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jazzyjj · 6 months

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My rant about the Apple TV show Invasion that I need to type out or I'm gonna scream.

I just absolutely NEED to talk about this show...and how much I fucking hate Monty as a character.

Yes, I know this is a fictional child but the individual playing him is 18 and I'm only a few years older than him so I'm justifying that its ok. We good? All bases covered? Not really? Well fuck it I'm still gonna do it.

As of right now I have only one episode of the second season left to go but because I don't see much change of his character occurring in the finale, I'm just gonna lock in my feelings about him now.

Monty is a selfish, control freak who never actually changes his ways. He just has a couple conversations with a decent human being where he takes a break from being a bigoted dickhead. And because Jamila SOMEHOW found it in her heart to be nice to Monty, the fucker imprinted on her since she's the 1st person to try and be kind to him not out of fear. This is technically wrong cause Casper was nice to him too, but you know how that went.

But let's give him some credit, he did undergo some character growth. Instead of being the bane of Caspar's existence via physical and verbal abuse and plotting to trap his entire class in a ravine until they starve to death just so he can be in control of them; he switches to pretending to be apologetic and remorseful to Casper about all the pain he inflicted upon him, and then shortly after tries to manipulate Jamila into fearing and abandoning Caspar so she'll run into his arms instead. Yes, I know that was an insane run-on sentence. The dude basically tells Caspar, 'I know you're risking your life for me, and idk the entire fucking world by trapping yourself in the upside down, but I could actually give a rat's ass. Please sacrifice all you want but give up the one good thing you still have and let me have her instead, I'll look after her when die.

He takes the choice away from Jamila to make her own decision about this because apparently, he knows better? And don't worry I'm not leaving Caspar out of this. He's also taking her choice away and then proceeds to purposely hurt her feelings and invalidate her efforts she made to finds him because he believes that's better for her instead of allowing her to fight his demons with him. My guy, she crossed the CONTINENT for you, she almost died like 80 times FOR YOU. The girl is ride or die and you just need to accept that. But I will give him some leeway because he's extremely mentally vulnerable right now and has always been to Monty's influence even when they were in school.

And then I have to painfully endure the classic "I'm no good for you" spiel? I'm pissed. The season is almost over, and I'm broken that this is where Casper and Jamila relationship is, and it's all because of fucking Monty. I was so excited for some 'kids on bikes' when Alfie and Darwin joined Jamila and then Monty had to go and fuck it.

SIGH

I have some hope that maybe the last episode will fix this, Caspar will get his full self back and maybe if a season 3 happens, a brighter future for them will occur without Monty purposefully interfering.

Also last thing, why oh why must Caspar be such a good person, that's what sucks the most about it. The boy has been through so much, watched his mom's abuse and taken on the guilt for her paralysis and then lost her completely, he dealt with his seizures, has been tormented by Monty at every turn and every time he still had empathy for him and showed him kindness and apologized when Monty did not deserve it and it was never returned genuinely.

He's my little guy and I just want him to be happy. Is that so much to ask?!?!

#apple tv #invasion #caspar morrow #invasion apple tv #jamila huston #monty cuttermill #this is long as fuck but it had to be done #I wrote this as I was watching episode 9 #This teenage romance should NOT have me this bent but I can't help it #love triangle

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hymn-of-muse · 9 months

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deepest, DEEPEST apologies, i should've consulted to your pinned first and foremost, i will blame my excitement on this one. once again, apologies love.

i came from your star rail matchup post! and let me tell you, you're amazing at your choice of words and skilled at invoking giddy, blushy feelings 🤭 i would love to request a honkai star rail matchup! now, i don't exactly know what information you seek, but i hope mine is acceptable and not too long for you

ABOUT

either call me grace, or chiyo, & i'm nineteen

— unfortunately, short (5'2 - 5'3) pear shaped physique, basically small tits, and plump lower body (gotta have something else for my lack of chest, so i worked out very hard 🥹)

— i have a neutral colored skintone, more on the lighter side, himecut hairstyle currently, i dress professionally, vintage like, wardrobe consists of black, red and white, silver/golden accessories of rings, a variety of earrings etc. this is when i'm outside anyways to formal events or just my plain aesthetic. i dont try to wear makeup, but when i do, its usually the dark feminine kind

— i'm an ambivert, but i'm not afraid to talk when its necessary or important, but i'm overall eerily quiet, observant, terrifyingly analytical that it threatens my feminity at times (quoted by my mom) i listen, and listen well. too well.

— my... demeanor and aesthetic is very contrasting to how i act around heavily attractive men. i flinch, i hide, i avoid their gazes, i stutter, my resolve fails. i falter — blush visibly in their compelling, appealing gaze. i'm a duality and i don't know if i should be proud or shameful about it.

— however, when i get past my shyness, i'm a tease, an open, affectionate flirt, but i don't flirt to hurt, i flirt to invoke, positive feelings, to make them feel wanted. but when i'm serious about them, it's the opposite, i'm silent, but overly, overly so observant of them, i spectate from afar, i blush from afar, and i seethe from afar when i get jealous, and its visible on my face as well, i'm posessive (and not in a jealous way, i just know what's mine, and mine only)

— and when they're mine. i'm an overly physically touch starved person, so i will shower them with endless touches of love and words any chance i get. i reaffirm their worries automatically, i will take care of them, love them with all my heart, that is of course... if its the same with them. and i dont mind showing love, my vulnerability and patience at all.

LIKES/DISLIKE

— i have a deep affinity for reading, playing games, fictional men (cough) art of all kinds, all kinds of music, anime, italian food, all kinds of desserts, and i love silence, dim lighting, elegant surroundings, and martial arts

— oh and i love when men call me mean nicknames such as "dumbass." "idiot." anything like that toned with affection, you can probably guess one of my main type already just by this info. right continuing, my type of man is so... flexible? it ranges from literal ruthless morally bad characters like blade, scaramouche, to people like welt, nanami, LYNEY. i'm so confusing.

but traumatized, immortal, older men, mature + mean, vulgar little shits? scrumptious, delectable.

— i heavily dislike misunderstandings, so i do my best to inform, and i try even harder to inform when i'm upset, i try my best to avoid conflict, to be silent. as for my case... conflicts usually arise because i'm too analytical, too obsevant, and that isn't a great pair with my severe anxiety and overthinking at all.

once again, sincerest apologies. i assumed you would be able to read with small font, and i fear i made this too long, hell, the one with small fonts had more details- so i toned it down here a bit! but i'm still kind of overthinking that this was too long for you, so if you decide to take on my request — thank you, for taking your precious time for me.

love, hiraeth

ah no worries!

darling youre a sweetheart thank you <3

i skimmed over what i could and at first himeko and kafka came to mind but youre specifying men so i think they'd just be your good friends, like someone you hang out with that matches your vibe to a t.

if youre on the trailblazer side, i say welt. he'd try and hide it through small mannerisms like adjusting his glasses or how he's holding his cane, clearing his throat and changing the conversation topic, but you know exactly how to really make him flustered. he's the type to try and be smooth and formal with his flirting but never expects the comebacks you retaliate with so hes always caught off guard and flustered by you.

he'd be down for some playful banter here and there too.

welt would certainly enjoy spending time in the lounge of the train with you, reading, having tea, maybe occasionally having a cup of himeko's coffee, and generally discussing topics of interest. he's more than happy to listen to you talk and answer any questions you might have.

he's also very quick to act if youre in danger and will affectionately scold you afterwards whether you were being cautious or not in the first place. he'll call you an idiot for running into danger then gently kiss your hand or forehead and tell you he's glad youre alright.

however, if youre on the side of the stelleron hunters, i'd say blade is your fit. i'm quite behind and dont know blade as well as most players now adays but he's absolutely your type.

constant banter, affectionate bullying, pet names that sound like harsh name calling but really are just him not being able to express himself better. that and he's too stubborn to admit how soft he can be for a person.

unlike how welt would be outwardly soft with you, blade is blunt and monotonous, straight forward and acts more like your shadow to make sure you dont end up in trouble or hurt.

he's the kind of person to tease back when youre flirting but also the kind to get jealous quick. he's not normally a pda person but he is one when hes jealous and never really minds you being close or clingy so long as there isnt a fight or something going on.

he's a bit indiferent on how he spends his time, but he does prefer quiet and calm activities.

#link replies #request answered #matchup request #character matchup #match up game #match ups #match up #matchup asks #star rail matchup #honkai star rail matchup #star rail #honkai star rail #star rail welt #hsr #hsr matchup #hsr welt #hsr blade #star rail blade

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miss-smutty · 3 years

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The Destructive Secret

Chapter 7

A/N- I'm back! At least I think I am 😂 I wrote this while I was struggling with writer's block so I don't think it's great but the next chapter I'm working on I feel back to the old me 🥳🤞

Summary- Are your lies finally going to catch up to you?

Word count- 2.8K

Pairing- Chris Hems x reader x Liam Hems

Warnings- Mature themes, cheating, swearing, smut

Strictly 18+ only!

Disclaimer: This is an entire work of fiction/AU and has no affiliation to real life what so ever! This is a fictional story about fictional characters who happen to share names and faces with some real people.

Posted: 2nd Sept 2021

Taglist:- @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke @chickensarentcheap @jjpogueprincess @longlostinanotherworld @mostly-marvel-musings @darklydeliciousdesires @monet-belle

The Destructive Secret Masterlist <

The guy turned to leave before looking back over his shoulder at the door, his hand on the door handle.

"If it makes any difference I would choose you over your brother any day." He winked as he left the room.

"What the actual fuck." You shout, storming out of the bathroom in a huff. "There's no way he's gunna stay quiet, it'll be all over the press come tomorrow." You paced the room, your heart beating fast as the adrenaline rushed through you. This was it, this was how it was all going to end. Liam would know as soon as he saw the headlines, all those late night and weekend conferences at the same time as Chris was conveniently away with work.

"To be fair, he does have good taste in men." Chris' usual nonchalance annoyed you, how come he could stay so calm? Why did he make you sound like a crazy person for actually worrying about what might happen.

"It's really not funny Chris, do you want our business known by strangers before we even have chance to speak to Liam and your Mom Chris, she's going to hate me." You feel the warm tears dripping down your cheeks before you even register you're crying. The thought of their mom hating you upsets you more than the thought of Liam hating you. Cathy, their mom was like your own mother, from day one she'd taken you under her wing.

"My Mom would love you no matter what, you know she thinks of you as her own daughter. It's me she's going to blame, Liam's her baby."

"Yeah you're probably right but still what are we gunna do?"

"Let's relax babe, you don't know what's going to happen and you can't change it if it does happen so what's the use in worrying about it. Come here."

"You piss me off Chris, you're so laid back. This isn't something you can just sweep under the carpet. It's serious." You needed to take your anger out on him, to let it all out so you could feel better. The four walls of the hotel room were becoming claustrophobic, you wish you could just put your headphones on and just run for a while to clear your head, that's what you usually did.

"I know it is but what can we do? I've done everything we can do, now it's out of our hands. We'll work it out tomorrow, can we enjoy our last night together without all the serious talk?" He raises his eyebrow at you, smiling that sweet, goofy smile of his that has your heart melting.

"You piss me off even more when you look at me like that. I can't stay mad at you and how could I say no to that?" You put your arms around his back, loving the way his height makes you feel so small and safe. He wraps his arms around you, stroking your hair and holding you close.

"That's why I love you yanno."

"Why?" You ask, looking up at him through your eyelashes, your neck stretching to reach his height.

"Because you never say no." He laughs, a real laugh that you can feel on his toned stomach, shaking against you. It was the best feeling hearing him laugh like that, it'd been so long since you'd heard him laugh. Your life being full of a lot of drama and upset recently that you were appreciative of the little time you had left together.

"Maybe I should start then." You pout pretending to sulk.

"No way, I love how easy you are." He picks you up so you can wrap your legs around him, looking down on him for once. You punch him lightly on his shoulder, still pouting. "Ok, ok I'll stop teasing. You know why I love you though."

"Tell me."

He sits down on the end of the bed with you still in his arms, resting on his great big, thick thighs. He moves your hair behind your ears so he can see your face, studying it carefully with a look of adoration in his eyes.

"I love you because you're absolutely drop dead gorgeous, I mean the first time I met you, you literally knocked the air from my lungs. I've been obsessed with you ever since." He shuffles slightly beneath you, getting himself comfy. "This would never have happened with just anyone, I'm not a dick that goes around sleeping with his brothers girls." You give him a questioning look, your eyebrows furrowing. "Seriously, it took fucking everything in me to try and resist you. I'd never felt that before, never been one of them that wants what they can't have. Until I met you. Fuck me you were an absolute bombshell." You frown at him. "Are, still are a bombshell, don't look at me like that." He laughs.

"Tell me more." You whisper, feeling yourself tear up at his revelations as you run your hand through his hair, his eyes closing as you do.

"Am I stroking your ego?" He smiles slyly. "Do you remember the first time you met me?"

"Of course I do, me and Liam had already been together a year but you'd been in Australia. I was eighteen, young and dumb..."

"And full of..."

"Do not even finish that sentence, you're ruining the moment." He laughs at you but quickly gets back to being serious.

"You were eighteen and ridiculously mature for your age, I was twenty six and still acted like a teenager. I remember you walking in in that little denim skirt and tank top, smiling at me with that beautiful smile. The first thing I noticed was your eyes, the way they lit up when you smiled. You had me right at that moment, I was smitten. Then you introduced yourself as Liam's girlfriend and my heart sank."

"I can't believe you remembered what i was wearing, it was twelve years ago." You kiss his forehead, holding his face in your hands. So glad you had the opportunity to talk like this, knowing all this made you know you hadn't made a mistake. "I was so nervous walking up to you, I'd only ever seen you on photos and crushing on you when you were in home and away. Then you're there in front of me looking sexy as hell and I knew I had to make a good impression."

"Little did you know, five years later I'd be bending you over that table and giving you everything you'd been searching for?" He questioned, raising his eyebrow at you with a smirk.

"No, dick! Little did I know you'd sweep me off my feet and make me question everything I ever knew."

"I am a dick but that's why you love me isn't it?"

"Your ego definitely doesn't need stroking. I fell in love with Liam when I was still a girl and I fell in love with you when I was a woman. People change, needs change and..."

"And I give you everything you need." His hand travelled to your ass pulling you into him, pressing against his growing erection.

"You do, you need to work on your arrogance though." You laugh. "But seriously I'm done with all this now, we can't go on like this anymore. I want all of you, all of the time."

"So you've made your decision." His lips part, his head resting against your forehead.

"Was there ever any doubt?" You question, running your finger over his lip and grinding against him subtly making him groan.

"Fuck Y/N, I fucking love you so much it's crazy." He says through gritted teeth, holding the small of your back as you raise your hips, your face contorting with need. "What would you do if I asked you to marry me?" His hand travelled down the back of your shorts, cupping your ass in his hands.

"What do you think?" You tease, taking his bottom lip in your teeth and pulling gently.

"I don't know, that's why I'm asking." His face was set seriously, he wasn't joking, he wanted to marry you.

"Of course I'd say yes, once we'd dealt with everything." You smile watching his face light up.

"You're going to be Mrs Hemsworth and mine, not Liam's. I can't fucking wait." He picks you up, gripping your ass making you squeel before planting you back on the bed on your back.

Leaning over you, his palm caressing your stomach, kneeding your breasts with his long fingers. His erection poking into your clothed heat.

"You're so fucking perfect, are you ready to cause destruction?"

"Like now, in bed or?..."

"You know what I mean." He laughs, reaching down to attach his lips to your neck, sucking gently.

"If it means I get you then yeah, I'm ready."

"Right answer. You've made me the happiest fucking man in the world yanno?" His hand moves under your top, pushing it up to your chin as his lips finally meet yours. Kissing you deeply with everything he's got, your body rising from the bed to meet his.

"I think... I can... Make you even happier." You say between kisses, pushing down his boxers, your nails scratching his skin gently as you do.

He rests on one elbow watching you free his cock from its barrier. You cup his balls in your hand, stroking along the length of his cock with the other. He groans, pushing himself into your hands.

"I'll be happier once I'm buried inside this perfect pussy." He kneels between your legs, pulling your panties off before hovering back over you.

"Go slow baby, I want to feel everything." You whisper.

"Fuck, I can't guarantee how long I'll last." He moans, lining himself up and slipping in making you both moan as his cock stretches your walls perfectly.

He rests on his elbows, holding your face in his hands as he gently thrusts into you, wrapping your legs around him and pushing him in further, deeper. Hitting your spot with the curl of his hips, agonisingly slowly. You look into each others eyes, his forehead resting against yours. Tears in your eyes from the intense intamacy.

"I love you Y/N." He declares gruffly, his voice deep with lust.

"I love you too." You whimper.

Moaning everytime his thighs connected with yours, flesh slapping together, bringing your hips up to meet him. Him grunting with every thrust, your sex noises filling the otherwise silent room. The sound like a symphony to your ears, turning you on even more to hear his exclamations of ecstacy.

"It's always been you Chris." You whisper, making his pace become sloppy, losing his composure and restraint at your words. You can see it on his face as it twists, his cock twitching inside of you.

"Come for me baby." He grits his teeth, the muscles in his jaw tightening as his body goes rigid.

"Ah fuck." He brings you over the edge with the last of his powerful thrusts, your legs shaking around him, the feeling of satisfaction melting through your body simultaneously. A proud look on his face as you both come together and he falls limply onto your sweat laced body.

You stay like that for a while, both enjoying the moment, his cock still twitching inside of you. The heaviness of his body burying you into the mattress but you don't complain.

You don't want him to move, you want to memorise the feel of his heaviness and how his cock feels inside of you. How his rough face feels against your smooth skin, his hair tickling under your chin. You trace the muscles on his back, the defined shoulders and lean waist. Your hands gripping his tight, round ass and you close your eyes, remembering every dip and ripple, dreading the thought of being without him in your arms for at least another couple of weeks.

"I don't know how I'm going to watch you walk away tomorrow." He rolls on to his side, pulling you into him. "I think that's the hardest thing to deal with out of everything."

"I was just thinking the same thing." You looked up at him through your eyelashes, your fingers brushing against his tight pecs. "You know we've been doing this for nearly 6 years now and I don't think I've ever felt as close to you as I do now. It's going to be even harder for me to leave this time."

"I don't even want to think about it but we only have hours left together, what's our plan?"

"You mean when and how do we tell Liam?" You ask sitting cross legged in the bed, reality kicking back in. You have to go home to Liam and leave Chris all over again, back to the lies and sneaking about.

"That and when am I going to be able to see you again? I don't want to wait as long as last time, you know how crazy i start getting when I don't see you."

"We've got your cousin's wedding next week. I'll see you there." You risk a glance at him, pain set on his face.

"You'll see me but you'll be arm in arm with Liam and I'll be alone again."

"How about once the weddings over and done with, we can tell Liam about us?" You watch his face change, like a little boy.

"A week? I can do that, I think. But I'm not going to the wedding alone."

"What do you mean? A date? With who?" Panic laced in your voice.

"I don't know but I'm sure I won't be short of options."

"Are you fucking with me? Liam thinks you're dating a married woman, where you going to find one of those?"

"I don't know but I'm not turning up to a family party on my own again, my aunties can be fucking brutal."

"Well don't expect to playing all happy families and me being all nice." You sulk.

"Are you jealous?"

"Yeah, duhh."

"Come here." He pulls you into arms wrapping his legs around yours. Comfortable silence drifting over you both as he strokes your hair and you fall asleep in his arms.

***********

You wake up in the morning smiling, then remembering what day it is and that you have to leave to go back to boring reality and your smile fades. Chris stirring beside you, his muscly arm resting over your stomach, locking you in place.

"Chris, wake up." You whisper in his ear, admiring his sleepy, perfect face. "It's 9.30 we've gotta check out at 10." He makes an unrecognisable sound of exasperation, his eyes opening, puffy with sleep or lack of in this case.

"Aww man, can't we just stay in bed a little longer, I don't wanna let you go."

"You need to go check out first so we don't leave the hotel at the same time."

"Fuck sake. Back to reality it is then." He says all hint of jokiness gone from his tone as he sits up and rubs his eyes.

"I'm afraid so, I need to go grab my things. Text me when you've left please."

"Wow! I feel used, do I not even get a kiss before you run out on me?"

"I was just dealing with the business before I dealt with the pleasure, like I'd just leave without giving you a kiss." You threw yourself on him, wrapping your legs around him as he leant against the headboard. Taking his lips in yours, open mouthed kisses that left you both breathless.

*****

You packed up the couple of things you'd actually taken out of your pull along suitcase, you'd spent most of the weekend naked or slobbing about in Chris' t-shirts so all your clothes were still folded and packed.

You were anxious about going home to Liam and having to pretend again, having to try and not slip up about where you'd actually been. You literally had to go through possible conversations in your mind, conjuring up imagined answers to Liam's possible questions so you didn't get caught out. It was hard work.

Then you got the text from Chris telling you he was out of the hotel and on the road back home, followed by how much of a good weekend he'd had and how much he loves you.

You couldn't help having a spring to your step as you walked through the lobby, a weekend full of love making and reminiscing would have that effect on anyone.

After you'd checked out, the anxiety set in, like stepping out of this hotel would be like stepping in to an alternate universe. A universe that wasn't simple and easy like it had been this weekend but stepping through those revolving doors would mean that will all end. This safe feeling of being alone, away from prying eyes would end as soon as you stepped foot outside and it did, a ominous feeling sweeping over you, goosebumps covering your flesh. Maybe you conjured up the feeling in your own mind, manifesting it into existence but you couldn't shake it.

A feeling of being watched, was it your imagination or not? You didn't know, all you knew was how much you wanted to get out of public and back home. As you stood in front of the hotel, picking up your suitcase to carry it down the stairs, something caught your eye. A flash. And then another flash coming from your peripheral.

#smut #chris hemsworth #chris hemsworth fanfic #chris hemsworth smut #chris hemsworth x reader #chris hemsworth x you #chris hemsworth thor #chris hems x oc #chris hems x you

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oddsnendsfanfics · 3 years

Text

Unraveling the Mystery

Genre: Fan Fiction

Pairing: Henry Cavill/OFC

Warnings: N/A

Rating: PG

Length: Short Story

Disclaimer: a strict work of fiction, I own nothing except the original characters and the plot line. In no way am I affiliated to any of it.

A/N: I have been sitting on this idea, for a while. It's taken forever to get it just right, what can I say? I can't get away from these folks.

Henry Cavill Master List

Sitting in the backseat of the car, Ivan huffed. Arms across his chest, Kal laying quietly beside him, his head on the boy's lap. He was not amused by his parent's Saturday excursion. In the front seat, Nell checked her phone, looking at emails and appointments for the upcoming week. Henry had his eyes on the road, navigating through the small city with expert care and attention.

Saturdays spent as a family were supposed to be fun. Ivan wasn't exactly having fun. Grumpy all morning, he hadn't turned his scowl upside down once. Whatever. His parents didn't seem to notice or care that he was in a pissy mood. Why should they?

When they'd left home, Henry had mentioned going to the next town over, but didn't really say why. Nell had been too worried looking for paperwork. Ivan wasn't stupid, he'd heard them in the office last night. They thought he had gone to bed, which he had, but they didn't know their son had gone back down stairs for a drink. Walking by the door, he'd stopped, originally to say “good night”, again but decided to hold out.

Ivan laid his head back on the seat, Kal nestling in for the remainder of the ride. How could his parents do this to him? The bits of conversation had replayed in his mind all night.

"But if we adopt, then we know it's a girl." Sighing, Nell rubbed her eyes. "I am outnumbered."

"Yes, but what if we can't find the right girl?"

Ivan furrowed his brow, listening through the cracked door. His parents were clearly discussing something that would be a huge part of their family, yet chose to leave him out?

Standing quietly for a few seconds, trying to peep around the office door, he saw Kal sprawled out on the floor. Sleeping soundly. At least his position wasn't going to be given away.

"And we will need to take him. I don't want to bring him home a sister, to find out he's pissed off." Henry continued.

Gee, thanks dad. Ivan rolled his eyes, tears stinging.

Inside of the office his mother's chair scraped the floor. Time to move along. Quietly rushing to get upstairs, before he was caught.

They were adopting and didn't even bother to ask how he felt? What if he didn't want a sibling? What if he was content being an only child? Nobody had bothered to ask him and it hurt.

“Almost there,” Henry announced. Ivan huffed, Nell hummed, and Kal sighed. “Not the response that I was expecting, but okay.”

“I'm excited, I'm busy is all.” Nell glanced at her husband with a warm smile. “Someone has to keep you in costume and Ivan on track.”

“Whatever.” Ivan muttered, rolling his eyes. So now they pretend to care.

“When we're finished, do you want to go for a walk and grab something to eat?”

Leaning around in her seat to see Ivan; Nell smiled. “What do you think wild boy? Should we grab something to eat after? I hear they have a great sushi place just around the corner.”

“Whatever.”

“Is that all you can say today?” Nell raised her brow.

Ivan shrugged.

“Well, then. I guess you don't have an opinion, then we will go wherever we see fit.”

“Why ask me where I want to eat, you didn't care to ask me if I even wanted to come.”

“We thought that you'd enjoy an afternoon out.” Henry answered, checking that he was clear to make the right hand turn. Pulling into an empty space, he killed the engine. “We're here.”

“I'm excited.”

“I'm not.” Grumbled Ivan in reply to his mother's enthusiasm.

Leaning over, Henry was the one turned to face his sullen son. “Okay, before we go in. Care to tell me what's going on?”

In the back seat, Ivan tried his best not to allow his tears to fall. If they began then they may never stop. Dramatic? A little. He couldn't hold it in any longer, his parents had truly hurt his feelings and trust. Why had they not trusted him to tell him the truth? If he hadn't heard them talking, would they have simply brought another child home and told him to deal with it?

Sniffling, he wiped his hand across his cheeks. How silly did he look?

“Ivan?” Henry prompted, gently reaching out to his son.

Shrinking away, Ivan continued to sniffle. Shaking his head, Ivan opened his mouth to answer, but only a sob came.

“Are you okay? Ivan, you can talk to us.” Encouraging her son, despite her heart clenching, Nell tried to smile.

He had been out of sorts all morning. Taking it as he was annoyed to be woken so early, Nell had ignored his bad mood. She'd figured it would change, when they arrived to meet the puppy. On the seat beside him, Kal laid with his head still on Ivan. Nudging him gently with his nose.

“You didn't even ask me, how-how I felt.” Ivan whispered.

“Felt? About what? Are you not feeling well?” Concern etched Henry's face.

Ivan shook his head. “About adopting. Why? Why would you do that and not talk to me? A sister is a pretty big thing and you didn't even ask, if I wanted one.”

In a second, Henry could nearly feel his heart breaking for his son. Clearing his throat, he rubbed the back of his neck. Nell sprang into mom mode. Taking over, giving Ivan a soft smile and passing back a tissue from her bag,

“Oh, wild boy.” Cooing, Nell shook her head. “No, I think you have it wrong.”

“Do I? Oh really?”

“Yeah, we're um...we wanted to keep it a secret, in case Kal didn't get along with her. But then we were so excited, we had to bring you. Ivan, we're here to see about adopting another dog.”

“A dog?” Ivan sat up his interest fully engaged. Henry laughed and nodded. His mood changing faster than a speeding bullet. “A dog? We're getting another dog?”

“Maybe.” It was only fair that Henry laid down the rules now. “If she and Kal get along, then we will take her home. For a week. If they manage well, then she is ours. If they don't, then we have to bring her back. We didn't want to tell you, because we wanted to surprise you.”

“You better like her.” Ivan gently booped Kal's nose. Kal snuffled and yawned.

“I wish you had told us, how you felt. Oh god, I'm sorry.”

Last night, while in the office, Nell had heard a creak outside the door. Assuming it was another feature of the older home, she had ignored it, continuing her conversation with Henry. Shit. Now she felt terrible. How Ivan must have felt, beyond her comprehension. No wonder the poor boy had been in a rotten mood. Assuming his parent were making life decisions and not bothering to inform him.

“It's okay mum.” Ivan shrugged, “I shouldn't have assumed.”

“Wild boy, we would never adopt another child, without talking to you. Honestly.” Nell informed her son, her caring smile growing.

“Unless something changes, drastically, we will never have that conversation. So I think you are safe.”

“But I thought you wanted more kids?” Eyeing his father cautiously, Ivan wiped his nose on the tissue and snuffled once more. His tears dried on his cheeks.

Henry shrugged, glancing at Nell and smiling. “Once upon a time, I would have loved to have a dozen kids. But, I think that time has gone. You're older now and I know that you enjoy being an only child. Besides, your mum and I don't have that energy anymore. Chasing small children, it's too much work.”

“Well, now that we have this cleared up. Shall we go meet the potential, puppy?”

“Yes, please.” Ivan sprung up, grabbing Kal's leash to get the big dog out of the car. Opening the car door, he shuffled out to join his parents, promptly handing Kal to Henry.

A shift in his mood, Ivan could barely contain his excitement, asking his parents all kinds of questions. The short distance from the car to the shelter didn't give them much time to answer, but Nell did her best to fill in any information that Ivan was requesting. They had found the puppy on the website, not really looking for another dog.

Her name was Tilly, she was almost a year old, an energetic doxie pinscher mix. Her mother rescued a few weeks before Tilly and her two brothers were born. Ivan didn't even have to see her, to know she would be the best dog – best small dog – ever. Clearly Kal was the best dog ever. Henry allowed Kal a few minutes outside, while Nell and Ivan went inside to inform the staff that they had arrived.

“Mum,” Ivan whispered standing beside her, in the lobby, waiting for the assistant to join them, “I'm sorry.”

“It's okay, wild boy. You have nothing to be sorry for, but the next time come talk to me. I don't like it when you are upset.” Nell wrapped her arm around him, kissing the top of his head.

“Mrs. Cavill?” A tall woman asked walking into the room. Nell nodded and smiled. “Hi, I'm Aly. I'll be hanging out with you today.” She glanced at Ivan and smiled. Carefully looking passed Nell, she shifted. “You mentioned bringing your dog?”

“Yes, he's outside with my husband. It was a bit of a drive up. Can you go let your dad know that he needs to come in?” Nell ruffled Ivan's hair.

Nodding, Ivan did his best to control his excitement, reminding himself to walk towards the door. Calmly, he took a breath. Spotting Henry and Kal on the small patch of grass, he waved opening the door to call his dad. Excitement, contain. Breathe. Ivan straightened his posture before walking back across the office to his mother.

“He's coming.”

“Do you want to follow me in, when he comes in then I can have them sent back?”

“Sure, sounds good.” Following Aly behind a set of doors, Nell and Ivan walked hand in hand. It was not at all what Ivan imagined. There were no rows of barking dogs, instead it was a calm and quiet group of rooms. Each one with large windows and a door. Inside the floors had patches of fake grass, tile flooring, and a few toys.

“The last time that you were here, I know that you and your husband had met Tilly and Anduin.” Holding open a door to one of the rooms, Aly addressed Nell. Ivan raised his brow. So his parents had been here before? “Did you want to bring them both out?”

Slightly blushing, Nell gave the assistant a sheepish smile. “I'm not going to lie, I really adored Tilly. I agreed to bring Anduin out, to humour my husband.”

Ivan giggled. Of course his dad would have wanted to meet Anduin.

“Ah, I understand. Okay, well I am going to get Tilly. You can make yourselves comfortable.”

Ivan sat in one of the plastic office chairs, swinging his legs lightly, his feet not that far from the floor. Nell stood in the corner by the floor to ceiling window, watching for Henry and Kal. Humming contently, Ivan tried to picture what this new dog would look like. She would certainly be smaller than Kal, not even the size of Kal's leg. He giggled at the idea of the little dog bossing the old bear around.

Would Tilly like them?

“What's Anduin like?”

“Huh?” Nell turned her head to look at Ivan, she had been lost in her thoughts of upcoming projects and school sport schedules.

“Anduin, you said that you only saw him because Dad wanted to.”

“Oh, he's a nice dog. But he's big and bouncy, he's still young and they said he had a bit of an aggression problem to work through. I'm sure he'll make someone a great dog, but he's not what we need. Not right now.”

Ivan nodded in understanding. As much as they loved Kal, one big dog was enough. He sat looking around the room, when he and his mom spotted Aly at the same time. Taking a step back from her post, Nell held out an arm to Ivan, indicating she wanted him to join her.

Entering the room, Aly had a small dog in her arms. Licking her face furiously, the dog wagged her tail, excitedly enjoying the interaction.

“Here is Tilly,” bending to sit the puppy on the floor, Aly smiled at Ivan. “Why don't you take a seat and get to know her?”

“Mum, momma, mum.” Ivan tugged on Nell's sleeve. “This is the best surprise.”

“I'm glad you're excited.” Nell kissed the top of his head. “Do you want to play with her? Get to know her a little, before Kal comes in?”

On the other side of the windows, Nell caught sight of Henry and Kal approaching. Kal looked around cautiously, following Henry into the small corridor. Nodding to his wife and giving a slight wave, Henry smiled. He would wait right where he was, until asked to bring Kal in. Kal sat at Henry's side, watching through the window, a slight whine when he saw little Henry playing with the ultra small dog.

Sitting down on the floor, allowing the small brown dog to climb on him, Ivan giggled. Her whole body shook with her tail wag, as she bounced on and off of the boy's lap. Aly smiled, watching the two interact.

“They certainly get on well.”

“Ivan loves dogs.”

When Henry and Nell had come to see the dogs, it had been Henry on the floor giggling like a child, while the puppy had climbed all over him. Nell had joined in, sitting and tossing the ball for both Tilly and Anduin. But Ivan was by far the one in his true element.

“Let's see how Kal does, shall we?”

“Of course.” Nell waved for Henry to bring Kal in.

Opening the door, Henry gave a gentle tug on Kal's leash. The big, black and white dog was hesitant to enter the room with the smaller creature. She was full of the zoomies and her bark was fierce.

“Kal.” Henry called to his companion. “Come on. It's fine.”

Reluctant, Kal shuffled into the room, snuffling and snorting. Making sure to keep Henry, Nell, Ivan, and the strange woman between him and the small fur missile. The small brown dog darted around Nell, between Henry's legs and right up to Kal. Pulling back on his leash, Kal was wide eyed. No! No way! She was growing closer.

Without warning Tilly stopped a few inches from Kal, reaching out she sniffed his foot and took off. Too concerned with her return, Kal was having a hard time relaxing. His fear was soon soothed, when Nell reached down to offer him a biscuit. Oh so now they were buying him off with food? Eh, fair enough.

“Why don't you pick her up, then she's not as bouncy.” Aly smiled at Ivan.

Scooping the puppy into his arms, Ivan smiled when she began to instantly lick his face. “Tilly.” He giggled, holding her out to his dad.

“Come here, sweetheart.” Henry accepted the puppy. She was tiny compared to Kal, even as a baby. Henry smiled holding the wiggly body, trying to control her enough to let Kal get a proper look. “Look Kal, see the baby.”

Kal huffed, sinking down to the floor. His head resting on his paws. How dare they.

“Have a look, bear.” Henry encouraged the older dog. Bending down with the puppy, he laughed when she licked his chin, giving playful bites. “She's okay. Easy fella.” He steadied Kal, who had lifted his head a little. Sniffing towards the puppy, he sat up. His head tilted slightly. Henry eased Tilly closer.

Reaching out, she yipped in Kal's face, but didn't shy when his big nose poked her in the belly. Licking at Kal, she wagged her tail fiercely.

“I know that you love being the only dog, but would a friend be terrible? She's a friend. Not a chew toy.” Nell eyed Kal.

Huffing, Kal sniffed the puppy once more, before scooting back as Henry let her go on the floor. Instantly zooming around the room, Tilly bumped into Kal. Reacting less dramatically, Kal groaned and flopped down onto the floor. His eyes following the puppy, his desire to chase the small creature almost void. He was too old for this shit.

“I think we should take her home, what do you think?” Henry glanced at Ivan.

“Yes, please.” Ivan nodded eagerly. “What about you, Kal? Do you want a sister?”

Kal huffed. He didn't care one way or another.

“I think we will definitely be taking her.” Nell smiled. Stooping to scoop up the puppy, she scratched Tilly's ears and smiled wide.

“Your mum has a new mate,” Henry nudged Ivan in he side, gesturing to Nell snuggling the puppy.

“Maybe this means she won't bother me so much to do things.” Ivan snickered.

“Don't bet on it,” Nell smirked, she'd heard their chat. When would they learn, she heard everything.

Settling the final paperwork, gathering instructions, and all the legal work that went with adopting dog had taken mere minutes. The shelter were efficient, set up, and knew their business. Henry admired that. Nell had been the one to find them, assuring him that they were reputable, reliable, and a decent place to work with. She wanted nothing but the best, when it came to their newest addition.

Thanking Aly, posing for a few photos – as was custom for the shelter, when an animal found a new place, and making sure they had all of their paperwork, instructions in case Tilly needed to come back. Ha! They were on the their way, the five of them.

Kal led the way to the car, he had snacks waiting and needed to finish that nap he'd been taking. Henry opened the door, allowing Kal to get situated, before Ivan and Tilly joined him. Giving the big dog word of encouragement, telling him how fantastic he'd been with the entire thing.

“Mum, momma, mum.” Ivan bounded towards the car, at his mother's side “I'm sorry for being upset this morning.”

“You have nothing to apologise for, wild boy.” Carrying Tilly; Nell wrapped her other arm around Ivan. “But do me a favour, the next time you want to eves drop, come to us before assuming things.”

Tag List Chat

#henry cavill #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill fanfic #oddsnendshenryfics

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queen-of-my-goofball-army · 3 years

Text

“Fun? Sure. I think I had a lot of fun in fact. At least in the beginning. For a while. But then everyone disappeared. They leave you behind when you get good." (Miya Chinen, Sk8 The Infinity.)

We end my comfort character official month that made the cut with one last visit at a recent anime that changed my life. I watch very few seasonal anime but I owe my love of this show to my best friend Pino. I pretty much watch anything that she recommends since her opinion has become trustworthy since she got me into both Promare and Millionaire Detective. But we're here to talk about the amazingness that is Miya Chinen in Sk8 The Infinity.

When we first meet Miya in the show he's seen as a spoiled brat but a good skater. He's talented tor his age and seen as a child prodigy. However, his personality and respect for authority needs a little bit of work. It's all with reason though as we see in a flashback that his friends abandoned him once he got to be a better skater than they were. He was just trying to have fun with his friends and they all decided to stab him in the back and make him weary of making new friends. It broke my heart to hear all of what he had been through with his classmates and former friends.

As somebody who's previous friends have also been known to be pieces of absolute human garbage I just want to give this baby a hug and tell him that everything will be alright in the end. That this is only a passing fad and that things will get better in the future. As long as you keep your chin up good things will come your way. That's what I've learned through my years of being alone. All those years of being alone have brought me amazing friends now that I'm older. Miya never gave up on his skating though which I think is amazing. He's clearly passionate about the sport despite all the pain and trauma it's given to him.

We see throughout the show that his mom doesn't really care a whole lot about what he does either as he's almost never seen at home. He's usually shown either out with the main gang or at Joe's restaurant. Throughout everything no matter what you knew that he'd find his found family. He had people that cared about him now. He loved his small family even if he often complained about Reki's clinginess (more about this later!) he did grow and develop throughout these few weeks after he met all his friends.

Reki and Miya have by far my favorite platonic relationship in the entire show. I just love these two more than anything else and their friendship. They are adorably quirky but at the same time you see them grow into stronger friends. Even though Miya was worried about his "older brother" figure. They were extremely charming and I loved them together. Miya and Reki's relationship was just so much of the older brother tormenting the younger brother. I *LOVE* these two just way too much they're so cute and funny together. (My favorite is definitely when Reki stretches Miya's face.)

Voice acting is actually a newcomer! I had never heard of him before this show but Miya in the dub was voiced by Ry McKeand. I think that this was his first major character in an anime but he was amazing! He has to do voice cracks quite a bit because Miya is of course, still getting his voice under control during puberty. And the voice cracks are both adorable, and accurate as hell. I'm super impressed by the talent that Ry was able to bring to Miya since he was so complicated. At first you dislike him because he just seems like an entitled little brat but the more you find out about him and see what he's gone through you find that he's actually a lot stronger of a person and a better character than your initially thought.

All throughout my childhood through my adult years I always found my favorite characters to be either the goofballs or the baby's who are the cutest members of the cast. Miya definitely fits into the second category. Through everything, my comfort characters have always been there for me. Despite me growing up lonely I had plenty of friends. It's just most of them are all fictional. I loved them so much. No matter what I'm going to continually lean on my comfort characters for serotonin.

#sk8 the infinity #miya chinen #favorite characters #comfort characters #my baby #day 30: sk8 the infinity

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abyssalhuntersnerd · 3 years

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I like your post about Abyssal Hunter, what do you think about Gladiia per her personality and character?

Thank you! I'm so glad you do! Knowing that makes me feel at ease and a bit less embarrassed about how much I scream about them. o(╥﹏╥)o

Oh, Gladiia. I freaking love Gladiia. I already did prior to this event coming out but she definitely has grown on me even more after UT's global release.

I love her personality. She isn't someone who would fall into the category of being nice at first, just like the rest of them because, you know they eventually warm up to you after some time. If she's being nice to you, you should actually worry because that just means she might not actually care about you in the slightest. You are better off if she's actually messing with you. She has her own reasons to feel distrust towards Rhodes and that's something I can't blame her for in the slightest.

I do love that she is, well, literally another being of pure chaos but she's a little bit more formal and responsible when it comes to it. One of the biggest misconceptions everyone, including myself had, was that she was the responsible one out of the 3. Turns out, she's a rowdy gal at heart who is just as brutal as you could hope an Abyssal Hunter to be and will beat you up for as long as necessary, even take some pretty high risks to do so to get what she wants from you. Skadi now has 2 Abyssal Hunters she needs to keep under control because one was not enough. And the two love messing with her, which makes it even funnier. That just kinda tells you what kind of person she is.

Not only that, but the way her freaking demeanor changes when Specter wakes up and starts being the smug little shit we all love, she's smiling the whole damn time like a proud mom. And that's fucking fantastic.

Gladiia essentially is just a very chill and honest gal, who loves a good fight and to get as rowdy as possible as she can from time to time. And that's beautiful because the whole second company was literally like this.

She's also very goddamn smug. And also very proud of Aegir's technology along with herself and the other Abyssal Hunters.

She's also rotten smart. We don't talk about this, but this whole event was something she planned to find any help she could to make Specter better, while also making Skadi an indirect pawn to her plan and to find out the truth about what they really are. It all works out for her.

Her plan is risky and she could get killed while she finds the answers she's looking for and she puts her life at risk to do so. When the whole ploy is later on revealed, you can clearly see this was all her doing and she had it all planned. Again, she's a very smart lady who can come out with some pretty good plans to get the things she wants. So be careful, cause you'll never see her coming and she's a better actress than she let's on.

Overall, she's a great character with a really fun and unusual, yet entertaining personality who does things for a reason and will continue to do so from now on. She's fun. I love her. I don't think I can fit all the things I love about her in one single post but she's definitely one of my favorite fictional characters ever now.

Long live the Swordfish Captain.

#asks #sleepy answer now I try to get some sleep because I woke up in the middle of it and now I can't fall asleep again

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wiitzend · 2 years

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Sorry for spamming your notifs earlier today akdjsjd, hope I didn’t come out as weird!! N Knee Ways, what’s your url from? Cause honestly whenever I see if I think of “Whit’s End” from the radio theatre Adventured in Odyssey, but I’m like 96% sure it ISN’T from that so I’m curious!

Also! I see you’re watching True Beauty! I just started it yesterday and I would love to chat about it!! I agree Seo Jun is DEFINITELY living up to the hype, but tell me your thoughts (which I believe are negative) about Su Ho! Honestly, I’m liking him more than I thought I would, I kinda like him a little bit but I’m willing to be persuaded lol (him patching up Ju Gyeong’s knee was sweet AND him beating up the cheating blind date was nice)

Have you seen any other kdramas that you would recommend? Do you have any specific ones you want to watch soon?

hi! oh no, don't apologize, it's not weird at all. my url is actually spelled "witzend" which is a fictional place from alice in wonderland.

ahdjkfjklgfjl you're watching true beauty too!!

honestly, true beauty really isn't that bad. i thought the whole reason for ju gyeong getting bullied because she was "ugly" (which she most definitely isn't) was sort of dumb?? to me, she just looked pretty ordinary, but i slowly got over that. honestly, she's a great character overall and i just wish her family was more supportive of her (especially her mom like girl. GIRL.). i'm almost finished the series, and i was hoping the show would dive a bit more into korean beauty standards and the things in society that push us to into categorizing people as "beautiful" and "ugly." i'd love for it to touch on makeup culture, social media and the hive-mind that can come from bullying. but alas.

HAN SEOJUN MY BELOVED!! <33 he definitely carries the show, imo. i love how he's portrayed as this intimidating bad boy only for the show to cut to him worrying over his mother in the hospital. we have no choice but to stan. it took a bit more time for me to warm up to su ho, but i like him a lot more now than i did in the earlier episodes. his cold exterior holds a really gentle heart, and honestly this kid has really gone through so much adkkjgefgl like please give this boy a break. i still think that ju gyeong would've been a better match for han seojun. their chemistry is off the charts and honestly the brain cells plummet into the negatives whenever they're together but that's what makes them so endearing. if you ever want to talk about true beauty, my inbox is always open!

i don't watch a lot of kdrama, honestly. but i'm trying to expand my list. idk if you've ever seen age of youth (hello my twenties on netflix), but i highly recommend it. the first season is just *chef's kiss* utter perfection. the second season is...there. it has its good points, but it's not nearly as good as season one. hometown cha cha cha is another good one! very relaxed and light-hearted. i've heard good things about it's okay not to be okay, but i plan on finishing true beauty before looking into that one.

#i'm sorry this reply is so long! i just have a lot to say #we all know that sweet home made me emo 😭😭😭 like what was that #yes i do have an alice in wonderland url because i don't have an original bone in my body #asks

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stay-tinystars · 3 years

Text

Rumors pt 2

Ship: Yeosang x Named female character (Jae Hwa)

College AU. ‘Bad’ girl x shy studious Yeosang.

Some fluff, some angst, mostly slice of life, a bit chaotic

Warnings: overly controlling parents, rumors, cursing, motorcycle.

Word count: 2.8k

A/N: this is a short series. I hope you all enjoy it. I’m trying out different writing styles as I get back into writing so I hope you enjoy.

All of this is pure fiction.❤

She expected to hear from Yeosang, or to see him somewhere at the university over the next week. When she didn't she decided it was best to approach his friends.

"Excuse me, do you know if Yeosang is alright?" Jae approached two of Yeosangs friends in the dining hall, at the usual table. They looked at her in slight shock.

"Yeah, he got in trouble for who knows what now." San shrugged.

"Apparently he got home late, and they grounded him." Wooyoung added.

"What about his schooling?"

"Thats where they got weird. They contacted the professors and got some work packets or some crap" Wooyoung rolled his eyes.

"Oh" she mumbled, as she sat on an empty chair at their table.

"Why do you ask?" She could see mischievous looks in their eyes as they looked at her.

"Well, long story short. He helped me catch my dog, who was running around the park, and we started talking. Then his mom called because he was late. I took him home, gave him my number. Then he disappeared" she rambled, her thoughts piling on top of one another. This was her fault.

"They took his phone. His parents are intense. They treat him like he's 10, instead of an adult" Wooyoung leaned back on his chair, folding his arms, intrigued by the soft 'bad girl' in front of him.

"How do you guys talk to him then"

"Secret messages" San lifted his eyebrows, then laughed, his dimples highlighting his face.

"He messages us through our gaming systems. His parents don't know how to block that"

"Can you tell him I'm sorry"

"I can do you one better"

"What do you mean?"

The two boys just smiled at each other, mischief glinting in their eyes.

"Meet us at 10 tonight, at the park by his house"

"Why?"

"We're sneaking him out."

The park was dark, it seemed as if the light posts had burned out. She pulled up and parked next to the only car in the small parking lot, three figures stood in the dark.

"Did you have to bring your motorcycle?" Wooyoung asked, as she took off her helmet, and strapped it to the back.

"It's the only thing I have" she responded, placing her hand on her hip. "So how are we doing this?"

"Well you are going to help by being the distraction" Seonghwa nodded

"What kind of distraction?" Jae asked. Her eyes wide.

"Well maybe it's a good thing you brought your bike" San's eyes darkened, as he eyed her motorcycle, and shrugged the bag he was carrying off his shoulder. Her heartbeat picked up.

"I'm not wrecking my bike!"

"We will help you fake it." Wooyoung unzipped the bag, as San handed it to him. She felt like these guys were ganging up on her. Why did she come? Why was she trusting these guys she barely knew? She took a deep breath, and gathered her thoughts. This was for Yeosang, the one she got in trouble. The only guy who hadn't written her off. Maybe these guys weren't so bad, they are Yeosang's friends.

"My baby better not get damaged. I just paid it off!" Her voice was hard, along with her gaze.

"Your bike won't have any harm. We will just lay it down next to the curb in front of Yeosang's house." San held up his pinky, as if he was promising her to keep her bike safe.

"I don't like this idea" her arms folded over her chest, as her eyes narrowed.

"Look, do you want to help Yeosang escape or not?" Wooyoung approached her, she sighed and reluctantly nodded. "Good, now take off your jacket."

"What?"

"Just take off your jacket. It will help with the ruse" Seonghwa smiled. His smile, genuine. She shrugged her jacket off, and watched as Wooyoung opened a jar full of red liquid.

The three boys started smearing fake blood all over her right arm, and over the slits and holes in her jeans, mostly on her right side.

As they informed her of their oddly concocted idea for Yeosangs break out. They told Yeosang to find a clip of screeching brakes to play loudly upstairs, then to flash the lights twice, at which point Jae, who would be out on the curb, would scream. Knowing how Yeosangs parents act they would come out front at which point they would sneak him out the back of the house.

Jae stood at the end of a driveway, Seonghwa and San had helped lay her motorcycle down a few feet away then ran. She watched the 2nd story window. She saw the light flicker twice, she let a blood curdling scream, bending over holding her 'bloodied' arm to her chest, along with her helmet. A few moments later the front door opened.

Jae started cursing, and acting just as the boys had coached her.

"Did you see that jerk! He ran me off the road!" She yelled.

"Well what do you expect riding a death trap!" Yeosang's mothers judgemental voice rang in her ears. The boys were right, Yeosangs mother was a piece of work.

"I wasn't in the wrong!" Jae defended herself. "I was just doing the speed limit, when that car came out of nowhere and side swiped me. Did no one see it?"

"Do you even live in this neighborhood?" Her words sounded like venom, Jae could feel the judging eyes, she always did.

"I was visiting a friend." Jae was appalled, they hadn't even blinked an eye at her 'injuries' nor had they asked if she was okay. She couldn't act any longer, she shook her head, and grimaced. "If you guys won't help me, I'll take myself to the hospital" Jae put her helmet on faking gasps of pain. She raised up her bike, and started it.

How Yeosang, one of the sweetest people she had ever met, had come from that toxic household she couldn't understand. She sped off towards the park. Hoping she had given them enough time to help Yeosang escape. She parked her bike, and took off her helmet, watching around her. She saw four shadows approaching warily, along the tree line.

"Oh my God! Jae are you okay?" Yeosangs voice was concerned, as he hurried towards her.

"I'm fine" she stated, leaning against her bike.

"You don't look fine, your arm, your leg! We need to get you to the ER." His panicked face only seemed to grow in worry as he continued to analyze Jae.

"Did you jerks not tell him anything?" Jae shook her head, standing up and walking over to the hood of the car where her jacket sat.

"Well we told him you were helping us out." San started.

"We just spaced the whole, covering you in blood and pretending you got into an accident." Wooyoung finished.

"It's all fake, don't worry, Yeosang." Jae started rubbing her arm trying to get off the fake blood, it didn't budge or smear. "What did you guys put on me?"

It turns out San is a theater major. Which is why he had fake blood. However he had mixed too much coloring into it, so he insisted that they should all return to his small two bedroom apartment, which he and his roommateYunho shared. That's where he had the items to take off the fake blood. The apartment was small, yet comfortable. Jae had been guided into the small bathroom by San, who showed her the cleanser, and how to use it. Jae took off her shirt, so she was in her tank top, staring at herself in the mirror over the sink as she tried to scrub off all the fake blood, with the stage makeup remover. There was a knock at the slightly opened door.

"Hey, thanks for the help tonight" Yeosang said as he poked his head in.

"You're welcome. I knew you told me about your parents. I never expected them to be so harsh." She ran the rag under hot water, to start rinsing off her skin, which was mostly free of the fake blood.

"You met my mom" he stated as he closed the toilet lid and sat down watching her.

"She's a piece of work. She never even asked if I was OK. Just kept going on about how my motorcycle was a death trap. "

"She really hates motorcycles."

"I can tell. But answer me this. How did you end up so sweet when she is just…. Ugh" Jae threw her head back.

"My dad is quite nice, but he does whatever she says. He says it's out of love, but I think he's just as scared of her as the rest of us are." His shoulders slumped, as he stared at the floor. Jae watched his actions. He reminded her of the hurt animals at the shelter, who couldn't understand why they had been mistreated. Her heart broke for him, no one should ever feel that way, especially from a parent.

"I'm sorry Yeosang." Jae started with a sigh,, "She's just so infuriating, I can see the toxicity. I know this is hard for you" she grabbed the hand towel and patted her arm to dry it. He looked up at her then stared at the wall in front of him.

"It is hard. I need out. This was the last straw. I've been practically imprisoned for the past week." His head dropped into his hands. "I'm going to stand up to them. I'm moving out. I have to. I can't live like this."

Jae wanted to respond to his sudden resolve, but she didn't know what to say to confirm his feelings, nor how to comfort him. So she walked over, crouched down, and hugged him. He immediately returned the embrace. She held him, until her legs started to cramp, from her awkward position between the toilet and bathtub. She pulled back, and stood up then softly took his cheeks in her hands, encouraging him to look her in the eyes.

"This won't be easy, but I'm here for you. So are your amazing friends. We want you to be happy." She rubbed her thumb softly over his birthmark. "I like your birthmark." Her thoughtful words shocked him slightly. He was always so self conscious about his birthmark.

"You don't have to lie." he muttered, as he softly grabbed her hand, stopping her movements.

"I'm not. I really like your birthmark. It brings a light to your eyes."

He just shook his head, and dropped her hand.

"Yeosang look here" , she said, turning around. There on her left shoulder blade was a large brown birthmark. It looked almost like a nimbus cloud. She had a crescent moon tattooed above it, and the cloud looked like it was raining stars down.

"Yeosang, when I was young I always got made fun of for my birthmark. I hated it. I hated wearing tank tops, I hated swimming, because I knew everyone would see it." She paused and looked at the ground. "Then I got older, and a friend pointed out that it looked like a cloud. As I learned to love me I decided to enhance its beauty without covering it, so I got the moon and stars tattooed. Our birthmarks, and scars are beautiful. They tell stories, and make us unique." She smiled as she turned, looking at the artwork on her shoulder in the mirror as best as possible.

"Do you have any other tattoo's?" He asked. She nodded.

"I have two others, both incorporate some scars" her smile, and gaze seemed distant.

"Can I see those?" He asked. She smiled at him, and cooked her head to the side.

"No" she responded, as she grabbed her shirt off the counter and slipped it back on. She then walked out of the bathroom, making a sure end to this conversation.

So the rumors he heard of her having tattoos were true. However he doubted that she had a death tarot card tattoo, or that she had a prison tattoo with how cute the one on her shoulder is.

That night Yeosang made plans with the group on how he was going to stand up to his parents. Whom they were sure, were losing their minds being as he had successfully gotten out.

The next day was Saturday, and Jae was working her shift in the back of the shelter. Her text tone went off as she filled another bowl of food. It was an unknown number

-Jae

-What are you doing?

-Want to come to the library. I need your help

-Oh btw it's Wooyoung

-Sure, the one on campus. I'll see you there at 5

-I get off at 4. Can I just meet you at the library at 5"

He left her hanging with no response.

-How did you get my number?

When she arrived at the library on campus she was greeted by a quiet Wooyoung.

"What do you need help with?" She asked, only to be grabbed by her wrist, and dragged into the two story library. She tried pulling free, with no luck. Wooyoung stopped below the balcony on the second story.

"But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Yeosang is the sun" Wooyoung cooed as Yeosang stepped into view from the second story of the library.

"What are you going on about now woo?" Yeosang groaned.

"He speaks: O, speak again, bright angel! for thou art As glorious to this night, being o'er my head As is a winged messenger of heaven"

"How can you memorize part of Romeo and Juliet, and yet you can't remember any of your biology class?"

"Well i'm trying to woo girls. I'll memorize anything for that." Wooyoung winked at Jae, she just rolled her eyes.

"You are crazy if you think standing below someone and quoting Shakespeare will woo them, Wooyoung" she responded, shaking her head.

"Oh, Jae you're here" Yeosang looked over the railing with a smile. "I'd much rather talk to you" , his eyes shining.

"I'm the one that asked you to come over here!" Woo argued.

"She's prettier than you"

"Hey!"

"Can someone just tell me why am I here?" Jae laughed. Wooyoung's smile became mischievous.

"I need your help, removing him from the library" he pointed towards where Yeosang had been. Then groaned as he grabbed her wrist again and started towards the stairs.

"Why?" Jae questioned, "He's an adult, he can stay here as long as he wants."

"You don't get it. We kind of broke into his parents house. "

"You what?" Yeosang yelled, as he walked down the stairs.

"Well, we wanted to make sure you actually would move out. Plus I knew you needed clothes." Wooyoung scratched his head.

"Who's 'we' " Yeosang pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration.

"San and I. We ended up being stuck in your room when your parents came back, and I was lucky and got out your window. But I think San is still under your bed."

"Wooyoung, that is how people end up in jail" Jae's voice quiet, yet stern, as she placed her hand on Wooyoung's shoulder making him face her. "You can't break into people's houses!"

"We didn't really break in. The code was easy to guess" The gravity of the situation, seeming to finally sink in.

"That doesn't make it less illegal" She almost hissed.

"We've got to save San. I guess I'm facing my parents sooner than I thought" Yeosang groaned, as he started to lead them out of the library.

Soon enough they were back where they were the night before, at the small park by Yeosangs parents' house. Yeosang was trying to convince Jae to come with him, as support while wooyoung helped sneak San out.

"Your parents are going to recognize me from last night if I come with you!" Jae argued.

"But I think they will handle you better than him. They think he's a bad influence." Yeosang motioned towards Wooyoung, who was watching the two argue as if it were a drama while leaning against his car.

"And having me come with you, with my purple undercut, and eyebrow piercing will be a good thing? Plus your mom already thinks I'm a heathen because of my motorcycle. I don't think I'm one who should join you."

Jae found herself standing next to Yeosang as he knocked on the front door of his parents house. He was holding onto her wrist tightly. She was sure this is how she was going to die.

#yeosang drabbles #yeosang fluff #yeosang fanfic #yeosang x oc #ateez imagines #ateez fanfic #ateez fluff #ateez angst #yeosang angst

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drshojo · 4 years

Text

The World, My Childhood And My Hero Academia: Vigilantes

Hello friends!

Its Dr. Shojo coming at you with a post that will be divided into three parts!

Part One: The world as we know it!

The world has changed a lot since we last connected. For starters, TOILET BOUND HANAKO KUN HAS NOT ONLY A PHYSICAL RELEASE BUT A GORGEOUS ANIME! And not only that, but MY NEXT LIFE AS A VILLAINESS: ALL ROUTES LEAD TO DOOM! IS GETTING AN ANIME AS WELL! The last time I wrote about Katerina there wasn’t even an official English translation of that long-ass light-novel-title. And now?

A WHOLE ANIME. A BISEXUAL HAREM AWAITS! I am JAZZED!

Do you think it’s my fault? No matter, I’ll take all the credit. All the manga I talk about are getting anime adaptations. I’LL DO MY DUTY AND TALK ABOUT SOME MORE!

But first. Let us address the Covid-19 shaped elephant in the room

I deeply regret that it took a whole-ass pandemic to get me back to writing. In my defense, I bought an iPad and started drawing like 900 kokichi oumas. I was really busy with that. And then I started reading fanfiction. Then that got me thinking about how fanfiction such an interesting look into how people interpret fandom, use it for wish fulfillment and escapism, and good god is everyone OK cause that bulimia fan fic was super detailed....and I am officially on a tangent. Off track. Ahem.

We are all staying inside a whole lot more which means y’all probably need some reading material and Dr. Shojo has your back! Go read “Horimiya”! It’s amazing! Ahhhh, my work here is done! I'm serious, if you’re here for a Shojo rec, that’s it! There's also like 8 million more Otome Isekais to check out now. It’s like they’re multiplying like rabbits..............

As a Doctor, I must advise you to stay inside and read some manga and practice social distancing. Embrace your inner hikikomori.

Allright? All good? Okay now one final disclaimer:

This post is going to be talking about something a little different than usual and I want to start by giving you some context about who Dr. Shojo is in real life.

Part Two: Dr. Shojo Exposed

You see, when I was little I was obsessed with Japanese media. This doesn't surprise you at all I can tell. Probably because I walk around calling myself Dr. Shojo and shout about manga that you should read.

Anyways, the reason why I was obsessed wasn’t because of the big eyes or the spikey hair or the interesting new culture. It was because it tended to have more character development and overarching plotlines than the media I was used to in Canada. Dexter’s Lab, Magic School Bus, pretty much everything I saw on TV was episodic in nature, so imagine how much my mind was blown when I saw Naruto and Card Captor Sakura, heck, even Pokémon had the Indigo Plateau! Here were kids that were learning more and more each day and got to see enemies become friends and vice versa. They lived and grew older just like me. Except they were cooler than me. And had more interesting lives than me. I gotta tell you, I was so sad when I was 12 and Kero didn’t tell me I had latent magical powers. But there was magic in my life and it was the magic of a complex narrative story. And not only that, it had a sense of movement and had cool costumes. I was hooked immediately.

Also, fun fact, at that age I happened to be a complete and utter tomboy! I loved pretending to fight my friends in the playground and was really worried that puberty would ruin my life because being a girl sounded so CUMBERSOME.

Which leads me up to my confession. Before I became Dr. Shojo, I was in fact......Dr. Shonen.

Bleach? Naruto? One Piece? I've read every single chapter there is.

Hundreds of hours of watching fight sequences. Another fun fact, I only got into shojo because my aunt bought me volume 7 and 8 of Fruits Basket thinking “all mangas like the same right? Kids love comics?” It’s a tribute to how episodic western media was back then that she thought buying volume SEVEN and EIGHT was a REASONABLE PLACE TO START READING.

Now you might also say, Hey! Dr Shojo! Cardcaptors was a shojo! And you are right! but back then the anime was marketed to boys over here in the west and they actualy like, edited out episodes that they thought wouldn't interest boys?! Second fun fact, Once when I was in Grade 3 I was told I was not allowed to join a club under the stairs cause I was a girl and it was BOYS ONLY. The point of the club? To talk about how great Cardcaptors was! I Kid you not!

So anyways, your pall Dr. Shojo loves Shonen manga to this day!

The only reason I made this Dr. Shojo blog specifically about shojo is because, being a tomboy with no female friends, reading shojo manga was the first time I really thought about what it meant to be a girl and fall in love. And y i k e s. Shojo manga, like most media, fails miserably most of the time in displaying real world relationships. Or at least, it doesn't prepare you for how disappointing everything can be. When I had my first kiss, I was thinking about how it didn’t feel at all like how I felt reading Zen and Shirayukis kiss in Akagame No Shirayuki Hime. Those were formative years, and shojo was one of the only places I saw romance being talked about for younger audiences. I liked reading romances where no one had any sexual experiences and were figuring out what love meant to them. But let’s shelve this topic for now.

The point is that gender roles are dumb and if you have an open mind there's a world of stories out there for you. Take this time inside to read something you wouldn’t normally. Critically think about the ways that the worlds you see in stories and how you experience the world differ. What are the messages a story is trying to tell you? And why do you like the stories you do? Reflect on how the stories you tell yourself color your view of the world. Even mindless entertainment leaves an impression on us. Anyways.

Whilst you're doing that, I'm going to absolutely lose my hecking mind over the Shonen Jump series MY HERO ACADEMIA: Vigilantes!

WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD!

Part Three: I downloaded the one month free trial of the Shonen Jump app and made you read all that, so I can tell you that today Dr. Shojo is going to rant about a spin-off of a shonen manga

THAT’S RIGHT, OF COURSE I READ HERO ACA AND YES I DID PICK UP THE SPIN OFF SERIES. SHONEN JUMP LETS YOU READ ALL THE NEW CHAPTERS FOR FREE ON THEIR APP. KIDS, IF YOU LIKE SHONEN AND YOU’RE PIRATING ON A SCANLATION SITE STILL GET OUT BECAUSE YOU DON’T NEED TO SEE THOSE WEIRD PLASTIC SURGERY AND DENTISTRY ADDS ANY MORE.

SHONEN IS HERE AND ITS LEGAL AND ITS FREE FOR YOU. GET OFF MANGA FOX OR MANGA ROCK OR WHATEVER THE KIDS ARE USING THESE DAYS.

OK, so by this point in the article you have learned two very important things about me: 1) I love Shonen manga and 2) I read a lot of fanfiction.

Specifically, I read an absolutely biblical amount of My Hero Academia fan fiction and let me tell you, A solid chunk of it is vigilante/ Deadpool / criminal with a heart of gold themed.

So when I saw Hero Aca had a spin off, and it was about vigilantes, I was NOT SURPRISED IN THE SLIGHTEST. Ao3 sure is powerful.

Now, if you will permit me a tangent in a post full of tangents—HOLY CRAP, THERE ARE TOO MANY VIGILANTE AUS. I CAN'T KEEP TRACK OF EM. IT’S THE ISEKAI PROBLEM ALL OVER AGAIN. I GET AN EMAIL A FIC HAS UPDATED AND I’M LIKE IS THIS THE FIC WHERE DEKU HAS AN ABUSIVE MOM OR THE ONE WHERE HE HAS SPLIT PERSONALITY DISORDER OR THE ONE WHERE HE’S VIGILANTES WITH HITOSHI. OH WAIT, nvm, it’s the one where deku has a healing quirk.

OH WAIT WHICH OF THE 6 DEKU WITH HEALING QUIRK VIGILATE AU FICS IS THIS ONE?! ARGH WHY DIDN’T I WRITE A DESCRIPTION IN THE BOOKMARK FOR THIS!

My gripes aside, there's a reason why there's such an abundance of vigilante story telling—

Deadpool made like an absolute buttload of money and people love sass and memes.

People have a desire for a story in which they see themselves. Or, how they think of themselves.They like a story about someone who maybe came from nothing. Someone who has less money, maybe someone who is unlucky and had some bad breaks. Someone who never learned they had magic, never got their Hogwarts letter, never saw Kero, someone who never got that God-level quirk from All Might. And if your on Ao3 They want someone who also has seen a lot of memes and kind of wants taco bell and is also questioning their sexuality a bit?

Enter our new hero VIGILANTE DEKU.

But the cannon can't do this, cause hey, Deku is the chosen one. Albeit, chosen by All Might, He’s got his own thing to do. But how can we still cash in on a vigilante story?

And thus enter our New-New hero KOICHI HAIMAWARI—code name Nice Guy and then later The Crawler. True to his relatable roots. He’s just a dude in an hoodie who can go about as fast as a bike.

First off, I love Koichi. He wants to be a hero and fight crime, but most of the time he has to run away because at the end of the day he's just a dude.

He’s cute but not wildly good-looking, A bit of a nerd but not like an extreme okaku. He’s got a part time job and hates violence.

And this is where Koichi really shines—in every day stuff. He helps out wherever he can. Often, that just means listening to people complain and maybe helping his friends out with whatever they’re going through. He’s the kind of guy who smiles, not because he's especially brave, but because he just takes things one at a time and doesn't sweat the past. I think it’s really telling that he missed getting into hero high-school because he skipped the entrance exam to help someone. He’s the kind of person who lets us experience the superpower of human decency and empathy. And you know what? That’s something the world need desperately.

This theme of human decency is really the driving force of Vigilantes—it’s a manga about how the laws are there for a reason but sometimes they unfairly impact the poor and vulnerable. It's about how a lot of criminals are just people who fell into bad social circles or on bad times. People have the capacity for cruelty and violence but that’s never all they are.

Now, speaking of crime, the entirety of Hero Aca falls into some murky water when it comes to its evil doers. Much of the fandom has a huuuuuge problem with how much the franchise is willing to sweep under the rug in the name of redeeming their baddies. RE: people getting mad about forgiving Endeavor’s child abuse, or Bakugo’s suicide baiting. Or Mineta’s blatant sexual harassment.

But this theme is in Vigilantes even more than it ever was in the main series. To start off with, there’s this guy who tries to rape Pop Step early on, and the later he later winds up befriending everybody. It becomes a running gag that each new villain winds up befriending the other villain guys and then they all open a cat café together.

Using jobs as a way to lift people out of lives of crime is great and all but in the story there is no nuance or consequences for past wrong and well.....it feels very weird. It's like Vigilantes plays at having an opinion about moral ambiguity and the complexity of human existence and then just.......lets everyone get along because who has time to get into all that. Make of that what you will but it sits weird for me personally.

Anyway, let's move on and talk about POP STEP our main girl!

I love pop stars and I love vigilantes and a guerrilla performer is defiantly a character I could get behind. And I think they do a good job with Pop. She is actually kind of shy, but has this secret edgy persona she puts on when she performs. She is every girl on tumbler in the early 2000s. I also looooove that they make her not that great a singer. SHE’S GOT PASSION AND CHARISMA and maybe not born talent but like why should that stop you! Talent can be earned through practice and this is a great lesson to show people.

Unfortunately, Pop is also a great example of everything wrong with romance in Shonen.

It’s established early on that Pop loves Koichi because she is the girl he rescued all those years ago and yada yada yikes we’ve heard this one before. Many times before.

Sure, it's fine that they’ve met before, but gosh am I sick of damsels in distress. It's like she can't love him just because she respects what a great guy he is in her life and in the community at large, no no, she just needs to be rescued on top of that. And LOLOLOL isn't it funny he never noticed she was a girl because she was a child with short hair?! Once he realizes she has boobs now they will for sure fall in love! That’s how love works!

She's just with him all the time—nothing romantic ever happens she just gets a little tsundere.

I am never ever going to believe Koichi likes Pop because he spends like sooooo much time with her and they never have like, a moment. The first time he considers her is when Makoto is like, ‘hey I would love to get together with you, but have you thought about if you are crushing on Pop’. (Also this entire plot point is suspect—she's arbitrarily falling for Koichi cause he.......is the protagonist?)

Say what you will about shojo, they give you the emotional conversations, the moments where you think.....ahhh I can see why she is falling for him. They give you context! Shonen likes to just say HERE’S A GIRL YOUR AGE. YOU CAN DATE LATER WHEN THE ADVENTURE IS DONE.

Just when they might get together, Pop suddenly turns evilllllll. The evilllll beeeees made her eeeevilllll (and more sexy).

*Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*

Because why on earth would they get together if Koichi didn’t get to rescue Pop one more time?

I’m tired. These troupes are tired. I’m sure you are too. HOWEVER! If your still with me, Let’s move into why I'm really writing this post. Let’s get to the part that got me screaming to my friends, who by the way, don’t even care bout Hero Aca….but listened anyways. May you all find nakama like these my friends.

Anyways,

HOLY FUCK ERASERHEAD’S ENTIRE BACK STORY IS IN THIS AROUND CHAPTER 60 AND IT IS WONDERFUL AND ABSOLUTLY HEARTBREAKING AND IS ONE OF THE BEST CHARACTER BACKSTORIES I HAVE EVER SEEN AND IS THE REASON WHY THIS SERIES IS A MUST-READ FOR MAIN SERIES FANS.

AND BY ALMIGHT.

WHY. IS. IT HERE.

I present to you my late night text messages to my friends

ALSO, AIZAWAS TEACHER IS PRINCE?!?!?!

AHEM, so as you can see, I kinda lost my shit.

And now, I would like to formally defend my claim that DESPITE HOW AMAZING IT WAS, ERASERHEAD’S BACKSTORY HAD NO BUISSNESS BEING IN THE VIGILANTES SPIN-OFF MANGA.

Eraserhead, aka Aizawa Shouta, is a side character who is working with the police on some crime stuff. He is not a main cast member in this spin off. He’s a guest character that fans of the main series will be like OH COOL. GRUMPY CAT MAN LIKES CATS ON HIS OFF HOURS TOO. LOVE THAT FOR HIM.

So, my imagine my absolute surprise when Aizawa runs into Koichi and the following happens:

It starts to rain, so, like in any good manga, this means some great FORCED BONDING TIME

Except no. It doesn't because rather than start talking, Aizawa JUST STARTS REMEMBERING—ABSOLUTLY SILENTLY TO HIS OWN PRIVETE SELF—HIS ENTIRE TRAGIC BACKSTORY.

AND THIS GOES ON FOR CHAPTERS.

THIS GOES ON LONGER THEN ARC ONE IT FEELS LIKE.

I LOVE IT, BUT KOICHI IS ABOUT TO JOIN ATSUSHI NAKAJIMA IN THE DUBIOUS CATEGORY OF “PROTAGONISTS THE SERIES FORGOT ABOUT IN LIEU OF COOLER SIDE CHARACTERS”.

AND LO IT HAS NO BEARING ON THE REST OF THE PLOT, CHARACTERS, OR STORY

What the ever-loving-just WHY?

WHY?

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?

SURE, IT’S A COOL TIE-IN.

YES, OF COURSE I LOVED IT. I SHIP ERASER MIC, I DREW THIS FOR HECK’S SAKE:

AND YET I AM ANGRY.

I AM ANGRY BECAUSE MY FRIDAY WAS RUINED BECAUSE VIGILATES SUCKER PUNCHED ME WITH AN AMAZING STORY THAT REALLY WASN’T PLOT RELEVANT AND PROBABLY SHOULDN’T HAVE BEEN THERE.

IS THIS WHY THEY TOOK LIKE NEXT-TO-NO CARE WITH POPS ARC?!?

I mean its ongoing, so it’s too early to say but—

In conclusion—

Excuse me one more,

AIZAWA WAS TAUGHT BY PRINCE!?!??!?!?!?!? PURPLE RAIN PRINCE!?!??!?!?!? WHAT!??!?!?!

It’s so ABSURD that I HAD TO WRITE SOMETHING ABOUT IT. I HAD TO WRITE PARAGRAPHS TO JUSTIFY YELLING ABOUT THIS ONE THING. WHAT THE ABSOLUTE—

Ahem,

Anyways, I hope you liked this weird rant/personal-story/random-diatribe in three parts.

If you’re reading this, thank you, stay safe, and I’ll be back with more shojo manga next time.

Ciao!

Dr. Shojo

(aka Dr. Shonen)

#my hero academia vigilantes #koichi haimawari #pop step #my hero academia #erasermic #Cardcaptors #Shojo manga #Shonen Manga #Dr Shojo #read Horimiya

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marshmallowprotection · 4 years

Note

Damn, sorry to send yet another ask; also, thank you for your response to my last one. Writing out my feelings as well as reading your response did help me calm down ^^

But there's... there's another thing, and I hope you don't mind this topic, it's kinda heavy. If it's too much, you can go ahead and ignore this.

Erm... self harm warning? Ha...

That was the thing. Is the thing. That I started doing due to that friendship. I think it was curiosity more than anything.

...I don't have depression. Anxiety, yes, and sometimes I get frustrated at myself/my disorder, but not depression. I'm not suicidal either. Sometimes I hurt myself when I'm stressed or anxious, sometimes I do it just because... I need to. I need to and I like it and no one tells me why it's wrong. Why is it wrong?? I honestly don't understand. I'm careful; scratching and biting doesnt cause anything severe... and I'm careful otherwise. I'm not hurting anyone else. I'm not depressed. I'm not suicidal. I just like it and it- it... I'm such a freak, ugh, but I can't help the fact that I like it.

I don't do it all the time, it's kind of an off-and-on thing. Just whenever I have the urge.

And my mom... maybe at some point I might've considered telling her, but now I know that I never will. She's made some comments recently about cutters that... they aren't rude or anything, they just show that she'll never understand me. And I don't want to risk emotionally hurting her because she won't understand.

...why is it wrong? No one can answer me. All that comes out of it is relief, even if it isn't exactly the best means. So what's wrong with it?

I've told a number of my friends, actually, and I can tell they don't know what to do. I have one friend who occasionally asks me how I'm doing in regards to that, but I can tell they just... are lost. Don't want to deal with it because they don't know what to do.

I don't want to be stopped. But... maybe if someone could understand me for once and tell me why it's wrong, maybe that person would be able to convince me...

The only thing that stops me before I do it (besides lacking energy/a true desire to do it)... Ugh, this is going to sound so pathetic. Relying on someone who doesn't even exist. But it's Saeyoung... sometimes just imagining his face gives me pause; I hesitate.

But he's not real. Even if he was, who's to say he'd be able to give me an answer?

Maybe I'll never find anyone who can convince me. That's... that's fine. I don't want to be stopped. I only know destructive means of releasing anger, and tearing paper doesn't work that well. Biting my hand, however, brings immediate calm.

I did it right in front of my mom out of habit during an argument which was stressing me out. Immediate relief. She didn't even realize what I was doing.

[417]

TW: Self-Harm, Cutting, Depression, Anxiety

Self-Harm is a dangerous thing to pick up. It doesn’t just mean cutting. It means that you could deny yourself things or bite yourself or crawl at your skin. It’s not something to feel ashamed of or feel guilty about because feelings are very hard to deal with in a healthy way when you don’t have a safe space or people that you can reach out to that can show you better ways to cope with your pain and depression. So, I hope that you know that you’re not a bad person and that it will get better in your life.

This is something that is going to take some time to work on. You’re not hurting anyone but yourself, dear. Nobody deserves to suffer or feel horrible. I’m sorry that you’ve been hurting and that nobody has been able to gently guide you and show you that life can be worth living when you know where to start to help yourself feel better again. One doesn’t have to have depression per se to have struggles with self-harm, either.

I’m sorry that you don’t feel safe enough to open up to your family about this, or your friends. Self-harm is addictive, and it’s very hard to stop once you’ve had the time to start it. It’s harmful to you. Do you deserve to be hurt? No. You don’t. Nobody does. You’re looking for something to help you feel something other than numbness, and yes, pain is a feeling that one can have but it’s not the feeling that you need.

I don’t want to scold you or shame you, so I hope that my tone is coming across gently because I do worry about you! I worry about anyone that is struggling with so much pain in their heart on their own. I know how hard that is. The answer that you’re looking for is for someone to tell you that you matter, that your life matters, that your existence matters. It does. I promise you that it does mean something to many people.

You can’t wait for someone to tell you that all the time, but I understand that people want to hear it from the ones that they love the most. There’s no right thing to tell you other than that I hope that you know that you can find better ways to cope with your pain. It’s harmful because it isn’t helping you sort out your feelings. It’s just hurting you in more ways than you’re able to see.

If you would like to know better ways to cope with self-harm, I can direct you to some better coping mechanisms and references that you can check out. I’ve had many people tell me that biting into lemons or drinking something really tart can jolt you out of feeling numb. That’s one of the major things with self-harm, trying to feel something that isn’t numbness. My fiance stands by submerging your face in ice water for a few seconds to deal with his urges. He’s a few years into his recovery, so I trust him with that theory.

There are other ways to be mindful and help yourself. I promise. If you want to talk more, I’m always here and I’m always willing to listen to whatever you have to say. If you just need a void to scream into, just let it out. Your mother may not understand, but if you’re old enough, you can speak to your doctor about getting someone to talk to about this. I think 16 is the minimum age or that in many of the states.

Now, for the other half of what you said. Don’t feel ashamed for coping with a character. In many cases, that’s the only outlet that many young people have to hold onto you. The only reason that I, for example, was able to deal with what happened to me throughout my childhood and recently, my adulthood, was the fact that I could clutch onto a character to feel better. I still do it. I close my eyes and imagine that comfort character reassuring me. It’s not silly, it’s not wrong, and if it helps you, don’t let anyone make you feel bad.

I’m so very self-insert and OC positive because I know how important it is for people to cope with their pains and woes. Sometimes, you just want to flirt with a cute character, or you want to be cherished, and you find that in a character. I think that’s sweet. Our brains don’t go “fictional” or “real”, if you love something or someone, that love is tried, true, and real. You love him. That’s real, and he would want you to be happy and taken care of.

That’s real. Saeyoung wants you to be happy and wants you to be able to live your life. He’s always willing to listen if you need to write to him. I do that at times, just writing out how I feel and how I know Saeran would talk to me back about it. They empathize and understand your pain. They would want you to feel okay but they would never shame you for hurting. Nobody should. I hope that you can feel better in the future and that you always remember that things will be okay.

Fight for yourself and for your happiness, easier said than done, but I believe in you! I actually wrote a writing trade for someone who has similar struggles if you would like to read that with Saeyoung.

#tw self harm #tw cutting #tw depression #tw anxiety #tw self blame #417 anon #ask #mod kait

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skyler10fic · 4 years

Note

Hi! Do you have any advice for someone who's recently realized they're on the ace spectrum but have nosy, opinionated, unsupportive family members? I'm constantly bombarded with the typical "why don't you ever date, you're not getting any younger, you need to find a guy, settle down, give me some grandkids before it's too late" lectures & I don't know how to talk to my parents about this cause they're (I hate to say it cause I love my parents..but) bigoted when it comes to the LGBT community.

Yeah, looong before I ever brought up being ace, I just told them no. No, I won't be getting married. No, I won't be having kids. I don't need a guy. Not interested. If that's all you want for me, find new dreams. I had it a little easier in that my mom is a doctor and they care a lot more about me being successful in my career, but it was a 10 year process to get them to stop saying "when you get married." By 30 or 40, they will give up. Be more stubborn than they are. Kind, but firm.

You just have to go out there and live an undeniably amazing life. That doesn't mean you are always happy or healthy. I have mental illnesses too. But I don't let my singleness be one of them. I am just as capable of doing anything my married sister does and more. I make my own money, live alone, do my own taxes... Whatever your thing is that is your best adult life, don't wait. Being single doesn't make you less mature or less capable.

Being ace doesn't mean you have to go it alone, of course. You can have roommates or platonic partners or romantic partners or even do the whole kids and marriage thing! It's about attraction, not behavior. But for me, being aro ace is also tied in with being uninterested in dating and committed partners. I am free to do whatever I want. If your family doesn't see that freedom, it hurts, but it's probably because they have never seen it.

We're fed this lie that in order to be happy, we have to have romance and sex. Even aro/ace-coded fictional characters are immediately "shipped" with someone, even if it's a stretch. We all love the happily ever after that involves finding "true love." But we also need stories for people like us, where the truest love is not romantic or sexual, but love for ourselves and friends and family and communities. We can love in big ways, without the distractions of romance and sex. We can be there for people and show up when our friends need us and contribute time and energy to worthy causes our married parent friends can't.

There's huge advantages to intentional singleness, but you have to be the pioneer sometimes, the representation not seen before, the light showing the way.

I was lucky that I have a single aunt and my mom's best friend who is basically my aunt. They have both lived amazing lives of adventure and success and happiness, they have explored their talents and had great relationships with friends and family and neighbors, and they have done it all without ever "needing" a romantic partner.

Yes, loneliness is real. Some days we're like Jo March in the most recent Little Women. We are so desperate for love that we'd sacrifice ourselves to BE loved, even if we don't return it. Even if we can't really reciprocate in that way. But in the end, we are happiest with people who can love us for who we are and don't pressure us to be someone we're not. Who don't want anything more from us than what we can give.

The name of the game is boundaries. Educate them, list off people they respect who are single and crushing it, don't let yourself be infantilized, but above all, be secure in your identity. If a man or woman comes along who proves themselves worth of your affections, you have an open heart and mind. But until then, you are just fine with your friends and family and community around you, and don't have the time to worry about such things. That's most attractive, anyway. Someone who isn't desperate but knows who she is. So let them come and see you shine, but don't ever listen when they tell you that you NEED a man. If you decide want one, you can have one of course, it won't make you less yourself or less aro/ace. There is a whole spectrum, after all, and since it's defined by attraction being rare, you may find yourself in exactly the kind of relationship they want for you. But if you don't want that, you don't need it. Silly concept. We need friends and family and belonging. We need people, yes. We don't need romance or sex.

Unfortunately that can take some convincing because we've all been marketed to for so long, raised to think we're nothing without a man by our side no matter our accomplishments. That the fairy tale must end in a kiss. And those are beautiful. It's time we wrote new stories, lived new stories. Showed the world another way.

What you have is a gift. You don't have to label it aloud to them if you don't want to. You don't have to come out if it's not safe. You don't have to explain yourself at all. You are allowed to rule your own life and know your own mind and write your own destiny. You are the one who has to live it. If they want grandchildren that bad, there are plenty of ways to engage with kids in their community who need grandparents. You don't owe them anything. Not even your labels, if you don't want to share them. It's enough that you know who you are and what you want.

This goes for straight people, too, btw. Even if you experience attraction, you don't have to want it. You don't have to date or marry or have grandkids. You can be fulfilled and happy single. It's a very popular choice now that women don't have to marry for financial support and can have jobs ourselves. You can live your life on your own terms and your family will learn to adapt.

#aro ace #ace spec #asexuality #aromantic #singleness #adulthood

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angry-fishy8 · 7 years

Text

A story that'll never be published

I remember that night. We talked till the sun came up and you kissed me. Not like I was wanting or the kind you were hoping, but I think that's when we finally learned that there was something. I don't think I wanted to admit it, and neither did you, so we kind of just forgot about that night. I mean why would we? I was plain and you were Mr. Fourteen. I gave up on closing myself because you told me to open up. God, looking at it, we were so stupid. But I'm not saying that being angry. I'm saying that with a huge smile on my face." +

I don't remember when I fell asleep but I woke up around three. Tyler still wasn't there so it made me worried. Are you really that mad at me? I just wanted to sleep but my brain wouldn't shut off. +

I grabbed one of Tyler's hoodies and grabbed a blanket. I didn't have an exact place where I wanted to go, but I didn't want to be in the hotel right now. I know I could've just went to talk to Brooklynn, but she'd just tell me off. +

When I had gone outside, the crisp fall air hit my legs before anywhere else. I guess shorts were a mistake. +

While I was walking I was replaying everything that happened today. Why would Tyler be so mad just because he pushed me away? I mean I guess in hind sight what I said after didn't really help. +

"I promised I wouldn't hurt you and that wasn't enough!" +

"It was!" I yelled. +

"Are you sure? Because everyone thinks that I'm the one trying." +

"What am I supposed to do, I told you I didn't want to ruin our friendship! Here we are! And here you are getting ready to leave." I grab his coat and threw it at him. "Do it, like everyone else." +

"Kate, this is just you worrying." he said calmingly. +

"GO! I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!" +

"Is that what you really want?" +

"You're gonna do it anyways! Might as well let me do it on my terms." I cried. "Because that's what you want right? To leave? It's obvious, you've wanted that for a while." I looked away while he stepped closer. "Leave." +

He stood there for a moment. +

"I really did love you." +

I could feel everything crumble. After a while of not responding, he left. And everything I had to offer did too. +

I sat down at the park where Mrs. K and us talked. I just sat staring at the stars waiting for something to happen. +

"Kate, sweetie, it's time for school." I heard my mom sit on the opposite side of my bed. "You've been here all weekend." +

I didn't pull the covers from my head but I'd been awake the entire night. +

"Bumblebee." I whispered. +

"Are you sure?" She put her hand on my leg rubbing it. "It's the last one for the semester." +

"Yes please." +

"I'll call the school and tell them you've been sick all weekend. You have your concert tonight though." She kissed my head. "Don't let this bring you down." +

Brooklynn: You left me alone all weekend and now? +

Kate: We broke up. +

She didn't reply. And I stayed awake just watching my wall. That was enough. +

There was a shooting star and that's what pulled me from my thoughts. I laughed. +

Story continues below

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"You weren't even that special." I whispered. +

"There'll be a day you can say you're okay and mean it." I sang. Secret for the mad by Dodie was the one thing that helped me when I was down. +

"I promise you, it'll all make sense again." +

"That's the song you want to sing for Senior Night?" Mrs. K asked. +

"Why not?" I laughed. +

"It just doesn't seem like you, I mean it fits your vocal tone beautifully, and the vibrato in your voice is lovely with it." +

"But?" +

"Sweetie." She patted my arm, "We can talk if you want." +

"I know." I fake smiled. "I think when I'm fully ready, you'll be the first person I'll talk to you. I promise." +

"Alright then, I'll remember that." she smiled. "How's college searching?" +

"I found a great culinary arts school." +

"Culinary Arts? Like your father?" +

"Through everything he put me through, our best memories are cooking." I played with my ring finger. "It's all I know." +

"And music sweetie." +

"Yeah, but I'll never be good enough for that," +

"I thought the same thing once. And here I am" +

I smiled. That was the best memory between us. I mean there are a million great memories, but the one on one moments are the best. +

"Kate?" I heard Tyler say. +

I covered up in the blanket more as he sat by me. +

"What are you doing here?" +

"I couldn't sleep." I said looking up at the stars. "Never seems to shut off when I want it to." +

"Same." He whispered. +

"I think I owe you an apology." +

"For?" +

"I'm not sure." +

"Then don't" he said sweetly. "Don't do that to yourself. If you said sorry for every time I did something wrong, then you'll never trust me." +

"But what did you do?" +

"What did you do?" +

"I let you leave and didn't talk it out with you." +

He laughed. "I didn't want you to feel obligated to. If you need space that's what I'm more than happy to give you." +

"Wait." +

"Yes that's why I left." he wrapped his hands around his legs. "What were you thinking about that couldn't make you sleep." +

I laughed. "Seeing Mrs. K today and talking about my fidget just made some unhappy memories pop up." +

"Like Alec?" +

"Yeah." He didn't respond so I pushed myself. "Is there anything you really want to know about my past?" +

He looked up at me but I didn't turn towards him. +

"Uhm no not really." +

"Come on, I won't lie." +

"Okay. Why do you play with your ring finger?" +

"Ahh the basics." I laughed, "I caught it when I first met Alec. He used to comment on how I would be a "beautiful bride". It was basically his way of trying to have me open up. Our friends would call him future husband and after a while we'd laugh about it. The first time he'd ever held my hand, he grabbed my hand and played with my ring finger." I started to rub it. "For Christmas, he bought me a little ring to put on it so I had something to play with. It was the first time he'd shown that he liked me. I always thought it was a game with him." +

Story continues below

"So you didn't trust him when you first met him?" +

"No," I looked at the stars, "I didn't really like trusting guys." +

"Why?" +

"My dad." I grinned, "How cliché? The one guy who should give me unconditional love and make me think I'm really beautiful, actually made me think the opposite." +

"Did he ever-" +

"No, all emotional trauma. If I wore something tight fitting, he'd call me too fat. If I wore makeup it was too much. If I was asked out, he'd ask who'd ask me out. After a while I started to wear long sleeved shirts and pants every day. Even in the summer. Then my sophomore year, I didn't eat, and he'd tell me off. Asking why am I taking the easy way out. How is starving yourself to a certain image the easy way out? I had started to get so bad, I fainted in certain times. Basically anything he saw wrong with me, I saw wrong with myself times ten." +

"Oh." Was his only response. +

"Next question?" +

"Uhm, do you ever think you could fall in love again?" +

My heart stopped. "Sometimes I wonder that myself. But then I ask am I really capable of it?" +

"What do you mean?" +

"Like, I love seeing people in love. It's beautiful. Not just the honeymoon stage, but when you see a couple and know, yeah they fight, but they choose to give each other space, to think about if the fight was important or not. Then they pretend it didn't happen or they move passed it. It makes them stronger. It's like the strongest friendship, but more. I see that and I think, am I capable of that?" +

"And?" +

"I mean that's what we did." I didn't look at him but I saw from the corner of my eye that his mouth slightly opened. "I'm not saying I'm in love with you, but I'm also not saying I wouldn't be able to." +

"With me?" +

"With anyone." His jaw clenched. "The idea of opening up to someone scares me." I continued. "Think of it, if the men who are supposed to love you, support you, treat you with respect and dignity, if they chose to do the opposite, could you learn to love or even fathom the idea of it?" +

"I have." It was his turn. "My mom, we have a strange relationship, it's nothing like you and your dad, but it's close. She blamed me for my sister getting sick, when we first found out, and when I wanted to come and listen to what the doctors had to say, she'd just tell me no. She'd blame me for it." +

"I'm so sorry.." +

"Well after awhile I gave up on our relationship, how can you blame someone who had no iea what was going on?" +

"You can't." +

"But she did." his voice broke. "I think that's why I have such a strange relationship with girls, "Jennifers and Carries" they make it easy. Because I can shut it down. I can just refuse to get close to them, and they'll take a hint. Other than my sister, I've never had a strong connection with woman." +

"So you're scared." I said silently. "Of being hurt again. Of trying to jump and not knowing if that person is going to catch you or just leave." +

We didn't say anything for a while. But I took his hand. It wasn't in the romantic sense. I wanted him to know I'm willing to catch him if he was willing to do the same. Neither of us knew how to connect with someone of the opposite sex, and just grabbing his hand, it was the first step. +

"Together," I started. "I want us to take baby steps together." +

"In a romantic way?" +

I laughed, "No bozo, in a platonic way. Neither you nor I have any real sense on trust. you preach to me about dating but you've yet to notice we're in the same boat." I nudged him. "So why not take the same ride and see where we go." +

"As friends?" +

"As friends." +

"And if one day, one of us decides we want something more?" he squeezed my hand but he couldn't tell he was squeezing my heart too. +

"Then the other one has to be just as ready." I looked at him. "Deal?" +

"Is this your idea of asking me out in the future?" +

"No." I smiled noticing he was leaning in closer. "Because neither of us know if this'll work." +

"I have a pretty good idea that it will." He said inches from my face. Just before I could pull away he kissed me on the forehead. "When you're ready." He whispered. +

We sat there for a moment looking at each other and for a moment I could feel every negative thought drift away. He smiled and it made me smile just as wide. +

"There you are!" I heard a female voice squeal and I jumped away from him. "Tyler you forgot your key in my car." +

"Oh uhm thanks Lacey." He coughed. +

"Who's this?" we asked in unison. +

"Oh Lacey this is Kate the friend I told you about, Kate this is Lacey, I met her in a bar on my walk." +

And all the bad thoughts were back but they weren't about me. No they were about Lacey and Tyler. He looked at me and under the blankets squeezed my hand. +

"Pleasure meeting you Lacey." I smile letting go of Tyler's hand and getting up, "I guess you two should continue getting to know each other." +

"Are you his girlfriend?" The young blonde asked. +

"No." Tyler said before I could, "We're just friends." +

"Then why is she wearing a hoodie with your last name?" She pointed her hand at me. +

"Believe it or not friends share clothes." I laugh taking it off and handing it to her. "Believe me when I say, if he remembered your name after a while, you've got no threat from me. I'm just a friend." I strained. "Anyways, I need to pack, I've gotta get back to Pueblo tomorrow." +

Tyler stood up and grabbed my hand, "But we weren't supposed to go back till Monday." +

"Silly me, I forgot I put in a three day weekend." I smiled. "Again it was nice meeting you Lacey, you're in great hands with him." +

And I walked back to the hotel without my blanket, his hoodie, or a clear mind. +

"Stupid." I whispered to myself

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awed-frog · 7 years

Note

When I was reading the texts in Mary's phone, at first I thought that Dean was the one who said "I'm sorry you found out this way" and I instantly chocked in my coffee bc I thought he told her about how shitty his childhood was with Jhon as his father I almost died literally, I drowning in coffee

Congrats on not dying! Seriously, with the levels of both crack and pain this show manages to dish out almost every week, is a damn miracle any of us are still alive.

That is actually a conversation I’m very much looking forward to, but I’m expected to be disappointed. With everything that’s happened, the memory of John as this pure, sweet thing trying to coax baby Dean back to sleep is probably the one good thing Mary can still hold on to, and neither Dean nor Sam are about to take it from her. It’s actually weird, if you think about it - how in her book, she’s probably the freak there - the woman who couldn’t cook and wasn’t satisfied with motherhood and even John, dark-haired and goofy and sweet, was not enough -

(sorry, got distracted for a second)

(hang on)

(goddammit, why are there were so many pictures of Matt out there? it’s bloody unfair - people are trying to get some work done and all)

- the last survivor of a long line of hunters, the one who’d check on her baby boy before slipping out of the house with a duffel full of weapons. After all those years thinking John was the problem in that marriage - his PTSD, his alcoholism, his bouts of rage, his need for control and obedience at all costs - it’s beyond whatever to have to rethink all that - to realize that probably all those fights they were having - yeah, it was the opposite way around.

(And by ‘whatever’ I mean, I’m loving it so so much.)

So, I don’t know - if I were Mary, I’d probably want to know - I would have talked to anyone, read anything - than again, maybe it’s me, or maybe all fictional characters are by necessity a bit oblivious and embarrassingly incurious, because I don’t think Mary actually knows all that much. Maybe she simply can’t bear to, because she can see well enough (anyone could) how damaged and broken her sons are, and as to why they got that way - there are two kinds of people, right? Some they fear what they can imagine; others pretend everything is fine if they just don’t know.

As for Dean - underneath it all, it must be agony, because he’s seen so many versions of his mom, right? He’s met her in the past, and in Heaven, and in hallucinations and nightmares and fever dreams, and now she’s here, he’s not about to scare her away, especially considering she seems to be doing a fine job keeping her distance all by herself. Also, I like to think both Sam and Dean sort of made their peace with John at this point. It will never be right, the way they were raised, but there comes a moment in your life when you have to accept that people are flawed, and your parents probably did the best they could. And even if they didn’t, how could their lives possibly be any better if they stay mad at someone who’s long since dead? Both of them have plenty enough to worry about without bringing up anything John did to them, after all.

Still - as I said, I admit I was hoping for a lot more family talk this season. I’m a sucker for young!Dean and young!Sam, and what with Mary being back, I thought - yeah. Never mind. They’re doing a fine job ripping our hearts off ours chests as it is.

#ask #john winchester #mary winchester #spn season 12 #matt cohen #i'd apologize for that #but well #*goes full maui*#YOU'RE WELCOME

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