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collecting-stories · 3 years

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Jellyfish - JJ Maybank

Request: Hey! I was wondering or you could do an outer banks imagine where like in season one the pogues leave kie, Sarah and reader on a boat, and the reader is the one getting stung by a jellyfish. The night goes on and she starts having an allergic reaction the jellyfish sting and her breathing starts to go bad and all dizzy. The girls have to call a mayday. And the sherif/ambulance boat? Comes and gets her or the pogues come back the next morning and she is not well at all. Then hospital. The pogues feel really badx Maybe reader x jj? 

A/N: I just started a rewatch of s1 tonight so I can finally watch s2...also I googled allergic reactions to a jellyfish sting for this.

Outer Banks Masterlist

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Sarah stood beside you, practically holding you up, as you emptied the contents of your stomach into the marsh for the fifth time in so many minutes. The boys plan to strand Sarah and Kiara on the boat hadn’t been a very clever one and when you had protested JJ had jokingly pushed you over the edge of the HMS, claiming that now you too were stranded with them. 

It wasn’t exactly how you’d planned to spend your night, especially with everyone on each other’s nerves as severely as they were, you’d been looking forward to taking advantage of that and spending the night back at your house with JJ. Instead, you were stranded on Heyward’s boat with Kiara and Sarah bitching at each other. Not to mention the angry red mark blossoming over your stomach from the jellyfish that had stung you as you’d tread water earlier.

“I thought you said you could fix this stupid piece of shit!” Sarah shouted to Kiara as she rubbed her hand along your back. The juxaposition of her kindness to you and her edgyness with Kiara wasn’t lost on you...even as you felt your head swimming.

“I gotta lay down,” you urged, hands gripping the edge of the boat as you rested your chin against the cool side, staring into the murky water. It was starting to get darker outside but you weren’t paying attention to that anymore. You felt like you were going to throw up again though this time it felt prompted by the dizzy feeling when you moved your head and not the pain shooting through your abdomen.

“Okay, let’s lay down...do you want a blanket or something?” Sarah asked, eyes darting around the boat to check for any spare blankets or sweatshirts.

You shook your head, immediately regretting the action as your vision blurred. “No...no, it’s so hot.” When you struggled to get JJ’s shirt over your head without moving too much, Sarah grabbed the hem of the shirt and eased it up.

“She doesn’t need your help!” Kiara yelled from the hatch, looking out at you with concern. You’d been fine earlier, before you’d boarded the boat with them, before the jellyfish stung you, but now you were doing worse and worse. She was trying to fix the boat but it was obvious that JJ and John B’s genius plan had included purposely sabotaging any chance they had of getting the boat back to shore.

“Obviously, she does!” Sarah shouted back, “she’s puking over the side of the fucking boat! What was in that shit you rolled anyway?”

Kiara looked incredulous at the suggestion that it was the weed they’d smoked that made you like this, “oh cause I poisoned my best friend with weed? Is that it?”

“Maybe!” Sarah shrugged, “how should I know.”

“Not helping,” you groaned, rolling to the side and pressing your hand against your stomach. “Kie...my stomach is killing me.”

“What can I do?” She asked, coming back over to you and Sarah.

“Call for the coast guard or something?” Sarah suggested, looking out over the marsh as if someone would just happen to be driving through. It was pitch black now, the night falling completely. It wasn’t too late yet, close to 9:30p Sarah supposed, but she wasn’t confident that this could last until morning. Who knew when the boys would come back?

“With what phone Sarah? The tower is down.”

“Swim to shore or something then!” She snapped.

“Sure, no problem...why didn’t I think of that? I’ll jump in the fucking marsh in the pitch black and swim toward what I think might be land!” Kiara shouted.

“Guys,” you snapped, pulling yourself up to the edge of the ship again. You felt like you were going to throw up again but there wasn’t anything left in your stomach, “shut the fuck up! You aren’t helping...I know they messed with the boat, is the radio working?”

“Let me check.” Kiara stood up from your side and headed back to the controls, checking the radio. “I’ve got a signal!”

You weren’t sure how long it took between Kiara signaling a mayday and the police boat actually coming out on the marsh because you passed out soon after she’d gotten the signal, slumped against Sarah, the pain in your side and abdomen too much for you to bear. Neither of the girls wanted to leave you overnight in the hospital, worried something would happen the second they left your side, so Kiara scribbled a note and left it taped to the window of the boat.

Gone to the hospital – was all it said. Not very descriptive but extremely alarming, the boys had arrived at the emergency room frantic.

“What the fuck kind of scare tactic was that Kie!” JJ had shouted down the hallway when he saw his friend outside one of the rooms. A nurse down the same hall shushed him as he passed her and he turned around to flip her off.

“Excuse me but you three deserve it after the shit you pulled! Leaving us stranded out there with no communication? You’re lucky the radio worked.” Sarah hissed, shoving JJ when he tried to get passed her into the room.

The second he’d seen her it had been clear the person who was missing, the one who was undoubtedly in the hospital bed in the room he was standing outside of. You’d gotten hurt, seriously if you were here, if they’d had to mayday a police boat.

“What happened?” Pope asked, quieter than his best friend had been able to muster.

“She’s allergic to jellyfish.” Sarah replied, turning a glare on JJ, “when this moron pushed her in the water she got stung and had a reaction.”

“Is she okay?”

“She’ll be alright...she’s dehydrated though, so she’s on fluids for the rest of the – JJ!” Kiara snapped when he pushed passed her to get into the room. He moved the curtain aside to see you there, still a little out of it from the exhaustion of the night before but you smiled when you saw him.

“Hey,” he dropped his voice down to a whisper, a contrast to the sharp scrap of the chair that he dragged to your bedside, “I’m so sorry.”

“Guess I’m allergic to something after all.” You managed to tease, recalling the conversation you’d had a few weeks earlier when JJ had begrudgingly given up the peanut butter and jelly sandwich he was trying to make at John B’s when you reminded him that he was highly allergic to peanuts.

He’d claimed that “maybe it went away”, a possibility you both knew to be impossible while you told him that you weren’t stabbing him with an epi-pen if he had an allergic reaction. “I would stab you, if you were allergic to anything,” JJ had replied, settling for jelly on toast instead.

“That doesn’t make me feel better.” JJ said now, eyeing the bag of fluids that was connected to you via IV. “I would’ve been fine thinking you didn’t have any allergies.”

“It’s not your fault JJ, it was an accident...I could’ve been stung a million times before this, we literally live on the coast.” You tried to laugh and coughed; throat still sore. JJ grabbed for the pitcher of water at your bedside and poured you a glass, leaning over to help you swallow.

“Yeah but you didn't get stung a million times before this...you got stung after I pushed you in!”

“We should let you get some rest,” Pope’s voice sounded over JJ’s shoulder and you both looked over to where he was standing at the curtain. He smiled at you, a silent ‘glad you’re okay’ and ‘sorry’ rolled into one.

You nodded, more than aware that you were on the verge of falling asleep again. Still, you reached for your boyfriend’s hand, settling for his wrist instead as he was still holding the plastic cup. “Will you stay?” you asked, eyes meeting JJ’s.

“Yeah, of course.” He promised, sitting back down, “I’m not going anywhere.” He didn’t mention the absolute panic that had racked through him when he saw Kiara’s note or realized you were the one that was injured and he definitely didn’t tell you how severely he blamed himself for you getting stung in the first place, instead he just sat there holding your hand and promising that he would stay there with you until you were discharged. “Everything’s okay, you’re okay.”

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riverdale-retread · 3 years

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RVD S.1 E.1

Every kind of spoiler warning.

I am rewatching RVD from S1 Ep 1 after going through the entire series in one long binge because I feel like I must’ve hallucinated some of the stuff I remember happening and I really liked Season 5, where everyone’s life has gone kind of wrong, and I want to see them as Sophomores again.

- Is Riverdale actually a small town? There’s a forest with a big river, but this small town is big enough to have a ‘wrong side’ of the tracks, and there’s some place in ‘town’ that has dark alleyways in which crimes happen, and a sort of inner city space (like, where MadDog lives and where Jughead later raids with his gang). And later in this episode, the halls of Riverdale High look extremely crowded.

- Alice Cooper wishing that a dead 16 year old boy (who impregnated her daughter) would burn in hell as the town is watching the police trawl the river for his corpse is really quite vicious.

- Betty is in a bra when Kevin is hanging out with her in her bedroom. Does this mean Kevin has seen Betty naked? Is this normal in best gay friendships for these Gen Z people? Was it ever? He also tells Betty to take “The Ginger Bull by the horns tonight!” which gets funnier each time I think about it.

- There’s an astonishingly beautiful young extra sitting behind Archie when he and his rapist teacher are exchanging infatuated looks at the assembly. Show business is so weird and unfair.

Veronica is popping out to me in this reviewing of the entire series (I’ve gotten to S. 5 Ep 10 and am going back to the beginning).

- I love Veronica’s introduction. Now that I know how Veronica will behave over the course of the next five seasons, I love her in this fresh-from-New York state, with the pearls. I also love how she wears that cape to go pick up burgers, reminds me a bit of Lynn Bracken’s introduction in L.A Confidential, at the liquor shop.

- Veronica gets a slo-mo entry, justified in context, when she first enters Pop’s! I had started to think only Cheryl got these. And Cheryl’s slo-mo glamour shots are just in her head usually.

- Why are black haired people the morally ambiguous ones in this world? Veronica, the Lodges, Jughead, all the black haired and dark-brunette Serpents, Reggie v. 1 and v.2 ...

- Veronica talks only in references and I feel like Jughead would be the only one to understand them (”I am Breakfast at Tiffany’s but this place is strictly In Cold Blood”). Jughead and Veronica are superficial and pretentious in the same way and I love them both for it. Oh, and Breakfast at Tiffany’s, the book? Veronica hasn’t read it - the reference she’s making is to the Audrey Hepburn movie, which is the highly sanitized version of that book. So what she means is, I am Peak Audrey Hepburn and this town like the true crime book. Archie has no idea what she’s just said, and Betty knows it, and he laughs anyway.

- I was the new girl in school every 2 years K-12 and I am so in love with Veronica’s determination to make something better happen in this new school. I love the puppy way she latches on to Betty.

Jughead

- S1 Ep 1 is really very much Archie’s show. I’m shocked at how little screentime Jughead actually gets. He gets to be such a huge presence in the later episodes and seasons, and becomes a stealth-protagonist who gets his own unacknowledged spinoff inside the show. They will keep sending Jughead to places where Archie can’t go and is unknown, because when Archie is present Jughead can’t be the protagonist. But this stealing of ground from Archie must’ve been an organic development as the show kept looking for more material to expand on as the seasons went on, because this is not the set up in this initial episode.

- Jughead totally acts like a sour ex boyfriend in his first on-screen conversation with Archie, including being supremely irritated that Archie is not looking for him when they end up meeting in the diner. Plus Archie is pretty brutal when he calls Betty his ‘best friend’ when it’s clear that Archie is Jughead’s ‘only friend.’ And Jughead is so used to this too.

- I’d gotten to thinking Jughead was feline-faced but he’s not. He’s more rodent-faced. And compared to Archie’’s clean cut sharp-jawline face, much more feminine.

- On rewatch I thought Jughead was too smirky and vibrated with ‘unsettled’ energy that clashed badly with Archie’s more naturalistic acting.

#riverdale #rvd #betty cooper #jughead jones #too many thoughts about a tv show #because the COVID pandemic is not ending #veronica lodge #spoilers #riverdale recap #riverdale episode recap

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hayleysstark · 5 years

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GIVE US THE INTENSE ANALYSIS ON MERLIN AND KILGHARRAH YEEEES

may i just say, i am very glad you asked but i really don’t think you’re going to be, by the end of this. do you know how many Thoughts™️ i have had about one very stupid warlock and one very cryptic dragon???? do you????? do you know????? i could turn this into a fucking,,,,,, PowerPoint presentation if i cared to except i don’t and also i would never inflict PowerPoint on my followers, i love you guys far too much for that, i’m sorry for even suggesting it honestly

i AM sorry in advance for how long this is going to be, though, i’ll try to just reference key points, such as,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

The Dragon’s Call

I legitimately don’t even know where to start with this, to tell you the truth - there is just so much to talk about here, and I’m honestly a bit overwhelmed - but I think, most of all, it’s incredibly important to note how easily, how effortlessly, Kilgharrah handles Merlin here.

We don’t know yet how much Kilgharrah truly knows about Merlin as a person - all he ever mentions, in this interaction at least, is the destiny Merlin shares with Arthur - but Merlin gives himself away all too easily. There is such earnest desperation and hope on his face when Kilgharrah talks of fate. He lays bare the thing he wants more than anything else in the world–a purpose for himself and his power–and Kilgharrah immediately seizes this advantage. He dangles a “great destiny” in front of Merlin like a horse with a carrot, but he neglects the details and the specifics in favor of the big picture.

The only true instruction Merlin receives from Kilgharrah in this scene is “protect Arthur”. There’s some stuff about Albion, and freedom for sorcerers, of course, but Kilgharrah leaves it all a bit fuzzy, a bit scrambled. Clearly, he has plenty more to say on the subject, but he deliberately holds back. Like he’s going to clear it all up, yes, of course, but not tonight, no, maybe next time he sees Merlin.

And that’s exactly what he wants.

I know Kilgharrah’s cryptic, confusing, usually not-very-helpful advice is sort of treated a bit like a running joke, by the fandom and the series itself, but just think, for even a second, about the implications of it.

Kilgharrah does not intend to tell Merlin everything he needs to know to fulfill the prophecy. Kilgharrah does not intend to tell Merlin even a fraction of everything he needs to know. Kilgharrah wants to keep Merlin coming back for more. Kilgharrah needs Merlin. Kilgharrah needs to earn Merlin’s trust. Kilgharrah needs to establish a relationship with Merlin if he’s ever going to get free of his prison.

At this point in time, Kilgharrah does not care about Merlin. Kilgharrah does not care, even, about destiny, or Albion. Merlin is merely a means to an end, and so Kilgharrah treats him as such - gives him the bare minimum, gives him the slightest taste of what he wants, and pretends he’s doing Merlin an enormous favor the whole way through.

Perhaps Kilgharrah expects Merlin to jump at this chance - after all, great destinies bring much glory - but that’s absolutely not the case, and, as Merlin gets blunter and blunter about his doubts and reluctance, Kilgharrah takes away all other options.

Kilgharrah tells Merlin that the prophecy is not something he can cast off or leave behind. It’s not something he can outrun. As a matter of fact, their very next interaction in Valiant has a similar exchange.

Kilgharrah cuts off Merlin’s escape routes. Kilgharrah wants to trap Merlin. Kilgharrah wants Merlin to feel trapped, fettered, bound to something he doesn’t even want. Kilgharrah does not want Merlin to have a choice, so Kilgharrah denies him this choice right from the start. Kilgharrah teaches Merlin that he does not get to say no.

And it only gets worse as S1 drags on. Nearly all of their earliest interactions follow the same pattern, every single time: Kilgharrah never gives Merlin the whole truth, and Kilgharrah never forgets to make Merlin feel special.

And it works. It absolutely horrified me to sit through S1 at certain points - the pattern of malicious manipulation stood out to me so starkly, I couldn’t think how other people could even stomach it, to be honest. And even worse, you have to watch the hero wander right into the lions’ den, lay docilely down, and wait for the inevitable, because that manipulation fucking worked.

By as early as The Mark of Nimeuh, Merlin is clearly very at ease with Kilgharrah, visibly relaxed and even content in the caves with him. And it’s a horrific thing to see. If you recognize the pattern, if you recognize the way Kilgharrah draws Merlin in, it truly is a horrific thing to see.

And it only gets worse.

By The Beginning of the End, Merlin has started to take his destiny seriously–so seriously, he calls Arthur’s death “unthinkable”, so seriously that Kilgharrah advises him to kill a child, and Merlin actually takes the time to step back and consider it. This is where the true scope of Kilgharrah’s manipulation can best be seen, especially by the viewers who didn’t notice it, or just didn’t actively look for it in or after The Dragon’s Call.

As in The Dragon’s Call and Valiant, Kilgharrah cuts off Merlin’s escape routes. Kilgharrah traps Merlin. But it’s not like The Dragon’s Call, and it’s not like Valiant, not really, because this time, Kilgharrah is nowhere near as straightforward about it. He does not outright tell Merlin “you have no choice”–as a matter of fact, he is very quick to emphasize how much of a choice Merlin truly has.

And how, if Merlin dares to make the wrong one, it’s going to be all his fault.

Again, this is where the full extent of Kilgharrah’s machinations fully comes to light. For all but Merlin.

Because Merlin continues to trust Kilgharrah right up until

Le Morte d’Arthur

The term “emotional rollercoaster” is, in all honesty, a very weak way to describe this episode, but it’s the best I’ve got, so that’ll have to do. So, to make sure I don’t just fuck off right here, rewatch this one, and cry literal buckets, the way I’d really like to, I’ll just jump right on in. (I already have this whole episode memorized by heart anyway.)

If the casual way Kilgharrah sent Merlin off on an actual suicide mission - in absolutely every sense of the term - wasn’t enough to tip Merlin off that the cryptic lizard under the castle couldn’t be trusted, well, don’t worry, because the rest of the episode certainly does that.

This is the moment when Merlin finally starts to see through Kilgharrah’s pretty words, this is the moment when Merlin finally starts to see the web Kilgharrah has woven all around him, and it is done absolutely brilliantly.

Kilgharrah has grown so confident–so complacent, even–in his control over Merlin, he makes no attempt, at any point, to mask his true intentions.

And Merlin never wondered, not even once, if Kilgharrah might have an ulterior motive, a deeper reason, to see Arthur succeed, to see the prophecy come to fruition. Merlin never suspected Kilgharrah of treachery or deceit.

At first glance, this line is flat, unimaginative, unoriginal - you see it in every stereotypical fantasy series when the hero suffers a betrayal - but if you go back through S1 and you really pay attention to what’s led up to this, and damn, that line cuts deep. Because it’s true. It’s the truth. Merlin really believed Kilgharrah wanted the best for him.

Merlin really believed Kilgharrah was his friend.

Because Kilgharrah played him like a goddamned fiddle.

And even now, Kilgharrah thinks he can pull Merlin right back under his thumb, he truly thinks he’s still got a hold on Merlin, however small.

When Kilgharrah sees he’s lost the emotional advantage he had over Merlin, he immediately finds another angle to work with - the magical connections he and Merlin share. And it backfires spectacularly.

This is the first moment we see Kilgharrah truly fail. And this is the first moment we see Kilgharrah lose all control, and lash out in wild fury.

This was not a calculated move. This was not part of the plan. This was not the way Kilgharrah wanted things to go from here. This is raw, uncontrolled, unrestrained rage. This does not fit into the grand scheme Kilgharrah has cooked up over all those years in the dark, this is something far more primal than that. This is an emotional reaction in the deepest sense of the term, and it’s Merlin who dragged such an extreme response out of him.

But unlike in previous episodes, Merlin doesn’t come back and resolve it all. Things stay sour between them for–well, several weeks, actually, that’s my best guess, because we see in The Curse of Cornelius Sigan, Merlin’s outright refusal, at first, to return to Kilgharrah.

Gaius eventually convinces Merlin to mend fences with the dragon - Camelot will fall if he doesn’t, which certainly gives Merlin an incentive - but Kilgharrah’s help comes at a steep price now.

It’s clear Kilgharrah has realized he doesn’t need to play Merlin anymore. He doesn’t need to hide what he really wants, and he certainly doesn’t need to do anything special to keep Merlin coming back to him. Merlin needs him. Merlin will come back so long as he still has a prince to protect. So Kilgharrah, with this newfound sort of freedom, goes to the opposite extreme. He tears Merlin down for the smallest thing, he criticizes Merlin for every last little failure, he sneers at Merlin’s resolute hold to his own morality, he blames and belittles Merlin, he is needlessly and openly cruel to Merlin at absolutely every opportunity.

In The Nightmare Begins, we see he refuses to help Merlin with Morgana, he insists Morgana is not to be trusted and he calls Merlin a fool for his attempts to help her with her magic.

And, in The Witch’s Quickening, Kilgharrah reproaches Merlin for his failures with both Mordred and Morgana. (That’s honestly just a constant throughout S2 - Merlin does something, Kilgharrah tears him apart for it, Merlin defends himself and his decisions, Kilgharrah reminds Merlin of his promise to set him free, Merlin swears he will, and so on and so forth. I really don’t think we need to touch on every single interaction between them in S2, as many of them are largely the same.)

But a few key points here…..

The Fires of Idirsholas

Anyone notice how every season finale, with the exception of S4, marks a major turning point in Merlin and Kilgharrah’s relationship??? Because I fucking do. anyways, quick aside before we get into the more serious stuff

Merlin knows Kilgharrah well enough to know the dragon’s just fucking around, and honestly, that makes me so happy. one of them might be a scaly asshole and the other might be a magical bastard, but goddamn, their relationship still has its moments.

So this scene is,,,,,,,,,, honestly really important, I’ll just stick a bunch of screenshots in right here and dissect it as I go

Merlin acts rashly here, there’s definitely no doubt about that, but honest to God, this is one impulsive decision where you just can’t blame him at all. Kilgharrah has backed him completely into a corner–and, in keeping with his new attitude toward Merlin in S2, Kilgharrah doesn’t bother with subtlety, Kilgharrah doesn’t even try and rely on manipulation to get Merlin exactly where he wants him to be.

It seems overt threats and brute force are the tools Kilgharrah has turned to, since he lost his command over Merlin in S1.

As we can see here, Kilgharrah does not bother to try and lightly nudge Merlin down the “right” path–why would he bother to be kind if he doesn’t absolutely have to be, after all? This is just the most complete turnaround from The Beginning of the End, and it’s absolutely astounding how smoothly, how neatly, the change in Kilgharrah comes about.

But, as we all know, the overt threats and brute force actually work. Merlin does exactly as Kilgharrah wants - he poisons Morgana, he steals a sword from the Knights of Medhir, and he frees Kilgharrah (anyone else remember the fUCKING MAGIC STAIRS THAT LITERALLY DIDN’T EXIST UNTIL MERLIN NEEDED THEM Or nah just me?? maybe Merlin magicked them up with his phenomenal cosmic powers i dunno either way i fucking hate it)

And this string of Nice Job Breaking It, Hero! decisions leads us to……

The Last Dragonlord

There’s a lot of ground to cover in this episode, honestly, but for now, let’s focus on how Kilgharrah knew Balinor.

Let’s break that shit down, because it’s really fucking important, actually. Kilgharrah knew Balinor. To that end, he must have known Merlin. Maybe he knew Merlin’s ancestry right from the start, maybe he sensed it, even, through the telepathic connection he established with Merlin in The Dragon’s Call, or maybe, the moment he laid eyes on Merlin, he simply saw so much of Balinor there, and he put it all together, but however he worked it out, Kilgharrah knew Balinor, and Kilgharrah knew Merlin must be Balinor’s son.

And Kilgharrah deliberately withheld this from Merlin.

And Kilgharrah rarely makes a move without reason. Kilgharrah has always got some sort of plan, some sort of scheme, some kind of angle to work, and that’s exactly what he has right here.

Because, God knows, if Merlin ever met Balinor, if Merlin ever learned about dragonlords, if Merlin ever had any knowledge of the magical world Kilgharrah did not personally hand to him, it would give Merlin an advantage. However small, this knowledge would give Merlin an advantage.

And Kilgharrah cannot let him have that.

i previously touched pretty heavily on this episode, and what it means for Merlin and Kilgharrah’s relationship here, so i’ll just reiterate briefly ~

Ever since Le Morte d’Arthur, Merlin and Kilgharrah’s relationship has headed for something serious, something major–if all the bits of S2 weren’t enough to foreshadow that, Merlin’s final promise to free Kilgharrah in The Fires of Idirsholas certainly did–and that incredible tension finally comes to a head here. When Merlin discovers his own latent dragonlord abilities. When Merlin “finds the voice” that he and Kilgharrah share. When Merlin realizes Kilgharrah’s soul and his are “brothers”.

Oh, no, Merlin doesn’t forgive Kilgharrah here–and that’s what most powerful about it, in all honesty, it really just wouldn’t have packed the same punch, if Merlin had truly buried the hatchet here. But he doesn’t. The hard edges of his anger soften, he sees revenge is a pathetic and pointless thing to try and exact from Kilgharrah, and he sees he has laid unnecessary and unfair blame on Kilgharrah. But he doesn’t forgive Kilgharrah. Not at all.

And Kilgharrah doesn’t forgive Merlin.

Kilgharrah comes to respect Merlin. Up until now, Kilgharrah has seen Merlin as little more than a child–foolish and naive and entirely dependent on others, too easily tricked, too easy to take advantage of, too quick to trust, too quick to love, too quick to give his heart away–and while that perspective isn’t necessarily unfair, it’s not the whole picture, either. Merlin isn’t just a child. Merlin isn’t just foolish and naive and gullible.

And for the first time, Kilgharrah really sees that. Kilgharrah has believed, up until right this moment, that Merlin’s heart, Merlin’s compassion, Merlin’s love, would lead him to his death, to Arthur’s death, to the fall of Camelot, to the failure of the prophecy. Kilgharrah didn’t truly believe Merlin could achieve his destiny. Not until right now.

Because, for the first time, Merlin’s heart, Merlin’s compassion, Merlin’s love, serves Kilgharrah.

Merlin shows Kilgharrah mercy (and commands him to “do the same to others”) and in the face of such an unexpected and undeserved kindness, Kilgharrah finally sees Merlin in his entirety.

And Kilgharrah comes to respect Merlin.

Something fundamental has shifted between them. Something has changed here tonight, and it’s immediately obvious right from their very first scene together in S3.

If that - and the gentle, almost sweet way Kilgharrah cares for Merlin here - didn’t already indicate a serious shift in their dynamic, the rest of it certainly does.

If The Last Dragonlord wasn’t a thing, do you really think Kilgharrah would ever have said Merlin “showed great courage” when he followed his heart? Yeah. Neither do I. Oh, and then Kilgharrah allows Merlin to ride upon his back all the way to Camelot.

What a blatant change from S2, don’t you think? But the conflict between Merlin and Kilgharrah isn’t entirely over. With two such obstinate, contrary personalities, it’s almost inevitable, to tell the truth.

But The Crystal Cave is, I think, the first true example of how Merlin, rather than Kilgharrah, holds all the power in their relationship now.

In S1, Kilgharrah convinced Merlin he did not get to say no.

In S3, Merlin proves Kilgharrah truly does not get to say no. Kilgharrah has absolutely no choice in this, Kilgharrah has absolutely no power or control or command here. It all lies with Merlin. And Merlin is so damned out of line.

Don’t misunderstand me. It’s wonderful that Merlin has finally learned how to handle himself around Kilgharrah. He has finally learned how to stand on his own and stick to his guns, he has finally proven Kilgharrah cannot lead him around blindly as in S1.

But Merlin is out of line here. Merlin does mistreat Kilgharrah here. Merlin does abuse his power here. And that’s not okay.

Kilgharrah isn’t the sole “bad guy” in this dynamic, and Merlin is not his helpless, defenseless victim. It’s not so simple as all that. The minute the power is placed in Merlin’s hands, he uses it. He is every bit as cruel to Kilgharrah as Kilgharrah has ever been to him.

(something very interesting to note here: Merlin waits to see what Kilgharrah will do. He’s already given his orders, there is little more Kilgharrah can do, but Merlin is genuinely curious to see if a dragon can truly shake off his control. As we see in Kilgharrah’s acquiescence mere moments later, he cannot. this has nothing to do with anything, I just really like the little detail.)

Kilgharrah and Merlin never resolve this conflict, but the next time they get together, in The Coming of Arthur, things appear to be back to normal. There’s no lasting anger on either side. Kilgharrah even proclaims his loyalty to Merlin, and lets Merlin ride upon his back again.

In The Darkest Hour, the year’s gap has clearly only served to strengthen Merlin and Kilgharrah’s relationship even further.

Kilgharrah’s confession here is powerful enough all on its own, but the soft, sorrowful way he says it really plays up how much he would truly miss Merlin, were he to lose him now. Even Kilgharrah in S3 hadn’t yet developed enough–or, in truth, softened enough–to grieve Merlin as he does here.

And yet, for all of that, Kilgharrah’s character stays mostly the same, right up until the end of the series. Yes, he has come to care about Merlin now - he doesn’t even try to deny it - and yet, he still cares for himself and his own plans more.

And he makes that pretty clear in Aithusa.

To be fair to Kilgharrah, Merlin’s hesitation here is merely that - a hesitation. He is going to go after the egg. He is going to rescue Aithusa. He’s already made up his mind. He just needs a little push, and Kilgharrah’s intention here is simply to provide him with that push.

But guilt didn’t need to be that push. Guilt shouldn’t have been that push. The inherent malice in a mention of Merlin’s father felt cruel. Like a step backward for Kilgharrah and his growth. Like he hadn’t changed at all since S1.

And it felt right! Kilgharrah shouldn’t have to change the very essence of who he is, as a character, as a person, to prove how much he has grown. He has grown! By leaps and bounds, he has grown, and this is not an erasure of that growth, this is a reminder that all that growth will not turn him into a pure or wholesome or unproblematic character.

If you really need a further demonstration of Kilgharrah’s development over the course of the series, just look at his reaction when he hears Aithusa’s egg is still out there somewhere.

This is not an act. This is real. Kilgharrah is overjoyed at the idea that he will not have to be alone any longer, and it astounds me, still, how truly open with Merlin he is here, how freely he expresses himself. Even as late as S3, Kilgharrah takes care to cloak and conceal his emotions even from his dragonlord, and to see him so candid is honestly a bit of a shock.

Kilgharrah has come to trust Merlin enough to be honest with him, to be open with him. For that alone, this moment is one of the most important the two share over the course of the series.

also, this episode is my personal favorite from S4, so have a rare glimpse of Merlin and Kilgharrah being happy together:

We don’t see much of Kilgharrah from here on out - in fact, we don’t see him in S4 at all after this - except his brief appearance in The Sword in the Stone ((which was hella rad, by the way, don’t ever piss one Merlin Emrys off or he will just call up a fucking dragon to rain down literal hellfire on you i guess)) - but the times we do see him are very important!

The Kindness of Strangers

Raise your hand if this episode just utterly wrecked you, because,,,,,,,,,, uh,,,,,,, yeah,,,,,,,, as the kids say,,,,,,,, “big same”,,,,,,,,,,

Merlin and Kilgharrah’s time together is actually very short, in this episode, but all the more poignant and impactful for that. It’s clear right from the first moment Merlin opens his mouth that the dynamic between the two of them has evolved yet again. Aithusa definitely planted the seeds for this new and stronger relationship, but it’s only here we get to see those seeds truly blossom.

So, yes, there are definite echoes of Aithusa here–Kilgharrah is honest, he’s candid, he’s open with his emotions, but unlike in Aithusa, he’s much freer with his affection for Merlin. Sure, he’s certainly had his moments (The Darkest Hour jumps readily to mind) but even so, he’s never been quite this quick to confess how much he’s truly come to care for Merlin.

And it’s a rare thing, really, to see Merlin so relaxed around Kilgharrah. It’s taken the two of them a long time to grow so comfortable with each other, and it’s wonderful to finally get to see it!

………oh, yeah, and then there’s this

So this is kind of branded into my memory (listen, I was already braced for Arthur’s death, okay, I did not expect to lose Kilgharrah, too, and if you think I didn’t cry literal buckets after this episode, you are fucking WRONG) but the bits that really stick out?

“What will I do without you?” “It is the cycle of life–no more, no less.”

The two of them have really just come such a long way, haven’t they? Remember in S1, when Merlin was merely a means to an end for Kilgharrah? Remember in S2, when Kilgharrah was nothing more than a necessary evil to Merlin?

Now, Merlin cannot imagine his life without Kilgharrah and now, Kilgharrah tries to ease Merlin’s grief and sorrow in any way he can.

Which, actually, is the exact same thing he does in

The Diamond of the Day

Kilgharrah has just seen Merlin fail, in the worst and most enormous way possible. Destiny has finally come to fruition, and Emrys himself was not strong enough to stop it.

And yet, Kilgharrah - who, in the past, has never hesitated to point out all the ways Merlin went wrong, no matter how Merlin feels in the moment - offers nothing but comfort, and the first glimmers of hope for the future.

A little hard to believe, isn’t it, that this is the same dragon we met in S1. damn it’s been literal years and i’m STILL shook over the drastic change in the two of them.

Though the core of the characters remain largely consistent, the two of them truly just shape each other so much as the series goes on.

Merlin would not be the person he is in S5 without Kilgharrah, and Kilgharrah would not be the person he is in S5 without Merlin.

thanks for coming to my TED talk ~

#merlin #bbc merlin #ask #anonymous

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dreamterlude · 5 years

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druck s3e01, a review

As promised, here's the very long, very messy s3e01 review, clip by clip!

CLIP 1

Right from the start, I really like the way you can feel Matteo's solitude thanks to the use of the music and how it "stops" when the camera's on him, I think it's a really smart move to show how he feels, like he's worlds apart, detached from all what's happening around him.

Then the shot changes from a guy's hands, a girl with a gut tattoo (absolutely love it) and a girl's ass, Idk if this has any purpose but it's still a cool effect, so kudos to the cinematography.

The moment Matteo stands up and goes to the bathroom but Sara stops him and kisses him really sets the tone of their relationship: Matteo's face when kissing Sara says a lot about his situation, like he's hugging her but at the same time he's not happy about it, his face shows apathy and resignation.

Really really loved the scene with the boys in the bathtub!! I think it does an awesome job at "introducing" (we already knew them) them. They talk about some sex position and act like dumbasses, but again Matteo feels like he's not there.

The shot of Matteo looking at himself in the mirror goes deeper into his confused and ausent kinda aura, it's as if he was wondering what is he doing there in that party, what is he doing with his life in general, which honestly? hella relatable.

HIGHLIGHTS: Boys gang's one common braincell, "Kiki is the hypotenuse", Dónde está mi gente playing in the background.

CLIP 2

First of all I love Matteo's room and I can't wait to see more of it!

The song choice is so on point for this scene like wow, it really helps the whole "lazy morning after" mood and also has a high melancholic vibe, which is (imo) very Matteo.

Also, the use of the lyrics!!! "I woke up but it didn't go away" right before Matteo sees his mother's message, "did you expect me to cry" when he's touching Jonas' hair and "will you not think of me tonight" when he sees the number on Jonas' arm. So far Druck has been exceptionally good at the song choices and the way they use them so I'm not exactly surprised at how good this was.

Bringing back the moment Matteo touched Jonas' hair because it was really important!! I made a post about this, but the fact that Matteo only shows this softer side of him because he's "alone" says a lot about himself and it's actually really sad. Not only that, this moment also shows that he's not over Jonas, and that makes a lot of sense for me, because he seemed to be really into him back in s1 (s2 too but especially s1).

HIGHLIGHTS: "Why are you in Matteo"s bed" "I could ask the same" " I was waiting for you", Matteo's tracksuit + grandpa jacket combination, we love a fashion icon.

CLIP 3

Right from the beginning, the absolute chaotic gay energy of Matteo replying to Sara's pic with "cool" and the shrug after that, he's not even trying, he doesn't know what to do or how he got himself into that situation.

Once again, when talking to his friends and the girls it seems like his body is there but hia mind is miles apart. Also!! when Sam tells him about how good the party was and he agrees even though it's clear (for the viewer) that he didn't have a good time, I think this is a good way to show the viewers Matteo's "wish" to fit in, and how he's always pretending.

And then!! The Scene!!!! I've talked about this on other posts but the way Matteo and David checked each other out was so not subtle, I loved it. The slow-motion, the song choice, the moment their stares connected, then again when both of them turned their heads to keep looking... what can I say except poetic cinema.

Also major kudos to Michelangelo for Matteo's slight facial change, it really shows that the encounter with David shook him up, even though he still doesn't know why.

HIGHLIGHTS: The way Hanna looked at Jonas! I love that Druck doesn't forget about past plots and instead continues them with little details like this.

Unrelated but Matteo I'm begging you please wear a fucking belt.

CLIP 4

First of all, what's up with the teachers not wearing bras??? I have nothing against women choosing not to wear bras but like, why is this a recurring theme for the "Isak" season?? I honestly don't get it.

I don't think there's a lot to comment in this clip, it's basically a way to introduce Matteo and Amira's friendship (something I'm hella excited for) and to set the date for The Meeting™.

That being said, there were little things that made me love this clip, like Matteo's body language. The way he shrugs and rolls his eyes, you can really feel how (physically and emotionally) tired he is just by looking at him. You don't have to understand german to know what he's thinking, you can get a sense of it based on the way he acts!! All this is thanks to Michelangelo for being so fucking good at acting, like wow.

Another thing I liked was Matteo's mood getting worse after seeing Jonas flirt with that girl, as I've said before I like that they're showing us that he's still not completely over him, it makes it more real to me.

HIGHLIGHTS: Amira looking like a goddess in that pink hijab, Matteo's "nein" when the teacher called him out, the masterpiece that is "Idk, a blowjob".

CLIP 5

Once again, I love Matteo's room!! That yoga cushion he was using? a comfortable king.

There are 4 things that I want to talk about in this clip, first, Matteo texting his friends that he's also "busy". As I've said in the clips above, he really feels that he has to pretend to be someone he isn't and that's such a realistic side of being in the closet, I feel like Druck is doing a good job in showing that.

Then, the fact that he doesn't close his eyes when kissing Sara. He's not invested in the kiss (for obvious reasons) and he just wishes it would end, but at the same time he doesn't neglect it? Like he's in a level of resignation where he doesn't care anymore.

I feel like I mention this way too much but!! the body language!!! it's so important in a character like Matteo, who (so far) doesn't seem to be very talkative. When Sara asks him if they're together, you can see how uncomfortable he is with the idea but at the same time it's like he's trying to convince himself that this (being with Sara) is how things are supposed to be. Which, not gonna lie, is sad as fuck.

And finally, the moment in which Matteo asks Sara if she wants to watch a movie with him. She was clearly expecting something else (her face says it all), but Matteo looks content, almost happy. Maybe because of the relief he feels since he doesn't have to kiss her?? or maybe because he has someone keeping him company, someone that likes him and is affectionate with him. In this sense, I feel like Matteo is using Sara not only to pretend he's straight, but also as an emotional support, sort of. Based on the scene in the 2nd clip, he seems like a very touch starved person, craving for some affection, and right now the one who can help with that is Sara.

HIGHLIGHTS: "Should I do some research?" Matteo you absolute disaster gay. Sara being cute and lovely (I really hope she's not like other Emmas).

CLIP 6 aka The Clip™

Okay with this clip I'm going straight to Matteo and David's interactions because this is getting really long, rip.

The way Matteo's whole aura changes around David!! He's really trying hard to come off as a cool guy but David is highkey having none of that shit, I love it. Like when Matteo puts the joint on his ear and says "come on", excuse me? who is this smooth motherfucker and what has he done to my gremlin son? For real now, I love that we got to see this side of Matteo, and I'm really really excited to see more of it.

But also the way David was checking Matteo out when he was looking for the joint like, wow, he seems to really like him already (and I don't even mean in a romantic way, not yet).

The whole conversation they had is a masterpiece and I could say a lot about it, but my favorite parts would be as they follow:

David saying he "murdered someone" (the metaphor is strong here) and the subsequent "I murdered my parents joke" that comes from it. Weird humor sense but Matteo seems to like it, in fact he laughs! for the first time since the season started he seems to be present, invested in the moment, laughing!! Rewatching the episode, the change in Matteo's behaviour is really noticeable, he went from being ausent around his friends and Sara to being incredibly "present" during his conversation with David. Let me just say: poetic cinema.

But also the fact that Matteo hides his smile really quick, like he's still being guarded, like he didn't expect David to make him feel.

The!! eyelash!! thing!! This was such a nice, kinda awkward moment, absolutely my favorite one. Matteo growing some confidence and asking if he gets to make a wish now, licking his lips while looking at David, like... wow. I absolutely love that David asked him what would he had wished for, because it gave us some insight to Matteo's situation: he just wants to go away, which considering all he's been through, makes a lot of sense.

It also gave us some information about David! he said he also wanted to get away and go to Detroit, since that was where the best music came from. I like that with this simple conversation we got to know more about both of them.

Then, the way David's mood changed when Sara came in and kissed Matteo, he looked so... disappointed? He was like "gtg". Also, something I noticed rewatching the episode: when he said goodbye he only looked at Matteo!!

And last but not least, when Sara said "that's him, the guy Leonie has a crush on" and Matteo replied with "no I think that's someone else", I'm genuinely curious about this?? What is Matteo trying to do here?? I guess we'll have to wait 👀

HIGHLIGHTS: Amira, Sam and Kiki looking pretty as always, Matteo's face when Kiki suggested hugging teachers, Photoshop Markus, David's smile.

Anyways, that's it!! This got really long but I had a lot to say!! Druck has officially become my favorite remake, so I might do a review per episode if you guys like it uwu ♡

#druck #druck review #i talk a lot #sorry if im annoying fjshf #this probably has a lot of typos but ive been at it for two days fjsjd

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bedlamsbard · 5 years

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It’s interesting rewatching a show that you originally watched as it was airing -- I didn’t watch a lot of TV live (ish -- episode by episode as it aired, I mean, same or next day; I didn’t have a TV in college and was watching on the network websites) and I’m not totally certain what shows I watched from start to finish on that timeline. The Unit, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, Fringe -- I think that’s actually it, aside from Rebels. (I didn’t start watching TCW until near the end of S4.) A couple I picked up after the first season had already gone to DVD (Eureka, Jericho), or started at the beginning but dropped at some point (Supernatural -- I think I stopped around S3, S4 -- and Friday Night Lights). There are plenty of things I was in the fandom for but couldn’t watch live for various reasons (Stargate SG-1, SGA, Buffy -- this was back when fen would transcribe the episodes, so I read all the transcriptions of both BtVS and AtS, but still have never seen most of the eps). Really my college years were just about the golden age of my watching TV, since I was at school and had a faster internet connection than I did at home, so I could stream stuff on my laptop, but a lot of my formative influence television dates from about 2006-2012, so high school through college.

Anyway, this is a long way of saying I’ve been rewatching Fringe, possibly for the first time since it originally aired back in 2008, and first of all, holy shit Olivia and I are the same age now, I don’t know how to deal with that fact. I rewatched Jericho and the first season and a half of The Unit last year, and I’m just...I guess I’m just always really surprised at how specifically TV will date to a specific couple years in time? Of course the mid/late-’00s were when I was first really starting to be aware of both wider world events and trends in TV/film/fiction; I was already active in fandom, but this was also when some of those canons for various fandoms were starting to become accessible to me for the first time. (Checking, this is also around when (a) Netflix’s DVD rentals started to really take off and (b) when Netflix started streaming a few years later. But I still remember trying to get Smallville and BtVS DVDs from my local Hollywood Video and Blockbuster.) (My public library has them now, but definitely did not in 2005.)

...I don’t remember where I was going with this. Oh, yes, now I remember. Anyway, I wrapped up S1 tonight, which has a pretty dramatic last shot (if you haven’t seen it, I don’t want to spoil it even though it’s ten years old), and I was just remembering how much of a shock it was to see in 2009 when it first aired. It’s weird going back to things. I don’t really have that experience with media I engage with pretty deeply (i.e., Star Wars) because I go back to it over and over again; I can’t remember the first time I saw or read it. Or with something like Outlander, where I read the books almost twenty years ago (yes, I was too young for them), watching the show is a completely different kind of emotional experience. (I cried during the series premiere.) It’s weird going back to stuff. Sometimes it’s good weird. Sometimes it’s bad weird. Sometimes it’s just An Experience.

#your girl #bedlam watches television

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faithandfearcollide · 6 years

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OUAT rewatch: 1x09 - True North

Henry the comic book nerd.

This is actually heartbreaking. He's so happy to have a friend.

He knew they stole stuff but somehow had no idea how?

Not a doubt in Regina's mind that Henry's telling the truth. Aww

...in retrospect it's sort of hilarious considering he's both been lying to her and always has candy in his bag...but awww.

I’ll always love the ‘arm-around-the-shoulder’ moments in S1. Throwback to S1-2 hiatus when that was all us Regal Believer’s had to gif and make fanart with. The struggle bro.

I like the visual and dialogue transitions in this first bit of the episode.

What would they have done if she didn't drive away before they walked inside? Fun fact: My mom always waits to make sure I've enter the location I’m at before driving away. Not as a distrust thing but so that she knows I’m where I need to be safely. She still does that in my adult years.

Emma: Yeah, the system I knew and was in for sixteen years. Do you know what happens? They get thrown into homes where they are a meal ticket – nothing more. These families get paid for these kids and as soon as they’re too much work, they get tossed out and it all starts over again.

I know Emma's views on the system are a controversial and touchy subject in fandom and the writers are criticized for them-- but I wholeheartedly sympathize with her viewpoint here and, as someone who was also in the system for a far shorter time than she was, I probably would have done the same thing in her situation. In fact, I have.

I know there are families and homes out there that are good and caring and legitimately want to help kids. I do understand that side. But in my experience there's a lot more that aren't...or weren't anyway. I remember feeling like just a meal ticket.

I think over time it's gotten better but it use to be, more often than not, a bad situation. So the idea of Emma never finding a good home in all those years isn't hard to believe. And if those are the only experiences you have, being bitter towards the system isn’t crazy and her reluctance to bring social services in makes sense.

Regina is being shockingly open and giving of information here...also calm. She’s not her usual snippy self.

Regina: You need to have them in Boston tonight. Emma: Me? Regina: Well, you wanted to be Sheriff. This is what sheriffs do. Yes, you’re taking them.

I wonder, was Regina's goal here to get Emma attached enough to want to leave town and adopt them herself?

She’s just very pretty and I’d like to take a moment to appreciate that.

Fireman...Baelfire...why am I only just now making that connection?

Did Emma come up with all of this on the spot? That’s a convincing amount of bullshit.

I'm conflicted on what Emma's doing here. On the one hand she’s trying to keep from hurting Henry with the reality that not only did one of his parents leave him, but two.

But on the other, it adds a different layer of pain. The “What if my dad didn’t die, would things have been different” kind of pain. I don’t think that would have helped Henry in the long run.

You dumb little kid. istg

Rumple you suave bastard. Bobby adds so much to this character.

Emma: What’s your price? Mr. Gold: Forgiveness. Emma: How about tolerance?

(Out of context these screencaps came out looking way more uncomfortably flirtation than I meant for them to look)

Michael: I met her when I was camping and we, um…

Random thing I really like about season 1 was little details like this. I like how some of they're cursed backstories are just modernized versions of their EF pasts.

Hansel: Gretel, she’s going to cook me! We’ve got to do something – quick! [...] She’s coming! She’s coming – I can’t do it! I’m going to die!

This kid is hilarious. I really did like the young actors they got for these parts.

The iconic apple moment.

Hansel: You mean that we get to live in a castle?

I’ve no doubt in my mind this kid would 100% sell his siblings out for some Turkish delight.

Gretel: No. We want our father back. He would never abandon us. And even if he did, we would never want to live with someone as terrible as you.

Regina, you did kinda sorta just admit to getting a bunch of kids killed. This can’t come as a shock to you.

Hello darlings.

(There’s so little Regal Believer in S1, I’m taking it where I can get it.)

Regina: Tell me why. Hm? Why did your children refuse me? Father: Because we’re a family. And family always finds one another.

Regina having to ask this question really speaks to how truly fucked up she’s become as a person and how far she's fallen down into darkness. The fact that she doesn't even understand how love or loyalty or the meaning of family works anymore is super heartbreaking. She was once was willing to give up everything to be the wife of a lowly stable boy because she loved him. Tragic.

I find it interesting she didn't just kill him but she released him on precedence that he prove his words.

Lana...you’re acting. Staaawp. My heart can’t take this.

This was beautiful. I still get a little teary watching this.

I can't even express how much I love this scene. Probably my favorite moment between Snow and Emma. I didn’t expect Emma to tell her about who Henry thought she was so it was a pleasant surprise that she did. I love the banter between them over it and that, even though they don’t believe it, they still have this sweet and genuine moment over the idea.

Mary Margaret: You do kind of have my chin.

Emma: Henry, about your father… Henry: Yeah?

Emma: I’m glad I told you. Henry: Me too.

*Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh*

Hello August.

I remember watching this and thinking "Really? It's been all of an episode since Graham's death and in rides the next leather clad bad boy to swoop Emma up. Can't go an episode without a love interest." And then they didn't go there at all. Pleasant surprise.

They managed to at least wait out the season with Emma before tying her exclusively to men for the rest of her story. Good on them?

#once upon a time #ouat rewatch #watching fairytales #ouat #picspam

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brionbroadway · 6 years

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Heyy!!! I just rewatched s1 and i was thinking what would have happened if eva actually went into isak's house when his dad left (you know where jonas said he would be happy to see her) could you maybe write something like that? :)

CAN I?

(Yes, this is my favourite prompt, thank you, I love you).

—

Eva shouldn’t be here, but she always is.

Ever since Jonas met her, Isak couldn’t look at him without looking at her, couldn’t talk to him without talking to her, couldn’t hear his laugh without hearing hers. Even when he was with Ingrid. (Isak didn’t like Ingrid, but he liked her with Jonas. She was barely there).

So, he’s not surprised when he hears her. Of fucking course she’s here.

“I don’t want to intrude, or make things weird–I can call him later.”

No point in that. After the first missed call from her, Isak turned his phone off. He couldn’t handle thinking it was his dad.

“No, you should go in. He’s probably sick of me by now.”

“That’s true.”

They laugh. They’re wrong.

“I was thinking I’d get us some food anyway. And beer.”

“Definitely a situation that calls for beer.”

They laugh. They’re right.

Isak hears the door close as Jonas leaves, then footsteps as Eva walks closer. And he’s pissed, he’s so fucking pissed. Eva always has to be here, but he wants Jonas and only Jonas.

He tries to stop crying.

“Hi?”

Eva’s hesitance is unsettling. She’s not shy with her kindness, opinions, or humour, all of which Isak begrudgingly likes. Now, she’s looking at him like she doesn’t quite know her place. “Hey.”

“I’m really sorry about everything.”

“Thanks.”

That’s all it needs to be, but Eva shakes her head like she’s disagreeing with herself. “Sorry. That’s such a shitty, cliche thing to say.”

“Kind of.”

He expects her to laugh, but she doesn’t.

“I won’t tell you I understand because I don’t, but you know, I’m alone a lot. I know what’s that like and how much it sucks.” She pauses like she wants to add something, but shakes her head again. “I hate being at home because it’s so quiet.”

Maybe she’s always here because she had to go somewhere. Isak understands that. “Yeah.”

“I probably shouldn’t stay. I, uh, left you some voicemails? Just delete them. I just hope you’re ok tonight.”

Isak doesn’t say goodbye because he’s learned that people will leave anyway.

And he’s still pissed, he’s so fucking pissed. Eva shouldn’t have come over. She doesn’t always have to be here, but she is anyway.

Alone in his house, Isak starts crying again. It’s the only way he can keep feeling angry.

He never appreciated that Eva was here, and he suspects he’ll lose her too.

#whoops it is sad?#and not particularly good but it is a thing #skamfwn #skam fic #skam fanfiction #skam fanfic #isak valtersen #eva kviig mohn #drabbles #asks

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spaceorphan18 · 6 years

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TDB Rewatch: Duets

I had a brilliant steak fajita dinner tonight made from scratch. That has nothing to do with Glee, I just wanted to share, because it was super enjoyable to eat while watching such a brilliant episode.

I’m a little surprised it’s an Ian Brennan episode - because for the most part, he writes the episodes from RIB I don’t like at all - but TV is a collaborative thing, so maybe he had helped. The thing that just blows me away about this episode every time I come to it is that all the story lines are so nicely weaved all together. This is great writing - and they’re able to balance their very huge cast in a fantastic way. This is so much Glee at its very best.

I’m also noticing a trend, too, with season two that I want to watch closely. Sue was completely absent in this one, and Will was a minor character - pushing along the narrative via the competition, but his drama is not around for this one. This story is solely about the kids and their interactions with each other, and I think because of all of that it really shines, as there’s so many interesting things going on within the dynamic of this group. So far, the weaker episodes have been ones that have heavily featured Will (and kinda Sue) - hence the lopsided nature of season two.

Anyway, thoughts:

Really, I can’t say enough the writing is so brilliant in this one (with the exception of the ridiculous narrative surrounding Finchel and why they should lose). The thing is, all of the kids have something to do, and all of their plots are connected in this big web, and it’s just so cool to look at.

Let’s start with Kurt, whom I love and have talked much about his story. This episode is so hard for him, the angst over Sam!!, caring for his dad, trying to go on even when people are beating him down -- I just love it, and I’m bouncing on the edge of my seat waiting to get to Never Been Kissed. You’re almost there sweetie!!

Le Jazz Hot is an amazing performance, and I grin every time I watch it.

I love Rachel watching Kurt throughout this episode (and earlier ones). One nice thing about Hummelberry (tbh) is that I do think it lets Rachel care for someone other than herself. I mean, she still sees a lot of Kurt in herself (and they are alike). But there’s a kind, kindred spirit thing going on here. (I kind of like this dynamic more than the “platonic souldmates” thing we get later on - yes there is a difference.)

Happy Days/Get Happy is one of my favorite duets on the show - it’s just so amazing. I can’t gush about it enough.

Finchel was entertaining! Their reason for throwing the competition was a bit ridiculous, and made no sense but at least they were entertaining.

Even the Finchel duets were stronger than in season 1 - probably because there’s been less of them, and also because Cory grew as a singer. Still -- they were my least favorite duets of the episode. Sorry guys.

Finn still feels a little out of line telling Kurt essentially that he’s an awful choice of partner because of who he is. I realize this stems from criticisms of Kurt’s S1 story line, but it still rubs me the wrong way. I’m glad Sam called him out on being shitty.

SAM! He’s really utterly delightful and sweet here. He and Quinn really don’t make any sense, and I can see why it fizzled out quickly, but they do have a nice musical quality to them. Lucky was sweet. (and oh the Kurt looks)

Quinn is such a smart cookie. She’s very good in her intuition. Shame the narrative never really knew what to do with her.

Puck’s in Juvie for the episode (because Mark was being punished for releasing an album not on Fox’s (or whoevers) term). The show was fine without him.

It’s funny to me that Brittana really starts up here - only to be dropped for about ten episodes. Their scenes work well and are a bit racy for as ‘gay’ as they are. I’m surprised they were allowed it (though if you watch, they never actually kiss).

Santana as an angry, closeted woman makes sense.

Brittany has more feelings than she’s given credit for. She does care about Santana, and she does care about Artie. And I think sex means something to her, actually, even if it’s in a different way than others.

It’s Brittany and Artie time folks. I should have an opinion. But I kinda don’t.

There’s this weird little subplot in the beginning of season 2 about Artie trying to get over Tina. I never really noticed it before. Huh. The show cared more than I thought it did.

Mike and Tina! Tina still has slight feelings for Artie. Mike and Tina are having issues that will eventually be what breaks them up. (The show could have really done something other than put an “they’re Asian” label on them and forget about it - because that’s a little what it feels like here.) But they have a great duet in Sing! - and it’s a nice little moment for them since they don’t get a lot of them.

Santana’s having a hard time in this episode, too, interestingly.

My god Santana and her love of Breadstix is totally hilarious.

Mercedes is really sad at the beginning of this episode - which I think stems a little from the previous episode, and the fact that Kurt seems preoccupied with his own issues. It makes me sad for her.

I wish Mercedes and Santana had been allowed to form a stronger friendship while they were in high school. It would have made the Treble Tones stuff in s3 feel a little stronger.

I think I got everyone, right?

Anyway - this episode is just. so. good. Are we at Blaine yet? Do we really need to watch Rocky Horror?!? Ug.

#tdb rewatch #todaydreambelievers

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