au where beatrice and lilith are the new owners of an almost bankrupt hotel (that was built over where a very controversial orphanage used to be) who are determined to save the hotel from bankruptcy, and ava is one of the ghosts haunting the hotel

Sexy people ship all four of them together

*Everyone eating lunch together*

Ava, *rizzing up bea*: I know I can’t have your eyes but our kids can

Beatrice: *hardcore blushes* we uh..we have the same color eyes ava..

Camila & Yasmine: *giggles*

Lilith: You know some people are trying to eat here *disgusted*

lilith: what is it like dating ava? beatrice: one time she referred to sand as 'heterosexual glitter' lilith: beatrice: i'm in love with her.

Anyone else losing hope about Warrior Nun’s revival? It’s like we’ve hit a brick wall… absolute radio silence for weeks… I thought we would’ve heard something by now regarding cast/crew/production company/ storyline, but nothing???

I wanna sit in the "Lilith, Bea's oldest friend" of it all in the Arq-Tech infirmary scene but my brain always jumps right to "Beatrice, you are the father"

So we know why everyone in the gang joined the OCS except Mother Superion. Beatrice wanted to not be gay, essentially. Camila’s dad died and she noticed her mom couldn’t afford to feed them both. Lilith was basically born into it (which raises a few plot holes, but whatever). Mary was the daughter of a (justifiable) murderer and was convinced to become part of something bigger than herself by Vincent.

But I really wanna know about Shannon. I wanna know why she joined the convent. I wanna know how she came to be the halo bearer. I need it.

The Problem Of Pain (master list)

For those of you who have been following along, here is a list of the fics in The Problem of Pain Series. (I will update with Links as they are posted.) 

PART 1: Holy War  

On a mission to help end the Holy War, Beatrice sustains life-threatening injuries and has to fight to survive, while Lilith, Camila, and Ava attempt to secure crucial artifacts for the fight to come. Mother Superion makes her way to them, but will it be enough?

PART 2: Once A Rookie

Beatrice shows up at the gates of Cat's Cradle young and a little afraid of what's to come. She's spent her last several years trying to make up for a horrible misunderstanding that got her sent away from the home her parents had built - Outcast from their legacy to maybe find salvation in serving the church. A highly competent team of 2 nuns and a shotgun adopt her as their rookie and teach her everything she knows.

incredible art by @princington

PART 3: (title tbd) 

Follows Beatrice through S1, and S2. It’s mostly going to be little snippets of Off screen moments setting up for Holy War and putting Ava and Beatrice together.  

PART 4: Beatrice Alone 

Beatrice finds herself sitting at the edge of the arc at the end of season 2. Beatrice copes with losing Ava (or at least tries), finds Lilith, and picks up everyone’s favorite man (Brother Kiva). 

Part 5: Guess Who’s Back

You guessed it! The reunion we were all waiting for had the team back together and tossed headfirst into the fight for the world. Ava adjusts to being back. Beatrice confronts her past. Camila has some troubles at Notre Dame. Lilith is Lilith. 

or

Moments and Missions Leading into Holy War 

Part 6: Battels 

Beatrice is finally pulled from the coma induced at the end of Holy War and, with the help of her sisters, learns to cope with a difficult recovery as she tries to get back into the fight. The rest of the team and the OCS are there as much as they can while trying not to let the fate of the world slip away. They are all doing their best, but a lifetime of fighting takes a toll, so many tolls on the body, the mind, and the spirit, and some are easier paid than others

Part 7: Iron in Bloom

Shannon Masters has grown up around New York's finest, and following in her Father Sean's footsteps was the only thing that mattered. But when everything goes to shit, Shannon finds herself reeling.

Enter: The Order of the Cruciform Sword

Or

Shannon's original story for The Problem of Pain AU series, and how she came to be in Once A Rookie.

"A God like figure is someone we automatically assume they're benevolent, but that doesn't necessarily mean that they're benevolent in our definition" Simon Barry about Reya

Link to the interview

Watching Overly Sarcastic Productions and thinking about immortal roommates tonight... Ava's origins are extremely murky and will remain so, but if we want to imagine something, we might imagine Minoan Crete, which would put the time of her birth at around 1900 BCE or even earlier (an absolutely mind-boggling number of years ago). Ava will never confirm it in so many words, but she'll make references/jokes to bulls and volcanos every now and then that make Bea go 👀👀👀. That's if we want her origins to be semi-based in real history and not something completely out there like the Kaktusverse or something.

whoops, only just now saw this and this, and to answer the latter rq because i feel it might be weird to answer it now but it feels ruder to not, but fav genres are mostly like first person shooters, + street fight esque hames, RTS gamex & platformers

haven’t and don’t play many games, so fav games would probably be spiderman ps4/2018, minecraft, super smash bros, kotor, & command and conquer generals + earthworm jim 1 & 2. not a fav but diablo 2 is immensely fun

i keep meaning to branch out, i wanna try more of the what’s it’s name, a tier or w(e games like bioshock, skyrim, mass effect, god of war, assassins creed (bc defo agreed on the hot women + the historical setting is defo interestujg), portal

or something

also pls do elaborate on the skydrim modding 👀)

anyway back to the program

Ava: how do you know i was around when the minoan crete was around

also ava: *has a bunch of misc random bull & bull themed paper weights & knick knacks & plushies scattered theoughout the apartment esp on ava’s side of the bedroom*

also ava: beatrice, lilith, you won’t *bull*ieve it- beatrice & lilith: you got arrested again didn’t you?

GL-18200

real ava origin is that she just spontaneously started existing out of nowhere /j

she’s literally older than the universe itself

no but more seriously i feel a bit like: (see below meme) because i don’t know too much about it but am 👀👀👀 regardless

also what’s the kaktusverse? 👁️

ava & lilith and probably later on bea defo got up to so much crimes because whenever they got caught by local law enforcement *mushroom voice* you cannot kill me in any way that matters

some random bits

keep meaning to mention but 1) lilith was the daughter of a military leader

lilith pre vampirification was like, briefly a military leader, mostly through coercion because the forces she was commanding, b4 she cane into command, were loosing badly, the town (probably lilith’s hometown) was almost destroyed and while they already had vv few competent peoplr let alone leaders among them (tbf they really didn’t have a need for em, but then the town was ambushed), even the few were either injured or dead so when they noticed lilith still being alive, and thanks to knowing about her dad + thx to lilith’s dad, knowing that lilth had showed a good amount of aptitude in fighting and military strategy shit, they coerced her (probably through threatning some friend or family of hers) into helping “just to fight off the invading forces” and so they did

but the forces wanted lilith to help them invade other places to “recoop looses” and what not, so that wasn’t the end of the coercion

lilth ended up faking her death so she could get out of the deal without putting her friend/s and(or family at risk, but it also meant she couldn’t return home to keep them out of danger

And then not long after that, like a year or two later lilith became a vampire

i think ava lilith & beatrice all probably need to skidaddle off by themselves every so often (to varying ampunts and degrees obv), and while ava & lilith are mutually aware of that and did the majority of the communication shit over it a while ago, beatrice isn’t on the same page

So a bit into beatrice formally moving in with ava & lilith, she just kinda gets antsy, in large part because the mental gymnastics of convincing herself people don’t care or don’t care very much, are at an all time high and in all honesty, while it might seem counter intuitive ava & lilith’s near constant prescencex are making it worse

but beatrice can’t manage to make herself say that until one day she ends up turning full tail (literally) and just is like 🏃‍♂️

lilith finds her a bit later at some mcdonalds or some fast food place (thanks to the becoming a werewolf stuff, beatrice has a lot bigger appetitie that she’s still adjusting to which means there’s a good few times where beatrice unwittingly finds herself suddenly feeling weak from not enough food and so ends up just having to go with the closest source of food she can find that won’t take her a bunch of effort to eat pr like poison her or anything ((ava & lilith, but esp lilith because she can relate makes sure to watch out for how much food beattice’s had in a day and do shit like keeping snacks on hand, eyc to try and minimize these incidents))) and just sits with beatrice until she’s ready to talk

beatrice & lilith are probably often the best at talking each other out of whatever dumb mental gymnastics they’re doing now because of how similar they are

also lilith & beatrice are, depending on who you ask surprisingly chaotic, they’ve accidentally gotten involved in a few disasterous shenanigans (which is a lot different from purposely doing so)

lilith started courting beatrice but completely forgot to mention so poor beatrice is vv confusedly flustered to death several times over by lilith

also ava 🤝 lilith 🤝 beatrice: god’s sleepiest soldiers

ava wants to spend time w lilith so she (im)patiently waits until nightime but she also wants to take full use of sunlight so she also is awake during the day, which, esp since ava gets tired a lot quicker than the average person means ava quickly learns to take several naps during the day or else be knocked out cold during the most inconvenient of times

sometimes those naps happen during night so lilith often decides to just nap w ava when that happens, and they never really change that system, so basically they’re vv used to taking naps several times a day, especially with each other so not napping would throw them off their rhythm and also they’re probably so used to the routine that they begin feeling sleepy when they see the other taking a nap, regardless if they woke u literally just an jour or so ago

Fantasia

Paprika is the troublemaker, Bay Leaf is the matchmaker.

“I assure you, there was a noise at regular intervals.”

“Until I came in the room?” Ava asks.

“Correct. It did not stop when Camila investigated. She suggested a ghost in the machine,” Beatrice frowns. “Hello, Lilith. Have you… misplaced Paprika?”

“No, but Bay Leaf has gone on a walkabout; if you see them let me know?”

“Maybe Baby spice is the ghost in the machine,” Ava laughs, removing a cover panel to find a cephalopod that has clearly been tapping a pipe with one of Beatrice’s mechanical pencils. “Holy shit!”

“Language!”

lilith tuts at bay leaf the whole way back to the aquarium, ‘i can’t comprehend what makes you so certain that your interference is even necessary with those two’ & almost shrieks when cam materializes out from among a couple of empty tanks with paprika draped scarflike around her neck.

the two of them stand there. cam looking dashing with her artfully tousled curls and her little grin and paprika wearing his natural red and orange and burnt umber.

lilith, meanwhile, looks perplexed. dressed in her lab coat, which is perpetually stained with fish-guts. bay leaf has one arm stuck to her cheek and he’s trying to climb up out of her arms.

less than dashing, if you aren’t biased when it comes to marine biologists. and camila certainly is.

cam laughing and saying, ‘oh so i was right - it was a ghost in the machine.’

lilith: ‘i don’t-’

cam: ‘it’s a Greek theater thing. you know, deus ex machina.’

lilith: ‘oh… i didn’t know you liked Greek theater.’

cam: ‘uh, well, i like Medea as much as the next person but i know it mostly because of The Matrix. you’d like it, i think. says some pretty interesting things about gender, reality. the monsters are kind of chthonic.’

lilith: ‘right.’

lilith: ‘i have to go.’

cue paprika slapping one arm over cam’s face to save her the trouble of putting her head in her hands.

cam: ‘lilith wait!… we’re going in the same direction.’

but all she’s left with is the sweep of lilith’s white coat disappearing around the corner, the lingering smell of saltwater and gore.

(bay leaf grabbing very dramatically onto the wall when lilith turns the corner, forcing her to stop and gently pry his suckers off the plaster while blushing furiously)

camila sighs, looks at paprika, ‘c'mon buddy, let’s get you back home.’

‘your mom is really weird.’

The Second Coming (Avatrice fic) Chapter 2

“And you?” Beatrice asked the next recruit in the formation.

"Isabel." She replied with a warm smile.

Beatrice was taken aback. All the recruits tried to appear serious or tough in front of her, but this girl didn't care, she smiled probably because she felt like it. Beatrice respected that, and she liked it. She responded in kind.

After a few months, Beatrice had befriended some of the recruits, including Isabel, with whom she seemed to be growing closer than to the others. Maybe because of her vibrant personality, her stubbornness, or maybe her will to do exactly what she wanted. Well, the fact that they came from rich families also helped them bond, as it did with Lilith.

"When it was my family's turn to serve the order, I let my mother know I'd be happy to do it, but there was no way I was becoming a nun." Isabel had once told Beatrice. "To save time and face, she had no other choice but to accept." She smirked.

Beatrice was always impressed by this girl. Her determination and freedom were enviable, she wished she'd been as brave as her and rebelled against her parents and their ever-relentless pressure.  It was too late; all she could do now was enjoy the company of this girl who somehow felt so familiar.

At one point, Isabel hosted a gathering.

Beatrice and the other recruits drank and talked for hours, with music playing in the background.

When it was all over, Beatrice volunteered to help Isabel clean up. Later, as she was about to leave, Isabel walked her over to the door.

"Thanks for the help," Isabel said nervously.

"Um yeah, no problem," Beatrice replied, noticing Isabel's sudden change of mood, but decided not to mention it. "Anyway, see you on Monday." She said politely.

"Yeah, sure. Right." Isabel babbled.

This time Beatrice was worried, this behavior was very unlike the usually cheeky girl. She was about to ask Isabel if everything was all right when she was interrupted by Isabel's lips on hers...

Continue reading

A year since Warrior Nun season 2 dropped on Netflop and you’re mistaken if you think I’ve moved on with my life like a normal human being. Is Dean going to emerge from hiding any time soon orrrr?

"Could it be called a blind date if two people who have never met spend hours together heading the same direction?"

Lilith asks to arrange Beatrice's ticket. Beatrice's only excuse for not seeing this at the brilliant red flashing warning sign it is, is the headache she's been fighting since she woke up ten hours ago. Not coincidentally, at the same time she saw her mother's email message. The one that demanded her home for her brother's wedding next week. Beatrice agrees with a quick (unnecessary) reminder that she'd prefer a train to a plane. Lilith waves her off to her room and the blissful dark quiet with a snarky quip about how they've known each other long enough for Lilith to know what she needs. Beatrice is asleep before she can wonder why Lilith said 'needs'. Lilith, of course, knows the thing Beatrice needs most for that trip is a distraction. Thankfully her girlfriend has a devilishly wicked mind. Camila doesn't need to wait patiently for ten hours as her best friend works herself into a stress headache trying to love both herself and her family. "Hey Ava, remember that favour you promised me last week for bringing you ice cream home at 2 am?" Ava's head pops up over the back of the couch. "Yes! It was amazing Cam. You totally deserve a 'best roommate' award." "Good," Camila grins. "I'm cashing it in." Ava fist pumps. "Alright! What'll it be? Supper for a week? The best cupcakes you've ever had? Want me to beat up Todd for you?" Camila adopts a thoughtful look. Todd had seemed like a great guy. His wife thought so too. Fortunately in learning about Mrs. Todd Camila had the great fortune to meet someone she liked a whole lot more. "Can you even bake?" She finally asks. "Nope!" Ava cheers happily. "But oh my god, I found the most amazing cupcake stand at the farmer's market last week. I was going to bring you one but I ate them all." Ava's utterly unrepentant. Camila gasps. "Betrayal!" She clutches at her heart. "E tu, Pikachu?" Ava shrugs. "I'll grab extra next time I'm there. Seriously though, what's the favour?" "Oh, that, I'm sending you on a blind date. Pack an overnight bag." Ava tilts her head. "We're that confidant are we?" Camila laughs. "Trust me, you won't be able to stop." Two days later, trapped in a two-person train cabin for the next sixteen hours and thirty-six minutes Ava doesn't know if she should be impressed or scared of her best friend. She's hopeful that her blind date is at least how. She doesn't know she should be hoping someone (anyone) told Beatrice this is a blind date.

I am once again thinking about blood, specifically blood and hands. Hands desperately covering a wound with blood pooling beneath it. Fingers sticking together because blood is surprisingly sticky. Streaks of blood on a character's face because the bleeding person wanted to comfort them by touching their face. Blood caked into the cuticles and under nails turning them dark red. Blood crawling up wrists as they grow more frantic. That iron smell sticking to their hands even after washing the blood off and turning the sink pink.

omg, forgot to mention but re: who would like the prequels, and who would hate em, i think maybe surprisingly, ava would hate em because she’s willing to guve most things a pass, unless it’s a shitty prequel and/or sequel in her eyes (canonverse reason for this hc is because there was a crapton of shitty prequels & sequels at the orphanage snd they were practically most the only things ava could watch or read, for this universe, idk, she’s just picky in this aspect)

and lilith is a firm prequel defender, but mostly because of her crush on, idk, prequels yoda or ki adi mundi, mostly because i like to hc her as being bi & having the worst and/or weirdest taste in men (see adriel) because it’s funny

Ava values storytelling and it's one of the few things she's actually picky about, so she has many hardcore opinions abouts media, and the prequels are just one of the many hills she's chosen to die on (symbolically only, of course). Lilith does like the prequels, especially for the weird men, but she also has a soft spot for Padme and especially Padme's outfits.