#anobrain like friends do
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Show Me Yours | Matty Healy [13]
chapter thirteen, act two: anobrain
masterlist
November 1st 2013
Tommie has always felt like out of all the places in America, New York would be scariest. It's big and that's where all the big American crime drama shows she watches are set, with things like the mafia or random serial killers.
But no, LA, is by far, the scariest place she has visited.
With people screaming as you pass by, strangers trying to sell you CDs and monks handing out bracelets. The dress up characters (something she used to be afraid of as a child), getting handsy as you walk through the touristy parts creeped her out, and if one more person tried to hand her a flower she was going to scream.
Not even Times Square was this bad.
Her anxiety was getting the better of her and the deeper they got into the walk of fame the more she clung onto Matty’s arm.
He’d sensed her anxiety a while back and had kept closer as the other three oblivious men (of course men, what anxieties do they need to have while walking down a street in the night) walked on ahead.
“Do you want to turn back?”
She shakes her head, “I’d rather not go back through all of them.”
He grins as they get closer to the loud music of this pub a friend had recommended, “Almost there anyway, we’ll get a taxi back from right outside when we’re done, yeah?”
She nods quickly, “Okay.”
His hand lifts to play with some strands of her hair, she’d had a shower before they left and hadn’t had time to dry it, so it was a curly wavy mess.
“I like your hair like this.”
“Really?”
He nods, pulling on it and watching the curl bounce back into place, “It’s messy but put together at the same time, like you. It suits you.”
Tommie stuck by him all night, they both shared a drink, they only did one shot, a couple ciders, and had two G&T’s.
About an hour after Tommie had finished sipping on her orange gin and tonic she and Matty had ordered an uber from right outside and gone back to the hotel, leaving the other three in the bar, all of them too far gone with John running around after them.
In the lift Tommie sighs, leaning back against the wall as she kicks off the heels that George’s date for the night had let her borrow.
She leans down to rub at her left foot while struggling to undo the strap of the right one at the same time.
Matty gives a lopsided smile and kneels down to help her, he taps his knee and she holds her weight on the railing so her aching foot doesn’t take all the weight.
It’s a little hard in her tipsy head but she manages to hold herself upright.
He carefully undoes the strap, slides off the heel, and then delicately places her foot back down, his hand following his movements up her bare leg slowly as he stands.
Her shoes now in his free hand until she stands upright and shoves it into the pocket of his skinny jeans.
“God,” She groans and grimaces, “Did you see that one couple?”
He nods, “The ones that were practically having sex on the table?”
She nods trying to rid the image of the girl lying flat on her back with the guy on top of her, “What ever happened to hello?” She wonders.
“Boys and girls in America have such a sad time together; sophistication demands that they submit to sex immediately without proper preliminary talk. Not courting talk — real straight talk about souls, for life is holy and every moment is precious.”
She rolls her eyes, “Stop quoting that book all the time, you twat.”
“Can’t help it,” He shrugs, “Read it so much it's engraved in my brain. Like you with fantastic mr fox. Guarantee you could quote that film word for word.”
“I can’t.”
He nudges her hip with his, “Don’t lie, you definitely can.”
She shrugs her shoulders, “Maybe a few scenes.”
She looks him up and down, “Are you not hot?”
“I’ve been told I am.” He says cheekily leaning to her.
She rolls her eyes, shoving him out the lift when it stops on their floor, “I meant warm, physically, it’s bloody boiling out here.”
“You just think that ‘cause you’re ginger.”
“No, I think that ‘cause I’ve sweat through three t-shirts today.”
She groans as she tries digging around in her pocket, “What?”
“I’m sharing with Ross, he has my key card.”
He pulls his from the back pocket, “I was supposed to be sharing with George until he ditched me for that bird he met a couple days ago, so I have a free bed.”
She smiles, following him inside, “Life saver, you.”
She faceplants the first bed she comes across but he tugs at the foot that hangs off the bed, “Uh uh, my bed’s always the one closest to the door.”
“Why? You gonna fight off any attackers with that pigeon chest?”
He laughs sarcastically, “I was thinking more if anything goes wrong I can run out the fastest.”
“My knight in shining armour, you are.”
He says nothing, just aggressively throws her a pair of shorts an old the cure t-shirt, she’s halfway through pulling it, looking at her tired face in the bathroom mirror that she realises it's her own shirt she lost about four months ago on the tour.
“Hey!”
She rips open the bathroom door and he looks up, “What?”
“I’ve been looking for this top.”
“It’s mine.”
She shakes her head, “No, Adam bought me this when you guys went to that concert a couple years ago. It was my christmas present, my mam spilt wine on it and it stained, look!”
She shoves the stain into his face and he leans back, pushing his glasses up on top of his head.
“Well, it looks better on me anyway.” He says, holding back the smirk.
She grins and pushes him so he falls back on the bed, “Ow, not funny, think I landed on the remote.”
He winces and she feels slightly bad, slightly.
“Pull me up so I can get dressed.”
“Get up yourself.”
“Think it’s only fair after the attempted assault I just endured.”
Rolling her eyes she holds her hands out and he grips them both, he starts pulling himself up but he uses all his body weight to fall back and pull her down with him.
She laughs, bending his arm awkwardly to hold him down, “Tap out.”
“No.”
He tries to twist around but only ends up with her overpowering him even more, “Tap out. I’ll break your arm, Roddy, not even joking.”
He flips her off and they play fight for a while giggles and tickles being passed around until eventually she pinning his arms above his head and panting heavily.
She grins down at him but there’s no humour on his face, his eyes are lidded, head slightly tilted back to stare up at her.
“I won.”
“Mhmm.”
He bites down on his lip and she watches as he has some internal battle behind his eyes as they flicker around her face.
She leans back a little, grip loosening, “Matt-”
He moves forward quickly, sitting up, one hand holding him up on the bed, the other circling around to her back to hold her there as his lips land on hers.
It’s a quick and harsh peck, his bottom lip between hers, their noses pressed into each other's cheeks creating indentations of each other.
He pulls back, doesn’t say a thing as he looks at her, assessing her.
He knows her.
He knows that the softness of her eyes means she at least didn’t hate it. Knows that the crinkle on her one eye means she’s thinking it over.
And he knows that that smile… he knows that that smile will be the death of him.
She moves forward, both her hands in his hair as she brings him closer, leaning backwards until she’s lying flat on her back and he’s on top of her.
His hands are everywhere all at once.
She’s addicting, her taste, her sound, everything about her, he can’t get enough.
One moment his hands are threading through her hair, the next they’re on her face, thumbs rubbing across her round cheeks, then they’re travelling down her arms, down her rib cage, her waist, he wants to touch parts of her no one's even thought of touching before.
He wants to know everything.
He opens his eyes, moving back so he can look, like really look, not like his usual fleeting glances where he’s afraid he’ll get caught.
She lifts herself up on her elbows, trying to chase his lips but he stops her, “Wait, I want to see you.”
She giggles, “I’m right here, Matty.”
“No, I want to see you.” He moves to kiss her cheek, “Explore you,” A kiss on her jaw, “See the way you work, the way you move, hear the way you sound when you cry my name.”
She slaps his chest, but then curls her hand around his white t-shirt to bring his lips back to hers, he mumbles into her lips, “You’re so addicting.”
“That’s just the oxytocin, darling.”
He groans into her ear, biting down on her bottom lip and pulling back, “Call me that again.”
“What? Darling?”
He nods, leaning back to pull his t-shirt off and toss it across the room, “Come here, darling.”
He smiles into the kiss as he pushes her back, their teeth clashing together as he pushes her top upwards.
She doesn’t have a bra on, and he feels himself grow harder when his hands meet her breast.
She arches her back, pushing her hips into his own, “Matty, I’ve-”
He moves his kisses to her neck, “I know. We can stop.”
She shakes her head quickly, hands gripping his shoulders, encouraging his arms to go higher, “No, no,” She shakes her head, the words leaving her lungs in one breath, “Please.”
He moves his kisses to her collar bone, tugging down on the neck of the t-shirt but still telling her, “One word, one word and we’ll stop, Tommie.”
“Just go slow,” She says, chest pushing into his, her hands squeezing his upper arms, “Be gentle.”
“Always with you.”
When Tommie thought of losing her virginity she didn’t think it would be in a hotel room in LA with her cousin’s best mate.
She thought it would be a drunken one night stand with a complete stranger to get it over and done with.
She’s glad it’s Matty.
She trusts Matty.
He finally peels the t-shirt off in a painstakingly slow manner, letting out a low guttural groan at the sigh of her bare chest in front of him, “God.”
His hands move to her shorts, tugging them down and throwing them to the pile, “One word, Tommie.” He says again, moving further down the bed to pull her underwear off too.
She doesn’t say anything, lets herself get lost in the feel of his hands and the fabric pooling at her ankles.
She doesn’t say a single thing until his hands are on her again, “Please.”
He nods, “Gonna go slow, baby,” He kisses her between her thighs, “Nice and slow.”
It was slow, and gentle, but fast and rough at the right times.
It was a mix of his moans and her loud screams of his name as they both allowed themselves to come undone around one another.
It was a mix of hands and mouths roaming each other’s bodies, exploring across freckles like stars on a constellation map.
At one point, when Matty had flipped her over, a pillow beneath her stomach, his hands pushing her shoulder blades down he’d leaned forward and quietly whispered (while still inside her). ‘You have a group of freckles shaped like a moon.’
He’d slowly traced his finger around the crescent shape on her shoulder and then leaned forward to place a kiss there.
“I know.”
Then his lips had moved to the tattoo on the other shoulder, her own words from her poem and coincidentally their song lay there.
He kissed the tattoo, lips slightly open and pushing into her skin before he dragged his bottom lip up towards the nape of her neck.
Only glancing back at the words once more before he pushed himself deeper into her.
‘I love you, don’t you mind?’
But now they lie silently beneath the covers of the bed closest to the door, he pushes the hair from her face, kissing her temple as she allows herself to nuzzle deeper into him.
“Matty?”
She yawns and he carries on playing with her hair, “Yeah, baby?”
“You know what I was saying like oxytocin and serotonin and stuff?”
He hums, “It’s not the chemicals.” She mutters quietly, “Just you.”
He smiles to himself, listening to her breath even out as she finally falls asleep, he pulls back to look down at her, head tilted as he gives her forehead one last kiss. “Good night, beautiful girl.”
Then, shifting further down the bed so he can comfortably rest his head on her chest just above her heart, he allows the sound of her to consume him until he falls asleep.
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@if-my-heart-bleeds
-let me know if you want to be added :)
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🪻 fic masterlist 🪻
howdy! links go to my ao3 (andfacedown) with full tags/descriptions/warnings. thank you for reading!
[updated May 20, 2024]
✤ ongoing producer george & TA matty AU: oneshots (2)
looked after & loved: ~1k words; vague eraly mfc era; dating matty & george. it's the middle of the night. they're on a tour bus (again) and matty can't sleep. he can hear (almost) everyone else sleeping. he wishes he could be near george. hear only george.
the way you know me: [E] post-bfiafl/atvb era; married George & Matty. matty returns home from a horribly unproductive day helping out in the studio. he feels exhausted, overstimulated, and disconnected from home—from george. he asks george, silently and then with words, to remind him of what it feels like to be home, to be loved, to be taken care of.
arriving home 04:17:43: ~590 words; george arriving home from a trip away and being greeted at the door, despite the early hour.
Where We Are Together: self titled—bfiafl era; four moments of Matty and George's developing relationship—from self-titled to bfiafl—that all center around the safety, consistency, and reliability of being in George's car together; that feeling of "you’re in a car with a beautiful boy..." (but this time he always loves you back)
do you need me? (you're all i need): early abiior/mfc tour; Matty hasn't entirely caught up to the speed of touring again (yet). His body is tired and his bones creak and his clothes don't fit in any way that feels particularly nice. George lends him his own shirt before a radio interview on their day off and Matty remembers just how it feels to be so wholly loved, and want to love in return (in any way his body can).
i can't exist inside my own head: post-bfiafl/atvb era; married George & Matty. George isn't feeling his best and feels the need to apologize to Matty for ruining their night. Based on the post "Sex is cool but has anyone stayed awake with you just because you are feeling low?"
Someone to Watch You: backstage atvb, Matty is trying to comfort George and lift his sunken, sad mood (if he could find him first...) when a crew member needs Matty to quickly watch her daughter visiting for a Mummy at Work day. Matty is definitely not her mother and definitely still needs to find George. Laughs and child-logic aside, love is the center that will always hold.
if it was you that made my body: abiior era, during their time at the country house recording studio. Matty has a (slow, almost unnoticed) panic about whether God created him, or if he was left untouched while others around him were made divine. Like George. Always his George. Matty couldn't be the only one left to struggle like this, could he?
The Hours of the Left Behind: a meditation about George's POV in the hours right after dropping Matty off at the airport for Barbados. With Ross and Adam, he just tries to remember how to function and feel and process something so difficult and complicated. Character study-type fic with a hopeful ending and plenty of best friends supporting each other.
(Be My) God and Country (2/2): the proposal/wedding fic! bfiafl/right before atvb era; Matty realizes during therapy a previous (ignored) conversation with George, about the engagement of their old neighbors, was his very subtle attempt to ask if Matty would marry him. Matty promptly resolves the misunderstanding with none of the finesse but all of the sincerity. Chapter 2 is all wedding, baby!
and we go ‘round and ‘round: the Anobrain lyric fic! Self titled era; George and Matty going for their usual, undefined drive to the outside of town. Matty says, as the song goes... "man I'm so high, I think I love you." and things go from there...
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anobrain // like friends do
a/n: TW for hypoxia (lack of oxygen), just in case someone is triggered! be safe :)
There’s a slow, dreamy dance taking place somewhere, Lauren’s sure of it; how can there not be when there’s a distant hum coming in from the outside, an autumn buzz outside of the window, and just the right amount of sunlight peeking through the maroon curtains?
Or maybe she’s just romanticising this moment, with the curls of Anobrain floating through her ears. But like, that’s her thing, just give her any Matthew Healy song and the company of a certain bandmate, and she’s already halfway through her own romance novel.
‘You okay, Lo?’
Lauren turns to face the voice, and she can’t help the dopey smile that paints itself on her lips.
'No. I’m Lo.’
Camila rolls her eyes in response, and Lauren finds her smile growing bigger, and she knows she couldn’t contain it even if she tired. She blames that on the brown-eyed goddess next to her. Wait. No. Not a goddess. What the fuck. The brown-eyed girl is what she meant. The weed is obviously getting to her. Obviously.
But Camila may as well be a goddess, with the way the smoke is gravitating towards her, almost like her own haze of heaven, a voice that feels, yes, feels, like you’re walking on rose petals, with violins to guide your every step. And her eyes. God, those eyes. She’s sure Camila’s parents were some sort of jewel thieves in their past lives, clad in black bodysuits and ski-masks, stealing sunshine, diamonds, gold, anything ethereal, just to reach this point where Camila’s eyes are somewhat like a night sky that's reflecting everything good in this world. She’s sure Sinu let out one of those evil laughs they always show in cartoons, one with her fingers forming a pyramid and her lips turning into a devilish triangle when they saw Camila’s eyes for the first time. Lauren feels pride engulf her, after all, she’s just discovered the mystery behind Camila’s eyes. Bing-fucking-o.
But she wouldn’t dare voice it out loud. No fucking way. What if they like, have a lair or something? The Cabeyo Dungeon. She shakes herself out of the idea, instead, addressing the girl next to her.
'You wanna try?’
Camila scrunches her nose up, reflexively pushing away the joint.
'No way.’
'Just being polite,’ she shrugs, closing her eyes and tilting her head back against the couch, 'Why didn’t you go with the girls?’
She waits for a reply, and when she doesn’t hear one, she completely forgets that she even asked a question. Instead, she finds herself floating through the music notes ringing through the air, and then there’s a moment.
Man I’m so high, I think I love you
Her eyes shoot up at the words, they hit a little close to home. Okay, maybe a lot. Goddamn. The weed was supposed to pull her away from the edge, not fucking drop her on a tightrope.
She turns her body sideways, discretely, helplessly, stupidly forgetting her manners and staring at Camila like she’s a piece of art. Scratch that. She is a piece of art, Lauren decides.
She bets Camila tastes soft. Maybe like strawberries; just the right balance of sweet and sour. Sour in the sense of sexy, by the way. Camila would never so hurt a fly, let alone hurt a human’s feeling. What if someone isn’t human though? Is Lauren even human?
She shakes her head, putting herself back in the present where her head-shaking has drawn Camila’s attention, her brown-eyes now amused and reflecting mirth.
'Hi.’ Lauren says stupidly.
She gets Camila’s reply in the wave of a laugh, and goddamn, it feels like falling in love. And Lauren really thinks she is. She’s falling in love. Isn’t it meant to be like, a big deal? Fireworks? Earthquakes? An angel descending from heaven just to say, hey motherfucker, you’re in love! Surprise!
It doesn’t feel like that, it’s just… silent. It’s just Camila, sun-kissed and warm-eyed, the softest smile playing on her lips.
It’s just Camila replaying in her mind. Camila’s voice that’s melodic… melodious? Cool, Camila’s voice that’s cool. Camila’s fingers turning pages of her book with the softest touch, like the story would fall frail if Camila showed even the slightest bit of haste. Camila’s laugh that crawls along the length of Lauren’s spine, something both warm and electrifying about it. Camila talking about changing the world, making everyone she meets feel important, feel loved. Camila cuddling Sofia, her protectiveness blatantly there for everyone to see. Camila who watches her parents with pride, dying to feel a love like theirs, even if just for a moment. Camila’s lips curling slightly when she says something so unlike Camila, something like wanting to make out in a bathroom stall in a dizzy party one day. Camila who holds the invisible strings tied to Lauren’s limbs, playing her, unknowingly, to whatever tune she wants.
It’s just… it's just Camila. So why is it Lauren can feel herself falling in love.
'Yeah, you are.’
Lauren blinks. Camila can read minds? Is that, oh my god. What if Sinu and Alejandro aren’t just jewel thieves?! What if they’re jewel thieves with super-fucking- powers?!
Woah.
'I’m what?’
Camila giggles again, her warm hand finding its place on Lauren’s arm, and Lauren can feel the skin there degenerate and turn into something magical. Maybe like the freckles of a fireplace, except it doesn’t hurt.
'You’re high.’
'Oh.’ she looks down at her joint, and she wants to tell Camila she isn’t. Not really. It’s just, Camila looks so fucking gorgeous and it’s making Lauren hazy. That's just what it is.
'Camz.’ there’s this science thing called hypoxia; when you have like, a really damaging loss of oxygen in your brain, and you like… die. Mentally, before physically though. It’s like a high, and you just don’t feel anymore.
Partner that with the good ol’ weed in Lauren’s lungs, and bam. You find this:
'Have you ever wanted to kiss yourself?’
Another laugh.
'Urm no? Have you wanted to kiss yourself?’
'No, how can you even do that?’
'You just ask-’
'I’ve wanted to kiss you. How can you not want to kiss yourself?’
Camila realises Lauren’s reached an oblivion state, because why else would she suddenly credit all those Camren theories and admit to wanting to kiss Camila? And whilst Camila’s eyebrows are drawn together, contemplation playing on her lips, Lauren has, in fact, reached an oblivion, but it’s not just the high. The high is just her crutches, her feelings for the brown-haired girl are her legs, doing the real work. Cut 'em some slack for not being able to coherently confess their feelings.
'Laur, what are you saying?’
There’s like, a zero-point-one part of Lauren that wants to ask the same question, but ninety-nine-point-nine part of her barely realises she’s actually even saying anything. Her words must be numb in her mouth.
'That I want to kiss you. Like, all the fucking time. On stage, in dressing rooms, in the back of this stale tou-’
'You’re so fucking high, stop.’
'No, I told you I’m Lo.’
'Lauren.’
'Lo.’ Lauren mumbles to herself.
'This isn’t funny.’
Lauren looks around at that, not hearing anyone laughing in the first place.
'Who’s laughing?’ she turns back to Camila, her thick eyebrows curled closer in confusion.
'I’m not doing this with you like this, take a fucking nap or something. Fuck.’
If Lauren was a puppy, which contrary to popular belief, she is, you could literally see her ears perk up at the mention of a nap, and you don’t need to tell her twice to catch some sleep.
'Okay, I’ll kiss you later.’
She misses Camila’s mumbled damn right your ass will, too busy falling fast asleep like a child.
***
Fuck. Lauren wakes up under the scrutiny of a streetlamp, her hand slightly clutching her head. She squints her eyes at the offending, barely there, light, silently directing profanities at it.
'Hello?’ she calls out, stumbling a little and taking each step carefully. She hopes there’s at least one person she can dramatize her headache to, hoping to get tons of sympathy in return.
'Anyo- fuck!' she lets out a shriek, not expecting to bump into Camila.
'Ouch! Watch where you’re going!’ Camila seethes from the floor, eyes burning through Lauren.
'I was!’
'You were looking over your shoulder Lauren, that’s not watching where you’re going.’
'I thought Dinah was going to sneak up on me,’ she refutes childishly, lips slightly pouting, 'Where is she anyway?’
'They sent a text saying they’re headed over to visit some of Ally’s friends.’ Camila’s now dusting her pants, and Lauren almost offers to brush her ass for her. Almost.
'Oh.’ is all that gets out from her lips, eyes widely trained on the stubborn butt that’s been taunting her for god knows how long.
'Why do you look like death? I thought being high and having a nap is like heaven or something?’
'I don’t know.’ She moves to get herself some water, the as-, the after-high making her thirsty.
'Do you, er-, do you remember what we were talking about?’
'Something about your parents being thieves?’ the words are out of her mouth before she can stop them, her body stiff. What if it is true and Camila’s taken out her laser gun aiming straight for Lauren’s head?
'What the fuck Lo?!’
'I guess it’s not that. What were we talking about then?’
'Oh.’ Camila’s tone is somewhat disappointed, tugging at Lauren’s heart so she quickly turns around, ready to dissipate whatever disappointment Camila is feeling.
Lauren stares at the timid girl, and she wonders how someone can go from I can rip your head off to I was a puppy in my past life but the cuteness is still here. She raises her eyebrow, urging Camila for an answer.
'We er, you were urm, you said, er y-you wanted to kiss me.’ She mumbles the last part, and it misses Lauren’s ear.
So, she steps closer, moving her ear closer to Camila’s mouth, asking her to repeat herself. Big mistake.
'You wanted to kiss me.’ she exhales against Lauren’s ear after saying that, like it was the longest run she had ever been a part of.
And it’s like a domino effect, the way her exhale steals away Lauren’s breath, Camila’s breath tickling Lauren’s ear.
'W-what?’ Lauren gulps, wishing Camila had shot her with the hidden laser gun instead.
'You said yo-’
'No, I didn’t.’
'You did, yo-’
Lauren was so close to escaping to the safety of the claustrophobic bathroom, but Camila acts quicker, grabbing Lauren’s arm, successfully trapping Lauren against the wall and herself.
'You don’t get to just walk off. You’re 17 Lauren, act like it.’
And that’s exactly what Lauren doesn't do.
'I am acting like it.’ she gestures with air quotation marks, causing Camila to roll her eyes.
Sighing, Camila loosens her hold, gaze now trained on the floor.
’D-did you mean it?’
Yes.
'Camz, I was high.’ Lauren surprises herself with the confidence in her tone because god knows her words are a whole big fat lie. Apparently, Camila is God.
'Don’t fuck around Laur. T-there has to be some -, I like you and I know you feel something too.’
'I-’
Lauren doesn’t finish her sentence, frankly because, there is no sentence. But there’s no better moment than this to get even the slightest taste of Camila.
So she cups the brunette’s cheeks, leaning closer, just enough to let their lips graze and she feels it. The temperature peeking just a little, both their breaths staggering against the tingling skin of their lips. She doesn’t kiss her though, not yet. She takes her time, basking in the way she can feel Camila’s breathing faltering into an irregular symphony. Camila’s fingers clutch tightly on her shirt, and Lauren can feel just how badly Camila wants this too. She can feel the blood breathing loud in her ears, leaving enough room for her heart to echo the same words. Kiss her.
So, she does. She kisses her and loses herself in the high. Again. It’s intoxicating, being able to taste the lips she’s spent forever dreaming of, and she’s more than willing to let herself go.
Flipping the two over, Lauren now has Camila between herself and the wall, and she takes the opportunity to press against Camila completely, moving her lips along the length of Camila’s neck.
God, she’s fucking hungry. She grazes her teeth against the soft skin, and when she feels Camila tilting her neck, she bites, eager for more when she hears Camila inhaling sharply.
'Laur.’ Camila breathes out, her fingers losing themselves in Lauren’s hair.
Fuck. She's starving now.
***
In hindsight, she knows that she knew better; but isn’t that the case always? Who can resist an impulse that’s been culturing for so long? Not Lauren, that's for sure.
It’s been a week since Lauren allowed herself to not care for once, and now, she doesn’t care at all. And that’s how she finds herself being straddled by the brown-haired girl who’s been driving her insane, with the dressing room door locked. Because that’s not suspicious or anything.
Her lips are currently attached to the same neck that she swears she’s not addicted to, hands alternating between squeezing or rubbing the same ass she had only dreamt of touching. She’s pretty sure her ear is about to combust up into flames, with the way Camila is tugging on it with her teeth, letting out profanities and moans and Lauren’s name in between breaths.
Lauren carefully caresses Camila’s hair away from her shoulder, tugging her buttoned shirt away before attaching her lips to the soft skin that’s demanding her attention. God, she’s so soft. Before she can explore any further, a knock pulls them both out of their daze, and whilst Camila buttons her shirt back up, lips swollen and hair messy, Lauren can’t help but kiss her again before moving to get the door.
***
Coffee. That’s all Lauren can think of, walking into the kitchen of their shared apartment. She notices the smell of fresh coffee, her eyebrows furrowing because there’s no way any of her bandmates were up at this ungodly hour. But that thought quickly dissipates when she hears the strumming of a guitar, followed by a voice. A voice that she would definitely trade coffee for. But like, there’s no actual need to sacrifice her coffee, so she pours herself a cup before joining the girl haunting her dreams.
She’s careful not to disturb the brunette, so she opts for leaning against the door frame, hands wrapped around her mug and breath stumbling at the sight of Camila so early in the morning.
She inhales deeply, feeling something perfect about this moment; the fresh coffee, the guitar that hums around the songs of the morning birds, and Camila. Her Camila. Her eyes rake over her bandmate, heart skipping at the sight of her 1975 tank top. She’s dressed casual, her hair haphazardly tossed over to one side, but god is she a sight for sore eyes. So effortless and beautiful.
and i'll stop kissing your mouth like friends do,
Camila ends her song, closing her eyes and it only now registers what she was singing in the first place. Friends? There’s no way she can be just friends with Camila.
Not with the way she just wants to kiss Camila the minute she wakes up, or the way she wants Camila to be the last thing she feels right before she falls asleep. Not with the way her hands have found their home in Camila’s skin, every lamp inside of her lighting up at the way Camila responds to her touch.
Nah. Definitely not just friends.
Determined, she walks over to the bench, coffee long forgotten on the floor.
Resting her hands on both armrests, she leans down, feeling her heart miss a beat at the little constellations on Camila’s nose.
'Whatcha doing Camz?’
'O-oh I was just-’ Camila’s cheeks have turned rosy and Lauren can’t help but smile at how cute she looks.
But she’s in no mood to tease the girl, not right now anyway. Instead, she lifts Camila’s chin up, before pressing her lips against the coffee-flavoured lips she’s grown to love.
'I-I couldn’t sleep.’
'Good.’
Lauren kisses her again, enjoying the way Camila is now leaning up into her, chest out and head tilted up like she can’t get enough of Lauren. And Lauren’s glad for that because Lauren most definitely cannot get enough of the Cuban.
'I can’t look at you quite like friends do.’ Lauren echoes Camila’s song against her lips, and when she gets Camila’s smile on her lips, she knows the brown-eyed goddess gets it.
a/n: i couldn’t figure out whether i wanted this as angst or not but then anobrain made me want to get high so this happened :)) (spoiler alert i didn’t get high x)
my wattpad if you wanna: missing_jauregui
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if | myg
letter #1 | letter #2 | letter #3
listen to: the 1975 - anobrain / please be naked
wc: 2k
a/n: warnings are absent in order to not spoil, but it’s heavy angst. if you need them, just message me and i’ll happily let you know. pay close attention to the formatting as to not be confused <3
Maybe it's just him, but the winds seem a bit warmer today.
The air is fresh and inviting as Yoongi steps outside his apartment. It's not something he does more often than he needs, but today is a special day. It's your birthday, and he wouldn't miss it for the world, despite his heavy heart.
He takes his time on his walk to the train station. It's not all that crowded for a Tuesday afternoon. He supposes that the typical throngs of people who would usually be here have come and gone already, much earlier than him.
The world he sees through the train window isn't awful. He knows you would berate him for being so pessimistic, but you haven't been there to remind him of that in a while.
"Dear Y/N,
Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one who remembers you."
Your laugh is Yoongi's favorite sound, he decides. It's versatile and comes in so many forms yet every single one manages to light up his heart in a way no one else's can. The shy ones when he compliments you, the hearty ones when he fumbles over his words and accidentally creates a new language, the laughs in between syllables as you call him a motherfucker after making a joke at your expense.
It's music to his ears, much more so than the bass-heavy songs pumping from the house party across the street. He didn't really want to come in the first place, but the smile on your face when he agreed was priceless. Saying no would be a serious, inhumane offense he'd never be able to forgive himself for.
"I know it's been a while, but it just feels so strange to me how people can move on with their lives so easily. I think maybe they just never suffered a loss as great as you. Because as lovely and wonderful as you are to have around, it hurts so much more when you leave.
Will there ever come a day that I don't cry when I think about you? As much as it hurts, I hope never do, because that will mean that I've moved on."
As he gets closer to home, the sun peeks out further and further from behind the clouds. Sooner than later, he is passing through the town. If he reaches deep into his memories, he can picture you standing on every street corner and every crosswalk and every doorstep he passes.
"At the very least, there is a place that remembers our love, even if it wasn't explicit. The train tracks behind your house, the playground of my old school, the convenience store in the corner of town we always snuck out to together. The people that walk there now have no clue about you or me or us, but the footsteps are embedded in the concrete, even if just barely, as proof. Traces of you linger there."
He helps you out of the car, balancing you on your heels in the grass, before taking your hand in his and pulling you across the pavement. His hair bounces as he looks from side to side every step of the way to be extra careful.
Inside, he weaves through the crowd with you. It's only a slight disappointment when you tug him back to say hi to almost every person you see. All he can give them is a timid wave, but it's alright because you make up for his silence with everything you have to say. You're practically bursting at the seams with eager words at every instance - the two of you balance each other well.
"I'm doing okay now. I moved because I felt suffocated back home after what happened. It doesn't mean I've forgotten you - I hope you understand. I could never."
When Yoongi's friends find him, slinging their arms around his shoulders half-drunk, you take your cue to leave. You shoot him a look that says something along the lines of, "you'll be okay?" and he offers a minuscule nod that responds, "always am."
He spends the night with the guys while he wishes he was spending it with you. Sure, you could compare the two and accurately say that you get just as rowdy as they do when drunk, but Yoongi thinks you're much more fun to be around. Things being what they are, he has been preferring your presence over anyone else's recently.
He could name detail after detail that he likes about you and wouldn't reach the bottom of the list in a million years. As to not embarrass you, though, he won't.
Regardless, he tries to enjoy himself. He catches your eyes every so often but keeps his distance out of fear of smothering you, entirely unaware that it's not something you would mind.
What bothers him, though, is when your friends start to egg you on in talking to some hotshot baseball player. Not one to be the jealous type, but it's a different story when it comes to you. And to baseball players. He stands in the kitchen, glancing over the rim of his red solo cup, while you push them off and beg them to stop bringing attention to your corner of the living room.
However, drunk girls are overtly supportive and full of encouragement of one another, so of course you end up talking to him. When his cup starts to cave in under his fierce grip, he knows it's time for him to exit the scene. He hits the bathroom upstairs to cool down.
"It's lonely without you with me. I always imagined that we would be together when we went to college and moved to the city and got married and that one day, we'd be neighbors and our kids would end up being friends. That is, if we didn't have them together.
And honestly, maybe we could have. We'll never know for sure, but I have a feeling."
It's only a minute after he shuts himself in does he open it up to your knocking.
"Hey, what's wrong?"
He shrugs. "Nothing, why?"
Your eyes narrow at him skeptically. "I don't know. I just saw you leave really quick." You hop up onto the bathroom counter and Yoongi leans his hip against it to face you.
To be honest, he's a little drunk. He didn't mean to as he intended on driving home, but he got a little caught up without you there to manage him. Therefore, his world is moving a little slow. Not too much to be incomprehensible, but enough that he has to take a second to buffer.
He takes up an interest in the sink between you and him, leaning back on his hands.
"Is it about the guy downstairs?" you ask, holding back a cheeky smile. "My friends were just being annoying. All I did was say hi to make them happy."
Yoongi wants to say that it wasn't about that, wants to deny your assumption that he was jealous, wants to dismiss there being anything between the both of you that would make him feel that way in the first place. He doesn't, though, because you're right, despite how nervous it makes him that you've figured out as much.
"As one of your favorite quotes proclaims, love transcends time and space. I think it also transcends existence. Because wherever you may be, or where I may be, I love you still."
But then it hits him that you've not only figured it out, but you've just now acknowledged it. And it didn't seem like you were upset.
"I never told you, but I think you already knew."
Before he can point it out, you're leaning in to kiss him. One of your hands slides up to the nape of his neck, gentle fingers carding through his hair, and the other rests lightly on his collarbone. It's soft and sweet. Fruit punch lingers on your lips, and he only realizes he's supposed to be reciprocating when you break apart from him.
"Um, I-," you sputter, shaking your head. It starts to feel like a mistake, like you were too bold, but then Yoongi goes into full gear again, hands on your waist pulling you back in. This time it's your turn to be stunned, but it fades much quicker.
A fit of excitement bubbles out of you in the form of a laugh, and Yoongi savors every second. It feels like his dreams are coming true. There's not a doubt in his mind that you like him back now. everything he's been overthinking for the past year was real, after all.
If only he confessed sooner.
"We were us."
He sighs, falling into step across the barren grass. Unfortunately, he knows this path far too well. His body gets him to where he needs to be while his mind wanders.
"And it was so special to feel."
You both agree it's time to leave and the roles have reversed as you now lead him through the crowd. He holds tight to your hand and is even hesitant to let go when you have to push him into the passenger seat and go around to the other side.
You'd driven his car more than once, and considering you were basically sober at this point, it was a no brainer. Deciding you want a little more time before parting ways, you take the backroads, twisting and winding between the trees, so thick that you can't see what lies on the other side of the turn.
"From the moment we're born, we're destined to die. I know that. That's how it is for everyone. The one thing you can be sure of in life is death. The form you might not know, but you are guaranteed it's coming. The day I expected it most, you lived. The day I expected it the least, you didn't.
But sometimes I wonder if I could have done anything. Looking back, I knew what you were doing. I wish I knew what you were thinking. sometimes, I think I already know."
A bright light flashes from around the bend all too quickly.
You always saw three steps ahead, didn't you? It's that sixth sense. I think you resigned yourself to what was going to happen before I even had a clue. Maybe you saw it being me and it ruined you. Maybe you saw it being you, and despite the fear, there was purpose. You talked about not having it so often, but here it was. So confidently, purpose."
There's the drawn-out bellow of a horn and your arm flies out in front of Yoongi's chest. There's not enough time to break.
"Is that moral obligation? Is that destiny? A finite human making a split decision?"
He reaches over to grab the wheel, but you've already committed, hard swerving to the right. He hears himself yell, and then glass is shattering and tires are screeching as your side of the car takes the brunt of the crash.
"Or is it you loving me?"
His feet stand still at the base of your grave. With delicate hands, he nestles the bundle of envelopes between the lillies he's brought for you.
He knows you won't be able to read them. A part of him, however, hopes that maybe you were reading it all over his shoulder when he wrote it. Maybe you can feel it. Maybe you can hear it when he says it in his mind. You were able to when you were alive, so why couldn't you do the same now?
It's been years, but each memory of you is vivid in his mind. How could it not be, when every good thing he sees reminds him of you? When he relives that moment every day?
"If I could go back in time to save you, I would.
But then again,
would you let me?"
#yoongi angst#yoongi drabble#yoongi imagine#yoongi x reader#yoongi fanfic#yoongi scenario#bts angst#bts drabble#bts imagine#bts x reader#bts fanfic#yoondoze
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Drunk | Part 3 |
Description of Part 1: Matty Healy x Reader (Female) | When you come back home to Manchester from University, you get invited to a house party filled with your old friends from high school. You hadn’t seen most of them for 4 years and the house brings back some old memories of the parties you once attended. Getting drunk with old friends ends up being better than you imagined.
Word Count: 9k
A/N: So I found it so difficult to write this part which is one of the many reasons why it took so long to share with you guys. So I really hope you all enjoy it and your reactions and feedback are most welcome. I honestly love seeing your comments. Love you all and thanks a million for reading. It means more than you know. Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist x
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| MASTERLIST IN BIO |
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Before you knew it, Christmas was upon you and your life seemed relatively good compared to the last time you came back home for Christmas. You’d always loved coming back to see everyone and this year was even better because you’d reconnected with so many people.
It made this Christmas one of the best you’d had in a long while.
Your last Christmas break had been boring compared to this one. Last year you were just lazy and sat around your house watching anything on Netflix.
You’d spice it up from time to time by going between Caroline, Alisha, and Y/B/F’s houses and had a few drinks with them every now and again. You did just go around to be with your best friends though as you really did miss them when you were back in Leeds.
This year though, was completely different. You were out of the house every other day going into town or going to see various people you’d lost contact with. And you’d also met up with your old friends a few times too.
On more than one occasion you’d met up with George and he showed you his studio, where him and the boys made and recorded their videos. And you’d also been seeing Matty.
Well, not really seeing him. You met up with each other. Both played hard to get for an hour or two before one of you gave in first. You shagged and then you went your separate ways. Until the next time.
It was a mutually beneficial relationship between the two of you. You both craved each other, and you got what you wanted.
You never thought it would turn into a full ‘friends with benefits’ situation, but it did. And you didn’t mind.
On the occasion that George brought you to their studio, it was just you and George for a while. You’d gone around because you’d been interested in their music as you hadn’t seen them perform yet and were eager to hear it their new stuff too.
You’d also told George how you were interested to see how they recorded their songs, so he’d invited you around to show you.
You’d been at the studio for 4 hours before the other boys joined you. You didn’t even know they were coming until they all crashed in and startled you.
You noticed that George didn’t even seem fazed when they slammed the door open and practically fell over each other as they came in. You, however, had the fright of your life and almost jumped out of your skin.
You watched as they all laughed coming into the room and Adam and Ross composed themselves when they saw you. Matty, however, didn’t give a fuck and carried on cackling away.
Despite making eye contact with you, Matty walked past you, ignoring your existence and stood next to George. It seemed the playing hard to get was starting early today.
You turned your attention back to Ross and Adam and asked how they were.
Adam nodded with an adorable smile on his face and Ross asked, “Good thanks, are you alright?”
“Yeah I’m good thanks. I’ve just been listening to your stuff” You tell him turning back toward the computer screen that you and George were sat at.
You noticed that Matty had moved away from George and now headed toward the sofas on the opposite side of the room.
“Which ones?” Adam questions and you smiled up at him.
You looked to George for confirmation for the names as you said them out loud, “I’ve listened to Facedown, Woman, Anobrain, and Sex”
George grinned and nodded before you turned back to the other boys, who were now all sat on the sofa’s opposite the wall full of pictures. You smiled at Ross and Adam hoping to make it clear that you really did like their music.
“Which ones your favourite?” Adam smiled and you thought about it for a few seconds.
“I don’t know, I like Woman but I also really like Sex” You tell him truthfully.
Before you could say anymore, George interrupted saying “We know”
That made you all laugh. You elbowed him in his side and chuckled along.
You weren’t fussed that Matty had told them, they had probably heard a lot over the years, so you were nothing new to them. You looked at Matty and smiled and he shrugged his shoulders at you.
“Well yeah but anyway...” You move the conversation quickly on.
“I really like your music” You told them, and they all murmured a thank you.
Your night moved on and you ended up ordering a takeout with them. You all listened to some music as you ate, and you found that you bounced off them quite well when it was just you 5.
It never became awkward which you were thankful for. Each of you kept the conversation flowing and before you knew it, hours had passed.
You’d forgotten how nice it was to just have lads as friends. There was no drama or over analysing like there was with girls.
You were laughing and chatting so loudly with them that you’d almost missed your phone ringing.
It was your Mum, so you quickly picked up the phone.
“Hey” You answered.
Her voice rang loudly in your ear as she asked, “Hi, are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m good thanks, are you alright?” You respond, trying to sound just as friendly as she was being, despite wanting to chat with your friends again.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just wondered if you needed any tea doing or if you were having something out?” She asked you.
“I’ve just had a takeout, but thanks though” You told her.
“That’s fine, what did you have?” She asked and she carried on asking you all the things Mum’s did on the phone.
The boys thankfully stayed relatively quiet as you spoke to her, which surprised you actually. You half expected one of them to shout ‘Y/N but that cig out’ like everyone used to in high school.
“Are you coming home tonight or are you staying out again?” She asked you.
“Am I staying out or coming home...” You slowly repeated out loud, as if in thought. But you were actually looking for confirmation from Matty.
When his eyes connected with yours you immediately knew the answer. From the way he acted all night you could just tell at this point.
You watched as he mouthed, “Stay mine” and you returned to your conversation as the other boys started grinning at you both.
This caused you to have a smile on your face when you told your Mum, “I’m gunna stay out I think”
“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow then” She said, and you were surprised she didn’t make a big deal about it.
Usually when you stayed out more than twice a week, she would guilt trip you into spending more time with her. She probably just thought you were staying at Y/B/F’s again.
“Yep I’ll see you tomorrow. Love you” You bid her goodbye.
“Love you too, bye” She repeated.
“Byeeee” You dragged before hanging up the phone.
You looked back to the guys and they were all looking at you with a grin.
“Who was that?” George cooed.
“My boyfriend” You joke but keep a completely serious face.
You watched as their faces dropped. Except for Matty’s, he didn’t seem to care.
The room went silent for a moment until you let your smile slip and you couldn’t stop the laugh that escaped your lips.
You saw relief flood onto the others faces and they shook their heads at you. Most likely because you actually tricked them.
“Can you imagine? ‘Oh hey, yeah imma stay out tonight and sit on someone else’s dick. Bye love you’... Jesus guys, I’m not him” You laughed, pointing towards Matty.
They did start laughing at that and you smiled when Matty flashed you his middle finger.
“No, it was my Mum” You told them.
“Awh, what does our Y/M/N think about you shagging him?” Ross pries, nodding towards Matty.
Ross had met your Mum a few times in the past at various school events you were both forced to go to. So, Ross knew her somewhat better than the rest.
You let out a small laugh at that, “Oh, she definitely doesn’t know about that”
You’d managed to bring Matty back to yours whilst she was out for the night and you were left on your own. You didn’t need the embarrassing conversation that followed it when she would inevitably see him the following morning.
“Really?” George questions.
You looked at him and explain, “George, she probably still thinks I’m an innocent virgin”
This comment then caused Matty to let out a loud laugh. You couldn’t help your laughter too because it was probably near enough the truth.
“She couldn’t be more wrong then, could she?” Matty smirked.
You shook your head, grinning, “No, not really”
You couldn’t even lie about it. You literally admitted to everyone at Steve’s party that you liked to be choked. To make it worst you and Matty had got up to some kinky shit that the other boys probably already knew about.
You didn’t find anything to be ashamed of though. If Matty wasn’t bothered, you definitely weren’t. Especially when Matty was the one who suggested you try out more stuff in the first place.
The night carried on and George got you all a beer, except for the designated driver, Ross. You didn’t particularly like the taste of beer, but you drank it anyway. If you could stomach straight vodka, you could definitely stomach lager.
Before you knew it, George exclaimed, “How the fuck is it half one?”
You took your phone out just to double check and it was indeed 01:30am. You couldn’t believe it, you met up with George at 3pm. The day had practically flashed in front of your eyes.
“Better get going” Ross announces, getting himself up off the sofa and he offers to the surrounding boys, “Want a lift?”
“Nah I think I’m good mate, but thanks though” George says sarcastically, and you let out a chuckle.
Both Matty and Adam also stood up indicating to you that they were accepting Ross’ generous offer. You stay sat for a moment longer until Matty stood in front of you when you were about to get up.
Matty offered both his hands to you and you happily took them. You let him pull you up to your feet and you share a smile before you let go of each other’s hands.
“Always a pleasure George” You say, going to wrap your arms around his torso. He happily accepted the hug and gave you a tight squeeze in return.
“I’m glad you found the recording interesting” He smiled, and you honestly did.
“Honestly loved it. You’re all very clever” You grin, looking round the boys. “Don’t forgot me when you’re massive popstars”
“It’ll be rockstars actually” Matty said and you rolled your eyes.
“Same difference. Just don’t forget who supported you when you were sat in your make shift studio recording your music” You say pointing between them all.
“Woah, did you just insult the studio?” George piped up and you back tracked immediately.
He laughed as he showed you all out. Just as you were about to get into the back of Ross’ car you wave, “See you on Saturday at the gig”
And you did.
After George’s that night, you went back to Matty’s and you both had a wild ride. You both got up to some kinky shit that you had no doubt Matty would tell the other boys first chance he got. And you’d probably had the best sex of your life.
You were really surprised that you hadn’t woken his Mum or his brother up that night. You tried your best to keep quiet but Matty liked to try make you louder. Either way you’d had a great night.
The next time you saw Matty was at the gig on the Saturday night. 4 days had passed since you’d last had sex, so you prepared yourself for the inevitable to take place and you dressed to impress. But you wouldn’t admit that.
Matty seemed thrilled to see you when you showed up at the bar in your leather skirt and lacey body suit. You watched as his eyes ran over your body and you liked that he immediately came over to you, cutting off his conversation with a different girl you deemed prettier than yourself.
He came to your side and his hand found its way to your hip as you ordered your drink.
“You alright?” Matty asked you.
You could see him trying to look into your eyes but failing. They were looking at anything but.
“Great thanks” You smiled at him before turning back to the bartender and diverted your attention from Matty.
You didn’t want to make it easy for Matty. You wanted him to work for it.
When you got your drink Matty was still on you, not that you were complaining, and he was leading you to his table where the other boys were. They all said ‘hey’ and at that point you expected Matty to leave you be, but you were wrong.
When you removed your leather jacket, his arm immediately found its way around your shoulder and he kept himself close to you. You found it quite odd considering that the other guys that you hung around with back at Leeds didn’t even do this when they were after sex. But you liked the game playing.
It got better when Matty didn’t have a drink in his other hand too. At the start of the night his hand rested on your knee, but as you both consumed more alcohol you found his hand creeping higher and higher, until his fingers were almost under your leather skirt.
You’d sent him knowing glances as his grip would randomly tighten on your leg or he would risk it by moving slightly higher. You loved that he was being adventurous out in public too.
To make it worse he knew he was affecting you. Especially when he trailed his fingertips up and down your leg. That had become a tell of Matty’s because he always did it when you were in bed and was after another shag.
It had become second nature to you now. After almost a month of his constant attention you knew what he wanted and when he wanted it. That didn’t stop you from making him wait for it though.
You liked that he was testing the boundaries more with you and acting slightly cockier than he usually was.
The sexual tension between the two of you could practically be seen and George had to almost drag Matty away from you when it was time for them to go up on stage. But then it was your turn to sit waiting for him to give you what you wanted.
You found him incredibly attractive when he was up on stage performing. You had when you were younger, and you still did now. Only it was harder for you to control yourself than you remembered.
You forgot that Matty probably used his performances to his advantage and he probably seduced most of his victims through his stage presence. You were certainly finding it difficult to sit still whilst he kept making innuendos and thrusting his hips into the crowd. Specifically, in your direction.
At one point you wanted to go up and get him from the stage and let him have you in the back room of the pub. There was just something about him when he performed.
You didn’t know whether it was the 0 fucks that he gave whilst he was up there or the fact that he seemed to have you hanging onto his every word. You barely found it in yourself to listen to their songs because you were just so focused on him.
You did note that his singing was much better than it was all those years back but that was to be expected. They were a really good band and you really hoped everything worked out with the interest from the record label.
You also liked the fact that he kept winking at you and nodding towards you when he made eye contact with you. You found yourself blushing at one point when he didn’t break eye contact from you whilst singing a dirty lyric which you liked that he did.
You could see on stage that he was getting progressively more drunk and you just knew that by the time he’d finished and packed away the gear he’d be on you in a flash. And there was nothing more you’d wanted the whole night than to sit on his dick.
That was all you could think about for the last 10 minutes of the gig. Especially when he started singing Sex. The lyric ‘If we’re gunna do anything we might as well just fuck’ just make the wait for him more agonising.
You wanted him so much you were probably willing to beg for it.
Thankfully Matty seemed to be on entirely the same page. As soon as he’d finished singing Sex to close the show, he came off the stage as people were applauding him, walked up to you, and kissed you.
It was a hot kiss and you could feel it again spark the sexual tension between the two of you. You both wanted each other so much it was almost unbearable when he broke away.
He left you horny and dizzy before he left to go back and pack up their equipment. After you composed yourself from the sudden attack to your lips you turned to your best friend.
She didn’t even seem fazed by it this time, she just had a grin on her lips. You were originally meant to stay at hers, but you knew that there was no way that was happening now.
You had needs and so did Matty.
You hated when he left you hot and bothered and waiting for more. It made you irritable and all you could think about was his hands on your body and all the things he did with them.
20 minutes after their set ended, Matty walked toward you with his guitar case in one hand and pulled you up from your seat with the other.
You hadn’t seen any of the other boys before Matty pulled you outside. He put his guitar case down on the ground before pushing you up against the brick wall and reattached his lips to yours.
He tasted like alcohol and that didn’t really surprise you. You had seen him drink so much it didn’t surprise you that it was all you could taste.
He smelled like the expensive aftershave he always wore and as you pulled him closer by his leather jacket you really wanted him to take you right against the wall. You found him so addicting in the stupidest of ways.
And to think, after your crush had bypassed, you used to judge every girl that Matty was rumoured to have been with. And now here you were, wanting him to fuck you against a wall.
You remember you used to think, ‘Oh he’s added another one to the list’ and now you seemed to be the last on the list.
For now, anyway.
And you were fine with that.
Matty was sweaty from the gig but that somehow made him more attractive to you. His curls were everywhere from the consistent head banging he’d been doing, and it made him even more desirable.
Maybe it was because that’s what he ended up like after a night in his bedroom and he was always attractive to you there. It could have been that or it could have been the way you could feel how hungry he was for you.
You really didn’t know if you had enough will power to make him wait for you like usual. You liked to toy with him and keep him waiting. Give him the illusion that he was in control but knowing full well that you were the one who decided when it would happen.
But tonight, you didn’t think any waiting would be happening. You were already too far into the game.
Your tongue was in his mouth when you both got interrupted. And much to your disappointment you had to pull away.
“Matty, need your help with the gear mate” George interrupted the both of you.
“I’m a bit busy” Matty almost growled in anger before kissing you again.
You chuckled into the kiss before you pushed him away from you slightly. You didn’t really want him further away from you, because you quite liked the fact he trapped you against the wall and stole kisses.
But you would always look out for George.
“You can help them first, then you’ve got me for the rest of the night” You told him, patting on his chest so he would move away from you.
Matty looked at you with annoyance clear on his features and you found his reaction comical. He could see the humour in your eyes and he now couldn’t wait to make you wait for it later.
You diverted your attention from the annoyed boy in front of you and looked towards George. He nodded, appreciating your help and you smiled back at him before patting Matty’s chest silently instructing him to go help.
When you eventually got back to Matty’s that night, you were on each other like animals. You didn’t leave each other alone for hours and you don’t know how you hadn’t woken someone up with the noises that came from both your mouths.
You couldn’t get enough of each other. When you thought you were both finished, you would be quickly back on each other wasting no time at all. It was like you were both addicted to each other’s bodies.
Each time either of you got a taste of each other it was like a chemical reaction took place that sent you both into a frenzy. You craved each other. You needed each other.
And Matty never disappointed. He drove you wild. He consumed your every sense.
Every touch.
Every thought.
Everything.
You didn’t think it could get better as time went on, but Matty proved you wrong there as well. He kept you keen and he kept things interesting.
You couldn’t help but get excited for the next time that you would see him again to try different things out. You ended up going a little bit 50 shades with each other but neither of you seemed to mind.
If anything, it was the complete opposite. You both looked forward to it. It made things more interesting.
You’d been having that much fun that you found time was flying by. You’d seen Matty at least every other day for a shag or two and afterwards you sometimes hung around with each other.
One-time Matty followed you out shopping which you don’t know why he did because he complained the entire way around. He sounded like a pissed off boyfriend that had been forced to go clothes shopping.
Another time after you stayed at Matty’s for the night, the boys all stumbled into his room before you had a chance to leave. Thankfully you were dressed in a pair of joggers and a hoodie as you got cold during the night.
George jumped across you both as you were still half asleep in bed and you’d ended up spending the rest of the day with them. And you did have fun these various times you would both stick around each other.
You seemed to get on really well and you could sort of see the both of you becoming a thing if you were to stick around. However, you hadn’t gone to university and got yourself thousands of pounds in debt to drop out 4 months before finishing.
You did like Matty though and your crush on him started to resurface. But you were getting the physical stuff out of the way and you knew Matty tended not to waste time with emotion. Which is why a conversation you had after a you’d had sex surprised you a lot.
You were both lay in your bed hot and sweaty from the mischief that you’d both just gotten up to. Both of you were lay silent just catching your breaths.
After a minute or two of you both staring at the ceiling and calming down, Matty questions, “When do you go back?”
“In a week” You tell him slightly breathlessly and slightly disappointed that you could only have sex with him a few more times before you left.
“Shame” Matty sighed.
“Why’s it a shame?” You questioned, whilst turning your head to the side to look at him.
“I’ll have to find someone to replace you with” Matty explains turning to look back at you.
The cheeky grin on his face was adorable.
You smiled at that and let out a small laugh. It didn’t surprise you and you guessed you would be in the same situation when you got back to Leeds.
So, you nodded, “Same”
“Ah well, it’ll be easy” Matty shrugged before looking back at your ceiling.
You jokingly scoff, “Nice to know I’m easily replaceable”
But you can’t keep the smile from your face. You ended up chuckling at your own joke, knowing he really didn’t mean it that way, and Matty ends up laughing too.
“Nah you’re good… It’s definitely been memorable” Matty reminisces truthfully.
“Yeah, you looked good in the fluffy handcuffs” You chuckle, grinning at the memory.
He definitely did you remembered hovering over him and having to stop yourself from talking a picture of him in them. It was a fun sight to see, and one you wanted to see again and again.
“Yeah well, you look great with my hand around you throat” Matty grinned, and you couldn’t stop your reaction.
“Wow, serial killer” You laughed, and he laughed too.
You both couldn’t stop giggling for about a minute until Matty finally calmed down. He’s grinning at you, playing with a lone strand of your hair that had accidentally made it onto his pillow.
“Don’t act like you didn’t enjoy it” Matty chuckles
“Definitely not denying it. You’re probably the only guy that’s done it properly” You tell him truthfully, but Matty looked at you slightly confused.
You decided to clear it up for him and explain, “The rest just pussy out”
Matty had been the only guy you’d been with that actually choked you with just enough pressure to make the sensation even more enjoyable. Everyone else just didn’t seem to do it right. They either just put their hand on your neck or only applied a little bit of pressure.
You demonstrated what you meant on his throat and you felt him gulp beneath your hand.
You smiled down at him, “Want me to do it to you?”
You saw his lip twitch up at the thought of it and you chuckled at him as you squeezed slightly tighter before letting go of him.
“Such a fucking tease” Matty hummed, before grabbing you by your neck and bringing you to him for a long kiss.
You felt him tighten his grip slightly and you couldn’t help but smile as he did it.
“You really enjoy it don’t you?” He questions when you pull away and he lets go of your neck.
As you hovered over him, you nod, “Yeah, I do”
“Well I’ll do it again if you want before you leave? Keep it memorable for you, so you know what you’ll be missing” He grinned at you.
“I’m mean yeah sure but don’t act like you won’t miss me… I know for a fact that you’ve never been tied down to a bed before like we did after George’s” You told him. You remembered the night well. One of the best nights you’d had with him.
“Er yea...” Matty started but you quickly shut him down.
“No, I don’t mean you haven’t done it to anyone else… I mean no one’s ever done it to you.” You said with a smirk and watched as he tried to find a response.
“What makes you say that?” He challenged you with a little frown.
“You clearly hated not being able to have control over me and you were getting angry to me for it. You hated not being able to touch. It killed you” You smiled, because you knew you were right.
Matty looked at you for a moment and you could see him searching his brain for something to say.
You giggled and shuffled slightly closer to him saying, “See, you don’t have a comeback because you know it’s true”
“And I know it’s true because you’ve started to enjoy it more, rather than getting angry and that’s all down to me” You added feeling empowered by his lack of response.
Matty gave you a look that said, ‘You’re right but I hate you for it’. You smiled down at him when he said “Okay, you got me there but-”
“But nothing…” You interrupted before leaning down to kiss his lips a few times.
“I’m the best and you know it” You smirked down at him, a victorious grin on your face.
“How are you the best if I’ve only experienced you doing it?” He asked, trying to knock you off your high horse.
“Guess we’ll have to wait and see. You can tell me when I’m back after I graduate” You raised your eyebrows at him playfully.
“Wait, you’re coming back here after you graduate?” Matty asked and you nod.
“Yeah I can’t really stay over there. I will have no loan to pay for accommodation and I don’t earn enough at the bar to keep myself going” You tell him honestly.
“We can pick up right where we left off then” Matty grins, and you would love nothing more.
You just knew it wouldn’t happen just like that though.
You joke, “You mean after you’ve shagged the other half of Manchester?”
Matty let out a loud laugh at your comment, followed with, “Wow, you know me so well”
You chuckled before bringing your lips down to his again. You wasted no time and climbed back over his body and started making out with him again.
Your little arrangement continued on until the end of the week and you really wished that you didn’t have to go back.
Getting dick was so much easier when it was just one person you needed to ask for it. Going out and finding others was just too stressful sometimes.
You were thankful that when you came home you could have him. And you were thankful for the time you’d had with him. Because he was fucking good.
After your little speech about control over him, Matty certainly made it clear that he was the dominant party and you were the submissive. He tied you down so tight that you almost thought you would get bruises.
Everything about him exhilarated you. The way he acted like he didn’t care but his actions towards you were so possessive that you knew he did.
You hadn’t even gotten to know him that well since you’d been fucking. You just knew the basics of him. Band. Drugs. Food. Money. Sex. You didn’t want to know anything else because you’d become too attached.
You literally just craved each other’s bodies and you liked that he was begging for it from you sometimes.
Like one time he was driving you back home and you both just couldn’t wait. He pulled the car over and you very quickly got onto his dick and had the most amazing car sex.
He really was incredible, and you found yourself wanting to see him more and more. Like if a day went by and neither of you called each other up you just knew you were going to get the most out of what was to come the next day.
The fact that you both seemed to get on with each other and enjoyed each other’s company even when you weren’t having sex, made Matty’s actions towards you worse. It sort of upset you because after the past two months, you would consider yourself at the very least friends with him, despite only knowing him on a physical level.
So when he didn’t show up to say bye, it hurt more than you let on. You understood that at the end of the day it was just a friends with benefits situation and that he had no commitments to you.
But you’d been fucking him for two months. You thought that the least he would do is show up to say bye after promising he would. That and you’d obviously let yourself become too attached.
You’d arranged a small get together at your house for the people you were going to miss. The people who you didn’t want to lose contact with again and of course Matty and the band were invited.
You’d spent so much time with the boys over the past two months that there was no way you wouldn’t miss their company.
And especially Matty’s. But after promising he’d show up and not doing just highlighted the fact that he didn’t care at all and never did.
When George, Adam and Ross showed up to your house you’d been so excited to see them that for 30 seconds you didn’t even realise Matty wasn’t with them.
However, when you questioned where he was, George noticed that your face immediately changed and so did your mood when he reluctantly told you Matty wasn’t coming.
You did try and put it past you to not let it ruin your night. But George noted that it hurt your feelings, even if it was only a little bit.
What made it worse was that even Steve showed after you’d pied him off all those weeks ago. But the guy you’d been fucking for two months was nowhere in sight.
You don’t know why you expected anything different. After all he was the fuckboy of your friendship group. You just thought because it was a mutually beneficial situation, and the fact that you’d actually considered each other friends, he would come and say bye.
Despite Matty being in the back of your mind all night, you did have a good night. And you hated yourself that you’d booked such an early train back so everyone left slightly earlier than they usually would.
Most parties didn’t end at midnight but this one did because your train back was so early.
The band were the last of your friends to leave as Alisha, Caroline and Y/B/F had to head home slightly earlier than your self-made curfew. You didn’t mind though you’d seen them a lot over the holidays and you knew they had somewhere important to be in the morning.
As the boys left, they each gave you a big hug which was a great feeling. It had been really nice hanging out with them over the past two months and you told them all that and that you’d miss them a lot.
You’d enjoyed getting to know them all again instead of what you saw on Facebook from time to time. They were amazing people and you definitely didn’t want to lose contact again.
George was the last to hug you and you clung to him for a second longer than the others. You really wished you could take George back with you as you had no doubt he’d love Leeds and all the stuff you got up to.
However, it was probably for the best that he stayed because your friends would try their best to eat him up.
You told Matty about their obsession with George when you were lay in bed once. He didn’t believe that they liked him as much as you said they did so you showed him some of the messages.
Matty then joked that if George and Jess ever broke up, he would know exactly where to take him first.
George gave you a tight squeeze before saying, “I’m sorry Y/N”
You frown a little as you look up at him, “What’re you sorry for?”
“I’m sorry I couldn’t get him out, I’ve been texting him all night. He’s being a prick” George explained with a sad smile.
You shook your head and smiled up at him. “It’s fine, you know what he’s like. Shouldn’t have been a surprise really”
“Well, I’m still sorry” George apologises, before hugging you one more time.
You chuckled and hugged him back. You savoured the moment because it was quickly over, and he was on his way out the door.
Unfortunately, the morning came far too quickly and you and before you knew it you were sat on the freezing cold train station platform waiting for your train.
Of course, it was your luck that it was half an hour delayed and it was one of the coldest mornings you’d experienced in a long time. It seemed fitting to your mood though. You didn’t really want to go back.
You were sat on your own with your headphones on trying to drown the world away. You were still tired from the night before and emotionally drained to.
You’d had such a good two months and you don’t even know why you let the fact that Matty didn’t show up bother you. You knew what you were getting yourself in to and you knew what Matty was like, so it really shouldn’t have been a shock.
Thankfully before you could let your mind wonder too far into the subject, your train arrived, and you quickly got on. You found an empty seat and tried to warm up quickly. You hated being cold. It was one of the worst feelings ever so you were thankful that you warmed up quickly.
About halfway through your journey, you received a text message that woke you up from your drowsy state. The notification made you jump up and your heart started beating slightly faster from the fright.
You unlocked your phone and saw that you had a text from Matty. You rolled your eyes as you read the blunt message and decided that it was definitely for the best that you were returning back to reality. What a twat.
You put your phone down, without replying and locked it letting the message fade away to the black screen.
Bye
~*~*~*~*~*~
When you got back to university, Matty very quickly became a distant memory. You had more important things to think about in your final few months than a boy that was just a good fuck.
The only time you thought about him was when he was mentioned when you spoke to George or when your friends joked about him.
Over the two months that you saw him, you didn’t keep him being a good shag a secret from your Uni friends. So, he ended up becoming an inside joke in your flat when your returned, as everyone knew about him.
For example, because you went on about how good the sex was and how often you were receiving it, they could all sense your happy mood when you spoke to them.
Therefore, every time you were in a bad mood at Uni they would say things like, “Aw Y/N, do you need to give Matty a call?” Or, “I’m just gunna go get Matty for you”
You found their banter quite funny and sometimes you played along and when they asked if you were alright, you’d joke, “No but I’ll give Matty a call later on”
You all found the joke quite funny and a few of your slightly less close friends started to quickly understand the joke too. They were all dying to see who he was, but you kept him a secret.
Thankfully, they didn’t know he went under Truman Black on Facebook, so they never found him, and you never told anyone outside your flat that he was in a band.
One night after someone had annoyed you in work you sat down in your flat and told your friends about it. You could feel your anger returning so you made the joke and blatantly said to your friends “I can feel myself getting angry again, should I call Matty now or later?”
This caused your flatmates to laugh and your mood picked up. They distracted you pretty easily, so you never actually did end up calling Matty whilst you were back at uni. Despite wanting to a few times when you were drunk and wanted an easy booty call.
Yes, Leeds was a bit far to travel but you wouldn’t doubt what Matty would do for a shag.
Uni took over your life once more and you were thankful that you’d pretty much got all of your dissertation finished so you could finish Uni without any stress. The first few months back you hadn’t really spoken to anyone from back home other than your close friends.
That made the fact that you received a random message from George at 1am all the more exciting.
Hey Y/N/N hope you’re good. Just wondered if you could possibly sort some gigs out for us at some point in Leeds? No worries if not though :)
You were already up so you decided to reply straight away. You forgot how much you’d missed him until you saw his name pop back up on your screen. You definitely wanted him to come an experience Leeds with you.
You were actually quite excited at the thought of them coming over to your neck of the woods. And you knew you could get them some good gigs. Everyone loved you over here so it would be easy to sort out.
Hey, Yeah of course I will! I think there’s a music festival coming up soon actually and I’ll get you other gigs across the weekend, so you don’t have to come all this way just for the one gig :)
You sent back and his reply was almost immediate.
Absolute legend Y/N!!! knew you’d get us sorted
You chuckled when that came through. God you’d missed how much of a big brother he was to you. You replied to him quickly getting excited at the thought of them coming to Leeds.
Anytime. I’ll go around and ask people about it tomorrow and I’ll get back to you with some details.
And you did do just that. You went out the next day and persuaded the event organiser that it was in his best interest to let the boys headline the music festival on the Saturday evening.
You then went to a bar in town that you knew the manager of and asked them if they would be interested in the entertainment for the Sunday evening. They said yeah and even said they would pay each of them for the gig.
Then you asked your manager at work if the boys could play on the Friday before the festival because it was your music night anyway. He of course said yes because he loved you because you were his favourite employee.
You worked in the student union bar and knew that the people who came in would love the band. You elected to book that full weekend off work because you could see it ending up a messy one.
The boys liked to drink, and you definitely wouldn’t say no if they asked you to drink with them.
You left work and started walking back to your flat eager to tell George about everything. You checked the time and saw that it was 4pm.
You didn’t think it would be a problem if you called him now, so you just rang him. After a few rings you heard him pick up the phone.
“Hello Y/N” George answered in a cheery voice.
“Hello George” You mimicked with a chuckle.
You weaved yourself through the pavement full of students hoping to make it back to your flat quickly. It was quite nice out today, it was no surprise people were out and about.
“Please tell me you’ve got good news for me” George said, and you could hear the hope in his voice.
You chuckled, being unable to hide your humour, “George have I ever let you down?”
“No” He said, and you smiled.
“Your girl just got you three gigs and two of them are paid ones” You walked towards your building and smiled when you saw an old friend hold the door open for you.
You mouthed a ‘thank you’ to her and got inside your building quickly. You were so thankful you only lived 2 minutes from your campus and work. It made life a lot easier.
“Are you joking?” George practically shouted down your ear and you couldn’t help but smile.
“No, I swear down” You laughed.
“Y/N I actually love you. You’re a gem!” He said sounding excited before you heard commotion on the other end of the phone.
You quietly heard George tell who you presumed to be the other boys that you’d got them paid gigs. And before you knew it you were explaining to them what stuff you’d booked them for as you got the lift up to the 5th floor.
You assumed George had put you on speaker because you could hear just about every excited thing the boys said as you told them about it.
“So yeah, I’ve basically got you three gigs at places I know” You started off.
“I’ve got you a gig at my Student Union on the Friday night because it’s a music night and they usually get a band in anyway. They aren’t very good so I’ll make sure you go on after them so everyone can hear the difference between shit and decent music.” You explain and you hear chuckles from the other end of the phone.
“Oh, and because you know me, you’ll get free drinks all night with that one as well as being paid for it which you can thank me for later. On the Saturday you’ve then got the music festival that I’ve...”
“Where are we in the line-up for that Y/N?” You heard Matty asked and you rolled your eyes as you walked into your flat and kicked the door closed.
“Well, if you would have let me speak instead of butting in, I was about to tell you that I got you headlining it” You said, and you paused when you heard their excited commotion.
You could picture them sat around Georges phone in the studio with massive smiles on their faces.
You continued on, “You won’t get paid for that one, but you’ll again get free drinks for it so it’s not too bad” You heard murmurs of how good it should be and that the festival would be great.
“Then on the Sunday I got you a gig at a bar in the town. It’s quite nice in there and you’ll get paid like a hundred for doing it along with drinks again” You said before walking into your lounge/kitchen and plonking yourself down on the sofa.
You waved at Ava and silently said ‘Hello’ to her as she was stood making your flats dinner for the evening. She smiled at you and waved back with a knife in her hand. You smiled at her action.
“Holy shit Y/N you’re the fucking best” You heard Ross call and you smiled.
“Yeah I know… Told you I could be your manager George” You say with a laugh.
You heard George get excited aggravated for a moment, and practically shouted at you down the phone, “You actually could. Why the fuck did you leave us and go to Leeds in the first place? We could’ve used you back here”
“Ah well you wouldn’t be getting free drinks now if I didn’t leave” You said shrugging your shoulders and you couldn’t keep the smile off your face.
God you loved George so much. You really had forgot how much you’d missed him.
“That’s true” You heard Adam point out.
“When is this Y/N?” You think you heard Ross call.
“Oh, well, I was thinking you could come up on the Thursday and we can have catch up drinks or something. And then you can all stay in my flat for the weekend because loads of people won’t be back, so I’ve got the room. And the Thursday would be... the Seventh of April”
You heard a silence down the phone and then a few hushed voices.
“Shit, you’ve already got something planned for that weekend, haven’t you?” You questioned.
“It’s Matty’s birthday on the Eighth” Ross informed you.
“Shit, I can cancel them if you want? I doubt they’ll mind. Or if you want, I can just cancel the one on the Eighth and you can come on the Saturday” You rambled on wanting to sort something out for them.
“Nah nah nah it’s fine. We’ll do them all” Matty told you loudly.
“It’s alright, it really won’t be an issue cancelling them” You said, wanting to make sure.
“Nah, honestly thanks for sorting all of it out. Should be a weekend to remember. As long as we have a hard night out after the gig on the Friday?” Matty suggests and you could practically see the grin on his face.
“That’s fine by me” You said honestly.
They all knew how much you liked a drink.
“Should be good, I’ll bring all my mates out” You said, and Ava started paying attention to you.
Any mention of going out, she was all ears. She loved a good night out.
“You don’t have any friends Y/N” Matty called.
You scoff at his comment, “Ugh, yeah I do actually. The ones that fancy George”
Ava sent you a knowing look, “Drummer George?” and you nodded a quick yeah.
“Oh my god, is he single yet?” Ava shouted, which made you and the boys on the phone laugh.
“No, and you can’t go near him, he’s practically married” You tell her as she comes and sits down next to you.
“Is she fit?” You heard Matty ask.
You rolled your eyes and say, “Fuck off Matty”
At the mere mention of his name your friend darted her eyes down to you. Her jaw dropped to the ground for a brief second and a second later a grin replaced it.
“Oh! So you’re on the phone to Matty?” She questions loudly, in a very amused voice.
You didn’t answer her you just quickly started a new conversation by asking how the band were going to travel. You saw as she ran toward the door and opened it shouting for your other flat mates, Stacy and Tom.
When they both ventured out of their rooms, Ava asked them, “Guess who she’s on the phone to?”
“Matty?” They say in unison.
When they saw her reaction and you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling at them. They both looked at you with a big grin, but you wished you’d just ended the call then.
The boys must have heard Matty’s name being called down the phone, so they stopped talking and tried to listen in to what your friends were saying. You didn’t really notice though because your attention was now on your friends around you.
They all came and sat around you and started asking really loud questions so Matty could hear them.
“Matty what kinky shit does she want you to do this time?” Tom asked.
You sighed at that, especially when you heard chuckles on the other end of the phone. “Surprised you haven’t been on the phone sooner” Ava laughed.
Then Stacy practically shouted, “She’s got a new bed you can help her break in Matty”
“Would you all fuck off, I’m on the phone to George” You practically shouted them into silence.
“Wait, Fit George?” They asked.
You nod your head, “Yes, Fit George”
“What the fuck?” You heard George say on the other end of the phone.
“Yeah sorry George, you’re pretty famous over here and Ross I have a girlfriend ready and waiting for you, if you’re down” You told them, and you heard them all start laughing.
“Appreciate it, thanks Y/N. But only if it’s you” He joked, and you couldn’t help but giggle at that.
“Ross come over right now and I’ll show you a great time. Matty can vouch for that” You played along and laughed along when you heard them start laughing on the phone.
You drew your attention back to the people around you and noticed that Ava was now sending you fake glares. You smirked at her because she was the one you were going to set Ross up with.
You chuckled down the phone, “I’m only joking Ross, and I’m only saying that I’m joking because I’ve got your soon to be girlfriend sending me daggers right now”
You heard them chuckle down the phone and you murmured, “You have my number Ross, hit me up later babe”
You heard him laugh on the other end of the phone before you heard Ava whine next to you.
“You can’t fuck a whole band Y/N. Not after last time” Ava said loudly, and you hushed her.
“Wait, you fucked a whole band?” You heard Matty ask and you thought it would be best to end the conversation now.
“Anyway,” You divert from the topic quickly, “Before they force your numbers out of my phone, I’ll leave you guys to it. See you on April Seventh”
As you said that, you shook your head and glared at Ava. You couldn’t get the grin off your face though.
“See you then. Thanks for sorting it for us Y/N” George chuckled.
“Anytime. I’ll send you all the proper details by text, so I’ll chat to you later” You said as you tried to keep a straight face and not start laughing.
George made you love him even more when he said, “Awesome Y/N/N, thank you so much”
Bless him. He actually melted your heart.
“Anything for you George,” You cooed before saying a long “Byeeee”
“Cya” You heard them all say before the call was ended.
Or so you thought.
“So, are you gunna fuck Matty again?” Stacy asked with a grin.
You laughed as you shrugged your shoulders, “Never say never”
Matty heard this through the phone and suddenly he couldn’t wait for his birthday.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
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Ranking The 1975′s songs, from worst to best
The 1975 are unabashedly political, wildly eclectic in musical style, and masters of striking the perfect balance between strange and accessible. They’re also the most important, and arguably the best, band of the last five years or so.
However, despite their ability to pen generation-defining anthems and incredibly sticky pop hits, The 1975 have a fatal flaw: they overstuff their albums. All of their records, even their most consistent one (2018′s A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships) have at least a couple filler songs. Because of that, and because the Manchester band love to dabble in nearly every musical style on the planet (except hip-hop, which is probably for the best), a song-by-song evaluation is the best way to judge The 1975′s catalog. And with the recent release of their hit-and-miss fourth record, Notes On A Conditional Form, there’s not a better time to do just that.
But first, some ground rules:
1) To make the list, songs had to appear on one of The 1975′s four albums, or their four debut EPs (which I normally wouldn’t count, but they contain many of the band’s essential songs).
2) The 1975 love to include instrumental interludes on their records. I’m not ranking those — Matty Healy has to sing on the track for it to count.
3) The 1975 also begin every album with a self-titled song. Because three of them are variations on the same song, and the fourth is a spoken-word track with climate activist Greta Thunberg, these won’t be on the list either. (For the record, the best version of the song is their second attempt, although I respect the hell out of the Thunberg monologue.)
#69: “Is There Somebody Who Can Watch You” (The 1975, 2013)
The bottom of this list will be mostly comprised of the painfully boring, minimalist ballads that The 1975 used to end their albums with (thankfully, their last two album closers were phenomenal...we’ll get to them much later). One of the most appealing aspects of The 1975 is their bold, in-your-face style. A bland, hookless piano ballad like “Somebody” is the opposite of that. I already forgot how the tune goes.
#68: “Don’t Worry” (Notes On A Conditional Form, 2020)
The backstory behind “Don’t Worry” — lead singer/lyricist Matty Healy’s dad wrote it for his family ages ago, and now Healy’s recording his own version of it — is cute. The actual song, unfortunately, is a treacly mess that sounds like something from Barney & Friends. But if Barney aggressively, and unsuccessfully, tried to ripoff Bon Iver’s autotuned ballads.
#67: “She Lays Down” (I like it when you sleep, for you are so beautiful yet so unaware of it, 2016)
Postnatal depression is a real issue, and one that should be explored more in song. But The 1975 were clearly not the band to do it, judging by how boring and forgettable “She Lays Down” is.
#66: “Woman” (Facedown EP, 2012)
The band’s first boring closing track, way back on their debut EP! Considering how great Facedown’s other three songs are, this aimless ballad is a major disappointment.
#65: “Bagsy Not In Net” (Notes)
This overly reverb-y nothing of song is a prime example of something that should have been cut from the overlong Notes On A Conditional Form tracklist.
#64: “Playing On My Mind” (Notes)
Speaking of boring late-album songs from Notes that should’ve been left on the cutting room floor! At least this one has a halfway decent melody.
#63: “Surrounded By Heads and Bodies” (A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships, 2018)
The only interesting things about this shuffling ballad are A) the very metal song title that doesn’t match the actual tune at all, and B) Healy sings this song about a woman named Angela. Is this meant to be from the perspective of Dwight Schrute?
#62: “Head.Cars.Bending” (Music For Cars EP, 2013)
Later in their career, The 1975 would excel at off-kilter electronic jams. But “Head.Cars.Bending,” one of the band’s first attempts at that style, proves that it took a lot of practice to perfect that sound, because yikes — this is rough. That lurching beat makes me seasick.
#61: “Nana” (I like it...)
It’s not a track I ever return to, but I’ll admit that “Nana” has a nice melody and is an appropriately reverent and pretty tribute to Healy’s dead grandmother.
#60: “Inside Your Mind” (Brief Inquiry)
The 1975 attempted to blend shoegaze guitars with ‘80s cheeseball power ballads on “Inside Your Mind.” It was a noble attempt! The guitar lick sounds great! But the track sadly stays at one level throughout, so the song never achieves liftoff.
#59: “Talk!” (The 1975)
The 1975′s self-titled debut is an outlier in the band’s discography, as it came before the shameless (and fun!) genre-hopping of their next three records. In contrast, the debut has a very early-’10s, Urban Outfitters-core indie pop-rock sound throughout. On some songs, that sound works really well! But there’s also a glut of mediocre filler tracks that fit that sonic description. The stop-and-start, neck-jerking “Talk!” is one of those filler tracks.
#58: “Yeah I Know” (Notes)
One of the few musical styles that Notes returns to frequently during its runtime is a skittery, repetitive drum-and-bass sound. Although none of these songs are outright bad, they’re mostly not too interesting either. “Yeah I Know” is the worst of the bunch, with annoying chipmunk voice effects and a dreary vibe.
#57: “She Way Out” (The 1975)
"She Way Out,” despite having an opening lyric that calls back to one of The 1975′s very best songs (which we’ll get to much, much later), is just another one of the dime-a-dozen mediocre pop-rock nuggets that flood the tracklist of The 1975′s self-titled debut. The guitar lick is pretty tasty, I guess.
#56: “Pressure” (The 1975)
ƒAnd here’s another one of those pop-rock filler songs! At least this one has a nice shuffling groove. Still, I’ll stick with the charmingly bonkers Billy Joel song of the same name (and its gloriously awful, very early ‘80s music video).
#55: “The Birthday Party” (Notes)
This folksy ballad tries to jack the style of emo-country act Pinegrove, while Healy makes a half-hearted quip about the unclear acts of “sexual coercion” that the band’s lead singer admitted to. But “The Birthday Part” doesn’t have the concise songwriting or heart-wrenching emotions of “Old Friends.” Instead, it sort of just meanders around for a few minutes. The melody is nice — and I did enjoy Healy’s quip about not being able to poop in a shared hotel room, so he has to sneak to the hotel lobby — but most of the song just feels pointless.
#54: “Anobrain” (Music For Cars EP)
“Anobrain” reminds me a lot of a deep cut from one of my other favorite bands: U2′s “Promenade.” They’re both short, oblique slices of atmosphere and haze that are pretty, but don’t build into something greater. Think of “Anobrain” as a warmup for the superior nocturnal synthpop that The 1975 would pen in later records.
#53: “Undo” (Sex EP, 2012)
“Undo,” an otherwise standard early-era midtempo tune with lots of reverb, gets some bonus points for its smooth, swaying beat and a solid hook.
#52: “Mine” (Brief Inquiry)
When I imagined what “The 1975 does a jazz song” would sound like, I was hoping for something more frantic and bebop-y. “Mine” doesn’t sound like that at all — it’s a loungey slow-dance ballad that’s less Miles Davis and more Cole Porter. But regardless, it’s still an interesting detour. Who said quirky genre excursions were only limited to upbeat songs? Or that they had to be quirky?
#51: “The Ballad Of Me And My Brain” (I like it...)
I love the musical elements of “The Ballad” — the cascading drum fills, the thundering splashes of guitar, the twinkling keyboards, Healy’s delirious vocals. But the actual song itself doesn’t do much for me. Having a song about literally “losing your mind” and your brain is wandering in a grocery store, at a bar, etc. is a cute idea on paper, but it just sounds awkward in execution.
#50: “I Think There’s Something You Should Know” (Notes)
Here’s another of Notes’ repetitive drum-and-bass songs. But at least “I Think...” has a catchy tune and a bit more musical evolution throughout.
#49: “Haunt // Bed” (IV EP, 2013)
“Haunt // Bed” has one thing that distinguishes itself from other middling EP-era 1975 tracks: the pulsating loop that undulates beneath much of the song. It’s an interesting choice, and certainly helps the song stand out despite its forgettable melody.
#48: “Settle Down” (The 1975)
Probably the best of the debut album’s jangly pop-rock filler tracks, “Settle Down” still sounds like a weaker version of that record’s big singles. Which is interesting, as it was a single itself. But I’m certainly not going to kick it out of bed — the soaring chorus is legitimately great, and the funky guitar riff is nice.
#47: “Paris” (I like it...)
This mid-tempo, snarky character study about a drug-addicted party girl almost feels like 1975 on auto pilot. But just because Healy and co. could knock out a song like this in their sleep, that doesn’t mean “Paris” isn’t a pleasant, silky smooth comedown from the zanier cuts on I like it.
#46: “Then Because She Goes” (Notes)
The 1975 going full Slowdive and making a fuzzy, shoegaze-y jam? Sounds incredible! Unfortunately, “Then Because She Goes” doesn’t quite live up to that premise, mostly because it’s so brief. At just a notch over two minutes, the song doesn’t give itself anytime to expand or go anywhere interesting. It’s a case of wasted potential, but at least the sliver of a song we got is decent.
#45: “Be My Mistake” (Brief Inquiry)
There are a couple exceptions to the “The 1975 shouldn’t do acoustic guitar ballads” rule. “Be My Mistake” is one of them. It’s nothing spectacular, but the melody is quite pretty, and Healy’s troubadour act is sweet. Also, unlike some of the earlier acoustic ballads, there’s no studio gimmickry or weird vocal filters: it’s just a nice coffeeshop ballad.
#44: “M.O.N.E.Y.” (The 1975)
It’s a bit strange that The 1975 decided to slot this single so high in their debut album’s tracklist, ahead of much catchier, more obvious hits. But there’s something infectious to the winking lyrics and jittery production that sounds like clanging slot machines.
#43: “This Must Be My Dream” (I like it...)
If there’s been one constant to The 1975′s albums, it’s that there’ll be at least a couple big, cheesy ‘80s homages. And I’m a huge sucker for those songs. “This Must Be My Dream” is the worst of the bunch — it’s a bit uninspired — but big crashing synths and drum machines are still a weakness for me. Also, Healy’s vocals sound eerily like Phil Collins here...not sure if that’s a plus or minus.
#42: “Roadkill” (Notes)
The superior version of “The Birthday Party,” for two reasons. One: instead of the band half-heartedly dipping its toes into an alt-country sound, “Roadkill” has BIG honky-tonk energy with its twangy guitars and dusty groove. Two: Healy’s little anecdotes are much more interesting and strange here. It still doesn’t have much of a hook or anything, but “Roadkill” is alright by me.
#41: “Lostmyhead” (I like it...)
Putting “Lostmyhead,” a fan-favorite deep cut, in the bottom half of this ranking is a bit of a hot take. So let me make it clear: this is a good song! The issue is, I feel about “Lostmyhead” the way those who dislike The 1975 describe the band’s other genre excursions: it just doesn’t come close to the original. Here, they’re clearly trying to emulate M83′s cinematic post-rock. And it’s passable! But it’s certainly no “Outro” or “Moonchild.”
#40: “Nothing Revealed / Everything Denied” (Notes)
This quirky number feels like a grab bag of various styles The 1975 have tried on throughout the years: a gospel chorus! Sort-of rapped auto-tune verses! A Mark Knopfler-esque guitar solo that sounds like it was recorded two rooms away, for some reason! It doesn’t quite add up to a classic, but it’s certainly attention grabbing, particularly Healy’s self-critical lyrics.
#39: “I Couldn’t Be More In Love” (Brief Inquiry)
Melodramatic late-‘80s R&B isn’t my favorite musical style, so that dings “I Couldn’t Be More In Love” a few points for me. But Healy is absolutely SELLING this thing vocally, corny key changes and all. And drummer/producer George Daniel expertly captures that specific era with some charmingly chintzy keyboard tones.
#38: “What Should I Say” (Notes)
This detour into robotic dancehall doesn’t work quite as well for me as the other track on Notes with this sound, the Cutty Ranks-led “Shiny Collarbone” (which didn’t qualify for this list, as Healy doesn’t sing on it). But “What Should I Say” is solid in its own right, with some twisty keyboard licks and lots of gorgeous chopped-up vocal samples.
#37: “Tonight (I Wish I Was Your Boy)” (Notes)
It’s a cute old-school soul song at its core (with a prominent Temptations sample!), but I feel like the lurching synths and occasional chipmunk vocals don’t work well with the more traditionalist tune. It’s an interesting test of mixing new and old, but it’s not entirely successful here.
#36: “So Far (It’s Alright)” (IV EP)
This song describes itself pretty accurately: It’s alright! Okay, fine, it’s actually pretty great. The twinkling pianos and Healy’s ghostly vocals are an atypical backdrop for adolescent stories of debauchery and angst, but it somehow works. It’s a song built to naturally cool down a house party.
#35: “Girls” (The 1975)
We’re about halfway through the list, so it seems like a pretty good time to talk about “Girls” — a big early hit for The 1975, but with a sound the group has clearly evolved from. It’s basically a catchier, sharper improvement on their debut album’s jangly pop-rock filler tracks.
But although that chorus is quite sticky, and the groove is nice, it’s not as interesting or unique as The 1975′s later hits, or even other singles from that same album. Another mid-10s semi-indie band of pretty boys could’ve easily recorded it (but it would’ve been their best song).
#34: “Menswear” (The 1975)
This is the point of the countdown at which where each track left is unequivocally a classic. I feel a bit bad putting “Menswear” — a slinky synthpop deep cut with a killer synth riff — this low on the list. But it just shows how many other incredible songs The 1975 have.
#33: “Loving Someone” (I like it...)
I like it when you sleep... doesn’t have quite as much genre hopping as their next two records. Instead, much of it it crystalized the ideal “1975 sound” — of-kilter but sleek synth-heavy rock with some ‘80s influence and some out-there lyrics. “Loving Someone” is a great song in that vein, with Healy delivering some wonderfully pretentious lyrics (“I’m the Greek economy of cashing intellectual checks”) and George Daniel creating a gorgeous cacophony of whirring synths and vocal samples to back him up.
#32: “Facedown” (Facedown EP)
The world’s proper introduction to The 1975, the band’s first song on their debut EP is a perfect distillation of their EP-era sound. The dream-pop keyboards and the processed, nearly Daft Punk-esque vocals make “Facedown” an intriguing invitation into The 1975′s nocturnal world of drugs, women and depression. It might honestly be a better teasing leadoff than the iconic self-titled track that opens The 1975′s full-length albums.
#31: “Heart Out” (The 1975)
This otherwise just-decent synthpop number is elevated by one aspect: the synth bass is incredible. The constant pulsating throb throughout the track gives the song an early-MTV vibe, lending it a sense of drive.
#30: “How To Draw / Petrichor” (Brief Inquiry)
In multiple interviews, Healy described A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships into his attempt at making Radiohead’s OK Computer for a new generation. But with its glitchy, robotic aesthetic, “How To Draw / Petrichor” is much more Kid A.
But despite my distaste for Radiohead’s more experimental side, I really love The 1975′s pastiche of it! Probably because, like the best 1975 songs, it has a really strong melody. But unlike many of their other great tunes, “How To Draw” is a snaking, constantly evolving track that’s mostly instrumental. Instrumental tracks aren’t usually for me, so the fact that this holds my attention for nearly 6 minutes is a strong sign.
#29: “Me” (Music For Cars EP)
"Me” is The 1975 at arguably their most sad-sack. Healy’s vocals are leaden and filled with guilt. At point, he casually tosses aside, “I was thinking about killing myself, don’t you mind.”
The music is a perfect match — the rhythm is plodding and heavy in the best way, and the mournful sax solo in the bridge stays just on the right side of cheesy. It’s a genuinely affecting ballad.
#28: “Give Yourself A Try” (Brief Inquiry)
This was the first taste of A Brief Inquiry we heard. And I really disliked it at first — the clanging, messy guitars and motorik rhythm didn’t connect with me at first.
But — strangely for a lead single — "Give Yourself A Try” is a grower! Healy’s lyrics are in his sweet spot of being legitimately sincere, gloriously snarky and absolutely ridiculous at the same time. And the pounding groove burrows its way into your skull until you find it endearing. The band’s next attempt at a more RAWK single on their fourth album worked a bit better, but “Give Yourself A Try” is pretty damn great for a Joy Division ripoff.
#27: “Intro / Set3″ (Sex EP)
This was essentially The 1975′s warmup version of the multi-part electronic sweep of “How To Draw.” Yet, I like "Intro / Set3″ a tad more. It’s more direct and has a stronger hook.
#26: “If I Believe You” (I like it...)
“If I Believe You” joins the legacy of pasty British/Irish rock bands making unexpectedly strong gospel songs. Although it’s not quite on the same transcendent level as The Rolling Stones’ and U2′s attempts, it’s at least on Blur’s level.
I love how Healy took the religious genre and used it for a song that’s all about religious confusion. He vents to a god that he doesn’t really believe in, wondering if religion would solve his myriad problems. The song doesn’t arrive at a clean conclusion, but it’s still a fascinating track about doubts and why people turn to a higher power.
#25: “People” (Notes)
In a whole career of random left-turns, scream-y punk rock might be the most unexpected yet for The 1975. “People” — which directly follows an apocalyptic spoken word intro from climate activist Greta Thunberg on its album — is a piercing jolt of energy that’s impossible to ignore.
"People” is definitely a polarizing track, even for fans of the band. It’s extremely aggressive, angry, and might freak out your friend who just wanted to hear more songs like “Chocolate.” But even though I think the lyrics (although admirably ballsy!) are a bit of a mess, I love the no-holds-back rage of “People.” If you’re going to try an out-there genre experiment, dive in headfirst.
#24: “Frail State Of Mind” (Notes)
By far the best of Notes’ drum-and-bass tracks, “Frail State Of Mind” feels like an actual, fleshed-out song rather than just the band dinking around with some new rhythms.
The skittering percussion, mournful vocal samples and melancholy lyrics help to create a gorgeous, downbeat track. It’s the audio equivalent of sitting inside on a drizzly day, listening to the rain hit the roof: sad, but also content.
#23: “TOOTIMETOOTIMETOOTIME” (Brief Inquiry)
Okay, so remember that hot minute in the mid-2010s when pop music pivoted hard into a gentrified, bland tropical house sound? Justin Bieber was the biggest offender? Well, The 1975 jumped on that bandwagon a few years later with “TOOTIME” ... yet it wound up sounding much better than any of the actual hit songs it was ripping off.
Why does The 1975′s tropical house banger actually work? First off, it embraces its non-tropical Britishness: with the chilly synths and auto-tuned vocals, it barely emulates the Caribbean outside of its rhythm. Furthermore, that rhythm is a tad faster than many of those mid-10s hits, making the song feel less like a drag and more like a traditional pop banger. But most importantly — it’s catchy as hell. Good luck getting that chorus out of your head.
#22: “Jesus Christ 2005 God Bless America” feat. Phoebe Bridgers (Notes)
“Jesus Christ” is easily the biggest exception to my “The 1975 shouldn’t do acoustic ballads” rule. And that’s primarily because they brought alone one of the modern masters of that form: Phoebe Bridgers.
Healy’s quietly emotive vocals and knack for lilting melodies fit in perfectly with Bridgers’ whispered folksy musical world. And of course, it’s nice to hear another voice on a 1975 song, especially if it’s as evocative as Bridgers’. Both she and Healy sing short vignettes of tortured, non-reciprocated same-sex crushes, and it’s a prime example of the power of compact storytelling.
#21: “She’s American” (I like it...)
As I warned earlier, the top of this list is going to have a lot of The 1975′s trips into pure ‘80s synth cheese. So let’s dive right into that!
“She’s American” is just pure fun, from Healy’s cheeky lyrics poking fun at his American lover, to the swirling synths and shiny guitars. It’s like a long-lost Duran Duran banger.
#20: “You” (Sex EP)
For a rock band that loves bombast, it’s surprising that The 1975 don’t tap into the U2/Coldplay arena rock sound more often. But the couple times they tried it, they nailed the landing.
“You” is a stark departure from the nocturnal angst of much of The 1975′s other EP-era songs. It’s bright, major-key, and meant to be blasted to the cheap seats of an arena. The guitar riff is pure The Edge, and the song just keeps getting bigger and bigger, louder and louder. “You” sounds like pure euphoria by the time it reaches its climax.
#19: “UGH!” (I like it...)
We’ll file this in the “Healy vents about his drug addiction over a super-sleek pop song” folder. And like most of those songs, “UGH!” is a total winner.
The guitars and synths are so liquid and snappy that it’s hard to tell them apart (in a good way!). And Healy gloriously vamps over the ‘80s Bowie groove, pontificating about his coke habit is ruining his life. The attention to detail here is admirable — from the chic plastic production to Healy making an aside about how the song only lasts three minutes. Guess how long “UGH!” is, to the exact second?
#18: “The City” (Facedown and IV EPs, The 1975)
This song was clearly a favorite in the band’s early days: it was on two of their four EPs, and was the first non-intro track on their debut album. “The City” absolutely deserves all that love, though.
First, to be clear: the re-recorded version on the self-titled debut album is much better. The 1975 are not one of those bands that sounds better with a DIY, low-fi aesthetic — they need that studio sheen! And on the re-recorded version, the absolute best aspect of “The City” gets to shine: THOSE DRUMS. They slam against your eardrums with the force of a Mack truck, and help propel an otherwise-just-solid pop tune into a classic.
#17: “Sincerity Is Scary” (Brief Inquiry)
This is a song that probably shouldn’t work: jazzy horns, an off-kilter beat and a towering gospel choir in service of a song about how the internet has ruined the way we relate to people? It’s all a bit much. But luckily, “a bit much” is The 1975′s sweet spot.
Strangely enough, this shuffling single feels effortless and natural, despite having wordy lyrics and not sounding like any Top 40 song in recently memory. Also, it’s the band’s best music video. It’s creative and absolutely adorable.
#16: “Love Me” (I like it...)
If there’s one older band The 1975 is constantly compared to, it’s ‘80s Aussie legends INXS. It’s a bit of a strange comparison — The 1975 are shameless genre-hoppers. INXS had one (really great!) signature pop-rock sound that they stuck with for most of their big hits.
But I understand where that comparison comes from, because “Love Me” is the most dead-on INXS pastiche I’ve ever heard. It wouldn’t shock me to learn it’s a cover of a forgotten Kick B-side. The wiry guitars, bouncy rhythm, winking lyrics about fame and sex, hits of wiggly synths and horns — it’s all the elements that made a song like “New Sensation” so great. The music video even features Healy, with long curly hair, preening around shirtless like Michael Hutchence!
Look, if you’re going to shamelessly rip someone off, you might as well rip off a great band at its best moment. And The 1975 channelled peak-INXS better than anyone since 1988 (even the band itself!) with “Love Me.”
#15: “Antichrist” (Facedown EP)
“Antichrist” is probably The 1975′s most goth song. It opens with a stately organ, and Healy sings the first verse in the very lowest part of his vocal register. It’s a stark departure from any other song of theirs, which of course grabs your attention.
But the funeral dirge vibes, as cool as they are, aren’t the only factor that makes “Antichrist” a great song. The minimalist guitar solo semi-chorus is stunning, like something Interpol would’ve done. And when Healy cranks up his vocal stylings for the song’s second half, it injects a bit of energy. The punishing, near-shoegaze finale to the song is masterful as well.
Despite it being a fan favorite from their very-first EP, “Antichrist” has infamously never been played live. And honestly, I’m okay with that — this seems like a bolt of gloom-and-doom lightning that would be nearly impossible to re-create in some mid-sized arena in Des Moines.
#14: “If You’re Too Shy (Let Me Know)” (Notes)
It’s a bit of a bummer that easily the three best songs off of Notes On A Conditional Form all easily slide into The 1975′s pop-rock comfort zone. But even if that album’s experiments fell a bit flat, it’s nice to know the band can still hit its sweet spot over and over again without getting tiring.
“If You’re Too Shy” is a perfect ‘80s synthpop banger, complete with some very-1975 lyrics about a couple meeting online and immediately objectifying each other. But the lyrics are really not the selling point of the song — it’s the taut new-wave rhythm, the twinkling synths, the ROARING sax solo, and that insanely sticky chorus (maybe the catchiest the band’s had). It’s the kind of song that could’ve played during that absurd library dance scene from Breakfast Club. It’s a timeless jam of the highest order, and impossible to resist.
#13: “I Like America & America Likes Me” (A Brief Inquiry)
As much of a big deal I make about The 1975′s experimental, don’t-give-a-fuck nature, most of my favorite songs of theirs are their more conventional pop songs. Sorry, I’m lame!
But regardless, I adore “I Like America,” a truly strange electronic freakout that encapsulates all the anxieties and fears of the world’s young people. It’s electrifying and horrifying in equal measure.
Of course, a much more famous 1975 song coming on this list does this concept a little better lyrically, and has more of an actual hook to back it up. Still, there’s something poignant about “I Like America,” particularly Healy’s unhinged performance. He spends most of the song hysterically yelling out into the void lines like “I’M SCARED OF DYING, IT’S FINE” and “WOULD YOU PLEASE LISTEN.” And the chaotic, undulating wave of vocal samples, drum machines and synths seems to get stronger with every second.
#12: “Chocolate” (Music For Cars EP, The 1975)
Easily The 1975′s biggest hit in the U.S., “Chocolate” could’ve easily pinned the band into the bin of other just-decent Tumblr-friendly indie bands in the early ‘10s. They could’ve been the British version of The Neighbourhood (remember “Sweater Weather?”).
But just because The 1975 quickly moved away from the super-sugary pop rock of “Chocolate,” that doesn’t mean the tune is a simple trifle. I mean, okay, it is — but it’s a perfect trifle! The hook is basically the entire song, and for good reason: it’s freakishly catchy. “Chocolate” is one of those songs you’ll have stuck in your head for weeks afterward. And that bouncy groove is *chef’s kiss*.
“Chocolate” was bound to be noticed by the world: it was too pristine to be ignored.
#11: “The Sound” (I like it...)
Am I underrating this? Maybe.
When I first heard “The Sound,” it was the first 1975 song I truly loved. The bouncy house piano, thumping four-on-the-floor beat and simple sing-along chorus drew me in like a siren call. And it still sounds fantastic four years later!
Really, the only bad thing you could say about “The Sound” is that the band made a couple even better synthpop jams later. This was sort of a warm up, their first truly great ‘80s costume party. But even though it’s been surpassed, “The Sound” is still a delight today. At the very least, it has the band’s best-ever guitar solo.
#10: “I Always Wanna Die (Sometimes)” (A Brief Inquiry)
Y’all know the classic Oasis power ballad “Champagne Supernova,” right? It’s incredibly epic, but the lyrics are infamously meaningless. What if a band wrote a similar Britpop power ballad, with an equally anthemic chorus, but actually injected a legitimate, moving theme?
That happened! The 1975 did it with “I Always Wanna Die (Sometimes),” maybe the most uplifting song about suicide ever written. Healy penned some of his most empathetic lyrics here, all about how, well, sometimes we all want to die. Always. His chorus is a moment of glorious angsty catharsis — the emo lyrics of My Chemical Romance set to the sweeping strings and towering guitars of a Coldplay single.
This song is 100% my sweet spot, as a person with depression who loves a corny U2 ballad. It’s a shame The 1975 don’t operate in this vein more often — they’re quite good at it.
#9: “Sex” (Sex EP, The 1975)
The 1975 are barely a “rock” band in the truest sense. Yeah, they have a guitar player and a drummer and whatnot, but most of their music leans more on the pop side of things.
But “Sex,” one of the band’s earliest hits, legitimately rocks. It’s a raging, almost pop-punk jam that proves The 1975 can make a fantastic headbanger anytime they like. The frenzied tune is pure adrenaline, which makes sense given it’s about the forbidden thrill of cheating.
During the band’s last major tour, when “Sex” was played during the encore, the massive screen simply read “ROCK AND ROLL IS DEAD” while Matty Healy violently smashed a guitar at the song’s conclusion. Ironically, he proved the opposite.
#8: “Guys” (Notes)
This one’s just too cute.
“Guys” has an incredibly clever — and admittedly quite cheesy — conceit: Healy wrote a love song, but instead of being about romance, it’s about his platonic adoration for his fellow band members. It’s funny how most of The 1975′s songs about dating tend to be bitter or depressed, while arguably their most head-over-heels tune is about how much the four titular guys love spending time and writing songs together.
Even though it was written before the COVID-19 pandemic, “Guys” still fits the moment eerily well. Healy’s vocals and the lilting melody have a bittersweet tone, and the opening refrain of “I was missing the guys” could easily be about quarantining.
“Guys” won’t be for everyone. Some might roll their eyes at its aggressive sincerity. But if it catches me in a certain mood, it really has an effect on me. It’s perhaps the greatest bromance song ever written.
#7: “Fallingforyou” (IV EP)
The best song from The 1975′s EP era, “Fallingforyou” is a gorgeous, minimalist ballad that could’ve only come from the band’s less pretentious early years.
Healy switches between a conversational mumble and an angelic falsetto on the nocturnal track, giving it an intimate feel. It’s almost like he’s right next to you in the backseat of some car at 2 a.m. The dreamy, rumbling background gives “Fallingforyou” almost a Beach House or Chromatics vibe, and it suits the band well.
The 1975 is far too extra nowadays to try another song as quiet, serene and gimmick-free as “Fallingforyou.” But at least we have the one.
#6: “Me & You Together Song” (Notes)
The 1975 already have so many songs that try to recreate the magic of mid ‘80s pop-rock. And although they could probably keep mining that sound forever, it would be nice to see them try homages to other golden eras of pop music. And “Me & You Together Song” does just that.
With this bouncy, propulsive power pop jam, The 1975 were clearly aiming for a Y2K-era adult alternative vibe. It wouldn’t be hard to see The Goo Goo Dolls or Third Eye Blind performing a song like this, with the chugging guitars, snarky-yet-romantic lyrics and endless energy.
Daniel and Healy wrote a groove and effortless melody for “Me & You” that could probably go on forever — and it almost does! The last 75 seconds or so of the single just repeat the refrain over and over, and although normally that kind of repetition drives me nuts, it feels natural for this tune.
#5: “A Change of Heart” (I like it...)
One of two all-time classic breakup songs off of The 1975′s second album, “A Change of Heart” is crushing in the most pedestrian way. It’s not anything melodramatic or exaggerated — it’s simply the story of a couple naturally drifting apart.
Healy’s lyrics are rich with details here, from pithy asides about not smoking cigarettes correctly and Instagramming salads to a rather blunt description of falling out of love: “You used to have a face straight out of a magazine/Now you just look like anyone.”
Interestingly, Daniel decided to accompany the unromantic lyrics with some of the band’s most dreamy production. It sounds like a prom scene from a John Hughes high school movie. But that dissonance works — it sets up a fantasy and then shatters it.
#4: “It’s Not Living (If It’s Not With You)” (A Brief Inquiry)
You want to know why I left “The Sound” out of the top 10? Here’s why: “It’s Not Living” takes that same hyper-sleek ‘80s synthpop sound but improves upon it with a stickier hook, dark lyrics and a killer guitar riff.
Strangely for such a perky and bouncy song, “It’s Not Living” is about Healy’s struggles to get over a heroin addiction. It’s a smart lyrical trick, framing his difficulty with quitting smack as being similar to not getting over a rough breakup. And it’s downright genius to pair such a dark topic with such a fun instrumental, Passion Pit-style. “It’s Not Living” is the band’s finest pure pop song, and a success they’ll no doubt try to repeat for the rest of their career.
#3: “Robbers” (The 1975)
This is the pinnacle of The 1975′s early career young-and-dumb anthems. It turns literally robbing a bank into a sweeping, heartfelt power ballad.
Alright, alright, fine ... it’s not literally about robbing a bank; it’s a metaphor for a toxic, co-dependent relationship, according to the band. But that deeper meaning is pretty hard to pick up on when Healy’s singing about guns and screaming “NOW EVERYBODY’S DEAAAAAAD” on the bridge. Honestly, “Robbers” being a tragic Romeo and Juliet-style story sounds much more plausible.
But lyrics aside, the chugging guitars and soaring chorus hit you right in the gut. “Robbers” could be about shopping at Pottery Barn and it would still be an incredible tour-de-force of a song. But its brutal ending elevates it even further. That cruelly ironic final line, “Babe, you look so cool” — which Healy sounds like he’s singing through tears — lands like a sledgehammer every time.
#2: “Love It If We Made It” (A Brief Inquiry)
The words “generational anthem” tend to get thrown around a lot online about various tracks. But “Love It If We Made It” deserves that moniker.
I have yet to hear a song that better describes the acute stress and psychological horror of being a Millennial or Gen Zer while the world collapses around you. The ice caps are melting, police brutality is rampant, the refugee crisis is accelerating, and the world’s leaders are too corrupt and/or incompetent to do anything to fix these problems.
Unlike many political anthems, Healy doesn’t sound angry on “Love It If We Made It.” He sounds terrified. The title itself makes the song’s theme clear: we just want to survive this mess. And we’re pretty sure that we won’t.
With 2020 being an absolutely awful year so far (oh hi, COVID!), “Love It If We Made It” unfortunately sounds just as powerful today as it did a couple years ago. Hopefully, there comes a day when this song sounds less visceral and chilling and more like a relic of the past. But that day hasn’t come yet.
#1: “Somebody Else” (I like it...)
If there is a “The 1975 sound” — which is kind of ridiculous, seeing as the band changes up their sound so much, but still — “Somebody Else” is the perfect example of it. It’s both deeply indebted to ‘80s new wave, yet wholly modern-sounding. Healy’s lyrics are laughably pretentious yet cuttingly relatable. And it packages complicated emotions into an undeniable, melancholy pop nugget.
Healy’s exploration of tangled, better emotions on “Somebody Else” about his ex — who he mistakenly thought he was over —finding a new partner is sadly a place we’ve all been. “I don’t want your body/but I hate to think about you with somebody else” — who can’t relate?
Daniels’ nocturnal production is sleek, slippery and heartwrenching in its own right. The scattered, distorted vocal samples almost mock Healy’s emotions, and the shuffling beat adds a nice pulse to the proceedings. If you’re in the proper mood and setting, there are few better breakup songs to blast and mope around to.
"Somebody Else” one of the all-time great breakup anthems, as well as a top-tier song to drive around to at night when you’re sad. And it’s The 1975′s best-ever song.
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noa...
ur name is so short...i made u two
noa v. 1: you and your high top sneakers and your sailor tattoos [punkish]no hope kids - wavvesno hope kids are bruisedno hope kids are bruisedold white lincoln - the gaslight anthemyou and your high-top sneakers and your sailor tattoosand your old fifty-five that you drove through the roofof the sky up above these indifferent starsall those friendly people - funeral suitstake me take mefar awayfrom this city's soul decayhid away 'til I was eighteenonly saw colours on a tv screenskinny jeans and sunglassesa fashion statement for the masseswhat your doing makes me sickover hyped and generic
noa v. 2: the city’s feeling queer and crass [tender]nara dremland - nicole dollangagerhe tried to tell me things get abandonedit's okay for them to roti told him that we should find some gasolinehe said we'd better noto0Oo0Oo - oberhoferand the city's feeling queer and crasswith beer cans growing blades of grassto look like something newanobrain - the 1975jeans so newwe should eat one before 2man I'm so high I think i love youi was thinking about leaving againit all dependsare we just friendscan you leave a little bit of your kfor you, babeit's a no brainwe take your mums car to the edge of the townand we driveyeah we go round and round
#asks#please send more but do not expect the same level of effort i just pout into noa's aldskjglsdggds
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( * &. ━ THE 1975 EP’S LYRIC STARTERS
FACEDOWN.
‘ he’s black and blue and facedown. ’
‘ she’s rushing in your bed. ’
‘ i lost my head. ’
‘ i lost my head, can you see it? ’
THE CITY.
‘ don’t call it a fight when you know it’s a war. ’
‘ go sit on the bed. ’
‘ i know that you want to. ’
‘ go sit on the bed because i know that you want to. ’
‘ you got pretty eyes. ’
‘ i know you’re wrong. ’
‘ don’t call it a spade if it isn’t a spade. ’
‘ get in the shower if it all goes wrong. ’
‘ are you feeling alright? ’
‘ you’ll be feeling just fine. ’
‘ you hope that the boy will be alright. ’
ANTICHRIST.
‘ i swear there’s a ghost on this island. ’
‘ of course, my dear, you can’t. ’
‘ how can i relate to somebody who doesn’t speak? ’
‘ i feel like i’m treading water. ’
‘ is it the same for you? ’
‘ i love the house that we live in. ’
‘ i love you all too much. ’
‘ you can’t stand it at all. ’
WOMAN.
‘ i’m bursting at the seams. ’
‘ i’ve got a woman now. ’
‘ this one’s on the house. i don’t mind. ’
‘ it all tastes the same. ’
‘ there’s something different about your mouth. ’
‘ you try chasing your dreams. ’
‘ man, it’s harder than it seems. ’
INTRO / SET3.
‘ the skin that you’re in is all soft now. ’
‘ what you sitting ‘round here for? ’
‘ why are you sad? ’
‘ everybody’s pushing out babies now. ’
‘ in the mornings, i was getting high with you. ’
‘ well, i thought i’d see you around, but you’re dead now. ’
‘ i thought i’d see you around. ’
UNDO.
‘ stick another pill in my head and go to bed. ’
‘ we’re not doing it again, so leave it. ’
‘ i didn’t even see you when i liked you, now i ain’t got no time. ’
‘ girl, i wanna see you undo it. ’
‘ i wanna see you, but you’re not mine. ’
‘ i could hear you giving her head. ’
‘ you think we’re doing it again? keep dreaming. ’
‘ keep dreaming. ’
SEX.
‘ this is how it starts. ’
‘ my shirt looks so good when it’s just hanging off your back. ’
‘ we’ve got one thing in common, it’s this tongue of mine. ’
‘ she’s got a boyfriend anyway. ’
‘ all we seem to do is talk about sex. ’
‘ i’m about to fill his shoes. ’
‘ does he take care of you? ’
‘ could i easily fill his shoes? ’
‘ i’m not trying to stop you, love. ’
‘ if we’re gonna do anything, we might as well just fuck. ’
YOU.
‘ you’re a liar. ’
‘ you’re a liar, at least all of your friends are. and so am i. ’
‘ it’s my party and i’ll cry to the end. ’
‘ you must try harder than kissing all of my friends. ’
‘ it takes a bit more. ’
‘ it takes a bit more than you. ’
‘ you’re alive. ’
‘ you’re alive, at least as far as i can tell you are. ’
‘ it’s so ironic how it’s only been a year. ’
‘ it’s not my fault that i fucked everybody here. ’
‘ do you wanna dance? ’
MILK.
‘ she said the bleeding’s incidental cause she’s so cool. ’
‘ i’m no fun if i’ve only a bottle of wine. ’
‘ slow down. ’
‘ yeah, i want you. ’
‘ she started talking about missing him. ’
‘ she was glistening. ’
‘ it won’t mend your heart if it’s only a couple of lines. ’
ANOBRAIN.
‘ man, i’m so high, i think i love you. ’
‘ i’m so high. ’
‘ i think i love you. ’
‘ i was thinking about leaving again. ’
‘ are we just friends? ’
CHOCOLATE.
‘ we go where nobody knows. ’
‘ no, we’re never gonna quit it. ’
‘ we’re dressed in black from head to toe. ’
‘ we’ve got guns hidden under our petticoats. ’
‘ you’re never gonna quit it if you don’t stop smoking it. ’
‘ i think we better go. ’
‘ the feds are here, you know. ’
HEAD.CARS.BENDING.
‘ keep your voice down. ’
‘ stop looking at my friends. ’
‘ they can hear exactly what you say. ’
‘ drink, fall, spew, telephone you. ’
‘ if you’re alone in your room, what’s that boy doing? ’
‘ can we go now? ’
‘ not staying ‘til the end. ’
‘ if you think you’re helping me, i don’t think i’m helping you. ’
ME.
‘ got on a plane in the middle of the night. ’
‘ don’t you mind. ’
‘ i nearly killed somebody. ’
‘ i gave you something you can never give back. ’
‘ you’ve seen your face like a heart attack. ’
‘ i was late, but i arrived. ’
‘ i’m sorry, but i’d rather be getting high. ’
‘ i think i did something terrible to your body. ’
‘ i was thinking ‘bout killing myself, don’t you mind. ’
‘ i love you, don’t you mind. ’
HAUNT // BED.
‘ i’m sorry that your dad is dead. ’
‘ i hope you amend it. ’
‘ i think i’ve lost a lot of my friends. ’
‘ fuck me if you must then. ’
‘ treat me like an old friend. ’
‘ i can’t exist within my own head. ’
‘ so i insist on haunting your bed. ’
‘ i’m not scared. ’
‘ what if they’re saying is true? ’
‘ i prefer it in your bed. ’
SO FAR (IT’S ALRIGHT).
‘ so far, it’s alright. ’
‘ it’s the way we are. ’
‘ i used to think you were cool and i believed you had a wonderful vision. ’
‘ i soon found out you’re a terrible friend. ’
‘ how you getting along with your life? ’
‘ i’m coming to the end of 23, is that alright? ’
‘ it’s coming to the end of you and me, is that alright? ’
‘ how can you complain about life and talk about being bored? ’
‘ i was always looking for a way to get out. ’
‘ you’re alright. ’
‘ you can cry until 11. ’
‘ why stay if you hate it so much? ’
‘ you think you’re well cool. ’
‘ you just write about sex and killing yourself. ’
‘ don’t you want to take me up in the clouds? ’
‘ pretend that i’m the one. ’
‘ she was talking marriage so we had to get out. ’
‘ he’s making up for it by sleeping about. ’
‘ your ultimatum’s a ridiculous joke. ’
‘ i’m gonna pick the option that allows me to smoke. ’
‘ it’s alright, baby. ’
#ask meme#indie rp#sentence starters#lyric starters#inbox meme#rp meme#askbox meme#rp ask#rp ask meme#rp ask box meme#rp sentence meme#sentence starter meme#rp sentence starters#starters#inbox memes#rp inbox meme#inbox starters#rp
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tag game
thank u @parate-regis for tagging me!!! :)
how tall are you?
im 5 ft 5 in
what color are your eyes?
green! (fun fact: i have a freckle in my left eye)
do you wear contacts and/or glasses?
i use my glasses when i can stuff from far like when im driving also when im using the computer
do you wear braces?
nope!
what is your fashion sense?
umm i really dont know for know its just comfortable clothes lmao but trust me if i had money i would be a fashion icon 💅🏻
when were you born?
august 30th
how old are you?
18
do you have any siblings?
i have a younger sister, an older half sister, and a step brother (except i dont talk to the last two so i dont consider them family)
what school/college do you go to?
Clown University
what kind of student are you?
im a pretty average student i dont really put more work into things than i need to unless i really like the subject or something
what are your favorite movies?
the shining, harry potter, & coco
what are your favorite pastimes?
mostly listening to music or watching netflix or videos on youtube
do you have any regrets?
the only one i can think of now is not taking AP spanish in hs but i dont dwell on it
what is your dream job?
my greatest dream has always been to be a musician & performer but i know how the music industry is so i decided to not pursue it. its not a regret of mine tho bc im v happy with languages
would you like to get married?
yup hopefully one day i do
do you want kids?
uhh for now no... but if i ever do then i guess 1 or 2 but thats on thin ice
how many countries have you visited?
14
what was your scariest dream?
i used to have reocurring dreams where i was just slowly stop breathing and suffocate lmao
do you have a boy/girl friend/ significant other?
nahh
put your playlist on shuffle and without skipping the first 15 songs:
absolute reprise - midnight
lullabye - fall out boy
bbblue - olivver the kid
novocaine - fall out boy
give me love - ed sheeran
overdose - armors
weak when ur around - blackbear
anobrain - the 1975
my heart is lost - blackbear
santa monica & la brea - blackbear
japanese denim - daniel caesar
radioactive - marina & the diamonds
heavens gate - fall out boy
bitter fuck - joji
shovia - atlesta
i tag: @lemonadeandlanguages @aspoonfuloflanguage @liu-anhuaming @lukas-langs @somalang @languagemoon @multilingual-musings and anyone else who wants 2 do this!!
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Tagged by @dvlans-obrien
Rules: Answer the questions in a new post and tag 10 blogs you would like to get to know better.
A - Age: 16
B - Birthplace: new zealand
C - Current Time: 8:07am
D - Drink You Last Had: tea
E - Easiest Person To Talk To: my best friend :)
F - Favorite Song: currently when you were young by the killers
G - Grossest Memory: Throwing up
H - Horror Yes or Horror No: depends if I'm in the mood
I - In Love?: not sure anymore
J - Jealous of People?: yeah lmao i shouldn’t be though
L - Love At First Sight Or Should I Walk By Again: love at first sight dude ;)
M - Middle Name: jane
N - Number of Siblings: 1
O - One Wish: to be okay
P - Person You Called Last: My mum
Q - Question You Are Always Asked: what are you doing?
R - Reason to Smile: concerts
S - Song You Sang Last: anobrain - the 1975
T - Time You Woke Up: 7:15am
U - Underwear Colour: black
V - Vacation Destination: london
W - Worst Habit: i don’t even know i have heaps of bad habits yikes
X - X-rays: i got my teeth done like 6 months ago ?
Y - Your favourite food: corn chips
Z - Zodiac Sign: virgo
tagging: @spideypooly @spideyyss @spiderwho @spiderprkers @peteypxrker @peterfuckinparker @peterspiders @peterscrewsthepooch @spiderhcllands @ecxelsior
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all I said is true :) you have me in a chokehold. Also yes the show was insane, the second they didn’t start with the bfial intro I figured all bets are off but then it just kept coming and coming. I went with a friend who does not know them very well and every song I tried telling her that this was the most insane thing they could do next.
!!! ahh! i hope at least the Hold is loving. pls i only have a loving chokehold
goddd that moment of waaait this isn't bfiafl the 1975 and then hearing // go down soft sound // must've felt like the pull back of a roller coaster; you just gotta buckle in and hold on for dear life. and gosh your friend... she's just thinking "oh, wow, the crowd is really responsive and excited for each song!" meanwhile you're just hollering like "NO NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND--"
HOW did you survive dear god. i would've blacked out after anobrain and never even made it to fsom or lostmyhead
#i hope you got a good rest after all that anon#gotta reset your brain and remember it wasn't a dream#i want to make a playlist of that setlist and just Lock In and experience it... seems WILD#like FSOM?????? i-- WHAT?#asks#answered
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how did you get into the 1975? what song is your favourite? what album do you prefer? and who is the Hottest member lmao
oooo
My friend Ryan got me into them. I just decided to give them a listen and ended up liking it. My favorite songs... that’s hard. Probably Anobrain, Loving Someone and Settle Down. That’s also really hard, especially since they have two AMAZING albums....
and that would be Matty (in my opinion anyway) like I love the George, Ross and Adam too but I’m a vocalist girl lmao
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2017.
Hi guys!
I just wanna start this blog by saying this; I do not believe in that “new year, new me” non-sense. Why’s that?
Because you can decide to change at any point of your life.
I used to have a blog, on Tumblr, on here... I don’t wanna use that one anymore, I don’t wanna go back there, I used to go on there just... Just to read my stories and those stories were.... depressing, and anxious almost. I won’t tell you what’s the name of that blog, for one simple reason; you do not need all my negative feelings on your shoulders. So let’s forget about that blog forever okay?
I’ve been thinking about writing a blog like this for a while. I love the idea of being a writer, but I DO NOT have the patience to write a book, or a movie; even though i’d like to do so. Like any musician, I write lyrics, songs, poems... But that just felt like it wasn’t enough anymore.
That’s why 2017 will be different for me. Blogging will give me the freedom of speech I need, and it helps me relax after a long week. I finally decided to change for good and that will help me get closer to the people I love.
I also like blogging because I actually feel like some people will read it and like my work, it might sound selfish, but it feels good to know somebody cares enough about me, to actually read something of mine. I’d like to post once a week, maybe twice a week if I can. I’d like to help people by simply writing. This whole blog thing is like a thank you from me to you guys for supporting your friends and family in need. Everybody needs a buddy throughout their life; i’d like to be a buddy to you guys; I just want you to take your mind off of things while you read my blog once or twice a week. It might sound stupid, but 5-10 minutes in your day, just thinking about nothing, actually helps, reading a book helps, watching youtubers talk about their lives, can also help.
Like I said, i’ve been thinking about writing a blog for a while now, not really knowing where I was going with this but I like watching youtubers a lot, especially Julien Solomita and Jenna Marbles.
Julien is so talented; he films and edits his vlogs so perfectly, he puts so much time and love into it, that’s why I watch him every morning. He is a positive, kind and funny guy, he puts a big smile on my face when he vlogs about simple things..... His life with Jenna and their 3 dogs, makes me think about who I wanna be, what I wanna do.
I would love to be a youtuber; but I just don’t think I could do it well. So that’s why i’m back to blogging.... I’d like to cheer up people with good things that are happening in my life or simply a quote I love.
So I will post a part of Julien’s vlog from today. The ending kind of just pushed me to go back to blogging. That ending will be on repeat every morning I wake up now.
All good stories need a proper beginning. So here it is; I hope you’re ready for an adventure with me.
Thank you for being here already,
here’s Julien’s end of vlog.
youtube
- anobrain
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