader #bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki #bakugo katuski #bnha bakugou #bakugo katsuki #bakugou x reader angst

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svsss-fanon-exposed · 5 months

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Exposing SVSSS Fanon: 10/∞

SHEN QINGQIU HAS GREEN EYES

Rating: FANON - CONFLICTING

It is extremely common, to the point of being the default, to see Shen Qingqiu depicted with bright green eyes.

His canon eye color, however, is black:

It was a fine-featured face with pitch-black eyes and brows, thin nose and lips, and a most scholarly air. (7 Seas, Ch. 1)

and

Black eyes painted like stars swelled with dewy ripples as their focus blurred, tired and drowsy, his spirit like dying embers. (7 Seas, Ch. 29)

Portraying SQQ with green eyes directly contradicts the novel.

I am not entirely certain of the original source of this fanon, but it may be some sort of progression from the grey color of his eyes in the donghua, or perhaps an attempt to color-code with his attire.

However, it was almost certainly widely popularized, like Luo Binghe's curly hair, with the cover art of the official EN translations. Regardless, green-eyed SQQ is not only not canon, it is confirmed false by canon, and should thus not be seen as the default.

Shen Qingqiu canonically has black eyes.

#fanon exposed #conflicting #svsss #shen qingqiu #sqq eye color

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punkshort · 5 months

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look what we've become - ch.6

Chapter Summary: You arrive at Ellie's family's house, but it's not what you expected.

Chapter Warnings: language, mentions of child abuse (not SA), mentions of slavery, angst

WC: 6.3K

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Ellie was quiet the next morning, picking slowly at her granola bar and bent over, staring at her book. It was the day you expected to arrive at her aunt and uncle's house, and you had a hunch she was feeling bittersweet about it. When you woke up, you had a pit in your stomach that you assumed had something to the conversation you had with Joel the night before, but as the morning wore on, you realized there was a different reason. You weren't ready to let Ellie go.

"Hey," you said, nudging her knee so she would look up. "You excited to see your family?"

"I guess," she said with a shrug. Joel appeared to only be half listening as he nursed his coffee across from you.

"I'm sure they'll be happy to see you," you replied. "They probably don't even know you're alive. You said you were taken from their house, right?"

"Yeah," she said with a nod. "After my parents died, they took me in. I can't really remember much, but I know it was nighttime and I had a bag over my head, but I don't remember them breaking into the house, I must've been asleep."

"And it was the Fireflies who took you?" you asked.

"I'm not sure. It wasn't Marlene's group, if it was. There was more of us, they kept us all in this gross basement or something. No one could tell where we were, and whenever they moved us, they had the bags over our heads."

"Jesus," Joel muttered to himself with a shake of his head.

"How do you know it wasn't Marlene?" you asked gently, curious to learn more, but worried about upsetting her.

"Because after a few months, they took me and a couple others to Marlene's camp. She never made us wear the bags," Ellie explained.

"They hurt you?" Joel asked. His eyebrows were pinched as if he were bracing himself.

"A little," she admitted quietly. Your gaze dropped down to your hands, trying not to show her the emotion on your face. "They'd hit us if we weren't working fast enough, or trip us just for fun, I guess."

"I'm so sorry, Ellie," you whispered, reaching out a hand to place on her knee.

You exchanged a pained look with Joel before dropping the subject. At least she was going back home. She might not be excited yet, but you were willing to bet she would be once she saw her family again.

"We're doing the right thing," you murmured to him when you were out of earshot as Ellie packed up her belongings. "I know you weren't on board with this at first, but we're giving her a chance at a decent life."

"Second we get back I'm tellin' Tommy we are cuttin' all ties with these people," he said through gritted teeth. "I don't care what they got to offer."

You nodded, feeling the anger rolling off of him as he aggressively folded up his sleeping bag. You grabbed your pack and kicked dirt over what little fire remained, snuffing out the embers before reviewing the map once more.

Thankfully, her family didn't live within the city itself. Cities were heavily populated, which meant more risk of infected, soldiers, or hostile people. You tended to avoid them at all costs. They lived in a small town outside of the city called Morristown, which didn't have much outside of a post office, a school, and a fire department. The residential homes were built far apart from each other, scattered and disorganized. You got the feeling that people who used to live in this town knew everyone's business, it was so tiny. And you also had the feeling these were the types of people that shot first and asked questions later, given the extent it appeared they went for privacy.

"That's my school!" Ellie said excitedly, pointing down the street. Joel was focused on the map, trying to find the way to Spirit Drive, but you twisted your head so you could see the building she pointed out in the distance.

"That's cool, Ellie," you said warmly, happy to see she finally had a small smile on her face. "What was your favorite subject?"

She went on to tell you about her art class and a teacher she adored, and all the while you stared at her, listening to her stories while your heart ached. You imagined her in that school, with her friends, playing sports, eating lunch, and something inside you burned. It almost felt like jealousy, but that didn't make sense. It was a feeling you couldn't put your finger on, but you thought you knew what it was when you turned down her street, swallowing the lump in your throat when the realization set in that you were minutes away from never seeing her again.

"This the place?" Joel asked Ellie, squinting his eyes between her and the map. The house didn't look like much. It was a small, brick ranch with a long, gravel driveway that led up to a dilapidated grey barn. The hinges on the storm door to the front house were originally black, but now orange with rust. White paint chipped from the door in long strips, and the front garden was long abandoned and overgrown.

"Yeah," she said, looking at the barn.

"Do you think they're still here?" you asked, a flicker of hope igniting in you. Maybe if they weren't here, you could convince Joel to take her back to Jackson.

"Oh, yeah. They're here," she said confidently. You both glanced down at her.

"How're you so sure?" Joel asked, and she tilted her chin up towards the corner of the house. You both followed her gaze, noticing the cameras for the first time. They were small, it was no wonder you missed them, but they were there and definitely working. You could see a little red light flashing in the lens when the camera swooped across the lawn and over the driveway, where you all stood.

Joel slowly flicked his eyes around the house, counting at least seven cameras that he could see from his position. Then his gaze traveled to the barn, where he thought he could make out at least five more.

"How in the hell did you get taken from this place with all these cameras?" he asked. She didn't reply, and he wasn't really expecting an answer.

"So, what do we do?" you asked Joel quietly. "Do we just go up and knock?"

Joel twisted around to glance at Ellie, but she wasn't paying attention. She fidgeted her fingers inside her long sleeves as she stared out across the wide open dusty, dirty land the house was built on.

"I'll go up and knock, you two stay back," he decided, wiping the sweat from the back of his neck before venturing further down the driveway. The sun was blazing, even more so in the desert with little to no shade. You couldn't imagine how uncomfortable Ellie must have been in her long sleeves.

"That's far enough!" a man's voice rang out. Joel stopped dead in his tracks, whipping his head around to try to locate the source. Then he saw movement. An older man with a scraggly grey beard and balding head emerged from the barn, aiming a rifle right at Joel. He held his hands up in the air, showing from a distance that he meant no harm.

"Is that your uncle?" you whispered, holding your hands up as well.

"Yeah, that's Uncle Dave," she said, but she seemed unbothered by the threat. In fact, she shoved her hands in her pockets as she waited for him to approach.

"We aren't lookin' for trouble," Joel called out as Dave slowly made his way closer, his eyes transfixed on Joel. "We're here-"

"Toss your weapons on the ground!" Dave ordered, readjusting his grip on his rifle.

"Okay," Joel said, nodding, and slowly reached around to pluck the handgun from the back of his pants with two fingers. He held it up and gently tossed it on the ground in front of him.

"You too, missy," Dave said without even looking at you. You followed suit, slowly removing your gun and tossing it on the ground at your side. When you were no longer armed, Dave relaxed a bit, letting his shoulder drop but still aiming the rifle at Joel's chest. He finally allowed his gaze to drift behind Joel, looking briefly at you before his eyes landed on Ellie. He hesitated and swallowed roughly before forcing out a harsh chuckle.

"Well, I'll be damned," he said, a slow smirk spreading across his face. "Junebug! Get out here, you ain't never gonna believe this!"

A rounder woman with glasses and tight curly blonde hair emerged from the barn behind Dave, a scowl painting her features as she walked forward, aiming a revolver at Joel. When she looked over and noticed Ellie, her expression changed. Her eyebrows shot up in surprise and she let her gun fall to her side.

"Ellie!" the woman cried out, trotting clumsily down the driveway towards you. You looked down at Ellie, expecting her to finally show some excitement, but she only offered them a pained smile.

"Hiya, Aunt June," Ellie said before being enveloped in a huge bear hug.

"Oh, my sweet girl! I thought I would never see you again," June said with tears in her eyes. Dave watched the two reunite from his position in front of Joel, the rifle now slung over his shoulder.

Ellie stepped back and introduced you and Joel to her family. She explained you were helping her and keeping her safe, and the two adults began to warm up to you after that.

"Please, why don't you stay the night?" June offered. "We'll make you dinner and give you a warm bed, it's the least we could do." Ellie turned to you and nodded, a genuine smile finally spreading across her face.

You felt Joel hesitate next to you, but you quickly accepted her offer, not ready to leave Ellie just yet. He gave you a sideways glance before giving June and Dave a tight smile and followed them into the house, only after picking up your weapons from the ground.

The inside of the house matched the outside. It was well lived in and dated, but it was clean. You glanced around the living room, noticing there didn't seem to be any family pictures around, just landscape art and a clock on the wall.

June gave you a brief tour of the small house and showed you their spare bedroom, where you and Joel left your backpacks.

"Why don't you help me in the kitchen, dear, and leave the men to their own devices," June said, her pink cheeks pinching into a smile. You looked at Joel, trying to read his expression. He gave you a quick nod, confirming he was comfortable with being separated, and you returned her smile.

"That sounds great," you told her.

Dave led Joel down into the basement, explaining along the way that he would be 'blown away' by his set up down there. Ellie had mentioned they were preppers, and based on the cameras, you had to assume the basement was remodeled to be a safe room or a bunker.

You helped June chop up vegetables while she kneaded dough to make chicken pot pie. Your mouth watered at the prospect of a home cooked meal.

"We've been traveling for over a week, eating mostly trail mix and rabbit. This will be wonderful, thank you so much," you told her.

"Of course, dear. It's no trouble at all. Ellie!" June called out. Ellie came around the corner, her sketch pad hanging limply at her side.

"C'mon, girl, you forget how to help out around here?" June asked, her brows furrowed for a moment before she realized how harsh she sounded. She turned to you and laughed, her features relaxed again. "Kids, you know?"

You smiled and looked back at Ellie to gauge her reaction. She seemed quiet and closed off, but you brushed it off, chalking it up to the long day.

June held out a butcher knife to her, and Ellie hesitated, her eyes flicking from her aunt to the knife.

"Auntie, please don't make me," she said, eyes wide.

"You know the rules, don't tell me you forgot now," she replied lowly. Ellie reached out a shaky hand to pick up the knife.

"What is this?" you asked, putting your hand out to stop her.

"Well, we need chicken for the chicken pot pie, don't we now?" June said sweetly, and you were beginning to feel like that ruddy smile of hers was a little fake.

"I'll do it," you said, stepping in front of Ellie, hand outstretched for the knife.

"Now, I appreciate the offer, dear, but Ellie understands it's part of her chores, right?" she said, narrowing her eyes at Ellie. She nodded slowly, her gaze drifting to the floor.

"She can chop the vegetables and I'll take care of the chicken," you told her, your tone becoming more insistent.

June's watery eyes wavered between you and Ellie as she weighed her options. You glanced down at the butcher knife in her red, flour covered hands, then looked back at her.

"I insist," you said darkly, dropping the fake pleasantries. June's gaze dragged up to remain locked on you.

"Girl's gotta learn to be comfortable with killing," she replied, but you reached out and snatched the knife from her grip before she had a chance to blink.

"That's alright, I could use some practice, myself," you told her, refusing to break eye contact.

The tension in the room was thick, even Ellie was shifting her weight, trying to make herself as small as possible. You waited for June to try to argue with you again or say something to Ellie that didn't sit right, but it never came. As if storm clouds passed, her eyes cleared up and she blinked at you, a smile spreading across her flushed cheeks.

"Well, then," she said, dusting her hands on her apron. "Coop's out back. Suppose we should thank our guest, right Ellie?" June said, raising an eyebrow at the girl. Ellie nodded and looked up at you.

"Thank you," she said quietly.

"No problem, kid," you muttered, giving June one last glance before heading out the back door.

"This here's an AK-47, got maybe six of these fuckers," Dave said, his fingertips grazing the weapon on the wall as he passed. "Just about anything you can think of, I probably got two of 'em."

For someone who hoarded weapons in an underground bunker, Joel would have thought the man would be a little more subtle. A little less eager to show a complete stranger his entire stash. But then again, men like Dave loved to show off. If they couldn't boast about it, then what was the point?

"Real nice set up you got here," Joel murmured, knowing the man was waiting for a compliment. Dave's chest puffed with pride before he opened a sliding door in the back of the basement, revealing a small room filled with different sized monitors, cameras all cycling through the different angles he had covering his property. Joel was wrong: he had way more than just the cameras he saw. They rotated to different views all around the outside of the house. He noticed the only cameras that were monitoring indoors were in the barn where he saw an old John Deere tractor and a pickup truck flash on the screen.

"Jesus," Joel whispered, taking a step forward, but still not entering the small room. "How the hell you manage to watch these all the time?"

"Ah," Dave said proudly, tapping his finger against his temple. "I got motion alerts. Sends out an alarm when I'm sleeping or taking a shit or whatever. Gets annoying, though. Mostly just birds or other animals, so I turn it off during the day. But sometimes... sometimes I get something good."

"Like us?" Joel said, and Dave laughed.

"Yeah... yep, exactly like you," he replied, trailing off as he stared at Joel.

"Y'know," Dave said after a moment, stepping back to shut the door. "There's folks around here who pay good money for things, if you're ever in the market to buy or sell."

"We don't got much, but we're doin' just fine," Joel said, beginning to feel uneasy.

"Nah, see, that's where you're wrong, friend," Dave replied, pouring two glasses of whiskey and handing one to Joel. "You do got somethin'."

Joel held the glass tightly, bringing it up to his lips and pretending to take a sip before setting it down. Something told him he should keep his wits about him. He raised his eyebrows at Dave, waiting for him to continue.

"That girl with you up there," he began, and Joel felt his stomach twist at the mention of you. "She would fetch you a fair price with the folks I know."

Joel froze, doing his damndest to not let his emotions show. The pieces were starting to click. He clenched his jaw and swallowed lightly before taking a deep breath.

"That right?" he replied, urging him to continue. He needed to get back upstairs, for the first time realizing you all might be in danger.

"Hell yeah. Medicine, food, weapons. I'm sure of it," he said with a click of his tongue. "I make one radio call and they could be here in two days."

"Hm," Joel replied, clenching his fists behind his back. "Lemme think on it, yeah?"

"Sure, sure," he said with a wave. "Don't think too long, though. One day, someone'll take her. It's just a matter of if you get to benefit from it or not, you get me?"

Jesus fucking Christ.

"Yeah," Joel said. "I get you."

Joel decided you weren't leaving his sight. He was relieved when June called down, letting them know dinner was ready, so he could make sure you were okay without making an excuse to leave and raise suspicion. A man like Dave with a whole arsenal at his disposal wasn't someone he wanted to tangle with. He had to be careful.

A cynical part of him wondered if he should be worried about the food, but he knew you helped prepare it. You were smart, you would have noticed if something was going on.

But when he climbed the stairs and locked eyes with you, he knew something was wrong. You didn't show it, but he could tell by the way your smile didn't reach your eyes.

He settled down at the table as you and June scooped out the meal on everyone's your plates while Ellie silently brought everyone glasses of water. When she set Joel's down, he tried to catch her eye, but she wouldn't look at him.

"Ellie, why don't you get Joel 'n me whiskies. You ladies want anything stronger?" Dave asked, tucking his napkin into his shirt. You shook your head and politely declined as you took your seat next to Joel, your knee purposely knocking against his under the table. He glanced at you, your lips pressed in a thin line as you looked down at your food, not wanting to raise suspicion but desperately wanting to warn him that these people seemed off.

"You know, I've been meaning to try that margarita mix we traded for last week," June said thoughtfully. "Ellie, let me show you how to make it." June waddled out of the kitchen and into the living room, behind Ellie. You heard their voices carrying over faintly as June instructed her how to make her drink.

"This looks great, honey. What's in it?" Joel asked, turning and giving you a pointed look. Honey. He never called you that. It got your attention, and you gave him a quick, curious look before you understood his underlying question. Is this safe to eat? Your gaze drifted back to Dave, who was watching the two of you talk.

"Just normal stuff," you told him. "Nothing special. Veggies, chicken."

His eyes bored into yours, trying to communicate silently with you. You figured it out. Something happened in the basement that worried him, the same way June's behavior worried you.

"Alright, let's dig in!" June said cheerily, entering the kitchen with a yellow drink in her hand. Ellie followed dutifully behind with two glasses of whiskey, placing them in front of the men before sitting across from you.

"This is great, Junebug," Dave told his wife after a few forkfuls. June smiled as she sipped from her glass. You and Joel choked down the meal, offering your compliments and thanks once again, while Ellie silently pushed her food around her plate.

"Not a whiskey man, Joel?" Dave asked, his eyes growing glassy from the drink he had in the basement and now his second one.

"It's just been a long journey," Joel explained, but took a small sip anyway. "Feelin' real tired, is all."

Ellie glanced up and looked at Joel, knowing full well he wasn't tired. In the short time she knew him, it was like pulling teeth to admit he was tired. She looked back and forth between him and you, trying to read your faces without being obvious.

"Quit playing with your food," June told her harshly, finishing up her margarita. "You should be so lucky to have a roof over your head and food in your belly."

Joel stiffened next to you but didn't look up from his plate, his mind racing, trying to formulate a plan.

"You know what? That drink looked good," you said suddenly. "Ellie, why don't you show me if you remember how to make it?" You stood up from the table and Ellie jumped to her feet to follow you.

"Bring me another, too," June barked as Ellie followed you around the corner to the bar cart in the living room.

"What the hell is going on here, Ellie?" you muttered quietly, picking up the margarita mixer and pouring it into a glass.

"It's how they always are," she whispered. "They aren't exactly good with kids, but it's fine."

"No, it's not fine," you whispered back, holding your hand out to keep her from pouring tequila in your glass, choosing to just drink the mixer, not wanting alcohol to dull your senses. You nudged her hand to make her pour a little extra tequila in her aunt's glass. "This isn't how you should be living."

"Well, I don't have much of a choice, do I?" she asked sharply before turning on her heel and heading back into the kitchen. You trailed after her, finding your seat next to Joel and taking a sip of the fake drink and trying to ignore the guilt. You had no idea how you were going to be able to leave her behind with these people.

You helped June clean up the dishes after dinner while the men filed into the living room. Joel had drank his first glass, but held up his hand when Dave offered a second, rubbing his eyes and reminding him how tired he felt. He needed to get you alone and get you the hell out of here, paranoid that Dave would call those people to do a "trade" for you like he was already suspecting happened originally with Ellie. What else would explain kidnappers being able to bypass his security system?

As if reading his mind, Dave asked "Think any more about what I told you downstairs?"

Joel yawned, trying to hide his anger by contorting his face.

"Lemme sleep on it, get back to you in the mornin', I'm beat," he said, hoping he wasn't laying it on too thick. If he was, Dave didn't seem to notice, the whiskey doing its job by keeping him oblivious.

"Alright now, Ellie. Time to get ready for bed," June said, her drink sloshing in her glass. "Say goodbye and thank you to your friends."

You could see the despair in Ellie's face. Trying hard not to cry, you wrapped her in a hug and whispered it will be okay in her ear before pulling back, swallowing hard. She was about to reach for her sketch pad when, much to your surprise, Joel suddenly leaned down and pulled her into a hug. Ellie also looked shocked, not sure what to do at first but eventually brought her arms up around his ribs. You thought you could see him whisper something in her ear, but it happened so fast, you weren't sure.

"Okay, off you go," June told her, and Ellie quickly walked down the hall without another word. You watched her go, tears threatening to spill down your cheeks.

You sat next to Joel, trying to appear interested in what her aunt and uncle were talking about, but you realized it didn't matter the more they drank. Joel's hand dropped on the couch next to you, grasping your hand and stroking his thumb over your knuckles. You looked up at him sadly as he tried to wordlessly say it's okay, I'll get us out of this.

After another hour, Dave stood to tend to the fire, stumbling in the process. June chuckled, her face redder than usual.

"Time for bed, old man," she teased, and he grunted in response, pushing a log around with the poker before straightening back up.

"Suppose you're right, Junebug," he replied. You could hear the alcohol in his voice, the way he spoke slightly louder and slower than usual.

"You two need anything, you just holler," June said, pushing herself off the couch. "Clean sheets are in the closet."

You and Joel stood, watching as they made their way slowly down the hall to their bedroom, June mumbling to Dave until their door quietly clicked shut.

You immediately swiveled around to Joel but he clamped a hand over your mouth, shaking his head. You nodded and he removed his hand, leading you down the other end of the hall to the guest room, and shut the door.

"Joel-"

He held his finger to his lips before he made his way around the room, checking the furniture and closet for any possible hidden cameras or bugs. When he was satisfied, he finally spoke.

"Don't get comfortable. When they fall asleep, we're leavin'," he whispered.

"We can't leave her here," you said, sweeping your arm towards the door.

"I know," he said, and you breathed a sigh of relief. "They'll sell her off again the first chance they get."

"Wait, what?" you asked, eyes wide. "I thought someone snatched her?"

"I really fuckin' doubt it," Joel said, running his fingers through his hair. "When we were in the basement, that asshole was tryin' to convince me to sell you to slavers. Said if I don't do it, somebody'll take and sell you anyway. Sounded awful lot like a threat, if you ask me."

"Jesus Christ, Joel!" you whispered, wrapping your arms around your ribs and pacing nervously around the room. "So you think they sold Ellie into slavery? Their own niece?"

"Wouldn't put it past 'em. You should see the shit he's got in that basement. Must've cost a fortune. I'm sure Ellie wasn't the only one they sold off."

It started to make sense. The way June spoke to and treated Ellie like she was a servant didn't leave you feeling warm and fuzzy.

"But they seemed so happy to see her," you said, thinking back.

"Yeah, probably saw her as another paycheck. Two for one," Joel said with a scoff.

"So what's the plan?" you asked him, biting on your fingernail anxiously.

"Give it an hour or so," he began, sitting down on the bed. "Make sure they're passed out. Then, you go get the kid, and I'll go to the basement. I gotta figure out how to turn off the motion alerts on those cameras so they don't wake up. Then we get the fuck outta here."

"Okay," you said quietly, sitting down next to him, stunned. Twenty minutes ago, you just thought they were bad guardians. You had no idea it was this bad. You buried your face in your hands, feeling guilty for bringing Ellie back into this house. You should have fought harder to get her to stay in Jackson. Now, you all ended up in danger, anyway.

"We have to try to warn Tommy and Maria," you whispered. "What if something happens? It'll take us a week to get home."

"Maybe not," Joel replied. "I saw on his cameras that they got a truck in that barn."

Joel stuck his head out into the hallway, craning his neck to listen for any movement from the master bedroom. After a few minutes of silence, he looked back at you and nodded. Quietly, you followed him down the hall, pausing outside of Ellie's room. Before you could open the door, Joel put his hand over yours. He cupped your face and quickly pressed a kiss against your lips, then pulled back to look deep into your eyes while his thumb caressed your cheek.

I'll get us out of here, I'll keep us safe.

You nodded, understanding without him having to say a word. He dropped his hand and made his way down the hall to the basement door, clicking on his flashlight before descending the stairs.

Taking a deep breath, you slowly pushed the bedroom door open. You took care to close it gently behind you, then turned around to find Ellie fully dressed and waiting for you at the foot of her bed.

"Hey," you whispered, and she stood up, slinging her backpack over her shoulder.

"I'm ready," she whispered back.

"How did you-"

"Joel told me," she said quietly. "He said to keep my bag packed, and not to fall asleep."

So he did whisper something in her ear when he hugged her.

"Okay, good," you breathed, trying to hide your nervousness.

"I packed all new clothes, and a few other things I wanted. Do you think I need anything else?"

"You have your flashlight?" you asked.

"Yep. And I got this," she said, proudly reaching into her pants pocket and pulling out a switchblade.

"Where did you get that?"

"Does it matter?" she replied.

"Just be careful with that thing, put it away," you told her. She folded it back up and shoved it into her jeans.

You poked your head out of her door, making sure the coast was clear before taking a step out. You made it two feet before Ellie's hand shot out and grabbed your arm, pulling you back into her room just in time. The master bedroom door swung open and June hobbled out in her nightgown, making her way groggily to the bathroom. You and Ellie stood with your ears pressed against the bedroom door, listening intently as the toilet flushed and the sink ran.

"Where's Joel?" Ellie mouthed.

You pointed down to the floor and mouthed back basement.

You waited until you heard her door click shut and the squeak of the boxspring before opening Ellie's door again. Silently, you made your way down the hall and to the dark kitchen, where you waited for Joel.

"What's he doing?" she said as softly as possible.

"Motion sensors," was all you said back. She shook her head.

"He won't know - I'll do it," she replied, and before you could stop her, she opened the door and made her way down the steps, turning her flashlight on in the process. You went after her as quickly and quietly as you could, knowing Joel wouldn't expect you to be down there.

You entered the bunker, taking a second to gawk at all the guns adorned on the walls. There was also an elaborate looking radio and a workbench filled with electrical parts. You passed five dressers that looked to be filled with different types of ammunition, and you thought you even saw a couple grenades.

"Joel," you whispered, and you heard him shuffle near the back of the room. You swung your flashlight towards the noise, your heart pounding in your ears. He stepped out from behind a tall shelf of canned goods, shaking his head and holstering his revolver.

"This wasn't the plan," he scolded with a deep frown, but before you could explain, Ellie pushed past you both and made her way to the little room in the back that housed all of the security system equipment.

"Ellie!" Joel whispered, going after her.

"I know what I'm doing," she said over her shoulder. He glanced back at you and you shrugged.

"There, the alarm is turned off and so is the recording," she said, emerging from the room. Joel gave her a confused look.

"Recording?" you repeated.

"Yeah, the cameras record everything. So they won't know what direction we go when they wake up tomorrow and try to review the footage," she explained, looking at you like it was obvious before heading to the stairs.

"Did you know-" you began to ask, but Joel cut you off.

"Hey, wait," he whispered, making Ellie stop on the bottom step. He unscrewed the cap of whiskey Dave had shared with him earlier and poured it all over the radio, watching as it sparked a bit. And for good measure, he cut the wire that powered the device before making his way toward the stairs, pushing past Ellie to lead you both out of the house.

Joel led you to the barn, maneuvering on the soft grass instead of the noisy gravel. There was a standard padlock on the door, which he was able to break relatively easily with his hunting knife. He was beginning to realize Ellie's aunt and uncle had all the appearances of being survivalists, but lacked most of the skills. He had lost count of the things he would have done differently if he was defending his own home.

Still, he didn't want to wake them when he was so close to safety. So, he put the truck in neutral and had Ellie steer from the driver's seat while the two of you pushed the car down the long driveway, waiting until it reached the road before making Ellie move to the back and starting it up.

He drove for a few hours until you were both struggling to keep your eyes open, the adrenaline that was previously fueling you both long since worn off.

"Let's pull off here, maybe we can find some gas before we head out in the mornin'," Joel said softly, trying not to wake Ellie.

"Okay," you said quietly, staring out the window as he got off the interstate. He drove for another half hour until he found a volunteer fire hall.

There were a few abandoned cars in the large lot when you pulled in. Joel parked the truck and turned to you.

"Lemme go in and check it out, you stay with the kid," he said, unbuckling his seatbelt.

"I'll come with you," you said, but he held out his hand.

"Stay," he repeated firmly, and you shook your head.

"What if-"

"Just do as your told for once," he snapped. You clamped your mouth shut, too tired to argue. He was clearly annoyed that you improvised back at the house and brought Ellie in the basement.

"Fine," you seethed, and he slid out of the truck. You watched with your arms crossed as he approached the door, shining his flashlight inside the window before working on the lock and pushing his way in. You could see the beam of his flashlight through the windows as he moved from room to room, carefully checking out each one before finally coming back out to let you know it was clear.

"Ellie," you whispered, nudging her shoulder gently. Her eyes fluttered open and she sat up with a yawn, turning around to try to figure out where you were.

"We're gonna stay here for the rest of the night and try to get some sleep before hitting the road tomorrow," you explained as you hopped out of the truck.

She silently followed you into the building, where Joel was waiting, holding the door open. He led you both up the stairs where the firefighters had a small living space with bunk beds. Ellie snagged the first one she saw, curling up with the blanket that was already draped over the bed and falling back asleep.

"You good?" Joel asked, looking over as you flopped down on one of the beds.

"Yeah, are you?" you replied. He sighed and rubbed his eyes.

"Long fuckin' day," he murmured.

"Why don't I keep watch tonight and you get some rest, I'll sleep in the car tomorrow," you told him. You could tell he wanted to argue with you but his exhaustion won.

"Yeah, alright," he agreed after a moment.

You stood back up, checking your gun before heading back downstairs. After you peeked out the windows to confirm everything was all quiet, you wandered around the first floor a bit. It looked like after the outbreak, the building may have acted as a safe zone. There were abandoned bags, cots, blankets, and trash overflowing in the bins.

You were looking through some duffel bags for anything useful when you heard a noise outside. You froze, quickly pulling your gun from the back of your jeans as you made your way cautiously out into the room. At first glance, your flashlight didn't show anything out of the ordinary. You were about to give up when you heard the same noise again. Whipping to your left, you advanced towards the sound with your gun drawn.

The last thing you remember is a hand gripping your throat from behind and a needle slipping into your neck.

Tag List @nana90azevedo @ninaminaromina @untamedheart81 @taz-97 @nastiasnow @amyispxnk @plz-be-solo @iloveramensm @caitlynsixxx @anoverwhelmingdin @harriedandharassed @jessthebaker @txtattoostark @merz-8 @sarap-77 @sarahhxx03

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luvfy0dor · 3 months

Text

“Hands Under My Sweatshirt, Baby Kiss it Better ♡⁠˖” Fyodor Dostoevsky x GN!Reader ੈ✩‧₊˚

Warnings; BSD Spoilers, mentions of death, ch. 112 events, soft!fyodor

Description; Having a nightmare about your partner dying and waking up to him comforting you

A/n; i'm supposed to be doing a saq rn but I COULDNT NOT POST ON NEW CHAPTER DAY AHHHH I WANNA BE FYODORS MEDIEVAL HOUSE SPOUSE SO BAD IN EVERY LIFE TIME

ೃ⁀➷

Everything felt so real- you watched as your lover got into a helicopter with a briefcase containing an antidote, expecting a swift escape from Mersault only to be impaled by an iron rod. You watched as his eyes widened and his slender fingers wrapped around the pole. Blood trickled from both the new piercing in his midsection and between his lips while his breathing became shaky. He glared at another man in your dream who has been rendered faceless while speaking, although everything in the dream was silent so you couldn't make out any particular words or sentences.

The night terror didn't stop at your boyfriend being impaled, as a matter of fact it made you watch as the helicopter was messily flown directly into a tower and burst into flames with Fyodor still inside. You tried to hurry towards the aircraft, but it exploded before you could reach it. The blast didn't effect you, not scorching you or propelling you backwards at all, but letting you stand there and watch as all hope of getting Fyodor out of there shattered like glass. The crackling embers of fire surrounding you gradually became accompanied by a soft whisper-one that was all too familiar and thick with sleep. You were still in shock from the dream when your eyes snapped open, your legs curled inward with Fyodors chest to your back and his hand soothingly rubbing your side. "It's okay, Moya Lyubov, what happened?" He asks you, his eyebrows furrowed and his breath warm against your ear as he presses a chaste kiss to the nape of your neck. "Nightmare. You're...you're okay." You murmur, relief taking over your heart and mind. You rolled over, your body pushing his backwards a bit. "Ofcourse I'm alright. I'm not going anywhere, y/n, I promise. Was the dream about me getting hurt?" He correctly assumes, his tired gaze fixed on your own. "Mmm, worse, dying." You say, your heart finally returning to a steady pace.

"Ah, that makes more sense. You were very restless, you know." He tells you. "It's easy to tell when you have nightmares, you're like a dog. You make some distressed noises and kick your legs." He says with a grin. You sigh and close your eyes, pressing your head to his chest. "It's better than being stiff as a board though, 'cause that means you'll pick up on it and be all sweet and affectionate." You say. Your arms wrap around his torso like they would with a stuffed toy. "I'd say I'm rather affectionate regardless. You're just needy." He looks down at you and pushes your head out from his chest, kissing your forehead while his other hand slides up the back of your sweater and rests on the small of your back. You hum and twist the fabric of his tee-shirt between your pointer and thumb. "M'not needy." You roll your eyes and look up at him through your eyelashes. "If you insist." He says, closing his eyes and readying himself to delve back into a dreamless sleep. "Mhm..g'night, Fedya, I love you." You say, pressing a quick kiss to his lips that gets his eyes to open right back up. He kisses you back and smiles faintly. "Good night, Y/n, I love you too, sleep well." His arm drapes over your side with the blanket strewn messily over the both of you. Now you could sleep a little more peacefully with the reassurance of your lovers presence in your arms, and more importantly, his safety.

A/n; i speedran this tbh, so I'm sorry if it's not great. Also, would if I made like,,, a taglist would any of y'all wanna be on it because I see so many people do it and it looks cool but I've been too nervous to like say anything or ask bc I don't want people to be like "ew no wtf" THATS LITERALLY NOT GONNA HAPPEN BUT LIKE IDK I'm scared djsjjfjekekak

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val-cansalute · 8 months

Text

- EMBERS -

ch.3

content warnings: small amount of nsfw, 18+ (mdni)sub!reader x dom!ellie, strap r!receiving, finger sucking, scissoring. i’ve disintegrated. been dying at the hands of a cold for days. excuse the shitty writing. i actually despise this chapter. btw, this is the last one, BUT, theres gonna be a bonus chapter too. later. fingers crossed it’ll be better than this shit. banners by cafekitsune.

pt. 2

pt. 1

masterlist

The living room is dim, only illuminated by the lambent TV screen. It’s a harsh blue glow, one that makes your eyes hurt, but you don’t want to move.

For the first time in a week since the incident, you manage to bring yourself to leave your room, sit on the couch and watch a show. Or at least try to.

But this distraction isn’t enough. You can’t stop thinking about it, even just for one fucking minute. It has completely consumed you.

That day, when you laid back on the bed, Ellie had smiled down at you and it made those feelings you fought off for so long become, all of a sudden, almost tangible. And it scared you.

You know Ellie fucks around, know it more than you would like to, because you hear it late at night and it makes your bottom lip tremble.

She looked so beautiful, you almost felt guilty when you left her still figure behind, but you fucked up by giving in to your feelings. Now, you’re just like those girls she brings home on Saturday nights, the ones you never hear about again. It’s hard to accept.

Each of the seven days between that moment and this one, you’ve been doing everything in your power to avoid her. To call it difficult would be an understatement.

When her chest rose and fell gently, the soft hum of her breathing echoing in your mind, you left the dorm and went to spend the night with a friend. You sent Ellie a curt message. It was colder than it needed to be.

You: my friend called me over to watch a movie.

Dumbass: oh right i was wondering where u were

Dumbass: when r u coming back?

seen

The next few days were excruciating. You returned the next day, opening the door at the exact moment Ellie came out of her room. You closed it behind you, begging your face not to reveal how much you were struggling to seem unfazed.

She looked so good, standing there, rubbing her eyes lazily. She offered you a smile but you could tell it was hesitant. You pretended not to notice and walked to your room awkwardly.

Your stomach twisted when you shut the door, picturing her confused face. Hurting her made you feel like shit, but you knew she didn’t care about you enough to feel hurt.

You could tell she was thrown off by your behavior though, the eyes that met yours seemed insecure when she started making attempts to get you to talk to her.

A day had passed since and, in the evening, she stood in your doorway as you pretended to study, her stance indicating she was slightly unsure of herself as she watched you.

“Hey…”

You turned to look at her for a split-second, immediately regretting it when your eyes met hers and turning back to your desk.

“… Wow, you’re studying again…”

“Mhmm,”

She chuckles to herself; you can practically hear the cogs turning as she comes up with something to say.

“Uhhh… Well… Careful there, I can see your head expanding… by the second.”

Normally, though it's embarrassing to admit, a dumb dad joke like that would've made you giggle, but you were too deep in your thoughts to find anything funny.

Ellie left after standing in discomfort from your lack of a reaction. Just a few days ago, she would've poked and prodded till you were seconds away from slapping her. Not today. Everything was wrong.

But it was hard to keep avoiding her when, somehow, she managed to come out of her room at the exact moment you came out of yours, over and over again. She never ignored your presence either, handing you things she thought you'd need as you cooked in silence. It had to be a hazard to use a stove with your hands shaking like that.

Every now and then, she'd chuckle to herself while watching you and tell you a dumb pun she remembered hearing. You didn't respond; you felt like shit and you hoped the food you'd left for her wordlessly would let her know you weren't mad at her. Because you weren't, you were just mad at yourself.

Wednesday was rough.

You were cooped up in your room, too scared to use the kitchen; you felt pathetic.

And it felt like she was reaching down your throat and squeezing your heart cruelly when there was a soft knock on your bedroom door in the afternoon.

“... Hey... You up?” her muffled voice carried past your closed door and you croaked out a quiet, "Yeah."

“You want something to eat?”

“...No.”

“... I know you haven't eaten all day.”

“I've got snacks in here.”

You heard her sigh as you pressed a shaky hand to your pounding heart.

“That's not... enough, dude.”

“Whatever, I don't feel hungry.”

There was silence for a moment and you winced at how harsh your tone came out but the sound of Ellie's footsteps getting further away gave you relief regardless.

Not too long after, Ellie was thumping her fist against your door and rattling the handle impatiently.

“Hey, asshole! Come play Mario Kart!”

“Not in the mood.”

“What? Don't you try to bullshit me; you're always in the mood for Mario Kart.”

You sighed and rubbed your tired eyes. You hadn't been sleeping well since you did it with Ellie. Late night brought on those thoughts. Those memories.

“No, not today.”

You heard her mutter “...Jeez,” as she walked away. This time, you knew she'd be back soon.

And she was.

“I wanna watch Shrek 2! Come on! I know you want to! ‘Better out than in, I always say. Eh, Donkey?’”

That Scottish accent made you cringe. For some reason, it was these kinds of things that made your feelings deepen. You're peculiar.

“No, I'm busy, Ellie.”

And then, again.

“You asleep? You better not be metamorphosing into a cockroach in there, okay?!”

With a sigh, “Yes, I'm asleep, Ellie.”

“It’s like your ghost lingers…”

Again.

“HEY! Hey, open the door, it's important.”

You don't, “What do you want?”

“Did you know that- that the velociraptors in Jurassic Park weren't even actual velociraptors, they were based on... like, Utahraptors? Like, that’s not even what they look like, dude.”

“… Okay.”

“Just letting you know.”

She stopped after that.

You snuck out of your room to get food but realized there was no need. She wasn't there.

She played her games and shows at full blast, shouting and laughing late through the night, let the dishes pile up in the sink, made the living room more and more disheveled each day, played music at unspeakable volumes in the shower, and made no attempts to speak to you.

You just let it be, because you couldn’t bring yourself to face her, even to reprimand her. You just sat in your room, hoping you could ignore these feelings till they went away but it proved to be harder than you ever anticipated.

So many emotions are weighing you down now, it feels like they're pushing against the confines of your skull, like your head's gonna burst.

And tonight is a Saturday night, so Ellie isn’t home. She left without a word, slamming the door behind her. She’s gone to some dumbass party to smoke weed. Then, she’ll come back cross faded with a girl you might’ve seen around campus a few times. You know her routine.

It makes your stomach ache.

You don't want to hear it- no, today, you can not hear it. You have no right to be upset, acting like she didn't even exist and like you weren't bothered by what the two of you did. You know that. But if you hear her tonight, you'll have no choice but to go. You feel pathetic. It happens a lot these days.

It's getting late, past midnight. If Ellie were to bring a girl home, it'd be around now. You squeeze your eyes shut, resisting the urge to smack yourself for thinking the thoughts that swarm in your mind.

Despite it all, you couldn't even tell yourself that having sex with Ellie was a mistake, because it felt so right in that moment.

You sigh and place your can of beer back on the coffee table in front of you, the bitterness that lingers in your mouth suddenly getting to be too much as you imagine what will unfold tonight. You're angry at her even though it doesn't make sense for you to be, huh?

Pushing through, you pat the space on the couch around you in a halfhearted attempt to find the remote, telling yourself you should probably go hide in your room before she gets back.

You hear it; the sound of her voice out in the hallway as she hums that song she was blasting in the shower earlier today. Now, you're frozen in place, watching the door swing open.

With the heartbeat of an animal of prey being hunted, you look back at the TV screen, too afraid to confront whatever you will inevitably have to confront tonight.

“Oh, you're not hiding in your room anymore, huh?” she murmurs, sounding almost as bitter as you, her words quiet and slow.

You find your hands moving on their own, grabbing the remote you were struggling to find and fumbling as you try to turn off the TV. “... I wasn't hiding. I don't know what you're talking about.”

“Fuck you.”

You throw your head around to meet Ellie's gaze. Her cheeks are rosy and her eyes are slightly bloodshot, but she's not drunk.

“Excuse me?”

She's alone. She came back alone. You can’t help but let out a shaky breath at the same time she pushes out a venomous scoff, mumbling some shit along the lines of my puns are fucking hilarious and doesn’t appreciate my fucking dino fun facts.

“That's the first time you looked at me in days. You're ignoring me, fuckin' asshole.”

You look down and shake your head; Ellie moves closer. So, you put the remote down and turn away to leave the living room.

“I told you, Ellie, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm gonna go to bed.”

“You better fucking stop pulling whatever shit you're pulling now.”

She grabs your wrist and looks you in the eye. You can smell it on her, the weed and the anger. That fucking addictive body spray she uses. And she looks so hauntingly beautiful in this blue light. Fuck. It's too much. You want to tell her to get off but the words die on your tongue; her expression hit you like cold water to the face.

Ellie looks sad.

“Why did... I thought… fuck... you can't do that... you're confusing me, you're being...”

Your eyebrows furrow in panic,

“Ellie... it was just sex, you... you have sex all the time. I mean, you usually bring someone over today, right? It’s not like it meant anything…”

She shakes her head, scoffing,

“That’s different. I dont know those girls. I don’t see them again. I know you; I see you every day!”

You’re caught up in the heat of the moment, huffing in frustration, not knowing what to feel, what to think.

“Well, I didnt think it was any different, I thought-”

Ellie shakes her head desperately, her voice cracking.

“Jeez, do I have to fucking spell it out for you? I have feelings for you! How can you not see that?… So, dont... fuck with me if you’re expecting me to act like it was nothing. Because, holy shit, it was something, and I can’t fuckin’ do that. I’m sorry.”

The world stops spinning for a moment and you’re standing in front of Ellie with a bright red face and a pounding heart, feeling like a little girl.

“You have feelings for me?”

She stares at you as you sit back on the couch and wipe a stray tear, and then another, and another.

Fuck, you’re ruining the moment. It’s so dramatic and stupid to cry about it, you know, but your body is completely overcome with relief, washing away the intense feelings that have been swirling in you the past week like a hurricane.

You’ve had feelings for Ellie since the moment you saw her, and they’ve only gotten stronger day by day. It was heartbreaking to see her so casually sleeping with other girls, and it was terrifying to think you’d become one of them.

“I’m so sorry, Ellie, I thought you thought it was just, like, meaningless sex. I was so scared you’d act like nothing happened, so I acted like it didn’t happen first, or something. It sounds so dumb now. Oh my god, I was such a bitch to you, Ellie, I’m so sorry-”

Ellie cuts you off as she brings your wrist up to her lips and presses a gentle kiss to the back of your shaking hand.

You look at her, your other hand gliding up her side and onto the back of her neck.

“You’re so pretty, Ellie. God, since I first saw you...”

You lean in and Ellie’s already on you, kissing you desperately, even more than the first time.

The two of you stumble back to your room, completely entangled, your hands roaming all over each other.

You’re on top of the sheets, moaning into each other’s mouths like you’re drunk, like your hands are moving on their own.

And your clothes are in a heap on the floor, discarded mindlessly as you tug on the waistband of Ellie’s jeans, hand slipping up her sports bra and circling her hard nipple gently before pulling it over her head and closing the gap between your mouths once more.

Her lips never leave yours as she shoves down her pants, fanning your face with hot, aroused breaths when you separate for air.

There’s a visible bulge in her boxers. The sight gives you feelings that travel straight to your core before your eyes meet hers.

She ducks and presses warm, gentle kisses along your collarbone; you can feel the smirk against your skin.

Her touch is electric, tongue gliding down your sternum, sending shivers throughout your body.

She mumbles, “I’ve been wearing it…” and kisses your right nipple, cupping your boob in her hand as she sucks it, teeth grazing the skin and tongue rounding it, before she pulls back with a pop. “Every day…” she moves to your left, doing the same, and your breathing picks up, your fingers tangling themselves in her auburn hair. “Since I fucked you.”

You can't hold back the soft moan that leaves your lips as you push your chest into her face, hips bucking against hers. Your cunt hits the bulge, nudging it against Ellie's clit and she squeezes her eyes shut with a groan before coming up and kissing you again, one hand holding your hip and the other interlaced with yours.

You chuckle against her as your nails gently graze the expanse of her back, “Always prepared, huh?”

Ellie's smile is breathtaking. It hasn't stopped making your heart flutter in a year. Everything feels warm, like home. You put your forehead against her's, exchanging hot, shaky breaths,

“Good, because I need it, Ellie, please.”

“Of course,” she whispers, and the nickname feels right now, no awkward pauses following. She kisses the tip of your pink-tinged nose and peppers more across your neck as she pulls down her boxers.

You feel the silicone against your slit and your eyes roll back, a quiet gasp escaping. It's warm this time, the product of Ellie's body heat. And then you feel the feeling your body's been begging for as she rubs it against you, covering it with your slick. Those little noises you're making and the way you're quivering- it's driving Ellie crazy.

Her eyes never leave your face, glazed and staring up at you from the comfort of your shoulder as the tip teases your entrance.

“Tell me if it hurts, babe, I’ll go slow.” She slowly pushes it in with surprising ease, listening to your quiet moans, and, now, she knows- knows you've been aching for it for days. You glance down and give her a dazed smile, inviting her to keep going.

Ellie pushes herself up, closer to your lips and mutters, “Shit... I'm gonna make you feel good, promise,” locking her swollen lips with yours, and starts slowly pushing it deeper.

You're breathing heavy, moaning into her mouth like you're on ecstasy as Ellie picks up the pace, bouncing her hips against yours rhythmically. Her soft groans are filled with pleasure as the strap rubs against her core. It get you excited.

You can feel your own pleasure build up, babbling incoherently. Ellie knows you're both so close, so soon, and, with her hand on your hip, the other stroking your cheek, her thumb slowly inches towards your parted lips and enters.

You're looking directly into her eyes as she whispers, "Suck, baby." Your cheeks flush a deeper red, unable to speak as the feeling washes over you, lips wrapping around it and sucking.

Ellie moans at the sight, she pushes her thumb deeper till it hits the back of your throat and you gag, starting to thrust into you faster and harder now. Your eyes are rolling back into your head.

The tears that pooled in the corners of your eyes - she wipes them away and brings the thumb to your throbbing clip, watching you writhe desperately when she slowly circles it.

Her lips quirk into a smile, thrusts getting more and more hungry.

“Love your pretty little face so much.”

“F-fuck, I'm close, Ellie,” you choke out, cutting yourself off with a loud moan, so Ellie fucks into you harder, through your seemingly never-ending orgasm, and not pulling out even when it's done.

When you calm down, you pull her closer and bury your face in her neck,

“I wanna make you feel good, Ellie… Fuck… Cum on me.”

Ellie groans, “You got a slutty mouth, huh? I fucking love it.”

She’s searching for more, hungry for more, to make you feel good. To feel good. And her hand traces the skin down your stomach to your cunt, eyes clenching shut when she feels it dripping in slick.

Like it comes naturally, she moves back, kneeling over you after gently raising your leg onto her shoulder, and bumps her wet clit against yours.

The friction is delicious, your hips lift mindlessly, sliding your cunt up on hers. The movement earns you another graphic moan from Ellie, that, and the wet sounds of your cunts against each other before she grinds against you, softly brushing a lock of hair out of your flushed face.

She watches your body move, mesmerized by the way is bounces as her hands subconsciously dart around to feel and grope, squeezing your tits hard, grinding ravenously.

She leans over your figure, pushing your leg further into your chest, and kisses you as she thrusts her hips against you desperately, like she's feral, the way she gets when she’s close. Her sweet moans mix with yours as your arms wrap tight around her neck. The peak is getting closer, and it looks like everything around Ellie’s eyes is blurred, melting into a pool of warmth that caresses you. It’s long and intense, the feeling of her cunt clenching against yours, the sound of her panting as she rides it out.

You cum into her as she cums into you, slick covering your sweaty thighs. You feel complete, grinning dumbly.

You still feel euphoric when you come down, still feel euphoric when she kisses your forehead and pulls you close in her embrace because it’s not just sex.

This is something. The something.

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