#anyways I usually don't write shit this early in a fandom but it happened so whatever
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Having written yet another Percicobeth drabble (or ficlet? Probably? Like the difference is in word count, right? And I'm idk how long that one was but feels long-ish), I'm thinking about comments I've gotten (and ignored) on my other Percicobeth stuff, people complaining that Nico is gay so he can't be in a relationship with Annabeth and ofc my first instinct is to go "I was here long before Nico was gay, and shipped this ship, I'm not gonna abandon it just because the owner of the boats made up something new. I've been in this boat for over a decade. You think I give a shit if the owner suddenly says my boat isn't made for the deep waters I've been taking her into this whole time?"
And that of course is totally valid. I don't think people need to give up ships or headcanons or whatever else they've had for a long time just because something changed or became official in canon. But I also don't think it matters what people ship, irrespective of canon anyway. Like, yeah, in the heydays of fandom, shipping canon gay characters with female characters was really frowned upon because there were so little canon gay characters, it was annoying to see them scrubbed out for a m/f ship, but it's not really like that anymore. But also, tbh, as annoying as it was, I never really gave too much of a shit because fandom is fandom. People like what they like. And most of the time they retconned them to be bi, not straight so who gives a shit 🤷♂️ just block that person if you want and move along
But that also reminds me that I did get a comment complaining that by making Nico "bi", other people will feel like it's okay to make him straight, which a) that's not how that works and b) I'm not making him bisexual, I'm saying Annabeth is his exception.
In all my years of being in the PJO fandom, the only two girls I've ever shipped Nico with was Thalia (whooo, go early days PJO!) and Annabeth. And Thalia/Nico was never a big ship to me tbh. I think I may have actively shipped it for like a few months, and even then I didn't really seek it out. If I did read it, it was usually because they were a secondary relationship in a fic with a really fascinating plot. Like the only two fics I can remember reading with them as a pairing was a time travel kidfic, and this fic where the gods faded due to lack of belief so the kids had to take their spot as gods. And both fics had an ensemble cast and a plot I wish I remembered more.
So basically - it's really just Annabeth.
And truly and honestly, and this is just for me, I don't care how you guys approach it, but I never write Percicobeth with intention of Nico being bisexual. Even in the way back, when canon gay Nico was just a dream, I always just saw Percicobeth as "Nico is really gay, but Annabeth is hot so it doesn't matter for her". And I think a lot of people saw the ship that way too.
And for all that people talk about sexuality being fluid, it's really baffling to me that some people can't wrap their minds around a fictional relationship where a gay male character hooks up with a girl he really likes, but otherwise isn't attracted to other girls.
It happens in couples where a person transitions but their partner stays with them because they love them too much. Would they look at that gender on other people with the same vibrant romantic/sexual attraction? No. But on their partner it looks good, and that's all that matters. And all the jokes about gay men kissing twinks that turn out to be lesbians thinking they were kissing another lesbian.
Also I swear when I was, like, thirteen or so, people used to use the label homoflexible/heteroflexible, which basically meant "I'm gay/straight, but if you're hot enough, I might be interested". I wonder what happened to it 🤔 but yeah, anyway - sexuality is fluid, people kiss and date and fuck who they want, and sometimes who they want is not always what their label says, and it's really up to them if they want to change it.
So in summation. Yeah, I know Nico is gay. But I've shipped Percicobeth for over a decade, and I'm gonna keep shipping it because it makes me happy. And when I write the ship, Nico is still gay, but either Annabeth is hot enough that he doesn't care, or they end up having a really deep connection and friendship outside of their relationship to Percy, that they end up hooking up anyway.
Also sometimes I write Percicobeth as "she fucks Percy and he fucks Percy, but they don't fuck each other, they just scheme together different ways to fuck with Percy", because sometimes that's what polyamory is! Sometimes it's "I'm dating X, and X is dating me and Y, but I'm just good friends with Y, and Y is just good friends with me" and that's okay too. It doesn't always have to be everyone is in love and dating each other.
The world contains multitudes.
And at the end of the day, I write what I want.
#happy talks about his stories#this is sort of random but it's been billowing in my head for a while so. here you go 😂#percicobeth#happy talks pjo
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all or nothing pt II | stranger things ; b.hargrove
A/N ; Listen.. I was not expecting to have another part so soon but when this idea came, I had to roll with it. So, this is the part in which Billy realizes reader is the only female in a family of males (i realize I mentioned readers mom the previous post but apparently, she is deceased, but anyway.. ) and.. yeah. More stubbornness. More Billy, being equally stubborn.
I feel like this one is gonna get really... intense.
Pairing ; Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader
Timeline / Other Stuff to Note ; all or nothing pt I can be found by clicking. Highly suggested you read that one first and then come back here. Just so you have a sense of what's happening. This is set in season 2 BUT BUT... as I said last night -and in the other stuff area of the other reader x character stranger things works I've done, there will be no Upside Down + it's unholy terrors, this is basically like.. slice of life heavy on the intensity and maybe some angst in this case. So no.. Billy won't be dying. And his character may or may not go through a few.. Growth spurts because I felt like it could've happened if he'd been left on the show. So.. liberties have been taken, read at your own risk.
Tag List ; @musichealsscars is the only person on my actual Stranger Things tag list presently. I'll throw a tag out here to @rampagewriting -- feel free to ignore if you like bb. if you'd like to be added to my taglists for anything including Stranger things , please let me know or add yourself -> here.
Warnings ; Older and younger brothers + meeting the father, Billy's being stubborn as per usual, reader is equally stubborn, a little angst in the form of reader's not so long ago heartbreak and rumors, Carol being a b*tch about Reader, and just.. Nothing serious, tbh. OH YEAH. AND TITS. TITS ARE MENTIONED. Listen, this chapter is.. Basically chaos.
Other Stuff ; tag list doc || my rules - fandoms and some characters I write for || requests are open (pls.. pls... send me things) but they're limited to headcanon asks + filth/fluff alphabet letters and I'm not accepting wrestling / wrestlers in my ask box. Any other fandom/character but wrestling that I happen to write for is fine and I beg of you -> send me things.
I do not consent to my work being reposted elsewhere or copied/reworked/rewritten and reposted here or elsewhere. You don't own this, I do. So like... don't steal my shit.
The bacon is burning, you can smell it when you roll over in bed. As you start to wake up, the usual morning chaos that is your family and all their noises spill in through the partial crack in your door which flies open unceremoniously with your youngest brother Abel hurrying in.
You roll away from him and try and sweep your arm out to keep him out of licking range because he likes to lick your face to wake you up most mornings. “Abel, kid, no.. Not today, demon.” you grumble as you try and shove your head beneath a pillow. From the wide open door, your older brother Jackson throws the bra you left in the bathroom after your shower the night before right at you and it settles beside your hand. “Get the fuck up, sunshine.” Jackson yells, his voice grating your last nerve because it’s early and all you wanna do is sleep. Finish out the dumb little dream you were having about the way Billy’s hands felt on your ass or his mouth against yours.
“She’s not up yet?” your brother Mikey’s standing in the open door behind your older brother Jackson. “Jesus, what’s she gonna do, sleep all fuckin day? Dad! She’s not up yet! Can I get the cold water now?”
Your father laughs in the kitchen. “Leave your sister alone, you little shit. Get in here and eat. Grub is done.”
“Can you idiots fuck all the way off? I’m gonna get up. I mean, if you wanna see my ass when I get outta bed, by all means, idiots.” you call out to your brothers as you sit up with the plaid blanket on your bed wrapped around your upper body and you try to reach for the AC DC shirt you’d taken off at some point the night before when you got too hot.
Your brothers all bolt down the hall and you let the blanket drop so you have that little extra length to your arm span. After you tug on the thin oversized shirt you grab the jeans and tank top you’d laid out to wear the night before so you can put them on after your shower. And you make your way down the hall and pound on the bathroom door.
But it’s no use. Your younger brother Mikey is in the shower, the radio turned up so high and the shower running full blast, so he doesn’t hear the five times you pound at the door.
“Well fuck you then, little shit.” you roll your eyes and turn to go back into your bedroom to change.
The very familiar rumble of an engine catches your attention just as you’ve managed to put both legs in one leg of your jeans and you’ve nearly toppled over, just managing to catch yourself by the headboard on your bed to stay upright. You peek out through the tapestry that serves as a curtain over your bedroom window and as soon as you see Billy’s dark blue Camaro pull in behind your father’s square body truck, you flatten yourself against the wall and take a few deep breaths all while telling yourself that just because he’s shown up means nothing.
So he kept a promise. There’s no reason for your heart to be all fluttery. Or your stomach to be doing the lazy little flips that it is right now.
You discard the shirt you’d thrown on to walk down the hall to the bathroom and pull on the white tank top you’d planned to wear with your favorite flannel. The only problems is that right as you get your AC DC shirt off, the last thread of hope for the nail holding your tapestry in place over the damned window snaps and the tapestry falls away to one side.
And out in the car, Billy happens to glance up at this exact, precise moment. Not only can he see you totally nude from the waist up, but he can see the various rock and metal posters, the tarot card tapestry, the marijuana leaf tapestry and the christmas lights you have tacked up around the room for extra ambience.
You don’t see him because you’re standing on the bed and trying to put the tapestry that’s just fallen down off your window back in place because the old geezer across the gravel road is nothing if not a gross pervy old sort. You’ve just gotten the tapestry back in place when your oldest brother pounds on your bedroom door.
“Yo! You better not be asleep again, sunshine.”
“Fuck off, Jackson, you’re not the boss of me!” you stick out your tongue and flip off the closed bedroom door. You can hear him walking away, but just as you’ve flipped your head upside down and you’re trying to scrunch some mousse into your hair to tease it the way you like, the younger of your brothers, Mikey, he’s outside the door.
“Hey gremlin! You’ve got company. It’s a boyyyy.”
You tense up because all of your brothers and your father are nothing if not intimidating, especially when it comes to you.
“Dad’s gonna grill him and I’m gonna laugh my ass off.”
“Sissy! Your boyfriend is here!” Abel calls out through the door and you palm your face. “He’s not my boyfriend, champ. I’m comin, hold your horses, people.” you call out as you dig around for your left shoe in the chaos that is your room.
After you find the bold red Converse and slip both shoes onto your feet, you grab your backpack and rush out, hopefully before your brothers and your father bring down the Spanish Inquisition onto the head of Billy Hargrove.
And naturally, your brother Mikey is in awe because he hero worships the guy.
Your father is sizing Billy up and you wanna groan because you know exactly what he’s thinking and you know that when you finally get home from working the arcade after school, he’s going to give you a very long lecture.
“Hargrove… Hi. Uh, what are you doin here?” you drag your fingers through your hair as you tilt your head to look up at him, curious. “How’d you find me?”
Mikey’s grin is so big, he’s so proud of himself. “I’m in class with his sister.”
“Step.” Max and Billy say it in unison, glaring at one another quietly. Mikey laughs and shrugs. “She told me Billy wanted to come by today last night at the arcade so I told ‘er where we lived.”
You give him a dirty look when nobody’s paying attention and he gulps.
Yeah, he’s in for it just as soon as the two of you are out of school for the afternoon.
Mikey glances at your father. “He’s the best player on the basketball team, dad.”
This softens your father but only a little. He grins and claps a rough hand down onto Billy’s shoulder. “Basketball, huh? I played back in the day too, kid.”
Billy chuckles. And he’s shuffling his feet awkwardly, same as you. You almost want to laugh because the awkwardness he feels right now isn’t something he’s used to and you can tell. Also, you want to laugh harder because the awkwardness he feels right now is solely his fault.
You didn’t ask him to come by. You never even hinted that you expected him to.
You’d say you didn’t want him to either, but unfortunately, that’d be a lie.
“We should probably get going.” you speak up before your father can get all lost in his own glory days -or alternately, try to put the fear of God into Billy by telling him he’s ex-military and he may or may not have a few screws loose, and your father tosses you a brown paper sack.
“Peeled the orange for ya as usual, sunshine.” your father gives you a hug. Finally, you set off for school with Billy and Max. Almost the second you were all out in the yard, you laugh and give Billy a quiet and slightly apologetic shrug as if to remind him that he’s brought on the events of the morning to himself.
Billy opens the passenger door and Max slips into the backseat wordlessly. You raise a brow. “You could’ve kept your seat, Red.”
“It’s fine. You can sit there.” Max offers, studying you with an intent and curious look as you slip into the seat and settle in. Billy doesn’t blast the radio on the drive like he usually does just to keep her quiet. Instead, to Max’s surprise, the two of you are actually attempting a conversation. It’s full of awkward pauses and banter back and forth, but it’s a side of her stepbrother she doesn’t see come out often at all. As the Camaro pulls to a stop in front of Hawkins Middle, you get out to let Max out and she smiles at you before gathering her backpack and rushing through the doors to the school as if she’s been launched straight from a cannon.
You get back in and the short second or two it takes to get over to the high school from the middle school is filled with this heavy kind of silence. Metallica is playing quietly on the radio and you’re humming along, drumming your fingers against the passenger door.
“Y’know, you’re probably gonna fall like.. Four places in the whole popularity thing.. Right?” you question as the Camaro comes to a stop in the spot Billy’s chosen to be his.
Billy shrugs. Takes a drag from the cigarette he’s lit and laughs quietly. “I thought we talked about this last night, darling. Fuck ‘em.”
You shrug and laugh because that’s all you can do. The second you get out of the passenger seat you can feel the eyes of the collective whole of the female population of Hawkins High staring at the two of you. You stand taller.
The stares and the whispers aren’t new to you. They started when you were a kid, when your mom died and nobody really knew what to say. They continued through middle school when you got labeled a troublemaker, one of the bad kids. They’re still going now, only it’s different and honestly, you’d take the rumors about you circa middle school over the rumors going around about you now.
But you don’t care anymore because you’re over the small town mindset. And high school is bullshit. And you’ve got more important things to do than waste time worrying about what everybody’s saying about you behind your back.
It takes you by surprise when Billy casually slips an arm around you and pulls you against his side. Walks right up to Tommy, Carol and Steve Harrington as if this is nothing out of the norm. You can feel Carol watching you, dying to say something smart but a quick menacing smirk from you has the little smug look dropping right off her face because she’s probably just remembered the fight you two had on the playground all the way back in fifth grade.
The one your older brother had to break up.
“Who’s your friend, Billy?” Nicole gives you a dismissive once over. She’s already thinking of things to say about you when she gets Carol and Tina alone in the girls bathroom inside the building. You smirk right back at Nicole, looking dead into her eyes. Daring her to be brave enough to say it now, with her chest, in front of you.
Billy chuckles. He introduces you with that lazy and laid-back grin.
Carol gapes. “You’re shitting me, right? Her? This is the girl you gave the sunflower to?”
Billy’s all calm smiles. “Yeah.”
“We need to have a serious talk.”
Billy laughs and rubs his chin. “Right. When I ask your opinion, Carol, I’ll let you know.”
Every part of you wants to just walk away for his sake but you’re too damn proud and petty to do it. Walking away is going to make Carol and the rest of the so-called in crowd froth at the mouth and rush to gossip about how you’re obviously afraid.
And you’re honestly anything but.
You catch sight of some of your friends as they show up and you nudge Billy. “I’m gonna go now. Thanks for the lift?”
And you walk away, but it’s not without giving Carol one last smirk.
A smirk that has her practically seething.
And honestly, you can’t wait to hear the rumors she rushes back to start this time around.
Almost the second you’re standing at the locker where you friends usually congregate in the morning, your best friend Katie nudges you and nods towards Billy. “Did my eyes trick me or did you get out of Hargrove’s Camaro just a few minutes ago? Oh my god, you’ve gotta tell me everything.”
You shrug. “He gave me a lift, yes.”
“How does he smell?”
You gape at her and grimace. “Ew, what the hell kind of question is that? What’d y’ think I did, sniff the damn guy? I don’t know!” you laugh and your words trail off.
“So I was right. It wasn’t Keith that gave you the sunflower, was it?”
“Fiiine. It wasn’t Keith. But he’s up to something, K.” you turn and gesture in Billy’s direction discreetly, “ I can feel it in my bones.”
“I say just let it happen. Bad press is better than none at all.” Katie shrugs and you give her a playful shrug. “You’re crazy, K. Seriously insane.” you roll your eyes as you finally manage to pry open your locker door and change out the books you took home the night before for the books you’ll need for class.
You walk past Billy on your way to homeroom but his arm shoots out and you wind up smooshed against his side again. “I’ll see ya after class.”
You shrug. “Maybe.”
“I’ll see you after class.” Billy repeats and it’s firmer. That little roguish smirk playing at lips slightly bruised from the kiss at the arcade the night before.
“I mean, if you want to, who am I to stop you?” you smirk right back, holding his gaze. Defiant.
If he really wants to win you over, he’s going to have to learn that you’re not like the other girls at Hawkins. Or the other girls he knows.
You’ve already caved one time and the outcome was disappointing. This time around, you’re determined to play smarter. To make him do all the chasing and not to give in quite so easy under any circumstances.
Billy’s smirk grows. “See ya then, darling.”
“Whatever you say, Hargrove.” you shrug as you and Katie walk away, disappearing into the homeroom class you share together.
#billy hargrove#billy hargrove fanfiction#billy hargrove imagine#billy hargrove x fem!reader#billy hargrove x fem!reader imagine#billy hargrove x fem!reader fanfiction#// if you think for one second her dad's not gonna warm up and take billy under his wing at some point you are in for a surprise#// look i just wanted to write this so I am#// this chapter got weird this was not the turn I expected it to take.#// soz about giving reader these huge backstories and personalities i am still uh.. learning how to write reader fics.#// i try to stay away from physical characteristics and stuff so hopefully even with the personality bits anybody can still read these#// and imagine themselves#// hopefully i am accomplishing that
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I have been going thru canon compliant wolfstar fics oldest to newest (like back to og wolfstar of the early 00) bc I’m a masochist 😋 🤞 and I’ve definitely noticed the shift in the way the majority of writers tag their fics. It’s interesting to see how much more frequently ppl use tags to begin with. Writers already make the conscious decision to warn ppl throughly about what it’s in their fics thru tags, and i honestly don’t think people should ever need to add need tw beyond tags sorry not sorry. I certainly don’t think everyone will agree with me, but sometimes I don’t want to know ever major plot point that in a chapter (which is why I usually skip them, but it’s hard bc I love reading the authors notes) Just read the tags, test it out if needed, and dip if it’s too much 🫠
yeahhhhh whenever i read older fics there really aren't like. warnings on each ch. bc tags are just assumed to be sufficient. which makes sense to me!!
and like i'm sympathetic to people who want tws--i'm someone who frequently spoils shit for myself bc i wanna know what happens, especially with like horror movies and stuff where i wanna know if i can stomach it. but it's about taking responsibility for ur own reading experience, y'know? like if i'm reading a fic and it gets to be too much for me, i just...stop reading. and accept the fact that the fic is not for me.
and from a writer perspective, it's like....on my longer fics i've tried to give a heads-up in ch notes, bc when i entered the fandom i got the impression that was the norm. but doing that takes extra time and work, and i don't always know what someone might find triggering. and like, if people reach out politely and ask me to add a tw for something that didn't occur to me, i'm usually happy to do so!
but like. idk man. when i was writing this cowboy fic i was just like....i do not feel like combing back through these chapters and trying to add in-depth warnings on every ch in addition to what i've already put in the tags lol. and now i'm writing a zombie fic, and even though i've tagged it for like gore and violence and blood and injury and it is literally a zombie apocalypse au, i still feel this sense of pressure to put notes at the beginning of chs, because so many people seem to just expect that!
anyway it's up to every writer individually to decide how many warnings they wanna put on a fic, but i definitely do wish that there was a way to like....backtrack to a time when the norm was gratitude for the fact that fics on ao3 even have tags in the first place + a sense that everyone is responsible for their own reading experience, rather than this sense of entitlement some people seem to have where they expect detailed warnings on every single ch :/
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4, 7 & 24 for the 🔥🔥 asks!
4. what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?
Tbh I don't have a last straw anymore. I use and abuse the block button liberally. If I see an annoying opinion, I block. Sometimes, I don't even finish reading the post because you usually can tell it's rancid from the first 2 lines.
I've blocked half a fandom at this point bc of the constant negativity. I simply don't care anymore. I'm here to have fun. If you take personal offense to that then that's your problem not mine.
7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?
Alngksgnw as you're said hate IS a strong word and I don't hate characters really unless there is a good reason for me to hate them.
So when I say I began to dislike Dorian Pavus after seeing how the fandom acted towards him, I don't hate him. I guess I do find him fascinating and relatable to an extent but I also don't think he's written perfectly as some people act like he is. Revisiting Dorian's quest as an adult with a fully developed brain and way more comfortable about my own queerness made me realize that I dislike how Dorian didn't really have agency whether to reconcile with his father or not. I know it's the point of The game to have a choice but Idk a bit more dialogue about the choice could've easily solved that problem for me.
I also have issues with Dorian's Indian coding lmao and have since felt like I was duped. It just feels like a cop-out? Like Gaider and team knew about the complaints people have about his comments wrt Asians in Thedas so they made him Asian—only mentioning it in a forum post or Twitter I think 🫠 so to this day ive seen people still surprised that he's Asian—without considering how to code him as Indian in the game.
Things like his clothing having some influences from the cultures in India or family structures and mannerisms. I mean it could be as simple as Indian coding the people of Quarinus so you don't just have this one Indian coded family in the entirety of Thedas. The Alexiuses could've also been Indian coded.
(An aside there's more layers to this like the unfortunate implications of coding a group of people who own slaves as poc but I could write a whole post about Dragon Age's attempts of trying to put Asians in this game)
Anyway, that's canon lol. Fandom makes this all worse. I could just point at the Orientalist depictions of Dorian in fanart and just end it here but nope it goes deeper. Somehow, Dorian attracted the worst kind of fandom. Like the Solas and Cullen stans maybe louder but I was there Gandalf. I was in the trenches. People were forming cliques around this one BNF and their friends. I was in the clique and it was all good until Tresspasser dropped.
You see this clique hated that Tresspasser ended with Dorian and the Inquisitor being in an LDR—because Dorian was off trying to fix a country—to the point where some of them acted like they broke up. Hello? Okay 1) That is such a poor reading on long distance relationships 2) Dorian...got a phone crystal for the Inquisitor, u know a tech that didn't exist in Thedas so they can stay in touch.
It also isn't enough that they didn't like it. Others have to Not like it as well. I remember talking to the BNF about my Inquisitor and Dorian, how they stayed in touch as Dorian was y'know trying to fix a country and the BNF told me that it was a depressing situation for my Inquisitor and Dorian...even though it isn't and they're perfectly happy.
(An side, not from this clique but I wouldnt be surprised if some of them also held this opinion but I saw some accusations from folks that Bioware is homophobic because Dorian and the Inquisitor are in an LDR. This is how batshit this fandom is).
Anyway, to keep it short, I was 19-20 when all of this happened. I probably said some stupid shit around that time but I should tell you these people were in their late 20s to early 30s. They were affected by a 19-20 year old with just a handful of followers saying stupid shit. They were so affected by the barely adult saying stupid shit that one of them stalked me, vagueposted about me and when I found out they were vagueposting about me, proceeded to gaslight me and told me I was the one stalking them. :)
Not only that, they also harassed one of my friends to not posting their fics ever again, harrassed a friend of a friend for trying to steal the BNF's spotlight 🙄. Come on some of you have fucking children.
I don't think I could look at Dorian in the same way which is a shame because for a time he was important to me but like God, it was rough.
I also have not forgotten nor forgave :) hence why I have the studio behind that chorus game or whatever it's called now blocked :) and would not be playing it. Do not care if David Gaider is the one writing it. I mean he kinda was the weakest link in that writing team imo (and I also hate his prose).
24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse
Very cliche but anything to do with the mages and templars
#elaine talks#im so SORRY about the essay lmao#im okay now though and ive generally put THAT incident behind me
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Duhragonba11
(That title looked cooler in my head for some reason.)
Hi, I'm Mike, and on December 21, 2012, I made the first post on this blog. It's nothing special, just a fandub video that always amused me. I didn't have any particular agenda with this thing, which is why I went with the name I chose.
I signed up for tumblr in 2011. Livejournal was dying, I had just moved to a new place and I was kind of looking for a fresh start. My main blog, @sodiumlamp, was my half-assed attempt to do a cool science themed blog. I thought you had to have a moody aesthetic on this site, because a lot of popular tumblrs posted black and white photos with wistful poetry and shit. I was burned out on """fandom""" and wanted to try to write something focused on a more general-interest topic. To be honest, I still want that, but it took a back seat as my priorities changed.
I created a few sideblogs, and decided the only thing I was missing was one for anime nonsense. It feels weird that I waited so long to go through with it, though. That first year or two on tumblr, I was kind of wary of the site, like I didn't know what to do with it, and I was worried I'd screw something up. Anyway, I broke my leg in the fall of 2012, and I spent about five months laid up at my parents' house. It was on the evening of December 20 that I made up my mind to set this thing up. Maybe I just couldn't settle on a name for the blog, or I wasn't sure I could post enough stuff to it to make it worth the trouble. My sleep schedule was a mess in those days, so it doesn't surprise me much that the first post was made in the middle of the night.
What really made this important for me was a post I made a few days later. I decided to just write about Raditz, and it got a lot of notes. Well, more than a hundred, which is kind of a big deal to me. There seemed to be an audience for this stuff, which led me to devote more and more time to this blog. Over the years, my other blogs have fallen by the wayside, and this became my main internet presence.
I don't think this thing is all that "big" in terms of popularity. I currently have 3957 followers, which sounds like a lot, although I usually only see 20-30 unique users in my activity reports. Still, it's a lot for me, and I'm grateful for it. I think things started to pick up in 2015, probably because of Xenoverse 1, Resurrection F, and Dragon Ball Super all starting up around that time. I got a lot of positive reinforcement from my audience, and that was a major factor that led to me getting back into writing fanfiction.
The Luffa concept was something I had been sitting on for years, but I never tried to write it because it seemed like too daunting a challenge, and even if I could finish a story like that, I wasn't sure anyone would bother to read it. But in 2015 I felt a lot more confident about giving it a shot. And people read it! They seemed to really like it! And in early December of that year, I even got fanart of the story.
(Art by @bluewavelengths)
It still blows my mind that this happened. It's eight years later, and I still find myself kind of averting my gaze when I look at this. Like, it's just sort of overwhelming. I really need to assemble some sort of gallery for Luffa art. I've got a folder with a lot of XV2 screencaps and loose drafts, and I'll run across this image from time to time and it always gets to me. Thank you, Nico.
So Luffa kind of took over a lot of this blog space from 2016 onward. I still felt like I should maintain some sort of general presence for an audience that wasn't interested in the character. I don't know if that makes sense or not, but that led me to kind of half-assedly liveblogging JoJo's Bizarre Adventure in 2017, which led me to three-quarter-assed liveblogs around the time I got to Stone Ocean and Steel Ball Run. That kind of set the stage for much of the stuff I do these days. Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z in 2019, Hellsing and Battle Tendency in 2021, and GT and Super in 2023. Well, I like to think I use my whole ass now when I liveblog these things, but I guess I should let history be the judge of that.
I'm not sure there's a coherent message to this. Honestly, I noticed back in January that I passed Year 10, and I thought I should really make a point of doing some sort of retrospective on the next anniversary, so here I am. I kind of debated making it a shitpost, or blowing it off altogether, but now that I've settled on revisiting the history of the blog, I feel like the common denominator here is that I can express myself and there are people who are interested in what I have to say. Every so often someone will tell me they liked something I wrote, and it's great. I'm not good at taking the compliment, but it's still gratifying to know that someone actually paid attention long enough to go "Yeah, he's got a good point." That matters. It matters a lot. If you're reading this, thank you.
I don't know what the future holds. I mean, I'm gonna keep posting stuff here, but for all I know Tumblr will get sold to Yahoo again and go out of business. In the short term, I still have fic work to do, and I've got a lot of messages in my ask box that I need to get back to. Also I'm gonna try to watch Evangelion next year, and reread Jojolion now that it's finished, and see if it makes more sense. Other than that, we'll see.
Serious question: Did I coin the term "Knife Lady"? Like, other people call her that now, but I think I may have been the one to get that started. Maybe I'm kidding myself, but it's fun to think about sometimes. I just don't want to steal fandom valor from the actual inventor of "we should all call that Saiyan 'Knife Lady'." But if it really was me, then that's pretty cool.
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yessss do all of them. For gensh <3
(I had to take this off of the official numbered list because my rambles are just too rambly, and tumblr started yelling at me......)
1.) my beautiful cinnamon roll too good for this world fave: Bennett!! Bennett, Bennett, Bennett, I choose Bennett-- Also Chongyun and Freminent. Somft boys. Doing their best. Also could kick your ass. Also I have all of them. :3c (...Very sad that I had to take Chongyun off my main team, because Bennett's about to C6 and render him useless.)
2.) my trash-shit fave: I have no idea what this means, but I'm gonna guess that Dottore and Scaramouche belong here-- Especially Dottore; he's the guy giving me the MOST brainworms right now. (But I can't share most of the brainworms because I'd have to explain all the reasons why my version of him turned out the way he did, then be told I'm wrong anyway, so.)
Anyways, I love Scaramouche/Wanderer's entire story, I love that he Has Problems but those problems aren't JUST that he's a little asshole bitch for no reason like fandom keeps trying to claim.
Also I want!! Playable Dottore!! I want him so bad. Sure sure, to some people having him redeemed would be soooooo boring, but- Personally, I only have a certain amount of fun with villains that are villains for the evulz, and I LOVE characters with Potential (potential for both better and worse, sometimes even for the same reasons); also a lot of certain little details about Dottore gives me the vibes that he isn't the one-note crazy man basically everyone writes him as, which is apparently, supposedly backed up by the actual og Chinese writing of a few things.
And I genuinely think that ANY way they go about redeeming him/making him playable -- be it revealing Tragic Backstory reasons, or a begrudging process, or "well I've decided I like and respect you, so sure, I'll behave, for now >:)" -- would be interesting no matter what they go for!!
...I'm genuinely gonna cry a bit if they do opt to just kill him off ;v; but if Gensh goes that route, I do hope it's at least to an epic boss fight or something. Full monster transformation, if possible.
3.) my I love to hate them fave: God, I have no idea, I'm not usually the type outside of very specific characters. I guess Signora might qualify? ...I'm not gonna earn much love with that one-- She's just, like...tragic backstory? Check. Pretty lady with beautiful theming and massive tits? Check. Front-story bitch? Yeah that's pretty fun! ...Why is it so hard to force her character to shift in writeys. Like, even thinking about alternate ways events could go on my own, it's like...she owns her own girlboss so hard, it borders on Ungrateful behavior (which tends to be one of the few kinds of behaviors characters can have that grind on my nerves). Apparently there's a chance she might get revived in Natlan, and honestly I'm hoping. I don't think it'll be the worst thing in the world if it doesn't happen, but I sure would like the excuse to put her back in the oven to bake some more, without having to wait for my brain to become actually hooked on her to do it.
4.) my I hate to love them fave: This one's gonna sound weird; Faruzan. ...Okay, okay, let me explain- So, y'all know how Faruzan had a boosted drop rate when Wanderer was first released? (...And I think it happened again when his banner came back around, but that's not important--) I was. SO. DAMN. DESPERATE. to get Wanderer. I had picked out a name for him months in advance (well, tentatively; some leaks a friend was looking at said you could name him, and I wasn't 100% convinced but I wanted to be PREPARED in case it really was true, and then it was!), both of my friends (including Devoid here <3) were pulling for him as well, and both got him before I did, which intensified my desire to get him. I had been saving up. I was doing SO MANY TEN PULLS. And I got. SO. MANY. FARUZANS. I think I had one ten pull that was, like, four Faruzans in a row. I had her C6'd extremely early on into my pulls, and then she just kept showing up. It was driving me mad.
I don't really get too bothered by a character's in-game actions unless they're a specific kind of irksome, but messing with my pulls? That bothers me a lot-- Eventually I did get Wanderer, but I'd also gotten like...twenty or forty Faruzans in the process or something like that. It was ridiculous. And I was all set to just hate her forever.
...But then, like...her hangout comes out and that was really good. And then the event with Wanderer, Kaveh, Tighnari, and everyone happened, and THAT was also really good, and she's so affectionate towards Collei and hnnnnnn...Why's she have to be such a good character with such great taste in other characters?? Save me--
5.) my I wouldn’t piss on them if they were on fire non-fave: So, you know how I said that character actions don't tend to bother me outside of certain traits? Fucking. Royce. I hate Royce. I mean- I view Benny's entire ex-team rather unfavorably, but Royce's "almost-has-a-realization-just-to-backtrack-and-yell-at-Benny-again" behavior drives me up the goddamn wall. I'm sure there's other NPCs that piss me off but no one else I can remember by actual actions or name. I do have some playable characters I don't really like at all, but this category is very strongly worded for those feelings.
(No hate to any Royce fans out there >////////< And also apologies, but this is probably the only time I'm gonna talk about him anyway, at least by name)
6.) my I didn’t care about them either way at first but the fandom makes such a big deal about them now I can’t stand them non-fave: I've been avoiding most fandom content precisely for this reason!! (...Unfortunately I've still gotten exposed to a bunch of shitty fan takes, but it for the most part hasn't shaken my character opinions much. My ship opinions however...)
...The most popular takes of Scaramouche and Dottore (by fans and non-fans alike) have only further solidified my personal vibes of wanting them more sympathetic and avoiding one-note portrayals like the plague. Signora has been on thin ice for a while because so many people are really fucking aggravating in regards to her, but she's yet to budge because I do feel mildly compelled about her. So hopefully that sticks.
But I WILL absolutely despise Capitano out of sheer fan spite if he's revealed to be the 1st Harbinger, and there's a ~secret 10th Harbinger~, that is just, like...It's almost kinda neat, but so many people are being so bullheaded and shitty about it (mostly on reddit, I think), to the point it's invaded the wiki that I otherwise really respect for all the work that goes into it, that he just better fucking be the 10th or I will be UPSET.
7.) my I could take them or leave them kinda non-fave: Honestly, most of the cast. Up until about Sumeru, I really only cared about 2-5 characters per nation. Then with Sumeru and Fontaine, they've really knocked it out of the park with characters I absolutely adore and only one or two that kinda just fade out of my memory. I won't say which ones.
!!!!!! IMPORTANT NOTE!! This has nothing to do with writing quality or design quality or "oh my subjective opinion is absolute fact and anyone who disagrees with me is a dumb stupid idiot with no taste" or anything like that- It's just that I wasn't vibing too strongly with most characters; not for any necessary particular reason or failure on Mihoyo's part or anything like that. Just how it turned out.
8.) my I will go down with this ship and I won’t put my hands up and surrender, there will be no white flag above my door. I’m in love and always will be fave ship: Dottore x Scaramouche is my BIGGEST ship right now, especially onesided. Especially reluctantly reciprocated. Primarily on Dottore's side. Also Fem Traveler/Lumine/Lillian x Everyone. Also Enjou x his weird "go ahead and beat me up" fetish-- Keep being funky you strange, fiery demon man. Love him. (Also Alhaitham x Kaveh, though I generally don't like looking at the fandom art for it unless my friend handpicks out the art for me, because their ver of Kaveh did irreversible damage to my brain and now when I see trans!Alhaitham and cis!Kaveh, my brain gets SO CONFUSED. It's just like "????? But that should be reversed, tho, obviously???" Like...no brain...it's not obvious. It's fine. You're just Attached.)
9.) my dirtybadwrong fave ship: Apparently Scaramouche/Kabukimono x Niwa is real controversial, which is very sad because I fucking love it, and also it seems like such an obvious and easy-to-like pick to me :P Also Kaeya x Diluc, which I know would/will? get me headhunted if this post shows up for the majority of the fandom. I'm probably forgetting a good amount of ships at the moment, but... (+ Bonus for both 8 and 9, but my extra myriad of Dottore ships where I'd probably have to explain how I ended up where I ended up, which means I'd have to explain the way I write Dottore, which means I'd have to explain-)
...Also Neuvillette x Furina APPARENTLY fucking qualifies, because as we all know, if the girl is short and cute and femme, she's automatically a child!! :) Don't y'all totes know she's Neuvillette's little baby girl daughter and not an adult and totally wasn't RUNNING AN ENTIRE NATION AS THEIR ARCHON for LITERAL FUCKING CENTURIES? Nope! Neuvillette, the person that totally wasn't working under her that entire time, has all the power in that dynamic, and totes sees her as a daughter, so it's problematic!!
10.) my they’re cute together and I dig them but I’m not all that terribly invested kinda fave ship: Most ships in the fandom, tbh. See- the problem is I don't really like protag Aether takes, and I'm just amicable to about 70% of the cast. And I might be a massive multishipping slut with few standards, but I do need to Feel Something towards characters to then Feel Something towards the ships, and when the general vibes I have with a character is "ah, they're neat" or "I like 'em well enough" or even "I don't really like them", that's just the kind of ~amicable vibes~ that lends to me going "that's cute! ...Anyway"
11.) my I didn’t care about this ship either way at first but the fandom makes such a big deal about it now I can’t stand it non-fave ship: Well, I have two. I won't say one because I think my vaguing gets more obvious if I say it outright, but someone I was following seriously bashed [ship I like a lot] while going "why dont people like THIS ship instead??? It's WAY BETTER!!", and. lemme tell you. If you want me to UTTERLY DESPISE your fave character or ship, the best way to do that is praise your fave while bashing another character or ship!! Fuck me, it doesnt even have to be a character or ship I even like, but for some reason it always fucking is. Like the sheer amount of people that go "Why dont people like [character] more??? They're much better than ITTO!!" like. 1. fuck you. 2. Itto has a MUCH LOUDER presence than whatever character you're trying to praise. 3. why does everyone always try to go after [specific ship I like a lot], or Itto? It's always them. Like they're making some big sweeping statement of "oh THAT dumb thing is getting attention for no reason!!" when like...entertainment factor, you knuckleheads. They're just onscreen and instantly make an impression. I'm really, really sorry your fave doesn't get as much attention, I get it, I really do, I've had barely popular/outright bashed faves before, but y'all actively hurt your case rather than helping it when you try to tear other characters/ships down to build yours up. I get that you're frustrated, but it's not fucking helping. Cut that shit out and then get back to me.
Anyways.
The other one that bothers the shit out of me for far more petty reasons is Wriothesley x Neuvillette, which. I feel bad about, to be fair. I feel sorta guilty for not liking it, because it definitely has potential. There's just one problem-- one of my biggest fucking pet peeves is ship bashing/attempted ship sinking (-gestures at my sarcasm a bit earlier-, which also sums up half of why I despise "child-coding" and "oh!! this small girl character is TOTES the daughter to these two gay men and definitely not responsible or mature in her own right uwu totally needs to be babysat by her two gay dads!!") in conjunction with people obsessing over other ships, and with Wriotheo and Nuevy, it started BEFORE the update happened and we actually saw any interactions. Like. I get it. They're two hot men and gay ships are hella popular. But with it occurring way before the update, thus way before any canonical interactions, it just felt like people were fucking desperate to make sure neither character could be straight-shipped with the two "children" they were actually working with (two full-ass adults, Furina and Sigewinne), which just drives me up the fucking wall. (And I can understand being uncomfortable with shipping characters that kinda resemble children, but I've seen way too many people go above and beyond any reasonable reaction to that sorta thing.)
I want to like this ship. I really do. It could definitely be really good. But it's gonna take, like, a year or two, when we're in Snezhnaya and my frustration becomes a petty dumb memory instead of something I want to rant over.
(...I'm sure this is gonna come back to bite me pretty hard, 'cause if this post makes the rounds people are gonna rush to be like "oh you're not OPPRESSED by gay ships!!" -> No one ever says they are unless they're a real smooth-brained fuckhead, "Oh, so we can't just have fun anymore??" -> I'm apparently not allowed to have fun, so neither are y'all. :\ If I can take fifty-million fans constantly trying to call me a terrible person for liking any of the ships and characters and takes I like, y'all can take one "this got on my nerves and I'm still mad even though I know it's dumb and petty")
12.) my MAKE IT STOP non-fave ship: Ready for me to burn another bridge? ...Can't stand Yae Miko x Raiden Shogun. Like- I see it, I absolutely see it, and I think it absolutely works, but. well. guess what? Guess that happened?? Shitty fans. Shitty fans that INSIST Yae Miko is canonically a man-hating lesbian and froth at the mouth if you dare even imply she MIGHT be the tiniest bit interested in a guy. I can't quite articulate how much I HAAAAATE when people try to claim their headcanon as canon and then treat other fans like shit for "violating canon" (that doesn't actually exist -- and god, even if it did, some of the behavior I've seen really goes above and beyond any realm of acceptability), and yeah. This is one of the biggest offenders. In general, I've noticed way more vitriol and toxicity out of f/f fans than any other kind of fan lately, and that is...ugh. again, I get it. Out of the ship combinations, f/f is probably the least popular in general and all that, and when you feel like your favorite stuff is getting passed over again and again for stuff you can't see the appeal in (trust me, I can relate, I've been in a LOT of fandoms), it's really, really frustrating. But also can we stop being shitty to other fans over subjective opinions? Fandom's supposed to be fun. I shouldn't feel like every other fan I follow would hate my guts over the pettiest of preference differences. (Yes this goes for more than just f/f fans, ofc, it's just those are the ones I've noticed the most recently.)
!!! -> Please don't feel bad about liking any of the ships I listed ;v; For any reason-- I did Not put them down to shame anyone, and I don't judge anyone for liking ships and characters I don't like. I do judge behavior towards other fans, and if someone's really hostile to "competing" ships/characters, that also bothers me, but that's it. It's not the content itself that has or will ever bother me, so I really do hope no one who's reading this feels bad about their preferences...
->-> Primarily Unrelated but
One thing that I lovehate about this, aside from the fact that if a bunch of people see this entire thing I'm DEFINITELY getting hatemail/a callout/something, but it also gives the impression I'm massively into m/m, which is amusing and frustrating at the same time. (Not the first time this sort of thing has happened, and I'm always self-conscious about it, because I hate when people have Incorrect Takes about my feelings/opinions, especially when I've openly described them but the other person's like "lol nope, I associate you with this more, so this is the truth now". Hate that shit.)
I'm actually primarily a m/f shipper (which honestly might be more controversial on tumblr, specifically tumblr, I'm not an ignorant dumbass about other places on the internet), that's just not how it turned out for Gensh, where I wound up mostly into the guy characters. Before I got extremely into Scaramouche (and then Dottore), Lumine/Lillian was my primary favorite character and the one I was focused on shipping with.
She was also, like...the female character I liked the most, which I'm given to understand is an odd thing to say, I guess? Because western people don't usually like the protags of games?? Which is so weird to me. (<- Fresh off the Persona fandom where the Persona protags are also in my, like, top 5 characters of their respective games, and that is a hugely unpopular take for some reason.)
(Though I guess I'm pretty weird in how I tend to play games and develop the protagonist's personality in my head + I usually prefer to play the fem character -> the fem protag of a game tends to be in my top 10 favorite characters)
For anyone curious, my preferences go m/f -> f/f -> m/m (least favorite), but that is also extremely arbitrary because of a few different factors, but primarily because I will write basically anything and everything. If I'm writing it and I'm having fun, then nothing bothers me, and I'll come up with all sorts of ships for all sorts of reasons. (Usually ships occur on a whim during rps, which then makes it hard to explain how I got to that result outside of rps...)
Anyways, I hope I explained my reasonings well enough m(_ _)m
I could definitely ruffle more feathers if I, like, posted a character tier list or something, and I'm kinda tempted anyway, because...I dunno, a tiny part of my brain is like "hehe, stick it to the man >:3c", I guess? Despite the fact I would definitely not be actually "sticking it" to anyone, like
If no one cared what I thought before, they're super not gonna care after this--
#ask game#devoidofdog#chaos opinions#the whole thing with Dottore (before anyone says anything about “oh you like DOTTORE stuff but not xyz?”)#the whole thing y'gotta understand#is that i've been utterly enraptured by evil doctors and mad scientists basically since...since kind of forever#Sailor Moon S DBZ Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde Spider-man The Suffering Pokemon and i could keep going on and on and on#and to some extent i feel like i fucking ghostwrote Dottore in like...#“even with the most evil most vile take this is still a character i absolutely would have written”#the only reason i wasnt instantly hooked on him is because i spent a portion of my hyperfixation unaware of his existence#once i knew about him it was ON-SIGHT#that's just a specific-to-me kinda thing#also “hey Chaos that's a lot of pre-assuming responses and trying to pre-counter them. wtf is up with that?”#well dear hypothetical reader i have been on tumblr for a VERY LONG TIME and i've seen lots of people get VERY ANGRY for lots of reasons#so if im already going to be rambling i might as well add elaborations and qualifiers and try to make my stances clear#for anyone reading me in any kind of good faith#if anyone's determined enough to read in very bad faith then there's not much i can do#(especially with a lot of my ship opinions which are Not Good To Have in the current fandom climate)#but i'd still like to try#as an aside i swear i am a Certified Villain Lover i just generally get way more motivated about villains with Potential For Good/Tragedy#than i do with villains for the evulz#like. i do have some unrepentant faves and i love them a lot but that's just usually not where my vibes lie#and yes im fairly passive aggressive in this in regards to that but it's because im still butthurt about#1. people trying to reduce the entire Wanderer storyline to literally nothing because either they dont get it or they stopped listening#and 2. i've seen WAY too many people lately complaining about gensh villains being “too nice” and tbh i#am so fucking done with people that are UPSET there's redeemable villains in fucking anything#i know it was the hip cool thing to complain about in SU but also i could still count the amount of stories where#everyone evil gets redeemed instead of dying on like. one hand.#and that shit still doesnt qualify for GENSHIN. YOU KILL A LOTTA FUCKERS IN GENSHIN AND LOTS ARE UNREPENTANT#tumblr ate the rest of my tags so if i decide to talk about this more it'll be in a different post :(
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Hmm OK I'm about to just direct bitch about something I read in a tag and I'm aware that that's unkind but it's such a weird take to me, I feel like I need to express my thoughts
So, this is what they said:
This feels so strange to me. Broadly:
This isn't boring neutral coworker stuff, it's direct antagonism and also they kind of aren't friends?
They're relationship is antagonistic right now specifically because of whats happened in other series - so, not a lack of continuity but the opposite
The fandom point is bizarre in a number of ways
So Number 1, what we've been seeing between Sam and T'Challa in this series so far (since issue 1 let's be clear) is T'Challa being a dick to Sam unprompted. He's condescending to him and generally being prickly, and Sam clearly bothered by it. This is actually kind of fun to read, in particular T'Challa's insistence on calling him "Sam" only - it's interesting, T'Challa is intensely bothered by this one guy in a way that is kind of more intimate than their early encounters.
And, yeah, I don't think they've ever been friends necessarily. They've worked together a lot of times. They seem to like each other. Sam seems to really look up to and respect T'Challa, and T'Challa seems charmed by and impressed by Sam. But they weren't close by any means - they don't hang out outside of work etc. What we're seeing here is that same dynamic turned a little dark, purely because T'Challa is being a dick.
Also, unless something goes horribly wrong here on the writing side of things, it's clear that this antagonism is a plot thread that's been set up, currently expanded upon and will be resolved in the series. It's there on purpose and hopefully will end with them closer than before... and if not that, it will at least end with them putting this shit behind them (again, so long as the writing doesn't completely collapse behind the scenes which does happen in comics a lot lol)
Number 2, I agree that they seem to have forgotten that T'Challa made Sam's original wings, and actually also made his current get up, or at least the shield. I'd love for them to talk about that.
That said, I think you could bring it up in a way that compliments the current drama. Sam is indebted to tchalla, it's part of why he respects him so much, but also might make him pull his punches when the guy is being a dick... or does he? Maybe t'challa thinks he ought to, but maybe Sam doesn't care.
So, currently in canon, Wakanda is experimenting with a more democratic system, and T'Challa is having a personal crisis. He's still being the Black Panther, but in a more secretive, quasi-exiled way, and he's having difficulties reconciling his identity as his nations hero with not being their leader - he feels untethered. His current series (by eve ewing) is about this and it's good, I recommend. But, in short, he's more grumpy than usual because he's having the least relatable personal crisis of all time.
In symbol of truth, tchalla picks a fight with Sam (instead of just talking about how Sam mostly accidentally broke some wakandan laws). Sam is there in jeans and a t-shirt ((no suit, no wings, no shield) and wins.
This is, presumably, humiliating for t'challa, and he is canonically very pissy about it. You could imagine that the fact that he made Sam's gear could add to this dynamic. Sam wasn't reverent to him, didn't perform gratitude and then had the audacity to prove that he didn't really need his help anyway.
But yes, this is why T'Challa feels this way, its why he's acting like this. This is absolutely continuous with current canon. It's not an inconsistency. It just makes sense in universe.
Now, if you'd rather they just didn't write this drama because you'd rather they dropped this thread and just portrayed them as friends, then say that. Like, that's a completely valid opinion idk why you wouldn't just say it instead of acting like it's inconsistent writing when it isn't.
Number 3 is where I am confused. So, no one cares what anyone says on tumblr, that's a freebie. For twitter, yes sometimes writers do listen to fans in ways that end up not working out but is this person seriously suggesting that some writer would deliberately make a series worse to appease fans of other series? Think about that for a second. No one is sitting at a desk going "aha! I'll make the series bad, that'll show em!".
Not that I actually think the series is bad but you get my point.
So, the Fantastic Four are literally family. X-teams tend to be a mixture of family, found family and coworkers. This is true for avengers teams to, although they often have a greater percentage of coworkers who don't really know each other. This is because the x-men more often live together, and are often formed out of necessity because the humans are trying to kill them. The avengers are more often literally co-workers; a bunch of individual heroes, with separate lives, often living planets away from each other, individually recruited to a constructed team. Like, that's fine. That's not anti-avenger propaganda from fantastic four fans, it's just the literal canon situation a lot of the time.
This particular team has two people who used to be married to each other, then a bunch of people with varying degrees of familiarity and friendship. Two of them are currently having drama, and it's arguably the most emotional they've ever been about each other. This sounds like a good thing to me! This kind of storyline is what takes two characters from coworkers to something more meaningful, you know?
It's a particularly weird complaint to bring up with Sam. In the MCU, Sam is very much an avenger, was in the team for years and a pivotal part of it. In the comics, he comes and goes, joined to replace hawkeye then quit, led them for a bit in the 2010s (but that was mostly a different team) then quit again.. etc.. He seems to have a difficult relationship with the concept, and is only occasionally actually friends with these people (Steve, Jane). Honestly, it feels ooc when he's portrayed as friendly with some of them. But I mention it because he's a weird character to focus on to make this point.
Anyway, the series has gone out of its way to portray closeness between tony and carol, who do actually have a deeper friendship than many of the others here. But for most of these dynamics, the groundwork is there, but if you want them to be portrayed as close friends or a found family or whatever, then that actually needs to be developed in, you know, storylines. You can't just dump them on a team and say "they're besties now".
You might, in fact, want to write something where the current situations that the characters are in, and their recent interactions, affect the way they treat each other. Idk. Maybe even with some cattiness and antagonistic banter? And then maybe let that play out? Idk it's just a thought
#it's not even that I disagree that the series could have more warmth#but i wrote an essay anyway#because i'm like this i guess
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𝘒𝘕𝘖𝘞𝘐𝘕𝘎 𝘠𝘖𝘜𝘙 𝘗𝘈𝘙𝘛𝘕𝘌𝘙 𝘞𝘌𝘓𝘓 𝘊𝘈𝘕 𝘗𝘖𝘛𝘌𝘕𝘛𝘐𝘈𝘓𝘓𝘠 𝘔𝘈𝘒𝘌 𝘞𝘙𝘐𝘛𝘐𝘕𝘎 𝘛𝘖𝘎𝘌𝘛𝘏𝘌𝘙 𝘈 𝘓𝘖𝘛 𝘌𝘈𝘚𝘐𝘌𝘙.
REPOST DO NOT REBLOG !!
NAME: Sev
PRONOUNS : She/They!
PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION : Mostly Discord, but I can do tumblr too if needed/preferred
NAME OF MUSE(s) : Akira Kurusu! (For this blog anyway; if you wanted Discord we'd be here a while lmao)
EXPERIENCE / HOW LONG ( MONTHS / YEARS? ) : RP, since 2013-ish. My first-ever blog was made around there, and I've been RPing ever since, but I've been writing for a good few years before that. I'd saaaay maybe four or five? I can't check since I deleted all my oldest stuff, but it's around there.
BEST EXPERIENCE : In general, I'd say an RP I did with a pair of friends from another fandom with another muse from years ago - where my muse was being chased down by a worried friend after having run away (after either hurting them or BEING hurt, can't recall), and was offered a deal with the demon sin of Gluttony, which he took and has since forever regretted - that one took until 4am and was one of my favorites~ I don't think I've had something that's made me stay up that late just to get more of it, since.
RP PET PEEVES / DEALBREAKERS : I definitely hate when people control my character - taking them and making them act or move more than just briefly describing them taking a thing in a plot/thread where we both know they're gonna take the thing.
One dealbreaker I have though - Guilt trips. I've had people do this to me before where for whatever reason, I didn't really wanna thread something - either the thread itself wasn't something I wanted to do or I just plain didn't vibe with their muse and made an effort to tell them as politely as possible that I didn't think my muse would be able to interact well, if at all, with theirs.
And always, ALWAYS the response would be them going to their blog, and vague-posting about me and how I should be writing with THEM if I wanted to rp so bad, as well as people guilting me into refollowing them after deciding I didn't want to follow them after all, usually for the above reasons of 'my muses won't gel with theirs after all, whoops'.
Basically - if you knowingly, intentionally, try to leverage my anxiety as a means to keep me interacting with you, you can consider me gone. For good.
MUSE PREFERENCES FLUFF, ANGST OR SMUT : Fluff and angst are both amazing. Smut... Technically I'm okay with smut as a concept, but given the characters here are early-20's at best, and canonically in the range of 17, I do not want it on my blog in any capacity. I will block you if you try.
Romance is fine, don't get me wrong! I love doing soft fluffy romance~! But I ain't doing no sideways tango shit with anyone but my old Layton buddies, because all our muses there are grown men and women in their 30's and 40's at LEAST.
PLOTS OR MEMES : Plots. I am... extraordinarily bad at writing non-serious stuff. Even when I TRY to do sillies, they always come out serious. Sigh.
LONG OR SHORT REPLIES : I can do both! Buuuut if we thread a thread long enough my replies WILL steadily grow stupid long. I don't know why. It just... happens... ;w;
BEST TIME TO WRITE : Any time! All time! As long as I'm awake! I have endless free time due to being pretty damn unhireable due to a perfect storm of people-based social anxiety, poor memory, and inability to develop marketable skills!
But yes - I'm awake and online pretty regularly any time between 9am and 12am Newfoundland time.
ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S) : God I wish. I do channel a little bit of myself into them, and I wouldn't be surprised if that shows, but I'm nothing like Akira, nor any of his au's I've got in here. Don't have enough spine for that, lmao.
TAGGED BY : Stolen from @soulsbetrayed!
TAGGING : Go ham, my darlings
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ok so here's why throwing Fae Lore into spn makes a revival/continuation possible
Here's the setup:
-"Blurrywife" is a Faerie, specifically a malevolent/vampiric one, definitely a Succubus type. The mimes are her human thralls, hence why they don't act like normal vampires.
-Baby, yes the car, is ALSO a Faerie, specifically a kind of shapeshifter called a Pooka. John captured her in the early 80s, and, being John Winchester, never told his kids about this.
-Chuck Won. duh???
-Jack is, and was always destined to be, the next Jack O' The Lantern, and after Chuck threw his flaming corpse out Heaven, he's been ruling his own spoopy little candy-coated afterlife. pumpkin boi
Here's the timeline:
-Blurrywife & Mime Crew are kidnapping kids, likely for The Fae's 7-year tithe of souls to Hell (a thing that exists in the lore), when the Winchesters show up. Sam & Dean, as usual, have NO idea how to identify or fight Fae, and get their asses handed to them, with Dean falling to some weird Gaelic cold-iron magic fuckery (points to Blurrywife & crew for figuring out how to fight with iron despite being unable to touch it. 10/10 fuck these guys tho fr)
-Sam, alone and grieving, is an easy target and she picks him off before he even gets to the car, taking (something close to) Eileen's form and trapping him in a dreamscape, similar to how Djinn attack in spn.
-Sam, Dean AND Baby (there's def some Fae Drama going on there, yikes) have been stuck the Fae Realms for THREE YEARS as of Nov 2023.
-Dean and Baby escaped at some point, staying with Jack for a bit before running off to the 1970s like a dumbass and getting EVERYONE, including Jack and Bobby (why is Bobby even here??? HOW DID BOBBY'S GHOST GET STUCK IN THE FAE REALMS WHAT DID HE *DO*) recaptured.
-Sam has had it much worse, being drained to a white-haired husk of his former self and left for dead within a few days/months. DJ is half-faerie, raised in the fae realms, and could be 3 years old or 50, who knows. I don't like thinking abt how he happened.
-Here's the setup for the continuation:
Dean (fairly intact besides the cursed stab wound in his back) escapes with Sam (nearly dead, white-haired, displaying more or less the typical signs of someone who was taken & drained of life by The Fae) and stumbles into Charlie's safehouse. the Fae Arc can continue from this point, w Baby's true nature being revealed, Blurrywife as a major antagonist/BBEG, DJ going from possible threat -> clearly a well-meaning and very brave kid -> newest Winchester family member who Sam fully accepts as his son (plus s4-cas-esque moments as DJ tries to adapt to living on Earth. DJ ilysm but most cars aren't sentient and you can't bring your longbow to community college)
also Cas is still in The Empty, and Jack & Bobby are still captured, so that's some major plot points right there
Destiel is canon.
...anyway, this is all still pretty convoluted, but it allows for:
-15x20 to have been "not real" without being retconned
-DJ to exist without either setting the continuation ~30 yrs in the future (how would that work), or repeating spnwin's time-travel-kid-ex-machina (that's just not good writing I'm sry)
-spn finally doing something w The Fae (& related lore) besides one-off eps
-human!impala as main character
-explanations of weird shit in the finale (rebar, vamp-mimes, etc)
-collective fandom catharsis at Blurrywife's bitch ass
-the full horror potential of a faceless woman in a long dress standing ominously in the corner while time blurs forward around you and you age to death in five minutes
-some VERY fun metacommentary & crossover easter eggs if you use certain bits of Fae lore
-still works w my other big finale theory/revival idea/if-they-dont-do-this-i-will-be-so-pissed, which is the whole Deanmon 2.0 thing. but that's a post unto itself.
(also yes. making Blurrywife a djinn IS simpler and requires 0 new lore and makes perfect sense in canon. however, I hate how djinn are portrayed in spn. it feels vaguely racist and makes me uncomfy to write/read. so um that's why I didn't do that)
#good lord i havent posted like this in YEARS#the revival rumors unlocked something* in me#*the need to scream these postcanon hcs into the void for as long as possible until an actual canon continuation replaces it#supernatural#gone from “i need to find a way to fix this bc the show wont even start again”#to “its gonna start again and oh fuck I'm overattached to what I wrote”
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In The Bleak Midwinter
Set in Winter, Year 1. Dawn gives Elliott the first of many pomegranates. Literary chit-chat and Dawn’s backstory ensue.
TW for discussions of past ableism.
Dawn stomped the snow off of her boots as she entered the library, opening her backpack to pull out the books she’d brought. “Here you go,” she said as she set them on the counter.
Gunther frowned at them. “Where did you find these?”
“In the dirt,” Dawn said, waving her hand vaguely. “I cleaned them off the best I could, but I think they’ve been buried for a while.”
“Well, thank you for bringing them here,” Gunther said as he leafed through them, his brow furrowing as he saw the sorry state of some of the pages.
Dawn’s eyes darted to the right as she began to edge away from the desk. She peeked past the shelves, hoping that Elliott was here, as he often was on winter afternoons. Sure enough, he was seated by a bookshelf, his nose buried deep in a book.
“I’m just gonna check out the collection,” Dawn muttered as she wandered off in Elliott’s direction. She moved slowly, meandering her way towards him as she hoped that it wasn’t too obvious that he was the main reason she’d come here. She made a little more noise as she approached him, adjusting her backpack and clearing her throat when she was a few steps away. Sure enough, he looked up, his mouth curving into a small smile when he saw her.
“Hello Dawn,” he said. “What are you doing here?”
“Just dropping off some books I found,” she replied. “And—oh, while I’m here—I have something for you.”
She set her backpack on the floor and dug inside, praying that the fruit hadn’t been crushed. Dawn had been extra careful today, but the best-laid plans often went awry, especially with someone as klutzy as her.
Her hand closed around the fruit and she breathed an internal sigh of relief as she pulled the unpunctured pomegranate from her backpack. “Here,” she said as she handed it to him.
His brow furrowed. “How did you find this? It’s the middle of winter.”
“Fruit bats,” she said. “They leave things behind in my cave sometimes and I thought this might be something you like.”
Elliott’s hands closed around the fruit, a grin spreading across his face. “Dawn, this is a wonderful gift!” he said. “Thank you.”
She shrugged, trying not to show how pleased she was with his reaction. “I’m glad you like it,” she said. “Otherwise I’d need to find some other way to lure you to the underworld.”
Elliott chuckled at that. “So you’re a fan of mythology?” he asked.
“Oh, I adore it,” she said. “I was gonna major in it for my bachelor’s—or something close, like Classics or English—but that didn’t pan out.”
Elliott’s brow furrowed. “Why not?” he said. “If you don’t mind me asking.”
“Not at all,” Dawn said as she sat down beside him. “The plan was to get my associate’s at community college and then transfer to a four-year university for my bachelor’s. I was all ready for my first semester and it was great...for a whole two days. Then it all went to shit. I couldn’t focus, I was fucking up deadlines, and half the time I didn’t bring the right notebook to class. I flunked out at the end of the semester.”
She looked away from Elliott as she continued. “I thought I was just dumb and lazy, but my parents knew something was up. I wasn’t top of my class in high school, but I did all right and they never had to get on my case about schoolwork. Long story short, appointments happened, assessments happened, and I was diagnosed with ADHD.”
She ventured a glance up at Elliott, who was listening attentively, showing no signs of shock or distaste at her revelation. “But you went back to school, I assume?” he asked.
Dawn nodded. “I started at a different school next fall with the same plan,” she said. “I thought it’d be great—my meds were working well and I had accommodations that’d make taking tests easier for me—but that’s because I assumed that people would actually follow those.”
“But isn’t ignoring someone’s accommodations against school policy?” he asked. “And the law?”
“Oh yeah,” Dawn said. “Massive ADA violation. But it was a small school where most of the administration wanted to be somewhere else, so they didn’t give a whole lot of fucks about a freshman with an invisible disability. I got most of my profs to let me take my exams in a quiet room—which is what they were supposed to do anyways—but some of them didn’t. My fucking stats professor said he didn’t think I needed the quiet room because it always looked like I was paying attention in class, so I was probably just faking so I could cheat.”
“He actually said that?” Elliott asked, his eyes wide in horror.
“Yep,” Dawn replied. “I cried for hours that night because I started wondering if I was actually faking it. Never mind that I spent five hours being evaluated by a trained professional to make sure I actually had ADHD and not something else.”
“Where do they find these people?” Elliott muttered.
“The trash, presumably.”
Elliott laughed. “I can’t say I disagree,” he said. “Anyone who’d treat a student like that sounds like a pile of human refuse.”
“You can say that again,” Dawn replied. “Anyways, my mythology professor was the only one who actually did more than the bare minimum to help me and who helped me figure out what ways of studying and taking notes worked for me. She let me write an essay instead of doing a final exam, which was a huge help because I didn’t have to deal with the noisy exam room. We stayed in touch after I graduated and she even writes to me sometimes.”
Elliott reached out to lay a hand on her knee. “Well, I’m glad that there was someone who recognized how brilliant you are.”
“Aw, you’re sweet,” she said, ducking her head to hide the blush making its way up her neck. “I’m really not, though. I just got lucky that someone with a little compassion offered a class on my childhood hyperfixation.”
“Hmm,” he mused. “So I suppose you getting your associate’s was luck? And you managing to turn an unused plot of land into a thriving farm in less than a year is also luck?”
“Well yeah,” she said. “That and people helping me along. I wouldn’t even have the farm if it wasn’t for my grandfather.”
“But you’re the one who turned it into something again, Dawn,” he said, looking her directly in the eyes. “Without your planning and hard work, it would still be just an overgrown plot of land.”
“Okay fine, I’m the one who made the farm something,” Dawn said reluctantly. “But that doesn’t mean I’m brilliant.”
Elliott’s lips curved into a smile. “Oh, I beg to differ,” he said. “You’re brilliant, Dawn Abner. I only hope that someday you can see it for yourself.”
“All this because I gave you a pomegranate?” Dawn said half to herself.
“No, not at all,” Elliott said. “All this because it’s true.”
Dawn sighed. She knew that she was unnecessarily hard on herself, but that didn’t make taking a compliment any easier, especially if it came from a cute writer with the most gorgeous hair she’d ever seen. Still, she appreciated Elliott’s kindness, even if it was just because he pitied her.
“D’you mind if I stay a while?” she asked. “I could use a break from being out in the cold.”
Elliott smiled at her. “Please do,” he replied. “I’d love the company. And if you’re looking for reading material, I think there’s a collection of Ovid’s works somewhere around here.”
“Perfect,” Dawn said as she pulled herself up off of the floor. The library was still sparsely stocked, so she was able to find it quickly. She sat down beside Elliott and flipped through the book, looking for the start of whichever myth struck her fancy.
“Dawn?” he said softly.
She looked up, meeting his eyes. “Yeah?”
“I’m glad you ventured out here to see me.”
Dawn looked over at him and smiled. “So am I.”
#hush Bree#dawn abner#dawn x elliott#also my tag for Elliott is#manic pixie dream husband#not putting this in The Actual Tag bc idk how hard the fandom will jump down my throat#also I know technically it's the museum but it seems weird to be like 'the museum' when Dawn's bringing BOOKS#and then reading with Elliott#anyways I usually don't write shit this early in a fandom but it happened so whatever
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If I go by the metric of: post a link to a book on sale on Twitter-->wait and see how many clicks that sale gets-->usually zero, or maybe one or two, then Twitter does not actually get my name out there or increase sales or even raise awareness among the people who follow me that I have books out.
I don't have any other stat information from them. I probably get even fewer clicks from Tumblr, but Tumblr is a chaotic mess and was never really a factor in sales anyway as far as I know.
Twitter, however, is one of the few free avenues left for authors to talk with people or promote themselves or whatever. (There is Facebook also but I hate Facebook and I am not interesting enough to maintain a FB group with wacky hijinks or whatever happens over there. Also the culture of random authors inviting you to groups or just putting you into their groups??? Don't like that.)
But, since we've established that a) m/m romance and queer romance have some overlap but are very different and I am not really in m/m romance even when I try to be b) I am incapable of talking to people or making friends c) I am not the sort to do long Twitter threads about writing or the publishing industry because I know nothing, then Twitter seems like just a waste of my energy.
PLUS, while I enjoy seeing differing viewpoints and stuff on there, writing Twitter or romance Twitter or whatever just exacerbates my 'I don't belong here/I am not wanted here' constant internal spiraling. (So, btw, do most of the few m/m or queer romance review sites. Everybody seems to know everybody they care to know. That probably isn't (entirely) true but.... I have scars from several fandoms now as well as my early days with DSP, and the sense that I am the embarrassing weird white trash cousin to these people has never really gone away. I sometimes get authors messaging me... but anonymously or in private only. Like I am fine to read but not okay to be seen with??? I don't know what that is about either, but it doesn't help my issues. Also nearly every single one of them either writes for a living or has some white collar type day job and idk what to even say to them because their problems are not often my problems.)
hmm this is probably a case of real life invisible person issues/mental health issues regarding grief and the pandemic etc merging with book failure but.... that shit isn't for me. (I have related whining about how tired I am of having to do everything myself and figure out everything myself but, you know, I'll just let that build up toward my breakdown later.) Twitter's algorithm is about getting you to click stuff and engage, not your mental health. But even with that, I think some of this is just how book/romance/whatever Twitter operates. It has cliques and blind spots like anything else.
I do really like hearing and seeing stuff from different people about their experiences. But I also really cannot handle much else from Twitter, and Twitter itself does not give me anything in return for the stress. But deleting feels self-destructive considering it took me literal years to get even 300 followers there. If I deleted and then had to get a Twitter for promo again in the future, I'd have to do that all over again. :(
Also, I know there is High Romance and romance (much like High Fantasy and fantasy) and that romance tends to be light, frothy, easily consumed funtimes. But so many books seem to like to do "MC or LI has gone through an experience that would actually deeply affect them, but we are just going to do that on the surface and make it, like, sexy angst, not the real angst" and I think that is actually a big part of why so many of those books can be confusing or flat or irritating to me. Which is unfortunate, because I do want fun stuff to read. But those books are like watching shows on CBS--yeah sure it's fun, but then you're like, LET THE CHARACTERS TALK AND GROW. WAIT THIS PERSON WOULD BE DEALING WITH THEIR TRAUMA FROM THIS FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES, NOT JUST SAD FOR ONE EPISODE--and then, if you are me, you have to stop watching because the frustration gets to be too much.
(Sorry. There is A LOT going on in my head right now and I am trying to get some of it out or at least organized.)
#babbling#personal#whining#i would go back to just writing fanfic and being ignored by large fandoms if i had a fandom rn#at least in fanfic you get some feedback once in a while#i guess i will go edit since i am not doing anything else right now
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This is coming from a place of genuine confusion....but why does a sect of the fandom dislike Marisha so much?? Like, I haven't seen it for ANY of the other players. Is it a "wife/girlfriend of the DM" complex, because I've seen that before. Idk, I don't get it, and no amount of googling has made me understand lol.
yeahhhhhhh
okay, to preface, i absolutely disagree with all of the marisha hate, i think she's a great player and is really unfairly treated
but a couple reasons why this tends to be a thing:
1) just plain old regular misogyny, yeah. all the girls on cr get it to an extent, but it's stronger with marisha - the idea that dnd is inherently a man's game and therefore no woman could be good at it is pervasive even in this fandom, not outright, but in subtle things, like how people give the guys a lot more leeway to do dumb shit than the girls, and on dnd posts in the past i've seen comments like "this reads like how laura and marisha would describe dnd while their husbands facepalm in the background", which like... isn't really harmful on the surface, but i have a hard time imagining matt and especially travis ever facepalming at their wives genuine ideas? like if it's obviously meant to be something ridiculous and not taken seriously, sure, but otherwise, that subtle implication that they see travis as a better player than laura is just way off. (and matt has more dnd experience than marisha but like... she's still a very good player)
2) the keyleth instinct. so here's the thing about campaign one and the characters they chose to play - the majority of the cast played within their comfort zone. they branched out a lot for c2, and obviously they as people aren't identical to their vox machina counterparts, but they're not too far away either. liam's stated he irl would be a rogue, taliesin likes playing intelligent edgy teenage assholes bc he was one, laura is a bit more goofy than vex but she still thinks a lot the same, scanlan is very sam, travis is obviously a lot smarter than grog but he still fell very in line with the kind of character travis is comfortable playing and the things he wants to explore.
but marisha chose a character in campaign one who was completely the opposite of her natural self. marisha is confident and very take no shit and a natural leader, keyleth is awkward and shy and doubts herself and overthinks things and has really bad luck in basically everything she ever tries. and people watched campaign one and assumed all of those traits were just the way marisha was. if you aren't drawn to keyleth as a character, it's relatively easy to find ways to hate her (which again circles back to the misogyny a bit). they see keyleth constantly fuck up due to awkwardness and think "marisha doesn't know how to play the game". they see keyleth be a mess of a person socially and think "wow marisha's not a very good actor if she can't handle this", completely ignoring the fact that she is acting very well and it's proven by the fact that they think keyleth is marisha
(and while she still gets hate as either character, the keyleth hate was far worse than the beau hate)
3) people just, not getting what she's doing. i wasn't in the fandom for the early days of cr2, but i have friends who were, and they've said there were circles of the fandom where everything marisha did was in question, even people not believing beau was a lesbian when it's made obvious in episode one, because what if she's doing it on purpose as a scam? and like, to broaden that a bit, i think marisha's characters and their decisions get misread a lot. i personally happen to find both beau and keyleth very relatable, so i usually get where they're coming from (mostly, bowlgate i was more on caleb's side there, but i still don't think she deserves hate for it), but to people who don't, or just haven't put effort into trying to understand marisha's characters, then between keyleth's awkwardness and beau's abrasiveness i think the majority of what they pick up from marisha's characters is negative
which is a shame, because they're both really good, well thought out, interesting characters.
4) this is going into my own meta for a bit, but, something i've found about marisha's characters is they're quite down to earth and very easily the viewpoint character of the group, in a way? like obviously it's an ensemble cast, but like... let's take keyleth. campaign one starts and ends with her. the very first adventure is triggered by her leaving home for the first time, to start her aramente. she's led a sheltered life up to this point, she doesn't know the world she's walking into - so we learn about this fantasy world at the same time she does. she has the most linear and easy to follow development, her aramente spans most of the story, and once it's done things only get more centered on her. she's now a leader of her people, she's fulfilled her destiny, but that means she lives so long all her worst fears are coming true - that she'll have to spend the rest of her life alone. how did we learn this was her biggest fear? because she's been scared since the start of losing vax, but the reason she has him at all is she resolved to not let that fear control her. and then as the endgame comes in, she suddenly has to face that head on. vax has a week left to live. barely two days after, they run into sprigg - someone who lived so long after all his friends died that he's lost himself, forgotten them, become a hermit of a person who's just living because he's got nothing better to do - everything keyleth believes she will become, and fears so much. but he proves she can still choose to remember them, and choose to live in their absence, not just survive. keyleth is the one who seals away vecna, who's grown so much in her power since that little scared druid girl, she can banish a god. and our story ends with her, and her father, and a raven - she's moving on, she's living, she's thriving, but she'll never forget.
if i was gonna write out vox machina's story as a novel, there is no character who would better suit being the protagonist than her
it's a bit less strong with beau, but she's still one of the more relatable characters, she's a human, who had a rebellious teenage years because of shitty overbearing parents, she's not a magic user, she's from the country we start in (and doesn't have a dark dangerous mystical secret like caleb and veth), a lot of the big turning points in the story have had her take the lead, it's the relative mundanity that gives a contrast to and lifts up the others, while still being a highly interesting character in her own right. beau is a grounding force of the mighty nein.
i personally like those kinds of characters, but i've noticed in almost all fandoms with a main character and then a group of side characters, the main character is rarely anyone's fave, overlooked in favour more (subjectively) interesting side characters, but then because the story puts the focus on the main character, people get sick of them and start to hate them? and in this form of storytelling, there is no main character, but people sorta do that to those kinds of characters anyway. and in addition to all the other marisha stuff, that probably contributes
#but hey marisha's awesome and i love her and more people should appreciate her characters#crit role cast#marisha ray#cr1#cr2#keyleth#beauregard lionett#text#meta#cr thoughts#ask#critical role#annalise-inks
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Hi baby🥰🥰 please don't feel obligated to answer this or anything. But could you write some headcanons for Tendou & Sugawara? They could be platonic or not, nsfw or sfw, idrc. I just wanna see some Tendou x Suga headcanons 😌 oki bye I love you💖
Hi baby! Of course I’m gonna answer, don’t worry. Amidst all of this Thanksgiving bullshit, I’m already watching Haikyuu so I decided to whip up some of these HCs for you bc 1) you asked, duh, 2) I need to write for Haikyuu anyways, and 3) SUGAAAAAA BEBEIIIII imsorryiminlovewithHIMMMM-
Anways, so have some nipple sucking HCs because that’s what came to mind first- I love you so much and I hope this is what you wanted!
𝐍𝐈𝐏𝐏𝐋𝐄 𝐒𝐔𝐂𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆: 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐊𝐘𝐔𝐔 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒
-- 𝘍𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘚𝘶𝘨𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘢 𝘒ō𝘴𝘩𝘪 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘛𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘰𝘶 𝘚𝘢𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘪
GENRE: Smut
FANDOM: Haikyuu!
TRIGGER WARNINGS: SMUT! Just overstim, slight dacryphilia, nipple sucking- duh, and swearing!
SUMMARY: Just Reader-Chan (gender neutral) sucking on best boi nipples.
(Headers are mine, but the art inside of them are not! Please don’t steal or repost without credit!)
𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐀𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐀 𝐊𝐎𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈
He’s always enjoyed your guys’s encounters ever since the two of you first met.
You started off as a friend of the team of course, introduced to the other members by Hinata with his extroverted self.
Immediately, you took a liking to Sugawara; I mean y’all did go to the same school for awhile and were in the same class so it only made sense.
Everyone around you already knew you and him would make it out of high school.
You’d always hang out with each other, and when you two were alone, that’s when he asked you out.
Hell yeah! He cared for his team, so it only makes sense that he cared for you a little more because you were his S/O
It goes without saying that he was fairly traditional.
… And sensitive.
So when you asked him- directly- if you could suck on his nipples, he instantly turned red and fell silent.
At first, you thought you struck a nerve and hurt him in some way because his eyes started to glisten more.
“I-It was just a suggestion- we don’t have to do it.”
He looked even more red, this being one of the only times he’d let you dom him.
“Get on top.”
No other direction had to be said, and he quickly- and easily- forced you into his lap.
You couldn’t help but to notice- already- how hard he was under you.
I guess he really is an imaginative character, huh?
He closed his eyes and looked away, his nipples already hard and peeking at you from under his shirt.
The both of you were in college, but it was apparent that something like this had never happened to him before.
You couldn’t help but to run your hands under his shirt first, feeling around his toned chest.
Just to fish for his reactions, you palmed his hardened nipples and smirked as you waited.
It was a short wait; instantly, his back arched and his body pushed into yours as he clenched his eyes shut.
You thought you’d hurt him until he leaned into you and let out one of his breathy moans that you loved so much.
“Harder,” he panted at you as he whined, wrapping one of his dainty hands around your wrist, forcing you to press into his pec more.
He looked like he was about to cry already as he got more antsy.
He knew that his body was sensitive and he’d easily cum from just you teasing his nipple with your hand.
“Someone’s a little needy tonight, hm?” You couldn’t help but to smirk down at him.
He couldn’t do anything but nod and clumsily move to try and pull up his shirt, panting like a dog without water after a run.
You laughed and ducked your head under his shirt that was halfway lifted and instantly locked your lips around his puckering nipple.
He was excited, maybe a little TOO excited.
Instantly, he threw his head back and let out a loud moan before slapping a hand over his mouth as to not alert the others that also live in the college dorms.
You pressed your tongue against it, pushed and teased and felt his cock throb in his pants as he started to tremble under you.
From how he was breathing, he sounded like he was about to pass out.
You had to pull away and remind him to calm down.
“Slow down your breathing, babe. You’ll pass out,” you cooed at him softly.
“I-I’m sorry, Sugar,” he whimpered quietly as he bucked his hips into you. “I-It just f-feels too good! I ca-can’t-“
Without letting him finish, you nipped at his swollen nipple gently with your teeth.
As if he wasn’t already pushed over the edge, he jolted and practically stopped breathing, his toes curled as he let go of you, burying his hands into the bed beside him.
“S-Sugar! S-Su- S-Suga-“ he whined out as his tears rolled down his face, his eyes rolled into the back of his head as he trembled and melted under you.
You took in every single one of his moans and cries, his chest heaving as he became more overwhelmed.
You didn’t want to stop until he begged you to, so you bit his nipple again as you sucked hard.
Even though his shirt was over your head, he still managed to tug your hair at least a little, his free hand holding your hips down as he humped into you.
“I-I’m gonna c-cum S-Sugar,” he whimpered in between his uncontrollable, breathy, whiny moans.
You, of course were ready. You knew his day had been stressful and he’d been completely overwhelmed by you just teasing his nipples whether with your mouth or your hand.
So in response, all you did was suck harder hearing every peak of his moans and cries as he trembled and bucked his hips harder, orgasming as his toes curled, his nails practically ripped the sheets on his bed, his eyes still streaming tears as they rolled back into his head and he made no noise, not even breathing.
You had to pull away, fearing that he was already overtimed and you gently slapped his face.
He was trembling, and finally he took a deep breath, opening his pretty eyes to look up at you.
“I-I’m sorry Sugar,” he whispered softly as he nuzzled into your hand a little more. “I-It just f-felt too good,” he whispered as he closed his eyes, practically purring under your soft touch.
“There’s no need to apologize baby boy,” you cooed out quietly to him, gently swiping tendrils of ash grey hair from in front of his face. “Just relax and I’ll go order us some dinner. You have early practice tomorrow.”
𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐔 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐈
Of course it was the typical story of a forbidden rival school love.
not.
All in all, most of the schools respected Shiratorizawa back when you were in high school.
And to see him lingering around Kurasuno both made everyone’s morale leap at least 50% but also made them question wtf dude was doing there all the time.
He often helped the team practice and gave them pointers on how to get better, and also got you more involved too.
He’s always teasing, cracking jokes etc.
Sometimes it pissed you off; your name in his phone was “Itty Bitty Panda-Chan”
It didn’t help that you loved it and every time he called you his Itty Bitty Panda-Chan, it made you flustered.
Like usual, he played on it. All of the time.
Even alone.
You were hanging out with him at his house because he lived away from the college dorms and the two of you had finished with your work and had things for your next class situated for the next day, so you were playing games and he was… Well… Staring at you like usual.
“Is there a reason you’re staring at me, Idiot-San,” you mocked him constantly.
“Well… I have something in mind, Pan-Chan,” he dubbed you for short. You were interested but said absolutely nothing.
“Oh little Pan- Chaaaaan,” he teased as he climbed on top of you while you were still rested on your stomach.
He really didn’t have to do much to tease you or make you flustered since teasing was only natural for him.
Your body tensed up because of course your boyfriend was up to something. He always was.
“Answer me when I’m talking to you, my cute little Pan-Chan,” he whispered in your ear causing you to squeak.
“W-What d-did you have I-in mind, Satori,” you murmur as the next match of your game begins.
“Wow! I’m so happy you asked,” he teased as he forced you on your back and he laughed softly.
You’re just looking up at him like “I can’t pause it. It’s online.” And of course he doesn’t care.
Disrespectful bitch.
“How about…. Mmmm…. You give me the controller. I wanna play.”
That grin on his face when he was up to something said it all and you forked the controller over.
“What do you want, Ten?”
He looked like a little kid, slinging his feet over the bed with a laugh. “Chu chuuu~ This game is so… Cute,” he trailed off, seemingly sucked into the game in front of him.
That was, until you felt his strong hand on your hip, pulling you into his lap.
“T-Ten-“
“Shh,” he whispered as he lifted his hoodie, playing the game momentarily with one hand. “Suck… I want you to suck on them,” he whispered as he ‘dodged’ to one side, acting like he was the character in the game.
‘What is it with him tonight,’ you thought to yourself, just staring at his muscular chest.
You felt his gaze on you and you looked up with a soft gasp.
His cat-like eyes immediately locked with yours as he respawned in game. “I didn’t ask, Panda- Chan,” he said quietly, sternly, clearly. Honestly it kinda scared you.
“U-Um… O-Okay,” you thought you could handle him, but when he got like this, you couldn’t really. You liked how he had control over you no matter what.
As soon as your tongue pressed against one of his nipples you felt a flutter in his chest. And yours. His breathing got quicker and his eyes fluttered, but he still continued with that stupid demeaning tone of his.
“Chu chuuu~” He practically squealed. “That’s… N-Not g-good enough, Pan-Pan-Chan,” he gasped out softly as he leaned back.
Obviously, it was a lie. You could tell by how his legs jolted a little or his breathing quickened. He was loving every second of your teasing.
“C-Cut the shit, Satori,” you whispered softly, your hand timidly resting on his hip, the other one running over his abs.
“Mouthy, hm?” He looked down at you with that piercing gaze again. “Use all that spunk and suck harder,” he growled as he focused back in on the game, bucking his chest at you.
You did as instructed, savoring his sweet and salty taste, humming as you did so, your other hand palming at his sensitive chest as you stared up at him.
He threw his head back and let out a soft groan as he felt you get amped up and he laughed softly as he continued to play the game.
“Fuck yeah,” he whispered out softly as he grinded into you, not caring too much about the game at this point.
You were too far into it by now to just stop, and you loved every reaction you could get, and you let yourself go, accidentally biting his nipple, causing him to drop the controller, his eyes crossing a little as he tilted his head back.
You let out a little hollow laugh of your own and continued nibbling and kissing on his nipple feeling him practically melt beneath you. You held the power and you loved it.
Also hearing his moans and praises was definitely a huge boost for you to keep going.
You grinded your hips down into his bulge and moaned softly feeling how well he fit in between your legs.
It was apparent that this wasn’t enough to get him to cum, but close.
He tangled his fingers with your hair as he edged closer and closer to cumming, pulling you closer as he let out a strangled groan.
Obviously, this is gonna escalate into a lot more.
#Black Velvet x Community#Jae's Pebble#bb kit#Jenesis Asks/Answers#black velvet asks#black velvet x haikyuu#haikyuu!!#haikyu x reader#sugawara hcs#sugawara smut#sugawara x you#sugawara kōshi#suga#sugawara x y/n#sugawara fic#sugawara imagine#tendou headcanon#tendou x reader#satori tendo x reader#tendou satori#satori x reader#tendou x you#hq headcanons#hq smut#hq tendou#hq suga x reader#hq sugawara
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I plan to read Desiderata but I don't know a thing about Rammstein. What should I know before diving in?
That depends very heavily on what about Rammstein would interest you.
I’ll be honest, anon, Desiderata is not the best story to start with if you’re completely new to R+. The story assumes a familiarity with the band’s history, as well as 1980s East German politics, and depicts both with terms and viewpoints familiar at the time. It’s not very accessible if you want to read a story about Rammstein, I’m afraid, it is very much a period piece.
That said, I can talk a little about what made me write Desiderata; if you’re interested in any of those topics, you’re probably good to go. I will also add some pointers as to how to begin a journey into Rammstein in general. This will be a very long post beneath the cut.
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1) I’m interested in life during the GDR. I’m especially interested in how ordinary East Germans lived, down to what they ate, the kinds of people they’d meet, where they could travel to for the holidays. What people take for everyday occurrences are anything but outside of their homes. Most of Desiderata takes place in the pre- and early-Rammstein era (1985-1995), when the band members didn’t know they were going to get so big, nor what would happen after the reunification of Germany. I wanted to depict their era realistically. Desiderata is a written painting of that time.
2) I wanted to write on the anti-authoritarian character. To distill a long and complex history down, Rammstein has their origins in Ostpunk, and many of its band members spent their early life resisting the government in one way or another. They didn’t all do this in the same way, nor always with the conscious desire to stick it to the government. Sometimes they paid for it anyway. In Richard’s case, with terrible consequences, as his arrest and detainment by the Stasi finally made him flee the country. Desiderata is written in Richard’s POV and includes a sequence on what might have occurred during this time, as well as an analysis of his general psyche on the years leading up to that arrest. Desiderata’s account relies heavily on actual interviews Richard has done, as well as published Rammstein material, so if you’re interested in a character study of this sort you might like it.
3) I did not want to depict the above through the patronizing lens commonly found in Western media. It’s easy to fall into the trap of binary opposites when you’re writing about stuff like this: Richard was oppressed by the GDR so he must hate everything about the GDR, and/or furthermore, the GDR must have been evil. It’s the other way around if you’re approaching this from an anti-capitalist lens: if the East Germans had known the ‘freedom’ which lay beyond the wall was actually mid-stage capitalism, and if they’d known how badly that shit would break down in a couple of decades, they wouldn’t have wanted it.
Now I do not know what the objectively correct political position is here. But when you’re writing a character study of Richard, it shouldn’t be either of those. It’s definitely not how Rammstein looks at their past, judging by the interviews they’ve given and the books they’ve published; not even Richard has such a black-and-white approach to the life he led. It’s easy to forget that when you’re writing a fic, or even an article which tries to lean on the ‘facts’; one’s subconscious biases inform how they process facts, and I want to do better than that. I’ve fallen into that morality trap before because I didn’t know any better, and as a result I wrote some really bad stories, and I am ashamed of that. Rammstein have led a rich and complicated life with ups and downs. Many of them sincerely loved the GDR, the ones who didn’t still saw plenty of self-admitted good in it. If you would like to bask in my efforts at honesty, as fragmented as it is (for in the end, I am not from the GDR), Desiderata is the best I’ve done to this date.
4) Some good old Tillchard. Yes, I admit it, Desiderata is also a pairing exercise. ‘Tillchard’ is the shorthand for the pairing between Till (vocal) and Richard (lead guitarist); they are longtime friends in real life, and they share a trust between them seldom paralleled by anyone else in the band, imo. They’ve lived together for a time, they raised their daughters together, they began their foray into music in general while being aware of each other. They have duets together for God’s sake. I’ve been digging Tillchard for ten years so I need to stop before this becomes a longer essay than it should be, but long story short, if this becomes the first pairing you’re interested in I’d recommend adding Desiderata to the fanfic pile.
Ultimately, all the above points would still work out for the best if you knew more about Rammstein. Now for the practical recommendations. See if you like their music first: currently they have seven albums out, the most recent of which is Rammstein (2019). I don’t know how hard you like your music, but in order of most hardness to least my rank goes:
Liebe ist für alle da / Reise, Reise
Rammstein (2019)
Sehnsucht
Mutter
Herzeleid
Rosenrot
My personal ranking is:
Mutter
Liebe ist für alle da / Rammstein (2019)
Sehnsucht
Reise, Reise
Herzeleid
Rosenrot
Their best tracks usually have music videos attached to them. Check them out too. R+ take serious care with their music video narratives, they’re often their own little story in themselves. Their live performances are worth watching, even in video. If you can read German, I would also recommend checking out Rammstein literature, of which there are plenty. Till has three volumes of poetry out (Messer, In Stillen Nachten, 100 Gedichte); Flake has two autobiographies (Der Tastenficker and Heute hat die Welt Geburtstag, the latter of which is available in English); Mix Mir Einen Drink is the biography of Feeling B, which many members of Rammstein played in before Rammstein, and is an invaluable source for GDR life.
Out of everything I’ve listed, as of Feb 2021, Flake’s autobiography is hands-down the best place to begin your Rammstein journey. There will be a more extensive book about Rammstein by Olaf Heine soon, but it won’t be released until later this year.
There is no end goal to how much you should be interested in Rammstein, or what about the band you ought to like. At any point in this journey, try out a fic or two, see what you like. The fandom has written about basically every music video, every notable event that happened to the band (some may include sources!), and just about every combination of pairings possible among the six. You are in very well-covered territory, I promise :D
Feel free to ask more questions if need be. There is so much you can write about this band, I’ve definitely not covered everything. If at any point in this process you read Desiderata, and you end up enjoying it, that’s all I could ask for.
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Honestly people (women) who say gay guys always switch are wrong like most gay guys have a preference from what I've seen. On grindr too they tend to say what they want so they don't "waste time". And from what I've seen, gay guys tend to prefer for example NS over SN, and they usually explain the reason being that Naruto is very dominating. I think I'll trust gay men over women who are attracted to Sasuke with this
yeah I don’t trust women especially teenagers who never had sex or even felt attraction for anyone and whose only experience is social media where they define themselves as ace spectrum cause it’s kinda early but they want to fit in a cool box. not saying that ace ppl don’t exist ofc. but I don’t believe 90% of those online like I don’t believe to online ppl using labels of whatever kind cause who the fuck knows them anyway so why should I trust the crap they say. Back to this yeah, fangirls are not the law and they’re stupid usually. they justify their (wrong OOC) preference with ‘ewww you NS fans are fetishizing gays and you’re a bad person bc they switch’ which is interesting bc it comes from SN fans most of the times. it’s like while NS fans are validated by canon so it comes off as the most natural and IC dynamic, SN stans have to use weird ass-pulled arguments like wrong canon interpretation or this one. f*ck them tbh.
also yeah I know a gay guy who mentioned preference and I saw that grindr preference thing and I wish ppl understood that preferences exists for everyone, including gay guys.
(not to mention that character dynamics express who’s dominant and who’s passive ourside sex too?? which happens in heterosexual couples too, even irl, when there are dominant girls and passive guys, or with wlw couples??)
I recently saw the stupidest discourse on another fandom (the old guard), with first world fake woke puritans attacking those who had preferences over the muslim guy topping in the canon pairing, so they were all like ‘if you like this guy as top you’re fetishizing gays and muslims’ so wow they hit jackpot with it huh? and idiots with no functioning brain getting scared bc they liked that dynamic so the same shitty fandom police crap in a different context. then some guy arrives and writes that he’s gay and muslim and he likes to top so their discourse is stupid and some ppl were like enlightened by this guy and others still not convinced bc they know better, and I don’t even care about that fandom but the concept is that fans these days are so dumb it’s impossible to deal with them.
Because this whole thing can be looked from a higher perspective, which is why tf can’t ppl enjoy what they like without shitting on what others’ enjoy? And, in case of ppl enjoying OOC bullshit, why can’t they admit they just like that dynamic without having to make it right when it obviously isn’t? Like martyr meek itachi fans justifying SI. I hate this fandom and all fandoms tbh
#anti-sasunaru#anti-topSasuke#Anonymous#my ex and I are both passive so no one took initiative after a while and things got shitty...I know what couple dynamics are so fuck ppl#fanon and fandom stuff
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