#in other news: fix your fucking posture. drink some fucking water. and go the fuck to bed if it’s late bc it’s for me rn. peace and light.
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People against piracy fail to realize that no, I can’t just ‘buy it.’ They stopped making DVDs and Blu-Rays. They’re barely offering digital copies for download. I am not spending money I could use for food or bills to pay for a subscription service just so I can always have access to a beloved piece of media. Especially not when the service will remove media on a whim without concern for how the loss of access to that piece will make its artistic conservation nigh impossible.
For example, I recently learned that Disney+ had an original film called Crater. It’s scifi, family friendly, and seems cool - I would love to buy it as a holiday gift for my little brother! But: it’s exclusive to D+ and THEY REMOVED IT LITERALLY MONTHS AFTER ITS RELEASE.
The ONLY way I can directly access this film is through piracy. The ONLY available ‘copies’ of this film are hosted on piracy websites. Disney will NEVER release it in theaters, or as something to buy, and it may NEVER return to the streaming service. It will be LOST because we aren’t allowed to purchase it for personal viewing. If I can’t pay to own it, I won’t pay for the privilege of losing it when corporate decides to put it in a vault.
So yes, I’m going to pirate and support piracy.
#ra speaks#piracy#media piracy#pirate to make hondo ohnaka proud#obligatory ‘don’t fucking pirate small authors/artists works wtf dude’ statement.#anyone who’s seen my media bitching before knows I’m a hype man for indie films this ain’t about them#this is about corporate streaming services killing physical media bc sales numbers are less impressive than number of streams#edit: USAmericans stop telling me to buy DVDs and blurays at Walmart. think outside your borders for a hot sec. fun thought exercise.#your experiences are not universal#edit: WHO GOT THIS TO 100k. I JUST WANT TO TALK (this post is my second to hit 100k woahg.)#in other news: fix your fucking posture. drink some fucking water. and go the fuck to bed if it’s late bc it’s for me rn. peace and light.
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2017 Tom with f! Reader literally js smut!
If your comfortable!!💞💞
slay.
pairings : 2017 t.kaulitz smut
synopsis : you just got out of a relationship, meaning you were at the bar, trying to get your mind off of it. You suddenly meet a guy, actually forgetting what you came there for. Let’s just say you weren’t expecting to forget your past in one night.
warnings : one night stand?, p in v, degradation, rough/ kinda sweet sex?, sweet tom, pillow princess, unprotected sex, hair pulling, implied second round, usage of “baby, sweetheart, princess”.
a/n : YALL IM SO UPSET. I actually lost a few followers from not posting in a while, I’ll try to post more often now! Love you angels.
-> IT WAS A GLOOMY EVENING at the bar in your town, nothing too exciting, just normal people having fun and drinking. You sat down, ordering drinks, wanting nothing more than to release some stress.
You drank your drink, ordering another, after another. A man sat beside you, ordering your same drink. You look at him up and down, silently admiring him as you fixed your posture.
He saw you staring, smirking slightly. “Do I have something on my face?” He chuckled, as you clear your throat, your cheeks heating up in embarrassment.
“No, sorry. I’ve just never seen you here before.” You smile, taking a sip of your drink. You couldn’t deny that he was handsome as fuck, from his man bun to his outfit and body.
He smiled, as he drank his drink. “Just decided to go to a new place, last one was kind of boring me out.” He winked, smiling. You giggle softly, as he brought out a hand for you to shake.
“I’m Tom, you?” He smirked, eyeing you up and down teasingly. You shook his hand, blushing softly. “It’s y/n, nice to meet you.” You giggled. He chuckled, getting up.
You both talk for minutes, getting along and being able to communicate great. Until he stood up, smirking at you, “why don’t we take this back to my place? Im sure we can get along more.” He smiled.
You smile, nodding as he got the bill, signing it as he winked at you whilst smirking. He took your hand, leading you to his car. You drove to his place, singing some songs together, laughing and talking.
As you got to his apartment, you took off your heels and waited for him to say something. He smiled, leading you to the couch, “go ahead and sit, make yourself at home. Oh, and the best view of the city is at the end of the couch or balcony.” He smirked, walking to the kitchen.
You sat down on the couch, admiring the view. He came back with some wine, and two glasses. “Care to drink more?” He teased, sitting beside you.
You hit his arm playfully, taking the glass and taking a sip. “This is good, is this Riesling?” You smiled, taking another sip. “mhm, glad someone knows what I’m serving them.” He chuckled.
You remember your ex, knowing this is his favourite. You sigh, placing the glass down. Tom notices, confused. “Is something bothering you, sweetheart?” He smiled, rubbing your back.
“No, it’s just that— this is my ex’s favourite wine.” You giggled softly, your eyes watering up. He took your hand, rubbing his thumb over your soft skin. “Im sorry, y/n. I didn’t mean to.” He whispered, rubbing your back.
“It’s fine, Tom. It’s not your fault.” You smiled, rubbing his hands. You and him stare at each other, eyes filled with desire and lust. He leaned in, pulling you into a kiss.
You smile, returning the kiss. You wrapped your arms around his neck, as he pulls you closer by the waist. He groaned softly, “are you okay with this, princess?” He placed hot kisses up and down your neck.
You moan softly, nodding. Without another word, he carries you to his bedroom as you yelp in surprise. “t-tom!” You gasp.
You get to his room, as he laid you down on his bed. He quickly strips you out your clothes, smirking and maintaining eye contact with you.
You squirm, blushing as he strips as well. He pulls you into a kiss, moaning softly as he rubs his tip on your wet folds. “You want this, hmm baby?” He coed, teasing.
You let out a moan, whimpering softly. “y-yes, please tom.” You gasp, your hands falling to his back, as he slammed his girth into you. His head falls back, groaning.
“shit, princess. s’tight f’me..” he smirked, chuckling. He pulled your hair, pounding into you roughly. You squeal, moaning as your eyes rolled back in ecstasy. He chuckled at your face, kissing the corner of your lips.
“Yeah baby, you like that?” He moaned, pounding into you. You could only respond with pathetic moans, whimpers and whines. He smirked, feeling you tighten around him.
“you close, sweetheart— hmngh.. fuck! taking me s’well.. such a dumb girl.” He moaned, pounding into you faster. You moan, “m’close, tom. please!” You whimper.
Your tongue lolls out as you cum all over his cock, moaning and shaking. He groans, pulling out and cumming all over your breasts and stomach.
He chuckled, slapping your cheek gently as he saw your eyes droopy.
“Not finished yet, sweetheart. Gonna fuck this pussy till’ I get tired.”
well, let’s just say you stayed the night, forgetting about your stupid ex.
YALL IM SO SORRY, I LOVE YOU ALL. THIS WAS REALLY SHORT, IM SO SORRYYY! I LOVEYOUALL, STAY SAFE ANGELS.
#tokio hotel#tom kaulitz#bill kaulitz#georg listing#gustav schäfer#tom kaulitz x reader#tom kaulitz fluff#tom kaulitz smut#bill kaulitz angst#bill kaulitz smut#one night stand#wine
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Habits Never Die (Rose Lavelle x Reader)
A/N: This fic idea has been on my mind for a while now and I’m just now writing it lol (: Enjoy!
You were sitting on a blanket in front of a body of water in Tacoma, Washington. Your friend sitting next to you, a friend who wasn't a friend for a long time.
“So we’re good” You ask as you support yourself on your elbows. Your now friend again sitting next to you.
“We’re good, catching up with you really means a lot to me. I think we both needed that closure of a chapter.” Your friend says which makes you laugh.
You fix your posture which reveals your Rose Lavelle jersey that you bought at an OL Reign game. Unbeknownst to you, a pair of uswnt members were also sitting and enjoying the view as they were in the area for an upcoming game against the OL Reign.
“Hey look it's a Rose jersey. Sick.” Tobin says. Christen turns her head to spot the jersey Tobin kept talking about.
“Aw that’s cute.” Christen says as she pulls her phone.
For being private people, Christen unlocked her phone to attempt to take a picture of you.
“Rose did say if anyone of us finds her a qualified person to go on a date to let her know right?” Christen asks Tobin.
“Yes, but-.”
“She’s perfect for Rose, well dressed, clearly a fan of Rose. By the pride wristband, I’d say she’s qualified.” Christen says. Tobin shakes her head as she doesn’t know what to do.
“Here, do as I say. Just shoot her a text to come, we did see her on the way here.” Tobin says. Christen nods her head as she shoots Rose a text to come over and “spend” some time with them.
Meanwhile you were continuing to talk to your friend. Grabbing your camera you took some pictures of the view and taking some pictures of your friend.
“I have to get going, but let’s do this more often, it’s nice to have you around again. I forgot and missed how much of a ray of sunshine you are for me.” Your friend says making you chuckle.
“Let’s make it a weekly thing.” You say and your friend nods as she gives you a hug. You are then left alone, laying down, looking up and seeing clouds, it’s definitely going to rain, but what's new.
You soaked up all the fresh air, enjoying a nice Thursday evening. Your Red Bull in one hand and a leftover slice of pizza on the other. Perfect.
“Fuck am I single.”
Meanwhile the two players behind you suddenly realize that maybe you were on a date and they definitely screwed up.
“We didn’t think this through.” Christen says, Tobin shaking her head rapidly.
“It wasn't my idea. It wasn't my idea. It wasn't my idea.” Tobin repeats.
“Damn it.” You shout as you drop part of your drink on the jersey. “Such an idiot. Too precious to get dirty and what do I do? Get it dirty.”
Tobin and Christen continue to panic as they now try to make something up for calling Rose to “spend” time with them, not that they didn’t want to spend time with her but they had other intentions when they had called her.
You try to dry the jersey but it was too cold to bare with at the moment. You slip the jersey off of your body, but while doing so someone comes up to you.
“Hi, are you interested in a flyer for a new coffee shop that’s opening next week?” A girl asks you and you nod.
“Cool. You guys have any tea? I love coffee but not as much as I love tea.” You say. The girl flips the flyer over for you and you chuckle as you see the menu. “Well that’s smart.”
“Hope to see you there.” The girl says as she walks behind you and towards the two players.
“Yeah for sure.” You say and go back to doing your own thing.
Meanwhile behind you, something else was going on.
“Hey guys, what's up.” Rose says as she stands in front of the two women.
“Sit down and enjoy the view with us.” Christen says as she scoots over to make some room for Rose.
“The view is great here, lots of dogs pass by here all the time. It’s great.” Rose says.
“Hi are you guys interested in a flyer for a coffee shop that’s about to open next week?” The girl asks the now three women.
“Oh we’re not from here.” Tobin says, motioning to herself and Christen.
“You two may not be from here BUT I will gladly take one because I am from here, well I live here.” Rose says as she grabs the flyer from the girl. “Do you guys have breakfast sandwiches?”
The girl once again flips the flyer but this time for Rose.
“That’s convenient.” Rose says as she looks over the menu.
“That’s funny, that’s like almost what the girl behind me said. She also said something along the same question, very similar.” The girls says motioning behind her to where you are. You were shirtless and trying to find a hoodie in your bag. Rose laughs as she hears the coincidence.
“Thank you, I’ll be sure to go.” Rose says. The girl nods her head and leaves. Rose turns around to face the two women who are talking amongst each other. “You guys wanna see some pictures of Wilma? They’re great I promise.”
“Sure.” Tobin says. Rose goes to grab her phone when she lets go of the flyer.
“No!” Rose shouts as she tries to run in her flip flops.
You hear a sudden no and turn around to see a very pale person running for a piece of paper. You quickly forget trying to find a hoodie, and run to grab the paper. You run and grab the piece of paper before it would be falling into the water. You get up and see you’ve scratched your stomach from sliding on the concrete.
“Here you go.” You say as you hand the woman the paper. “Oh hey it’s the flyer.” You look up and see it’s the one person you’ve absolutely swooned for.
“Thanks.” Rose says as she grab the flyer from you.
You blank and stand there in awe as you rapidly blink. A smile forms on your face as you register who you’re talking to.
“Sorry about your stomach.” Rose says.
“Oh that? Pfft I’ve been through worse, don’t worry about it. If I would’ve known it was the flyer for that coffee shop I would’ve just let you take a picture of my flyer.” You say as you put your hands in your pockets, fidgeting with the small coin you have. A habit you had picked up as a kid, usually happened when you got nervous.
“You live around here?”
“Born and raised here, well not here but around here.” You say quickly. “But I’ve lived here in the state my whole life. Love the Pacific Northwest. You?”
“I’m here for work, I think I’ll be here for maybe three years? Maybe more, I kinda like it here.”
“That’s cool. Yeah it’s great, lots of places to explore if you look for it right.” You say nodding your head. “Helps that this state is just so beautiful and helps me with my work.”
“What do you do for work?”
“I’m a photographer.” You say nodding you head as you rock back and forth on your heels.
“Oh no way! My friend over there is a photographer too, she’s kind of new to it but she’s good at it.” Rose says pointing behind her.
“That’s cool.” You say and Rose nods her head. “I actually have my camera with me if you maybe want to see some pictures I’ve taken?”
“Yes! You got any pictures of dogs?” Rose asks and you laugh.
“I do, I have a lot. I take pictures of many things, that sounds kinda creepy. I swear I’m not a creep.”
You both walk over to where you had your bag with your stuff. Your eyes widen as you see the jersey is out in the open.
“Wait a minute.” Rose says as she looks at you. “That’s my name.”
“Look I swear I didn’t do what I did just because it’s you. I swear I didn’t know it was you, it just so happened to be you.” You ramble as you try not to creep Rose out. “I just thought it would be better if you know I didn’t go all like ‘dude you’re Rose Lavelle let me get an autograph’ because I do believe it’s kinda wrong if you’re just trying to enjoy your time out”
“Creeped out? Oh god no, I just don’t really see my jersey around much. That’s awesome. Hey guys look she has my jersey!” Rose shouts as she grabs the jersey and shows the two women.
You look up to see Christen Press and Tobin Heath.
“Oh my god.”
The two women look up who quickly give Rose a thumbs up and a smile.
You quickly grab your camera from your bag so you don’t seem too shocked to see two of your many favorite players. You turn your camera on as you show Rose the pictures you’ve taken.
“Wow, these are so cool. Is this at the market place?” Rose asks and you nod your head.
“Yeah, I’ve also gone up on the big wheel to take pictures, the ferry, even the space needle. I get great pictures.” You say as you show Rose more pictures. While Rose looks at the pictures you take the time to finally put a hoodie on.
“Here come meet my friends, like I said one of them is a photographer.” Rose says as she leads you towards the two women who look like they definitely don’t want to be bothered but it’s Rose. “Tobin she’s a photographer, she takes good pictures. She’s like super good at it by the pictures she’s shown me.”
“I wouldn’t say that.” You say. Rose asks if she can show Tobin your pictures in which you obviously say yes because how do you say no to her, she’s so sweet.
“These are sick.” Tobin says.
“Oh, I’m Y/N I guess I should’ve started with that.” You say as you put your hands in your pockets again. “Nice to meet you.”
“I’m Christen, that’s Tobin.” Christen says and you gulp.
“Nice to meet you. Big fan.”
“We have a company, I don’t know if you’ve heard of it but it’s called Re inc. We could really use a photographer like you.” Tobin says as she looks at you then Christen. “I can’t do all the photography and I’m not the best at it either.”
“Hey woah, we just met this person. I just found someone who loves dogs as much as I do and lives here, someone that isn’t famous, I think. Are you famous?” Rose asks you and chuckle shaking your head.
“I’m nowhere near famous.” You say. “But yes I’ve heard of re inc, I love the purpose of the company. It’s inspiring.”
“She’s perfect for you Rose.” Christen says.
“Huh?” You ask.
“We’re not on the same page here. But how about you give me your number and I can contact you for maybe some photoshoots?” Tobin asks and you smile widely. “Would you like that? Because I’d love to have you on the team.”
“I’d love that. Yes.” You say quickly as you and Tobin exchange numbers.
Meanwhile Christen pulls Rose aside.
“She’s cute huh?” Christen whispers to Rose.
“Christen don’t you like have Tobin?” Rose whispers in disbelief.
“What? I’m talking about you! Don’t act like you two weren’t flirting.” Christen whispers making Rose laugh.
“She’s cute I’ll admit it.” Rose says.
“It was nice meeting you all, but I need to head home to finish my work.” You say as you shake all their hands.
“Lovely meeting you Y/N.” Christen says and you smile.
“Likewise.” You say. “Bye.”
“Bye.” The three women say.
You walk back towards your stuff, packing everything up so you can go home to editing your pictures. You pick everything up and look back to the three women. You bite the inside of your cheek when you take a deep breath and walk back over to them.
“This is going to sound weird but Rose would you li-.”
“Yes.” Rose says instantly before you could even finish your sentence.
“You didn’t even let me finish.” You say laughing.
“Sorry it’s a habit. Okay then, finish.” Rose says and you feel your cheeks heat up.
“Would you like to maybe go out to grab some coffee at that new place that’ll open next week?” You ask.
“Yes.” Rose says with a smile.
“Cool. Well umm, here’s my number.” You say handing her a piece of paper. “Just shoot me a message so I know it’s you.”
Rose quickly grabs her phone and texting you.
Unknown: It’s Rose (:
“Cool.” You say with a smile. “I’ll see you soon then.”
“Yes.”
The following week came by and sure enough you both hit it off good. Laughter and a small trip to the market place. Buying her a bouquet of flowers, roses specifically.
Days turned into weeks, which turned into months, which turned into years, which turned into and I do in front of your friends and family.
Rose learned about your habit and she also found it cute but made sure you were okay when you stuck your hand into your pocket. An easy sign she could always pick up on if you were nervous.
Rose would once again interrupt someone before they finished talking. That being the wedding officiant which would be Christen. Rose didn’t wait for Christen to say the line when she blurted out I do. She had a habit of doing that and you loved it, something you learned by the third date you went on, you thought it was cute. But Rose interrupting Christen is something you always remember.
“Do you Y/N Y/L/N take Rosemary Kathleen Lavelle as your wife?”
“I do.” You say with a smile. One hand in your pocket as you felt the coin inside your pocket.
“And do you Rosemary Kathleen Lavelle take Y/-.”
“I do.” Rose says cutting Christen off.
“Seriously? You didn’t let her finish.” You say laughing. “How am I not surprised?”
“It’s a habit.” Rose says making you all laugh. Then pulls your hand out of your pocket. “Just like you have this habit.”
“Habits never die.” You whisper and laugh as you look at Rose.
Her habit never went away, neither did yours. When you were about to announce that you two were adopting a baby, Rose once again blurted the news out before she was supposed to. It was only the beginning for you both. But Rose’s habits never die and you loved her for it. Just like she loved you for your habit of having a coin in your pocket.
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Impromptu Review
Thanks for editing this one goes to momirene and Worldsover, and for helpful beta reading feedback from them and one dork who wants to remain anonymous.
Tags: TheLounge, Red Velvet, SNSD (Girl's Generation), Joy, Sunny, loneliness, potential traumatization of cats, a hoard of hell-themed sex toys, a strap on, a butt plug with Jiu's face in it, and bisexual problems.
The front door of Sunny’s apartment swung open so fast that Joy felt a breeze from the vacuum it left behind.
“Joy! You’re here!”
Joy blinked. “Yeah, I said I would come over.”
“It’s been so long since we’ve met up! Come in, come in!”
“It’s only been like a month though.”
Sunny grabbed Joy’s hands and pulled her through the doorway. “It feels like so much longer than that!”
Joy smiled and took her shoes off in the entryway. “You seem more excited than usual.”
“What? How so?”
“Well for one,” Joy said, pointing at the kitchen, “It looks like you prepared for a whole party in here.”
The kitchen’s island was covered in plates of snacks and several variations of alcoholic beverages. Additionally, Sunny was noticeably sweaty, like she had just run around the house preparing for guests. Joy figured it would be best not to bring that up.
“What? No. That? That’s… yeah, that’s a lot of food, isn’t it?” Sunny’s posture drooped, as if she’d already expended all of her energy on her greeting.
Joy pulled her into a side hug. Her height served to straighten Sunny back up. “What’s going on, girl?”
Sunny sighed and leaned her head on Joy’s chest. “I dunno. I’m just excited. Haven’t had a good social night any time recently.”
“Aw! But what about these cutie kitties?”
Sogeum popped her head out from behind the wall and gave Joy her signature droopy, grim stare without so much as a meow. As soon as Joy shuffled in her direction though, she turned and went back into the living room.
“Well, you know. Can’t really have a real conversation with the cats.”
Joy hummed her agreement and stepped into the kitchen. “I’m always happy to talk to you Sunny. They don’t call SM a family for nothing.”
Sunny groaned, loudly.
“Um. Okay,” Joy said when Sunny didn’t elaborate. “Not a family? Just a bunch of really close friends?”
“Yeah, that’ll work better. Not a fan of the family motif.”
Joy picked up a cracker and chomped down. “Gonna… explain? Family is normally a positive thing, isn’t it?”
Sunny grabbed a bottle of wine and yanked the cork out. “Yeah, totally, for sure. Hey, do you like Chardonnay?”
“I…” Joy didn’t want to skirt around whatever issue Sunny was having, but was well-aware of her stubbornness. “I sure do.”
As fancy glasses of white wine were generously poured, Joy made note of Sunny’s slow, unsteady movements. She worried that perhaps Sunny had already started drinking, or wasn’t getting enough sleep.
* * *
“Can you believe that, Joy?”
“No way. It’s just inhuman.”
“Completely! It’s not like green onions are suddenly more expensive to dry out!”
The conversation had started with gossip and cheese snacking when the sun was high. As the sun set, the discussion shifted to the price of instant meals, and the snack plates were all but empty. Joy had to fight the constant urge to fall asleep, as the topics were never much more interesting than that. But she let Sunny lead the talking as much as possible.
Joy was simply relieved that Sunny called her over before diving into her liquor storage. “You should start a petition to regulate the price. I’d be the first to sign it.”
Sunny’s tipsy grin matched Joy’s. Though the alcohol consumption had been slow-going, they had been doing it for several hours. “Oh that would be great press. ‘Washed up idol upset with ramen manufacturers.’”
With an exaggerated roll of the eyes, Joy pointed at a set of boxes in the corner of the living room, currently being used as a lookout tower by Sogeum. “You’re not washed up yet. Look at all of those sponsor gifts. Those weren’t here last time I came over… Wait, they weren’t, were they?”
Sunny giggled. “No, they’re, uh… new.”
Their corporate sponsors weren’t something that Joy, Sunny, or any of the other SM idols discussed often. There were usually so many vying for their attention that it was pointless trying to keep track. But Joy reasoned, somewhat drunkenly, that talking about it might be therapeutic to someone so down on their social status. “Who are they from, anyway?”
A blush deepened the red of Sunny’s already tipsy-glowing cheeks. “Uh… Nobody. Just a regular sponsor, ya know?”
Joy grinned. “Oh, come on. You can tell me. What am I gonna do? Call a press conference to tell the tabloids who’s contributing to your paycheck?”
Sunny rolled her eyes. She shot off the couch, spilling a drop or two of her wine in the process. From Joy’s naturally higher perspective, Sunny didn’t seem that much taller. “Fine,” she said, wobbling, “but you better not make fun of me.”
“I’ll make fun of you for other reasons, like how much I love you, bitch!” Joy blinked at her own shouting. She didn’t know when the alcohol had hit her, but she was beginning to think that she was a little more intoxicated than she previously thought.
Thankfully, the joviality in her voice seemed to encourage Sunny to play along. She set her wine on the coffee table and picked one of the smaller boxes off of the pile. “Disclosure first! We haven’t agreed to any deals yet. They sent me this stuff to try to convince me to shill it. I didn’t reach out to them.”
Joy waved the disclosure off like a mosquito, but Sunny still tossed the box in her direction. The weight inside of it was awkwardly distributed. Joy attempted to catch it, but it wound up ricocheting off the tips of her fingers and nearly knocking over an open, mostly full bottle of soju.
“The fuck is in this thing?”
“I’ve got some ideas but I just know who it’s from. Open it and find out.”
Joy tore into the box with no regard for the care that went into the packaging, which itself was surprisingly discreet. A smirk cracked her lips when she thought about what sorts of deliveries required such discretion. But the smirk faded right away when she got a view of the inside and realized that the packager apparently had the same idea.
Inside was a pair of plastic sheets wrapped asymmetrically around a roughly water bottle sized blob of blood red silicone. A small bit of pink cardboard advertised it as a five-speed, rotation-simulating, self-cleaning, pattern-switching, USB-charging, automatically-lubricating, remote-controlled vibrator with a speaker at the bottom for replicating a set of desired moans and a specialized charging dock.
Joy cleared her throat and stared at the horrifically fancy dildo, and its label, “Dante’s Dive,” unsure if she should toss it back to Sunny, considering it was clearly a personal item.
Sunny reached into what was left of the box, procuring a pretty little decorated card. “Dear Ms. Lee, we at Second Ring Inc were very pleased to hear your impromptu review of our products on a recent episode of ‘Welp, I Guess We’re Talking About This Now’ and wished to send you some additional items to show our appreciation. These are in no way a request for further public review,” Sunny was briefly interrupted by Joy’s disapproving snort, “but should you be interested in a partnership, we have included a phone number at which I, the chief executive officer, Lee Youngjoon, may be reached. Optionally, my username--”
Joy missed a few words as she was shocked by the extreme sound emitted by the vibrator when she pushed a button on the remote control.
“--is ‘worldsover’. As you know, Second Ring specializes in sexual wellness products, of which we’ve sent you a wide variety. They can be enjoyed by couples, or can serve as a fantastic outlet for power singles like yourself…”
Sunny trailed off. Joy was afraid she knew what was coming. “Damn, Sunny. You say so much as three words on national television and they scramble to get right up on your ass, eh?”
It was too late. Sunny was already tipping up the bottom of the soju bottle. A few drops spluttered back out of her mouth as Joy pushed it back down. “Sunny! You’ve said it yourself! You don’t want to get married!”
“Doesn’t mean I’m not still lonely!”
Joy wrapped her arms around Sunny. “You’ve got me. And a million other friends!”
“Fans don’t count.” Sunny’s voice was partially muffled by Joy’s shoulder.
“Ouch. Time for me to delete my Sone club membership. But fine. A hundred other friends. It’s not just me. It’s my members. Your members. And plenty of others. All of NCT would be--Okay, nevermind. Aespa though! They love you too.”
“But I don't want to inconvenience you." Sunny ended so matter-of-factly that Joy had to pause to process the short conversation.
"You know how… You know how you take a road trip, and there's a road block, or really bad construction, and you have to take a detour?"
"Yeah. I'm a detour."
"Come on, Sunny. What you are is the scenic route!”
There was a long silence.
“Was that the end of the metaphor?” Sunny eventually asked.
“I am very drunk.”
“You’re not that drunk.”
“Drunk enough to be shit at metaphors.”
“It’s…” Sunny extricated herself from Joy’s hug. “It’s okay. I think I know what you’re getting at, and I appreciate it. It’s just that a few words don’t really fix a brain, you know?”
Joy nodded slowly, watching as Sogeum casually stalked across the room. “Yup. But believe me. I’m here for you, at least. So if you need a friend, or some company, I’m at the top of your list.”
The cat plopped herself on the floor, right up against Sunny’s leg. Joy giggled. “Fuck off, kitty. I just said I was the top.”
It seemed the topic of conversation was ready to change. Sunny smiled, and it was enough to indicate her understanding.
“So!” Joy moved things along. “A pile of free, top of the line sex toys in your living room. What’s a young woman to do about that?”
Sunny snorted. “Well I’m not going to masturbate while I have company over, that’s for sure.” She grabbed another box from the pile and handed it over, doing her best not to disturb Sogeum’s new resting place.
The new box took mere seconds to open, this time revealing a black silicone butt plug with a red gem in the base. The casing suggested that a picture could be inserted beneath the gem, and it appeared there was one already there as an example. Joy had to flip it around to a variety of angles before she could make out that it contained a headshot of Dreamcatcher’s Jiu making finger hearts on her cheeks. She cocked her head, wondering if the image had actually been authorized.
Another box swapped between the womens’ hands. It took Joy a little longer to open than the last, but it turned out to be that way for a good reason, given that it was gently holding some fragile cargo: A red-tinted glass bottle of lube, labeled as “Juice from the Fruit of The Tree.” The lengthy product title had a snake winding through the letters.
“Well now they’re just really doubling down on this theme, aren’t they?” Sunny asked as she worked out how to open the next package, using her bottle opener as a makeshift knife.
Joy laughed and picked up yet another, now eager to see what kind of wild object it would contain. “Yeah, they really are! No lie, they���re starting to give me some ideas. Talk about sinful.”
“‘Oh I know,’” Sunny mocked the company, as SM artists often did, fingers still struggling to find their way under the first cardboard flap. “‘Let’s send Sunny a whole pile of sex junk. Bet she’s sinful enough to use it all.’ Like, come on Love-eye, or whatever your name is. What’s a single woman gonna do with all this? Hold up a pillow fort?”
“Hey, maybe he doesn’t know you’re single. Maybe there’s some stuff in here that takes two to tangle with… Fuck. Choerry’s got me using alliterations.”
Sunny barely managed to get her fingers inside the box, but her knuckles were turning white from the tightness of it. It seemed that she had left a portion of the packing tape uncut. “I said I was single on the show, though. I don’t think there will be any couples’ toys in here.”
“Oooh, I’m gonna make it a bet now.” Joy smirked. Her next sentence bypassed her verbal filter through the holes left in it by the alcohol. “If you get that thing open and there’s a strap on inside, you have to fuck me with it!”
A jerk of her arms snapped the remainder of the packing tape. Sunny chuckled. “You’re on. There’s no way it is.”
Joy had to admit that Sunny had a point, considering how small the package was. Surely it couldn’t fit a series of leather straps, or a dildo any larger than a couple of inches in any direction. The little voice in the back of her mind that told her making such an offer was stupid quieted down somewhat.
There was a moment of quiet. Sogeum rolled away from Sunny and made her way to the kitchen. Joy picked up another box, confident that she hadn’t just placed herself in an awkward situation. Sunny shook her head, amused. And then…
“J-Joy?”
Joy looked back, but wasn’t quite sure what she was looking at. It was a sort of mass of black string with some silver discs hanging off of it. Another piece of pink paper fluttered to the floor, where Joy picked it up and read aloud.
“‘The Obol.’ As Charon ferried Dante across the Styx and into the hole that is Hell, so too shall this state-of-the-art magnetic harness ferry our exclusive Dante’s Dive dildo into your… partner’s hole…”
There was more to be read, but both women seemed to get the point. The only sound in the room came from Sogeum chomping through some hard cat food in the kitchen. Slowly, their eyes raised and met. They both spoke at the same moment.
“That was a bet’s a joke bet right?”
Their drunken minds needed a moment to detangle their words into distinct sentences. Sunny’s “That was a joke, right?” and Joy’s “A bet’s a bet.”
Sunny started again first. “You know, we don’t have to.”
“I will if you want to.”
Every sentence being exchanged was followed by a palpable stillness. Joy’s heart beat loudly in her own ears, and she swore she could hear Sunny’s too.
“Do you… want to fuck me with that, Sunny?”
Sunny answered instantly. “Yup.”
There was a flurry of action, though it was slowed here and there by a tipsy stumble or two. Sunny gathered up an armful of the items on her coffee table, both sex toys and the bottle of soju, and sprinted for the bedroom. Joy rushed after her, messily attempting and failing to remove some of her clothes on the way.
Sogeum was spooked by the sudden kerfuffle and fled out of sight.
The bedroom was no less hectic. Sunny dropped everything on the bed except the soju, which she took one more swig of directly from the bottle before setting it dangerously close to the edge of her desk. She wiggled out of her shirt and bra, which attracted Joy’s attention instantly.
Joy struck at Sunny’s cleavage, wrapping her fingers as far as they could go around the legendary orbs, and her lips around one of the budding tips. Their differences in height made it awkward, but they very soon found their way to a horizontal state that eased that tension. Unfortunately, it was not on the bed, but on the floor, but they weren’t about to let something like that stop them.
What clothes they were still wearing exploded off their bodies. Joy’s shorts and shirt, Sunny’s pants and socks. All of it ended up in different sections of the room, thrown under and over furniture.
Joy was no stranger to encounters like this, and neither was Sunny. They had shared countless stories with each other… and some spit. But neither had considered their prior make out sessions to be precursors to explicitly sexual action. For her part, however, Joy considered this one differently, and Sunny’s hands searching half-blindly for Joy’s ass confirmed to her that Sunny thought the same.
Backs arched. Legs ground against one another. Open mouths met, trading the alcoholic scents that the women no longer cared to distinguish. Their minds had devoted themselves entirely to the search for physical pleasure.
A lot of exploratory prodding led Sunny’s fingers to the entrance to Joy’s pussy, failing to notice the number of pokes that ended up at Joy's exit. She took some time familiarizing herself with the drenched outer folds.
Joy, however, noticed the poking at her ass. Her mind swam with serotonin, thoughts of other people, and alcoholic fumes that seemed to rearrange the letters of her thoughts into nonsense. Or possibly into inspiration.
Inspiration relevant to the happenings at the prior year's award shows, that is.
Joy tried to pull back the moment Sunny’s fingers dipped inside her. She had opened her mouth to speak but instead groaned and arched herself further into Sunny’s grip on her sanity. "S-Sunny. B-bed."
At least that message was received loud and clear. Sunny dragged her fingers against Joy’s G-spot as she, disappointingly, pulled them out, nearly causing Joy to scream. The same fingers plunged into Joy’s mouth and quieted her as she diligently sucked her own juices from them.
The action transferred to the bed. Fingers immediately found their places again, and Joy bounced on her back in time with Sunny’s brutal shoves. Packaging bounced all around them. It was like a desperate, distracted game of Vegetable Shinobi for Joy, swiping at the jumping dildo. Sunny’s fingers were divine, eye-wateringly so, but Joy wanted something unholy.
Sunny muttered Joy’s name, catching her attention again. She lifted her head to meet for yet another imprecise kiss. Their legs twisted around each other. Joy could hear the desperation in Sunny’s moans, vibrating all the way down her throat, burning like the alcohol. She snaked a hand between them and found Sunny’s clit.
The moans freed themselves as Sunny bucked backward, almost out of Joy’s longer reach. Joy noted the exceptional reaction, and flipped Sunny onto her back, following immediately and putting herself in the position of power Sunny had initiated.
“You’re gonna fuck me with the strap on… right, Sunny?”
Sunny’s eyes widened, and she grabbed the toys.
“No, not yet,” Joy stalled in her most seductive voice. She slid down, nearly falling off the bed, and wrenched Sunny’s legs wide open with her elbows.
Sunny clenched her fingers around the hell-themed dildo for dear life. Joy’s name poured through her lips over and over again as Joy’s lips poured over her pussy.
Joy had to fight Sunny’s strength to keep her spread thighs from clamping around her head. She wanted to keep hearing her senior beg, loud and clear. To that end, she dug in her tongue, unable to penetrate far, but far enough to open Sunny up and feel the wetness flow into her mouth.
“Please… Joy… I’m close… Joy, please! Joy, don’t stop!”
The thought flitted through Joy’s head, that perhaps denying Sunny her orgasm would be fun, but something about the way she said it made Joy wonder if Sunny’s neediness was rooted in her loneliness, more than in her desire to get off. She shifted herself to wrap her arms under Sunny’s legs and pulled. It wasn’t possible for them to be any physically closer than they were, but she wanted to make it feel like they could be.
Sunny’s voice cracked, choked, and broke into a scream. Joy winced as her tongue was squeezed uncomfortably, but she wasn’t about to stop. The back arches, hair grasping, and pained gasps that followed were worth it.
Joy kept it up until Sunny’s body fell back down and her muscles relaxed. Only then, she removed herself to ask, “Need a break before my turn?”
A smile crept up Sunny’s mouth. Her fingers tightened around the dildo she still had in her hand. “Get… back down here.”
If there was any benefit Joy appreciated most about idol training, it was recovery speed, and Sunny still had it. Joy picked up the strap, quickly figuring out how it was supposed to fit and sliding it up Sunny’s legs. The motion doubled as her approach for another make out.
Of course, Joy was still immensely horny. Her interest in making out with Sunny was overshadowed by her desire to get fucked savagely, but she had the wherewithal to hold out, to let it happen naturally. She was always good at letting others take the lead. Whether they led from the top or from the bottom didn’t especially matter to her.
The alcohol made her more impatient than usual though. She forced herself to wait for the five-speed pounding she’d get, but she ground herself against Sunny’s leg in the meantime. Thankfully she didn’t have to wait long. Sunny threw her to the side and attached the vibrator to the unusual strap with very little trouble. Joy fingered herself as she watched.
“Fuck, yes, Sunny. This is going to be so goo--”
Sunny practically tackled Joy. Their lips collided again, strap hovering somewhere between Joy’s legs, but not close enough for her to feel it.
The moment she did, though, Joy grabbed Sunny’s ass and pulled. The lack of accuracy was made up for by the inhuman amount of lubrication present; both Joy’s and the curious synthetic compound that the dildo exuded seemingly of its own volition.
It was almost too much for Joy. The dildo was certainly longer than any she had used before, and bottoming out at full speed meant it hit her rather painfully in the cervix. She hissed, but otherwise just readjusted her legs in Sunny’s way to prevent the same thing from happening so easily again.
The strap held the dildo in place on Sunny’s body well. Despite its genuinely small frame, it seemed to prevent all wiggling. Every one of Sunny’s movements, including the less delicate, more intoxicated ones, translated to sensations that felt to Joy like a biologically attached dick, albeit with a plethora of extra features.
"You're so pretty, Joy," Sunny said. Even though she was doing all the work now, she wasn't nearly as winded as before. Knowing she’d affected Sunny made Joy grin into another kiss.
“No you,” Joy said with a smirk. She knew this would be good, but she truly underestimated how great it would be to see Sunny’s famous tits jiggling with the effort of fucking her. The sheen of sweat covering them would ensure the night wouldn’t be forgotten, even if Joy had another drink or two.
Joy’s first orgasm struck quickly and unexpectedly. Her breath stopped and a shudder spiked through her body from her core to the tips of her toes and fingers and head. The ability to think normally left her for a brief moment. She only kept the fleeting question of whether or not Sunny was able to feel Joy’s climax. Stars popped in and out of existence, obscuring Joy’s view of Sunny’s fantastic body.
It all faded relatively soon after, but it wasn’t enough for Joy. As soon as her lungs refilled, she screamed, “More! Sunny! Fuck me! Fuck me! Oh god!” She was practically numb everywhere, except for every square inch of her that the dildo rubbed, slid, and vibrated against. Her arms and legs wrapped around Sunny on their own.
Joy, eyes half closed, barely registered when Sunny slowed down to grab and open the extra package. She did, however, notice the sudden prodding feeling at her asshole.
“Sun--”
She couldn’t even finish Sunny’s name before something slipped its way into her butt. Her vision cleared up enough to see that even while she continued thrusting, Sunny had one hand tucked between them, and it was the source of the extra intrusion.
A couple more thrusts though, and Joy was lost to the pleasure again. She started to pant instead of scream or moan, or perhaps she was whimpering, or speaking fluent Polish. Joy couldn’t have said one way or the other. Another orgasm hit. And another. And another. She knew some time was passing between each one, but whether it was seconds or days between no longer mattered. Her mind was fading out of existence.
Until, that is, it wasn’t.
With seemingly no provocation, Joy suddenly remembered Cheungae. She had been meaning to talk to Sunny about him before they had gotten drunk. Her mind wandered, far, far more than it normally would during such intense sex.
Cheungae had taken her out several times since their first, less-than-professional meeting at the MAMAs with Wheein. Even though Joy knew he was struggling financially, he always insisted on paying for coffee, but would give up if he saw the bill when Joy took him to some of the much higher end restaurants.
He was always so polite, genuine, and humble. He didn’t even question when Joy told him they couldn’t be in a relationship, but instead insisted that they could be friends. Joy wondered if it was fair to him that she was treating him as a boyfriend in every way but name while she was still having a grand old time fucking everyone else in the industry. Cheungae knew about it, but wasn’t part of it.
And yet, sex with Cheungae made Joy feel good. Great, even. She could recreate the sensations in her mind for days afterward. His slim, toned figure hovering over her, his face contorted beautifully in adorable agony, his admittedly mediocre cock managing to hit her just right with every move. She couldn’t stop picturing him.
Another orgasm smashed through Joy’s illusion. The mental image of perfectly human Cheungae was instantly replaced with the very physical image of god-like Sunny. As tended to happen, Joy held her breath as the climax coursed through her. Her muscles contracted until she was holding Sunny in a deathly grip.
“F-fuck. Sunn-ny. Slow… slow down.”
It seemed that the request was desperately needed by both lovers, because rather than simply slow down, Sunny fell over. Joy’s pussy immediately craved to be filled again, but she knew she needed to clear her head. And besides that, she still had an odd full sensation. When her muscles relaxed enough for her to move of her own volition, she reached beneath herself and recoiled again at the feeling of a drenched butt plug. Her fingertips carried a puddle of mixed cum and lube back up.
“I’m sorry… Joy… I think that’s all I have left in me,” Sunny said between gasps.
Joy made note of her own throat and how dry it was. Whatever sound she was making while she borderline hallucinated, she’d be regretting it for a while. “All good. I was losing my sanity. That was unbelievable.”
Sunny giggled. It sounded painful. “The vibrator… or the surprise plug?”
Joy giggled back. “The plug was definitely a surprise. Was that the one with Jiu's face in it?”
“Mhm.”
“Cool,” Joy sat up, her head swimming in the aftermath. “But I just think it was you using the stuff that made it so good.”
Sunny seemed invigorated by the compliments. She smiled and reached under the bed, making some noise and bringing up a bottle of water. The two of them swapped it back and forth until it was empty and then collapsed into one another, idly feeling each others' bodies up the whole time.
“Does that mean you’re up for another… night like this? Or day?” Sunny asked as she fondled Joy’s tits. It sounded like she had sobered up, at least most of the way. Joy was too afraid of what she would see to look at a clock.
“You fucking know it,” Joy responded while she brushed her fingers up and down Sunny’s inner thighs. It was a reflex for her to agree, but she cringed inwardly as soon as she did, realizing how much more sober she had become herself, and how she wished she wasn’t. She was thinking about Cheungae again.
There was a barrage of light kisses all over her face, neck, and chest. Sunny looked far too happy for Joy to feel okay about retracting her statement.
“Maybe not right now though,” Joy said, just in case Sunny was already getting ideas. “We should really get to bed.”
She didn’t hear any arguments. They simply got up, and only long enough to flip up the duvet, flinging all of the remaining sex toys off, and jumped underneath.
It took a minute for Joy to realize she needed to remove the surprise butt plug. It was easy enough, and she ended up tossing it to the floor without looking at it.
Joy wrapped herself around Sunny. She was usually the big spoon, not that it bothered her. Sunny’s bare back felt comfortably hot against her chest and stomach. Cheungae liked being the big spoon too. He’d swap with her all the time…
“Hey, Sunny?”
“Mmm?” Sunny was on the verge of sleep, it seemed.
Joy lowered her voice, barely above a whisper. “Have you ever thought about… Settling down, I guess? Just being with one person?”
She didn’t expect Sunny to have an immense store of wisdom, but she hoped for more than what she got: a snore.
“Good night to you too, Sunny.”
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“enemies?” - jj maybank (2)
-> jackpearcsn’s gif
part 1
summary: they both have to deal with the consequences of the night before, leading them to realize that maybe hate isn’t the only feeling they have towards each other.
warning: jj and y/n being mean, again
masterlist
“That Pogue deserves to get punished.” Rafe said once you and him arrived at his house.
After you told JJ to go home you had this weird feeling in your chest. It reminded you of the moment before going to ride a wave, but with a bad turn into it. “I don’t know who the fuck does he think he is. He doesn’t get to treat me like that and get away with it, Y/n, I swear I’m going to get my revenge on that stupid Pogue.”
“Rafe, what are we? Twelve? Just forget about it.” You said. When he turned and locked eyes with you, you felt shivers going down your body.
“Stop fucking defending him, Y/n.”
“I’m not defending him, I’m not defending anybody. I just don’t want you or anyone to start trouble.”
“Did you heard how he talked to me?” Rafe started walking closer to you, so close that you unintentionally took a step backwards.
“Yes, Rafe! I was there! This is an everyday thing, why are you so angry right now?” You asked but Rafe didn’t respond immediately. He stayed put in silence while looking at your eyes. You were so confused at his sudden change of behaviour that you didn’t know what to say. The realisation that you were at his house hit you when he took another step closer to you. Your mind was so focus on what happened moments earlier that you didn’t realize Rafe took you to his house. And how wrong that was.
Before you could say that you were going home, Rafe spoke. “That Pogue wants you.” He said firmly with anger in his tone. You blinked confused, trying to understand his train of thought.
“What?”
“I’ve seen how he looks at you.”
“You’re dreaming, Rafe, you can’t even see a thing that you have in front of you clear.”
“Do you like him?” He asked suddenly, getting closer to you. You could see the anger on his eyes, so clearly that your heart dropped to your stomach and a bad feeling coming through.
“What- no!”
“Prove it.” He said looking down to your lips for a second.
“Why would I want to prove it to you? We’re done, you made that pretty clear last time, Rafe.”
Rafe stayed silent, you thought that he was going to finally get over it and you were going to be able to get out, saying that it was getting late. But then when a little smile escaped his lips, you mouth didn’t open.
“Do you want to get back together?” He said with his eyes glued to your lips.
“Wha-”
“Let’s get back together.”
“What are you saying?”
“If you don’t like that Pogue, get back together with me.”
“That doesn’t make sense Rafe.” You said, trying to keep your posture together and not show that you were feeling afraid on that exact moment.
Rafe grabbed your cheek with strength, making it hurt a little bit. You thought he was going to get closer to your lips and kiss you, but when he came back to your eyes, you didn’t see the desire to kiss you in them. “Do you want it to make sense?”
“Y/n? Calling y/n to earth.” You heard your dad calling you making you step out of your thoughts.
“Dad! Sorry, it’s been a long night, I didn’t sleep well.”
“Well, you better get some sleep tonight because tomorrow it’s the party.” He said, giving a sip to the juice he was drinking for breakfast.
“Party?”
“Y/n!” He said loudly, annoyed at your question. “The party that I’ve been telling you all breakfast. There’s going to be a lot of business people there, it’s my opportunity to make an impression and make my company bigger, and more important.”
You closed your eyes trying to not sound or show any annoy expression to your dad. After everything that happened, going to a party wasn’t in your list of desired things to do. “Dad, do I have to go? I mean, I’m pretty sure I won’t have anything to do there.”
“No, you have to go, Y/n. You’re my daughter.”
“So?”
“So!?” Your dad yelled offended. “You need to make an impression too. We’re a family, and if we’re good, that means that I take the good in my family to the business.”
You sighed looking down hoping the conversation was over. “Alright.”
“You’ll have to pick a dress, do you understand?”
“Yes.”
“Good.” He said firmly.
You slowly got up from your chair leaving your almost full breakfast on the table. “Are we done?”
“Why?”
“I want to go surfing.”
“Surfing again?” You dad said that with so much disgust that you got the sudden need to walk away, tired of hearing anyone talk. “Why don’t you go with Rafe, I don’t know, on a date?” As soon as you heard his name, your heart dropped to your stomach. Something and someone you didn’t want to talk about. “I haven’t seen him in ages. And you know his dad is important, better keep your relationship in a good state.” You sighed trying to erase every word your dad was saying, since he rather be successful then watching you be alright. “Besides, you surfed yesterday.”
“So? Dad, I’m good at it.” You smiled for the first time in the conversation, remembering your times riding the waves. “I think I can go pro.”
“Pro?” He asked in a joking tone after letting out a little laugh. “Yeah, sweetheart, everybody has dreams. But you’ll work at the company with me, I need an heir.” You felt like a bucket of cold water had fell into your body. You took a deep breath while watching your dad walk towards you, once he finished his breakfast. “And I think you’re perfect for the job.” He grabbed your cheek and gave you a gentle kiss on the forehead. On the inside, you were glad the conversation was over, but once he stopped and stared at your reddish wound on your chin, your stomach turned. You didn’t told him about it, about anything. Better to stay quiet, you thought. A feeling of worry came into your chest when you couldn’t think of an excuse for it, but when you thought he was going to ask if you were alright, or what happened, he just let out a tiny sigh and let go of your chin. “You better get that fixed, honey, we don’t want to ruin your presence at the party with a horrible wound.”
Once you arrived in your room, you closed your door before letting out a big sigh while trying to take your heart to its normal speed. So much had happened over the past two days that you felt how your head wanted to explode. And if it did, you weren’t going to complain.
You sat down on the end of your bed as you were looking to the wall of your room. A sudden pain in your lower lip appearing made you remember the person who did it to you, just like before breakfast. You closed your eyes trying to forget everything but when he came into your mind, you opened them again. Him defending you against Rafe was now playing in your head, the anger in his eyes and the pain in his voice... How can someone forget that?
You dropped your back to your bed but once you heard a noise coming from your window, your head quickly turned to it to see a brunette girl already entering your room.
“Kie.” You said softly, walking towards her to help her get inside your room.
“Hi, Y/n,” she said with a smile once inside “how are you?”
“Good.” You nodded when a little smile escaped your lips.
“Are you sure?” She asked. You noticed how her eyes went to your wound for a couple of seconds. You didn’t want to lie to Kie, she was one of your best friends, the one that you could always count on, but right now, you didn’t want to talk about it.
“Yeah.” You said, trying to sound as convincing as possible. Kie nodded, going back to your wound once again. It’s like her eyes were trying to say to you that she wanted to know what was going on, but her mouth wasn’t opening. “It’s just a scratch.” You said almost in a whisper, once she came back to your eyes.
“What happened, Y/n?” She asked in the same tone, getting closer to you to grab your hands.
“Nothing,” you let go of her hands gently and stepped back “don’t worry about it.”
“Seems to be a thing to worry about if JJ reacted that way.” Kie said without hesitating, making you think of the night before.
“JJ always looks for a reason to fight Rafe, that’s nothing new.” You said, proudly of yourself for bringing the situation down so fast.
“Yeah, I know,” Kie nodded “but I’ve never seen him that angry, Y/n. And I haven’t seen him all day.” She stopped but you noticed she wanted to ask something else. Once she looked down wondering if she should say it or not, she looked up at you and let the words come out of her mouth. “What happened at the Chateau before that?”
Your mind immediately took you to the moment JJ was grabbing your chin, you and him close. Your breathing mixing with his, the heavy air surrounding the room, it was definitely something. But you just shook your head. “Nothing, Kie.”
“C’mon, I’m not stupid, Y/n.”
“I’ve never said you were.” You responded quickly. That took Kie off guard and just go quiet. You looked down and hoped for her to forget it, but then she spoke again.
“Did Rafe did that to you?” You looked up at her but then went back down again, hiding your wound.
“No.”
“Y/n-”
“Kie! C’mon, let it go.” You spited out.
“I can’t let it go! You’re hurt, Y/n-” Kie got closer to you, but before she could check your scratch, you stepped back moving her hand.
“Please! I don’t want to talk about it!”
“I can’t let that asshole treat you like that!” She yelled so loudly you immediately hoped your dad didn’t hear that. You started to feel a strong pain in your throat once the tears were fighting to come out when the memory of Rafe came into your head.
“I’m sorry for yelling.” Kie said more softly once she noticed the change in your body language.
You shook your head. “It’s alright. I’m sorry too.” Your softly tone changed the surroundings to a more calmer one. You noticed Kie wanted to know more about it, but she looked down to her feet, regretting her question.
“Are you coming to the party tomorrow night?” She asked still looking down.
“I have to. You?”
“Same.” She said looking at your eyes. You saw conflict in them, something that you always wanted to change in them, you didn’t like to see your best friend like that, but this time, you didn’t know how. “I miss you, Y/n. And I’m sure the guys do too.”
You let out a tiny laugh. “I’m not sure about that.”
Kie did the same and then nodded. “At least I’m sure about Pope and John B. Why don’t you come to the Chateau with me?”
The idea was tempting, but with that also came having to see JJ. And your head was telling that wasn’t a good idea. “I don’t think so, Kie.”
“Why not? Is it because of JJ?” She asked without thinking about it. “What happened between you two? You’ve never turned down a meeting with the Pogues because of him.”
You let out a tiny sigh while going to sit down at the end of your bed, your legs were starting to betray you. “It’s not him.”
Kie did the same as you. She grabbed your hand while trying to get you to look at her in the eyes. “Then why? Rafe’s sister, Sarah?” You shook your head. “Then what? You can talk to me, Y/n.” You looked at her and the feeling of missing her and the Pogues grew inside of you. It was true, you never turned down meeting the Pogues for anything, no matter how fucked up you felt, how angry you were, hanging out with the Pogues was the only thing that ever made you feel better. And it still was.
“You know what? I think meeting with the Pogues it’s going to do me good. Let’s go.”
You had to be honest, visiting the Chateau was making your heart skip a beat every time you thought about it. As closer as you got, all the memories of the night before came into your head making you regret your decision of visiting them in the first place. But as soon as you saw Pope letting out a big smile once he locked eyes with you, that feeling of warmth you felt everytime you were with them appeared on your body, loving every single second of it.
“Y/n! I missed you.” Pope said while embracing your body into a tight hug.
“Missed you too guys.” You locked eyes with John B and Sarah, who were already behind Pope.
“How are you?” Sarah asked, but the moment you were about to say something, the voice of someone complaining cut you off. You didn’t quite understand what they said, but you did knew who it came from. Pope turned around, making you able to see the blonde guy that seemed to be consuming all your thoughts since last night. He had bags under his eyes that made you realize he hadn’t been sleeping well. His eyes were glued to yours, they were staring at you so hardly to the point that you started to feel uncomfortable under them.
He rolled his eyes making you feel the normal annoying feeling you always had when he did that, making you cross your arms in front of your chest, to fight the need of flipping him off right on that moment.
Silence surrounded the room as JJ was walking towards you, once you noticed that he was getting closer your heart started beating faster and you hated that, you hated that he was making you feel that way. So much that you grabbed your arm with strength to control your feelings as much as you could. He locked eyes with you one last time before passing you, but not before hitting his shoulder with yours, making you move backwards and leaving a strong pain in it.
You rolled your eyes annoyed but your mouth didn’t opened, since he was already riding his bike to leave the Chateau behind.
“Don’t worry about it,” Pope said. “he’ll get over whatever has him troubled.” He said, but you doubted that was true.
Even if it took you a minute to forget what just happened, the moment that you sat down and started talking with the Pogues like you always did, everything bad that was hurting you was slowly disappearing. It was like a potion that took minutes to make effect on your body, but it did work. Laughs and more laughs were filling the room, the voices were so loudly that you felt they could be heard from a long distance, but you didn’t care, for the first time in a long time you were having a great time, and nothing was going to change that.
“Seriously! He said that!” Sarah yelled once she finished her story and pointed and John B, who opened his mouth offended.
“No I did not!”
“How can you know? You were asleep!” Laughs followed her words. Watching Sarah complain about John B was strangely funny.
“That doesn’t sound like me. I’ve never talked in my sleep. So I don’t take responsibility for that.” He said shaking his head and ending the conversation once he gave Sarah a kiss on the lips to enable her mouth from talking more.
“Talking about responsibility,” Kie said turning to Pope with a grin “and with that I’m turning the conversation to Pope, who is that girl I saw you talking yesterday?”
“What? Who?” Pope asked, clearly not expecting the question at all.
“You know who. That girl with the black hair.” Kie turned to you and gave you wink, letting you know something was going on.
“I don’t know who you’re talking about.” Pope said with his eyes glued to the ground, trying to avoid any eye contact and accidentally spilling something he didn’t want to.
“Oh, c’mon. I’m pretty sure you do because you were extremely close to her.”
“What?” You asked surprised. “Pope has a crush on someone?”
“No I don’t!”
“Oh, I think you do.” John B with a smile, enjoying the moment way too much.
Pope was about to say something on his defence, but someone walking through the door cut him off. “JJ!”
The moment that you turned to look at him your heart skipped a beat. He looked at the room quickly and the moment he locked eyes with you, he let out a annoying sigh. “You’re still here?” He asked disgusted, not trying to hide it at all.
“You have a problem with that?” You responded quickly, not giving him the win.
“Yes, you’re the problem.” He turned to you. “So unless you don’t leave I’ll always have the problem on me.”
“That’s on you, not me.” You got up from your sit to go get some water from the kitchen, hoping for JJ to leave the room, since you weren’t going to.
“Guys, I don’t think-” Pope was saying once he saw JJ’s face, but he cut him off.
“Why don’t you go back with Rafe, Y/n?” He asked firmly and with disgust, making you stop quickly in your spot and your heart going down to your stomach once you heard his name.
“JJ.” Kie said softly. But it was too late, he already said it, and didn’t had a plan to stop.
“But don’t get hurt next time.”
Silence followed his words, non of them knew what to respond to what he said, not even you. You felt like the air was getting thicker around you, making your chest hurt and your nose to miss some air, but the feeling that was taking over your body was anger. So, without thinking about your next actions, you turned around to face JJ. Kie was about to say something, but the palm of your hand was already hitting JJ’s cheek, making a loud noise in the process and leaving it with a reddish color and a strong pain in it.
“Asshole!” You yelled to his now in pain face. His eyes had surprise in them, but no one could say anything about it, not even him, since your body was already leaving the Chateau.
The sound of the waves was the next thing you heard. Your head was hurting so badly but you didn’t care, your board was already next to your body and your feet had the urge to ride the waves until they couldn’t anymore. Anger was controlling you in that moment, you knew that, you knew that surfing while there was a storm outside wasn’t a good idea, but you didn’t care. All you wanted to do was feel the water of the ocean hitting your body while you were on top of your board, killing the wave and having that loved feeling in your heart as usual.
Your eyes were so blurry because of the water of the rain in them that you could barely see. Your eyelashes were so thick now that you could see them more clearly in your eyes, the rain hitting your body with so much strength was making you feel a little bit of pain, but as soon as you sat down on your board, everything that was bothering you went away.
The water under your board was getting difficult to control, your body was moving quickly along with the waves, but this wasn’t your first time, you got this.
“Yeah, I got this. I fucking got this.” You said to yourself loudly, but with the sound of the water and the rain, your voice was quickly brushed off.
You saw your first wave and a little smile escaped your lips. The next thing happened faster than you could think of your next action, but it didn’t matter, your body already knew what it had to do.
As soon as your feet felt the wave under them your heart dropped to your stomach, the wave was so strong that it took you a moment to adjust everything, but seconds later it wasn’t the wave riding you, it was you riding the fuck out of that wave. You heard the thunderstorm in the sky and your brain was yelling you to get out of there, but your body wasn’t listening, the enjoyment of the wave was way too much for you to ignore it. Your body didn’t want to leave, and there was nothing that could change that. Following the wave with your board, you saw it ending and getting closer to the shore, so you dropped your body downwards, flexing your knees to finish the wave with more speed and finally sitting down once you felt it was over. But you didn’t had much time to rest, since another wave was coming your way.
But this one was different. Ignoring the strong thunderstorm that was happening more often than before, you paddled close to the wave hitting the water around you with more strength since the rain was making the ocean more thicker around you. It was moving so quickly that before you could cover yourself, the wave hit your body, making you fall from your board and losing yourself in the water.
You tried to hard to swam to the surface but your arms couldn’t seem to control the water around you and take your body upwards. You felt how your chest was asking for air but nothing that you did was moving your body, it was just the ocean moving you along with it. The sound of the rain became a distant sound since the sound of your heart beating faster became all you could hear. You felt your eyes getting blurrier while your arms were still trying to take you to the surface. You looked for your board but it was nowhere to be seen, so moving your legs as fast as you could finally managed to get your head out of the water to get some air, but that lasted no more than seconds, since the water was already pushing you downwards.
For the first time in your life, you didn’t know what to do in the water. For as long as you could remember your body was always looking for solutions when it came to surfing or swimming, you were a natural at it. But this time, your body was finally giving up, letting your arms down since they hurted like they never did before. You tried to move your legs but they weren’t answering, making you fall more deep into the water and your eyes to slightly close.
This was it. Your heart stopped beating even if your body didn’t stop moving, since it was still being moved around by the water. You closed your eyes once you felt your chest hurting, asking desperately for air. Even if you were underwater, you felt a tear coming out of your eyes, you were giving up, and there’s nothing you could do about it since it looked like it wasn’t up to you to decide.The moment that you felt no noise around you, your mind went all black, expect for one thing being right there in front of you. But it wasn’t a thing, it was a him. But before you could figure out who he was, you felt some hands grabbing your waist, pulling away from where you were and taking your body up to the surface.
“Are you stupid?! Why would you do that?!” That was the first thing you heard once your body recovered itself and let go of the water that was inside of it. “How can you be so stupid? You almost drowned!”
You coughed and once you were over, you looked up without moving your body from the sand. “Yeah no shit Sherlock!” You yelled but instantly regret it since a strong pain came into your chest.
“Good way to treat the person that just saved your life!”
“Fuck off!” You said gaining the feeling of the rain hitting your body once again. “Am I supposed to be super thankful now?! After you treated me like shit?!” You got up from the sand and gave JJ a good look at him. He had his hair all over her face and had sand all over his knees and feet, his hands were almost red from the cold and his chest was moving quickly because of the heavy breathing coming out of his mouth.
“And you’re a fucking angel aren’t you? You’re so fucking perfect!”
“Clearly I am not! But you can’t fucking see that!”
“You’re such a fucking brat!” He yelled so loudly that not even the thunderstorm could cover his voice.
“Oh here we go again with the brat comeback. Call me when your little brain can think of something else!”
“It’s the truth! You and you’re fucking perfect life!”
“Fuck off!” With the intention to leave the beach behind, you pushed JJ but he barely moved, and in the process he grabbed your arms to prevent you pushing him again. You tried to let go of his grip but he made sure you couldn’t by grabbing your waist and pulling you closer, enabling your body from moving away.
The way that you locked eyes with each other was something that made your body shiver. Even if you had so much anger in your body right now, his hands around your body somehow calmed your heart from jumping out of your chest, and instead, butterflies were flying all over your stomach now. You noticed how his eyes were slowly going from your eyes to your lips, making you feel weak under them. You felt one of his hands leaving your waist to grab your cheek. Shook at his action, you stayed still like your brain had shut down and he was controlling you, leaving you under the spell of his touch.
“Why did you get back with him?” He asked loudly so you could hear him under the rain, still looking at your eyes. “After what he did to you...”
The pain in them made you remember the night before, the hurt and the disappointment... they stabbed your chest once again but this time, it was something so strongly that you felt the air not wanting to come inside your body.
“Do you really care?” You asked more softly, feeling your throat hurt since the tears were fighting to come out.
“Maybe I’m not the only one who’s blind.” He said making your heart drop to your stomach. His eyes were glued to yours not moving for even one second, the closeness of your bodies while you were under his eyes made you remember the figure you saw moments ago. It wasn’t a nobody.
“I hate you.” Your voice said with so much pain. So much that it hurted you to say it, and you didn’t know why. You waited for him to say the same thing, but instead, he did a little nod and looked down once he let go of your waist.
“I know.” He said so softly that it made you more anger than you felt before. He said horrible things to you and then treated you the opposite way, expecting for you to understand what the hell was going on. But you didn’t. So, without saying another word, you walked away with your heart stabbed and tears going down your cheeks.
As soon as your head hit your bed all the tears that wanted to come out since this morning finally did. The pain in your chest became even more bigger and the air had difficulty entering your body while your room was surrounded by silence. You didn’t know why you were crying, maybe the fact that you still had the feeling of the water hitting your body and your chest asking for air, your dad, or even JJ... there was that question that had a million of answers, or even not answer at all.
When you calmed down you sat down ready to wash all the tears away from your cheeks. After checking to see if anyone was between your room and the bathroom, you stepped out of your room once you noticed the corridor was as empty as the whole house itself. You opened the bathroom door to see a message for you in the mirror, ready for you to read it.
“Don’t forget about the party! Get a nice dress, some make up, and fix your hair like a true lady. We leave at 6 pm without any excuses. Love you, dad.”
You let out a tiny sigh once you read the note your dad left. You ripped the paper out of your mirror and then continued to wash your face, already wishing all of that was over even if it didn’t started yet.
You closed the door of the bathroom to walk with lazy steps to your room while your mind, with no enthusiasm at all, was looking for a dress to wear. You walked to your room without turning the light on since your eyes still hurted a little bit from having them open under the water. But you knew your room like the palm of your hand so the little light that was coming from the outside was enough for you. With quick steps, you started to head towards your closet, but when a strong pain appeared in your foot you stopped immediately.
“Fuck!” You said lifting your foot up to grab it and look at the thing that hurted your foot. A tiny rock was laying there next to your bed, with furrowed eyebrows and confused thoughts you headed to turn the light on and see if there was any other rocks in your room. Nothing. Your eyes went over your floor at least two times to check, but there was only that rock in the floor. With slow steps you walked closer to it and grabbed it with your hand, even if it was stupid, like you expected to understand how it got there if you grabbed it, you did it anyways. And of course, nothing happened after that. Until, you saw how another rock entered your room through the window.
“What the fuck?” You asked getting closer to your window. The sound of the rain got even more louder as closer and you got. A sudden wave of fear appeared into your body, but as soon as you saw the body that was standing down your window, the fear that you were feeling turned into butterflies in your stomach. “What are you doing here?” You asked loudly enough so he could hear you on top of the rain.
“Are you going to let me it or let me get all wet?” He said, while the water was going down his body.
“It’s very tempting.”
“Alright, I’ll just scream what I have to say and alert your dad, getting you into trouble for bringing a boy that’s not your boyfriend home.”
You were about to say that he wasn’t home, but as soon as you opened mouth you saw his car parked in the driveway.
You rolled your eyes while letting out a sigh. Perfect timing, dad. “You’re a pain in the ass.” You said more to herself but you knew JJ heard you. You nodded letting him know it was alright for him to get into your room and you started to hear him climbing to your window, until what you heard came into your eyes. When JJ crossed the window you got the chance to see him more clearly now, taking your eyes immediately to his cheek. “Glad your cheek has gone back to almost normal by now.”
“I hate to admit it but” JJ touched his cheek and let out a tiny laugh “you’re strong.” A confused feeling took over you since he didn’t respond to you hitting him, instead, he complimented you. Something that didn’t happen often... or ever.
“What is it that you wanted to say?” You said, brushing your thoughts away.
“Sorry.” He said firmly, and then waited for your unsure response.
“For what?”
“Saying what I said at the Chateau today.” Even if he was answering quickly, you noticed that he had trouble saying those words.
You let out a tiny laugh and then shook your head. “Since when did we started to apologise to the other?” You asked expecting for JJ to follow your joke but instead, he closed his eyes with strength and grabbed his face with frustration.
“Oh my god! Why can’t you just accept the apology?”
“Why should I?”
“It’s human decency to accept someone’s apology.” He opened his eyes to locked them with yours. You were getting used to seeing the pain and disappointment in them.
“Not really. If I don’t want to, I won’t.”
“And you tell me I’m the pain in the ass? You’re such a brat.”
“I thought you came here to apologise not insult me.”
“Gosh!” He yelled making the thunderstorm outside tiny. “I can’t stand you!” You felt the tension in the room getting heavier every second. Used to fighting, your words came into your mouth before your brain could think of something.
“Then why are you here?!”
“Because I wanted to fucking see you!”
Silence followed his words. You stayed still in your spot while processing the moment. His eyes were now closed once he looked down, realising what his mouth just said.
“What?” You asked softly, even if you knew exactly what he said. Your mind was repeating it over and over again.
“I wanted-” he said with his eyes still closed but then stopped. He let out a long sigh and then opened them to gain courage and locked eyes with you. Once he did, the air entering your body cut off for one second. “I wanted to see you. I don’t know why, I don’t know what the fuck is going on but somehow I can’t stop fucking thinking about you. Somehow there’s a part of my brain that hates you and the other-” he spited out but then stopped, making you more impatient to hear his next words.
“The other what?” You asked, wanting to hear the answer but afraid of it at the same time.
“The other wants to kiss you right now.” Your brain was processing too slowly everything that was going on. It was yelling to you to say something but your mouth wasn’t responding. Everything that had happened over the past days was flying on your head like an old movies. You were finally understanding some of it, but your head was still so confused you couldn’t let out a word.
JJ noticed your silence and because of that, he closed his eyes and looked down, regretting his words. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” Without giving you time to answer, he turned around to the window with the intention to leave your room behind.
“JJ-”
“Forget I said anything.” He said once his leg was already hanging from your window without giving you any eye contact. Before you could react and say something, he was already out your room leaving with a head full of thought and a stomach full of butterflies.
As soon as your head came back to your room from wherever it was, you heard your dad entering your room and start loudly asking why weren’t you change. You moved your body to your closet to grab a random dress you had in it and throw it into your bed once your dad walked out of your room. Even if he said so many words, you didn’t even heard one. All you could think about was JJ and what he just said. He wanted to kiss you? Since when did he felt like that? Is that why he defended you the other day? So many questions were going through your mind, but once one single question appeared in your mind, that was the only one that started to consume your brain: Do you feel the same as him?
You remembered the moment you saw him once you were under water asking for air, or how you felt every time he walked into the room, butterflies flying around your stomach, or your heart skipping a beat or beating faster. Your enjoyment when he was touching you didn’t passed unnoticed between your thoughts, but before you could think more into it, you were already at the party with your dad having the biggest fake smile in your face.
The party was filled with men talking about business, wine, and another stuff you didn’t cared at all. It seemed like your dad completely forgot about you, since he didn’t even say a word to you since the moment you two walked through the door of that huge mansion. On the inside you were thankful for that, faking a personality to 50 year old men wasn’t something that you wanted to do, not even if it was the thing that was keeping you alive. The drink in your hand was already getting hotter and the gas was going away, but since your mouth wasn’t planning on drinking it you just kept holding it to seem like you were doing something. Your eyes were going through the room to save yourself from the boredom you were feeling, but the moment you felt an arm going around your shoulders your eyes turned to the person now standing next to you.
“Here’s my girl.” He said with his arrogant tone that made you feel disgusted on the inside.
“Rafe.” You said erasing your fake smile from your face.
“Why so serious sweetheart?” He said going down to your lips and then your eyes, after giving a sip to his drink without breaking the eye contact.
You turned your head to the side and without skipping a beat, the words left your lips with a firm tone: “Maybe because you’re here.”
His smile went away from his face and then looked around hoping no one heard that. “Wow, wow, what’s that?” He asked bringing the arrogant smile back to his face. “What did you say? Maybe we should get some fresh air.” He tried to walk you outside but with strength, you didn’t move from your spot.
“Why? So you can hurt me again?” The stare that you were giving him was so strongly that even you felt it. His face went from arrogance from shook and anger, but you without wanting to hear any of Rafe’s words, you left his grip and walked away hoping for him to not follow you. And for your luck, someone called his name and that made him gain the personality of a business man back and let you go, but not before he tried to burn you with his eyes.
As soon as your eyes saw the door that leaded you to the backyard, your feet were already walking towards it, maybe fresh air was going to calm you down and prepare you for the rest of the night. You left the drink on a table once you were outside to walk more deep into the backyard since it looked like it was way more bigger than your own house. So, leaving the party behind, you started to walk towards the big bushes hoping to find something interesting to look at.
A slow wind started to blow around your face as you were getting closer to the end of it, or at least it seemed that it was the end for you. It can’t last forever, but with this kind of people, you never know.
Silence surrounded you, not even the piano from the party could be heard anymore. You were thankful for that, even if you liked the sound of the instrument, you boredom was making you hate it. Looking for something to do, your eyes noticed some little pink flowers growing in one of the bushes, so without waiting around, you got closer to it and gently grabbed one. Your fingers immediately felt the softness of them, it looked so fragile that you made sure to not touch it too much. After letting it go, you took your nose to it to smell it, but before your nose could get to it, a strange noise made you turned around.
“Hello?” You asked and then every horror movie that you ever watched came into your head. Even if your heart started to beat a little bit faster you walked closer to where you heard the noise, expecting to see some type of animal, but when your eyes saw that blonde hair a wave of relief came into your chest. “JJ?” You asked furrowing your eyebrows confused. You looked around hoping nobody saw him. “How did you get in?”
“The have really bad security.” He said while slowly walking towards you. As he was getting closer the poor light of the backyard hit him better. He had his hands inside his pockets and was still wearing the same clothes as the last time you saw him. “Surprises me, you would think people with a house like this would have a decent security system.”
He was talking like nothing had happened hours ago. Like he didn’t confess he wanted to kiss you and then walked away, leaving you behind for your thoughts to eat you alive.
“What are you doing?” You asked while watching him get closer to you without stopping.
“I don’t know.” He said softly. “Lately, I have no fucking clue what I’ve been doing.” You knew that he was talking about his last words to you and the way he was acting. You wanted to responde to that but didn’t know what. Because deep down, you knew that you felt the same way as him. “Is the party going well?”
You sighed looking back at the house. “It sucks.”
JJ let out a tiny laugh making you turn to him and for your heart to skip a beat once it noticed his eyes were looking at yours. “Maybe we should do a party of our own.”
“A Kegger?” You nodded with a smile. “That would be nice.”
Laughs followed your words and that made you enjoy the moment you were having with him, not thinking about was happened and forgetting that it was you and JJ having that conversation. No fight was involved. “Wow, first time without fighting after a long time.” He said like he just read your thoughts.
“Don’t jinxed it.”
He let out a tiny laugh. “I always fuck up everything.”
“I know.” You said jokingly. “That is something that we have in common.”
“Yeah... that’s it.” Once he said those words you noticed his eyes going down to your lips making the butterflies go wild inside your stomach. He was so close that you could even see the details in his face with the little light of the moon and the backyard. His blue eyes were so concentrated in you that you started to feel like he was penetrating you with them, like he wanted to be more closer but his body wasn’t letting them get to where they wanted to be... As that thought came into your head, the realisation of what was happening came into your body and your feet took a step backwards while your head turned to where the party was still happening.
“Maybe you should leave before someone sees you.” You said softly, turning back to see JJ and his eyes on yours.
“Maybe.” He said in the same tone as you did. But he wasn’t moving, instead he stayed glued in his spot, getting to the courage ready to do whatever he wanted to do. “Is Kie here?” He asked.
“She told she had to come but I haven’t seen her yet. Why?”
He bit the corner of his lower lip once you asked that question. You noticed that he took a tiny breath, before doing a quick look to your lips. “Because I just want this to be kept between us.”
“What?” You asked quickly but it was too late, his feet were fast just like his hands because his body was glued to yours and the palm of his hands were grabbing your cheeks. He waited for your response but it didn’t took long, since your lips were already moving along side his. His touch was warm, it felt just like when the sun hits your skin and you feel it entering your body and leaving tiny burn sensations in it. But it wasn’t an annoying feeling, the opposite, you didn’t want it to end. You felt the butterflies in your stomach going into a rave with the single touch of his hand in your waist to pull you closer to him, even if there wasn’t any space left between you two. But that didn’t matter, you both wanted to be as close as possible and that was said in the kiss. The kiss that felt it lasted hours for how much you two felt, but in reality it only lasted seconds before you and JJ pulled away asking for air.
He immediately united his forehead with yours while your eyes were still closed. As much as you wanted to process what just happened, your brain was enjoying the moment so strongly that you just let it happen. A little smile escaped your lips once you felt his thumb caressing your cheek. You opened your eyes to see him staring at you, like he never did before.
He was about to say something but then, a voice talked behind you two.
“Fucking Pogue.” Rafe said with anger once you turned to him. You felt your stomach turn as he started to walk towards the bushes, where you were with JJ.
“Should we run?” He asked, grabbing your hand.
“Are you seriously asking me if we should escape a really angry Rafe?” You asked and JJ let out a funny smile that lead you to let out a laugh. “Fucking go!”
As soon as you said those words, you felt JJ taking your hand away and running towards a part of the house you didn’t notice before. You asked yourself what this place was but then came up with the idea that maybe this was where he got in. You heard Rafe’s footsteps following you closely but the rush was making you ignore it while laughs were coming out of your mouth. You finally felt alive, like you never did before.
You saw a white wall that you quickly deduced you had to climb to get out, and you were right. JJ, with no help at all, climb the wall and sat down at the end of it to reached for you hand.
“Stop!” You heard Rafe yell and you let out a laugh while grabbing JJ’s hand.
And just like that, you were out of the house, leaving the lame party and Rafe behind with JJ still grabbing your hand.
“That was... something.” You said with your heavy breathing once you made sure no one was around and you stopped running.
“Oh, please, you had fun running away.” He said looking at you as he was trying to take his breathing back to normal.
You shrugged your shoulders. “Maybe I did.”
“It’s not going to hurt you if you say I’m right at least once.”
“Oh, it’s going to kill me. I know it. I can feel it.” You touched your chest and JJ let out tiny laugh while shaking his head. You looked at him as his blue eyes were staring at you, and for the first time, you didn’t see any pain and disappointment in them. “This is weird.” You said once your breathing was now normal.
“Good weird of bad weird?” He asked.
“It’s yet to be determined.” You said those words and immediately noticed how a little smile escaped his lips.
“Can I do something to make it more good weird?” He asked softly getting closer to your body and grabbing your waist to pull you closer. This time, you didn’t feel uncomfortable under his eyes, instead, the feeling of warmth they were giving you made you want that feeling to last forever.
With his other hand, he grabbed your cheek and united his forehead with yours, making you feel his breathing against your skin.
“I still hate you.” You said, as his lips were getting closer.
He let out a smile and then nodded impatiently waiting for your lips. Hoping he would end the space between you two you stared at his lips, but instead of united them, they said softly: “Same.”
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Speak Easy Part 10
Dabi x Reader, Bakugo x Reader
Words : 7142
Masterlist
Reader has a siren quirk and has spent the past several years of her life as a captive being experimented on by “heroes” Now that she’s out she needs protection and safe place to heal. Who will be the one to put her pieces back together?
Words with ‘this’ is dialogue written in her journal rather than said out loud and and words with ~this~ is dialogue said in sign language rather than out loud.
*********************************************************************
“Hold her down! Fuck! How is she still this strong? How much did you give her?”
Your vision was black, and you couldn’t tell if that was because you were blindfolded or just too drugged up to open your eyes. You could hear shuffling as two? No three people moved around you. One was pinning your arms down while another played with the collar that was digging into your neck.
“Listen man, I don’t think we’re supposed to be in here. If they find out we played with their new toy they’ll be pissed!”
There was a new set of hands gently pushing your flimsy medical gown up, “You heard what they were saying right? They said she’s the best sex a man will ever have in their life. It’s like her quirk or something.” You wanted to cry out, but your tongue felt like lead in your mouth. Were you even able to speak? Were you gagged? You couldn’t even tell. “What they don’t know won’t hurt them.” The hand firmly pressed into your hip. “Now hold her down, and make sure she stays quiet.”
You woke with a rush. Your breath beyond labored as you tried to run from the memories that refused to stay hidden for long. A new set of hands circled around your waist. These hands were different though. These hands were rough and callused. These hands were patient. These hands were reassuring.
“You want to talk about it?”
You shook your head before turning into him and burying your face into his chest. “Just another bad memory.”
His fingers trailed through your hair as he repeatedly kissed the top of your head. “Sometimes I wish I could just hop into your head, like you did mine the other night. Then I could see their faces. And I never forget a face…”
You heard the unsaid threat in his words. He wanted to know your demons so he could hunt them down. He was like Bakugo in that way. They both needed to do something…anything to make them feel like they were helping. The only difference is at the end of the day Bakugo’s victims end up in prison and Dabi’s end up six feet under.
The pounding in your head only seemed to increase. The drums of regret beating behind your eyeballs. “God.. why did we drink so much yesterday?” You groaned and curled further into Dabi’s side.
His fingers rubbed at your temples. “I seem to remember it being your idea. And who am I to deny the drinking queen.”
You groaned as you remembered your antics. “I know you’re not exactly known for being a good influence… but you could have tried a little harder to at least get me to drink some water.”
Dabi vibrated with soft chuckles. “Consider your hangover penance for making me play that ridiculous game. Now get off of me and go take a shower. You smell like a bar.”
With a pouting look you sighed, “But I’m still sad.”
Dabi gave your ass a hard slap. “There is no rule that says you can’t be sad and in the shower. Get your ass in there and clean yourself up. You’ll feel better after your clean and fed. I promise.”
With a chorus of dramatic groans and muffled curses you pulled yourself off of him and slowly made your way to his bathroom. You stopped right before you crossed the threshold and turned to give him your poutiest look, “Are you really going to make me do it alone.”
A pillow flew through the air faster than you thought possible and hit you in the face. “You are more than capable of cleaning yourself. I have other things I need to take care of.”
You stuck your bottom lip out, “Just because I can doesn’t mean that I want to.”
Like a man possessed, Dabi slowly got out of bed. He moved so slow, as if he was a predator stalking his prey. You instinctively held your breath in anticipation as he inched closer and closer. His eyes like a dim fire, but focused on you all the same. He invaded your personal space, slamming his hand on the door behind you beside your head. He leaned down until his nose brushed yours and his lips hovered over yours.
You closed your eyes as he leaned closer but right before your lips connected, “I don’t remember asking what you wanted. You need to take a shower, and I need to handle some business. If you’re still this desperate later then I’ll be more than happy to fuck you.” He gripped your chin and bumped your nose with his. “It’s not that I don’t want to. But I don’t want you to fall into a habit of letting me have my way with you every time you have a bad memory. It’s not fair to either of us.” You felt a single tear streak down your cheek as you nodded. “If it’s just a distraction fine, but you need to learn how to confront and deal with this shit on your own. It’ll just be harder later if you don’t. Believe me.”
A few beats of silence passed before he reluctantly backed away from you. His fingers lingering before letting go of you completely. It wasn’t until he was exiting his room you had the nerve to speak up. “You’re not just a distraction.”
There was no telling if he actually heard you or not. If he did, he didn’t react or respond. Your admission caught you surprise, and you almost hoped he hadn’t. You thought about this weird new attachment you were feeling to Dabi lately while you took your shower. You wouldn’t go as far as to call this foreign new feeling love or anything crazy like that. But you were growing quite fond of his presence. You felt comfort in his warmth, and you appreciated the way his hands always knew just wear to touch to ease your anxiety. Sure, he was a certified asshole, but at least he kept you strong. He made sure you took care of yourself. He didn’t take your shit or your excuses. He got you walking, talking, and opening up within weeks.
You went through your routine slowly, taking your time under the hot water. You’d rather not think about the memory that surfaced last night. But Dabi was right. You needed to take time to work things out yourself. His comfort was more of a band aid, a temporary fix. You needed to at least try to heal on your own.
You had no idea when it happened. It seemed like it was pretty early in your captivity. Back when you still had a little fight in you. You didn’t actually remember what happened after that but you can only assume the worst. Your skin crawled at the thought. You hugged yourself as you let the water hit your back. You closed your eyes as you let your heart beat slowly even out. You refused to let this define you. You were more than your trauma. You thought about Dabi again. He had his own scars. Both literally and figuratively. He had to look in the mirror every day and see the evidence of his trauma every day. If he could do that then you could do this.
One look into the mirror showed that your hair was absurdly long. You would need to cut it soon. But for now, you could just braid it. You giggled as you finished, it was like you had a secret weapon. It gave you a childish idea.
Skipping out of the room you made your way to the kitchen where Dabi was currently on the phone. If hero training taught you anything, it was stealth.
Silent as a mouse you tiptoed up to his turned back.
“We’ll be fine. You’re more than welcome to come if you’re that worried, but I promise it’s not a big deal.” You paused right before you pounced on him, curiosity getting the best of you. “I’ll send you the location, as well as updates. Will that make you feel better?” You could hear a rough voice on the other end and you instinctively knew it was Katsuki. “She’s fine, calm down already. She’s behind me right now thinking she’s sneaky would you like to talk to her?” You leapt at him swinging your braid like a whip and hitting him in the chest.
You froze as Dabi’s gaze flipped to you in seconds. “You want to talk to him?”
You silently nodded as you excepted the phone from him. “Hi…”
A relieved sigh, “I was worried you’d still be mad at me.”
You suddenly wished he was physically here so you could reassure him. “It was silly for me to react that way. It’s obviously not your fault. It… it just sucks.”
“I know…”
So many words hovered on the tip of your tongue, but you just couldn’t make yourself say them. “I feel like we need to talk, but I don’t want it to be over the phone.”
Katsuki gave a nervous chuckle, “Well I guess you’re in luck.” The doorbell rang out and you almost dropped Dabi’s phone.
Dabi took his phone back from you before stomping off to open the front door. “I really didn’t think you’d take me seriously when I said you could come.”
Without breaking eye contact with you Katsuki entered the house, “Well you did offer, and I did come. So, quite bitching and deal with it.” He noticed your nervous posture and he softened, which was something you didn’t think he was capable of. “You want to hash it out here, or would you like to talk privately?”
You nodded your head towards the back door, “It’s a nice day. We can sit on the patio.”
Dabi was secretly grateful. You would get the chance to have an honest conversation with Bakugo while also staying where he could see you.
Katsuki followed you out to the garden. He notices how you refused to look at the pool but he didn’t comment on it. “So… are we gonna talk about it?”
You collapsed into your chair and sighed. “I think we need to.” You looked up and your eyes locked with his vermillion ones. “Look, I’m sorry for reacting the way I did. I just… It’s just not fair.” You huffed as you averted your eyes. “That sounds so fucking childish but it’s how I feel. You, Izuku, Shoto, you all got to achieve your dreams. You’re heroes. But the people who did this, who are still doing this to me… they’re technically heroes too.”
His hands squeezed yours, but he made no attempt to cut off your little rant. “They would never do this to you. No one would even believe them if they tried. The public love you guys and you’re damn good at your jobs… and yet there’s nothing you can do to help me…” You could feel his gaze on you and your cheeks reddened. “I just feel helpless and stupid. Stupid for believing so much in the system. Stupid for falling for all their little tricks. Stupid for not seeing the bigger picture. And at the end of the day I can’t even fight it because I did those things… well not all of it, but a good majority. All I can do is lay low and pray no one ever finds me. I’m fucking helpless.”
He grunted and his grip on your hand tightened. “It kills me. You say I’m a hero and I can’t even save you.” You finally looked at him again and all you saw in his eyes now was raw anger. “I’ve never been so confused… so helpless in my life. I don’t know who to trust. I don’t know who’s on what side. Was my whole life a lie? Do real heroes even truly exist? Or are we all just pawns in some fucking bigger game?” His voice began to break under his emotion. “I love you y/n. I’m in love with you. I have been for a very long time. Maybe even since we were kids. And I can’t sleep at night because out of everyone in the world you were the one I couldn’t save. I blame myself every day. I tell myself if I had just fucking manned up and told you how I felt sooner then maybe we would have had a chance… and maybe I would have noticed when shit started going sideways.”
There was a flash of vulnerability in his eyes, but it was quickly replaced by anger once more. “Now you’re with him and it feels like I’ve completely lost you. Not that I’m complaining. If he’s what you need to heal then… whatever, I’ll just have to get over it. But I need you to know that I’ll always be there for you. No matter what. I don’t care who you’re with, who’s after you, I don’t care! You are and will always be my top priority.” You rubbed reassuring circles into his hand with your thumb. “You say it’s not fair and I get it. It’s not. It’s disgusting. You don’t deserve any of this. For the first time in my life it has me questioning what side I’m on.”
Your entire lives the only things Katsuki seemed to care about was becoming the number one hero and beating Izuku. So, to hear him say that he’s now questioning that broke your heart. “Katsuki, please don’t say that. Even if the hero system is fucked up. That’s doesn’t mean all heroes are too. You’re in it for the right reasons. I have no doubt that if all the hero agencies crumble today, tomorrow you’d be right back on those streets defending the people. You don’t need an official rank to be the number one.”
He let out a huge sigh and you could see the tension leave his shoulders. It was like a huge weight had lifted off of him. He gave you one of his trademark smirks, although it was a little softer than usual. “You always seem to know what to say when I’m falling apart.”
You ran a hand through his spiky blonde hair, “I’d like to think I am an expert Katsuki bomb defuser at this point.” He rolled his eyes, but you could see the slight pink blush dusting his cheeks. “I’ve spent most of my life finding ways to calm you down before you explode, and honestly I wouldn’t trade that time for anything.”
“Oh yeah? Even though half the time it ended in scrapped knees and pulled pigtails?”
“Sometimes it ended in shared ice cream and hand holding.” You giggled, “You used to hold my hand all the damn time when we were little. Dragging me from one place to the next, always so impatient.” You gave him a puzzled look, “But then one day you stopped out of nowhere and told me it was gross.”
“Tsk. You have my shitty mother to thank for that. When my quirk started developing, she told me to stop holding your hand because I might blow you up.” He gave you sly smile, “Technically she was right, but it still scared the shit out of me.”
You both talked and giggled for what felt like hours. The weight of the pervious day slowly floating away. You probably would have stayed that way for much longer if his phone hadn’t gone off interrupting the two of you.
He glared at his screen before grunting. “I’ve been here too long. I need to get going.” He stood from his comfortable spot next to you and stretched. He gave you a long look over from you head to your toes and back. “I promise I’ll try to not obsess over what you and staples do when I’m not around, if you promise to not do anything stupid.”
“You know I can’t promise that. Weren’t you the one who used to say stupid was my middle name?” He gave you an unamused look and crossed his arms over his chest in frustration. You cut him off before he could start on a lecture. “I promise to try to behave and stay out of trouble. There feel better?”
A drawn our sigh left his lips. If his expression was any indicator, your promise did absolutely nothing for his nerves. “I guess it’ll have to be good enough.” He leaned over and kissed the top of your head, “I’ll be back to check on you in a few days, alright?”
You nodded as he reluctantly made his way back towards the house. You watched him leave but decided to stay outside a little longer. It really was nice outside, and you wanted some more time to yourself before Dabi grilled you about your conversation with Katsuki.
---
Bakugo stomped back into the house and wasn’t surprised when he was quickly apprehended by the very man that plagued his thoughts. “Oi, whatever it is you want to say, say it quick. I got to get out of here before they notice I left.”
“I know the two of you have a lot of history… So…” He looked uncomfortable for a brief second. “She just looks happy when you visit… so uh… thanks.”
Bakugo had to blink back his surprise. He had been preparing himself for a fight. “Yeah well… you obviously aren’t doing a bad job either… she seems comfortable around you.”
The two men spent the next few moments awkwardly staring at each other before Bakugo cleared his throat. “Listen. I think it’s obvious I have feeling for her. She knows that now. But at the end of the day I just want her to be happy. Maybe if things had gone differently, we would have ended up together, and maybe one day we still will. But she’s gone through enough shit recently, and if… if you’re what she needs right now… Then I wont get in the way.”
Now it was Dabi’s turn to be surprised. Everything he knew about the great Dynamight was his unwavering need to be the best, to win, to conquer all opponents. So to him conceding really showed not only how much he had matured in recent years but also how serious he took his relationship with you.
“I’ll always be there for her. Like you said she likes it when I come to visit, so I’ll keep coming around.”
To this Dabi groaned, “Coming to visit is one thing, but hanging all over her and kissing her in front of me is another. Keep your sweaty hands to yourself.”
Bakugo barked out a laugh, “I kissed the top of her head calm down. Don’t tell me you’re not up for a little competition?” When Dabi’s only answer was to only narrow his eyes Bakugo smiled. “Just because I’m not going to throw a fit about the two of you… doing whatever it is you’re doing… doesn’t mean I’ve completely given up. If you ever mess up, and let’s be honest you probably will… I’m going to be there for her.”
“I’m actually counting on it.”
Bakugo gave him one last glance before nodding and making his way towards the exit.
--
Dabi joined you outside as the soft breeze kissed his always too warm skin. You kept your eyes closed as you heard his heavy feet approaching. “If you’re grumpy about Katsuki I don’t want to hear about it.”
His large form blocked the sun as he hovered over you. “What would I have to be grumpy about? He’s not the one you were begging to fuck you in the shower this morning.” His rough hands ran over your bare legs. “Put some real clothes on we have some errands to run.”
Your eyes snapped open. “Errands? Like we’re leaving the house? I’m going outside?”
“Well technically you go outside all the time, but yes, you will be leaving the property today. Stretch your legs, get some fresh air and all that good stuff. I don’t know if you noticed but we are really low on groceries and there’s only enough ice cream left for one of us and I don’t like you enough to share… So go change.”
You practically sprinted back to your room. You threw on the one dress you had that had come in one of your care packages from Izuku and Shoto. The only other clothes you had were either T-shirts, pajamas, or belonged to Dabi.
You knew you had a pair of shoes somewhere, but you couldn’t remember where you put them. You hadn’t exactly needed them until now. The longer you looked the more your nerves ate at you.
Were you ready to leave? You were safe here. Did you want to leave your little bubble?
You knew Dabi wouldn’t let anything happen to you, but it was still terrifying.
A soft knock broke you from your thoughts. “What’s taking so long?”
“Sorry, can’t find my shoes.”
To this he nodded, “Oh they’re in the garage.”
“How did they get there?”
He shrugged, “You threw them at me once, so I hid them.”
With a dramatic roll of your eyes you made your way over to him. “What you scared or something?”
His hands gripped your waist and pulled you to him, “Oh a shoe? No. Of you throwing said shoe at me? Of course. I would be stupid not to be afraid of you.”
You smiled proudly, “Damn right. And don’t you forget it.”
He gave your hips a squeeze, “I could get used to seeing you in a dress.” His hand snaked around to you lower back finding your long braid and grinned evilly as he grabbed it and wrapped it around his wrist effectively pulling you head back and baring your neck to him. “Oh and this braid is amazing.” His lips brushed over your bare shoulder, then your neck, your cheek, before finally giving you a quick peck on your lips.
You reached up on your tippy toes to ghost your lips over his. “Remember when I wanted to have sex this morning and your promised if I was still desperate later, you’d fuck me?” A fire lit in his eyes as he silently nodded. “You leaned even closer but still kept your lips from fully connecting with his. “Karma’s a bitch.”
“UGH!” His hands left you as he did what you could only assume was his version of pouting. “You fucking brat…Let’s go. The sooner we go, the sooner we can come back and lock ourselves in our room.”
Our room? It was the first time he had said that. You weren’t sure which room he was referring to, but either way, you kind of liked the way it sounded.
You held your hand out to him, “Oh come on now. Don’t be like that. You can hold my hand.”
He glared at you then your hand and then back to you. “No thanks. They probably are still covered in nitroglycerin from your little friend and I’d hate to accidentally look control of my quirk and blow us up.”
You balled up the hand you had offered to him and punched his shoulder, “Who’s the brat now?”
He led you to the garage in silence, noticing the way your shoulders tensed the closer you got. Right before you reached the door, he stopped you. “I know this is probably just as scary as it is exciting so just need you to remember a couple things, okay? One.” He placed his hands on your shoulders and looked you straight in the eye. “I’m not going to let anything bad happen to you. I think we both know I’m not above cremating someone’s fingers off if they even so much as look at you the wrong way. Two. You are way stronger than you feel right now. You may have been through hell, but you came out stronger than you went in.”
His eyes suddenly got very serious. “And most importantly three. Despite number one and two, I need you to be careful and stay close to me. I can’t help you if I can’t get to you, and just because you can take care of yourself doesn’t mean you should have to. It’s just a quick run to a grocery store and back. No reason to get into any trouble.”
You nodded enthusiastically, your excitement starting to overpower your nerves. He looked you up and down and smirked. His fingers came up to pinch your nipple through your dress which had you immediately moaning and pressing closer to him. “I’ll tell you what…one thing we will not being buying today is a bra.” Your teeth pressed into your bottom lip as you held back a whine of pleasure. He gave your nipple one last tug before letting go and backing away. “I love the easy access.”
You took a steadying breath before following him into the garage. You opened the door to the familiar car. The last time you had been in this car, you had been mute, malnourished, and Dabi was digging into you with his knife. You stared at the passenger seat for a moment too long.
“I promise not to stab you again, now hurry up and get in.” You took another moment to appreciate how far you’ve come since the last time you were in this car.
The second your ass was in the seat, Dabi was buckling your seat belt and pulling a hat over your head. “Here put these on too.” He handed you a pair or sunglasses. “We’re going out in disguise.” He smirked, “Well you are, there’s really no way for me to hide this handsome mug.”
“I don’t know. you have white hair now. Match that with some glasses and a bag over your head, and I don’t think anyone would recognize you.”
He reached over you and pulled a pair of sunglasses and a medical mask out of his glove box. “Hmm fresh out of bags. Maybe we should pick some up for later.” He wagged his eyebrows at you.
The wind blew through the open windows as the music surrounded you. For a moment it was easy to close your eyes and pretend this was just a normal day. The past few years didn’t happen, and you were just headed to the store on your day off. You hummed along with the song and even dared to sing a few words.
Dabi suddenly found it hard to concentrate with you singing next to him. He could feel your hum vibrate in his bones. Your words filled his lungs with air while simultaneously making it harder to breath. He’d like to think this was part of your quirk. But something told him it was something else entirely.
Before he could stop himself, his hand found it’s way to your thigh. He had no other intention than just touching you. He just wanted to feel you, feel your skin on his. Your presence filled the car and his hands itched to connect with you in any way they could.
His thumb rubbed absentminded circles as he found himself being hypnotized by your existence. The spell only broken when he pulled into a parking spot. Now reality was crashing back in. He suddenly had the need to rush you back home and lock you away. This world was awful. It didn’t deserve you. “Sorry… Sometimes my singing does that. I didn’t realize I was doing it.” Your hand ran through his hair as if the friction would reboot his thoughts. You could see the confused desire in his eyes start to fade. “I can’t explain it, but just like how my voice can hypnotize, sometimes when I sing it amplifies whatever it is you want in the moment.” You shrugged, “It so rarely happens that I don’t really know what triggers it.”
With a final blink of his eyes his thoughts seemed to clear. The overwhelming desire ebbed but didn’t disappear completely. He was quick to grab your hand as soon as you had both exited the car. “Oh? And what happened to there being too much nitroglycerin on my hands?”
“Shut up.” He yanked your arm rather aggressively as he stormed off into the store.
You weren’t prepared for how ridiculous you would feel. You wish you could take a picture to send to the yourself a few years ago. Here you were with a white haired, former villain Dabi, who had a grocery basket in one hand and your hand in the other. Both of looking totally inconspicuous as the florescent lights reflected off of your sunglasses that he insisted needed to stay on. The borderline elevator music that played in over the speakers just daring you to giggle.
With half of your shopping done you came to the realization that you had been freaking out over nothing. It wasn’t like there was someone hiding behind every corner waiting to drag you back to the lab. Just because it seemed like the world was out to get you didn’t actually mean the world was out to get you.
You were starting to let your guard down just a little bit. You let go of Dabi’s hand for all of ten seconds, which apparently was enough for a lecture. “What do you think you’re doing?”
Your hand hovered over a box of cereal, “Uh… I’m sorry do you not like Lucky Charms? Are you more of a Cinnamon Toast Crunch kinda guy?”
He snagged a box off the shelf before grabbing your hand again. “For my sanity… please don’t let go of my hand.”
“Oh come on I was all of two feet away. What’s going to happen in two feet.”
He lowered his sunglasses so you could see how serious he was. “If we lived in a world where everyone was quirkless… not a lot. But here in this world, where people can do bat shit crazy things… Super speed, portals, explosions, flight, laser beams, do you need me to keep going.”
“Okay I get it. I’m sorry.”
His grip on your hand tightened as he pulled you down the next isle. He was making it really hard to act normal when he insisted on treating you like a child. You gave his hand a tug to get his attention. “Hey look at me.” He hesitated momentarily before turning to look at you and pulling you both to a stop. By the way he was looking at you he knew you were upset, but he looked like the last thing he wanted to do was talk about it. “I get that you’re on edge, but I’m not a child. You gave me this huge speech before we left the house, but now you’re the one freaking out.” You gave him a quick hug. “Out of respect for your paranoia, I promise to stay within arm’s reach. But remember I’m not helpless.”
His shoulders slumped, but he nodded anyways. “Yeah my bad. I think I just underestimated how uncomfortable I’d be.” His shoulder bumped yours. “But until we get back home…I’m going to keep being an overprotective asshole, and you have no choice but to deal with it.” He started his dragging you down isles again. “You may not be a child, but if you pull away from me again, I will literally find a collar and a leash and make you my pet for the day.”
“You’re joking right… right?” He had to be joking. There’s no way he’d follow through with that… right? Part of you knew he honestly would and he’d probably fucking love it.
“Why don’t you keep fucking around and find out?” He smirked which made it even harder to figure out if he was serious or not.
You decided you weren’t going to test him. Not today. Hopefully there would be more trips in your future, and maybe he’d ease up by then. Today he seemed stressed enough to actually snap and follow through with his threat.
He continued to hold the basket for you while he let you reach out and grab whatever you wanted. He wasn’t even really paying attention to the items you were putting in the basket, as his head remained on a swivel, looking for anything suspicious. If he had, he would have noticed it was predominantly junk food. That’s fine. You could stand to gain a few more pounds. He’d make sure to sneak some healthy stuff in there at some point.
You were making your way to check out when he heard a familiar voice calling out to him.
“Dabi? Hey man is that you?” He instinctively placed you behind him as he turned to face his old colleague. “Holy shit it is you! I wasn’t sure because your hair it totally different, but those staples are a dead giveaway. What’s up man? Haven’t seen you in years! What have you been up to?”
You clung to the back of his shirt and you could feel the heat radiating off of him. “I’m doing my own thing now.” His voice was much lower than usual and it sent chills down your spine.
When the mystery man caught on that he wasn’t going to get any more out of him he pressed, “I heard there’s a couple of the guys who’ve been trying to get ahold of you recently. They need help with something. The money’s supposed to be pretty good.”
The man’s eyes shifted to try and get a look at you behind Dabi, but Dabi just shifted to shield you from view. “Not interested. I have enough money.” The man was starting to give him a weird look and it was pissing Dabi off. “Do you have a problem?”
“No, but obviously you do. What crawled up your ass and died? And who’s your new little friend?” He craned his neck to try get a peek at you. “As long as I’ve known you, I never knew you to be the domestic type. She the reason you’ve fallen off the grid?”
Dabi’s hand started to glow with flames. “If you know what’s good for you, you’ll mind your fucking business.”
“Oh shit. She must be something special to get the big bad Dabi playing guard dog.” He lifted his hands up in surrender, “But don’t worry about it, man. I’ll get out of your hair.”
Dabi kept his eyes on him until he was out of sight and quickly turned back to the check-out line, “We need to hurry and get the hell out of here. That guy works for the League as a hitman. It’s possible we didn’t see him by accident.” He ushered you through the line and quickly paid for the few groceries you had and was practically sprinting towards the exit.
You made it back to the car and you let go of his hand to quickly make you way around to the passenger side. You had your hand on the door handle when your instincts started screaming. Your eyes cut to the store and then back to Dabi. “I think someone’s i-“
A hand slammed on top of your mouth as you were pulled backwards and in a whirl of wind and disorienting speed you ended up on the other end of the parking and moments later you saw blue fames spurting off in all directions where you had been standing earlier.
“What a temper that guy has.”
You looked up and saw the man from the store. His quirk must have been super speed and you knew you’d never hear the end of this from Dabi.
His hand gripped your chin, “What’s so special about you huh? What could you possibly have that would domesticate that beast of a man?” He pushed you to your knees in front of him.
Your panic was setting in. All the years of training, all the hard work you put in, and the only thing you could think of was running away. You bottom lip trembled. “I’m quirkless… I’m his… his pet.” You hoped you could find a way to stall for time. You had faith Dabi could handle whoever he was currently fighting and then he’d come for you. You just needed to make sure this guy didn’t run off with you again.
The man laughed loudly, “I have to admit I always thought he was a bit of a freak. But having a quirkless little play thing isn’t what I was expecting.” He turned your head to one side and then the other getting a good look at you. “You sure are fucking pretty though… I guess I can see the appeal. Maybe I’ll take you with me.”
Your fight or flight was kicking in, and you knew for a fact there was no outrunning this man. You activated your quirk and locked eyes with him. This was the first time you had used your quirk offensively in a long time. But it was like riding a bike. First you used your voice. “You don’t want to do that. No, you’re a good boy. You want to let me go.”
You watched as his eyes glassed over briefly before he shook his head. “What the fuck! Get out of my head! Quirkless my ass!” His hand left your chin and back handed you. Your head hit a cement parking divider. So maybe it wasn’t like riding a bike.
You needed to focus. No half assing this. Growing up you had learned that your quirk was like a battery. You could either go at full strength for a short period of time or lower strength for a longer period of time. You just needed to up the strength. “I SAID!”
He sprinted away before you could finish talking. You looked around frantically to see where he went but before you could find him he was sprinting by you and kicking you as he passed. His strategy was smart. You wouldn’t be able to get him if he kept moving. He continued his game of sprinting by you and kicking you or hitting you until you were a bloody mess on the ground. Where the fuck was Dabi?
You were pissed. You had had definitely been through worse. You spit out some blood from your split lip. “You hit like a fucking bitch!” You smeared blood and saliva all over your hands and waited. “Fucking fight me you pussy!”
You listened closely for the familiar sound of him approaching. Right before he got to you you rolled over and grabbed his leg as he attempted to kick you. You tackled him to the ground and shoved your hand in his face smearing your blood all over his face, forcing your blood and spit into his mouth.
He sputtered before shoving you off of him and spitting on you. “What the fuck? You’re fucking disgusting!” He tried to stand up to get away from you, but your quirk was starting to work on him. You blood was slowly paralyzing him. You watched as his eyes started to harden inn fear.
“Great keep those open for me.” You locked eyes with him again. “What did you want with Dabi?”
You watched his thoughts as he showed you instructions from Shigaraki. He was supposed to locate Dabi and ask him what his connection was to the people who worked for your hero agency. Apparently, word had gotten out that he had been hunting people and The League wanted to know why.
You heard footsteps rapidly approaching you. You swung around as fast as you throbbing head would let you. Relief flooded over your entire body when you saw it was Dabi. He skidded to a stop when he saw the state you were in. He looked between you and the now paralyzed man on the ground. “I’m going to fucking kill him.”
The man managed a creepy chuckle. “She must be that siren hero everyone’s looking for huh?” You were impressed he could still talk at this point, but it was obvious the rest of his body was frozen. “They said she was dangerous…she didn’t feel that dangerous when my foot was connecting with her face.”
Dabi let out a feral growl and he stalked over to him hands out ready to burn him to ashes.
“Dabi NO!” You coughed as you grabbed your ribs. “Stop… he can’t move. We can just call Katsuki, he’ll come pick him up.”
Dabi turned to look at you, his eyes practically glowing. “No fucking way. He’s seen you, he knows too much.” The flames in his hands got hotter. “Just look at what he fucking did to you! He’s not leaving here alive. So either you let me burn him and scatter the evidence or you take this fucking knife I have in my pocket and kill him yourself. Either way this asshole dies now. I told him to mind his own fucking business… he signed his own death sentence.”
You stood up and squared off with him. “I said no… We don’t have to kill him. We can just turn him in!”
“YOU CANT BE THAT STUPID!” He ran a frustrated hand through his hair leaving black streak of soot in their wake in his white hair. “We turn him in, he gets arrested. The people who are looking for you… the ‘heroes’ will integrate him and find out your with me. Then it’ll only be a matter of time before we’re on the run.” He reached in his pocket and held out a knife to you, “He dies now. End of discussion. What’ll it be.”
You looked at the knife in his hand before crossing your arms over your chest and averting your eyes.
“That’s what I thought.”
You didn’t watch as he incinerated the man who was helpless to stop it, but you could smell the burning flesh and you could hear the brief scream of agony before it was gone.
Dabi waited until his hands had cooled down before he bent over and scooped you up. “It had to be done.” The car was still running with the driver door open from where he had driven over here and hopped out. He tucked you into the font seat and took a look into the back seat, “Fuck… the ice cream is melting.”
Your eyes bulged at him as he gunned it towards the main road, “You just murdered someone with no sympathy, but heaven forbid the ice cream melts!”
“Actually, I just murdered two people. And I would do it again without hesitation. I was looking forward to that ice cream!”
********
Tags: tags: @falling4fandoms @wifunozomi @here-in-never-land @whore-for-anime @klecksstorys @aurorahoneybuns @theunknownrandom @insane-without-delirium @frenchsfryys @officiallydarkgeek @neofixcs @music-is-all-i-need @katsuki-bakubabe@unadulteratedtastemakerpoetry@dabislittlemouse@aimee1602@pinkhatlizzy @kunaigirlx44 @nii-sanfucker@bestgirlb @silver-stardrop@bakubby99
#bakugo katsuki imagine#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugou x reader#mha bakugou#bhna bakugou#bakugo katsuki#bakugo x reader#dabi my hero academia#dabi imagine#dabi#yandere dabi#dabi x y/n#dabi x you#dabi x reader#dabi bnha#mha dabi#dabi todoroki#mha fanfiction#mha x reader#my hero academia
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Campfire Tales
Part 3 of my series! Thank you for 100+ followers!!!
As usual, do ask me any questions you may have regarding this series!
This is dedicated to both @petrichormeraki and @applepie1000
Enjoy!
Part 2
Part 3 [CURRENT]
Part 4
————————
“You’re gonna burn the ‘mallows”
“Am not”
“Are too”
“Am not”
“Are too”
“Calm down, you two”
Everyone was sitting around the campfire as Tommy brought out the sticks and marshmallows. He had already taken out the rest of the supplies to make snacks and drinks using the fire, doing his best to make sure that everyone was comfortable before he explained his time before joining the hermits.
“You doing alright?”
Tommy stiffened at the sound of being addressed so suddenly. Turning to his side, he saw his older brother smiling up at him. Tommy had been feeling very anxious since the group began their hike up to the campfire, so the sight was comforting for him. He returned the smile to his brother, who extended a hand out to him.
“Let me help you with those, Toms. Just sit down and relax for a bit. You’re probably very nervous.”
Now, Tommy would usually bite back with an overconfident comment, but Tommy didn’t feel like his usual self. Instead, he shrugged his shoulders and handed Grian the remaining supplies. Grian, in turn, grabbed the supplies before sitting his little brother down on a seat. Ruffling his hair with affection, Grian handed Tommy some marshmallows before setting off to finish handing everything out.
“You get near that majestic cat, Iskall, and I will stab you”
“Okay, okay, I’m backing off.”
Peering up, Tommy saw Cleo scoop up a cat, before walking off to sit on a different log seat. Iskall, in turn, nervously laughed as if he just escaped death. ‘Wouldn’t be an understatement.’ Tommy thought with slight amusement. Iskall then turned to Tommy, smiling at the younger boy. Tommy, returned the smile, waving at the man. Iskall saw that as an invitation and proceeded to sit down next to Tommy on the log.
“Nervous?”
“Is it really that obvious?”
“Well, yeah. You started to tone down on the cussing when we arrived at Pirate’s Pier. You stopped cussing in general when we took Captain Puffy’s ship to the campsite, and you haven’t cussed since. You’re also fidgeting around a lot.”
“Shit”
Iskall let out a laugh as Tommy shoved his face into his hands. Patting the young adult’s back with care, he did his best to comfort Tommy.
“Hey, it’s alright. We’ll understand if you decide to stop telling us. But don’t push yourself to either share past your comfort or to coop up all your feelings. It’s not healthy for you, and we’ll all attack you with care and affection until you feel better.”
Tommy barked out a laugh as he playfully pushed away Iskall’s face.
“That’s all you lot have been doing since I arrived. Been acting like I’m your baby brother, or some shit.”
“Well, that’s the case. At least, for one of us.”
At that, the two peered over to Grian, who was putting up the left over supplies with haste, obviously eager to begin unraveling his brother’s pain.
“He seems more hyper than usual”
“I’m pretty sure it’s on the account that he found out that his favorite raccoon is, in fact, his younger brother.”
“I hope he isn’t disappointed-”
Tommy was interrupted when a hand covered his mouth. Feigning irritation, Tommy peered over at the owner of the hand, Iskall. Quirking an eyebrow at him, Tommy gave a pointed look. Iskall huffed before removing his hand from Tommy’s mouth.
“What the hell was that for, Isk-”
“Don’t say that.”
“Don’t say what? Your name?”
“No, Tommy, not that. Don’t say anything about Grian being disappointed in you being his brother. The two of you have been acting like brothers since the day you two met. You guys are two peas in a pod, burrowing in bases together and pranking any fool who let their guard down. He is more than happy to have you as his brother.”
“How can you be so sure when you say that?”
“Because, Tommy, I saw how he reacted. The two of you obviously couldn’t see that well, with the two of you weeping up an ocean-”
“-Did not-”
“-Did too. Anyways, I saw his reaction to putting the pieces together. It was a whole new Grian, one we never got to see before. His facade fell the moment he saw who you were. Something changed in his eyes, and he held you with more pride and love than he ever did before. He’s more than happy to have you as family.”
Tommy furrowed his eyebrows before looking Iskall in the face. He wanted to doubt his words, he really did. He wanted to believe that he didn’t deserve so much of Grian’s love, that he didn’t deserve a special place in his heart. One look at Iskall’s face, however, was more than enough confirmation that he wasn’t being lied to. As much as Tommy wanted to avoid his brother’s love, he knew he couldn’t. All Tommy could do was to just pray to Clara that this brotherly bond would not be torn apart and bombed, just like his last two. He just wanted a family member he could rely on, not one that would break him with betrayal and miscommunication.
“What are you two talking about?”
Tommy peered up to see Grian standing there, munching on a melted marshmallow. Rolling his eyes, Tommy snorted at him as Iskall laughed.
“Talking about how much of a big man Toms is.”
“Hey! Watch the sarcasm! I am a big man!”
Grian snorted before sitting down on the other of Tommy, getting comfortable on the log. The two brothers shared a smile before Tommy faced the rest of the group.
“Everyone ready?”
A chorus of confirmation was given, a single nod to return them. Sighing, Tommy situated himself and cleared his throat.
“I’m severely grateful for all of you, truly. You’ve all looked past the fact that I was a bastard and decided to keep me around. You guys helped me come to terms with things that I once thought was impossible to come to terms with. You’ve all even helped me heal from those stupid, shitty triggers. I really don’t know where I’d be if I hadn’t ended up here, especially looking back to where I was at my previous server.”
He saw everyone’s face gain some form of affection at his words. The pat on his back and the hand on his was all he needed to know that he woild go through with this. They’ve housed him and healed him for over 2 years, they deserved to know what they saved him from.
“Alright, it all started when I got an invite to Dream’s server, the Dream SMP.”
————
Grian didn’t know how to react, how to feel. How could he? It’s not everyday that you find out that the amazing big brothers you idolized weren’t so amazing after all. How could the people that vowed to look after their baby brothers turn around and break the youngest one? Tommy claimed that everything was a misunderstanding, and that he deserved his punishments, but no one deserved punishments that severe.
“-I tried telling them how that made me feel, but Technoblade and Wilbur said that it had to stay in the pit. Tubbo tried to tell me that it wasn’t a big deal, but he was terrified of fireworks for so long after that. Not just fireworks, loud noises in general.”
Grian could tell how uneasy everyone was feeling, but they all understood not to prevent the boy from sharing. He had a lot of built up trauma that he tried forcing away, and that wasn’t healthy for him. He had to get everything off his chest, for the betterment of his mentality and health in general. Grian tried not to grimace as Tommy moved onto the death of the president, how he died of a heart attack. Doing his best to make sure his brother was comfortable, he periodically offered the younger boy drink and snack breaks in order to collect his thoughts. Tommy was grateful for these.
“-He was so mad that we reinstalled a person to be our leader, saying that we betrayed him, but that’s not the case! I promise you it wasn’t! I wouldn’t have intentionally betrayed someone that I saw as my brother, my idol, my...my friend.”
Grian put an arm around the slouching boy and after making a mental note to help him fix his posture offered him a hand. Tommy happily accepted the comfort, trying his best to compose himself.
“And then he...he...”
“What is it, Tommy? What did Techno do?”
“He asked me if I wanted to be a hero. I didn’t even get to properly answer him. I still remember his words, they are forever engraved in my brain. ‘You wanna be a hero, Tommy? Then die like one!’ Then he set fucking withers on my nation, my home. Pathetic, isn’t it? Haha, and that’s not the worst part! That wasn’t even the worst disaster to have happened on that stupid, cursed day. My nation was blown up, and when I had turned to see what happened, I saw Wilbur, standing there, laughing at the chaos. Next thing I knew, dad- er, Phil, he...he killed him. I lost Wilby. I couldn’t save him from his madness.”
His voice had gotten much quieter as he spoke about that painful day. If everyone wasn’t so quiet they would have missed it, the way Tommy’s voice broke and quivered. Trying not to break, he leaned into his older brother, not paying any attention to the height difference. Grian, in turn, was holding his little brother as if the world would crumble if he let go. His brother was dead, the other blinded by his personal morals. And his father, his hero, murdered his son in front of the others. Grian did his best to listen to what Tommy was saying, not wanting him to feel unsupported. He just sat there and listened.
“-He didn’t even say goodbye to me. He just stood there as Dream took me away. Ghostbur went along with me, which I was grateful for, but the company of a ghost can only go so far, especially when it’s of your late brother.”
No one could believe the burdens put upon the shoulders of these two boys. They shouldn’t have had to deal with any of this, yet they were forced to do so. They couldn’t get mad at Tubbo, he didn’t deserve to be despised after having to deal with such a stressful decision at such a young age. Iskall took over trying to comfort Tommy while Grian tried to drink as much water as he could, as if it would drown all the emotions he was feeling. He felt absolutely sick hearing what Dream put his baby brother through. He suddenly felt amazing at being a Dream slayer. He was sure Tommy would find comfort in that. Tommy eventually got to the end of his stay with Techno.
“I was hoping that he would understand why I didn’t stay, why I had to leave. As much as I care for him, he was feeding in to my negative thoughts, and I had to prevent myself from becoming everything I didn’t want to be. He didn’t get it, though. I still saw him as a friend, a brother, but he only saw me as a selfish traitor. He only saw me as someone who wanted to use him as a weapon. Phil called me a traitor, too, and they took down my tower. It’s okay, everyone sees them as ugly pieces of shit. Tubbo and I began to slowly heal our friendship as we prepared for Doomsday, but that’s when things got weird. As Tubbo and I went on a walk to discuss our plan, some weird portal opened up in the ground. I felt weightless as I fell in, and then I ended up here. I’ve been here with you guys ever since.”
Before he could say anything else, Tommy was engulfed into an embrace. Grian buried his brother’s face into his chest, kissing his brother’s hair as he rocked him back and forth. Iskall joined in and rubbed the boy’s back, Mumbo approaching and supporting Grian and Tommy’s weight so they wouldn’t fall. Xisuma stood behind the two, hand on Tommy’s shoulder. One by one, Stress, Scar, Joe, Tango, False, everyone began to join in on the comfort circle to give support to the brothers.
--------
Grian and Tommy had not detached from each other since the campfire. No one pointed that out, not this time. They just gave the birdie personal space with his raccoon of a brother. Everyone gave the two smiles, wishing them goodnight as they all left to stay in the lodging of their choosing in the adventure park. Tommy and Grian waved at them before turning to leave to their choice in lodging. After a while, they arrived to their destination, the Antarctic Empire. After standing in the hall and debating which room to stay in, they eventually decided to stay the night in Grian’s room. Once the were changed for bed, the two just sat on the bed, unsure whether or not they should talk about something or force themselves to sleep. Finally, sucking in a breath of confidence, Tommy spoke up.
“So, since festival week is in a few months, wanna help me plan our outfits and hand out fliers?”
#tommyinnit#hermit!tommy au#memories in the stars#memories in the stars au#I really need to think about other tags to put on these lmao#Grian Wilbur and Techno are triplets au#Grian is an Antarctic Prince#Grian Wilbur Techno and Tommy are brothers au
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Maybe Not Now
During Pavel’s daily torment of him, Emir sees something in him that he hadn’t seen before.
c.w. military whump, sadistic whumper, forced exercise as punishment, insults, degrading language, captivity, alluding to death as an alternative to torture
—
“That’s all for now, soldaty. Back to your dorms and make it neat,” General Levkin called.
With a raise of his palm, collective relief could be heard above the fading grunts. Men rose from the field and dusted their palms on their trousers, snatching up their rifles. Twenty of them clicked sharply as they swung over various shoulders. Some grabbed a drink of water they had been meaning to get for hours as clouds swept over the barren training grounds.
The drills of the day were over.
As the soldiers filed after one another, murmuring too fast and foreign to be kept up with, Emir followed behind with a dry throat. His arms ached. He could hardly remember making that many mistakes in his basic training or what were supposedly called mistakes by Stanislav Levkin’s eye. He always seemed to catch him doing something wrong. Inaccurate aim. Sloppy position. Poor posture.
But he had taken the admonitions, the hits and laps, nodded obediently, straightened his back or concentrated harder on his aim. He didn’t feel like fighting the corrections in front of fifty others and with the amount of sleep hardly managed each night, he didn’t doubt some were his fault. That, and for other reasons. Emir winced as a now clear head focussed on the burning in his bicep.
The place Pavel had rubbed the salt earlier that week.
Maybe yes, sir-ing his way through the drills had been also to spare his throat from overexerting itself more than he had torn in, wailing wordlessly among laughter and pleading in broken Russian to a man who likely hadn’t heard the word in his life. Emir grimaced and, feeling a bump of a body behind him, sped up to climb the stairs. Until he felt a hand pulling him aside.
“Not so fast. Hey, you.” Pavel grinned as he pulled him from formation and back down the steps.
Emir froze and his hand shot to his collar, trying to keep his balance. “Podozhdite—” But Pavel wasn’t one to wait and pulled him fiercely until he tripped on the rocks, barely catching himself on the stone railing. Humiliated, he straightened up glaring. Pavel’s leer was ever present with that same colour of resentment, his eyes cold and devising.
The taller man chuckled. “Did you even complete your recruit training? With how today went, I thought Stas was going to pin you to that target.”
Emir swallowed, trying not to dignify that with a response.
Pavel’s face darkened in silence. “Follow me then get on the fucking ground. I’m not done with you.”
His heart slammed in his throat as he followed without a word, feeling his fingertips grow cold as the group’s noises faded. With each moment, he pushed his feet further to the edges of the terrain where voices ended and the forest began and each step felt harder to take, the closer those trees got. He sucked in a quiet breath when Pavel stopped.
“Drop. Feet together.”
Emir obeyed, falling tense to the pushup form, and dug his nails into the earth for a brief moment, just to feel the cool of the grass, to ground himself. Once, he let his lungs expand with a breath and plunged. Pavel didn’t have to say a word for him to begin and he figured he could save him the trouble. Save it for himself too so he wouldn’t have to pay for it later again.
He bent his elbows, breathing evenly and keeping them tracking alongside his body, until his chest dipped just below the angle of each elbow, then pushed back up, expelling the air. Slow, controlled so his throat wouldn’t burn like it had last time. His eyes were fixed on the trees across from him, the endless stretch of wood and darkness that he watched from his bed sometimes.
It reminded him of the trip he had taken years ago, camping with his cousins after having convinced his mother that he would bring a gun and that everything would go well. Even now, he remembered the distaste in her head shake and the veiled worry in her tone as she had thrown up a hand in defeat.
Fine, abni, but if you get mauled by a bear, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
A smile graced his mouth. It was like he was hardly there anymore. Though a few reps more and he felt a shift in breathing as Pavel sunk down onto the log next to him.
“Feel like this has gotten easier for you. A hundred and fifty reps, nothing, eh?” He chuckled and patted him on the shoulder with enough force that Emir briefly swayed. “Fast learner. You don’t piss me off as much.”
“Then why do you keep hurting me?” Emir asked coolly. His jaw tightened a bit, hearing the huff. As if the question was a challenge.
“Because you’re fun to hurt. You make fun noises, give me—all of us—a good time.”
Pavel’s eye caught a nearby stone and he tapped on his knee thoughtfully as Emir plunged into another graceful pushup. The leer he wore quickly grew crooked and he revelled in the tiny spark of fear that stuttered Emir’s breathing. Hearing it was always wonderful because it meant the little shit was listening to him and on his toes more often than he had been.
“I noticed your back was all fucked up,” Pavel admitted, reaching for the rock which could have easily been five pounds, “when we changed.”
Emir’s eyes stayed frozen on the hollow of a nearby tree. His chest was beginning to burn with the onset of faint panic but he was surprised as it wasn’t his fiftieth repetition yet where the burning usually started. “Is that new?”
The pressure of the rock came fully and at once into the small of his back and he jerked and tightened into a plank. He couldn’t move for a few seconds, realizing Pavel’s intention.
“You haven’t finished. Keep going or the next one goes into your head.”
Admittedly, the next few repetitions of the pushup were only slightly less comfortable, just a tinge less familiar with the weight on his spine and he felt his elbows wobble only the slightest amount. Still, Emir persisted. He had gone no more than ten before the next rock, larger this time, sat in front of the first. Hearing Pavel’s snicker, a silent rage caved in his chest.
“You just had to fall into my hands, huh?” he laughed, patting the ground for another. “Unlucky bastard.”
Emir was beginning to feel the onset of exhaustion seeping into an already worn body. He knew if he collapsed, Pavel would have something to say about it, presumably with his shoe. He winced and exhaled on the wrong motion, had to pause for a moment and focus his breathing before the next plunge and all while ignoring the wry laughter of the man next to him.
“At least I’m not dead,” he muttered.
Pavel stirred before he was about to lay the third rock on the next few ridges of his spine. At first, he scoffed off the response but didn’t resume the motion. He stayed silent for a few moments, letting Emir dip into the next less-than-graceful pushup and watched a bead of sweat roll down his dark temple. Something akin to cynical admiration passed across his eyes.
“You’d rather be alive, here?”
This time, Emir stopped too. He kept his eyes forward, trained as usual, but too long had passed for it to feel like Pavel’s routine. His gaze gradually flickered over to the green eyes and tan skin beside him that so typically fixed him like prey, now staring at him in annoyed curiosity. “Yeah,” he admitted.
The trees rustled softly in the background, dampening the mechanics from the camp as if they were unpleasant, fading memories.
“You’re an idiot.” Pavel let the stone go and smirked to himself at the wince but it was less self-satisfied. “For getting caught and for thinking this is going to be better.”
“My pilot got shot and we crashed directly in front of you,” Emir grumbled, feeling a pulling need to defend his honour and that of his late pilot’s. “Didn’t get caught.” He glanced at Pavel warily and breathed out, seeing no brimming violence under his expression. “Besides, I-I have a family at home to think about.”
The green eyes narrowed suspiciously. “You’re not going home.”
He swallowed, not quite yielding. “Maybe not now.”
“Maybe not ever.”
Emir waited in silence for a minute more, saying little besides the soft, stuttering breaths that whistled in unison with the pines, gull calls, and the dirt twisting under Pavel’s shoe. He sensed it was an exercise to relieve boredom with how often he did it. He didn’t want to think about what Pavel had just said.
He thought about it too often, already.
Slowly, he exhaled and pushed down again under the weight of three rocks, elbows bending alongside his body, and inhaled like it would be his last breath on his—shit, he had lost count. He mechanically continued, hoping that at a certain point, Pavel would stop him and let him go when he had fulfilled the day’s quota of entertainment but then, froze completely upon realizing that it had always been his responsibility to count.
Pavel noticed his uncertainness. “What? You lost count or something?”
Emir did nothing for a minute before lapsing into silent despair and nodding. What was the worst he could do, really? Kick him in the ribs? Big fucking whoop. He waited for the blow anyways, feeling that it would be a welcome relief to the incessant burning in his arms that threatened to have his entire body give out at that moment and crash to the ground onto that asshole’s boot.
But in the meantime, Pavel had been quiet and uncharacteristically thoughtful.
“Get up,” he ordered. “That’s enough.” He pushed himself up from the log and stretched to the clouds, wincing himself at the unwise angle he had been slouching in since Emir had begun the exercise. “Go back to your dorm and don’t let me see you again today.”
Too stunned to move, Emir fixed him with a fearful look until he realized it was a serious order. He could have let himself fall to the ground and really, it was tempting. To lay there and let the exhaustion seep into the dirt but Pavel’s patience already seemed stick-thin and he didn’t want to push today’s generosity. He rolled to let the rocks fall off and bolted to standing, starting his journey back to the camp. When he turned for Pavel’s approval, the man wasn’t moving.
His eyebrows pricked up. “Maybe not now,” he muttered. “Idiot.”
Tagging: @straight-to-the-pain @heathenville
Let me know if you’d like to be added/removed!
#whump#whump writing#military whump#ussr#wartime whump#sadistic whumper#threats#captivity#captive whumpee#forced exercise#overexertion
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Here it is friends. Part one of my Taylor-Swift-nostalgia induced carraville fic. I will be writing a short part two but I figured I’d get this up now and it could be read on its own at this point. I haven’t proof read it so please excuse any mistakes but I hope you enjoy!
Jamie undid his tie. It was a plaid tie, blue instead of red to suggest his neutrality. It was a good day or at least it should’ve been. Liverpool beat Everton two to one, he’d had a good show (no one was harassing him on Twitter yet and Gary had made a few mistakes, Jamie thought that qualified a pretty good show), and he had a date at eleven. He should be fucking buzzing but Jamie just feels the idle hum of numbness. Even the five-goal thriller that was their first game of the night hadn’t got his heart pumping like it used to.
Gary walked in silently, startling Jamie who quickly pulled on a jumper. Not that his state of dress mattered, Gary’s eyes stayed glued to the floor. He walked to the far corner of the dressing room to change out of his suit, as far away from Jamie as possible. He hadn’t said a word to Jamie all night when the cameras weren’t rolling. It hurt. Especially when Gary was so good at acting like everything was fine when the commercial break ended. He even fooled Jamie a few times.
Kelly knocked on the door, making sure they were both decent, before walking in to say goodnight. Jamie watched as Gary smiled at Kelly, as he laughed with her about something. Jamie used to do that: make Gary laugh. Kelly turns her attentions to Jamie. She compliments him on his interview tonight and asks him where he and Tom are going for their date.
“It’s quite late,” she comments, “you can’t really be going to dinner.” Jamie give her a fake laugh.
“I’ve got a reservation and everything Kells. We’re going to that new vegan place. He’s picking me up.” You heard that right: vegan. Because on top of everything, Tom fucking cared about animals and the environment. Jamie wasn’t complaining too much, though. He could suffer through some tofu if it meant not having to go to Gary and his old haunts.
“Ooh!” Kelly said, “do I get to meet him? Redknapp keeps talking about how lovely he is, I figure I could judge for myself.” Ah, yes, Redders. Running into Redders had been an accident. They managed to bump into him at the golf course the week before. Tom was good at golf, unlike Redders, as much as he tried to be. Tom gave him a few pointers, helping Redders fix his posture for his swings. They ended up playing a whole round together while Jamie played ping-pong with an eight-year-old girl in the clubhouse. Redders hadn’t shut up about how Tom’s wonderfulness and his perfect swing since. Jamie nodded at Kelly. He figured he couldn’t do any more damage.
The three of them stood in the parking lot waiting for Tom’s car to pull in. He wasn’t late of course, he never is, they just got out earlier than anticipated. Gary had tried to skitter off to his car but Kelly practically dragged him back up on the curb. Gary, despite trying to put on an agreeable face, looked about as miserable as Jamie felt. Jamie thought he was slightly better at hiding it though.
At 10:59 Tom’s blue Volkswagen pulled in. One minute early. He wore a nice checked shirt with the first few buttons undone. His hair and shirt were miraculously crisp and clean after a full day of work. He looked like a fucking god with his symmetrical face, sharp bone structure, and straight nose. Kelly certainly took note of that. “Our Carra is a lucky man!” She whispered before going over to Tom to introduce herself. Tom shook her hand and complimented her dress which, to be fair, was a very nice floral pattern.
Tom stuck his hand out for Gary to shake. “Hello Gary, my name’s Tom. It’s nice to meet you.” Gary takes a minute to collect himself and takes Tom’s outstretched hand giving it a firm shake.
“It’s nice to meet you as well.” It sounds remarkably fake, of course it does, but Tom doesn’t seem to notice. He just turns towards Jamie with a perfect smile.
“You have such lovely friends, Jamie. It was nice to meet you both.” Jamie wasn’t so sure about that but played along and let Tom walk him to the car. Tom opened Jamie’s door for him before walking around to get in himself. He saw Kelly sling an arm around Gary’s shoulders as they drove away. Jamie took a deep breath and remembered it was all for the best. He reminded himself that this was what he wanted: stability. He didn’t want to fight anymore. The words Gary had said that night still rung in his ears. He was sure his own snarls were not forgotten either.
It started to rain as they parked but Tom had an umbrella. Gary never had an umbrella. You’d think that living in Manchester he’d learn to at least keep one in his car. Instead, he resorted to sprinting away from the rain as fast as he could trying to avoid the rain, he wasn’t as fast as he used to be. But Tom was prepared, he always was. He held the umbrella for the both of them as they walked around to the front of the restaurant.
“James, try the torte it’s quite delicious.” Jamie hated being called James. Absolutely hated it. Not when Gary said it though. His stupid manc accent stretched the vowels into velvet. When Gary said it he felt special. Tom’s polished London accent made him feel posh, pretentious, and twatty. James. Ugh. It was like the word torte. It’s a fucking cake, just call it what it is. Jamie took a bite of the torte. It was good if you ignored the aftertaste of soya in the frosting, a little dry, but Jamie nodded his head like it was an orange mcflurry. He let Tom finish the dessert.
They’re in the car. Tom’s dropping Jamie off at his apartment. Tom must have noticed that Jamie had been quiet and switched the topic to something a little more in his wheelhouse: football. They were talking about England and possible squads for the upcoming international break. Tom started talking about moving Kyle Walker into midfield and Jamie couldn’t take it.
“That’s bollocks. Where is the one place on the field where we actually have players? Fucking midfield. Gareth’s drowning in defenders but not experienced ones. Playing Walker in midfield fucking undermines Henderson and leaves the young centrebacks overexposed.” Tom laughs for some reason. Jamie doesn’t find it funny.
“Well, you would certainly know.” This is what you want, he reminds himself again. Peace, calm, stability. This is happiness. But, fuck, Jamie missed Gary. He missed the challenge. He missed the little crease between Gary’s eyes. He missed Gary’s squeaky voice when he gets worked up. He missed fighting and bickering with Gary over things that didn’t matter. He missed screaming at Gary and Gary screaming back. He missed the really hot sex they’d have after such screaming matches, making Gary scream in a different, more satisfying way. He missed Gary’s laugh, his smile. It seemed to Jamie that neither of them have smiled much since that day. Jamie thought that smiling didn’t seem worth it if Gary wasn’t smiling back.
Jamie checked his phone. It was nearing 1 am. He had a handful of messages from Kelly. Jamie didn’t want to read about how great she thought Tom was, he fucking knew that Tom was great. On paper, he was fucking perfect. The perfect boyfriend. The dream guy. Not for Jamie though. He dreamed of an angry, passionate, crazy, wonderful manc. He opened his messages anyways though, figuring Tom would want to hear what Kelly thought about him.
Jamie. I know you’re on your date but we need to talk. Can you call me? It’s about Gaz. The first one read.
He’s at mine. Really upset. He said not to talk to you so I figure you know what’s going on. That sounded about right. Kelly caring more about Gary’s well being than Gary himself. Gary was too stubborn to care.
Call me please. The last one read. Fuck. They’d made a mess of things. Not only had they made a mess of themselves, but they’d also dragged the others into it.
“Can you pull into that park up there?” Jamie asked Tom. He nodded and turned down the radio, waiting for Jamie to say something more. He didn’t though. Not until he got out of the car and puked some partially digested salad in the grass. Tom came over to him and rested his palm on Jamie’s mid back. Gary used to pet his hair, carding his fingers through it, on those mornings after he’d had a little too much to drink.
Jamie laid on his back in the middle of the parking lot. The rain soaked through his thin shirt in seconds. Tom looked down at him concerned. “I can’t do this, Tom. You’re so lovely. I mean you’re so fucking lovely but I just can’t—”
“I get it, James. You’re still in love with him.” The bastard still looked perfect even drenched with rain. Jamie guessed that he probably looked like a drowned rat. Jamie must have been giving him a confused look because he laughed and explained further. “I saw the way you used to look at him on the tele like he’s the fucking sun. I saw the way you looked at him tonight like being around him was tearing you apart. Besides, I’m pretty sure half the nation knew there was something going on there.” Jamie laughed at that. They had been pretty obvious. And not just Gary, apparently. Apparently, he was just as open of a book. He needed to call Kelly.
She picked up after three rings. “Hi Carra,” she whispered, “needed to get out of the living room, Gaz’s sleeping on my couch.”
“Is he okay?” Jamie asked, not really wanting to hear the answer.
“He’s a wreck, Jamie. He misses you.” I miss him too, Jamie didn’t say, so much.
“Can I come round?” Jamie asked. Kelly said yes so long as Jamie can get Gary the hell out of her living room and gave Carra her address.
Thankfully, Kelly’s place was nearby, about a mile away. Jamie didn’t know where he got the energy considering he was dead on his feet a few minutes before, but he ran there as fast as he possibly could. His water-filled shoes squished loudly with every step. He got there in seven minutes and was panting heavily when he knocked on the door. Kelly let him in wordlessly.
Gary was still sleeping on the couch when he walked into the living room. Kelly gave him a nod and walked into the kitchen. Jamie kneeled next to Gary and cupped his cheek with his palm. Jamie hadn’t realized how much he’d missed that simple feeling. Gary’s forehead was still crinkled in his sleep. His eyes were dark like he hadn’t slept much. Jamie hadn’t either. It was hard to sleep alone, without Gary’s comforting weight on his chest. Jamie took Gary’s hand from where it was tucked under his chin and intertwined their fingers. The weight of Gary’s hand in his set relief running through Jamie’s body. Gary started to stir at that.
“James?” Jamie smiles at that. His stupid name sounds beautiful coming from Gary’s mouth. His eyes weren’t even open yet and Gary already knows it’s him. “What are you doing here?” He opened his eyes slightly but upon seeing Jamie they were wide open. Gary’s eyes were red and bloodshot. Jamie just wanted to yank him into his arms and hug him forever.
“What are you doing here, you muppet? Bothering Kelly at 2 am?” Jamie said playfully. Gary flushed slightly. “Come on, Gaz. Let’s get you home.” He grabbed Gary’s hand to pull him up. Gary stumbled when he tried to take a step. Carra looked down at the empty beer bottles and figured that was why. He grabbed Gary’s arm and slung it over his shoulder. Gary’s head rested in the crook of Jamie’s neck, his soft breathing tickling at the skin there.
“Kelly,” Jamie called softly into the kitchen, “we’re leaving.” She came out to stand in the doorway in her fluffy, pink bunny slippers that Jamie had somehow not noticed before. Jamie thought he should get Gary a pair.
“Set an alarm,” she said, “he wakes up early. Don’t let him bolt.” Jamie figured Gary wouldn’t be racing out of his apartment at 5 am with the hangover he was sure to have but it was still a good idea. Gary was an unpredictable, stubborn bastard at times. Jamie thanked her and helped Gary down to his car.
It was still pouring when they got out of the building because clearly the gods wanted Gary to either sober up or catch his death. Thankfully, in his upset Gary had forgotten to lock the car meaning Carra didn’t have to fumble around for his keys in the current weather. Except, that Gary wouldn’t get into the car. He sprawled his limbs over the door so Jamie couldn’t push him inside.
“Gary, if you don’t get your arse in that car, I’m going to leave you out here to drown.” Obviously, he wasn’t serious but he figured that Gary might be drunk enough not to know that. Gary just smiled up fondly at him and stayed put.
“I love you,” he said, looking like the most radiant, beautiful thing Jamie had ever seen in his life. His hair was a mess, stuck down to his forehead. His cheeks were bright red from a mix of alcohol and the cold. His eyes were still red but god they held all the love in the world. Jamie could see that somehow, after everything, Gary still loved him, truly loved him. After all the things he said, screamed, did, this man--this beautiful man--still loved Jamie every ounce as much as Jamie loved him. It didn’t matter what he should want, he wanted Gary and all of his adorable, infuriating flaws. His recipe to happiness was just that: his own. He didn’t need stability, calm, peace. He needed to feel something.
Jamie cupped his face for the second time that night. He ran his thumb over Gary’s wet, stubbly cheeks. Jamie couldn’t help himself. He kissed Gary with all of the kisses they’d missed in the past two months. The two months of pain, loneliness, desolation. He kissed Gary with all of the love he had in his cold, wet body and Gary did the same. Gary moved slower than Jamie, less frantically but no less enthusiastically. Gary clutched at his jacket like a vice, unwilling to let go. Jamie moved his hands around Gary’s body. He wanted to make sure that everything was still as he remembered it. And it was. Of course, it was. He had Gary in his arms, it didn’t matter that the rain had picked up. Though, he was sure he’d hear about the soggy interior of Gary’s car in the morning. He pulled away reluctantly for breath and rested his forehead against Gary’s.
#carraville#jamie carragher#gary neville#thank you taylor for the inspiration#very loosely inspired by the way I loved you#my fic
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Déjà vu - Part II
Character: Bucky Barnes x Tall!Reader
Summary: Bucky thought his days of memory loss were done. But after a serious head injury, he can’t seem to remember anything past his time in Wakanda. But he’s starting feel like his life is missing more than just memories.
Word Count: 4,000
Part I
For once, Bucky got a good night’s sleep.
But when he woke up, he realized he’d dreamt about Y/N. Whether they were memories or his mind’s own creation, he didn’t know. She didn’t say anything. It was just…her. Like an old film reel without any sound. Just sunlight and clouds and Y/N.
Bucky splashed ice cold water over his face and on the back of his neck.
He stared at his reflection in the mirror.
He was growing frustrated.
Why was his mind so weak? Why couldn’t he just remember?
Bucky gripped the edge of the bathroom counter tightly, almost too tightly.
He went to the kitchen to get some coffee and try to make something good enough to be considered breakfast.
When he walked in, he found Steve and Y/N arguing in hushed whispers.
They were standing close, getting into each other’s faces. With Y/N’s height, they were basically eye to eye. There was no fear in her eyes as she faced the super soldier that probably had 100 pounds of muscle on her.
Bucky had never seen Steve so much as talk to Y/N when they were outside of training or missions.
Bucky was able to figure out that there was some sort of falling out between the two. From what, he had yet to figure out. He tried to just blatantly ask Steve, but he got nothing.
Y/N caught sight of Bucky’s entrance over Steve’s shoulder.
Steve followed her gaze.
Their argument immediately stopped, proving to Bucky that it had most likely been about him.
“Stay–” Y/N started to say to Steve and then her eyes widened, realizing that her words started off in a command. She was always so careful how she worded everything. She couldn’t make a mistake, accidentally taking away someone’s free will.
“Can you please stay out of it?” Y/N saved herself.
Her voice shook and Bucky swore there were tears starting to form in her eyes.
Despite hardly knowing her and Steve being his best friend, Bucky suddenly got angry from seeing Y/N upset. What the hell had Steve said to get her riled up?
Bucky stepped forward. “What’s going on?” But his tone was accusatory and he was glaring at Steve.
“Nothing,” Y/N snapped before rushing out of the kitchen.
As soon as she was gone, Bucky walked further into the room. “What the hell did you say to her, Steve?”
“Don’t worry about it,” Steve grumbled.
“Enough!” Bucky growled.
“I’ve been trying not to bother all of you. I didn’t want to make you guys solely responsible for filling in all the blanks in my head. But there’s something going on and I’m sick of being treated like some idiot.”
Steve seemed taken aback by Bucky’s reaction.
“So what the fuck are you all hiding?” He huffed.
Steve rubbed his face. He knew his friend had a point. “It’s more complicated than that, Bucky.” Then he sighed. “Maybe it’s time to call Shuri.”
“There’s a lot going on in Wakanda right now. She’s the lead inventor of a country and a royal princess. I don’t need to bother her with my head again.”
“She’s your friend, Buck. If you don’t reach out to her or T’Challa, I will.”
Bucky clenched his teeth.
“Why do you have to be stubborn about everything?” Steve accused.
“I’m sick of being everyone’s charity case, Steve. I can’t fix myself. It has to be everyone else that does it for me. I’m tired of it.”
He didn’t let Steve have the last word and stormed out of the kitchen.
—————————
“Can’t you get rid of the resting murder face just for a couple hours, man?” Sam asked Bucky as they stood at the bar.
It was Tony’s birthday.
Bucky was still surprised that Tony had befriended him after all this time, let alone even tolerated him. He murdered the man’s parents. Last Bucky remembered, Tony had been willing to break up the Avengers just to make sure Bucky ended up in prison for the rest of his life.
“I don’t belong here,” Bucky growled to Sam.
Here he stood in an all black suit, with a fancy drink in his hand. He was surrounded by people he didn’t know, most of them either rich or important.
Nat had tried to get him to slick back his hair and put it in a bun. But Bucky swatted her hands away when she even just tried to show him.
The suit was as good as it was going to get.
“Tony and you are friends now. Whether you believe me or not, you are. So try not to look so miserable,” Sam told him calmly.
Bucky just nodded. He knew Sam had a point.
Steve had been jumping around, getting pulled into too many conversations. Everyone wanted their moment with Captain America. It reminded Bucky of his days before he actually fought in the war, how Steve felt like a dancing monkey with no other purpose.
At least he didn’t have to get paraded around like that, Bucky thought to himself.
Then there was a figure walking through the crowd, at least an entire head above everyone else.
Bucky would recognize that height anywhere.
Y/N was strolling through the party like a celestial.
Despite already being significantly tall, she was still wearing four-inch stiletto heels. Her dress somehow managed to be both conservative and sexy, hiding her cleavage but shoving off skin in new places.
Sam watched as Bucky stared.
“Does she have a boyfriend?” Bucky asked shamelessly without taking his eyes off Y/N.
Sam smirked. “Nope.” He took a sip of his drink. “Most men are scared of her. Though…she doesn’t really make it easy for them.”
Bucky chuckled. There was a part of him that was relieved. Jealousy was not a good look on him.
Men and women eyed Y/N. It was hard not too with how much space she took up and how unashamed she went about doing it.
Women envied her statuesque figure. Some just assumed she was a model.
Some men couldn’t help but trail their gaze down her long legs.
“You’re not going to tell me what her deal is, are you?” Bucky asked.
Sam chuckled. “Nope.”
“Why not?”
Sam tossed back his drink then. “There’s a lot of things you have to figure out for yourself, Bucky. Whether that’s from getting your memories back or talking to her yourself, that’s your choice.”
He patted Bucky’s shoulder and mumbled something about going to find Wanda to showcase his new moves on the dance floor.
When Bucky turned back to the bar, he saw that Y/N was on the far end, waiting for her own drink.
Bucky hesitated before slowly moving to her side.
He could tell she immediately felt his presence without even glancing in his direction.
She didn’t say anything to him, but ordered a dirty martini from the bartender.
“Is this the part where you say I look beautiful?” Y/N asked without looking at him. Her tone was cold and bored.
Bucky smiled and shook his head. “Something tells me you would be unimpressed if I tried to give you the compliment.” Then he leaned closer. “Even though it’s a fact.”
“Words don’t really do much for me. Especially when they come from men who want something. In the end, their words are just…empty.”
Bucky chuckled. “You must see the irony, hearing that from you of all people.”
“I give commands, not truth.”
Bucky realized this was the longest he’d ever heard her talk.
“Have you ever used them on me?” He asked.
Y/N’s entire posture stiffened. His question was the thing that finally made her actually look at him.
“I would never do that to you,” there was nothing but sincerity in her statement.
Bucky felt like he’d achieved something by catching her off guard and throwing off her act, even if it was just for a few seconds.
“What if I asked you to?” Bucky asked. His eyes were playful.
Anger flickered across her face. She threw back her martini like it was a drop of water and slammed the glass back onto the bar. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” She growled before shoving past him.
Bucky watched as she walked with purpose. She made her way to Tony, not caring that she was interrupting a conversation. She whispered something in his hear and kissed him on the cheek. Then she gave Pepper a hug.
Bucky watched her entire exit.
—————————————
Y/N walked a step behind Steve and Bucky. It was like they were her two bodyguards.
No matter how much she’d proven herself to the two super soldiers, they both felt the need to look out for her on every mission.
They were in Japan, trying to track down the distributor of a drug that gave people short term effects of being enhanced. Steve and Bucky almost took it personally: somebody advertising that anyone could be like a super soldier, even if it was just for a few hours. What nobody was being told was the side effects almost always ended with the user being put in a coma or having a seizure, until they’re heart just stopped beating altogether.
The Avengers didn’t know that the distributor was waiting for them.
“I don’t like this,” Bucky muttered with a gun at the ready.
“That’s what you always say,” Steve answered quietly.
Suddenly there was a whistling in the air, almost like a bullet.
Steve and Bucky quickly turned at the sound.
But when they both turned to Y/N, she was pulling something out of her neck. It wasn’t a bullet, but it was a similar shape. When she looked at Bucky, her eyes rolled to the back of her head and she started to drop to the ground.
“Y/N!” Bucky called out as he dropped his gun and jumped to her, catching Y/N’s body in his arms before she could hit the ground.
“It’s a tranquilizer,” Bucky grunted.
Then there was a clapping.
Steve stood with his shield held high, putting it and himself protectively in front of Bucky and Y/N, who was now in Bucky’s arms.
Twenty something men stepped out of the darkness in front of them.
Steve and Bucky turned to see twenty more behind them, trapping them in the hallway.
Bucky cursed under his breath. His gun was still on the ground from rushing after Y/N.
A man walked out of the shadows. “We could not have your little siren using that tongue of hers against us, could we?” He said with a thick Japanese accent.
“But she did deliver both of you to me,” he added.
Bucky’s grip on Y/N tightened protectively.
“I will make you a deal,” he continued. “Give us the girl and we will let you walk out of here…alive.”
Steve narrowed his gaze. “I thought it was us you wanted?”
“I have no intention of improving my drug. It is selling fine, even with its unfortunate side effects.” He look at Y/N then. “But when I heard about her…I set my sights on something else entirely.”
“You even think about touching her–” Bucky snarled.
“You are outnumbered, Winter Soldier.”
“Bucky,” Steve warned quietly.
Yes, they could most likely take on all the men. But they couldn’t do that and keep Y/N safe at the same time. If a fight broke out, these men could easily grab her and make a run for it.
It took the team months just to find this hideout and now they knew it had been a set up. They’d wanted the Avengers to find them here.
“Put down your weapons and we will let you say goodbye,” the leader offered.
“Do it, Bucky.” Steve ordered. But he was also telling him, ‘The team has our coordinates. They will find us soon enough.’
Steve put down his shield and held his hands up in surrender.
A man stepped out of the shadows and walked up to Bucky, tearing Y/N’s unconscious body from his arms.
“You hurt her and I’ll save you for last,” Bucky warned venomously.
———————————-
When Y/N came to, there was a device over her mouth and she was locked to a chair.
Steve was off to the side, chained to the floor like some kind of caged animal.
But across from her was Bucky, who looked beaten up. He was chained up similar to Steve, but sitting in a chair underneath a harsh light.
Despite the blood and bruises covering his, when she met his gaze he was trying to tell her everything was OK.
Y/N looked around to see that all the men in the room were wearing devices in their ears.
They knew about her ability. And they were prepared. She couldn’t control them.
“All the legends have been traveling through my world for years. I must say I did not believe them until you started working with the Avengers.”
The same leader walked into the light, introducing himself to Y/N.
“All those mysterious suicides, no proof that they were staged,” he sighed. “It was all your doing, was it not?”
Y/N just glared at him.
He didn’t like that at all.
He turned and punched Bucky across the face. Y/N jumped at the sight and sound.
“They were your doing, yes or no?” He repeated.
Y/N quickly nodded.
“To think of what I could do with your power…” he thought aloud with a smile. “I wanted to see it for myself.” Then he signaled to one of his men, who then dragged in a beaten man who was crying.
“I want you tell him to beat his head into the floor until he kills himself,” the leader ordered.
Y/N looked horrified and stayed still.
Then the leader pointed a gun to Bucky’s head.
“Do it or there will be a bullet in his head.” Then he glanced towards Steve, “Or I will tell you to make Captain Rogers kill your lover.”
Bucky’s heart dropped at the word ‘lover.’
The man walked to Y/N and kneeled before Y/N. “He is your lover, is he not?” Then he read her face. “Or perhaps was… hmm? A lover’s quarrel?” He stood up, turning back to Bucky. “It does not matter. You still love him.”
Y/N was silently crying now.
Meanwhile, Steve and Bucky were desperately fighting against their restraints.
“Tell the man to kill himself or I will shoot the Soldier.” He held the gun to Bucky’s temple.
The man behind Y/N ripped the mouth guard off her face.
The only people in the room who would be effected by her powers was the trembling man on the floor, and Steve and Bucky.
Y/N was shaking and crying.
But she didn’t have a choice.
She gave the man the command and closed her eyes as she heard him beating his head against the hard cement floor.
Y/N was fully sobbing.
She didn’t open her eyes until the room went silent.
The man was laying dead, head and face covered in blood.
Y/N was shaking as she couldn’t take her eyes off the grisly corpse.
“There is more fun to be had,” was all the leader said before he and his men left the room.
Y/N was sobbing again.
“Y/N,” Bucky muttered. “Y/N, look at me.”
But she couldn’t.
“Y/N, there was nothing you could do. You didn’t do this. Do you hear me? This was not you.”
But she wouldn’t listen. She couldn’t even look at Steve and Bucky.
That’s how Tony, Nat, Sam, and Wanda found them.
Bucky didn’t even glance at them as they broke in. His eyes had been glued to Y/N the entire time.
As soon as he was cut free, Bucky booked it to Y/N.
He ripped her restraints.
“I got you, doll. You’re OK. We’re all OK.” He whispered over and over again. He didn’t even bother to see if she could walk, just picked her up in his arms.
Bucky didn’t let anyone get near her. He didn’t even think of letting her out of his arms.
He let Steve explain to the team what had happened.
Bucky didn’t snap out of it until Nat said she was going to take Y/N to her room, that she’d help her clean up and shower.
Bucky couldn’t be there for that.
After he showered too, he found Steve sitting at the kitchen counter, completely lost in his own thoughts.
Bucky leaned against the sink and crossed his arms. “We were together,” he muttered. “Y/N and I were together…and I did something to fuck it up.”
Steve just nodded.
What was the point of feigning ignorance now?
“You were best friends. And I got in the middle of you two because I hurt her.”
Steve nodded again.
Bucky rubbed his face. “What did I do, Steve?”
“You just…You need to talk to her, Bucky.”
—————————
Y/N hadn’t left her bed in 36 hours.
The blinds were down, so she didn’t even know if it was night or day outside. She was in her oversized black sweatshirt with the hood up, ignoring the fact that it was Bucky’s – whether he remembered that or not.
There was a knock on the door.
She assumed it was Nat or Sam bringing her something to eat or drink.
Y/N had made it clear that she wanted to be alone. Even stubborn and insistent Tony finally listened and gave her the space.
Y/N slowly made her way to the door, imagining she probably looks like a zombie.
But it wasn’t Sam or Nat on the other side of the door.
Bucky was patiently waiting.
“What are you doing here?” She whispered.
“I came to check on you.”
“I’m fine,” she lied.
“Can I…I just need…” Bucky stuttered through what he was trying to ask. “Fuck it,” he finally muttered before pulling Y/N into his arms.
He expected her to yell at him or shove him away.
But Y/N just let him pull her into his arms. She even gripped him tightly.
When he pulled away, Y/N was crying.
Embarrassed, she stepped away and quickly tried to wipe away the tears.
“Come here, doll.” Bucky whispered and pulled her back into his arms.
Once again, she didn’t fight him.
30 minutes later, they were sitting on the couch of Y/N’s room.
There was food half touched on the coffee table and Y/N was holding a glass of vodka on the rocks, compliments of Natasha. She’d stopped by with food and alcohol for her, surprised to find Bucky in her room.
Nat had given Y/N a silent look that asked, “Want me to get rid of him?”
But Y/N had merely shook her head.
Bucky didn’t ask any questions. The silence in the room didn’t make him uncomfortable. He just waited, let Y/N make the first move.
“You used to love me,” Y/N mumbled.
Bucky immediately wanted to correct her, but he knew this wasn’t his time to talk.
“We were together for…for over 3 years. In the beginning, we tried to keep it a secret.” She laughed darkly. “Between Nat and Clint, you can imagine how long that lasted.”
She took a sip of vodka.
“There was a new threat from Hydra. Nothing out of the ordinary. Just them showing up on the maps again. You had a confrontation with them, but you never told me what happened.” She swallowed. “It…panicked you.” Her eyes glazed over as the memory washed over her. “You started getting bad nightmares again. Your PTSD got worse. There was a night where you – I shouldn’t have woken you up the way I did.”
But she didn’t go into more detail.
Bucky could figure out what happened.
“You wouldn’t even let yourself sleep after that. You were exhausted and irritable. You started putting distance between us. You wouldn’t sleep in the same room as me. You wouldn’t even talk me anymore.”
A single tear fell down Y/N’s cheek and she wiped it away as she sniffled. “Then you…uhh… you broke up with me. You said you didn’t love me anymore. Said you might never have. You claimed you didn’t think you were even capable of love after the mess Hydra had made of your mind.”
Y/N cleared her throat as if it would also clear away all the emotions that escaped.
“That was 2 months before you took that hit and lost your memories.”
“Y/N, I–”
“I don’t want you to say anything,” Y/N cut him off. But it wasn’t a command from her abilities. “Please, just…I can’t hear it.”
Bucky was torn.
“You don’t remember me. You don’t remember us. So whatever you’re about to say…it doesn’t matter.”
Bucky took in a deep breath. “Do you want me to leave?”
Y/N nodded.
——————————
“I broke up with her to keep her safe,” Bucky thought aloud to Steve.
He hunted down his best friend after Y/N told him everything. There was nothing to stop Steve from giving his side of the story now.
Steve nodded.
“I did love her. I lied so she wouldn’t fight for me. I broke her heart so she would hate me.”
“Yeah, Buck.”
Bucky put his face in his hands.
“It was some Hydra agent. He didn’t have anything on you. All he had to do was say Y/N’s name and you lost it. You were convinced they’d come after her because of you. No matter what any of us said, you wouldn’t listen.”
Steve stared into his eyes. “You really loved her, Buck. I’ve never seen someone make you so happy. You started smiling and laughing – it was constant.”
“I still love her,” Bucky replied instantly. “I can’t…I can’t remember. But I swear, Steve, I can still feel it. That first time I saw her, I just had this feeling that I’ve never remembered having before.”
“You saw her,” Steve told him. “When she was invisible to so many people, it was the opposite for you. Like she was the only woman you could see.” Steve smirked then. “She didn’t make it easy for you. At the beginning, she pushed you away more than she let you in.” Then Steve’s smirk disappeared. “That’s why you hurt her so badly. She’d been waiting for the floor to drop out from underneath her for so long…and then you were the one to push her down.”
“You broke her heart,” Steve declared quietly.
Bucky nodded, already having figured out that was exactly what happened.
“And you two?” He asked Steve.
“I tried to stop it. I tried to tell her what was going through your head, that you hadn’t meant what you said. But she wouldn’t listen. And I wouldn’t stop. So, she pushed me away. Stopped talking to me. Would leave a room any time I walked into it. I guess just seeing me reminded her of you.”
Not only did Bucky rip himself out of her life, he unintentionally ripped Steve away too.
“When I told her what happened to you, that you didn’t remember her…she said it was for the best. She thought things would be easier that way.”
“We all tried to push you two back towards each other. But Y/N wasn’t having any of it.”
Steve sighed. “She’s scared. I know that now. She doesn’t want to get her heart broken again. She just figures the exact same thing would happen all over again.”
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Part 3
Honestly, first part had the lowest amount comments/reblogs of any story I’ve ever written. I’m assuming because I put that it was Tall!Reader. Writers can describe the reader as petite and short, and get away with it. But I guess people draw the line at the reader being tall. 🙄😑
#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes one shot#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes reader insert#bucky angst#bucky barnes angst#marvel one shot#marvel fic#marvel reader insert#winter soldier reader insert#deja vu part 2#deja vu part ii#bucky barnes fanfic#winter soldier x reader#steve rogers & reader#bucky one shot
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A weird request but I'm shooting my shot: Kohga did such a good job of shapeshifting into Urbosa in AoC... any chance he'd try to do it again just to see what it's like to fuck in a female-presenting body? 😅
Oooooh this is a SPICY idea. You guys have such good ideas, it's impossible to get anything else done around here. Let me tell you how I'D think it'd go.
Kohga loved men. Big, burly men who could throw him across the room like a rag doll, fuck his ass into oblivion, and only call him back when they wanted another spin. Unfortunately, getting fucked was growing tiresome. Wild of HIM to say, he was aware. But as he sat there at a stable, drinking and being alone, he realized; there were so many men here, and while he could charm his way into their pants, he wanted to mix it up. Then it occurred to him. He could go for the straight boys. The cuties who'd give their boots up for a chance to talk to a girl. So.
Why not BE just that dream girl for a night? Finishing off his drink, he walked out of the stable, and stepped foot outside. He used the tranquil river water as a mirror, and sgape shifted into Urbosa.
"Er...maybe not her. If she found out, not even Sooga could save me. Let's keep the base, change a few things here…"
Long, red hair, right up to the ass (Kohga was most saddened to see this go, but unfortunately Gerudo women could NOT handle that kinda power), held up in a simple ponytail. Nice, full nose, plush pink lips, and of course, those trademark gerudo hips. Couple that with a nice red skirt (long enough to cover, but not completely. Men loved some leg), and a nice top piece that BARELY pardoned itself from being a bra. He had to hand it to himself, he got CANS. A little bit of jewelry, some heels, and he looked BEGGING to get fucked.
"Alright….'Kiki', let's get you some dick. Kiki sounds right. Assuming they'll even remember me past these titties."
He walked back inside, casually, and holy SHIT did he get looks. Starved boys eager for a meal, and Kohga was SERVING. He fought the urge to grin, and put up a docile front. Gerudo women were strong, fierce, but not this one. At least, not yet. He wanted to draw these poor unfortunate souls in before he showed any of his true colors.
"Excuse me, I hate to bother you, but may I sit with the three of you? I hate to be all by my lonesome."
Watching them scatter to get him a chair was hilarious, he nearly busted up laughing. The cute one with white hair beat them to it though, and Kohga nodded in appreciation.
"Thank you. That was terribly sweet of you."
A little scratch to the chin nearly sent the guy to the floor. How cute. One of the men tried not to sound too giddy, but he failed.
"So! What's your name? And how come you're here by yourself?"
"Kiki. And I was supposed to meet someone for a date, but...well. That was hours ago. I wanted to walk back home, but it's so cold, and it's so far...I didn't want to be alone."
Course that riled them up. A beautiful woman, heart broken and lonely? Straight guys ate that bullshit up like pigs to slop.
"What?! No way, someone stood you up?"
"What an idiot!"
"And rude! Giving such a pretty lady a hard time!"
"Would I deserve a hard time if I wasn't beautiful?"
He watched as the red headed guy stammered, worried he fucked up, before Kohga tossed his head back and laughed, lightly swatting his hand.
"Oh come on, I'm just giving you a hard time!"
The three of them chuckled in relief, and Kohga couldn’t believe he was just. SO charming, form be dammed. He folded one leg over the other, and noticed their eyes followed. No one could REALLY resist gerudo legs.
"So what are YOU three doing here on your own? Waiting on your lady friends?"
They all went silent on that question, and he faked surprise. No shit they were single. Only whores wanted these losers, cute as they were (he was the whore, case there was any confusion there).
"Sa'oten! You three absolute adorable voes? All alone? Well. Least that means no one will be upset with me if I do this."
He scanned over his pick of the litter, and decided on the one with long, brown ish hair. He was a bit thin from being a dream boat, but he was honestly pretty damn cute. He held onto that sharp chin, and pulled him into a nice, long kiss. He kept it slow, smooth, really putting on a show for the other two. How greedy their eyes were. He peeled away from him, not even trying to hide his massive grin. They gawked at him, completely stunned that some gerudo woman was suddenly all over them. He fixed his smudged makeup, before folding his arms over his chest, right under his massive rack.
"Now, I don't mean to be rude, but I'm rather parched. Which of you boys wants to buy me a drink?"
You've never seen three men raise their hands up so quickly in all your life.
"No please, I do believe I've had enough!"
'Kiki' laughed, swatting away another offer for a drink. He made these three send so many rupees on him. Drinks, flowers, and lots, and lots of food. He couldn’t help it. The way they threw themselves at her at any opportunity just made him absolutely giddy. Though he was happy he cut himself off, less he be too tired for the REAL main course of the night. After some pretty eyes (and a mourning wallet), Kohga got them to pay for a room, just for the four of them. Course, Kiki was far too tipsy to walk there on her own, so they had to help her into the large, plush bed. In reality he just wanted to be carried, but hey, he deserved the special treatment.
"Oh...Sarqso. You three made my night much less lonely."
He could tell these guys were lost. They didn't know if she was inviting them to join, so Kiki had to make it rather obvious. He un did the strap to the bra, before peeling it away, and letting it fall to the floor. God, he really did give himself a pair of double D's, even he had to take a quick second to admire them. He pointed to the one who hadn't gotten any affection all night (a cute stable hand with messy, messy hair), and gestured him forward.
"Please. Allow me to return the favor."
He hesitated, clearly nervous, before Kiki took his hands, and placed them right at her chest. Granted Kohga wasn't much of a chest guy, but it seemed unfair to NOT let them play with them. And play with them he did. He cupped and massaged at her chest, all while Kiki raked her fingers through his hair. Such a cute boy. She turned her glance to the other two, and she sighed, as if full of woe.
"I don't think he'll let me reach over to take off the rest of these pesky clothes. Would one of you be a dear and-"
The white haired man jabbed the other in the gut, beating him to the bed. It made Kiki laugh, and she helped him by lifting her legs. Off came the skirt, and the pretty little panties. A nice patch of red hair highlighted that fair, dark skin. Kohga just couldn’t stop being fine. She no longer felt the need to bark orders, and let the boys do as they pleased. For now. One kept playing with her tits, occasionally suckling on them, one kept rubbing his tongue over hers, and the last fellow was copping a good feel for her legs. She chuckled as she parted the kiss, gliding her hand across his scalp, before getting a handful of that nice, red hair.
"Hmmm...you boys are excited. I like that, really I do. Now, pants down, let me see my new toys."
She had no problems playing with her breasts as motivation, occasionally pinching and flicking at her own nipples. She wanted to drool. A cock with an upward curve, one that was straight, and one that seemed to curve downward. Fun variety. She ended up with the upwards curvy one, and the white haired man had no qualms rubbing it in their faces. He loomed over her, rubbing his hard cock against her clit, making Kiki jump a bit. That was...sensitive. He looked at her confused, before she giggled.
"Sorry, guys usually hit it from the back, so this is a first. Don't do me gentle though, I'm a real tough cookie."
He nodded, pushing his tip inside those wet pussy lips. It was enough for her to arch her back, biting her bottom lip. Oh, he was going to get fucked SO good. He started to move slowly, letting her get used to him, before she motioned for the other two.
"Come on, I still have a mouth and a hand for you boys~"
The red head and his little friend rose to the opportunity. Hell, bed head made it more fun by riding her pretty face. Not just shoving his whole cock down her throat, not JUST shoving those balls in her face, but letting him toy with her huge, perfect titties. Kiki used her free hand to stroke the other cock in her hand, and she was in heaven. Her lips sucked and slurped at cock, smearing lipstick and drool all over it, her hand pumped that cock in her hand, and her pussy seemed to welcome the steady thrusts of a nice, full cock.
"Come on boys, be a bit MEAN to me here!"
Kiki complained, pulling her face away from the nice, throbbing cock for a moment. She was about to talk so much more shit, before the boys started to take the hint. One started to slap and yank at her breasts, one rubbed her clit in fast, aggressive circles, and one wrapped his hands around her throat, forcing her to gag and slobber all over that cock. She could feel drool dribble down her face, feel her pussy juices soak onto the sheets, and she even found her titties slick with little dribbles of her own milk. You'd think, as a gay man, this would be super gross.
You'd be wrong. Getting throat fucked, getting a new hole absolutely RAMMED, not to mention huge, slick breasts that seemed irresistible to a good suckling, Kohga was in absolute heaven. So much so that when the man above her pulled away, letting her breathe, she was moaning like a total whore.
"Oh you boys are BAD. Come on, fuck me. Cover me in all that hot cum, shove it right inside of me too. I want to taste how hungry you boys are for me, I wanna feel your hot cream inside of me. So pull up your FUCKING girdles, and FUCK ME."
Kiki was a VERY demanding woman. And despite the submissive posture, she was VERY much in charge. They kept as she commanded, harder, faster, swears under their breaths, the room filled with the yummy sound of horny, lust filled men. Then they came. Oh they came. Kiki felt a load shoved in her throat, felt ribbons of cum land on her tits and her stomach, and finally, finally, cum right into her pussy. Kohga held his legs nice and high for that, crying out in relief. Oh, so much thick, delicious cum from those nice, juicy cocks. They sat there, throwing their seed at her, before they seemed to pull away. Kiki finally found her breath, and she couldn't help but chuckle.
"Oh...you boys needed that. All this tasty cum, just for me."
Kiki pushed them off of her, before getting on her hands and knees, shaking her butt from side to side.
"Now. I want one under me, one in the back, and one in the front."
There was no movement, and she slammed her fist into the wall beside her.
"Dicks. Now."
In both arousal and fear, they gave her what she wanted. One snaked underneath her, pushing his cock into her already stuffed hole, while one pushed himself right into her ass. Now THAT was an all too familiar sensation. She chuckled, massaging the balls in front of her.
"Oh, and spank me. Lots of spanking. I want it to-ooh!"
Kiki didn't wait long before an open palm struck her bare ass. She giggled, shoving her face against the cock in front of her.
"Ooh you are a MEAN boy. Do it again, mark my ass-oh shit!!~"
One thing Kohga and Kiki had in common; they both LOVED a good, hard spanking. That, and the notion of LOTS more cum. And neither were scared to work for it.
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Kiki looked back at the slumbering pile of men next to her. Five rounds each, she pulled a nice fifteen loads from these horny lil puppies. Not too bad for Kiki, but for Kohga? Bit on the weak side. Kiki was just as cruel though; making them kiss each other for her, making them lick and slurp at her cum soaked pussy- they did everything she wanted. She fixed herself up a bit, lapping any cum she had left on her face (no wasting food here), and tossing her useless panties on the pile of slumbering men. Just for something for them to fight over later, before walking out of the stable. Sooga was there, just how he commanded.
"There you are! I'm ready to go home!"
Sooga looked her up and down, questionably.
"May I ask...why?"
"Can't I just look pretty? Besides, I'm finally your height now!"
Kiki wrapped her arms around him, stuffing his face in her bust. He groaned, raising a hand in objection.
"I MUCH prefer Master Kohga’s chest, if you don't mind."
Kohga giggled, leaping into his arms and turning back to his usual, perfect self.
"You want Kohga’s chest, eh? Come on, let's go home. I'm in the mood to indulge you a little, Soogy~"
Kohga was FAR from done for tonight.
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A Place On Earth
Yanking the door open with Butchers name on his lips, he came face to face with MM and Butcher standing a bit of a way behind him. The events that lead to that point crashed into him and his heart became deafening in his ears, he could feel the knife buried into his ribs but couldn’t feel the object no matter how much he grasped at it.
Second chapter of I Just Died In Your Arms Tonight.
Hughie stared blankly at the ceiling, blinking at the shocking white that surrounded him, everything felt numb and he was brought back to when he had gotten his wisdom teeth removed years ago.
Awareness took its time visiting Hughie and when it granted him enough presence he sat up with a grunt, his chest felt oddly tight for some reason and when his hand brushed a certain area he shivered.
Some deep part of his lizard brain was screaming at him that something was wrong, that he needed to get up and leave now. Hughie had successfully gotten out of the bed when he noticed his attire, plaid pajama pants and an oversized shirt that he had never seen before.
The numbness was receding and with it Hughie realized he wasn’t in his apartment, he was in one of the safehouses. Yanking the door open with Butchers name on his lips, he came face to face with MM and Butcher standing a bit of a way behind him.
The events that lead to that point crashed into him and his heart became deafening in his ears, he could feel the knife buried into his ribs but couldn’t feel the object no matter how much he grasped at it.
Hughie couldn’t breathe again; his lungs were filled with blood and it caked his throat as thoroughly as tar. A hand suddenly grabbed his shoulder and Hughie fought it back with a strangled shout, loud buzzing was just barely audible over his heart.
Instead of Soldier Boy a very blurry but familiar face swam into his view, blinking hard and rubbing at his eyes Hughie was better able to see the man kneeling before him.
The familiar rumble and what it was saying was lost to Hughie, as was the expression the man wore. Hughie forced air into his burning lungs.
“I- didn’t.”
It was too hard to breathe, he was drowning again, the bones from his shattered ribs were pressing into his only good lung.
“I didn’t know. Swear to god I didn’t-.”
The way Butcher had looked at him with horror filled his mind and spots danced around his vision, from his shaky gaze he watched Butcher rise and walk off.
Fuck, was the man going to bring out his crowbar to see what he could come back from?
MM was suddenly kneeling before him; both his hands were held up and his posture was purposefully non-threatening. His lips moved continuously, and Hughie found himself trying to focus on them. When MM saw the spark of awareness, he tried to help the man out.
“It’s ok now, just breathe. In and out. Ain’t nothing going to happen to you while I’m here. Easy Hughie, in and out.”
He began taking exaggerated breaths and Hughie tried to match them with unsuccess, time disappeared and was filled with Hughie taking in shuttering breaths to match MM’s exaggerated ones with occasional praises from the medic about how Hughie was doing.
Finally oxygen was reaching it’s necessary locations in his body and Hughie realized he was sitting on the floor. He glanced around the room wide eyed, searching for something but even Hughie didn’t know what he was looking for.
MM had lowered his hands and gave the man a small smile, “there we go. Now, I’m going to grab you some water ok?”
Hughie gave a jerky nod and as MM rose to retrieve said water, he wondered where the rest were. Though he mainly wondered were Butcher had stalked off to after his brief appearance.
MM made sure he was noticed before he crouched in front of him, every move was steady and easy for the shaken man to be able to track.
When he held out the water bottle Hughie thanked him, though he knew that his words were likely to jumbled for the other to understand when even he, the man speaking couldn’t understand what words escaped his lips.
It wasn’t until Hughie was reaching out to grab the bottle that he realized how badly his hand was shaking and he needed both hands to even grip the plastic. He took two sips under MM’s watchful eye before setting it down now to him, most likely making sure the man didn’t drown while trying to drink.
Hughie had calmed down from his earlier moment of panic, but now fear had replaced the panic that consumed him.
“What- “
He cleared his throat in hopes that the other words he had to say would come out less cracked.
“What’s the plan?”
MM rose an eyebrow at the question and Hughie wished he would just rip the band-aid off and tell him already. Explain to him how they were going to finish him and what they would do with the pieces, logically Hughie knew his true corpse would most likely resemble Translucants’s remains.
“So far the plan is to stay low, figure some things out before putting together a real plan on how to take care of SB.”
Despite MM not saying the full name, Hughie still flinched and saw those hazel eyes staring absolutely bored over his whole existence. MM didn’t say anything but was watching Hughie intently after discussing the groups plan of action, no matter how flimsy it currently sounded.
“No, I mean- What’s the plan for me? How are you going to-“
Hughie couldn’t finish the question. The words got trapped in his throat, stuck around the thick blood that was creeping ever forward. His chest felt tight once again.
MM wasn’t looking at him now but when he did look at Hughie his eyes displayed his inner distress, “Hughie man, we ain’t going to kill you.”
Hughie felt a sudden burst of hysteria.
“Don’t lie to try and protect my feelings MM. I fucking died alright?! Yet here I am! I’m a godamn Supe and who the fuck knows what powers I have. You, Frenchie and Kimiko may learn to be ok with that but Butcher-. He stared at me like I was a monster and I’m with him on that one.”
MM’s face morphed into a scowl, he obviously wanted to fight everything Hughie had said but instead he bit his tongue, and he shook his head.
“Almost everything you just said was bullshit man, and you need to listen close when I say that no matter what you can do it’ll never make you a monster.”
Hughie believed that MM believed his own words, but that didn’t change the fact he was a Supe in a relationship with a man who hated Supes more than anything. Personally he would rather everything that was going to happen, happen now rather than waiting for months for the other shoe to drop.
When it did Hughie doubted there’d be much left of him anywhere- and oh god his father.
“Ok, ok. Look MM you need to promise me something.”
The man gave him a long look before sighing, “I won’t promise anything ‘till I hear what it is. I learned my lesson a long time ago with Butcher.”
Hughie nodded and took a steading breath before he went forward.
“Look when I die for real and permanently, however that works. You have to give my dad an actual body to bury. I don’t care if Frenchie fixes up a mannequin, he won’t look that close once he thinks it’s me, but he needs a place to actually mourn at. I don’t- he can’t spend the rest of his life waiting for me to come home, he doesn’t deserve that.”
Somewhere in Hughie’s youth he developed an intense fear of going missing, not just because of what it meant for Hughie and the whole human trafficking thing. Mainly the fear surrounded what effect it would have on his father.
Hughie’s mother walking out the door and dissolving into the mist had crushed a large part of the man’s soul. If his son were to do the same, it would destroy whatever was left of Hugh.
MM looked at him with a hard expression before he let out a sigh and rubbed the back of his head.
“Yeah, I promise.”
Hughie let out a breath of relief, at least his father would find some semblance of peace though he knew it wouldn’t ease the pain. MM was staring at him again and Hughie gave him a weak smile, which caused the man to shake his head and stand up.
“I don’t know what’s goin’ on inside that head of yours, but I can tell you it’s way off.”
Hughie let out a small huff of laughter, and MM looked down with an odd expression.
“Now first of all, don’t panic. Butcher has something he wants to say to you. We’ll all be in the other room just in case things go south, but you should hear him out.”
Instantly Hughie’s heart picked up, thrumming adrenaline throughout his body by the mere idea of the man glowering down at him. However, MM looked so assured that everything would be alright that Hughie could only nod numbly.
He already had the man’s assurance that his father would have proper closure, Hughie couldn’t very well demand more from the group after unintentionally fooling them for however long he had compound V running through his veins.
MM leaned down to clasp Hughie’s shoulder and giving a reassuring squeeze, before nodding one last time and leaving the room.
Hughie stared at the suspiciously stained floor underneath of him, looking for answers about what he was or even just a purpose for all that he had been through meant. He heard a door open, heavy footstep pausing just briefly in the doorframe before the door creaked shut.
For many people being so close to an inevitable demise would act as a chance to confirm their faith or find a new. Any other person would be considering their fate, trying to make amends with everything that they had done wrong and begging for forgiveness.
Yet all Hughie could think of was memories his mother’s smile as she prompted a dance to a Billy Joel song. His father who had been through agony but still tried to stay approachable for his son, and who tried to maintain a bond with Hughie.
Robin who made him feel alive and like a human for the first time in his life, who cracked his shell wide open and let him experience how fun everything could be. Kimiko who was often so closed off but still learned ASL with him, she figured it long before he did but took the time to help him along so they could talk freely.
Frenchie would always call him petite and smile like he was legitimately happy to see him every time the pair met up. It didn’t matter if it had been days since Hughie saw him or just hours, the man always seemed excited to see him alive.
Mother’s Milk was a mother hen, always pestering Hughie about how much he was eating or sleeping, all with concern hidden firmly under a strong exterior.
Annie, who he now considered his closest and best friend. She would be the angriest towards Butcher when the man figured out how to kill a Lazarus Supe, with any luck they wouldn’t kill each other in the fallout of the reveal.
Finally Billy, who hated Supes as if it was the only thing keeping him alive. Perhaps it was the thing keeping him alive, allowing him to survive things that no mortal could have lived through.
Hughie could remember Billy’s arms around him, pulling him firmly against his body whether it was when they were wrapped together post cotial, or in the early morning when Butcher woke up long before he did and held the younger man tightly.
He could hear Billy whispering in his ear how the man would keep Hughie safe, no matter the cost. Finally, he could see Billy staring down at him with a look of pure despair as he watched Hughie bleed out.
Hughie knew that the despair was driven out of his apparent death and that considering what he was now that he would be lucky beyond belief if Butcher would even look at him without animosity.
His gaze kept firmly onto the floor until dark clothed legs stepped in front of him, familiar boots filled his vision and despite his best-efforts Hughie’s breath still caught in his chest.
Hughie watched as dark legs bent and Butcher was kneeling in front of him, but kept his eyes away from the older mans face.
It wasn’t until Butcher let out a breath that could be mistaken for a sigh that Hughie braved a look at the other man. Butchers face was tight, every stress line was exasperated, and his lips were pulled together.
Butcher’s jaw worked for a long few moments before he looked back up, “alright lad just hear me out.”
#rainbowwritesstuff#tw: panic attack#Butchie#billy x hughie#billy butcher#hughie campbell#mother's milk#secretly a Supe Hughie
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emotions, as experienced by toni shalifoe - 2
episode 2
You open your eyes to shock.
Marty is there still, you’re there still, the island is still there, and the reality of having been in a fucking plane crash is there still too. You’re a bit immobilized by the stark reality of it all. Holding on to Marty for whatever warmth you can, you watch as Leah rolls through with news of another cell phone. You stay behind as the girls minus you and Martha follow her to Jeanette’s grave. From the secondhand account Fatin gives when they get back, Rachel gives it to Leah about not getting the rest of them fast enough or something. It doesn’t matter. She couldn’t call anyone. Nothing changed. You’re still stuck.
You spend the morning trying to keep Marty in one spot, trying your best to help with her ankle. You aren’t very good at it, and you both know it. Its frustrating to feel whole and useless while your best friend is down and out. Your mood isn't improved after a particular blonde rolls through to where you two are sitting and Martha’s gazing at her like she hung the moon and stars. You try and shoo her away in your special language of aggression and profanity, but it’s as effective as mixing oil in water, and if anything makes blondie double down on her chipper helpfulness. You about shit yourself when she tries to tell you that negative energy is the biggest impediment to patient recovery, and before you have the ability to even process that absolute serve of passive aggressiveness, she’s all smiles and perfect posture as she fucks off to get Marty a drink. It has to be the trauma of the crash you think. That’s the only acceptable reason cowgirl barbie got the last word.
The alphas of the group decide it’s time to go figure out what they can see from the top of the mountain, and there’s no way in hell you’re volunteering and abandoning Marty with strangers (or Shelby), so you’re relieved when they recruit her for their little day trip and get out of there. Of course she agrees with a smile and nod, which is infuriating, but you can’t help but follow her with your eyes as she scampers off behind Rachel and Leah. She’s got Marty’s shoes from yesterday and somehow that still gets under your skin. Like she has to use them. Like she has a right to.
Later you finally land on something you think will help Marty, get her in a piggyback carry and head off, intent on getting her injured foot in icy cold seawater. It may not be the splint Shelby alleged she could put it in, but it would help ease the aching muscles in your best friends foot (or at least you hoped). You try and lighten the mood, singing that goofy song you both love, trying to forget that you two aren’t in the bestie summer vacation you’d hoped for and instead are broken on an island and scared shitless that it’ll stay that way. You get her settled and take a seat next to her and you’ve barely blinked before she’s yammering away about fucking Shelby and how her dad will exercise his White Man Privilege to get them all saved, manifest destinying her way into Marty’s life with a private jet off the island or some shit like that. It hurts, if you’re being honest with yourself. You’ve tried to make her feel better by carrying her away from the others to just catch a breath, check in, but she just keep bringing Shelby into this narrative, and you snap at her. You feel bad but for fucks sake, can’t Martha see how this is going to play out? You’ve seen girls like this, people like this. You know that they see people like you and Martha, from areas without a lot to envy, and think that you need to be saved. That with some attention and probably Jesus, they can fix you. But you know that you’re nothing but a project for them to stick in their back pocket as their “saved a minority” summer experience and kick to the curb once they’ve gotten enough instagram pictures of you to prove they helped you. Then they dash off back to their own McMansions and Sweet 16 BMW birthday gifts with the big bows on the hood, and you are in the same place you were before, but with less self respect because they dined and dashed on your pride.
And you can tell that you hurt her feelings. You feel the pang of fucking up as she quiets and looks away, and you’re back in that familiar place of guilty of hurting someone. You honestly do feel bad, but you’d rather walk into the ocean and drown than let her know how big of a fucking problem you feel Shelby is, so you tell her you’re just scared. She buys it, and you remind yourself to fucking chill out. But you don’t forget that your best friend seems more interested in this stranger than you right now, and this time you can’t even convince yourself that you’re not jealous.
When you make your way back a couple hours later, you see that the exploration group has returned, and while they didn’t see anything from the top of the mountain, Shelby somehow found the pilots bag filled with enough drugs to even make your mom jealous. Dot picks out some pills to help Marty, hands them off to (of fucking course) Shelby, and your earlier regret for being so harsh about blondie evaporates about as quickly as you think you must in front of Marty with the way she focuses on the Texan with the pain meds. Its not a novel experience, being kicked to the curb for prescription medication, but you expected a little more from Marty. You can’t stand how easily Shelby is playing her, how she stumbled into a bag of meds and gets the accolades while you literally bodied Martha over a not so insignificant distance to try and help ease the ache in her foot. When Shelby drops the “how do you say” white person question, you about have an aneurysm and can actually feel your blood pressure escalating dangerously fast.
So, being the mature individual you are, you fuck off to the other side of the refugee camp before Marty can finish answering and stick your hands into the sand, feeling very much like the last kid on the playground to be picked up after school, watching as some stranger sits next to your best friend. You can’t help but feel replaced, even if it’s just a little. Can’t help but watch as someone you trust puts another thing or person in front of you. Can’t help but resent the fact that you’re a million miles away from normal, and you’re still being kicked to the curb.
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Number 9
Every Saturday night Tony took out the remaining Avengers not on mission to a restaurant of his choosing. Tonight was Italian and you had been getting suggestive looks from Bucky all day. You chose your black miniskirt and paired it with your red loose v-neck. No doubt when you went out with Stark you would party afterwards. Tony, Pepper, Sam, Steve, Bucky and you all piled into the limo and listened as Tony ‘explained’ the agenda.
“Food, Party, Don’t get too drunk. We are heroes, remember?”
“Tony, we get it. We do this every week.” Sam chimed up as he ignored Tony.
“I don’t want a repeat of last month.”
“She isn’t even here tonight so safe it say it won’t happen.” You knew he was talking about Natasha. After dinner you all had gone to a club and someone grabbed her ass. In your opinion Nat was completely right to drop him on his ass.
“No bad pictures, nothing. They already wanted us to stay in because of your record getting leaked.”
“I’ll be an Angel.” You held up a hand and winked over to Steve at the use of the nickname he called you. Bucky squeezed your thigh and you snuggled against his side as the limo drove to the best Italian place in New York. Bucky offered his hand to you as you got out of the car and the press was already lined up snapping pictures. You held your smile as you spotted the reporter from the other night and tried to ignore the rage inside of you. Bucky led you inside and you all got seated in the back booth. You were squeezed between Steve and Bucky and felt yourself almost sitting in his lap. You smiled as he whispered into your ear and Tony ordered for everyone. You shivered against his warm arm and Bucky took off his jacket to lay it over your lap to shield your legs from the cold. You all ate and joked until most of the restaurant had emptied, Bucky tucked an arm around you and pressed his lips through your hair.
“Number 9?” Bucky’s hand tightened against your upper thigh as he watched your eyes dart through everyone near. You adjusted and held your breath as Bucky moved his hand under your skirt and teased around your clit. You locked eyes with him before adjusting the jacket over your lap and tried to relax. “What’s wrong Doll?”
“You know what’s wrong.” You gritted through your teeth as Steve glanced over to you.
“Everything okay?”
“Yea, just bored out of my mind from Tony’s s-story.” You held the blush from your face as you felt Bucky move your panties to the side and slip two fingers through your folds.
“Already so wet, Doll. Doing this in public get you heated?” His whispering voice had you melting deeper against him as Bucky pressed deeper and your fingers gripped into the jacket over your lap. You held your moan in your throat as Bucky guided one of your hands over his bulge. Your eyes locked with his own while you chewed on your bottom lip, You gasped silently as his fingers slowly grazed by your climax. “Shhh.”
“Barnes, Rogers you two are on drink duty. Keep track of mainly me and {Y/N}.”
“Roger that.” You laughed at Steve’s reply and his wink sent you folding over the table. You moaned into your napkin and moved your hand against Bucky’s shaft.
“Shit.” Bucky cursed under his breath as the waiter came up to give Tony the check. He easily slipped a card into the black folder and handed it back to the man.
“I’m going to the bathroom.” You cleared your throat and easily slipped over Bucky’s lap to tease him. “Don’t leave without me boys.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” You winked at Bucky as you excused yourself and readjusted your skirt and panties. Clearing your throat you splashed some cold water over your neck before walking out to join everyone. You gripped Bucky’s hand tightly as you all left and proceeded to a bar. You smiled as the limo pulled up to the Royale Club, and you already noticed the paparazzi flashing their cameras at the limo.
“Okay everyone, smiles and waves. Get this over with then we will party till they leave.” Tony pushed open the door and led Pepper out with him. Sam stepped out and blocked you getting out of the car with the help of Steve and Bucky for no rude upskirt pictures from the paparazzi. You smiled at him as you locked arms with both men, knowing the team pictures made the recent releases look better. You smiled at each camera before you felt Steve pull off and you tucked your hand onto Bucky’s chest. You glanced over and saw Sharon yelling at Steve at the entrance. You glared at her but quickly changed your demeanor and walked over to them with Bucky.
“Sharon! So good to see you. Wanna come to a party?” You smiled as you broke your arm from Bucky and knocked her hard in the shoulder as you pushed past her. You felt her dark stare as you reached for the men’s hands and pulled them inside. “Fucking bitch.” You growled as you rushed over to Pepper who already had a plate of shots ready in the VIP area. You downed three of them and grabbed Steve. You rushed to the floor and smiled as Bucky watched you grind over his best friend. Your hands tucked around the back of his neck,as his hands went over your hips. You pouted as he pulled away and left you dancing on the floor. You wiggled your finger up to Bucky for him to join you. Wiggling your hips you felt a pair of hands on your hips and quickly turned around to rip them off of you.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?!”
“Oh come on, I read your background.”
“I’m married douchebag and if you read my file you should know who my husband is.”
“Would it work better if I said ‘Hail Hydra’?” You scoffed as you felt Bucky whip you behind him and hold the guy’s hand tightly with his metal one.
“You have three seconds to get out before I hunt you down and bury you with your buddies.” Bucky held his stare to the man as he stumbled back against the ground.
“Guess you fucked the slut out of her.” The man stood up and walked away and you couldn’t help but feel tears rushing to your face. You ran to the bathroom to calm yourself down and left Bucky out on the floor. He looked around for you and watched Steve and Sam look from the upstairs for you. Sam pointed to the bathroom and Bucky nodded as he made his way over to the archway. Bucky calmed himself down as he waited for you and groaned as Sharon walked in front of him.
“Girlfriend leave you Sweets?”
“Go away.”
“Ooo feisty. I saw that show. If I was with you, I could handle my own.”
“Don’t care.” Bucky turned his head to peek down the small hallway towards the bathroom and felt Sharon turn his head back to her attention. “Sharon go bother Steve or some other loser to sleep with you.”
“I’m just being friendly, besides I don’t see your wife around.”
“How about you turn around Bitch.” You crossed your arms and glared at her as she turned slowly to give you a sly smile.
“Well, well Looks like the ‘slut’ got her feelings together.”
“I’m counting to five, if you aren’t gone, I’m gonna have to break my promise to Stark. I would really like to keep that.”
“I’m not scared of you.”
“You really should be. Five.”
“Make me leave then.”
“I will. Four.” You started walking and pushes Sharon towards the exit slowly.
“Do something.” Sharon gave you a small shove and you just smirked as you kept backing her up.
“Three.”
“I’m not leaving.” Sharon planted her feet down as your chest lined up with her own and your breath quickened. Your eyes deepend in anger and you saw her breath leave her body.
“Two? Last chance.”
“Make me.” Sharon brought a hand across your face and you smiled wickedly at her.”
“One.” You backed her out the door and snickered to yourself as she tripped on the carpet. The cameras flashed as you fixing your posture and hovered over Sharon on the stairs. “I hope everyone is having a great night. I would like to introduce Sharon Carter. She has been kicked off and has been caught trying to steal my husband. I understand that the recent broadcast of my file has some questions which I am going to put to rest so scum like that have nothing over me. HYDRA hired me as a sex slave, they gave me the serum just so I could keep up my stamina. I am not ashamed of this and I have reprogrammed myself to use my abilities to help America. If anyone has an issue with that then they can take it up with me. I refuse to be ashamed of something that is out of my control. Sharon likes to hold that over me but not anymore. As a part of the main strike team I can fully release that Sharon has been leaking intel that is classified to the Avengers Initiative.” You gave her a small wink as her face dropped and the cameras switched onto her. You turned to shut the door, you laughed and rushed back to Bucky who spun you around in his arms.
“Tony won’t be happy about that.”
“Fuck Tony. Now how about that coupon?” You winked at him as he led you to a dark corner near the speaker. You smiled as he lifted your legs around his waist and loosened his belt enough for his pants to stretch down enough to pull out his leaking cock. You held yourself tightly against him as he pulled your soaking panties to the side and pushed deep inside of you. You tucked your face into his shoulder and let your moans flow out of your mouth to hide under the beat from the loudspeaker near you. BucKy’s fingers held you tightly against the wall and held his moans against your ear. You felt your eyes rolling back into your head and felt your finish coming quickly. Your nails dug into his skin when you felt his teeth sink against your skin.
“Fuck Bucky.”
“Gonna cum already? I feel you squeezing me, Doll.” You chewed your lip as your coil broke and you coated Bucky’s cock in your finish. He pushed himself deep inside as your walls milked him for his finish and kissed under your ear as he felt himself fill you with his own. You gasped against his body as he adjusted your clothes and carried you back up to the VIP area. You stayed curled up against him for the rest of the night as the team enjoyed the night.
SERIES MASTERLIST
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Title: Heatwave
Rating: Teen and Up
Fandom: JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Vento Aureo
Pairing(s): MeloGhia / GhiaMelo
Summary: To say that Ghiaccio hates the heat would be something of an understatement. He can’t stand it. Can’t exist in it.
Notes: I read that Ghiaccio having problems with/hating the heat is a bit of a fan favorite in terms of headcanons, and, since I am heat intolerant, I thought I'd inflict something called dysautonomia on him.
Dysautonomia basically means the autonomic nervous system (heartbeat, breathing, etc...) doesn't functioning correctly. And one type of dysautonomia is POTS, or Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome. This can cause an increase in heart rate, lowered blood pressure, orthostatic intolerance (difficulty with standing, which is usually caused by an abrupt drop of blood pressure and a significantly elevated heart rate), heat intolerance, etc...
-
To say that Ghiaccio hates the heat would be something of an understatement. He can’t stand it. Can’t exist in it. Because the heat hates him just as much. It builds under his skin, while his blood collects in all the wrong places, apparently he’s too weak against gravity for his body to continue to circulate properly.
Every attempt at moving brings about a response wherein his heart pounds away painfully in his chest. It’s an attempt, on its part, to try to correct the problem, but it’s really only making it worse. The inner chambers of his heart squeeze too hard, and the bounding of his pulse can be felt through his clothes-- not that he’s wearing much more than a tank top and a pair of boxers at this point.
He’s tried to use White Album to keep the worst of it at bay, but he’s running out of energy. Partly because this particular wave of too-hot days has stretched on for nearly a week, and partly because his body is exhausting itself in its effort to recapture homeostasis.
Nausea bubbles up on his guts for the umpteenth time; a sure sign that all the blood in his body is being shunted away from anything deemed non-vital. He hasn’t eaten much of anything in days simply to avoid the repercussions of an underactive digestive system, and that certainly isn’t helping.
He knows he isn’t drinking enough water, either. Knows that it’s vital for someone like him, but he can’t bring himself to care when he’s splayed out on the cold floor of his bedroom with limbs spread in every direction. Every time the floor warms, he simply scoots to a new spot or rolls himself over until it becomes necessary to repeat the process all over again.
Being on the floor has the added bonus of reducing the amount of energy that goes into his body fighting gravity. If he were to try to stand right now, the dizziness would hit him so severely that he might not be able to catch himself before blacking out. All of his blood would rush down into his legs, and his brain would momentarily blip out on him. The last thing he needs is a concussion.
He’s too caught in his own thoughts to notice someone popping the door open (it should be locked anyways, but when has that ever stopped anyone in this godforsaken house?)
“Ah,” Melone says when he looks into the room and sets his eyes on Ghiaccio. He makes his way over to the sprawled man and peers down at him through a curtain of lavender hair, “Body being a bitch today?”
“You’re being a bitch today,” Ghiaccio snaps back, but there’s no heat to it.
“Aw,” Melone juts out his lower lip, “Now is that any way to talk to the one that brought you presents?”
“I don’t give a fuck, Mel, go away,” the nickname is the only thing that betrays his attempt at sound pissed. He isn’t really. Not at Melone, but he’s miserable and sick to his stomach and overheated and kind of over the whole living thing.
Melone pretends to consider the request-- it’s not one-- before grinning, “No. Don’t think so. Up with you! Wait, no. Don’t move.” He disappears out the door, though only just outside of it. He comes back a few seconds later with a massive duffel bag that only makes Ghiaccio groan. He has no idea what Melone is up to, but he can tell when Melone’s scheming, and that doesn’t always bode well for Ghiaccio.
Without asking, Melone settles down next to Ghiaccio on the floor, right in his next cold spot, and that gets Melone a glare that he, of course, ignores. “Relax, the internet said this’ll help.”
“The internet says all kinds of bullshit,” Ghiaccio mumbles with a roll of his eyes, but there’s no stopping Melone now.
At least not until he pulls a needle, and Ghiaccio suddenly finds the energy (adrenaline) to quickly sit up in an attempt to escape. His vision rapidly fades out, and it’s only Melone’s hands that stop him from hitting the ground.
“Have a little faith, Ghia!” Melone whines, but he’s still grinning.
Bastard.
“Whatever,” now Ghiaccio is losing patience with the man.
“The science is sound! You’re low on blood volume, and I’ve got a pretty easy fix for that. Plus some ice packs,” Melone resumes digging into the bag and pulls out several, soft freezer packs. Ghiaccio takes them with a little more eagerness than he means to let on, but Melone only smiles in response. A softer, more genuine thing that makes Ghiaccio’s heart flutter for an entirely different reason.
“How are you going to ‘fix’ my blood volume?”
“You’ll see,” Melone answers, earning himself a roll of the eyes from Ghiaccio.
It takes Melone awhile to set up whatever he’s doing, and Ghiaccio gives up figuring it out only a few minutes in. He’s gathered that it has to do with some sort of injection. Possibly more than one, given the tourniquet, but he doesn’t know enough about medical supplies to put any of the other pieces together. Instead, he closes his eyes and tries to focus on the feeling of the freezing sensation against his skin from where he’s stuck the packs against his stomach and legs. It’s both a relief and a comfort. Cold is an old, reliable friend and his only solace in times like these.
Eventually, Melone breaks him out of his daze to ask, “Ready?”
Melone wraps the tourniquet around Ghiaccio’s upper arm as he speaks, and Ghiaccio simply shrugs with his other shoulder. He doesn’t think he actually has much say in this. When Melone sets his mind to something, he’s going to follow it through, and that goes double for medical experiments. It’s not the first time Ghiaccio is on the receiving end, and he has to admit that it hasn’t ever gone too horribly for him in the past.
“Okay,” Melone grabs the needle again. He pops the cap off and holds it up to his good eye for a moment before he lowers it toward Ghiaccio’s elbow. “On three. One, two-”
“OW! Fuck you!”
“Three,” Melone smiles at him with a feigned sweetness, like he doesn’t know why Ghiaccio might want to pull the needle right back out of his arm and stick it between Melone’s eyes.
Melone doesn’t pay him the slightest bit of attention as he slides the needle out and leaves behind a small catheter. He screws something into the end of it and slaps tape over it. It’s then that Ghiaccio notices the bag of fluids already hung up on the nearest surface, which just happens to be his dresser.
“There,” Melone says when he finishes setting up everything to his liking, “That should do it.” He taps the bag with his pointer finger, “Saline. An easy and safe way to up your volume.”
Ghiaccio doesn’t particularly like the implication that there’s an unsafe way.
“Well, mostly. Technically this isn’t the most sterile environment, so you could get an infection, but I’ve done worse on the kitchen table on Pesci’s day to do dishes, sooo.” And there it is.
“Please stop talking,” Ghiaccio says with a groan and tries to push away the anxiety that’s building at the mere thought of sepsis.
“Aww, have a little faith. You’ll be fine, and this should make you feel a lot better. For at least a day or two, and maybe the heatwave will finally go away,” Melone beams at him before he starts to clean up his mess. He gathers it all up in a trash bag he must have brought with him, though that doesn’t exactly answer why the duffel bag is so large.
“What else do you have in there?” Ghiaccio asks against his better judgement. He still isn’t so sure about this saline thing, but his curiosity has always been a bit of a problem.
“Oh, more fluids, in case you need them, and some uh- well, let’s just say a snack for our resident pseudo-vampire. It has to stay cold until it’s… used, so I’ve got it in a cooler.”
Ghiaccio hums and as he processes the words. Seems he isn’t the only one suffering through the heat, though he has a feeling Risotto’s situation is more of a repercussion from his most recent hit. Then again, maybe the heat is getting to the man. It’s not often that Risotto’s left in a bad enough state where he needs Melone’s help. He usually has Prosciutto for that.
“I’m going to go take care of that, actually. You should be fine here for a bit. That bag will finish in about forty-five minutes, so just stay put,” Melone says like Ghiaccio has any intention of going anywhere, regardless of the ice and saline. He stands with the bag slung over his shoulder and glances between the door and Ghiaccio, obviously not wanting to leave, but knowing that he’s needed elsewhere.
“Go take care of Ris,” Ghiaccio mumbles in lieu of a thanks. He’ll repay Melone for his efforts later. When he’s feeling more human.
“Yes, sir!”
Ghiaccio groans and rolls his eyes, “Get the fuck out.”
Melone laughs and dashes for the door before Ghiaccio can hurtle a pointed chunk of ice directly at his head.
It’s barely twenty minutes-- and only half a bag later-- when Ghiaccio finds himself able to sit up without the world spinning.
“Huh,” is all he can say into the empty room. Leave it to Melone.
#meloghia#ghiamelo#ghiaccio#melone#jjba#jojo's bizarre adventure#vento aureo#golden wind#blitzwrites#blitz
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TRC rewrite: Never to be finished scene
Part 3 of my K analyses is slowly eating me out, not in the “Oh, I can’t deal with this~“ but more writing block. While looking through material, I found this scene to the rewrite stuff I was doing. Like “You’ll be fine“, this was a removed scene I was writing for fun. It’s noting big but it plays with character dynamics.
Context: It’s somewhat beginning of TDT and the gang (minus Blue) is trying to figure-out something about the Cabeswater problem, until someone is mentioned.
Ronan loved the idea of summer vacations. To stay all night and watch the stars, to races until the engine over heats, to live, to burn, to finally be. Not school to bug him, no Declan to nag him. Just him and his dreams.
But the last thing he wanted, was to stay late into the night and think about the Cabeswater problem.
They sat around their crooked table, covered in the chaotic mess of Gansey's research and plans. Crinkled maps and strings tied and knotted into a web of secrets yet to uncover, crumbling books and tapes holding up their whole world. Gansey's world. Everything was connected and yet, nothing was.
Lighted only by the few small lamps they had moved from their rooms, the only non-artificial glow in the Manufacturing, they seem almost ancient but real. Too real for Ronan’s taste.
Above the scratched wooden surface, Gansey in his old-man's pajamas, tried to draw on the map of Henrietta a straight line for the fourth time. One and erase, two and erase. His fingers banged on the table between each try, just to do something productive.
Ronan's eyes followed the previous attempts, now faint on pale colors from erasing, trying to understand Gansey's thinking. He slouched down in his chair, burying his head and arms inside his oversized sleep-hoodie. He looked up at Gansey, tired and barely standing from lack of sleep.
One more attempt. A smile spread on his friend's face.
- Here. - he finally said, he's voice almost a whisper.
They could talk louder but didn't. Any louder and Gansey's splitting headache would return.
- If my calculations are right-
- They probably aren't. - Ronan cut in, leaning back in his chair. He felt Chainsaw moving in his hood.
- The main line goes through here. - he continued like he didn't hear anything. - So we need more.
- More what?
- Power.
Ronan rolled his eyes.
- It has power. - he grunted. - It flows like it should.
- But the forest is in half. Literal half. Not enough to be whole.
- And how you want to get more from already awaken line?
- By fixing it. Fixing the flow.
- How?
Gansey blinked. He looked around for something and finally found Adam walking through the room with a mug.
- Adam?
- Call Blue. - he walked pass them.
- Adam.
He stopped and sighed.
He put down his mug on a cupboard, their drinking station, and when back to them.
It was Saturday night, the eve of Adam Parrish's freedom day. Still in his dirty jumpsuit, half-open and tied around his waist, and his wash-out red shirt, there was the rare relaxation in his posture. Tomorrow, he'll sit in his room and finish one of his borrowed books, or disappear in the morning and return for dinner.
But it was still today.
He pulled himself a chair and sat down. Crossing his arms on his chest, he tilted his head back, closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
No one made any sound, only the distend clock made its quiet ticks.
His body was motionless, frozen in place, with only his chest rising and falling.
Ronan could feel the unease in the air, he moved his eyes from Adam to Gansey.
Dick watched Adam carefully, rolling pencil in his hands, he was as worried as Ronan. Neither of them liked the idea of Adam and Cabeswater being connected in anyway. They didn't know what the forest was and how Glendower fit into it, but it was the only chance they had to find him.
Ronan glanced back at Adam, feeling anxiety building up inside him, slowly over flowing. He breath in, weeks old dust and used books, blooming mint plants and dried coffee stains. All familiar, all safe. But under it, leaking into the room, was something making his heartbeat dangerously pick up. The smell of fresh moss, evergreens and oaks, mushrooms hidden under mulch. The living and the decaying.
He felt Chainsaw climbed up and cuddling into his neck. He gently stroked her beak, shushing her and himself.
Suddenly, Adam's face twisted. Violently straight up in his sit, he opened his eyes and covered his left ear.
- Okay, okay. - he massaged his deaf ear. - That's enough. Thank you. Thank you. I'll tell them. Thank you, now hush.
Chainsaw cawed, moving even closer to Ronan's neck. He covered her with his hand. "Shh" he told her.
- Adam? - Gansey asked, reaching out to him.
Adam raised his hand. He stood up, he's legs were shaking, and went to the cupboard.
- It's the flow problem mostly, not enough energy to fully manifest. - he turned on the electric kettle. - Correcting it should partly do the trick.
- But how to fix it?
- We already know this, Parrish. - Ronan rolled his eyes. - Thanks for being late to the party.
- I'm only repeating what it, wants to say, I think. - he stressed, massaging his ear again. - Christ, - he muttered. - Nine years of normal life, and now it's full of sleeping welsh men, magic lines and "Dude, my friend is a ghost!". No offence, Noah. - he said to the air.
Noah wasn't there, or he wasn't visible, or he was wondering around Henrietta. It was never sure with him, the only certain thing was: He was here.
- And - Adam continued. He pour some coffee and sugar in the mug. - I'm now a secretary of a talking forest.
- Only nine? - Ronan grinned.
- You know, - he scratched his cheek, sounding like he didn’t wanted to answer him. - I once believed in Easter Bunny.
- Of all things, - he chuckled. - Easter Bunny?
- Don't. - he pointed a spoon at him. - Don't tell me you dreamed the Easter Bunny.
- Jeez, Parrish, I don't waste my sleep on kid stuff.
- Yes, Easter Bunny, - Gansey bugged in. - But did you caught how to fix the line?
- Gansey, - Adam said in a tone only a parent would. - Maybe I'll get you on the line with Mr. Waters to talk it over some tea and try to decipher a hive of voices and rustling, I barely understand, yourself?
- So, no?
- No clue.
The kettle clicked.
Adam pour it into his mug and stir. Without thinking, he stuck his two fingers into a pot of one of the mint plants.
He sighed.
- Gansey, did you water the mints like I asked you?
He paused. Hovering over the maps, he thought for a long bit, just to answer:
- When was it?
Adam shook his head and grabbed a bottle of water.
- Dicky, - Ronan pretended to be offended. - Not even Richard Mentha Gansey IV? How can you treat your son like that?
- Ronan.
- At least, Sargent Pepper is getting better. - announced Adam. He rubbed a leaf between his finger. - No more sugar for you. - he whispered to it.
- So, - Ronan turned to Gansey. - Back to square one?
- No, no, we're not. - he protested, grabbing his journal and flipping pages rapidly. - There are still leads we didn't check, like if the type of shells mean anything or the lake-
- For fucks sake, Dick, - he grunted. - We have time-
- No, we don't. In few days, I'm off to my parent with Adam and you with Blue have your problems. Tomorrow we-
- You, Dick, you. - he corrected him. - I'm going to church and to a family dinner. Blue has her family time. Adam-
- I'm busy. - Adam admitted.
- Adam has "me time". Maybe ask Noah but I'm doubting he wants to spend his time with you in a library. Chill, Glendower is not going anywhere.
Gansey looked him in the eyes, something inside him crashed and couldn't recover. Ronan knew, Glendower was his life work, to find him, to see the magic and mystery. Ever since they knew each other, he never cared about the wish, he wanted to know, why he survived.
He sat down and laid his head on his arms, sighing. Tired and defeated. His King was crumbling before his eyes.
Maybe... he could just dream him a new one?
- There is something else. - Adam interrupted them. - But I don't understand it.
- What? - Gansey asked, looking up and grinning like a idiot.
- Cabeswater was repeating something. - he continued. - But I don’t... It sounded something like... Ag draenáil?
- Ag what?
- Draining. - said Ronan. They both looked at him. - It's Irish.
- And "se" or "ef".
- HE. - Ronan and Gansey shot at once.
- So, somebody is draining the power.
Adam and Gansey looked at Ronan. Chainsaw cawed, backing up in the hood.
- I don't know. - he moved his head to the sides. - Maybe. Who knows? It would make some sense, I'm sure it isn't coming from nowhere, but even if, I haven't dream anything in few days.
- Ronan. - Adam's voice was flat but yet demanding.
- I swear.
- Lynch.
- The last thing I dreamed was a made up Blink-182 album for Noah.
- You never listen to them. - Gansey reminded him. - How did it turn out?
- Well, it was a weird mash-up of Twenty One Pilots and Maroon 5.
- Dear Lord. - he groan.
- It wasn't that bad.
- That's all? - Adam pushed.
- Mostly yes.
He didn't want to talk about the nightmares, nor the car keys, or the dead bugs and papers. Patches of asphalt between moss and the feeling of burning. Of wanting to burn...
- So, it's not you. Mostly.
Gansey slapped his hands on the table. He and Adam flinched.
- He. - he pointed at a box, standing next to the front door.
Ronan swallowed. The box was full of fake IDs, leather bracelets and campaign badges announcing "They can't lick our Dick" and "We like Dick". Perfect forgeries. They weren't for him, well not in that sense, it was a warning for Gansey. Or rather a reminder, that he only understood a fraction of him and dreaming.
- Kavinsky? - Ronan asked like he didn't know.
- And who else? He surely knows his stupid parties are effecting my- our quest. - he corrected himself. - He's doing everything to spite me.
- He likes your reactions. - he tried not to smile.
- He is a... - he bite his tongue. - Arrogant, doofus, thinking he's the King of Henrietta, like life is just a music video. The next thing I know, he'll be selling his stupid drugs to the police officers-
- Gansey, - Adam scolded him flatly. Not even turning to face them, he continued. - Stop talking about Joseph, like he's the devil incarnated. The worst he does, is his parties. All he talks about is cars and races, races and cars, cocktails and surprisingly, classical literature. - he paused. - But anyways, he's not interested in Glendower, I would even argue, he doesn't even know who Owain Glyndŵr is.
Both Ronan and Gansey stayed silent, as their friend drank his coffee.
- You know Kavinsky? - Ronan shot. Something wasn't right. - Know him?
Adam turned to them, slowly sipping his drink. He looked tired, it wasn't something new but Ronan could swear there was something else in his gaze.
- Yes.
- You're joking, - Gansey chuckled but smile quickly disappeared. - Right?
- How? - Ronan couldn't comprehend it. - Didn't saw you and him be buddy-buddy at school-
- Nor you. - Adam rolled his eyes.
- Or you're not saying something, Parrish.
- Ronan. - Gansey warned him.
Their eyes meet, blue and grey. The boiling water and the rain-clouds. Ronan didn't know why he was getting angry, there was nothing to get angry about. He felt Chainsaw pulling on his collar, trying to distracted him.
- If you’re so... curious, he always comes to the garage at the end of my shift. - he was calm. - His Mitsubishi beat up or missing some parts. Or just wanting to talk. - he shrugged, tacking a sip. - Quite an asshole. I get why you like him.
- I don't!
- Ronan. - Gansey whimpered, covering his head with his hands. - Please, don't yell.
- Anyways, - Adam continued, unbothered. - He's fine. What, Lynch? Surprised, I know people?
He couldn't articulate his thought, they were racing each other.
A blur.
- Not him. Anyone, but him. He's dangerous and fucking reckless, Parrish, what if he gets you in trouble at school? You can already wave your scholarship bye-bye. Or shit, with police? You'll be weight-off all your jobs, have to sell Noah's Mustang to pay off everything and than get kick out of Aglionby. You can't be friends with him!
Adam flinched a bit but remained calm. He raised an eyebrow, glaring at him.
- What a hypocrite. - he slammed the mug down. Gansey groaned even louder. - Listen, Lynch. Let me decide, who I'm friends with. I know, what I'm doing, I know the risk.
- But-
- But what? - he cut in. - Pissed that Joseph isn't just yours little secret?
Ronan didn't response. Squeezing the table's edge, his knuckles when pale, he could barely sit in place. Chainsaw buried herself into his neck, cawing softly she was doing her best to keep him calm.
He hated that Adam's face didn't change, they could as well be talking about the weather with his melancholic expression. Understand, understand, he didn't understand a thing.
- You won't answer me? - Adam asked, tilting his head. - Fine. - he shrugged, crossing his arms. - As you wish. Don't worry, I won't replace you.
- Oh, I don't fucking care! - he exploited, storming out of his sit. He stopped in front of Adam. - It isn't about me! I don't want him near you!
Adam flinched at his outburst. Angered flashed on his face.
- Is that so? - his voice was shaky, but he kept going. - Or do you don't want me near him?
- Either way is fine!
- Why does it matter?
- Because your life matters!
Silence.
They all looked at each other, the unspoken words hanging between them.
Adam opened his mouth but quickly closed it, his eyes glossy. He sighed.
- You also matter.
They all jumped.
Noah appeared on the counter next to Adam, his face serious.
- And he. - he added, looking straight at Ronan. - Don't ever say otherwise.
Before Ronan could say anything, Adam grabbed his mug and ran to his room, slamming the door behind him.
Silence.
Ronan cursed Niall in his mind. He and Gansey traded helpless stares.
Gansey rapidly stood up and announced:
- I'm gonna talk with him.
- Gansey. - Noah wanted to say more, but Gansey cut in, already halfway up the stairs.
- I'm gonna talk with him.
- Fine, but after that, go to sleep. - seeing Gansey wanting to say something, he added. - You had only four hours. - again. - I counted, with naps.
He just nodded and tripped over last steps.
When they heard him entering Adam's room, Noah turned to Ronan.
- Ronan, - he started.
- What?!
He shook his head, slipping down with a strangely fluent motion. Ronan often forgot he was a ghost and even more that he was older than them. Now, it was almost like the time caught up to him, he looked and moved more mature, reminding him of his brother. He grabbed his arm, cold fingers biting him even through the sleeve, and sat him in a chair. He moved one for himself and sat in front of him.
- I know what's going on. - he said.
- You know shit.
- Really? - he snickered. - Ronan, I'm always here, I see and hear everything. I'm trying, trying not to be nosy, to let you guys live your lives as you wish. But, you hormonal dumb-asses. Just wow. Between Gansey's embracing handling of his crush on Blue and your "friendship" with Kavinsky...
Chainsaw picked up and flew through him. Cawing, she made few circles around the room, before she returned to Ronan, sitting on his lap. She puffed up her feathers.
- Tawsheh. - she cawed. - Olk.
"Taibhse olc" Ronan corrected her in his mind.
- Níl taibhse olc. - he scolded her. - Dona. Tá Noah cara.
She made a sad caw. Ronan patted her but still angry, at her and himself.
Noah looked faded, a mist in the air. Broken bones and blooded sweater and messy hair. His expression didn’t exist, like he didn’t exist.
Ronan scolded himself for thinking that. Noah was here. Czerny was real.
He went back to normal. Same kind and tired face.
- Adam's right. - he said.
- About what?
- But you're also right. - he finished. - Both of you just can't see the other side. Don't you think, him and Adam can be friends without, - he moved his hands close to his head and made "boom" motion.
He didn't answered, patting Chainsaw's back, he knew it wasn't all.
- I don't want Kavinsky to harm him. - he finally said.
- Do you believe he can?
- No, - he felt offended. - Adam wouldn't fucking let him.
Noah nodded.
- But still, what's the problem?
He didn't say anything.
- Because you like Kavinsky. - it sounded like a question but wasn't.
- Because Joe understands. - he stood up, putting Chainsaw on the chair. He started wandering around the room, with the little raven hopping after him. - He gets the dreaming. He gets how I feel. He knows me.
Kavinsky knew him.
Not Niall, but Ronan.
- Didn't you think he might "get" Adam?
He didn't.
- Like what?
He knew the answer.
He looked back at Noah, he wasn't in the chair.
- Go talk with him.
He was on the stairs, faded and smudged.
- Noah?
- I... just need time. - he sounded like echo. - Don't worry.
A shadow of a smile appeared on his blurry face.
***
- ... but it sucks, because it's gone and even museums started hunting them for display. Museums, Adam! Museums!
They were sitting on a bed. Gansey was leaning on Adam, head resting on the boy's shoulder, eyes fighting to stay open. Adam wrapped his arm around his sleepy friend, nodding to every word he said, his own eyes puffy and reddish.
Ronan looked at them, feeling something he didn't in long time. He felt at home.
- What's he mumbling about? - he asked, leaning on the door-frame.
- The Great Auk. - Adam answered, not looking at him.
- They're gone, Ronan. - Gansey yawned. - Gone, the great bird of Scottish islands, of Kilda and Elday. No, - he murmured to himself. - Elday is Iceland's. - he frowned his eyebrows trying to remember something, suddenly he announced: - Pen gwyn.
- Falcóg mhór. - Ronan nodded. - "He made no cry. I strangled him.", a cruel end.
- Ronan. - Adam scolded him.
- This is what one of them said. - he shrugged. - Cruel fate with no future. Gansey, go to sleep. I wanted to talk with Adam.
Gansey rubber his eyes.
- Sure, sure. But first, I said, Great Auk is the original penguin and-
- You're going with me to church tomorrow. - he interrupted him. - After dinner, we gonna check whatever you want.
He looked at him, like he just show him a new thing from his dream.
- I'm not...
- Matthew likes you.
- No connection. - he insisted. - And Declan...
- He doesn’t own the church. You’ll just pretend you for a hour or so.
- I did. - Noah said, his voice hanging behind him. - My mother hated when I did.
Ronan turned his head and saw him in the same state. He moved through him and grabbed Gansey’s hand.
- Come on, - he made him stand up. - They need to talk.
- I never was...
- Gansey, - he pulled him in to the hall. - Tell me more about the gwin.
Ronan closed the door and looked at Adam. Heat rising inside him.
- I'm still standing what I said.
- That makes two of us. - he didn’t look at him.
And that’s it.
If someone interested, just ask.
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