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shitpostsfromtheinvisiblelibrary · 11 months

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‘Welcome to Corvid house,’ Vale said, stepping out of the doorway and ushering Irene and Kai inside. ‘You will have to forgive how dark it is, it has always been like this, a trick of the architecture I believe.’

It was gloomy inside, even if it wasn't for the trick of the architecture, as Vale called it, there were heavy curtains drawn across all of the windows, the floors were dark wood and the wallpaper was dark too.

‘Thank you for coming,’ He sighed and slumped his shoulders. ‘Plenty of things for me to be doing and yet nothing that can keep my attention for more than a moment or two.’

Irene set her small case down as the door was shut behind them. ‘What do you need our help with?’ She asked, looking around, not that there was much that she could see in the gloom. ‘Is something wrong?’

‘Or did you just miss our company?’ Kai’s smile was cheeky and toothy and he managed to draw something of a smile from Vale in return. ‘Wait. Really?’

‘I have been putting off my responsibilities here for too long and there is a lot of work that I need to be doing, however,’ He spoke with a pained slowness that made it obvious that he did not want to be confessing this. ‘Doing it without anyone as company when I do take a break is particularly unpleasant. I hope that I am not taking you both from anything important?’

‘You’re here alone?’ Kai said. ‘Your siblings and mother?’

‘Columbine has her work, I do not care to keep up with whatever Aquila is currently up to and my mother simply cannot stand to be in the same house as me for longer than an hour,’ He shrugged. ‘I don’t take it personally any more.’

‘Well,’ Irene said. ‘We will unpack and then we are going for a short walk, you look pale and definitely need some fresh air,’ His something of a smile was back, a little brighter this time. She stepped forward to kiss his cheek. ‘And you are going to have to show me the family Library, assuming that there is one?’

There was, in fact, Vale’s bedroom was the one closest to it.

‘We don’t all have to share,’ Vale said. ‘There is plenty of space for the three of us in here but you can have your own space.’

‘It is cosy,’ Kai said. ‘Perfect,’ He put pulled his jacket off and draped it over the edge of the bed. ‘Unless you would rather we take another room.’

‘No,’ He touched Irene’s arm as she pulled back heavy curtains to peer out and see what kind of view Vale had. Another reason for the dark, the curtains were made out of a thick heavy silk brocade, some ten years out of date in terms of interior decorating, smothering any sound of light that could make it inside.

‘I’ll show you the gardens,’ He said. ‘I don’t think anyone has bothered with the curtains for years, I don’t think choking on the dust would be a good way to spend the day.’

It was a surprisingly sunny day for early spring but it was still cold enough that they all wrapped themselves up again to step outside. There was a path leading down the centre of the garden lined with cherry blossom trees, the flowers wouldn't last long but the few weeks that they were there would fill the garden with the scent and turn the grass pink with shed petals.

He led them over a rough stone path. The house was on top of a hill and a decent way away from any actual city, town or village. By horse and carriage, it was a two-hour long, very uncomfortable ride from Leeds Aeroport.

They leant over a stone wall and looked out across the Yorkshire Dales, the wind whistled around them and rustled through the trees and grass. Kai turned away, sneezing several times as they breathed in the smell of flowers and grass, proving too much for his sensitive nose.

Vale had to be up early the next day, taking a pot of strong coffee and a plate of toast, at Kai’s insistence, into the study and locking the door. Irene and Kai shared a look before rolling their sleeves up and pinning back their hair.

‘The curtains?’ She asked as Kai started to look through the storerooms just off the kitchen.

‘There should have been servants stopping it from ever getting to this state,’ He muttered.

‘You know Vale,’ Irene said. ‘He probably forgot that he would have to come back here, or assumed he could just keep putting the work off.’

‘Either way. He has been here for two weeks, breathing in all of that dust, it can’t be good for him. Now, can you tackle the Library without getting distracted or do you want to take on the bedroom?’

Irene almost pouted. ‘The bedroom,’ She said finally. They’d left her to her own devices in the library the night before, Kai and Vale retreating for a game of cards, splitting most of a bottle of brandy that Vale had retrieved from a dusty wine cellar, bringing Irene up a glass to sip on as she perused the books.

She had found many books that she was itching to get back to and was never one for resisting temptation.

‘You are going to want to wrap a handkerchief around your mouth,’ Irene said, pulling out her own handkerchief. ‘So you don’t choke. Should we be doing this with your allergies?’

‘It isn't like we can go and hire a couple of people to deal with it for us,’ Kai shrugged. ‘I will be fine.

By the time it was noon (Irene was unhappy that Kai had suggested that they all get up and have breakfast together) Irene was aching and covered in more dust than she thought could have been held in curtains. She was pulling fluff clumps of dust out of her hair and flicking it away as Vale came in, blotting ink off his cuff.

‘What… are you doing?’ He asked, stopping in the doorway.

‘Cleaning,’ Irene said, she had succeeded in beating the dust off both of the curtains and pulling them open to bring bright sunlight into the room. ‘When was the last time you had someone in here?’

‘I don’t think I have ever arranged for someone to clean.’

‘Your mother?’ He shrugged.

‘I believe she just arranged for her own space to be cleaned as well as the areas that she uses, the dining room, sitting room and drawing room seem fine, and I haven't checked her bedroom’ He brushed some dust off her hair and smoothed some errant strands behind her ear.

‘You didn’t have to do this,’ She pulled the handkerchief around her mouth down to her neck.

‘Kai has pointed out that breathing in all of the dust is bad for your health,’ She said. ‘He’s been working on the library, we are doing the study next, whether you like it or not.’

‘Why?’ He spread his hands and Irene could see that he’d probably spilt the ink bottle onto his hand.

‘Because,’ Kai said, Irene hadn’t heard him approach but Vale clearly had as he hadn't jumped, merely turned to regard him and step into the room and out of the way of the door. ‘We want to do something to help you.’

‘Kai wanted to help you, I wanted to read,’ Irene said. ‘Luckily, he is very persuasive,’ Kai put a hand on Vale’s back and brushed a kiss to his temple.

‘We couldn’t leave you to deal with it for however long you are stuck out here,’ Kai said. ‘Besides, we spend a day or two cleaning what we can and then the rest of our time here distracting you from your work with various elaborate methods.’

‘You will both be found with your noses in books and no knowledge of what year it is.’

‘That too,’ Kai smiled. ‘Are you taking a break?’

‘I just needed to change my shirt,’ Vale said, raising his hand so that Kai could see the damage. ‘I have had a casualty during budgeting. I should have asked Columbine to look at it, she is much better with that kind of stuff than I am. It is boring.’

He stripped off his jacket and shirt, Irene and Kai sitting on the edge of the bed, or at least, Irene was sitting, Kai flopped backwards with a sigh. He stretched out and yawned.

‘The country air really just takes it out of you,’ He said. Irene reached down and began playing with his hair, idly curling strands of pure ebony around her fingers before pulling them free and winding them back in again. Kai’s eyes half shut and the corners of his lips curled into a smile.

He very nearly started purring as he tilted his head back to press his head into Irene’s hand like a particularly needy cat, not that he would say that connection out loud, but Vale probably would have done.

‘It is a lot easier on you than the London air,’ Vale admitted as he tossed his shirt into the laundry hamper and started to pull on a new one. Both Irene and Kai turned to watch him, rewarded with a brief glimpse of taut muscle seamed with scar tissue much in the same way that they were.

Irene pushed herself off the bed and took Vale’s wrist in hand to do his cufflinks for him, stroking her fingers across his skin before doing them up.

It wasn't common that Vale’s smiles were pure, genuine happiness, but when it did happen, Irene swore it was one of the best things that she had seen.

‘Thank you for coming here,’ He said, not meeting her eyes. ‘I needed the company,’ Irene touched his cheek, like Kai, he tilted his head to press into her touch. ‘Love…’ His voice was low and soft.

He was so tired.

‘You should get some rest,’ Irene said. ‘If Kai is tired as well, I’ll go and make some lunch for us all.’

‘I’m fine.’

‘You are a terrible liar,’ She dropped her hand. ‘Just a quick rest, for me.’

‘Emotional manipulation? Really, Winters?’ She pushed him towards the bed.

‘Really.’

Irene's hands were black with soot as she cleaned out the grate in the sitting room, it looked like it hadn't been cleaned out after it was last used. She cleaned off her hands as best as she could on a rag that was streaked with ash.

The good weather had taken a turn and Vale was certain that the thick grey clouds were going to bring heavy rain and a few days of it at least. Kai was happy with that news and was currently out in the gardens, breathing in the smell of petrichor.

She and Vale were less than keen on the heavy weather as it would keep them inside.

She added newspaper to the bottom of the fireplace, there was a stack of it already put to one side for this use, before going outside to collect wood from the small shed at the side of the building, making several trips to retrieve enough so that if the weather was nastier than anticipated, no one would be having to run out and hope that the wood doesn’t get too wet.

She didn’t light the fire, she just lay it ready for later on when they would want the warmth.

The front door opened and, wiping her hands on her dress, Irene peered around the kitchen door and into the dark hallway, expecting to see Kai shaking the rain out of his hair and kicking off muddy boots but was instead met with the sight of a woman a few inches shorter than her with steel grey hair and a thick fur coat of some years old.

The woman’s eyes were sharp and cold though she supposed that they could be the same hazel as Vale’s if perhaps they contained any warmth, there was no doubting who this woman was.

‘What are you doing in my home?’ She demanded in a voice cold as those eyes, sharp and with obvious disdain as Irene somewhat reluctantly stepped into full view.

‘I am here upon the invitation of your son,’ Irene said. ‘Assuming that you are who I think you are Lady Vale?’ Vale had never given a first name for his mother, nor much in the way of description. They had never asked.

‘A likely story,’ She sniffed. ‘And where is my son?’

‘He is working, ma’am,’ Irene said. ‘Would you like a cup of tea?’ She wasn't sure if Vale would be very happy about her inviting his mother into the house but she didn’t want her storming off and interrupting Vale.

She sniffed and after a long and hard look at Irene, she headed upstairs.

‘Really, ma’am, he doesn’t want to be distracted,’ Irene said, following her up. ‘He’ll be wanting a break soon anyway, I’m sure we won't have to wait for long,’ Lady Vale continued to ignore Irene and threw the study door open before Irene could stop her.

Vale shot up out of his deckchair, an uncomfortable thing of brown leather and dark wood.

‘Mother what are you-’ He swallowed. ‘How may I help you today?’

‘You’ve taken to keeping your mistress here?’ She gestured to Irene. ‘Well, I suppose that I should be proud that you finally found a woman who wants to stay around.’

‘Excuse me?’ Irene snapped.

‘Mother, if you are not going to be polite to my friend then I think that you should leave,’ Irene wasn't sure which hurt more, being assumed to be a mistress, or being just Vale’s friend. She knew why he said that, their relationship would be heavily scrutinised if people knew. But still.

‘Well, you have a woman kept in the house with just the two of you,’ She sneered at Irene. ‘What should I expect?’

‘She is visiting me with her husband,’ Vale said. ‘I believe he has stepped out for a walk, Mrs Strongrock?’

‘He left about half an hour ago,’ Irene said. ‘He shouldn’t be much longer.’

He turned back to his mother. ‘I advise you to keep a civil tongue about my guests in my house, especially if you want to keep access to it.’

‘Well,’ She sniffed. ‘I see I failed to raise you with proper respect for your own family.’

‘I do respect my family,’ Vale said. ‘My family, the ones that I chose. Now, if you will excuse me, I have some work to be getting on with. Stay away from my friends whilst you are here. And shut the door on your way out.’

She slammed the door, making both Irene and Vale wince.

‘Are you alright?’

‘Shouldn't I be asking you that?’ Irene perched on the edge of the desk and took his hands in hers, squeezing lightly. ‘I did try to get her to stay downstairs.’

‘I didn’t think she would come here knowing that I was-’ He smiled and smeared away ash from her cheek.

‘She probably assumed that I was the help,’ Irene said. ‘I think I would rather that than a mistress.’

‘I am sorry about that,’ He sighed. ‘And saying that you were just a friend, you are much more than that. So much more.’

‘I know,’ Irene said. ‘She can’t know what is really going on, if she would even understand it, I’ll try and move mine and Kai’s things into one of the other bedrooms.’

‘Hopefully, she will go away soon,’ He said. ‘When she figures out that she isn't going to get the results that she wants.’

‘I will go and find Kai and let him know that we are married now,’ Irene smiled. ‘Not how I saw myself getting married but here we are,’ He shook his head before kissing her on the temple and pushing her off the edge of the desk.

Vale lay in bed staring up at the ceiling unable to sleep. The bed was too big and empty, he hadn't enjoyed sleeping without Irene and Kai before they had arrived. It was torture knowing that they were probably sleeping easily in the next room.

The work wasn’t taking as long as he thought it would, it was fairly easy once he managed to focus on it, the focussing was the hardest part and took the longest. It didn’t take much energy to get through and now he was still wide awake.

He couldn’t even go out and get some fresh air as the rain had well and truly started and he wasn't stupid enough to try and withstand the squall that had started whilst Kai had cooked them dinner.

He was left to either lay in bed or get up and wander the house and with his mother around, option one was the far more preferable option. The rain outside lashed against the windows, shaking the glass in their wooden frames and loudly rattling them.

Kai found it a comfort and when they were together, the nasty parts, the soaking wet clothes, the chill, etc., were all well worth it just to see how happy it made him when soaked through. He’d watched Kai run out into a storm before dragging him out into it as well, they had shared a kiss hidden amongst the heavy branches of an oak tree that sheltered them from prying eyes but let enough rain through the leaves to still shower down on them.

With Irene, the rain was perfect for working inside in quiet companionship, side by side with their own things, fleeting touches and the brush of her hand on his as they reached for the same piece of paper, shared cups of tea as they watched rain run down the windows, comfortable and warm inside, the sounds of the rain warring with that of the roaring fire.

He got out of bed and put on slippers and wrapped his red dressing robe around himself, he wasn't going to be getting any sleep and there was no point in laying there trying to sleep when he had work he could be getting on with instead.

He could smell dust left from Irene and Kai’s cleaning as he let himself into the study, they had kicked him out whilst they had tackled it together to cut down on how long it would take, emerging two hours later, both tired and covered in dust and the study curtains wide open to reveal the garden.

If the work was interesting maybe he would find it easier to concentrate, as it was highly dull, he sat there staring at it for a few minutes before sighing and finally putting pen to paper.

His eyes were burning as the sky began to paint the sky pink, the storm clouds blown away by the wind, for now. Kai knocked and let himself in, he locked the door behind himself before giving Vale a cup of coffee.

‘Have you been up all night?’ He asked.

‘I slept,’ Vale said. ‘Thank you,’ He reached for the coffee but Kai slid it out of reach.

‘Don’t lie to me,’ Kai said. ‘How long did you sleep for?’

‘I didn’t count the hours.’

‘Peregrine,’ Vale winced.

‘I think it was more than an hour?’ Kai slid the coffee back towards him. ‘Was that necessary?’

‘Apparently, yes,’ He said. ‘What can I do to help?’

‘If you are thinking of killing my mother, don’t.’

‘I wasn't planning on it,’ Kai smiled. ‘Irene on the other hand… I will let her know not to,’ Vale didn’t wait for his coffee to grow cold when he started to drink it. ‘I will bring up something for you to eat as well, Irene is in the library and we haven't actually seen your mother this morning, she could have left early.’

Vale shook his head. ‘No, she came here for a reason and she wouldn't have come just to mildly irritate me, she probably wants something.’

‘What?’

‘I know a good many things and what I do not know I know how to find out, except for one thing. The way that woman’s mind works,’ Kai chuckled. ‘Women have always been hard for me to understand and she is the hardest.’

‘We will try to keep her away from you.’

‘Leave her to do as she please,’ Vale said. ‘I can tolerate her behaviour, I don’t want to risk her saying something to either of you two that could cause offence.’

Vale locked the door to the sitting room that Irene and Kai occupied, a tray of tea and cake between them, as well as a stack of books that they were making quick work of. He leant against it heavily.

He was entirely silent as they marked their places in their respective books, he crossed the room, shaking off his jacket and discarding it onto the back of one of the armchairs before collapsing into the space between them.

It was with an unspoken agreement that Irene drew the curtains and Kai folded a blanket around Vale before holding him close.

Days without something to test his brain were always hard. His mind wanted to wander and it was easier to let it go, even if it brought back hard to deal with thoughts and urges.

There were few benefits for living in the middle of nowhere, no one to purchase morphine off for starters.

Irene sat down again before neatly draping herself comfortably over Vale’s lap, resting her head on his thigh, a comforting weight, familiar and much needed. His hand found a place in her hair automatically.

Kai’s arm was around his shoulder and Vale rested his cheek on him.

‘Get some sleep,’ Kai murmured. ‘It’s okay.’

His mother had never tried to understand the way that he was nor had she ever accepted the fact that his inclinations did not match up with what most people expected of him. There was no desire to produce an heir nor find a wife, he had never found the interest in taking a mistress or many.

She had interrupted his work several times already reminding him that he had indeed yet to take a wife and that locking himself away in the countryside with another man’s wife, regardless of whether or not her husband was there, was improper behaviour and people would make their own assumptions.

He had ignored it all of course, it wasn't like he hadn't heard it all before, he had been hearing it all from the age that he became aware that girls were indeed a thing that he was supposed to take interest in.

It hadn't mattered to him then, why would it? There were more interesting things to see and do than find someone to settle down with, he’d first thought that maybe he would find an interest after university, and then after a few years of his work, and then it was just a matter of meeting the right woman.

But there was no right time, no right woman.

And he was entirely happy with that.

His mother had other ideas though and had suggested a long list of eligible women. He had started distancing himself from everyone but his sister long before graduating. He found comfort in the letter his mother had sent him, the last letter in fact.

She was giving up on him.

He felt Kai’s lips touch his temple.

He didn’t need anyone’s approval.

He had what he wanted.

What he needed.

Who he needed.

He woke up stiff from sleeping sat up, but Kai was still holding him and Irene was still laying over his legs, they were talking in low voices. The room was dark when he slowly opened his eyes, the fire was the only light and the warm glow turned Irene golden, Kai too as he turned his head to him.

‘Sleep well?’ Kai smiled. Vale yawned.

‘Better than I did last night,’ He nodded. ‘Thank you,’ Irene sat up with some reluctance so that he could get up and stretch, his back clicking in a few places.

‘Dinner?’ Kai suggested. ‘I’ll cook.’

Lady Vale cleared her throat and Irene and Kai turned to her before they could stop themselves, Vale ignored her and continued to eat. She coughed again.

‘I have some cough syrup in with my luggage if you need some,’ He said, he still did not look at her as he reached for his wine glass. ‘Though perhaps a glass of whiskey will do the trick, you obviously know where to find that.’

‘I honestly thought I had raised you to have more respect for your own mother,’ She sighed dramatically. ‘But apparently, I have failed, I, instead, am ignored whilst you wine and dine another man’s wife in front of him.’

Irene put her fork down.

‘Don’t,’ Vale said but she ignored him as she turned to Lady Vale.

‘Madam, you may make one of two assumptions, that your son has decided to pursue a relationship with another man’s wife, or that he has no issue with being pursued by a married woman. Which would you rather?’ Irene smiled brightly as she got out of her seat and stood in front of Lady Vale.

‘I don’t mind what you think of me,’ She continued. ‘I have never really bothered myself with the opinions of those who judge without any true knowledge in their heads.’

‘Irene,’ Vale almost whined.

‘No,’ He brushed her off. ‘I have had the honour of meeting two of your children and honestly, they must have got their intelligence from your husband because you certainly seem to be vane and entirely obsessed with what other people may be saying about you.’

‘Regardless of how little you think of me, it means that you would have utterly failed in raising your son and I think that says far more about me.’

‘Are you done?’ She asked.

‘I was thinking about hitting you, I will be honest,’ Irene raised her hand and turned it over. ‘But I wouldn't want to ruin these gloves,’ Despite Irene saying that she wouldn't hit Lady Vale, the elder woman still flinched like Irene had struck her. ‘Now I am done,’ She sat down and picked up her wine glasses, staining her lips blood red with it.

‘I forgot how mean you can be,’ Kai smiled. ‘It is always pleasant to watch.’

‘She’s left,’ Vale let himself into Irene and Kai’s bedroom without knocking, it wasn't like he hadn't walked in on them enough times for any of them to actually care enough about it. ‘I know we are only here for a few more days, and it is going to rain again tonight but…’

‘How much work do you have left?’ Kai asked.

‘I’ll probably be finished by noon tomorrow. If we want to return to London sooner, we can do that.’

‘We can stay, a holiday of sorts,’ Irene said.

‘You have a reading list to get through, don’t you?’

#The invisible library #fanfiction #picture week #irene winters #kai strongrock #peregrine vale

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saveourskinship · 3 years

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Break Your Heart Worse

“Oh Merlin, she’s here,” Draco told them.

His Auror partner slapped him on the back unnecessarily hard. “Chin up there, Malfoy. It’ll get better.”

“You only say that because you upgraded from a Weasley to a Parkinson last year, Potter.”

A swat hit his chest.

“Bloody hell, Granger. You’ve been doing that enough I’m going to become lopsided.”

She rolled her eyes at Draco.

“I’m sick of your moping.”

Draco pouted, “I don’t mope.”

“OK, fine, you tragically lament the tatters of your wretched heart like an Arthurian prince.”

“Exactly,” Draco agreed while Harry guffawed like a donkey.

“Fine. Let me break your heart worse then,” Granger offered ludicrously.

“What?”

“You heard me, if you’re so attached to feeling like this, let me break you worse. It’ll be fun, I promise.”

“You’re insane, Granger. Why would I want to feel worse than this?”

“You want to be a king or a prince, Malfoy?”

“Fine. One date, that’s it.”

“Good luck, mate. You remember what she did to Ron,” Harry said.

Draco thought back to the weepy, catatonic mess Weasley had been for weeks after their break-up.

He scoffed.

“Like she’ll be able to coerce me into having any feeling for her at all.”

***

“Oh my fucking gods, Hermione. Where did you learn to do that?”

“Hm, would you have feelings about me stopping doing this?”

“Shut the fuck up and keep going.”

It sounded like she said ‘OK’ but where her mouth was placed it was hard to tell.

“By the way, we’re going out tomorrow, too,” Draco told her.

***

“It’s been one year Granger and I’m still completely indifferent to you, shouldn’t you give this up now?”

“OK,” she started walking away. “See you on Monday.”

He grabbed her hand.

“You’re forgetting the break-up sex.”

She smiled. “Silly me.”

***

He signed the lease.

“This doesn’t mean anything, it’s just practical.”

“Oh yes, of course. And we’re saving money by only having one bedroom,” she nodded.

“Yes, because you’re going to break my heart remember? But you can’t do that if I don’t care.”

“Yes, that is my goal. I’m wondering if I’ll do it when you propose. I’ll turn you down and you’ll be so, so sad.”

“Unlikely, Granger,” he shook his head in disbelief. “As if I’d want to be tied to you forever. That proposal you’re holding out for is never happening.”

***

“Do you understand what you’ve cost me having Potter and Parkinson in your bridal party? I had to have Theo and Blaise and they’ve been utterly fucking impossible like I knew they would be.”

“Sorry they turned your robes the same colour as my Yule Ball dress, but I think you look lovely anyway.”

“So, is this still part of your masterplan to break me?”

She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Of course, when I’m absolutely sure you can’t live without me, expect divorce papers.”

Draco kissed her and the congregation applauded them.

***

Many, many years have passed now. They are old, slow and their lives are quiet. Their last great-grandchild had left for Hogwarts that morning. Their daughter Rebea had shared the memory of dropping off Aquila this morning.

Hermione was resting in their bed, her breath laboured.

“Draco,” she grasped his hand, the texture of her skin like tissue-paper. “I’m sorry I didn’t keep my promise.”

“What do you mean?” he asked, choking.

“I really did intend to leave you at some point. But my life seemed too wonderful and I always found myself wanting to stay one more day,” she swallowed and it sounded sticky like she was trying her best to stay here with him.

“For 43,857 days I have stayed with you and I never once broke your heart. I’ve accomplished everything I set out to do in this life. All except that.”

“I think now I’d rather you didn’t,” Draco told her trying to make her laugh but she only managed a weak smile.

“I love you,” she said. “I just-” but her eyes glazed over. She was gone.

Draco laughed, opening a drawer and drawing out a potion.

“Still can’t have you win, Granger,” he told her blurry form as tears obscured her. “I’ll find you so you can keep your promise sometime in the afterlife.”

He brought the Gravewitch Brew to his lips, “Though I hope you don’t. I can’t think of anything worse than being without you.”

He tipped it back and let the concoction work.

***

“You waited for me.”

“Of course I did, I know you hate discovering things after I do,” she said.

The wide expanse of the universe opened up before them.

“Break my heart in the next lifetime, love,” he grasped her amorphous form.

And followed her into the dark.

#dramione #draco x hermione #ficlet #drabble #notebook-esque #crimson apple #Break your heart worse #I Will Follow You Into The Dark #Death Cab For Cutie

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sugasugawarau · 3 years

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Synopsis: You knew that Kageyama Tobio was not your soulmate - and that was why you could not help but succumb to the waves that lulled you away from the shores of fate + semi inspired by Eyes Blue like the Atlantic by sistaprod ft. Subvrbs. Also part of @yacoka‘s collab <3 (2.4k words)

Warnings/notes: Some angst near the end, soulmate red string au, gender neutral reader. No beta we die like Rex Lapis so if I ever feel like it this may be edited at some point asdahdhj idk LMAO

— Prologue

There are as many reasons to fall in love with Kageyama Tobio as there are fractals made by the ocean’s breath as the world inhales and exhales, flourishes and wilts, conquers and surrenders. It would not even be a hyperbole to say that in number, they remain unrivalled to the plethora of stars that stain the waves with their reflection and run deeper than the scars of lightyears that paint lines from Cassiopeia to Aquila.

After all, he is the darkest hue of navy blue.

Determination that moves in an orchestra of thundering waves, brandishing on its crest an admirable recklessness, heeding not for the need to call upon courage or confidence; polished instinct that endued one with the same awestruck feeling when facing the beautifully suffocating obscurity of their life in this world, a mixture of raw fear and the need to impart a piece of their soul in everything they do despite how fragile the skin shielding their heart is.

But the best part of loving Kageyama was that you were not - or will ever become - destined to be.

— Shoreline

Red.

It was a word that was always thrown about in conversations, the fuel to the catastrophes that were high school gossip chains, and the colour that held the mangled passion of the string of fate. Garishly predestined and easily tangled by unnecessary complications of jealousy and confusion, it is needless to say that you hated red with more passion than the love it emptily promises with a title as shallow as soulmates.

That was not to say you despised love. There was nothing wrong with love itself, a fact which you had decided firmly since the spry age of four years old. What was wrong was its combination with soulmates: a rigid formula, nothing like the walks with your grandmother on the bright summer roads littered with flowers as her calloused palm gently guided you, or the laughter you shared with your friends after a long run in the rain, hugging each other goodbye at the end of the day despite the muddy battle scars covering your arms and legs from falling countless times.

Your mind could have kept you engaged in your internal debate for longer if you were left to your own devices, but an awkward cough and the sound of a desk shifting towards your right brought you out of your reverie, bringing your drifting thoughts back to the classroom surrounding you.

Perhaps your look of confusion came off as hostile, for the dark-haired boy now sitting next to you looked at you with a slight glare that felt forced, an automatic effort to defend himself.

His tone of voice only confirmed your unconsciously off-putting expression as he gruffly stated, “Group project.” to explain his sudden presence.

“Oh. What’s the topic on?”

An awkward silence had ensued while you tried to calmly collect yourself by gathering a handful of pens from your pencil case after being caught in your heinous crime of not paying attention to your English teacher.

“You don’t know?” Came his reply, causing you to occupy yourself by finding extreme interest in a lime green highlighter you did not have any recollection of ever buying.

“Well, I clearly wasn’t paying attention.”

“You… weren’t?” The slight intonation in his tone was a stark contrast to your initial impression of him and caused you to look up at him, almost letting out an amused snort at his befuddled frown to which he furrowed his brows and shot a challenging “What?” in return. Realizing that he was genuine in believing that you were deep in thought over the lesson, a burst of laughter blossomed past your lips, attracting a few odd looks from your nearby peers and an abashed glare from him.

You paused to take a breath, a repetition of sorries stumbling their way out to appease the onslaught of nagging you thought would follow shortly. Instead, all the boy muttered was a simple, “You’re weird.”

“Sure, but that’s beside the point - were you paying any attention?”

“No.”

Seeing your face contorted to stop yet another bout of laughter to roam its way into the world as a result of his bluntness, he shot out of his seat and announced that he would go ask the teacher, unable to hide his puzzlement as he walked away. He would come to regret this decision when the teacher began to lecture him, earning more heads to turn his way as she scolded him before sending him off dismissively with a sticky note that you assumed had your now long-awaited topic.

Before you could thank him for enduring what could only be one of the worst things to experience as a high school student, he wordlessly handed the piece of paper to you and sat down.

“Kageyama, right? With this project, you’ll have me to thank for the A we’ll get,” you promised confidently, to which he responded with a halfhearted “Good luck.”

If he had been a close friend, you would have taken the small textbook on his desk and gently hit his head at his evident lack of belief in his capabilities, but settled for a clipped sigh instead. After all, you did not want to further contribute to the premature wrinkles Kageyama was making himself prone to with all of the brow-furrowing he did.

This is going to be one long month.

— Largo

Like how the ocean reluctantly caresses the sleeping shore as it wakes from its slumber during low tide, your lives slowly flowed together.

During the first week of your group project with him, he would greet you curtly, and on a few occasions, you would have short conversations about the outline of your book review.

And this singular week was enough to show that there was some (okay, maybe a lot) of backing behind the teacher’s warning about Kageyama’s dismal grade.

While you flipped through A Midsummer Night’s Dream, you would catch the all-too-familiar confusion on his face - it was written on his features so blatantly that it was almost comical, as if taken straight out of a shonen manga.

“You know if you’re stuck you can ask me for help.”

A slight scowl greeted you over the hedge of pages he had been burying himself in, followed by a biting, “Who said I need help?”

You could only roll your eyes in return.

“Please drop the prideful act. You've been glazing over the same page for about twenty minutes now."

After a few seconds of grumbling did he finally comply, and with your explanations, his bookmark was now comfortably sandwiched between the double-digit page numbers right as the bell rang. You hummed in satisfaction before returning your desk to your original spot, expecting him to rush out along with everyone else - so to turn around and see him still standing there was a bit of a surprise.

“Did you still need help with the last few lines?” You settled on asking, not really wanting to plague your break with work but offering nonetheless. Thankfully, he shot a look of disdain at the play as he stuffed it away haphazardly in his bag.

“No, I just wanted to,” he trailed off a bit, the tinge of red on his ears an out-of-character detail you decided not to comment on, “to say thanks, I guess.”

You smiled softly at the unexpected gesture of appreciation before giving him a teasing nudge which he stiffened slightly at.

“Well, I can’t have you bringing down my mark now can I?”

“Nevermind, I take it back.”

“Too bad, I have those words of gratitude stored nicely in my hippocampus already.”

From there, tutoring sessions with Kageyama became the norm, with you sometimes asking about his volleyball team after he had let slip that you were a better teacher than Tsukishima (something you would be sure to smugly share if you ever met the infamous middle blocker).

By the end of the month, all of the hard work - and a couple of all-nighters due to procrastination - brought forth an A as you had promised.

Even your relentless teasing, varying between “I told you so!” to “You owe me at least three meat buns now” which were all met with an annoyed “Shut up”was not enough to dim the smile he tried to hide.

— High tide

With the force of nature, the tide rose without warning; from goodnight texts to confessing to the first “I love you” uttered shyly between shameless souls, neither of you was sure where things began, but found comfort in such liberating chaos.

In times where he needed to be held, you were there, and the insecurities you would hide, he would turn beautiful. And today happened to be a day for both as you stared absentmindedly at his bedroom ceiling.

“Hey Tobio, what’s your take on soulmates?”

“We’ve been together for almost a year now, what do you think?” he put his phone down and turned towards you, “I could care less about soulmates or whatever else is worrying you enough to make your overthinking go into overdrive.”

“Rude, have some respect, it’s my profession after all,” you shoved him playfully as he snorted in reply, “It’s just... If your string ever appeared, wouldn't you rather-”

“Listen Y/n, did you know that I’m scared of dying but I’m even more terrified of the thought of living without you? I could never and don’t ever want to replace you. People can talk all they want, if I could find a love like ours without something as stupid as a piece of string then I don’t need a soulmate.”

“Really?”

With a flick to your forehead, he huffed in fake exasperation. “Really.”

“Huh, who knew you could be so romantic.”

“It's not romantic, I'm just being honest, idiot.”

“You sure could make do with some more lessons on manners and social tact. It's too bad you can't pick up on those as well as volleyball drills.”

Before he could retaliate, you enveloped him in a familiar embrace, burrowing your face into the large hoodie he donned.

It was effortless, his company.

— Ebbing away

But it wasn’t all romantic.

You fiddled with your phone as you waited for any sign that Kageyama had seen your messages, the pack of meat buns you had bought on a whim no longer letting off their fragrant steam. You knew he had an important match coming up against Seijoh, that he had to prove himself, that he lives hungrily and foolishly like no other. But his missing presence went beyond volleyball practice, keeping his distance from you even when he was right by your side.

Why am I stuck reminiscing about the past when we still have each other?

Why does every step I take towards him feel as if I’m only drawing myself farther away from him?

A carousel of rhetorical questions spun around your head as you stopped your slow pace towards Karasuno. You were not blind; you knew the rumours and dirty looks from your classmates were not something anyone could be immune to, that he tried his best to spend less time around you at school. The only conclusion you could reach was that he was ashamed: either of you, or the fact that he had begun to see his red string and could not bring himself to face you.

Ignoring the urge to let yourself cry, you glanced down at your phone once more, 8:30PM flashed across your eyes, followed by your empty notifications. There was no way he’d still be practicing at the school now and even if he was, you doubted he would be happy to see you. Maybe - no, definitely - it would be better to head home, and maybe stop by the convenience store you had bought the now misshapen meat buns from to get some tea and call it a night.

If only fate did not reciprocate your hatred towards it.

Stepping into the small store, the first person you are greeted with is none other than Kageyama Tobio. The whole situation was like a fever dream, and you would do anything to be able to let out a laugh and have him call you weird all over again. But all you could bring yourself to do was blearily stare at him.

He turned around quickly, as if not wanting to be caught before ushering you outside. “Y/n? Why are you here?” he hissed, a stiffness that he had recently adopted to his body language that you were now all too familiar with.

“What? Am I not allowed to go into any and all convenience stores I please?” You challenged, a part of you waiting for him to care enough to see how tired you were, to actually look you in the eyes for the first time in weeks.

He did not, opting to turn his head towards the door again.

“It’s not that, it’s just-”

“Just what? Tobio, what is up with you lately?” A pause ensued, broken by a small hiccup as your eyes dampened - God, how much more pathetic could you get than crying in front of some dingy convenience store - “Do you even love me anymore?”

How odd. You thought that by finally uttering the final question that had been dancing around your mind free to the world, you would feel better. That he would reassure you, as he always had.

Not that he would at last meet your gaze, grabbing your hand to look at the red string wrapped around your ring finger.

The taste of tears and Kageyama’s eyes as blue as the Atlantic all felt miles away from you as an orange-haired boy stepped out of the store, his mouth dropping into an o-shape when he saw that his string led to you, a disheveled mess arguing with his teammate.

“Kageyama…You knew? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I didn’t want to face the reality of it all. Because I was afraid of losing you.”

“But I wouldn’t leave you-”

“I know you wouldn’t but you should!” Kageyama’s furrowed brows, once a quirk of his that you were fond of, now elicited a sick turmoil in your stomach, “You have to. Please.”

You wanted to yell at him, let the blood pour out of any and all raw words of anger and hurt.

Who was he to decide what was good for you, to throw you at some boy you never met before, to give up?

Then again, you could never say you would not have done the same for him if you knew he had found his soulmate despite the sweet words he had told you so long ago.

So you let yourself go. For his sake.

#kageyama x reader #kageyama tobio x reader #kageyama x y/n #kageyama x you #haikyuu x reader

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nose-bandaid · 3 years

Text

the trees, the grass, the stars

Hi tiny!! I've been reading your stuff... and I love it 🥺 I'm a sucker for royal AUs and the masquerade one with Shinwon was lovely, I was wondering if I could request a Royal AU with Wooseok? I like the idea of rebel prince/princess!! But you can write whatever you like💛💛

Prince!Wooseok x (gender neutral) Reader | royal AU fluff + a little bit of comfort? | 2k words

synopsis: getting engaged to someone you barely knew, getting lost in the forest and tripping over a talking stump. none of it made sense, and yet they all added up to one of the greatest meetings in your life.

a/n: hihi !! @raspberrymuffings this is for you<3 prince wooseok hgngngn i loved writing this, sorry it ended up getting a little emotional, idk that’s just a habit of mine LOL, but i hope you enjoy:)

image from pinterest !!

=====

Did you mean to get lost? Of course not. You swore you saw something flash in the forest nearby and decided to follow its trail. That was it. A little curiosity never hurt right?

Though it turned into an unintentional adventure when you traveled a little too deep into the woods.

Were you upset that you were lost? Not particularly. Being lost meant that you were away from the party and even better, you had a valid excuse to be absent.

Was it a big deal that you weren't at the party? Perhaps, because the whole purpose was supposed to celebrate your engagement with some prince from a nearby kingdom. The two families had finally decided that they wanted to come together, and they decided that the best way to do that (supposedly) was to have the two heirs married.

But yeah, to you, it was still just a prince from a nearby kingdom because you've literally never met this man before.

Sure, you knew of him. That his name was Jung Wooseok, that his parents frequented your place for dinners. You've seen him milling around the town square sometimes — it's hard not to notice him when he towered over pretty much everyone else. And you’d say he was pretty good looking, if you had to give an answer, though you were usually distracted by the fact that his actions were the embodiment of youth. Last time you saw him, he sprinted by with 10 baguettes in his hands as curious whispers and frightened shouts followed him. They didn’t stop the boy in the slightest bit.

So hopefully this Wooseok was a really good guy, or else you'd had to do some major convincing to get yourself out of the engagement.

But that wasn't the concern right now because you were truly, genuinely, very much lost at the moment. You were certain that you've passed the same tree almost six times by now and all the mossy stumps looked the same.

You’ve never explored the forest on your own before, and now you regretted all the missed opportunities you had to play outside with the other children when you were little. Instead you thought your studies were more important.

You bit back a yelp when you tripped over something and almost face-planted into the tree in front of you.

"Ouch."

That was not your voice. That was most definitely not your voice.

The ground does not talk, the ground does not talk, the ground does not talk.

"The ground does not talk..." You whispered the mantra to yourself and dared to look down.

Your eyes followed the pair of shoes up to the mysterious man's face. His eyes bore right into yours and you finally came to terms that he was, in fact, laying on the ground, white suit and all.

"What?"

"Geez, I really did think that no one would bother me here, but I guess I was wrong." He sighed and rubbed his neck, bending his legs to make more room for you.

"What are you doing on the ground? In the middle of a forest no less?"

He held a hand up and began lazily counting on his fingers. "Resting, relaxing, thinking... sleeping."

You didn't even hear his answer when you scanned his face once more and realized why he seemed so familiar. "Aren't you my fiancé-to-be?"

"I suppose so." He got up, brushing off the leaves that had fallen onto him and you wondered just how long he had been laying on the grass for. He then held a hand for you to take and he bowed. "A pleasure to meet you officially, my name is Wooseok"

"Likewise, I’m y/n." You replied and pondered over your next question before deciding that you didn't have to filter yourself so much in front of him. "Don't you care about your outfit? You have a party to attend."

"I could just get someone to clean it or replace it." He answered nonchalantly without missing a beat.

"So that's what it's like to be rich, huh." You deadpanned. "No pressure to keep an image? Lucky."

"Oh, I'll probably get scolded like hell when I get back, but I couldn't care less about my image. The only time I did was when I had my portrait done. They painted my eyes perfectly, and that's all that matters." Wooseok mentioned that last part haughtily.

"You do have nice eyes...." You admitted quietly, though you quirked your eyebrows at his odd fixation on that specific memory.

"What was that?" He teased way too obviously.

You decided to humour him and repeated, this time a little bit louder. "I said you have nice eyes."

He blushed and you watched him lick his lips in nervousness. It's as if he wasn't expecting you to give in so easily and you took note of that. You could definitely take advantage of his true shyness in the future.

"Th-thanks." He stuttered and you laughed. In the distance, you heard cheers coming from the party and the music started up again. Food must’ve been served.

You looked at Wooseok and tried to break the awkwardness. "I take it that you don’t really want to be here either. How long do you think we have until they come to hunt us down?"

His eyebrows furrowed as he went into deep thought. "28 minutes, on the dot."

You tilted your head. "And how are you so sure?"

He dropped a hand onto your shoulder. "Just trust me on this one."

You pursed your lips but didn't argue with him. "And what should we do during those 28 minutes?"

"I don't know about you, but I don't mind getting to know you better. At least, as much as I can, before our families force us to kiss in front of the crowd or something." He threw that out casually as he stretched (it was the truth, after all), but his voice wavered a little.

"True that..." You replied softly. The atmosphere grew a little awkward again as he kicked around the stones near his feet in silence.

"What were you doing before I tripped over you?" You asked to strike up yet another conversation and he let out a laugh at your question.

"I was looking at the stars."

"The stars?" You echoed as you strained your neck to look at the decorated sky. It wasn't often that you got to be outside at night, much less all alone, and you quickly realized how much you've taken the stars for granted.

They were beautiful.

"Yeah." Wooseok let out a huff as he returned to the ground to lay on his back again. He patted the spot next to him. "Want to join me?"

"Sure..." Your voice dwindled off when you touched the damp grass and then looked down at your outfit. There was no way you're going to get out of this without staining the fabric and you paused at those thoughts. What's a good excuse for a bunch of grass stains on your back? Would a clumsy trip cover it?

Sensing your hesitation, the other sat back up and began taking off the white coat that covered his suit. He then settled it onto the empty spot beside him. "Here, you can use this. I really couldn't care less about the stains, but I know you still got a reputation to hold."

"Unfortunately, I've already lost mine." You heard him quietly add to the side.

"Thank you, I appreciate it." You said.

He was a tall boy, so it made sense that he also had a long coat and you never would’ve thought of the benefits of that fact until today. Though it still wasn't enough to protect your entire outfit, it was sufficient damage control and you reasoned that you'd be able to come up with some kind of excuse for the few, inevitable stains.

For a while, you both laid on the grass in silence, watching the stars and occasionally putting the music history drilled into your minds to the test, naming the new song each time the band at the party switched pieces. The conversation then drifted back to your hobbies and you listened to Wooseok talk about his stargazing again.

He pointed a long finger at the sky and you tried your best to follow his gaze. "That's Aquila over there. Its brightest star is Altair. That one."

"I honestly have no idea which star you're pointing at, but you sure know a lot about stars." You commented lightly.

"I have a friend who loved space." He chuckled. "He always wanted to be an astronaut and wouldn't shut up about it. Then he got caught up in all his 'princely' duties and suddenly disappeared with his studies." He hummed. "I wonder where he is now, probably looking at the sky the same time we are. He always likes to keep his habits a secret."

Your expression softened at his wistful tone. "Maybe one day you could visit his place and see how he's doing? I could come with you if you'd like, keep some company. It could be another adventure, invite him along with us."

"That'd be nice. I think you would be good friends." He clicked his mouth and you waited for him to say more.

"You ever feel like everyone's growing up and you aren't?"

"Definitely." You replied.

"I know I'm immature, that's a well-known fact about me, but it's really because I'm clinging onto the childhood that I feel like I missed out on. All those classes and formalities, looking out the window and watching other kids play — why couldn’t I do those things too? Now that I'm all grown up, I have the freedom to do whatever I want, but suddenly all of my friends have turned into the person I was when I was little. They're grown up and stocked up on responsibilities and it feels like I missed out on my only opportunity to have fun..." He trailed off and cleared his throat.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to put that load onto you so suddenly. All this thinking has, well, got me thinking, I guess. And the fact that I'm getting engaged today is a little off-putting, no offence. It's a big responsibility and I worry that I'm too immature to commit to it." He let out a deep breath and waited for your answer.

You never really thought about your life that way until you heard Wooseok put it into that perspective. Perhaps it’s because you’ve always begrudgingly busied yourself with your royal duties, but you suddenly found yourself agreeing to everything he said. The two of you were more similar than you initially thought, now that you've witnessed what's underneath his childish persona.

"If it makes you feel better, I understand what you're saying." You didn’t know why, but you felt the need to whisper. "I couldn't care less for titles, sometimes I wish I could live life as a normal person. Sounds more exciting."

Your conversation was interrupted by someone shouting your name, followed by Wooseok’s. That shout was followed by several more from different voices and you perked up, realizing that they were beginning their search for you. It must've been time for the actual highlight of the party.

Had it already been 28 minutes? That went by faster than you would’ve liked.

"They're finally coming for us." You looked over at Wooseok.

All of the downcast emotions he was pouring out before were absent and a small smile was planted on his face instead. He took one of your hands into his and planted a soft kiss on the back of it.

"How about we run away?" He suddenly suggested, and you choked at his words, not even having the chance to wrap your head around the fact that he kissed you. Even if it was just on the hand.

"You want us to run away?"

"Like not, run away, run away. I'm not going to pull a Romeo and Juliet on us, but we should mess around for a little while longer; get them to chase us." He smirked. "It'll probably give us about an extra five and a half minutes or so."

"You seem to be really confident with your numbers." You responded, hesitantly standing up to return the jacket which he slipped on without a second thought.

He shrugged. "If I sound confident enough, eventually someone will come along and believe me."

"Are you implying something here?" You laughed, appalled at his impudence.

"Maybe." He cheekily smiled and you felt your cheeks heat up. You couldn't tell if it was because of his jab or because he looked quite stunning under the moonlight, hair dishevelled and clothes stained.

The shouts got louder and the music stopped, but you ignored them and continued to laugh.

"Alright then, Sir Wooseok," You held a hand out to help him off the grass.

"Lead the way."

#kdiner #kloveletternet #pentagon #pentagon wooseok #wooseok #jung wooseok #pentagon x reader #wooseok x reader #pentagon fluff #wooseok fluff #pentagon royal au #wooseok royal au #nose-bandaid

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trudith · 3 years

Text

God can shut the mouth of the lions!

Have you ever found yourself in a situation that made you feel hopeless, as though things can only get worse from that point?

Ya'll I was there last week; stuck in a rutt I couldn't not get out of (or so I thought). I had sleepless nights, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, anxious, confused, diarrhea, stomach cramps, pins and needles all over, and no hope in sight.

But can I tell you something, the God I serve, the Lord Jesus Christ felt the pain, the struggle and the rejection I was feeling and stepped down powerfully into my situation. When I say powerfully, I mean, He did the unexpected for me. When I couldn't see my way out, the Lord:

1. He sent someone to cover my back and to support me throughout the situation. This support person did not have to help me at all and could have rejected me. However, they literally dealt with the problem as though it was their own problem and checked in on me to ensure that I was okay.

Lesson: God always places good people in the lives of His children to cover their backs in the midst of adversity. Look at the story of the Good Samaritan, look at Paul's relationship with Luke, Aquila and Priscilla, look at Ruth and Naomi, look at David and Jonathan..... I could go on.

2. He gave me dreams and songs to remind me that at the end of the day, the victory was mine. When I had those dreams, I woke out of them with a pounding heart and based on what I experienced in those dreams, their meanings could not have been good. Funny enough, when I shared them with my mom, right there and then she said, " You're going to conquer your enemies, that's what your dreams are saying." I accepted what she said with my mouth, but in my mind, I couldn't see it her way. Nevertheless, songsafter songs of comfort came flooding my mind so I was able to keep my focus on God and trust Him to make a way of escape for me.

3. He shut the mouths of the lions. Throughout the whole situation, the gossipers were on a roll. However, when I was in their presence, they were so "cool". I was told that I'd have to attend a meeting (my trial) to sort things out. When I informed my family, of course they told me to pray before I went and that they will be praying. Mom was actually on fasting that day and Dad told me that he had prayed specially for me that morning. I was too weak to say a proper and thorough prayer, but I was able to find the strength to say, "Lord please shut the mouths of the lions". My "support person" was not around when I was told about the meeting and so I told myself that I'd have to face the music alone. God had other plans. When this meeting was about to begin, my support came in and I mentioned the meeting to them and they said they'll come into the meeting with me.

I kid you not, when I went into that meeting, and the "judge" said I was to state what happened, one of the lions started to reel out the whole thing and the whole truth came out. I did not have to open my mouth at my own "trial". Do you remember Daniel's account in the Bible when he was thrown in the lions den?

Daniel 6:19-22

"In the morning, at the earliest sign of daylight, the king got up and rushed to the lions’ den.

20 As he approached the den, he called out to Daniel in a worried voice, “Daniel, servant of the living God, was your God whom you continually serve able to rescue you from the lions?”

21 Then Daniel spoke to the king, “O king, live forever!

22 My God sent his angel and closed the lions’ mouths so that they have not harmed me, because I was found to be innocent before him. Nor have I done any harm to you, O king.”

There is no one or nothing who can tell me that Jesus Christ is unreal. There is nothing or no one who can convince me that He does not care about me. There is nothing or no one who can tell me that Jesus Christ has stopped performing miracles.

My experiences with Jesus Christ have cemented my faith in Him.

My encouragement to you today is to serve Jesus Christ. Serve Him wholeheartedly, and He will take good care of you. Fiery trials are going to come, no one is exempt, but He will work things out in your favour.

God bless you!

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whispertrolls-archive · 3 years

Text

Heartbeats In Quiet Rooms

TW: Smoking, suicidal ideations, self harm implications Synopsis: Though her nightly life is a far cry from silence, nothing speaks louder to Solara than the echoes of the past.

More often than not nowadays, Solara found herself having little to nothing to say. It always felt like the energy to speak was stolen away from her, and in those rare moments that she broke her silence of her own volition, every syllable was a struggle to voice. Every sound made it feel as if her throat itself wanted to swell shut, and it felt so painfully out of place for her offer up any form of utterance that she simply found it easier not to. Beyond that, her routine was nothing special. Wake up. Go to work. Play along with her guildmates whenever they decided to celebrate for one thing or another. Go to bed. Rinse and repeat. Maybe eat and shower if the thought crossed her thinkpan.

Tonight, however, Solara felt too restless to be sleepy; unfortunately, she was also too exhausted to keep up, which had resulted in a hushed dismissal from her superior troll. It was for that reason that the Aquila strolled through the guild’s entrance doors in the dead of night, her steps measured and slow. Everything felt so heavy that she almost wanted to collapse under pressure; however, Sol knew that she couldn’t, and she was almost too stubborn to fold, either way. After all, she wasn’t built for that.

The Crimsonblood withdrew a cigar from her jacket pocket with her left hand and held up her right hand in front of her chest. She seamlessly snapped her fingers, watching as the welder built into her index finger hissed to life. She was silent as she held that flaming finger up to the end of her cigar until the tip caught aflame, then she shook said finger until the welder shut off. The following puff was slow, deep, and she could feel her throat threatening to greet the smoke with that tightening sensation. She managed to suppress the consequential cough that manifested itself, but even the stifled sound was enough to cause her discomfort that was almost drowned out by the slow burn of the smoke wisping forth from her nostrils. If anything, the ‘Crimson Falcon’ looked more like a Crimson Dragon in that moment.

How many nights had gone exactly like this one? How many times had she found herself outside, alone, and doing no favor to air sacs that had only grown more fragile over time and abuse? Not that she cared. The only reason she wasn’t also falling apart in the literal sense was because of her colleagues hounding her about self-maintenance. Well, if she wasn’t going to care, then at least she had others who would.

As tempting as it felt to slouch and melt into the ground beneath her, Solara stood stiffly with her head straight, favoring her right leg as she took another puff and stared off into the distance. There was nothing more than trees as far as the eye could see, but the Aquila looked on in listless disinterest. She silently noted grayscale spots in her vision as her eyes cycled through various settings as she puffed on her cigar once more, watching the smoke dance past her slightly parted lips as she sighed aloud, feeling the tension in her throat once again. Another eye repair so soon? She’d have to decline.

The sweeps only felt harder and harder to bear for the lowblood. As she felt herself withdrawing back into the same broken husk she had been only a sweep before, it was just another added weight to her chest. Every turn of a wrench, every touch of a tool, every spark of fervor she once felt looking at her various means of tinkering all carried with it a bitter ache that made her shiver with grief. It was that time of sweep again. That time of sweep that she felt all the more haunted by the sinister specter of loss had rained down upon her before she knew it, and now, she couldn’t escape from its crushing grip on her core. It had only been a few short perigees since they had officially parted ways for good, but for Solara, it had been a cold, bitterly bone-chilling night just like this when she had truly lost her.

Sol was beside herself. She’d heard murmurs of and borne witness to a troll who seemed eerily similar-- a cold-blooded killer, she was sure of it. The mere thought of that troll had been enough for her to balk on the spot, the ex-pilot being rattled to the core in such a way that she had begun to shake uncontrollably. Gog, now she couldn’t get either of them out of her head. It was suffocating, she felt as she wanted to claw at her own throat just to breathe again.

There was an idea that she’d let rattle around her thinkpan a few times too many. The pain of permanence, the anger of so-called ‘gogs’ leaving her desperate prayers unanswered, and the self-loathing of an ambitious endeavor that even she would admit was too far had encapsulated her, constricting ever more tightly before it fell back like the tides, only to strike with the ferocity of an unseen wrapping serpent that was ready to deliver a fatal squeeze to its prey. It had her right where it wanted her tonight.

The Crimsonblood tapped her chest with a finger as the cherry blew off of her cigar. She paused, allowing her eyes to auto-adjust as she gazed at the blinking blue light that occasionally flashed yellow, an indicator of her core’s condition. Solara narrowed her eyes, then she suddenly fastened her nails into the front of her shirt with a low growl. It was so tempting to just rip the damn thing out and be done with it that it almost hurt her not to. She could just rip it out, destroy it, and no one was there to stop her as she poised to plunge her hand into her chest.

And yet, she stayed her hand and let it drop after a moment. What good would it even do? They’d just put her back together again and give her another lecture about letting herself go. It’d be pointless. It wouldn’t free her from anything. It would be... nothing more than a cycle, just as everything else had become.

Crimson tears suddenly dampened the ground. Solara blinked, only now aware of the fact that she had been crying. She narrowed her eyes, trying to will herself to stop, but the tears continued to flow. There was no stopping them now, she realized as she folded her arms, supporting her left elbow in her right hand as she stared on and let them flow. Sometimes, she had no choice but to feel, and then it would be back to business like nothing was wrong in the first. It would be “fine.”

She would be “fine”.

#mun writes #Sol's been going through it so perfect time for some trauma venting #Solara #Solara Steele

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curedeity · 3 years

Text

Aquila's Gift

Summary: Yu’s room is full of stuffed animals, brought for him by a man that only cares for his loyalty.

The hallways of the Dark Nebula building were always long and empty. Lit by harsh fluorescent lights, they looked so sterile that you couldn’t tell at least 20 people lived here. Tsubasa took great joy in not wiping his feet at the doorway and tracking mud into them. He was sure if Doji was going to fire him for any reason, other than him discovering Tsubasa’s true intentions, it would be for that.

Especially because Yu had copied him and tracked even more dirt than Tsubasa did into the building.

It was quite weird, Yu definitely hated Tsubasa, helped along by Tsubasa’s consistent needling, but he seemed to copy his behaviors just as much as he did for Ryuga and Doji.

Speaking of Yu…

Tsubasa really wished Doji would stop assigning them missions together, at least with anyone else he wouldn’t feel bad about tricking or spying on them, but Yu was so strange and young, it felt a bit wrong to lie to him. Not that it would change anything right now, or the mission they had just been assigned.

With a sigh, Tsubasa finally reached Yu’s room, and knocked thrice on it.

It wasn’t hard to tell what room was Yu’s, despite the fact Tsubasa hadn’t yet been on this floor yet. There was the nameplate with Yu’s name on it, of course, but beyond that Yu had taken the liberty of covering his entire door in stickers.

“Who is it--Oh hey, Tsubasa,” Yu answered as he opened the door, looking at Tsubasa with a mix of obvious confusion and probably some distaste.

“Doji has a new mission for us, we leave for another tournament in 20 minutes,” Tsubasa informed him. Doji seemed to take some glee in sending Yu and him off together, perhaps he was hoping they’d murder each other one of these days.

“Mr. Doji is way too uptight about these tournaments, there are never any good bladers, all I want is a good challenge,” Yu complained, as always.

It was at this moment Tsubasa glanced into Yu’s room, and he couldn’t help but let out a “hmm” of surprise.

The room was practically overflowing with stuffed animals.

“Why can’t Battle Bladers just start already, I want to fight already--Hey Tsubasa, what are you looking at?” Yu finally cut off his whining for long enough to note Tsubasa’s surprise. He followed his gaze, and noticeably brightened the minute he realized what Tsubasa had been looking at were the plushies.

“Do you like my stuffed animals!” Yu practically shouted this as he tugged Tsubasa into the room, picking up the nearest plushie (a fox) and shoving it into Tsubasa’s hands. The fox was very soft, and the inside seemed to be beads. Yu was rocking back and forth on his heels as he smiled up at Tsubasa, picking up a stuffed animal to hold himself.

“Mr. Doji got them all for me! I get to order them online, and they come in the mail really quickly,” Yu rambled, “these are the first presents I’ve gotten and they’re so cool! Look, they’re all so soft!” Yu shoved another plushie (a cat) into Tsubasa’s already full arms.

Tsubasa stood there in… What should he say? This. This was not the interaction he was expecting to have when he came to get Yu for the mission. But really, when had any interaction with this kid ever gone the way he expected? Yu seemed to love being chaotic and creating all the problems he could.

...And had he said that these were the first presents he’d ever received? That explained quite a lot of Tsubasa’s questions over what a young child was doing in the Dark Nebula, and opened up a whole host of new ones.

But he wasn’t here to analyze this child, he had a job to do: discovering the true intentions of Doji and what L-Drago could do.

“They are all very nice, you really like plushies, huh?” Tsubasa handed the two plushies back to Yu and leaned against the doorway.

“Yeah! They’re just so soft, and who doesn’t like animals! But Mr. Doji says we can’t get a cat or dog or a lizard in the Dark Nebula, and he’s too busy sending me off to tournaments for me to go to the zoo,” Yu waved a hand in the air as he placed the plushies back in their respective spots. Then he flew out the door, calling back to Tsubasa “Come on, let’s go before the helicopter leaves without us!”

Tsubasa sighed, and closed the door of the room filled with stuffed animals behind him, following the excited kid to their next tournament that they would sweep. He almost managed to put the thought of all those stuffed animals out of his mind, all those stuffed animals given to Yu by a person who was clearly trying to buy his loyalty.

It was a week later, at a different tournament, that Tsubasa spotted it. Yu was competing this time, he was hanging back after looking at the roster. No one strong seemed to be competing in this tournament, certainly not Gingka or any of his friends. Yu could handle it by himself.

Yu could actually handle quite a lot of bladers by himself. No matter what Tsubasa could say about the Dark Nebula, and their other bladers, Yu and Ryuga were both actually good bladers. He would have to be careful if ever made to battle either of them seriously. Yu shouldn’t be that much of a problem, but he wouldn’t put it past the kid to try something unexpected.

But Ryuga…

Tsubasa still hadn’t even seen the other blader that much, it would be foolish for him to try to make strategies with so little information, but that didn’t stop him from pondering it as he wandered towards the stadium doors to go get some lunch.

As he passed the shop, he glanced inside, and paused for a moment.

The shops at stadiums mostly sold simple things, like some commemorative t-shirts and water bottles. They also sold some more specific bey gear, like angle compasses. Tsubasa had used to love buying the gear at these shops when he was a kid.

This shop had something more than usual though. Towards the back, a single shelf stood, overflowing with a collection of stuffed animals.

Tsubasa reached out his hand and touched them, somehow he had already walked over to them. They were very soft, filled with some sort of soft fiber. They were slightly more realistic than most of the plushies Tsubasa had seen over his life, and he found himself appreciating them, matching each of them to his knowledge of wild animals.

A lizard, a dog, a frog, and then…

Tsubasa stared at one of the plushies for possibly a full minute. Then he grabbed it off the shelf and brought it to the front counter.

Yu won of course. No one in this tournament could really challenge him. Tsubasa waited outside for Yu to finish receiving his prize points and trophy. The helicopter that had been sent to pick them up loomed in the background, a reminder that soon he’d be back at the bleak Dark Nebula base.

He couldn’t wait for this job to be over and to be able to camp out again.

Yu skipped out of the building, and made a beeline for Tsubasa. As soon as Yu got close enough for Tsubasa to hear him, he immediately began complaining. “That was soooooooooo boring! I can’t believe we have to wait for all these tourneys to be over for Battle Bladers. I mean, come on, I just want a good fight already! Why don’t-”

“Hey kid,” Tsubasa interrupted him as Yu stopped right in front of him. Yu must’ve been so surprised that Tsubasa did that, that he actually shut up for a minute. Tsubasa took a minute to appreciate flabbergasting the kid, before he pushed the bag into Yu’s hands.

“Nice job in the tournament,” he called as he walked over towards the helicopter, and he couldn’t help but smile at the way Yu beamed for the whole ride, a large eagle plushie sitting comfortably in his arms.

#beyblade #beyblade metal fight #fanfic #fanfiction #aquila's gift #tsubasa otori #yu tendo #IF YOU SHIP THIS I WILL COME FOR YOUR KNEECAPS #this is found family #takes place while theyre both in Dark Nebula

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ragingbookdragon · 3 years

Text

Early Christmas Gifts

A Connor Kenway x Reader One-Shot

Word Count: 1,730 Warnings: None

Author’s Note: I’m in a Connor mood and it’s December. Sue me. Enjoy! -Thorne

She sat beside the old man in the rocking chair, occasionally sipping the tea she’d made. The first snows of December dusted the ground and while it was absolutely freezing, it was too much of a beautiful day to stay in.

Her eyes drifted over to the old man who quietly flipped through the book he held. “Achilles, should I get you another blanket?”

He shook his head. “No. I’m going to head inside in a few moments anyway, (Y/N).”

She nodded and shifted her gaze to the masts of the Aquila. “Is Ratonhnhaké:ton in today?”

“Should be,” Achilles said. “but you know him. He goes where the wind takes him.”

(Y/N) hummed. “I think it’s more of he goes where curiosity takes him.”

The old man snorted and snapped the book shut. “He is curious.” She nodded, thinking it was the end of the conversation—Achilles was a man of few words. “He’s curious about you.”

Her head shot up and she gaped at him. “Excuse me?”

Achilles merely offered her a knowing smile before rising to his feet. “I’m going inside for a nap.”

(Y/N)’s mouth opened and closed. “Wait, Achilles, he’s what about me?”

“Figure it out yourself. You’re not a fool.” He waved her off, the closing of the backdoor the real signature of the conversation closing.

Brows furrowing, she bent over, her hands pressed to her cheeks. “Well, I know I’m not a fool, but what am I supposed to do?” Her face pinched and she argued, “I feel for him, but does that mean he’s curious about that? Or is he curious about colonial women in general? And to what end?” (Y/N) groaned and buried her face in her hands. “Oh, this isn’t good. Curse that old man for leaving me with a riddle like this.”

“Like what?” A voice sounded above her and (Y/N) screeched like a banshee. In her mild hysteria she jerked back, the chair going with her and she tumbled over. She faceplanted onto the back porch and lay there for a moment before letting out a heavy groan.

“Owwww!” she whined, and hands gripped her upper arms, lifting her up as if she were put a feather. She wiggled when they had her in the air. “Put me down! I am not a sack of potatoes!” They did as she asked, gently setting her down and she spun on them, immediately turning into a flustered mess. “Ratonhnhaké:ton? What? What are you doing here?”

His dark brows furrowed. “I live here.”

No? Really? I couldn’t tell. (Y/N) almost rolled her eyes and started picking the chair up, but Connor did it for her. “I thought you’d be out hunting or…whatever it is you do, you know…with your free time.” Nice conversing (Y/N), that’s really going to spur him into fancying you.

“I was hunting earlier.” He said, folding the blanket that had fallen from her lap.

“Did you catch anything?” she inquired, taking the blanket when he held it out.

“I skinned a wolf and an elk.”

(Y/N) perked up at that. “Did you save the meat?” He nodded. “I can make dinner with that.” She threw the blanket over her shoulder. “Oh! I could make elk jerky too!” She smiled. “You can take it with you to snack on when you leave.”

His smile sent butterflies fluttering in her stomach. “I would appreciate that greatly.”

Her cheeks warmed and she let out a ‘pfft’, hoping it would ease her embarrassment. Instead, she focused on, “So, what are you going to do with the hides?”

Connor opened the door for her, letting her inside first. “I will most likely make belts with the leather and make blades with the antlers.”

“I bet those would be nice to have.” She agreed, walking into the kitchen. He followed her, watching as she opened up the wax cloth. (Y/N) grabbed one of the knives from the rack and started slicing the elk meat but stopped when she felt his eyes.

“…Do you want to help me, Ratonhnhaké:ton?” her question was quiet, as if she were in the middle of a circle of deer.

“Would you like my help?”

The response almost made her glare at him, but the look on his face held genuine earnest.

“There’s some potatoes and onions outside. See if you can harvest any…please.” Connor smiled at her, and her face felt hot.

“I will be right back.” He spun on his heel and exited the kitchen. The second the door closed, (Y/N) dropped her head on the kitchen counter and let out a groan. She was in way too deep. And somewhere in the manor, she could swear she heard Achilles laughing at her.

***

The entire week was as chaotic and she had managed to avoid Connor at every turn, but it was getting harder and harder to excuse herself when he found her. Of course, she’d eventually backed herself into a corner, and by backing herself into a corner, she’d actually wandered too far into the surrounding forests of the Homestead and got herself lost. In her defense, she was looking for the hound that had run off.

She shivered violently, puffs of air coming out in shimmering crystal clouds, as she trudged through the knee-high snow. For the life of her she couldn’t remember what her father had taught her as a child. Do I stay put or keep moving? (Y/N) stopped and looked up, the full moon stared back at her. Keep moving right? Tracks mean someone can follow. Following is good, yes? A lump rose in her throat and the chilly air made the tears sting her eyes, but she kept moving. Fear was definitely not something she did needed right now. She needed to stay focused and most importantly, she needed to stay calm.

Her fingers felt like they were frozen solid, and she shoved them inside her coat, just under her arms. As long as she could still feel, she was okay. But time was against her, and with every passing second, she lost the feeling in her toes and it kept stretching, until it was at her thighs. (Y/N) took a heavy step and upon hitting a deeper bank than she realized, she stumbled over, rolling down the small hill.

She lay there in the snow, too tired to move. The cold bit into her cheeks and nose but she didn’t care. This is it. she thought. I’m going to freeze to death in the middle of a forest. Her fingers twitched and she heaved, pulling herself up to her knees, but that was all the energy she could gather. (Y/N) buried her face in her arms and curled as tight as she could, hoping it would preserve heat. It did little compared to how freezing it was.

Time passed by and her mind became hazy, but most concerningly, she started becoming warm. That’s a bad sign. (Y/N) vaguely remembered. Even I know that. She couldn’t feel her fingers now, nor her toes, and her pants were so soaked she could feel the chill to the bone.

Through the cloud in her mind, she thought she heard footsteps her way, but wrote it off as possible hallucinations until she heard, “(Y/N)!”

She picked her head up, brows furrowing as she looked around her. Finally, she caught sight of a familiar coat of blue and white coming her way rather quickly. Okay, now I’m really hallucinating.

Connor slid to a stop in front of her, his hands coming to cup her cheeks. They were so warm that they burned; a whine left her throat. “(Y/N), I have been looking everywhere for you.”

(Y/N) nodded weakly. “The dog ran off…was trying to…find it.” her words had started slurring and through her heavy-lidded gaze, she could see panic setting onto Connor’s face.

He pulled the leather bag off his back and opened it, pulling out a leather coat. Getting to work, he moved (Y/N)’s arms, settling it on her. The sleeves were fur lined and she sighed audibly.

He stared at her. “Do you think you can you stand?”

(Y/N) shook her head, or at least that’s what she thought she did. “No…no I don’t…think so.”

Connor immediately put his arm around her back, the other going under her legs. He picked her up and she found herself pressed up against his chest. (Y/N) rested her head on his shoulder, her face pressed close to his neck. He was so warm compared to her.

“(Y/N)? Are you awake?”

She moaned lowly, pressing her face to his skin. He twitched slightly at how chilled her lips were.

“I need you to try and stay awake. Can you do that?”

Wanting to laugh, but not capable, she let out a huff. “Keep me…awake.”

His chest rumbled and she felt it. “I made something with those pelts.”

“Mhm?” she mumbled.

“I made this jacket and lined it with the wolf fur.”

“So that’s why…it’s so warm.”

Connor nodded. “I made it for you.”

“For me?”

“You talked about the presents on…” he went silent.

“Christ…mas?”

“Yes, that. You said you exchanged gifts with the ones you love on that day.” His grip tightened. “I was going to give it to you then.”

(Y/N) felt a smile on her lips. “I guess…I got it…early then.” She hummed. “Any other…gifts?”

“I made you a knife.”

That actually cleared up her mind a bit. “…What?”

Connor snorted. “You said it would be nice to have one a week earlier when I returned with the antlers and hides.”

“Ratonhnhaké:ton…I meant for you.”

“Oh…I see.”

She let out a long sigh. “But I still…want it.”

“That’s good.” She knew he was smiling again. He shook her gently. “We’re almost back to the homestead, (Y/N). Stay awake a little longer.”

“‘m cold.” She muttered.

“I know you are.” He grunted, stepping over a fallen log. “Once we get back, you can curl up in front of the fireplace.”

“Yours.” (Y/N) mumbled against his neck.

“…Mine?”

She nodded. “Wanna be…with you.”

Connor went silent a moment, then he whispered, “Do you care for me, (Y/N)?”

She didn’t trust herself to say anything, so she simply nodded and hummed.

“I…care for you too.”

A lazy grin worked onto her lips and Connor could feel it. “I’m…glad.” (Y/N) sighed. “Thank you…for finding me, Ratonhnhaké:ton.”

“Always, (Y/N).”

#connor kenway x reader #connor kenway x reader imagine #connor kenway x reader imagines #connor kenway imagine #connor kenway imagines #connor kenway #ac3 #ac3 imagine #ac3 imagines #assassins creed imagine #assassins creed imagines #assassins creed 3 #assassins creed 3 imagines #assassins creed 3 imagine #ac imagines #ac imagine #achilles davenport

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petrichorpetals · 1 year

Text

One of my classes this semester is making me go feral in a fun way. He's my department head and the class is over crime and literature and we spend a lot of time talking about what makes people commit crime right?

Let's put it this way, this man quoted Freud in reference to the ego superego and id and when I pointed out you should take everything Freud says with a grain of salt he replied with "Well, he was the first person to discuss things like this."

It's making me go feral because he brings up a lot of things that were scientifically disproven and writes it off with yeah but they were influential in their field and that's why we're talking about them.

I have no issue on discussing history like that, but he has no intention of discussing the fact that it's long been disproven. The way he talks, I have no doubt that this man still holds onto the notion of alpha of the pack and pheromones are real scientifically proven phenomenons. Like as someone whose hyperinterests led them down rabbit holes and scientific studies proving that we were kind to humans that could contribute nothing to society, his class makes me want to bite something.

#aquila shut up no one cares #he also was trying to suggest that humans are superior to animals because animals can't hold complex thought #given that we've seen that birds can do math; there's animals that can communicate with us in sign language; and can see a sense of self #it's insane to assume that animals are incapable of complex thought simply because they lack the language to communicate it #dolphins have names for god's sake and they're creatures driven by pure lust #I still maintain that there are animals out there that are smarter than some humans #besides. Darwin's dumb survival of the fittest theory got disproven a long time ago #if you're going to quote science than actually keep up with your god damn case studies

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another-snape-story · 4 years

Text

That Foul Word

Chapter XI

“You took 50 points from my House!” annoyed and untypically bad-tempered, Snape found you in the staff room.

“I did,” you answered with a straight face, holding back anger and irritation. If he thought you’d be scared of his harsh tone, he was wrong. A fight with the man, who you expected to be the first to support you, was just what you lacked. You’ve had enough for today and were about to reach the breaking point of your patience. “I can bear many things, believe me, Professor. But I’m not tolerating disrespect of any kind.”

“And what kind of disrespect it was?” jaws clenched, he made an effort to sound calmer.

“What kind of disrespect would you consider misbehaving in class and ending up calling teacher a ‘mudblood’?” exasperated, you defiantly emphasized the last word.

“Shit…” Snape hissed under his breath, not believing his ears. His shoulders sagged weakly as he rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Who did it?” his asked softly, as if apologizing for the one who insulted you.

“It doesn’t matter. I’ll handle that little asshole myself,” you spat prickly, holding your head high. Snape recognized a defensive posture at once – you were hurt, clearly, but there seemed to exist no force in the whole universe to make you admit it.

“Who – did – it?” he slowly approached you. “You know, I’ll find out.” Determined glint of his eyes proved he would.

“Yes, please, do it!” you sputtered and stepped back to pick up your papers. Your movements, which Snape has already studied so well and which he noted to be smooth and gracious, now seemed sharper than usual – no less gracious though.

Snape realized this situation damaged your spirits, and his rough tone might’ve added oil to the fire.

“I’m trying to help!” following your abrupt actions, he stated without showing much emotion.

“Oh, are you?” you put off your things for a moment and straightened up to look him in the eyes. “I thought you were blaming me for taking you some stupid points?”

“Come on! What’s gotten into you?” Snape regretted letting his temper take over his mind. He regretted letting your talk go this way. Losing 50 points was such a trifle, nothing – in comparison to losing your favor.

“I don’t think you need to worry about me any further, Professor Snape, as long as there turned out to be no place for me in your House!”

“What?” he frowned. “I didn’t say that.”

“But you made yourself rather clear.” You bent to grab the rest of your notes and headed for the exit. “Good luck, Professor.”

As the door slammed shut, dumbfounded, Snape remained standing in the middle of the room in an effort to find explanation to your sudden outburst. So it wasn’t the student who enraged you so severely, but… him? An accidently dropped phrase he didn’t even give a thought to?

“Wait!” Snape caught up with you in the Entrance Hall, when you were about to step outside, but since you demonstrated no intention to come to a halt, he joined you on your way along the terrace. “I didn’t mean that. It surely is your House as well.”

“Listen, I don’t care. It was foolish thinking those chambers in the dungeons were given me along with all other Slytherins so that I could be a part of this certain community. Don’t mind me. I got used to being an outsider everywhere.”

As you continued walking in quite a quick pace, Snape didn’t see any other way to stop you – he grabbed your elbow and spun you to face him. “You’re not. For Merlin’s sake!”

You stood looking him in the eyes, and what you saw was despair. “You’re not...” Snape repeated softly, and you melted at once, feeling terribly guilty for being so testy and intemperate.

“I’ve never heard they sorted mudbloods in Slytherin,” you lowered your head, ashamed of the scene you’ve made. “And you?”

“Neither have I,” he admitted quietly.

“Can you imagine it – a mudblood in Slytherin? It’s like being a piece of shit in a handful of pearls.”

Snape didn’t say a word. He wished he could find at least one single argument to prove you wrong, but it would’ve been for nothing – he knew you were right. Although the man’s face was not easy to read, you noticed the slight change in his expression and discerned compassion in his dark eyes, which went black under a dismal frown.

“Snape?” for the first time you called his name without putting ‘Professor’ before it. “Why are they so cruel?” With these words you rested your head on his shoulder, and he froze at this unexpected contact. “They’re just children! Where does this anger come from?”

“I wish I knew,” he hesitantly raised his hands and carefully pulled you in an awkward hug, which felt more and more comfortable, the longer he held you. Eyes closed, you sighed peacefully, letting agitation and bad emotion vanish into thin air.

“I apologize,” serving the decencies and hating it they existed, you leaned back after a short moment, which you never wanted to end, “I shouldn’t have…”

“Anytime,” Snape didn’t let you finish, afraid of giving you any reason for not doing it again, and received your grateful smile in response.

“Now where were you going?” he made a step, inviting you into a move, and you followed.

“I don’t know. Just wanted to sort my thoughts.”

“Shall I leave you alone then?” he offered calmly, hiding disappointment behind his usual dispassionate facade.

“No!” you frightened. This was exactly what you desired from the very start – to have him beside, to let your emotions settle down in his calming presence. It’s not easy to preserve an equal mind in a whirlwind of hurt feelings, and the short instant you lost the clarity of thought might’ve costed you so much… The thought terrified you as much as the tall man still walking next to you made you feel relieved this preposterous misunderstanding didn’t lead to irreversible consequences. Fate to thank or Merlin himself, you avoided the worst outcome ever possible.

“So will you tell me who confronted you in class?” deep voice quietly resounded in your ears.

“Malfoy,” you frowned.

“He won’t say a word to you. Ever again.”

“I appreciate this,” you sighed, “I really do… But I don’t want anyone to stand up for me, okay? Even you,” you added with a shadow of a smile to let him know how immensely grateful you were for his support. “I’ve already shown the boy his place, and I know what to do if it repeats, which I doubt.”

“As a Head of the House I’ll have to talk to him anyway.”

“At least pretend it wasn’t me who told you. Don’t want to pass for complainer.”

“Deal. Come on, let’s think how we’re going to return points to our House.”

Warm tingles spread inside your chest, and the corners of your lips slowly crawled up.

“Snaaape?” you stretched playfully, purposely keeping the pause until he looked at you inquiringly. Getting your tongue around his name felt extremely enjoyable. “I’m happy I met you here.”

“Regarding me an acceptable person to relate? How pathetic,” he responded with a straight face.

After all the shatters of this day, you were too discomposed to discern facetious notes in his tone. Once you opened your mouth to tell him it was pathetic thinking this way of himself, he smirked: “It is mutual.”

<<<Previous Chapter • Next Chapter >>>

Tag: @diaryofafan17 @yul-is-sparkling @fullmoonshadowwrites @forthehonourof @mayumikurosake @redrehab @space-helen @fluffymadamina nadiigh @theworldisugly-22 @lukaerith-morningstar @sighsinkhuzdul @67-chevy-baby @aquila-leo @rustypotatospork @dandyrua @majusketch @fancygirl61

#snape #severus snape #snape x reader #severus snape x reader #snape fanfiction #severus snape fanfiction

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phoenix-before-the-flame · 4 years

Text

Haha! It was me all along @phoneboxfairy !

Are you beshooketh?😏😏😏😏

I sure hope you are, and i sure hope that this was worth the wait (im sorry!)

Please enjoy!

Lucy grumbled quietly to herself, the bark digging sharply under her fingertips as she hoisted herself higher up the tree. Her foot almost slipped on a whorled knot that she guessed used to be a branch, snapped by time and sealed shut like an old wound that wouldn't allow her to step on it.

She did it either way though. Lucy steadied herself with a heart pounding eep! her foot finding purchase on the same spot, stilling in her journey to regain her breath and to keep her heart from climbing any further after the scare. She glanced up amidst the tangles of branches and thick vines reaching down towards her, and clouds of grayed leaves stretching further and further than she could possibly measure. A second sky. The thought made her lips almost quirk, taking note of the scattered slivers of silvered moonlight breaking through.

The bark cracked beneath her palms and her fingers sunk even further in for a hold as the broken pieces trickled away into the still air. She squinted, the moment of reverence gone and she grumbled again, reaching out for the nearest handhold.

Why was she even up here again?

Not too far above a branch shook wildly as something leapt towards Lucy, sending down a shower of leaves to nestle themselves in her hair. Alongside the rest of the leaves she'd gathered along the way. With a light grunt he landed with ease on a thick branch a bit closer to where she was, peering at Lucy owlishly through the gloom from his odd choice of position. He hung by the backs of his knees like it was nothing, barely even swaying in his upsided downedness. The green of his eyes were almost eerie in the darkness as they ran over her unblinkingly. His arms were crossed, head tilted in a silent question of 'you good?'

Right, Natsu asked her too.

It was well after the fire died down yet sleep had failed to claim her, staring blankly up at the paled clouds of leaves with a blankness on her mind that she couldn't quite place. Which was odd really, her mind felt so full but full of just, nothingness. Lucy's eyebrows knitted together in slight confusion at her thoughts, her attention shifting to the almost empty sleeping bag near her housed by a lone exceed who took it all in tow, sprawled out in content slumber in its center.

Weariness should've been on her, and it was- a weak thrum in her bones that was all too familiar but it didn't bring with it the calming lull of rest. Something that was happening all too frequently in the recent days. Sad now that she was getting used to it.

She didn't bat an eye when her partner dropped silently down in front of her, already used to his night time wanderings through the trees. It was something he always did during missions, getting a feel of each place and maybe snag a souvenir or two. He'd given her a blank look, though Lucy thought it speckled with concern as he silently pointed above. A second later he was already on the lowest branch, staring down expectantly for her to follow. And she knew he wouldn't budge unless she did.

Lucy fixed him with a slight nod that she was fine but his eyes narrowed disbelievingly, pointedly eyeing the freshly broken branch above her head.

"Do you need some help getting up Lucy?" His voice bounced around the air, sounding louder in her ears than it should be. "It's kinda a long ways up."

"I can manage just fine Natsu." Lucy responded. She sucked in a deep enough breath and hoisted herself higher, feeling his eyes upon her back as she continued her ascent. Silly as it may be she still remembered his relentless teasing on a mission a few months ago when she needed his help to get down 'cause a bandit left her stuck in a tree. And he still liked to bring it up with an all too gleeful grin.

So no, she'd make this climb up the tree to see whatever he wanted to show her without help thank you very much. No need to give him more ammunition for future teasings.

Lucy progressed smoothly without any mishaps, the repetitive motions almost calming as they started to come naturally, the crunch of bark under her palms a welcome sound. Natsu hung close from nearby branches, oddly quiet save for the few huffs and grunts between each jump.

He was being so cryptic, it almost had her worried at his silence and pinched brows. What was it he wanted to show her? He'd left the question relatively unanswered, giving her just another silent point to the sky then hopped along.

Treetops. Lucy silently corrected herself. The trees stretched on forever upwards and the forest they traversed through almost endless. She hadn't seen the sky in forever it felt like, only tasting its presence when it broke through the treetops.

Absently Lucy grasped for another handhold, fingers curling tightly on a thick branch that left her hold before she could even pull herself up properly. The arm that snuck itself around her middle was a familiar one, and Natsu snickered at her surprised squeak. "You made it up this far just fine. Lemme take care of the rest of the journey for ya."

Lucy opened her mouth for a quick retort but he cut her off as he easily clambered up the tree effortlessly even with an arm around her, wrapping a vine around his wrist to swing up and higher. They were moving faster than she could on her own and her hands cried out in relief at no longer having to grab at roughened bark. But she still wore a soft pout. He better not use this as fresh teasing ammunition.

A chill rushed over Lucy and she realized with a startled blink that they almost neared the top, the night breeze playfully nipping at her skin. She hadn't felt that in a while. The air on the ground was so still and dead. And as Natsu broke the pair through the treetops, stuffy. Lucy greedily gulped in a lungful.

It was cold, colder than she expected and from below it was a sky but now as her partner helped her up, she saw how far it stretched. The second sky now a sea of trees that seemed to curl into waves the further out it went.

It was beautiful.

Natsu slipped from her side and she cursed at his warmth leaving her so swiftly. Lucy took a step to follow behind him but almost tumbled face first into the leaves. Then the thought struck her. They were hundreds, maybe even closer to thousands of feet in the air. One wrong step could send her careening wildly to the forest floor. She quickly plopped herself down. Best stay put.

Better instead to watch her partner, better trusting of the trees and bounding across their tops, searching the skies intently for, something up there. Lucy's eyes flitted up. Cignus, Big dipper, Aquila, Orion. Everyone was out tonight with not a cloud in sight for them to shy away.

"There!" Natsu exclaimed, pulling her out of her thoughts with a jolt. He pointed excitedly at a cluster of stars, 14 to be exact that Lucy knew all too well.

"That's it isn't it?" He asked quickly. "Your favourite one right? Cephus?"

"Cepheus, and yeah." Lucy corrected, slightly confused. "What about him?" She stared at him rather blankly and the air turned somewhat awkward. Natsu's eyes roamed her face, finding only blank confusion that made his hand and shoulders fall. He pulled at his scarf.

"Nothing." Natsu said, the nonchalance in his voice painfully obvious. "I just thought it was cool is all." Lucy fixed him with a look, a well honed skeptical one that made him look away sheepishly to the night sky.

"C'mon Natsu, I know you didn't make me climb a tree just to see the sky." Lucy joked, picking at the leaves she was comfortably seated on. "There's always something more with you." Natsu's fingers ran through the tassles on his scarf, a habit he tended to do when he was mulling things over. He gnawed on his lip slightly, brows brought low in thought.

"Not….not this time i guess." He said simply, glancing back at her. A silence floated between his words before he spoke again, pacing atop the treetop. "We've been walking through these woods for days now trying to get to the next town and it feels like forever, and that we're walking in circles and i feel like it's kinda my fault since i made us miss the train and all and well-"

His mouth snapped shut with a sharp click! of his teeth and he shook his head hard to get rid of the rambling thoughts and he sat down.Natsu turned his head to her with fingers still tangled in the tassles and a heaviness in his voice.

" I just felt bad y'know?" He continued quietly. He kept a steady gaze with her but they shook, like his eyes desperately wanted to dart away. "Having ya stuck in these dark woods, and worse you're not sleeping much. It wasn't sitting right with me. And i know that this isn't a fix it to the problem, but if you're gonna be up all night then i made sense to me to at least let you see the stuff you love about it so much?"

Natsu's lips thinned, a tinge of darkness soaking into his cheeks when the last words left his tongue. He finally took the chance to look away, his eyes ducking low. "It sounds kinda stupid now that i said it out loud……" he mumbled.

Lucy watched as he ran a nervous hand through his tousled hair, shaking free the last of the leaves that made home there. And her lips quirked at the sincerity of his words

No. It's not." Lucy mused. "It's really thoughtful of you." Cautiously she stood on shaky legs, not quite trusting the thicket of closely knitted leaves and stumbled closer to him. "It isn't your fault for any of this. And i've just had a lot of…..nothing on my mind to think about. But it's really sweet of you to do this for me."

Lucy plopped down next to him and shoved his shoulder playfully, a relieved smile already growing on his face as he dramatically fell to the side with a laugh. She leaned back on her elbows, gazing thoughtfully up at the clear night sky. The moon was nowhere to be seen and yet, everything was so bright, the stars countless in their neverending clusters and the familiar touch of their light on her skin. She really did miss them.

"Hey Lucy," Natsu piped up beside her. "If you can't sleep again tomorrow i'll carry you up here again. If you want."

"And you won't let me climb up halfway by myself first?" She teased.

"Hey i was gonna carry you up from the get go but i saw that look on your face and knew you probably wouldn't let me even if i asked you on the ground." He smirked gleefully at her. "Am i wrong?"

Lucy stuck out her tongue at him. "Maybe. But i think i'd like that Natsu. I'd like that a lot."

#fairy tail #fairy tail fanfiction #natsu dragneel #lucy heartfilia #nalu fanfiction #natsu x lucy #ft nalu #ft natsu #ft lucy #natsu fairy tail #fairy tail lucy #hope ya like this!!!!!#nalu nerds #what a phoenix can do

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ratonnhhaketon · 4 years

Text

Iron (Chapter 16)

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Church - March 5, 1778

Yelling. So much yelling. The morning had only just begun and already there had been an hour-long argument between Achilles and Connor.

“Connor, please don’t do this!” Ellie called out to the assassin. She ran behind him, not caring that it was freezing cold outside and she was barefoot.

He ignored her and continued arguing with Achilles. “Who are you to lecture anyone? You locked yourself away in this crumbling heap and gave up on the Brotherhood entirely. Since the day I arrived, you've done nothing but discourage me. And on the rare occasions you've chosen to help you've done so little, you may as well have done nothing at all.”

Achilles stopped in his tracks. “How dare you!”

“Then tell me. On whose watch did the brotherhood falter? Whose inaction allowed the Templar Order to grow so large that it now controls an entire nation!”

“If I sought to dissuade you, it was because you knew nothing! If I was reluctant to contribute, it was because you were naive. A thousand times you would have died and taken God knows how many with you. Let me tell you something, Connor: Life is not a fairy tale and there are no happy endings.”

Connor packed his blanket roll on the back of his horse and mounted it. “No. Not when men like you are left in charge.”

“In your haste to save the world, boy - take care you don't destroy it!”

“Connor!” Ellie yelled after him, but it was useless. His horse was already halfway down the road by the time she ran down to where Achilles was standing.

“Come on, girl. Let’s get inside.”

She turned to the old man with glassy eyes. “We have to do something, Achilles! He’s going out there by himself doing God knows what and there’s a very good chance he could wind up d-“

Achilles cut her off. “You heard what the boy said, I’m of no use to the Brotherhood anymore. If you want to stop him from ruining the entire war then you are free to devise a plan yourself. I’ll be inside.” With that, he limped back into the manor.

~~~

When Connor did not return home for two weeks Ellie decided she was done waiting for him to show up and took it upon herself to find out what he was up to.

“I really hope that boy hasn’t done something irrational by now,” Achilles said from the dinning table as Ellie finished fixing her robes.

She slid her sword into the sheath and walked past his chair. “Have a little faith in him, Achilles. You know he didn’t mean the words he said.”

“No, no, as much as his words hurt he spoke the truth.” He folded the newspaper he was reading in half and placed it on the table. “I’m sure we will be having an interesting conversation when he returns.”

Ellie sighed and pulled her hood up and over her head. “Well,” she said quietly, “I guess I’ll be off. I’ll have Miriam send some deer meat over for you tonight.” And with that she turned and left the manor.

Once Ellie had arrived in New York later in the day she decided to pay a visit to her recruits to ask them for any sightings of Connor. As she was walking to a tavern near the docks she noticed that an abandoned brewery down the street was up in flames. As she approached it she heard yelling and two figures flying out of a door on the second floor. She raced over to the dock where the two people landed in the water to find out if they were okay, but her heart fluttered when she saw a familiar face. “Connor are you okay?!” she yelled to him as she extended a hand towards him.

He accepted her hand as leverage but still put most of his weight on his other hand that was on the wood of the dock. “Yes, I am fine,” he said as he shook some of the water off of his hands.

Ellie had been so relieved to see that Connor was alright that she completely missed the fact that Templar Grandmaster Haytham Kenway was pulling himself out of the water. The smile on her face immediately vanished and she felt her stomach turn just from being in his presence. She had no words.

Haytham fished his hat out of the water and stood up. “Haytham Kenway, a pleasure to meet you,” he extended his free hand out to the woman in front of him.

She took it cautiously and replied through gritted teeth, “Eleanor Price, a pleasure indeed.” Ellie directed her next question to Connor. “Why, exactly, are you two working together?”

“We are searching for a traitor to the Patriot army by the name of Benjamin Church. He has been stealing cargo meant for the troops at Valley Forge-“

Haytham cut him off, “and he has also betrayed my Order. As of right now we know he is headed to Martinique with the supplies. ”

She thought for a moment before nodding. “While I do not think that Templars and Assassins working together is a smart idea, I guess it could work out well in these circumstances. I hope you don’t mind me tagging along?”

Connor smiled. “Of course not. I will always welcome your assistance.”

~~~

The entire journey to Martinique was filled with Haytham’s complaining about Connor’s ability to sail a ship. One minute he was sailing too fast, then he was sailing too slow, and at one point Haytham was convinced they were going the entirely wrong direction. Ellie’s patience was being stretched thin and she was sure she would snap very soon.

Ellie was at the bow of the ship with a spyglass, looking for Church’s ship when she spotted a ship with the words “The Welcome” inscribed on the back. She immediately turned and called to the back of the ship, “Connor, that’s her, but they’ve dropped anchor! The ship seems abandoned!” Right after she said those words a crew member shouted that there was a schooner trying to flee. Connor called for full sail and she jogged back up to the wheel where Haytham and Faulkner stood on either sides of Connor.

Not even two minutes passed before Haytham started complaining once again. “Hurry up, we’re going to lose Church!” he yelled in an exasperated tone.

In one quick motion Ellie grabbed him by the collar and held the tip of her hidden blade to his neck. “Say one more fucking thing about the way Connor is sailing and you’ll be swimming back to Boston.” She felt fire in her eyes and her blood boiling. Of course Haytham was much more skilled than she was and could slip out of the position he was in very easily, but he took her threat to heart and shut his mouth. She let him go reluctantly, even though she would have loved to kill him on the spot, because she knew they needed his help for the mission. However, she did notice Connor’s smirk and small chuckle at her actions out of the corner of her eye.

After sinking the ships that were escorting Church’s vessel, Connor had incapacitated the Man o’ War and The Aquila was about to board. However, Haytham shoved Connor off of the wheel and rammed The Aquila into the larger ship, nearly knocking all of the crew off of their feet. Ellie whipped around to look at Haytham and nearly screamed, “What the bloody hell was that?!”

He calmly slid his sword out of its sheath and walked past her. “I was ending it,” he sneered.

Ellie ignored her urge to try and argue with him further and focused on following Connor onto the other ship and into battle. She got a running start and, grabbing onto a hanging rope for momentum, swung over to the deck of the Man o’ War and landed with a roll. Connor tried his luck at jumping to the ship’s deck but barely missed. As he pulled himself up and over the railing of the ship Ellie was already in a fight with several enemies.

Connor sunk the blade of his tomahawk into the back of the neck of the officer that Ellie had distracted, and easily chained two other kills together right after. Ellie sent him a small nod of appreciation before running to the bow of the ship to help the crew members.

As she fought off the enemies, she failed to see the officer that was lining up a shot at her. At the last possible second she turned and the bullet hit her shoulder. She yelled in pain and gripped the wound, but quickly regained her composer and dug her sword into the man’s chest as hard as she could. Upon seeing the last officer die, the crew surrendered and she replaced her weapon in its sheath.

Ellie got a good look at the wound and noticed that it had hit the outermost part of her shoulder and broke through the skin. It didn’t seem to hit the bone, which she was thankful for, but it still hurt and bled like hell. She cut off a piece of fallen mast with her hidden blade and tied it tightly around the wound to try and stop the bleeding. As she tied the fabric Connor found her and immediately felt worry wash over him. “Ellie, are you alright?!” he said softly as he gently cupped her arm to see what had happened to her.

“I’m fine,” she winced. “A bullet barely missed me but it shouldn’t be a big deal. Just a flesh wound.” She tried to calm him with a reassuring smile. “Come on, let’s go find Church and get the cargo.”

~~~

After all of the supplies were loaded onto the Aquila, Connor found Ellie watching the sunset from the ship’s railing. “Mr. Faulkner said he will take the helm for a few hours so we can get some sleep.” Connor spoke with a quiet voice as to not disturb her peaceful stance.

She spoke without turning from the horizon. “I assume Haytham is eager to head home?”

“He is more eager than anyone.” His arms rested against the scratched wood of the railing. He looked down at his fellow assassin; the warm orange and pink from the setting sun cast a beautiful glow across her features. Her light brown freckles seemed to stand out even more than usual, and her caramel hair glistened with strands of gold. To say that she looked absolutely breathtaking was an understatement.

After a moment he spoke up. “Ellie, may I ask you something?”

She turned to look at him. “Of course you can.”

He hesitated before speaking, “h..how is your arm?”

“It still hurts, but I’ll live. I’ll make sure I see Dr. White when we return home.” She eyed him suspiciously, feeling like there was another question he truly wanted to ask her. Ellie took his hand in hers, her thumb lightly rubbing over his knuckles. “Connor, if there’s something you wanted to say, you can tell me.”

He gulped before speaking up. “I.. I, uhh..” A huff to collect his thoughts. “During your birthday party you were very drunk and.. y-you said that you.. umm.. you loved me.” Immediately they both felt their faces flush at those words. “I just wanted to ask if what you said was true.”

Ellie turned to fully face him and took both of his hands. “Connor, every word I said was true. I have known for a while that I have strong feelings for you, and while we don’t live lives designed for love, I’m willing to make it work if you want it to. And if you don’t, we can just forget everything I just said and go on with-“

He cut her off before she could continue. “I love you too,” he said before he could stop himself. “I will do everything I can to keep you safe, if you will let me.” She smiled a giant smile, the adorable one that he loved so much. The one that showed the light dimple on her right cheek and made the corners of her eyes scrunch up in delight. Before he could stop himself he leaned in and pressed their lips together into a loving kiss. As they parted they heard cheering around them from the crew, and the two of them immediately flushed bright red from embarrassment. Connor took her hand and led them to the captain’s cabin for some well-deserved rest.

What the two of them didn’t know was that Haytham was hiding behind the main mast behind them, hearing and seeing everything.

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ladatheimpaler · 5 years

Text

The Forgotten Queen (Part 3)

Book: A Courtesan of Rome

Pairings: MC x Marc Antony, MC x Cassius

Summary: When Marc Antony pardons Lysandra for her crimes against Julius Caesar, he gives her the chance of either staying in Rome or returning to Gaul. Scared for her life, she makes the decision of leaving Rome behind-and those she loved.

@thechoicesvita @nikkisha16

***

Lysandra froze when she saw Antony across the market. She tried to look away before he noticed her gaze, but she looked away too late. Her heart raced, and a cold sweat broke across her skin as he looked back at her. She didn’t know what scared her more: his burning fury or his chilling indifference. She didn’t know which Antony she would have to face if he approached her. She just knew that she didn’t want anything to do with him. She didn’t want to see him, touch him, or think of him. But despite her best efforts she remembered their last meeting...

Lysandra felt like he was holding a burning torch up to her face. Once the image of that torch entered her mind she thought it was actually happening. Instinctively she turned her face away from him and shut her eyes. Her body began to shake. Beads of sweat cascaded down her back. The pulse in her throat quickened. Her breathing came in short, shallow breaths. She could barely hear what he was saying over the ringing in her ears. Something about crucifixion?

“No,” he tilted his head as he scrutinized her, “That wouldn’t be humiliating enough for you, would it?”

She struggled to speak. Her voice failing her. She bet that Antony took great pride in seeing her like this. She had a response for everything, but not this time. There was never a time where he had truly left her speechless. She always had something to say to him. A way to deal with him. Whether that was by flirting with him or yelling at him, at least she had something to say. None of that mattered now, not when it came to this meeting. This was when she needed her voice the most, but it was failing her. It occurred to her then that she had never been truly afraid as she was now.

She had never given into fear.

Until now.

Now, she had no hope for the future.

When Rome had burned her village she had faith that the other tribes would aid them and they would all destroy Rome together. When Syphax was captured she hadn’t allowed herself to fall into despair for what she had condemned him to, she never gave up on freeing him. When she was separated from her family she had held onto the hope that they would see each other again.

Her family.

She had to fight for them. Everything she did was for them. If she couldn’t live then she will plead their case. “Spare my family,” she choked on the words. “I’ll take any punishment, will face any death if it meant that they would live.”

His lips twitched into a cold smile, “I know.” She had allowed herself to be his gift to Caesar in exchange for the lives of her father and Syphax after all.

Antony continued to stare at her, no doubt he was purposefully dragging out the suspense. He always had to make everything into a spectacle. She grew more agitated with the second. She felt the muscles in her thighs and biceps tighten. She wanted to scream, “Tell me my punishment, you bastard!” But he always enjoyed games and this was the game to end all games. To see the cold and prideful Lysandra become undone and beg for her life in front of the First Man of Rome… that had to be the greatest prize of all. She wouldn’t be surprised if he had longed to see her like this more than he had longed to see her body.

Despite his bravado, she wondered if he was heartbroken over her betrayal-for using his love for her to accomplish her vengeance, and just didn’t want to show it. She couldn’t help but wonder if he was punishing her for Rome or for himself.

Just as the thought crossed her mind, he spoke again. “Frankly, I don’t care what happens to you. Stay in Rome or go home to Gaul, I’ll leave the choice to you.”

Lysandra felt like she had just experienced whiplash. He had stumped her. He was letting her go? Just like that? Hope rose in her just as an alarm went off in her head, No! He’s lying to you! There’s a price, there’s always a price!

As much as she wanted to believe in her false hope, the warrior in her wouldn’t allow it. The voice inside her head was right, there was always a price. Antony wouldn’t let her go without some sort of punishment.

“What’s the-”

“Whether you choose to stay here or go home, know that you will be nothing. You will have to rebuild a new life for yourself no matter what you choose. You will either be the most hated woman in Rome or be the Queen of Nothing in Gaul. You will live the rest of your life in the dirt, with no chance of becoming something greater-”

“Oh, you are a fucking bastard.”

“-You will be stripped of any influence you had in Rome. You will be scoured from the annals and forgotten. No one will remember your name, Princess of Gaul. I’ll make sure of it.” Lysandra’s eyes widened. She had told her father that her greatest dream was to be remembered. She had told him that destroying Rome would be her legacy. She had done just that. She had killed Caesar, a Roman god in his own right, and she was to be deprived of that glory? Antony was taking her dream away from her. I should have killed him...

He smiled slyly at her, “That’s what I would have done to Aquila had you not murdered him.”

Antony had made her the most powerful woman in Rome. Had made her the Queen of Vulcanalia, but now he had turned her into… into The Queen of Nothing... He had taken her dream away from her. If he would leave her dreamless, then she would become his nightmare. “Are you trying to make Rome forget me, or are you trying to forget me?”

The triumph left his eyes as it was replaced with fury. His smile turned into a grimace. She had found a dent in his armor. Had left a battle wound in his skin. She now knew that her punishment was more for himself than it was for Caesar. Lysandra knew that Antony wouldn’t wipe Cassius’s name away from history because he wanted Rome to remember him. To remember that Cassius was a murderer and a traitor. Antony wanted the whole world to remember their hatred for Cassius; but he wanted to forget that he had ever loved a courtesan.

Lysandra gave him a sly smile, “You’re going to miss me when I’m gone. It doesn’t matter how hard you try to erase me away from history, because you’ll never be able to forget me. Any woman that you’re with, you’ll wish it was me. I’ll be in your thoughts during your waking hours and I’ll haunt your dreams. And when your life comes to an end, you’ll think of me. You’ll wonder what I came to be.” She stepped up closer to him, her green eyes meeting his dark ones, “And you’ll wonder if I ever thought of you the way you thought of me.You’ll wonder if I ever loved you the way you loved me.

“And that uncertainty will kill you more than any poison, more than any blade.” She brushed her lips against his, he gasped against her lips, surrendering to her. She pulled away from him before he wrapped his arms around her. “I am the poison and the blade. I will be the death of you.”

With a smirk, Lysandra gave him a mocking bow, just like he had always done to her. She turned away from him before he could do anything to her, and walked out of the basilica. Once she felt like she was out of his line of sight, she ran all the way to the scholae, scared for her life.

They stared at each other from across the market. Was he remembering their last meeting like she was? Lysandra couldn’t help but wonder what would happen to him, if luck would bless him or curse him. She shook her head at the thought. She had told him that he would spend his whole life wondering about her, she hated that she was doing that now.

Though if she were being honest, she hadn’t stopped thinking about him since he pardoned her. He had claimed he spared her just so she could live the rest of her days struggling, she didn’t quite believe him. He knew her after all, he knew her better than anyone. He had to know that she would never give up. That she would rise from the ashes, from the fire he had set her on. Surely he knew that she wouldn’t be “living in the dirt” for the rest of her life. He had told her himself that he believed that she was meant for bigger things. Was he secretly hoping that she would survive what he had condemned her to? That she would prove him wrong and become even more powerful than when she was a courtesan? Maybe he was hoping that she would return for him one day, that she would come to love him… If he hadn’t threatened to crucify her she might have considered his actions romantic.

Perhaps she had done something right. Maybe despite all of her mistakes and all of her maneuverings over him, maybe Antony did actually come to love her.

She hated to admit it, but a part of her had started to care for the man under the armor. He challenged her in ways that no one had ever done. Her temper and coldness had matched his. And she had gotten a thrill from their exchanges just as much as he had.

But they were too alike, too passionate, too wild. The same passion that had matched hers would have destroyed her. He would have turned her into ash before she could even light him on fire. She could survive anything he had done to her, but she wasn’t sure if she could survive him.

Yet, Lysandra couldn’t help but wonder what would happen if she were to return to Rome one day? Would she have fallen in love with Antony? How would they have reconciled? She imagined him falling out of his chair as she walked into the senate building years later. Lysandra laughed out loud at the thought. He always had the most amusing reactions

Antony glared at her and Lysandra’s laughter was cut short, she quickly clamped her mouth shut.

Shit, she thought to herself. Shit, shit, shit.

That definitely wasn’t an amusing reaction.

He began to walk towards her, murder in his eyes and pride in his gait.

Lysandra’s grew more anxious with each step he took. Her surroundings became blurrier, but he became clearer. She wasn’t able to pull out her knife from its sheath. She couldn’t even bring herself to run away. She hated the power he held over her. I should have killed him.

Antony stopped abruptly. He probably thought that she was purposely baiting him.

He looked her over, his eyes scanning her. Gauging her reaction. Observing her. Calculating, always calculating.

Did she look as frantic as she felt? She wondered if he knew that her legs were about to give out. Her whole body felt like it would go limp at any second and would collapse to the floor. Had he realized how fear had paralyzed her? Did he take joy in that or did a part of him feel guilty?

A slow smile grew on his lips and he gave her a knowing look. Antony bowed his head towards her, and then he walked away from her. He had definitely noticed that he had frightened her and he had taken great pride in it. Damn him, she thought, he won again.

Once he was out of sight, Lysandra sighed. She didn’t know if it was one of relief, regret, or resentment. She felt an ache in her jaw and a flash of pain in her hands. When she looked down, she realized that her hands were clenched into fists. She opened them and saw that her nails had embedded crescent shaped marks into her palms. And they had caused her to bleed. Lysandra wanted to punch Antony’s face just for that.

After a few moments, Lysandra looked up around her, saw that people were staring at her without trying to be obvious about it. They were probably hoping for some sort of lover’s quarrel between her and Antony. Maybe they were even hoping that she would slap him before kissing him passionately. Kissing him like she had during Vulcanalia. Lysandra rolled her eyes at that before closing them.

A headache began to rise, being around Antony always gave her a headache. She massaged her forehead as she tried to calm her breathing. She needed to get out of Rome. She needed to be free from all of this pain and suffering. She needed to be free of Antony and Cassius.

Slowly, sluggishly, she made her way through the market with her head down. She barely dodged people as she passed by them. Avoided the vendors trying to advertise their finest goods. She kept on walking, pulling her cloak tighter around her as it began to rain, softly and melodically.

Raindrops spotted her vision, but the world had never seemed so clear.

She realized that she had fallen for the type of men that she vowed to never fall for. Antony may have respected her, but everything was a game to him. He always had to have the upper-hand. He had told her that she wouldn’t like losing, but he had proven to hate it more. He always had to beat her. She always had to watch what she said and did around him. Whether he had intended to or not, he had controlled her. And Cassius… despite all of his love for her, was selfish. She had to pretend that she was someone that she wasn’t when she was with him. She always had to coddle him and put his feelings before hers. He was holding her back.

She had allowed lust and love to cloud her judgement.

Now she knew that they were no good for her, they didn’t deserve her. They had caused her more pain than joy, more fear than hope. She would never give them the power to control her. She would never welcome them into her heart again. It was best that she never thought of them as lovers, or even as patrons. In her memories, Cassius would be a senator that she had seen in passing once. She would remember Antony as the general that would host celebrations. They would become nothing to her, so that she would feel nothing for them.

And if Cassius or Antony were to meet a tragic end, she vowed not to shed a single tear.

Rome didn’t deserve her tears. She would have no sympathy for it.

It never had any sympathy for her, even now she had to make the effort to ignore the self-righteous plebeians as they called out to her- “whore!” and “murderer!” But they never did anything more to her, in fear that she would gut them. Finally they had realized that she was Lysandra of the Catauni, Princess of Gaul, a Warrior. Not a Courtesan of Rome.

Raindrops continued to fall. Faster, harder, wilder. It matched her fury. It matched her heart. It was Gaul calling her home.

She answered it.

If her hatred for Rome had granted her eight years of life, then Gaul would grant her an eternity. She would live for Gaul. She would love for the Catauni. She would be brave for them.

She never wanted to be afraid again. She didn’t want to fear for her life. She didn’t want to be afraid to fall in love or accomplish her dreams.

So she let go of everything. Rome. Antony. Cassius. She said goodbye to all of it.

Finally, she saw her family and Syphax in the distance, beyond the outskirts of Rome. Syphax and her father were loading the last of their possessions. Artemis ran up to her and Lysandra got down on her knees to scratch her tummy.

“Get up you lazy cur!”

Lysandra gasped, pretending to be insulted, “Don’t talk to Artemis like that!”

Cingerix snorted, “I was talking to you, not her. Artemis has actually been helpful, while you-” Cingerix glanced at Lysandra, his brow furrowed as he took in her wet appearance, “While you fell into a lake?”

“It was raining near the market earlier.”

“Ahh,” Cingerix said, gazing at the horizon. The storm clouds drawing nearer to them. She wondered if he knew why she was on the other side of the city, knew what she was up to. If he did know, he didn’t ask her about it. She was thankful for that. He nodded, “We’re just about done. Come on, cur.”

Lysandra stood up. Cingerix gave her a deadpan look, “I was talking to the dog.”

“Ha-ha,” Lysandra said before punching his arm. Cingerix simply grinned at her. As she followed him to where the rest of her tribe was, she asked him, “Where’s my monkey?” Lysandra had scarcely seen Cirta in weeks, ever since Cingerix came back into her life. He hadn’t even asked if he could have him, he simply scooped Cirta into his arms and took him.

Cingerix ignored her, dumping some blankets into her arms, he pointed at the cart furthest from them, “Put these blankets over there.”

Lysandra scrunched her nose at his authoritative tone and yanked the blankets away, heading to the direction where he had pointed to. She had just put the blankets away when she heard skittering noises. Lysandra’s eyes narrowed as she leaned into the cart, searching for the noise. Something reflected in the dark and before her mind could process what it was, it lunged for her.

“Ahhhh!” Lysandra let out an ear-piercing scream and covered her face with her forearms. She heard cheerful chittering sounds-and laughter. Lysandra furiously removed her arms from her face, “Cingerix!” Cingerix’s laughter grew louder.

“Cirta-” Lysandra turned back to the monkey, trying to calm her racing heart, “Cirta. What are you doing?” She reached out to grab for him, but Cirta dodged her, darting out of the cart. Knocking into Lysandra and making her crash into the cart.

The cart shook at the collision. She heard some clattering and when she found the source of the noise, she saw the amphora laying haphazardly on top of a pile. It started to tether side to side. Lysandra reached out to grab for it before it fell.

But the longer it was in her hands the more she wanted to destroy it. It was the last thing she had to remember Cassius, to remember the love they had once shared. If she destroyed it, she would destroy the last of them, and break the bond between her and Cassius for good. Then she would be free of him.

Before she could think the better of it, she lifted the amphora over her head. Closing her eyes, she released it.

Her heart skipped a beat as she anticipated the shattering sounds of pottery. Lysandra barely registered the sudden yell… and a thumping sound? It wasn’t what she had quite expected to hear. When she opened her eyes again, she saw Syphax before her. He held the amphora in his hands, his eyes wide. Once recognition crossed his mind that he had saved the fragile gift, he laughed with relief. Syphax faced her with an accomplished smile, “Told you I wouldn’t let you break it.”

Lysandra smiled slyly at him and turned away from him. Over her shoulder she simply said, “Hm.” As if she were telling him, “We’ll see.” She could have sworn that she heard Syphax gulp. Even though she probably unsettled him a little, he followed her to the horses.

A few minutes later, the Catauni were ready to head out. Victus, Delphinia, and Cingerix led from the front, with Artemis gleefully trailing after them. Slowly, the Cautani began to exit out of Rome. Lysandra stayed in the back. She had told her parents that she would guard the rear, but in truth she wanted to gaze at Rome one last time.

She took it all in. The grand buildings and god-like statues. The paved roads and gushing water fountains. Even from a distance, she could see some people mingling about.

Syphax rode up next to Lysandra and they gazed at Rome together.

The setting sun gave the city an angelic glow, making it look like paradise. But the darkening sky said otherwise. Lysandra knew otherwise. The architecture was built by the bones of the oppressed. The water fountains were filled with the blood of the conquered. The jewels were ripped off of the necks of those they had slaughtered. And the people… they felt that they were part of the greatest civilization the world had ever seen, and everyone else were barbarians. But that wasn’t the case at all, they were the barbarians.

Syphax squeezed her hand, “It’s time to go…”

Lysandra gave a sharp nod, not fully comprehending what he had said. She blinked a few times, trying to readjust to her surroundings. The sun was now low in the sky, barely breaking through the dark clouds. She frowned at Rome before she met Syphax’s gaze.

He gestured with his head behind him, “Everyone’s just about cleared out, we should probably be on the lookout now.”

With a nod from her, they both turned their horses around and began to follow the rest of the Catauni. She had to resist the urge to look back at Rome, to look for them. She clutched at the reins and forced herself to face forward, towards Gaul. After a few minutes, she relaxed in her seat. The temptation was gone.

Up ahead she heard her parents and Cingerix laughing. She smiled when she saw Cirta resting on Cingerix’s shoulder, chittering happily while Cingerix smiled brightly at Euthymios.

Lysandra looked around her and saw that all of her people were talking with excitement, it made her heart swell. Quietly, she began to hum the song she had composed that day. Syphax looked at her with excited curiosity. She grinned at him before singing out loud.

Syphax listened to her voice intently, eventually being able to match her rhythm and then he was singing the lyrics along with her. And soon everyone was singing her song. She cringed when she heard Cingerix’s cracking singing voice from the front, but she was still grateful for his support. For all of her tribe’s support.

Under a blanket full of stars, Lysandra blushed at the thought of the Catauni continuing to sing her song once they arrived home to Gaul. They would sing it in front of every campfire. They would sing it for generations after she was gone. Her song would be her legacy. She would be forever grateful that she had chosen Gaul over Rome.

As Lysandra traveled farther away from Rome, a calmness overtook her. It was stronger than her hatred for Rome. Stronger than the lust she had felt for Antony. It was even stronger than the love she had felt for Cassius. She was at peace. She was happy. She was home.

She smiled in the dark.

Lysandra was finally free.

#a courtesan of rome #playchoices #a courtesan of rome fanfiction #choices fanficfion #acor fanfiction #marc antony #acor marc antony #cassius longinus #acor cassius #mc x cassius #mc x marc antony #my written works of fiction #the forgotten queen

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komahinasecretexchange · 5 years

Text

Title : N/A

Author : @aquila-and-altair

For : @bidoofgodofdestruction

Rating/Warning : None

Prompt : Post-canon

Author’s note : N/A

Izuru, or Hinata as they he decided to call himself, finished his work on Nekomaru’s pod for today. There was only a couple of students that were still in a coma, which meant that soon, hopefully within the week, all of their class would be awake.

Some students took more time to wake up, but Hinata had expected it. Nekomaru was the hardest to manage, as he essentially died twice in the simulator, and had a different body in the end. Mikan needed a more complex and meticulous work, due to her despair taking over her mind in both reality and the simulation.

Fortunately, Hinata was not the only one working to wake up everyone. From the beginning, he had Souda’s help for the pods, to lessen his work. As many talents as he had, he hadn’t found a way to duplicate himself (yet). And now, he had extra help. From someone he cared about in the game, and whose death had saddened him greatly.

It took him a lot of work, but he finally found a way to recreate her code.

Chiaki.

Chiaki, who helped him creating a new future. Who believed in everyone. Who sacrificed herself, by revealing herself as the ‘traitor’ sent by the Future Foundation.

Hinata, after waking up as Izuru, realised that Monokuma couldn’t have completely destroyed an AI, so after checking the other students’ wellbeing, and arranging things with Naegi and the others, he got access to the code for the simulation and managed to find the remains of her code, and got her back.

Now, more and more students were waking up, only a couple left, and their class would be whole again. As many of his classmates reassured him, they all appreciated their time at Hope’s Peak Academy, but it wasn’t the same as the time in the simulation. After all, in Hope’s Peak, they didn’t communicate much with each other, and this how she…

No time to remember that wretched girl, Hinata stopped his train of thoughts.

After all, he had decided to create his future, independent from his past as despair. This was why he decided to live on as Hinata Hajime.

To him, the situation was the best achievable for all of them. When he figured out the way to wake up everyone, he almost couldn’t believe it. When they tested it out on the first patient and saw the face of their classmate they thought to be dead, Sonia cried, Kuzuryuu looked hopeful, Owari jumped everywhere, Souda was somewhat wary, but in the end was too happy to care. Of course, the patient themself was confused. After being given a recap of what happened, it took a while, but they eventually reached a mutual understanding. The others were worried (even if some did not admit so), but Komaeda understood and accepted the situation easier than anticipated.

Komaeda spent some time alone, however he eventually reached out to Hinata. After a few weeks, they shared memories of their time in Hope’s Peak Academy, back when life was simpler, and yet their relationship had been complicated. Komaeda, who thought talentless reserve course students would bring less hope, and Hinata who admired the Ultimates. They had somehow formed a weird friendship, but in was meaningful to both of them.

They eventually had to bring up a touchier subject, which was their time as Ultimate Despair. Komaeda talked about the Warriors of Hope (Hinata had to stop himself from raising an eyebrow at a group influenced by Enoshima called the Warriors of Hope), and how despair allowed him to understand that who he considered to be talentless people could bring hope. At that time, he was making bad decisions, Junko had twisted his already obsessive take on hope to serve her own objectives, which was to bring more despair.

However, with a new perspective influenced by the three main parts of his life – his time as a student of Hope’s Peak Academy, his time as Ultimate Despair, and his time in the Neo World Program – he created for himself a new perspective on his dear hope. Hinata was quite content with his much healthier and sane way of coping.

With a small smile, Hinata went looking for Komaeda, as they had made plans to spend some time together. They still had to label their relationship, as they had kissed multiple times, and admitted to being attracted to each other and liking the other as more than friends, but with the mess that was their lives, they were taking things slowly, to their own pace.

Komaeda was in the library, patiently waiting for Hinata to arrive while reading a book. The islands were not connected in the real world, so they had to take a boat to get to the different islands. While none of them minded much, it could take some time to navigate between the different islands, which was why he had arrived in advance to their meeting? Date?… Once again, Komaeda did not know how to qualify their plans.

Still, he was waiting in the library, reading a book that was missing some pages. It made for a new way to read a book, trying to guess what happened in the missing pages. Each time Komaeda turned the pages, he could see the brand-new hand that had been offered to him by Souda and Hinata, as a token of apology and as the foundation of new relationships between them all.

He was glad to be rid of the rotting hand, that reminded him of the ways Enoshima found all of his weaknesses – his diseases, his only friendship with Hinata that had just disappeared, his loneliness, and his desire to be understood and loved – and used them to manipulate him. And he let her, because he had given up on his life, and his classmates’ hope that had once been shining had disappeared, starting with the double murder of Kuzuryuu and Koizumi’s family and friend.

But now, he had found new hope, and everything looked like it was getting better.

He looked up when he heard footsteps from the entrance of the library. Oh, it seemed he had been reminiscing for too long and had not paid any attention to the ever-flowing time. Hinata stood in the entrance way, smiling fondly at Komaeda. The luckster could not stop himself from blushing at that smile, and those gorgeous red eyes that looked like they were looking at his soul and cradling it up… he had to stop himself there.

“I’m sorry Hinata-kun, I guess I did not pay attention to the time,” Komaeda apologised, as he placed a marker and shut the book.

“Don’t worry, I had expected it anyway. Now, let’s go to that beach house!”

Hinata’s voice was soft, and Komaeda followed him as they went to the beach. The evening sun was beautiful, and formed, if they ever admitted it, a quite romantic place. They sit in the sand and stated looking at the setting sun. When one wasn’t looking, the other tried to look the sun reflected on their figures. After a while they both looked at the same time. They were startled when their eyes connected, but after a few seconds of total silence, they both started laughing at their awkwardness.

“Hey…” “Tell me…”

They both said at the same time. They chuckled again, Komaeda made a ‘go one’ gesture with his hand.

“Komaeda, do you… want to go back to my cottage?”

“Am I boring you already?” Komaeda asked, cheekily.

“No! I… was thinking… if you wanted to, we could… Stop smiling like that.”

“Am not.”

“Of course not. We could spend the night together, if you are okay with that?” Hinata felt uncertain.

“Mmh… Am I okay with that?” Hinata shot him an unimpressed look, and Komaeda grinned. “Of course. But we are going to cuddle, and I want to be the big spoon. You have been hogging that place for a week now, and I want it now.”

“Fine, fine!” Hinata relented, putting his hands in the air with a small smile.

Komaeda stood up, offered his robotic hand to Hinata to help him get up, and then started to run towards the boat.

“Wh- Komaeda! I know your illnesses are not life threatening anymore, but that does not mean you can start exhausting yourself for no reason!”

Hinata had indeed found a way to stop the spreading of both of Komaeda’s illnesses – he of course immediately sent his results to the Future Foundation to help other sick people – as his break from helping his classmates. Because, as Kuzuryuu put it, of course the bastard’s way of taking a break is working on other just as hard projects. It was a habit that came from both the original hard-working Hinata and no-hobbies Kamukura.

After catching up with Komaeda and giving him a short lecture, they got on one of the boats – the other would simply stay until another person retrieves it – and went back to the first island, where the cottages were.

As they left the boat, they intertwined their hands, and walked towards Hinata’s cottage, taking pleasure in each other’s presence.

Once they were inside, they changed into night clothes, finished their preparations for the night, and went under the covers. Komaeda had been in Hinata’s cottage multiple times, so he had his own belongings in Hinata’s cottage, and Hinata had his in Komaeda’s.

As promised by Hinata, Komaeda got to be the big spoon, at least until Hinata turned over, to look at Komaeda’s face intensely. Komaeda blushed again – he really blushed easily, didn’t he – and put his forehead against Hinata’s. They took in each other’s presence, and no words were necessary.

Hinata gave a peck to Komaeda’s lips, then rested his lips for a few seconds against Komaeda’s blushing cheek. They basked in each other’s presence and went to sleep with light hearts.

After all, it was their choice to make a better future, and they would take any chance they had at happiness.

#komahina #fanfiction #komahina secret exchange

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