Princess Grace is escorted by Father Roland Melody as she arrives at a celebrity luncheon for the Catholic Office on Drug Education in Washington D.C., on April 25, 1973. The benefit affair was sponsored by the Variety Club of Washington.

( alexa  demie .  cis  woman .  she / her )  - the  new  york  city  resident ,  yesenia paloma  ,  was  seen  sporting  mugler  on  park  avenue  today .  the  thirty  year  old  is  a  musician / actress  in  the  city  &  has  been  here  for  thirty  years .  since  being  here  ,  they  have  been  told  to  be  aloof  ,  but  also  clear-headed ,  who  really  knows  !  according  to  nycslam  ,   yesenia slept with an officer to get herself out of a dwi charge  .  anyways  ,  guess  we'll  find  out  for  ourselves  !

⸂    𝐃𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘    ﹐ tba   ﹐ pinterest!         ও

𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐒

full   name :   ﹐ yesenia   paloma   romano   ﹐   nicknames :   yesi,   nia,   nini,   , yesmami   (social   media   handle)   ﹐   age :   thirty   ﹐   sexuality :   pansexual   ﹐   date   of   birth :   febuary   13,   1994   ﹐   place   of   birth :   nyc   ﹐   sex   &   gender :   cis   woman   ﹐   languages :   english,   spanish,   italian   ﹐   religion :   former   catholic,   spiritual   ﹐   education :   high   school   graduate   ﹐   occupation :   musician   and   actress   (ariana   grande   career-claim)   ﹐   drinks,   smokes,   &   drugs :  yes   to   all   three   socially.

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘

zodiac   sign :   aquarius   (sun   &   mars),   pisces   (moon,   mercury,   &   venus),   &   sagittarius   rising   ﹐   mbti :   isfj   ﹐   likes :   tba   ﹐   dislikes :   tba   ﹐   bad   habits :   tba   ﹐   hobbies :   tba   ﹐   fears :   tba   ﹐   five   positive   traits :   clear-headed,   observant,   insightful,   confident,   bright   ﹐   five   negative   traits :   aloof,   fickle,   escapist,   blunt,   spoiled   ﹐   five   neutral   traits :   flirty,   stubborn,   tolerant,   perfectionist,   dreamy   ﹐   other   mentionable   details : acute   cases   of   depression   and   anxiety,   randomly   bursts   out   singing,   rbf,   likes   to   sit   on   the   floor   and   in   weird   positions,   personal   aesthetic   doesn't   match   the   music,   always   in   sunglasses,   randomly   disappears   from   people   and   the   internet,   always   snacking   ﹐   aesthetics :  vhs   video   edits,   raining   diamonds,   smokey   eyes   and   running,   watching   her   phone   ring   and   still   not   answering   it. 

𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄

tattoos :   tba   ﹐   piercings :   ears   ﹐   faceclaim :   alexa   demie

𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐘 𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

ethnicity :   ﹐ mexican   and   italian   parent   names :   tba   ﹐   parent   relationship :   still   married,   okay-ish   terms   with   mother,   estranged   from   father   ﹐   sibling   names :   tba   ﹐   sibling   relationship :   tba   ﹐   other   relevant   relative :   n/a   ﹐   children :   none   ﹐   pets :   shadow   (black   cat)

𝐐𝐔𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐒

🎙️ˑ   yesenia's   a   full   blown   nepo   baby,   destined   for   fame   and   fortune   from   the   moment   she   was   conceived.   her   mother   is   a   famous   mexican   model   and   actress   while   her   father’s   an   italian   businessman.

🎙️ˑ   she’s   a   nyc   native   and   raised   within   the   wealthy   communities   of   manhattan.   she   went   to   private   and   prestigious   performing   arts   schools   throughout   her   entire   life   and   landed   a   gig   on   broadway   as   a   child,   hence   her   career   as   both   a   musician   and   actress.

🎙️ˑ   as   of   now,   yesenia   dropped   thank   you,   next   a month   ago   (feb   2024)   and   she's   been   on   euphoria   (2019-now)   as   maddy   perez. 

🎙️ˑ   it's   safe   to   say   that   yesenia   was   a   wild   child.   her   name   was   attached   to   several   scandals.   most   of   which   had   to   do   with   her   getting   drunk   and   embarrassing   herself   or   the   countless   people   she   was   dating   or   friends   with.

🎙️ˑ   she's   not   an   only   child,   but   i   haven't   figured   out   her   sibs   and   their   relationship   since   i   kinda   wanna   submit   a   family   connection.

🎙️ˑ   the   girl's   a   mixture   of   private   and   out   there.   of   course,   with   her   level   of   fame   it's   impossible   to   stay   out   of   the   limelight   for   long,   however,   she   regularly   disappears   from   the   face   of   the   earth   and   even   her   friends.   usually   this   is   a   sign   of   her   working.   now   whether   it's   personal   or   career   based   isn't   always   clear.   

🎙️ˑ   yesenia   paloma   is   both   her   stage   name   and   her   first   and   middle   name.   romano   is   her   actual   last   name   but   she   doesn’t   use   it   when   it   comes   to   the   industry.   at   first   it   was   to   distance   herself   from   her   family   as   she   didn’t   want   to   seem   like   the   nepo   baby   she   is   but   now   it’s   due   to   her   estranged   relationship   with   her   father.

🎙️ˑ   more   to   come.

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

your   basics   ...   best   friend   /   squad,   frenemy,   rival,   music   collaborators,   business   partners,   costars,   exes,   childhood   friends,   ari   x   pete   or   mac   inspo'd,   family   friends   /   chosen   family,   etc   .

adam doesn’t have much in terms of lore, but his general biography has a lot of implications that suggest there is much more depth to his story.

Adam was born in Rollington Town in Kingston, Jamaica. [...] His uncle was a strict, but fair man, who raised him to value education.

rollington town is not a town, so much as a small suburb in jamaica’s capital of kingston that connects to many other towns and municipals. only 4 kilometers (2 miles) from kingston’s tivoli gardens. considering adam's age is in his middle to late 30s, he would have been alive (probably young adult) during the violence that pervaded kingston under the control of the (government approved) drug lord and don christopher “dudus” coke and his gang, the shower posse, between 2001 and 2010. dudus is the son of jim brown: founder and original don of the the infamous shower posse political-gang, heavily affiliated with, at the time, the ruling Labour Party of Jamaica (right-wing conservatives).

because of his uncle’s guidance, adam was able to attend kingston college, which is essentially just blocks away from tivoli gardens.

At Kingston College, Adam discovered his father's published works, which triggered his passion for literature. His campus, however, was known for its focus on athletics.

kingston college is an all-male secondary college that is in fact famous for its various sports programs (as well as a world-famous boys’ choir). founded by the Bishop of Jamaica, at the time; “the school was envisioned as a remedy for the social deformity in which poor black boys were allowed primary education only. The school was created primarily to provide poor black boys, who otherwise would not have the opportunity, with a secondary education."

adam’s perk “deliverance,” also clues in on his experience in a private catholic college, seems to suggest he has strong beliefs in abrahmic monotheism, and this particular belief system/willpower grants him the advantage against the entity’s hooks.

the school’s motto is: “The Brave May Fall But Never Yield.”

At Kingston College, Adam discovered his father's published works, which triggered his passion for literature.

oku onuora was an anti-colonial activist and poet who formed a community school for the poor, and organized in rollington town, handing out the political newsletter abeng by walter rodney. he was allegedly arrested in rollington town for robbing a post office in an attempt to gather funds for the struggling youth center.

adam’s father would have likely witnessed the political violence that occurred during the cold war, against the CIA-backed conservative LPJ and the socialist PNP, both parties utilizing gangs and gang violence to influence voters. including assassination attempts against activists that were considered a threat to the LPJ party’s victory. it’s not unlikely at all that his father’s writings would have addressed the historic events and political strife of his time, like so many others.

but, instead of inspiring adam... it only made him cautious. haunted. conflict avoidant, unless absolutely necessary. and it was often necessary.

While his close friends orbited the music industry, he followed a surer path. His grades granted him admission to higher education, and there was a demand for teachers abroad.

it doesn’t feel like it’s a coincidence that they mentioned the music industry. cook owned a music label, presidential click, which used music as thinly-veiled propoganda in favor of the shower posse. cook would regularly fund concerts that helped bolster his cult personality among kingston’s denizens and beyond.

education was the “surer” path primarily because it was the safer path. ultimately, as adam grew older and learned to avoid conflict/survive the culture of male violence indoctrinating kingston’s youths, other boys did not. too many boys.

It's during his years in college that he started to imagine his life elsewhere. [...] he managed to apply for a position abroad. His first plane ride took him to Southern Japan for a new start.

why japan, in a small southern township? why not somewhere in the americas, which was closer and didn’t require him to learn a new language?

because adam is glaringly aware of the inherently sinister nature of western governments interfering in the affairs of other countries, and imagined it was not much better living in the wolf’s den. as a “first-world” country, japan has some of the strictest gun control laws and lowest violent crime statistics in the world.

adam, like many caribbean migrants, felt forced to leave their home in order to gain better opportunities and feel safe. live in peace.   

lastly, the writers for dbd’s lore write analogies and outright references to historic wars and crimes committed by the u.s. government/CIA, specifically the vietnam war (ghostface’s tome), the cold war/korean war (jake’s tome), MK ultra (the doctor’s tome), etc..  so it’s not impossible to assume adam’s backstory follows this narrative theme. specifically, the u.s. govt/CIA is directly responsible for much of the poverty and violence that raged in jamaica (and various other islands/nations) for decades.

all things considered, adam is clearly a strong-minded individual with intense moral values. he does not trust the u.s. military, govt and any associated groups. but he is familiar with coordinated violence, and steadfastly defending himself against aggressors.

Profile of a Killer: Robert Berdella

Warning: Extremely Graphic Depictions of Sexual Violence

Early life

Born in Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, Robert Berdella was the first of two sons born to Robert Berdella Senior and Mary Berdella. Born with a speech impediment and vision issues, Robert was raised in a strict catholic household, regularly going to mass and religious education courses. Due to health issues, Robert was forced to sit out on athletic activities whereas his little brother showed an aptitude for many different sports. Due to his father viewing sports and athletic activity as a sign of accomplishment, Robert was always viewed as a failure. When Robert reached puberty, he realized he was homosexual and kept it a secret from his family; Robert briefly had a girlfriend in his teenage years. After his father passed away in 1965 from a heart attack, he sought religion as a place of comfort. He read extensively on all types of religions but later became cynical towards his faith. Shortly after, Robert saw the film 'The Collector,', a movie based around a woman being held captive in a basement by two men; he later claimed this was the driving force towards his own Modus Operandi.

Making of a monster

In 1967, Robert graduated from high school and enrolled into Kansas City Art Institute;  at first he was known as a dedicated, attentive student. However, he soon became involved in selling drugs to students at the college. In two known incidents, Robert tortured a duck and a chicken in the presence of his peers and tested tranquilizers on a dog. By the age of 19, he made a name for himself with the Johnson County police department after being arrested for selling methamphetamines to an undercover officer. A month later, he and another student were arrested for possession of marijuana and LSD. Shortly after, Robert left the institute when he was criticized by the Board of Directors for hurting animals.

Beginning of the End

Known by his neighbors as a helpful and flamboyant man, he became immersed in the community surrounding his home by helping a local crime prevention association; he later became chairman of the local neighborhood watch. After moving into his home on 4315 Charlotte Street, Robert opened Bob’s Bazaar Bizarre at a local flea market selling primitive art, jewelry and antiques. Despite some days making a generous profit, he often didn’t earn enough to make ends meet and this resulted in Robert scavenging for any items to sell and allowing people to stay at his home for rent. A local merchant, Paul Howell befriended Robert and soon after Paul’s younger son, Jerry became friends with him as well. Despite Jerry and his friends taunting Robert for his sexuality, he later confided in him that he and his friends worked as male prostitutes.

Murders

Jerry Howell

On July 5, 1984 Berdella murdered his first victim and friend, 19-year-old Jerry Howell. Robert claimed that he fed Jerry alcohol, Valium, and acepromazine until he became unconscious, after which he tied the young man to his bed. Restrained to the bed for approximately 28 hours, Robert repeatedly raped, tortured and violated Jerry with foreign objects until he passed away from asphyxiation from the gag in his mouth and choking on his own vomit. After Jerry passed away, Robert drained his body of blood and dismembered him with a chainsaw and boning knives. He then wrapped the sections in newspaper and threw them in trash cans for the garbage crew to take to the local landfill.

Robert Sheldon

On April 10, 1985 23-year-old Robert Sheldon showed up on his doorstep asking for a place to stay. For three days he held him captive, shoved needles under his nails, filled his ears with caulking, and bound his hands with piano wire in attempt to permanently damage the nerves in his hands. On April 15, Berdella suffocated Sheldon and dismembered his body in his third floor bathroom. 

Mark Wallace

Finding Mark inside his tool shed seeking shelter, Robert invited him into his home and offered him chlorpromazine to help calm and relax him. Mark willingly accepted, and 30 minutes later Berdella tied him up and attached alligator clips to his nipples to facilitate electrical shocks. Within an hour, Wallace fell into a state of unconsciousness and passed away around 7 p.m. on June 23.

James Ferris

On September 26, 1985 Berdella invited his acquaintance James Ferris to stay at his home. Picking him up from a local bar, Berdella drugged him with tranquilizers and proceeded to torture Ferris for nearly 27 hours. He subjected him to 7,700 volts of electric shocks to his shoulder and testicles for up to five minutes at a time. All the while, Berdella inserted hypodermic needles into his neck and genitals. Shortly after, Ferries died.

Todd Stoops

Previously living with Berdella, a chance encounter between the two solidified Stoops fate; after inviting him to his house for lunch, he drugged him and his two-week torture plan with Stoops began. Berdella used electrical shocks through his eyelids to attempt to blind him and injected drain cleaner into his larynx to silence his screams. In the second week of captivity, Berdella ruptured Stoops anal wall with his fist which caused septic shock. On July 1, 1986 Todd Stoops succumbed to his injuries. 

Larry Wayne Pearson

Meeting Berdella at his Bazaar shop, the two quickly became friends. Shortly after, Pearson began living with Berdella and even did chores around the house as a way of paying rent. He initially didn’t plan on killing Pearson, but after he began jokingly referring to his practice of robbing gay men in Wichita, Berdella injected him with chlorpromazine and brought him to his basement. Being the most submissive victim thus far, Berdella agreed to allow him to move to a bedroom. As long as he didn’t rebel he would not continue to inflict as much pain on him. After six weeks of captivity, Pearson bit into Berdella’s penis, screaming that he can’t do this anymore. Berdella first bludgeoned him with a tree limb then suffocated him.

Final victim- Christopher Bryson

On March 29, 1988, Berdella abducted his final victim, a 22 year old male prostitute by the name of Christopher Bryson. With a promise of sex, Berdella lured him to his home and knocked him unconscious with an iron bar. Once bound to the bed, he was tortured in a manner like previous victims; although swabbing his eyes with ammonia was unique to his torture. After a few days, Berdella began to trust Bryson and was willing to discuss aspects of the abuse he was being subjected to. He finished the conversation with a warning:

“I’ve gotten this far with other people before, and they’re dead now, because of mistakes they made.” Now earning his trust, Bryson convinced Berdella to tie his hands in front of his body instead of behind, preventing loss of circulation to his hands. Lighting his restraints with a book of matches Berdella forgot in the room, he jumped out of the second floor window, breaking his ankle in the process and ran towards a meter reader shouting for them to call the police.

Arrest

After the discovery of Bryson, authorities searched Berdella’s home and found the electrical transformer with the wires leading to the bed, a metal tray holding syringes and a long iron pipe. Searching the whole home, investigators located a human skull, human vertebrae and several human teeth hidden in envelopes. 334 Polaroid pictures and 34 snapshot prints of different males were found in Berdella’s home which depicted his victims in life and death. Accepting a plea bargain, he confessed in graphic detail how he killed each victim, what forms of torture he used against them, and what he did with their bodies. On December 19, 1988 Berdella was charged with one count of first degree murder (of Robert Sheldon) and four counts of second degree murder. In response to his guilty pleas, the judge imposed another five concurrent life sentences. 

At 3:55 p.m. on October 8, 1992 Berdella died of a heart attack in the prison infirmary at the age of 43.

Beyond a Reasonable Doubt

Statement of Purpose? My political lines? My don’t doxx me e-plea?

I think what really interests me now is application, ok-I’m convinced of most of the radical feminist analysis but how do we marry that to the left? How do we force left wing parties to accept our program and/or be effective on our own?

Because of the stigmatization of “radical feminism” in left spaces this blog is mostly anonymous unfortunately. Tumblr has always been a space where I feel I can be most myself so you will definitely see personal, aesthetic and historical content but the meat of this blog is a theoretical and historical exploration of how to get women’s issues on the docket. If we even can.

About me:

I am a Marxist Feminist with two degrees in American history a BA and an MA. I am also a lesbian. I was radicalized into feminism at age 20 after hearing a lecture on “queering ecosocialism” after receiving news that a former gay acquaintance had recently passed from drug addiction and sex work. The dichotomy between true lived gay and lesbian life experiences and the use of “queer” as a political and literary device made me sick, sad and angry and I took to the internet and found that there were a good deal of lesbians who felt the same way.

While I studied American history, I’m not an academic and this work is not peer reviewed. I will do my best to be transparent about my source material and get access to scholarly sources when I can so that you have the most knowledge to make an informed decision about my writing. I welcome substantive feedback, particularly since I have not been trained in political theory, economics or philosophy even though I read widely. Unfortunately, writing about gender and feminism in the candid way I want is difficult in the academy right now for both financial and political reasons. Some people can learn to handle mass harassment but, I am but a rat, I try to avoid it where I can. Getting mass harassment on a poverty salary is a type of vulnerability I’m not really willing to take on.

While Marxism isn’t the only lens I view politics from, it’s a really important one to disclose. I am not affiliated with the Democratic party outside of generally supporting everyone to vote fascists out of office but even then, I think fascism will be rooted out through the education and uplift of the people generally, not through Democratic party politics.

This means that I focus on building grassroots power through unions and collectives over voting for specific candidates and I believe that the very structure of US society will continue to negatively impact regular working people no matter what party is in power. The only solution is the broad restricting of our economy and society which regular people can accomplish by coming together and solving problems in their community and within our country and world. I draw upon a robust historical tradition of trade unionism in the United States and in my home countries if Italy and The Republic of Ireland (so yes, I am whiter than snow ahaha).

Many radical feminists have a left liberal framework, I aim to spend a good deal of time writing about how many radical feminists were socialists affiliated with Mao and expelling some myths that both the Sexist Marxist Left and the Liberal American Feminist Left. I do this with the intent of creating a cohesive left wing vision that offers liberation for all under one banner-my intent is not to fold women into a male dominated left. Anti-Imperialism and Anti Racism is an equally important struggle and it’s one I engage in through a vigorous anti imperialist and anti fascist line but I do not speak from experience. Given the current culture on the far left, I do not engage with individuals whose only claim to argumentative superiority is identity based, you have to tell me why your ideas and perspective is better, life experience and feelings count.

Given that I’m white and catholic and grew up in a rural area. Racial issues can be a blind spot for me, I’ve done a great deal of academic and personal work to remediate this from studying the African Diaspora and Indigenous American culture, philosophy and statecraft in the Caribbean, Brazil, Quebec/New York and the Pacific Northwest to living, working and learning from people of color with vastly different life experiences from me. I’m happy to accept feedback and to promote feminists of color even if we have theoretical disagreements because I recognize that the personal experience of the colonized individual is a distinctly valuable resource in crafting strategies to destroy it but I do not believe there is a singular “woc perspective” and am very sharply critical of liberals who prioritize anti racism in the United States over imperial struggle abroad.

What I do not partake in is abusive cancellation campaigns. While there are a lot of bad actors in all types of politics I don’t think harassment is an effective strategy to encourage good behavior. I believe in good faith engagement and good emotional boundaries. If the content on this blog upsets you you’re 100% free to write a post detailing why you think that and offering improvements and solutions but I will block you if you harass me, call me a fascist without evidence or mischaracterize me. I have enabled abusers and abusive behavior under the guise of idpol in the past but will no longer.

Dr. Ashok Seth: Guiding Cardiology Excellence in New Delhi

Dr. Ashok Seth serves as the Chairman of Fortis Escorts Heart Institute in New Delhi and leads the Cardiology Council for the entire Fortis Group of Hospitals. His remarkable contributions to the field of Cardiology, particularly in Interventional Cardiology, have earned recognition both nationally and internationally.

Innovative Techniques and Achievements

Throughout his illustrious 30-year career, Dr. Seth has pioneered numerous groundbreaking angioplasty techniques. These include Directional Atherectomy, Angioscopy, and the use of various cutting-edge devices such as Stents, Thrombectomy devices, and Drug-Eluting Stents. He's also known for introducing advanced procedures like the Impella heart support device for failing hearts, Bioabsorbable Stents, and Transcatheter Aortic Valve Implantation (TAVI). His expertise in these areas has led to successful implementations not only in India but also across the Asia Pacific region.

Recognition and Awards

Dr. Seth's exceptional contributions have garnered prestigious accolades, including the National Honours of "Padma Bhushan" and "Padma Shri" awarded by the President of India in 2015 and 2003, respectively. He's also been honored with the National Award of the Republic of Spain, the 'Officer's Cross Order of Isabella the Catholic,' and the 'Mason Sones Award' from the Society for Cardiovascular Angiography and Interventions (SCAI) in the USA, among others.

Leadership Roles and Global Influence

Dr. Seth has held prominent leadership positions in various cardiology societies, including serving as the President of the Cardiological Society of India and Vice President of the Asian Pacific Society of Cardiology. His influence extends globally, having been elected as a Board of Trustee of SCAI (USA) and participating in numerous international conferences and training courses. He's renowned for his expertise in complex angioplasty techniques and has delivered lectures and demonstrations in over 400 events worldwide.

Contributions to Medical Literature and Education

In addition to his clinical work, Dr. Seth has made significant contributions to medical literature, with over 250 publications in prestigious Indian and international medical journals. He's authored and edited chapters in 10 textbooks of Cardiology and Medicine, and edited two books specifically focused on Cardiology. Furthermore, he's played a pivotal role in training more than 350 cardiologists from India and abroad in advanced angioplasty techniques.

In essence, Dr. Ashok Seth's pioneering spirit, remarkable achievements, and dedication to advancing the field of Cardiology make him a true luminary in the medical world.

We Can't Just Rehab Our Way Out Of Addiction

The overall goal is to create a space for thoughtful contemplation so people can leave with a better understanding of how a city's changing economy affects public health. Especially those communities that are the most disadvantaged and ignored.

What is my story?

I am a 33-year-old recovered addict from Hamilton, Ohio. I was in active addiction through my 20s. I am a product of divorced parents and a private school education. I was raised Catholic living in a household with my mother, grandmother, and one of my sisters. I also carried on the legacy of addiction, which was passed down from my grandfather to my father, and then to me. It could go back further than that for all I know, but I never met my paternal grandfather. What I do know is that my father is a success story and so am I. I will be graduating from The University of Nevada, Las Vegas after many years of study off and on. What is my field of study do you ask? Sociology of course. Did I choose this path to better understand the world around me? Did I choose this path to better understand myself? I would like to think it was both.

Many of us have struggled with addiction as a very personal issue, but how do social problems affect personal problems?

Most of us have heard the phrase, we are a product of our environment and have some knowledge of the nature versus nurture debate.

Michael Schwalbe makes a good point about nature versus nurture in his book "The Sociologically Examined Life". In Chapter 5 he states that the debate is irrelevant because nature and nurture are inseparable in the human experience. Both always play a role in human development and cannot be separated so why should we debate which holds more importance? I find this stance to be important when discussing addiction because doctors and clinics have succeeded in alleviating some of the stigma of drug addiction by labeling it a disease, but only focus on genetic disposition and biology versus socioeconomic factors.

Hamilton, Ohio used to be a manufacturing city, but as times changed and factories closed jobs disappeared.

Pharmaceutical companies and doctors helped create the disaster that is the opioid epidemic, therefore they cannot be the sole solution. We also might not be able to find a solution without them.

The overprescribing of opiates led to patients having excess medication that they did not always use. In an environment where people are struggling financially people are going to be more likely to seek black market drug sales as a supplemental income. I witnessed this firsthand. I knew a dealer who was selling drugs to pay his mother's mortgage. I had a boyfriend who was living with his single mother and sick aunt. His aunt was a police officer who retired early due to injuries sustained on duty. She was prescribed many medications. The family would sell half of her prescription of Percocet to help pay the bills, and the demand was there. Many people were seeking opiates on the black market due to a lack of insurance, being dropped from their insurance, or their doctor taking them off of a medication they had become addicted to.

There is a lot of shame around drug abuse. People feel ashamed when they can't stop using opiates after their doctor stops prescribing them. People feel shame when they have to sell a family member's or their own prescription just to get by. People feel shame when a substance has control over their lives.

Addiction and depression often go hand in hand. Many of those who developed a relationship with opiates on the street rather than in the doctor's office are just self-medicating. Some people drink their problems away. Some people numb themselves with drugs to make their problems go away. Unfortunately, those problems are always there waiting for you when you sober up.

Expressions of despair and unhappiness with the world are often valid even if they do not justify the behavior (drug use) that is hurting themselves and their families. So my next question is, how do you get someone to have a higher regard for their life when they see the world as such a dark place? Active addiction is often a welcomed distraction. Rather than solely focusing on medication and rehab, communities should put more thought into the reason so many people feel the need to be distracted.

This brings me back to the importance of good jobs. If people were given opportunities to do more meaningful work, then potentially they would be less inclined to despair and less likely to seek temporary distractions.

I have been through the rehabilitation process and though it has its benefits, it also has its flaws. Many people fall through the cracks. People see rehab as a new place to network and shop for street drugs; before class, on break, and after class, I saw numerous people trading and selling drugs. Some of these drugs were ones being prescribed at the facility. I do not say this to discredit counselors or rehabilitation facilities as a whole, but how can this be accepted as a functional solution when it is failing so many people? Many don't make meaningful changes in their lives due to other stresses that cannot be solved by talking with a social worker for 2 hours 3 times a week. Many are in rehab to avoid jail time rather than choosing rehab of their own volition. Rehabilitation centers are popping up as quick as pawn shops these days. So what is to be done?

In my personal experience with outpatient services at SoJourner in Hamilton, Ohio I was held back from progressing to the final step in the program due to cannabis use which has just recently been made legal in the state. What a reason to keep someone from completing a program to recover from opiate abuse. Is that an effective way to rehabilitate someone? Obviously, I didn't think so, and I quit. I had the luxury to quit because I was not there via court order like many others were. My takeaway from my own rehabilitation experience at Sojourner was that many of these rehab facilities are more focused on making a profit from the suffering of others than actually changing their lives. I saw overworked counselors who, often due to burnout, were not treating patients as individuals. People were and often still are treated as statistics and dollar bills. The more time they spend in rehab the more money there is to be made.

I chose to move across the country with a stash of Suboxone and hope I could get through it if I just remove myself from my environment and supply. It was a rough road, but it worked for me. I was lucky. I had the means to move, and the support system to help me. I wish more people had the resources necessary to turn their lives around. I have some friends who succeeded as well, and some who didn't. One other friend moved away, another completed rehab and became a substance abuse counselor himself, another overdosed and left behind a young child, and yet another just passed from overdose a month and a half ago leaving his sister to visit the grave of her older brother and her mother.

I am not satisfied with our current understanding and solutions to this disease we call addiction. Similarly, I am not satisfied with our current understanding of preventative care, the rights of corporations, and wealth accumulation. All of these questions and feelings of dissatisfaction led me to sociology.

so let us be open to more dissatisfaction in hopes that that will lead to more discussion, which will in turn lead to new solutions.

jun 2

friday headlines

Pride Month 2023 Launches To A First-Ever Major Pushback As Glamour Magazine Features ‘Pregnant Man’ Logan Brown On Their Digital Edition Cover Pride Month 2023 officially started today, and to quote the movie ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’, it’s ‘shaping up to be a squall!’. Glamour Magazine is featuring ‘proof’ of a ‘pregnant man’ on the cover of its UK digital edition which is emblematic of what the true problem really is.

Elon Musk’s Neuralink Gets FDA Approval to Study Brain Implants in Humans Neuralink, Elon Musk’s neurotechnology company, recently obtained approval from the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to conduct a clinical study of brain implants in humans. This marks the first in-human clinical study for the company.

Criminals ‘Can Find Everything’ About You, Warns Surveillance Expert Artificial intelligence (AI) has advanced to such a level that criminals can now surveil and know “everything” about their targets, including predicting where the targets could be at some point in the future, experts warn.

Shocking New York Times Review of The Little Mermaid Complains the Children’s Film Had Insufficient ‘Kink’ The review, perhaps correctly, noted that the film “reeks of obligation and noble intentions,” but lost most people when it continued to say “joy, fun, mystery, risk, flavor, kink — they’re missing.”

Synthetic biology aims to replace natural life forms with something that is man-made Several years ago, leaked FEMA documents described that people would be put into FEMA camps for, essentially, re-education.  That concept “is old,” Celeste Solum told Maria Zeee.  The plan has been replaced by a “posthuman” ideology.

Now or Never – Israel and Iran’s Nuclear Weapons Program Iran is busy building new, impenetrable nuclear bunkers and developing advanced ballistic missiles. What is Israel waiting for? There are all kinds of developments that indicate Israel is getting closer to direct action against Iran.

‘Surveillance over every citizen on Earth’: Devious group looks to rule entire world The World Health Organization has set its sights on establishing “a platform for global governance through health care.”

Fears Satanists have returned as lamb’s throat slit and has Bible placed on dead body A coven of Satanists could again be stalking the New Forest, locals fear, after a slaughtered lamb was found with a bloodstained Bible resting on its body. There were concerns raised in 2019 after evidence of Satanic rituals was found in the forest. Pigs were found with their hearts ripped out and sheep and cows were also killed and mutilated.

REVEALED: Target tells employees only ‘extremists’ are concerned with sexualization of children As Target faces backlash, resulting in monetary losses over its Pride collection, the company has sent an internal memo stating that those who worry about the sexualization of children are extremists. The line includes clothing and accessories for children, including shirts that read “Queer! Queer! Queer!” and onesies about how trans is beautiful.

Thousands Of Roman Catholics Flock To Worship At The Dead Body Of ‘Miracle Nun’ Sister Wilhelmina Lancaster Whose Body Did Not Decay The ‘miracle nun’ Sister Wilhelmina Lancaster whose exhumed body showed nearly no signs of decomposition four years after she died is drawing thousands of Roman Catholics hoping to worship her corpse

Biden’s ex-nuclear official played key role in blasphemous drag ‘nuns’ group The disgraced former Biden administration official, Sam Brinton, reportedly used to serve as the principal officer for Washington D.C.’s chapter of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence…Brinton was also present at an explicit Easter Sunday event in San Francisco in 2019, where scantily clad men mimicked Christ’s crucifixion and poll-danced on a cross.

EMA admits COVID Vaccination causes Infertility The European Medicines Agency (EMA) has finally admitted that Covid-19 vaccination can have an adverse effect on female fertility. The admission comes months after it was revealed in confidential Pfizer documents revealed that shedding of the Covid-19 vaccine is possible by skin-to-skin contact and/or breathing the same air as a vaccinated person, and can, unfortunately, lead to menstrual cycle disruption among women and miscarriage among pregnant women.

Disneyland Hires Man In Dress to Greet Little Girls At Bibbidy Bobbidi Boutique A video that was uploaded on Twitter by Jason Jones shows a grown man wearing a dress at Disneyland’s Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique. In the video a man who clearly has a mustache is wearing a dress and greeting little girls as they walk into the dress boutique.

satan Has Become One Of The Hottest Spiritual Figures In America Should we be surprised?  As our society comes apart at the seams all around us, Satan and Satanism are becoming extremely popular.  Videos featuring Satan are getting millions of views on TikTok and YouTube, millions of Americans are watching shows that feature Satan as a main character on Netflix and other streaming services, and the Satanic Temple has become one of the fastest growing religious organizations that the United States has ever seen.

Warning on Upcoming Disney+ Show About a Girl Carrying satan’s Baby The family-friendly entertainment organization MovieGuide is sounding the alarm about an upcoming Disney+ that features a teenage girl’s love affair with satan.

You Say You Want a Revival? We also see no evidence of a major revival in the End Times. If anything, we expect growing apostasy and more virulent rebellion against God. That is why Jesus asked rhetorically whether the Son of Man will find faith on the Earth when He comes again (Luke 18:8).

Thomas F. Burgoyne Sr. - December 23, 1940 - January 26, 2023

Thomas Francis Burgoyne, Sr., 82, of Wheeling, West Virginia, passed away peacefully at home surrounded by his family, on Thursday, January 26, 2023. Tom was born on December 23, 1940, in Lancaster, Massachusetts, the oldest child of Francis and Alice (Langen) Burgoyne. He was preceded in death by his parents and by his beloved wife of 48 years, Kathy. Tom graduated from Lancaster High School in 1958 and earned a Bachelor’s Degree in History from St. Anselm College in 1963. Upon graduation, he began work as a clerk with the Federal Bureau of Investigation in Washington, DC. In 1965 he graduated from the FBI Academy in Quantico, Virginia and began work as a Special Agent, under then-Director J. Edgar Hoover. Tom’s career as an FBI agent started in Miami, Florida where he was assigned to the Fugitive Squad. He was then transferred to the Pittsburgh FBI Field Office. In the late 1960s another transfer brought Tom to Wheeling, where he met and married his beloved wife Kathy. They settled in the neighborhood of Dimmeydale, and once in Wheeling, Tom poured his heart and soul into the community. During his time at the Wheeling FBI Office, Tom headed the Federal Organized Crime and Drug Enforcement Task Force. He dedicated numerous hours to the investigation of Wheeling’s organized crime groups and took pride in the numerous convictions which resulted.Tom retired from the FBI in 1996 after 33 years with the Bureau and became the Deputy Director of the Office of Law Enforcement Technology Commercialization, a Division of the National Institute of Justice, where he worked for 4 years. From 1997 to 1999 he taught Criminal Justice at Wheeling Jesuit University as an Adjunct Professor. In 2000, he was elected the Sheriff of Ohio County, West Virginia and was re-elected to the position again in 2004, where he served until 2008. In 2008 he obtained his private investigation license, forming TBI Investigations, an endeavor he continued until his death. Tom made service to others a priority, and he dedicated much of his life to volunteer work. He coached youth baseball in Miami, later helped create and coach the Dimmeydale Rockets little league baseball team, coached YMCA flag football, and was a girls’ basketball coach at St. Michael Parish School. Throughout his life he served on the boards of several Wheeling organizations, including Wheeling Hospital, Crittendon Services; the Homeless Coalition, and Youth Services System, Inc. While Sheriff, he established a program called S.W.E.A.T., Support Wheeling’s Effort at Teens, and seeing his “S.W.E.A.T. kids” succeed in life brought him much joy. Tom’s three children all graduated from Wheeling Central Catholic High School and Tom’s love for Central and its students was immeasurable. He joined Central’s Boosters club in 1985 and remained active with the club for the remainder of his life. He took pride in working as Central’s liaison to the Drug Free Clubs of America and then helped establish Clubs at schools across the Ohio Valley. He also established an endowment fund at Central in Kathy’s name, which provides tuition assistance to qualifying students. On Friday nights in the fall, you could usually find Tom on the sidelines of a Wheeling Central football game rooting on the Maroon Knights, no matter where in the state the game was being played. In 2015, Tom and Kathy received the prestigious Bishop’s Cross by the Catholic Diocese of Wheeling-Charleston for their dedication and contribution to Catholic education. In 2021, Youth Services System of Wheeling honored Tom with its Good Samaritan Award in honor of his mentorship and encouragement to others, which he often even extended to individuals he had previously arrested. Tom’s love of the Boston Red Sox took root when he was a boy growing up in Massachusetts in the 40's and 50’s. He was thrilled when, as part of the Good Samaritan Award, the Red Sox honored him during the seventh inning stretch of the Sox’s September 16, 2021 game against the New York Yankees as their “Hometown Hero.” He was on top of the world, with his children and grandchildren in attendance at the game. Tom loved joining his family on beach vacations to Cape Cod, where he often ended the day with a plate of little neck clams or oysters on the half shell, a lobster, and a cold beer. He also looked forward to his annual winter trips to Florida, where he had built an entire community of friends. Most of all, he loved spending time watching his grandchildren participate in their respective sports and activities. Of all his accomplishments, Tom was most proud of the family that he and Kathy built together. Surviving him are his daughter Erin K. Reisenweber (John) of Martinsburg, WV; his son Tom, Jr. of South Jordan, UT; his daughter Elizabeth A. Amico (Joseph) of Peabody, MA; and seven cherished grandchildren of whom he was so proud: Jack, Lilly, and Benjamin Reisenweber; Kenadee and Kannon Burgoyne; and Katie and Joey Amico. He also leaves his sister, Kathleen Durvarney (Steve) and brother Bill, both of Massachusetts; as well as beloved brothers-in-law and sisters-in-law on Kathy’s side of the family and numerous nieces and nephews, all of whom were special to him. He also leaves his special friend, Bea Glenn, with whom he enjoyed much laughter and good times over the past couple of years. Family and friends will be received from 2 pm to 4 pm and 6 pm to 8 pm on Monday, January 30, 2023, and again from 9:30 am to 11:30 am on Tuesday, January 31, 2023, at Altmeyer’s Funeral Homes – Elm Grove Chapel, 154 Kruger Street, Wheeling, WV. Funeral liturgy with Mass will be held on Tuesday, January 31, 2023, at St. Michael Catholic Church, 1225 National Road, Wheeling, WV. Interment will be held at Mt. Calvary Cemetery, Wheeling. In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to Wheeling Central Catholic High School Tuition Assistance Program, 77 14th Street, Wheeling, WV 26003. Online condolences may be extended to the family at www.altmeyerfuneralhomes.com Read the full article

How to Develop My “Arch”

An “arch”, is any writer’s guide, teaching you how to write a medium (not a genre, a political aim), for law in courts, the space between observation, and rules, the components and rules combined between observation and rules, a secondary state wherein the external and the rules are stripped from view of argument.

In other words, the amicus curae is impossible, the consultation from historian, the undergraduate in education, the parole officer, and the master’s in history, the concreted abstract, is the same, with the remand upon state to prevent past disaster researched through class taken as 500, undergraduate, and TA’s program, introductory, the shift to repeal upon common worker in reformed.

You can draw these from “arches”, in my background, as an example, a resource economics (commodities, anti-Italian), world history (Catholic Crusades, pre-law ACLU anti-Saddamist), and creative writing (clerk, insurance issues, sales upon register).

Batman (MI-6 orphan), Green Arrow (MI-6 affair with President), Hellblazer (drug dealer butler Anglican), Arthur (King of Nine Kingdoms, Ireland, Britain, France), Joker (Friend to Clan Ally, the Jew, INTERPOL/KGB), Mordred/Starscream (Pierre the Coward, British Spy in the Third Crusade), Captain Blackbeard/Mad Hatter/Superman/Joker (Self-Scribe, Edward Thatch, lying journalist), Cobra Trooper (C-17, John Charlie), Puck (Williams Theater House, Globe Theatre, Research Writer), Hollywood/Film Freak/Maltese Falcon (John Markham, Jehovah's Witnesses, Theater Spy), Robin Hood (Ares Gypsy, Lairdship, the Morguesmaster), Wolverine (James Hewlett O'Neill Logan, Ace Comics Writer, Minnesota, KIA, Korean War, sperm stolen to Marie Paradis, grandmother), Victor Zsasz (Combat Magazine, Marie Paradis, Research Theory, New England), Raoul Silva (Self, Class Election Prank, Republican, Heterosexual Class Council Candidate, Nazi, pro-Tory).

Each one of those, has an easy Wikipedia reference of related characters, to place in any space, through information given to barred defense attorney, with actual written character removed, hence the “carpentry”, the brace, upon the “arch”, the masonry, obscured, to defeat the Freemasons, who demand deliberate lines, against cops and journalists and empowered women, as doctors and spies and internationalists, interchangeable.

Isn’t she just delightful?

Catherine of Aragon has one of the more fascinating media legacies of anyone in the Tudor period, not in terms of how her image has fluctuated over the years, but because of how notably it hasn’t. Other hardcore Catholics of the Henrician court are inevitably vilified in stories from Protestant perspectives - Thomas More, Cardinal Wolsey, Jane Seymour and above all else Mary I, to name a few. “Protestant perspectives” doesn’t just refer to reformation texts, it includes books from the perspective of Protestant figures; usually Anne Boleyn or Elizabeth I, and more recently Thomas Cromwell with Hilary Mantel’s Wolf Hall books. Despite her unwavering faith in both the Catholic Church and her own position, Catherine’s reputation has, up until the past twenty years or so, remained close to stellar; her marriage into the English monarchy at a young age did well to divorce her from her parent’s religious persecutions, and her death some fifteen years or so before her daughter took the throne kept her from being tarnished by association to Mary’s resurrection of medieval heresy laws.

As a Tudor queen, Catherine has largely gone down in history for her irreproachable conduct, even after that history began to tilt towards the side of a religion she opposed - she is known for her charity, her piety, and her belief in her husband’s good nature no matter how vile his behavior grew to be, even at the expense of her own self image. According to Chapuys (who in this case there is no reason to disbelieve) she went to her grave questioning wether Henry’s actions after their divorce was her fault, wondering wether, if she had given him what he wanted, he may not have felt the need to break from Rome, mistreat their daughter and execute two men - one a long term friend and one his own grandmother’s religious advisor. Catherine is a noble figure, she is a tragic figure, she is most of all a dignified figure, and in Tudor media she is always given at least a sympathetic nod if not a complex or three dimensional portrayal. 

The key phrase there, though, is as a Tudor queen. Whatever else she was, Catherine was decidedly not a modern woman, just like all of her female peers living five hundred years ago were decidedly not modern women; her unflinching religious beliefs, her many attempts at producing a male heir and her devotion to her marriage are admirable traits of a female noble of the sixteenth century, less so of a twenty first century wife or businesswoman. She was a product of her time, and modernized or semi modernized Tudor media’s attempts to portray her - specifically the brand of modern Tudor media that sets out to depict Anne and Henry’s relationship as one of Sexy High Romance - always end up turning Catherine into a misogynistic caricature of herself, historical legacy be damned. The blog anneboleynnovels describes it best:

“Catherine’s greatest hurdle has been not Protestant novels, but modernized ones. These are the one subgenre in which her character at best is severely degraded and at worst is completely unrecognizable. It’s not surprising that it should be like this — finding modern corollaries to Anne and Henry, whether in an office, a Hollywood mansion, or a high school, is doable. As for most of the people who surrounded them, while some some people are harder to wrench into modern poses than others, it’s relatively easy to cut and alter those characters to make them work better in a modern setting. Catherine, however, is completely lost here. She needs to exist, or else the central conflict disappears — but she simply doesn’t have a real modern equivalent, at least not in the kinds of societies that modernizers write about; her determination that God had put her in her position and that she had to safeguard her daughter’s legitimacy, and thus her inheritance, is impossible to convey fully, especially since Henry’s historical behavior — taking a presumed inheritance from Mary, forcibly separating the two women, and confining them in residences of his choosing — can’t be precisely replicated in a modern novel without making him at best a creep and at worst a criminal. In neither case would that Henry be an appealing love object for a modern Anne, so his behavior is inevitably made more standard — he’s simply a wealthy man divorcing his wife of twenty years, and instead of taking her settlement and moving on, his wife just refuses to let go.”

As the post on Catherine’s fictionalized history points out, attempts to judge her through a modern lens, particularly in stories that center around that grand, not-at-all-murderous love affair of Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn inevitably fail to produce a balanced assesment. Susan Bordo’s highly modernized study the Creation of Anne Boleyn treats her like a footnote at best and a self righteous fool at worst, while the Catherine of Suzannah Dunn’s The Queen of Subtleties is disgustingly nicknamed “Fat Cath” (stupid cow, how could she let herself go like that after six pregnancies?) and features its leading lady, another ahead-of-her-time portrayal of Anne Boleyn, going out of her way to condescendingly paint Catherine to the reader as vengeful and delusional. Anne of Hollywood and Anne and Henry present the worst portrayals, one a hideous, deliberately unsympathetic drug addict and the other a teenage psychotic forced on Henry by his father, leading her poor, brow beaten boyfriend by the hand.

That’s not to say it would be impossible to write a well rounded modern Catherine of Aragon, but most modernized Tudor novels simply don’t care to try and make her well rounded; she exists solely to be the convenient road block to Anne and a whitewashed Henry’s happiness, a flat example of the Hysterical Woman trope rather than a Queen, a mother, or a politician. It isn’t Anne Boleyn’s fault that this happens (she can’t exactly object) but this version of Catherine never fails to rear its ugly head in Tudor media that aims to portray Anne, literally or figuratively, as a “woman of the future.” Since that reading of Anne has gained momentum over the years, this Catherine inevitably does so too.

What makes the Spanish Princess so unbearable is how blatantly Emma Frost is trying, and egregiously failing, to flip the script on this. Whatever her personal dislike of Anne Boleyn, she is very obviously trying to take this fictitious version of Anne Boleyn that has sprung up over the past few decades - that of the rebellious, sexy, pseudo feminist Modern Woman™ - and apply it to Catherine of Aragon, who was neither rebellious, a feminist or, after six pregnancies, five infant deaths and a battle with heart cancer, all that sexy. The intimacy and very real affection she and Henry shared in the early years of their marriage is stilted and unemotional, replaced by an absurd number of sex scenes and a very out of place “warrior kween” nickname. It isn’t enough for Catherine to organize a massive military campaign and give a speech to an assembly of soldiers while heavily pregnant, real life accomplishments of hers which have gone largely unacknowledged - no, the Catherine of the Spanish Princess needs to literally fight in battle, pregnant belly armor and all, subtly implying that her many miscarriages were the result of her own behavior, never mind the fact that Henry’s later wives had miscarriages as well. The deeply devoted friends Catherine actually had, one of whom served her for decades and risked royal punishment to be with her on her deathbed, are either erased entirely or put into invented conflicts with her. Her relationship with the only one of her children that survived infancy is perverted into a cold, uncaring motherhood, marked by disappointment and a refusal to even hold her daughter, let alone personally teach her Latin, commission scholars to write books for her, and request those same scholars take charge of her education.

In place of all these details, the things that make the historically minded audience love Catherine in the first place, several sordid aspects of Anne Boleyn’s fictional representations are assigned to Frost’s Catherine of The Upside Down: the ~unnatural~ blowjobs and poorly designed French hoods, the general air of cattiness, the excessive nudity, the hatred of her daughter, the inability to sexually please her husband, and the weird sense of anger at all the women in her life all stand out as hallmarks of Anne Boleyn’s less flattering portrayals, but so too do the clear attempts to pander to a feminist audience and sell itself as new age and progressive.

The fouler examples of Catherine as a modern woman aren’t yet the prevalent perception of her; a gaggle of misguided twenty first century books isn’t enough to erase the near spotless reputation she’s maintained for half a millennium. But the Spanish Princess fails to depict a more positive modernization of Catherine because it’s lazy in the attempt - it sees the habit of trying to turn sixteenth century queens into anything but sixteenth century queens and tries to replicate it by taking a handful of theatrical trends and having their protagonist perform them. Those trends have been apart of Anne Boleyn’s portrayal in the media for so long it wouldn’t be that strange to see her acting that way on screen, no matter how historically inaccurate they may be, but to assign them to someone with such a vastly different public history as Catherine is just jarring. She wasn’t like that, nobody thinks she was like that, Tudor media has always known her as being not like that, and the result is something that’s confusing at best and outright offensive at worst. It’s not fun to watch, but it’s interesting to examine, broader context in mind.

(Also credit to @queenmarytudor for that image of Meg and Mary, and seriously, check out anneboleynnovels. They’re great.)

info dump for my v! was gonna make this into a whole tag meme but the prompts aren’t very original. oops.

THE BASICS:

FULL NAME: Valerie King.

ALIAS: V / Veronica Li.

DATE OF BIRTH: August 27th, 2049.

AGE (AS OF 2077): 28.

PLACE OF BIRTH: Heywood, Night City.

RACE/CULTURE: Chinese American.

RELIGION: It’s complicated. (Raised Catholic... Now unsure.)

SEXUALITY: Bi

GENDER / PRONOUNS: Cis female, she/her.

SPOKEN LANGUAGES: English and Spanish.

RIGHT OR LEFT HANDED: Right handed.

EDUCATION: College drop-out.

OCCUPATION: Agent at the counterintelligence division of Arasaka, second to Assistant Director Jenkins. Later, mercenary. 

APPEARANCE: 

HAIR: Black. Mid length. Straight. Loose. Briefly changes to neon green, bob cut. Then, back again.

EYES: Dark brown. 

NOTEABLE FEATURES: Freckles on face and body. 

TATTOOS: Snake wrapped around left wrist / Dragon wrapped around left shoulder / Lovers tarot card on left inner forearm / ‘LUCKY YOU’ on left hip joint just above crotch. Angel wings & halo with ‘JACKIE’ on right inner wrist / Collection of roses on right hip and upper thigh / ‘DEATH CAN WAIT’ on bottom of right ribcage. “Johnny + V” in a heart on right inner forearm. 

PIERCINGS: Right and left lobe, double piercing. Philtrum piercing. Navel piercing.

CYBERNETICS/PROSTHETICS: Visible golden cybernetic... plate? on her neck. It can have a skin-like texture covering but it’s sorta transparent. Replaced right hand, and again: has a skin-like texture finish but slightly transparent so the gold chrome is visible. Kiroshi eyes (natural color). Enhanced knee caps/ankles for long distanced jumping. Mantis blades. Cardiovascular and Respiratory system is almost all tech, as is much of her nervous system etc. 

SCARS: None from combat. She has stretch marks on her butt, boobs and tummy.

BODY SHAPE: Curvy / plus size. Not skinny or muscled. Soft.

HEIGHT: 5′3. 

FASHION SENSE: Neon, metallic, holographic. Short skirts, crop tops and big coats / jackets. Wedged sneakers or heeled boots. (Johnny says her style is “hooker”, but what the fuck does Johnny know. He’s worn the same outfit for like 70+ years. Get with the times, grandpa.)

MAKE UP: Neon. Loves yellow or green eyeshadow / eyeliner and shiny colored lip gloss.

NAILS: Long and pointed, like triangle shaped. Always with a metallic finish, colored either: Red, blue or silver.

PERSONALITY: 

ZODIAC: Virgo sun, Aries moon.

MBTI: INTP.

5 FLAWS: Anxious, high maintenance, clingy, emotionally unavailable, jealous.

5 STRENGTHS: Patient, detail-oriented, ambitious, witty, passionate.

SECRET TALENT(S): Can sing.

LIKES: Crappy daytime soap operas, artificial strawberry flavored foods and skin care, MONEY!! and NC in the rain at night.

DISLIKES: Healthy food (She has never touched a vegetable... She’s pretty gross.), other people’s mess, anything with a matte texture and rock music (Sorry to Johnny. But she’s never heard a Samurai song and never will.)

HOBBIES: Boxing. (Not that she ever actually goes more than once a month... She’s got 50+ missed calls from Coach Fred.)

FEARS: Loneliness / being left behind. Being replaced. FOMO.

DREAMS: Stability. A family, whether that’s with a romantic partner or friends. Just someone who’ll stick around.

MUSIC TASTE: Pop, dance, rap. The majority of her library is filled with “girl power” tracks about making money, beating people up and being sexy. 😙

DRINK AND DRUGS: Weed. Likes beer. Smokes cigarettes, thanks to Johnny. Tried various other, harder drugs as a teen but outgrew it.

BAD HABITS: Chews her bottom lip / plays with jewellery when nervous. Tends to bottle up her emotions until she explodes. Has a perpetually messy apartment and will not tidy up.

REASON FOR WANTING TO MAKE IT BIG IN NC: To prove a point. She’s not quite sure who to, sometimes it’s her mom... Other times it’s herself... (She puts a lot of importance on being “self-made”.) For a while, she wanted to succeed for Jackie. Until it got him killed. Now she just wants to survive.

CHILDHOOD HERO: Morgan Blackhand. Corpo-backed mercenary who took on Adam Smasher and may or may not be alive yet? He was like a comic book character to baby V. 

COMBAT/VEHICLES: 

COMBAT STYLE: Netrunner. (Stealth.)

PREFERRED WEAPONS: Her hands. Hacking. A pistol with a silencer. Mantis blades, in an emergency. 

WEAKNESSES: Open combat. She can be slow to react, as she’s overthinking everything. This isn’t the Matrix, unfortunately. 😔

SIGNATURE VEHICLE: Type-66 Avenger, or Jackie’s ARCH.

FAMILY/OTHER RELATIONSHIPS:

FATHER: Everett King, deceased. Low level office worker for Militech.

RELATIONSHIP WITH FATHER: Generally positive. He was her only family for a long time, so V grew very attached. When he passed, she was very angry.

MOTHER: Chloë Li, unknown. Housewife.

RELATIONSHIP WITH MOTHER: Non-existent. Her mom left the family years ago when V was a young child, so her memories of her are vague at best - and clouded by V’s feelings of abandonment.

SIBLING(S): Jordan King (younger brother), deceased.

RELATIONSHIP WITH SIBLING(S): She loved her little brother lots, for the very short time she knew him.

PETS: Nibbles the (creepy) cat.

SIGNIFICANT OTHER: N/A. Briefly, River Ward. (Johnny... but it’s complicated. 😢)

CHILDREN: N/A. She doesn’t want children, ever.

OTHER MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS: Jackie, Mama Welles, T-Bug, Misty, Vik, Judy, Panam, River, Kerry, Padre. Jenkins, in a mentor role.

META: 

LIFE PATH: Corpo. 

CHOSEN ENDING: Worst ending. V [redacted] and dies with Johnny by her side. She doesn’t see the point in struggling on and letting other people die for her, nor does she want to run away. She’s bound to Night City, for better or for worse, and she’d rather go out on her own terms with the most important person in the world to her by her side.

ACTUAL ENDING: V explores the Old City ruins, finds Arasaka’s top secret cryogenics facility. Johnny’s body is recovered, his engram restored and they live happily ever after in Night City. Tah dah! The end!

PRIMARY SKILLS: Intelligence and Cool.

SECONDARY SKILLS: Body and Technical ability.

Blessed Child podcast by Renrobot. The BITE model parts 3 and 4, and a story from Africa.

https://anchor.fm/blessed-child2/episodes/Thought-Control-Explained-e10jbrh

May 10 Thought Control Explained!  (1:25:32) During this Instagram live Renrobot deconstructed thought control in the Unification Church through her own experiences while talking and sharing with others. People from all over the world chimed in and created a very rich dialogue of deconstruction. Also, the murder mentioned happened in 2002. _______________________

https://anchor.fm/blessed-child2/episodes/Emotional-Control-Explained-e10pabf

May 13 Emotional Control Explained  (1:01:29) And we are at the end of the BITE model of authoritarian control. Time to move forward to deconstruct other aspects of the cult. Thank you so much for listening and following this journey. Much love to my listeners, I hope you feel empowered. Remember every time a moonie escapes the cult, a fairy gets its wings. _______________________

https://anchor.fm/blessed-child2/episodes/Labor-trafficking-in-Africa-e10qprl

May 13 Labor trafficking in Africa  (45:06) During this LIVE Instagram was able to connect with a former Unification Church member in Africa. We share the similarities and the differences of our experience in the Unification Church. She also shares insight of what the UC is doing in Africa, in her own experience. We discuss the origins of the UC/FFWPU’s labor trafficking fast food joint Burger Hut and Heaven' G burger. Unknown if they are paying members decent salaries but they are a non-profit fast food restaurant... whatever that is 🤔 _______________________

Blessed Child podcast by Renrobot. Welcome and BITE model parts 1 and 2.

The BITE model developed by Steven Hassan, PhD.

Robert Jay Lifton’s Eight Conditions of Thought Reform (1963)

Sensibly Speaking Podcast: Terror, Love and Brainwashing ft. Alexandra Stein

_______________________

James (Jin Sung) Park’s VEEMA scam

FTC Acts to Halt Vemma as Alleged Pyramid Scheme

Rolling Stone magazine: Selling the Bro Dream: Are Frat Boys Peddling Vemma Suckers?
 Vemma, the wildly popular energy drink company, may or may not be a pyramid scheme, but it’ll definitely be on your college campus soon

John Oliver, pyramid schemes and James (Jin Sung) Park’s VEEMA

Complaints about James (Jin Sung Moon) Park’s VEEMA visit to Northern California in 2011

_______________________

South America

“The Unification Church is truly anti-Christian” and produces “a species of material and spiritual slavery.” Catholic Bishops in Honduras

Brazil Federal Authorities raid offices linked to Sun Myung Moon

Sun Myung Moon:
 “From today on, if you meet anybody around you who criticizes or judges True Family because of what is happening right now, you can hit them in the mouth. If anyone writes a wrong letter to True Family you can break their arm.”     
February 24, 1996, Sao Paolo, Brazil

The Unification Church and the KCIA – ‘Privatizing’ covert action: the case of the UC

Sun Myung Moon’s Drug Paradise

Sun Myung Moon: Emperor of the Universe Transcript and VIDEO

Labor Trafficking by the Unification Church: In South America young members are being offered the chance of a university education, and are then being put on fundraising teams for 2 or 3 years. Rev Kang – the Korean continental director for youth education – is organizing this. About one percent do get to university. Many of the young members of Peru are being enticed. In the words of the Unification Church leader who told me this a few days ago – this is “deception.” The young people eventually get home and they are angry, and their families feel cheated. Somebody just wants the money. They don't care about the hearts of the young people at all. I have further details on this. I think someone is trying to set up MFTs in Brazil to make it another source of cash, since things are getting difficult in Japan, and Brazil has a growing economy. (unknown date)

In 1985 the Washington Times sponsored a fund for the Contras in Nicaragua who committed atrocities, and trafficked drugs to the US

In Bolivia, Moon disciple Tom Ward and the former Hitler SS Officer, Klaus Barbie were often seen together

How Sun Myung Moon’s organization helped to establish Bolivia as South America’s first narco-state.

FFWPU President of IAPP Prosecuted for Money Laundering and Drug Smuggling in US Court; may be connected to UC / FFWPU Leadership

CAUSA and Three South American Terror Generals

“In Korea, one even senses a fear, like one induced by the Mafia, among the opposition, and … outspoken opponents speak of death threats.” Prof. Sontag, 1976

Moon’s followers poured a pot of urine and feces on the head of a Seoul University Professor of Religion.

“WHY did you disobey my order?” … Mr. Yoshizumi hit me and pushed me twice … against a sharp, protruding corner…

Hyun-Jin Preston Moon violence at the New Yorker Hotel

____________________________________

Purity Culture discussion with Faith Y3n – on Ren’s ‘Blessed Child’ podcast

https://anchor.fm/blessed-child2/episodes/Faith-Y3n-on-Purity-Culture-e12pe3t

June 15, 2021
1:30:37

Faith Y3n on Purity Culture 
I found myself deconstructing purity culture on IG live at 1am, when the illustrious Faith Y3n joined in for this complex deconstruction. The conversation has been edited to respect the privacy of other people’s stories and add some info in places. Thanks for joining us. Ren

________________________________

La Secta Moon – español ________________________________
 La Secte Moon – français : 


J’ai arraché mes enfants à Moon – Nansook Hong

1. Pontifical Academy for Life gives the green light to vaccines in development from Moderna, Pfizer and BioNTech.

2. Statement by Sr. Mary Haddad, RSM, President and Chief Executive Officer, Catholic Health Association of the United States

“The Catholic Health Association of the United States (CHA) is encouraged by reports that a COVID-19 vaccine developed by Pfizer and BioNTech is being submitted for emergency utilization approval by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration and another produced by Moderna is not far behind.

“Because COVID-19 has had a disproportionate impact on vulnerable populations, such as the elderly, low-income communities, persons with pre-existing health conditions, and racial and ethnic minorities, CHA believes it is essential that any approved COVID-19 vaccine be distributed in a coordinated and equitable manner.

“In addition, using the guidelines released by the Vatican’s Pontifical Academy for Life in 2005 and 2017 on the origin of vaccines, CHA ethicists, in collaboration with other Catholic bioethicists, find nothing morally prohibitive with the vaccines developed by Pfizer and BioNTech and Moderna. CHA encourages Catholic health organizations to distribute the vaccines developed by these companies.

“CHA applauds the work of the scientists who have developed these vaccines in a manner consistent with human dignity and will work to support efforts to educate the public about the importance of getting vaccinated.”

Dr. Ashok Seth: Leading Innovator in Interventional Cardiology

Dr. Ashok Seth stands at the forefront of interventional cardiology as the Chairman of Fortis Escorts Heart Institute, New Delhi, and the Head of the Cardiology Council for the Fortis Group of Hospitals. His groundbreaking contributions in the field of cardiology, particularly in interventional cardiology, have earned him widespread recognition both in India and around the world.

Pioneering Techniques and Innovations

Throughout his illustrious 30-year career, Dr. Seth has pioneered numerous angioplasty techniques, including Directional Atherectomy, Angioscopy, Stents, Thrombectomy devices, Drug-Eluting Stents, and the use of the Impella heart support device for failing hearts. His innovative approach has revolutionized the field of interventional cardiology, leading to successful implementations not only in India but also across the Asia Pacific region. Notably, his remarkable achievements have been documented in the 'LIMCA Book of Records'.

Global Recognition and Honors

Dr. Seth's groundbreaking work extends to his involvement in the development and clinical applicability of Bioresorbable Scaffold (BRS) Stents, a highly recognized technique worldwide. His unique contributions to the field have been honored with prestigious awards, including the National Honours of "Padma Bhushan" and "Padma Shri" by the President of India, the National Award of Republic of Spain "Officer's Cross Order of Isabella the Catholic", and the 'Mason Sones Award' from SCAI (USA), among numerous others.

Leadership and Professional Affiliations

Dr. Seth's leadership extends beyond his clinical practice. He has served as the President of the Cardiological Society of India and Vice President of the Asian Pacific Society of Cardiology. His global impact is further evident through his role as a Board of Trustee of SCAI (USA), where he served from 2007-2010, and as a member of various editorial boards of prestigious medical journals, including JACC Cardiovascular Interventions and Euro Intervention.

Educator and Mentor

Dr. Seth's passion for education and knowledge sharing is reflected in his extensive involvement in international training courses and meetings. He has conducted over 400 lectures and demonstrations on complex angioplasty techniques globally and has trained more than 350 cardiologists from India and abroad in advanced angioplasty techniques.

Legacy of Excellence

With over 250 publications in esteemed medical journals, contributions to textbooks, and recognition from prestigious universities, Dr. Ashok Seth's legacy of excellence in interventional cardiology continues to inspire and shape the future of cardiovascular care worldwide.

Matthew Tkachuk . 1 . Outrunning Karma

Word count: 3K

Song: Outrunning Karma by Alec Benjamin

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e4vD2S5vQMM

Today marks one month since I began working at this school. One month of teaching at a public school for the first time- one month of dealing with some of the best and worst kids I have ever met or taught.

“... but let me tell you guys, no matter what your previous English teachers might have told you, colors don’t always have to have symbolism. It could just be the author wanting you to visualize the object or situation more,” I explain, leaning back on my desk.

Despite this being a required sophomore English class, all of the kids look engaged and interested in the material. I’m not one to brag, but some of my previous students have told me that I’m the best teacher they’ve ever had because I talk and create activities that peak the students interest so that they want to learn the lesson.

I never tell them it’s because I spend hours scrolling through Pinterest, considering if each student would like each activity.

The bell rings signaling the end of the day and I glance over at the clock in surprise. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in whatever I’m teaching I don’t even notice the time passing me by. “Okay, well have a good night, everyone! There’s no homework tonight.”

I watch them leave the classroom, getting up to sit behind my desk and grade some homework and exercises I made the students do. I’m reading one of the essays about the book they read over the summer when the sound of heels clicking on the floor make me look up.

Anna Turner and I met in college. We had the same major, secondary education, but different minors because she teaches math and I teach English. When she found out that I was quitting my job at the all-girls Catholic school I used to teach at- for reasons I’d rather forget about- she begged me to apply at the public high school that she teaches at. As you can see, I got the job and decided to take it.

“How’s it going?” She asks, leaning over my desk.

“Good. I don’t have any students that have a grade lower than a C.” I do a fist pump in the air and she laughs at my antics.

“That’s good. So, Mr. Wright wants you in his office right now,” she tells me.

My eyes widen in surprise. At my last school, whenever you got called to the office you knew something bad was going to happen. I was only there once and for the reason that I was called in there for, I quit.

“Did I do something wrong?” I question.

“No, no you didn’t,” she reassures me. “Just go.”

So I follow her orders, making my way through the hallways with “hellos” to my students on my way to the small office at the back of the school. I knock on the door before opening it, immediately thrown off by the dim lighting in the usually well-lit office.

I’m startled by the sight of someone who is not Principal Wright behind his desk. Instead, it’s an attractive man who appears to be my age or maybe even younger. It’s obvious that his borderline-blonde-borderline-brown hair is naturally curly but he has it cut into a way that he can control it.

His eyes are a gentle mix of blue and green- it’s hard to tell what it actually is. His mouth parts, revealing a gap in between his top two front teeth which makes me swoon at the boyish vibe that he gives off.

When a smirk covers his face I snap out of my daydream about our seven kids, realizing that I’m probably drooling all over the floor at how hot this guy is.

“Oh, sorry, um, I’m supposed to be meeting with Principal Wright,” I stutter through, cursing myself for the lack of confidence.

“No, you’re not.”

My eyebrows furrow in confusion and nervousness rushes through me, both because of the confusion this situation is bringing and the fact that such a good-looking guy is staring at me right now. “I’m sorry?”

“Come sit down, Y/N.”

I’m immediately thrown off by the fact that this guy knows my name. How does he know me yet I don’t know him?

“Um, I’d rather not,” I deny as politely as I can, taking a step back. My back touches something and I freeze, my blood running cold. I turn around slowly to find a tall, looming man behind me. He smiles at me but it’s obvious by the gesture that I need to do whatever this stranger is telling me.

So I turn around, ignoring the fact that the smirk on this stranger’s face has grown, and reluctantly sit in one of the arm chairs in front of Mr. Wright’s desk. Or this guy’s desk, who knows anymore?

“How was class today?” He inquires.

I give him an odd expression, unsure of his intentions. I don’t know him and the fact that I’m pressured to talk to him in such a weird setting makes me unsettled. It’s also weird that he would pressure me into talking to him just to ask me about the students. That can’t be the only thing that he wants to know from this conversation, but I don’t know what else he wants to know.

“Good,” I answer simply, not positive of what to say or how much to give away.

“So, let me introduce myself. My name is Matthew, this school and I have a deal and since you’re going to stick around for a while, it’s time to inform you of, uh, what’s going on,” he begins. I grow more and more anxious with every word. “We provide protection to this school, since you know it’s not in the safest area of the city, and in return the school allows us to use the facilities and resources for our, um, how do I say this, activities.”

I raise my eyebrows in question to the ‘activities’ part but quickly shove them back down. By the way that he phrases it, the situation isn’t anything good, none the less legal, so it’s best to know as little as possible.

But really, the school allows this to occur on campus? With kids around? What if the kids see someone getting murdered or using cocaine, will the school pay for their therapy bills or can it afford court bills if they get taken to court?

“Now that you’re a part of the crew-”But I’m not-”You might have to do some things in order to keep your protection.”

From the way he says it, I know it’s not just protection from muggers or rapists on the outside. Now, it includes him and whatever gang or mafia or mob he’s a part of.

“Like what?” I find myself asking.

He grins at me, showing me that gap again. This time, it doesn’t make me swoon. Instead it makes my heart beat ten times faster. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it, sweetheart.”

He stares at me and I stare back at him. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what he wants me to say. I’m afraid to say anything in fear of saying the wrong thing- one wrong thing and I could get my head blown off. And I know if I open my mouth I just might start crying.

“Any questions?”

I shake my head silently.

“Okay. We’ll call you when you’re needed then. Or maybe stop by your apartment, depending on the time,” he responds, playing with one of Principal Wright’s pens. “Milan, show her out.”

The big man from earlier guides me back into the hallway all the while I can feel Matthew’s eyes on me. I take deep breaths to steady my breathing and it’s like I’m just going through the motions, packing up my stuff and driving back to my apartment.

My apartment. They know where I live. And I bet if I packed up and moved, they would figure out my address then, too. The mafia never lets you go once it gets its hold on you.

Troy: FaceTime?

I’ve never rejected a FaceTime call from my boyfriend. These days, those calls are too far and few between and I miss him more than I can put into words. It’s only been a year since he was transferred to Toronto but comparing that one year that he’s been away to the two and a half years that he’s been by my side, I can easily pick which one I prefer more.

Y/N: Not feeling well tonight, sorry.

I make my dinner, ignoring my phone vibrating beside me with an incoming text. I check it as I begin to eat.

Troy: What’s wrong?

I don’t respond to his text. It’s not like I can tell him the truth, that the mafia owns my work and threatened me. He would tell me to go to the police but it’s not that easy, Matthew probably has tons of people in his pocket, including the ones whose job it is to enforce the law.

I clean up my dinner, sitting down at the kitchen counter to grade an exercise I made the students write about an interesting thing they found out about their home city of Calgary.

The city of Calgary is run by a mafia called the ‘Calgary Flames.’ They’ve been around since 1972 and have had several leaders over the years, previously Mark Giordano and currently Matthew Tkachuk. You can recognize a mafia member by a tattoo all of the members have to get, which is a C with flames shooting out from it on the inside of their left ankle. They are famous for crimes like drug trafficking, money laundering, corruption of public officials, murder, and kidnapping just to name a few.

It feels like all of the air has been sucked out of me. This can’t be about the same person I met earlier, right? Sure, they share the same name and that Matthew does seem to be a part of something sketchy, but that’s just a coincidence. The Matthew that I’ve met and that I’ll have to be interacting with for who knows how long can’t be a part of something so- so vile.

I can’t imagine anyone doing any of those things listed. Those are all horrendous crimes and to do those around kids would make those people awful human beings. Well, there’s only one way I can tell if this is the same Matthew or not.

I need to see his ankle.

~

It’s a while before I see him again. The next time I see him I’m scanning through the pile of copies in my hands, frustrated by the fact that the copy machine didn’t staple the papers automatically once again.

“Hey Ms. Y/LN, was there any homework for the weekend?” The familiar voice of one of my students asks.

I lift my head to make eye contact, my blood running cold and I freeze in my place as my eyes meet Matthew’s. He’s standing next to Tanner, a student in my eighth hour, who asked the question, and it’s clear that he interrupted a conversation he was having with the older man to ask the question.

I know Matthew does business here but I didn’t expect him to actually communicate with the students. That seems like a boundary that he would know better than to cross, but I guess if he’s in the mafia he doesn’t know any boundaries.

“Um, I just wanted you guys to read chapters eight and nine of your novels for Monday,” I answer, crossing my arms protectively over my chest.

I watch the blonde’s eyes flicker down to watch the movement.

“Okay. See you Monday.” The sophomore shuts the locker, giving a lazy wave to the mafia leader before heading down the hall.

It’s like I’m stuck in place. I know I should move, I know I should avoid as much contact with Matthew as possible, but for some reason my feet won’t listen to my brain’s screaming.

He nods at me in greeting. “How are you doing today, Y/N?”

“Good,” I shift on my feet. I know I have to confirm whether he’s actually a mafia leader or not. If he’s not, he’s just some shady guy doing shady business at my place of work. If he is- well, I don’t even want to think about that.

The plan formulates in my head and I go to move forward, purposefully tripping over my feet and landing on the floor with a ‘thud’, all of the papers in my arms scattering throughout the hallway.

Just as I expected, as any person with an inch of compassion in their heart would do, he bends down on the ground to help me pick up the papers. I watch carefully as I pick up the sheets, eyes connected to his left ankle.

And there it is.

The student described it well in the writing, but it’s much more intricate and detailed up close. It’s a nice design, I’ll give him that, but knowing the terrifying meaning behind the symbol sends shivers up my spine.

All of my fears and worries are confirmed. The city’s mafia leader is standing in front of me, reaching out and expecting me to take his hand so he can lift me off of the ground. He wants me to touch his hands- hands he’s probably used to kill people with before.

He’s talking to me but it feels like I’m underwater. I can’t hear what he’s saying, all I can listen to is the thud of my heart and the static that my brain is creating with trying to think of a logical thought or reaction to this situation.

“Y/N?”

My body turns on it’s fight-or-flight instinct, and as I usually do, I decide to listen to the flight part. I take the papers out of his hand, being careful to not touch him, and mumble a, “Gotta go.”

I take off down the hall before he can react, reaching my classroom and practically slamming the door shut behind me.

Breathe, think.

“What happened to you?” Someone inquires.

My eyes snap up from the tile floor to see Anna sitting at a student desk. I know it’s not fair, but I can’t help but blame her. She’s probably known about the mafia’s involvement here all along and yet, she told me to get a job here. And she’s the one who sent me down to the office to meet Matthew.

I’ve been avoiding her for the past week, always making sure that I’m talking to a student or too busy to chat with her whenever I see her. I feel disrespected and hurt that she would put me in a situation like this.

I thought we were better friends than that.

I narrow my eyes at her, knowing that if I say anything it won’t be that nice.

She sighs. It takes everything in me to not sock her in the mouth because of that sigh.

“Listen, Y/N, I know you’ve met Matt now and-””How could you ever do this to me?” I snap, interrupting her.

“It’s deeper than you think-””Of course it is, he’s in the fucking mafia, Anna!” I can’t help but yell. “I want you out. I want you out of my classroom and out of my life.”

I can see the hurt burn in her eyes at my words but I no longer care. If she doesn’t care about me enough that she’s willing to risk my safety and well-being, I don’t want to continue a relationship with her.

“You don’t mean that.”

“I do.” I yank the door open for effect. “Get out. Now.”

She drags her feet as she leaves, like she thinks that I’ll end up changing my mind and suddenly decide that what she did was okay. I won’t.

~

“Hey,” Troy greets me as I answer his FaceTime call.

“Hi. I miss you,” I grin sadly, wanting nothing more than to be in my loving boyfriend’s arms right now. Having a long distance relationship is one of the hardest things that I’ve ever done.

“I miss you too. I wish we could’ve FaceTimed the other day,” he states, bringing up the fact that I left him on read when all he wanted to do was talk to me.

I sigh. “I wasn’t in the mood, Troy. And I’m not in the mood to talk about it today, either.”

He nods. “I can respect that. So… day…?”

My eyebrows furrow in confusion. Even though we are separated by three thousand miles and are in two completely different provinces, our calls usually have great connection with problems only if it’s raining outside. And judging from the clear skies in both of our backgrounds, that’s not a problem.

“What? Sorry the connection cut out,” I respond, deciding that it must be the wifi or something.

“I said… your…”

“Ask it again,” I request.

“How… today?”

I bite my lip out of frustration. After the rough day that I’ve had today and the unknown that’s coming tomorrow, poor connection when I’m just trying to rant and catch up with my boyfriend is the last thing that I want.

“The connection is just not working, Troy, I can’t hear you,” I admit.

“... not… fault!” His voice raises and the screen freezes, one frame replacing the other every couple of seconds.

“I don’t know why you’re yelling now.”

“Because…” The sound completely cuts out. Exhaustion hits me, from finding out that Matthew is in the mafia, to yelling at Anna, to getting into this argument with Troy. All I want to do is sleep and become refreshed for tomorrow.

“Troy, I’m getting tired, I’m going to head off to bed. Hopefully this connection will be better tomorrow.” I hang up the phone before he can say anything, knowing that I won’t be able to hear it anyways.

I know one thing. And that’s that I’m not ready for what’s coming tomorrow.