I swear this whole 'worker shortage' hysteria is actually just a ruse so that employers can justify raising their employees wages by 50c, if at all, and then pat themselves on the back for offering 'above award', meanwhile inflation eclipses wage rises and fills the boss's bank account

Hi I saw that you accept prompts and I have one in mind that has been stuck in my mind for days.. Can you write about Bedelia's parents visiting and Hannibal is her fake "husband"? HAHAHAHA I want him all playing the part too well and Bedelia being kind of awkward and grateful about it. Thank you! ❤️❤️❤️

Bedannibal Headcannons prt. 9

I LOVE this prompt, and tried so hard to make this one a drabble, but I couldn't make it flow in a way I felt made sense. So I took the base idea and turned it into this, hope thats okay!

Hannibal was not supposed to be there. Not at all. Bedelia remembers specifically telling him that his appointment was tomorrow, not today.

But here he was, minutes before her parents were set to arrive, letting himself into her home.

"You weren't answering my calls." "Do I have to answer all of your calls?" "Usually you do."

She had left her phone on silent and up in her bedroom so she didn't have to listen to every voice mail her mother would leave on the way over.

Bedelia tries to send him away, but he comments she's too tense, and her perfume is too sweet smelling, meaning she applied to much, and headed to the kitchen, following his nose to find out what in the world she was attempting to cook.

Of course, the harder she pushes for him to leave, the more he insists on fixing the chicken alfredo she was attempting.

When the doorbell inevitably rings, she doesn't go to answer it, at the second ring, Hannibal litterally pushes her towards the door and tells her not to be rude to her guests.

"Could you at least sneak out the back?" "Would you like me too?" "It would be preferable." "No."

After greeting her parents, taking their coats, pouring both a finger of whiskey; Hannibal makes his first apperance, interupting Bedelias mother from whatever comment was sitting on her tounge about her daughters home decor.

He has no hesitation introducing himself as her husband.

"Mr. and Mrs. Du Maurier. I've heard so much about you." "I'm afraid we can't say the same." "Ah, well, lets correct that then. I am Hannibal Lecter, Bedelia's husband."

Bedelias jaw is on the floor. She almost drops her glass from shock, and Hannibal is enjoying every minute of it.

"Husband? This is the first I'm hearing of any of this!" "Bedelia, how could you go and get married without telling your father an I?" "Now, now, It was a courthouse wedding, not all that long ago. The legal paperwork is still processing. I suppose our annoucement got lost in the mail."

Hannibal is masterminding the damage control while Bedelia is trying to understand what the actual hell, he just did.

Bedelia, knowing her mother, is prepared for her to pry and she has no idea what to say. Thankfully, nothing is said right away, both her mother and father were too caught up in getting to know their new 'Son-in-law'.

During dinner is when the questions finally start to come out.

"How did you two meet?" "A psychology confrence in Boston." "How long have you been seeing one another?" "A year and a half." "Is Bedelia as stubborn with you as she is us?" "Very, although I find it rather charming."

Hannibal does most of the brunt work, weaving together a convincing story that almost convinces Bedelia herself.

Once food was served, Bedelias father claims its one of the best dishes shes' ever made. Hannibal lets her take all the credit, and just comments that he's been giving her cooking lessons.

Despite being completely put off, and upset that Hannibal would distrupt her life with such a lie, Bedelia finds herself actually enjoying the night.

Usually, she is stuck listening to her mother going on and on about how she doesn't visit or call enough, how she needs to learn to decorate her home properly, how she should settle down and start a family before its too late.

And then shed listen to her father comment on her food choices, how her lawn care company has butchered her hedges, and once again tell her to call a plumber for the 'leaky' fauset in her first floor bathroom, even though its perfectly fine.

But with Hannibal taking on the conversation, she was able to eat in peace, to talk only when she wished too, despite most of the things coming from her being lies.

Once her parents finally leave, satisfied with their evening, Hannibal sticks around to help her clean up.

"You know, now I'll have to give them your phone number?" "I'm aware." "And that they'll expect us to send them a christmas card with a 'family' photo?" "I suspected such would be the case, as well as you signing 'Bedelia Lecter' instead of 'Bedelia Du Maurier' on anything your parents might see. Unless you plan to keep your maiden name?" "I'm not signing 'Bedelia Lecter' on anything."

"Why would you go through the trouble of doing all this?" "Doing what?" "Creating such a lie and feeding it to my parents as if its the truth?" Hannibal leans in close, his lips pressed to the shell of her ear. "Maybe next time you'll answer your phone."

When he leaves for the night as well, Bedelia cannot bring herself to be truley upset about anything that transpired.

Cole and Lloyd reflect on life:

So I got bored in class and decided to start writing something, this is post crystalized btw and openish ending as well:

————— “Do you ever get bored of the life we’re living now?” 

Cole looks up from his notebook, straight ahead of him Lloyd sits, gaze fixed out the window. It catches Cole off guard, he’d never been asked that question before and never thought it would come out of Lloyd’s mouth of all the people he thought would ask it. 

Cole looks back down, eyes fixed on a roughly drawn pose. “What do you mean ‘boring’? Pretty sure someone threatening to kill you doesn’t happen to your average plumber.” 

“Not that, Cole.” Lloyd lets out a sigh. Cole sees Lloyd shift positions out of the corner of his eye so he’s sitting criss cross. “But the way that we’ve been living in a loop.” 

“A loop?” 

“Yeah like after every major battle we get a break before we’re thrown out to fight again.” 

Cole looks up at Lloyd again. He hadn’t thought of it that way and in that sense, yes they had been living in a loop. A constant cycle of never ending fighting. After a while it does become boring and exhausting. 

“I guess but when we accepted being ninjas, I think we kind of agreed to that y’know?” 

Lloyd casts his glance down to Cole’s notebook. “Do you think it’ll ever stop?” 

That question catches him off guard. Cole didn’t have the answer to that or most of the questions Lloyd was asking. Truth be told Cole tried not to think about it too much, it was better to not think too much about all your missing. He found if he ended up thinking too much he fell into a loop himself, the last time he’d been in one had been years ago when he became a ghost. He shivers at the thought. 

Instead he gives Lloyd a light laugh and asks, “Where are these questions coming from? You don’t usually ask stuff like this.” 

Lloyd is quiet for a second. “I don’t know just been thinking. We’ve had a lot of free time lately I guess I’ve spent it thinking.” 

The words leave the room in uncomfortable silence. The ninja usually didn’t have free time it was either spent fighting evil or doing whatever you could before evil attacked again but now it’s been 7 months since the last attack and the biggest bad thing they’ve stopped was a bank robbery that threatened to blow the place up. The situation was handled and everyone was fine but it’s not like the police couldn’t handle it, the ninja were just bored. 

“I think it’s finally stopped Cole.” 

“What’s stopped?” 

“The fighting.” Lloyd looks up at him with an unreadable expression. “I think the overlord was it.” 

“Okay…” Cole closes his notebook, gently. “Are you upset about it?” 

Lloyd shifts position and lets out a frustrated sigh. “Yes, no, maybe? It’s just…what else is left for me?” 

The realization dawns on Cole, Lloyd’s been fighting crime half his life and that’s the good portion of it. He doesn’t know what life would be like without it. He doesn’t know where he’s supposed to go. 

“Hey, hey, we’re still going to be here just because we stop fighting crime doesn’t mean we can’t be together.” 

Lloyd looks at him, his eyes filled with tears ready to fall, his knees are pulled up to his chest. “No, you won’t. Every time we stop being ninja we have to get other jobs, we have to spilt up again.” 

 He’s not wrong. Every time the fighting stops long enough the ninja drift apart and as result have to get new jobs. However that was under the circumstances of a team mates death, first Zane and then Nya the team falls apart fast. Cole isn’t surprised Lloyd’s afraid those fall out weren’t pretty.

“It won’t be like that this time, Lloyd. Yes we might drift apart, we have to grow up a bit after every thing. I mean Jay and Nya are probably going to want to start a family eventually, when Kai lets them. Zane and PIXAL aren’t gonna want to stay in the monastery forever either. I mean while we’re at it Kai and I have thought about moving out when we’re older but we have time Lloyd. It’s not going to happen all at once and it’s not like we’re going to disappear off the face of Ninjago and never talk to you again. I won’t let it happen.” Cole places his hand comfortingly on Lloyd’s knee. “I promise.” 

“You pinky swear it?” 

Cole lets out a laugh, “Yes, I’ll even pinky swear it.” 

Lloyd gives Cole a small smile in return and lets out a small giggle, shaking his head. 

“I mean c’mon whenever you find that lucky girl or guy you’re not going to want us around in the monastery for that.”

“FSM, Cole!” 

Cole watches as Lloyd’s face flushes red and laughs with him. It’s been awhile since they had laughed like this, Cole can’t even remember the last time Lloyd and him hung out like this. 

“FSM, you’re so embarrassing.” 

“Hey, I’m just thinking long term here, it is going to happen eventually.” 

The laughter dies down and Cole sees Lloyd gaze drift down. 

“Hey, you will find someone Lloyd, I don’t know who but I’m sure you’ll find someone to match your nerd energy.” 

“Cole! What the hell stop bullying me!” 

Cole lets out a laugh with Lloyd, they both know it’s all in good spirit, the teasing, the taunting, that’s what the family does because at the end of the same they all love each other as siblings would. Well it’s really odd family but don’t look too much into. 

Cole opens up his arms for a hug and Lloyd flies in not missing a beat. Cole wraps his arms around him and Lloyd does the same. 

“Thanks Cole, you give the best hugs.” 

Cole smiles wide and hugs him tighter, “No problem Kiddo.” 

The sits in happy silence like that, the only sound being distance shouting of Jay in the background. 

“FSM, Lloyd when’s the last time you took a shower?!” 

~end~

I think Emily should’ve been in “Max Out” instead of Ken

I think Ken, Gwen’s older brother, is a character the show could’ve done a lot of interesting things with (like exploring how he’s the only grandchild of Max and Verdona who’s left out of the alien/magic loop), but it’s hard to accept that he’s supposed to be important when he’s never seen or mentioned ever again in any capacity (he’s not even in the family photo on Gwen’s desk in “What Are Little Girls Made Of?”)

As much as I like the concept of Ken, he’s entirely needless; in fact, his episode could’ve played out perfectly fine, maybe even better, without him

How?

By replacing him with Emily, Gwen’s apparent best friend since childhood

Emily is also a cool one-time character who’s, unfortunately, never mentioned again after her debut episode, but her existence and supposed importance to Gwen is easier for me to accept bc she’s not a Tennyson, so her not being brought up in casual conversation is kinda understandable (unlike Ken, who you think would’ve at least been mentioned in passing at least once prior to “Max Out”, and then occasionally throughout the franchise)

I know that Ken only exists bc the show needed a good excuse to justify Max coming out of hiding, and what’s a better excuse than to rescue your grandchild? However, I honestly think he would’ve went looking for Emily too; not only is she a civilian in need (you can’t tell me Max the heroic ex-Plumber wouldn’t have tried to save an innocent person if he could), but she’s his granddaughter’s best friend, and it’d make sense for him to want to save someone Gwen’s familiar with

So, imagine this:

Max finds out that Emily was abducted and decides to go after her himself. Meanwhile, Ben (who’s just learned the same thing) asks Kevin to help find her on Gwen’s behalf since she’s on the phone in the background (learning more about the situation from Emily’s parents)

Kevin asks if Emily’s a Tennyson too; when Ben says “no”, he questions why he should care if she’s not their family, which is when Gwen tells him she’s her best friend. And since he’s whipped for her, Kevin agrees to help them

On the drive over to her last known whereabouts, Gwen talks about her relationship with Emily, mentioning that they’re super close, but they haven’t been talking lately bc of a fight they recently had (the reason for said fight will be revealed later on). Maybe this could be when Kevin notices Ben isn’t super jazzed to be talking about Gwen’s missing friend, which is when Gwen mentions that Ben and Emily aren’t talking either bc of a date that “went poorly” (which happened before “Pier Pressure”, so he didn’t cheat on Julie or anything like that)

The interrogation scene could play out similarly to how it is in the show, except when Emily tries to claim that she doesn’t know anything, the DNAlien doesn’t believe her since “they have reason to suspect that she knows more than she’s letting on”

Fast forward to the scene where the trio saves her from the xenosite, Gwen rushes to make sure her friend’s okay, and after confirming that she’s fine, Emily swears to Gwen that she didn’t tell the DNAlien anything about them, revealing to the audience that she already knows about Ben and Gwen’s powers

Gwen then takes the opportunity to apologize to Emily, who we now learn was upset and hurt that Gwen didn’t tell her about their powers herself, as Emily had to demand answers from Gwen afterward her disastrous date with Ben (we still don’t learn what actually happened in their date in this episode, but we eventually realize she only found out bc Ben transformed in front of her and left her on top of a building). Emily, now fully comprehending just how dangerous it is for her to know their secret, forgives Gwen for the secrecy, and the two finally make up

Then they all team up to find Max, and you know damn well Gwen taught her best friend some martial arts moves for self defense, so Emily would actually hold her own in the fight against the DNAliens (think of Oracle from DC comics)

Maybe this gets Kevin to like her, mirroring how he eventually sees why everyone thinks Ken’s so cool; perhaps he wasn’t impressed by how Gwen described her in the car (thinking she was just another preppy snob), but seeing this side of her makes Kevin reevaluate his assumptions of her. And likewise, maybe seeing Kevin be a hero and caring for Gwen makes Emily change her mind about him, having previously assumed he wasn’t anything other than the town’s resident good-for-nothing bad boy

Skipping to the end of the episode, the four teens are left alone after Max’s sacrifice

It still baffles me how Gwen reacts like this after Magister Labrid died

But she (along with Ben) reacts like this after her grandpa sacrificed himself

So, I’d have Gwen fall to her knees in despair, crying over Max, while Emily pulls her into a hug and comforts her, showcasing how supportive she is of Gwen

Ben would be silently crying too, and Kevin would put his hand on Ben’s shoulder, trying to comfort him in his own way

But they’re still in the middle of a mission and he needs to act like the team leader Max wants him to be, so Ben wipes his eyes, looks out to the horizon and rallies his team in the wake of Max’s “death”, even more resolved to end what his grandpa started

Bidet attachments: to squirt or not to squirt?

Below cut for TMI

As promised, here's my thoughts on what it was like to get a bidet attachment!

There are a lot of them on the market, some much more pricey than others. Here's the one I chose, and I've been very happy with it.

What's a bidet, anyway?

A bidet is usually a separate device from the toilet. It squirts water up into your nether parts to clean them after you go to the bathroom.

A bidet attachment is a little device that gets installed in your toilet.

Ugh, isn't the water dirty?

Nope! It hooks into the pipe that goes into the toilet and takes the water from there, not from the toilet bowl. The water is as clean as the tap water in your sink.

Don't you end up overflowing the water in the toilet?

No, you only need to squirt for a second or two, which doesn't add very much water to what's in the bowl.

How does it know where to squirt?

You got me! My spouse installed it. It seems to have pre-positioned angles that just work. I have to lean forward a little to get it in the right place, which is no big deal. There's also a nozzle for my front parts, but I've never used that. Supposedly that's really helpful for pre-menopausal uterus-havers.

Isn't it cold?

I got one that doesn't hook into the sink's warm water, because my toilet is in a separate little room from my sink and it wouldn't have worked. Those warm-water kinds are available if you want to be fancy. But I've found that the cold tap water isn't shocking or upsetting! It's quite doable.

Doesn't it get on your front parts?

Sometimes there's a little collateral spray, but it's clean water so I just blot it off. It doesn't spray bad stuff from the back onto the front. This was something I was really worried about and no one talked about it!

Is it hard to install?

Well, my spouse did it? And he's not too handy. I think if you're able to turn the water off at your toilet, it's not a very big deal. We didn't need to get a plumber to do it.

Am I glad I did it?

You betcha! Boy colonoscopy prep is going to be so much easier next time. (I did half-prep this weekend, and while I did end up in horrible anal pain by the end, it still wasn't as bad as when you're wiping over and over and over and making yourself raw.) Now I'm trying out Linzess, which is lots of diarrhea, and I am again very glad I can just squirt out the bad and then have one nice clean wipe just to dry off. If all your poos are super-clean one-wipe poos, then you probably don't need this. But if you deal with a mess in the bathroom, this could make your life easier.

Got any more questions? I'm happy to try to answer!

Arkhelios University

“What are you thinking, you metal plated piece of -”

“Elaine! Screaming isn’t going to solve this. Maybe, if we all sit down and talk about this, we can still have a wedding. Lots of people get cold feet before a wedding.”

Roman tried to hold back his future mother in law, but she was surprisingly strong for an older woman. It was taking all of his strength just to keep her from launching herself at the former servo.

“You had better not do this to me when you get married,” Elaine hissed, briefly taking her focus off of Ironman to give Roman a look that sent chills down his spine. “You or Abe. I will end either one of you if you make a spectacle like this one in front of the world. I will end you both and raise Theo myself to teach him some respect.”

“That won’t happen,” Roman replied nervously, shooting a desperate glance at Ironman. “Abe and I won’t get cold feet., Trust me, we are highly motivated to get married.”

Surprisingly, you’re not the scariest person demanding a wedding from us. Somehow I don’t think the demon sovereign would be understanding if we suddenly decided to not get married.

“I told you that I didn’t want to make this a big deal, you promised me,“ Elaine continued, once again focusing her anger on Ironman. “You promised me that I wouldn’t be embarrassed! Now I have a stupid wedding arch on my front yard and no wedding. People are going to talk!”

“Elaine, are you honestly more upset about throwing a doomed party than the feelings of a paternal figure who has been in your life since you were born?” Roman asked, only to get a dismissive noise in response. “Maybe we can talk this out.”

“I can’t go through with this, it’s too much,” Ironman protested. “I thought it would be romantic to become human and then join myself to Nikolai, but it’s too much. How do I know that I even want to be with him? What if I should have fought for Oriana instead? It’s probably too late to ask her out again, right?’

“Oh for god’s sake!”

Elaine threw her hands in the air and stormed off, but not before shooting Roman another chilling glare.

Maybe I would rather take my chances with the demon sovereign after all. I might have a better chance at survival with her instead of Elaine.

“Roman, I can’t do this. Tell me what to do, I don’t know what to do.”

Roman sighed, and rubbed his aching temple.

“Look, no one has to get married today. Why don’t we all just sit down and- Theo get away from that cake or you can spend the rest of the month without your tv time!”

Roman turned around just in time to see his son trail a finger in the elegant yellow icing he’d spent all morning finishing.

“Where is your father? Why isn’t he watching you?” Roman demanded, pushing his son away from the cake and trying to smooth over the new gap in the icing with a knife.

“He’s busy,” Theo answered glumly. “Luci flushed one of Grandma’s rings down the toilet and he’s calling a plumber. Can I have cake now? Grandma said everything was ruined anyway, so we don’t need a cake anymore. That’s what she said!”

“How did Luciana get a ring? And no, you can’t have the cake!”

While Roman lectured his son, Ironman heard the doorbell ring. He was no longer programmed to answer the door when a guest arrived, but he still felt compelled to answer it all the same.

“Dad! I brought someone to meet you!”

Nickolas burst through the door with a smiling young woman at his side.

“Dad, this is Tiana, she’s my girlfriend. I met her at school. Tiana, this is my dad.”

Ironman blinked with confusion. Nickolas had never referred to him as his father, aside from the brief time Oriana had let him as a toddler who was learning to speak. He had spent more time with the boy than Abraham had spent with any of his children, but it still felt odd to usurp Abraham’s title. He felt a fatherly affection for all of Abraham’s children and grandchildren, but no one had ever made it official by addressing him as such. He had to assume that Nickolas was using the term for the benefit of the young lady beside him.

“She’s gorgeous,” Ironman finally managed to choke out, baffled by his body’s reaction to the young woman. He smiled lecherously at Tiana, making a gesture he’d seen teenagers make towards their crushes. It didn’t seem to impress her and Ironman again felt anxiety overwhelm his senses. He had only been a human for mere hours, and already he had ruined everything.

“Um, yeah, my Dad’s a little off today,” Nickolas stammered, looking around for a friendly face. “Oh, my mom is over there, she’ll want to say hello for sure.”

Nickolas waved at his mother, who declined to wave back. Her naive husband did however, so Nickolas felt safe to approach them.

“Mom, Benvolio, this is Tiana,” Nickolas said, gesturing to his date. “Tiana, this is my mother and my step father.”

Oriana looked confused to see the young man and was lost as to why he was calling her mom. Her young daughter barely did, and she saw Juliet every day. Oriana was certain that Abraham’s son was too old to address her as mom, though she had lost count of the years since he’d been taken from them. She’d never had a mother of her own, so the term felt alien to her.

“Hi Nikolai,” she quickly said, missing the disappointment in her son’s eyes as he tried to laugh off her comment.

“It’s Nickolas,” he replied, trying to hide his embarrassment from his date. “Remember Nikolai is the groom today, and I’m Nickolas, your son.”

“Oh there isn’t a groom today after all,” Oriana said pleasantly, as if they were discussing the weather and not the possible end of a relationship. “Ironman called it off. You know those Helios men and commitment. I have money on Abe running away down the aisle whenever those two decide to try a ceremony.”

“Benvolio is betting against her,” Benvolio declared with a cheerful smile. “Benvolio believes in the power of love overcoming adversity.”

“Mom, I’m a Helios, remember? Not all of us are like Dad,” Nickolas stressed, looking over his shoulder at the confused woman beside him. “Some of us love commitment.”

“Theodosius, I swear to god, if you don’t get away from that cake-”

“You can’t call me that, the demon queen said you can’t! I’m going to tell on you unless I get to lick the frosting!”

“No, I’ve been on hold for twenty minutes now, I need a plumber, and I need one before my mother does an inventory of her jewelry box. You don’t understand what she’ll do to me if she-”

“Do you know how hard it is to lead this family? Of all the pain and embarrassment that I endure daily because of my children, and the choices they make? My father would die a second time seeing how you’ve disgraced us here today. What am I going to tell people when they ask how the wedding was? What am I supposed to say?”

In all the commotion, Nickolas sank down to one knee and presented Tiana with a small box.

“Tiana, I would be the happiest guy on campus if you said that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me,” he began, trying to talk over the shouting around him. “I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Now that you’ve met my mom and dad, and you already know Nathan and Lucy and Abe, do you want to marry me and join the Helios family?”

Even against the noise of the Helios household, Nickolas heard her answer loud and clear.

“Yes.”

Hello Bestie! 💌

I Wanna About Ex!Harry And Ex!Y/n A Little More Bc No One Is Asking The Questions That Need To Answered! 🤨 🥺😤 Has He Ever Gotten Jealous Post Separation?? Y/n Comes Home From The Store Or An Errand With Hazel And She Sees H Is Waiting Outside To Take Hazel Out And She Has A Bouquet Of Flowers Given To Her?? Or He Stumbles Upon Her Old Friend From When They Would Be Mutual With And When They Catch Up He (The Guy) Mentions Something About Y/n And H Is Feeling A Little Wtf Moment? Or Vice Versa! (Y/n Feels That Way About H?)

Sorry For The Long Ask/Request Im Just Curious! Have A Good Day/Night! 🫂🥰🤝

HIIIIIIII :)))

But since you askedddd- during their separation I feel like they would get in some big fight about a guy being over or soemthing

So I think that they would both ignore each other while Harry was over but once Hazel was down for bed and they got to talking (more like arguing) he would bring something up like “your friend told me she saw you out with a guy”

And ofc that would start an argument because 1. Why does he care? And 2. What kind of shitty friend would snitch her out to her husband? Did they want to get with Harry now that they have been split up?

But Harry is so stressed because he’s thinking it’s the end of their relationship, no working it out, no talking it out anymore. And is she hooking up with this random guy? While they have still been having sex she has the audacity to find another random man to hook up with and bring into the house. That’s still his wife

And he rants on and on about how it’s only been a week, and it’s not fair to him, and he doesn’t want Hazel around some random guy

And finally y/n is like “he was here to fix the toilet because Hazel tried to flush all her bath toys. Are you happy to hear no one has visited beside a plumber? It’s none of your business in the first place.”

And then he’s all embarrassed and pissy like “you could have at least told me, I could of fixed it 😒”

But post separation like you asked

I feel like he’s so clingy No guys even have the chance to look at her

But it obviously still happens

Any time he even notices a guy checking her out he’s instantly jealous and in a shitty mood and she has to scold him bc he’s so stubborn and so annoying when it comes to stuff like that

And if they were out and she were to be stopped by a male friend he would be so upset if she sat there and talked to him while he stood like a lost puppy behind her, his wife laughing and sliming at the man while he reminded her of little inside jokes they used to have when they actually knew each other

The ride home would be so awkward after that with him gripping at the steering wheel and barely listening to her until she’s like “you can’t seriously be angry? 😒 I was being polite we were friends in high school, you asshole.”

And then he feels stupid like “yeah, I know. I just hate any man who’s ever even looked at you. You’re my wife”

“Oh, I think they know by your death grip on my hand and the dirty look you give them if their eyes linger for a second too long.”

“Yeah, sorry. You know how I am.”

“I can’t believe you’re still so jealous after all we’ve been through”

And noooo you’re perfectly fine, I appreciate little questions and concepts :)

Hello!! sorry to bother you could write a ben 10 x reader? (the reader is kidnapped by vilgax and ben has to save her, after that ben and the reader has an argument) please, i love your fics!!

Storm Before The Calm

Pairing: Pre-Established; Ben Tennyson x Reader

Warnings: None

Word Count: 3.4k words

A/N: I changed up the request a bit (I figured it shouldn't matter which villain was used here) also I was planning to have this as sort of a damsel in distress situation but after having a chat with some boys pigs I decided a self indulgant badass reader was right up my alley

Additional A/N: I have a math exam on Thursday and I cannot focus for the life of me. So, I decided to finish up one of my drafts. Now hopefully I'll be able to work like a robot for the next week, after satisfying my creative side. Also, this fic was super self indulgant.

"I trust Ben.” You did. With your entire being.

Kevin chuckled from beside you, “Yeah, try saying that without cracking the fillings in your teeth and maybe we’ll believe you.”

His words caused you to relax, only then realizing how hard your jaw was clenched in fury. Gwen sighed in disappointment and for a second you wanted to defend her cousin and your boyfriend. Until you realized that he deserved every bit of unbridled anger coming to him.

“I trust him. Doesn’t mean I’m not mad at him.”

Your hands were balled into tight fists and even though you wanted to take your eyes off the television screen and take a warm bath, you also for some reason couldn’t stop yourself from watching it.

Like you were afraid something would happen when your eyes were off the screen for even a second. Maybe you didn’t trust him.

But honestly how could you, you were currently watching your boyfriend relax in a hot tub with Jennifer Nocturne and the sight was enough to send bile up your throat.

Ben wasn’t returning any of her advances, but he wasn’t stopping her either. And the thought made you sick to your stomach. You knew Ben was faithful and you knew he would never cheat on you but watching how the Hollywood starlet continued to hang off him sent waves of jealousy through you.

Not to mention anger at the fact that he wasn’t doing anything to stop her. When he got back, you were going to wring his neck.

Trusting him was getting harder with Gwen constantly insisting that you dump him.

Honestly, you wondered how that girl even kept a relationship.

When Ben eventually came home, all the entertainment channels were still talking about the two of them and the well-known picture of Jennifer Nocturne kissing him was circulating about. Each time you looked at that image, you wanted to shoot an arrow at the TV.

As time went by, your anger slowly fizzled out. You were unable to maintain your rage at Ben, quickly getting a headache and feeling tired of trying to maintain negative emotions. Even then, you couldn't push down the uneasy feeling in your heart that seized your stomach.

You kept expecting a text message from Ben, an apology call but as the night proceeded you understood that he was having way too much fun with another woman to even think about how you must be feeling.

The thought of that made you want to go back home and crawl underneath the covers, hiding away from the rest of the world.

But Gwen was persistent and any time you tried to wiggle away from the pair of them and go home, she insisted that you stay and make sure Ben knew how upset he made you tonight.

You were more than happy to give your boyfriend the cold shoulder until he apologized rather than have to confront him. That was just how your relationship with Ben worked. Neither of you were the type to lose your tempers and yell and scream at each other.

Although you were worried what would come out of this. Would you be able to peacefully discuss your feelings and then come to some sort of conclusion civilly? Seems too good to be true honestly.

Even then you waited until Ben came home, listening to Gwen and Kevin about how you should rip the band aid off and get everything off your chest rather than ignore him for a couple of days until the two of you got bored.

Usually, the latter would work but you had an inkling that it wouldn't be the solution for this particular argument because if you didn't communicate your emotions then he would never know how you felt about it.

So, even though your stomach filled with anxiety and sadness as the hours passed, you still didn't leave, determined to talk to him about it.

Your jaw was clenched tight when he finally did come back home, utterly relaxed and even happy like he wasn't just curled up against some Hollywood starlet while his girlfriend was watching it on E!

"I'm really upset with you." You ground out when Kevin and Gwen left, not knowing how else to start the conversation.

"What for?"

You didn't reply, picking up the remote and flicking to a gossip channel, then a news channel, then an interview show and all of them had the picture of Ben Tennyson and Jennifer Nocturne locking lips.

Ben winced, "She kissed me! I didn't even return it."

You still refused to look at you, crossing your arms aggressively, "Uh huh and what was today all about?"

"It's just publicity. Jennifer thinks that it'll help with my career."

You scoffed, "What career?"

Ben's back tensed up and he turned to give you a stiff expression, "I'm a superhero. I've saved the universe a thousand times and now that I'm finally getting recognition for it, you want to be petty?"

"Petty? You think I'm being petty? Well forgive me for getting upset after watching my boyfriend curl up to some other woman in a hot tub for the last five hours!" You bit, standing up from the couch.

"It wasn't like that! Stop blowing everything out of proportion!"

"No, you stop pretending like this isn't a big deal! Ever since your secret got out you've been acting like an ass and since meeting that blonde rat it's only gone through your head more!" You shouted, clenching your hands at your sides. How could he not see your side of this?

"Well shouldn't I get to enjoy my life once in a while?! I'm the one saving the planet constantly! I'm the one with constant death threats and near death experiences every other week! Shouldn't I get some attention for it?! God knows I don't get any from you!" He yelled back and you grit your teeth.

"Don't forget that while you were out there risking your life, we were right beside you!"

"Oh, so that's what it is, you're jealous that everyone thinks of you as the sidekick!"

"That is so NOT what this is about!"

"Oh really? Because it sounds like you're jealous because you're not getting attention by mooching off of me!"

Your eyes widened in shock. Mooching? Did he seriously think that you risked your life alongside him every day to help other people and more importantly, keep him safe, for attention?

Your body trembled, outraged and you didn't say another word, leaving his house in a rush and slamming the door behind you.

You needed something to hit.

***

Your body pumped with adrenaline and anger, muscles itching to be used as you sauntered through the old and run-down factory with reckless abandon. You briefly wondered whether you should've told Gwen or Kevin you were going there but then decided against it, pride and anger too great.

Any doubts or hesitation you had disappeared when you saw Vulkanus, standing tall and broad in his metal suit. And as per usual, he had his herd of minions doing his physical labour.

"If it isn't the Plumber's sweetheart." He drawled once he noticed you. You didn't bother with the stealth, leaving the door wide open behind you and letting the sunlight seep in. If he knew what was good for him, then this would be over quick.

"Hello Vulkanus." You greeted politely and he rolled his eyes. Of all people, he knew just how misleading your innocence was.

"Where's the cavalry?"

"Just me today." You answered and for a second you were confused by your own confidence. Maybe you were taking this just a little too easy. Oh well, that was another thing you could blame your pig-headed boyfriend for.

"Well then, this is going to be easier than I thought. Hope you said goodbye to your boyfriend, sweetheart." He rasped out and the corner of your mouth twitched into a smirk. Without another word, you raised your arms, feeling the familiar heat of fire in the palm of your hand before chucking it at him.

Just as you knew he would, he sent his minions towards you first. They were embarrassingly unskilled but the problem came in numbers. They swarmed around you like ants and you felt yourself getting irritated at the clicking sound they were making.

Unfortunately for Vulkanus his make-shift factory was right beside a dam which gave you an endless supply of the elements to work with.

Summoning all the water you could manoeuvre, you pulled it into the factory, shattering the windows along with it and flooding the room. It only took a few flicks of your wrist to create a whirlpool in the centre, knocking all the workers off their feet.

You stiffened your hands, curling in your fingers and the temperature dropped, the water solidifying with each second until all of them were encased in ice. Another flick of the wrist had the path clearing between you and Vulkanus, who was still warm.

"You-You're sparing me?" He asked, confused and a dry laugh left you.

"Not at all," You sang, eyes turning dark, "I'm giving you special treatment."

Vulkanus bounded towards you, holding his mallet high and you swiftly dodged, using water on the floor to slide quickly. He crashed into the engine of one of his machines, the fuel tank exploding and spewing fowl smelling petrol onto the floor.

It floated above the level of water and began surrounding both of you.

He once again came at you, letting out a roar and you used the water to sink through the crevices of his suit, freezing it from within and you heard the satisfying sound of his suit cracking.

Just a little more strength and forcing a gust of air through the cracks had it falling apart and his frail body fell out of its metal encasing.

"You'll pay for this! You big bully!"

"Thanks for the fun time today, Vulkanus." You smiled, strutting to the door just as confidently as you came in. Even though your body was burning from the workout and you could barely breathe, you still couldn't get over the high.

Before leaving the building, you turned around to see him still glaring at you from his place on the floor.

"Oh, I should probably free your minions, right?" You commented, eyes flickering between the ones still encased in ice and the floor that was still flooded with water and petrol.

You let out a fake sigh, "I guess I'll be nice today," You winked at Vulkanus, "Thanks for the playdate, sweetheart."

His eyes widened when you blew a kiss to him, watching in fear as you ignited a flare in your palm and blew it towards him before turning around and using the wind to slam the doors behind you. When you were just a few feet away you heard the place blow apart.

Slowly, the adrenaline began melting and the blood rushing through your ears was much more audible. You were panting, tired from the exercise and the thought of calling Kevin to come and pick you up. Or maybe even Ben. You were calm enough now to have a conversation with him.

When you pulled your phone out of your pocket you felt a hand on your shoulder and spun around to meet eyes with Captain Nemesis. For a brief second you were wondering if he was here to invite you to some inane party or even to tell you that Ben was at one.

Although you hardly looked the part, you were sweating and your face was probably red and blotchy.

"Can I help you?" You asked, taking a step back, he was a little too close to you and the look in his eye freaked you out.

"As a matter of fact, you can." He said, "You see I'm arranging a little stunt for Ben Tennyson. An opportunity if you will, to showcase some of his heroism."

You rolled your eyes, turning away from him. The last thing you wanted to do was feed Ben's ego at the moment.

"With all due respect, I don't really think I'm up for a damsel in distress routine right now, Captain, I'd rather just get home. And If you take another step towards me, I'll kick you where the sun doesn't shine." You snapped and he backed off obediently, raising his hands in a form of surrender.

"That's too bad." He mused and you turned away from him, intent on walking back home or even calling a cab. Anything to get away from this creep faster.

"Too bad you don't really have a choice."

You felt his hand on your bare shoulder again but before you could even react you felt volts of electricity rush through you. You gasped painfully, feeling fire through your veins before everything started to hurt.

White burned in your vision and colours started to blur together as your eyes filled with tears. Your body crumbled, falling forward and Captain Nemesis caught you.

Right before your consciousness slipped away you heard him say something.

"For your sake, you better hope that Ben Tennyson is as great as those gossip channels make him out to be."

***

When you felt yourself regaining consciousness, you could feel your weight pulling down and also couldn't feel the ground. This had your eyes snapping open, regardless of how dizzy you were and how many dots were in your vision.

You hazily made out the venue, Nemesis Tower, before recognize the blonde woman tied up beside you. It didn't take long before you realized she was tied to the other end of the rope, suspended through mid-air just like you.

This was no doubt going to be some sort of deathly choice.

You noticed when Ben came in, turning into Ultimate Humangasaur. He looked furious, like you've never seen him before and you knew it was because Ben was certain he'd teach him a lesson today.

"Where's (Y/N)." He all but growled and your heart soared. You didn't realize how much you missed him until now, everything from before was forgotten.

"Right up there. And so is Jennifer." He replied, still smug despite the way Ben was pining him to the ground by his throat. Ben followed his gaze to meet your eyes and you took a deep breathe, bracing yourself.

A selfish part of you wanted to stay and see what Ben would do, would he save you even though Jennifer was a civilian and world famous?

Even then you figured that you shouldn't risk anyone's life for petty jealousy, so you took a deep breath, blowing it out through your mouth and watching as a gust of wind blew past, the pressure making you swing.

You swung a few feet back, letting your body fall a little before blowing again. Once you gained enough momentum, you looked up to the rope tying the two of you together and spitting fire at it, falling at an angle. You briefly heard Jennifer scream and revelled in her karma for a hot second.

On your way down, you quickly burnt off the rest of the ropes, bringing a pool of water to crystallize into a makeshift slide as you slide on your knees across the floor, just in time to catch Jennifer in your arms.

Your knees stung as they scraped across the concrete and the wind was knocked out of you when the woman fell into your form.

She gasped and her eyes that was screwed shut gently fluttered open. Up close you could understand why everyone was in love with her. Even then you couldn't spare her any concern.

You quickly pushed her out of your arms, noticing Gwen and Kevin staring at you in awe when you stood up. You cracked your knuckles, making your way over to the older man with a scowl.

"For your sake, you better hope that I'm just as weak as you think I am. Spoiler alert, I'm not."

Ben spared a small smile at you but you couldn't feel anything aside from hot fury. You felt water surge beneath your fingers and threw it at him, pulling up a wall of earth to block his blasts.

Your boyfriend immediately began fighting alongside you and your bodies fell into a familiar rhythm. Even though there was a crazed narcissist trying to kill you, you felt safe beside Ben.

It wasn't long before the four of you managed to overpower him, rendering his armour useless until he was defeated, lying pathetically on the ground.

You walked up to him and your lips twisted into an unimpressed frown when you noticed the way he had the audacity to glare at you. Without a second word, you raised your leg and kicked him right between the legs.

"I always keep my promises, Captain."

Kevin began laughing behind you and Ben cringed.

Finally, when you turned to meet Ben, now de-transformed, all the fight left your body and you relaxed. He looked apologetic and you let him approach you.

His arms wrapped around your waist and you leaned into him, breathing the familiar scent of his deodorant and snaking your arms under his jacket to fist his T-shirt.

He sighed into your hair, arms tightening around your body, "I'm sorry. For being an ass to you and saying all those horrible things, I was being an idiot and you deserve an apology."

You didn't move, not pulling away from the way your forehead was pressed against the length of his neck, "Thank you for coming to save me."

"Didn't look like you needed much help." He chuckled and you felt happy hearing the pride in his voice.

"I missed you." You murmured, holding him a little tighter and he turned his head to kiss your forehead gently. And just like that, everything was right in the world. Just as long as you were in each other's arms.

"I love you."

You heard the click of a camera and your head snapped up to see a herd of cameramen and reporters along with a couple of police cars. Ben laughed nervously beside you, "I guess we won't have to worry about another actress coming between us."

You gave him an unimpressed frown and he just smiled, leaning to peck your lips and you heard the crowd of reporters’ gasp and heard the shutters of cameras before they began shouting questions at you.

You pulled away from him when you saw Jennifer Nocturne make her way towards you. You figured she wanted to snuggle up to Ben now that the cameras were filming.

Instead, she walked right up to you, hugging you tightly and your arms flailed pathetically beside her, unsure of what to do, "You saved my life! I don't know how to thank you!"

She pulled away for just a second before pressing a kiss to your lips. Your eyes widened in alarm and the shutters began once again and flashes practically blinded you.

"Huh, so that's what that feels like." Ben murmured when she pulled away from you. Kevin was smirking beside him, satisfied that he got a taste of his own medicine and Gwen was just in shock.

Ben felt his stomach turn at the sight of Jennifer’s lipstick on your mouth and you were unsure whether you should feel repulsed or cocky.

But as you wiped the pigment off your lips and curled back into Ben's side you couldn't feel anything other than your burning muscles and your drooping eyelids.

You squinted because of the bright lights, feeling a headache grow as the exhaustion from before crept up on you again. After 2 fights and a kidnapping today, there was nothing more you wanted than a nap.

"Wanna go home?" Your ever observant boyfriend asked just as the nausea started to kick in. You nodded and he guided you away from the reporters to his car.

He gently placed you into the front seat, shielding your head as you got in to prevent you from hitting it against the hood before buckling your seatbelt, watching carefully as you drifted into a sound sleep.

Ben heard everyone behind him swoon as he lovingly placed a kiss to your knuckles and then climbed into the seat beside you, sparing you one last warm glance before starting the car and driving away.

He'd definitely notice the shy smile on your face when you saw that Ben kissing you was on the front page of a magazine.

And you'd notice the jealous scowl he'd have when he saw that Jennifer kissing you was on the front page of another.

Since I saw people talking about Ben's little big chill kids, I thought I'd finally do some headshots of my ones, who are also a part of my Ben 10 Next Gen. For me, I've always imagined that for young necrofriggians, they all start out looking the same (Beyond some size difference), but as they grow older, they'll start to develop their own patterns, small body traits and shades of colour, as showcased here. I'll share the little info on each sibling, and the basics of who they are as a person. When Ben first found them again, saving them from poachers and going full mum mode, they had been developing these different psychical traits, but not enough to identify each properly on their own, so while giving them names, Gwen used bandana pieces to colour code them, and each kid still wears theirs to this day, slightly modified. So here they are now, as full grown young adults. You can follow from left to right each row, or just the colours next to their names. -North (Black)- The largest and physically strongest of the kids, North acts as the leading member when Ben isn't around, doing their best to watch out for their siblings and be a middle ground to them. It's been this way since they were born, looking out for them and doing whatever they can to protect the others. This has resulted in North collecting quite a few scars and wing tears, though they wear them with pride, wanting to display how strong they are to others. They often looks up to Ben when it comes to being a hero, in how their mumdad protects others and the galaxy, and wants to be a fighter like him one day, often asking to train with their mumdad whenever he's around. Ben has suggested Plumber training for North, but they're still thinking about that. -Tundra (Red)- Tundra is a very curious one, and is known to wander off when things catch their interest. They prefer using experience to learn from, thus making them quick on their feet when something happens, and good at thinking logical. When the siblings are struggling with something, or come across some kind of problem, it's often Tundra who provides the quickest answers that should go well for them. That being said, due to their wandering, they gave gotten into trouble a few times and need to be saved by their siblings or Ben, as despite how smart they are, they can be a bit of a ditz when something catches their interest. -Grey (Silver)- Having a connection to the earth bellow, Grey often spends their time searching caves, and any hidden areas they can find. They especially love to research and find minerals of any kind, ranging from metals to gems, sometimes even studying their metal lunch for the day before eating it. Because of this, they can be carelessly dirty, and aren't the cleanest of people, but does pick up after themself when reminded. Grey is also pretty close with their sibling Storm, and surprising Gwen and Ben when first hearing the two call each other "Dweeb" and "Doofas", when first meeting them again. -Storm (Brown)- As someone who likes to spend a lot of time flying and high in the clouds, Storm is fascinated by the weather and how it behaves, and feeling the cold fresh air and challenging themself with flight training. This has provided them to have the most agility in the air, and knows the best ways to build up speeds, while also not draining themself. Whenever they aren't flying around, they're doing research on the weather, very keen to be a meteorologist one day. Whenever Ben visits, they will often ask him about the weather on other planets, and any adventures he's had in the sky. Storm is also pretty close with their sibling Grey, and surprising Gwen and Ben when first hearing the two call each other "Dweeb" and "Doofas", when first meeting them again. -Crystal (Blue)- Graceful on their feet, Crystal is a charming and gentle person, with a keenness for the art of dancing, especially when hovering in the air. This was something sparked in them when seeing how the patches in their wings, which are see through, glittered and reflected light through them, making Crystal often move around to see what they could get them to do, and the introduction of dancing was something they latched onto as a result. They are one of the hardest of the siblings to get angry, upset or rile up, and often goes with the flow and speaks in a slow and soft voice. Because of their kind nature and beautiful display of their wings, Crystal has attracted many others who are interested in them, many falling for them after meeting Crystal for a mere minute, though they tend to pretend not to notice, and turn down those who ask. -Orion (Orange)- Having an eye for art, Orion is a skilled painter and drawer, while also dabbling into other art forms to create things, their room filled with their works of art, and often creating gifts for others. From when they were little, Orion has always admired their auntie Gwen, and are always keen and eager to hang out with her when she visits, showing every new drawing and painting they have made while she was away. In fact their fondness for auntie Gwen is why they picked the orange bandana, as it reminded them of her hair. -Neva (Green)- Fashion focused and head strong, Neva is a keen one, who knows exactly what they like and isn't afraid to say it. They love designing things to wear, especially since fashion isn't that big on Kylmyys, and Ben brings them fabrics and items they request from earth whenever he comes by on a visit. Though, despite Neva's expensive tastes, they are most certainly aren't a snob, and more often than not create outfits and accessories for others that Neva knows they'd like, and wants to bring out the best beauty in them. Though admittedly, they can get a bit carried away if someone asks for fashion advice, or even brings up the idea of something related to it. Neva also a bit of a business mind too, having gotten some clients recently on their homeworld after seeing what Neva could make. -Raine (Aqua)- A very sweet young one, Raine has a keen eye for collecting things, particularly shiny or unknown stuff. From gemstones to simple earth utensil, if something interests them, Raine is known to take it with them, sometimes snatching without thinking. They don't mean any harm, and just sometimes think before acting, and will give something back if they've realized what they've done, but if it's clear they can keep it, then they aren't one to share, though do like to show off what they have with joy. They are also very well organized, knowing where everything they own is, and even when their siblings misplace something, having a photography memory and mental list of things. They may own a lot of stuff, but that doesn't mean they want to live in a pigsty. -Vale (Yellow)- Being one of the quiet ones, Vale likes to keep a lot to themself, and don't speak very often, only when they need to. They spend a lot of time outside, observing nature as it passes by them, using a little diary to note down what they see, hear, feel, smell and even taste. They like to appreciate silence and the world around them, and the beauty of nature, and collect little things to store away in their diary as memory. Whenever they visit earth, they love to visit the forests in the spring and summer, seeing the range of colours blooming from flowers, and has many flower prints because of this. -Lux (Beige)- Quite the basic of people, Lux likes to live life in a simple way, and tends to try and stare clear of any chaos, which is quite hard when you have 13 wild siblings. Because of them, they can come across as annoyed and frustrated at times, and can be blunt and honest, but they do love their siblings, and is often the one that says what's needed to be said. Lux also have massive wings compared to their body, a ratio none of the others have, and use to trip over their feet a lot growing up. Now, their massive wings are a great way to hide away when they're not in the mood to talk to read a book, or to hug a family member when seeing them down. -Micha (Pink)- Bubbly and sneaky, Micha has been dubbed the "Pink Ninja" for a reason, someone almost always able to hide away and sneak up on others. They love to jump scare people, and has found more and more crafty ways to get around without being noticed, even without their ability to go invisible. They love to pull jokes and get a laugh out of people, and Micha is known to have a snort with their own laughter. It's always their mission to catch Ben off guard when he visits, as each time it gets trickier due to him knowing it's coming, and his training and skills build up over the years, but Micha always finds a way in the end. -Zodiac (Gold)- Patient and often neutral toned, Zodiac is often seen to be pretty wise. From a young age, they've always loved stories from history, especially those about myths and legends they hear from around the galaxy, and spend a lot of their time reading and researching anything they hear about, always keen to hear a new story they may have never heard about before. It always fascinates them how much Ben has seen and done, and the stories he tells, Zodiac is practically fond of those about Alien X and Celestialsapians, and wants to meet one one day. -Alaska (White)- High on energy 99% of the time, Alaska is always zooming around and never has time to stop. They rarely sit still for long, and it takes a lot to drain them of their endless energy, always moving in a blink of an eye. Because of this, Alaska is the fastest of the crew, which has come in handy often. But they can be easily bored, and a little frustrating to deal with when they don't pay attention, but they do like to spend that energy by jumping around each sibling to spend the day with, and wants to engage in all of their activities to support them. -Arlo (Purple- The smallest of them, Arlo was born the runt of the group, but thanks to their siblings, especially North, they managed to survive childhood when most other necrofriggian runts would have died. This makes Arlo the baby of the group, and the one they all want to protect, even if it can be a little baring at much, wanting to prove they can be strong on their own. And Arlo somewhat got their wish, when reaching a certain age and Ben learning that one of his children had the spark, thus meaning Arlo is an Anodite, and is able to use magic, though they're far from being perfect at it, and their small body sometimes struggles to keep up. But each day Arlo practices, wanting to feel more than just the tiny one, but they are generally kind and great with emotions, being very supportive and just trying their hardest.

Finding Home ~ Chpt 8

Catch Up      Masterlist      AO3

A bang. A shriek. A pillow being thrown and missing its intended target completely. “Darcy, what the hell are you doing here?” Katherine clutched her sheet to her chest, still trying to get her breathing under control even if the look she gave her best friend could have easily killed him if looks did that sort of thing.

“I spent the night, but that’s besides the point.” He grabbed the pillow from a bewildered Jack and closed the door to Katherine’s room before sitting on his best friend’s bed. “Last night this Robin Hood character robbed me. $2,500 was donated to The Trevor Project in my name.”

“You don’t sound too upset despite your rude entrance.”

Darcy sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. “How am I supposed to be upset about that? It’s a great organization.” He flopped over with a groan, resting his head in her lap. “It’s just that much money coming out of my dad’s account wouldn’t even do any damage. Mine on the other hand, that’s my rent. I’m an editor at a small magazine, far away from The Tribune, one that could have used the talented writer, Katherine Plumber when she moved back to New York but she wanted to do things her way. I don’t have my father’s salary.”

Katherine began running her fingers through his hair. “I’m gonna figure this out, Darcy. I promise and if you need any help around the time bills start needing to be paid, I’d be more than happy to help.”

“Thanks, Kath. You know you’re the best, right?” He smiled up at her.

She returned his smile with a smirk. “So I’ve been told.”

They both laughed as Darcy sat up. “Hey, Darce. Why do you think they would have chosen this particular organization?”

Darcy shrugged as he opened her bedroom door. “Maybe because they know I started dating Romeo? You think that could lead to something?”

She hummed in thought, nodding her head. “Yeah, I do. I mean it certainly narrows down the list. Could you write me a list of who knows?”

He nodded. “Yeah, sure. It’s kind of short though.”

Katherine just grinned. “Even better.”

“Well, if it isn’t Mr. Morris.” The portly man that had been following Katherine sneered one afternoon. “Who else is up there corrupting the heiress of The World? Besides Kelly?” He was leaning against the building, arms crossed and just as vile as the day Charlie had met him.

Charlie tried his best to stand as tall as he could in the presence of the man that had tormented he and his friends for most of their life. “A Pulitzer ain’t living with us. Being inside of the system you used to work for musta really done you in. A Pulitzer in lower Manhattan. Don’t make me laugh, Snyder.”

The older man chuckled. “That’s right, she’s going by Plumber now. You didn’t answer my question though, Morris.”

He was surprised his crutch didn’t fall. Katherine was a Pulitzer? He knew she was from the Upper East Side but a Pulitzer? There was no way. He couldn’t believe it. “I don’t have to anymore. Now leave before I call the cops.” Charlie threatened, trying so hard to remain brave in front of Snyder.

“Get Miss Pulitzer to go back where she belongs and you won’t ever have to see me again.” Snyder pushed off from the wall and began to walk across the street.

Charlie didn’t stick around to watch. He went as fast as he could inside. Oh he hoped that Jack was home. They had to get Katherine out of there and fast.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, Charlie. What’re you talking about? We can’t kick Kath out. We can’t afford this place without her and I sure as hell ain’t gonna eat the breaking the lease fee.” Jack stared at his best friend, confused. He knew he had his apprehensions to their new roommate before but this was just a whole other level.

“You mean you’d rather live with a Pulitzer than pay a few hundred? I thought your show was doing well.” Charlie looked back at the man he had considered his brother for most of their lives together incredulously. Did he not remember what Pulitzer did?

“She’s not her father, Charlie. How’d you find out anyway? She finally tell you guys?”

Charlie’s eyes widened. “You knew?! You knew and you didn’t tell me?”

Jack shrugged. “That’s her story to tell. She’s changed her last name and made it very clear she wants nothing to do with him.”

“You are so far gone.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“It means that you are too blind to see that Katherine’s gonna hurt you just like Sarah. No, she’s gonna hurt you worse because at least Sarah didn’t bring around old demons.”

Jack groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “What the hell are you talking about, Charlie? And enough with the riddles. Tell me plain.”

Charlie huffed. “Pulitzer hired Warden Snyder to follow Katherine around. He knows where we live now thanks to her. So we either send her back to her old man or we have to deal with whatever consequences those two cook up.”

That name caused Jack to freeze. He didn’t know how this made him feel. The rational side to him was telling him that Katherine didn’t know and that he just needed to talk to her. The emotional side was beginning to see Charlie’s logic and was already planning on how to pack her things before she got back from work.

“Anyone here?” Katherine called out as she locked the door behind her. “I brought cupcakes from that tasting I had to go to and let me tell you, I will eat all of them if no one is here.”

The boys looked at each other. What were they going to do now? They hadn’t had time to come up with a plan on how to approach her. The one time she didn’t stay at work late of course was the day they were questioning her legitimacy. Jack took a deep breath. They just had to play it cool through the length of eating a cupcake. If they didn’t, she’d go into investigator mode to try and figure out what was wrong and they certainly didn’t want to deal with her when she was like that.

Jack patted Charlie’s shoulder as he stood from his seat in front of his easel. “Save at least two cause me and Charlie are here!” He called out, trying not to laugh as she let out an over exaggerated disappointed groan.

The cupcakes were huge and looked too pretty to be eaten. Katherine already had a cupcake in her hand. The icing was a pastel orange with a gummy orange slice placed in the middle. The cake itself looked vanilla and she was certainly loving the bite she had just taken. “It tastes just like a creamsicle, oh my god.”

“Where are these from again?” Charlie asked as he looked over the rest of the cupcakes. The cookies and creme one was calling his name.

“This new bakery that just opened up a few blocks from us actually. Which is gonna be super dangerous. The owners are super nice and honestly these are the best cupcakes I think I’ve ever had.” She explained in between mouthfuls.

“Did they switch you over to the food section?” Jack asked, grabbing the s’mores cupcake.

She shook her head. “They’re giving me different things so I don’t grow bored. Which is nice and I appreciate it but it’s still not where I want to be.”

“They still not know you’re working on modern day Robin Hood?” Charlie asked, after his bite of cupcake. Jack hadn’t started choking and deep down he knew that Katherine wouldn’t poison their food. She was a bad enough cook as it was, there was no way she’d be able to do something like that even if she could potentially be working with Snyder. The voice inside his head said he was wrong about that too but that wouldn’t stop him from his plan for this evening.

Katherine shook her head. “No, the other reporters in crime have started running stories but I don’t have anything to really add to what’s already been published.” She did have her list though and later that evening she was going out to do some of her own investigating.

Once she was finished with her cupcake, she headed to her room, fully intending on taking a nap. That was when Jack made his move. He knocked on her open door before entering her room. He closed the door behind him and leaned against it. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Tell you what?” She turned around to face him after hanging her jacket back up in her closet.

“That the man following you was Snyder.”

The confusion she felt grew even more. “Who’s Snyder? How’d you figure that out? Is he following me again?” Her eyes widened. She hadn’t seen anyone this time, hadn’t even known. Was it the same man?

“I know you’re not dumb, Katherine.” He gave her a pleading look despite his tone being anything but.

“And I know you’re not dumb, yet here you are acting like an idiot.” Katherine waved her hands about. Her curiosity was growing into frustration. She didn’t know where this all was coming from and she certainly didn’t care for how he was speaking with her.

“You really expect me to believe that you don’t know the man your father worked so closely with in law enforcement?”

She let out a huff. “Contrary to popular belief I do not know all my father did. I was either too young, too busy trying to figure out how to get out from under his thumb, or in Chicago. So no, I do not know this Snyder person. How do you know him?”

“He’s the real reason why I didn’t stick around The World. He’s been after me ever since I was a kid and your father sold me out. I’d been out of the system for years but that didn’t stop Snyder, oh no. I was tossed in a containment cell for the rest of the day. I wasn’t let out until the next morning, with a letter saying I no longer had a job.” His voice was tight, arms were crossed and somewhere along the way his eyes were no longer warm. They were now cold and closed off just like how he had become towards her. She didn’t like it.

“I was in Chicago when that happened. Remember, I didn’t even know you worked there until you told me. I’m so sorry, Jack. My father had no right to do that and neither did this Snyder.”

“And you didn’t have the right to bring the man who nearly ruined my entire life back into it!” He was acting irrational now, fear starting to control his actions.

Katherine startled as he yelled at her. Now it seemed like she had two mysteries to get to the bottom of. Jack certainly wasn’t going to be of any help for after he yelled at her, he turned around and went straight to his room, slamming the door behind him.

She stared at the door, her own anger now beginning to boil over. She couldn’t believe that he would accuse her of such things. He didn’t even listen to her or even remember all that they had shared with each other before this moment.

Then it hit her. The underlying threat that wasn’t spoken. That’s what pushed her over the edge. There was no way her father’s idiocy was going to make her leave. Just the thought of leaving caused her heart to tighten. She had wasn’t going to leave her new home. She was going to get to the bottom of this. Wait, did she just? Her eyes glistened as she closed her bedroom door and started to get ready for her mission this evening. She had found a home. This loft she shared with three others was her home. Then she thought of Jack and her heart tightened more and she was not going to dwell on those feelings. Home was a place to come back to, not a person like those cheesy romantic comedies she loved so much would have her believe.

With that thought, she grabbed her bag and marched out the front door, slamming it in determination. The sound echoed throughout the loft. Jack growled a bit. What right did she have to be angry? He flung the freshly dipped paintbrush at the canvas creating a nice splatter pattern. Now to do this for the rest of the night instead of focusing in on how he felt betrayed.

In another room, keys were clacking away as Joseph Pulitzer’s bank account was being hacked into. The computer user’s eyes widened when he saw just how much money was in there. Moving, what he considered to be, a lofty $10,000 into a donation towards Graham Windham. That would show him. If Snyder kept coming around then that number would just go up and become more frequent. Now just to figure out what to do about Katherine.

charades // ds

warning; tooth rotting fluff, language, cheesy ass shit 

summary; in which y/n thinks they’re playing an innocent game of charades, but drew has other plans 

word count; 902

i just watched zane and heath’s video of them playing charades and got an idea...

the slight twinge of alcohol coursing through y/n’s system made the scene in front of her impossibly funny. the group had been playing charades for what felt like hours at this point, and the teams continued to change when someone got upset over their teammate’s inability to keep up. 

y/n threw her head back and laughed hysterically when rudy stared at chase with confusion dripping in his features. y/n and madelyn leaned into each other, unable to suppress their laughter which only made chase angrier as rudy kept yelling, “i don’t know what the fuck you’re doing!”

“time’s up!” austin’s voice made the pair sigh heavily at another shitty round for their team. chase tugged at his hair, groaning loudly when rudy threw his hands in the air defensively. 

“firefighter, rudy!” rudy scoffed loudly, standing up to mimic chase’s previous movements to explain that there was no way for him to get that one correct. 

“whatever, i need a new teammate.” chase grumbled softly before plopping down next to maddie. 

maddie and y/n both mocked a pout, sending chase fake ‘awe’s and laughing gently when he huffed. maddie leaned into his side to try to comfort him, though her laughter made him shove her lightly. 

y/n handed her drink to maddie when it was her turn, sighing softly at the sight of drew wiggling his eyebrows at her with a wide smile. she rolled her eyes and smiled at the sight, running a hand through her hair as she stood in place. 

“don’t fuck it up, starkey.” drew rolled his eyes with a soft scoff, promising that he would do his best. 

his best wasn’t good enough. the minute ticked by with y/n acting things out, only getting three correct answers. she stared at drew with wide eyes at some of his guesses, trying to ignore maddie’s roaring laughter, though sometimes it was hard to do so. 

“drew, you suck at this game.” she grumbled softly, leaning into her boyfriend’s chest when he hugged her as an apology. 

“sorry, baby. you know i’m better at acting.” she laughed gently and tilted her head back, feeling his lips press against her softly and quickly. 

she ignored the sounds of disgust around the room, flipping the group off as she shuffled into the seat to wait for drew’s performance. the first half of the time went by in a breeze. 

water bottle 

contact lens 

cape

plumber

limbo 

but when drew started frantically pointing between himself and y/n, the girl was at a loss. he was laughing at her newfound frustration, but he kept doing the same motion, which made y/n’s competitive nature shine through. 

“couple! girlfriend! drew i don’t get it!” she was whining, while the rest of her friends were laughing at the pair. she missed the multiple phones pointed in her direction as she narrowed her gaze on her boyfriend in front of her. 

“girlfriend! i already said that!” he shook his head, laughing to himself but making no change in his actions. 

“time’s up!” she groaned at austin’s words and turned the phone around to look at what drew was trying to act out. 

“wife? drew how was i supposed to get that if i’m not-” 

a hand flew to cover her mouth as the boy in front of her knelt down, smiling brightly at her realization. the small velvet box was staring widely at her but she had a hard time tearing her gaze away from the boy himself. 

“i was hoping we could change that.” her vision blurred at the build up of tears in her eyes, her hand covering her dropped jaw as she continued to stare at the boy with wide eyes. 

“are you serious?” her hand dropped to her chest, finding it difficult to believe this was actually happening. 

“more serious than i’ve ever been in my life, baby.” he reached out for her hand, which she gave to him quickly, and pulled her onto her feet so she stood above him. “i love you more than anything else, y/n, and i want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you by my side.” 

she was full on crying now, tears running down her neck despite the wide grin on her lips. her friends were on the edge of their seats, waiting for an answer from the girl, though everyone knew what it would be. 

“y/n, will you marry me?” she started nodding quickly, watching drew’s smile reach his ears while she started laughing.

“yes, of course i will.” he slid the ring onto her finger smoothly, picking the girl up off of her feet as he stood up. 

she grabbed both sides of his face and brought their lips together, smiling at the new weight on her finger and the cheers erupting behind her. drew’s grip on her tightened just before setting her back down, but neither of their smiles faded. 

“i love you.” he whispered softly, surely not loud enough for the multiple phones to pick up on the sound. 

“i love you too.” she smiled widely and kissed him again, her mind buzzing at what just happened. 

“are we going to keep playing?” maddie hit rudy quickly, glaring at him for ruining the moment, but the couple in questioning just laughed and nodded. 

“maddie and austin, it’s your turn.”

While most of the gang seems to have moved on from Serotonin ManTM as I call Stable!Soup, I still actively vibrate at the thought of my now cherished hug doodle Liza yOU CAN’T JUST SHOW ME SOMETHING THAT CUTE AND NOT EXPECT ME TO WRITE FLUFF

(Also Lumi please accept my apologies for forcing you to ferry my submissions over to Lizaville)

There was so much I wanted to put in here but I never would have finished it that way. Anyway, here. Careful, guys. It’s Soup.

You are sitting on the couch in the living room. Neither you nor Luigi have had much to do lately, and you wonder if that has been getting to your the plumber, because he has been acting strange all day and it is concerning you just enough to upset your reading. He does not seem upset, and you cannot sense the Chaos Heart’s influence. However he is actively avoiding you, and his body language expresses that something is bothering him. He is flitting around the house performing the same four chores. He is currently reinspecting dishes he has already washed thrice this morning for any potential leftover grime, gauging by the sounds in the kitchen.

Luigi is someone you cannot even pretend to understand. He is simple on the surface yet far more complicated underneath; and just when you believe yourself to have cracked his code he reveals another several layers, each one more intricate and confusing than the last. You have become so frustrated in peeling this onion of a man that it no longer surprises you when he acts strangely.

You have been so busy pondering these thoughts and blankly staring at your page for the past five minutes that you are taken by surprise when Luigi unceremoniously plops onto the couch next to you, his weight causing you to slide backwards into his chest. You are even more surprised when he puts his arms around you and presses his face into the back of your neck, surprised into looking up and letting the book slip from your grip.

“What.”

You meant to phrase it as a question, but it ends flat like a statement. Luigi does not offer a coherent answer besides an “mmf” and noncommittal shoulder shrug. You decide to pretend to ignore him and pick your book back up.

“Lonesome today, are we?” Naturally, you end up saying something despite yourself. When Luigi answers, he mumbles into your neck and you have to suppress the shudder rising out of you at such intimate contact.

“’S not that, You’re just nice and cool.”

…Okay? You are not sure what to make of that. You are not one to complain at unprompted attention, however you believe he is clinging to you due to some sort of distress.

“What troubles you?” you ask, turning your current page. You are a little annoyed that you cannot remember most of the previous page. Luigi meanwhile sighs heavily into your neck, and you are unable to help the jolt of sensation that goes through you.

“D'you ever… think about things that should terrify you… but… but then think that maybe it would be nice under different circumstances…?”

He ends the last sentence through an embarrassed sigh, like he regrets even opening his mouth in the first place. You, meanwhile, are trying desperately to forestall the rush of blood to your face at his question. The simple answer is yes, you have. As terrifying as it is, there has always been something alluring about Luigi’s Thunderhand to you. A small part of you almost wishes to be struck by it again, to feel the intense amount of power coursing through your veins again. Not to mention your secret fascination with the idea of another fusion, impossible though it may be. And if you are honest with yourself, (which is rare) you have thought of these things more times than you would care to admit.

“No,” you answer.

When he balks behind you, you readjust your statement. “But I would not find it incredibly strange. Tell me more about your predicament.”

There is silence for a minute or two as Luigi grapples with his answer. He sounds as though he is strangling himself; for every moment he is about to talk to you he hesitates.

“Luigi,” you prompt.

He groans in mortification, sounding as though he would rather sink into the earth than tell you. His fault, for bringing whatever this is up in the first place.

“Wh–when you– The last battle back in– when we– fused…”

His voice trails off at the last word, but he still says it clearly enough for you to process it.

And you jolt in shock.

You attempt to turn and face him, but remains stubbornly buried in your neck and refuses to move. You stare off into space instead, running the words over and over again in your mind to be sure you did not mishear him.

What? W h a t? Since when has this buffoon been thinking fondly of that event? And under what circumstances would he want it to happen again?

…Not that you would be complaining about that.

Super Dimentio was a haphazardly thrown together absorption of Luigi’s soul. Rather, more accurately, you had his soul absorb yours, and your magic and concentration was the only thing that kept the fusion going for as long as it did. Which still was not very long before Luigi regained consciousness and flailed wildly to be free of the hell you had dragged him into, thus assisting in your eventual defeat. Nevertheless, it was immensely powerful, and while in that state there was no pesky cap on your magic. However, Luigi had never had a choice in the matter. That was never something you had intended.

You have never brought the topic of fusion up to Luigi. You had thought, understandably, that you were treading on thin enough ice without mention of an experience that surely scarred him. You want it more than anything in this world, but knew that it was impossible. That he would never willingly let you back in.

But… If he were to do it willingly. Perhaps the fusion could be more stable. It would still take an unreasonable amount of energy, and there is certainly a risk that the Heart will chew you up and spit you out, but now you yourself have more magic, while the Chaos Heart is weaker than it has ever been before. And you would be so intimately close to Luigi. And the magic that was sealed away would be accessible again during fusion. And the fusion would be one of unspeakable power. And now you are getting very, very curious.

And perhaps excited.

“Would you like to try it?” You ask.

Luigi scrambles out from behind you so quickly that there is suddenly nothing to lean against, and you fall backwards on the couch with a halfhearted “oof”.

He stares down at you, looking unsure whether to be horrified, or concerned that you are once again going to destroy the multiverse, or tempted, or all three at once. You merely blink at him owlishly.

“That’s not even possible,” he says, and you are one hundred percent certain that he is speaking to himself rather than you, “right?” he adds in a pleading tone.

You try and fail to suppress the upward twitch of your lip.

“Perhaps not,” you admit, “but if you are too scared to attempt it, I suppose we shall never know–”

“I’m not– I’m not scared,” Luigi grinds out haltingly, and you feel a smile find its way to your face. If there is one thing you have learned while freeloading here, it is that Luigi is very sensitive over his apparent cowardice. He will do nearly anything he is dared to do, if one phrases it in a way that annoyingly brushes against that particular nerve.

You sit up and tilt your head invitingly at him. Now that he has given you the idea, he will be extremely hard pressed to get you to stop badgering him about it. You are barely able to hold back a laugh when Luigi suddenly looks at you as though you might bite him and takes a defensive step backwards.

“Not interested, then?” You hardly have to feign disappointment, but merely cross your legs smoothly and smile in a challengingly flirtatious way. “If ever you find yourself thinking about our fusion again, my offer still stands.”

Luigi’s face colors beautifully and he stares at you a moment or two longer before abruptly jerking his body into motion, to go rewash dishes for the fourth time in the day.

For the rest of the week you badger Luigi incessantly over the idea of another fusion. For the first three days he simply ignores you, but you can tell you are getting somewhere, because by Monday he asks “Why would we do it in the first place?” which gives you enough pause for him to escape and busy himself in the basement.

Why? That is something you have not yet asked yourself. Aside from the ability to do practically anything you wish and the tantalizing idea of being so unstoppably powerful, which seems good enough reason by itself, you realize that you actually had no real goal aside from causing some general havoc in Toad Town. Is this one of those things that Luigi was trying to get you used to? Wanting something? It is strange, but your mind is willing to make a compromise between the two voices in your head, as while it is something that you want, somewhere inside you it feels more like a need.

You float down into the basement, where Luigi is tinkering with… something. He says nothing as you enter, just sighs defeatedly in preparation.

“Are you sure,” you start theatrically, “you would not like to have unfathomable power? To have a chance to once again experience fusion, but under better circumstances?”

Luigi’s face reddens and he aggressively twists a bolt with his wrench. It takes a moment for his words to come out coherently.

“A-and like I said earlier, why would we even do it?”

“As an experiment,” you start automatically, and want to send him through the roof when he rolls his eyes, “and also because we… want to. Both yourself and I.”

The words “want to” feel strange coming out of your mouth, but Luigi stops what he is doing to examine your face.

“That’s it?” He asks.

“I… yes? Aside from causing a bit of necessary mayhem,” you answer, taken off guard.

Luigi’s eyes move to the side as he chews on your words. Eventually he returns to what he is doing, but huffs, “I’ll think about it,” and your eyebrow goes up in genuinely pleased surprise.

He ignores your pestering for the rest of the day and the next two, but by Thursday he sits heavily onto the arm of the living room sofa to face you.

“Alright, look. How would we even do it?”

“Is that a yes?” you ask, trying very hard to hide any traces of triumph in your voice. You are unable to prevent some levitation, however. Luigi groans.

“It’s not an anything, I just want to know if it’s even possible. For all your badgering, this doesn’t seem like something that we could do at the snap of your fingers.”

“It is not,” you admit and cross your legs mid-air to think. “Fusion requires a base, large quantities of magic, and symmetry between the two halves. We have the base,” you gesture to his sternum, “and it is the Chaos Heart. Assuming that at the moment it is weak enough to be forced to do our bidding, it is a platform we could use. Between yourself and I, we should have enough magic to keep the fusion relatively stable.”

“Is it gonna be huge and scary looking again?” Luigi ventures timidly, and you snort.

“No. It was only so before because I was the only one holding it together, and needed it as large as possible. We will need to conserve energy this time, thus it will be of a much more reasonable size. Thirdly,” you conclude, “we ourselves need to be in agreement.” You lean in closer and look Luigi directly in the eyes, a move that clearly surprises him. “You and I must both be in agreement. The fusion will not stay stabilized if we quarrel. We will also be in each other’s minds and headspace. You will not be able to tell where you start or I end. Therefore, do not agree to this if you are unready for the consequences.”

Luigi blinks. “Wow, you… you’re actually saying that out of concern for me?”

"Of course not,” you correct crossly, “you are a ticking time bomb, and I need not have you exploding again after going through so much effort to contain you last time. It is a strategic move on my part.”

Luigi just grins at you. You want to put him through a wall, as counter-productive as that would be.

“Alright,” he says, “we know how to keep a fusion going without blowing each other up, but how would we start everything? Do we like… have to do a dance… or wear magical earings…? Whether I want to do this or not, I don’t think I’m willing to have another floro sprout planted on me.”

You had quite honestly forgotten about the floro sprout. You suppose it would explain why Luigi is so passive aggressive about having weeds in his beloved garden.

“There should be no need,” you clarify, “as you are a willing participant. However, merging souls is a tricky business. I do not have soul as my magic type, but you…”

You recall what Mimi and Nastasia had said to you, about how some of Luigi’s aura had rubbed off onto you.

“Perhaps yours could could simply re-absorb the traces of your soul left in mine?” you ask, and it takes you a moment to understand Luigi’s astonishment.

“Ah,” you clarify a bit awkwardly, “the last time we fused, some of your magic… stuck with me, so to speak.”

Luigi looks unsure about this newfound revelation, but he says nothing. In fact, he goes so quiet you begin to grow anxious.

Then finally he looks up at you and says “Alright. Let’s try it.”

You nearly shoot through the roof in your triumph.

Luigi looks over his shoulder as though expecting Merlon to be there, then slides off the armrest and comes close to you. You snort at the thought that he seems to think the two of you are committing some crime. (Quite honestly You would love to have Merlon here, if only for the sake of pissing him off) You squint with your left eye and close your right, and put your hands on his chest as he pulls you close. You reach out with your magic to try to find a weak spot in his aura, a gap that you can slip into. You are both astonished and shivering in delight when his aura floods your channels and reacts to your probing, most likely recognizing the traces of him in you. Almost before you can even react it pulls you in. Your last independent act is to use the Chaos Heart’s energy to form a body that will accommodate you both, before your mind shuts off to the sheer pleasure of things.

…

…It worked?

…It worked.

We gently run our fingers over our face. It’s Luigi, but Dimentio, but both of them and also us.

It worked.

A huge grin splits our face and a chuckle escapes.

The chuckle turns into a giggle, which turns into a round of laughter. Pretty soon we can’t stop laughing and tears run down our face, we’re rolling on the floor and feeling our face and they’re both so excited and they’re over the moon and we’re hugging ourself and we want to do somersaults and oh, oh stars above, we’re so h a p p y!

It worked!

We rush over to the bathroom mirror. Upon looking at our reflection we start laughing again, because we can hear Dimentio say through a hysteric giggle “my, what a charming fellow we’ve become!” Luigi snorts and starts laughing, and we can feel his giddiness add to Dimentio’s.

We mostly look like Luigi, but have some of the sharper features of Dimentio. It’s amazing. Our clothing has changed and blended into a mix of both and we giggle when Luigi asks “How on earth did our clothes change?”

“Wh-who cares?” we laugh giddily, stuttering over our words in excitement. “L-l-let’s go cause some mischief!”

As we throw our hand out for emphasis, the entire bathroom mirror shatters. Dimentio starts laughing hysterically as he whoops “Oh, the pure unbridled power!” while Luigi is trying and rapidly failing to keep all three of us in line.

“Hey now, we don’t want to accidentally blow the house up.”

Dimentio just laughs in response, as though that is now added to the bucket list.

“L-let’s go int-to-To-Toad Town!” we suggest excitedly. Dimentio is all for it, but Luigi hesitates.

“Oh come now, Toads are quite sturdy fellows,” Dimentio protests, his voice on the verge of a pout. Luigi sighs.

“We will punt o n e Toad.”

We giggle.

“Ju-just one? A-are you sure about that?”

Luigi gives a defeated groan, but there’s laughter in his voice.

“Well, one punt per day, at least.”

We hug ourself again and grin, before rushing to the door and kicking it open. We’re not yet used to our new power, however, and the door flies off the frame. Ducking for cover in the doorway, is Daisy.

Uhhhhh…

Oops.

Daisy looks like she’s running calculators in her head. She looks like she has a million and one questions, but after a full minute of doing nothing but stare at us all she ends up saying is, “…So whaddaya call… this?” with an emphatic gesture.

“Soup,” we respond automatically. Daisy, Luigi, and Dimentio’s confusion is palpable.

“…Soup?” they all ask in union. We shrug.

“Y-yeah. Luigi’s the meat a-a-and the greens, Dimentio’s the salt, and the Chaos Heart is the broth.”

Daisy stares at us with her mouth slightly agape.

Then she breaks down, cackling.

“It’s PERFECT!”

Before we can react, Daisy has scooped us up bridal style and totes us away. We go through Forever Forest, past Toad Town, into the woods outside of the town, and directly into…

Mario’s lap.

Oh… boy.

Mario had been sitting in a lawn chair reading a book, but now that we are simply laying in his lap he stares down at us, devoid of expression. We give an awkward smile. The awkwardness in it was all Luigi’s doing.

Mario blinks and looks up at Daisy for an explanation. So do we. Daisy practically cackles and shrugs at Mario.

“Careful,” she warns, “it’s Soup.”

Daisy leaves without another word, leaving us alone with Luigi’s brother.

Mario stares at us blankly. Then finally the gears move into place in his head, and his eyes widen in recognition. He looks unsure whether or not to be alarmed, but we recognize the gesture he commonly uses for Luigi’s name. We offer a sheepish half smile.

“Y-yeah… he’s in there.”

Mario examines us a moment longer, then inclines his head in mute consent. He pushes us off his lap and walks into his house, waving goodbye, and closes the door behind him. We chuckle.

“That could’ve gone worse.”

“Now then, back to punting a Toad?” Dimentio asks eagerly. We cheer and run into the town.

Surprisingly, there are very few villagers out today. It takes a moment for us to spot a Toad, but the instant we make eye contact with them we rush over in the blink of an eye and kick them into next week. Hearing their distressed “waaah” fade into the distance makes us laugh so hard that tears go down our face.

“Let’s set the cafe on fire!” Dimentio suggests eagerly, but Luigi shoots the idea down.

“I don’t mind a little bit of chaos, but let’s not do anything that could cause actual violence.”

Dimentio pouts for a moment but is in too good a mood to complain too much about it. We start to run back to Luigi’s cottage. We can run so fast, and we can glide over the ground. We leap into the air at full speed and skim the tops of trees, laughing giddily as we do.

As we near the cottage, Luigi says something with an exciting bite of mischief in it.

“Hey,” he says, “Why don’t we pay a visit to King Boo?”

We can feel Dimentio’s growing enthusiasm at the idea and we practically do a somersault.

It doesn’t take long at all to reach Boo’s territory, and this time we kick down the door with the intent of knocking it out of the frame. Boos turn to glare at us but scatter when we start kicking them left and right like soccer balls. It’s impossible to tell who enjoys this more, Dimentio or Luigi, and we are cackling manically. Within a few minutes we hear the voice of an irritated King Boo.

“The hell do you mean ‘Luigi is knocking boos around’? Luigi’s too chicken to even set foot in my house! And what do you mean 'he’s also Dimentio’?! What did they do, fuse together or something?”

We crash into the room via the nearest window. Boo turns to face us, and there’s shock, anger, and more than a hint of jealousy in his gaze.

“…Well, shit.”

Those are his last words before we punt him right through the wall. Boos flee left and right. We grin manically and chase after them to our heart’s content.

We start to tire upon returning to the cottage. Our moment is also a little slow, because Dimentio is busy harassing Luigi.

“Must you shoot finger guns at everyone we encounter?”

“Hey,” Luigi counters sourly, “no finger guns, no fusion.”

“C-can you guys quit arguing?” we chuckle.

We sigh and stretch. Polterpup circles us and leaps into our arms, threatening to drown us in dog kisses.

“Okay, that’s enough f- for one day.” We don’t want to unfuse, but we’re getting really tired. We try to unfuse gently, but Luigi’s aura launches them both apart like an eject seat.

You shoot across the room as Luigi’s soul practically spits you out, and do not have the energy to catch yourself in midair, so Polterpup stops your flight by jumping into your path. You land gracelessly on your ass, and a few feet away from you Luigi is dragging himself forward on his stomach. You lock eyes with him for a moment, the both of you breathing heavily and shaking.

Then you laugh.

It’s slow at first, more like an exhausted chuckle, but it grows stronger, and Luigi joins in. Before long the both of you are so wrapped up in your mirth that you are both crying, and there are no words to express what you are feeling except through hysteric, childlike laughter. Stars, it is wonderful!

You and Luigi scoot closer to each other, and Luigi hugs you when the laughter dies out. It is only then that you both realize how exhausted you are, and just how much energy the fusion took up. In fact, Luigi is already asleep on the floor next to you, pulling you into his chest, and you do not have the energy to teleport you both to the bedroom so you curl up against him and nestle your head into his shoulder. You fall asleep almost instantaneously.

It takes a several days for you and Luigi to recover fully from the fusion. As incredible as it is, it still takes a vast amount of energy from you both. Even so, you cannot help but find yourself yearning for it, and feeling cheated that you have to wait.

Nearly a week later, the two of you seem to have fully recuperated. You float around the living room, petting Polterpup and watching as Luigi scrolls through an article on his phone. Suddenly he freezes and his eye does an involuntary tic.

“Wh–” is all he manages to say.

“What is it?” you ask, curious. He turns the screen towards you so you can read.

It is a strange, poorly written news article, about some cryptid creature stalking the woods nearby Toad Town. Thus far there has only been one sighting with numerous unconfirmed witnesses, and a self proclaimed victim, a Toad claiming to have been punted straight into the sky and crash-landing into Mario’s house. Seeming to confirm this allegation is a picture of Mario helping a mildly injured Toad out of his house. In the roof of Mario’s house is a perfectly Toad shaped hole. There is also an extremely blurry photo of the alleged perpetrator, some thin, muscular figure running into the woods, with dark clothing and a long green scarf.

“It would appear we have fans,” you droll. Luigi looks as though he is having a crisis, but overlaying this is mere annoyance.

“I would bet m o n e y that Mario did this.”

He bites the inside of his cheek and looks at you.

“I was gonna ask if you wanted to try again today, but maybe we should lay low.���

You snatch the phone out of his hands and point at the article.

“Absolutely not. We are not passing up potential chaos. After all,” you add, grinning and waving the phone about, “we cannot disappoint our admirers. Are you sure we must punt only one Toad per day?”

Luigi scoffs, trying and failing to look serious.

“Fine. I’ll make it five per day. As a treat. But that’s only if you behave yourself.”

You smirk triumphantly and come close to him, preparing to fuse once again.

“…No promises.”

________________________________

I AM SCREAMING THIS IS SO HECKING CUTE OMFG

The Bunny, The Decoy and the Apex Games #6

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32034451/chapters/79916935 

Summary:

Mornings were usually uninteresting and routine for you on the drop ship. Not with Octavio and Elliott around, however.

Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5

————————————————————————–

You didn’t know when you’d fallen asleep the previous night. The last thing you could remember were the sounds of Octavio clicking away on his keyboard as he played some fast-paced parkour game.

Opening your eyes that morning, the last thing you expected to see was a head of green hair poking out from under the covers right next to you in bed but lo and behold, there it was. Out of surprise, you shouted angrily “Octavio, what the hell! I didn’t say you could sleep in my bed!” as you quickly leaped out of bed. Thankfully, you’d not changed out of your day clothes before falling asleep.

Octavio slowly and groggily sat up on the bed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he said “Where was I supposed to sleep then? I tried sleeping on the floor but it was hard and the carpet was all scratchy.” He looked up at you with bleary eyes and his short green hair sticking straight up as if he’d been electrocuted in his sleep. You couldn’t help but think that sleepy Octavio looked pretty cute, especially with the plush bunny cuddled up close to him.

You tried to push those thoughts out of your mind by focusing on the problem at hand. “Well, I don’t know. Anywhere but in my bed! I’m sure if you asked, the Syndicate would lend you a mattress or something,” you suggested, folding your arms across your chest.

Octavio thought about it for a few moments before he responded “But someone would see me carrying the mattress in here and then, they’ll wonder why we don’t want to share a bed, yknow?” You wished you could have thought of something smart to say in response but you knew Octavio was right. The other Legends would definitely suspect something.

“Fine. But they should have finished fixing that air conditioner by now so it doesn’t matter anyway,” you grumbled as you gathered up some clothes to change into before heading for the showers, leaving Octavio to fall back onto the bed for another 20 minutes of blissful sleep. When you returned, Octavio was propped up into a sitting position on the bed with pillows placed behind his back for extra comfort, typing away furiously on his phone. You sat down at your desk to do your hair and makeup and pulled out a mirror from the drawer, setting it down on the surface. When you heard Octavio throw his phone down with a small groan of annoyance, you asked “You alright, Octavio?”

Octavio picked up his phone again and swiped on its screen for a bit before offering it to you, saying “Look what one of the assholes working at the Syndicate texted me.” You hesitated before taking his phone. Most people preferred to hold their phone up for others when they wanted to show them something. Privacy reasons, you guessed. Yet, here was Octavio just unconditionally handing it to you. No warnings to not swipe to the right or anything. You felt weirdly trusted.

The text message read: ‘Unfortunately, it appears as if the plumber requires some special parts to be ordered in order to fix the air conditioner in your dormitory. The parts will unfortunately take up to 10 days to arrive. I apologize for any inconvenience caused.'

Your mouth fell open in surprise. You were going to have to share a bed with Octavio for another 10 WHOLE DAYS? You didn’t know how to react to this news. You handed Octavio back his phone, and forced a smile onto your face as you explained that you had plans to meet Ajay and Natalie for breakfast, and you would see him later. “W-Wait, Y/N!,” Octavio had begun to say but the door had already clicked shut behind you as you began making your way to the cafeteria.

The ladies of the Apex Games often got together once a week for breakfast to catch up and enjoy some much needed time with the girls. That day, the only one missing from the group was Loba who apparently had an important appointment she had to attend. Once you’d grabbed a plate of scrambled eggs and two slices of toast from the steaming hot chafing dishes, you took your usual seat between Ajay and Natalie.

You’d noticed that there was a strange silence that descended upon the group when you arrived and it suddenly came to you that this was the first ladies’ breakfast since your ‘relationship’ with Octavio went public. You mentally braced yourself for any prying questions as you tucked into your food.

Natalie was the first to break the silence. “So...Y/N, how are things going between you and Octavio?,” she asked sweetly before taking a sip from her mug of coffee. Her eyes had a little glimmer in it that told you she was hungry for any information you would offer. You could almost sense the anticipation in the air and took another bite of toast just to give yourself some time to think of an answer.

“We’re good. It’s kinda hard to keep up with him but I mean, I knew that going into it,” you said with what you hoped was a convincing shy smile. Only when you saw Ajay and Ramya’s shared eyebrow raises did you spot the possible cheeky double entendre of your words. You were just going to launch into a desperate babble to explain what you actually meant but it was probably just as well that you were suddenly interrupted by the appearance of none other than Elliott.

Elliot wore his usual charming smile as he looked around the table at everyone present, pausing for a moment when his gaze landed on you. “Good morning, ladies! You’re all looking wonderful today. Mind if the great Mirage joins you for a bit?,” Elliott asked as he put his hands on his hips, expectantly waiting for someone to invite him to sit down.

“No, Elliott. Women only today,” Renee said bluntly, not one to try and protect anyone’s feelings. Elliott held a hand up to his heart, making a face as if he had been wounded by Renee’s statement. She merely rolled her eyes as she turned to look at the other women present to see what they thought of Elliott joining their meal. Unfortunately for the ‘great Mirage’, most of them were in agreement with Renee.

Elliott laughed the rejection off and said casually “Alright, alright! You ladies need your space, I get it.” He started to walk in the direction of the cafeteria’s entrance but suddenly stopped and quickly came back to the table you were at, excitedly exclaiming “I almost forgot! I’m gonna make some pork chops for dinner tonight, anyone wanna try some?”

Everyone knew about Elliott’s famous pork chop recipe that his mom had created. It was supposedly so tender that the meat would just melt in your mouth. There was no turning down this offer, and everyone present at the table were up for a taste. Pleased at how well his offer was received, Elliott seemed to puff up in pride. He looked pointedly at you and said with a wink “Once you taste it, Y/N, you’re gonna wish you were dating me instead. I bet Octavio can’t make pork chops like I can.”

You couldn’t believe your ears. Did Elliot actually say what you thought he said or were you just starting to go insane from all the pining you did? You stared motionless from the utter shock as Elliott strutted out of the cafeteria like a delighted peacock. Ajay nudged you in the ribs with her elbow and asked with an amazed smile on her face “What was that?! Was Elliott hitting on ya? What love potion have ya got on these boys?”

“I-I’m sure it’s nothing! You know what Elliott’s like. He’s always flirting with literally anyone who’ll listen,” you laughed, waving Ajay’s suggestions away. Secretly, you wished that she was right. Maybe you really did stand a chance with Elliott. You struggled to focus for the rest of the meal and even on your walk back to your dorm, your mind was far off in the stars.

You stared blankly at the door to your dorm for a moment, wondering when on earth you’d gotten back here before turning the doorknob and opening it. Octavio was nowhere to be seen. His things were still scattered about your room and the bedsheets were a tangled mess but no green haired man. However, you spotted a mound of blankets and pillows bundled up at the foot of your bed which was suspiciously wriggling.

You approached the bundle cautiously and reached your leg out towards it to give it a gentle poke with your shoe. Immediately, Octavio popped his head out from amongst the blankets and pillows with a surprised look. “What are you doing down there? If you’re trying to make a pillow fort, that’s the wrong way to do it,” you raised an eyebrow with a confused frown.

“I was just trying to test out if this would be comfy!,” Octavio explained as he tried to hold up as many of the blankets and pillows as he could at once, dropping a few in the process. You must have still looked confused because he continued quickly “Well, you didn’t want me to sleep in your bed so I figured I’d try and make my own down here so you wouldn’t get angry at me.”

You instantly felt regret at having left so abruptly earlier that morning. What had gone through Octavio’s head to make him think that you’d get angry at him for something that he couldn’t control? So much so that he was ready to sleep on the floor like a pet dog. “Octavio, I’m sorry for getting upset at you this morning. You’re welcome to share my bed till they manage to fix that leaky air conditioner in your room, I’m not going to let you sleep on the floor like that,” you said firmly, gesturing at the blankets and pillows.

“Really?! Oh, you’re the best! Thank you, Y/N,” Octavio shouted in delight as he proceeded to leap up from the floor and onto the bed. You shook your head as you laughed at the sight. Octavio got so excited over the smallest things. After wriggling about for a few minutes on the bed, Octavio finally clambered out of bed and said “I’m hitting the practice range! Wanna come?”

You didn’t have anything else planned for the day so you agreed on the condition that he wasn’t about to try launching grenades off his jump pad again. Last time, it’d almost hit you if it wasn’t for your quick reflexes. Octavio laughed and said cheekily “Hmm, I’ll think about it. Come on, come on! Let’s get going!”

Octavio dashed out of the dormitory that you two now shared. For the time being, at least. You quickly chased after him, not wanting to left too far behind. Was this what life would be like for you now? Little did you know, there was still a lot more to come.

was trying to find some sort of commentary for forever for that post on the constuming in it, and couldn’t, but that did lead me down the rabbithole of reading old interviews in general. found this one with noxon from (i think) late season five, and enjoyed it:

 http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/buffy/interviews/noxonchat/index.shtml

among other things, i was surprised at this since i though the answer was across the board no. curious what was suggested.

Do any of the cast ever come up with storyline ideas?

Yes. For instance, yesterday, Sarah had an idea. There was something in the script she wanted to address, she had an alternate idea and we used it. So, yes.

As a general rule it doesn’t happen a lot because we are usually pretty far ahead in the process for writing and we usually have things pretty planned out. So, even if an actor comes up with a great idea, it may not fit with the season just because we’re already well ahead. Sometimes it does happen, because they’re all creative and come up with some good ideas.

which led me to look up other interviews, mostly on season 6 because i’m always curious about intent in that season. have put them all under a cut for length, but there’s interesting stuff there.

noxon on warren:

"He's an archetype because he was someone whom power corrupted and who was seeking power for the wrong reasons. Unlike Buffy or the heroes, he sought it out and then used it for evil [read: ee-vayl]." The nerds; last season's Jonathan, Warren and Andrew "were sort of the shadow side to the theme we were working with the other characters." While the show's heroes were growing up and taking responsibility, they were out there "doing crime."

from the same source, on spike:

“He sort of represents Buffy's other side. He's her id. He's hang dog because he loves Buffy, and he's not been getting his way. But in some ways I think he's the most powerful. And he's constantly struggling with his nature, which is also a part of Buffy's character arc. So, to me, he is heroic in the Buffy universe, because he's right there representing what the show's about, which is the struggle to be a hero and the other part of you that wants to drag ya on down into the abyss.”

i also looked up quotes on dead things specifically. this article has a good summary of what they were going for with spike/buffy at that point in the season. among other things, re: beating spike up she says:

I don't think anything about that is OK [...] I don't think that we were trying to say that's OK. That's definitely not offered as a conflict-resolution technique. It's part of the pathology of their relationship. [...] I've said to you and other people that the relationship is basically something we thought would reflect the kinds of relationships you choose when you're choosing the wrong person. People have been very upset about that. They're like, 'He's not the wrong person. He's all redeemed.' Part of what needs to happen at this point is to show that redemption is possible for Spike, but he's not redeemed now, and their relationship is really based on things that are not healthy. It doesn't mean that things won't get better for them, but what it's based on right now isn't healthy. It's not showing Buffy in the greatest light, but our intention was to show that they need to change what it's about, or it's never going to last. [...] This is bringing out a desperation in her, and she's going to have to deal with that.

stephen deknight also on season six spike/buffy:

I know a lot of fans have commented on the Buffy/Spike inconsistencies, but for me they really don't exist. Buffy's feelings for Spike have been plotted specifically to be all over the map. She's back from the dead, she's hurting, she's confused. Not just about Spike, but about everything.

and from another interview with him, on season six in general:

This season has been much much darker, sexual and violent. Which is the story we decided we wanted to tell. Buffy comes back to life our whole point was not to cheapen that. To make it really hard for her. That it wasn't gonna be your just standard tv, she's back, its ok, it's fine. And she feels like she can't talk to her friends. Because one, deep down, you know they don't want to hear it because they brought her back.

and on the dark willow arc, interesting how far in advance it was planned:

Yes this is, I mean this story has been building since the beginning of season five. I believe it was season five, when Willow is on the beach starting a fire and...[...] and blows up out of grill I mean...no specifically [...] That was before I was on the show. So I mean not specifically killing Tara but this whole Willow arc has been planned for like two and a half years.

also found some of jane espenson’s comments on the season.

re: flooded:

The events in Flooded imply that you and/or Doug have had problems with plumbers or bank managers. Is this the case?

[...] That really came much more from just a notion of what Buffy is going through this season. We wanted to take her out of heaven and put her in the most horrific and yet prosaic of situations, just the business of day-to-day life. 

i like that this was how she was writing anya:

Do you think Buffy should charge for slaying, or is that a bad idea?

Generally when Anya makes an argument, I try to make it absolutely as logical and plausible and reasonable as it can be, because I don't think she's crazy.

i like this on writing without giles being there, because the aimlessness definitely comes through and i also think it really works:

With less Giles this season, are you finding it hard to write for the group, now missing that father figure?

Giles left this year, and at first it was hard for all of us. When you get into a big scene, a big Magic Box scene of assigning who's going to investigate this thing, I kept hitting those lines where I'd go, "This would be the line where Giles would say, 'Everybody focus'", and he wasn't there.

For a couple of episodes I felt the absence really acutely. But then you just sort of go "Okay", you get used to the new dynamic, you get to him not being there and you stop thinking that way. It becomes easier and easier to write without him.

The interesting thing [is that] this exactly mirrors what our characters are going through. Our characters, for the first several episodes that he was gone, would actually comment, "Gosh, I missed Giles".

[It's] that feeling of, "Where's the grown up that's going to tell us to start working? Oh my god, we are the grown ups!" [It's] exactly what we wanted to capture. We wanted this to be the year where they sort of realise, "Oh, we're adults now", and all the adult problems that they're dealing with this year are part of that aspect of the show right now. So Giles leaving just worked perfectly.

that’s all i got for now!

daddy katsuki

Katsuki is naturally a workaholic. In his day offs, he still insists to be in-call and responds immediately to any reports near around his neighborhood. His partner’s not particularly fond about his habit, he sometimes forget they do have two daughters and he leaves without letting them know. That caused a minor emergency family meeting. Katsuki apologized by making them a very rare, special dinner. His daughters were really impressed of his cooking skills, his partner usually cooks for them so Katsuki didn’t really have enough chances to showcase his remarkable talents expect for being the current number two hero. And a good plumber. Not very good, he exploded the toilet two times. His eldest was not really happy as her room was next to the restroom.

For now that they’re expected to be staying at home in this time of pandemic, crime rates are unsurprisingly still present, but the police are advancing their security hundred more times and some pro heroes are taking shifts by pair to patrol each night around the city. Katsuki only has one shift every Tuesday from four in the afternoon until ten. He’s getting the hang of it, he’s spending lots of time with his family and learning more about them each day. There was one time, he was praised by his daughters (who are already grown up, how the fuck did that happen) that he’s improving and that they plenty appreciate his effort. Katsuki cannot stop smiling every time it crosses his mind.

Deku and Shouto often visits and his daughters love them so much. They always cling on to them and Katsuki threatened to kick Todoroki off the building if he give money to his daughters without him knowing ever again. Todoroki swiftly announced they’ll be having a mini party at his place for Christmas and Katsuki bellowed at him, saying that he’d rather stay at home than have his family possibly catch the virus from attending his party. His daughters didn’t really liked the tone of his voice.

That’s why now, Katsuki’s all bored after finishing God-knows how many episodes of Kitchen Nightmares in YouTube for the past week. He decided to practice the dishes he’ll make for Christmas because he’ll prove to Todoroki how much he doesn’t want to attend his mini Christmas party and get COVID-19 and also he wants him to be away from his daughters because they’re his.

Call Katsuki possessive, because he is.

It’s late afternoon, Katsuki is preparing the ingredients he ordered online the day before on the dining table. He put on a tank top he wore this morning and tied the strings of the orange apron behind his back. He silently cursed of how hideous it looks but it’s their only apron, he can worry for something else.

Katsuki puts his phone in a stand and places it in front of him. He scrolls in his notes and review the recipe again. He’s making Chocolate and Lime Mousse. Now, Katsuki never made this nor eaten this before, but he saw Gordon Ramsay made this with his daughter and thought he’ll give it a try since it looked pretty doable and his eldest daughter loves fruits and desserts.

Speaking of the devil, Katsuki heard quick and heavy footsteps down the stairs and of course he knows who it is.

“Satsuki!” Katsuki shouts, his voice echoes to the whole floor.

His eldest daughter, Satsuki (16), dressed in dolphin shorts and oversized shirt halts in her steps and turns around to the direction of the kitchen.

“Yeah, Dad?” She answers, slowly making her way to him. “Whatcha’ doin?”

Katsuki looks at her. “Practicing Christmas desserts, you wanna join me?”

“You were really serious about that.” Satsuki’s eyebrows furrowed. 

“Of course I am. I am a man of my words.” The girl snorted. “Will you help me or not?”

“Fine, I don’t have anything to do anyway. I was going to crash in the couch anyway.”

“Fantastic. Go get the white chocolate in the fridge then.” Katsuki said, eyes back on his phone and he occasionally scans the things in front of him to make sure he got everything right and present.

Soon Katsuki is heating up double cream in a pot and Satsuki is breaking the white chocolate in pieces just like her dad told her to. It’s comfortably quiet as they work on their own. Satsuki’s humming under her breathe and shoved the last piece in her mouth, squealing in delight. She gave the bowl of chocolate to her dad who thanked her under his breathe.

“What’s your favorite chocolate? White? Milk? Dark?” Katsuki asked Satsuki who’s leaning on the counter and watched the cream simmer.

“Uhm...” She hummed. “I love milk chocolate with nuts. Only with nuts.”

“But you’re allergic with nuts.”

“I honestly don’t mind.” Satsuki looked down at her arms where scattered marks of her allergies are standing out of her pale skin. Actually, she does. It’s just that everything with nuts are delicious. 

Cough.

“What’s yours then?” She asked.

Katsuki’s arm stopped, he looks up for a second then shrugs. “I like anything, but dark’s pretty good.”

Satsuki’s nose crinkled. “It’s bitter.”

“I drink expresso straight from the glass.” Katsuki snickered at her and he removes the pot from the heat and Satsuki watches him pour it in the bowl of chocolates. “Look at that.”

Satsuki switched places to have a better look. Her mouth slowly opens in awe as she watched the white chocolate melt with the piping hot cream. Katsuki glances at her and he smirks, putting the pot away in the sink. He caught Satsuki dipping her finger in the bowl and licks the chocolate happily. 

“Oi! No fingers!” Katsuki snarls, making his daughter laugh. “Don’t put that finger again or else, Satsuki.”

“Gods, it was just a bit. You’re overreacting.” Satsuki snorts at him and Katsuki gives her a daring look, before attacking her soft spots on her sides and Satsuki trips down on the floor squealing her lungs out.

Five minutes after that, Katsuki brings out a tray of eggs from the fridge.

“Now, you have to separate the white from the yolk in the eggs.” Katsuki said and he proceeds to crack one egg, sliding the yolk to the other piece and letting the white part slide down to a ceramic bowl. Satsuki does the same, and they repeated that part until they separated six yolks from the egg whites.

Katsuki fishes out a whisk and handed it to Satsuki. The girl eyed him suspiciously.

“Obviously you need to whisk it.” Katsuki said in a ‘duh’ tone and rolled his eyes.

Satsuki hesitatingly takes the whisk and shoves it in the bowl. “You’re just making me do everything here.”

“I cracked some eggs and made the mousse, excuse me.” Katsuki crossed his arms on his chest and huffed. Satsuki shakes her head. “We’re going to take turns. I’ll go after you. Thirty seconds only.”

Satsuki grunted in acknowledgement and she continues to whisk the egg whites quickly to let it foam, and she has been at it for fifteen seconds now. Satsuki momentarily pauses, rests her already sore arm and regains her breathe.

“What the hell.” She cursed under her breathe and heard Katsuki snicker behind her.

“Ten seconds left.”

Satsuki increases the speed and squealed when the bowl almost slipped out of her grip.

“You can stop, I’ll take it here.”

Satsuki sighed and thanked him then Katsuki flashed a blinding grin at her while holding an electric whisk proudly in the air.

“What the heck?! ” Satsuki screeches, Katsuki’s grin only grow wider as he plugs it in the socket and laughed out loud. “That’s cheating! How could you?!”

“How could I? I don’t know what you’re saying, darling.” Katsuki said in a teasing tone. He turned the electric whisk on, it made a loud sound and Satsuki screamed at him.

“I’m out of here, dad.” Satsuki raised her hands in dismissal, walking out of the kitchen. “It’s over.”

“Satsuki!” Katsuki calls out, he bends backward slightly and bursts out laughing again. “Get your ass back in here!”

Of course, Satsuki walks back in. Complaining.

“You can’t do that to me!” She cries. “Thirty seconds?! This fucking weakling of a whisk? And you’re using that machine?!”

“Because -”

“I was staring to feel competitive!” Satsuki cuts him off and Katsuki pressed his lips together to stifle his laugh. “My arm is limp!”

“Because it’s the best way to whip egg whites!”

“Then why didn’t you give me that in the first place?!” Satsuki falls on the floor and pouts at him. The sight made Katsuki coo and he pouts at her back playfully but ends up laughing again. Satsuki slaps his calve and Katsuki released a girly screech.

“Cheater!”

“Oi, shut up!” Katsuki’s head whips around the room. “Someone might take that the wrong way!”

“You’re a dirty player, dad.”

“Stop with that now, Satsuki. Come pour the sugar carefully in the bowl now.”

Eventually, Satsuki stands up and do what he said. Though there’s a disappointed frown on her face and Katsuki can’t help but to chuckle fondly at her. He stops the machine and placed them on the side. 

He leans over and put a hand behind Satsuki’s head, pressing a kiss on her temple and Satsuki’s frown deepens. Alright, he’s starting to feel bad now.

Katsuki sighs and crouches to her height, but the girl avoided eye contact.

“Come on now, you’re that really upset, are you?” Katsuki said softly.

Satsuki doesn’t answer.

“I’m sorry, baby. Daddy’s sorry. Can you help daddy now? We’re almost done though. I promise I’ll give you more chocolates after this.” Katsuki pulls her in his chest and wraps his arms around her shoulder, swaying their bodies sideways. He feels her grunt on his chest and Katsuki cracked a smile.

He pulls away, crouching down again but this time Satsuki meets his eyes. Her eyes, just like his -- bright, shining rubies but hers are glassy and moist. Katsuki’s heart breaks and he pouts playfully at her while Satsuki’s lower lip trembles.

“You can forget about it and help me instead. Daddy’s gonna be nicer now.”

“Don’t call yourself that, it’s weird.” Satsuki sniffles but she waits for Katsuki to finish folding the foamed egg whites.

Katsuki smiles to himself. What a time to be fucking alive, indeed. (Ironically, the world’s in chaos.) He could never ask for anything else. He’s happy but this is a different kind of happy, you know? This is more than achieving the number one spot - this is more than just being the fucking number one hero, it is something phenomenal he’s never felt before and it’s getting better every day he realizes more of the life he has now.

_______________________________________________

aight i might’ve binged watch all of gordon ramsay’s youtube and facebook videos in two nights straight do i need help

btw this was a quick, soft katsuki headcanon ha i just cant help thinking if katsuki’s gonna be a chef, he’s gordon ramsay u can’t tell me otherwise

hope u enjoyed :)

Squids, Dancing, and Dirty thoughts... Not necessarily in that order or all at once.

Apparently people like this? I am more confused than Liam is in this chapter. Which you know, makes sense bc this character only exists in my head, but also doesn’t at all bc I have no idea what goes on in there most of the time. Anyway this is for Zayn, Oxford commas, @stanmedusa who pointed out Zayn was also an Oxford comma stan, @redyellowberry, and their anon to started this mess. Also please imagine Zayn with his current blue hair, but also with his long Aladdin hair bc that’s what I’ve been doing and oh holy gods do I need that to happen. Please. Hair gods make it happen I’m begging

Same warnings as ever its 4AM, this is much longer than planned, and I have no interest in editing, making it sound coherent, or good. No, I don’t know about the squids either.

Parts 1&2 here

Liam would like to point out while he's not a stranger to feeling confused, he's still having trouble pinpointing how exactly he got to be Dance Mistress Irina Alinova's personal bitch. 

Ever since he accidentally interrupted one of the dance practises while looking for a missing prop for Director Corden, more and more of them started disappearing only to show up in the basement. No one else was interested in facing the Dance Mistresses' wrath, but Liam didn't mind the yelling. As long as Mistress Alinova didn't start throwing things, he figured he was safe enough. After all, it gave him the chance to see the blue haired ballerino again.  

Zayn Malik, the god in mortal form, the prima ballerino, the prettiest man Liam had ever seen, who had no idea who Liam even was. 

Liam had it bad. 

Liam had it so bad.

Liam had it so bad he tripped over thin air, spilled hot coffee over himself, and walked into a door when he thought he saw him at a Costas with Louis. The man he saw wasn't Zayn, thank fuck, but the entire sequence of events did give Louis more ammunition to tease him with. Stupid pretty boys with long blue hair and piercings sent from hell just to ruin Liam's life. Yeah, he was a goner. 

Louis dragged out the whole sorry story after Liam texted him about spiking his lunch and laughed himself sick knowing just how much of a mess Liam became around people he was interested in. They still didn't talk about Danielle. Which was a good thing considering the end of that relationship had Liam pretty much swearing off women for the rest of his life. No pussy was worth that mess. Dick though? Liam was willing to take that chance on Zayn, even if asking Harry didn't give him much information. 

According to Harry, Zayn had been around for a few years but mostly kept to himself or the other dancers. There was something about him throwing a fit a few weeks before Liam showed up. Upset about being forced to learn the choreography for Winston's show when it was just going to fail on opening night like it always did. 

Liam thought he had a point, considering. He didn't know what bananas, ballet, and really bad rapping had to do with King James VI but didn't want to voice that in front of the man playing the gay king. No one dared fire Zayn, considering he kept the whole theatre afloat, but it also didn't make many actors happy with him. Especially not Mizz Wendy Williams, who played Marie Antoinette in the play. Again, Liam had a lot of questions he didn't dare ask out loud. It's not like he was ever good at history, so it was entirely possible the two lived in the same time period. Or it was some sort of allegory that went over his head like the aristocrats wearing banana suits did. 

Louis always found his stories about his placement hilarious, but even that one had him wondering if there wasn't some sort of gas leak in their apartment. It wouldn't have been the first time, or the second. Most likely, it was the theatre that was growing some sort of mold that caused insanity if breathed in. Some of the things Liam had been forced to clean in the past few weeks were unspeakable. 

But even that probably couldn't explain Zayn Malik. Nothing could explain that sort of beauty and talent. Or those hands... and thighs... and fingers. Ung. Liam would love to get up close and personal with all of him.  

Either way, Liam had just been cleaning the mirrors in the practice room, humming along to Brandy and Monica on the radio, wondering if Niall was actually going to come down and help him instead of hiding away like a coward. Again. By the second verse, he'd given up trying not to sing along, not expecting anyone to come by. It was late, the dancer's practise long over, and Winston left screaming over an hour ago. Liam would have done a recce and skipped out on the last half hour if one of the managers wasn't sticking around still. Piers Morgan, an absolute cunt who treated the lads on probation like hardened criminals, and he was the prison warden. Despite, you know, most of the lads on summary probation, and Liam’s arson charge being the most serious crime out of all of them. 

Anyway, the last thing he's expecting is for anyone to come in while he's singing about the boy being his, rolling his body to the beat. Which is probably how he ends up tripping over himself when he notices Zayn leaning up against the open door, watching him. Watching him, in bright, tight, teal dance tights (were dance tights usually blue? They should be) that looked nice with his hair and complimented the gold tones of his skin. The skin he could see a lot of. Because he was shirtless. Because he was shirtless and had a lot more tattoos than Liam realized. Tattoos Liam wanted to bite. Not hard enough to make a mark or anything, that would be sacrilegious, but enough to make him make a sound. God, Liam hoped he was a moaner. Not that he thought he had a chance with Zayn or anything, but it would be a shame if Zayn was the type that stayed quiet during sex. 

Except he wasn't being quiet now, he was talking. And Liam was staring at him, like an idiot, not paying attention. Because he was an idiot. 

Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, why did this always happen to him? 

"Er, what?" Liam asked, desperately hoping he didn't sound as stupid as he felt right then, which was pretty fucking stupid. He probably looked even stupider than he felt and ruined his chances at ever-

"I asked if you were almost done? Was planning on practising more tonight," Zayn answered him. 

Zayn, Zayn Fucking Malik, answered him, and he was still staring at him like an idiot. Shit Liam say something.

"Pretty" 

Not that you idiot.

"What?" Zayn asked, looking confused and adorable.

Oh god, he was precious. Was that a smile? Was he smiling at him? Liam? Oh no.

"Pretty much, I meant. Pretty much done," Liam replied, wishing the ground would swallow him whole. "Just one more mirror, and I'll be out of your way."

There, those were words, sentences even. Now all he had to do was act normal and finish cleaning. Easy. 

"So, Brandy and Monica, right? You like R'n'B then?" Zayn asked him, walking into the room with a heavy dance bag, setting it off to the side.

Liam felt himself flushing as he turned back around to finish cleaning the mirror so Zayn wouldn't see.  "Yeah," he answered, trying not to peek at Zayn bending over as he rifled through his belongings. 

Those legs, Fuck. Liam wondered what it'd feel like to have them around his- 

"I didn't expect that," Zayn said, drawing Liam out of his filthy thoughts, and making him turn back around.

"What?"

"No, I- I didn't mean it in a bad way or anything. I guess I just expected you to listen to more rock?" 

Liam was pretty sure he missed half of the conversation somewhere. Was Zayn blushing? He was so pretty. Wow. 

"No, I like everything," he replied dumbly. They were still talking about music, right? That would make sense. Why was Zayn talking to him again? God, Liam couldn't handle this. "Do you like it? The music, I mean."

"Yeah, grew up listening to ‘em. My older sister was obsessed with Monica. So... Who's your favourite artist?" 

"Artist? Oh uh, I've been listening to a lot of Post Malone? How about you? What do you- who do you listen to?" 

"Post Malone's sick, mate. I like most music I guess, but I've been listening to a lot of The Weekend."

"Have you heard his new album?"

"Yeah, it's sick! Do you-" Zayn was cut off by Niall running in out of breath. The bright orange tee that labelled him as one of the community service workers was wet and stained black. Actually.. all of him was soaked and stained black. Was that ink?

"Hey, Payno, are you done yet because we have a situation upstairs," Niall gasped out, hands on his knees, looking like he'd just seen his life flash before his eyes. 

"What the hell happened to you?" 

"There's a squid stick in the toilet." 

"There's a what?"

"A Squid! A giant fucking squid in the toilet!" 

Liam blinked in confusion, trying to wrap his head around why there would be a squid anywhere near the theatre let alone one of the toilets. Did Corden want live animals in his show now? Or Winston. It could be either of them. 

"Why do you need me?" he asked. "I don't know anything about squids."

Niall sounded like he was at the end of his rope when he replied, "You know something about plumbing at least!" 

"Not a lot! Enough to keep the water on at home, but I'm not a plumber." 

"Doesn't matter, we need your help, Ashtons gone to find some butter," Niall said, stomping back around, leaving behind a trail of watery black ink. "We'll meet you upstairs when you're done."

"Wait, what do you need butter for?!" Liam called after him but didn't get a reply. Butter? How was butter going to help?

A muffled giggle distracted Liam from his thoughts, and he was abruptly reminded Zayn was still in the room. Zayn, might as well be a god, was in the room, and Liam was just talking about squids in toilets.

Why him?

"I guess I should go see what they need help with?" Liam tried to say without sounding... Well, he wasn't sure what the proper response was in this situation or how to react to it. 

Zayn smiled at him, and oh. How was it possible he looked even more attractive now? 

Liam thinks Zayn said something about the other lads needing him and it sounding urgent, but really, Liam was in a daze until he also got a face full of ink... From another squid in an entirely different toilet. 

What the fuck.

Louis was never going to let him live this down. 

Really? Squids???