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yoooespinosa · 3 years

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could you please write a draco x reader fic, where the reader is hopelessly in love with draco, and she's not afraid to show it. but draco doesn't feel the same. and draco being draco, he rejects the reader with no remorse. then when the reader finally comes to the realization that she deserves better, she started seeing new people (not necessarily dating, but more like talking), then that's when draco feels a bit jealous now that the reader isn't all over him anymore. the rest is up to you, love! just something really angsty, you could end it in any way you'd like.

also, sidenote. you're an amazing writer and i love you!!

a/n: Thank you for your request! ily <3

To say you had a crush on Draco Malfoy, was an understatement.

You couldn't help it, you couldn't just stop the feelings you developed every time he came around.

When he walked into the room it was butterflies breaking out of their cage, palms growing sweaty and your heart racing so fast you were scared you'd be able to see its indentions.

It was scary at first, to have such feelings at only thirteen years old. So you did your best to ignore them. You did your best to stay out of his way.

That only worked for so long.

When you are friends with Draco and the people that surround him, it becomes very hard to stay out of his path.

So it was only inevitable that your crush on him would become so much more. Especially as the years went on.

He hadn't made it much easier. Sometimes you felt as if, maybe, he returned your feelings. How could you think otherwise? With the way he walked with you to class, carried your books at times and spent time with you. Just you. Alone.

How could you not fall in love with him.

With all that simmering in you, you finally let it out. You made your affections obvious, not afraid to show Draco how you felt for him. You had thought it was welcomed. You thought that the feelings would be returned.

It seemed as though he could only tolerate you for so long. Yes, that was the right word for it, the only thing he had for you was toleration.

Your shoes sounded on the stone under you, on your way to the Slytherin common room. You had just got out of detention with professor Snape. You suppose it was well deserved, you had seen Draco almost put the wrong ingredient in his potion, so you being you had wandered to his table and helped him, much to Snapes dismay.

Whispering the password, you made your way through the dim passage. Chattering of people from all years and faint laughter was heard all around.

You spotted your friends right away, seated by the green flamed fireplace, as usual.

"She just can't take a hint." You heard Draco grumble, you paused your steps, you didn't mean to eavesdrop but it seemed as if your feet had a mind of its own.

"Wait," Blaise closes the book he had in his hold. "who are we talking about again?"

Pansy sighs, seeming they had been on the topic for some time. "We're talking about y/n."

Your brows furrow. Going back to the first thing you heard Draco say, she just can't take a hint, what was that supposed to mean. What hint?

"Why can't you just tell her how you feel?" Theo adds, his voice is laced with annoyance, maybe this isn't the first time they've talked about this.

"I thought how I felt would be obvious enough, without having to say anything." He huffs.

"Well," Theo sighs. "apparently not."

You were becoming anxious. What were they talking about and what exactly was Draco feeling? There was streak of hope in you, maybe he'd confess right here that he felt the same.

"What do you suggest I say then, oh-wise-one?" Draco asks teasingly.

"Easy, just say exactly what you tell us." He clears his throat dramatically, adopting a mock version of his voice, "Y/n, you have to be one of the most annoying girls, I have ever had the dissatisfaction of meeting. Please, oh please take the hint and leave me alone because these attempts at getting at me are getting more pathetic each time." He finishes with a clumsy curtsy.

The other Slytherins try to stifle their laughs.

You hadn't even noticed the gasp that escaped your throat until four heads turned to your direction.

"Y/n, I didn't kn-" You cut of Theo's words and apologetic stare.

"Is that true?" You ask Draco, your voice low, laced with hurt. Your nose was stinging and your bottom lip hung heavy, but you refused to cry in front of them. You wouldn't give them another weakness to laugh about.

Draco managed to keep his face blank, no emotions shining through. He shrugged, "Pretty much summed it up."

You almost flinched. He didn't even care about the hurt those words brought you.

You left without a look back. Leaving behind your friends call of your name. They weren't the ones you wanted an apology from. They had known how much you felt for him and didn't even bother telling you that it was definitely not mutual. They even laughed, like it was a joke, like your heart was a comedic topic.

The cold air hit your face, freezing against the tear stain tracks. You sat on a lone stone bench in the court yard, letting those tears make a home on your cheeks.

It wasn't obvious--his dislike to you. If it was, you would have gave up long ago. But a part of you felt that there was hope and you had chased after that.

Why couldn't he have just told you when you first let your affections known, it seemed that he had encouraged it back then, with lingering touches and soft smiles.

Looking back now, you notice that those advantages had slowly disappeared. You had been too caught up in his silky hair, those gray eyes filled with mirth and mischief, his angular face with high bones that no one could compare to, that you hadn't notice everything was unrequited.

A sick part of you even felt honored to have your heart broken in the hold of his beautiful hands, the part that saw him do no wrong.

Maybe that was the first problem, you put him on a pedestal, so high up you weren't able to see anything negative of him. You weren't able to see his cruel reality of his feelings towards you.

And he didn't even seem sorry. He didn't even look bothered by the damage of his words.

You were so nice and considerate to him. You would support him at every quidditch game, cheer the loudest even when he lost. You bought him presents for every one of his birthdays and even Christmas, each one sentimental and thoughtful. You had comforted him when he got those letters, that he despised, from his father. You had voiced encouragements when he showed a little tell sign of his insecurities. You had been there for him.

And he treats you like this, like you can be so easily dismissed. You didn't deserve that, you didn't deserve to be called pathetic for having normal feelings and then being laughed at for it.

The longer you sat on that cold bench, the angrier you got. A bitter feeling growing in your stomach, melting away those knots.

You wasted all this time and effort on some guy who didn't even deserve it, some guy who didn't appreciate you. It wasn't fair.

"Hey, you okay?" A familiar voice sounded through your revelations.

You looked up and met green eyes framed with circular glasses.

"Yeah. I was just thinking." You mumbled, the bitter taste was stuck on your tongue, you wanted rid of it.

"Mind if I sit and think with you?" Harry asked, he was nervously scratching the back of his neck, smiling warmly at you.

You offered him a smile, welcoming his genuineness. "Go ahead."

He sat there with you for hours. Surrounded by the sound of wind. It was nice and comfortable. The bitter feeling leaving you completely. You were content now, even if you could still feel the ache in your arms from holding onto Draco for so long.

Weeks had passed. Weeks of no signs of you. The first week Draco hadn't been worried, a little curious, but that was all. The longer it went on though, he became a little more than curious. Not because he cared, cause he didn't, just that if something happened to you, it would be his fault. His rejection was the reason you ran off like a fool to who knows where.

Which is the only reason he went looking for you. He already got a lot of shit from the others, he didn't need more problems stacking up.

He checked all of your favorite places. Starting with that tree down by the black lake that you enjoyed to lean on and watch the sun go down, the sunset wasn't near so he should've known you would not have been there.

He then went to the gardens, there was a bench there that was next to a small pond. It was filled with odd creatures and was home to your favorite flowers, lotus's. You weren't there either.

Lastly, he went to a certain abandoned hall. You had to be there. You went there to be alone with your thoughts, you had taken him with you there a few times. There was a big window there with a thick ledge, streams of sunlight beamed through and tiny rainbows would reflect on the opposite wall due to the cracks on said window.

He heard you before he saw you. A soft laugh reverberating through the empty hall, a laugh he had always found annoying. Hearing it now though, just made him want to get closer to you.

So he did, walking with light footsteps. He froze, you were not alone. Sitting there in the space he once accompanied, was Harry fucking Potter. What kind of sick joke was this?

Why were you sitting with him? And does that mean you just laughed at something he said?

Your laugh sounded through again, once piercing now melodic. It was a bitter feeling, Potter shouldn't have the honor of dragging that sound out of you, he shouldn't even witness it.

Draco left the hall before either of you saw him, he needed to get himself in check.

More weeks passed. Weeks of you hanging out with Potter. You were doing things with him that you had done with Draco.

It was on purpose, you had to be doing it on purpose. You were simply trying to make him jealous and it was annoyingly working.

But how could you be doing that when you didn't even look back to see a reaction.

Draco didn't know what to think. He didn't even know what to feel, or more like let himself feel. Something had changed in the weeks you were away from him.

A revelation of sorts. He missed you. Missed what you would do for him. He regretted what he said and what he never had the chance to say. Because maybe deep down those feelings had been returned, but he was just too stubborn to show.

And now he's seeing you realizing that you deserve more than blurred lines and assumptions. And he's realizing maybe Potter is that more that you deserve.

Draco doesn't like that one bit, he can't even stomach the thought. So he promises to himself that he will do everything in his power to win you back. Even if that means saying that he was sorry and admitting that he was in the wrong, something he's never had to do before.

But if that makes you his again and gets you away from Potter, then its worth it.

Part 2

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buckys-other-punk · 3 years

Text

Merciless

Pairing: Asshole Ex-Boyfriend!Chris Evans x Reader

Request: Could I have a part 2 to Insensitive were the reader comes back and she’s a bad bleep?

Summary: A couple months after their breakup, Y/N has changed since the last time Chris saw her.

Word Count: 1.3K

Warnings: mentions of previous cheating, alcohol, cussing, mentions of sex, and badass reader aka justice lol I don't know

A/N: Hello! Thank you @vanillabqrnes for the request apologies for this taking forever and I hope you like this! Also sorry to those who follow me, I promised to write more and that didn’t happen, but here’s something lol. Whenever I wanna write I open my computer and then bam writers block. Also please don’t mind any minor mistakes this is unedited. Anyways hope you enjoy and I’ll meet with you at the end of the fic ; )

Previous Part

It had been six months since your breakup with Chris and honestly you were doing great. I mean at first after all the rage you remembered the good memories from your relationship. While recalling those “good”memories you realized that four months prior to you finding out he cheated that he had been acting strange and distant. But you’ve moved on and could care less about that asshat.

You quickly moved on and actually you’ve completely changed your mentality when it comes to relationships. You have started to become more comfortable with yourself and not let anyone walk over you. Your closest friends have noticed your change in demeanor and they love it. They have literally called you a badass heartbreaker, solely because you have turned down almost every guy who reminded you of your asshole ex-boyfriend.

With your new look and attitude you were able to find the perfect match for you. You met your boyfriend, Henry *cough Henry Cavill cough*, at a party hosted by a mutual friend. The two of you were trying to avoid the crowd which didn’t help since the two of you were seated at the bar. You both had people flock towards you offering to buy drinks, which you both rejected. The two of you noticed one another when a woman asked Henry for his number, he declined, then she started flirting with you. You shook your head and scoffed, turning her down as you stood from your seat. You walked closer to the man taking a seat right next to him. After that the two of you had a pleasant conversation about who had the most people to hit on them, you won, and then the rest is history.

Your new relationship was completely different from your previous one. Henry adores you, treating you way better than you know who ever did. Also lets just say the sex was clearly better and you learned new things about yourself with your boyfriend. You never really got to explore that side of you when you were with Chris. He would be the one to take charge and never let you try something new.

Anyways you and Henry were actually going to lunch at one of your favorite fancy restaurants. Opting to sit near the open glass window you ordered your food. You didn’t give a fuck how these rich people were staring at you because you were wearing. You wore a long leather coat showing the right amount of cleavage and thigh high black boots. Henry wore a white button up shirt that clung to his muscles and dark blue dress pants. You laughed at a joke that Henry made, you glanced out the window and your eyes widened. Henry looked outside and he felt his blood start to boil.

*Chris’ POV*

After the break up the infamous Chris Evans was having a slightly rough time. He still didn’t understand what he did wrong. Then about a few months later Brittany, his second girlfriend while dating you, dumped Chris because she apparently found a better, richer man. Chris had been miserable in his house ever since. He thought about calling you after his break up with Brittany, but then he thought a grand gesture would be better. So he ordered the most expensive bouquet of roses and had them delivered to your house.

A letter was immediately sent back saying that you had moved out of your small apartment, but the man who lived there kept the expensive flowers. Chris yelled out in frustration which startled his maid. She tried to comfort him telling him what he wanted to hear, that you would eventually come back to him, but deep down she knew that what she said was a lie. She knew about what her boss had been doing, but Chris offered to pay her to keep quiet.

Chris never stopped thinking about you. He would walk by your old apartment, sometimes even drunk. The man who lived there always saw him through his window feeling a bit bad for Chris, but assuming he probably deserved the heartbreak. As more months passed Chris decided that drinking would help numb the pain. It didn’t, drinking honestly made him think about you even more. Thoughts and images of you flooded his head and he didn’t know if he wanted them to stop or continue.

Chris decided that going out with other women would help, the break up messed his game. He would accidentally call his new girlfriends your name and some would stare at him with a blank face and the rest would ignore it. Eventually he found a woman who resembled you to the tee. The two of them were together for a while and Chris was kind for getting tired of her because she wasn’t you. He decided to go to a fancy restaurant to make reservations for their most elegant seating to break her heart. That’s when he saw you through the window with a man.

----------------------------

Henry looks back at you, “Is that?” You nodded your head and stood up from your seat. “Be nice.” he huffed as he remained in his seat unfolding the napkin on the table and placing it on his lap.

You stormed out of the restaurant stopping Chris from entering. Chris was shocked by how you dressed, he never saw you dress like that before. You saw Chris eye your entire body looking from your head to toes stopping at your chest.

“What do you want?” you harshly said crossing your arms over each other.

“Obviously, I’m here to make a reservation.” he snarkily replied. “How was I supposed to know you would be here?”

“Bitch, I don’t know?!” you exclaimed. “It’s not like this is my favorite restaurant.”

“Again, how was I supposed to know that?” Chris angrily replied.

“Seriously?!” you huffed. “You’re still a dick you know that?”

“So what? You gonna teach me a lesson?” he flirtatiously said.

“God, you’re disgusting.” saying as you turned away from him.

“Wait,” he stopped you, grabbing your arm and pointing to the window, “who’s that you’re with?”

Snatching your arm back from him. “That is my boyfriend, no begone.” you said shooing him away not caring about the people who were staring.

“Boyfriend? I bet he doesn’t treat you as well as I did.” he says c, crossing his arms. You slapped his face hard and shook your head.

“Oh, you're one to talk.” you yelled back at him. “You never changed, did you? You’re still an asshole prick that just wants a nice woman by his side to make him feel better about himself.”

“That’s not true!” he exclaimed.

“Oh really? Then tell me the real reason why you’re here?” you questioned looking at the man.

“As a matter of fact I’m taking my girlfriend here.” he replied with a smirk.

“Yeah, to break up with her?” you asked, shaking your head.

“How’d you know that?” He placed his hands on his hips.

“Because that’s what you did to the girl you dated before me, asshole.” you exclaimed.

“Well, why not after I break up with my current girl, you and I find a nice place to properly talk.” he smirked at you.

You walked closer to him and he smiled as he felt your chest against his. He looked down at your cleavage and back up to your face smiling even more. You put your hand on his shoulder smiling at him and that’s when you kneed him in the crotch.

“Go find someone else to feed your ego. I’m busy.” you said as you walked back to the restaurant and your boyfriend.

As you sat down on your seat, your boyfriend placed a kiss on your cheek. “Were you nice?” he asked, taking a sip of his wine.

“I tried to be.” you huffed as you looked out the window staring at your ex who laid on the ground in pain.

“Well, looks like I need to teach you some manners then.” he smirked.

“You sure do.” you smiled, winking back at him.

A/N: Ahhh hello!! How was that? I feel like this wasn’t my best but at the same time not bad. lol I literally have no clue how to write a bad bitch reader (because i ain’t one), but hopefully I did this request justice! Thank you for reading and lemme know what you though of this. Feedback is very much appreciated and lemme know if you wanna be tagged in my stuff!

Taglist: @lostinthoughtsandfeelings @sebtheromanianprince @aquabrie @who-the-hell-is-sebastianstan @anbrax5553 @wintersoldierissucharide @caplanbuckybarnes @miraclesoflove @kitkatd7 @saiyanprincessswanie @fandomsandxfiles @hailmary-yramliah @coffeebooksandfandom @thefallenbibliophilequote

^^please lemme know if you wanna be added/removed for future tags or dm me if I forgot you^^

#chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x reader #reader x chris evans #chris x reader #reader x chris #asshole evans au #reader insert

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alliterative-albatross · 3 years

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So, I sent you (@disgruntledspacedad) a pretty long ask a while ago (back when you had anon on) and I'm decently sure Tumblr ate it (or maybe you ignored it, in which case, feel free to ignore this one as well). But then I saw one of those "writers appreciate feedback no matter how long" posts, so I'm back here. Here is my mediocre attempt to rewrite my original review of your work. Bear in mind that English is not my first language, so if at any point my phrasing sounds weird to you, you know why. Mandatory disclaimer/apology: this might get a little too long 😅

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT

I remember being SO mad at myself for not finding this sooner. I binge read it one afternoon with no thoughts for any real life responsibilities I might have had (and no regrets). Javiears is one hell of an unconventional relationship in the beginning, and I really love what you did with them. The whole premise of your story is quite refreshing, and you somehow manage to convey the trust and mutual respect there two feel for one another without explicitly showing us the beginning of their "entanglement".

Also, fuck you for what you did to poor Emilio, that man was a saint and he deserved better! I honestly can't believe that I got so attached to a character that appeared so little in the story, but it happened, and his death kind of broke my heart.

But the Javiears reunion + mild confession was lovely, and felt completely deserved. And of course the sex scene. I won't lie, I expected a bit better from Javi there, but I did like how utterly /human/ it was. Capturing that humanity, the imperfections in each character is something you're really good at (more on that later).

AFTERSHOCKS

Ah, my emotionally constipated babies who really need to work out their communication issues. I do love them, though. And this short series did a really good job of delving a bit deeper into Ears's and Javi's psyche. Kudos to you for dealing with the medical "aftershocks" of living through an explosion AND using that experience to move your emotional plot forward. These two need to grow a lot before they can get to a stable point in their relationship, and you really manage to convey their insecurity and fear of commitment/intimacy while making it clear that they're in it for the long run and that theirs is a relationship that WILL work out so help them God.

IF I FALL

Ouch. Punch me in the gut while you're at it, why don't you?

But seriously, "If I Fall" is SO FUCKING GOOD. Don't get me wrong, it's angstier than an image of Jesus on the cross (don't judge me, it's Holy Week and I just got home from accompanying my grandma to church), but it somehow works beautifully. You, my dear, play heartstrings like they're a fucking guitar and I AM HERE FOR IT.

You're doing an amazing job at making me feel everything these characters are feeling, which is both awful (bc pain) and impressive.

Also, if anything happens to Ana I will cry, because she is adorable and wonderful and has suffered way too much already and really deserves a break and some cookies.

Also also, if anything happens to Ears I will cry, because she is badass and wonderful and has suffered way too much already and really deserves a break and some cookies.

Also also also, if anything happens to Javi I will cry, because he is loving and wonderful and has suffered way too much already and really deserves a break and some cookies.

Basically, I am really invested in the well-being of these characters and can't wait until they're happy and safe again (please tell me they will be, my heart can't handle much more pain).

A quick note on the angst complaints: yes, this story is way angstier than most other fics out there and it can be a bit too much at times, especially considering how many chapters of pain it's been. BUT it's obvious that "If I Fall" NEEDS this amount of angst to get where it's going, to send the message it wants to and to properly develop its characters. The pain is as important to this story as flour is to bread. You may not like eating flour on its own (I don't think anyone does), but you love bread (because bread is amazing) and you must recognize that bread NEEDS flour to work. It wouldn't be bread otherwise. And eating the flour as part of the bread even makes you like the flour because the bread is just DELICIOUS.

I fully understand and sympathize with the people who have elected to table "If I Fall" until it's completed so they can binge read it knowing there's a happy ending in sight, but in case you're feeling a bit self conscious about all the angst, please know that your story is beautiful not in spite of the pain, but rather /because of it/.

PS: No, I'm not high/drunk, I just really like bread

AUTHOR'S NOTES

Silly thing to comment on, I know, but I do feel like it's important that you know how useful your ANs have been. There are many details in the story that I simply wouldn't fully get without reading your comments at the end of each chapter, and I appreciate your writing a hell of a lot more knowing how deeply you understand and care for each one of your characters. Plus, it is obvious how much work you've put into researching a country and a time period that are (from what I gather) unfamiliar to you, and I really do believe you've done an amazing job of it.

JAVIER PEÑA

My boy. I love your characterization of this complicated character, and I have eagerly read each and every one of your headcanons about him. I can't really say if your version is fully faithful to the source material because it's been a while since I saw Narcos, but your Javi most definitely reads like a real person. He's fairly consistent as a character, and I feel like everything he does is perfectly natural for him to do as a character. He makes for an unconventional yet deeply interesting romantic lead, and so far I have thoroughly enjoyed all his POV chapters/scenes.

OCs

I know you've gotten some flack for making her into an OC halfway into the story, and while I get why the sudden change may have felt like a disappointment for some, I don't share that sentiment. I firmly believe that this fandom is unfairly harsh towards Original Characters and their creators, and I don't really understand why. Listen, I love Reader fics, and consume many Reader fics. I have read dozens, maybe even hundreds, and I can safely say that I've only ever "inserted" myself in approximately 10% of those stories. Reader characters are not as blank as their writers may want them to be. They can't be. They're characters, and character have personalities and moral values and senses of humor and a bunch of other things. Reader characters may not have a backstory or a physical description attached (and even that's not guaranteed), but they're still characters.

And on a more personal note, pretending they're actual blank slates is naive at best and insensitive at worst. Reader characters are American coded 99% of the time, and white coded 95% of the time. Not every readers is white nor American, even if that's the predominant demographic on Tumblr. When I read a JavixReader fic about a woman who speaks exactly zero Spanish, I know she's not me. The story may be beautifully written and have an amazing plot and character development, but the Reader *isn't me*. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, and some of my favorite xReader stories feature a "reader" who couldn't be more different from me, but it's something that enemies of OC fics should take into account. Particularly if they are white and/or American. But I digress.

HANNAH AARONS

Your character is amazing. She's strong, smart, confident, independent and an all-around badass. She gets kidnapped while pregnant and still focuses on problem solving and survival. But she's also overly guarded and mistrustful, and really needs to work on her communication skills. There are times when I absolutely love her and even admire her, and other times when I want to whack her with a slipper. She's no Mary Sue, but remains interesting and likeable throughout the story. She feels wholly human and real, and that's no easy task. I like her, I am invested in her, and I can't wait to see what's next for her. She's a compelling and three dimensional protagonist in a complex story who never fails to draw me in. I love her. She's your baby, and you should be proud of her.

Also, quick question about personality types: I know you've typed Javi as ESFP and Ears as ENTP (100% agree on both, btw), but have you given any thought to their enneagram types? I personally have always seen Ears as being somewhere on the thinking triad, maybe a 7 or even a 6w7, but I'm not too sure about Javi. 9w8 maybe? He could also be a 6w5 🤔

PARTING THOUGHTS

Basically, I love your story, your characters and your writing in general. You are a fantastic storyteller and wordsmith. You get into the heads of incredibly different characters personality-wise (Ears, Javi, Berna...) and manage to capture all of their complexities and quirks every single time. And it doesn't feel like it's something innate for you either. To me, it seems that you have put a lot of work and effort into understanding each and every one of your characters, who they are, why they do what they do and what they want. And let me tell you, all that effort has been more than worth it. "Better Love" is a fanfic, but it wouldn't be out of place in a regular bookstore, if I'm honest. I don't know what you do for a living or if you've ever considered writing professionally, but you clearly have the skills and the drive to create some masterpieces.

You are amazing and your writing is a gift. Thank you for sharing it with us, and have a nice day! ~ 🍪

My friend, I apologize for hoarding your first ask. I’ve been sitting on it because I’m not gonna lie, I enjoy going back and rereading it. It gave me a lot of comfort when I was in a pretty dark place, both personally and in regards to my writing, and I was reluctant to send it out into the the abyss of Tumblr where I might never see it again.

That’s not fair, though. You put just as much effort into sending me that review as I put into my writing, and I apologize for never responding to you.

Okay, anyway, so twice now, you’ve made me cry. In a good way, I promise!

I absolutely love your bread/flour metaphor. It made perfect sense. I want the emotional release of Javi and Hannah’s reunion to be earned, and in order to do that, the angst has to come first (there are also a few plot “ingredients” that have yet to make their appearances). Thank you very much for understanding that, and for voicing it so eloquently.

I appreciate your comments on my research and characterization. You’re correct that I’ve put a lot of time and effort into crafting a universe. In a lot of ways, I’m doing my best to stay true to the source material (regarding culture and timelines in particular), and in others, I’m branching into my own territory.

On that note, I’ve never once regretted fully embracing Hannah Aarons’ identity as an OC. She’s stayed consistent in my mind from the beginning, and it was a relief to finally share my vision of her with the audience. And for the record, I totally agree with you regarding “reader” characters. Every reader insert echoes the perspective of their author, no matter how vague the physical description. I can only imagine how grating that must be from the perspective of a non-white, non-american reader. Thank you so much for sharing your insight! I will certainly keep it in mind the next time I write a “reader insert” fic.

Okay, enneagrams! I am much less familiar with enneagram than I am MBTI, but I agree 110% that Javi is a 9 with a strong 8 wing. I waffled back and forth on Ears a little, but eventually landed on 8w7 for her. It came down to the eight’s deepest fear, which is being controlled. That’s Ears all over, and the fact that she and Javi share that eight willfulness means that they might butt heads a little, which also seems very appropriate for them. Big thanks to @remusstark for her insight into the eight frame of mind - our conversations helped solidify my decision on this. :)

Anyway, I’m just rambling now. The big take-away point that I want you to get is that I am so, so grateful to you, both for your insightful feedback and your dedication in making sure that I actually saw it. You are an absolute gem and a deep thinker, Cookie-Anon, and if you ever feel like sliding into my DM’s, I’d welcome the opportunity to get to know you better.

Mad love and soft hugs,

~ Jay

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kaypeace21 · 5 years

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something i noticed, during the s3 byler argument, Mike says “El’s not stupid, it’s not MY fault you don’t like girls.” Mike’s “it’s not my fault” doesn’t fit as a retort, the theme of his retort should be defending El. He should have said “it’s not HER fault you don’t like girls”. Knowing there were other versions of that line the writers must have consciously chosen to leave this one in, knowing how it could be interpreted. anyway, do you have any idea why mike even said that line?

Yes, I have talked about it -here (in my long ‘why Mike is gay post’). But since so many people misinterpret the meaning of Mike’s words- might as well do a shorter/more brief version .And do a post focusing on it. HE’S SAYING THIS TO HIMSELF!

First some background

Mike DOES NOT think Will is gay. Dustin foreshadows their fight in s1 saying “Dustin: “He’s just jealous.” Mike: “What?” Dustin: “Sometimes your total obliviousness just blows my mind?” Dustin: “ What matters is, he’s your best friend. And then this girl shows up… and all you ever want to do is spend time with her!” Mike: “that’s not true!”

Dustin: “Yes it is! And you know it. And he knows it. But no one ever says anything until you’re both start… yelling at each other like goblins with intelligence scores of 0. And now everything is weird”

Mike: “He’s not my best friend! … I mean he is. But so are you.”

He won’t let himself consider that Will could be gay because then it would be harder to pretend he isn’t gay himself . That it isn’t just a weird phase that he’ll grow out of. We see that throughout the show Mike is projecting his feelings for Will on to El . Who in s1 was described by 5 characters as looking like a boy (and specifically like Will, by 3 characters ). There’s just way too many examples of him projecting to list here. But s3 we see Mike is trying to mimic romantic moments between him and Will (from s2) to El (in s3). In order to transfer his romantic feelings for Will on to El. The “blank makes you crazy” vs “crazy together”, the shed scenes of “most important thing” vs “the best thing I’ve ever done”,etc.

The difference between past seasons though, is that Mike is now conscious that he’s doing this. The more feminine El gets- the harder for him it is to pretend. Especially now that they’re going through puberty- and the physical differences between boys and girls is becoming more prominent. We see this in the first ep of s3. I talked about it more here, but the Duffers use music with all the characters to convey plot points or the emotions of the characters. One example is when Mike forces Will to dance with a girl so he ‘fakes a smile’.

So yes, the fact that the very first lyrics that play when we see mileven kiss for the first time is “Just a little uncertainty can bring you down”- reflects Mike’s true feelings.And we know this is how Mike (not El) feels about their relationship because he begins to sing the song right after this lyric.The song is even from the album titled “boy in the box”. AKA: Mike is in the closet

“And nobody wants to know you now. And nobody wants to show you how.So if you’re lost and on your own. You can never surrender.” He fears that if he isn’t straight everyone he cares about will abandon him, and that he’d be lost and the only one ‘like this’ -all alone.But he can’t ‘surrender’ the false-idea of being in love with El (out of fear). This is the rural Indiana in the 80s- at the height of the aids epidemic. People on the news said gay people were being rightfully punished with the ‘gay cancer’ (aids). They equated being gay with being a perv, p*d*phile, murderer, or mentally ill. Churches said you’d ‘burn in hell’. In rural areas people would form gangs and murder people they thought were gay. Of course Mike is terrified and wants to be straight! His parents in s2 were Reagan supporters. And Reagan was notoriously homophobic. He’s probably afraid his parents will hate him, kick him out, or that someone will kill him or he’ll die from aids by simply kissing a boy.

We see Mike is doing his own f-ed up form of conversion therapy. He kisses El but he puts on the wall a drawing of Will so he can look at it while he kisses her. Probably hoping to transfer his romantic feeling for Will on to her.

Like that’s Will! He has light brown hair (not black) and Will is the only one associated with fire and has drawn himself with fire in the past. And Will even overlaps with the rainbow drawing that reads “mike” before we see the mileven kiss. It was intentional.

So when Will Says “you’re ruining everything (their relationship) .And for what?! So you can swap spit with some stupid girl.”

This infuriates Mike because he thinks swapping spit with El is the best way to save their relationship! And he’s been trying to ‘fix himself’ so Will doesn’t hate him- and it hasn’t been working, to Mike’s frustration. So he screams “El’s not stupid, it’s not my fault you don’t like girls!” because he’s projecting. And although, he loves Will… a part of him probably is a bit angry that he’s making him feel this way.

Mike never actually says to El’s face that he loves her- he even says during his fake-confession “[old people] say it”.And later Mike apologizes to El and says “sorry, I sound like a [7 year old].” Aka the number Will rolled in s1. Right after he discusses d&d with Will and talks about seeing both of them for the Hollidays. So it’s telling that after he says “El’s not stupid . it’s not my fault you don’t like girls” (to himself). He immediately regrets yelling at Will. He even closes his eyes and takes a breath before continuing. And apologizes, by giving a heteronormative answer of:

“I’m not trying to be a jerk, but [we’re not kids anymore]. What did you think, really?! that we’d never get girlfriends. That we’d just sit in my basement and play games for the rest our lives?”

Mike is yelling this at himself to keep his feelings for Will under control.El is an idea to Mike about what adulthood is- which is why he doesn’t really defend el (and his ‘love’ for her) but just talks about “girlfriends” in an abstract way. This was essentially Mike telling himself- he’s NOT allowed to just be with Will and never have a gf. He has to grow out of his ‘childish feelings’ for Will- before it’s too late, because being a gay man is dangerous. That’s why when the camera is on Mike (when he looks back a the byers house -and they only show Will and Mike). The dialogue is “But I know you’re getting older, growing, changing. I guess, if I’m being really honest, that’s what scares me. I don’t want things to change.”He doesn’t want things to change (and his feelings for Will to evolve into love, because that means Mike has to admit he’s gay and accept his future as a gay man-which at the time, didn’t seem very bright). They both are afraid of the future because of this. Mike tries to act like a ‘straight-adult’ and Will tries to revert back into his childhood because of this.

Mike also mentions “games’ because d&d is a symbol of byler’s romantic relationship. He’s just pretending to not enjoy the d&d game. Mike says they have to get girlfriends and they can’t play games for the rest of their lives. But that’s what Mike wants- he just wants to be with Will for the rest of his life (playing games) without either of them having girlfriends. Because, we see Mike never took any of Will’s d&d art off his walls.Even though he changed his poster (from the same wall that had will’s drawings on it) Mike couldn’t remove any of Will’s d&d art. It was an act - which is why he was upset (in the last episode) when Will was donating the game, and why during the Hopper speech, it pans to Mike as Hopper says “I miss playing board games every night.”

Mike even has a binder filled with every d&d drawing Will has ever given him.

In the pilot, they even say Will uses d&d to “escape” his insecurities about his sexuality “like mike” & Mike uses d&d to “escape” his insecurities about not having a gf. * And no, dustin & Lucas didn’t use d&d to “escape” anything- in the pilot script.

And right before Mike says the famous “crazy together”line it zooms in on Mike’s d&d set.

The “crazy together” scene is romantic since both Mike & Flo both equate love making you ‘crazy’. Mike saying “it makes you crazy” and Flo saying saying in s1 “ only love makes you crazy and that damn stupid”).

(x)(x)

Mike is lying about his feelings for El- and El is just confused about her feelings for Mike. The only one’s with mutual feelings for Mike is Will! Will even has a breakdown and goes ‘crazy’ after seeing a pic of them the night they promised to go crazy together - and then Will repeatedly calls himself ‘stupid’ . Because this is when he realizes and admits to himself he’s in love with Mike. And so he grabs a bat (that his dad- who called him a ‘queer’ taught him to use) and destroys castle Byers in a fit of anger and self-hate. That fight was what caused Will to realize his feelings for Mike and the jealousy he had been feeling were because he was in love with Mike. When Mike asks “what did you think, really? That we’d never get girlfriends… play games for the rest of our lives?”

Will is 100% honest a says brokenly “yeah. I guess I did” And then says angrily “I really did!” . Even if both don’t understand the gravity of their words in that moment Will was honest- he doesn’t want to ever have a girlfriend he just wants to be with Mike for the rest of his life. And Mike, who assumes Will is straight, is shocked that this conversation upset Will. Or that he would disagree with his words.

And again their last conversation (about d&d is very telling and is foreshadowing). What Will meant when he said , “I’ll just use yours when I come back- I mean… if WE still wanna play”. Is essentially foreshadowing that the ball is in Mike’s court. If he wants to be with Will for the rest of his life he has to initiate it and prove he loves Will after pretending for so long to love El, instead.

gif credit: first 2 gifs ampwn98 , 3th gif by janebycrs, 5th gif Cath-avery , 4 & 6th gifs mine

#byler #byeler #anti mileven

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heartthrobcityimagine · 6 years

Text

Who Is This??/ Part 8/ Noah Centineo

A/N: I kind of got writer’s block writing this. Hope it still turned out pretty well. Let me know!

Warnings: As always Language, Violence, etc...

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Where we left off last part!:

Your body falls to the ground, a throbbing ache sets in to your head from hitting the pavement. You tried to suck in air but a searing pain throughout your abdomen was preventing you from doing so. Your vision was going in and out, you could hear muffled grunts from the fight going on just beside you.

You hear a muffled scream for your name just as everything goes black and your body limp. =============================================================

*Beep* *Beep* *Beep*

God, what the hell was that annoying ass noise?

You try to open your eyes to find the source of the irritating sound but you couldn't. It felt like you had super glued them together. You groan in frustration.

Why was this so hard? Where am I? Oh fuck did I die? Wait why would that happen? What the hell?!?

*BEEP BEEP BEEP* BEEP* *BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP*

" Why is her heart rate increasing?" Who the fuck was that? What is going on?

*BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP*

SOMEONE PLEASE STOP THAT FUCKING NOISE!

If I could just open my damn eyes I'd stop it myself! Fuck it, I'll just pry them open. You try to move your hands but something rough around your wrist keeps you from doing so. What the actual fuck? You begin to panic.

*BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEE-BEEE-BEE-BEEEP"

"Heart rate climbing, 187." WHO THE HELL WAS THAT?!?!?

" 200mg Pentobarbital NOW!" A deep voice shouts. Pentowhat?? Seriously? Who the hell are these people. Your thoughts start to dull and you start to fade out.

"Oh my god! What's going on? What's happening?!" Wait, you knew that voice. You try to move your hands, kick your feet, fighting trying to come out of whatever state you were in.

"HER HANDS! THEIR MOVING!"

" It's probably just a side effect from the medication, sir, please calm down."

That voice, that beautiful calming voice. It sounded so familiar but you couldn't quite put your finger on it. Couldn't quite put your finger on anything because you couldn't move the damn things!

Your mind goes blank and you fade out of consciousness.

*BEEP* *BEEP* BEEP* BEEP*

That fucking noise was back. You didn’t know how much time has passed but your brain felt foggy. You try to blink this time and are shocked when a bright ray of light slips through. You slam them shut. A pounding ache rushes to your head. Something in your throat causes you to choke. Your eyes blink rapidly light flooding into them, hands thrashing against the bindings. You try to gasp for air as beeping and shrieking alarms go off beside you.

" (Y/N), calm down or I’m going to have to sedate you." You clamp your eyes shut, the burning in your throat increases.

" Ms. (Y/L/N). I'm going to remove the intubation but I need you to lay still or we could harm your lungs or voice box."

You try to relax your body, clenching your eyes you feel something being pulled from your throat. Once it's removed you immediately start coughing. Your eyes flying open. There were 2 nurses clambering around you, one releases your hands from the binds as the other hands you a cup of water. Gulping it down you sigh, water had never tasted so good.

"What happened? Why am I in here?" You manage to whisper. Your throat was incredibly scratchy and hurt to talk.

" I'll go grab your family and the doctor so they can explain everything, okay?" You nod your head as they leave the room.

Your eyes glance around the glaring white hospital room , flowers and ballons on every surface you could see. Who had sent all these?

You hearing shuffling from behind your closed door and the knob turns. You see a flash of blonde shoot through the door and arms fling around you.

" I swear to god, you are going to be the damn death of me." Jace pulls back and glares at you. You shrug your shoulders and give him an innocent look. Shaking his head he squeezes you one more time before stepping back.

Someone jumps in Jace's place and wraps their arms around you before you have a change to look up. Brunette hair covers their face and yours but the scent of lemoncello and citrus fills your nose.

"Mom." You whisper.

You don't know if she's ignorning you or if she just didn't hear you just wrap your arms around her and let her hold on to you for a few minutes. You feel tiny drops on your shoulder and hear her sniffling. Tears spring to your eyes, you hate that she was crying. You always hated when she would cry.

"Momma, I'm okay really. It's okay. "

"No," she sobs. "It's not okay, you could've died."

You pull back and look at her confused.

" What? Mom what do you mean?" she opens her mouth to answer when a grey headed, older looking man knocks on your room door as he enters.

"Hello miss (Y/L/N). I am Dr. Pravesh. I have been over seeing your care." You nod your head.

He gives you you a smile and continues, " You've been here for a little over a week now." Your eyes go so wide they may pop out of the sockets.

" A week? I'm sorry but how is that possible?"

" Miss (Y/L/N), what is the last thing you remember?"

You try to think back, " The last thing I remember is seeing Tye at the performance and rushing off stage. After that it''s a little hazy."

Your mother bursts into tears again, Jace desperately tries to console her. Confused you ask, " What exactly happened? Why was I here that long?" Your throat ached.

"Well, as I understand it a young man attacked you at your vehicle, lovely fellow over here called the ambulance for you just in time, helped save your life.” He motions to a blushing Jace.

“ You had quite a few injuries. You suffered a stab wound to your abdomen wall, thankfully it was primarily fleshy so no vital organs were injured. You had major lacerations that covered most of your body from your fall. Your windpipe was injured when he tried to choke you, which is why it is hard for you to talk, that, and the intubation. You suffered a concussion when you fell and a skull fracture that caused some swelling, we've kept you in a medically induced coma as you had to be resuscitated when you first arrived and to reduce swelling and overload on your heart. We were trying to wean you off yesterday but your heart rate was too rapid, so this afternoon we let your body slowly wean itself. If the next day or two goes well then you should be out of here by the end of the week. We will run another MRI and CT and some blood work to double check things."

“ I remember not being able to open my eyes yesterday, I could hear but I couldn’t open my eyes. I moved my hands.”

“Yes, it is very common for most people to not be able to open their eyes but hear when first being weaned off medications. It also probably felt as though your were moving your hands a lot but on our side it may have just been small twitches, again that is also common. Do you have any questions for me?”

You were trying to wrap your head around what he was saying as flashbacks started to comeback. You shake your head no and he turns to leave asking your mom to speak to her outside as another flash of that night hits you.

You were up again the car, Tye's hand on your throat, someone saved you. Someone punched him and fought with him. A loud screeching noise as Jace drags a chair to your beside drags your out of your flashback and has you raining both of you eyebrows in question.

" What? You think I'm going to leave your side after all that shit? You are sadly mistaken." Oh lord, 24/7 Jace... You didn’t know about that one. You give him a small smile. You were so thankful for him though and wouldn’t trade him for a minute.

" Jace, thank you for saving me that night." He blushes, scoffing.

" Whatcha talkin' about babe? All I did was call 911 and scream the whole time." Your head tilts to the side in confusion, wait, if he just called 911 then who...

" Who fought Tye then? I know I wasn't imagining that?" He's silent for a moment.

" OH my god, I wasn't imagining it was I?!?"

He lets out a deep breath, " No, no you weren't."

"Then who the fuck was it Jace?" you say irritated that he wouldn't just tell you who had been your savior that night.

" Well, promise you won't be mad?"

" I can't promise that. Depends on what you did."

His eyebrows raise at your attitude, you couldn't help it, you were annoyed.

" Pinky promise or I'm. NOT. saying." an aggravated snarl comes from your mouth as you look at him ridiculously. He was holding his pinky up expectantly. There was an intense stare off between you.

" Fucking FINE!" You say exasperated and link your pinky with his. " I promise, now who was it Jace?!"

" Okay, well let me start off by apologizing. I really didn't know this was going to happen, I mean who would've known that your ass would be in a coma, in the hospital..."

"JACE, get to the point please!"

" Right, sorry. Anyway, I may or may not have, leaning towards the may side, have mentioned to our mutual friend, well in your case... nevermind, I may have mentioned that you would be performing at the music festival, at which this person may or may not have shown up. "

"Jace, would you please just tell me...." You were beyond frustrated at this point. You had a good idea but you were waiting for him to confirm it.

" It was Noah okay! There, damn."

Once again Jace was trying to play matchmaker.

" Jace.... I swear, when I get out of this hospital bed, you are toast. You and I are going to have a looooooooooong talk about boundaries."

The rapid beeping of the heart monitor matched the pounding in your chest, Noah was the one to save you from Tye. You felt like shit, you had pushed him away and he didn't care, he still protected you.

Wait, if Noah was the one to fight off Tye...... Where was he?

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Alrighty babes! There we go! Part 8! SWEAR TO GOD Noah will be the death of me. My heart can’t handle his instagram, also can you imagine him getting in a fight over you? Dear GAAH! Also, HE IS BACK!!! SO next part we will definitely be seeing more of our favorite boy ;)

As always let me know whatcha think!

#noah centineo #noah centineo imagine #noah x reader #noah centineo x reader #noah x reader imagine #to all the boys i've loved before #noah #centineo #peter x reader #peter kavinsky x reader #peter kavinsky #peter kavinsky imagine #peter #tatbilb #sbial #jamey #part8 #Who Is this??

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monotype-on-phantom · 7 years

Text

Neither did we, Danny.

Because that aspect of the episode lasted for approximately three minutes and 45 seconds. I timed it.

You guys ready for complaining? Because I have a lot of complaining to do.

I don’t hate this episode, let me just clarify that. I like it a lot more than the stuff I disliked in Splitting Images. It’s got some good moments and ideas. My problem with it is more similar to my problems with Prisoners of Love.

Three minutes. And 45 seconds. Dedicated to the aspect of the episode that makes up the title. After that, Danny gets his powers back, goes to fight Desiree, and then Sam wishes everything back to normal. Sam and Danny fighting? That lasted 11 minutes and 15 seconds. That lasted almost three times as long as the Memory Blank. (This episode should’ve been called Teenagers Argue.)

That’s a lot of wasted potential, and like Prisoners of Love, it’s because there is so much being crammed into one episode. They try to cover Danny’s origin, build up tension between Sam and Danny, have the amnesia bit, have Sam succeed in getting Danny’s attention, introduce some new things about Desiree, and resolve everything and it just gets too cluttered.

To begin with, the fight between Sam and Danny got the most time dedicated to it out of anything in the episode, and yet it’s probably the most unpleasant part of the whole thing. At first, it’s okay. We’ve got Danny getting invited to Paulina’s birthday party, and so he breaks his promise to go to a movie with Sam. It’s not nice, but it’s understandable and in line with Danny’s character. But then, halfway in, we’ve got Danny saying stuff like “I wouldn’t have needed help if it wasn’t for you in the first place” and blaming her for all sorts of problems from the previous episodes, some of which were actually his fault.

Immediately afterward, Danny feels guilty and tries to go after her to apologize, but the way this happens feels…awkward. I mean, Sam’s clearly upset about not getting to go to the movie, but Danny and Tucker begged her to let them go to the party instead. She begrudgingly said okay because she cares about them that much. I don’t know about you, but when my loved ones give up something important to them for me, I don’t start acting like a jerk afterward.

I’m not saying this isn’t a thing that can happen, but Danny doesn’t do stuff like this anywhere else? He gets angry and can be a jerk when he’s upset with someone (see My Brother’s Keeper), but the way he’s acting toward Sam just, like I said, comes out of nowhere.

Sam has this problem, too, though less so. She’s usually actively speaking against Danny using his powers for petty things, but then she’s suddenly demanding he smash some trucks because they’re bad for the environment. She’s never pressured him to do stuff like that before. In Splitting Images, she goes to smuggle frogs out of the school lab by herself. In One of a Kind, she tries to get Sampson freed civilly, though she makes mistakes. She doesn’t say “Danny, steal Sampson and take him to the wild for me.”

The random uses of “wish” from her are also odd. The first wish is fine, the third one, while harsh, is understandable, but the second one? The wording is just odd, and was clearly a way to try and introduce more conflict.

This might sound like I’m nitpicking, but remember the last time Desiree was the antagonist?

That episode was about Danny fighting with one of his friends, too, and that one actually felt natural and wasn’t too cluttered. Danny’s using his powers constantly and even unnecessarily, and Tucker’s getting the short end of the stick as a result. He gets mad, but he bottles it up and grumbles about it to himself, which results in a wish that almost destroys their friendship. It’s understandable, and neither of them are entirely at fault. At the end of it all, they both apologize and make up.

In Memory Blank, it is literally just Danny being a jerk out of nowhere (Tucker, too, but a bit less forcefully.) This is the second time the two of them have suddenly been assholes for no reason (the first being in Teacher of the Year), and just like I said back then, if this is a thing that has happened multiple times, there’s no way Sam would put up with it. And it’s pretty much always her. I know Danny and Tucker are teenage boys and they’ll make teenage boy mistakes, but there’s a difference between mistakes and just being mean. Episodes like this make me question why Sam’s friends with them. If you stack up all the moments like this episode, it really adds up.

Normally, though, they all seem to care about each other a lot. I just can’t see Danny and Tucker being such jerks to their best friend so often.

You know what we needed? An episode about Danny and Tucker trying to do something just for Sam. Sam does a lot for the boys, and they do a lot for each other, but I’m hard pressed to find an episode outside of Parental Bonding that has the boys going “we should do something nice for Sam, too.”

Maybe it’s just my personal feelings, but the more I realize how much this was a thing, the more it bothers me. I know this is canon, but I’ve never seen Danny and Tucker like this. They’re usually really nice kids. They put a lot on the line for their loved ones. I feel like the show way too often leaned on this ongoing joke of “Sam’s always right and the boys are idiots who don’t listen to her.” Which is fine. Have the boys do dumb boy stuff. In a lot of episodes, it’s cute to see them bonding over their mutual teenage boy interests. I just wish the writers cared more about showing why they meant so much to Sam, too.

Which brings me to another thing, because I am sooo not done yet.

The fact that the fight is unpleasant and takes up so much time takes away from what could’ve been a really emotional episode. Like I said at the beginning, we really don’t know how different Danny’s life would’ve been without Sam. We don’t even get to see four minutes of that.

You know what would’ve been cool? Focusing the majority of the episode on how these kids became friends in the first place. An episode from another show comes to mind.

This may be an unfair comparison since A Sitch in Time is a TV movie while Memory Blank was a regular episode, but it also had a million things going on. You don’t even find out who the main antagonist is until, what, two thirds of the way through the movie? Heck, in a lot of ways, this episode combines ideas from Memory Blank and The Ultimate Enemy, and it still managed to leave a significant emotional impact.

I understand that there’s only so much that can be accomplished with a low budget, and DP never did get any actual movies, but when 50% of an episode is dedicated to two characters fighting, 4 minutes to what they lose if they lose their friendship, and the rest to random jokes…that’s a huge waste.

Much like Prisoners of Love, I feel like this episode’s ideas should’ve been rearranged and split into two different episodes.

We’ve all expressed our desire for an actual origin episode, and yeah, we really should’ve gotten one. The “origin story” in this episode is pretty rushed and lame, and honestly I feel like I got more from the opening rap than the new bits thrown in here. If you want to establish that Sam was crucial to Danny getting his powers, fine, but give us an actual episode dedicated to that. Don’t just pull that out of nowhere and never address it again.

The second episode should’ve been about the Memory Blank plot. While I dislike the execution, it’s a good idea. We just need to see more than four minutes of it. Really, just about nothing’s changed from what we can see. The only difference from before is that Danny doesn’t have ghost powers or know who Sam is. We don’t even see Valerie hanging out with the popular kids again, which she should be since Cujo and Danny never would’ve trashed her dad’s lab. The fact that she was forgotten like that shows just how little thought was actually put into this idea, and it really sucks.

It would’ve been really cool to see what a world where these two never met would’ve been like. It would’ve been cool to see what life without Danny Phantom would’ve been like. Instead, we get over 11 minutes of bickering, four minutes of exploring this alternate world, and then some jokes.

This post has gone on for long enough, and I’ve got more to say, so I think I’ll end it here. I think I’ve made my point.

Again, I don’t hate this episode. If I hated it, I’d completely skip over it like I plan on skipping Livin’ Large. It just could’ve been so, so much better, and I’m disappointed.

#danny phantom #plot #memory blank

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jugandbettsdetectiveagency · 7 years

Text

The Serpent and The Swan - Ch.4

A longer chapter for you this time, I’ve been trying to keep them from being too short this time around! Thank you so much for all the lovely comments and support for this fic, they really are what keep me going especially with writer’s block. I think sometimes people are less inclined to leave response for authors they think have more followers because someone else will do it, but that’s not the case and any feedback is so appreciated you can’t even imagine. I’ve been terrible at replying to them recently but just know each and every one means so much to me, makes me write even faster, and I’ll try and be better with replies from now on - enjoy!

Ch.1 / Ch.2 / Ch. 3 / Read on AO3

Cool fingers closed around Betty’s wrist in a vicelike grip, a small yelp escaping her lips. Alice didn’t turn to look at her as she tugged her daughter roughly to her side, instead plastering a mild smile across her face as she looked out over the celebrations.

“Mother, you’re hurting me,” Betty whispered, trying not to let the discomfort show on her face. Her words only succeeded in getting Alice to tighten her hold.

“I’m going to be having words with Master Kevin about his designs,” the Queen murmured threateningly. Betty ducked her head, heart hammering beneath her barely concealed chest. “I saw you talking to Prince Forsythe.” The abrupt shift in conversation startled her. “What are you impressions of him?” Betty couldn’t be sure but she swore she could hear a lilt in her mother’s voice that hadn’t been there for quite some time, a tinge of nervousness that sounded so out of place upon the lips of Alice Cooper.

“He seems like a Serpent,” Betty replied monotonously, unable to keep her frustrations at bay. She knew now that there was a part of her that still desperately clung to the hope that this boy would be nothing like the history he came from. Deep down Betty had fantasised that the prince would be kind and understanding, that they could share in their mutual unhappiness at being forced together against their will and find a peaceful harmony in the coupling. Unsurprisingly, it seemed she had been wrong.

Alice sighed, dropping her daughter’s wrist. Betty immediately cradled the joint, rubbing the feeling back into her skin. She regarded the older woman’s expression carefully. There was something akin to disappointment settled there and the young girl couldn’t reason why. In the time it took her to blink it was gone, replaced by her usual blank canvas.

“Give it time, Elizabeth.” A hint of softness still invaded her tone; it was the closest Betty was going to get to an apology for being forced into this marriage, she realised. She nodded, not trusting her voice. Alice left her with that, floating back towards the lake’s edge where Hal was conversing with some members of the court.

Betty fought the urge to run, locking her legs before they could betray her. All of a sudden her favourite place in the whole world had turned into a personal hell. The colours became too bright, swirling into a mess of rusted browns and blood-curling crimsons. The sounds were too loud, Betty feeling as if the orchestra was playing inside of her head rather than beside it. She clenched her eyes shut, balling her fists as the world began to spin beneath her feet. She needed to ground herself in the moment, keep a steady façade in place before everything crashed around her. She pulled in a deep breath through her nose, the scent of roses becoming sickening all at once, too heavy in the hot summer air. Her throat constricted, chest rising quickly as she struggled to breathe.

“Princess Elizabeth!” The cheerful voice snapped her out of her trance, eyes springing open while her fists relaxed. Betty could feel the damp seep of blood droplets beginning to trickle down her palms. In lieu of wiping away the evidence of her weakness on her pretty gown, Betty clasped her hands behind her back.

“Lady Selina, how lovely to see you,” she greeted with as much pluck as she could muster, returning the woman’s kisses to her cheeks. The woman of gentry smiled at her, her auburn curls and turquoise gown shining in the lamplight.

“You’ve really outdone yourself this year; the decorations are so beautiful. And have you tried some of Mrs Fitz’ pond pudding? It’s to die for! The pastry alone…” Lady Selina rambled on, the dulcet tones of her voice fading into the background. Betty was grateful for the interruption, using the conversation as white noise to settle her pounding heart and soothe her throbbing head. She was well versed in the practice of nodding and humming to benign conversation.

“I’ve heard he’s quite a sight for sore eyes.” The shift in topic jolted Betty back to the present, eyes refocusing on the sly smirk that was gracing the lady’s features.

“I’m sorry?” Betty asked, quirking a delicate brow.

“Your betrothed, Prince Forsythe. I know quite a few young ladies in the aristocracy that would love to set their sights on him, and then some!” she chimed, placing a dainty hand in front of her pursed lips as a quiet giggle slipped from them, like she had just implied something outrageous. Betty bit back an unladylike scoff.

“Are you sure some already haven’t?” she said, some bitterness seeping into her tone. Lady Selina blanched, suddenly looking rather uncomfortable with the direction the talk was heading in.

“Oh… well, not that I’m aware of, Your Highness,” she stuttered. “I didn’t mean to imply… I was only saying…” she continued, worry clouding her usually flawless features. Betty sighed, her eyes softening at the woman’s panic.

“I didn’t mean to frighten you,” she consoled, hoping some of her nerves would fade. Betty was sick of being treated like a plaything by her family, but then like a fragile doll by her ‘friends’. She knew it wasn’t their fault; it was engrained in most people to be nothing but placating to the monarchs. Either that or suffer some potentially dire consequences. It only served to add another thing to the list of reasons Betty wished she were Polly right now. “He is very handsome,” she said truthfully, her eyes scanning the crowds of her own accord, subconsciously searching for a flash of copper alongside that of dark ebony. Something akin to jealously tickled the edge of her mind. Betty pushed it aside quickly. “I just don’t think he has a particularly nice countenance,” she finished, turning back to Lady Selina with downturned eyes.

“He seems quite charming from here.” The light-hearted words had Betty looking up once more, following the direction of Selina’s gaze.

She instantly found him this time, the sheer light radiating from his form making her wonder why it had taken her so long before. He was crouched low to the ground, balancing on the toes of his dress shoes, as he reached up and chucked a little girl in a violet dress under the chin. He whispered something to her, as if telling her a deep secret. The small child giggled, launching herself at the prince, midnight ringlets bouncing beneath her small, golden tiara as she wrapped her chubby arms around his neck. He stood up, swinging the princess around until Betty swore the chime of her laughter rang out louder and more joyful than that of all the attendants and the music put together.

Prince Forsythe looked entirely different whilst wearing a smile. Betty couldn’t believe it was the same formal, sullen man she’d met just minutes ago in the shadows of the lake. With his cheeks lifted and his teeth glinting he almost appeared content and, dare she say it, approachable. It was not a look she saw worn by any of the other Serpents in attendance. Instead, the eyes of the distinctly dark men dotted about the courtyard were predatory and calculating.

As if by their own accord her feet carried her closer to the pair, abandoning Lady Selina as her ears strained to catch some of their words drifting over the raucous.

“Are you enjoying the festival, Jellybean?” Prince Forsythe asked once he had stopped spinning long enough for the princess to pull back and look at him. Somewhere in the back of her mind Betty recalled someone telling her the prince had a sister – Princess Thia, if she remembered correctly. She hadn’t known how much younger she would be, nor whether she would even be accompanying them on this trip. Her forehead creased at the unusual nickname, the syllables sounding strange to her, but she could clearly hear the affection laced behind the word.

“Yes,” Jellybean nodded, pressing a tiny hand to Prince Forsythe’s cheek, grown round with his grin. He turned his face to kiss her palm where it lay, before bending down to drop her back to the ground. His grin faltered as he caught the eye of a Serpent lurking at the edge of the crowd.

“Go on, there are some other little girls over there,” he told her, pointing towards the table of food by the right wing of the castle. Jellybean’s eyes lit up as she raced over the cobblestone, introducing herself to the other children with the confidence only a child possesses. The prince stood looking after her fondly, his mouth caught in a faint smile though he seemed troubled.

“She looks just like you,” Betty found herself saying. He startled, unaware of her presence so close by. He flicked his gaze between the two princesses, shrugging nonchalantly.

“We take after our mother,” he said, his voice sounding slightly thicker than it had before. Despite her earlier feelings of hostility Betty’s caring nature made her soften.

“I heard she passed away some time ago; I’m sorry for your loss,” she offered her condolences, noting he wouldn’t meet her saddened eyes. Even with all her faults, Betty couldn’t imagine life without her mother.

“It was years ago, we’ve managed,” he replied with a hardened voice. Something about his stance made Betty feel as if ‘managed’ was a bit of a stretch. She opened her mouth to console the boy further when the distinct chime of silverware against silverware cut her off. The din quietened down until it was only a dull hum, everyone turning to where the King and Queen were standing on a raised stage, accompanied by King Forsythe. His eyes locked with Betty’s, his unwavering grin causing an uneasy feeling to creep beneath her skin.

“Ladies and Gentlemen,” Hal began, addressing the crowd with raised arms. “We would like to thank you for providing us with your company on this most joyous of occasions. We come together today to thank the forces of nature for gifting us with such a flourishing harvest,” Betty saw the muscle in her mother’s jaw tighten discreetly. It was something that happened whenever Alice had to bite her tongue against her husband’s lies.

Perhaps the harvest wasn’t as plentiful as she’d been led to believe, Betty thought. It wouldn’t be the first time that her parents had kept the details of their struggling faction from their children. She glanced over towards the prince, still standing to her left, biting her lip in contemplation; there was probably more to this match than she’d taken the time to think about. Guilt swept through her at the memory of her churlish behaviour earlier that week. She was being selfish. Of course there was to be a reason for such an unconventional tie. Her faction must be in dire need. How could she be so naïve?

Acid churned in her stomach as she averted her attention back to her father’s speech, his words flooding back into her ears.

“And not only is the Solstice reason to gather this year. We must also celebrate a new union between our factions as we work towards a more cohesive future in our lands. To Prince Forsythe and Princess Elizabeth, we extend a hearty congratulations on your engagement,” Hal finished with a grand gesture towards the couple. Betty felt the prince stiffen beneath the attention as more and more eyes turned to face them. She dropped her shoulders, tilting her chin upwards in the way her mother was gesturing for her to do, before taking a few steps closer to Prince Forsythe and wrapping her arm delicately around the crook of his elbow.

He jumped, looking from her touch to her face, eyes wide. She smiled at him, what she hoped was reassuringly, before turning her expression on the crowd. Shock mixed with apprehension was what greeted her, something she assumed she’d have to get used to on the arm of a Serpent prince.

“They will now lead us in this next dance,” Hal announced, signalling for the orchestra to resume playing.

Betty couldn’t help but laugh at Forsythe’s horrified expression as she led the frozen prince into the centre of the courtyard. His jaw was locked, and she could see his pulse thudding beneath the tanned skin of his neck as she gripped his hand, feeling his settle on her waist so lightly it was barely there.

“Not one for dancing?” she teased as they counted out the beat before taking their first steps. He offered her a withering stare.

“Not in front of an audience,” he mumbled, glancing warily around them at the crowd, his grip on her hand tightening. Her heart fluttered in sympathy, momentarily forgetting their earlier frosty exchange.

“Hey, just look at me. Whenever I get nervous I find focusing on my partner the easiest way to forget people are watching,” she supplied, the corners of her mouth tilting upwards kindly. He took a breath, eyes locking with the emerald orbs before him, the rest of the party fading out slowly. Betty caught sight of the little princess watching them curiously.

“You and your sister seem very close,” she observed, nodding in her direction briefly. Jughead’s shoulders lost some of their tension at the mention of Jellybean.

“We are. We’re… we’re all each other has,” he said cryptically. Betty nodded in understanding, not needing him to explain. She knew what it was like to grow up with parents who were less than present throughout one’s childhood. And even then both her parents were still alive, and neither was leader of the Serpents. She and Polly had once considered each other all they had, too.

“I’m sorry about what happened to your sister,” he said some time later, watching for her reaction carefully. Betty sucked in a sharp breath through her nose, shaking her head slightly to stop the unpleasant pang of loneliness that threatened to cloud her thoughts.

“It’s fine. She is where she is most happy; I’m happy for her,” Betty lied, hoping that if she said it enough it would eventually become true. Jughead didn’t look entirely convinced but she ignored his expression.

“Jellybean is excited to spend some time with you, if that offers you any comfort,” Jughead told her, shyly. Betty bit her lip at his timid look. “She, um, she thinks you’re very pretty,” he finished, clearing his throat gruffly. She felt her cheeks glow with the heat of a blush. They continued their dance for some moments in a newfound companionable silence.

“Prince Forsythe,” she started as the swept around the court.

“Jughead,” he corrected automatically. If she was to be his wife it was only fitting that she called him by his preferred name. Her nose scrunched adorably at the foreign word.

“Excuse me?” she asked.

“You can call me Jughead, it’s… it’s always been my nickname,” he shrugged, his cheeks staining pink under her scrutinising gaze. She nodded, testing the word out on her tongue – it didn’t feel as odd as she expected.

“Jughead. I just wanted to let you know that I’m aware neither of us are exactly thrilled by the prospect of our impending marriage. In much the same way I did not ask to be engaged to you I’m sure you are less than ecstatic at the prospect of being married to someone like me,” she rushed out, not dropping his eyes despite her embarrassment willing her to. His brow furrowed at her words.

“Someone like you?” he questioned, relieved that more and more people seemed to be joining in with the dancing now, thinning out some of the attention. She looked at him as if he were slow in his comprehension.

“Yes, someone like me. We could not be more opposite in our personalities, could we not? If not for some reason I think my parents are not telling me I assure you we would never be forced together,” she explained. Jughead didn’t want to raise his defences but her words were irking him.

“You assume to know my personality, once again, Princess,” he spat, more venom coating his tone than he’d intended. He was so tired of presumptions. Betty bristled.

“Like you assumed to know mine?” she guessed with a raised brow. His mouth twisted under her accusations. Her level of fight was surprising him.

“So neither of us are exactly model examples of being unprejudiced,” he muttered, lowering his eyes. “But it’s not like we don’t have good reason to be.” The look her sent her way was anything but flattering.

Betty couldn’t understand why she felt so riled up. She was practically known for being mild mannered and, much to her chagrin, completely pliable. Perhaps it was because, despite his assumptions, he really didn’t know her. She could start over with him and form an entirely new impression. Yes, she was aware she probably wasn’t creating the best one right now, but there was a sense of power simmering just beneath the surface that, little by little, she seemed to be setting free. Which is why when she saw Cheryl glaring at them from the corner of the dancefloor she couldn’t help but provoke, despite knowing how unwise it was to step on a snake.

“Your mistress is staring at us,” she said harshly, not meeting his eye. He tensed beneath her hands, glancing over in Cheryl’s direction with a humourless laugh.

“She does look rather unhappy, doesn’t she?” he joked, not bothering to deny her claim. If they weren’t going to get along then he wouldn’t deny himself the fun of tormenting her. Betty looked back at her, watching at the glare transformed into a smirk.

“Perhaps you should put us all out of our miseries and dance with her instead,” she suggested, loosening her grip on him. To her surprise he held on tighter.

“I think there would be some protests to that,” he whispered, nodding his head in the direction of their parents who were currently lacking all discretion in their staring. “We’re under their watchful eye.”

“Many, it would seem,” she retorted, still referring to the Blossom princess. Jughead sighed.

“You think I don’t know I was your second choice, either,” he scolded suddenly. Betty’s mouth dropped open, unable to find the words to reply. “I’m sorry that you’re being forced to slum it with the likes of me. Believe me when I say that I wouldn’t be quite so complicit with our parents’ demands if I didn’t have to be.” She felt the hot sting of tears at the corner of her eyes, damning her body’s betrayal.

Betty had never known a dance to feel as if it had lasted so long before. The moment the final notes started to die on the wind Jughead stepped away, bowing courteously.

“Until next time, Your Highness,” he said, looking up from beneath his lashes. Her breath caught in her throat. He turned abruptly and headed towards the castle, his father catching his arm as he attempted to pass. She watched the interaction curiously, heads bent towards each other, lips barely moving as they argued. Jughead yanked his limb free, nostrils flaring as he continued his retreat into the depths of the building. Betty stood unmoving, not quite sure what to do with herself, arms suddenly feeling very empty where they hung by her sides.

“Your Highness,” a voice came from behind her. Betty’s eyes drifted shut at the sound, fingers twitching against her will. She turned slowly, not ready to meet the sight that was going to greet her. It couldn’t be…

“Prince Archibald… Princess Veronica,” she welcomed with a surprisingly steady voice. She attributed it to years of lessons curtesy of Alice. “I didn’t expect you to be here. I thought you would still be on your post-wedding tour,” she said sweetly, teeth just slightly gritted. Archie had the sense to look uncomfortable by the interaction. Betty tried to plead with her eyes, begging for an explanation, but he wouldn’t meet them.

“We are, but we were nearby just in time to attend. I’m so glad about it, too; I’ve heard so many wonderful things about your festivals, Princess Elizabeth,” Veronica gushed, unaware of the conversation Betty was trying to have with her husband. Veronica clung to his arm proudly, as if she were happy to be worn like a trophy. Or perhaps it was the other way around, Betty mused bitterly. “I’ve been so excited to meet you – Archie just speaks so highly of his childhood friend, I feel as if we are sisters already!” Betty swallowed around the lump in her throat, not sure if she were going to cry or be sick. She prayed for neither.

“Thank you, Your Highness,” Betty replied, her voice coming out breathless even to her own ears. Her palms were aching. “I hope you’re enjoying the evening, if you’ll excuse me,” Betty rushed out, almost tripping over her skirts in an attempt to stride away from the couple and their aura of happiness.

He was a coward, a complete coward, she lamented as she pressed herself into the cool stone of the castle walls, taking comfort in the way they grazed the skin of her arms, finally hidden out of view from a number of prying eyes. The tears fell all at once, and she let them.

Jughead had seen the interaction from beneath the covered walkaway that wrapped around this portion of the castle. He’d been ready to leave, to not look at the infuriating woman he was to wed except for when it was required of him, but he saw the newlywed couple approaching her. He’d been informed of the previous engagement, and seeing Prince Archibald with the dark haired beauty at his side irritated him more than he expected.

He watched her run, teeth deeply sunken into her lower lip as she fled out of sight. He found himself feeling sorry for her before he could stop it, almost having to force himself to remember their earlier exchange. Feeling any kind of affection for her wouldn’t get him anywhere, he tried to tell himself. However, he knew that the fire he’d seen in her was running on limited fuel – soon enough it would burn out.

***

Betty usually enjoyed the sense of exhaustion that always came after one of the kingdom’s celebrations. Her stomach tended to be full, her feet aching, and her head light. She would drift to bed on the high that the celebrations created, her eyelids fighting against themselves to stay open as they hung heavily hooded, eyelashes brushing her cheeks with each slow blink.

But now she just felt utterly drained. She didn’t think she had enough energy to carry herself to her chambers, bare feet dragging against the cold tiles. The castle had taken on an eerie silence in wake of the festival, the night sky turning a lighter shade of blue as the morning began to stir. Her eyes followed the patterns the dying torch lights made on the bricks until something else took her attention.

She was just passing the library she considered her own, the small archway next to it leading to a tiny courtyard that was rarely occupied by anyone other than herself. A dark figure balanced on the edge of the fountain, leaning back against one of the marble swan carvings that decorated the edge of the feature. One of Jughead’s legs was bent at the knee, resting on the lip of the fountain, the other planted on the floor. His hair was falling over his eyes as he bent his head over the book in his hands, shielding their depths from view.

“What are you doing?” Betty found herself asking, a little less politely than she probably should. There was no one else around, what were her manners to matter? Jughead lifted his head lazily towards her, seeming completely unstartled by her presence. His eyes ran over her before returning to the book.

“Reading,” he told her plainly. “I couldn’t sleep,” he added as an afterthought. She couldn’t begrudge him that; she has spent many a night tucked beneath a blanket of stars in this courtyard, especially in the days after Polly had been banished.

“What… are you reading?” she asked, hovering in the archway. She didn’t know why she was trying to start a conversation with him, perfectly aware that she could just leave him and go to bed, but her tiredness was making her bold. He lifted the spine so that she could read the title, squinting in the low light. “The Castle of Perseverance?” she probed, stunned. He met her questioning look with one of intrigue.

“You haven’t read it? It came from your library,” he informed her, unashamed that he had been going through her collection. What’s mine is yours, she thought with drowsy amusement.

“No, it’s one of my favourites actually. I just…” she trailed off, walking further into the clearing to balance herself across from him on the fountain’s edge, the sound of trickling water soothing her frayed nerves.

“A story of morality,” he picked up on her implication. “You know, I am aware of the concept despite my background,” he remarked, the accusation thankfully holding less malice than earlier in the night.

“I didn’t mean…” she sighed. “I guess I did,” she admitted, focusing on the way the water rippled, dipping the tips of her fingers into it.

“Mankind ignores the council of his Good Angel and allows his Bad Angel to lead him into the services of the World,” Jughead summarised with a quiet chuckle. “I can see how you would think I’d relate.” Betty pressed her lips together, the weight of her judgements hitting her with full force in the early hours.

“Mankind is pardoned in the end,” she supplied lightly, hoping to lift the darkened mood between them. Jughead scoffs.

“Not before he’s fallen to the vices of Lust and Folly,” he reminded her. Betty hummed, drawing patterns in the water’s surface still. She was surprised when he spoke again. “The Seven Deadly Sins attack the castle where Mankind has found solace, but are repulsed by the symbol of Christ’s passion,” he murmured, rising swiftly from his seat and heading towards the bushes that enclosed the clearing. He plucked a flower from the foliage and returned to her, presenting her with the pale pink blossom.

“A rose,” she filled in quietly, taking the offering. An amused smile settled on his face as he remained standing, staring at the flower she was now twirling between her fingers.

“I’m not sure they did their job at keeping immorality out this time,” he joked, looking about at the rose bushes that littered the space around them, as well as the ones that grew all over the castle grounds.

Betty watched him, the hunch in his shoulders, the soft curl in his hair. His teeth were chewing at the broken skin of his bottom lip, his mind appearing to be deep in thought. He looked… ashamed. Betty rose, setting her free hand on his arm until he turned his face towards her.

“I wouldn’t be so sure,” she whispered.

They stood, gazes locked, until a shadow approached them from inside the castle. Betty pulled him to the side, pressing them both against the wall until the stranger had passed, seeing that it was just some of her mother’s maids. All the same she was still glad they hadn’t been spotted. The way information spread through the walls of her home had always set her on edge. When she turned, Jughead was staring at her peculiarly.

“I should probably bid you goodnight,” she said, taking a step back from him. He nodded, pulled from his daze.

“Indeed. Goodnight, Elizabeth,” he spoke softly. It took her a while to realise that he hadn’t addressed her by title.

“Betty,” she called after his retreating figure. He glanced over his shoulder.

“I’m sorry?”

“You can call me Betty,” she clarified, face flushing in much the same way his had when he’d offered her his nickname during the dance that seemed so long ago. She wondered briefly if he regretted sharing that part of him with her now. He nodded.

“Goodnight then, Betty,” he said before turning and disappearing around the corner.

“Goodnight, Jughead,” she replied a little too late for him to hear, stroking the velvet petals of the flower in her hand.

#bughead #bughead fanfiction #bughead au #betty cooper #jughead jones #betty x jughead #riverdale #riverdale fanfiction #bughead fan fiction #jetty #writing

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catmatty-blog · 7 years

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Getting Your Characters Halfway to Batman: What it’s Really Like to Lose a Parent (Part 1)

Recently I saw someone ask a writing blog we mutually follow about losing a parent. This made me realize that a lot of writers use a parent’s death to traumatize their characters and that I, unlike most people my age, have lost a parent and can help. This first part is going to focus on the initial loss. Feel free to message me with any other questions.

Background on me first. I was 17 when my dad passed away very suddenly to an illness that was only briefly explained by the doctors. My relationship with my dad was a very complicated one as he was not the easiest man to get along with (read: yeah, I have daddy issues, I am aware).

Also, this information can work for other kinds of loss, not just parents, but I will refer to the person who dies as a parent as that is the experience that I have.

Before the Loss Actually Occurs

So once your character knows that their is a possibility that their parent might die, there is this strange mind set that is hopeful yet morbid. This would occur if their parent was injured or sick, but is receiving or has received some kind of medical attention and all the character can do is wait.

Things running through your character’s mind would be along the lines of:

“When they get through this, I will never take them for granted again.”

“Who will take care of (blank) if they die”

“If they die (or don’t die) I will change and do (blank)”

Their last interaction with their parent or some other memory (about a million times)

Every awful thing they ever said to their parent ever on replay (also about a million times)

They will run through every awful scenario

They will also run through every hopeful scenario and get their hopes way too high, which makes things even worse if and when the loss occurs

Things your character might be doing:

Any nervous tick they have, but constantly

Calling or notifying anyone else who needs to know

Coming up with a cliffnotes version of what happened that they will have to explain over and over again

Probably crying silently off by themselves out of nervousness if they’re an emotional type

When this happened to me, I took charge and called all of our relatives on behalf of my mom. I was surprisingly calm, but highly emotional at the same time, so I was that person who was silently crying by myself in a secluded hallway of the hospital. I had one final conversation with my father and I didn’t even cry because I was trying to keep myself together for him and my mom. If your character is like me, and feels the need to care for everyone around them, they will be mother-henning the life out of everyone they can to distract themselves from the reality they may have to face.

When the Loss Actually Occurs

I personally was in the room with my dad when he died, and I would suggest having your character in the room (or right there with their parent, wherever they are) as well for these reasons:

If you like to write tear-jerking scenes, this is your chance

Having your character in the room will do a lot more damage to them later on

This gives you the opportunity for your character to deal with something similar to PTSD in the future because watching someone die really messes you up (even almost 2 years later, I still get triggered by certain people, sounds, and/or situations that throw me into panic attacks, flashbacks, and/or tears at least)

This, in turn, gives you a lot of material to work with in the story later on because they will have to deal with panic attacks or PTSD episodes

Things your character might be thinking/saying:

“Oh no” (a thousand times in various iterations)

“I’m sorry” (they will probably feel guilty even if this is not their fault, or if it is, then they will focus in on how things are their fault and try to apologize)

Nothing. Trauma can make your mind go blank or numb from the shock, so their internal dialogue may be more like radio static than anything else

Things your character might be doing:

Weeping (by which I mean ugly-crying and possibly screaming as well)

Holding their parent’s hand, or in some way trying have some final form of contact with their parent. Depending on how contagious their parent may be, this may or may not be able to happen and if not that will cause added drama or regret on the part of your character

Pacing (if they can’t run off), trying to run away, and/or trying to distract themselves or make everything that is happening go away (reality is hard to deal with, and death is even harder to deal with, so trying to make their reality not their reality or trying to get away is a probable response)

I may write a part of this series that is just my own personal story written out the same way I would write it as a scene in a novel, but that’s enough for this post.

Hopefully some of this will help, if you need more specific questions I will go into more detail in another post about writing a good death scene and how things go moving forward in another, or you can message me and I will try to answer your question to the best of my ability.

#writing help #death #parent #loss #Halfway to Batman

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distant-rose · 5 years

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Ah, don't worry, I won't be offended. I mean, exams, horrible. Oh, and calling me Santa is fine! Glad you're on board with the fic. In my mind, there's still a blank page, so tell me a bit about your preferences! Do you like canon better or an AU? Crack, couple or family fluff or smut? Any specific tropes/characters (as mere side characters anyway, obviously, this is gonna be fully CS) you don't want to see at all? ~CSSS

I’m assuming because you’re messaging me at 10:30, that you’re also in Europe, Santa. Either that or you have one of those jobs that requires you to be up at unholy hours, in which case I apologize. I’m going to warn you right now that this is going to be a giant wall of text. In fact, I’m going to have to cut this bitch because it’s going to clog the dashes of the poor bastards who follow me.

So, my thoughts, hopes, dreams and preferences are under the cut.

As for my preferences (and thank you for actually asking), I don’t mind canon or AU, whichever is easiest for you. When it comes to AUs, however, I’m one of those rare people who is a “eh” on Lt. Duckling with only a few exceptions to that rule. I prefer AUs where the author really knows the subject material really well and I’m kinda just submerge myself in their world. I’m a huge fan of sports and this fandom has been absolutely amazing with their sports au fics. I’m going to with my gut and guess that you’re more likely European, possibly even from the UK? (if so, hello from London *waves*) So hockey and baseball are probably not your fancy but if you’re comfortable with sport, I do love rugby and football (soccer) and if you’re comfortable doing a take on that, you’re welcome to. Just note my team preferences on the side bar. (I love Man Utd but hate Mourinho, he has zero control of that locker room)

I’m good with crack, couple, family or smut really. I prefer feels probably because I’m not sure people get my sense of humor. I guess the only to describe it is Monty Python meets Scrubs meets Animal House. I like taking the piss out of things and being irreverent. So, that’s kind of crack I’m into. As for them as a couple or as a family, I’ve got preferences admittedly. I’m not a huge fan of codependency or Emma being an absolute to bitch to Killian, which is something I’ve see frequently in fics unfortunately. I’m going to be a bit controversial when I say this but I do think we, as a fandom, tend to demean or sideline Emma in favor of making Killian perfect or whatever. Like I love him, but he’s flawed and can be a real bastard at times. In regard to the codependency thing, I prefer my Captain Swan as entities who are self-maintaining and could be successful on their own but have a mutual love and respect for each other. I firmly believe that they’re their own people and Killian is capable of being Killian without Emma and Emma is capable of being Emma without Killian. They don’t need each other, but they love each other and support each and make each other better, not functional.

If there’s anything I can ask for and I don’t mean to offend anyone but I prefer depictions of Emma Swan as more strong and bad ass than vulnerable. She’s not a damsel. She’s a goddamn superhero. She isn’t Lois Lane. She’s Wonder Woman or, better yet, she’s Rogue. If you know comics, I’m more in the camp of Emma and Killian being most similar to Rogue and Gambit or like reverse Batman and Catwoman. Emotionally scarred tough bad asses and the morally ambiguous bastards who love them. But yeah, I prefer my Emma Swan as being a bad ass bitch rather than needing to be saved. I cannot stress that enough. I love Emma Swan goddamn it.

As for Killian, I prefer actual Killian. Like I prefer the smirky, sassy, snarky bastard who puts his heart into everything, is willing to play dirty, often doesn’t think but is an opportunist dick and has habit of trying to do everything on his own asshole that is Captain Killian “Hook” Jones. So, yeah, Killian. Sometimes I feel like I see more Deckhand Hook or Colin in fandom’s depictions of him and it kinda strikes me as wrong. So, yeah, I prefer my Killian saucy, bold and morally ambiguous and less awkward shy Deckhand and Colin-esque.

Sorry I went off on a tangent there, but like I have a lot of preferences and literally no one has actually asked me this question, so I’m going to make the most of it. Like this isn’t me mad, it’s actually me excited.

As for tropes and characters, I’m a long time fan of friends-to-lovers, or even best-friends-to-lovers, probably because I’ve actually seen that shit happen. Firmly believe the best relationships are fostered in friendship so yeah, friends-to-lovers is definitely my kinda of trope. I also love banter. I’m a sarcastic asshole so I love it and will eat that shit up with a spoon. I’m also more into subtle gestures of love and affection rather than grand gestures. It’s the little things that often matter more. So, public declarations are a huge no for me.

As for characters, I’ve never cared for Neal. I think he’s pretty shit, though not the worst person in the world. Just very self-absorbed and doesn’t ever realize just much he fucked Emma over and the show kinda just glossed it over but giving someone a criminal record, especially in the United States, is one of the worst things you can do but I won’t get into that. I don’t think he’s an abusive murderous asshole but I do think he’s a prick incapable of looking beyond his own wants and desires and never truly comprehends the way his actions effect others, which in some circumstances is even worse. In other words, would prefer not to see him but I acknowledge he’s integral part of Emma’s narrative, so don’t be that kind to him but don’t make him Satan?

The other usual CS villain - Milah. I have no beef with her. I actually don’t understand the beef with her, especially from Hook fans aside from them being insecure about whether Killian would do if he had to choose between them. That’s very much a nonissue for me. As far as I’m concerned, they ran away together, they were in love and now she’s dead. She might have done a horrible thing by her husband and son but she never did anything wrong to Killian, in fact she died for him. That’s my official stance. Anti-Milah depictions aren’t the end all be all to me and in fact a lot of friends and writers have do a lot of anti-Milah stuff in their writing and it hasn’t been a deal breaker for me but I just prefer not to see it.

I’m also not that big of a fan of Rumple, I’m very take it or leave it with him. I’m actually more in the Red Beauty camp in regard to Belle’s partners but I also don’t mind her with Will either. As for characters I would love to see, I would love to see Elsa because aside from Regina (and I even put Regina loosely in this category), she’s kinda Emma’s only canonical friend. I mean even Ruby is more Snow’s friend than Emma’s. So yeah, #GiveEmmaFriends2KForever. I also have a lot of BROTPs for Killian, namely with David, Belle, Jasmine, Ariel and Tiana. (Killian Jones has a Princess Squad, you cannot take this from me.) I don’t think we see enough Killian and Jasmine BROTP, so if you can manage it, I would love to see it. #GiveKillianFriends2KForever

So yeah, sorry for this huge wall of text but I have a lot of thoughts and a lot of opinions. And I’m sorry you got stuck with me for a giftee because I’m particular and have a lot of preferences but I promise as long as just don’t blatantly disregard my base preferences and I don’t know write Killian Jones as a Red Sox player or make Emma a love sick damsel while Killian can do no wrong, I promise I will love whatever you make. But you’re already taking a step in the right direction because you actually asked. So, thank you.

#asks #answered #anon #cs santa 2018 #csss #ro fic preferences

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