#bro is (cartoonishly) in the dark!!!
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Day 38 of Flowey
#bro is (cartoonishly) in the dark!!!#i actually had to draw his eyes different than how i usually do bcs... um...#the way i usually draw his eyes... wouldn't show up on a black background...#daily flowey#flowey#undertale#flowey undertale#undertale flowey
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“Sometimes,” Gareth drawls. He’s sitting behind his kit, twirling a drumstick in his fingers, thoughtful. “Sometimes I think this town really is cursed.”
“Dude.” Jeff warns.
“Let me finish. I think this town is cursed, and Eddie’s a part of it—”
“Dude!”
“Let me finish! Town’s cursed, Eddie’s involved, but he’s not the source. He’s a victim.”
Jeff and Francis exchange a look.
”And the true source.” He rises, getting on a roll. “The true source is hiding in plain sight, something—”
He cuts his eyes at them.
“—or someone no one would expect. The true source...” He whirls his drumstick with a dramatic flourish then snaps his arm to its full extension and points outward, into the wild blue yonder that is the world beyond his parents’ garage. “...is Him.”
Him, being: Steve Harrington, parked at the end of the driveway. Steve Harrington, opening the passenger side door of his rich boy Beemer. Steve Harrington, who drove Eddie to band practice. Who’s shouldering Eddie’s gig bag. Who’s helping Eddie out of the car.
Jeff and Francis watch for a moment in silence, then turn back to Gareth in sync.
”An interesting theory.”
”Elaborate.”
“Consider the facts, boys!” He holds his drumstick to his mouth to pantomime smoking a pipe. It doesn’t really work but he’s committed to it now. “Prior to The Unfortunate Occurences Which Shan’t Be Named...”
Francis crosses himself backwards. Jeff looks down, shielding his eyes and murmuring, “That Which Shan’t Be Named.” It’s the only way they can cope with what happened last spring. It’s that or face the reality that their friend almost died horribly; that he was hunted for sport by a town that still looks at him sideways, still has not acknowledged any wrongdoing; that there’s a gap in Eddie’s retelling of What Really Happened he can’t or won’t explain, and in that gap Eddie was almost destroyed, was so brutalized he was hospitalized for a month and semi-comatose for half of it. That Eddie is different now. Wounded. Skittish. Not small, never small. But smaller.
That’s too much, man. So they make it a Bit.
“...Our darling Edward would have never associated with the likes of that.”
(That is currently smoothing down the collar of Eddie’s new battle jacket, nose wrinkling as the stubborn curl of the denim refuses to lay flat.)
”A jock? Hah! A jock and a yuppie? Hah and hah a-gain! But now, in the hereafter of...” He falters. “Certain Events...he has emerged unscathed—”
“He is not unscathed,” Jeff corrects.
“He is extremely scathed,” Francis adds. “Mentally, physically and emotionally scathed.”
“He’s scathed to shit dude.”
“He has emerged unscathed,” Gareth barrels on, shooting them a look that says this is supposed to be a monologue. “But for one critical difference. Not only does he tolerate this...interloper’s existence, but he actively seeks out his company! I daresay he enjoys it! Thrives on it! Our jester is holding court in the empty kingdom of a fallen king!”
Francis laughs but Jeff frowns. “That’s a little mean.”
“Ah, but is it untrue?”
“Still.”
“Fine, sorry, jeez.”
(The fallen king is now holding the jester’s collar down with one hand and furiously rubbing at it with his fist, scowling like the fabric personally offended him. “You should have let me iron this,” he huffs, and the way Eddie watches Steve is so cartoonishly fond Gareth half expects a menagerie of woodland creatures to scamper out of the brush and sing a song about it.)
Satisfied, Jeff gets back on board. He hums, his mouth a grim line, voice dropping to the bottom of his register. “And you suspect the Dark Arts?”
“What other explanation could there be?” Gareth lifts his steepled fingers to his mouth, forgetting he is still holding the drumstick, and tips it forward so it doesn’t go right up his nose. He glowers in the pair’s general direction. “What do we truly know about this Hair-ington? What secrets does that follicle fortress hold? What Black Magic does this strapping sorcerer wield that has so bewitched our beloved bro?”
Francis snorts.
“The black magic is that Steve’s hot, and Eddie wants to kiss him.”
Gareth and Jeff stare at him, slack-jawed. Francis shrugs.
“Look I’m not into the guy but let’s call a spade a spade.”
Gareth shifts his weight to one leg, his theatrics flushing out of him. “I’m running out of steam on this, can we just talk about Eddie’s stupid crush on Steve Harrington?”
“Oh my god PLEASE.”
“I have been WAITING for someone to bring it up”
“I’ve never seen him like this. He is gone. He is smitten.”
“I’d go so far as to say he is straight up besotted my dude!”
“Cupid’s arrow flew true and it got him right between the fucking eyes.”
It’s not the first time Eddie’s had a crush, or the most embarrassing. It’s not even that the guys are worried about what would happen if they roasted Eddie to his face—Eddie can dish it out as well as he can take it, mostly. But whatever Eddie has with Steve feels…untouchable. The first time Steve dropped him off Gareth tested the waters with something light, something along the lines of, “you think he’s gonna give you his letterman jacket?” Instead of laughing it off, Eddie dimmed, and he answered, quietly, “Steve’s just a friend.” The subject hasn’t been broached since.
But perhaps Eddie just can’t see the forest for the trees. Because from the band’s perspective…
“Oh my God are you KIDDING me?”
“What?”
“Steve just did The Move!”
“What move?”
“THE Move! You know.” Gareth presses together his palms, one slightly higher so he can curl his fingers over the ones on his opposite hand. He affects a bright, breathy voice and coos: “Hee hee oh wow your hands are soooo small compared to mine. Hee hee hoo my hands are so big and strong just like me, I could do a billion push ups, probably, and ohhhh wow! Now we’re holding hands! How did that happen! Hee hee hoo hoo ha ha ha!”
Francis chuckles knowingly. “Total Hot Guy Move.”
“A classic!”
“Is that what you think Steve Harrington sounds like?” Jeff asks.
As if on cue, Steve shifts his hand so his fingers fill the spaces between Eddie’s, and then those fingers are folding over, and then the two of them are just…holding hands, in the middle of the street. Staring at each other. Smiling.
Henderson seems just as fed up with this song and dance as the rest of them because he launches from his post in Steve’s back seat, halves himself over the center console and absolutely lays on the horn.
(That’s the other thing they don’t talk about, how clingy Dustin’s gotten. How he trails Eddie like a little shadow, like he’s been stitched to the sole of Eddie’s shoe. Like if he doesn’t have eyes on Eddie at all times he’s going to disappear.)
It snaps them out of their spell because then Steve is barking for him to, “quit it, this is a residential neighborhood!!!” and Henderson is punching out the tune to “Ride of the Valkyries” and Eddie is laughing, really laughing, his head thrown back and his eyes closed as he loses himself to a debilitating, full body cackle and for one brief, horrible moment Gareth thinks he might start crying.
Because there had been a time—Mayish, Juneish—when they didn’t know if they would get Eddie back. That part of him, the core of him, the writhing nucleus of his Eddie-ness, had been tamped down for good. And then Steve showed up. And then Steve kept showing up. And then slowly, surely, Eddie came back. Eddie’s here. Eddie’s late to band practice.
Gareth’s driveway has an incline so it takes Eddie a minute to reach them (Eddie’s working with a physical therapist to build up his quad strength Eddie’s missing sections of his internal organs Eddie almost died and he didn’t and they will never know how or why and Gareth swallows down another knot of emotion lodged at the base of his throat). When he’s at the top he bobs his chin at them and pumps his eyebrows, sheepish but unapologetic. He glances over his shoulder, flicks a salute at Henderson and Steve, beams when Steve answers with a fluttery trill of his fingers. He turns, moves to set up.
“Hey, Munson!”
Steve’s halfway in the car, forearm draped over the open driver’s side door, one foot propped on the seat. For a beat he doesn’t move, the corner of his lower lip pinched beneath the top row of his teeth. Then his tongue falls out of his mouth, he makes a little “Bleh!” noise like a B-movie vampire, and he throws the horns.
He does it wrong. He sticks his thumb out instead of tucking it beneath his middle and ring fingers. He isn’t saying rock on, he’s saying something else, cause Gareth knows a little ASL and in ASL that sign means—
Later Eddie will say his knee gave out, that he’s still figuring out how to maneuver his “busted ass body.” They let him have it, but Gareth and Jeff and Francis know the truth. Steve Harrington told Eddie Munson he loves him, and Eddie swooned.
“You fellas ready to rock?” Eddie asks as he hooks up to his amp.
Gareth gets behind his drum kit, counts them in, and the band plays on.
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Hopefully everyone's seen it by now thanks to plentiful kind Kirby bloggers, but yes, we've got "Sweet Dreams, Kirby" in English! I wasn't expecting character voices in these, as we haven't really had them before. And the narration (well, the UK narrator) does a great job sounding storybook sweet. But...
(Hope you don't mind me singling you out, @that-fanperson-meg !)
Yes, yes! I'm also incredibly fond of Ohmoto-san's Meta Knight voice in this! I always thought it was funny, when I first read this story, that Meta Knight brings Kirby this incredibly thick book to read (apparently, the artist was given specific instructions to make the book cartoonishly large!) in the middle of the night! (He seems so delightfully clueless. Don't read at night in the dark, Meta! Take care of your eyes!) But something about that soft voice made it so gentle!
And it's nice to see a different side of Meta Knight than we normally see. I like his Smash Bros. and elsewhere gruff style voice just fine, but I could happily get used to this, or a voice in this style! For one thing, it gives me a strong Takarazuka-vibe, which I love! But also... it fits my transmasc Meta Knight HC really well...!
As for the other characters’ voices, I wanted to say too, about Magolor, I've sometimes tried to picture in my head what his "accent" sounds like - if he were not speaking in Magolor-ese squeaky toy sounds like he does in game - and I really like Ohmoto-san's interpretation here!
Magolor doesn't talk like a parody or like a harmful caricature of someone with a "foreign accent." (Thank goodness!) He sounds like someone who, perhaps because he didn't grow up with whatever language he's using now, doesn't always know where the emphasis goes on certain syllables/phonemes. Like, if you listen closely, you can hear how he holds the “H” in Kirby (“KaH-BI-”) slightly longer and doesn’t let the sound drop off like the other characters, who say it like “Kah-BI-.” It’s also in the way he pronounces “Nee” and “Yo-.”
It fits beautifully with the idea that the lonely Magolor may have studied this language (and many others) on his own without a lot of native speakers to practice his pronunciation on. Thus, he's absolutely fluent in these languages, but he's lacking the immersion.
And I love Bandanna Waddle Dee too, oh gosh! You can just hear Bandee's enthusiasm and that try-hard (/pos) spirit that got them where they are today!
While I'd be happy if any of these characters got cast with their own voice actors later on (say... a new anime...plz?) I would also be really happy if there's just more opportunities for Ohmoto-san to voice them in little projects like this!
...Speaking of, I hope this series is doing well enough for them to continue it, and that we get word of another "It's Kirby Time" book soon!!
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I just wanted to add to the Remarried Empress convo by adding that there's like no way the child is even Sovishu's.... like he ruined everyone's lives for nothing. He truly is the worst!!
For real I wasn't about to just come out and say it but like the story itself showed us a flashback of Sovieshu eating a plate of cookies with abortion/infertility drugs and he thinks he's the father of Rashta's baby? Bro maybe the reason Navier isn't pregnant is because you're SHOOTING BLANKS DUDE
Bro but for real I was reading another manhwa yesterday and I found ANOTHER GUY worse than Sovieshu although this other guy is written in such an almost cartoonishly stupid and evil way that it's kind of just for the sake of plot at some point but, the man in question is the husband Stein from No More Turning A Blind Eye. My god this man speedran getting hard prison time like it was going for gold in the Olympics. A prideful narcissist who DESTROYS HIMSELF with how SEETHING he gets from his wife getting a divorce
Without huge spoilers, the transmigrated FL divorces him and he uh goes on a mission for revenge and blames everyone else in the mean time. If you want spoilers on how absolutely nuts he starts to go, read below
My god when I say this dude starts going off the rails. I would compare him to Mikhail from Father I Don't Want This Marriage because once the FL leaves him he begins a dark path of pure spite. But before the FL left him, before he even got a mistress, he treated his wife Ophelia like total absolute garbage. He causes his wife and the FL to start having body dysmorphia because he starts telling her she's eating too much and gaining weight, like, EVERY SINGLE NIGHT because he's essentially trying to scare her away from the dinner table to be alone with his mistress Ariel, who tbh the story never really explains how they met or why they fell in love unless im just way too stoned when I read these. The dude's a fucking loser too, he is only a count and he only gained that position from marrying Ophelia who is from a higher ranked very prestigious family, the Heavenwalker house. He basically mooches off her income
So like, here's a basic order of events. Dude starts not coming home, he brings his mistress in, at some point takes an extremely sentimental dress of the FLs and let's the mistress wear it, constantly berates and belittles FL, FL GETS HIS ASS BY WALKING IN WITH A DIVORCE ATTOURNEY WHILE HE'S STILL WITH THE MISTRESS, they have to take this to court, they set FL up where she hits Ariel by accident and Stein had reporters right outside the window to report OPHELIA HEAVENWALKER BEAT HER HUSBANDS MISTRESS CLEARLY SHE'S INSANE, he wins round one in court taking several of her businesses and like a large alimony payment, FL meets ML and Stein goes absolutely nuts accusing her of cheating, even showing up uninvited to a nobles party yelling and screaming and berating her in public, how she would just be an old hag without him, has to PHYSICALLY BE REMOVED FROM THE PROPERTY, immediately the next scene is him waking up in an alley from apparently getting blackout drunk, he begins a HUGE DOWNWARD SPIRAL onto alcoholism but Ariel is still extremely loyal to him BUT PSYCHE SHE BECOMES HIS NEW VICTIM, at one point he is literally screaming at her that she's useless and she ruined everything and how she's a parasite who needs to go make money and she even starts selling off her jrwelery he had gifted her to support him while he's drinking all their money away
Like. Genuinely cannot emphasize enough that he caused ALL of his own problems, never takes any accountability, AND HE COULDNT EVEN SUPPORT THE MISTRESS? I really kind of feel bad for her if she uh didn't turn out to be a sorceress who cursed the FL and tried to kill her (and successfully did pre-transmigration). After the divorce Ophelia is literally not having anything to do with him and he REPEATEDLY tries to fuck with her, at some point KIDNAPPING CHILDREN AND DUMPING THEM IN THE WOODS IN AN AREA FILLED WITH ANIMAL TRAPS and tells Ophelia when she is rightfully furious "chill it was just a prank, why are you even here to yell at me is it because you miss me :)", and THEN???? THEN???? THERE'S A SCENE WHERE HE LITERALLY BLUDGEONS THE FL IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD WITH A ROCK TO KNOCK HER OUT AND KIDNAP HER. A FUCKING ROCK.
Jesus. Like. After he got divorced and apparently became a jobless fucking loser, he got in bad debt with loan shsrks, and they wind up going to Ophelia all "aren't you worried about your former lovers safety?" And she just replies "if you want money go to his mom the marchioness, she'll pay you to keep quiet, I am not involved, leave me alone, I do not care" and when the loan sharks return to their hideout where Stein is all but hogtied and SNIVELLING LIKE A BITCH, the robbers mock him for Ophelia not giving a fuck and his legit reaction is HOW DARE OPHELIA DO THIS TO ME, HOW DARE SHE PUT ME IN DANGER and it's like NO DUDE THIS WAS ALL YOU, THE ENTIRE TIME, EVERY SINGLE MISTAKE
Actions, meet consequences. Just a cartoonishly idiotic man who im glad got punished. I really kind of wish Ariel had been given a second chance though :( she loved him right up until the end and winds up killing herself in her jail cell after being convicted of cursing Ophelia and murdering people (because yes she loved Stein so much she became a serial killer to rob people and resell their valuables)
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multiple people are typing...
here's Neepin's debut comic in full, brought to you by my lovely patrons! she's a new character I've been having a lot of fun drawing and daydreaming about. She's got a longer story in the works but why not make this silly short out of playing with facial expressions in the meantime. depicting conversations with people online is an interesting challenge I plan to explore more for sure.
Source link goes to a patreon post talking more about how I made it if you're curious! also here's a bonus drawing that didn't fit:
Image Descriptions are beneath the cut as well as in the alt-text because I don't trust the new tumblr editor! People using screen readers, feel free to comment about if this style of captioning comics works for you or doesn't.
[ID: PAGE 1: Largely black and white comics page titled “multiple people are typing…”, with small touches of orange and yellow throughout. Neepin, a fat woman with a bleached stripe of tousled hair framing her face, reclines in bed scowling at her laptop. Above her head are vague orange suggestions of people chatting online together.
We focus on her face shifting from skepticism to disgust to dark amusement over a yellow stripe, as her hands float beneath, typing furiously.
PAGE 2: Neepin's eyes bug out cartoonishly and her hair flies back with the force of the garbage she's reading on the server.
She glares stonefaced at her laptop screen in a long moment of silence, calculating. Then she leans forward, smiling grimly, and types "HEY BRO?? can you do me a FAVOR and explain what you think 'virtue signalling' means for me real quick?"
PAGE 3: Neepin nods cheerfully, "mmhm......................mmhmm...." with her eyes big and her mouth stretched wide. "GREEAAT fantastic" she intones, leaning forward smiling with eyebrows raised and a dead-eyed grin that transform her face into a million wrinkles.
In a warm orange panel glowing in the light from her laptop, she presses enter with a goofy BOOP! sound effect. She looks very round and cute and satisfied, her eyes cartoony and bright with big lashes. Text beneath reads in cursive, "SPLATTERHOUSE MIKE has been kicked from the server."
Bonus drawing: A scribbly Neepin sits reading a conversation on her laptop with her arms folded and a smirk on her face. The caption reads, "watching friend go to town on this guy"]
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You had any dreams lately?
OH BOY HAVE I
i think i actually posted about this one already but not too long ago i had a dream that i was in a competition where i had to balance baby sheep on a fence and it was like super stressful for some reason perhaps the competition was life or death i don’t remember
this maybe sounds concerning but most of the dreams i remember are nightmares and i have like super vivid nightmares with really complex stories and it’s almost kinda fun bc i wake up and i’m like damn bro i should write that down and use it as a story. scary in the moment sure but fun when i wake up. ONTO THE NIGHTMARES
-this one where i was in a field of dead grass that was really orange and there was a rusty metal pole at the top of a hill in the grass and when i went up to touch the pole it transported me to a dark house where everything was really long? idk how to explain it but shit was LONG. it was hard to move in the house. anyway i think somebody was trying to murder me so i had to like make sure they didn’t find out about the orange field. for some reason?? and then suddenly i was back in the field and the trees were really scary
-this one where i was at a county fair and found a puddle in the grass so naturally i dived into the puddle and the puddle led to this super elaborate underwater palace thingy with tile walls but then a shark swims in and it’s mouth is like full of flesh and blood so i’m like aw shit bro
-one where i had this ballpoint pen that the government(?) was looking for so i was like walking around my neighborhood at midnight knocking and doors trying to find someone who would hide me and the pen all while the government was chasing me down
-OH this super realistic one where i got out of bed and walked downstairs and saw this freaky wolf like thing sitting in the room and looking at me and it was like as tall as the ceiling. now that i think about it there’s a chance i like actually did get out of bed and hallucinated it but perhaps not maybe i just dreamed the getting out of bed part too
-oh man this one isn’t a nightmare but i’ve only had a dream with fictional characters in it once in my life and it was the atla/lok and let me tell u this was the most detailed weird ass dream i’ve ever had in my life. if u desire 2 know i will tell u but it’s like for real a good 3 paragraphs of nonsense. this one wasn’t even recent but still
-also not a nightmare i had a dream i was a prop in a travel ad and they put me in a giant slingshot and slungshot me and i sailed across the world but like cartoonishly and through space and stuff with like block letters signifying what part of the world i was flying over
-as for boring normal ass dreams: i very frequently get stress dreams about forgetting to study for tests LMAOOOO sorry for being a nerd
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Newt and Hermann, peace?
INT. LOCCENT - DAY
The war clock: DEACTIVATED.
GOTTLIEB squeezes and 'excuse me's' his way through the crowd. The crowd looks lively. He, on the other hand, looks nauseous.
NEWT jabbers on to some technicians.
Gottlieb is almost towards the exit.
Turning away from his audience, Newt glances around.
NEWT: Hey, where's Hermann?
Finally, Newt spots Gottlieb dragging himself out of LOCCENT. Newt frowns. Then a solemn realisation dawns upon him, and he starts to shove his way out. The technicians glance at each other: I've never seen him look like that before.
INT. SHATTERDOME CORRIDOR - DAY
Newt finds Gottlieb supporting himself against a wall.
NEWT: Hey, Hermann, you ok? You look like you're gonna puke.
GOTTLIEB: You can't tell me you don't feel the same.
Newt hesitates-then gives in and slowly deflates.
NEWT: No, yeah, I can't.
He leans against the wall.
GOTTLIEB: Newt. We've made the situation worse.
Newt slowly slides down to the floor.
INT. SHATTERDOME CAFETERIA - NIGHT
Everyone here looks relieved and more relaxed than they have been in a long time. They're feasting; smiling and chatting; napping, in the case of some who accidentally fell asleep.
Everyone looks relaxed, except the two k-scientists.
Newt and Gottlieb sit across each other at a table. Although Newt has two trays of food for himself, he's only picking at the dishes. He's more focused on Gottlieb instead, who's staring at his own tray, frozen and dazed.
NEWT: Hermann? Earth to Hermann.
To try to get Gottlieb's attention, Newt steals a piece of food from his tray. No response. So Newt eats the piece. Still nothing.
Some shatterdome workers move past their table, glancing at Gottlieb.
SHATTERDOME WORKER #1: What's up with him? We won.
The world around Gottlieb is all doubled like an anaglyph 3D image.
To make it worse, images of the Anteverse are superimposing onto his food: churning seas of bioslurry, a spawning pool, unborn kaiju writhing in their sacs.
Gottlieb shuts his eyes.
NEWT: You get used to it.
He gets a look from Gottlieb.
NEWT (cont'd): Sorta.
Gottlieb sighs.
GOTTLIEB: This is hardly a 'peacetime' we're in. But nobody else knows that except us. You did hear it, right? The Precursor?
NEWT: Uh, no way I couldn't.
SHATTERDOME WORKER #2 (O.S.): Man, I can't wait to go home!
NEWT: Neither can we.
Gottlieb reacts. Newt jerks back, like he's been snapped out of a daze.
GOTTLIEB: You spoke for them.
NEWT: What? No! I didn't! I actually do want to go home…
GOTTLIEB: And so do they.
Realisation dawns on Newt.
NEWT: So that's why they seem so familiar.
FLASHBACK: A Precursor's face. From a distance, its eyes appear insect-like. But zooming into one of them, it becomes more like a human's…
INT. HEADSPACE
Newt and Gottlieb find themselves in a dark, foggy, dimensionless place, directly facing a PRECURSOR. It looms over them. The scientists crane their necks. Their jaws drop.
NEWT: It's you.
GOTTLIEB: The one we've been hearing.
The scientists wait, but the Precursor doesn't respond. Newt and Gottlieb look at each other.
GOTTLIEB: What do we-?
NEWT: I don't know.
The pair quickly return their gazes to the Precursor, anticipating.
EXT. KARLA'S HOUSE - DAY (FLASHBACK)
The main door opens. Behind it, Gottlieb's sister KARLA, wearing a paper domino mask and holding the hand of a small BOY, also wearing a mask. Karla's mask cartoonishly resembles an aquatic insect.
KARLA: Servus, Brüderchen. (subtitles: Hey, baby bro.)
GOTTLIEB (in German, subtitled): Please stop calling me that.
Karla grins mischievously.
KARLA: OK, Mändl.
She pulls the insect mask up and onto her head.
INT. HEADSPACE
A layer on the Precursor's face opens up, revealing a set of beady alien eyes. Gottlieb stares at it.
GOTTLIEB: What do you want from me?
EXT. ANTEVERSE - NIGHT
Gottlieb and Newt find themselves standing atop a cracked platform of bone. Around them, more bone platforms and paths, all cracked or simply obliterated into pieces.
Multiple Precursor corpses float about, with one drifting past Gottlieb and Newt. They turn to look at it. It's a horrifying sight:
Half a human face. The other half is the alien half-which they now know is a faceplate.
NEWT: So all of you are human. I knew it.
PRECURSOR (in German, subtitled): How have you been, Dr Gottlieb? It's been a long time.
The Precursor waits, but Gottlieb can't work up the courage to speak. Newt looks between the two of them, baffled.
NEWT: Wait, what?
The Precursor ignores Newt.
PRECURSOR (in German, subtitled): You must really love destroying homes, seeing as you did it again.
Gottlieb is still too scared to speak, so Newt does it for him:
NEWT: Hermann just drifted today. What do you mean, 'a long time'? And what do you mean by 'again'?
Continuing to ignore Newt, the Precursor stares down at Gottlieb.
Under the Precursor's intense attention, Gottlieb sees his own neurons short circuiting and tearing apart. This soon fills the whole screen.
Multiple streams of thoughts-all the Precursor's-bombard him, all mixing together in a whirlwind of noise. He squeezes his hands over his ears. Only a few words and phrases here and there can be made out, but the last two sentences are clear:
PRECURSOR (V.O.): Your end is coming. I'll make sure of it myself.
Gottlieb's vision starts to fade.
NEWT: Hey! I'm here too!
Gottlieb looks at Newt, distraught, but is too overwhelmed to do anything.
NEWT (cont'd): Tell me what you want, you jerk! You want a truce? Let's make one!
GOTTLIEB: Newt...
The Precursor and Newt stare each other down, both without a sign of fear. That's the last thing Gottlieb sees before blacking out.
INT. SHATTERDOME MEDICAL BAY - NIGHT
Gottlieb slowly comes to. As he sits up, he groans, then turns to one side and retches.
A bin is already waiting there.
Gottlieb grabs his handkerchief, wipes his mouth, and notices a bin on his other side.
A snicker.
NEWT: I told the nurses to put one on each side.
Gottlieb frowns at Newt, who's in the bed next to his. Newt looks terrible-even worse than Gottlieb does, and even worse than after his first-ever drift.
GOTTLIEB: Newt. What did you do?
Newt trembles. He tries to stop it. Hide it.
NEWT: Oh, well, you know. I managed to get humanity some more time. So you can go home and have that peace and quiet you wanted for a while. You're welcome.
GOTTLIEB: My God.
NEWT: But you better come back quick. Because we'll probably need some math done and I can't be bothered to do all of it. I'm gonna be so bored. So bored, to-
He coughs out a laugh and trembles harder. Gottlieb observes him, thinking. Then he huffs. Newt scowls.
NEWT: Hey! What was that noise for, huh? Why don't you-
GOTTLIEB: I'm not leaving.
Newt's anger dissipates.
NEWT: Huh?
GOTTLIEB: Not yet, anyway. You helped me, so it's only right that I help you in return.
NEWT: Oh. That sounds like a thank you, so, no problem. Anytime.
A moment of quiet. Gottlieb considers what to say.
GOTTLIEB: Newt.
Newt looks at Gottlieb, tearful and shaking.
GOTTLIEB (cont'd): We thwarted the Precursors' plans once. We can do it again. We will do it again.
Newt pauses, surprised at Gottlieb's confidence. Then he laughs. It sounds a bit like a sob too, but it's mostly a laugh.
NEWT: Yeah. Yeah.
His trembling slowly starts to fade away.
NEWT (cont'd): We'll figure this thing out. Looks like K-Science is back in business.
Newt smiles and sticks his hand out for Gottlieb to fistbump. Unable to stop himself smiling too, Gottlieb does it.
Then Gottlieb spots something that makes his smile quickly fade: there's a large blood stain on Newt's top.
Another drop of blood falls and lands on the fabric.
Then another.
The drops blooming across to merge with each other, the stain now almost makes it seem like Newt has been stabbed in the chest.
With blood dripping from his nose, Newt looks at Gottlieb, his tremors now returned.
END.
Notes: Many ideas of what the Anteverse is like, ideas of images of it being superimposed, and seeing your neurons becoming damaged while a Precursor was focusing on you were taken from Pacific Rim: The Official Movie Novelization. It also heavily influenced the Precursor's personality and dialogue.
#alhamdulillah it's dooonee!!#thanks for the request and for being patient anoni!#i know this took a VERY long time#it was difficult figuring out how to write the precursor and i'm still a bit hgrjfdbsv idk if it worked#you can let me know what you think :)#sadly i'm not sure if i'll get to your other prompt but i've still left it in my inbox#if i wanna write maelstrom then i feel like i should figure out what to do with hannibal :)#Pacific Rim: Maelstrom#Pacific Rim#Newt Geiszler#my writing#Hermann Gottlieb#screenwriting#Christian-Latte-Anon
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The Wire Season 2, E6 - E9
Spoilers abound.
I still don't understand why people say that Season 2 is the worst season. It's a tragedy that it's most likely that people say it's the worst season simply because they can't engage with the fact that the primary focus isn't the Barksdale organization.
But The Wire is a smart show. It always has been, and it always will be. This is just part of a traditional rise and fall story structure, where we see the Barksdale crew fall a bit. We also get to see the machination bro - the mechanical gears spinning, the nuts and bolts - of Stringer Bell's lies and manipulation. It's completely in his character to care about the business more than the "game" and he's 100% right. Hilarity ensues when Avon, still calling the shots from inside, foils him at every step of the way. Another interesting development in this stretch of episodes is Bodie's growth. I think this is where he becomes a fan favorite for many. We know from Season 1 that Bodie is trying to make it to the other side of the chess board - to become "kingpin" and he shows us why he's a "smart ass pawn" here. He displays leadership and responsibility at HIS span of control - he is the lord of the low level street dealings. And even though he has his missteps, one blunder that costs the life of an innocent 9 year old boy - he's still wise enough to get out of the trouble that befalls him. This is also the "every piece matters" part of The Wire on display here - Avon gets locked up - main stash is seized - Barksdale crew struggles for market share - aggressions mount on the street - and these seemingly external forces result in an innocent victim.
But damn if the dock situation isn't engrossing in and of itself. Now, I must say that the show kind of speedruns the wire a bit in this season. But that's BECAUSE they slow-walked the dog on getting the wire in Season 1 that now they're ABLE to cut corners and take some liberties on getting the wire to spare us going through it a second time. They also cut out all the "codes" and systems for the police to crack, and the artistic license they use for that, hilariously enough, is that the white guys are dumber criminals than the black guys.
To wrap this up, I want to return back to a point I made earlier in these posts about The Wire being a horror show at times. It's just so damn bleak and dark, the business with the FBI agent being compromised is bleak, and Valchek being such a useless fuck that he actually dismisses what should constitute good police work over a petty rivalry is also bleak. Both of these things almost actually border the line of being cartoonishly evil - but I know that corruption totally exists so maybe not. But as far as the show is concerned, both of these characters feel like they're there to impede the progress of our protagonists in a way. Not holding it against the show per se, it is what it is.
3 more episodes to close out Season 2. Here we go.
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RRR (2022)
10 out of fucking 10
holy fucking shit balls
did i fucking love this movie? 🤔
fuck it; don't care
shit was great
a-freaking-mazing, even
holy fuck balls
i need more of this
now
put it in my fucking veins
so yeah
shit was pretty fucking good
a bloody rollercoaster of an experience, let's say
thank-fucking-you Jacob Geller for having that void of a beard in the first video i saw of yours
led to the timeline where I actually watched a Tollywood/Bollywood film (finally)
is this what missa been missin'?
my whole life?
or is this simply one of the greats?
mah ass gon' find out, i know that 👍🏿
played the (thank god it's stereotypically so) dance scenes a second time each time just to read the lyrics
watching the last one for a 3rd time while i type this >.>
y'all, this some pumped up shit
o'mah'god
wanted to fucking dance, this shit go so hard
glad i played Raji: An Ancient Epic already
wouldn't have understood the matter with the bow
well, i guess i only barely understand it; let's be honest
[i'm now watching the Desi Naach (nacho) dance for the 3rd time]
Naaacho nacho nacho nacho nacho nacho vidi naaacho!~
mofos did a great job with these dance scenes
and i appreciate seeing that one thick lady during the Desi Naach
so much plot happening in that scene; fo'real
love it
shit's like a spiritual/religious/praise scene in a Madea play... but fuckin' LIT!
they totally had a stand, btw
part of me is thinking we did something similar to the Nacho dance-off when we were kids, but the other part is like "nah, you wish, homie"
real talk, y'all, don't let nobody spoil the shit that happens in this beautiful experience
back to the bros, though
that was some heartfelt shit portrayed throughout
don't remember the last time i saw something like it tbh 🤔
Akhtar reminded me of Angry Joe in a few scenes, which was interesting
watched Hindi dub with English subtitles
need to see it in Telugu, though >.>
zee5.com, here i come (subs or not)
ah, should talk about the cartoonishly evil Euros 💀
well done
they played those roles well
and that's all I'm gonna say about that :3
starting to wonder the significance of some of the actors, especially the Euros
like, surely some are really famous and fill seats by being on the poster
oh shit, and Malli can act; gawd damn
love how the ladies were getting their dresses dirty and not giving a fuck
shit looks too fun
Just remembered (upon the umpteenth replay of Desi Naach), the drumming gave me Turn Down for What vibes, so I'm wondering if India inspired the video at all 🤔 Could've been vice versa actually
yeah, i'm pretty sure i fucking love it
The Favorites List
The Intimate List
The Blind List (1/5)
The Get Off Your Couch List
The Romance List (bromance)
Ram has some serious Jason Momoa vibes going on at a certain point
this whole movie: Dude wanna bro; Ladies wanna have fun
it's a good thing nobody was wearing heals at that part o.o
Seriously, I need to stop playing Desi Naacho on repeat so I can go to sleep. (found it on YouTube; don't you dare!) :x
Holy shit, nobody gets sexualized at all
except for the Ram (Raju) & Akhtar (Bheem)
sweet
y'all, i just realized that 3 hours flew by like 2 while watching this
went in knowing nothing btw; highly recommend knowing very little
(Moderate Spoilers)
love the portrayal of real life superheros (basically)
like, what if Superman was Indian and just had an unreasonable amount of super-strength
that's these two mofos (with the combat skills of Batman and Green Arrow)
glad i didn't realize while watching that there wouldn't be a third guy; Ram played his villain role well, so the reveal was a nice twist for me
oh shit, Akhan pours liquid as bait twice in the movie
trust; nice
shit, the scratches on the back again... huh 🤔
i'mma need somebody to CinemaWins this with cultural and religious explanations
(Major Spoilers)
thank Radha both these beautiful fuckers lived 🥺
i like dark endings, but fuck dat noise damnit
so many bloody fakeouts; i hated it in the moment, but i loved it after
real talk, though; Ram is handsomer, but Akhtar looks better with his shirt off
#Thoughts#RRR#2022#i fucking love it#10/10#Top of 2022#Major Spoilers#The Favorites List#The Intimate List#The Blind List#Blind Rating: 1/5#The Get Off Your Couch List#The Romance List#The Versions List#Netflix#Watched: January 2023#hype
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More Mario AU details and headcanons.
Just more random stuff related to my alternate universe, so I will mention Ocs, and some things might be a little weird. Some are geography related, but I'll have individual character ones too.
GEOGRAPHY HEADCANONS
The Mushroom kingdom, Bean bean kingdom, and modern day Hyrule are technically separate land masses, but are close enough to be connected by some of the largest bridges in the world. Though there is a smaller stony and crystal island between the Mushroom kingdom and Bean bean kingdom that's treated as the "border" so to speak.
The Koopa kingdom is also pretty close, but not close enough to build a bridge. During Bowser's weird kidnapping days, he'd sometimes set up temporary "main" fortresses on temporary volcanic islands created by his and Kamek's magic.
South of the Mushroom kingdom mainland is Isle Delfino, and further south of that is the Rainbow isle, where Rainbosaurs like Yoshi originally come from.
Diamond city is on a smaller island neighboring the Metro kingdom.
The DK isles are actually a group of islands with different ecosystems connected by tropical beach areas in between them all. The center jungle island the Kongs live on is called Congo Bongo, and the Kremling King K Rool has taken up the spooky swamp island, and hopes to conquer the others.
The Empire of Sarassaland is actually on one of the biggest continents in the world, made up of 8 kingdoms. It's the only remaing empire in the world.
Wart's kingdom is located in the clouds, and kind of drifts around freely. He once took over the Pastel lands where Birdetta and other Palettesaurs come from, but after Mario and co defeated Wart, the Palettesaurs liberated their lands from his army.
CHARACTER HEADCANONS
The Kongs use special music related magic to fuel their strength and agility. Each kong uses a different instrument that relates to their style and personality, and the magic becomes much stronger when they play their instruments in harmony.
Of course, the Magical banana hoard also plays a role in their strength... Though the Magical bananas are used as the main ingredient of Cranky Kong's potions, or sold to restaurants in the Metro kingdom so the Kongs can participate in trade and economics.
These magic banana restaurants are somewhat popular, and may be why Metro kingdom residents have become so tall over the years.
The Kongs and Kremlings were once on opposite sides of a great war... Though the Kongs did win, their numbers have dwindled, which is why K. Rool keeps trying to take them over.
K Rool isn't actually a king, but as the only surviving general of the Kremling army, no one questioned him when he decided to declare himself one.
K Rool wants the bananas so he can make magic fueled super weapons.
Bowser may kidnap Peach from time to time, but he's actually pretty diplomatic and a fair king despite his great pride, so he hates tyrants like Wart, K Rool, or King Boo.
King boo cries victim, but his real reason for hating the Mario bros is because they were the first to survive his ghost house, and King boo is frustrated because his army relies on luring foolish mortals into his house in order for them to die and join his ranks.
Ramona rightfully hates King boo because of what he did to her... but she has gotten the hang of standing up against his creepy advances, especially with the help of her own loyal following of Boos.
Good boos look like the classic in game boos, and they are loyal to Ramona. Dark evil boos have darkened faces and violet eyes, and of course are loyal to king boo.
Dry Boss (dry bowser) is the skeleton of a dragon koopa reanimated by King boo to be his second in command. Similar to boos, Dry bones who are loyal to these villains are darker and more sinister looking.
Bob-ombs are a combination of magic and technology, and after they explode, they will regenerate over time. Bigger bob-ombs contain more magic and explode with a wider radius... at the cost of taking longer to regenerate.
King Bob-omb is considered a king by other bob-ombs not because he rules a kingdom, but because he is the biggest and most powerful of them, and has the ability to change his size to alter his blast radius. Such power is considered "Kingly" for bob-ombs.
Captain Syrup oddly enough, favors ice magic in my AU. Aside from being able to create swords of ice, she also lacks temperature sensitivity because her magic keeps her regulated. She could just as easily bundle up in a volcanic area or go sunbathing on an iceberg if she wanted to.
My OC Blitz actually doesn't habe a true magic alignment... but he has used the super ball flower E. Gadd created quite a bit, and his body has become rather cartoonishly stretchy and flexible as a result.
While most of the time Mario or a group are responsible for the heroics, the Sunshine and Oddysee events are the only times in the AU my OC Fritz ends up being the hero in the end.
The oddysee events are the last time Bowser engages in his weird kidnapping shenagins. Afterwards he's a full on ally in thwarting enemies like King boo, Wart, or K Rool.
I probably trailed on too long, sorry ^^;
#super mario bros#super mario#mario#mario au#super mario au#bowser#king boo#donkey kong#king k rool#king wart#yoshi#birdetta#birdo#mushroom kingdom#mario oc#super mario bros au#super mario oc#mario sunshine#mario oddesy
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Entry 7: The Hardest Choice
Chapter 6: The Path Is Yours
We rush into the battlefield from the future vision prologue and find Xander and Ryoma dueling. Xander, after making sure Corrin is okay, announces that Nohr is invading Hoshido to show off their strength. He points out that ending things quickly will prevent unnecessary bloodshed, which is a fair point. But, you know what else would prevent unnecessary bloodshed? Not invading Hoshido.
The two families argue over ownership of Corrin and she is forced to choose a side. Stand with her genetic family and fight to defend Hoshido from violent invaders, or stand with her adoptive family and invade a neighboring country, slaughtering countless civilians in the process. Or play the DLC route. Or go play Super Smash Bros.
And I mean, is this even a choice? Nohr is evil. Like, insanely evil. Ten minutes ago they blew up a marketplace and killed dozens of children. They’re invading Hoshido for shits and giggles and we’re supposed to side with them? Corrin’s supposed to be a good person, why the fuck would she ever join Nohr’s army?
And it’s not like Corrin has any love for Nohr as a country. She spent fifteen years in prison, she doesn’t know the people. Hell, she hates how Nohr looks and feels. Garon murdered her parents, kidnapped her, held her captive, and tried to murder her. Twice.
There is only one reason to join Nohr: love for Xander, Camila, Leo, and Elise. And that’s a relatable reason, standing by your family even if they’re evil. But, it feels cowardly to kill innocent people just because you don’t want to fight your family.
No, not cowardly. Evil. This is a choice between good and evil, with both sides holding up signs saying which they are. And that’s part of the problem with this game. Nohr is so ridiculously evil and Hoshido is so ridiculously good. At this point, we have seen no justification for any evil Nohr does. They’re evil for the point of evil. And even when Hoshido does shady things, like kidnapping Azura or having a mind control barrier, the game glosses over it to avoid having the good guys be morally grey. And let’s be honest, it’s kinda infuriating that Intelligent Systems, a Japanese company, made a game where the most explicitly Japanese kingdom in the franchise is pure good and the European kingdom is cartoonishly evil.
This game tries to paint this as a choice between two families, and that doesn’t work. Painting it as a choice between two families lessens the impact of siding with Nohr to protect your family. Plus, again, the Hoshidans are strangers. Hoshido is not Corrin’s home and the Hoshidan royals are not her family. The only one who was given enough screen time to feel like family was Mikoto, and she’s dead. Maybe it’s a cultural thing, but I really don’t give a shit about Corrin’s blood. I’m not choosing Birthright because I want Corrin to claim her Birthright, I’m choosing it because Nohr is cartoonishly evil.
And here’s the kicker, the ultimate reason to choose Hoshido: Garon tried to murder Corrin. Twice. First with Hans at the bridge, then again with the bomb at the plaza. Choosing Nohr is suicidally stupid. I know Corrin’s naive, but this is just idiotic.
And Corrin doesn’t even bring this up. She doesn’t shout to Xander, “Hans attempted to murder me as we were fleeing the Bottomless Canyon, apparently working under orders from King Garon. I do not feel safe returning to Nohr.”
No, she doesn’t explain jack shit. She lets Xander think she’s betraying him, when in reality she’s just doing the right thing. Corrin is an imbecile and it makes this game painfully dumb.
Birthright Chapter 6: In The White Light
We chose Hoshido. Right away, the chapter title screen changes, going from the mix of white lilies and black roses from earlier chapters to just white lilies. The text boxes also get a new blueish tint. Corrin tells Xander to withdraw his troops and that she’s siding with Hoshido.
Xander says that Corrin must be brainwashed. He reveals that he’s known all along that Garon kidnapped Corrin as a child. Something that he kept from Corrin, because he’s a great older brother. He tells Corrin that they are family, regardless of blood, and that Garon will forgive her. The first one of those is true, but the other is laughable. Has he ever met Garon?
Corrin tells Xander about Garon blowing up the plaza, killing dozens of innocent people, and endangering her life. Corrin calls Garon evil and Xander, apparently ignoring the whole mass murder thing, gets pissed. Corrin asks him to join her and Xander attacks her. Prick.
Side note, the music in this scene is fantastic. It reminds me of the Midmire theme from Awakening and really feels hopeless. Xander beats the shit out of Corrin and Ryoma runs in to save her. The two princes duel, and the battle begins. Also, Jakob shows up.
Ryoma, Hinoka, and Tamuki join Corrin as the two families battle. Interestingly, those three are listed as being part of a different army on the bottom screen, implying that they won’t be around after this battle.
Ryoma
The crown prince of Hoshido. A swordmaster with impeccable strength, skill, and speed. His personal skill, Bushido, makes him fight better when supported by low level units, fitting his honorable Samurai aesthetic. His armor looks cool, but he has crazy, Raditz length hair and this weird horned crown that I dislike. He carries this cool lightning katana called Ranjito. Personality wise, he seems a bit dull. He’s a loyal, protective prince, but at first glance there isn’t much more there.
Hinoka
Corrin’s older sister and a Sky Knight. Her personal skill buffs damage of nearby allies. I kinda like her tomboy haircut and lack of a ridiculously big bust, she looks more like a normal person than most Fates characters. She seems really protective of Corrin and her homeland. Also, I kinda hate her voice.
Takumi
Corrin’s brother, an archer. Who is a prick. A massive prick. He has a massive attack stat for an archer and wields a custom bow that shoots arrows made of light. His design isn’t too interesting, aside from the ponytail that looks weird because it’s cut off by the edge of the screen in his portrait. Personality wise, Takumi is a prick. He’s the best written character in the game, from what I remember. But he’s still a prick.
Also, I suppose I should discuss the Nohrian royals now, because by the time I play Fates my perception will be clouded by the events of Birthright.
Xander
The honorable prince of Nohr. Our protector turned enemy. A Paladin reminiscent of Camus, Selena, and Mustafa from past games, willing to stand by his country even if it is evil. Stat wise, Xander is an absolute tank. His personal skill is called Chivalry, a parallel to Ryoma’s Bushido. It boosts him when fighting enemies with full health. I love Xander’s design, the black and purple with an ascot that makes him look both intimidating and regal, the small black cwon, and that face. He looks like a man tormented by his own actions. I love Xander’s personality, this honorable man who, when forced to choose between his family and his morals, chose the former. He’s actually a good parallel to Corrin, now that I think about it. That said, he is a bit dumb, and trying to kill Corrin was a dick move.
Camila
Ugh. Camila. She’s a new class called Malig Knight, basically a Wyvern Rider with magic abilities. Her personal skill boosts the damage done by allies. Her design...sigh...her design is very, very, very fanservicey, with massive titties and exposed cleavage. Camila is a fanservice character, which is a trend in Fire Emblem that I’m not fond of. Personality wise she’s...creepily obsessed with Corrin, to the point of being kinda incestuous. Ugh. Camila was this game’s breakout character and that’s really disappointing, because she’s probably the worst of the royals in my opinion.
Leo
Leo’s a Dark Knight with a personal skill called Pragmatic that boosts damage against already injured foes. I like how his armor looks; the collar is a bit much, but it’s kinda charming. Also, he looks like he’s Xander’s brother, which is something that they forgot to do with the rest of the royals. Personality wise, he seems to be the only character in this family that isn’t a gigantic moron, which is refreshing. The trick with faking Kaze and Rinkah’s deaths was nefarious, but kind, which is a trait I like in a character.
Elise
The other moe healer little sister, now on horseback. Her personal skill reduces damage done to nearby allies. Design wise, she looks adorable. So adorable that she should not be a soldier and should not have children. I do like the pigtails, although it is weird that they’re both purple and blonde. She’s a bit more forceful in her personality than Sakura, which is good. She’s cute but not boring.
The battle, if you can even call it that, was basically just a quick fight between Ryoma and Xander. After the Nohrians retreat without saying anything, Corrin swears to stand with Hoshido, even though it's the hardest choice she’s ever made. Even though, as we’ve discussed, it isn’t a hard choice at all.
Also, the intro plays again. Nothing is different this time, but it does play again. After that pointless interruption, Lilith shows up again. Remember Lilith? She was important a few chapters ago. And then wasn’t mentioned again until this moment. Lilith takes us into the Astral Plane, introducing us to a new mechanic: My Castle. Which we will get into, next time.
#fire emblem#fire emblem fates#fe 14#corrin fe#xander fe#ryoma fe#takumi fe#hinoka fe#camilla fe#elise fe#leo fe#fire emblem 14#fire emblem birthright
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For the request thing Dirk and Roxy in some supernatural AU if you feeling it! Congrats on the follower count, too, dude!
this took FOREVER to finish simply bc I had Too Many ideas, but I’m super happy with how this turned out
—-
“You know, there’s no evidence that ghosts are real.”
“Mhm.”
“Sure, there’s- fuck,” Dirk paused to avoid tripping over a root cutting across his path before continuing, “There’s plenty of folklore. Anecdotal accounts. But there’s nothing scientific to back it up. If ghosts were real, wouldn’t scientists have caught one to test on yet?”
“That doesn’t sound very humane, though.” Roxy countered, shining their flashlight on another root so Dirk wouldn’t trip. “Testin’ on them, I mean! They’re still people. Shouldn’t they have the same rights and stuff?”
“They’re ghosts. It’s not like they’re going to die again.”
“How do you know? Maybe that’s what we’re testing them for!” Roxy flashed the beam of light onto Dirk’s face briefly, laughing a little when he made a face at them. “Look, would you want a bunch of scientists pokin’ around at your ghost when you die?”
“First of all, when I die, I’m going to be cold, unconscious, and rotting. Or hot, unconscious, and dusty if I get cremated. Either way, I’m not going to be a ghost. But-” He added when he saw Roxy’s silhouette gear up to speak, “If I was a ghost, I would be happy to let scientists do whatever the fuck they want. Test the hell out of my incorporeal form. Go hogwild in the name of science. I don’t give a shit.”
Roxy hummed and shrugged. “I mean, yeah, mood. There’s still gotta be consent forms and shit, though. I’m the one that works in a lab that involves people here. I know my shit.”
“That still doesn’t change my point though.”
“Which was…?”
“That ghosts aren’t real.”
“Ah. Yeah.” Roxy glanced down at the map on their phone, making sure the two of them were still headed in the right direction. “Yeah, they probably aren’t.”
“Then why the fuck are we exploring a haunted house?”
“Because it’s fun, dummy. Get in the spirit of the season! Eat some pumpkins! Wear a sweater! Fuck a ghost!”
“The spirit of the season.” Dirk’s voice was flat as he tried to think of a joke to make off of the obvious pun there before the rest of what Roxy said caught up to him. “Please tell me there won’t be any ghost fucking involved here. I mean, had I known that, I would’ve at least brought a condom. Worn something nice. Put on some cologne.”
“As if.” Roxy laughed. “Do you own any cologne? Axe does not count.”
“No comment.”
“You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were nervous, Di Stri.” Roxy teased, giving him a side eye. Dirk’s expression was carefully neutral.
“Good thing you know better. Do I look nervous to you? The answer is hell no. I’m cool as a cucumber riding a private jet ski into the sunset. I don’t get nervous.” His mouth twitched at Roxy’s failure to contain a snort. “No, I’m just not looking forward to freezing my ass off a mile away from where we parked the car in a shitty abandoned building that’s going to give me mesothelioma. Do you want to be the one asking for financial compensation when I get mesothelioma? I don’t think so.”
“You’re such a big baby.” Roxy muttered, laughing softly. “I think we’re here.”
They stepped out into a clearing and shined their flashlights on the decaying building in front of him. It looked so cartoonishly like a haunted house that Dirk almost wanted to laugh. He shivered instead, hugging his jacket tighter around himself. Roxy bounced on their heels beside him and all but bounded up to the crumbling porch. It took some maneuvering to get up the stairs without falling through wood that had seen better days, but it seemed that all of a sudden that they were both staring down the door handle.
“Do you want to do the honors?” Roxy asked. Dirk almost protested that this wasn’t his idea, why should he do the honors, but there was a telltale waver of anxiety finally catching up to them in Roxy’s voice, so he bit it back. The metal of the handle was cold to the touch, and hinges creaked dramatically when he pulled it open. Dirk did a little flourish with his flashlight and pretending to bow, hoping the humor would sooth Roxy’s nerves.
“After you.” He said. Roxy giggled a little.
“Oh, wow, such a gentleman. My prince.” They cooed, walking through the doorway. Dirk followed close behind. Yeah, he wasn’t looking forward to anything this haunted house had to offer, but like hell was he going to let Roxy out of his sight.
As soon as they were both inside, the door slammed shut behind them and their flashlights flickered out. Roxy let out a tiny “eep!” and Dirk tensed.
“Dirk?” Roxy called out into the pitch black.
“I’m right here.” They sounded close, and in a moment, he felt Roxy’s hand slip into his. He squeezed it gently.
“The flashlight batteries are brand new, they shouldn’t be going out like this…” Roxy mumbled, and Dirk heard a noise that sounded a lot like they were thwacking their flashlight on their thigh. “Aha!” The flashlight flickered back to life. After a few seconds of fumbling, Dirk managed to turn his back on too.
The room they illuminated was… surprisingly mundane, all things considered. A moth-eaten couch, a layer of dust thicker than the rug laying in the middle of the floor, peeling wallpaper that had seen better days. It kind of just looked like an abandoned house, nothing particularly out of the ordinary. The only thing that really set it apart was that-
“Jesus, it’s colder than Satan’s left nut in here.” Roxy said, shivering.
“You can say that again.”
“Jesus, it’s colder th-”
“Rox.” Dirk gave them a look, and Roxy giggled nervously again.
“Come on, let’s explore.” They said, tugging him in the direction of one of the doorways. It led them into a modest kitchen, similarly covered in a thick layer of dust. The cabinets were all empty except for one - also empty - box of Bisquick and a startled rat. Dirk most definitely did not shout in surprise when it squeaked at him, and Roxy didn’t laugh so hard they nearly cried, thank you very much.
The laundry room was also empty, and so was the office they poked their heads into, except for a piano that sat against the wall in surprisingly good condition. First floor exhausted, Roxy put a hand on their hip and grinned at Dirk, their confidence bolstered by the lack of spooky happenings beyond the door.
“Ready to go upstairs?”
“There’s no possible way saying ‘no’ will work, will it?”
“Dirk,” Roxy’s expression softened gently, “If you wanna leave, we can.”
“…Nah, I’m good.” Dirk bonked his shoulder against Roxy’s. “If we end up breaking our legs on an unstable set of stairs, though, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Roxy laughed. “You warned me about the stairs, bro.”
“I told you dog.” Dirk added emphatically. Roxy took the lead up the stairs, which creaked uncomfortably underneath them, but otherwise held steady. Atop the landing, only one door was open, albeit only slightly. They pushed it open and found themselves in a tidy bedroom. The bed was neatly made and covered with cobwebs, and the posters on the wall were too dusty and bleached with age to reveal what they originally were. Moonlight trickled in through the open window, painting the room an eerie blue.
The pair poked around curiously, though Dirk expected it to be just as barren as the rooms downstairs. He stepped closer to the wall to investigate the posters, and his blood ran cold.
“Uh, Roxy?” He called them over, taking a step back from the wall. There was something dripping from it.
“The fuck?” Roxy said at Dirk’s side. “Wait… is that slime?”
“If we get slimered, I’m going to be so fucking mad.” Of all the ways to die, that would definitely be pretty high on Dirk’s list of ‘dumbest ways to beef it.’ The goopy green slime started forming shapes on the wall.
6 6 6
“Oh, great.” Dirk said, trying to hold back the urge to bolt. “It’s a satanic Slimer.” Roxy frowned next to him, then looked around. They bounced over to the desk and Dirk gave them a bewildered look. “The fuck are you-”
“Aha!” Roxy withdrew a lonesome sharpie from one of the desk drawers and bounded back over to the dripping wall. Before Dirk could stop them, they drew their own dark shapes beside the numbers.
6 9 6 9 6 9
“You have got to be kidding me.” Dirk stared the wall, Roxy grinning at their handiwork. Another set of letters started appearing.
h a h a n i c e .
Roxy brightened even further and wheeled around to face Dirk. “What do you say? Ready to be paranormal investigators?”
Dirk glanced at where the slime was spelling out w h o y o u g o n n a c a and sighed. “I guess we’re the ghostbusters now. They are us.”
“Fuck yeah!” Roxy cheered.
f u c k y e a h !
#dirk strider#roxy lalonde#homestuck#john is the ghost but I'm not gonna tag him lmao#this was such a fun prompt!!!#I love supernatural aus#and it gave me an excuse to just squeeze as much Dirk And Roxy Are Best Friends into it as possible#my writing#okay to reblog#also thank you!!!!#I'm v happy#hootpoop12#asks
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Batman: Arkham Origins Blackgate
So, at this point, its a pretty cold take to say that Batman could address the crime related problems of Gotham City by funding development programs, education, and other social programs that would help "criminals" get on the right path. That Gotham Citys notorious Villains wouldn't even be motivated to be such huge and over the top personalities if it wasn't for the fact they had an equally huge personality with which to combat each others Narcissistic Personality Disorders against. That Gotham City, for all its faults, would be a better place without Batman ever having stepped foot in it, and that Batman is honestly just a little bit of a crypto fascist. Everyone's said it, or at least thought it, and everyone's pretty much in agreement that it's true to some extent or another.
Except DC, of course, who continue to make millions pushing Batman as the one true and only good savior of the ailing city. Who continues to make comic after comic showcasing the various villains become near caricatures of themselves as they get more and more cartoonishly evil to foil batmans plans, while bruce himself gets more and more wise to the point of being a near omnipotent God who has accounted for each and every possibility in the entire universe. This personification of the Dark Knight is very important to DC, and while they attempt to sometimes show Bruces "philanthropy" within the comics, they often somehow exacerbate just how much of a problem it is that Bruce and Waynecorp effectively own Gotham, and why the concept of The Batman is a problem in and of itself.
So it was pretty par for the course then that, for a short time between 2009 to 2015, DC Comics teamed up with Rocksteady Studios and Warner Brothers Montreal to create the Batman: Arkham video game series that featured the exact same crypto fash Bat that fans have come to know and love. The Arkham series was a western take on the popular Japenese game genre that we know today as "Character Action". It's a bit of a hard genre to describe, but its typically distinguishable by being a Third Person game in where your character takes on hordes of enemies and is very, very powerful right from the get go. Where you have combo meters that break on the slightest bit of damage and the combat revolves just as much around being stylish and impressive to look at, as it is engaging and outrageously difficult. From a gameplay perspective, DC and Rocksteady couldn't have picked a better superhero to go with when adapting the Character Action genre to the west. Batman has no powers, and relies entirely on his gadgets and martial arts training to effectively subdue those in front of him. This allowed the Arkham series to shine as a half Character Action, half Stealth Puzzle game, creating what was effectively a 3D Third Person Metroidvania Brawler. It was a match made in Heaven.
The end result of the Arkham Series popularity created an entire genre of combat and gameplay styles that have majorly impacted and outlived the Arkham series, with pretty much any super hero game afterwards being simply an Arkham game with a skin. It also meant that Warner Bros. Interactive Entertainment, the publisher, had an effective cash cow they could milk for everything it was worth. Immediately after the publication of the first game, Batman: Arkham Aslyum, production began on a second game titled Batman: Arkham City that was much larger in scope. Set to be an open world that took place in all of Gotham as the inmates of the Aslyum escaped and overtook the city. Batman: Arkham City was released in 2011 to absolute critical praise and from that point on, the Arkham Series of games was here to stay and here to become a franchise with yearly release Al-a Call of Duty. A mobile game came out the same year as the second game, and every year after following you had at least 2 games in the Arkham-verse release thereafter. Rocksteady, bless their overworked and creatively burnt out hearts, could not keep up with this demand while they developed a sequel to Arkham City that was meant to be even larger in scope. Warner Brothers instead then tapped an in-house development team, WB Games Montreal, for a prequel game that took place as the Batman was finding his footing and dealing with his first major crime outbreak.
This prequel came to be known as Batman: Arkham Origins and was released in 2013. It's widely considered by fans of the series to be the black sheep of the series. Having none of the original charm or excitement of the first games, as it was made to be a yearly entry into the series rather than with the care and attention that Rocksteady put into the previous two entries. Warner Brothers Interactive however were very, very sure that they wanted to put all their eggs in this new Arkham prequel themed basket and developed not just one, not just two, but three separate spin offs! These spinoffs were as follows:
- An iOS mobile fighting game that had the same name as the original game developed by the Mortal Kombat developers Netherrealm Studios(Fun fact: This is the 2nd iOS Arkham fighting game they had made at that point.)
-An animated direct to video sequel-to-the-prequel titled "Batman: Assault on Arkham" that ultimately bombed pretty hard.
-And finally the game I'll be writing about today, a Playstation Vita/Nintendo 3DS (And later PC/Xbox 360/Playstation 3 release with updated textures) side game that was also sequel-to-the-prequel known as Batman: Arkham Origins Blackgate.
Even reading this back in 2020, I cannot fathom why they had such confidence in this series as to fund this many projects in this specific prequel time period of the Arkham Universe. Needless to say, all of these were critical failures. But being one of the 6 people left in the world who still excitedly owns a Playstation Vita in 2020, I was goaded by the other 5 to give the final spin-off game a shot.
And so I did.
I want my 8 hours of life it took to complete it back.
Batman: Arkham Origins Blackgate is a 2.5D Metroidvania that tries really, really hard to be a mainline Arkham game despite being designed primarily as a Metroidvania. For those unaware, a metroidvania is a genre of game that features a large map with procedural upgrades that allow you to access more and more of the map, often requiring you to remember locations so that you can backtrack to them and try out new upgrades to see if they let you into these new areas. Blackgate follows this formula and does it very, very, very poorly.
You might be feeling a bit of confusion here, though, as earlier within this article I described the Arkham main line series as essentially a 3D Metroidvania style of games. And given this earlier comparison, when going into Blackgate I honestly expected this combination of an Arkham game that was more focused on being a Metroidvania to be really good! Metroidvanias are one of my favorite types of genres and I'm regrettably a fan of the Arkham games, so I was all set and ready to settle into what I was hoping would be a good game, or at least a decent one.
The issues with the genre this game has decided to cram itself awkwardly into are immediate and apparent the moment you boot the game. Being 2.5D, which in every other instance I've ever seen means "Plays exactly like a 2D game in every way, but is just done in 3d and thus uses 3D Models" Blackgate decides that sort of consistency is beneath it and constantly shifts its own perspective. Its never not a sidescrolling camera view, but its levels also have you make turns in L-Shaped corridors that mean your map screen is entirely useless. In Metroid: Zero Mission, for example, your map is a side on view of the chambers. It has long sections that go up and down in what is effectively the Y axis, and long corridors that go left and right in the X axis. This is how every single Metroidvania does its Map screen, including other 2.5D Metroidvanias I have played in the past. To do so otherwise would destroy any sense of understanding of verticality that exists within the game world. No Metroidvania ever "turns" in the middle of a corridor into another corridor that suddenly goes forwards and backwards on what would be the Z axis.
In Blackgate, however, your map screen is a top-down view of Arkham Aslyum that has corridors that go forwards and backwards, left and right, and does noting to denote any verticality in any of the areas. What this effectively means is that you're going to spend an annoying amount of time moving forward into a corridor and then hitting your map button to try and discern exactly where the hell you are in relation to the rest of the world. It doesn't help then that the facility of Arkham Aslyum is not traversed normally, as almost all doors and elevators and any set of stairs are non-existent and the ones that are there do not work or are not accessible. The Facility is in ruins due to the events of the game and that means you will constantly be working your way through crawlspaces and vents or even simply holes in the floor or cieling that allow you to progress around the map. Again, this betrays a core tenat of any Metroidvania, as backtracking to locations is a huge and important part of the core gameplay loop. Doing so in Blackgate is like pulling teeth trying to remember which vent took you where and what specific level of verticality you need to be on that takes you where you want to go.
The combat is copy/pasted directly from any other arkham game, where you magnetically snap between enemies and have a combo meter that is broken if you're hit as well as a parry system for incoming attacks. This system, in short, does not work in the slightest in a side scrolling perspective. Not only are enemies often grouped up in a way that makes keeping a combo impossible, but for some reason you are almost always unable to counter someone who is about to hit you if you're not directly facing them. Effectively this turns every fight into a chore where you are just trying to get through it as quickly as possible while trying your best to maintain a combo. In the mainline arkham series, they eventually start adding enemies that have to be taken out in special ways, such as stunning them with your cape or jumping over them as they have armor on their front. Blackgate tries to do the same thing, but effectively gives up after 2 unique enemies as the system just doesn't allow for anything else. The combat isn't absolutely the worst i've ever played, but its definitely the worst version of the Arkham combat system's that i've ever seen. To top it off, the Boss fights within the game are all "Puzzles" of a kind where you must navigate a room in a specific way to hit a Boss 3 times. The frustrating aspect of these puzzle based boss fights is that they may only be solved one way, with no room for experimentation with the Batmans various arsenal of Gadgets and Tools, and also that any mistake will instantly kill you and reset your progress to the start of the fight. These are, in a word, frustrating. More often than not they become a trial of repetition to try and find whatever way the game wants you to subdue the Boss.
An example of one of these incompetent boss fights that irked me the most would be the Black Mask fight. Within this fight, you come in from the left side and use a batarang to take out a single light out of a row of them. This may lead you to believe that you must take out all the lights and take out Black Mask in complete darkness. This is not the case. Instead, you must take out one single light and then duck into the crawl space under the masked Villain, then come out of the end of the vent below him, and hit an alarm on the side you used to be on. This causes him to start shooting in that direction at the sound. At this point, you may think you sneak up behind him and take him out while he's distracted. Unfortunately, you'd still be wrong! Trying this will result in him immediately realizing you're behind him and turn around, filling you with bullets and instantly killing you. What you must do instead is to go back into the grates while he moves towards the center of the arena. At this point, you must jump up from the grates when prompted to one-hit KO him, being one of the few bosses you do not have to hit 3 times. A fun fact about this fight however, is that if you miss that opportunity then the fight soft locks and you have to let him kill you to restart. Every fight is like this, with this much incompetence abound.
You may have noticed at this point that I have neglected to mention any of the Bats arsenal or Toolkit that you use during the course of the game. That is because, frankly, it does not matter. The upgrades you get simply allow you to go into different doors or different vents or break holes into walls but that's it. They serve no other gameplay purpose, no other combat role, nothing. A common trend within Metroidvanias is that the upgrades you get are dual purpose. An example being the Ice Beam from literally any Metroid game. This is both a damage up and allows you to stunlock difficult enemies, it also allows you to freeze enemies and turn them into platforms with which to progress the further into the map. No gadget within Blackgate serves this dual purpose, and as such there's barely any point to even bring them up other to lament their boring design.
The problem with Gadgets is moreso just a part of a much larger pacing problem that the entire game suffers from. Blackgate is divided into three maps, wherein you must search different wings of Arkham Aslyum to find The Joker, Penguin, and Black Mask as they have all escaped and cordoned off each zone into a headquarters for their respective gang of thugs. Something quite common within Metroidvanias is non-linearity, wherein you can get to an objective in any way that you have access to via your upgrades. There are numerous methods where you may even "Sequence break" the game, or do something earlier than you are intended to do so by the natural flow of the game. This is not a design oversight, it is an intentional part of the formula. I can only assume then that splitting up the game into these 3 chunks was an attempt at recreating this non-linearity. But it effectively does not matter. At a certain point in any of the maps, you will be stopped and told to go to another to procure an upgrade to proceed. There are no other options. There is no sequence breaking. There isn't even a point to explore anywhere else. You cannot progress the game until you do exactly what it asks of you. No matter what order you'd actually like to do it in, you will take on Penguin, then Black Mask, then The Joker. You are not allowed to deviate from this path. The fact that this linearity is forced onto you just makes me wish the ability to pick and choose your map had just been taken out and the charade of non-linearity taken away, as it feels more like a slap in the face that everytime I tried to explore somewhere, the game halted me and told me I wasn't allowed to do that.
So, at this point all I have left to cover is the story. As it is, its bare bones. Prisoners have escaped, you need to go chase them back into their cells and restore peace in Arkham, meanwhile Catwoman is helping you out over comms and guiding you to where you need to go next. The opening of the game actually has you spend about 10 minutes chasing catwoman, only to be stopped by literal police when you catch her, to which Bruce simply tells them that the law is actually in his hands as the Batman, and then proceeds to beat up and subdue these police while letting Catwoman escape, who then secretly triggers the entire charade within Arkham so that she may escape with Bane who is hidden within a literal fucking panopticon inside the lowest bowels of the Aslyum. Standard Batman story, very by the book.
But there is something much, much more interesting at play within Blackgate. Something I'm not entirely sure the developers intended. I started this article with a preamble about the latent fascism of Bruce Wayne and the reason for that is because the game seemingly understands that these things are a problem. Within the game, you often can hear the low level grunts that you can fight around the various maps long before they see you. If you simply wait a moment and listen to some of their idle dialogue, they have a surprising amount of complaints about their crazed villainous bosses, but they've also got quite a lot to say about the state of Gotham itself. These citizens of the disastrous city will often lament that they have no other choice than to work for one of these absolute lunatics. They often state they know they will likely die on this job, and that they know they are disposable to their bosses, and generally that they do not like the positions they are in job-wise. However they're very clear in stating that they no choice. No education, being a convicted felon, and most of all with Batman patrolling the streets? A life of crime that leads directly into a stint on Arkham Aslyum is the life of a good 80% of Gothams population. They even talk at times about forming unions before laughing off the idea as they know they will be outright murdered by one of their respective bosses.
So Blackgate is aware of the issues of Batman, right? Its grunts repeatedly belt out the same problems that any easy criticism of Batman has. The problem, however, is that because these are grunts of a gang and because Batman is supposed to be Cool and The Good Guy, these are meant to be treated as jokes. Not legitimate criticisms, not actual problems, just stupid things that stupid criminals are saying. Blackgate is obsessed with maintaining the image that Batman is actually in the right morally for everything he does. An image it only struggles to maintain as its revealed later that Bruce's corporation, Waynecorp, FUNDS Arkham Aslyum. Those upgrades you get? they are various upgrades left around by Bruce's construction teams ON PURPOSE in case a prison riot ever happened. Meanwhile, a minor bossfight early on has a, and I wish I was joking here, black man in prison for a crime he didn't commit directly tell Batman that not only does he not want to hurt him(Penguin has him at gunpoint and forces him to fight you, thus the boss battle) but that he did not commit the crime he was thrown in jail for, and that if batman was at gunpoint with no other option he'd do the same things. Batman simply responds that he, being the rich white man that he is, would never be in the same position as his enemy. Subtle racism, I guess, is another one of Batmans infinite gadgets on his toolkit.
I cannot stress enough how deeply fucked up this all is. Bruce spends his days funding a what is essentially a private prison that he controls in a city that is so poor he is the de-facto owner of it, only to spend his nights putting whoever he decides is a bad person into these prisons while creating the conditions that lead to so many people following a life of crime. The game is explicit about this. It does not do like the rest of Batman media and shy away from the criticisms of Bruces latent fascism, it lays them completely bare. But it expects that you will think Batman is actually morally justified for creating this prison pipeline he directly profits from while he gets to LARP at night as a spectre of justice. It's despicable and while I don't think it was done on purpose, it was clearly a rushed game made very quickly for handhelds so that there'd be a yearly Arkham game, it says a lot about our consumption of superhero related media which already has many problematic aspects that the creators of this game expected, and were likely right to expect, that we would find this latent fascism and prison pipeline inherently understandable and even morally justified and badass. It's one of the reasons I couldn't wait to simply put the game down and never think about it again. Something I'll be glad to do as soon as I finish this article.
So, final words then.
Blackgate is a shit game. Its a shit metroidvania, with a shit upgrade system, a boring story, WILDLY problematic politics and a take on Batman. It doesn’t work as an Arkham game, it doesn’t work as a Metroidvania, it barely functions as anything even remotely interesting to put your time into, I don't know why Warner Brothers was so invested in this world. I don't know why they put so much money into the Origins timeline. But we're all better off with the fact that it failed and that after Arkham Knight, the final of the Arkham Trilogy(from Rocksteady), they planned to end the series.
Oh wait, they're making a Suicide Squad game set in the Arkham-verse due to release in 2021, apparently.
Fucking hell.
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How Double Dragon’s Abobo Became a Beat em up Legend
https://ift.tt/2F8DPGk
In the late ’80s, video games started featuring over-the-top, meaty musclemen. Metro City had Mike Haggar, a shirtless former wrestler who became mayor and decided that being “tough on crime” meant ridding the streets of criminals with his bare hands, his girlfriend’s psycho boyfriend, and a ninja in Nikes. Circus strongman Karnov scoured the world for adventure and treasure, fighting all kinds of mythical monsters. Bald Bull was trying to dominate both the boxing ring and the arm-wrestling circuit. Gutsman was a jacked construction robot who was later rebuilt as a 40-foot-tall tank centaur.
And then there was Abobo, the gigantic antagonist from Double Dragon. He wasn’t THE antagonist. Hell, in the first game, you fight him within the first two minutes. Despite his low-level status, he’s still far more fondly remembered than the main Double Dragon bad guys like Willy and the Shadow Master. There’s just always been something about this random brute that’s made him special.
Abobo’s journey begins in the original Double Dragon, Technos’ 1987 arcade hit. The game’s story is very simple. A dystopian, lawless, post-nuclear war version of New York City has been overrun by a gang called the Black Warriors or Shadow Warriors or Black Shadow Warriors. (They kind of workshop that name from game to game.) Billy and Jimmy Lee are two martial arts brothers whose mutual friend Marian is captured by gang members. Off they go to lay out everyone in that gang with their bare fists and occasional barrel/whip/knife/baseball bat.
While the cannon fodder is mostly made up of normal-sized guys, out walks Abobo, who makes his entrance by punching his way through a brick wall. From the moment he appears on screen, it’s clear Abobo is meant to stand apart from the rest. He has longer reach, takes more hits, can’t be thrown, and is able to throw Billy and Jimmy like ragdolls. The only guy more dangerous than Abobo is Willy, the final boss, who brings a machine gun to a fist fight.
Weirdly, Abobo has various forms in the game. His initial form is as a bald, pale guy with a mustache. Soon after, we fight Jick, an Abobo clone who closely resembles Mr. T. Later, we face off against an Incredible Hulk version of Abobo. This is post-nuclear war, so I suppose this tracks.
But it was NES port that really delivered the ultimate form of Abobo, whose appearance was seriously altered for the 8-bit console. With orange-brown skin, Abobo is still bigger than everyone else, but also looks inhuman. He has a giant, bald head almost the size of his bulky torso, and a black arch on his face that is apparently a mustache merged with a frown! While the NES version had its own quasi-fighting game mode with everyone redrawn with a bigger and better sprite, Abobo looked exactly the same. You just can’t mess with perfection!
Abobo sort-of-but-not-really appeared in the sequel, 1988’s Double Dragon II: The Revenge. In a game filled with giant enemies, there was a guy named Bolo who looked exactly like Abobo, but with long, black hair. Actually, in retrospect, he looks a lot like Danny Trejo.
Huh.
Abobo sat out of the next few Double Dragon games, as the Lee brothers busied themselves fighting mummies and chubby clowns. But he returned in a very unexpected crossover: 1993’s Battletoads/Double Dragon: The Ultimate Team. The game featured a bizarre team-up between the Dark Queen from Battletoads and the Shadow Warriors. As Double Dragon didn’t have too many memorable boss characters that could stack up to the likes of a giant rat in a singlet, they went with what they could get.
As with the other bosses in the crossover gamer, Abobo was depicted as an absolute giant compared to the Lee Brothers and the Toads. He was also very generic-looking, appearing as a shirtless, bald guy with no ‘stache. Due to the sci-fi nature of the crossover, his storyline ended with him getting booted off a spaceship and sent spiraling through space itself.
1993 also gave us the Double Dragon animated series. Somehow, this thing ran for two seasons (26 episodes) and Abobo was there from the beginning. The first episode was a weird Saturday morning-style retelling of the NES game’s plot, down to Billy Lee having to fight his “evil” brother at the end. Abobo acted as a henchman, alongside a very colorful take on Willy.
In the cartoon, Abobo was a bald muscleman with blue skin, meaning he has the same mysterious complexion situation as Captain N’s King Hippo. Abobo was also strangely competent on the show, all things considered, although the only fighting he ever did was throw oil drums at Billy and miss every single time. He spent more of his time annoyed at Willy, who was depicted as a psychotic cowboy with a laser gun — one-half Yosemite Sam and one-half the Interrupter from Late Night with Conan O’Brien.
The second episode introduced the Shadow Master, who immediately showed disgust at his underlings’ failure by magically bonding Willy to a giant mural of punished souls. Abobo tried to run for it, but succumbed to the same fate. The two would remain in that mural for the rest of the series.
While there was a fighting game released based off of the Double Dragon cartoon, Abobo wasn’t part of the roster. It was just as well. Double Dragon V: The Shadow Falls was a really bad game and Abobo had bigger things on the horizon.
Abobo was about to go Hollywood!
In 1994, Imperial Entertainment Group released the Double Dragon movie, a total cheesefest that couldn’t make back its $8 million budget. But Robert Patrick’s scenery-chewing main villain made the movie almost watchable. The story takes place in a version of Los Angeles that’s a cross between The Warriors and No Man’s Land from the Batman comics. Billy and Jimmy are teens who get roped into a plot that involves two dragon-shaped necklaces that form an all-power medallion when put together.
Initially, Nils Allen Stewart plays the gang leader Bo Abobo. As head of the Mohawk Gang, he’s there to act all intimidating in a goofy ’90s bully sort of way, but he really doesn’t actually do much. He takes part in a car chase and teases a fight scene, but nothing happens.
Then, the villain Koga Shuko transforms him into a literal steroid freak with some experimental machine. From there on out, Abobo is played by Henry Kingi in a bloated, rubber suit. Despite being a muscle golem at this point, Abobo STILL doesn’t actually fight anyone and is instead kidnapped by Power Corps.
Abobo eventually sees what he looks like in the mirror. Broken over what he’s been transformed into, he turns on Koga and…still doesn’t fight anyone. He just gives Power Corps some advice to help turn the tide against the bad guys. At the end of the movie, he asks the Lee Brothers if they could be buddies and recklessly drives their car.
Yeah, it’s…almost something. Not the awfulness of Super Mario Bros, but not the good-for-the-time quality of Mortal Kombat. It’s also not quite as fun-bad as the Street Fighter movie, but it does share one major similarity to it.
Much like Street Fighter, the Double Dragon movie had its own fighting game spinoff. Rather than a one-on-one fighter featuring digitized actors (which was the original idea until it wasn’t deemed viable for the deadline), Technos put together a Neo Geo animated fighter that isn’t so well-known these days due to how run-of-the-mill it was. It looked like your average SNK fighting game, with no real identity of its own. The game was released for arcade, Neo Geo CD, and PlayStation.
The 1995 fighting game was loosely based on the movie’s plot and featured some FMV clips. Showing up from the movie are Billy Lee, Jimmy Lee, Marian, Shuko, and Abobo. The rest of the roster is made up of original characters, though Technos did redesign Burnov, the Big Van Vader-looking boss character from Double Dragon II: The Revenge. Abobo more closely resembles his initial, more human-looking form from the movie, complete with mohawk, although he’s cartoonishly big in the game. Fortunately, he occasionally transforms into his blobby, tumor-like mutant form during certain moves and winposes.
His ending in the game features him eating a lot of meat at a restaurant, demanding to eat meat so rough that it’ll make his teeth bleed. Heh. And Roger Ebert said video games aren’t art.
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Double Dragon 4: Story & Multiplayer Modes Detailed
By Matthew Byrd
After the inexplicable crossover, animated series, failed movie, and fighting game tie-ins, Double Dragon as a franchise was finally spent. As the arcade scene died down in the late ’90s, the side-scrolling beat ‘em up disappeared for a time, and it would be a little while before nostalgia for it would kick in.
Fortunately, there was still some juice left in the fighting game genre, and in 2002 the Neo Geo had just enough time left before SNK’s hardware line was discontinued. The company Evoga developed what was, for a time, meant to be a Double Dragon fighting game, but ultimately the team wasn’t able to secure the rights and was forced to make the game with a knockoff cast of characters. The result was Rage of the Dragons, a tag-team fighting game featuring Billy Lewis, Jimmy Lewis, and Abubo…
Abubo does not have a tag partner and is instead a mid-boss so powerful that it takes two opponents to stop him. He’s depicted as a low-level mob boss with a ponytail, sunglasses, pink tank top, and overly-long, muscular arms. It’s a decent enough redesign of the original, but…Abubo? That’s the best they could come up with?
As for the official Double Dragon, it made its comeback a year later. Double Dragon Advance for the Game Boy Advance took the original arcade version, updated the graphics just enough, added more stages, enemies, and attacks, turning this installment into a souped-up take on the classic. This of course meant the return of the real Abobo!
2012 would be a banner year for the musclebound henchman. Since 2002, I-Mockery’s Roger Barr had been trying to develop an Abobo-based fangame, and in early 2012, the free-to-play masterpiece Abobo’s Big Adventure was released to the public and we were better for it.
Using 8-bit graphics, the game follows Abobo as he searches for his kidnapped son Aboboy. Each level is based on a different NES title and features a dizzying amount of Easter eggs. There’s a Double Dragon level, underwater Super Mario Bros. level, Urban Champ, Legend of Zelda, Balloon Fight, Pro Wrestling, Mega Man, Contra, and finally Punch-Out. The game is an absolute blast, especially for anyone who grew up with the NES and features such whacked out moments as:
Abobo mating with the mermaid from Goonies 2, which gives him a forcefield powerup made up of Abobo/mermaid hybrid babies, one of which begs for death!
An Abobo vs. Amazon wrestling match that includes the summoning of Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior, Roddy Piper, and Undertaker assists in the form of Pro Wrestling sprites.
Taking on Krang’s giant robot body with Kirby in the abdominal area.
An incredibly long and over-the-top ending that gets extremely and laughably violent. If you’ve ever wanted to see a muscular child drink blood from the Shredder’s dismembered arm, this game is for you!
In terms of OFFICIAL nostalgia, 2012 also saw the release of Double Dragon Neon for the PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360 (and later PC). Using 3D graphics, the game was a modern update of Double Dragon’s playstyle while playing up the 1980s aesthetic. It was a lot more ridiculous than the original series. In fact, it’s more in line with the Battletoads crossover since this game also lets you launch Abobo into the deep recesses of outer space to die.
This game also gave us the first – and, as of this writing, only – polygon Abobo. This time a towering, hunched over brute with lots of spiked armbands. All that AND the mustache!
But of those two 2012 releases, Abobo’s Big Adventure is surprisingly the better game in terms of its portrayal of the big man, as it solidified his status as nostalgic beat em up icon.
In 2017, Arc System Works put together Double Dragon IV for the PlayStation 4, Xbox One, Nintendo Switch, and PC. Rather than emulate the arcade original’s aesthetic, the game took its art style from the NES games. That meant the return of the classic NES Abobo as not only a recurring enemy but an unlockable playable character. Double Dragon IV actually lets you play through the story mode as various enemy characters, but honestly, who else would you pick in that situation? Well, maybe Burnov.
Sadly, playing as Abobo in Double Dragon IV leads to a non-ending. I know you can’t improve on “Abobo punches Little Mac’s head off so hard it transcends time and space,” but at least TRY!
Around the same time, another game tried to play up Abobo’s ironic/iconic status. River City Ransom: Underground was released for the PC in early 2017. The River City Ransom series has always had ties to Double Dragon, but this high school brawler goes the extra mile by putting Abobo on a big pedestal. First off, he’s the school principal. If you attack any of your teachers, you’re sent to Principal Abobo’s office to suffer a serious slap on the wrist, shoulder, jaw, spine, etc. Sometimes he’ll even enter classrooms by punching holes through the brick walls, all while shirtless and talking like the Hulk.
Even better than that? Abobo’s not only the school principal but the Mayor of River City! No wonder everyone’s always kicking the shit out of each other! God bless Mayor Mike Haggar for being a true trendsetter.
The Double Dragon/River City connection only grew stronger when 2019 brought the absolutely must-play River City Girls. As the story goes, River City Ransom heroes Kunio and Riki have been kidnapped, so their badass girlfriends Misako and Kyoko go on a violent rampage to save them. Early in the game, while Misako and Kyoko fighting in a classroom, there’s a projector playing a short film about a boy learning about puberty.
It just so happens that the kid in the video is being taught by Abobo, who thanks puberty for his monstrous size and strength. This, my friends, is foreshadowing, as Abobo shows up later in the game as a boss.
Misako and Kyoko confront Abobo about their missing boyfriends, and Abobo admits that he isn’t sure whether or not he kidnapped them since he kidnaps a LOT of people. They throw down and we’re treated to the most powerful take on Abobo yet, considering the length of his life bar. Once defeated, Abobo admits that he has nothing to do with the missing boyfriends, but gives the heroes a lead by talking about his side job as security for an upcoming concert.
In 2020, Arc System Works released a collection for PS4 and Switch called Double Dragon & Kunio-Kun Retro Brawler Bundle. It collects 18 8-bit games, including the three NES Double Dragon games, River City Ransom, and all the old spinoffs from the River City Ransom universe. And who’s on the cover?
Yes, despite technically being in one game out of 18, and not even being the final boss of any of them, Abobo gets a major spot on the cover of this huge collection among the games’ hero characters. Finally, the world understands that Abobo is a star. Now we just need Abobo to appear in Guilty Gear Strive and then we’ll really be cooking.
The post How Double Dragon’s Abobo Became a Beat em up Legend appeared first on Den of Geek.
from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/2Gl5jJ9
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How I’d tweak every Smash Character(Part I)
Hello, everyone! Cinnamon-Guardian here! I love Smash Bros to death, but not everything is perfect. I’ve been mulling over some ideas on how to tweak some characters to be better(or at least more accurate to their series of origin).
This won’t be super concerned with balancing, but tier list standings and how broken or whack certain moves are will be taken into consideration. This disclaimer is just me saying I am in no way claiming that I could do better than Sakurai or any of the other developers! This is purely to have fun and flex my creative muscles to try and get better at this sorta thing.
Mario
With Mario, I’m pretty happy with most of his tech, from his standard moves to his smash attacks and his neutral and recovery specials. The aspects of him that frustrate me the most are his down and side specials, both of whom I ultimately think could be better.
The Down Special works well in theory, pushing opponents back without any sort of hit-stun so that it won’t reset their recoveries any. The flaw I see is that it has no use beyond that. As such, I propose that Flud’s bursts do chip damage, akin to Fox’s blaster. That way, it can do very minor damage and still push opponents back without resetting their recoveries.
The Side Special, in contrast, works decently enough in practice but feels hallow in homage. The Cape Feather that it draws upon appeared only once in Super Mario World, a game that admittedly did exceedingly well, but also came out in 1990. When implemented, it works as a great reflector, but nothing more. As such, I propose it be replaced with the Luma Spin from the Super Mario Galaxy titles! The creators clearly know that there is a sizeable fandom for the dualogy, seeing as how Rosalina joined the roster. The Luma Spin could serve as a valuable reflector itself, but could also act as a secondary, more instantaneous smash attack that could even have some horizontal recovery to it akin to DK’s recovery. It could do all that the Cape Feather did and more with a more contemporary fandom!
Donkey Kong
Off the bat, I think something Donkey Kong needs more of is Speed. While he is the poster child for the slow and heavy characters at the bottom of the tier list, in the games where he is playable, he possesses ample agility.
The main means through which I would propose adding more speed is through a more refined dash attack. In the games, he could steamroll through enemies at ludicrous speeds. While I don’t think it needs to be as fast as Sonic or Captain Falcon, his dash attack could be a powerful roll attack that could boost him forward more.
Adding more onto his agility, I believe that his jumps should have much more of a vertical gain and have ample momentum to it. That way, when combined with his horizontally focused recovery, DK could regain his footing much better than most heavy characters. His special moves don’t need much, if any major alteration.
Link
I think Ultimate gave us the best Link we’ve seen to date, made incredibly distinct from the other two and given more weight than before. My thoughts ultimately fall on his grab and recovery.
In order to keep in line with Breath of the Wild, Link lost the hook-shot grab that he’s had since Smash debuted, severally nerfing his grappling prowess. To replace it, I would have altered it to be the Magnesium Powers you get early on. That way, Link can still have a long-range grab, but it could be slower and easier to break out of so that it’s not broken.
As for recovery, Link is still the same old Link, spinning ‘till he pukes. One thing that stood out in BotW, however, was the glider. If brought into Smash, it could effectively be the same as Peach and Daisy’s, with a sharp upward draft followed by a slow horizontally focused descent.
Samus
Samus has always been sort of the Black Sheep of the Original Roster, characterized by idling shooting inefficient projectiles from a corner. A far-cry from the ass-kicking bounty hunter we all know she is! In Ultimate, most of her competitive gameplay is centered around her charging dash attack and her grab, as if she were a football player.
How do we change that? By letting her move more, of course! As such, her neutral special will get a massive revamp, as it defaults to a pea-shooter mode that allows her to move about as she’s shooting, only having to stop for her side special, which itself will be upgraded to the ice rockets because if she can’t move, you can’t move either! The Charge Shot will only come out after you shoot and hold down the Special Move Button, making it practically the only chargeable move that you can freely move and charge simultaneously! The damage for the pea-shooter and charge shot will stay about the same, as anymore would break the game. Every other special move and her grab are all good, but since she’s so mobile, her charge attack will be replaced with a charge more akin to the energy charge she had in Super Metroid
Dark Samus
Okay, so, I don’t HATE hate echo fighters, but I do hate echo fighters who stick too close to the original’s gameplay. Dark Samus is pretty much on par with Daisy in that regard.
Off the bat, I think a slower but more powerful approach would suit her character better. It would also add to the tone of her gameplay more in my opinion.
The only big change I’d make to Specials are the Recovery and Down Special. The Screw Attack is amazing, don’t get me wrong, but it only really makes sense for Samus herself. As lame as it might sound, a massive boost in whatever direction she chooses, akin to Lucario, would fit Dark Samus better.
As for her Down Special, though, I have a more interesting idea. Dark Samus is made of Phazon, a sort of super energy. If she replaced the bombs with charging it up, it could heavily empower her Neutral Special(again like Lucario but more naturally than taking damage).
Yoshi
I kinda love him as he is. No real changes to be made honestly.
Kirby
Kirby is a character that frustrates me. His games have so much creativity with the premise of absorbing powers, but he only uses the Neutral Special of whoever absorbs him. But I do have an idea on how to change that!
Not only will he gain the Neutral Special of whoever he absorbs, but he will also gain “aspects” of that character. For example, if he absorbs Ganon, he becomes heavier and his moves have dark aura effects. If he absorbs Sonic, he and all of his moves becomes faster. If he absorbs Charizard, all of his moves have dire effects and his Side-Special gets a massive upgrade at the cost of damaging himself.
Fox
Okay, so, the thing that made Fox both legendary and infamous was how fundamentally broken he was as a character in Melee. Watching a pro-player use him was like watching a Shonen fight. At the risk of obliterating the tier list again, my goal now is to recapture that without breaking him too badly.
What Fox needs more of is consistent momentum. The main way to tweak this by reshaping the Side Special into something with more raw power but more need for precision. Being a dash attack of sorts, the main goal now is to make it both faster and more chargeable. When Fox crouches, it will charge until released, and it will go in the direction of the analogue stick akin to the recovery. This can be quicker than it is now if you release it quickly, however, though it will do marginally less damage. If running, it will default to the no-charge version for an instant strike for little damage.
This revision, however, would make the recovery seem obsolete in comparison, which is why the Recovery will default do more damage than even the max-charged side and go much further, almost being a smash attack in comparison. As such, we have a very fast and powerful Fox that can move in every direction.
How will it be balanced, then? Well, the Reflector will still be stationary, and most of his attacks will have reduced damage to ensure he doesn’t end every round before it starts.
Pikachu and Luigi
I don’t really have anything for either of these, besides the fact that I wish they have the same Final Smashes as Brawl.
Ness
Can I confess something? I hate Ness and Lucas. So much. I hate playing as either of them and I especially hate fighting either of them.
And you know what else? None of their special moves are canon! That’s right! All of the PK moves they use are from different characters! So my move would be to replace them with a far more accurate and less spam-ridden moveset. That is all. Fuck PK Fire.
Captain Falcon
Okay so, this is a Football Player that makes sense *cough, Samus, cough*. My main concern is that his side and down specials are too similar((much like another speedster)). While I don’t think taking the speed from the second fastest character in the game is at all fair, I think a set-up move for the Falcon Punch could work wonders.
As such, I think his Down Special should be replaced with a flaming kick spin tornado of sorts! That way he can juggle the opponent for some minor damage and set them up for a Falcon Punch that comes out too fast for them to dodge. Make for the best combo in the game honestly.
Jigglypuff
What is there to be done for a joke character? Well, Jigglypuff isn’t a joke character anymore! So a lot, actually!
Firstly, her neutral special should replace her side special. That side was a waste of a slap anyways. For her new neutral, however, it should be a Fairy Type move of some sort. My main choices as of now are “Dazzling Gleam” or “Play Rough.”
Dazzling Gleam is self-explanatory, essentially being a burst of energy in all directions, which is surprisingly rare in Smash(kind of like a weaker but further reaching version of her Down Special). Play Rough could tackle an opponent into a cloud of dirt as they cartoonishly fight until the opponent jumps out, doing combo damage overtime.
That’s all for tonight! I plan on doing more of these down the line, but I don’t have any sort of schedule for that and make no promises.
#super smash switch#super smash bros#mario#donkey kong#link#samus aran#samus#kirby nintendo#fox mccloud#captain falcon#jigglypuff#smash bros
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Altered End: Chapter 4 (The Perfect Plan)
This is the fourth chapter of my Undertale AU! The raw text is below the cut!
FIRST: Prologue --- PREVIOUS: Friendly Reminders --- NEXT: Rest And Release
Sans, Chara, and Frisk appear on the other side of Sans’s shortcut to Snowdin Town’s welcome sign. Chara looks around and gets a feeling of warmth just like any other time they’ve been there, then notices that Frisk and Sans are walking further into town and starting a conversation.
“Sans! I thought you were going to Judgement hall!” Frisk barks.
“Well we DID say that we were gonna visit Pap right?” Sans replies.
“We? What do you mean ‘we’?! You did all the talking!”
“Ehh, fair enough. But I know I don’t wanna disappoint him.”
By this moment, the townsfolk have noticed Sans talking to a complete stranger as if they were close friends, and begin to watch as the skeleton and human continue on. Chara has been keeping up with the duo without being noticed, as per usual for them at this point.
“Dangit Sans! That would have been so simple! Why can’t you make things easier for me?!” Frisk exclaims.
“Woah kiddo, calm down. Didn’t I just do that for you? Besides, it’s a short walk from here to Waterfall once we’re done having dinner.” Sans reasons.
Chara bluntly butts into the conversation with “Frisk, you know he just helped us all the way past the mostly bare parts of this zone.”. Frisk and Sans both focus their attention on Chara as they continue with “All you have to do is have enough patience to spend dinner with these two. That’s certainly simpler than doing battle with all of this zone’s monsters and working at those puzzles, right?”
Frisk groans. “Sure, sure, you’re right. I’ve sat through worse, and my goal can wait for now.”
Sans sighs in relief, thankful that he didn’t have to use anything more than words for this situation. By the next moment, they get to the skeleton brothers’ house, and Sans opens the door and steps aside for Frisk and Chara to come in. Frisk walks in like anyone else would, whereas Chara phases through the wall to the left of the door instead. Papyrus is almost done cooking his spaghetti when he hears the door close.
“Oh? Sans, that was fast! How did you do that?!” Papyrus asks.
“I keep tellin’ ya bro, I got shortcuts.” Sans answers.
“Oh. Alrighty.” Papyrus plainly says, then turns back to his spaghetti, turns off the oven burner, picks up the pot, and dumps it in the colander. He turns in Frisk’s direction as he says “My spaghetti is almost done, human!” then pauses. “Eh? There’s a hand on your shoulder Human. Is that normal?”
Frisk checks both of their shoulders, and sees Chara’s hand on their right shoulder, then looks at Chara, confused. Chara returns the look, then lifts their hand off of Frisk’s shoulder. Frisk then turns to Papyrus, words at the ready.
“No no, it’s totally normal.” Frisk says with sarcasm. “But uh, Papyrus, could you call me Frisk?”
“Huh? You knew my name? Is that another one of your powers?”
Frisk blankly stares at Papyrus for a moment.
“Erm, I can call you Frisk if you want me to! So I, the great Papyrus, shall do so!”
“Thank you Papyrus.”
“Anyways, I’m gonna go up to my room.” Sans says. He then looks to Chara and gestures for them to follow him. Chara catches on, and begins to drift in the direction of Sans’s room. Sans then begins to walk upstairs as he adds “See you two in a bit!”
Chara makes it to Sans’s room first, but then politely waits for Sans to open his room’s door before phasing through the wall anyway. Sans is startled by Chara’s seemingly sudden appearance in his room.
“Wha- huh?!”
“Oh!” Chara exclaims, “Sorry about that, I’m still getting used to the phasing through walls thing…”
Sans uses his magic to shut the door, then turns back to Chara. “So, I have several questions, if I may ask ‘em.”
“Oh sure! Ask away!”
“First off, what’s your name? It’s rather impolite to not properly introduce yourself, right?”
“Oh yeah, I’m not sure what people think of me nowadays, but I’m Chara Dreemurr.” Chara looks away as they add “I didn’t think you would have been able to hide your shock earlier if I said it.”
Sans pauses for a moment, then regains his bearing and says “Welp, you were right about that part. But anyways, do ya know how you became a lost soul?”
“I've been one for a while, but without being visible… I think me messing with Flowey’s menus made me visible to Frisk when we started back at the ruins.”
“Oh, so that flower has those too?”
“Had. Frisk seems like they don’t have any menus right now either, hence why they aren’t doing that hitting-an-invisible-and-floating-button thing when they are about to do something.”
“Huh. Anything else going differently?”
“Well, my check ability isn’t working right. I can only see the health bar and not any definite numbers for stats and stuff like that.”
“That’s odd. Anyways, what are Frisk’s thoughts on this? Do ya know?”
“Frisk has said they know what their goal is, and that they’d rather not dawdle.”
“That explains their temper from earlier.” Sans then pauses for a moment, then adds “Welp, that was the last of my questions. Have any questions for me kiddo?”
“Not any I can think of.” Chara then has a sudden realization. “Oh! Sans, can you come along with Frisk and I? You’d be really helpful!”
“Err, for what exactly? I may have my shortcuts, but I’m not sure if anything else would be too helpful.”
“Okay then. You don’t have to come if you don’t want to.”
“Got it Chara. Should we go check on Paps and Frisk?”
“Oh yeah we should.”
Sans reopens his room’s door, and both he and Chara come out to see what’s happening with Frisk and Papyrus. Once Sans and Chara go down the stairs, and notice an empty plate on the table, as well as an absence of Frisk and Papyrus.
“Where did they go?” Chara asks.
Sans looks back upstairs, then turns back to Chara as he says “I think we walked past ‘em. Seems like they’re havin’ some platonic bonding time.”
“Oh fun. I’ll… Let them do that.”
Some time later, and in a different place in Snowdin, Flowey is getting annoyed. He’s set his trap in the stretch between Snowdin and Waterfall, and has been waiting there for almost the entire day. Flowey thought that Frisk would be coming by to advance to Waterfall, but they haven’t come by yet, and it’s now late at night. As a result of his impatience, Flowey thinks maybe if he catches Frisk while they are unprepared, he can snag their soul, and initiate his plan. Due to the current time and the fact that Frisk hasn’t shown up, Flowey gets an inkling of where that idiot might be. Flowey thinks that he might as well try to ambush Frisk, seeing as Frisk is most likely asleep. So Flowey begins to disassemble his trap and move toward Snowdin, all while looking for Frisk.
Back in the Skeleton’s house, Frisk is asleep on the couch due to the fact that there are no other beds in the skeletons’ possession. On the other hand, Chara has been unable to sleep thanks to seemingly no reason at all. They’ve been attempting to sleep on the floor just in front of the TV, about two tiles away from where Frisk is sleeping. Chara then notices an odd shape beyond their feet, and after a moment of Chara’s eyes adjusting to the darkness, Chara makes out the shape of Flowey just ahead of the front door. In a moment of panic, Chara unknowingly warps themself to Sans’s room just before panickedly (and mostly incoherently) yelling something to the effect of “FLOWEY’S HERE AND FRISK IS IN DANGER” Sans perks awake, and instinctively teleports himself just outside his door, instantly noticing the lot of vines in the house. Flowey is at the foot of the couch as he devilishly smiles to himself.
“Well well well…” Flowey softly says as his vines snake around Frisk, “Looks like you’re-”
Sans is quick on the draw with his blasters. Flowey instantly recognizes the sound of them, and disengages his vines before they can take any damage. In the same moment, Frisk hears the blasters go off and is unfamiliar with the sound, which makes Frisk snap into panic mode. Frisk gets up, bounds off the couch in the direction of the door (and in the process stepping on Flowey), and zips out the door after opening it. Chara floats back into the main room of the house as Flowey recovers from the blunt force of Frisk’s foot, then realizes where his prize went. Flowey quickly disappears into the floor as Sans and Chara share an OH CRAP moment.
Unlike their previous times through here, Frisk is running. From what? Flowey. He’s managed to get behind Frisk and has started after them with his vines engaged and pointed at Frisk. Thankfully for Frisk, they’ve pulled out the toy knife and are advancing faster than Flowey is. Flowey’s inability to catch Frisk for the time being is making his anger build, and he has decided that he absolutely can not, and should not let this idiot human get away. As Frisk continues to run, they can hear vines snaking on both sides of themself, but Frisk has learned from their previous encounter with flowey. Frisk quickly glances to their right and sees a vine coming for the arm, to which Frisk whirls and scores a hit, slicing the vine the moment before it would have gotten hold of them. Another vine attempts to trip Frisk by the ankle, but Frisk sees it coming and hops over it, so far taking no damage. By this moment, Frisk is almost to Waterfall with Flowey a couple strides behind them, and Flowey is at his limit. He summons a mess of pellets then initiates their attack run, and they streak like bullets before they all land around Frisk, completely missing them. As Flowey fumes with anger and comes to a stop, a line of Sans’s blasters quickly vaporizes Flowey’s base of vines, and Flowey’s now missing base makes him tumble in the air just before he cartoonishly hits the ground with a resounding thump. Frisk witnesses this and is frozen with awe, whereas Sans sees Flowey hit the floor, and summons a bone cage around the flower as he summons a blaster and lines it up with the cage’s one exit. Unprepared for the sudden followup attack, Flowey takes a blaster beam to the face, and surprisingly lives with a small percent of health remaining. As Flowey regains his senses, time slows to a crawl, and in this moment, Flowey only has one thing on this mind: staying alive. He had come to the realization that if he dies here, there’s no coming back thanks to the reset button’s nonexistence in this run. Against his desire to start his plan, Flowey disappears into the ground to flee from this battle and recover. Now that the flower is gone, the tension of the battle ebbs from the area, which leads Chara and Sans to look to Frisk, who is standing just beyond where the snow ends in this tract of land. Sans sighs in relief, then begins to walk toward Frisk. Chara begins to drift in the same direction shortly after Sans, but is going slightly faster. Frisk, relieved and with a tired gaze, just watches their approach. Chara gets to Frisk first on account of their faster approach.
“What the heck were you thinking, Frisk?!” Chara loudly asks.
“Well… I thought running would have worked?” Frisk admits.
Chara looks squarely at Frisk and says “You know what Flowey wants to do with your soul by now, right?”
“Yeah yeah, I do. I just thought…”
“Woah hey kiddos.” Sans says as he gets next to both Frisk and Chara. “No one got hurt. Everything’s chill. Can’t ya both be happy you survived tonight?”
Chara and Frisk exchange looks for a moment. On one hand, Chara realizes their mistake of scolding Frisk, whereas Frisk notes that they could have fallen at the hands (and or vines) of that psychotic flower.
“I’m sorry Frisk. I’m relieved we both got through tonight…” Chara admits.
Frisk nods in response.
“Anyways, you two look like you need some sleep.” Sans says, then quickly adds “Want a shortcut back to my place?”
Frisk tiredly nods in Sans’s direction, as does Chara.
“Welp, time to go back then. Come on kiddos.”
Sans begins to walk off, to which Chara and Frisk follow. And like that, they are back at the skelebros’ house. Chara sleepily phases through the door shortly before Frisk opens it and walks through, with sans close behind. All three of them get back to where they were before Flowey’s failed ambush, and softly drift off to sleep.
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