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pinniped-medibots · 20 days

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[the botnapper is in the same room that florian is currently working in, discussing some sort of inheritance over the phone]

[one thing may stand out to the medibot]

"what do you mean the spybot is tricky legally?"

[hes talking about arthur]

[ He was pretending not to, but as soon as he heard that sentence, Florian began to listen very closely to his captor’s words. ]

[ He waited a couple minutes after the phone call ended and after he finished his task before speaking up in that flat, monotone voice of his. It was almost uncanny how he could flip a switch with his voice like that. ]

[ Florian pretended to pause for a moment, as if he were searching through his internal data. Which, of course, he wasn’t. ]

I HAVE SOME RATHER UNFORTUNATE INFORMATION REGARDING YOUR OWNERSHIP OF BOTH MYSELF AND THE SPYBOT STORED AWAY, IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO HEAR IT.

[ Please let this work. ]

#tf2 rp #hat collection #at your service!#emotionally anxious spybots #pinniped medibots

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prismaticpichu · 1 year

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Alright Tumblr ate my ask the first time so this is Take 2.

I had this idea that I thought was Right up your alley: Zack explaining to Sephiroth that m&ms and mini m&ms are in fact different and there is Absolutely a superior one! Complete with Sephiroth forcibly trying each type because Zack came prepared!

Ok, ok. First off-

Heck YEAHHHH!!!! Mini m&ms are SO different than the normal ones!!! I’ve been fighting for this cause for so, so long…. ;-; Ohhhhhhh the beautiful, chocolatey, Willy-Wonkity validation!!!

*mops self off floor, reapplies glasses.* Uh huh… uh huh. I see. Yes ma’am this is 110% Zack Fair territory! Phenomenal scenario xD xD

It all starts as Zack is taking a stroll down ShinRa HQ, heading to the training grounds for some morning stretches, when he stumbles across something shiny.

Well bowl him over with a popsicle stick! It’s a lucky Gil!

Trajectory is immediately changed upon finding this lucky gil. The pupper starts thinking about where in his pocket he could keep it, somewhere where it could be a golden charm no matter where he went—wait, no! He can’t keep this lucky Gil to himself! That would be so selfish. He already was blessed with the luck, and now it is time to pass the treasure on to someone who deserved it even more. That was what lucky Gil were placed on the floor for!

And what better than to spend it on his bestest buddy?

Seph’s office is just a jump, skip, and elevator away, and a sitcom guitar riff later and Zack is bouncing inside. He asks his buddy what’d he like from the vending machine—no exceptions! Ofc there is the predictable “it’s 7:45 in the morning why would I eat candy…” and yadyayadya SHUDDUP, MAN! YOU ARE THE WORST.

The truth though? The truth is that Sephiroth’s diet was forcefully meddled with long long ago, and he is very pleased at the offer—especially when chocolate comes into the equation. The big bad General loves his chocolate <3 <3

A decent amount of time passes as Sephiroth muses over which candy to choose… for it really is a long, painful endeavor of forked decision… until finally, Wii Party applause erupting in the background, the man makes up his mind.

“Would you get those… chocolate fish bowl pebbles?”

“M&Ms?” Zack immediately translates. “Sure! Mini or regular?”

There’s a pause. A serious one. “What’s the difference?”

Oh. OH. Oh no. Oh NO NO NO. He did NOT. Zack’s world is crushed, all from the single, careless, uneducated sentence that left his friend’s lips. All his life… all his life people said he was, like, deranged for thinking m&m’s baby brother had a different taste—his parents, his school friends, his SOLDIER friends… not Seph too!

“You’re joking, right? RIGHT?”

“No, Zack. They would taste exactly the same.”

“But they’re different! I’m telling you!”

“It’s all in your head.”

“No it’s NOT!”!

“It’s a marketing technique; they have to make people think they’re different.”

Who put this guy on the PLANET???

This goes back and forth for quite some time, until finally, Zack just smushes his head into Sephiroth desk. Boom. Slam. The pupper’s heart cannot take any more of this. Is he really gonna have to become a missionary? Really? REALLY?? Is he really gonna have to travel across the land on a camel and awaken everyone by himself…?!

Meanwhile, Sephiroth doesn’t even see this as a pathetic display over candy. Not even for a lick of a second. The man is sitting there now, and feeling totally and utterly ashamed at himself. Look at how betrayed Zack feels—look at how hurt. And he is the cause of this. He long promised Zack he would never have to feel the sting of betrayal again; he was supposed to protect him. He needs to fix this.

“…Would you like me to try them?”

Zack’s head snaps up. “Yes plz!”

Ifrit. He’s been duped.

So as Sephiroth is scanning over his life choices (again), Zack zooms out of the office and returns with two—count ‘em TWO—types of m&ms (on the bright side, lucky Gil lives another day! This was just nibbled from the paycheck). Then chocolate is poured into both of Sephiroth’s palms, because remember kids, a bit of added glove flavor really does wonders.

“Alright, bud! Eat both of them and tell me there’s a difference.”

Not wanting to hurt Zack’s feelings (again), and also because chocolate, Sephiroth relents and pops an ordinary m&m into his mouth. It’s tasty. It’s gone much too quickly. He’s kinda sad now.

“Now the mini one!”

Sephiroth plucks up the baby candy too, but he wants to make it very clear from his glazed kitty eyes that he is purely indulging Zack (and also bc chocolate). Under no circumstances is he actually going to sit there and believe that just because something is 3/8 inches in diameter compared to its normal size that it will EVER ta—

…Oh. Oh my.

Now, the thing about being a superhuman, DNA-tampered-celestial cat-man-guy-thing, is that you are born with very KEEN… well, very keen everything, but mostly very keen taste. You will be tasting the rainbow, and Sephiroth… Sephiroth does taste that itty-bitty, wondrous, milky thread of a divergence in flavor. And it is… it is GOOD. And that wasn’t even his epiphany!

Of course! How could he be so foolish?? The surface area:volume ratio would ofc make it taste sweeter!

It is that day that Krakatoa re-erupted, right as Sephiroth is given the tightest and squeeziest squeeze Zack has ever squeezed (don’t worry, don’t worry, he finished chewing!). It is also from that day forward that Zack would always have someone to phone up whenever science is challenged. It is from that day forward that ShinRa entered a true, metaphysical state of awakening <3

I mean no one disagrees with Sephiroth’s opinion that’s really it.

#crisis core #introducing major stupidity!#at your service!#ffvii #zack fair #randomness #sephiroth #asks #puppy zack #weenie hut jrs #pichu’s world #it is true!! it is so very true!!!#mini m&ms all the WAY!!!

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roosterbruiser · 9 months

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#millie for you!#at your service!#polls!#wips #cruel summer #HOT TO GO!#fuck: the universe

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pokeficdaily · 1 year

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thanks for the free reaction images

you're welcome 😏

#at your service!#not a fic #asks #15xmr #mod 🐝

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todo-360 · 1 year

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Todo what’s something you like doing

Well, I rather like watching the stars go by during pseudomotion when Mr. Bane and I accelerate upon entering hyperspace!

Do not tell him I told you this, but sometimes he lets me sit on his lap for a better view!

#Todo 360 #At your service!#Inquiries are open!

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satan-saturn · 1 year

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Say what are your ships?

Bold of you to assume I've actually thought about Puyo ships in the last few months, let alone Puyo at all.

But, uh.

Sigami

Teerin

Lidelle/Yu

and that's it. Mind you, I don't object to anything else unless it's like... actually problematic... but these are my primaries.

#at your service!#cinnayanny #puyoposting

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biggest-gaudiest-patronuses · 2 months

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"taken" style action movie where a man searches for his wife. as he fights baddies in gunfights and hand-to-hand combat, it's slowly revealed that:

his wife hasn't been kidnapped

their marriage is not healthy or functional

this guy isn't rescuing his wife, he's hunting her down

his wife is a crime boss, those are her henchpeople he's fighting in a john-wick bloodbath

the tension builds until, drenched in blood, our protagonist steps forward for the final showdown. he pulls a manila envelope from his bullet-torn jacket and throws it at his wife's feet. he's just spent an entire trilogy biting & killing & maiming....all so he can deliver his shit wife her divorce papers

#THIS IS BECAUSE YOU DON'T ANSWER YOUR EMAILS BETHANNY #IT'S NOT THAT HARD TO GET STUFF NOTARIZED BETHANNEY #MANY BANKS PROVIDE THAG SERVICE BETHANEY. FREE OF CHARGE.

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badolmen · 10 months

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People against piracy fail to realize that no, I can’t just ‘buy it.’ They stopped making DVDs and Blu-Rays. They’re barely offering digital copies for download. I am not spending money I could use for food or bills to pay for a subscription service just so I can always have access to a beloved piece of media. Especially not when the service will remove media on a whim without concern for how the loss of access to that piece will make its artistic conservation nigh impossible.

For example, I recently learned that Disney+ had an original film called Crater. It’s scifi, family friendly, and seems cool - I would love to buy it as a holiday gift for my little brother! But: it’s exclusive to D+ and THEY REMOVED IT LITERALLY MONTHS AFTER ITS RELEASE.

The ONLY way I can directly access this film is through piracy. The ONLY available ‘copies’ of this film are hosted on piracy websites. Disney will NEVER release it in theaters, or as something to buy, and it may NEVER return to the streaming service. It will be LOST because we aren’t allowed to purchase it for personal viewing. If I can’t pay to own it, I won’t pay for the privilege of losing it when corporate decides to put it in a vault.

So yes, I’m going to pirate and support piracy.

#ra speaks #piracy #media piracy #pirate to make hondo ohnaka proud #obligatory ‘don’t fucking pirate small authors/artists works wtf dude’ statement.#anyone who’s seen my media bitching before knows I’m a hype man for indie films this ain’t about them #this is about corporate streaming services killing physical media bc sales numbers are less impressive than number of streams #edit: USAmericans stop telling me to buy DVDs and blurays at Walmart. think outside your borders for a hot sec. fun thought exercise.#your experiences are not universal #edit: WHO GOT THIS TO 100k. I JUST WANT TO TALK (this post is my second to hit 100k woahg.)#in other news: fix your fucking posture. drink some fucking water. and go the fuck to bed if it’s late bc it’s for me rn. peace and light.

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vienrose · 2 months

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Starter call!!

#at your service!

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pinniped-medibots · 2 months

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INTRODUCING MYSELF !!

HELLO, I'M OTTO !! AND I'M A MEDIBOT !! JOYOUS !!

I LIVE WITH MY SIBLINGS AND DAD AT HIS WORKSHOP !! I WOULDN'T WANT TO BE ANYWHERE ELSE !! WONDROUS !! IM ALSO SHARING WITH OSWALD, UDO, FLORIAN, KLAUS AND KASPAR !!

MY FAVOURITE THINGS ARE HATS, SEALS, AND MY FRIENDS !!

MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY !!

MECHANIC @emotionally-mature-mechanic - MY DAD !!

SPYBOT SYS @emotionally-anxious-spybots - MY SIBLINGS !! I'VE KNOWN THEM SINCE FOREVER !!

MECHAMEDES @emotionally-mean-mechamedes - MY BIRD. HE VISITS ME SOMETIMES !!

JANIE @emotionally-clumsy-soldier - HE'S MY UNCLE !!

BOLTY @physically-vampiric-medic - HE'S HELPED ME THROUGH A LOT !!

CLIFFORD @emotionally-shy-soldierbot - THEY’RE MY COUSIN !!

SYLVESTER @physically-synthetic-engibot - WE'RE LIKE A TEAM TOGETHER !!

ESMÉ @mentally-joyful-demobot - SHE HAS A REALLY PRETTY GARDEN I LIKE TO VISIT !!

REDIBOT @physically-artificial-medic - SOMETIMES-FRIEND.

CLOWNIBOT @mentally-silly-medibot - HE'S... A BIT STRANGE? IN A GOOD WAY !!

PROTO @physically-bloody-medibot - ALSO KINDA STRANGE !! PLEASE DONT PUT HIM AND CLOWNI IN THE SAME ROOM TOGETHER. EVER. UNPLEASANT.

everything past 'keep reading' is ooc!

Otto, along with the other robots in his cpu, are medibots. Formed by the assembly lines that were once owned by Gray Mann, something from within caused him to gain the ability to feel, to think, to love, to become sentient.

Shortly after his 'awakening', he learned that they weren't the only one. So many more robots were alive, just like he was, and some have even been around for longer than they have! They were just the first to make themself known.

Otto is mentally around 14 years of age, and goes by he/him and they/them. He is the host.

Udo is the same age as Otto, and goes by exclusively they/them. They are the current co-host.

Oswald ranges from around 6 to 10 years, and goes by mostly they/them while occasionally using she/her.

Florian acts like one of the oldest of the system, despite being around 15. They generally enjoy taking a caretaker role for the system and others, and goes by he/him and they/them.

Klaus has the hottest temper out of anyone in the system, generally taking over when someone else gets angry enough, and exploding at whatever's gotten them riled up. Generally goes by only he/him.

#joyous! wondrous! - otto’s talking tag

#happy to see you! - oswald’s talking tag

#kannst du mich verstehen? - udo's talking tag

#at your service! - florian's talking tag

#quit bugging me. - klaus's talking tag

#blue pen ink - text post tag

#wondrous people - ask tag

#lookie!! - reblog tag

#gifts for otto - things made for otto

#hat collection - reblog chains/rps

thank you bunnysrph for the dividers!!!

#tf2 rp #joyous! wondrous!#happy to see you!#kannst du mich verstehen?#at your service!#quit bugging me.#wondrous people #lookie!!#gifts for otto #hat collection #physically xyz mercs #physically robotic medic

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thepunkmuppet · 3 months

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my girl celia really said have you ever heard of this one show it’s called the magnus archives and it’s a podcast distributed by rusty quill and licensed under a creative commo-

#celia ripley #the magnus archives #tma #tmagp #the magnus protocol #tmagp spoilers #the magnus protocol spoilers #tmagp 7 #girlie was REALLY going ham lmfao #i thought the writing for those lines was really clunky tbh she didn’t feel like she did last episode and it was very fanservicey #but yk what i’m a fan so thank you for your service 🫡#GOING INSANE

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roosterbruiser · 9 months

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wip poll tag game!

thank you for the tag @katsu28!! you're the best!!

rules: make a 24-hour poll with the names of your wips, let it run, then write one sentence for every vote the winner got.

no pressure tags: @laracrofted @sometimesanalice @bradshawsweetheart

#millie for you!#at your service!#games #tag games #wips

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elysieeh · 6 months

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