i'm so sorry

Time for my @deancaspinefest collab!! 😍 For this one, I got paired with the awesome @samanddean76 whose summary caught my eye in the claims gallery right away and gave me chills.

Their fic has everything: Dean being stuck in hell and caught in a horrible dream that has that classic, not quite right, looming feeling of dread where you're only dimly aware of not being awake; among many others, an encounter with Pizza Man Cas; BAMF!Cas saving Dean from hell and cradling his soul; Dean finally being allowed to CRY a lot of real tears ffs - and so much more. It provided so many prompts I've always wanted to draw anyway, so I did.

Crying Dean, my beloved. If you know me or even have worked with me before, you know that I'm both strong and horrible at my deadline game. (Many apologies go out to @samanddean76 for cutting it so close multiple times, thanks for being patient with me through this whole thing!! 😂) But I actually painted this Dean just a few hours ago and I'm so, so happy with him - I feel like I haven't captured his essence in ages, but now I'm finally close again... 🥺

Without further ado though, please give Well, I Never Been To Heaven a read!

Summary:

Dean Winchester is living a plain, ordinary, and boring life. Until one day a new student shows up in the little town of Spain, SD. It’s love at first sight, but then an unimaginable tragedy happens, and Dean is left alone in his misery. Or is he a student attending Oxford University on a full athletic scholarship who finds a familiar face in his coxswain? Or is he hiking in the desert and attempting to save a known stranger? Or is he a traveler who stops for the night at a cheap motel and finds the pizza man of his dreams? Or is he none of those things? Just an unwitting victim of fate and destiny? Castiel had led the assault on hell, in order to save the righteous man and prevent the first seal of the apocalypse from being broken, lest hell should be allowed to reign on earth. In the aftermath of his disastrous mission, he is being held captive by Alastair, and his image is being used in a final, determined attempt to break Dean. But the profound bond that Castiel feels towards the pure soul won’t allow him to go down without a fight, and he makes a desperate prayer to his very old friend to set in motion a chain of events that might save him and his beloved mortal, or possibly, doom them for all eternity.

P.S. Here's an alternative banner. BYE! :D

I can’t believe the Pizza Man Montage was from the actual fucking show like that’s exactly the type of shit you’d see from a fan edit/amv.

Making Supernatural fan art in the year of our lord 2023

I just remembered that episode where the previously on bit had cas “I learned that from the pizza man” and then a montage of Dean eating pizza. All of which had absolutely nothing to do with the episode. That was such an experience who was in charge of that hahahahaha

Wait. For real? Like that was a real thing that happens?! Anyone know the episode?!?!?

im so addicted to tomodachi life right now it isnt funny 😓

going to greatly enjoy taking this out of context

Hey!! Castiel is a boykisser!!! He kisses boys!!!

So I have a theory about sex pollen. There's all of these fan fictions about sex pollen and I never thought much of it until I became a fan of Mu Qing. When it comes to fucking or dying I'm pretty sure Mu Qing would rather die than break his cultivation path, just because he's a stubborn brat like that. Plus while I love him I respect his decision to keep his virginity because he really hates to lose. So how could Mu Qing be saved from deadly sex pollen?

Well we know in the real world that any time our bodies are infected with viruses or bacteria that our immune system tries to kill it or get rid of it. Fever, throwing up, feeling dizzy, etc... are all signs of our immune system fighting it. Sex pollen makes you feverish and gives you the almost unresistable urge to mate. Now why would a pollen have this effect on our body? And why is the only known cure to have sex?

Now we could look to the animal kingdom. There are in fact certain species that will go into heat and die if they don't mate. Perhaps the sex pollen reactivates long dormant genes in the human genome, but I do not believe this to be the case because as far as I'm aware only females can die from going into heat without mating. The fact that both males and females can be killed by sex pollen rules this theory out.

Another theory could be that the sperm/vaginal discharge is a cure but I don't think this is the answer. It doesn't seem to matter who you have sex with, you don't have to have sex with the opposite gender and you possess at least one of the two naturally in your own body. It's not like you have to seek out a certain type of person either. Literally anyone will do, unlike with blood donations or fecal transplants were someone has to be specifically selected for the donation based off of criteria.

It also probably isn't the mix of chemicals your brain releases when you have sex either, or else you could masturbate it away but you can't.

However everything in nature/the Supernatural exists for a reason. What is the purpose of a sex pollen ever coming into creation in the first place? Why is it not sexually transmissible? This question is what lead me to my theory. It was created to throw your spiritual energy out of balance and make the host weaker to drain their spiritual power more easily. The pollen itself is very aggressive and fast acting, it will weaken your spiritual power and demons can take your spiritual power like stealing candy from a baby. We don't really know where or how these sex pollen creatures come from so what if after absorbing all of the spiritual power from their victim they just grow from their corpse? That would make sense from a natural perspective since some fungi do the same thing to ants. They'll sprout from the body of their victim and release spores that the wind will carry away so the babies can grow and carry out the rest of their life cycle elsewhere. This would explain the motivation behind attacking humans in the first place. Humans probably have the most spiritual power out of any living creature and they need that spiritual power to procreate.

The cure for it is sex but only because sex is the fastest way to transmit spiritual power. Your body will naturally do whatever it takes to try to fight off invaders, and in this case your body knows that it is in so much trouble that it needs more spiritual power or else it's game over. There are two possibilities here. Either the other person's spiritual power keeps you alive long enough for your own spiritual power to recover after being so badly depleted so you don't die or the other person's spiritual power will help your own spiritual power fight off the sex pollen that it wasn't strong enough to handle on its own or maybe both?

So how could Mu Qing beat this without having sex? Well in the modern world I think a blood transfusion would work (though the amount of blood needed would have to be found out). You are literally putting someone else's spiritual power inside the effected body so it can use the spiritual power immediately. But Mu Qing isn't in the modern world. However a strong and skilled cultivator might be able to do this. Cut a deep wound on their hand and the hand of the effected. While holding hands the cultivator could send every bit of spiritual power they have to spare into the other person. This should in theory give the victim the boost that they need in order to fight off the sex pollen because the skin barrier has been removed and similar to sex the spiritual power is able to immediately go to work since it's inside the body. We have skin to keep things out of our body that aren't supposed to be there so I do not believe that basic touch alone would be enough, especially not for the average person. The spiritual power would decrease too much trying to fight its way inside to help. I do think that you could probably kiss your way out of it too, but because sex pollen causes the body to crave sex because it wants to get rid of the sex pollen ASAP it would be a risky move for Mu Qing because he might end up accidentally having sex and ruining his cultivation. So for Mu Qing the blood route is pretty much the only way to go.

6x10 Caged Heat

Can't stop thinking about how happy cass got when he thought it was Meg who he saw in the empty and then they way his smile instantly drops when it was actually just the empty wearing her face

still can not get over the pizza man montage

I love these ships so much there they best I can’t pick between Meg x castiel or Jo x dean there both so cute i love them so much and mad Jo and Meg died

Tell me who you want to be please Jo or Dean or Ruby or Sam or Castiel or Meg. Me I want to be rub and Meg.

There was no reason for this and yet, we got it.

Is it just me or is Sir Pentious x Cherri Bomb very Megstiel coded?

The two started as sworn enemies with flirty banter who eventually clear up that tension by kissing. Both Pentious and Castiel are hopeless romantics in love while Cherri and Meg are crazed psychos with a percent for violence but are also madly in love with their male counterpart.