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altocat · 1 day

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Plz make us cry Alto

Seph and Lucrecia reunion 🥹🥹

RAISED

PART 7

Vincent settles in with the group during the brief journey to the mountains. He is confused at Sephiroth's often childlike, messy mental state but Zack explains everything, right down to the entire plot of CC up until now. Vincent gradually ingratiates himself with the group, determined to help heal Sephiroth as atonement for his sins. And now that Cloud is out of commission and Genesis has been dormant for some time, the group is confident they can safely make it to the cave in one piece.

Sephiroth is nervous, naturally. Nibelheim really reopened a lot of old wounds. He's still trying to place together how much of himself is human, an alteration under Hojo, a false memory, or part of Jenova. The idea of him coming from Jenova sickens him to his core, makes him angrier than ever about all the things Shinra did to him. Rather than turning his anger towards humanity though, Aerith continues to emotionally strengthen and encourage him, telling him that regardless of whatever answer he finds, it's up to HIM to decide who he truly wants to be. She eventually reveals what she is (she finds out during one of the early Shinra encounters) and why she feels she's beginning to truly understand her place on this planet. To pave the way to a brighter future. She and Sephiroth are relics from an ancient world. They've come into existence in order to lead the way to a NEW world, a KINDER world.

Zack, meanwhile, is still trying to figure out what role he plays in all this. What happens after they heal Sephiroth? They still have no idea where to go. And that's not even telling what's going to happen with Genesis or Cloud. How do you begin again when your world is so messed up? His relationship with Aerith is getting closer. But Zack is tired. And he's been really pushed to the brink this entire journey. More than anything, he needs time to process all the trauma he's witnessed, and in even bigger need for a bit of hope.

They arrive at the cave, Vincent leading the way as they weave through walls of crystal. Sephiroth becomes increasingly more agitated and on edge, sensing something, something that tugs at his chest, something lost, brutal, shattering. His mangled mind twists for clarity, nearly falling into full insanity again before the group manages to tug him forward, dragging him step by step. They can't turn back. They're so close now. And while Aerith and Zack don't know what's going on, they can FEEL it. It's here. It's real.

And at last, through years of agony, abandonment, loss, and confusion, Sephiroth finally finds what he's looking for.

He finds HER.

After breaking through the emotional formalities of greeting the group (and Vincent) Lucrecia reaches out to her son. She apologizes for everything, for the experiment, for her foolishness, for her absence. She shows Sephiroth everything from the very beginning, unfiltered, unrecognizable from the hellish truth he'd uncovered in Nibelheim. And as she envelops her son in ways she never could have before in life, she finally lets him know what he needed to hear--that this was never his fault. And that she loves him. And that maybe, in some small way, she can finally atone, find peace at last.

With the last of her energies as well as utilizing the full power of the Jenova cells inside her, Lucrecia embraces her son, restoring his mind to full sanity before fading away to finally rejoin the Lifestream, her suffering finally at its end. Sephiroth has little time to really feel her, clarity finally snapping into place just as he feels her receding from him. He can only watch as she leaves him for the second and final time, surrounded by his allies, finally healed and fully aware of the person he truly is.

He cannot have her. And he never will. But he knows now that he is not a weapon. He is not a mindless tool. He is not an alien or a monster or a victim to be brutalized by Shinra. He is wanted, cherished. He was sheltered, raised back to completion by people who truly care about him. And he will continue to protect them, help them find a new home and regain a new sense of purpose. After all, they brought him here. They never gave up on him. They are a testament to humanity's worth, to the life Sephiroth always wanted. He loves them. Just as he would have loved her. And he will fight for them, die for them if the situation calls for it.

He is human. He survives. And he survives with his friends, his family.

And for now, that's enough.

END OF PART 1

#asks #ff7 #ffvii #final fantasy 7 #sephcanons #crisis core #sephiroth #zack fair #vincent valentine #lucrecia crescent #aerith gainsborough #AU #longfic #RAISED

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transmutationisms · 2 days

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Care to share some Janice thesopranos takes?

well im only up to season 3 but when she was first introduced i thought she was an interesting character with obvious ulterior motives much like every single man around her and then over time it became clear to me that the writers or at least some of them were actually intending for me to view her as ceaselessly uniquely and unrepentently self-centred rude petulant greedy etc. like i watched the episode with livia's funeral last night and it's insane the entire engine of this show is that we are invested in tony's psychology and his relationship with his mother is a huge part of that and yet! janice having been mistreated and disfavoured is constantly played as like her trying to steal tony's moment or drag up petty bullshit or make everything about herself when no one else cares. honestly very irritating to me justice 4 janice i think "wronged daughter who's out for her inheritance" could have been so much more interesting if they gave her half the consideration they do every single man in tonys orbit. also for like half a season they were really leaning on her doing orientalism but they never really had anything of substance to say about or with that, it was basically just supposed to make us think she's cringe. which she is but cant we do something more interesting with that. like we get so much about how the male characters view their own ethnic identity and how it informs their sense of belonging in the world again "italian american staking personal identity on shallow idea of The East" is certainly a concept to explore but in this writers room it is just an addition to their list of reasons janice sucks

#sopranos

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donquixotehomura · 2 days

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Donquixote Doflamingo x Reader His Type

Master List

this kinda got away from me lol, it's also messy, Nsfw part warning I marked it tho no worries, the kinda trigger warnings that accompany Doffy apply but not all of them, also blood and death not Doffy or reader..... ish. as always please tell me if you find any mistakes and to address my hiatus I got sick then busy then sick again it was a rough ride lol

Feisty, headstrong, bratty, Loyal, obedient, smart, supportive, sympathetic, insane.

SFW AKA FLUFFY

He likes how loyal you are to him, how nothing and no one will make you betray him, how you’d defy the whole world for him and how you’d die for him. He likes that you’re not with him because he’s a god or king, not because of his wealth or influence, not because he’s strong or a conqueror, you love his strength yes, but you love more than just that, you love all of him.

He likes how nice you are to him, how you always listen to him and how you help him, how you don’t pity him for what happened but your reaction is just sadness because he suffered, it’s out of your pure feelings of love towards him which baffled him for a long time when he found out after he was done suspecting you had ulterior motives. It takes him a while to get used to this and accept it, especially how you encourage him to open up and that it’s not weakness to have problems and it’s part of being alive, how he can be vulnerable with you without consequences. If he just wants to talk, you’ll listen attentively and it doesn’t matter how long after if he brings it up again you’ll remember everything, if he wants feedback you’ll give him feedback and advice. He’s conflicted because you taught him it’s OK to be vulnerable and show weakness to you, that he doesn’t have to be strong the whole time, especially that he wanted to portray himself as strong for you to show he can protect you and that he’s the best, that you won’t find anyone like him, so you don’t ever leave him, you assure him you won’t ever leave and he believes you. Your love for him persists even tho you know he’s not as strong as he portrays himself, and that he has these *human* feelings, how he’s still tortured by nightmares of his past, how sleep escapes him on many nights and when he does sleep he almost always jolts awake in terror struggling to calm his heartbeat and control his breathing, how when that happens you don’t comment on it and just drag him into your arms and never acknowledge the nightmare waiting for him to do it when he’s ready, how you stop him from drowning out the terror with alcohol and give him an alternative, talking about random things asking about what he’s going to do tomorrow even tho you know his schedule or even read to him or tell him a story, but you never judge him no matter what you never look at him any less and never leave or betray him. How you still look at him with the same admiration and love you always did and even more, he questions if you’re sound of mind to be so genuinely in love with someone like him, he knows his flaws and wonders if you don’t, he asks you once and you just tell him that you know and acknowledge his flaws and you love him, flaws and all.

He realizes how much he loves you and that scared him, he avoided you for a couple of days till you basically pursued him and sat him down to talk asking if something was troubling him and if it's you, he doesn't confess outright but he makes it very clear, and he's thankful for your perceptiveness because he didn't have to say it for you to understand how he feels and how confessing won't be easy at least for a while.

In the end he hates that you're loyal and love him enough that you're willing to die for him, he doesn't want to lose you, just thinking about it puts him in pain.

NSFW

He likes his toys obedient and serving, however if you want to be more than just a toy you have to have your own sense of self and not just a mindless fool, he likes feisty and bratty, he likes his partner to have her own sense of self while still being loyal to him, he likes someone who has their own thoughts however if you always question him that’ll annoy him, there’s a delicate balance, he also likes it when you tease him and are bratty, there’s nothing he enjoys more than punishing your teasing till you’re begging for more or for him to slow down depending on which way he decided to punish you either way in the end he’ll be fucking the brat out of you till you can no longer think. His queen can be as bratty as she wants, and she gets everything she wants, however all actions have consequences, the brattier you are the more he’ll punish you, his punishments are pure blissful torture. Nothing turns him on more than seeing you be sadistic, killing enemies brutally? Turns him on, getting covered in blood in the process? Sends shivers down his spine and straight to his cock, torturing a traitor or enemy for information? He knows for a fact that you're secretly watching him and can see his straining boner especially when you throw him a knowing glance and smiling teasingly while standing over the poor soul that’s suffering, same goes for you for all the above, especially when he uses his devil fruit how the strings can be so dangerous and sharp enough to cut through anything but he has enough control that he can make them dull enough that he can use them on you without leaving a single cut or a few scratches if he wishes, licking your blood also turns him on. When you bite him during sex, that’s a privilege held by no other, he discovered he liked it when he was fucking you hard in an empty hallway in some base of an underworld dealer he was making a deal with and got bored and annoyed so during a break, he dragged you with him to an empty hallway pinned you to the wall and told you to be quiet as he quickly pulled down your pants and his fingers found your wetness you lack of panties and being already wet wasn’t lost on him, soon enough he was balls deep inside you while you muffled your moans by burying your face in his neck, his shirt jacket and coat having already been discarded at this point, he never slowed down even as you both heard voices going up and down the other hallways, as you felt yourself about to come you clung harder to him while he encouraged you and also teased you that you’ll get caught if you’re too loud, you came hard and instinctively bit down on his shoulder so hard you drew blood, the sudden unexpected feeling made him follow you emptying himself inside you, quickly realizing what you did you went to apologize but before a word left you, you heard him laughing quietly in your ear, looking at you with that usual grin was an immediate relief what he said next shocked you “so my feisty kitten likes to bite fufufufu ...I’ll keep that in mind for later tonight” he finished his sentence by kissing your red stained lips tasting his blood on them, good news is his clothes covered your handiwork and yours covered his, otherwise everyone would have known what went down a few feet away from them

#one piece x reader #one piece #donquixote doflamingo #donquixote doflamingo x reader #doffy #doflamingo x reader #doflamingo #doflamingo one piece #doflamingo fluff #op doflamingo #doflamingo donquixote

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sortasirius · 3 days

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I...have some (a whole fucking lot) of thoughts (this will be messy an hopefully I'll be more coherent later)

Firstly...that was just an insane amount of buddie content, I actually think i might rewatch both episodes tomorrow just because I feel like i missed things and I Love Angst.

Let's start with the shooting itself, beyond the fact that it was so shocking to the audience (me)...how shocking it was to Buck. How the blood splattered all over him, how they looked at each other before Eddie fell. Eddie...reaching for Buck? (I'm not sure if 'm hallucinating this or that really happened).

And then, how Buck crawled under the rig in the gunfire to get to him, drag him with him, make sure that he wasn't going to be left behind. Getting him in the rig, telling him to hold on, just hold on, hold on for me, please. The way he's left behind as Eddie is taken into the ER, how someone asks him if he's okay and he just sort of whispers "no" to himself.

Buck having to tell Chris, the way he's shaking when Taylor finds him, how he breaks down in front of Chris, how he starts sobbing, how he breaks into pieces even when he's trying so hard to hold it together.

And the clear way he wants to die, how he wishes it was him, how he tempts fate climbing that crane because he wants to die. Sure, part of it's a guilt thing, and I think some of what he said to Bobby was true (the idea that he couldn't bear to have anyone else in the house hurt, so he did it himself), but I genuinely felt like part of it was a "If I couldn't save you, I'd rather die. If you go, I go. I can't live without you, and I'll just take myself off the board, because it would be better that way."

He says some of this to Eddie, how it would have been better if he had gotten shot, and I think that's a huge part of his whole character. He's just lucky that he's so likeable because otherwise no one would ever want him. He's useless, and Eddie? To Buck, Eddie is everything. His best friend, a great father, a great person, there aren't enough words to describe what Eddie means to him. Why would he live if Eddie couldn't. the world would be better off.

And you can see Eddie want to say something about it, but he's likely (understandably) too tired and they could be interrupted so he doesn't get his chance and just has to sit with this idea that Buck thinks everyone would be better off if he died.

Then...that last conversation in the hospital, of Eddie telling Buck that he'd be Chris' guardian if something happened to him. Not his parents, not Shannon's, not their other family...Buck. Because to Chris (and to Eddie), Buck is worth more than his weight in gold. They love him both so much, he is not replaceable. The way Eddie tells him that, the force of it, like he's trying to make Buck hear it, really really hear it.

"You're not replaceable, how could you ever be replaceable? Look where you sit in our lives, how you slot comfortably in a place you always should have been."

He can't say that, but it really feels like that's what he means. It feels like there's so much left hanging in the air, unsaid, a sort of "truth we both know" situation.

I'll have more to say, I need to rewatch them both, but that was the most intense hour I've experienced in a long time, it is insane how much I have come to love each and every character in this show.

#buddie #911 #liveblog #my meta #evan buckley #eddie diaz

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just-a-queer-crow · 3 days

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Buck, Bothered and Bewildered live reaction:

Not the bachelor 😭😭😭 this reminds me of the bitchlor from Drag Race AS3

Girl,,, not the stalker,,, this is literally Milk from AS3

JOSH AND MADDIE I LOVE U 5EVER

Josh u r everything to me

So is maddie shes perfect

CHIM IS BISEXUAL IN MY HEART‼️‼️‼️

The fact that this call was supposed to happen next episode makes sm sense

Bobby ‘sassy king’ Nash im obsessed with u

Chim having his bisexual realization rn

I didnt realize wed have TWO bisexual confirmations in this episode /j

CHIMNEY MADDIE JOSH I LOVE U UR SO GOOFY

:000 hi Tommy‼️‼️‼️

Tommy is hardcore flirting :3

Tommy’s so sweet

‘Keeping my options fluid’ 🕶️🤏🤨

Jealous Buck is so silly

HARRY‼️‼️‼️‼️ i missed him last season‼️‼️‼️

Bobby what r u thinking im scared

RAVI!!!! MISSED U!!!!

Eddie and Tommy were literally on a date

LMAO RAVI I LOVE U

No becuz Tommy is so similar go Eddie girllll

Oh Buck i love u

BUCK u r so enamored with this man

Lmao Chris

Hehehehehe nerd buck star wars lover :3

‘Is it circled with a heart around it?’ I LOVE U MADDIE

The perfect woman

Harry??? Girl what???

Also in my heart Chim had a crush on Tommy when he was at the 118 after Tommy grew and learned and stuff

Chim and Hen Begins have cemented that for me

I love Hen’s glasses this season

Chim my belovedddddd!!! Fav character actually

GRIFFIN MCELROY???? WHY R U ROBBING HOUSES???? /j

Hen and Chim’s friendship is the best thing

OH NOOOOO poor lady killed her son :(((

Hen ur hand in marriage plz!!!! I dont wanna be a homewrecker but u mightve left no choice!!!!

LMAO ATHENA

Harry’s acting has gotten sm better

Oh my god buck

Im getting second hand embarassment

Hes so desparate

Also girlllll he was trying to get eddie’s attention so bad

Not the Prime ad LMAO

Im not the biggest Buddie shipper but they r so gay

Fruit central with them

Oh god

Im gonna get so much second embarrassment from this

Chim i love u so much

BUCK

Oh my god

U idiot

Hehe tommy drove him

Also Buck looks so good there

:(( i feel so bad for harry

Athena just wants to protect him tho

Such a complicated situation

Harry was so justified for punching tbat man tho

I dont like the copaganda of it all but im not expecting the most from network television

Buck reverting back to his teenage ways

He hurt himself for attention then and hurt eddie for attention (accidentally) now

BUCK AND MADDIE SIBLINGISM

I LOVE THEMMM

Need more of them being siblings

I love that theyre putting Athena in civilian clothes more

OH MY GOD

ITS TIME

FUCK

how did tommy get buck’s address ???

I love how he calls Buck Evan its so sweet

AW CHRIS‼️‼️‼️ chris loves buck sm

Them getting closer together hehehehe

TOMMY GLANCING AT BUCKS LIPS

YEAHHHHHH

buck having a bisexual crisis

HES SO OUT OF IT

Just got his whole world rocked

Tommy Kinard the man that u r

The amount of rizz he has is insane

Cant believe im caught up

AHHHHHHH

BI BUCK BI BUCK BI BUCK

#bisexual evan buckley #evan buckley #chimney han #howard han #bisexual chimney han #henrietta wilson #bobby nash #athena grant #eddie diaz #tommy kinard #911 #911 abc #911 show #911 fox #911 spoilers #911 season 7

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 2 years

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a little sketch of himb <3

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magnus-rhymes-with-swagness · 10 months

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hi yeah so to this day i’m still thinking about the direct aftermath of the betrayal. about how we still don’t know exactly what happened - maybe the movie will give us some backstory! obviously we know the long-term effects of it, but what happened directly after the button was pushed? like did ambrosius realize what he’d done at first? was there instant horror and regret the moment it happened? or did it take a moment to register that he’d blown off ballister’s arm?

and how long did it take ambrosius to realize that the worst mistake of his life had been by design, planned all along? how long before he realized it was never really his fault, but rather the director’s? was it right after he’d stood up in the arena only to find that ballister was still on the ground, or was it a slow reconciliation with the truth that stretched across years?

and about the feud/breakup itself, too - how much of it was pushed by the director and the news, and how much was it ballister himself, rightly angry that he’d been betrayed? how many times did ambrosius try to tell ballister it was an accident before it became clear ballister didn’t believe him, and how many times after that was he just repeating himself over and over? did he ever mention that he’d tried to help, that he’d seen the spreading pool of blood and tried to rush over, only to be held back? did anybody ever find out that beneath the triumphant, untouchable king’s champion was a scared and bitter young knight, forever regretting something that was out of his control from the very beginning? that the price of his victory was so, so much higher than a broken lance and an arm?

what would it feel like, i wonder, to be a golden boy on a pedestal, exalted as a hero but despised by the person who mattered most to you? to be rewarded with fame and glory and a statue in the town square for something you never even meant to do, something that ruined everything? to be celebrated for the worst thing you ever did, crowned king’s champion and gilded in the eyes of the whole kingdom but knowing their approval means nothing compared to the love of the person you’d hurt, someone you’ll probably never get back again because why would you after what you’d done? to get everything you’d ever thought you wanted, at the expense of the one person who mattered most?

#nimona #nimona comic #ambrosius goldenloin #ballister blackheart #nd stevenson #something about this stokes some insane fire in my brain. i think about it every fucking day #picture me pacing in circles with a wild look in my eyes putting it into words lmao #anyway i spend a lot of time thinking about ambrosius and i wanted to get these particular thoughts out there before the movie #and i was listening to into the woods again and thinking about how its themes of ethics and morality are kind of similar to nimona #how the line between heroes and villains and the subsequent line between good and bad is very blurry. convoluted. maybe even nonexistent #how the characters must weigh one thing - one life! - against another and decide which one is more valuable #to what lengths would you go to achieve the thing you want most in the world? what would you give up? *who* would you give up?#what happens when you get what you want more than anything and it turns out to not be what you expected but you can’t go back?#what happens when you have to choose? and what about when you don’t get the choice at all???#anyway i’ll save my other thoughts for later so this doesn’t get too rambly! [gets dragged offstage]#my words #meta #into the woods #nimona spoilers

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theminecraftbee · 2 years

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Mumbo is drifting again.

The moment he becomes aware of this, he starts to reach out. He’s not really reaching for anything in particular he’s just - reaching - reaching to stop himself from drifting more, to pull his head back on correctly. He’s - he’s scattered, he’s - he’s regretting what -

He’s Mumbo. He’s Mumbo. He’s Mumbo and he's somewhere and he’s drifting again. No, no, no, he doesn’t want to be drifting again! He wants to go home. He regrets ever coming to investigate Grian’s stupid Rift, or ever having managed to trip like a total spoon, or, or -

He reaches and pulls inwards and the drifting stops. His head grows less foggy. He is, of course, still nowhere in particular. It’s largely some color, he supposes. He’d say purple, but it isn’t quite purple, exactly; it’s like Mumbo’s started to see some entirely different color that magic is, and it’s all around him, and it’s constantly, constantly pulling him every direction.

It’s, uh.

...he’s drifting again.

Mumbo curls into himself and counts his breath as his head grows foggy and the world starts pulling at him again. No, no, no - is there any way to make this make him go home? Because, because - because drifting here, in the nowhere in particular, it’s bad, and it hurts, and it’s hard to think, sure, and he’s pretty sure he’s starting to lose days, but it’s better than when he lets go and he ends up somewhere. Because ending up somewhere is -

He pinches himself. He doesn’t want to end up - he’s ended up all sorts of somewheres. Never for very long; he doesn’t seem to be able to stay anywhere for very long and it’s never anywhere good and if he could just. Figure it out. Figure out what’s wrong. Figure out how to drift on purpose, and land outside of that stupid Rift, and maybe end up so that the Rift is outside of him again too, then maybe, but, but...

He’s drifting again and he doesn’t want to be and he doesn’t think he can keep fighting it and with something like a snapping or a tearing, he stumbles out of the place between places into the snow.

It’s cold. He’s surrounded by nothing but snow and ice, which is a problem, because Mumbo lost one of his shoes something-like-weeks ago, and his suit isn’t exactly meant to be helping him here, and, great. He’s going to get hypothermia and drift back out again. That’s fantastic. Just what he wanted!

Maybe if he just starts walking he’ll find someone. That’s worked the past few times. Of course, last time the “someone” he found was a dinosaur that proceeded to try to eat him, but he’s cold, and he still hasn’t figured out how to trigger any of this on purpose, so...

“I am pranking Grian so hard for this when I get home,” he says, like he has the past four times, and he prepares for a short miserable interlude in another world again.

#hermitcraft #mumbo jumbo #a bee fic #hey remember how last time mumbo went on hiatus we made all those insane theories about the rift?#remember that?#all kinds of wild theories about Where In-Character Is Mumbo #guys mumbo is gone until september. out-of-character he is living his best life and i respect that #in-character though...#anyway i apparently just like putting mumbo in a blender so here's some of that #theoretically in this au mumbo eventually gets a handle on this and/or gets help from people on the other side of the rift #who drag him out and he remains all rift-y #but this is more 'concept i had to get into the world' than 'au i think i'll actually write' so

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theskymahtin · 12 days

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yo WHY did I never notice that hennessy HAS A FISH SCALE TATTOO ? aka a tattoo probably very similar to the one she later gives ronan.......... i need a moment

[Image ID: photograph of a paragraph from pg 70 of Call Down the Hawk.

Transcript: She had changed since she'd left in the car. Her kinky hair was now pulled up in a ragged black topknot. She wore tinted glasses, a rabbit fur coat, a lace bralette white against her dark skin, and leather leggings that exposed a fish-scale tattoo on her lower calf. More pastel tattoos covered her knuckles, which were also smeared with paint. He still couldn't tell how old she was. She could be twenty-five. She could be seventeen.]

#finally rereading tdt can you tell #ALSO i was going to make a post about this last nighg but instead i will go on about it here on the tags of an unrelated post #like a very organized individual #i forgot that adams friends at havard were all canonically flamboyantly gay and that fletcher called ronan hot #and i am DISTRAUGHT that we didn't get more of them #i want to know more about their dynamic i want adam to come clean to them and i want them to get to know ronan better #and also meet the others #imagine a world in which they got dragged into the drama......#as if we didnt have enough characters to worry about i know #forever sad that we didnt get to see more of what adam was going through #although i know it's necessary for the narrative #maybe i should write more fanfictipn #the dreamer trilogy #call down the hawk #hennessy #mine #on the point of this post though . like . fuck i dont remember if its like laid out for us ehat the tattoo MEANS to hennessy or not #i dont have my copy of greywaren on me rn #im gonna go insane #why did hennessy get that tattoo on the first place? on a whim or is there some significance? does it have any bearing on her giving it to #ronan?#or at least a similar tattoo #going insane

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sagittariangirl27 · 2 months

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Pisces new moon tonight. 🌑♓️🦇

#synchronicity #I thought about posting here but didn't really know what #.5 seconds later I scrolled past this #I wish there was a way for me to explain the magic of this world without sounding crazy #I need proof of everything and got dragged into spirituality kicking and screaming #I have always seen myself as more of a logical person than a creative #the last few years have literally been insanity #relearning everything that I ever knew about myself #pulling it all out and picking out the good pieces #there are things I miss about myself so much #and I am grateful to get those parts back while shedding the things that never felt authentic #I have been meeting myself again a lot lately #the craziest thing to me is how fast the years fly by #i don't sleep anymore #I was doing well with that for a while #but I know all of the work I am doing will mean so much #I basically got put in speed mode in my healing journey #it's crazy to look back only months ago and feel like a whole new human being #the moral of the story is I have no idea what I am doing or what is going on #but something is guiding me #and it is the scariest coolest weirdest most terrifying thing #that's the hardest part to keep inside I think #I have to figure out what to do with all of this knowledge #and I still have no fucking idea #it's going to slap me in the face because that's how they do this shit #and then I will be like omg my whole life makes sense #this has happened more times than I can count #a lot of people wonder how the spiritual people suffer so much if they have all of this knowledge #how the fuck do you think we got that?#I have been to hell and back more times than I can count

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sexynetra · 1 month

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The way they’ve both picked each other up,,, the constant hand and arm holding from both of them,,, all the cuddling and resting their heads on each other’s shoulders,,, Grandekofi’s love language is definitely physical affection

Ough I have a 5 hour flight tomorrow time to buy WiFi and write a ficlet about them showing physical affection because you are so right actually???? The constant touching and cuddling and hand holding and carrying and kissing…. Oh it’s over for us I fear no ship will ever be them

#I’m so obsessed with them it’s insane #I think it’s time for me to do another 5+1 don’t you think #5 times they used physical touch as their love language and one time they understood what it meant or some shit #oh the brain is churning #drag race #rpdr #RuPaul’s drag race #tia kofi #La grande dame #grandekofi #uk vs the world #drag race uk vs the world #ukvtw2 #also can I just say #I love that y’all come into my inbox with your thoughts and opinions and observations #it’s so fun for me like I get to read all these fun things and scream about them and it feels like friendship even if it’s anons :)#I enjoy it my ask box is always open for this kind of stuff :))))

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bicon-crange · 7 months

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this sucks so much ass i should be able to sue and i fucking mean that

#LIKE WE ARE GOING ON WEEK THREE OF THIS TORMENT AND I HAVENT GOTTEN ANY LESS SANE #IM SERIOUS WHEN DOES THIS SHIT GO AWAY #im fucking. im erratic!!! im lightheaded my CHEST HURTS i cant BREATHE im borderline getting vertigo here this SHOULD COUNT AS A SICKNESS I #SHOULD BE ABLE TO CALL IN SICK TO SCHOOL BECAUSE OF THIS MASSIVE BULLSHIT #SORRY? ANY LESS SANE I MEANT ANY MORE SANE FFS #i talked to someone in my real actual life about this today and they were like yeah it sounds like ur going insane lol. THANKS I KNWOW #THIS IS SO CRAZY EMBARRASSING!! HEY!!! THIS IS SO CRAZY EMBARRASSING and on top of that theres no WAY this is going to work #like lets get worst case scenario here folks lets say i do talk to them and theyre like woah! hey! i like you too! :]#theres no way im not fucking stupid and dont immidiately shoot myself in the foot with it theres no FUCKING way #ugh i already know myself. i KNOW ill be like well thats a bad idea actually!!!! bc youre great and fucking. brilliant and personable and #totally gorgeous and EVERYONE likes you and theres no way in hell my dumb ass isnt just going to drag you down!!!!#theres no WAY you dont deserve better than this!! theres no POSSIBLE world where you don't have better options!!!#ugh doesnt THAT just reek of insecurity or just being a lil shyyy but i MEAN IT. I TOTALLY MEAN IT. ugh. i hate it here i hate it here i ha

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letmetellyouaboutmyfeels · 11 months

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I can now officially declare that there is in fact a plot to the Fast & Furious movies, and the plot is "group of poly overdramatic morons trip and faceplant into being international special ops, probably because they're given the jobs nobody else wants. news at eleven."

#just had a marathon watching them all for the first time and was delighted #local idiot is into adrenaline junkies #and then wonders why his wife and husband keep doing shit like jumping out of helicopters sans parachutes #I joked after the last one that when the brother is finally introduced to everyone he's going to be insanely confused #your sister's husband is married to your brother who is married to the woman who wants to kick your ass #your brother-in-law's ex-boyfriend-now-bestie got dragged into this and now has a boyfriend and girlfriend of his own #and oh yeah of your nieces and nephews one of 'em's got a different bio mom #see it's not complicated at all! now sit down and pass the BBQ #you CANNOT tell me that every spy organization in the world isn't like #look if this goes belly-up whoever was given the job will get the blame #give it to the street racing idiots I heard they robbed a place by literally towing the safe through the city #we can blame them if they fail but so far they've been weirdly lucky so why the hell not

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kinnsporsche · 2 years

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thought about kinnporsche and moulin rouge thought about “the greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return” thought about “we’re creatures of the underworld, we can’t afford to love” thought about “he loves me, and that is worth everything” thought about “he’ll fight for me” thought ab-

#kinnporsche #sorry im going insane #kinn mirroring satine's character arc fighting for porsche against his father #his father who insists they're not made for love and kinn believing him until he lets himself be loved by porsche #and then its like. yes this is it. this is worth dying for. i would rather burn the world than lose you.#until porsche gets dragged into their underworld where theres no place for him #theres no place for a man who loves with his whole heart. who holds his heart so open on a platter for kinn and trusts him with it.#proved right when porsche is threatened and kinn's whole world goes dark bcs he cant lost this. he wont.#and his father getting in his head with 'send him away. you can save him you have to send him far away from here.'#and then its 'he'll fight for me' and 'yes. unless he believes you dont love him. you have to make him believe you dont love him.'#i need to sit down immediately

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ofyorkshire · 6 months

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...oh my stars

i don't know if it was intentional, but repetitively referring to bj as "ziggy stardust" in the red riding novels completely foreshadowed bj's death.

#something something the parallels between bj and ziggy both being referenced as imperfect messiahs #and wanting to bring hope to a hellish world (bj consistently sticking his neck out to help uncover yorkshire's corruption)#but ultimately being dragged into the same hate he wanted to stop and destroying himself / being destroyed by the very people who sent him #ie - bj being threatened to send a message by the police and eventually being killed by the police (albeit *sort of* on his own terms)#also maybe something to be said about bowie retiring ziggy partially bc he got too wrapped up in the persona and questioning his sanity #sort of paralleling bj losing his mind (ironically) in the psych ward and heading off to get his revenge on laws (and ultimately jobson).#but that's probably looking way too deep into it.#this meta has almost 0 meaning in the film universe (which is closer to my canon anyway) but. ow. i have emotions.#talking about rr makes me sound insane i'm aware skdflskf but i swear it makes sense.#if there was a fandom for this series i would be popping off.#(again not encouragement to read the novels. watch the films sure. don't read he novels.)#(not unless you're just that obsessed with understanding what the heck was going on in the films like me. they're deeply disturbing.)#(but i did read them bc i DID want to know and now you guys have to live with my crazy ramblings about bj.)#(which may or may not be accurate bc peace leans *a lot* on experiences in '70s-'80s yorkshire which he was alive for. i obv was not lmao)#out of fairy tales [ooc];

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donnyclaws · 2 years

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There’s a chance I’m gonna be able to sell some zines at a zine fest soonish so I get to re-edit my drag zines typos for the thousandth time haha. Also maybe make a trans hyena symbolism zine bc I've been wanting an excuse to formalize that whole idea and research threads more

#Also found out like several more insanely transphobic actions from the show runners and rupaul so I gotta add them in #drag her drag her drag her #those being rupaul claiming that tr/nny has never been used in a derogatory context #and that when contestants wanted to speak about their transness or play trans characters they were #shut down and dissuaded bc world of wonder didn't want to field off questions about ru's transphobia #world of wonder being the company that produces drag race #anyway i might toss the final final ver on itch.io or something #for like free / pwyw i just want to start getting my little zine library together since this ones gotten so much love <3 #the tags and reception literally cheer me up daily

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