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sarawritestories · 28 days

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Love Story (All To Well Chapter 1 Part 1)

Cassian X OC (Rhys' Sister), Eris VanserraX OC Rhys' Sister (Eventually)

Summary: Under the Mountain, Estella, have flash backs to her 50 years in captivity, and losing hope she will ever see her lover. That is until a human girl shows up and give her and her brother Rhysand something they lost decades ago...Hope and in a matter of mere months she is reunited with the love of her life. The General of the Night Court Armies.

Content Warnings: MINORS DNI 18+, dub con, whipping, poisoning, murder (I think this covers it if I missed something please let me know). Longing for loved ones, while in captivity.

A/N: This was going to be extremely long if I didn't break this up in two parts and I really wanted to get something out to you since I had been teasing this so much!

Word Count: 4.1K

All Too Well Masterlist ACOTAR MasterList

Romeo Save Me

“Hello Beautiful,” Amarantha cooed, circling around Rhysand's baby sister, Estella. The raven haired female held her chin high. “Rhysand, you didn't tell me you had a sister.” Estella's eyes glanced over to her brother. If he was panicked he didn't show it. Amarantha tsked, “Naughty boy, no matter she'll make a fine addition to the court.” Amarantha purred as her eyes grazed the black gown the Princess of the Night Court wore. The silver chains connected the two pieces of fabric at her hips revealing her toned, tanned legs, the neckline dipping to expose her stomach. A tiara of black and purple gems placed upon her head. An outfit she wore in the Court of Nightmares.

Did you know about this? Estella questioned her brother in the part of his mind he kept open for her.

If I did do you think I would have brought you here. Cassian begged me not to. I should have listened.

Amarantha snapped her fingers and the young princess felt hands grip her arms tightly, as fear flooded her system as the dreaded footfalls of the attor came into her line of sight.

Rhys…

I'm here, Little Star.

Estella glanced at the Attor's talon like hand. Faebane. Estella pressed her lips in a tight line, Rhys I'm scared.

She glanced over at his face and found no emotion there, the tick of his jaw the only indication that he was worried. Stay calm. I'm here, Stella. Just breathe.

Before Estella could take in a breath the Attor pinched her nose and instantly she began to struggle in the guards arms. The Attor's smile was sinister and would be the center of the young heir’s nightmare's to come. “Come now, Princess, open for me.

Estella, refused to open her mouth, her piercing blue eyes met the Attor's in pure defiance. Breaking eye contact she looked back to her brother to find Amarantha had wrapped her arms around Rhys pressing his back to her front as if it were a lover's embrace. “Come dear, don't be stubborn, or I may have to punish my new treat here.” She dragged a manicured finger down her brother's exposed chest and Estella maintained eye contact with the self proclaimed High Queen, as she nibbled his ear. To Rhysand's credit he didn't react to her advances he just stared at his Little Star.

Estella's lungs began to burn and her vision began to blacken around the edges and she opened her mouth to take her breath. Wasting no time the Attor poured the liquid down her throat, still pinching her nose as she had no choice but to swallow.

“Wonderful, guards take her away.” Estella watched as she planted a kiss on his cheek another tick in his jaw as they began to haul her away. “Don't worry Rhysand, We'll make sure she is comfortable and well taken care of.”

Before she let the panic settle in her bones she reached out to Rhysand once more; Rhys we need to put up the wards. Keep Velaris safe. Keep him safe. We have to do it before the faebane takes effect.

On my count Rhys voice echoed through there she could feel the beginning of the Faebane taking effect.

1…2…3…

Estella threw out her power to siphon the wards, draining to the dregs and she could hear the pounding of her shields. A familiar presence in the back of her mind.

Cassian she spoke in his mind.

Stella sweetheart, what's going on? His voice sounded distant in her mind as the poison was taking hold and she was being hoisted away.

It'll be okay. I'll be okay. Watch over Velaris for me won't you, General?” The young heir could feel her power suppressing itself. As if her power was trying to combat the drug coursing through her veins.

No I'm coming to get you his voice roared through Estella's mind though it sounded as though he was talking to her underwater. She fought back tears that were stinging in her eyes.

I love you, Cassie. Then she felt the connection being severed and she allowed herself a few tears escape her eyes as she was ripped away from her home, her family, her lover.

We Were Both Young When I First Saw You

“I don’t want to train.” Estella whined dragging her feet as Rhys held a firm grip on her hand as they approached the camp.

Frustration bubbling over Rhys turned around and gently cupped her cheeks. “My Little Star, I love you, I promised Father, Mother, and Astrea that I would protect you.” Estella fought her flinch at the mentioned, of their dead family members. Rhys tenderly brushed a strand of hair that fell loos from her plait and tucked it behind her pointed ear. “I almost lost you once. I won't let it happen again. Could you please try training with my friends? If you don't like it, then I'll leave it alone. I just need you to try.”

Estella quirked a brow as she stared into his pleading violet eyes. With a roll of her eyes and dramatic sigh she replied, “Promise?”

Rhys smiled and kissed her forehead, “Promise.”

With a slight tilt of her head, Rhys led her to the two Illyrian warriors that were standing at the center of the fighting ring. The young heir had yet to meet her brother's friends but had heard stories about his “brothers.” The two were giants compared to her, both warriors wore seven siphons a piece. The shorthaired one with blue siphons, Estella had seen in passing in Velaris before her brother became High Lord, his shadows were hard to ignore. She had never uttered a word to the Shadowsinger but heard his name whispered by the maids in their home: Azriel.

The warrior with the red siphons had his hair up in a bun, his wings rustled as the wind kissed them. His hazel eyes met her pale blue eyes and gave her a toothy grin that caused her heart to quicken. “Finally nice to formally meet the Princess of Velaris.” His deep voice seeped into her bones and warmth pooled in her belly.

Estella then scrunched her nose, “Don't call me that.”

The long-haired Illyrian smirked stalking forward, causing Estella to crane her neck to hold his pointed gaze. “What would you have me call you, Sweetheart.” Heat warmed her cheeks at the pet name.

“I'll call you a dead male, if you keep staring at my sister like that, you prick.” Azriel snorted at Rhys' response. “Stella, the shameless flirt in front of you is Cassian. The stoic one fighting his laughter is Azriel. I'm sure you've seen him around. Gentlemen, this is Stella.”

Cassian's leather clad hand picked up Estella’s and brought her knuckles to his lips, “A pleasure, Sweetheart, if you're ever tired of big brother Rhysie, come find me and we can play.” Rhys growled, as Cassian gave the young female a wink. She gave him a smile in return, then averted her gaze to focus on anything else.

Maybe training wouldn't be so bad after all.

I Got Tired of Waiting

A hand grazed Estella's waist. Sipping from her goblet staring at the High Queen, wearing the Night Court tiara that she ripped from the Princess' head when they first arrived 49 years ago. A male from the summer court pulled her close and whispered in her ear, “Warm my bed tonight, Angelfish.” His breath was sour, and Estella took a sharp breath as his hand gripped her barely covered ass.

She turned into his touch, breaking her gaze from the queen who was kissing her brother's neck. Placing her hand on the male's bare tanned chest, “It would be my honor.” She gave her best seductive grin as he leaned in and pressed his lips to hers. Bile rose in her throat, a feeling she had grown accustomed to since being there.

The male gripped her ass tighter, “I will retrieve you from your cell when I'm ready for you.” He whispered on her lips as if he was her lover. Another wave of nausea burned her esophagus as he pressed his lips to hers once more. A warm memory of kind Hazel eyes, calloused hands with red siphons atop them, and soft plush lips caressing hers bubbled to the surface. Estella forced the memory back down as the male swatted her bare flesh and walked away.

“Stella dear,” Amarantha's drawl felt like a snake slithering up Estella's spine. The young female met the Queen's gaze, her brother by her side his face a mask of cool indifference. “Come here.” Gritting her teeth the heir of the Night Court approached the dais her chin jutted out, the tiara on her head gleaming with the colors of her court. Trying to keep a semblance of dignity, though Amarantha's insistence that the top that only covered her breast and the gossamer skirt that barely covered her ass made her feel less than.

With the snap of the queen's fingers a male approached with a female their hands linked. Estella bowed, aware that her skirt was revealing more than she wished to the fae behind her. “Yes, your majesty.”

“Rise, dear, I have a gift for you.” Estella rose and the couple with their hands linked together smiled in her direction.

Breathe, Little Star Rhys' voice filler her head, Inhale she breathed in, Exhale she released the breath.

“This couple,” Amarantha's voice bellowed out, “Wishes for someone to join them in their bed this evening. You will go and they will do as they please with you.”

Shock flooded her system, so that was what her role was to be concubine…Cassian's face came to the surface and guilt laced her whole body. He will understand, Stella. We are not in a position to fight this.

Bullshit. The princess shook her head, “I will not, your majesty.” She held her head high. I cannot betray him like this, I will not. I'm sorry, Rhys.

Estella! Rhys scolded

Amarantha sneered, “I don't recall it being a request.”

Estella straightened her spine, “I don't care,” she retorted defiantly. “I will not lay down in someone's bed for their amusement.”

Amarantha rose from her throne her dark crimson skirts draping to the floor similar to blood dripping down a body. The Queen approached and Estella refused to cower. Amarantha approached her mouth upturned into a saccharine grin that appeared the most sinister. “Are you defying my direct orders, Princess?”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

“Very Well, Rhysand, bring me the Ash whip.” Color drained from Estella’s face. Her brother approached whip in hand and his mouth formed into a tight line. “Thank you, now you will give her 10 lashes for her disobedience.” The siblings heads whipped to the evil witch next to them. “Is that going to be a problem, Rhysand. I figured she would learn her lesson best if it was given to her by someone she cares for. Wouldn't you agree?”

Estella then met Rhysand's eyes, “I do, Your Majesty.” Turn around and close your eyes, Little Star. She did as Rhys told her and the crack of the whip wrung out in the entire hall. With each sting of whip against her skin, and whimper that slipped from her mouth, Rhys’ voice rang in her mind.

I'm Sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm so fucking sorry.

By the end Amarantha had ripped the crown from atop of her head, and the couple had carried her to their room and in spite of her bleeding back, had taken her, over and over again, until she passed out from the pain, where hazel eyes and dark long hair greeted her.

Romeo Take Me Somewhere We Can Be Alone

Estella sat up as the male swiped lazy circles around her stomach, “Would you like some tea?” She asked placing her hand on top of his stalling the movements.

The male hummed his eyes glazed from his orgasm. “That would be wonderful, Angelfish.” He gave a lazy smile that the young female returned and rose to gather her clothes and began preparing him a cup of tea. “Amarantha is generous to share you.” He praddled on as Estella placed the kettle over the flame, grabbing her tea mixture she made a few weeks prior. “I know she has her own whore that warms her bed.” Estella clenched her teeth as he kept talking, “Only to give the court his sister. Truly a gift.”

Estella closed her eyes as she schooled her voice in a calm manor, “I am happy to serve my queen and my court in whatever way is needed.” The words fell to ash on her tongue and tears burned her eyes as the kettle sung to life. Grabbing the kettle she brought it over to the cup with the tea mixture in it. Pouring the hot water and letting the tea steep for 2 minutes, Estella brought the tea to the male, “Here you go, Darling,” She purred. She slipped into his mind easily his mental shield down, Drink all of it for me. The male did as he was told and she cooed in his ear, “Good boy.” She ran her fingers through his light brown curls as his eyes began to droop.

A half hour went by, and Estella leaned over the male’s face, and found that his breathing had ceased and she could no longer hear his heartbeat. She patted his cheek, “This has been fun, Angelfish.” She got dressed and snuck out of his room and ran right into a finely dressed chest. She looked up and inwardly groaned, “Eris.” Estella tried to step around the Heir of the Autumn court when he stepped in front of her.

He smirked his russet eyes that glimmered with mischief, “Hello, Estella. Tell me how my Little Viper is, today?”

She glared at him, “I thought I told you not to call me that, Princeling.”

Eris grinned, “Well I can’t help myself. Tell me who was your victim today.”

Estella sighed, “No one of importance.”

Eris eyes darkened his fist clenched for a moment, “I highly doubt that.”

The princess of Night lowered her head slightly, “If I’m not back in my cell, I could be subject to a lashing so if you don’t mind, your highness.”

Eris slid out of her way, “Have a good night, My little Viper.” Estella shivered but moved past the red-haired Prince, without another word. winding the halls to her cell. Not noticing the Autumn prince sneaking into the room she came out of.

She arrived in her cell, and she found Rhysand standing in the middle of it. “Hey, you.” she said as she stepped onto the threshold of her prison.

“Hey, Little Star. How are you faring?” Rhys looked her up and down, assessing for injuries.

“Fine as always brother,” She got jittery and despite needing to put on appearances she hugged him. He wrapped her arms around her tightly. “I’m exhausted Rhys.” She whispered into his chest.

He pressed his hand to the back of her head and rocked her, “I know. I’m so sorry. Not a day goes by where I don’t regret trying to get you home. Or never bringing you to the Hewn City that day.” He whispered into her hair.

I miss them, Rhys. I miss him.

I know you do. I miss them too. “Tomorrow is Calanmai. Amarantha has granted me to leave.” Estella pulled away from her brother to stare at him and he read her face and shook his head speaking into her own, I can’t risk you being hurt because I attempted to escape. I won’t do it. It’s bad enough I have had to hurt you.

I don’t blame you; you know. She whispered in her mind.

I do…She makes me fuck her with your crown on...

Estella stilled at the brashness of his words, “Rhys...”

He hushed her as he kept her in his arms, “It’s okay.”

Will you stay with me tonight?

I’m not sure that’s a good idea.

Rhysie, please. Estella smiled slightly as he sighed.

I can’t deny you anything. Brat.

Rhys led her to the pile of hay in the corner of the cell and laid her down. The princess pressed her cheek against his heartbeat and Rhys began to rub her back. The two siblings sat in silence for a few moments. “Can you play the music for me, Rhys?”

Rhys smiled and kissed her forehead, “Sure thing. Close your eyes.”

Estella closed her eyes, “I love you.” Music began to play inside her mind, the musicians at the rainbow began to build their symphony and tears welled in her eyes.

Rhys’ voice was strained as he responded, “I love you too. Sleep. I will be here in the morning.”

Estella was beginning to be pulled into slumber when she mumbled, “No one likes a liar, Rhys.” And she fell unconscious to the sounds of her brother chuckling.

Beggin You Please Don’t Go

“You are not leaving this bed!” Cassian pulled her waist dragging her back closer to him the warmth of his bare tattooed chest seeping into her bones. “I don’t need to leave for Windhaven until tomorrow. It’s cruel that Rhys would prevent you from spending the rest of today with me.” He kissed her cheek hips moving down the slope of her neck. “I want to be with my girl.”

Estella giggled as he nibbled her neck, his hands clinging to her waist tightly as if the General of the Night Court Armies were afraid, she would slip from his fingers. “Cass, I need to make an appearance in Hewn City. Apparently, Rhys has been getting shit for it from Keir.”

Cassian turned her to face him. He caressed her cheek gently, “I could care less about Keir. I hate it when you’re there when I can’t be.”

“Because you’re an overprotective bat?” Estella quirked a brow and smirked that the general pushing a strand of hair behind his ear.

He chuckled and kissed her nose, “No, you brat. I just don’t want to be separated from you. Especially when you’re in a place with cruel males that look at you like you’re their next meal.”

She looked laughed, “So an overprotective bat.”

Cassian’s grin was laced with mischief, “Overprotective bat?” He began to tickle the young raven-haired female. Her laughs filled their shared space, “I’ll show you an overprotective bat.” He pinned her back to the mattress and continued her assault on her waist, his fingers tickling her to the point of tears sliding down her eyes. He began pepper kisses over her face picking up her tears.

“Cassian, I yield.” Estella panted and she tapped her hand on his forearm. He stopped and leaned down pressing his forehead to hers. “I yield.” She whispered.

“I can’t help being protective you know.” He whispered in return. There was a long-delayed pause, his eyes growing distant.

Estella growled, “Had I known you wanted Rhys’ attention so bad I would have shifted into him.” Cassian shook his head and flicked her nose and she smiled, “What did he say?”

Cassian sighed as he pressed his lips to hers, “That I can beat the shit out of him when you both come home.”

Estella’s brow furrowed, “I never wanted you two to be at odds, Cass.”

Cassian smiled and interlaced his large hand over hers, “Sweetheart, we have been friends for centuries, he’s stuck with me.” He kissed her nose once more, “Just like you are.” He grinned and she found herself smiling too. “I love that smile of yours.”

She tilted her head, “What else do you love about me?”

Cassian kissed her forehead, “I love your eyes,” He kissed her cheek and Estella closed her eyes. “Your lips.” He pressed his lips to hers. “Your kindness,” He pecked her jaw line, “Your compassion.” His lips moved to her neck, “Your bravery,” moved to the collarbone. “You, Sweetheart. I love you.”

The princess opened her eyes, “I love you too, Cassian.”

And I love you two, as well, but Cassian please get off my sister we must leave soon. Rhys’s voice filled our minds and the two of us laughed as Cassian placed another kiss to her lips.

“I’ll be home before you’re able to miss me, General.” Estella whispered.

Cassian sighed and placed his head in the crook of her neck. “I always miss you, Stella.”

You Were Everything to Me

The human girl was hanging against the wall, her fear flooding her scent. This was the human girl that Rhys had found in Tamlin’s court. Estella had a hard time breathing. As the Attor unleashed another attack on the girl. Rhysand was standing by Amarantha, his face emotionless, and Estella wanted to scream to lash out, to save this girl from the torment. She wrapped her arms around herself, as the screams of the human girl rang out.

Estella released a whimper when a smooth warm hand gripped the female’s hip. The scent of Autumn leaves and cinnamon overtook her senses. His thumb rubbed a circle around her bare hip. “Come to my chambers tonight, Little Viper.” Eris breath grazed her pointed ear.

Estella gritted her teeth, fighting away the tears as the sound of the broken screams rang in her ears while the Attor continued his torment, “Why? Why do you insist on tormenting me, Eris? Mor wasn’t enough for you?”

Eris’ hand stilled, his nose grazed her skin, and her heart raced. “What do you know about that day, really, My Little Viper?” He held her close to him, “I expect you in my chambers when this is done, Estella. I mean, immediately after, no getting those cute little concoctions from your cell first. Or I may let our High Queen know about what you like to do to the males who request your services.” He gripped her hip tighter than her and smirked as a spark of arousal flooded her. The feeling singed away when he removed his hand, and Estella reluctantly missed the comfort of his touch, as the human girl gave out a gurgled scream, causing the young female’s blood to run cold.

Hours of torment and Estella knew that those screams would haunt her forever. Her bare feet padded through the halls as an Autumn court sentinel led her to the Heir of Autumn’s chambers. When they reached the door Estella bowed her head, “Thank you.” She whispered and knocked on the door.

“Enter,” Eris’s voice muffled. The raven-haired beauty stepped inside, the red gown with a blunging neckline swished at her feet. “Hello, Viper.”

“Prick.” She retorted; her sharp blue eyes met his copper liked ones. “Let’s get this over with.” She began to pull the straps of her gown down when Eris raised his hand.

“I have no interest in sleeping with you Viper.” Eris rose from his chair; his orange vest lay over top his white tunic hugging his frame. His tanned pants tucked into his brown boots that looked as though they were recently shined. His red hair pulled halfway, and Estella couldn’t deny that he was the most beautiful man she had ever encountered, but he was a wild card and lethal and made Estella’s heartbeat erratically when he closed the distance between them. “I would like to keep my life intact thank you.”

Estella swallowed and her voice low, “Then what do you want with me, Princeling?”

Eris didn’t answer, instead his hands gripped hers and he pulled her into an embrace. The female blinked as Eris gripped her tightly. The kind gesture so foreign to her from anyone other than her brother in 50 years and the emotions erupted in her. She gripped the back of his vest and buried her face in his chest and erupted into sobs. Estella had no idea why he was doing this, or how he knew she needed this, but for this moment she allowed herself the comfort of letting out a half a century worth of feelings into his chest. As Eris rested his head atop hers, hand stroking her dark hair. His other hand rubbing her back almost soothingly.

After a few moments Eris picked her upholding her knees and her back and walked her over to the bed and he leaned against the headboard as the Princess of the Night Court sobbed into the chest of the Prince of the Autumn Court. The latter whispered soothing words in her ear and warmed his hands as an extra comfort for the Princess until exhaustion took over and the viper fell asleep in the arms of the fox.

Part 2

Story Tags: @milswrites @eve175 @melsunshine @believinghurts @awkardnerd @historygeekqueen @mischiefmanagers @mybestfriendmademe @cauldronboilmetakemetovelaris @glitterypirateduck @littlestw01f @mal-adaptive-dreams @lilah-asteria @hellodarling1357

#cassian x reader #cassian acotar #acotar #acotar fanfiction #cassian imagine #cassian fanfic #cassian x oc #rhysand sister #eris vanserra #eris acosf #eris x oc #eris acotar #eris x reader #eris vanserra acotar #Spotify

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witchysquirrel · 2 months

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Epiphany Masterlist

A Cassian x healer!OC fic

Summary: Cassian and Ravenna have been friends for centuries, Ravenna's work as a combat healer for the Night Court consistently throwing her into Cassian's path. When Cassian sustains a grave injury in the heat of battle, Ravenna's healing takes on heightened significance. As the two navigate his rehabilitation together, their relationship begins to transcend their previous friendship, and a connection begins to form that binds them in ways beyond words.

Themes include: friends to lovers, trauma, sex, angst, fluff, and everything in between. Note that this is mostly for my enjoyment, I'm taking massive creative liberty at times and that's okay with me. If it's not for you, no worries, but if it is I hope you enjoy!

- Work in Progress -

18+: read at your own discretion. Themes of violence, sex, trauma, etc.

*Asterisks* indicate chapters that contain smut.

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen*

Chapter Fifteen*

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sapchat · 3 months

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The Lord's Daughter

Cassian x Devlon!Reader

Synopsis: You’re Lord Devlon’s daughter, which definitely won’t cause any issues. Right? Fluff and Angst

Warnings: Devlon, misogyny :D, abuse, wing clipping, also you’re somewhat of a housewife because I read to many stories of people that end up with Cassian, Azriel or Rhys where they want to train and be strong. You can be strong and take care of a house, fuck that fighting shit. Also, I use female terminology, but you could read it as a more feminine male, FtM or even MtF if wanted.

Words: 7.6k

The High Lord was coming to the house for a meeting, and then dinner. Father stated they were to talk about the camp, what the High Lord wanted to change, to talk about the girls training. Father stated it was because ‘that bastard general of his’ has reported once again the girls aren’t training. The other lords of Windhaven have all agreed that the girls can train just after their chores.

The only issue with that is the males of camp have just been giving us more work. So where I used to have time to myself to read, or play piano, I spend most of my day now doing chores and helping the younger girls of camp.

I don’t mind it, truly, it helps them out to do what they want. Train. I just don’t have an interest, and it’s not because my Father believes a female’s place is the house, I just don’t enjoy it. I’ve spent enough time helping patch up the warriors in the infirmary to know I want nothing to do with it.

I’d rather be a ‘housewife’ likely to the High Lord’s displeasure.

It doesn’t help that the General has been pestering all the girls lately to see why none of them are training.

It doesn’t help he pestered me before about it. Just before Rhysand became the High Lord. That thought caused me to look to my father, who had been in the sitting room sipping his whiskey.

“Father, do you know how many will be attending the meeting and meal? So, I might be prepared?” I ask, and the look on his face either turned to anger because I interrupted his thought or because of who will attend.

“The bastard lord, and his two-bastard ilk will attend. Not sure about his whore cousin.” He answered and downed his glass. Yea the anger is from the guests.

I wiped my hands on the apron I wore and untied it to set to the side, “Is there anything you’d specifically want for the meal? I can head to the butcher’s tomorrow when he opens. And I believe that the Huxley’s just finished canning and harvesting some of their vegetables for the season, I can stop and see what they have.”

“Get something from a pig. Just what they need to remind them what they are. No better than anyone else. Just nicer versions of pigs.” He poured himself another glass. Three fingers full this time.

“Pig sounds good, it’s been a little while since I’ve made a pig roast. I get some beans and potatoes to mash with it if that sounds good father.” If I’m to roast an entire pig for dinner, then I’ll have to go to the butchers early. Hopefully Elias can help bring it to the spit for me.

Father just grunted in reply, I’ll have to see what good alcohol I can find on short notice to serve. Possibly a cheap wine for me in order to get through it all.

Father was to spend most of the day showing the High Lord, the General and the Shadowsinger how the troops were, and how the girls’ training were proceeding, whilst I prepped the house for dinner. Turns out a pig roast doesn’t take as long as one would think to cook.

So, I got to spend some of my morning and afternoon outside tending to it and watching the camp show what they’ve learned. What new techniques have been taught from the war, whilst some of the girls stood to the side doing simple maneuvers like breathing or stretching.

It was strangely beautiful seeing the males move how they did. Like it was a dance whilst they were paired off, a dance that turned bloody and violet sure, but a dance nonetheless.

I tried my best to ignore the eyes of the three guests but at some points it couldn’t be avoided, and I’d quickly look away and go back to peeling my potatoes. Like a game of camp and mouse, except each time I’d glance there’d be some type of questioning look in one of their eyes. The General’s.

Whilst one of the three would pop in for a visit to the camps occasionally, I was never around. I’d just hear my father’s complaints later. With the occasional slap if it was a real grueling day. They weren’t the worst punishment you’ve received from the man. By the time it gets to the point he wants to slap he’s had a few glasses full, and he doesn’t have much strength.

Besides he wanted me to look beautiful so he could still possibly find me a husband. Being the camp lord’s daughter did have its benefits. A pick of husbands, not that I’d get to chose but, and less beatings than some of the other women. Because whilst father would have rather had sons, he only has me. And as cruel as he can be I can say he doesn’t hate me. Detest me for not having a cock, sure.

But I am still his child.

Cauldron, part of me thinks just a little he hates he clipped my wings. He’d done it properly, thankfully. Had the best healer tend to it, so I still have functions in my wings and no real pain. Many of the girls and females in camp can’t say that. I’ve tended to many of them after the fact of how mangled their fathers make them. How they can barley even function.

The High Lord has attempted to ban wing clipping, imposing harsh punishments on those who still do it. It hasn’t stopped many of the fathers from clipping in secret. Which has caused more injuries than needed. It doesn’t help many of the males of camp beat their wives and daughters.

No wonder some many of the fae hate us. No wonder the High Lord and his friends hate coming around. Maybe that’s what the meeting is about. More changes to make to the camp. I’m sure father will love that. Something I’ll have to listen to until the next demand the High Lord makes.

I’d been so busy peeling and cutting up potatoes I didn’t see the massive imposing figure next to me. Red siphons littering his body, stature casting a shadow over my body, wings just posed enough to not be aggressive but catching my attention.

“Why aren’t you training with the other girls?” It was the General, Cassian, who had walked up to question me. And I’m shocked to find him talking with me. I’m trying to remember when the last time it might’ve been, and the only time I can think of it was around the time of their Blood Rite at a bonfire.

The war came not long after that, and then once it ended, I started taking care of the house more. Learning how to be a good wife from my mother, learning from some of the healers how to care for wounds.

“I’m peeling potatoes…” It’s the most obvious thing that I’m doing. He can see the potato in my hand, the others that had been peeled, and the skins on the ground around me.

“The girls of camp are to train just everyone else. So… why aren’t you training yourself?” He asked again, as if it’s the strangest thing in the world to not want to train. To rather cook, clean and care for a home than fight and get bloody and bruised.

“Because I’m prepping for dinner. After the meeting with the High Lord.” It’s a simple answer, one anyone should be able to guess, especially the General.

“Lord Devlon has been instructed that all girls of training age, or those that wish to, train before doing chores.”

“I know the rule Lord Cassian,” He cringes lightly at the title, “My father tells the camp of the rules the High Lord has created and has been enforcing. Believe it or not, I am not of training age nor do I want to train. I am perfectly content doing what I have been.”

The General almost seemed shocked at what I said. And just as he went to add something else, someone called him back to the others. He looked at the voice, then back to me, as if he was going to ignore them. Continue to question me; but he left.

Once he left, I took the food inside, to finish cooking it. The Generals presence reminding me of that bonfire. What the night brought, what rare fun you got to have. Before many of you had responsibilities for the real world….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Flashback~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“If your father finds out I allowed you to go out tonight he’d have both our heads.” My mother had stated glancing hesitantly at me from over the counter.

“Well, father is going to be in meetings with some of the camp lords, and other males of camp. Hence why this party is happening tonight.” I told her, the crunch of an apple piece ending my statement from the fruit she had given me for a snack.

“You’re not going to do anything… reckless are you? Nothing to…-“

I interrupted her, “Mother I’m not going to sleep with anyone. My pureness will be intact when I leave the house and will still be present when I come back. You’ll have no issue marrying me off. Even then, you and father are still able to have children.”

My mother had walked around the counter and pulled me into her chest, kissed my head and stated, “Why would I ever try to mess up perfection?” She had always said I was the best thing she made; no other child would be able to compare.

By the time I had gotten to the party it was in full swing, liquor and ale being passed around in cups, people sneaking off to the shadows to feel or hook up.

I had just planned on seeing some of my friends, only have maybe one or two drinks, I hadn’t expected the heir to the Night Court to be there. Which meant his two shadows would be around him too, both bastard low-born males, one who fought for his place in Windhaven and slid his way to the heir’s side. The other, the one everyone says was kissed by flame and shadow, who was dropped off here by his father’s guards as a favor to whoever his mother was. Just because the Lady of Night was a family friend.

The three of them weren’t much older than I, maybe by a few years, they were nearing the age and power to compete in the Blood Rite, where many Illyrian males aim for the age of 30 to compete. The name is self-explanatory, it’s a rite of passage where lots of blood happens.

I had spotted the long-hair male, I believe his name is Cassius or along the lines, standing by the fire passing a cup of ale to another female. Brushing through the crowds, I made my way over looking at the different drink options feeling hazel eyes looking at me.

Without even looking at the person staring I ask, “Going to give a suggestion or just keep starring?”

“I mean either works for me. Which allows me to stare longer?” Cassius… Cassiel… shit what is his name…

“Hmmm… giving a suggestion allows me to sip something as you stare.” I finally turn to look at him, and realize how much taller he is. He’s standing at least a head over me, if not two heads. Maybe a head and a small head.

“Ale is always a good choice. If you’d like something harder, a whiskey mixes or rum. Something sweet, I saw someone walk by with wine earlier so that’s somewhere… Cassian by the way.” CASSIAN! That’s his name.

“Y/N, and I’m okay with ale. My mixed drinks either varies by too strong and mainly the liquor or not enough and its basically just soda.” He nods his head and takes to pouring me a cup, getting no foam in it before handing it over.

“So, Windhaven native orrrr….?” He asks, and I can’t tell if he expects to end the night in my pants or not. If he actually just wants to get to know me.

“Native, my father is one of the lords sooo. Kinda have to follow the line. Only reason I got to come tonight was the meeting.”

“Yea, that was the main reason for this soiree. Helps that the High Lord is there taking the attention off of us to do it.” My eyes widened just a little, not realizing that the Lord of the Night Court was present.

“I didn’t realize he was coming to that meeting… how do you know that, figured it’d be a bit of a secret.” I watch as he points off to the side, following his direction I see how he knows, the heir, Rhysand is against a tree. Kissing another male with a female between them.

“He’s… committed?” I don’t even know how to describe it, and whilst it wouldn’t be me… I won’t judge others. That’s wrong.

“Oh,” the sharpest grin spreads on Cassian’s face, “He’s a very committed High Lord.”

“I’m sure the Night Court will be in… loving hands?” It’s a questionable laugh, one I hope doesn’t offend him or his friend.

“He will be, he’s got plans. Hopes to make Illyria a better place. But none of that, you’re drinking with one of the next Carynthian!” He’s proud of the statement, as if knowing he’s going to win no matter what.

“Oh, you’re competing this coming spring? Are… are all three of you doing it?” It’s a simple question, one because I know my father has already complained about them signing up together. It’s somewhat nice seeing others give him a headache rather than I.

“You can bet you’re sweet ass.” My eyebrows raise as I blink at what he exclaimed, “We all plan to complete it together. We started as one, we’ll end as one.”

“That’s… sweet. To many Illyrians die during it… To much blood shed just to come out on top just to come out with bragging rights.”

Cassian shrugs as if it isn’t too much of an issue. “Everyone in this camp is out for someone’s blood. The blood rite keeps everyone… sated. It’s a way to get rid of your enemy’s or people you hate without having to deal with a punishment from Lord Dickhead. Illyria is awful anyway with how everyone gets treated, if there weren’t challenges or the blood rite, we’d never be an army. Be to busy fighting each other.”

He's right but the name ‘Lord Dickhead’ throws me off… he’s not talking about…? “Lord Dickhead?”

The biggest grin ever splits across his face, and that’s how I know 1. He’s talking about my father and 2. He doesn’t know I’m his daughter. “Lord Dickhead, Lord Devlon. He’d answer to both I think.”

It had caused me to laugh, Windhaven is a big camp so not everyone realizes that my dad is one of the lords, let alone realize I’m his daughter. We talked more that night, but Cauldron knows I can’t remember. The ale was pretty strong, and I hadn’t drunk much before. But I do remember the night ended with a sloppy kiss.

We had moved to just the outskirts of the party, and he made a comment about going to be the best warrior the camp has seen. His goal was to be a general one day. And I had made a silly little comment about me being the fair maiden and him being the amazing knight.

He told me that the knight always gets a kiss before and after saving the maiden. So, he said he earned a kiss before the Blood Rite. So, I risked it. One of the only times I ever risked my status and the ire of my father.

I pressed my lips against his, hesitantly. He cupped my cheeks in his hands, tilting his head just slightly and pressed his lips against mine a rush of heat flowing through me. My brows furrowed just as he ran his tongue along my lip and in my confusion, I followed instinct and raised my hands to cup his face.

It had been a hot, hungry rushed kiss. My first kiss, something no other male got from then on. The war came after, among a thousand other things. But it always felt like a part of my soul was missing from then on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Present~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I had been so lost in my daydream I had finished the potatoes. The type of ‘blackout’ where you just rely on muscle memory and continue doing whatever you were and come back out after going “Oh I actually cooked those right and didn’t just imagine it right?”

I quickly started setting everything out on the table, laid out the glasses, with a pale of ice cubes if wanted and the slightly expensive whiskey I found set out as well.

And just as I finished stirring the mashed-up potatoes, I heard my father lead the males in. In walked the High Lord, the Shadowsinger and Cassian. I walked into the doorway of the eating room, watching my father lead them in, the whiskey and glasses already on the table from earlier today.

My father nodded to me, seeing that everything was out for them already. He then turned to the others and nodding in my direction and three sets of eyes lay on me. Each holding different twinkles in their eyes. “I’m not sure if you all remember back from, you’re all’s youth, but this is my daughter. Y/N Devlon.”

The High Lord’s and Shadowsinger’s expressions stayed neutral, but Cassian’s eyes widened just a bit. Either from realizing that I would in fact know the rules because of me being his daughter. Or because he finally remembered who I was.

Either way I bowed just enough to be respectful, “Hello. Dinner is ready, and I left the option of drink choices. I hope everything is to your guys’ liking.” The Shadowsinger’s gaze glanced over the table, likely trying to see if anything would be poisoned but his gaze stuck on the roasted pig sat out, glistening with juices.

As if realizing what caught the shadowsinger’s attention, the High Lord and Cassian’s attention moves to it as well. Cassian only really seemed to have an issue with it, his teeth clenched and fist slightly clenched.

The High Lord took it in stride however, “Devlon, I’m glad you remembered how much I loved a roasted pig. Did it come from the Collymore family? They still have their butcher shop don’t they?”

My father leaned over his seat, and poured himself a glass, “You are correct Rhysand, the Collymore’s still have their butcher shop, their son has helped take it over. Truly it was them to remember your love for pig. Too many of you boys I raised and sent off to remember it all.” There’s a little eye twitch in his eye at the dig. “Please sit. Let’s not let this meal go to waste.”

I helped pour glass for the males, asked if anything else was needed before being waved away by my father. Walking back into the kitchen for my own dinner, I felt eyes follow me.

My own meal was smaller, consisting of really only the sides, pork wasn’t my favorite choice of meal, especially when it came to having to look at the face of a pig while eating. I spent most of dinner trying to ignore the conversation happening one wall over.

Voices varying in differing heights as disagreements and agreements happened. Why they elected to have a meeting over a meal? I’m not to sure. Doesn’t seem like much eating is actually happening. And as the person who cooked the meal, it kind of upsets me that my work is going to waste.

I could see the little shadow join me in the kitchen as I ate. Giving me some company, granted I’m sure it’s reporting back. As soon as that thought happens, it shoots off and another replaces. At least I think it’s a different one.

I’d been so distracted by the noises from the other room and the little shadows I didn’t see the massive frame entering the kitchen from the back. I jumped a good foot when I heard him speak.

“Why didn’t you say you were Devlons’ daughter?” General Cassian.

“Pardon?” It comes out quickly, just with one breath as I stare at him. His wings flexing with a slight irritation to them.

“You know what I asked.”

“Are you talking about earlier today or when we first met?” It’s a good question. Simple enough that if he doesn’t remember then I don’t have to possibly deal with the fact we drunkenly kissed. Or I can let him have some panic for calling my father ‘Lord Dickhead’. Even if that shoe fits.

“That depends. When do you think we first met?” I just slightly narrow my eyes, then glance in the direction of the dining room and back. What’s his game? And how do I play?

I’ve grown up around these warriors. Whilst I’d rather stay at home, I can bite back. “’Lord Dickhead.”

A saccharine smirk grows across his face, a glistening white canine peaking out. “What would Devlon thing about his daughter kissing an Illyrian bastard?”

“He didn’t know. The only one who did was my mom. Maybe your friends. But I never said a thing. I don’t kiss and tell.”

“That why you don’t train? Because he’s your father and he doesn’t allow you to?” He seems almost pissed as if it’s my father not letting me train.

I finally set my fork down with my plate and glare, “If I wished to train with everyone else. I would. It’s my choice whether I do or not. The High Lord doesn’t require me to train, he just states that the girls that wish to train, do. And I don’t want to.” My wings have started to flare just lightly, likely the only amount of dominance I’ll ever show.

He glances at my wings, eyes narrowing as if now realizing that my wings were clipped. A slight growl coursing through his chest. “So doesn’t allow you to train and clipped your wings. Wonder how Rhys would feel about him breaking both rules he’s imposed.”

I pull my wings back in close and tight to my back almost self-consciously before saying, “My wings are none of your business. It especially doesn’t concern the High Lord. What I do is not any of your business either. If I wanted to train, I would.”

“It matters if the Lord of this camp is breaking the laws that have been imposed by the High Lord. Rhysand has explained in great detail what the punishments are for wing clipping, and for not allowing the girls of camp to train.” I understand they want change. I do. But the punishments he’s talking about is either a beating or death. To “prove a point” they just kill them.

We’re in silence for a few minutes, him waiting for me to bite back likely. And when he seems to think I won’t, he turns to leave. To go back to his precious High Lord, but as he hits the doorway something makes me open my mouth, “They were clipped before I met you. Even before the bonfire.”

It makes him pause, but he continues back to the dining room.

It’s a week later until I see him again. I had been walking around the farmer market the camp has. And he seemed to be walking around buying some of the food, either for a quick lunch or just to support some of the families of Windhaven.

So, being the peace maker, I try to be, I go up to him, “Hi.” Simple, if he wants, he can ignore me, or he can engage.

“Y/N. How are you?” Okay so not an immediate ‘fuck off’ so that’s good.

“I’m doing great! How about you?”

“Good.” Okay so maybe he’s just being polite.

“…What brought you to the market today.” He just glanced at me, and it’s really making me rethink trying to be nice.

“Have you been over by the Monroe stall since being back at the camps? Cade and his wife Calliope run it now. I think he did the Blood Rite a couple years after you.”

He sighs, “What are you doing?” He just barley looks down at me, an emotion in his eye I can’t pinpoint.

I just shrug, “I don’t know, I figured you’d maybe like the company. I know you’re not the most popular in the camps all considering. Plus, that first time we met we were friends,” I look down at that, “At least I think we became friends. Even if it was just for that short time! I didn’t really see you after…. And I know the second time we met it was tense, but you were eating dinner with my father-“

He cuts me off, “Whilst you were eating the bare minimum in the kitchen. Alone.”

My eyebrows furrow just lightly, “I couldn’t really eat with you guys. You were discussing camp policies. Not really a place for me.”

“Because you’re a female?”

“No, because I don’t know anything about camp policies. It wouldn’t make sense for me to be there. It’d be like if I showed up for a war meeting. No reason for me to be there.” It makes sense in my head so I would think it makes sense in his.

“That’s your home. You prepared the meal; you welcomed us into the home. You should have sat at the table and ate.”

“Can I ask something General Cassian?” It’s something I want to know. But his face makes me smile just a little.

“You can just call me Cassian; but yes.” It’s almost a grumble with how he answers.

“Why does it bother you so much? How I decide to do things with my life?” He pauses in his step as if debating something. Either to answer or to tell me.

“That night. The… night of the ki- of the bonfire.” He rephrases his statement as if remembering we’re around others of camp. As if he realizes if anyone overhears, my virtue will be in question. My reputation in the camps, ruined. “I… I know we’re older. Now. But I thought I felt something… that night. Something deep in my soul. And then you were gone, the Blood Rite happened, then the war.

Just to find out you were under my nose the entire time. Did you know that Rhys didn’t know Devlon had a wife, let alone a child. One so close in age. Let alone one who’s wings had been clipped, doesn’t train with the other girls and females of camp.”

“He doesn’t have a wife anymore. My mother died not long after the war ended. And I told you the other night that my wings were already clipped the first time we met.” I sharply turn in front of him, “Also, I didn’t realize I had to inform you who I was when we met. I don’t usually walk up to people go ‘Hi my names Y/N, my father is Lord Devlon lets go make out!’ When we met, we were nobodies. You didn’t have a title, such an important role, so many responsibilities. So, I stayed out of the way. No matter what I might’ve felt that night.”

It's like a ripple is sent out. Something in the wind has changed. But all we can do is look at one another. Both breathing slightly heavily from what’s been shared.

Cassian looks away for just a second, nostrils flaring. “Is that why you didn’t come around? Because I’m a bastard? A fatherless motherless brute with no standing?”

I scoff at what he’s trying to imply, “Why would your parents matter to me? I didn’t come around because 1. How did I know you wished me to? You were sent to the Blood Rite the night after, then the war came, Rhysand became the High Lord and you left. 2. You forget that even though my father is Lord Devlon, I am a woman, a daughter to a brute that cares more for this camp than I. I have no standing which is something I’ve accepted.”

“So, I just assume I’m supposed to sit here and believe, that even when I was not a general, you would’ve had me? Would’ve let me court you?”

“YES!” I exclaimed, the few people still wondering around the market glancing in our direction. I hold my stuff a little tighter before glancing back at Cassian’s eyes, “Come on, follow me before we get into any more trouble.”

The winged male slowly followed behind, as if he were a child that had gotten in trouble. Luckily, father was to be with the ‘troops’ and wouldn’t be at home until late. So, we would be left in peace for a bit.

“Won’t Devlon get pissed your in here unchaperoned with a male?” He’s almost hesitant in walking into the house, as if he’ll be run off for just walking in.

“Believe it or not, even though I’d rather stay in the house and raise kids than fight, I am allowed to make my own choices. Much to my father’s anger.” There’s just the smallest smile that graces his face, it lights up as he does.

“Is that why you don’t want to train? Because you would just rather keep house than be a warrior?” It’s as if he’s finally understanding me, finally realizing that everyone wants something different.

“I’m an only child, I always begged for siblings, always played with babydolls, or played house. My mother couldn’t have anymore kids, I never truly knew why I just know she couldn’t. Because of that, I spent most of my time playing ‘mom’ with different things and people. That’s all I wanted to be… Then my mother passed away after the war, that disease that passed through the camps, remember? The dreams of a sibling kind of… shattered, unless father remarries.

Then the High Lord became the High Lord, started changing the rules of the camps, trying to make change. Think what you want about my father, I know how he seems and gets viewed, but he’s always been like that distant in his own way. Cass, I wish I was one of the females of camp that wanted to train, he’d allow it if I truly wanted to, but I don’t. It’s not something I want for me, I want to be in the home taking care of people, raising kids if I get to have them. And if that’s not something you can accept… then I don’t know if there could be an… us.” I glance up towards him, and the most heartbroken look is on his face.

“I couldn’t care less if that’s what you truly want. I only cared because I thought you were being kept from what you wanted to do. I didn’t know you truly didn’t want to train, I thought you were being forced to keep house. That’s why I was pushing for it so much, that’s why I cared.” He still has the look on his face, as if I’ve killed his mate…. Wait….

“Earlier… you said something… about the night we… kissed. That you thought you felt something… What did you mean?” It’s like a white sheet has draped over him, his tan Illyrian skin lighting to an unhealthy look.

“It-it’s nothing. Just I don’t know Y/N we were drunk, but I just feel like-“ He’s twiddling with his fingers as I interrupt him. Something I never picture the general doing, the famed Prince of Bloodshed.

“It felt like something more? Something… in the making, or in the forming?” His hazel eyes make contact with mine, an almost knowing glint in them. Like he’s already thought that’s what it was, although there’s still a look of fear.

“I’m not sure if that’s what it is. The only experience I have with mates is Rhys’ parents’… and they weren’t… the best examples. I just know that night I felt something, and ever since then it felt like something’s been missing. Until we met again, and that feeling came back.” I chew on the corner of my lip, chewing on the skin some.

“So… are we mates?” That beautiful grin is back on his face, the color her lost coming back to the usual tan.

“I think we’re mates.”

Right as he says it, as if talking about it summoned it, that beautiful golden bridge is formed between us.

It’s been almost a week since the mating bond formed between us. Something that I’ve kept away from my father, which Cass has been in full support of. He has started to buy and give me courting gifts, which I can’t tell if my father noticed and is ignoring or not. Granted I did want to put feelers out at dinner tonight.

“Father?” I hope my tone isn’t as anxious as it sounds, but I fear it might be.

“What would you like Y/N?” He asks still reading the report he has in his right hand as he eats.

“Would....” How do I approach this? “Would it be okay if someone… started to court me?” This makes him pause mid-chew, and it’s then I start to wonder if maybe he is just slightly more male than I thought, than I saw.

“Is there a male in the camps courting you? Because if so, they should be coming to me for permission. Who is it?” Okay yeah maybe I shouldn’t have brought this up.

“I don’t think it’s actual courting, I just think someone has been giv-leaving gifts for me. Just little things that usually get seen as courting gifts. I just wanted your opinion on it father.” Simple, appeasing to his pride.

“I’m not sure which game you’re playing child, but if someone does wish to court you, then the proper way is through talking with me and allowing me to approve it. Are they a respectable male? The one leaving gifts.”

He doesn’t believe he’s respectable, but he’s more respectable than the males in camp. “What if they’re my mate? I know it’s rare, but if The Mother and Cauldron wished it, would you still accept them?”

My father stops chewing once again, as if getting tired of my questions during our usual meals. “You’ve been reading to many of those books again, haven’t you? They still need to speak with me if they wish to court you. Mating bond or not.” Okay so maybe he will accept Cassian then! “But if he is not a male of good standing, then it won’t be happening. I won’t have my child marrying some bastard, mating bond or not.” Shit.

“The books bring me joy father. Something to do once I’m done with my chores.” Entice my father with the sweet words for the females of his time, where we’re happy with doing chores. Which for me I am but still.

It wasn’t until hours later when I go meet Cass that I told him.

“How’d your father take it?” He asks, wrapping me up in his arms holding me close to him. The bond thumping along our chests, even unmated and it thrives with life.

“I chickened out… Don’t look at me like that! I asked how he’d feel if someone started courting me, and he said he wanted them to come to him to ask permission. So, I asked what if they were my mate. But he said if that was the case, even so rare it is, that he’d technically allow it, unless they weren’t in ‘good standing’.” Cass lightly pushes me slightly away from him to look at me.

“So, your father’s definitely not going to allow me to court you. My mate. I knew your father hated bastards but…” He sounds upset about the fact, which is understandable.

I look up and run a finger along the length of his nose, “You could always rescue me, be the amazing knight again and me being the maiden. Take me away to the Moonstone Palace safely tucked away.” He gets some kind of guilty look on his face at the mention of Moonstone Palace.

“Is that what you’d want? For me to take you away from your father, bring you back to my home with me?” he’s sincere in his question, and I know he’d do it in an instant.

“I wanted my father to approve. I wanted him to be okay with our relationship, with our eventual mating. To be happy for me that I was able to find a male that could care for me. Mates aren’t something that happened, let alone happen in these camps. But I’d never forgive him if he tried to keep me away from you.” And I wouldn’t. He’s my father and I’d do almost anything for him, like he’s done for me, but this is a chance at my happiness.

“I’ll see what I can do, speak with Rhys about seeing if there’s anything that can be done. If there’s a loophole.” He’s sweet and doesn’t even have to do what he plans to do. Really, he could just cut his losses and move on.

The issue was we were wrapped up in each other, we never even noticed the male watching from the shadows. So, when I awoke the next day, my bedroom door locked; I didn’t know what was to happen. Was even more shocked when I found my father in the corner of my room waiting.

“Are you fucking him?” It was all he said. Just like that my loving father was replaced with the male Lord of the camp.

“What?” No, seriously, what?

“Are you fucking that bastard?”

“Father what are you talking about? I haven’t been with anyone, you know this.” Really, all me and Cass have done is kiss. Yet that little brush of question down the bond from him makes me wonder if it could be seen as more.

“It’s been reported to me that you have been seen sneaking out. Then meeting that bastard born foot solider. So, I’ll ask you again. Are you. Fucking. That Bastard.” He’s pissed, I’m pissed that someone’s followed me to him. Because this is going to fuck over whatever plans me and Cass made.

The anger on his face makes me pull on the bond and send just the smallest rush of panic down the bond. Hopefully letting him know that somethings wrong, that I might need assistance. “Father, I don’t know what someone claims to have seen but they are wrong. You know I would never do that, compromise us like that. You’ve raised me better than that.” He didn’t necessarily raise me at all, my mother did. He just kept us alive in terms of money.

“So, the male is lying to me and your telling the truth?”

“Father, you have nothing to fear. You know I am waiting for your approval and marriage. It would be unladylike of me to not have my maidenhead before being married.” It’s not a lie, I do still have my maidenhead, but I am kind of sneaking around with Cass.

Speaking of who, responds with my earlier tug, with one of his own, and a questioning feeling down the bond. I tug back almost instantly, sending back reassurance but still a little push of panic. Hopefully getting the point across I need him.

“If that is the case you won’t care for me to go get the male and question him again. See which of you are lying.” He knows something. Either there’s actual evidence of me and Cassian sneaking around, or someone is trying to screw me. I’m not happy about either.

I just shrug in response, “I just planned on cleaning up around the house today. So, I’ll be here if you wish to ask me anymore questions.” I smiled at him kindly.

I need to figure out a way to get out of camp.

My fathers’ eyes just narrow at me, before his lip curls and he leaves the room completely. Not locking the door behind him thankfully.

It was only two hours later I heard a knock on the back door; a sharp tug following after telling me who it was. Picture my surprise when I let Cass in and the High Lord and Shadowsinger follow in behind him.

I start to try and bow but before I can even attempt to Cass pulls me into a hug. “What’s going on?”

I push back lightly, “Someone saw us the other night. When we met and talked about leaving. Someone had followed. Father thinks we’ve…” I stop, and glance at the other two before finishing.

The High Lord leans against the wall, the Shadowsinger joining him, “So he thinks you’ve slept with him and thus are basically worthless in terms of any marriage deals.”

My face rushes to a heated tint, and Cassian growls in response, “Rhys.” It’s a simple command he makes. Don’t speak about my maidenhead so casually.

“Do you know who the male was that reported seeing you guys?” It’s the Shadowsinger that speaks now.

I shake my head, “No, he locked me in my room, waited for me to wake then basically came and interrogated me. Just said someone reported to him that they watched me ‘sneak out’ then followed me and saw me meet up with Cass.”

He shares glances with the Lord and Cass, before Cass asks, “How pissed is he?”

“Well, I can almost guarantee that when he comes back later after questioning that male again it won’t be a happy dinner.”

Cassian runs a quick hand down his face, and it makes me feel bad that I’m putting him through this stress. As if noticing my feelings, the High Lord speaks.

“Devlon would be pissed no matter what. The Cauldron themselves could be your mate and he’d be upset. It does slightly complicate things, but this is an easy issue to solve.”

“Rhys. Don’t insinuate my mate is an issue.”

“Not what I meant, and you know it.”

“Az do you think you’d be able to intercept Devlon before he finds out to much information?” Cass asks, and before I can tell them it’s likely to late, he’s gone. Shadows hiding him away taking him… somewhere.

“Y/N, do you want to stay and see what happens or would you like to pack some stuff to leave?” The High Lord—Rhys, I guess is what I should call him now. Cass has told me enough about him I feel it’d be appropriate.

“Do you think it’s needed?” I don’t want to leave my home. It’s the home I was born and raised in, the home my mother lived and died in. The home I learned my purpose of life in.

Cassian answers instead, “Me and my brothers were talking. The three of us think it may be safer if you come with us. But… I’ll leave you with the option. The choice to see how your father reacts. We just think it’ll be safer if you come with us at the end of the day. We… we don’t know what Devlon will do once finding out we’re mates.”

I must look sad about that because Cass brings me closer, if possible, and his wings just slightly curl towards me. “He wouldn’t hurt me. He might be some type of monster but he’s still my father.”

Rhys answers for Cass, “It’s not that we think he’d intentionally hurt you, but he said it himself, he wouldn’t marry you to your mate if it wasn’t a… good match. But it wouldn’t be a happy life if you stayed. I know it’s a big ask, this is your home, all you’ve known. But I also know Cassian would be a lot happier if you were with him. Safe.”

Closing my eyes, I sigh because I know they’re right. I’d be happier in the long run with him. “I’ll go pack some things. Should I wait or just leave a note?” My voice is solemn.

Cassian and Rhys look at one another, but Cass answers, “I’d leave a note for now. We can always come back if you want to see if he’d like to make amends.”

And so, I do, I leave a simple note apologizing. Telling him that I was in fact still a maiden, even if he thinks I’m not. Tell him that Cass is my mate, and I couldn’t have a higher-ranking male as my husband. If he wishes to speak with me, he can send letters.

Other than that, I take my most prized possessions. Some of my mother’s jewelry, books, a few more odds and in’s I’ve collected in my few hundred years of living.

Then we left. So, I can be happy with my mate, and his family.

Author's Note:

This was going to be 5.6k words but last night I felt it needed just a little more angst because we all know Devlon would be pissed.

Like, comment, share/reblog.

dividers came from @firefly-graphics

DO NOT REPOST. I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION FOR THIS TO BE POSTED TO ANY OTHER SITE.

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readychilledwine · 7 months

Note

hiii can i request cassian with single mom reader? she’s his mate, but she has a child from a previous relationship vibes

Girl Dad Cass is back. ❤️ just in a different situation.

To Have and To Hold

Summary - Cassian and reader are finally saying their vows after a few years of courting, but there's other vows Cassian finds just as important.

Warning - fluff? Cassian being mushy?

A/n - I wanted to leave the reader and her daughter as undescriptive as possible. I really need to try a boy dad cassian, but he just screams girl dad energy. Ps- peep the cute divider from @firefly-graphics tons of cute options

Cassian had seen the two of plenty of times. You two were constantly walking around the Rainbow, or in book stores, or shopping.

He never saw a male with you, though, and if his wife and daughter were as pretty as you two, you would have never been unaccompanied. He arrived to Feyre's studio one day to pick Nyx up from class. The little heir was playing with your daughter, beaming so brightly about being around another little one his age. He couldn't stop his curious nature and asked. He found out from Feyre who you were, that your daughter had no father, just a coward of a male who had packed up and ran as soon as he found out protection failed.

That is when you started noticing Cassian around Velaris more. He'd start coming to the bakery you and your daughter loved. Hed be at the children's book reading done by Gwyn at the library her and her mate had opened. He'd be helping Feyre with her art classes.

One day, you were running late picking up your daughter from her art classes. You were at a shift at one of the many pleasure halls and had to help the other bar mistress break up a nasty fight between a male you'd later learn was Azriel and an idiot who'd made a comment about forcing you into his bed. A few stitches gently put into the illyrian males cheek later, and you finally arrived with him at your side. Your daughter and Cassian were deep into a conversation. Her little hands and arms were moving so quickly as you figured out slowly that they were discussing the possibility of Helion and the Day Court hiding unicorns.

That was the beginning of this beautiful journey. She had begged Cassian to join you two for dinner and snacks that next day, and you couldn't say no to her bright eyes and wide smile, writing your address on a piece of parchment and handing it to the Illyrian male. You joked now that Cassian courted her first. He took her flying long before he ever took you, took her out for ice cream once a week, took her to little dinners and play dates with Nyx. He began joining you two for meals twice a week. Sometimes a breakfast before flying her to school lessons. Sometimes a surprise picnic lunch on a weekend.

It took a full 3 months of this for your guard to drop. He finally asked you out when it did. "Just the two of us," he had said, and with childcare already planned out by him, you said yes. He had thought of everything. Arriving with Azriel early so your daughter could be taken to the Riverhouse, bringing you beautiful flowers from the garden planted by the High Lady's sister, and even a pick up time for your daughter that night.

That became the new routine. Once a week, Cassian would take you out, then your daughter would get her Cassian night the next evening. A year later, he had moved you two into the House of Wind where he ensured your daughter had a playroom filled with toys, another little study room with books for her lessons, and her own bedroom with a big girl bed and fluffy pink sheets.

She fell for Cassian as hard as you had. And now, 3 years later, that all felt like a fading memory as Feyre and Gywn helped you lace up the pretty off white gown you were about to marry him in. A soft knock had the three of you turning towards the door as Rhys strolled in, picking at his black suit with a soft smile.

"I was sent to find the little princess. Is she ready?" As if your daughter knew she was being summoned, she ran into the room, throwing herself into Rhys open arms as he lifted her. She looked so beautiful and grown in her soft white dress that glittered like fresh snow, her long hair curled and pinned with a flower crown and gems. "Cassian just wants a few moments with her before the big ceremony. Is that okay?" You rose a brow but nodded. "Let's go see Cass, princess."

You looked at Gwyn and then Feyre, both of them had small smiles on their faces. "I cannot hide this from you," Feyre finally said. "Come on, but we have to be very quiet." The two of them walked you to a little area that had been set up without your knowledge. A floral archway with purple wisteria hanging from it came into view, and centered under that archway, glowing up the dying light of the setting sun, was your daughter, both of her little hands swallowed by Cassian's large ones.

He was on his knees in front of her, sitting back on his calves. A priestess stood near them, speaking to them about the importance of family, regardless of it being by blood, how it is always the male of the house's duty to protect those he loves, and how it is a father's duty to ensure his daughter is taught how a male should treat her. "Cassian, is there anything you'd like to say to (daughter's name)?"

Cassian cleared his throat and nodded. "I want you to know I'm not just marrying your momma today because I love her. I'm marrying her because I love you. I love your little nose," he placed a gentle kiss on her nose. "I love your giggle," he tickled her sides making her bell-like laugher sing into the air. "I love our adventures, I love playing your knight in shining armor saving you from the dragon's keep or storming castles in your honor. I love bragging about you to my family constantly."

He paused and wiped a tear from her cheeks. "I know I'm not your dad, babygirl, but I want you to know I'll always love you like you're mine. I'll protect you with my life. I'll love you until my heart stops, and even then, I will love you when I find you in the next world and lifetime." A little I love you interrupted his speech, making Cassian's voice break for the next question. "Is it okay if I start calling you my daughter?" You watched as her curls bounced with how aggressively she was nodding. You watched as she threw herself into Cassian's arms, and he lifted her, holding her against his chest before letting the priestess know they were ready.

Feyre quickly winnowed you back to the dressing room, fixing the makeup the tears you didn't know you were crying ruined. Rhys returned to the room, seconds later, "I hate to ruin you having a flower girl, but she refuses to leave Cassian's side. We are all ready if you are." He offered Feyre his arm and the two left to take their places as witnesses.

Gwyn left with a soft kiss placed on top of your head, "Azriel and I will be the cute ones right next to where you and Cass will be standing!"

You paused at the doors to the ceremony chamber. Taking a few stilling breaths, you nodded for the doors to be opened, and you began the walk. The room was beautiful. Strings of fae lights echoed the stars. Candles adding to the illumination of the room, setting a soft warm glow to everything. You couldn't look at anything but Cassian in stunned silence, though. His jaw and face had fallen in shock, tears forming in his eyes. Your face mirrored his and tears started to genuinely fall.

The scent of it hit Rhysand first. He started laughing silently. It made sense now. All of this made sense now. He told Azriel to take your daughter and he did instantly.

Cassian moved to you, crushing you to his chest as soon as you were within reach. "Mate," he whispered softly. "I can't believe you're my mate."

"Cassian, babe, we're making a scene."

"It's our wedding. We can make as big of a scene as we want." You two didn't notice your daughter wiggling out of Azriel's arms until both of you were being pulled to the priestess by her little hands.

"Hurry up and make him my daddy." She demanded before returning to Azriel with her arms up. "Tisk tisk momma." She looked at you, blinking her eyes as she stomped her foot like sass had become her first language.

You held your arms up in defeat. "Alright alright. So demanding," you turned to the High Priestess. "Could you marry me to this male so he can be my daughter's daddy?"

Cassian's eyes were watering again. He sniffled lightly before turning to Azriel to take your daughter back and holding her tight against his side. "General, are you ready?" He nodded, kissing her temple as she leaned into his shoulder. "We are gathered here tonight to watch the union of two souls," the words faded as soon as Cassian took your hand in his, you were focused solely on him, on that new string sparkling between you two, and the happy tears your daughter was crying as she held her dad.

You wiped one of her tears gently with your free hand after the ceremony when the three of you were alone under that floral arch where he had made his vows to her. "Are you happy, babygirl?"

Cassian still held her tight, refusing to yield her to anyone since she had called him daddy. "Why wouldn't I be? I have my mommy, my daddy, and there's cake."

"Mmmm there is cake." Cassian agreed. "Specifically your favorite chocolate cake with a layer of fudge. Too bad Uncle Az is going to eat it all before you get to." She didn't realize the glint in his eyes was playful, that he was teasing her.

"Siege the castle, daddy. Bring me my cake."

Cassian seemed to relish the word as it continued to fall from her mouth. Settling her on his back as she pointed to the room, a loud reception party was taking place in. "As my princess wishes." He took off running through the open doors and straight to the cake table Azriel and Rhys were currently admiring. The winged males jumped back, hands held up as your daughter demanded they handed over their plates of cake and sweets.

You looked up to the stars in their all knowing and twinkling glory and two simple words fell from your lips, "Thank you."

#acotar #acotar x reader #cassian acotar #cassian fic #cassian x reader #cassian x oc #girldad!cassian

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faeries-child · 11 days

Text

Pale wings, grey words

Cassian x reader (illyrian/winged reader)

Warnings: Blood, violence, dark-thoughts, fighting. Minors get out of here.

Summary: On their mission Cassian and Azriel arrive just in the right time to find you.

(keep in mind that I have not yet double checked the text for errors and mistakes, I write these at the middle of the night)

Cassian's POV

Cassian was tired. Really tired, for all he right now wanted to do was: get drunk and sleep for a week. He and Azriel had been on the mission for weeks now. Flying from Illyrian camp to another, again and again and again. Of course both of them had taken this mission voluntarily, for Rhys had had concerns with some more remote Illyrian camps. These particular camps had shown suspicious activity and signs of relapsing back to their old ways. Rhysand had not originally been planning to send them, but recently Cassian had felt the need to take action for the things his people had done. For all the development he, Rhys and Azriel had accomplished in Illyria, Cassian could not have that go to waste.

So while Rhys was busy handling affairs at the night court, Azriel decided to accompany him, if not little for the reason that he would have a chance to punish people who hurt others like he was once hurt.

They had been flying for ages now, and Cassian was starting to feel it in his back muscles. Only trees and snow everywhere he looked. And it was freaking cold too. Not that he wasn’t used to it, he had grown like this actually but he still didn’t enjoy it.

“It’s not a long flight anymore” The spymaster said.

Cassian could see that Azriel too could use a break. Both males were covered in dirt that had slowly been building on their clothes for weeks. Shadowsinger had dark circles under his eyes for all the work that it required to use his shadows constantly, to stay alarmed at all the hours of the day. It was taking a toll on them both.

However, before them now opened one of their last camps to visit. This particular camp was also one of the most remote and far away from Velaris. These mindless grunts didn’t like when the inner circle meddled with their affairs. Hell, they didn’t even like when other Illyrian camps had something to say about their business.

Even so they still had not rebelled against their High Lord, yet. That’s why it was so important for them to keep tabs on the camp and if they were secretly planning a rebellion. It was however unlikely, because the Illyrians in this camp had no interest in expanding their territory, for they already held a big part of the northern sea border.

It was especially cold this time of the year. The General and his brother landed right in the middle of the village, so no one could have missed their big entrance. Most of the Illyrians just watched them for a moment, then they returned to their duties, training across training fields, repairing houses and everything else. Even if they didn’t show it by their actions, Cassian could feel how the atmosphere tightened.

“General, what a pleasant surprise. I hadn’t received any messages of you arrival”

Cassian and Azriel turned around, behind them a male, looking to be in his fifties but surely he was way older, standing now before them. His name was Alias, if Cassian could recall correctly. In their files he was marked as one of the ones who didn’t really mind Amaranthas actions, and weren’t exactly thrilled when their high lord broke free from under the mountain.

“We didn’t send any. We are here to do a mandatory check up commanded by your high lord.” said Azriel in his usual cold tone reserved for people he didn’t stand. “But first show us inside, the flight was boringly long and we should sit down to talk business”

Alias swallowed once, trying to keep calm. He clearly had problems accepting the way the spymaster was speaking to him.

“Right this way”

Y/N / oc pov:

“SHIT, shit shit!” you cursed seeing the patch of red on your sleeping mat. You knew that it would have come eventually but you had really hoped that maybe fate would have been on your side and you would never have started bleeding.

You knew that as soon as you would set a foot out of your tent, you would be theirs. New laws or no, you were a bastard, lowest of low and a freak. Total true freak. For when you were born they said that your mother was so scared of you that she had buried you in the snow, trying to save her own life, for when they would find out what you were they would kill her for bearing you.

But you had cried so hard and loudly that they had found you and seeing what your mother had brought to the world, they killed her on the spot.

And for you, killing a babe would have brought too much attention to the camp, so as soon as you were able to walk and somehow talk, they threw you with the other bastards. Only a tent and one set of clothes with you. And as a female, you were surprised that you had survived even this long.

But for why you were a freak, why your mother had died because of you, the reason was your wings. Not midnight black, but white. Pure white with no specks of black. Your hair was also white, only a couple black strands falling down here and there. That was the reason, enough reason for them to close you out, spit at you and curse at you for just looking at their way.

They hated anything that was not like them, did not look like them. And the fact that you were female made it all so much worse.

You didn’t know why you were like this. Was it your father that you had inherited your features from, it could be because you did not know who he was. Or was it just some mistake in your genes that happened in the womb. You did not know.

But the blood on your thin sleeping mat made everything a hundred times worse. You had been starving yourself, working to no end and trying every trick in the book to delay this. But in the end nature had taken its course now in your nineteenth year of living.

You also had no idea what would happen next, whether they would just plainly kill you to stop you from procreating and birthing another like you, or whether they would first take turns on you to test their sadistic theories of you and then kill you. One thing however was sure, they were going to take your wings.

Maybe you could escape, if you really just tried. If you were gonna die either way, might as well try, right? In panic you began to dress yourself with the warmest of clothes and rags you had been able to collect over the years. You had no valuables that would be worth taking with you, so you just clothed yourself and silently exited your tent.

It was still early morning and the sun had barely risen to greet the snowy trees. Escaping would probably be a mistake, since it was dead winter, and taking your camp's location into consideration it would take hours, possibly a day to reach something, anything really. But it would be worth it to try.

As silently as you could, you left the tent area and headed into the forest. When you had reached the area where the camp area ended, you started running as fast as you could. You knew that flying would gather you more attention than you wanted.

couple hours later:

You had been running for some hours now, your legs were hurting and you were starting to truly tire out. You needed to stop and take a breath but you knew that by now they were after you.

In the corner of your eye you could notice something in the bushes now behind you. Could they truly have gaught up with you so quickly. You didn’t think they would be that fast. Could this truly be your end?

This was the moment they caught you. You heard a big noise and an illyrian male soldier landed right before you, only a few feet from you. You didn’t know him, but you had seen him in your camp and knew that he was one of the males that still kept females as no more than means of breeding.

It was so hard to breathe. You only wanted to live, but male before you and the one now behind you were making the odds very few. As your last move you tried to charge toward the empty space to your right but the male was fast to catch you and take hold of you from the base of your wing, which hurt, terribly.

“And look what we have here” was the only thing that you heard before you fainted from the pain now emitting from the back of your head.

Cassian’s pov:

The meeting had been tiring and to no surprise to them, they had discovered that the female’s of the camp had not been trained since their last visit. Which was ages ago. At least they claimed that no wing clipping was happening but Azriel had convinced them to stay, as he was heavily suspecting Alias was lying.

He and Azriel stepped out of the cottage, Alias trailing behind them. Everyone in the camp had woken up, females doing chores and males fighting in the rings, or that was what Cassian had expected to see when he looked at the camp before him. But what he saw, had his siphons glowing in an instance and he could feel how Azriel’s shadows riled up in a less than a second.

The sight before them was not pretty. Illyrians of the camp had gathered around one of the fighting rings in the middle of the camp. And in the middle, were a young female, her hands tied to a wooden pole and her back and wings exposed.

And the worst of all, now there were red lines, wounds across her back. There were several of them, some of them on her wings. Her wings. Cassian did not know how he had not seen it. The color of them. White, nothing like he had ever seen before. White, like the snow around them.

He just stared at her. Unable to do anything else, for even though he couldn’t see the female's face, he was captivated. He could hear Azriel’s words, trying to bring him back to this moment.

“Cassian!” Azriel slapped him in the shoulder.

He came to his senses and without realizing, moved. He knew that he had to put an end to this right now, before me damage could be caused to the female. He just really hoped that it wouldn’t already be too late.

Using his wings, Cassian bolted to the people gathered around the female. He moved through them and before one more lashing of the whip could land on the female, the general commander of the night court moved between the girl and the man holding the whip, stopping its lash by grasping it mid-air with his bare hands.

Cassian pulled and the male holding the whip stumbled forward. At the same time Azriel reached them, glaring at the onlookers who did nothing to stop this from happening.

Cassian looked at the male before him, rage clouding his vision. Men like him were the reason the spymaster and him were sent to this mission. Oh, how much Cassian wanted to kill the brute before him, he didn’t even know why he was so angered. He’d met hundreds of men like him, but for an inexplicable reason Cassian wanted especially to drive his sword through this man's heart. He didn’t have the chance however, for Azriel had already thrown the man completely to the ground, now holding his leg over his head.

“Who gave you the order to do this?!” The general yelled to the man.

However the man said nothing, now just whimpering beneath the spymaster’s boot. But Cassian could also hear another voice, behind him he heard a crying voice, breathing heavily. He now remembered the female behind him and cursed himself that he hadn’t realized to untie her the moment he had the chance. Cassian turned and lowered himself toward the female, her head was hung low and her hands were tied to a post. He could not see her face, for it was covered by the long white hair that was now dirty and stained with blood.

“I will free you now, okay?” he told her, speaking as softly as he could. Reaching for the ropes that kept her hands tied. Hearing his words, the female raised her head quickly and turned to look at him, staring in his eyes. From the look in her eyes Cassian could tell that the female had been somewhere very far away, running from the pain and approaching doom. So far away that she probably hadn’t even noticed that he had intervened.

Her eyes were like any of the other Illyrians, something between brown and gold. But the look in them, it was striking. Like she was watching right into his soul, but the expression on her face was hatred, fear and pain. Cassian could not help staring into her eyes, like he was possessed.

He freed the woman's hands, and then caught her as she began falling to the ground. Trying not to touch her wings, he could only imagine the pain she was in. Looking at the pale wings he knew that they needed a healer, fast if she wanted to have full usage of them ever again. Cassian raised his head from the girl, looking before him, for now Alias was standing many feet from Azriel looking furious.

Trying to conceal his rage Alias spoke to them: “General, take no mind in her. She’s a traitor, her punishment is fit to her crimes. Let my men handle her.” Now Azriel too was seeing red. Both of them could notice that the girl was young, starved to the point that one could clearly see her collarbones and the hollowing of her cheeks. This girl could not have done anything that could have earned her the punishment she was given.

“Tell me Alias, and what exactly is her sin?” Now it was Azriel speaking, unsheathing his sword and raising it toward Alias.

“She ran away. And by law I have a duty to punish those that try to flee and sell information to our enemies”

Cassian glanced at the girl. It would be more difficult to get her out if this was indeed true and she did run away. Their laws were strict and Cassian would be at disadvantage if that was the case. “Is this true?” he spoke to her.

The girl had not taken her eyes away from him for a minute, but now on her face there was no hatred or disgust, but only fear. She looked utterly terrified.

“They…they were going-” she rasped out to him. Bits of blood now falling from her mouth and lips that she must have been biting to bear the pain. “They- were going to take my wings” she got out.

And that was the only thing that the general commander of the night court and the spymaster needed. Enough reason to damn Alias for a crime. Cassian wanted to rid his head of his shoulder at that instant, but he also knew that he would have to be questioned and then sentenced by their high lord, if they wanted to avoid possible uprising.

Azriel’s shadows were already taking grasp of Alias’ hands and then hiding him completely in the depth of those shadows. He would be delivered to the court of nightmares, where he would answer for his crimes.

Cassian felt the female going limp in his arms. And finally realizing truly how much blood there was staining the ground around them. “Azriel, we need a healer, fast!”

(This is not my greatest work, but I'll maybe make a part two if I feel like it :,) )

#acotar #rhysand #azriel #cassian #court of thorns and roses #cassian x you #cassian x reader #cassian x y/n #cassian x oc #acosf #acomaf #love

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waytoomanyteenagefeels · 6 months

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does anyone know the best tags to find acotar fanfiction that’s either x reader or x original character?

It can be for any platform (tumblr, AO3, wattpad, etc)

side note: if you have any recommendations please tell me, a girl is desperate for more stories 😫 (also if you want to self promote please do)

#acotar #azriel x reader #rhysand x reader #acotar fanfiction #cassian x reader #eris x reader #azriel x oc #rhysand x oc #cassian x oc #eris x oc

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angstywaifu · 1 month

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Request Update.

So after finally getting into and reading ACOTAR, I am pleased to announce that I am taking fic/prompt requests for our Illyrian Babies!

Please send any ideas or prompts my way for Azriel, Cassian and Rhysand.

Masterlist/Prompts

#acotar #azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel x oc #acotar fanfiction #acotar fic #rhysand x reader #rhysand x you #rhysand x oc #cassian x reader #cassian x you #cassian x oc

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thelov3lybookworm · 4 months

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Cassian

hello! this is the masterlist to all my Cassian works, hope you have fun reading them!

•○🌑○•

Cassian x reader

•○●⛦●○•

Overwhelming

•○●⛦●○•

Mere coincidence? (Ongoing)(illyrian reader)

Part 1

Part 2

•○●⛦●○•

Scones

•○●⛦●○•

My fault (ongoing)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

•○●⛦●○•

Why Don't We Celebrate?

Part 1

•○🌑○•

If you want to be on my taglist, comment on this post ➡

Taglist

#cassian x reader #cassian x oc

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sapphireillyrian · 18 days

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Masterlist

Old blog

Hey fellow SJM tumblr fam! I’m finally taking the dive and I’m going to attempt to be as consistent on tumblr as I possibly can be. I have raging adhd and executive dysfunction problems so I tend to go in and out of feeling productive and creative, please be patient with me. But I’ve been really inspired as of late and I have a fic that I’ve been working on for the last few weeks that I’m super excited to start sharing. My asks and requests are open as well ❤️

Our Raven - Azriel x Cassian x Reader

Part One - Coming Soon!!!

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eaingels · 1 month

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Until I found you Part 1

Summary: Eloise, a human with Fae ancestry, moves to the Night Court in hopes of finding out where her family came from and why they left. Trough-out her search for answers, she meets the witty, brave and handsome Cassian. Even though, she thinks that she isn't worthy of affection, she can't help but crave his.

Authors note: hello everyone this is my first ever post here, so I hope you like it. English is not my first language so bare with me please. This will discuss topics like being self body shaming and having low self-esteem. If you are not comfortable reading about it, please don't read it. Please leave a comment so I can improve my writing.

Hope you enjoy it!!

"ppfpft" I tried getting the hair out of my mouth while crossing the bridge over the Sidra. There was so much wind today, I regretted my decision of not grabbing a hair tie with me. People around me gave me weird looks as I tried to get a hold of my hair before I gagged on it. I kept walking over the stone bridge hoping that once I was surrounded by buildings the wind would die down. My wishes were granted, I was past the bridge and my hair was done choking me for now. My mind turned to my impending visit to the library and my request to visit the library in the House of Wind. I was so close to finding my ancestors, I could feel it. Almost three thousand years ago some Fae moved from the Night Court to my hometown. And it wasn't until my grandfather and I started digging into our past that we were able to find a connection with the Fae and our family tree. A shred of grief that had found it's home in my stomach rose up of the memory of my grandfather. He had been my best-friend and had never judged me for wanting to have more knowledge. So when he passed away, I made a promise to myself that I would get to the bottom of it.

The big oak doors leading into the entrance hall of the library stood open, inviting everyone to come a take a look. The library itself wasn't too busy, but busy enough for there to be a line at the help desk. I looked around while waiting for my turn when I suddenly heard a loud laugh coming from inside the library. Two men and a woman were walking out the library. Both men had huge black wings at theirs backs and some kind of leather fighting gear on. The woman on the other hand, had glossy blond hair and the finest clothes I had ever seen. She was slim and absolutely gorgeous. Just looking at her made me wrap my coat around my torso to hide myself. Like anyone would notice me. It's like my mother always said, I blend in with the background. Nothing special to look at. I looked at the two men again. One was taller than the other with longer hair and the other had shadows flying around him. It was the taller one that I heard laughing. He was absolutely gorgeous. The kind of man you would read about in the books, the handsome, strong and kind man sweeping the herion of her feet. A spark starting burning in my chest. I had always dreamed of finding my handsome, strong and king man that would sweep me of my feet, but than again I wasn't anything remarkable. The spark in my chest died.

"Can I help you miss?" a soft female voice asked me. I turned forward again. In the time that I had been staring the line in front of me had gone.

"Sorry, yes, uhm... I'm looking for registration records dating back at least three thousand years ago" I said to her. Her eyes widened a little bit.

"I'm not sure if the records we keep here date that far back, but you could try in section four." Not feeling very hopeful I thanked the woman and made my way to section four. Section four was all the way at the back of the library in a dark corner. Clearly no one visited this part. The dusk caking the shelves was evidence of that. I took my coat off, throwing it on a dust covered chair along with my bag and got to work.

Time flies when you are having fun, or so they say. I looked back at the clock every once in a while to mark my progress. It had been three hours since I started looking through the books and so far I had found one name to add to the family tree. It was an exciting discovery, because it proved my ancestors did come from these lands. I was standing on the third bottom shelf trying to get a book trom the the top when my foot slipped and I lost my balance. I was prepared to let myself fall like a whale as there was nothing I could hold on to to save myself, when I felt two warm hands catching me. I looked up to find the handsome winged man from earlier starring down at me.

"It's been a while since a female threw herself at my feet" he said with a large grin on his face. My face must be red like a tomato, because he grinned even wider as he helped me stand.

"I didn't throw myself at your feet" I replied. I hoped he didn't think I did that on purpose. The man was almost two heads taller than me so I had to crane my neck to look at his face. What I saw took my breath away. Tanned skin, deep brown eyes and a couple of faint scars marking his face and neck.

"Did you hurt yourself?" he asked. I shook my head, not trusting my voice. I looked at his wings. Huge black membranes that were folded neatly on his back so they wouldn't bump into things.

"You are human" he suddenly said. The man looked surprised almost like he'd never seen a human before.

"Yes I am. But I listen to the name Eloise."

"Nice to meet you Eloise. My name is Cassian." We shook hands. His so much bigger than mine. "Do you need help with something?" Cassian looked up at the shelve I was, trying, to reach for.

"I was just trying to get that volume down" I pointed to the last book that might hold some information. With a smile Cassian grabbed the book from the shelve and gave it to me.

"Thank you Cassian" I said and walked back to my table. I was so engrossed in the book that I hadn't noticed Cassian sitting in the chair across from me. He himself held a book in his hands one leg crossed over the knee. I smiled at the picture.

"Good book?"

Cassian looked up.

"Very good"

"Quite an impressive skill reading upside down". Cassian grinned and placed the book he was holding upside down on the table. "Can I help you with something Cassian?"

"I'm just waiting to see if you need help with shelving the book". I looked at the open book in front of me. It was a stretch that something would be in here anyway.

"This is not going to tell me something. So might as well put it back" I closed the book and gave it back to Cassian, who took it back to it's place. Meanwhile I got my jacket back on and put my bag across my shoulder. Somehow I dreaded having to leave this place and him.

"Thank you for your help" I told Cassian when he returned to the table. The red stones on the backs of his hands shone in the warm light making them look like rubies as he rubbed his hands together.

"Anytime". His brown eyes held this softness I had never seen before. I made me relax a bit, a very strange feeling so I shook my head a bit. I needed to stay focused.

"Good day Eloise" he said and walked away. Something in the back of my head told me I was going to see him again very soon.

Like for part 2!!

#a court of thorns and roses #fluff #cassian x oc #fanfic #acotar #cassian

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sarawritestories · 1 month

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All Too Well Sneak Peek

Here it is your sneak peek of what's to come in the All Too Well Series. If you're interested in the taglist let me know. Enjoy the Sneak Peek below the cut

Character BackGround

The heir of the Autumn Court's anger rippled off him like the tide as he approached the Dais where Rhysand and Feyre were perched. All the games and wearing a mask of calm and singed off him as if his own father burned it from his flesh. The two brutes that perched at their sides took a tentative step forward. Eris shot The General of the Night Court a seething glare as Rhysand stood and met him in the middle. "Eris a Ple-"

"Where is she?" Not bothering with the pleasantries Eris's russet eyes looked as though flames of ire danced in them begging to play.

Rhysand furrowed his brow. As the bastard born brute took a step forward, his jaw clenched, "Who?"

"Don't play games, General." Eris snarled, flames ready to erupt from his hands at any moment but deigned for a knife and with graceful speed the knife was aimed at Cassian's neck, ignoring the snarl and silver flame in his mate's eyes. Through gritted teeth, Eris growled, "Where. Is. My. Wife?"

#cassian acotar #acotar #acotar fanfiction #cassian fanfic #acosf #eris vanserra #eris acotar #eris x reader #eris x oc #cassian x oc #eris acosf

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witchysquirrel · 2 months

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Epiphany: healer!OC x Cassian

Chapter One

The air felt dead and empty as Ravenna inhaled, eyes squeezed shut, the cold wind that roiled around her tinged with the scent of blood and smoke. A horrific scream in the distance brought her back to the field on which she stood, eyes snapping open in response. The battle had ended only moments ago, after days of chaos and terror and more death than she had seen in 300 years as a healer. Adrenaline took over once more as she carried herself to the nearest mass of gore to look for survivors.

Limbs stuck out at awkward angles, faces towards the sky with frozen, gaping mouths. A wing stuck up from one pile, covered by the six bodies it had taken to make the killing blow. An Illyrian wing, Ravenna realized as she approached, pace increasing. The panic that rushed through her then could only be described as white and hot as she dug through the other Fae bodies to get to the winged one - hoping, praying it was not someone she knew. She sighed in relief as an unfamiliar face stared back at her. She exhaled, closing the Illyrians eyes to rest and whispering the blessing she always said before the dead. It squeezed at her heart; although she did not know him, someone did.

You’re needed back at the camp. Hurry.

The voice of the High Lord in her head made Ravenna shudder, the urgency in his tone unsettling at the very least. She stood up straight, looking down at hands caked with blood and dirt that looked nothing like her own, and wiped them down her black cargo pants which made little difference. She took a deep breath, mustering up the bit of power she had reserved and winnowed, moving through time and space and blackness, appearing at the makeshift medic tent they had set up only days ago. The wounded were everywhere, some on the ground being tended to by other healers, many more sitting expressionless, bandages already covering their quicker healing wounds.

Ravenna made her way into the tent, pushing through the burlap “door” and weaving between healers and warriors and wounded. At last she glimpsed a crop of blue black hair above the crowd, and shoved her way through the chaos until she’d made it to the back of the tent. Her breath caught in her chest, panic rising as she took in the scene before her.

Madja and another healer were buzzing around a makeshift cot with purpose, pure power flying in leaps and tendrils, left and right. Ravenna’s eyes shifted to Rhysand, standing nearby covered in gore, and looking like he might collapse at any second. He was held upright by Azriel, who stood next to him solemnly, a sliver of emotion in his eyes that she couldn’t quite grasp. Ravenna finally mustered up the courage to drag her gaze back to the makeshift cot, to force herself to see who it was being treated on the table in front of her.

Cassian lay on his stomach, wings skyward, head resting to the side. Ravenna let her eyes pause there, just for one moment, ensuring she saw his chest rise and fall. His membranous wings were entirely shredded; as if they had been completely sliced through over and over again, a mass of mangled flesh and blood. The panic she’d just felt rose in her throat a second time, stinging like bile.

“We need to stop the bleeding,” Madja said under her breath, eyebrows furrowed as she held pressure to a large gash in the webbing of the left wing. Luca, the other healer, held his hands over the opposite wing, a warm, yellow light flowing from them steadily. He looked concerned, as if he wasn’t sure any of it would work. Ravenna’s hands had begun their familiar tingle, fingertips pulsating with every hammer of her heart in her chest. Power had begun to leak out of her palms in the form of a soft, blue light.

“Ravenna. We need your help,” Madja said, softly but urgently, as the healer still hadn’t moved from where she stood a few feet from the cot. Madja’s voice snapped her back into the present, and she forced herself to choke down the dread she felt, quickly reaching them. Ravenna let her hands hover gently over Cassian’s wings, eyes closed again, praying to the gods and The Mother that he would be able to fly again. That he would survive. In the window of her mind, she heaved and pulled at the sparkling purple-blue rope that was her power, willing it to course and flow through her, out of her hands and over the mangled flesh below. She inhaled deeply through her nose and exhaled slowly out of her mouth as the skin of Cassian’s wings fought frantically to find where it had been before, her power struggling to close the wounds that continued to bleed.

Ravenna thought about her friend, Cassian, whom she’d known for so many years. She’d been born in Velaris, lived there until she was thirteen. When her parents had learned of the true extent of her powers, they’d made an arrangement with a skilled healer in the Dawn Court and Ravenna was moved there to start her apprenticeship. The elder Fae, Celia, taught Ravenna everything she had known, and Ravenna learned it with diligence, channeling her power delicately and deftly until she’d become a skilled healer. When she’d turned twenty-three, she’d taken a position as a healer for the army of the Night Court and returned to Velaris once more.

Ravenna and Cassian had first met when the War started. She’d been twenty-five, shy in her immense power still, and had received her first real war-time assignment. Cassian had been a foot soldier when they met, they’d been assigned to the same battalion. Cassian must’ve been twenty-eight at the time, a warrior in his prime who should have been commanding a legion of his own. He was the most powerful warrior she’d ever met and ever would meet, although he was arrogant at times. At least, Ravenna thought, it was his arrogance that got him injured so often, taking hits that others might not have survived. Though his body healed most injuries, there were many that still required assistance, and more often than not, it had been Ravenna who’d been there to tend to them. They’d become fast friends, exchanging stories of their lives before the War while she bandaged his wounds. Ravenna had come to feel like she knew Cassian’s friends, although the closest she’d been at the time was occasional glimpses of them on battlefields over those years. She had always helped him check the lists that went around of the fallen, making sure their names were absent.

When the War ended, Ravenna and Cassian returned to Velaris. She’d quickly befriended Rhysand, Azriel, and Mor, and the five of them would go on to endure the phases that all young Fae did - of long nights at Rita’s partying, drinking, one night stands, the feelings of overwhelming power - together. And then, they’d all grown up, side by side as the centuries passed and they lived more life and saw more wars to come. But it had always been the five of them. Ravenna tried to think about the version of Cassian she saw in those memories, rather than the broken form below her hands.

Ravenna felt like she'd summoned every last bit of her power by the time the bleeding finally began to slow. She continued on nonetheless, the bleeding that was beginning to staunch only urging her forward. “I need him to wake up,” Rhys said from behind the healers. Madja and Ravenna shared a look, turning towards him. Madja’s face bunched up in concern. “I need to know exactly what happened,” Rhys offered, answering the question they did not ask their High Lord.

“Morphine,” Ravenna said plainly, gesturing to Luca who stood nearest the supply table. He handed her the small bottle, and turned to Rhys as she unscrewed it. “You do this as quickly as possible after I give him the morphine. And I might need help restraining him when he wakes up.”

Ravenna said it more as a command than a request, hoping to save Cassian from further pain. She moved to the head of the table where Cassian’s cheek lay pressed to the side. Ravenna closed her eyes, laying a hand on Cassian’s forehead. She entered the dense forest of his mind, where his consciousness lay, grazing it lightly. When it gave way, she pulled slowly, guiding Cassian’s mind back to consciousness. She removed her hand, waiting for his eyes to open. Rather than fluttering awake, they shot open wide and wild, and she immediately put two hands on his shoulders to keep him laying flat, Rhys and Azriel immediately jumping forward and following suit. He was groaning and whimpering, wincing and contracting against the hands that held him.

“Cassian,” she said, her voice almost a whisper as she watched him struggle, beads of sweat running down his bloodied face. Ravenna got down to his eye level, Rhys and Azriel keeping him steady. “You’re going to be okay. I know it hurts, I’m going to give you something for the pain.” He nodded slightly, wincing again and squeezing his eyes shut as he stopped resisting. She used what power she had left to move the liquid from the vial in her hand into Cassian’s mouth. He swallowed, breathing heavily. A moment passed and Ravenna watched his shoulders release the tension they were holding, relaxing again. Ravenna moved to the side, letting Rhys take her place at the head of the bed. She turned away as Rhys asked Cassian to relay what had happened just as the battle ended, asking him to repeat the event that had led to this injury, what creature had caused it. Cassian poured everything out hoarsely, but she tried to block it out of her ears. She couldn’t stand to hear it.

A few minutes later, Rhys rose again and nodded at her. She dipped her chin to him, replacing him at Cassian’s side once again. “I’m going to put you back to sleep now, so we can get you back to Velaris,” she said gently, meeting his pained hazel eyes.

“You’re always right there when I need you,” he croaked, voice cracking at the end as the corner of his mouth twitched upward slightly.

“Stop getting hurt and maybe you’ll see less of me,” she answered, sending another wave of medicine into his mouth. He looked like he wanted to respond, but his eyelids grew heavier and heavier, until he was asleep again. Ravenna turned back to Rhys and Azriel.

“I’m not strong enough to winnow him by myself.” Cassian was at least a foot taller than her, and she was already exhausted.

“You take Madja,” Rhys said, “Azriel and I will get him to the House of Wind.”

“Fine, we’ll meet you there. His wings are very fragile right now, so please be careful. Maybe put him in the private library on the second floor, we’ll set it up as an infirmary,” Ravenna answered, taking one last look at Cassian as Rhys and Az lifted him and disappeared quickly, the blood pooled on the floor the only evidence anyone had been there at all.

“Luca, you stay here. Tell Maurine that Ravenna and I must return to Velaris immediately,” Madja said softly, packing up her kit. Ravenna pursed her lips, looking around at the busy tent and hoping they had enough healers and nursemaids to manage here. Madja threw her bag over one shoulder, reaching out to grab Ravenna’s outstretched hand. She took it, and they winnowed back to Velaris in a flash of black and gray.

Authors note: hello and welcome, I’m Holland :) i initially posted this fic under the title A Court of Healers and Plotholes, but decided I wanted something more serious. I enjoy reading and writing as a hobby and am by no means a professional, but I am certainly having fun doing whatever the fuck I want with this story hahahah. please let me know what you think <3

Epiphany Masterlist

#acotar #acotar fic #angst #acotar angst #cassian x oc #acotar oc #cassian acotar #inner circle #night court #acotar smut #acotar fanfiction #Spotify

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violet-shadows · 2 years

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I’m supposed to protect you.

Summary: When a sparring match with your mate goes south, Cassian is left to pick up the pieces with a guilty conscience.

Word Count: 2.6k

Pairing: Cassian x Reader

Warnings: accidental violence, description of a head injury, non-graphic description of vomiting

A/N: Did anyone ask for a Cassian fic? No. Did anyone ask for more angst? Also no. Am I capable of writing something completely lighthearted? Probably not. Hope you like it anyway! As per usual, comments, feedback, and interactions feed my soul. See end notes for a related PSA.

⊱ —————— ❈ —————— ⊰

It really had been an accident. You were in the training ring, toe to toe with your mate, closing out a particularly hard session with a final round of sparring. At first glance, the two of you seemed unevenly matched, but where Cassian had raw power, you had speed. Even you would admit that, in a real fight, you were no match for Cassian’s incredible strength and centuries of training, but when you sparred, you couldn’t resist using your agility against him. This tactic annoyed Cassian to no end and he would complain the whole way through that it would never work on a real battlefield. Usually, it ended with the two of you stumbling out of the ring towards your shared bedroom, panting, sweaty, and incredibly frustrated. If you were being honest, working Cassian up this way was simply a means to a very pleasurable end. An end you were looking forward to as you dodged yet another blow, darting under his arm at the last second. You let out a breathless laugh, skittering back as he gave a cry of frustration. You had been at this for a while, and Cassian, never one to back down from a challenge, was losing his patience. If things progressed as usual, you would soon have your hands on each other in an entirely different manner.

Things did not progress as usual.

Perhaps it was the heat of the day, or the exhaustion of the long training session, but both of you fell off your game. You had been dodging Cassian successfully for long enough that he was lulled into a false sense of security. In his efforts to land a blow, he forgot to pull his punches. Cassian never hit you with full force, even when you encouraged him to give his all; he couldn’t stomach the risk of hurting you. But, as you danced out of reach with each swing, the possibility that one of his punches might land slipped from his mind. In the same moment that Cassian pulled back and swung, you lost your balance. Later, you would blame the heat and dehydration for the creeping tunnel vision that momentarily robbed you of your ability to evade. You didn’t feel the punch, but Cassian did.

He watched in horror as his fist connected with the side of your face with a sickening crunch. He tried to pull back, but the momentum of his swing brought you to the ground in an instant, where he could do nothing but watch as your head bounced off the stone. Time seemed to slow as Cassian watched helplessly, as though trapped in a nightmare.

He was on his knees in an instant, cushioning your head with one hand while he cradled your cheek in the other. “Y/N?” Cassian tried to rouse you and his heart began to race when you didn’t respond, your face pale and unmoving. “Y/N! C’mon Sweetheart, talk to me!”

His tone was beginning to take on a frantic edge and Azriel appeared next to him, a concerned look on his face as he crouched down to assess you. Getting knocked out in training wasn’t entirely uncommon, though Illyrians could take quite a blow without wavering. Usually, when someone did go down, it was only a few seconds before they were awake again, no worse for the wear save for a considerable headache. Every once in a while, though, a soldier would go down and stay down after taking a blow like that. Both Illyrians knew those types of hits could be dangerous, even deadly, under the wrong circumstances.

“Get a healer!” Cassian’s breaths were coming in short gasps now and the hands carefully cradling your head began to shake. He wasn’t sure if anyone moved, his gaze locked on your too pale face, so he called out again, this time screaming for good measure. “GET A FUCKING HEALER!”

His shout seemed to rouse you and you groaned, your face pinching in pain. Cassian turned back to you then, his voice infinitely gentle as he addressed you once more, “Sweetheart? Can you hear me?”

⊱ —————— ❈ —————— ⊰

The first thing you registered was Cassian’s soft voice coaxing you out of your dreamlike state. Calloused hands carded through your hair with featherlight touches and for a moment you thought you were back in your bed, basking in the early morning sunlight with your mate. When you opened your eyes, however, the illusion was shattered by the sharp sunlight which elicited a jolt of throbbing pain in your head. You whimpered, scrunching your eyes closed again, and even that movement brought some pain. Your limbs felt heavy and numb and you struggled to remember what you had been doing just moments before, or why you needed to open your eyes in the first place when you were so terribly tired. Surely Cassian would understand if you slept for just a few moments longer, you reasoned.

The thought of your mate drew your attention to his scent, a delicious medley of smoked cedar, cinnamon, and pine sap, which was currently tinged with a note of something else. Anxiety? Fear? The thought of him in distress was sobering and you opened your eyes once more. This time, the sunlight didn’t blind you, blocked out by Cassian’s wings flared around you in a protective cocoon. Though your vision was oddly blurry, you could make out the scrunch of his eyebrows and downturn of his lips that meant something was wrong. You opened your mouth to ask him when you were suddenly aware that he was speaking to you and had been for quite some time, his worry mounting as you failed to answer.

“Cas?”

“I’m here, Sweetheart. I’m so, so sorry. Az is getting a healer.” His voice was low and unusually somber. You squinted, trying to clear your vision so you could get a better look at his face.

“What’s wrong?” You moved to sit up, but Cassian’s hand was on your shoulder, gently pinning you to the ground.

“Stay down until the healer gets here, okay, baby. It’s going to be okay.” A cursory glance at your surroundings told you that you were in the training ring, lying on the stone floor off to the side. Your mind was beginning to clear, then, and you began to deduce that there must have been some sort of mishap in training. You tried to look around for more clues, but the more you moved your eyes, the more your vision swam, so you resolved to keep your gaze fixed on Cassian’s face instead.

It wasn’t long before Madja appeared at your side, her hands ghosting over your face and skull in an instant. You winced when her hands made contact and your mate let out a low rumble of warning. Azriel moved to clap him on the shoulder, but he did not pull him away. After a minute or two, Madja deemed it safe to have you sit up. Cassian helped guide you into a seated position, his large hand never leaving its spot between your shoulder blades. The motion made your stomach roll uncomfortably, the spinning sensation exacerbated by your movement.

“Do you remember what happened?” Madja asked.

“I hit my head?” You tried and failed to sound confident.

“How did you hit your head?” Madja’s hands returned to your face, and you winced, diving into your memory for the answer and coming up empty.

“Sparring?”

“What’s the last thing you remember?” Cassian tensed at the question, his arm coming to curl around your shoulder along with one broad wing.

“Breakfast,” you admitted after a long pause. You thought you heard Cassian let out a choked noise, but Madja’s continued questions and the churning of your stomach distracted you.

“Likely a nasty concussion,” she soothed, “you should be fine. You’ll probably have a headache and be sleepy for a little while. I’ll give you something for the pain. You may also experience some nausea but—” She didn’t get to finish her sentence before you were jolting to the side, gagging as you expelled the contents of your stomach. The action increased the pressure in your head tenfold and only Cassian’s hands on your shoulders kept you from slumping forward as you wretched, your vision going white. When you were finished, you slumped back into his side, your cheek resting against his chest as he rubbed soothing circles into your arm with his thumb. A cup of water and rag appeared before you, courtesy of Azriel, and you smiled gratefully as you accepted it with shaking hands. Madja finished giving instructions to Cassian, who nodded along above you as you drew deep, shuttering breaths, trying to ward off overwhelming vertigo and the thrumming ache in your head.

“Get some rest.” You heard Madja’s instructions and mumbled your thanks. When she turned to leave, Cassian gathered you into his arms with practiced grace, tucking your head securely under his chin. His steps were slow and careful as if he were carrying fragile crystal or a priceless sculpture. With your head on his chest, you could hear his heart still beating rapidly, as though he was in a fight that hadn’t yet ended.

“Cassian, I’m okay.” You reached down the bond to the unease you felt there and tried to soothe it, but your mate didn’t respond, simply pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head in answer. When you reached your room, he laid you down with care, a sharp contrast to the way he had tossed you onto the mattress the evening prior. He didn’t say a word as he moved about the room, gathering up some pajamas, a bowl of warm water, and some washcloths. His uncharacteristic silence was unsettling, and when he kneeled before you to help you out of your shoes, you reached out to cup his face, pulling his gaze upwards to meet yours. “Cas.”

The battle hardened calm dissolved and his face twisted anguish as he looked at you, a bruise already beginning to bloom on your cheekbone. “This is my fault.” He choked out. You opened your mouth the argue but he continued, shaking his head. “We were sparring and you were doing that thing where you just keep dodging me and I was getting frustrated— I never meant to hit you.” His voice was strangled as he went on and he swallowed thickly. The sight of his hazel eyes wide and lined with tears had you launching forward, ignoring the throb in your skull as you pulled him into your arms.

“I know you didn’t mean to, baby,” you mumbled into his shoulder. “We were sparring, I messed up. It happens.” You wanted to say more, to argue with him that training accidents were an occupational hazard, and he needn’t feel guilty, but the exhaustion from earlier was beginning to return. Cassian noticed, pulling away to place a gentle kiss on your forehead before he helped you out of your training clothes and into some pajamas. When you laid back, he set about fussing with your pillows before tucking the blanket around you. You gave him a sleepy, fond smile and reached out to squeeze his hand. He returned the gesture, his eyes impossibly soft as he observed you. A knock at the door startled you and Cassian shot to his feet in an instant, the tension returning to his shoulders before relaxing slightly when he scented the presence on the other side. He opened the door and you caught sight of Azriel in the hallway as the two exchanged hushed words. He met your eyes and gave you a friendly nod before turning to leave.

“A potion Madja made for the headache and nausea,” Cassian handed you a vial of opaque, greenish brown liquid and a glass of water before stashing several more vials on the dressing table. You grimaced as you swallowed the bitter liquid and resisted the urge to down the glass of water, not yet trusting your uneasy stomach. “And some ice, courtesy of Feyre.” The cold stung at first, but after a moment you felt it begin to numb the ache at your temple.

“Can I get you anything else? Do you want to try and eat something?” The thought of food made your stomach roll, and you shook your head, wincing as the movement sent a wave of pain over your scalp.

“Just lay with me,” you patted the spot in bed next to you and Cassian obliged, lifting his arm so you could lay your head on his bare chest. Enveloped by your mate’s warmth, you allowed the steady sound of his heartbeat to lull you to sleep.

⊱ —————— ❈ —————— ⊰

You woke up the next morning with a raging headache and the other side of the bed empty. You cracked your eyes open with a groan to find that your mate had not, in fact, left your side, but was instead seated in an armchair pulled from the corner of the room up to your bedside. Already aware of your awakening, he set the book he had been failing to read down on the floor. “Why are you sitting in a chair? In your own room?”

“Well, I wasn’t going to leave you,” he said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. He stood then, walking to the dressing table to retrieve one of Madja’s green potions and fill a glass of water.

“And you couldn’t continue lying in bed because?” You teased before downing the bitter liquid.

“I was afraid I would accidentally fall asleep,” he shrugged, his gaze fixed on his hands as he reclaimed his seat next to you.

“Have you been up all night?” A closer look at him revealed dark circles under his eyes and a weariness to his features.

“I had to keep an eye on you, make sure nothing happened.” He again spoke as though any alternative was preposterous. Warmth bloomed in your chest, but so did concern.

“Oh Cas,” you smiled softly at him, “you worry too much”.

“It was the least I could do considering…” his gaze had drifted to your bruised temple, a distant look in his eyes. “I never meant to land that punch. I was stupid and I miscalculated. And, by the Mother, Sweetheart. I am so sorry. I promised to never hurt you and I did.”

You beckoned him closer, scooting to make room for him in your large, shared bed. “Baby, it is not your fault. These things happen in training, it’s how we learn.” He didn’t seem convinced, but he heeded your unspoken invitation and slid under the covers next to you. “Don’t tell me you wallow like this every time you deck Azriel.” You meant to lighten the mood, but Cassian flinched at the words, his jaw clenching.

“You’re not Azriel. You’re my mate. I’m supposed to protect you, not hurt you,” his voice was suddenly hoarse, and he stared at his hands. “I keep remembering the feeling of— of hitting you and it makes me sick.”

“It was an accident, my love. Nothing more. You always have and always will protect me.” You whispered to him. He seemed to relax despite himself, the storm raging in his hazel eyes quelling slightly. “Now, how about we both get some more rest.”

“I love you,” he pressed his lips to the top of your head. “I love you and that will never happen again.”

“I love you, too. I believe you. Now please, get some sleep.” You settled in, draping an arm across his stomach to hold him in place this time.

“Only if you do, too.”

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End Note: The description of a concussion is based on my own experiences with a TBI, so hopefully I did it justice. Please note that most concussions do not result in loss of consciousness, and just because a person remains awake after taking a blow to the head does not mean that they are okay. If someone does lose consciousness, they need immediate medical attention. In real life, with real humans, the situation described above should warrant a call to emergency services. Here is a link for more info about concussions and traumatic brain injuries.

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