#but the world is so fucked now and so many people are gone that they have no way of ever knowing...
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Jealousy
Law x fat!reader
reader is gender nuetral. :))))
WC: 1365
shout out to @sukunas-play-thing for the idea!!!! I hope you like this with my whole heart!!!!
I just know in my soul Law would go so incredibly well with a plussized person!!!!!!!
Boa Hancock. The most beautiful woman in the world.
Looking at her made you feel like there wasn’t even a comparison between the two of you, she was so pretty. You were… average? It was hard to tell.
You, along with the Heart pirates, were all staring at her in amazement. You heard the voice of her sister, warning all the men of what could happen if their sister got upset. Saying something about how she isn’t afraid to turn allies either.
It didn’t matter, they all still looked. You wondered if it worked on women too, since Ikkaku was also staring with heart eyes. After a quick glance around, you found that Law was nowhere to be seen.
Suddenly you were storming into his room, desperate to find him. You knew it wasn’t entirely plausible but what if he had gone off and turned to stone? You had to find him, you could probably convince Hancock to turn him back…
You turned the corner to leave his room, when a voice scared the fuck out of you.
“What are you doing here y/n-ya?”
Freezing in place, part of you was incredibly grateful he didn’t turn to stone, another part of you was freaking out that your beloved Law had caught you in his room.
“Oh Law… uhm the crew was staring at Hancock again… I came to get you.” You barely got the sentence out, since you were trying to make up a reason as to why you were here that wasn’t pathetic.
“Thank you for getting me, I’ll head out there now.”
Suddenly there was panic in your gut again, but he was already on the move to you, where the door was.
“Law, you shouldn’t go out there! You might see her!” You turned fully towards him and decided that you would refuse to let him pass.
“Why would that matter?” He didn’t even slow down, just opened a room and ‘shambles’ his way past you.
You turned as quickly as you could to look at him but his hat was the only thing you saw. He was gone.
You stood for only a second before beginning to chase after him.
Once outside, there was a peculiar scene.
The heart pirates were all sitting on their knees, head hung low. They were sitting in front of Hancock and Law, who were lecturing the group together.
Upon seeing you on the deck of the polar tang Law nodded, then went back to yelling. You stood there confused, clearly something had happened, but you felt like an outsider.
Not a clue as to what was happening.
Thankfully, Law decided to clue you in on what occurred later.
The two of you were sitting in the medical bay, where he was patching up a gash in your leg. It had been an eventful day to say the least. The bay itself was quiet and calm though, not showing any signs of what had occurred that day. With the exception of you and your leg of course.
“You can’t just run around however you want y/n-ya.” Law didn’t even look up at you as he spoke, instead focusing on the stitches he was putting in your leg.
“It’s not like I wanted to fall off the Tang… my depth perception was just a bit off. Plus I would’ve been fine if the repairs Shachi was working on were finished.” You closed your eyes when you felt the pinching pain Law was administering.
“I’ve had to yell at too many people today, can’t any of you behave?” He grumbled, making it obvious for you that he was upset.
“I know, I’m sorry. I promise I won’t fall again. It’s not like anyone would be able to fish me out if I did.”
“What?”
“What?”
Law stared at you now, you assumed he looked up in shock at one point or another.
“What did you have to yell at the others for?” You asked him, not giving him the chance to say anything.
Law took a deep breath, “they almost got turned to stone, Hancock caught them all staring. Thankfully she wasn’t upset, since we had helped Luffy.”
“Oh that’s good…” you laid back fully, closing your eyes. You had always worked as a somewhat friend to Law, hearing him rant and complain. It made you happy to have a use. It made you especially happy to have Law need you, despite knowing that you didn’t have a chance with him.
Law didn’t speak much in general, so if you wanted to know you kinda had to pry. You wanted to know so badly how he ended up lecturing beside Hancock, but you also did not want to know at all.
“So.. you weren’t staring with them?” You felt your heart quicken, but you didn’t say anything to take it back.
Law coughed a bit, then explained, “No. she’s pretty but I’m not… attracted to her.”
“Why not? She’s beautiful and she has the perfect body! Plus her hair is perfect and she’s so skinny, anyone could fish her out of water.” You spoke the words before you even realized it, feeling the consequences seconds later when Law hesitated to respond.
“I don’t like…” he paused and smiled into an evil smirk, like it was second nature, “I prefer women who have something I can hold onto.”
You sat up with eyes wide in shock, and mouth agape. “But…”
“What? I’m not allowed?” Law looked at you now, and you could swear there was something in his eyes. Something that you could get extremely familiar with.
While you remained there speechless, Law finished on your leg. As he smoothed the bandages over the slice, you stared at his hands.
“I’m done. Just make sure you take it easy for 3 days, unless you want it to reopen.” Law stood, turning swiftly and started to clean his tools and pack his equipment.
“You don’t like Hancock at all?” You called out from the hospital bed.
“No. I like people with something to hold onto. Like you.” Law turned slightly, you could just barely see his face enough to tell he was being serious.
“Oh! Uhm!”
“I like people who have soft thighs I can use as pillows, people who have a belly for me to grab while spooning, people that have a butt and love handles. I like to grab them and watch…”
Your eyes were wide, unsure of why he was telling you this and why he wouldn’t stop.
“I like people who have meat on their bones. Plus when a person like that is drowning, only a real man can save them. I can lift you, and I can lift you when you're soaked too.”
“Law I.. why are you,” you couldn’t think of the words you wanted to use, until Law interrupted.
“Why would I tell you?” You nodded fervently, “I’m telling you because I hope you’ll do something about it.”
You stared at him, he seemed so far from you. He wasn’t at all but you felt weird trying to stand on your leg that was freshly patched. So you motioned for him to come over to you with your hand.
“Why?” He was walking over as he spoke.
“I have to tell you something..” you motioned for him to come closer, so he did.
You again motioned for him to come closer, and he rolled his eyes but did again.
You leaned forward and closed the gap between you two, whispering to him “my type in men.. its men who are named Law.”
He turned his head towards yours in shock, and you chuckled. He took the opportunity of the proximity and pressed his lips to yours. Your chuckle died in your throat, as you pressed back into him.
It felt like magic. His lips were soft, and soo warm. You were convinced such a cold steely man would have a matching body.
Then you realized, all this time. Law wasn’t cold, he was just caring in a different way. He had answered every question you had. He never put you down, and he seemed to like you the way you are.
#trafalgar law x reader#one piece x reader#law x y/n#law x reader#trafalgar d law x reader#reader insert#gender neutral reader#ARGH#this was a struggle for me to like plan out#but i feel good with the direction it went#i also realized i dont write to like#create a world or make beautiful images#i write to pretend like fictional characters can receive the love and feelings i have for them
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i wanna hear more abt logan being called mommy… hes like such this basic american man i wanna see him get feminized!!
LOGAN SARGEANT FEMINIZATION HCS
WARNINGS: Feminization, and all the stuff that comes with that so if you don’t like it, don’t read
So like i said in my initial post Logan loves to be called mommy because it makes him feel so fucking hot and so fucking sexy but i don't think it's the only title/thing Logan likes to be called. I think he would also be very receptive to being called princess and pretty girl. Like he would absolutely melt into a puddle when you call him those things. Bonus if you call him your pretty princess, cause like he's dead, deceased, gone and went to heaven.
Anygay onto my next thought. I think he loves to get all dressed up pretty for you like lingerie, dress, heels, makeup, nails, wig. And let me tell you he looks fucking gorgeous in it. He's the prettiest girl in the whole world and you make sure he KNOWS that. Which makes him kinda shy and blushy but it's so fucking cute that you can't help but continue to praise him and worship.
He also loves to be fucked when he's all pretty for you because he loves seeing the aftermath. Like makeup ruined, wig messed up, dress and lingerie ripped, hanging off his body. He feels like a fucking slut when he's like that and he absolute loves that feeling.
Another thing I think he likes is when you make fun of his dick. Calling it his clit and his hole his pussy. Ugh, it gets that man painfully hard when you call them that.
I don't think humiliation is the only thing he's into. I think he also very much likes manhandling, breeding, hair pulling, spanking, orgasm control. There is something about these that, when done makes him feel very feminine. Especially if they're done in a short time of one another.
Also, think he genuinely has very girly moans and whimpers so he doesn't even have to play them up. He's also VERY loud so you will probably be getting noise complaints if you live in an apartment or getting it on at hotel. But you can deal with all the complaints because why would you want to quiet your pretty girl? His noises are so fucking hot and it also embarrasses him when you get a complaint. And he looks so fucking cute all embarrassed because he can't help that he's loud.
Another thing he can't help is how dirty he feels when you have him wear panties under his clothes when he goes out. Like you have him run errands with them on and it's so dirty because no one knows just the two of you and that gets him a little hard.
Also don't get me started on having him wearing panties under his racing gear. He's practically cumming in his panties because now he has to interact with so many people and pretend everything is completely normal like he doesn't have the sluttiest panties on under his gear.
But everything is worth the treat he gets when you guys get back to your hotel. But that's something we can talk about another time if you guys want to hear about it.
#logan sargeant#f1#logan sargeant x male reader#logan sargeant x reader#f1 x male reader#f1 x reader
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Tryout.
Anon Ask: Tyz Eren eating Mikasa's pussy into the men's locker room
Summary: Since they began dating, they discovered a few things. One of those being the need to fuck whenever and wherever, only they exist in their world, it was a duty for them to pleasure one another.
Warnings: fluff. jealousy, whiny eremika, territorial eremika, they love each other a lot. nsfw. dry humping, inappropriate touching, oral sex (f. receiving), masturbation, public sex, creampie, choking.
Notes: this will probably be in one of the chapters. it’s a little something because i miss tyz a lot so i needed to write their horny selves. not my best but not my worst either. this is for the thirsty of us out here. i’m happy to be back!!! hope you guys like it.
There was one thing they were eager to try together.
The gym.
Despite their well defined bodies, they were not gym goers, they had done a lot of sports in their youth, from when they were infants till before university. That was pretty much why they did not go to the gym to maintain themselves. The restless sex they had was probably the only thing they were doing to stay fit.
So, they came up with this, after having sex, on how they should try more things to do together. Going to the gym seemed to be their first option.
In the following days they started to look for a place to go, their universities were excluded since in each they needed to be a student. They ended up finding one that had a schedule of 24 hours which worked well with their classes and work.
A week after the first conversation they walked in the gym, signing up for a single day just to see how it would fare.
They separated, each walking their respective locker room and since then the problem in their own heads began to start. There were a lot of good looking people, painfully so, and while secure in one another, they were annoyed with others.
Mikasa got out with only her phone and bottle, wearing leggings but still with a jacket that she would take off later. Eren met her halfway, wearing a simple Nike white T-shirt and black sweatpants. “What should we do first? Warm up?” She nodded and they walked towards the empty spot.
Stretching out in front of each other still felt too much. His eyes were wondering and hers did the same. There were too many positions that he was already willing to try by looking at her alone touching the tip of her feet.
“Stop it.” She scolded but was just as amused. “I will start with the treadmill, hurry up.” She pecked his lips as he did his last warmup.
Taking his phone and bottle from the ground, he didn’t expect to find anyone beside him. But here there was already a girl that he was sure had seen him kissing his girlfriend. “Do you need something?”
She giggled. “I was wondering if you could be my partner, i need someone to spot. I’m Elena, you’re new here, aren’t you?”
He wouldn’t be for long, he was thinking to leave right then, the fact he saw Mikasa taking her sweatshirt off, leaving her in her sports bra and leggings was enough to distract that thought. “Can’t do.” He bluntly said. He tried to take a step to the side just to be blocked.
He was a polite person, but his patience was being tested. “Oh, come on. It’s just a workout, I’m sure your girlfriend won’t mind at all.”
“But I do mind. Get lost, someone is already trying hitting on her.” He muttered the last part, pushing past the girl and into her direction where now a guy their age stayed at the side of her treadmill talking to her.
“You don’t have to lie to me. Let me take you out.” The guy seemed to whine. He heard her sigh from a distance. “I told you already i’m taken.”
“Love?” “‘ren, what took you so long?” She stopped her walk to turn around and kiss him. “Obstacles. Hi there, mate, do you need something?” He asked the guy there. But now flustered, he just stuttered a no and left the scene.
“I don’t like it.” Mikasa said out loud as he started with his walk as well. “Maybe we should have gone on a hike or something.”
He laughed at her cuteness. Mikasa was frustrated, she had told the guy that she was not available more than a couple of times but only when Eren came, he backed off. And, on top of that, she had seen the girl trying to take him.
After about twenty minutes, they decided to start their own programmed routines at a couple of meters of one another, they would get involved only when help was needed.
Eren couldn’t ignore the looks Mikasa was getting as she went for the leg press. His girl was undeniably sexy but the world didn’t need to know, his jaw clenched as he continued on his own, unless someone approached her there was no worry for him. People just had to stay away.
As he finished his arms quickly, he went up to her. “I can’t even be mad at you.” He just said, looking at her, focused, pretty, edible.
“As if. Just try to ignore it. I do that when I see them looking at your crotch.” she said, taking a deep breath after. “Well… crotch is one thing, they are looking from head to toe.” He whined, standing up, reaching for the necklace around her neck. His finger caressed it, then he met her eyes and he felt a jolt in his body.
“Uh-uh, don’t look at me like that.” He let it go, retreating his hand before wrapping it around her. “You know that.” He pinched the bridge of his nose, suddenly feeling his cock slightly hardening. Just one look. He was gone by just one look.
“I didn’t do anything.” She shrugged, she liked the power she had but couldn’t help the mutual feeling starting to light in her. Looking around she felt satisfied at seeing a few girls getting disinterested.
As soon as she finished, Eren accompanied her to spot for her. They were too close to each other, as she prepared he stood there, caressing the bare skin of her stomach, her leg slightly grazed his dick, giving enough indication on how this would end. “Don’t play with me.” She ignored his words, getting into stance by pushing her ass onto him, he took half a step back with his jaw clenched.
He was growing restless, each squat she humped against him, he was sure if he checked he’s find a wet spot right on her pussy. That thought alone made him want to just take her right then and there. “I’m horny.” She whispered.
He grinned fully. “Fuck you.” He chuckled his words, kissing her sweet spot on her neck. Making her back into him dangerously so. He had grown a full boner by then. As her set finished and not even a full hour passed in this gym, he was taking her away. “We’re done out here.” She couldn’t erase the smile on her face, she just watched him drag her into the men’s locker room.
By the time they were in, their lips were eagerly kissing one another, moans and groans going along with the touching, his hand quickly went into her pants finding it exactly how he wanted. Wet and ready for him to take. Laying down his t-shirt on the counter under her, he roughly took her leggings off.
He didn’t think twice in digging into her, his tongue moving around, in and out her pussy, pressing against her clit in the middle of the men’s locker room. Her hand went into his hair, grabbing a fistful of it. She tried to suppress her moans as she felt the pleasure all over her. As her eyes suddenly went to him, she could see his arm moving and the only thought had her close to the edge.
“Not yet, love, you were teasing me too much.” He said, his own hand taking care of his erection while the other held her down as she tried to ride him.
He was now going for single licks from down up, her body was spasming needing to release. “I won’t do it again.” She whined, her hand going to grip his forearm. “Please, Eren, I was just- annoyed. Please!” Her hips tried to lift with no effort.
She let go of his hair as he went up to kiss her. She moaned tasting herself on him, her hand going down to his cock, taking it into her hand, stroking it while rubbing it into her. “I know, we are not coming back here.” He said, thrusting himself into her at once.
He was fast and deep in his thrusts, his hand wrapped around her neck as her body bounced at the force. She moaned in his mouth, marking his back painfully more. There was little she could, she loved when he took charge and pleased her.
It was quick though, a quickie, thrilled from doing it when someone could just walk in and the pent up annoyance of the last forty to fifty minutes in this gym.
Her legs wrapped around him as she came and he thrusted in her the last time, filling her up, kissing her even more fiercely. this woman made him mad. Pulling out was a pain, he tucked himself in helping her down. “Go in the shower, I’ll take care here.” He said collecting their things.
“I don’t have my change.” “I do. I kind of suspected this would happen. Go in, before anyone comes in.” She ran in, he put their things in the duffel bag, taking out his change and her own, that were his clothes technically.
Appropriately so, someone entered the locker room a minute later. He sneaked in the shower, controlling himself from doing anything more when he saw her there. Drying off after the shower she waited there for him to bring her clothes and without worry enough they were able to sneak out the locker room unharmed.
She went to hers, getting her things and they were happily out of there. “This was a failure.” He said as they walked hand in hand. “But it’s another public space added to the list.”
“Shut up. It’s not like we planned all of them. We need more self control.” She said with a pout, the list was getting too long. “You’re laughing but i’m not wearing anything under and that could’ve ended badly.”
“Remind me about that when we get home.” That reminder was enough for him, he was ready for a round two or round one as a quickie couldn’t really count at all. As for anything the gym was a failed tryout.
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smth smth about 'the thing that the character did that you thought was rly rly funny in the moment is actually linked to a terrible trauma that lies within said character.' or wahtever.
#jrwi show#jrwi fanart#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#made this within a short span of wahtever bc i gotta go up to the mountains for my stupid gay job tonight n im trying#nnot to frrRREAAAK THE FUCK OUUTTTTTTi dont wanna work but. get that bread we fuckin shall i guess#ONWARDS TO THE FISH TORMENT!! sometimes flowers feel pain when you trim them before their blossoming. atleast i imagine so#i used to draw gillion with loooong hair tied into a big ol braid. and then it was confirmed that he had short hair when he was little.#AT FIRST I WAS SAD. but then i realized the duality of. when they were little. gill had short hair. edyn had long hair.#AND NOW THEYRE OLDER. and gillion has long hair. and edyn has short hair#both mirroring eachother. looking up to eachother. subconsciously or not. they most certainly care. and most certainly miss eachother.#GILLION ALWAYS LOVED HOW LONG HAIR LOOKs. atleast i imagine so. he hasnt cut it since he left the undersea. sure he wanted to go back home#but even at the very start. he knew he was free in some way now. free to grow out his hair. an adventure would await him before he returns.#he knew it would be a while. so he cant let this go. he cant let this sought-after hair-length get cut away from him again#not yet. not yet. i like to think he loved music too. I SAW SOMETHING INTERESTING A BIT AGO#i see alot of ppl commenting on my baby gill comics like;'i wouldFIGHT this teacher i wanna KILL EM i want them DESTROYED#all very good and nice sentiments! i LOVE the energy here! and it would be nice. to have that catharsis#but the story of young tidestrider is not a story of catharsis. it is a story of agony and being so so small and so special and also so dum#and sucking so bad. and just being a kid and doing the things that a little kid does and so many tired tired people reacting badly to it#youre supposed to be the hero that will save us. our world hangs in the balance and you are the one who tips the scales.#YOU are supposed to SAVE US!! you NEED to SAVE US! CAN YOU PLEASE STOP SQUIRMING IN YOUR STUPID CHAIR!!#you'd think that young tidestrider ought to prevail. and be tucked someplace all safe and sound.#elders gone missing and rotting in a jail. their cultists nowhere around. but theres no happy endings. not here not now.#this tale is all sorrows n woes. you may dream that justice n peace win the day. but thats not how this story goes#BIG ideas for this lil baby gillion series. if anything i make ever gets disproven im killing myself in a well as to poison a water supply
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redeemed Gort au....He gets tadpoled instead of durge....hregrgrggrr...
#so many thoughts about this au#he meets Karlach and she tries to kill him but he's like “woah there i have amnesia I'm sorry for selling you”#and she's constantly weary of him despite him doing good actions#and sometimes scamming people but he's still good#he meets Ketheric and bro starts having war flashbacks because now that gort is back he has to deal with gort and lythe making out again#OH YEAH LYTHE#lythe gets visited by bhaal and bane and bane is like#“yo you're kinda swaggy and my chosen is gone#wann be my new chosen?“#and lythe says sure and lets orin take her place as Bhaal's chosen#and then gort gets to Baldur's gate and lythe goes fucking crazy and tells him “kill my sister” and he goes “ok” because bhaalspawn pussy#goes hard#anyways she's archduchess of Baldur's gate and reminds gort that he's chosen of bane#and then gort goes to kill orin and then tries to go to the iron throne but the keyword here is tried because#lythe catches him and leaves him and the gang to die#but he leaves and then finds Lythe at the morphic pool with the netherstones#and she's fucking crazy so she tries to kill him#but fails and disappears#and then they save the world YIPPE#Sorry for the note rambles I'm just autistic#bg3#enver gortash#baldurs gate 3#baldur's gate 3#cedar rambles#bg3 gortash
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there is nothing that i personally enjoy more than the idea of the men in olathe having vague pre-flash connections to each other that they have no real way of knowing or remembering anymore
like nern’s wife was the overly chatty receptionist at terry’s cardiologist, but nern and terry have never realized that they're talking about the same woman when they tell stories of their pre-flash life around the campfire. birdie was friendly with olan’s wife because one of the hoyt girls was the same grade as joey, and they were pals, but birdie isn't lucid enough to remember the last name of his kid's friend, and olan never talks about his wife and kids and wasn't involved enough to have known the names of his daughters' friends, so they have no idea. geese has taught a handful of the younger party members, and the kids/younger siblings of some of the party members, but nobody who knew geese as "mr. thompson" is really gonna make that connection nowadays, and hell if geese is gonna say anything. a bunch of the guys went through ajeet's tollbooth every day on the way to work, but it was such a nothing interaction that they don't really remember him, and he doesn't really remember them, beyond a vague "he's got a familiar face" type feeling. fly and garth used to get into heated internet arguments over anime without ever knowing they lived in the same town IRL and their spirited discussions are always cut short by the other guys before they can place how familiar this back and forth feels
just tiny, tiny things that barely matter in the grand scheme of things, like "you were my neighbor and we never talked but the walls were thin so i always heard your old records" or "our sisters were friends but now they're both dead so we have no way of knowing" or "your favorite coworker was my wife but she’s not around to remember it." possible connections and even possible comfort, (being able to look back on some normal memories, having someone else remember a lost loved one,) but neither person having the context or being stable enough to realize or remember
#this is basically copy-pasted from an old twitter thread of mine so if you saw it there no you didn't#lisa rpg#lisa the painful#olathians pre-flash lives devastate me#and like... statistically some of them must have some connections#the idea that some of these guys might have known each other in a vague sense before the world ended#but the world is so fucked now and so many people are gone that they have no way of ever knowing...#it hurts man
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hi tumblr im pyrr pyrriax and im in my trimonthly artist arc, lord help me and all the projects that are currently sitting in my drafts while i am lured in by the siren song of drawing
#haunted ecosystem#this is not helping with how much my hands hurt on a daily basis this is why i type and dont handwrite/draw very much.#im lured in regardless and i really need to find an artform that doesnt Hurt but for now. digital art <3#like theres a difference between my dumb doodles (quick easy not much different from regular computer usage) and actual art#but im an artist at heart i spent sooooo long being an artist and thinking i was shit at writing. that is wrong! im actually kinda good#im rambling in tags today because i have been not social (my partner is in genshin hell and my beloved is. somewhere.)#okay but on another note i reread the first. couple chapters of wtds this morning? the pacing is a little weird and the tense is fucked#but its actually a lot better than i thought it was? you can tell i was fleshing everybody out in my head and i totally forgot about how#i described the watcher [who i am STILL redacting the name of until we get there] and just. ough. pandora being very logical#and then jumping to the latest chapter and fucking sobbing because i forgot about how it went and just. pandora and his.#whatever the fuck is wrong with him.#i have gotta start recommending people read that again. its surprisingly friendly without context because of how i approached it#that fic has taught me so many things its actually a little comical. it also made me relearn how to make and write ocs so thats fun#once i finish that main fic (and i WILL i am actually planning to sign up for a thing. im finishing it i swear.) i finally get to show off#more of the world and characters ive crafted. showing backstories and what-ifs and all these oneshots ive been keeping close to my chest#for like absolutely ages because i dont want any spoilers on my tumblr#and. im finishing that fic in pseudo-memoriam of somebody who deleted their accounts everywhere. still miss you dane!#ok this has completely gone off topic ily tumblr im going back to drawing and i might make a new pfp#it'll still be lavius but it'll be fray lavius since i think about him a lot and i like his color palette.
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need Guz to hug me tightly for like an hour solid oh my god dhdjdkl I went driving for the first time in over a year and I chewed my lip raw 😭😭
I'm starting to look like a caricature of Anxiety with all these physical symptoms and signs LMAO
#this is so ridiculous fhfjdkdl#i do not like driving fjdkdl i know i should not be on the roads#but unfortunately i have to bc i live rural and also my parents insist i ''just need more practice''#practice is not going to fix the dissociation 😭😭 practice will not fix the Other Drivers being shitty and scary and reckless fjfkdl#it might make it slightly easier bc i wont have to think as hard about shoulder and mirror checks and roadsigns and speed limits#and where i am located on the road and intersection rules and whatnot#but like... it does not fix that i live in a town (and world lol) where ppl are fucking bonkers on the road#i had someone riding my ass for like a full five minutes. we had only two feet btwn us. MAYBE. IF THAT MUCH.#he was BIG mad that i was going the speed limit#and THERES A POLICE STATION LIKE RIGHT NEAR THAT AREA MY GUY IM NOT GONNA GO OVER THE SPEED LIMIT RIGHT THERE LMAO ????#also im a rule follower usually so i do tend to go Exactly the speed limit fjfkdl#and maaannn that makes people SO fucking angry dhfjdl its impossible to drive Anywhere without having someone right on ur bumper#its so ridiculous like... that's not helping anyone ??? ur not getting to ur destination faster by riding up on somebodys ass ???? hewwo ???#ANYWAYS. i drove around the neighborhood and then went up the highway and thru some intersections and then into the main core of town#and then i got my dad to take over from there bc it was lunch hour and the core of town is a lawless land at the best of times#MY NERVES ARE FRIED. i need Guz to act as a weighted blanket or one of those pressure therapy vests for me LOL#im like... shaking fhdjsl that was far more than i thought we were going to do for driving today good lord#IM OKAY THOUGH I SURVIVED I DIDNT EVEN HIT A CURB OR ANYTHING#i think I've only hit a curb once so far in all my times driving and that was on my second time driving on a road i think#so pretty good track record... im a very careful driver fjdkdl i work so hard to be safe and drive smoothly#during my driving test the only thing the test guy had to critique was that i waited at an intersection when i could've gone#but the reason i waited was bc i wasnt sure i could make it across the traffic lane before the oncoming vehicle got to us#so it was like. a safe decision overall but a little too hesitant which can actually be unsafe fjdkdl#AUGH ANYWAYS SORRY FOR RAMBLING SM#driving stresses me out so bad and my lip is all raw now and i have so many physical stress symptoms the past few days fhfjdl#after tonight i should be able to calm down a bit hopefully fhfkdl theres a thing we're going to tonight thats been stressing me out so bad#but after tonight it'll be over and hopefully I can get myself settled down again fjfjdkl#dandy.cmd#vent //
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#fuck dude#my job is basically verifying int’l client addresses for a virtual bank#(to make sure they’re real people or smth)#which like ofc i have clients#in places like tel aviv#and i just scroll down the map to gaza#and just zoom around and cry#there’s a pin of a theme park on the coast#it’s all colorful and looks like it could be anywhere in the world#but it’s probably gone now#along with so much else#how many memories lived there#how many moments were spent on those colorful rides#the juxtaposition of joy overlayed with horror and death is just fucking devastating me#fuck
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the samsteve meet cute.........”it’s your bed isnt it? its too soft”............”everyone we know wants to kill us” “not everyone”.......................”when do we start”............................AND THEN STEVE JUST LEAVES HIM. TO GO BACK TO PEGGY WHO WE HAVE ALREADY SEEN HAVE A LIFE OF HER OWN AND STEVE HAS ALREADY MADE HIS PEACE WITH LOSING HER AND HAS BECOME FRIENDS WITH HER FOR REAL AFTER COMING BACK.
#when she calls him a drama queen like they are friends yes she forgets and its the heartbreak all over again when she sees him#but like. legiterally one scene did so much work for their relationship and did it so well like it's sad it's tragic it's heartbreaking but#steve made his peace with it. peggy made her peace with it. they will never be who they were again but they have something else now.#and steve leaves behind the entire life he built he leaves behind all these people just to unravel the past. when it doesnt make any sense#for his character!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he just passes the shield off to sam and leaves him.#the steve i know would never the steve EYE know broke sam out of ultramegasupermax and gave him a stupid little smile the whole time!!!!!!!#hes a fugitive on the run the whole world hates him now and he breaks into the raft so he can break sam out and then sam is dusted and#steve is left all alone AGAIN. he loses so many people who have become his family and the one he needs help grieving is PEGGY?????#SAM LITERALLY WENT TO HER FUNERAL WITH HIM. HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW PEGGY AND HE WENT TO BE THERE FOR STEVE.#AND THE ONE STEVE IS ALL BROKEN UP OVER IS PEGGY. AND WHEN SAM FINALLY FUCKING COMES BACK. AFTER BEING GONE FOR#FIVE YEARS OR WHATEVER. AFTER STEVE DOES HIS ENTIRE LITTLE TIME TRAVEL NUMBER TO GET HIM AND BUCKY AND EVERYONE#ELSE BACK STEVE JUST LEAVES HIM???? SAM LITERALLY CAME BACK AND THE FIRST THING HE SAID WAS ON YOUR LEFT.#DOES THAT MEAN NOTHING TO YOU STEVE ROGERS. WHO THE FUCK WROTE THAT MOVIE YOU DONT DESERVE ON YOUR LEFT KILLING YOU KILLING YOU KILLING YOU#im okay :) btw. im super chill abt this. i dont even care really.#speaking
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When I was making my first trying-to-be-serious ocs it was in the start of the 2010s (and I mean the START, 2010-2012) and there was a big “anti Mary-sue” movement on deviantart (the website I spent half my internet time on and was posting my art on) and I liked to make my character designs pretty extra (although compared to modern stuff they look pretty normal) so I started to get self-conscious. At the time though I was watching soul eater (and there was another thing I’m forgetting and it’s really frustrating me) and I saw that I was popular with a cool art style and the characters were extra AF, so I was like “okay. Maybe, as long as I can draw my character often and consistently it doesn’t matter if they are wild!” and you know what? Early teen me was RIGHT. Not about many things, but about this in particular she was!
#emma posts#girl was relying too heavily on character tropes and some stuff of that era#but she was so right about character design#if maybe using a few too many colors for each one#now people are just being wild with it and it fucking works#two examples I can think of in modern popular animation are mha/bnha and hazbin hotel (still haven’t watched that one)#but damn if those characters don’t look like some of my favorite early teen creations#and the artist made it WORK#i don’t think I’ve gone quite as wild as bnha but you know what? one of my old worlds still could#I’m sentimental about that one and even if I’ve been stuck I’m still taking that one with me forever#other projects might come and go. but (project currently named absolution) is constant#as well as its main cast. I’ve been learning a bit more about some of the mythologies I used as inspiration and it’s been giving a lot of#ideas for how I can develop things. it has not solved a few hang ups though#the biggest one being what was the divide about and how was it defined?’#it’s been made more gray as I learn more about mythology and folklore#the Christian aspects of it can be a bit clear. but others have more gray areas and i like it but it also makes things a bit frustrating#interestingly enough. flight rising having so many different species on one world has given me some ideas#I am a bit reluctant to use too much from outside certain cultures though. which can appear a bit biased and probably is. but I don’t want#to mess up something you can’t really change about a creature from a culture in less familiar with. it would be a dick move#but yeah. if death the kid can exist my weirdos can as well
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People are talking about not voting for Biden.
Again.
I'm just so tired of this argument.
I just can't do Trump again.
I can't.
His incompetence killed so many people. A panel estimated 40% of COVID deaths could have been averted.
One of those deaths was my mother.
She was killed because people didn't trust the vaccines and they didn't think masks were worth the inconvenience. That man could have gone on TV and said "This is the Trump vaccine and it is great." He could have sold fucking MAGA masks on his website. He had 100% influence over his dipshit followers and could have used that for the greater good. But he was too vain to wear a mask in public and bungled the vaccine rollout.
And now I worry some of my trans loved ones may not make it through another far right administration. They have this giant target on their back right now and conservatives seem determined to eradicate as many trans lives as possible.
I wrote a whole ass post about how I didn't care for Biden. I still don't. But when I try to imagine what a right wing administration would be doing right now... that seems like it would be a nightmare orders of magnitude worse than the current nightmare.
As someone with an untreatable chronic illness, I know the feeling of being presented with choices where all of them suck. And I have had to survive by choosing the least sucky option over and over.
It feels bad every single time.
I hate it.
And I still fucking choose.
It should be different. There should be better choices. I shouldn't have to choose the least bad thing among all bad things.
But there are people and things in this world I feel are worth sticking around for, so I continue to choose the least sucky thing.
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https://www.tumblr.com/qqueenofhades/743255237060689920/the-thing-that-confuses-me-about-the-dont-vote
The “don’t vote” left’s point is basically that, if Biden gets a second term, it’ll basically signal that “They’ll vote for us as long as we’re not Republicans, why don’t we do some REAL fucked up shit, if we can get away with it?” It takes the power out of the people’s hands and places it firmly in the party’s.
I can’t completely disagree with that, my caveat is that there’s no real alternative system or party in place, because top-down change is ineffective; a third party president has to contend with a two party congress.
Except no. This whole "Biden just wants to do as much fucked up shit as possible while not being a Republican, and if you give him a second term he'll do more fucked up shit deliberately to spite you" mindset is only possible as an interpretation if you a) deliberately and comprehensively ignore everything he has done to date, and b) you approach the situation with the maximum bad faith possible. Not to mention, the ultimate outcome of this Big Important Teaching Biden A Lesson is that Trump gets back into power and makes everything orders of magnitude worse, because he does in fact want to deliberately do evil shit to everyone and says so at every opportunity. There is not some magical happy alternative that springs into existence by not voting. If you choose this as a year to Teach Biden A Lesson, you are enabling Trump. Trump will be much, much worse. If you don't care about that, I still do not care what your Great Ideology is. You are not helping anyone and you are directly and irreversibly hurting everyone.
I made a post a few days ago wherein I mentioned that I want to assess Biden fairly, taking into account both strengths and weaknesses, but the rampant bad-faith, lying, misreading, misrepresentation, and open sabotage of him (especially by the online left; the GOP sometimes only wishes they were as good at turning Biden's voter pool against him) makes it really difficult to do that. My frustration with those people makes me just want to go "BIDEN IS GREAT THE END." I know he is a flawed old man (though by literally every account of a career spent in public service, he really does care about making the world a better place and any remotely good faith reading of his accomplishments thus far can see that). It is also very likely that he goes MORE left in a second term because he won't have to face the electorate again, he has always gone more left when pushed before, and he's not actually the scheming genocidal mastermind that leftist social media paints him as. Shocking, I know.
I know there are things in the world we don't like and don't want and want to stop, and therefore we blame our own president for not making it stop. But I have zero, no, none, absolutely none whatsoever sympathy for this pseudo-populist "WE NEED TO TEACH BIDEN A LESSON BY ELECTING TRUMP AGAIN, I AM VERY MORAL MUCH ACTIVIST" mindset. There's this funny thing about America wherein it is still (for now) a democracy. If Biden wins a second term, he can't run again. I would take literally anything these people said more seriously if they focused on developing their dream progressive successor for 2028 (and also figured out how to get that person elected and in a place to make real change) rather than cynically sabotaging Biden in the most consequential election year, again, of our lifetimes. If you don't like him now, find a way to make his successor a better option. Throwing a toddler tantrum and handing the country back to a senile, deranged, fascist, revenge-riddled, theocratic Trump HELPS. NOBODY. I still don't know how many times I'm going to have to say that, but yeah.
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one sentence summaries of every TMA episode
(1-60 i'll add more soon)
part 2 up!
world's most effective anti-smoking PSA
man DOES NOT open coffin. everyone claps.
woman is judgemental towards neighbor even though she has hobbies that are just as weird.
book makes multiple people fall off chair.
man finds bag of teeth and decides he absolutely needs to fuck around and find out.
worm sti.
there was a SCARY MAN in the WAR.
fuck this tree
well at least ted bundy was a great father :)
i'm like 55% sure vampires are real and i'm willing to take those odds
bitches be dying. you're next.
we kill this man because he made the soda too warm.
sorry ur husband's dead. maybe get some help.
Unbox with me ! (GONE WRONG)
hah i'm safe from this one because i have decided to Never Go Into a Cave Ever.
man is so annoying about this spider that even his cat can't be bothered
man's bully finds a book about a Bone Turner and subsequently begins turning people's bones.
this guy sucks at DIY home improvement
aw maybe this priest didn't do anything THAT bad!
oh fuck nevermind
THE SKY ATE MY SON.
the worms stole my identity. i haven't left the house in days.
man beats german children at game of bravery and wins a coin (he later loses this coin)
my ex boyfriend gets casted in the muppets and dies
sorry mom, i've abandoned jesus for a new religion : jesus in the dark.
tall squiggly and HANDsome
old man arm wrestles demon through door knob
the buzzfeed unsolved guys finally catch a ghost but it's their sound tech
immortality but at what cost
working at the big meat factory was so traumatizing it made me vegetarian
i go to america and get almost killed by a furry
well if you love that wasp nest so much why don't you MARRY it (and then she did)
antisocial boat crew bands together to exclude one guy from a midnight party. he dies from the rejection.
bone apple teeth
remember when that norwegian guy threw a tantrum about us not digging a hole? turns out we were right to not dig that hole.
babe come over my parents have taken ill and passed away
man fucks around and it costs him everything
HOMOPHOBIC CHINESE VASE
oh god oh fuck the worms are here
thank you for participating in worms! please rate your wormsperience from 1 to 10.
the wormsperience has left me deeply scarred. i'm going to get lost in a tunnel about it.
🎸music makes me loose control🎸
spooky stories to tell at the next police slumber party
child threatens to run away and join the circus one too many times, and now the circus has come to cash in.
these mosquitoes are mad sus
man frequents local barnes and noble and then dies(?) after liking a book too much.
realtor gets eaten by the backrooms twice. it's a terrible shame.
both me and this weird goth dude have an unsatisfying italy vacation
guy who turns people's bones gets a new job where he continues to turn people's bones.
man who should never be allowed to build prisons builds a prison.
Something Big Is In The Water.
what if u heard me about 15 feet behind you fumbling around and calling out ur name 😳 (and we were both prison guards)
i'm going to be honest i didn't retain anything from this episode except that this guy has the silliest old man voice ever
everybody hates the tax man, including these creepy taxidermy animals
hmmgh. ant house.
so turns out being only 55% sure that vampires are real in my career as a vampire hunter has had some consequences.
the only thing keeping you company in space is your abandonment issues
🎶 the snack that smiles back 🎶 (my husband!)
maybe the real treasure was the house siblings we encased in spider web along the way.
your dead brother wrote books about ancient myths and WHAT
Part 2
#i hope this convinces you to listen to tma#podcast#the magnus archives#martin blackwood#tma#jon sims#sasha james#podcasts#gay podcasts#tim stoker#elias bouchard#peter lukas
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About your language brainrot. I see your "Reader's writing can't match tyvat's long and flowery writing" and bring you "Tyvat isn't used to books over 50 pages long so a short story to the Reader is a whole dictionary to tyvat readers".
Seriously, have you seen how thin the books are? They don't wrote novels, they write short chapters formatted in the way really old stories are. As in, summarizing all the events down into one smooth story then adding a few quotes. Fanfiction writers are insane. They will willingly sit down and write hundreds of words at a time. To them, a proper modern day story of maybe, oh 10k words or so, would probably be like the Oddessy itself.
If we were to combine the two headcanons. It would end up as many historians being intimidated by this insanely long written scripture in the language of the forgotten.
I'm going to take this a step further and say that if the creator asked some people to proofread their things, it would establish a hiarchy of who is able to actually finish the book the creator read and who isn't.
NOW THIS, THIS IS MY FUCKING JAMMMM
I'm so sorry this is so old!! u probably all know this by this point that I've really slowed down as the year has gone on, but I graduated university and then got my first job so its been pretty crazy!
Sun: Reader (you/they/them)
Orbit: Headcanons-ish
Stars: dash of all the book/nerds of Genshin, heavy on Sumeru?
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: Cussing, 16+ Mature Audiences, Spoliers for Sumeru Archon Quests/Scaramouche, & Trigger Warnings: mention of shipping/characters shipping themselves with you.
Comment if any missed, please.
☆
FULL STOP.
THE AKADEMIYA, FONTAINE RESEARCH INSTITUTE, HAVE BEEN WAITTTINNGGGG ON YOUR ASS LMAO
You fall from the fucking sky like a 5 star, or pop out of the Irminsul or whatever
and immediately are mobbed by scholars. LMAO jkjk (not really, bc that's what it’d feel like)
can you even imagine the dread older stories(”the classics” to them), that was instilled in the poor students around Teyvat??
id like to think ur works are the most preserved over the thousands of years of Teyvat archeologists excavating them, in comparison to other authors (teyvat just likes you more, suck it William Shakespeare)
also, bc I cant resist language differences/world building I'm sorryyyy 😭 😭
the vocab of Genshin lang vs. ours, has significantly less vocabulary like their actual dictionary is 1/3 the size of ours type of energy
(Omfg all ur fanfics being considered like insanely long realistic romantic classics or tragedies like Jane Austen-level, and only the richest and biggest play companies put on plays about ur stories bc the script goes on for hours)
(ur plays only get put on for rlly big events bc of this, like Lantern Rite or like a Summer/Winter festival/your birthday, which is, yes, an international holiday)
dude the sheer power move of anything you’ve written being essentially “Journey of the West” to them, like Damnnn.
endless like adaptations, plays, Teyvat-short stories condensing it, (THEIR OWN FANFICTION ABOUT UR STORIES)
the power is, in fact, going to your head every time another scholar both deflates at how long ur stuff is, but also lights up bc they get to read it
speaking of scholars… you know who snatched you up first. you know. you don’t even need to read the next line.
Alhaitham.
sneaky bastard he is, absolutely manipulated, mansplained (and manwhored bc he knows he’s handsome, cheeky little shit) his way into getting you to sit down with him and interview you about both translating other classics, your own, giving your own analysis of others works and ur own, and picking ur brain apart of how/why you wrote urs, etc. its fucking endless,
Kaveh had to come rescue you bc u were starving to death after getting stuck with the Haravatat scholar in his office for nearly 7 hours of interrogation discussion about literature
and Alhaitham wasn't even nearly done, he’d informed you as you left that he already had another appointment for later conversation scheduled (how?? you don't even know ur own schedule??? you have a schedule???) and was looking forward to more of your “creative and enlightening input” :)))
(you’re never going to escape him, not even Nahida herself can save you from his stubborn ass)
On another note, Xingqiu is quaking when you agree to autograph his copy of your stories (of which he has all hard covers of the first edition translations)
Zhongli/Rex Lapis is known for having a near-lifelong passion for searching for your works specifically, and learning how to translate them better into Teyvatian vernacular
like the same way he can absolutely speak on Rex Lapis facts/rocks/adepti info, is the same confidence he speaks about knowing ur work lol
(yes he did also ask for several autographs and another sit-down talk about the works, tho a lot more sneaky then Alhaitham bc he just casually gets u guys into it during dinner)
Barbatos/Venti has written some of the most famous songs based on your stuff, he has his favorites too,
but he always claims the best songs are any that have been written in the story, like either when a character sings something, or there are like quotes from songs ur fanfics are based on lol
(he also demanded to hear what they actually sound like from you, yes, you have to sing them for him lol)
Venti also can surprisingly drunkenly ramble the entirety of at least one of ur stories, like, word for word lmao
(Diluc gave in and did give him a drink on the house for that one, just once, Venti doesn’t remember it lol)
(I forgot to mention, u guys still speak the same language, just like, different versions of it)
ur works being one of the few things all the Archons can freely talk about with each other, like it’s neutral ground bc they’re all fangirling about it lmao
Furina and Neuvillette have had like,, fierce debates over the decades about character dynamics and the general drama of ur stories, they’ve gotten into it enough they’ve stopped talking to each other for a couple days a few times lol
Albedo, Sucrose, Kokomi, Yae Miko, Ei, Raiden, have read every single work they’re gotten their hands on in Teyvat (it took them like a literal year or longer)
Albedo drew you fanart for every single story, bc he’s hyperfixated on everything related to you ngl,
Kokomi had commissioned smaller pocket versions of ur works (which later got popular thanks to Yae Miko) both the OG and the Teyvat shortened versions
THE HARBINGERS ARE THE MOST DOWN BAD LMAO
Childe has literally tried to recreate battle scenes from ur works lmao
and gets especially riled up about fighting someone who resembles any characters from them (esp villains, what a cutie)
You cannot fathom the amount of research throughout Teyvat that has been secretly or indirectly funded by Pantalone/Tsaritsa
from the experts to analyze them, to funding play companies to act them out, to actually excavating places to get more of ur stuff unearthed
(the Harbingers absolutely are the first group of people that got to read several of ur stories first bc of this, like the world’s most exclusive secret book club lol)
Scaramouche used to clown on Childe all the time about how he was too impatient to even “sit down and read the King’s classics”, and he was downright insufferable when he found out about Tartaglia’s habit of recreating battle scenes/that being what motivated him to fight sometimes lol
that being said, Wanderer surprisingly never forgot ur stories.
Even when his memories were wiped for a bit, he found comfort in these fantastical epics still sticking around, even when his old names did not
(he mayyyy or mayyy nottt have secretly namedhimselfafteroneofthetragicprotagonistsherelatesto- )
oh btw, Nahida also found joy and comfort in ur stories when she was trapped, they also helped her literally grow as a person bc she had ur stories to help her sort of process the world/what life was like outside of her dreaming prison 🥺💔❤️🩹
◇
OMFG
ANYWAY FULL TONE SHIFT LMFAO-
the ABSOLUTE SPIRAL-RED-STRING-CONSPIRACY-THEORY-BOARD ENERGY IF THIS WAS A BLUNT LANGUAGE AU LMAOOOO
like specifically how Teyvatians like to give all the context ever thru their words, but older deities/beings like you just do simple phrases that can have deeper meanings (whereas teyvat just explains all the meanings behind their words)
STOP there’s like an official display at the Akademiya and Fontaine Institute of red string theory boards 😭😭 (look what you’ve done to themmm LMAO)
for like every story of urs, INCLUDING THE FANFICS STOP
IMAGINE THE SHIPPING WARS IF U EVER WROTE ONE THAT WASNT EXPLICIT OR LIKE ONE OF THE MAIN ROMANTIC INTERESTS HAD CHEMISTRY WITH OTHER CHARACTERS HAHAHAHAA
that's actually what Akademiya scholars argue about the most viciously, it’s like politics you can’t just bring up ships from ur stories casually in regular convos 💀
(poor Cyno has to deal with a shipping war once a year bc someone always makes the mistake of reading ur work for the first time (without being told to not talk to others abt ships lol) and it starts an all out brawl in the cafeteria every time LMAO)
Also yes.
Cyno is a fanboy.
(he has read Creator x Reader-insert fanfiction.)
(As have most of the characters mentioned, and those not lol)
…
(I'm gonna make a whole Creator x reader fanfic post one day i stg lmao)
☆
an iced coffee? for me?? :0
ok but real talk…
wtf do you guys wanna see for new years!!
i didn't do a inktober/october days thingy bc i felt too unprepared (and bc id wanted to post that 1000+ followers eldritch au for Halloween)
but now i kinda wanna, at least for a few days :o
ill post a poll in a minute, so check it out!! but still, please feel free to comment some ideas here! :)
Safe Travels Deafening Dreamer,
💀♒
If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"
(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily
#this looked a lot longer on desktop#fuck it#anyway sorry if im slower again guys!#i got sick again :(#my voice was completely gone for days#im onyl just recovering#so finally felt decent enough to write more#check out my other posts for the poll btw!#genshin sagau#genshin impact#sagau#genshin isekai#genshin imagines#genshin impact sagau#aqua asks#genshin x reader#self aware genshin#genshin self aware#more like isekai heavily but this does rely on u understanding they could/have had ur stories for years in their world#so kinda#<3 u guys but DO NOT TAG AS YANDERE/DARK#bc its not <3#gonna start putting that reminder in the tags
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NOW IM BACK IN OUR EMPTY APARTMENT, LOOKING AT THE PIECES I WISH WERE YOU ( max verstappen. )
max verstappen x reader
an imperfect relationship between world champion max verstappen and a busy college student now filled with more tension as he fails to hold his tongue after a disappointing race.
authors note: love writing for max, i might have to do it more!!!
HE DIDN'T MEAN FOR THIS TO HAPPEN. it snowballed into something he had imagined before but never would've expected it actually happening to him. he could normally control his temper, especially when it came to her. sure, there was a few moments that stood out in his career when he had gone over the limit on certain occasions, going as far as to push another driver, but he would always separate his home life and his career.
at least he would try to. the australian grand prix hadn't played out like he had wanted, or anyone for that matter, because no one wants their car to get fucked and have to retire. especially on the third lap, it was just embarrassing. he was struggling the entire weekend, though his spirits temporarily lifted when he had managed to get pole position. he knew he would, but after the struggles throughout the practice sessions, he hadn't been too sure.
he just wished she would've been there to see it, but she was stuck in their apartment with their cats, jimmy and sassy. she had to do her college work, that was due all too soon, before she could go running around to his races. despite being financially supported by her talented boyfriend, she wanted things to do when he wasn't around, and while school work wasn't exactly many people's cup of tea, it was hers.
she liked the possibilities that came with the experience and maybe one day, she could land a job that would put her in line with her beloved driver. sure, she loved visiting the paddock as a wag, but she would love it more from behind the scenes. of course dating a driver, she already gets to see more than the average person, but she wanted to do something worthwhile with her time in the paddock.
he understood, but he had the only condition of letting him pay for her schooling. debt wasn't fun, and he wouldn't let her fall into that burden. besides, max would love to be able to see his girl working hard in the paddock, but now he wasn‘t so sure if she was his anymore.
he was agitated, she was stressed, and they both knew they didn't mix. they should’ve just waited to see each other in person, but they were both missing each other at the time.
she watched the race on the tv in their bedroom with her laptop on her lap with her latest, big assignment due in the next few days. she was struggling, and she figured it was better to get as much time to work on it as possible so she opted out of flying to australia. still, she watched, hardly stressed, because she knew max was an amazing driver.
but come the race on sunday, his dnf shocked her. she was riddled with worry and part of her wished she had been there. maybe if she had been, this whole thing could’ve been avoided, but the stress she felt now would’ve only worsened had she been with him.
upon the smoke trailing out of his car, hearing the commentators say he had dropped positions, seeing the puff of smoke when his car rolled down the pit lane, the fire on his brake duct, she shut her laptop instantly. now she was sitting on the edge of the bed, eyeing the screen closely, phone on standby to call him after. she leaned her head on her hands while her elbows dug into her legs.
she watched his tense answers to the media, his uninterested attitude because she knew all he wanted to do was get to his driver's room for peace and sulking. she knew and yet she still made the mistake of calling him right after.
she hadn’t waited long for him to answer, but he didn’t answer right away. hearing no answer from his side of the phone, she spoke first.
“hey,” she spoke as gently and nicely as she could.
“hey.” his voice was short and straightforward, as if he didn’t care about anything she was going to say.
finding the right words to say was like walking on eggshells and there wasn't a lot of room to go. she just hoped she took a step in the right direction when she asked him, “how are you doing?”
“what do you think?” she sighed, biting at the inside of her cheek
“not great,” she muttered, he hummed back in response, which just made her even more unsure of her next words, “ ‘m sorry you has to retire from the race.”
“sorry doesn’t fix the car,” she heard him mumble under his breath, earning a scoff from her.
“excuse me?” her tone was like she had accused him of something, “i get you’re mad right now max, but that doesn’t mean you can be an asshole. i’m just trying to help.”
he scoffed back and she could feel the eye roll he would’ve given her, “yeah, well you're not.”
“what is wrong with you?” she stood up, anger coursing through her.
“i don’t know, maybe the fact that my race was fucked and now you’re bitching to me about my attitude.”
she hadn’t thought before speaking, in moments of high stress she just said whatever she felt, and so did he. what she felt right now was annoyance and anger, “fuck you max,” was all she could spit back, taking a deep breath being speaking again. “news flash, you’re not the only person in the world dealing with shit, it's one race that you got out on, grow up.”
with that she hung up, and he heard the dial tone from his phone, regret beginning to seep past his clothes and into his skin, his nerves, his brain. he just majorly fucked up the most important thing in his life because to him she was more important than his career points, the car, the championship, his entire career, and he just threw her aside in the height of his anger.
he tried calling back immediately after he realized what he had just done, but it had just gone straight to voicemail. when that all failed, he spammed texts, or paragraphs more like, about how sorry he was and how she didn’t deserve the attitude he gave her, but it did nothing.
she sat and watched as the texts and missed calls flooded in. while she understood he was angry, it didn’t give him the right to talk to her like that so she left her phone unanswered while she had gotten up to pack. in less than a few hours, she knew max would be back in this apartment, probably on his knees, begging for forgiveness from her. she knew she would forgive him the moment he did so she wanted to get away before he could.
it didn’t take long, she hadn’t packed her entire life away, but a single suitcase and carry-on bag was enough to last her until she decided to patch things over. taking one last look over her shoulder, one last pet of their cats before she had closed the door behind her. knocking on the apartment door of their neighbors to ask them to care for the felines like they did whenever he left for races and she went alongside him.
but in recent months, moreso in the 2023 season, she found herself attending fewer races than she used to because of the growing tension and stress between the pair. it didn't help that they didn't talk it through, they couldn't because they didn't have the time. she had college, he had formula one, and they both had no time to meet in the middle to amend whatever was broken before. whatever was broken remained as such and only cracked further as time went on and the pressure increased.
they knew they should've come together and met in the middle, but they were both petty and too stubborn. it was another reason they clashed, but they also just worked so well.
he was hoping this was going to be the one time they could've found that time to talk, to sit down and have a deep conversation that lasted hours, that they would've ended up getting side-tracked from and begun to talk about random topics, like they used to. laying on her back with her head in his lap and his fingers through her hair as they laughed at funny memories, or moments they had experienced together.
but when he came home to a quiet, empty apartment, he knew. he knew he shouldn't have hoped for something that was unlikely to happen. his cats rubbed against his legs as he walked about the apartment. dirty dishes that had yet to be washed sitting in the sink, blankets unfolded in the couch and doors left open. the air was stale without her presence and he was left to wallow in it. her absence was a sting against his skin as he kicked off his shoes, seeing a couple pairs less than what there usually was, hanging up his coat alone because hers were now gone.
everything was a reminder if how he had treated her, the words he spat like venom all because he had retired from a single race. he can't stop hearing her venomous last words to him, her tone was like he was the scum on the bottom of her shoe. he might’ve well have been because he sure felt like he was. a piece of trash for the way he spoke, granted he was angry, but he didn't have the right, he never would have the right to talk to her like that.
the floorboards creaked under him, cutting through the silence only interrupted by the sounds of his clothes brushing together as he walked. he peered into the various rooms of the house, seeing half the items she would normally have that had been left behind. pieces of her he was left to further sulk with.
it was cruel, but he understood cruel was what he deserved. he deserved seeing the messy, unmade bed that remained empty for hours after she left. covers pulled back like she had just gotten up to see him, except she hadn't.
she was gone, and he hadn't known where, or if she would even come back. he could only hope that she wished to mend their cracked and shattered relationship as much as he wanted now.
he could only hope.
—
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proofread by @foreveralbon <333
#formula 1#formula 1 drivers#formula one#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#max verstappen x you#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen fic#mv33#max verstappen imagine#mv1#max verstappen#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen angst#mv1 x you#mv1 fic#mv1 x y/n#mv1 imagine#mv1 x reader#mv33 x reader#mv33 imagine#mv33 fic#mv33 x you
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