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Item No: 183
Item Name: Farewell to Ursa Draft Press Release
Description: Press release from PRSC responding to the orders from the council to remove the 12ft Ursa the Bear sculpture from the Bear Pit
Box Name: PRSC EPHEMERA May 2019 >
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B E A R P I T 🐻 Here's a little fun fact for your Sunday.... do you know about the Bear Pit of Redburn and the origins of Belfast Zoo? Local legend tells how Robert Dunville's pet bear Bruno was once kept in this small quarry. Bruno was a North American black bear with a tame nature and was well known for his tricks. Stories tell how Bruno learnt to sit on some of the chain by which he was tethered so that it looked shorter than it was. If he was teased by anyone, he would leap out to the full length of the chain to seek his revenge. By 1934, after the death of Robert, the estate was unable to continue looking after the animals. At this time Belfast Zoo opened and Robert's private zoo was donated to them to start their collection. #bearpit #bearpits #bear #bears #bearsofinstagram #bearstagram #bears🐻 #blackbear #blackbears #redburn #redburncountrypark #holywood #belfast #northernireland #discoverni #visitbelfast #norniron #ourweecountry #locallegend #locallegends #talltales #funfact #funfactsunday #visitbelfast #visitnorthernireland #northdown #ulstersnapper #viewruiner #selfie #memyselfandi #forestphotography (at Redburn Country Park) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cntf8z2DFKR/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
#bearpit#bearpits#bear#bears#bearsofinstagram#bearstagram#bears🐻#blackbear#blackbears#redburn#redburncountrypark#holywood#belfast#northernireland#discoverni#visitbelfast#norniron#ourweecountry#locallegend#locallegends#talltales#funfact#funfactsunday#visitnorthernireland#northdown#ulstersnapper#viewruiner#selfie#memyselfandi#forestphotography
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Jazzul oh Jazzul - video
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just saw somebody say "category 5 blorbo moment" in regards to soemthing that happened in mha and man im gonna steal that when we get winds and jaime just acts like a nutcase in front of LSH before brienne has to save his ass then they kiss
#or like#jaimes nah gonna leave her on read throw the letter in the fire moment#or the whole bearpit scene#or nah i dont throw children from windows to improve their health#like category 5 blorbo moment what a great line#jaime lannister
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Leaving Berlin to Italy - Trieste or a small town somewhere?
Leaving Berlin to Italy – Trieste or a small town somewhere?
Rosenthaler Platz gegenüber von Sanct Oberholtz
I just went to the main train station to ask a few more questions and precisely figure out where to park the bicycle over night to find it upon arriving with my luggage on a bus, Turns out the train i had scheduled has a bomb threat and is canceled ( uh hum, glad I went there today) so the woman agent printed out a new starting point and time and…
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#ART#bearpit karaoke#Berlin#bicycles#Blue Heron#Farrhad Doctor Pohlstr. Berlin#freakinmacstore#Germany#intuition#Mitte#Nature#Potsdamer Platz Berlin#Rosenthaler Platz#train transport#Travel
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so i have seen two charity shops this week do displays and. listen. so one of them was the cats' protection society charity shop in bishopstown that did this
fun, yes? they're frightening papier mâché cat headed mannequins having a christmas party. there is alcohol and crackers. one of the cats has kicked off their shoes to better dance. they have consumed the meat of several fish leaving only the skeletons behind. one of the cats is wearing a tuxedo
i not only understand the narrative but why they have done this. its a cat charity. the cats are having a party
now, on the other hand, st peter's hospice by the bearpit have decided to do this
whats that about. did timmy chalet ask you to do this
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Red Ronnet raised his lantern. "I wished to see where the bear danced with the maiden not-so-fair." His beard shone in the light as if it were afire. Jaime could smell wine on his breath. "Is it true the wench fought naked?"
curious as to what version of this story Ronnet heard that made him think, you know what the guy who jumped into a bearpit to protect Brienne would really appreciate? me insulting her and recounting the time I totally humiliated her
???
don't know that I get the thought process there dude
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Could you expand on how Jaime will be removed from the King’s guard and what will happen when he is?
yes sort of!
So I think that Cersei will remove him, most likely after hearing via Qyburn/RonCon that Jaime and Brienne have a bit of a thing going on - I can’t find the post, but others observed a few years ago that RonCon is headed back to KL, and in conversation with Cersei may mention how he came about the big old bruise on his face. Qybs can meanwhile testify to the whole romcom airport dash that is Jaime’s race back to the bearpit. And I think someone mentioned Randyll Tarly might even have something to contribute here but I can’t remember what it is so.
Anyway all of this taken together, I think Cersei is going to for once leap to the correct conclusion - that JB are going canon - and decide Jaime can no longer be trusted, and so removes him from the KG. The pretext may be that she just states he’s dead already, it may be that Loras is proven to be alive after all and so there’s still a spot requires for undead Gregor, or it may be she just uses the Barristan Precedent and gets rid. Either way, Cersei believes she’d know when Jaime has died, so it won’t be a matter of her fearing him dead. She’s going to remove him because she considers him a traitor now.
As for where that sees Jaime’s arc turning - it’s a lot of internal stuff like I mentioned before, as Jaime’s arc is quite an inward looking one:
Firstly, it reconfigures his relationship with Tommen: Tommen is no longer the king he must serve but purely his son, and Jaime’s next steps in that relationship must be made as a father, not a glorified guard.
Secondly, it ends his “marriage” to Cersei (see prev post), and forces him to finally realise himself as an independent autonomous human being who must shape his own destiny (nice job jam you’re only 34)
Third, it reframes the legacy he’s pursuing - is he looking for glory to fill the white book with, or is he looking to do what’s right whether it’s on the record or no. It’s Jaime having to embrace his legacy as an individual rather than as a cog in an institution he doesn’t believe in
Fourth - I know this sounds like shipper talk but I honestly think the possibility remains on the table - it frees him up for marriage lol. Jaime has previously reflected that marriage is out of the question for him as a member of the KG, whether he wanted it or no. But as his romance with Brienne is realised there is no way someone like Jaime, who has been raised in a society that has marriage on the mind pretty much constantly, is not going to think: hey, I’m a single lord, she’s a single lady, we’re in love and I don’t want to dishonour her - therefore??? Like it’s not GOT, JB wouldn’t even have the language to describe an ONS/casual fling. Courtship and marriage go absolutely hand in hand in their world, that’s why Jaime couldn’t get marriage out of his mind w Cersei, against all logic and reason. So if his vow of perpetual bachelorhood is removed - yeah go figure
Regardless of how it all comes to pass, I basically just think it’s an absolute given that 1) Cersei will figure Jaime for a traitor and remove him from the KG, 2) Jaime will have an identity crisis. GRRM may have already written it….
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All right, I did a post yesterday about the Cowgate incident of 2003, which started because I read the disappointing news that the site of the incident will be closed to the public when I'm in Edinburgh this summer, and I literally read it during a brief period of being awake in the middle of a fever dream. And then of course I made a post about it, because if you wake up in the middle of a fever dream, you always have to post about the real-life incident that most resembles the content of an actual fever dream.
This made me realize it's been a little while since I've actually watched that video, I went through a year or so of re-watching it at least once a week (mainly because it became a go-to re-watch when drunk, particularly near the end of the night when I no longer wanted to focus on anything coherent or longer than a few minutes, personally I'd never want to be at a comedy show while drunk but I do see why they'd do this for a drunk crowd, it appeals to that side of the brain), but I hadn't seen it in six months or so. I thought, I've probably been building this up in my head a bit in the six months of not actually watching it. The idea of Cowgate as a weird drunken fever dream (though one enjoyable thing about it is that besides Adam Hills and the entire audience I'm pretty sure the people involved were sober, as that was sort of the Chocolate Milk Gang's thing, getting their name specifically because they were the only people who didn't get drunk at late-night Edinburgh shows, instead they went for milkshakes across the road) had become a running joke in my mind and sometimes my Tumblr references, but at this point it's more of a symbol than anything else. After writing that post that ran with the joke of it being an iconic violent ritual, I thought it would be fun to spend some of my sick day at home re-watching the actual video, expecting to find that it just looks like relatively expected raucous comedy show shenanigans, not quite as mind-breakingly weird as I remember.
...Guys, it's exactly as I remembered. It's so weird. I've made multiple deep dive Cowgate posts before, but not for at least six months (I think the last time I did it one was for the 20th anniversary, August 26 last year, so almost exactly six months, actually), and I think six months should be long enough to make me allowed to repeat myself on the subject. Because there's almost nothing I haven't said before, but watching it again made me want to say it all again. And I do mean almost - I think I did discover one new detail while watching it between fever dreams yesterday. It's pretty good.
Okay, first of all, here's the video in all its glory:
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I cannot emphasize enough how much the first time I came across this it was 2 AM and I had no context for understanding where they were or what was going on. Since then, I have figured out: it's a show called Late 'n' Live. It takes place on many nights throughout the Edinburgh Festival, at a venue called the Gilded Balloon. The Gilded Balloon is owned by Karen Koren. It burned down in 2002 and was rebuilt nearby, this video is from 2003, in the rebuilt venue on Teviot Place. The Late 'n' Live event runs from around 11:30 PM to around 3:30 AM and consists of a bunch of comedians who come on, sometimes to do their own sets and sometimes to do shit like this, managed by a compere, and after that they bring out a band and it turns into a dance floor. At this time, it was known for being a bearpit with a drunk and rough crowd that sometimes got violent. For several years in the late '90s and early '00s, it was famous compered by Johnny Vegas. It was then compered, throughout the early- and mid-00s, by Daniel Kitson. I mean I think there was some crossover, obviously they didn't just have one compere for an entire month and people besides those two guys did it too, some people had to get some sleep at some point. Anyway, these are all things that I know as a direct result of the rabbit hole I went down after finding this video and needing to understand what the ever loving fuck was going on in it. I actually know a lot more than that about Late 'n' Live, but there isn't time for it all right now. I've watched a four-part BBC Scotland documentary series about the history of Late 'n' Live. I watched a Tim Minchin documentary mainly because I like Tim Minchin but a little bit because it had a lot of the Gilded Balloon in it and that was relevant to my Late 'n' Live research. I have an entire folder on my hard drive called Late 'n' Live and it has too many files in it.
One of them's a gif of David O'Doherty throwing his entire body with abandon onto different things at Late 'n' Live in different years: onto Jason Byrne in 2003, onto the floor in 2005, and onto Daniel Kitson in 2007. All clips I found in entirely different sources and decided they needed to be together.
Anyway. I'm getting off topic. Already. Cowgate. The point is Cowgate. I named the incident Cowgate because that's the name of the neighbourhood where the original Gilded Balloon was, and, you know, it was a cow. A cow and what looked like it had to be some sort of scandal. I think it's very clever.
So here's the thing. After I first found that video, which seemed like a tiny relic of one of many moments of one of many nights on one of many years that this stuff went on, and I set about obsessively looking things up for weeks to try to figure out what they were doing, in the process I came across a second video that also happened to capture the same moment. Amazing stuff.
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The former video was on the Gilded Balloon's YouTube channel, and seemed to have been filmed officially by the venue staff. This latter one was a montage of videos taken throughout the night by an audience member who apparently had whatever people used to film things at gigs in 2003. Wouldn't have been a camera phone back then.
This video shed a bit of light on some of the essential mysteries of Cowgate, but didn't actually answer many, and to be honest it asked more questions than it answered. Obviously, one of the main questions I had about Cowgate was "Where did the cow come from?" I'd wondered whether the Chocolate Milk Gang had somehow procured it, or whether they took something that was already there. Both options would open up a lot more questions, such as where did they get it, and if it wasn't there because they specifically put it there for the purposes of taking it apart, how did they get permission to take it apart?
The longer video suggests that it's the latter. It shows Daniel Kitson earlier in the night, messing around with the cow the way he might if its presence on stage were a surprise to him as well as to the audience.
The other essential question is "Why did they attack it?", and this earlier scene may suggest a possible reason. From the dialogue, it seems that Kitson jumped on top of it because the crowd told him to, and then the crowd keeps shouting other cow-based challenges at him, and he makes fun of them for suggesting challenges that are too easy (jump off it, touch it, etc.). The video then cuts, but it is possible that he challenged the crowd to ask him to do something difficult with it, and they said to tear it apart, and then it escalated. That scene seems to be from the beginning of the night, and we know the actual Cowgate ritual was the last thing that happened in the night, because right after they finish Kitson brings the band out and that occurs after the comedy ends. So it's possible that they could have come up with the challenge at the beginning, spent a few hours sourcing various weapons, and then done this at the end.
That theory of course brings up other questions, like how they decided on the weaponry. And, again, why they were allowed to do that. The answer to that question depends on where the cow came from, which I still don't know. I once spent a week looking up the International Cow Parade because I thought maybe it was part of that, but I don't think so anymore. It has the word Metro on the side of it, and someone in the YouTube comments called it the Metro cow. So it was probably an advertisement, not an art piece. But I wouldn't have thought your allowed to take apart a company's advertising installation. Maybe it was going to be destroyed after the festival anyway? Also, why was there a cow-based Metro advertisement on the floor at a comedy gig anyway?
I'd like to go through the video in further detail, as I've done many times before, but not for six months so I think I'm allowed a new one, and also I've come up with one (1) new fact (theory) so that's worth doing the whole thing again. I've just spent two days sick in bed, please allow me to indulge in this.
- Right at the beginning, the "three chances" thing still confuses me. That line really suggests that this is a challenge, not just a weird stunt, that they are being tested to see if they can do it. Possibly tested by an audience that was told to come up with a more difficult idea for something the comedians could try with a cow.
But what are the paramatres of the challenge? To take the cow apart, sure, but the "three chances" line implies more specific restrictions. Did they try this two other times earlier in the night and weren't able to do it? Perhaps tried it earlier with fewer weapons? Or did "three chances" mean three people are allowed to work on it? Doesn't seem likely, as Kitson jumped in fairly quickly and made it four.
- Adam Hills sounds like he's referencing something with "literally bottle it". I know "bottle it" is a expression that means "fuck it up", but I don't see how that's literal in this case. Was there a bottle involved? What would bottling it mean in this instance? Failing the audience's challenge? I don't even know for sure that it was an audience challenge, that's just a guess based on the beginning. It could be something else entirely.
- The part where John Oliver, Demetri Martin, and David O'Doherty scurry across the stage like squirrels makes me laugh every time. Why are they all bent over? What are they hiding from?
- David O'Doherty appears to be the only person who came out carrying a weapon. In the first shot of the guys attacking the cow, DO'D is hitting it with a hammer that he presumably brought from backstage. The other two are pulling on it with their bare hands. Then, in a detail I find hilarious, Demetri Marin reaches behind him and grabs what appears to be a chisel off the floor. I guess what probably happened is he did bring that with him from backstage, then put it down, and we just see him pick it back up. But the editing makes it look like he's tried pulling the horns, it didn't work, so he turned around and grabbed the nearest tool, like a character in a video game that just finds useful weapons lying around.
- It also makes me laugh that Adam Hills used his rap-based narration to make sexual jokes about the cow, while Kitson puts his hand over his mouth/in the air like a rapper, to show he's totally on board with this gangsta rap thing, but also, they have shit to and it's (presumably) nearly 4 AM, so the actual content of his lyrics is going to be to give useful practical advice on how to get this job done. Because they're not combining the tools, and you really need to use the chisel and hammer together or it'll never work.
I enjoy the way at this point, John Oliver takes just the briefest break from attacking a facsimile cow with his bare hands to look up Kitson, looking quite impressed with his approach to the situation. "Yes, thank you Daniel, finally some helpful ideas instead of just cowfucking jokes, now let's get that chisel over here."
- It can be hard to see in the darkness, but this whole thing is basically a Kitson and Oliver-oriented plan. Kitson shouts at DO'D to "combine the chisel and the hammer". John Oliver then points like he's directing a play, getting DO'D to bring his hammer to the other side.
DO'D does this, but puts the hammer down on the ground over there, instead of combining it with anything. That's when Kitson taps DO'D on the back like a pretend wrestler tagging in, possibly deciding that if he stays on the sidelines rapping all night, they'll never get this done and be allowed to leave. So he pushes DO'D out of the way, and takes his spot next to John Oliver. Then he reaches down and grabs a random chisel off the ground, again like a video game character. Then he reaches over the cow and picks up the hammer that DO'D has discarded (like a video game character), so he is now combining the chisel and the hammer. At the same time, John Oliver has physically taken the first chisel out of Demitri Martin's hand, and starts working on the same end as Kitson. Now they're getting somewhere.
- This is one of those videos that's funny every time if you keep running it back to watch the same eight seconds over but this time focus on a different person. DO'D tries to get in after Kitson straight-up stole his spot, leans in but can't find an opening, gives up and walks all the way around them both to try the other end of the cow because clearly the Kitson and Oliver dream team have this end sewn up.
- Then, there's a curveball: someone with the word CREW on the back of their shirt comes out of absolutely nowhere, and hands John Oliver a lead pipe, like a character fucking Clue(do, depending where you live). Where did this come from? Do most stages have large bits of piping lying around backstage? Was John Oliver supposed to bring it on stage with him but forgot it so they had to run it out to him? Or did those crew people decide that they're not making enough progress, someone had better find a large pipe and bring it on stage and hand it to John Oliver so we can all go home.
I've been writing this post so far while watching the official video - the one off the Gilded Balloon YouTube channel - but I think you get a much better view of this specific part from the way it was captured in the montage by an audience member. It's another part that I find incredibly funny. John Oliver is methodically working away with Demitri Martin's chisel and his own hands. Then someone hands him a large weapon, and he immediately raises it above his head like a sword and starts whacking the thing full tilt. Scares the shit out of Kitson on one side of him and DO'D on the other. They both jump, Demitri Martin just cautiously circles away.
In the words of a John Oliver bit that is long outdated but lives on in our hearts and my DVD collection... whaky stick. Whacky stick!!!
Kitson, after initially jumping, responds by choosing to imitate John's style, and starts raising the hammer over his own head to attack it with full force in the same way. While DO'D literally cowers in the corner:
And Demitri Martin continues to do what he's been doing since John took his tool away, which is to run his hands over the body of a cow like a mechanic sizing up a car. He has contributed almost nothing to this operation. I don't even think Demetri Martin knows how to take cows apart. Too busy turning letters into numbers and stuff.
- After getting over the initial excitement of waving a pipe around wildly, John Oliver employs the more thought-out strategy of using it like a lever, trying to prise it open at the seam. Kitson gets in beside him and starts attacking this same seam, striking the weak spot repeatedly with the hammer. In the background, DO'D and Demetri Martin appear to try jumping on the thing.
This is the strategy they're still employing the moment the cow finally comes apart:
I've observed this from multiple angles, and at first I thought Kitson deserved the most credit for breaking it, but now I think it was mainly John Oliver's work. Definitely a team effort though (or at least a dual effort, not sure how much the other two helped, though to be fair the bigger boys took their tools away). It comes apart at the exact spot where Kitson was hitting it with the hammer, you can see Kitson give it a hard kick, then one more strike, then put his arms up in celebration as this strike breaks it in half. But I'm pretty sure it was John's leverage from behind him that allowed him to split the thing.
- At this point they all contribute to pulling it the rest of the way apart; Kitson and Martin hold the top half while Oliver and DO'D take out the bottom. This is another part I find very funny - the way they're so matter-of-fact about handing it out to the audience. Look at John Oliver and David O'Doherty marching this across the stage like they're workers delivering a coach or something:
- Then the camera shows the cow being crowd surfed. The YouTube comments say: "The Metro cow got smashed in two and crowd surfed over everyone out the back door". In his lyrics, Adam Hills talks about taking it up the Royal Mile. The Royal Mile is the street outside, so all this suggests that they continued to take the cow outside and down the street. Was that part of the challenge? Was the initial plan to take the thing apart and then have it carried through the streets of Edinburgh? How far did this cow go?
- I have so far compared them to video game characters, board game characters, tag-team pretend wrestlers, a mechanic, and delivery workers. But my favourite thing to compare them to is probably at the end, when they celebrate like football players who've just won a big match.
"Great work everyone, good hustle out there, really pulled together as a team. Okay, now hit the showers. I want to see you all dressed and ready for milkshakes in ten minutes flat."
- There is so much going on in this video that I find it easier to not try to focus on it all at once, I have to do one thing and then backtrack. So now that I've gone through the whole video while looking at what the rest of them were doing, I need to backtrack and go over the lyrics to Adam Hills' song.
Question: Did Adam Hills think he was going to have to do this alone, or was he supposed to have Kitson co-MC-ing, but then Kitson jumped in partway through? Because I think the latter may have happened. Kitson was the compere for the whole night, as we see in the montage video.
Adam Hills
If you had three chances
Would you take them?
Or would you quite literally bottle it?
As I said before: don't know what he's talking about there. What got literally bottled? Why three chances?
His palms are sweaty, his hair is sweaty
He's ready to shoot spaghetti
He's got a cow on stage
It's got red horns, it's all the rage
This is veering wildly off topic, but I just want to mention that that Adam Hills got his off the cuff "stage/all the rage" rhyme because he'd heard DO'D use it in a freestyle rap battle with Daniel Kitson, that we know from the montage took place earlier than night (another one of my favourite videos, but we don't have time to go into this one right now):
youtube
It's cow tipping, it's not quite shitty
Get that cow down in this city
Take it up the Royal Mile, attack it with a hammer
Kitson's on the stage, he's [?] with a hammer
Again, how far did the cow go? They had clearly planned from the beginning (of this song, at least) to have it out on the Royal Mile. YouTube comments confirm it left the building.
David O'Doherty's going up the ass
It's time to fuck this motherfucking class
Fuck the udder (x4)
Let's get this udder fucking cow out of here
After all the times I've watched this video, this is the first time I've noticed that Adam Hills tried a pun on "mother fucking" there. Glad he's having a good time.
Daniel Kitson
Davey, Davey, what you need to do
Is combine the chisel and the hammer
Finally, some useful fucking advice.
Adam Hills
There's Martin, Demitri Martin
The Perrier win has left me smartin'
This was August 26, Hills' song mentions later that it's the last night of Late 'n' Live for that year, so the Perrier Awards had just been given out. In 2003, Demetri Martin won the main award over other nominees: Reginald D. Hunter, Flight of the Conchords, Howard Read and Little Howard, and Adam Hills. Adam Hills, who had also been nominated the previous year, when he lost to Daniel Kitson, and the year before that, when he lost to Garth Marenghi. So he is actually being, as a YouTube comment said, a pretty good sport to jump in and have fun about it. If I were him I'd probably resent losing out an award again and then not even getting to smash shit up.
John Oliver, he's the man
If that pipe won't do it, nothing can
David O'Doherty, he comes from Ireland, the land of the green
Daniel Kitson, he's got a hammer
He's also got one motherfucking stammer
I quite enjoy the way no one responds to any of this. Adam Hills starts calling them out by name, including bringing up Kitson's stutter and DO'D nationality and his awards rivalry with Demetri Martin, and none of them even briefly looks at him. They are all very busy and focused on the important task of destroying a cow.
It's time to break this cow down
It's time to break this cow down
It's not time to chow down
It's time to break this cow down
I want this verse embroidered on a throw pillow. Actually, I think I want these entire lyrics printed out and framed on my wall.
Late 'n' Live, Late 'n' Live, it's the very last night
It's time to wrap this show up tight
Send it out the front, send it out the...
[cow breaks apart]
Break the cow, break it in half
Lead it out the front to the path
Once again, talk of parading this thing around outside the venue. Where were they taking it?
Karen Koren, she's outside
She's got petrol dripping down her eyes
There was a fire at the Gilded Balloon
The police found no one else was to blame
If this season doesn't go well
This fucking venue's going up in flames
That, of course, is a reference to the Gilded Balloon's history. It burned down in a fire in December 2002. It's now August 2003, and they're in a new venue that was rebuilt nearby. Karen Koren is the venue's owner. I'm pretty sure Adam Hills is implying that she's going to burn down the new venue if the performers don't do well enough. Actually, he's not implying that, he's outright stating it. What he's implying is that she burned down the first venue, presumably for the insurance money, and she is currently outside ready to burn this one down too, if they perform badly enough to make the insurance money worth more than the shows bring in.
The cow's in half, the cow's in half
Let's hear it for the cow in half!
This is like that famous poem that was allegedly written by a child about a tiger breaking out of its cage. Sheer poetry.
Tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why I
Got out of bed at all
The morning sun goes up my window
And I can't see at all
And even if I could, it'd all be grey
But your picture on my wall
It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad
What's interesting about this is that these are the lyrics to Stan, which is a different Eminem song from the one he was (sort of) singing at the beginning, which was lose yourself. This may or may not be related to the fact that Adam Hills is the only person in this performance who was not a member of the Chocolate Milk Gang, which was a group of comedians known for not getting drunk during or after late-night Edinburgh shows.
It may also be related to the fact that this is a clip of the Edinburgh show that Adam Hills had just spent a month performing:
So he had Stan in his head all month anyway, he was on stage and remembered he was supposed to be singing an Eminem song, his brain told him that the Eminem song he sings on stage is Stan. Fair enough.
Though it's worth noting that those aren't the correct lyrics to Stan either. The Eninem song says the clouds come up the window, not the sun. Why would it be all grey and hard to see if the sun came up the window?
Crowd surf the cow, people.
I want all those lyrics printed out in fancy calligraphy font. And ornately framed. And on my wall.
So that's Cowgate, in case anyone wants to know. But this is just stuff I've said before. I said I had a new detail, didn't I? Well here it is:
Who is that man, sat unobtrusively in the background, playing the percussion set? Of course we have no way of knowing, in such low quality video without any clear shots of his face. Or do we? Because here is a screenshot of Flight of the Conchords, sitting on that very cow, earlier in the same night! (We know it was the same night because it was taken from the montage of the whole night, which ended with a second angle on Cowgate.)
Am I wrong? I might be wrong, tell me if you think I'm wrong. But I think that's Jermaine Clement playing percussion back there. Based on the evidence that: He was there that night. He does play the drums. He's a bona fide member of the Chocolate Milk Gang. And he has the same vague outline and shirt colour as the guy in those screenshots. And he was in the background of the Kitson/DO'D battle rap video, playing guitar, so he does sometime play music to accompany other comedians doing weird shit at Late 'n' Live. My new detail is I think Jermaine Clement was on the stage during Cowgate.
It is cool, really. I mean, I'm obviously being vaguely ironic by treating this late-night comedy show stunt as a vitally important mysterious ritual. But I genuinely think that what happened there is fucking cool, if you look at all those people being on one stage doing something so stupid together, and then consider where they all went after that.
And if Jermaine Clement was there, that just adds to it. The variety and international breadth of all the different comedy careers all in one place just as they were on the cusp of taking off. I mean, by plenty of definitions some had taken off already, but they have all taken off significantly more since then. Almost as though on one night in 2003, they all sacrificed a cow to the gods of success and it worked. Of the main five people involved in the sacrifice rituals, there are three Perrier Awards (Kitson, DO'D, Demetri Martin - though to be fair two of those were won before Cowgate happened so I guess we can't attribute it to the sacrifice), an MBE (Hills), and a shitload of Emmys (Oliver). Which I think they should all bring in for the prize task of the Taskmaster episode that I imagine with those five as the contestants (it's okay, I think this is worth setting racial and gender representation on panel shows back by 20 years), the studio task is to take a cow apart, the winner gets all the trophies.
That's a lot of countries. The Australian Adam Hills, the British Daniel Kitson, the American Demetri Martin, the Irish David O'Doherty, the Kiwi Jermaine Clement, and the now-British/American John Oliver. All with wildly different types of careers. All, for different reasons, among my favourite comedians. I have seen or heard all of the official video or audio stand-up releases by all six of those people (and possibly 1 or 2 or several hundred or so unofficial ones as well). And not because of this video or anything, I sought them out because those are among my favourites and then they were all on stage doing this unhinged thing together.
It's the great mystery of my lifetime, I still want to know where the fuck they got that cow. And I'm genuinely annoyed that I won't be able to see the stage where it happened when I go to Edinburgh this year, but it's all right, I'll look at the outside.
If I ever get to meet any of these people, this is the first question I'm asking. No I don't need to know anything else about your career, just please tell me, what the fuck was going on with that fucking cow in 2003?
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ooo do you have any other scenarios for a jb first kiss? or like, if you had to narrow it down to just one idea, what would be the PERFECT get-together moment for them? should it happen during winds or would you rather it be dragged out further? is it a soft/emotional moment, or passionate and lustful? does it come after they’ve acknowledged their feelings, or is the moment the catalyst for that conversation? who initiates it? is there a period of avoidance/embarrassment/insecurity either before or after, for either of them? give me all the headcanons please
i have SO many my mind is a jb first kiss scenario machine like if ever a mind reader were to try read my mind it's just gonna be jb first kiss jb kissing jb doing more than kissing but a lot of kissing is involved etc. anyway. i've always liked the idea that it gets dragged on. like i don't think they'll be the type to kiss right away once they've realized their feelings, instead, they're going to stew on their feelings instead or ignore it outright and there's just going to be this tension between them and it's a game of who's going to actually acknowledge the elephant in the room. like i really looove the idea of jb not being in a relationship but they just have this tension between them and it's like 👁️👁️??? if one of them gives a sign the whole thing will explode. like in a scenario where they're arguing bc of god knows what they just find themselves really close to each other and theyre looking at each other's lips and if one of them just leans in it's game over they're gonna start kissing then fucking on that space in particular rip to anyone who's in proximity (i am a jb first time fucking on the floor truther first and foremost!!!!!!!!) and when they start kissing they cannot stop kissing and jaime's just gonna be like god why didn't i kiss you sooner? we should've been doing this ages ago the world can end right now and i dont even care as long as i keep kissing you fuck everyone else fr and brienne's like ?? ok werk. then after that jaime will just keep pulling her on the side for quick makeout sessions like sorry the floodgate has been OPENED.
but anyway.
i definitely think jaime will initiate it once brienne sends him some signs. i don't think brienne has the confidence to kiss him first like god forbid she'll explode on the spot at the THOUGHT of kissing him the fact that he'll know that she likes him AND the possibility of rejection is too mortifying for her. but jaime is a bit more confident, and he'll read the signs. i def think it'll turn into something more like i don't think they'll just stop at the first kiss the UST is built up even if they dont go all the way they're going straight to third base. like as i said on the scenario ^ i like the idea of them having all this pent up tension and when they finally kiss the whole thing just boils over. as for the moment after i def think both of them will think abt the possibility of rejection. they're both going to wonder if that was a one time thing, or what it meant, but those thoughts will dispel the moment they see each other again and go back to kissing lmfao im sorry i think these two are horny! not my fault germ built up their ust!!! literally blame him not me.
but i also like the idea of them giving each other kisses before having theee 'big' kiss. like i've been toying with this idea for a while but like imagine like in a post LSH scenario or whatever, and brienne ends up saving jaime's life, and in the end he just gives her a kiss on the cheek because that's what the ladies do to the knights who saves their lives or something... and he tells her she owes him a kiss bc he saved her in the bearpit ... or like brienne suffering in the quiet isle we have to her for the angst ok and jaime just kisses her forehead to calm her down from her nightmares .. like little kisses that they refuse to elaborate later... god.......... u can't see me but im wrangling my hands rn.]
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When Jehan came aboard the Aklak he was unsurprised to discover the Elementals were sparring. They had formed a Bearpit in the center of the cavernous Mech Bay, a loose ring with two Fighters in the middle. Whoever won would stay in the center, whoever lost, would join the tail end of the circle and the next person in line would step in.
He approved. With what faced them on Helios, his troops needed to be at their best, and a Bearpit not only tested skill but also stamina. There were few warriors who could make their way around the full circle without a defeat, and some of those few were in the bay below him.
As he descended to the deck, he waved off attention with an order of "As you were." Scanning the circle, he found the shock of teal hair he was looking for. Good. She was not fighting.
"Point Commander Evelyn. A word." He waved the huge Elemental over. The Freeborn daughter of test-out Elementals, she had made a career as a footballer on Sheliak before he had caught one of her games during a layover on the planet.
Her no-holds barred style (and several penalties for excessive force) had caused him to offer her a Trial of Position on the spot. Despite her promotions since, she retained the flamboyant style that had made her popular on the field.
The pair withdrew from the center of the chamber, setting their backs against the legs of a Dragonfly.
"I have an assignment for you, Evelyn." He started, and she nodded. "You and your Point will not be going into battle with the Striker Nova." He raised a hand to still the inevitable protest.
"Instead, your point, and Point Commander Eirik's, are going to be detached. To the Apitiliit. We expect the Word to deploy WMDs. You and your Elementals will provide security for our quick response decon teams."
"But Star Colonel!" Evelyn's voice was stringent, and carefully pitched not to carry to the Bearpit - an easy feat given the continued sounds of unarmed combat. "Why us? We have no recent demerits, and scored highest in the recent exercises."
"Exactly, Evelyn. The Word are dezgra. Fellow Clanners would not think of attacking support staff who were not part of the Batchall. Even most Spheroid warriors would avoid attacking such a target without provocation. But the Word of Blake would attack such a target in preference to one capable of striking back."
She let out a slight hum, thinking.
"So. This assignment is not to keep us out of combat but because you expect us to be needed, quiaff?"
"Aff. If you can impress this on your warriors, and on Eiriks, I would be grateful. This fight will be hard enough without us jockeying for position and fighting amongst ourselves. There will be glory enough for all of us."
"Very well. When shall we transfer dropships?" Evelyn asked, all business now that her biggest concern had been cleared up.
"I believe there is to be some shuffling of equipment and transfer of personnel and vehicles. Once that is complete, then you may move your Points over. You will be commanding the Clawtake ground assets, but be sure to liaise with your Technicans and with the Star League personnel who will be accompying you."
"Aff. Will that be all?" She asked, and Jehan nodded.
"Go on back to your Bearpit, ruffian." He told her fondly, and then paused. "Actually, is there room for one more?"
He would get absolutely pummeled, but it would be good for morale, and a good brawl would help ease the tension of all this organizing. And his Elementals could be trusted not to break their commanding officer. Probably.
#battletech#mechwarrior#story event#yes all the Clawtakes dropships use Inuk names#The Battle (Command Star) is in the Nanulak which is the name for a hybrid Polar/Grizzly Bear#The Fire Star is in the Nanuk which is the Inuk word for Polar Bear#and the Striker Star is in the Aklak which is Inuk for Grizzly Bear#The support dropship is the Apitillip which is the Inuk word for a denning Polar Bear#at least according to Google.
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Item No: 186
Item Name: Bearpit defence fund poster
Description: Poster for a fundraiser raising money for the Bearpit
Box Name: PRSC EPHEMERA May 2019 >
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Ah yes the hershey bearpitals. And Ovi.
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Eat it Bitch!
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Jaime is a traumatised soul. His trauma started in his youth, before the Red Keep.
He was but a young boy when he joined his first campaign and subsequently became knighted, but he saw some horrors there and realized that the songs, stories and reality were far different from one another.
Once he joined the kingsguard in King’s Landing and had to stand guard over the Mad king himself he had to whitness him brutaile his wife, rape innocent women, murder and burn people alive. All at the age of 15/16 until he was named ‘kingslayer’ at the end of Robert’s rebellion.
He does have a way of coping with stress and trauma and that is disassociation ‘going away inside’ as he calls it. It’s something he’s had to perfect from an early age and now it’s almost seamless. He still has triggers, open flames makes him somewhat uncomfortable, thoughts of dragons and dragon fire has him shaken. violence against women and unfairness to the innocent makes his blood boil.
Fast forward to the bloody mummers, how they captured him and Lady Brienne, almost raped her, cut of his hand, almost dying because of fever and infection, self starvation, survivor’s guilt, fighting off a hungry bear in a bearpit. All after having been kept in a dungeon to starv for a year.
Lady stoneheart -
He still has nightmares, especially about what he witnessed in King’s Landing before the Mad king was killed and if he has one he’s mostly ‘off’ for the rest of the day. Quick to anger, annoyed, distant.
He doesn’t like to talk about it and he will not speak of it.
But he is a knight, he is Jaime Lannister and he has to cope.
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I’m setting up antennae conections with solar energy out on face of oldschool southwest my coffee is too hot I’m hot talking king talking ping pongi King Kong the king ape gold Goodyear formulae the one South Pole position racing in red bolid solid racing Polish hitchhiker through the galaxylophone electro synth disco in retro elektronik synthesatorizla blue in red free style frame of mind bathing golden cosmic sun rays taking front seat to charge the copper battery inside Poematrix bios vintage computeraz is upgrade in operational generation system outsourced download packages rich database on base smart art in bartera under the counter vintage pharmacy entrance out the street I am speakers Tori Amos in Kafe kino outside table now but back in time eight bit pixelement fizzling system in this oldschoool consoles consolid matter substance in resonance resistance loco motif locoalition station Montpelier my resistance in training the train expression speed tracking king on magnet track big in Japan I’m dyke van dama still miss in buddha monkey the key in life force Ki existence key hole experience corner shop Indian overseer seen me instant in hanuman activisation in god mode level settings on Technotronik elektronik chronikal streamericannabis propaganja Poematrix holy script Solarislavic VIPippi reactivation oldschool Neobeat superego the strongest girl in the world I download new vision onset reseting switchboard control room shroomythic subway underground bearpit ground zero zero point in pointless one direction welcome interzone back home honey ey wait I’m walking king who sing lord of rings on mental journey around the galaxy inside this station on crossroads miniaturanaliza teorealia dializa organicotine absorbing resistance in exposed on cosmic radiation ☢️ cellular dimension insight zooming French cartoon ce la vie we should travel to see French town I need to go to Montpelier bring them my pi uterus mirror psycho loco motion freeze in photovision composition architects tactical detailing mental exploration in liberation rationanalyse pippshow through feminimanaliza filters I wear on my unique artistic exposition inside spyramidealismat general analizator in synthesator electro vintage past mirror flashback to the future cyberpunk dyke One Vision artefakt faktoradioaktive tracking King anarchia pole position steampunk cyber Azera supernova initial upload in progress systeampunk industrial stardust Ziggy gigabyte beat repeat the Neo beat inspired obsessive pi extrancendental realisation mathemat schemat x in XeNike Xeroserial intensive care psycho loco motive patientity quality lithium mind stabilizing Zink inking king on papers persuasive inspection exposition pole position on race speedy Gonzales madness magnet one track mind resonate super train over the tracking king stoned network reworking reward out the ward past export artificial white sodium bright lamp samplasmat in automatic steer pilot ground control I’m floating out in space on board in pace agent orange net red neon on Neo beat relocation golden bridge town in American dream chasing the dreamatematik logos spellinguistick terminator oldschool elektronikę goddess synth spiked psy trancentrala base mental loco active sensors on surface facing interactive TexT exe.cute realisation my teoria poematyk is automatic mathematic sequence linguistic mistic subjective script decoder ion double decker bottom visibleed out sidewalk speedwalk my way to say I may be setting simulation activisation smoking glass pipe on sand bay loco active point on mental map I discover simulacra instant progress my simbolane planetarium triumphasisteer futurealia teoria trial gold mind Sindbad magic rug I feed chemo calories to fly high hop over the grass Rasta state of mind open micro Lens scify zoom loophole sample freeze ampera twelve monkey automotivator
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