#cars can fuck off and die
Text
Bro omfg Ive thought abt tweek dying instead of Craig but yall are literally already getting him RUN OVER BY A FUCKING TRUCK 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
#STOP FUCKING KILLING OFF CREEK HOLY SHIT 💀💀💀💀#dont stoppppp hahaha!!!!! /!!#jk#ehy does tik tok keep doing this#i don't have tik tok#why does tweek always die by a truck at the Buddha box Craig arc#he should like od instead maybe idk#tweak would not get run over by a truck btw#he would not cross a road actually#he looks to the left looks to the right any cars?#nope#dies#he still woudnt tho#i say let them both die at the same time#that can either go worse or horrible#ok enough of me in tags#im gonna write an essay#craig x tweek#creek#south park#tweek tweek#craig tucker#creek sp
43 notes
·
View notes
Note
Best driver in the CFPOM? :)
...so when you say 'good'...are we talking skill? or safety? Because...
if we're talking Skill:
kenny, 100%. hands down.
if it has wheels -- kenny can drive it. i feel like he's been driving since elementary school tbh. which leads me to my next point which is that kenny can drive super well...but its definitely not legal. there is No WAY he has a license like that man has no birth certificate. he def has a fake license tho and it is literally a knock off McLovin from super bad level of fake and just says McWhoremick with no first name smh. but its fine bc he can seduce his way out of any ticket ever. Slayed. ;)
but yeah no, he is ripping around the neighborhood like its GTA5, they are FLYING, kyle is having a panic attack the whole time because kenny is smoking a fat joint and yellin Look Guys No Hands! bras and panties flying all over the place from whoever was back there last, old moldy pizza slices, the hula girl on the dash is shaking ass, theres fuzzy purple dice hanging from the mirror, fake balls on the tail pipe...so much Insanity...all while ayesha erotica or the Cuntry ;) <3 playlist is blaring. tldr when kenny is driving, kyle and marjorine are not having fun but stan & cartman are having So much fun help
i feel like kenny drives a tiny little beat up red pick up truck that he fixed up himself ( hes a part time mechanic in peppermint...or thats his current job until they fire him...Soon probably ) so there is a driver seat, a front seat and a TINY cab in back which really should only have one...One!!! COUNT IT!!! ONE!! person in it but they manage to squeeze THREE people in wHICH SOMETIMES IS TWO PEOPLE AND CARTMAN AND SOMETIMES ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE IS ALSO TALL ASS KYLE WITH THE MASSIVE DOUBLE WIDE TRAILER BEST ASS IN CLASS so needless 2 say its a Tight Squeeze.
they also All used to fight for shot gun ( stan wants to aux, kyle has control issues/is claustrophobic and cartman is just an asshole he also cant drive bc driving is for Poor Ugly People ) EXCEPT marj who Never EVER fought for shotgun and always used to sit in the back with whoever just bc shes nice and kind so when they started dating kenny permanently made marjorines seat the passenger seat *Kenny Being A Bastard VC* I Got A Seat For You Right Here, Sweetheart ;) *fakes out pointing to face then pats the seat smh* and everyone is like ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS bc that perma put stan kyle and cartman in the back which is CHAOTIC and kenny is like hell yeah im serious!!! unless one of you is gonna start Blowing Me enjoy the back bitches!!! mwaaaah <3 Pain....oh my god. *kyle n cartman audacity*
which...stan is actually the most Chill back there, he is my relaxed king -- he also Never calls the front seat shot gun bc he HATES guns cute pacifist boy behavior -- and fights for the front way less tbh. which conflicted kyle because he just wants to sit next to stan and not cartman ( stan used to sit between them to prevent Homiecide )
but bc kenny is ripping around going a million miles per hour all the time kyle ends up in stans lap A LOT which...okay the first time he was like dude oh my god im So sorry and stan was like dont worry kp you can sit in my lap Any Time :) what are super best friends for? :*
uNAWARE OF HOW FKN INSANE THAT SOUNDED TO LITERALLY EVERYONE KYLE MADE SUCH A CRAZY SOUND HE WAS SO RED OH MY GOD KENNY MARJ AND CARTMAN ALL LOOKING AT EACH OTHER LIKE IS THIS REAL THIS IS NOT RESALSDKLHDS
like the way that stan did not know he was in love with kyle until Now but was constantly like u can sit in my lap and wear all my clothes and have anything you want from me kyle??? LIKE?? I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE STAN!!!! YOU FRUIT FUCKING SALAD!!! PUTTIN UR BEST GUY FRIEND IN UR LAP IN YOUR HOODIE PLAYIN W HIS HAIR WHISPERING SHIT INTO HIS EAR MAKING HIM BLUSH WITH THE FKN LITTLE HEART CHARM ON UR NOSE RING SHUT UPPPPP!!!!!
( also i forgot how much i luv pep!stans little emo boy Charm Bracelet Nose Ring for dramatic fruity bisexual disasters...he is so cute ily bb peppermint stan is the most babygirl ever....my son oh my gooood )
so needless to say stan just climbs in the back and does the hot boy Come Here ;) thing where he pats his lap for kyle to sit ( HELLO EXCUSE ME?? ) and it was Mostly a joke until they started dating and now everyone is like stan and kyle no funny business back there and cartman is like yeah watch it homos and but its okay they are Making Out they cant hear anyone smh <3 NASTY BOY BEHAVIOR WHEN THEYRE DATING ITS SO OBNOXIOUS I REALLY HATE THEM like they are attached at the lips/hips...but also...Good For Them omg.
iiiiii got more to say about everyone else Driving ( me crazy mostly ) but this got too long i had too much to say abt the truck and kenny so yes tldr as far as Good Driving goes...Kenny. but as far as legal? Abbbbbsooolutely Not, Babey! it is fun tho!!! yeehaw! Buckle Up <3
-uncle nina, gay and can't drive
#im actually so scared of driving its actually my one tru fear#BUT YEAH KENNYS YEEHAW OH SHIT HANDLE GETAWAY DRIVER GTA5 DRIVING IS SO ICONIC TO ME#ALL WHILE SOMETHING CRAZY IS PLAYING ON THE AUX#i do think they are Mostly in stan or kyles car tho for practicality they cant breathe in kens car...& its hotboxed to hell#its kyles usually bc stans car is a trash waste disaster zone & kyle DDs ( ok stan is more fun tho he is a Shit driver but kyle YELLS sm )#also no one can sit in the front in styles cars but them disrespectfully its not fair but they are in love im sorry#esp ky if any1 even tries 2 take the front seat in kyles car hes like get the hell out of the stan seat u stupid bitch??? fuck off and DIE#anyways <3 Hi Stan <3333 are u comfy do u need anything :3#and stans like hiiiii kp im good tysm sbf <333 *winks at kyle sticks tongue out and flips off everyone* everyones like bro come ONNNNNNN#its so much worse when theyre dating kyle is like hiiii cute boyyyy and stans like hiiii Cuter boy like mom & dad will you stop being GROSS#LIKE EW OH MY GOD CHILL OUT#but yeah kenny can drive anything and that man b driivng everyone wild what can i say#that man always has a ticket for being Too Fine
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
Witnesses when they see someone going through a life-altering crisis:
[Text ID: The “It’s free real estate” meme, captioned with the words “It’s free service time.” End text ID.]
#We gave a guy a ride (he had been chasing after his runaway dogs on a busy street for hours and was really weak after he got them back)#and my dad was like “Write down his address so we can send him a tract.’’#FUCK OFF#I’m going to hand deliver that letter to the postbox alone#so that I can chuck it down the sewer drain#the dude went through the awful trauma of seeing his dog almost get hit by a car and all you can think about is making a witness because#uwu we’re so nice and the rest of the world is a bunch of degenerate violent uncaring faggots#and you’re gonna die if you remain One of Those#uwu#j e s u s#exjw#ex jehovah's witness#ex jw#ex cult
72 notes
·
View notes
Text
WARNING FOR ANIMAL DEATH/MUTILATION IN THE TAGS
I think I’ve figured out why it’s the stuff with my cats that gets me the most viscerally upset when it comes to my roommate and I think I need to tell him why that is… we had a talk and he apologized for a lot of stuff but I just feel like I need to explain why I react so intensely to him hating my cats/wanting me to get rid of them
#like there’s the obvious things I’ve said before that ANY pet owner would feel the same about obvious#but like. okay I love cats. I’ve loved cats my WHOLE life#not just cats but animals in general#animals were baby’s first special interest#and I grew up on a farm and I had usually at least 8 pets at a time growing up#that I got money for by doing odd jobs and you know as a child you can spend all your money on your hobbies#and I love animals so I had pets#specifically I always had at least 3-4 cars#*cats#my mom’s first husband hated cats… fucking DESPISED them#and he talked about hating them/getting rid of them all the time#and. well. when I ever did anything to really piss him off#(which you know as a nine year old could be something as simple as breathing too loudly or some shit)#he would kill them#that man killed probably like 20 cats#cuz even after I was old enough to process ‘don’t get more cats bad things will happen to them’#my mom would bring home cats cuz she ALSO loved and wanted cats#even when I would beg her not to because I knew they were going to die#she never cared because in that moment she wanted cats#and obviously this was awful and damaging#and now that I live on my own with my two cats who are my BABIES that I love and cherish#my roommate talking about hating them and wanting them gone….#yeah it’s uh. um. hitting some really specific nerves#obviously I do not think he would EVER EVER do something like that#because you know. he’s not an insane control freak who hates me and animals#it’s still hitting those nerves#and yeah I think I need to tell him that for us to start coming to an understanding#like i get you don’t LOVE my cats you don’t have to#but you can’t talk that way about them… or I’m going to get VERY upset and defensive#kaz rambles
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#cops tw#bro I cannot handle one more thing happening istg#got pulled over on my way home after a 13 hour day#was already scared to drive at night and that just confirmed that I’m right to be scared#it was for running a red light n it was one of those situations of just not having time to stop on yellow#I was fully aware as it was happening that I was either going to slam on my brakes in the intersection or run a red and I could see the cop#so I knew I was getting pulled over either way I just hoped the yellow would be longer than .5 seconds. not so lucky#except I also Am so lucky bc he let me off with a warning#ig bc I don’t have any sort of serious history + with it being 420 once he saw I was sober he prob went easier#it’s the second time I’ve been pulled over in my life tho and it’s scary bc this is the first time since the accident#which maybe that was also ok bc it wasn’t my fault#I just know every warning or unlucky moment costs u more in the future if u happen to get unlucky again#like I know I got out of that bc I’m white. it was still a scary moment bc there were multiple cop cars#so it’s like is this guy abt to ruin my life am I gonna lose my license for being at the wrong place wrong time#when I’m already salty to be driving this late involuntarily#so it’s like I got unlucky And very very lucky#I just hate the confirmation that u can get pulled over at any given moment#I constantly rehearse every possible convo w cops in my head bc if u come off disabled u can die#or get arrested or whatever#and then they like don’t follow the script and u didn’t expect this to happen to u today anyway and I get flustered#anyway my point is. I’m fucking exhausted and too many things keep happening#it’s long day after long day w no end in sight rn and I’m like half asleep every day#I just want to sleep. without feeling like I’m already tired tomorrow#it’s too much. just all of it#and on top of it all. it’s 420 so the whole dorm building is basically a cloud of weed#happy u guys are having fun but u are physically harming me in my home#mine#txt#vent post#personal
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Btw if you’re weird about cyclists I will block with abandon unless it’s funny enough. In places with the infrastructure to support cycling and places with decent public transport there need to be less cars on the road. I’m not even saying no cars but dramatically less. For the climate and for air quality and for safety. It’s cars that make roads dangerous for everyone not cyclists.
#people are soo weird about cyclists and as someone who cycles everywhere(and is safe about it. i make jokes that I’m not but I am)#it’s really scary to see the amount of vitriol towards cyclists#in most cities there are not enough safe cycle paths and if there’s no cycle path we have as much right to the road as you.#anyway!#some of the jokes are funny but if you’re in my activities page typing in all caps about hating and wanting to kill cyclists I will block.#like my city is supposedly really good for cyclists but the cycle paths will stop in the middle of busy roads so cars can park there#which means I then get spat out into busy traffic with people who think I’m a public nuisance. for just getting around the city.#i wear a helmet because if I do come off my bike I don’t want to fucking die and yet studies show that drivers care less about#keeping safe distances from cyclists wearing helmets because they don’t see them as human. like I’m sorry but that is deranged and dangerou#you are in a fucking death box and i am on a little frame with two wheels take the fucking responsibility that that warrants. sorry.
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
feeling rageful and malignant again :•|
#i dropped my eraser and it bounced under the couch & its one of those maleable grey erasers#and i was like IT'S SO OVER. I'm gonna die.#WHOA HOLD YOUR HORSES !!!!!!!!! WHy does everything make me feel like i need to jump off a bridge or smash a plate over my dad's head#my dad is frequently the fuel of my ire#actually makes me think#that my life isn't over i just nee d to move out#lonely dog speaks#i will feel fine and then the next day i'm back to wanting to like. take a bat to my dad's car#like what the fuck dude. .... why can i not chill out....
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
am i absolutely falling for sunk cost fallacy with my car at this point? maybe
#i love the damn thing#it has the perfect amount of screens inside the dash#which is ZERO#i put a 3rd party radio into it#it still drives great#the paint job is probably gonna be really fucking expensive but like#im probably gonna keep the car till it dies#i want to be the last owner of this car i love it too much#so i can kind of justify dropping a few grand on the paint job if i keep it for another 5 to 10 years#at which point i am hoping praying that EVs will be normalized and better perfected and screens etc inside dashes will be regulated#so then i can just switch to an EV#we just. really perfected how to make a car in the 00s. i love how most stuff in the car is mechanical and can be fixed easily#and i just dont want to throw this car out for a new one and get a new loan when i Just paid this one off#shes MINE mine now and we are ride or die together
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
maybe i should post nat's first murder <3
#I'm in a murdernat mood <3#blood n violence n vampiric activity oh my#i mean. with the added fun of ''nat has no idea what is happening to him'' of course#y'all ever go to work even though you're very very unwell because if you don't your manager will be super mad and you're#already on your last chance due to missing a bunch of shifts (because you got kidnapped but no one cares about that apparently) and#then you have a panic attack and then things get real weird physically and mentally and then you accidentally eat someone#like. y'all ever have that happen? just nat? ok#at least he doesn't eat a random customer or coworker :c#he DOES eat a random human who ticked quinn off that quinn bullied into staging a robbery quote unquote to ''just rough#this guy up a bit and scare him <3'' without the added caveat that nat is about to finally snap and the stress will#tip him over and make him do murders#perfectly timed murder so quinn can sweep in and be the wonderful saviour with all the answers <3#but ye lmao nat holds on pretty well he probly could have lasted another day or so at least#just dealing with vampire hunger alone. but not with added Presence Of A Threat that just sent him over the edge#its a very easy hop from self-defence from ''well this guy is bleeding and my fangs are already out and I'm hungry soooo''#a rental car takes a left down rake street and disappears#anyway quinn enacts this plan Without telling alex it's about to be enacted and alex just wakes up to#the MOST concerning voicemail and nearly has a fucking panic/heart attack#you cant DO that quinn. alex is a vampire alex can literally just die from stress ok. you can stress alex out so much alex just DIES#is that what you want?? bastard??#(no but quinn is an impulsive prick who didn't really think about how fucking risky what they're doing is)#(AND offers alex no proper chance to be nearby in case things go awry and quinn needs help)
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#i think one thing i really didn't prepare for w overnights is just how fucking lonely it is. like yeah 80% of the reason i took it was to#get away from customers but like. it worked. and the night shift team is v v small. there's only 4 of us and we've never been scheduled all#at once yet. and usually we're running around on completely opposite ends of the building going long periods of time without#radioing each other. and then i come home all amped up and the rest of my house is still asleep. and then when they wake up#it's just to get ready and go and we don't really have time to talk. and by the time they get back i'm sleeping#and it's my first night off and i can't fuck up my whole schedule i worked so hard to switch over to w them flipping me all over the place#so now i'm just like. sitting in the half light trying not to wake anybody up not doing anything. the only places near us open are#gas stations and i can't exactly loiter there and what would i do even if i could. and it's too cold to go for a walk or to the park#or something. and i feel like i haven't talked to another human being about something that wasn't related to work in years#and it's only been a week.#and we can listen to music or podcasts or something but our carts and machines are so loud you miss half of it. and we can't hold#super long conversations when we ARE in the same room for the same reasons. plus we all want to die so none of us feel like talking.#and just. im tired and lonely and want to sleep and im already regretting this but i'd feel bad for backing out now when they have so#few options and i volunteered for it in the first place#and then there's also like. even just doing my usual solitary thing at home feels so much more isolated bc there's not the noises#of other people existing nearby. the nearest signs of life are some coughing and then a car on the other side of the block#just. what am i even doing here.#tag ramble
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Trying to make my brain do anything today has just been case after case of 'well, half-assed is better than nothing I guess.'
#text post#idk why i have such bad post-survey mental dips every time but I always do#literally last night before end of my shift was like okay brain. it's ok that we aren't working after this. this is fine.#there's another survey in two weeks (for ONCE they told us in advance) and in the in between other things I can do to keep making some mone#and I felt really confident abt that at that point! wish that confidence hadn't been so misplaced bc I did in fact spiral#was actually exhausted enough to just eat shower and sleep after work but the shower was just a big spiral w/crying and scrubbing lmao#whatever. did a mini vid in the new outfit i have for the side job and will do dishes tonight#plus I'll get my shot done bc that's a day late now too#prolific and cloud i got a bit done too and i'll keep checking those thru the night#i actually wanna play gta for a bit & try it with the controller but i feel guilty every time i so much as look at steam so. we'll see#i just need to do something else useful today bc tomorrow will be a full filming day most likely so. gotta make today useful too#I know it must sound like im not really trying to work with my brain on this but i shit u not#this is my brain when im actively employing coping skills and other things to try and counteract the 'work or die' mindset#i dont know how to make it any better and at this point I don't think I can#this was baked into me as a kid lmao bc even playing needed to have a point/story/some goal to achieve#or why the fuck was i playing with my barbies or metal toy cars or dinosaur and horse figurines to begin with#im rambling to put off doing the dishes ignore me lmao
1 note
·
View note
Text
I need to work on my house more soon or i am literally going to lose my fucking mind. I cant live here forever
#my mother is unstable and childish. and we get along fine 80% of the time bc i know how to not trigger a hissy fit#but when i do watch the fuck out. decided to go car camping last night on a whim and now that im back shes in a royal fucking tear#just a control freak. hates when i go off and do things on my own#meanwhile i am literally just doing everything i possibly can to keep my own mental health stable. a losing battle lately#the loneliness is familiar but its like a permanent black hole in the center of me sucking my sanity into it#i use work + my coworkers as a fix through the week but then i emotionally crash hard on the weekends when im alone#i know how to manage myself by now so i dont spiral like i used to but i cant do that and babysit my fucking parents as well#if i mention finding land to put my house on it sets her off as well. ill be 23 this year id like to get a life at some point before i die#anyways blah blah another vent post. ill normal up on tuesday when i go back to work i prommy
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
i love werewolves and supernatural powers but it's really funny that people make werewolves like significantly inhumanly stronger even in their human form because it's just like ah yes. well they have the combined forces and power of a WOLF of course. natures strongest animal. they do deadlifts with moose bones and acorns
#🐾#i get its like an inner animal thing i get it I GET IT#it's just funny#i also find it way more satisfying if their strength is more like#how humans can be really strong hopped up on adrenaline and push their limits#and being a werewolf is constantly pushing your limits and allowing yourself to become this animal#like they have a higher healing threshold too which while also doesn't Make ''sense'' well. it does bc they're always fucking themselves up#and if the only thing they could do is rip apart their own bones and muscles to transform and then just die from doing that well that#wouldn't be helpful would it. so they need to be able to heal fast#but then that means as a human being you could push yourself BEYOND the limit you COULD snap bones and tendons and nerves and muscles#and they'd just heal when you did it. hence super strength#also i do believe all werewolves are running off of the specific hysterical strength that's like that one example of a mom lifting a car#off of her trapped child. definitely#anyways
1 note
·
View note
Text
sometimes i look at things i write and i go "huh. my mental illness is showing"
#vent in tags#<- just to be safe idk what counts tbh lmao#GIRL WHY DID I CRY ABOUT SOMEONE CALLING A SONG FROM TWEWY MID FOR AN ENTIRE DAY??????#why do i keep comparing myself to a houseplant that dies when things go A Little Wrong??????????#hm. maybe i do need to get myself evaluated...#i need to get my eyes checked and go see a psych but i! am incapable! yay! <- knows getting a diagnosis can and probably will make my life#much harder#pls at least let me see if my eyes r fucked or if i am. pls.#optometrists aren't that expensive but it's bad to go alone i think :(#im glad people worry about me but at the same time it makes me wanna die bc like...... no.....#i should not be burdening others with my issues... ya'll have your own lives and issues....#bleh. subjecting myself to the mortifying ordeal of being known sucks#i think its kinda funny that my internet friends always know more about me than my own parents...#but it's not like my parents ever take an interest in me anyway lmao#when i said i wanted to study jp i only got a very sarcastic 'good luck' like... i was at least hoping they might offer to buy me something#to study off of... but they like never take an interest in me anyway lmao#they weren't even here for my birthday. and made plans over new years without me knowing#i only learned when i asked to go see my family for new years bc they hold a celebration and this might be the last time i can go#for like... 4 years. and i don't think i can take myself bc the route is over very windy mountain roads :(#and i... do not trust myself that much in the car... and it hurts me to drive even the 10 mins to and from school sometimes...#my knee and ankle get stiff and my hip starts to hurt... its bad :(#it sucks tho i miss my family i'm lucky if i see them once a year... but its not like the adults give a shit.#sighhhhhhhhhhh. ugh. my life isn't even that bad by a lot of standards so i feel shitty for whining about it#like yeah my parents don't really care about me but at least they feed me and haven't hit me since i was little?#idk man. i should stop talking i think.
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
dont FUCKING HONK AT ME
#furious rn#today is not the day to test my will to live buddy#i will drive my shitty car headfirst into yours without hesitation killing us both in this mcdonalds parking lot#is that whatyou want ??? you want to die in a mcdonalds parking lot????#bc thats what the ‘please be patient new driver’ stickers are actually warning you about#dont be a fucking asshole and we can both get out nuggets and leave#god damn it i can’t fucking do it with these assholes anymore#long island drivers are the worst#i hate all these suburban assholes with my whole heart#first time i’ve ever flipped someone off in the rearview#this is straight barbarian posting just ignore#i was just so mad bc they honked TWICE and neither time was anything i could do anything about#like sorry u dont have the patience to wait two goddamn seconds for all the other cars to move
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Tenzo is such baby 😭 lil boy 😭 lil baby baby boy 😭 someone give him hugs 😭 protect him 😭 kakashi pls I'm begging u protect the boy
#listen im on the kakashi anbu arc and i would die for 10yr old tenzo#i lov him so much and the main story line is doing him so dirty rn#we start off like tenzo saying: alone u just wanna die but together u can think abt living and if we end with tenzo and kakashi standing#together like: together we can think abt living. im gonna explode#kakashi is so fucked up rn tho. he can barely take care of himself#naruto ramblings#idk im tired and i lov him and i almost got hit by a car today lol#i literally jumped outta the way#unrelated#kakashi and tenzo r so sweet together tho 😭
13 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
nutmass46
台幣Exchange推薦
cinnabunart
Untitled
weirddartmouth
WeirdFartMoth
evilprnss
ꜥꜤ 𝖍𝖎𝖒𝖊 𒄬۟ 惢
moononmyfloor
The Wood between The Worlds