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motheatenscarf · 5 months

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Amidst all the James Somerton fallout, I think it's important to remember not to moralize whether or not you or others fell for his grift.

Obviously, if you were rallied into being one of his attack dogs on social media when he put some pretty heinous hits out on people, uh. You might have other problems and should probably evaluate how you spend your time online and how you treat other people before you start caring about the rest of the points I'm about to make. Priorities, etc.

But for the rest of us, it's surprisingly easy to miss just how awful a creator can be.

If you only watched his videos that caught your interest, if you don't really follow creators on social media, if you skip livestreams because watching Some Guy talk unfiltered into a bad camera angle with shitty lighting for hours on end sounds like a fucking nightmare to you, you're not really gonna catch most of this shit. At least, you're not gonna catch most of it from any perspective but the one he tries to spin.

This is a reminder to be skeptical and to trust your gut and check sources if something sounds wrong, but also. Uh. That's still the creator's responsibility not to plagiarize and to fact check their work. You're not morally obligated to be as thorough in curating your experience as someone who is making sure they take every ethical precaution before absolutely destroying a "creator's" credibility in a video like H-Bomb's or Todd in the Shadows'. You're literally just some guy. Most people, myself included, watch these videos as background noise while doing at minimum one other task, you're not gonna google every damn thing he says, especially not on media analysis, where the POINT is to have one's own opinion. THEY'RE the ones trying to be "influencers," or, laughably, "creators." The standards are on them.

And for the isms, phobias, and misogyny, well. Frankly, for my own perspective, I gaslight myself all the damn time when I see red flags. Good Allyship™ has been telling me for years to ignore my own discomfort when someone criticizes a privileged group, especially one I'm a part of. I'm a cis asexual white-passing and probably neuroatypical woman, I am constantly trying to be aware of my own relative privilege while simultaneously doubting my own reaction to things. Despite this, I'd still liked to think I'm a skeptical person, but nobody's immune to everything. Everybody has weak spots.

If you got duped or fell for James' scam, that sucks. I feel ya. I fell for it too, I've seen probably 40% of his catalog over the last couple years and really liked what I'd seen. I recommended his channel and videos to people even if I didn't always agree with every point he made, but it felt important to at least consider what to me seemed like a unique perspective that had value or added to a conversation. There are red flags within his content, his analysis, his rate of publishing, his weird diatribes, that in retrospect, really all added up into things I should have known better than to ignore. But, for reasons I'm interrogating and am adding to my list of things to be aware of about myself, I didn't ignore them, and got grifted. I donated to his patreon a few times, probably gave him like $20 grand total over the years, about as much as I've given H Bomb. The important take away here isn't to be ashamed of the fact that you were fooled, it's to remember that you're fallible.

And it's good to recognize that about yourself. Everyone is, and the ones who say they aren't are lying. They're either gonna be the next person to feel really stupid and foolish when they fall for a scam, or are themselves the grifter.

No one is immune.

#James Somerton

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swanqueendaughter · 10 days

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911 BUDDIE THOUGHTS

So after the last episode of 911, I need to speak out:

1. I'm so sick of people who write that using buddie scenes to promote an episode is the norm of media production, not queerbaiting. Of course, Buddie's fandom is the most numerous, it can be seen from any social networks and comments, so this step is quite dirty, but of course effective for promotion.

2. I've been watching this series for the last 7 years since season 1, but I wasn't buddie shipper until season 7. I mean, I caught a certain vibe in seasons 2-3, but only 7.04 made me consider this pairing seriously. The whole episode was literally saturated with Buck's jealousy of Eddie. And no, fans of Buck and Tommy relationship, we're not delulu. Buck literally tells Maddie when they have lunch at the call center that he was jealous and wanted to get EDDIE's attention. However, in the last scene, he really tells Tommy that he wanted to get his attention, which of course does not fit into my brain, but the kiss and the arc of bi-Buck really distract my attention from this mess. I would also like to highlight the scene in the gym where Tommy wasn't even there and the scene where Buck pushes Eddie on the basketball court. Can you imagine that Buck, our sweet kind-hearted Buck, is pushing his best friend for the guy's attention? No way. What I see is an incredibly jealous friend who is seething with indignation that Eddie is trying to replace him in his opinion. And the scene with Tommy, where he assures Buck that no one is going to replace him, especially since Christopher wouldn't allow it? The whole arc comes down to the fact that no matter how selfish it is, Buck wants to occupy all areas of Eddie's life (his free time hanging out as best friends, being part of his family with Christopher and being number 1 for his child).

I mean, this whole arc has only two readings - the first is Buck, who is not aware of his feelings for Eddie, being burdened by his heterosexual role and their friendship, chooses to turn his attention to a more accessible option - Tommy, who has a similar background and interests with Eddie. The second is, of course, buddy's queerboating, writers/producers might well have no desire to lose some of the conservative audience by making Eddie queer character. So in this matter, maybe Oliver/Buck was just lucky to pull out a successful plot straw (I mean, at least for media PR), while Ryan/Eddie (who originally should have had a love line with Tommy) got an unenviable plot with Marisol.

3.I can't help but speak out about this absurd Eddie/Marisol arc. I mean, it hardly seems to be successful in any way, not even for buddie's shippers. This is literally Cap saying that love can be met by chance, implying his relationship with Athena. Eddie listens to him and, as if trying to copy this scenario, "falls in love" with the first girl he sees. It's absurd.

4.Eddie definitely has a problem with relationships with girls. There is a clear feeling that he chooses them relative to their qualities, and not the special bond they share. He married Shannon because she got pregnant, and the opinion of religious parents played a role. Over time, Eddie could love the idea of their small family, because Shannon was a good woman, but she was not Eddie's partner, so as soon as the first difficulties arose, Eddie ran away, instead of somehow solving the problem, and then Shannon ran away. Sad.

Eddie and Shannon's attempt to rekindle their relationship was doomed from the very beginning, and I think when Shannon realized the dysfunctionality of their marriage, she asked for a divorce. Thanks Shannon!

Anna was just another girl who met Eddie's criteria, an ideal potential wife and mother for Christopher, but who did not have an emotional connection with him. And although the screenwriters tried to fool us with a picture of the perfect happy couple, albeit slightly unsettled Eddie, as a result it turned out that he did not develop the slightest feelings for Anna. I mean, he had a panic attack at the thought of Anna as his wife!! What a shame!

5.I understand that some people have been watching the show for so long that they start to forget the plot of the first seasons of the series. However, I advise you to review the flashbacks with Tommy in order to form an opinion about him not as Buck's love interest. but behind the beautiful picture there is a completely faded and indifferent character to the fate of the team members. His evolution after he changed jobs and came out of the closet is pretty ridiculous. Yes, I see a handsome, confident man who has done just one good deed so far. But I still have no idea where this evolution comes from. Does coming out make you a different person? Doubtful. Lou is a wonderful actor, but I don't share Tommies's admiration as a character. He's cool and confident, but there doesn't seem to be anything behind that facade.

6. Buck and Tommy. The sexual energy between the characters, which is useful for creating spectacular passionate kisses and perhaps something more, is undeniable. I like to see Buck exploring his sexuality. But as for the emotional component? An absolute hopeless abyss. The scene with the costumes for the bachelor party was quite revealing. Is it possible to fill it with a decent emotional component? With the good work of the screenwriters, yes. But the truth is that good true canonical engames click right away (Madney, Cap and Athena).

7. Should we expect a Buddie canon? I think season 7 can be considered the last to summarize this issue. Remembering such series as Castle, Bones and the Mentalist, the pairs of main characters did not become canon right away, where by season 4-6. Perhaps the pair of Jane and Lisbon was the longest in this matter, and the most controversial according to the reviews of the audience (meaning that not everyone believed that there would become canon couple). They only got together in the season 6 finale. This is also season 6 for Badie, so I think everything will be resolved this season. Waiting for the canon in season 8, unless a direct indication is given in the finale 7 (awareness of the feelings of at least one of them)!would be absurd. I'm not calling on buddies's entire fandom to quit watching the series (although in the case of outright queerboating of this fandom, it would be fair), but I would urge my sensitive friends to stop deluding themselves at the end of this season.

7. To sum up, I would advise the screenwriters to start writing good love lines for Buck and Eddie, if they are at least as capable of it. Because what's happening on the screen right now is pretty disappointing.

#buddie #911 on abc #evan buck buckley #bi buck #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buck x eddie #911 season 7 #bucktommy #edmundo eddie diaz #911 spoilers #911 show #911 fox #911onabc #queer #lgbt #lgbtqia #biseuxal #bisexual buck

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red-the-dragon-writes · 1 year

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WIP Intros but Make It AITA Tag Game

I was tagged in this by @blind-the-winds :D it's so much fun.

I've basically only got fanfiction wips at the moment, so I'm going to do this for some of those. :D

tagging: @sebedenwrites (hi! :D), @heliopauseentertainments, @asher-orion-writes, @cleverthylacine, @rebornfromsea :D and anyone else who wants to do it can take it as an open tag from me, i wanna see all the AITA wip intros

a note for the non-transformers people - transformers are all basically the same age as soon as they're done being built. the ages look weird as hell because some characters are over four million years old and the other ones i like to write about were built like. last week. they're all adults, though; they are literally giant robots. It'd be strange if they weren't.

[Asshole] Am I the asshole for helping my friend and his crush get together?

I (6M M) am on a team with a socially awkward guy (6M M) who really sucks at dealing with his emotions. It hurts to watch, you know? He's had a crush on this other guy who was built a couple years back (4? 5? M, something like that) for a couple of years now, and a mutual friend of mine and the crush told me that the whole thing was requited even though my teammate is convinced it's not.

I never had a problem getting laid in my life, so I figured there was probably something going on here, and I asked my teammate and he said he's never really discussed this with his crush because he doesn't want to make the other guy uncomfortable and I asked my friend to talk to the crush and he said, get this, he said the same thing. So they both are just sitting on their feelings and moping about it for years. It's ridiculous. So I set up a little date for them at a cafe and told them to talk about their feelings honestly and with a little nudging got them to confess.

Now they're both mad at me. My teammate says if I ever pull that again he's going to kill me.

EDIT: They're specifically mad that I held them at gunpoint to get them to confess.

EDIT 2: Why are you all calling me the asshole now??? Someone had to do it.

EDIT 3: You guys have no idea how annoying it was to live around. I'm serious. Someone really had to do something or I was going to lose it.

Am I the asshole for setting this kid up to fail?

I (∞Δ) work mostly as a death god these days, and me and my friend (∞Ω) have been keeping our eyes on this team of Decepticons (7M) that were built recently because they keep sending me work while being incompetent as it gets. Back when my friend was a little more active I cross-aspected into chaos godhood and while I don't do much of that these days, I hold a bit of a torch for the bad old days when I was driving entropy on a little more actively than I am now, and this team reminds me of the folks I'd put together back then.

But like I said, they're incompetent and they keep walking spikefirst into active war zones. All but one of them got themselves blown up and now they're down here with me. They're not so bad; I think they're funny. That's not what the issue is, that's just the way of the world.

Thing is, the fifth one lost his shit and walked out of his life to come find the entrance to my domain and get them back. Like we're talking full-on batshit levels of behavior. He listened to everyone saying he couldn't get them back and decided they were wrong and it was his responsibility to, or something, and then just left to go cross the planet until he found it.

This is funny as hell. Haven't seen anyone pull anything like that in centuries. Maybe even eons. So me and my buddy, I was bullshitting with him and I actually let this pissed off little truck head down into the underworld. You know, classic fairytale thing, they come down and they do the trials and they fail and then I get the whole set.

I'm not sure where to add it, but I think it's also worth a note that this truck keeps threatening to kill my subordinates and coworkers. He's not very nice, he's just funny to watch.

Anyway apparently my buddy wasn't aware that was the plan, that the whole idea was that I'd set forth impossible tasks and he'd fail. Now in fairness, my friend's a living god and he mostly sees the winners, who are even fewer and further between. He's all upset with me for setting this guy up for failure, convinced it's not fair. I'm pretty sure what would be unfair would be me letting this guy break the laws of nature just because I find him funny. I don't know, I'll let you guys answer. Am I the asshole here?

EDIT: Thank you guys, I've spoken it over with my friend and we've agreed that it makes the most sense to let them all go back to the overworld for now. I realize I've forgotten that I'm a chaos god first and a steward of the underworld second, and that throwing these five back upstairs to cause problems is the best thing I could do to balance out the fact that my friend keeps bringing his favorites back to life too. Thank you all for the input.

AITA for murdering my therapist?

oKay so the autobots put me (uhhh like 6m) in jail and it sucked and then they cut me off from everyone i know and it SUCKED and then they put me in freaking. "therapy" with some therapist who was insistent that im energetic because i'm "too anxious" or something and they kept me in like full body bondage and shit and it wasnt even kinky and it SUCKED right like. for months. and they kept asking me stupid questions and it was really annoying and they kept not letting me see my old teammates and acting like I was stupid and putting me back in a cell. Eventually they said that I could go to the therapy sessions without being fully restrained if i behaved nicely so I played nice and then i got to kill the therapist and then tried to break my friends out. It almost worked but they caught up to us after we'd busted out two of five mecha and now drag Strip says that i fucked up because if i left the therapist alive we'd be away and scot free right now. Is that my fault? Aita or whatever?

#tag game #i dont remember any of the people i used to tag in these fjfjfh its been like a year #this was a TON of fun though #i hope everyone enjoys it #tf writing

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simstryingtheirbestok · 1 year

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For the interested, an explanation about the gameplay behind Velma and Devon is below the cut.

As I think I've hinted previously, these two don't seem to be autonomously inclined towards one another, at all.

They never have been. Velma gets the little floaty hearts with, I would estimate, 4 out of 5 male Sims she meets (including, to my great disgust, Violet's asshole husband). Moreover, most male Sims get the little floaty hearts with her--that percentage is even higher, like around 90%.

When she first met Devon, I was a little disappointed to find that he was both in that 20% of guys Velma doesn't find attractive, and in that 10% who don't get excited by Velma.

But hey--they're both writers and bookworms, right? And they have compatible signs! And Velma's track record with guys is--well, we've all seen it. She bagged three guys on Love Day, only one of whom with she had any significant prior relationship.

So, yeah. I had faith that my highly sex-positive legacy heir was up to this challenge!

After a month of gameplay, though, I think the verdict is in: That faith was misplaced. In trying to get these two together, I keep running into the same problems over and over again:

Devon runs a little on the glitchy side. That's one of the reasons I moved everyone to Aurora Skies: I was hoping that might sort out whatever's wrong with him, but it didn't. The last time he was over to visit Velma in Aurora Skies, he kept vanishing. The game would show him on the lot, but I combed literally every tile of that lot and, nope! I don't know whether this is that thing where they glitch into the underground or what, but I kept having to reset him, then invite him over again (or summon him via Master Controller).

It would be one thing if I thought he were gay or male-preferencing bi, but in fact Devon is very, very enthusiastic about other, non-Velma ladies. Here we see him engaged in conversation at Velma's, fresh from breakfast at the bistro with some other gal (one of the Vinters, I think) and thus still in his tux:

But he isn't talking to Velma.

(Velma fired her at once.)

3. One of those non-Velma ladies Devon is very, very into is her sister, Vivienne. I'm not worried about that busting up Vivienne and David--those two have clearly mated for life, and who knows, maybe they're polyamorous--but it obviously has the potential to be a huge problem between Devon and Velma. I've posted a couple of examples of this previously, but the problem is, those aren't all the examples. Basically, if Devon is on a lot where Vivienne is, especially (but not necessarily!) if David isn't there, he's going for it--every time. They are both Hopeless Romantics, so maybe that's it. Or maybe it's that country-western singer hairdo Vivienne's got. Who knows?

4. As I've mentioned previously, based on her autonomous interactions with him, Velma seems to see Devon as a friend and only a friend. If I don't drive her social choices, it's all "Complain About Status Quo" (she picked up the Rebellious trait in Elmira City, which 🥴 I'm a mite tired of after Yuri), "Describe Radical Idea," "Condescend the Mainstream," and all her other Avant Garde bullshit. (That trait is definitely a mixed bag for me. It's a hoot when she's critiquing the houseplants, but it's not the greatest for starting conversations, nor for romancing Sims she plainly doesn't want to romance. Oh, and if I don't keep a close watch on her, it inclines her to accuse Sims of being sellouts. That's what happened here.)

5. Yuri and Tahiya.

--wait, what?! Let me explain:

I dropped in on these two recently to grab the pics of Yuri on the phone with Velma that were used in this post. On switching households to theirs, this is how I found them, down in their basement gymnasium:

Just a-flirtin' and a-complimentin' and at some point flowers were exchanged--a real pair of elder lovebirds.

Now, I know not everyone was pleased with my breaking up him and Enya, but do you see why I did it? This, Yuri and Tahiya's whole dynamic, was a large part of why. (Okay, yes, Enya's Smustle obsession also played a role, but mainly it was this.) His jackass dating profile notwithstanding, Yuri adores Tahiya, and I couldn't say no to that.

THAT is what I want for Velma. I want to load up her house two generations from now, and find that she and whichever decrepit guy she is with are still making shmoopy faces at each other.

And she just isn't going to get that with Devon.

Oh! she'll have Devon's baby. That's what I promised, and in fact that's already underway... but Devon isn't who I'm ultimately pairing her up with, if in fact I ever pair her up with anyone.

She has commitment issues, remember? 😉

#ts3 #ts3 legacy #sims 3 #sims 3 legacy #the sims 3 legacy #planetary legacy #generation mercury #velma jeffrey #devon miller #some maid whose name i forget #tahiya padrino #yuri padrino

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theghostus · 1 year

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2023

What's up 2023! Also an update from my last post.

That Sat Le Bf wasn't working. He wasn't even replying to my messages, Only told me late at night after I sent him an emotional message that he went out shopping with his aunt threatening to fuck this. He immediately replied (not all, of course) that he will message me tmr. His message was to tell me that we will be having dinner with his BFF and fam. I mean really. He told me he doesn't have money and doesn't want to meet. Sigh. Thinking about this pisses me off.

We met his BFF and fam. His two daughters are cute. The younger one is a little out of control, but they're the parents. They can handle them. I'm the sort of a slow burner with big and little people. I see how they behave and what they're like before I act accordingly. Thankfully they live nearby. Gave them a Xmas present in the form of a bath soap and handwash courtesy of my mum's bingo and award prizes. Le Bf bought his aunt a pair of gold earrings with one of 8 credit cards. I'm thinking of pushing him one last time to cancel 5 of them. Overall was okay. The little monsters were their parents' problem, after all.

Yesterday, my mum and I finally went to Bro's pl. The journey takes 2 buses to reach plus a 15min walk. Their pl is small compared to mine. However, they are cosier and more fun as they have 2 cats. I plan to make a weekly trip there to make friends with the shy cats. Also, le bf is working about 30 mins away from there; it's killing 2 birds with one stone.

I'm on edge whenever I bring mum out, especially around ppl. I can't let my guard down. It's hard, especially when I don't have a job yet. The migraine and the breathlessness are real. The last time I was breathless was when I was at a job where no one was there to help me about 8 years ago. Yesterday my breathlessness was tough as I could feel a sharp pain each time I tried to breathe in. I discovered this wherever I spent about 200 at the mall. Damn you CNY sale.

All I want in a job is to suit my personality or keep me happy enough to stay.

My aunt still hasn't come through. Instead of keeping me updated, she stayed radio silent till I asked. She is pending for my next follow-up on Tues. I'm sure she has a ton of excuses, and all of them are not her fault. Looks like she going to get a monthly follow-up. I need the money to fix up my kitchen. My house looks so fucking empty and lacks the warmth that a home should have. I really want a proper sofa.

Just so damn tired; everything hasn't settled.

Side plot: for CNY, I feel le bf doesn't want me to meet his family. By me meeting his family, he is stating a commitment and telling the family he will have to change religion (yeah, we're an inter-racial 'couple'). He thinks I've forgotten. Time and time again, I've proven to him I DON'T forget. This 14 Jan will be the last time I probably meet and contact him (it's so hard, so so hard not to). Again, I'm not sure if I want that much commitment to him.

This brings me to another social influencer/branding marketer; his relationship. He's gay and born to a Malay Muslim family. He's the eldest of 5 siblings and literally helped his mum put himself and his siblings through school while his dad was in prison. His family is accepting of his orientation and relationship with a Chinese man. They even bought a house together. His partner even met his family. Even his father, who was released from prison last year, met him. The difference is his partner's family doesn't know him (maybe some do) and even his orientation (maybe not all) as he looks like a typical straight guy. His fans have seen his partner on his live Tiktocks while vacationing in Bangkok. So I think Le Bf will keep me away from his family, much like the above scenario. But is that a bad thing, though?

I want to do typical couple things yet keep it lowkey.

8/1/23

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arethereanyoriginalusernames · 4 years

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ZP stuff for other people

Kayla edition :)

Disclaimer because yes. I do not own Zoophobia or anything like that. This is also not a post made with the intent to police what people do. This is a list of misconceptions and fun facts people can use if they want to. This is all for fun, so I hope you enjoy. Feel free to add your thoughts in replies and reblogs.

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It’s quarantine time, hunnies, so let’s write some fanfiction.

1. The bad girlfriend

Spoiler alert, we're going to be seeing a few misconceptions that involve turning Kayla into a villain, and this is just one brand of it. This one deals with instances where a story portrays Kayla as, surprise, a bad girlfriend. More specifically, she's either portrayed as a toxic partner to Zill, or she causes problems that Zill has to deal with.

On one hand, I blame the writing of the OG comic for this. I mean, literally our first look into their relationship is a chapter revolving around them having relationship troubles. I dunno about you, but having that be an introduction to any relationship doesn't sound like a great idea to me. It can imply that the relationship is not a strong one, and that these characters might not be right for each other. However, due to how Vivz portrays the relationship outside the comic, and in chapter 4, this relationship is clearly meant to be a strong one (they're the school power couple for christ's sake).

Some of you may be thinking that portraying Kayla in such a way is the writer trying to break them up. Except nope! Surprisingly, I see this in works that have almost nothing to do with the couple. Like... guys. What are we doing here? Yes, Kayla can get angry at Zill, but this happens specifically when Zill fucks up real bad. Kayla is usually a nice person, and this side of her is rarely shown in in general.

2. The Temptress

Somewhat akin to the previous, this deals with instances where it's shown to be a bad thing that Zill is dating Kayla at all. This shows up in different ways. To name a few: Kayla is bad because whenever someone upsets her, Zill comes after them; Kayla is bad because Zill spends more time with her than other people; Kayla is bad because she causes Zill to be romantically unavailable to other people, etc. This... puzzles me. I've seen people try to villainize Kayla simply because she's dating Zill, and sometimes because them dating causes Zill to act in specific ways. To name one instance, one fic I read recently had Zill intimate Damian simply because he bumped into Kay at a comic book store, and she inevitably got scared. And the story makes both Zill and Kay to be the bad guys here. Because Kay can totally 100% control what her partner does.

Funnily enough, this bothers me more than the previous, given that there, I can at least understand why Kay is the bad guy.

3. The Bully

Heeeyyy, you guys know how Kay is a nice person, is friendly to most people, and is incredibly sweet? Fuck that! Don't you know that Kay is homophobic, xenophobic, probably every type of phobic (even doorphobic), and will crucify all those who stand in her way? That's right, Kayla caused nine e××ven, world war two, the extinction of the dinosaurs, etc!

I realize that tone can be difficult to read through text, but I assure you that the previous paragraph was satirical. Anyways, I'm sure at least one person here already has a good idea about what I'm talking about, but for the those scratching their heads, let me explain. This refers to when, no joke, Kay is turned into a female Leeson. Her Christianity is used as an excuse to turn her into a stereotypical, oppressive bitch. Thing is, she's kind of, ya know, not Leeson? As shown in pictures of her interacting with characters such as Addison, Kayla clearly holds more progressive ideologies. Also, Kay, as shown in ch.4, is someone who would stand up to injustices, and help those in need. She, like some real life Christians, may simply follow aspects of Christianity that involve not being a dick to people.

4. The High Achiever

In regards to a fun fact about Kay, there's the fact that she's too legit to quit when it comes to being a student. Apart from being the class president, she works hard at her studies, and is a good student. This doesn't just extend to drama either, but likely all her classes.

5. The Dreamer

The previous fact could be due to her dream of making it big as a performer in the E! District. Possibly inspired by her idol, Celeste, Kay aspires to become a star. However, due to the fact that mammals are lower on the social ladder than snakes and birds, this could prove to be a difficult task.

6. The Rival

Kay does have a rival that exists in the form of Baltimore, who I believe goes to another school, if I recall correctly. Baltimore, being an avian, would have an easier time getting success than Kay, and I imagine that conflict between the two would bring that problem up, with Balti taunting Kay about how nobody would want to see her preform.

7. The Aussie?

As pointed out by @eclecticcoyote , Kay being Australian usually gets forgotten about. While we currently have no reference as to how much this influences her lifestyle apart from her voice, this is something that can be played around with and could make for some interesting scenarios.

8. The Voice of an Angel

Listening to Kayla's Headcanon voice, I would say that Kayla's singing voice would be around the tenor range. Not quite soprano, but still higher than alto. Basically, I can see her lower notes hitting the alto range, her usual voice being tenor, and maybe being able to hit some falsetto. Also, looking at what songs Vivz has drawn her singing, Kayla seems to lean towards mainly Broadway numbers for song choice.

She also can play the piano

9. The fighter

A lot of people, I've noticed, like to write Zill as the one who engages in physical confrontation, while forgetting that Kay can kick some serious ass herself. Not only does the chick have them fencing skills for days, she can literally knock out Rusty with a punch. Not sure if ya guys noticed, but Kay doesn't need Zill to do all the punching. She can knock some heads in herself, thank you very much.

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That's all I've got for now. I may have forgotten something, and will make a follow up post if it turns out I did. I hoped you enjoyed, and feel free to request whatever you want.

I apologize for wasting your time

- Spooky S Skeletons

#zoophobia #zoophobia kayla #kayla zoophobia

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incarnateirony · 4 years

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Sorry but 'loving poly fantasy' is still disrespectful af. I'd be beyond uncomfortable if thousands of people online were writing stories, drawing art and writing metas about how I'm secretly fucking a colleague while my wife watches?? Also I've seen Cockles blogs which do a fair amount of stalking. It may be hands-off stalking, but it's still creepy.

Okay look, I can tell someone’s going to want to go into a tit for tat about Cockles vs J2 Tinhats and keep trying to draw false parallels.

Again, this is someone from the outside looking in and observing but

Cockles narrative has never:

- Made people invade their real space in private venues- Impeded on social, PR, or POLITICAL EVENTS- Given direct threats to the wellbeing of them or their families

Now again, I’ll agree. There’s some Cockles fans that have crossed some lines imo. As a data hub, I’ve been privy to some of that. But no matter if my skin crawled with certain data or not, all of that – ALL of it – pales in comparison with the simple offensive reality going on and what the J2 narrative inspires.

No matter if you feel squicky when you read someone giggling about a ring or an underbear, this is your personal line of comfort. At some point, my personal line of comfort has been crossed on a few times. Those details stayed in DM enclaves, even if I was uncomfortable with them existing at all, and *none* of them evoked any kind of direct engaging Problem™ like J2 narrative causes.

It’s… fine for you to not like RPS? I … honestly don’t either? But that doesn’t mean I’m going to try to draw equal guilt or parallel in their actions, dialogue, or consequences.

What you, specifically, determine as lowkey stalking is likely very relevant

Are they

- Stalking the charter plane number- Publishing the address of their various properties- Trying to bebop establishments specifically hoping to run into them, suspecting them in an area- Hiding behind objects and creeping around corners to steal candid footage/because they’re unwelcome when seen. - Sending dangerous, or threatening gifts or packages to the families.- Staging giant events that they pose as having officiality in intrusive personal spaces and trying to shove their ship content at them without handlers. OR AT THEIR MAYOR.

Congratulations! This is actual stalking.

Not stalking

- Finding or discussing pictures used online- Taking pictures, casually, center stage, at events or venues it’s reasonable for fans to be at, officially set up, and sharing and discussing those pictures- Thinking a couple guys act adorbs

Again, I leave room for there being exceptions to the rules on these, but we’re talking *base pulse of the fandoms*. The inherent dialogue actually causes a psychological attachment where J2 dialogue presumes oneself the bringers of truth, finders of knowledge, and the only ones aware of defending what is Right And Good. Pairing that with “everyone around J2 are leeches” energizes them into feeling VINDICATED for their behavior.

The base. Dialogue. Of Cockles. Simply. Doesn’t. Cause. This.

It does *not* come with psychological association of being the only owners of truth and all resulting classic cult behaviors that somehow elevate them to equal knowing as J2 and above all other people actually in their lives. It literally is a narrative of unwellness.

I don’t care if you’re bigoted against poly people. Well I mean I care, because I hate bigotry, but I mean in regards to this discussion I absolutely do not give a shit if you find RPF horrific because some people paint them as happy and poly. Which, frankly, you’re projecting your offense all over and thinking Jensen would be *just as mad* that people giggle about the ring *he literally gave Misha* as he is to people *blackmailing his family and finding any excuse to break past handler lines*.

There is no universe in which these two things are remotely the same or even categorically dismissable in the same vat.

You don’t have to like Cockles, that’s… fine too. But trying to dredge it up by starting with “poly is gross like cooties” and then going on to eulogize that you don’t like RPS in general fails to actually address the reality and context of *WHY* we are talking about this right now.

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sunbeams-and-honey · 3 years

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Astrology for the UK and Christmas 2020

Just to prewarn you, this might not be coherent in places but I need to get this out. I also waffle quite a bit in some places because I have Feelings when it comes to the government.

Okay so those of you who, like me, live in the UK will probably know about the current plans for relaxation of the restrictions for Christmas next week. While there is a lot of speculation as to whether or not this is still going to go ahead considering how many places have just been put into Tier 3 last night, as of 16.12.20, and the press conference that was held by the government an hour ago, the plan is to have 5 days of relaxation of the rules. If you want to know more about that then do your own research on it, I'm here to talk about the transits for the country as a whole during this time. I wanted to do this because I already had a bad feeling about Christmas, and I can't just leave you guys in the dark if I found anything, and I did.

Also, disclaimer: unlike our government, I'm aware and completely respect that Christmas is not the only holiday around now. Hanukkah, for example, is currently being celebrated right now. However, I only refer to Christmas in this post because I used the 25th December for the date of these transits, which is the date most commonly, but not always, used for Christmas Day. Also, the government only seems to acknowledge this particular festival as this is the only one that has received special treatment this year, or any year if we're completely honest. It's because of the government's attitude towards Christmas that I'm making this post, so that is the only celebration I refer to.

So on Christmas Day itself, there is so much emphasis on family, as you would expect for Christmas. This can be seen especially with the fact that we have 3 planets transiting the 4th house of family. First of all we have, Jupiter, which represents abundance and harmony. This is a likely indicator that the current relaxation plans are going to go ahead, and even if they don't, so many people are going to break the rules anyway and see their loved ones over Christmas. People in the UK are going to be spending time with the people they love and it's generally going to be a happy few days.

However it's not all fun and games, because the other two planets crossing the 4th house are Saturn, which represents responsibility and learning lessons, and Pluto, which represents problems and death. When I tell you my stomach literally dropped when I noticed Pluto here. You might be starting to see why I'm worried. These two planets being related to family over Christmas is a huge indicator that something is going to go very wrong. We're going to be learning some tough lessons, perhaps learning that we shouldn't have relaxed the rules. I mean we've literally got the planet of loss and endings crossing family. I'm pretty sure you can put the pieces together. Saturn's placement in this house indicates problems with health which makes me very scared for the near future. There is also the idea that responsibility is going to be taken, so maybe the government is going to start acknowledging where they've gone wrong for once, but that might be a stretch considering the government we have.

There are a couple of other things that I noticed too. The Sun is transiting the 3rd house of communication. This could symbolise a lot of things, but it definitely puts an emphasis on relationships with extended family, which makes sense. It also shows that this time is going to be very busy for us all, which again was to be expected. However, it is also symbolic of us as a nation of becoming distracted and losing sight of what is important. This could mean us getting carried away and forgetting about the consequences of our actions in terms of how quickly the virus will later spread and kill.

The more I look at this chart, the more I see an emphasis on the 3rd house. I was mainly focused on the 4th house as it's all about family and that's where Pluto is going to be, but the 3rd house also has 3 planets transiting it: Sun, Mercury and Venus. There might be some issues with travel or technology across the country but I'm unsure how this is going to manifest itself. This is generally going to be a positive time which is good but there is without a doubt a cloud looming once the effects of this relaxation make themselves apparent.

Mars is transiting the 7th house which is curious because that's all about compromise? Perhaps the current plans will have changed slightly by the time they come into effect.

Uranus in the 8th house is a symbol of financial instability, which is naturally concerning. I wonder how long this will take to materialise. Maybe new data about how badly the economy has been impacted will come out?

Now I didn't know whether or not to put this in, but Neptune in the 6th house does suggest that we will be experiencing the negative effects of medicine. This is really bad timing considering the vaccine has only just come out, but it could be related to something else in medicine. (No, I'm not an anti-vaxxer, I'm not an idiot, but some people are and I don't want any of you taking this the wrong way or using this as a reason to not get the vaccine. Don't be a twat, okay?).

Speaking of anti-vaxxers, I'm really quite worried about the misinformation that could be getting spread around during this time, as Neptune will be squaring Mercury. People will be more prone to believing in lies and conspiracies so if you find yourself doing the same, try to stay logical. This whole thing is going to be fuelled by fear, as you would expect, and also by misunderstandings and confusion.

Sun will be squaring Uranus, which could unfortunately mean that the government is going to act illogically, which never ends well. This transit also foretells of surprises and changes that we didn't see coming.

Moon conjunction Mars shows people taking risks and making stupid decisions, so please make sure you think carefully before you act.

Jupiter opposing Saturn suggests that a decision made by government in the future in regards to the country's way ahead will receive some backlash from the more conservative people in our society? Maybe another tory rebellion like we saw recently. However Saturn trine Uranus shows that we will be more open to change. Perhaps the way we're dealing with certain things will change but not without struggle and opposition. I have a feeling this may have more to do with social justice in this country rather than our dealing with the pandemic, but I could be wrong.

I've added the chart I used below. Feel free to add on anything else you find.

So to sum up, the Christmas period itself will be rather joyful. We'll be able to have some fun with our loved ones for those of us who are fortunate enough to do so. However, there is a cloud looming ahead, I do believe. I'll do more research on the aftermath of this and I'll make another post about it soon. Please be sensible and please stay safe. Love you all.

#astrology #astrology transits #transits

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ally-writes-many-things · 5 years

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End (Jay Halstead) Part 2

Summary: Things have been going downhill between you and Jay and it just might cause you to break up.

Words: 2131

Requested: yes

Prompts:

Warnings or A/N: n/a. I'm sorry. I can't help make more chapters to a one shot lol. I wouldn't have made another End once shot but someone requested me to do it.

*A year later*

You pushed the button on the elevator and waited for it. "No, I said white carnations, not blue," You said on the phone

The voice came through. "It says on the order sheet white,"

You were getting annoyed. Nothing was going according to plan for the reopening party. "Whoever wrote that down is an idiot! I specifically said white carnations. They are the owner's wife's favorite and she wanted them. Get it fixed!" You said hanging up the phone.

You started to dial another number when the elevator doors open finally. You looked up at the doors and you saw Mr. and Mrs. Brennenington. The owners of the hotel you are currently a COO at. You looked at them confused. "Mr. and Mrs. Brennenington! I thought you weren't coming in till later? Your room isn't ready yet. I've just had so many things to do, some many things are going wro-"

Mr. Brennenington reached out and grabbed your hand and placed his other hand on top of yours. "Y/N! It's okay! We got an earlier flight. Not your fault and we trust you got everything under control. As for the room, when is it gonna be ready?"

You raised your phone up to where you could see it and unlocked your phone and pulled up the room charts. "It says in about an hour,"

They nodded and smiled. "Well, can we put our luggage in your office?"

You smiled and nodded. "Of course, this way,"

You walked to the end of the hallway and unlocked the door to your office. They smiled at you and walked into your office and placed their suitcases to the side of the wall. They looked up at you and smiled. "Have you had lunch yet?"

You hadn't. You've been running around trying to get everything ready for the reopening party tonight. The hotel you work for wasn't shut down for bad reasons, hell the hotel is one of the best in this part of Chicago. The owners just wanted it to be remodeled to a more modern look. You looked at the time on your watch and it was twelve fifteen. "No, I haven't. I have had so much to do the past couple of days that I literally hadn't had time,"

Mrs. Brennenington smiled and placed a reassuring hand on yours. "Y/N, I'm sure everything is going to go fine. We trust you. Besides the party is tonight, you can have an hour lunch with us,"

You loved working for the Brenneningtons. They absolutely love their hotel and they treat their employees like family and always make sure they are healthy and comfortable working here. "Sure,"

They smiled at you and started to walk out of your office but your boyfriend Jonah aka their son walked in. "Mom! Dad! Heard a rumor you were early," He said walking over to you and kissing your cheek.

You smiled and so did they. "Yeah, we got an earlier flight. Come have lunch with us,"

He hesitated and looked at you. "There's no use in trying to say no to you, you know how they were,"

He chuckled and nodded. "You're right. Let's go,"

You felt Jonah slip his arm around your waist. You looked up at him and he looked down at him and he kissed you. You met him after you landed the COO job maybe three or four months ago, you accidentally bumped into him while carrying everything to your office. You dropped everything and he helped you carried it to your office and every since then you were head over heels. "Okay,"

---

*A few hours later*

Jay walked into the ballroom, ready to do this uncover mission and get it done. He looked around and didn't see the target. "Do you see him?" He asked into the earpiece.

A few moments later Upton's voice came through. "No, not yet,"

Jay was walking around the ballroom looking for the target while keeping an eye on where his team was. He stopped at a corner where he could see everyone leaving or entering. While standing there, Jay heard a lot of people talking about how pretty this girl and how handsome the boyfriend was. Jay didn't pay attention to it since the last time, he was in a relationship, he fucked up majorly and lost her. "Y/N did such an amazing job on the party,"

That caught Jay's attention. Jay started to think about what you were doing a year ago and it was management but surely it wasn't you? Was it? He started to look around and his eyes landed start on you as you kissed Jonah. Jay's heart dropped. He didn't think he'd never see you again. "Jay, earth to Jay!" Burgess yelled into the earpiece.

Jay snapped out of it and answered back. "I'm sorry, did you see the target?"

Burgess respond immediately. "Yes. He's walked straight up to the Bennington's son,"

Jay nodded. "Which one was he again?"

This time Burgess didn't immediately respond instead it took a few seconds. "The one Y/N is standing next too,"

Jay's eyes immediately went over to where he last saw you and there you were and there he was. Jay quickly looked around and spotted the suspect, Jay noticed that he had his hands in his jacket. "Suspect is holding something in his jacket. Going to get close to him,"

You were smiling and talking with guests and VIPs when you noticed a man walking up to you. It doesn't look like the type of guest who would stay here but nonetheless, you smiled and was about to say something but Jonah beat you to it. "What are you doing here?"

The man looked up at Jonah with the nastiest look you have ever seen and cackled. "I'm here for the money you owe me,"

Jonah looked at him weirdly. "What are you talking about? I don't owe you any money. I cut you off,"

You looked at the guy and to Jonah. "Jonah, who is this?"

Jonah didn't look at you when he answered you. "No one important,"

You scoffed. "Why does he think you owe him money?"

The guy sighed and quickly pulled out a gun and pointed at you. "Lady I don't get time for your questions. I just need Jonah here to give me the money he owes me,"

Everyone screams and started to run out of the room but obviously, you couldn't, the gun was pointed at you. "I don't owe you anything once again," Jonah said.

You were afraid to even move let alone talk. The guy walked up closer to you. "Either you give me the money or I'll shoot your whore,"

The next thing you knew was there was someone knocking the guy down, you saw that the gun landed not too far from you and you walked up there and kicked it far enough to where the guy couldn't reach it. You walked up to the guy who tackled him and he looked at you and your heart skipped a beat when you realize who it was. "Jay?"

He smiled softly. "Y/N,"

You walked up closer to him. "Will you tell me who this is since clearly, he isn't,"

You said glaring at Jonah. "He's a mid-level drug dealer. He's Jonah's high school best friend,"

You turned and faced Jonah. You opened your mouth but it wasn't your voice that came out, it was Mrs. Brennenington's. "Jonah! How many times did I tell you to not to get involved with him?"

Jonah looked at his mom, face full of embarrassment. "Mom-"

She looked unpleased. "Don't mom me, I've told you countless times, to drop him cause all its gonna do is cause problems. Giving money to a person who is an addict to drugs is enabling them. You're lucky you make your own money, or you would be cut off," She said walking off.

"Mom," Jonah called after her but she ignored it and kept walking.

He looked at you and took a step closer to you but you took a step back, tripping over your own feet but you felt hands immediately go on your waist stopping you from falling. You turned around and saw that it was Jay. You smiled and turned to look at Jonah. "No, I've told you my story about how drugs ruined my family. You knew how much it hurt me and how much I despise drugs but yet you gave money to a drug dealer,"

Jonah looked at you. "But I haven't done any drugs,"

You scoffed. "Yeah sure,"

---

Jay had walked you into an interrogation room in the Intelligence Unit a few hours after the party because he wanted to ask you a few questions. So you were sitting in the room waiting for Jay to come back in. You saw the door open and in walked Jay and Hailey. "Hailey, it's good to see you again,"

Hailey smiled and nodded. "I wish it would've been on a different term,"

You smile slowly dropped. After you and Jay broke up, you had spent all of your time building up your career, not allowing you to have any social time. You cut out all friends including Burgess and Hailey. "Yeah, sorry. I just became busy on my career,"

Hailey shook her head and sat down. Jay sat down next to her. "So at the party, it seems like you didn't know anything about what was happening between Jonah and his friend Oliver, right?"

You nodded your head. "Right. Tonight was the first time I have ever seen him. If you're allowed to tell me, besides popping him for drug possession, what else did he do?"

Jay and Hailey looked at each other and sighed. "Oliver is looking at a count of murder,"

You looked at both Hailey and Jay, confused. "What does this have to do with Jonah? I mean you guys took Jonah in?"

Jay started to open his mouth but Hailey beat him to it. "We think it was Jonah's idea,"

Your heart started to beat fast, you got out of your chair and started to pace. "Y/N, is there anything you can tell us that might help us?"

Your mind was racing through a thousand different things but the main thing was the body. "Have you found the body?"

They shook their head no. "We found photos of the body in Oliver's house when we were gonna bust him for possession,"

Thousand more thought went racing through your mind until one stood out. "I overheard Jonah and someone talking over the phone about a problem but when I asked him what the problem was he was it was just a hotel problem. Jonah has a storage unit,"

Jay stood up quickly and walked over to you. "Where?"

"Blue's storage number 45,"

Jay placed a hand on your shoulder. "Are you on the lease?"

You nodded. "Yes,"

----

You were at your apartment trying to understand what happened and trying to make yourself believe that Jonah actually was involved in a murder. After they found the body, Jonah confessed to everything. He apparently was giving money to Oliver to buy drugs and have him sell them and the person who was killed was a competitor who was approaching their territory and Jonah had Oliver talk to him but things got heated quickly and Oliver killed him. The pictures were Oliver wanting to relive what he did.

You heard someone knock on your door and you got off the couch and opened the door. It revealed Jay. You smiled and motioned for him to come in. "Hey,"

He turned around to face you. "Hey,"

You two sat there in comfortable silence for a few moments before Jay finally broke the silence. "I'm honestly truly sorry about what happened between us. We were in a dry spell of sorts and I didn't see a way out of it-"

You shook your head. "Jay, it's okay. I felt the same way,"

Jay looked at you shocked. "Really?"

You nodded. "Yes. I was actually going to tell you about it when everything spiraled,"

Jay was quiet for a second before he spoke again. "Can we pretend that everything that happened didn't happen and start over?"

You smiled. "Hi, I'm Y/N,"

He chuckled. "Hi, I'm Jay,"

#jay halstead #jay halstead x reader #jay halstead x you #chicago pd #jay halstead imagine #adam ruzek #kevin atwater #hank voight #kim burgess #antonio dawson #trudy platt #jay halstead x imagine

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roxilalonde · 6 years

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hey could i ask advice on being bi and bi relationships? im a woman and im currently in a relationship with a guy and we've been together 3yrs and as I've gotten older I've realized i'm mostly attracted to women. and idk recently i've just had a lot of doubt about like. if I'm actually bi or. like if I'm actually attracted to him sexually. I know i love him, i just feel conflicted and confused and i was wondering if you've felt that way or have advice or. anything.

hey there! first off, i’m really sorry you’re going through that. i’m here for you, if that helps – i think a lot of bi women experience what you’re going through. if nothing else, please know that you’re not alone in your problem.

there are a couple of things that could be at play here. on the one hand, bi people face a lot of pressure to downplay their attraction to one gender in order to conform to a mainstream idea of sexuality as an either-or phenomenon. as such, bi women often doubt their own bisexuality, as it’s easier to convince yourself that you’re faking than to convince a society that they’re wrong. i personally do this to myself a lot! it takes a lot of effort – and, point blank, raw stubbornness – not to just give up.

however. compulsory heterosexuality (the societal pressure for women to be attracted to men) is going to be a part of any wlw’s relationship to her sexual orientation, and it can really do a number on our ability to parse platonic intimacy from sexual attraction. as a consequence, there exists a documented phenomenon of lesbians identifying as bisexual for a period before coming out as lesbians. this may happen for a number of reasons, and to be clear, i don’t want to speak over lesbians or speak personally to experiences that aren’t mine, so i would really recommend seeking out takes written by lesbians on this subject in order to get an accurate sense of perspective. but one explanation i’ve seen is that lesbians may identify as bi during a time when they had realized they’re attracted to girls, but haven’t yet realized that they’re not attracted to boys – two different mental conversations.

“attraction” is a really, really social concept, to the point where even if you have absolutely no real attraction to men, there may still be moments where you think you do. an explanation of the issue i particularly like is the distinction between the idea of sex/romantic relationships with men being “possible” or “endurable” and “enjoyable activities that i actively want to pursue.” i.e.: if your desire to date or have sex with men is not borne of honest enthusiasm for the idea, but instead any reason besides earnest personal desire, then it’s not attraction. sex and dating are supposed to make you happy. if it isn’t making you happy, something’s wrong.

this is, admittedly, easier said than internalized. women are conditioned all their lives to believe that they are and should be attracted to men, and we carry that paradigm with us, regardless of how cognizant we are of it. realizing you’re gay, unfortunately, isn’t enough to make that conditioning go away. since i don’t know the details of your situation, i’m hesitant to give you advice as to how to handle the situation itself. but i can offer you some resources which, i hope, will help you make your own decision about what you feel, and wade through the thunderdome of sociological theory that makes up any conversation about sexuality.

“Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence,” by adrienne rich, is a fantastic article that helped me, personally, sort out my relationship to my sexuality. i consider it a foundational article for understanding how women experience SGA. “The Queer Apologetic: Explaining the Use of Bisexuality as a Transitional Identity,” by nicholas guittar, talks about the experiences of people who do or have id’d as bi despite not being so, and why that is. and a resource i recommend in general for a lot of bi and bi-questioning people is “Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Bisexual,” by david halperin, which is great not because it offers a conclusive answer to literally any questions about bisexuality or what it means to identify as such – it doesn’t – but precisely because it nails down the ambiguity inherent to id’ing as bi in the first place. and then it cites a bunch of attempts to answer that question.

an additional resource is “Defining Bisexuality: Young Bisexual and Pansexual People’s Voices.” it’s a study recounting a variety of responses given by bi and pan people when asked how they understand bisexuality. now, i don’t agree with everything the participants say, necessarily (when asked what bisexuality is, for example, one person just tosses out a number on the kinsey scale, which is proof positive that just because a person ids as bi/pan doesn’t mean they know shit about it). but others have insightful takes on what it means to be bi and how they conceptualize it, and if you skip to the conclusion of the study, you can get a useful overview of the article without wading through all the responses.

if you decide that what you feel for your boyfriend is platonic intimacy instead of romantic attraction, understand that you don’t have to lose your relationship entirely or cut your boyfriend out of your life – relationships change and evolve, and it’s more than possible to develop meaningful, deep intimacy with people you’re not attracted to. people who care about you will recognize that. conversely, if you decide that what you feel for your boyfriend is romantic, know that you’re one of many bi women who happen to have a preference for other women! and having a boyfriend does not make you any less such. good luck, and whatever you conclude, i hope you end up happy.

#i am so fucking sorry i didn't realize it was going to turn into an essay holy shit #uh. i hope this helps? and if not. i hope it helps somebody at least #lmk if you have any questions about this behemoth or want follow-ups to any of the links #lgbt #Anonymous

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jdmainman123 · 2 years

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All right your boys in Utah and Boston had a message for you guys since we can't align snow socialism against every sunlight City socialist and we thought we'd say sorry for failing. And they were running away from boredom

#Running

More importantly me being in these cities I have on more than five times try to throw myself in front of a bus and a car because your people's boredom literally made me suicidal

And Boston called it you guys are an accident because you guys are boring

YEAH THEY WERE ALL TRYING TO COMMIT SUICIDE IS WHAT WHAT ARE YOU GUYS STAND IN LINE AND WAIT TO GET MY ATTENTION SO SO SOMEONE CAN SHOOT YOU. SOMEBODY DON'T GET ENOUGH IMPRACTICAL JOKERS EPISODES? WHAT DO WE NEED TO GET IN THE STUDIO AND REWRITE THE TUPAC ALBUM AGAIN. I THINK THAT'S ALL THEY GOT ONE TV SHOW AND ONE AND ONE SONG ONE ONE ALBUM.

But but you boys you're lucky you're so smart I know you're going to understand why you wanted to oh cuz you can erase me the problem is you race to be too hard cuz the problem is this girl. I mean honestly the chief probably came forward saying he doesn't need you. This girl soon as I got to the airport the door was wide open it's just in the other side butt naked that I've been waiting for one of you either you or him.

Yeah what I'm saying as long as she's not sick she's ready to go 24/7 she says I wasn't expecting him but since he's here and then she jumped up in the air grabbed her car keys went outside got a drink and started yelling at man you don't have the balls to rape me here outside.

No you know what it was you guys understood I came from downtown and all I would find here was boring cars driving by then after you put me in the parking lot for 5 years I thought me being around hundreds of thousand people in the union forced blood down my face. But turns out I may only be here cuz you're integration and anti-seeding satellite I know you're satellite better than you satellite makers I REMEMBER HIS TESTAMENT SOUND LIKE YOU SAID I WANT TO TRY IT I WANT TO TRY IT I WOULD KILL I WOULD DIE TO TRY THE INTEGRATION TO ANTECEDENT BE MADE SICK AND NOT BE ABLE TO HOLD MY OWN THOUGHTS. AND THEN THERE WAS A LINE OF THEM OVER 1 TRILLION SATELLITE MAKERS WANTED TO TRY IT AND THEN THEY NEVER MADE IT OUT

Your city's a little like Cloverfield they were walking through the pasture through the field and it was so boring one by one they started to die of natural causes what one by one they would fall over to the side and died

You're so boring she outlived you. I guarantee she laid on her back and played dead and said I know in another couple weeks he's going to walk out that door and jump off the building

SO ANYWAYS YOU BOYS ARE PLAYING WITH ME AND I DON'T APPRECIATE IT AND IF IT'S JEALOUSY OF THIS GIRL CUZ LET IT GO. EVEN EVEN WITH THIS WHITE GIRL I SEEN HER DRAW CUT SO DEEP IN YOU GUYS AND LET ME TELL YOU THIS SHE MIGHT HAVE BEEN HERE IN PRISON BUT LOCATION MEANS EVERYTHING TO WHERE YOU MEET SOMEONE AND IF THIS PRISON WAS BUILT TO END IN CAPTURE HER THEN SHE WON THE FIGHT. AND SHE LET ME INFORM YOU SHE ALSO WANT TO FIGHT THE SAME GIRL ONE THE SAME FIGHT IN MY BIGGER CITY AT LEAST 5 FT 3 IN YEAH IT WAS HER AT THE TOP AND SHE SAID EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY IS NOW MINE AND THEN SHE SAID SUCK MY P****

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fire-fira · 7 years

Note

hi this is a really random question but how did you first figure out that you weren't a guy or girl? I've been feeling a bit confused about my gender recently so do you have any... tips, I guess? idk

My case is one of the weirder ones I think, but I’ve had plenty of others tell me about their own experiences, so I’ll tell you about mine and then what I know of various others’ (because I think those others’ might be more helpful for you).

And since this is a long post I’m putting it all under the cut so I don’t bog down anyone’s dash.

Me:

So in my case some things to know are that I’m hyperlexic (which makes me freakishly gifted with language and writing systems) and that as a result I was WAY too smart as a kid, and the fact that I figured out I wasn’t a guy or a girl when I was four. Also, on my fourth birthday it was like someone threw the switch on my awareness: one moment I might as well have not consciously existed, and the next I did (like I said, weird).

On top of that, my family on my mom’s side (the side I grew up with) is predominantly women (to the point where for a large portion of my life there were only two guys– my grandpa and one of my cousins– to six women and girls and then me). Also, all of the women in my mom’s side of the family are women who are strong-willed, capable, and never really bought into the usual gender stereotypes, so I grew up in a social environment without a lot of gender-stereotyping.

So whenever I heard my family referring to me as ‘she’ and ‘her’ and it just felt wrong, I literally went through the thought process (at age four keep in mind) of ‘This doesn’t sound right. Why are they calling me that? They must think I’m a girl.’ And that led to a whole long round of questioning if I was a girl or if I was just a different type of girl than any of them, and even had me briefly thinking about and dismissing the idea that my ‘problem’ with being a girl might have been because of that ‘girls can’t do ____’ attitude that so many people/other kids had– with the end conclusion that whatever I was I was NOT a girl. So next logical question was ‘I’m not a girl, does that make me a boy?’ And when I looked at other people, my family, what I saw in books and on TV, all I felt was ‘Nope. I’m not that either.’

So fun thing for me, though I had the logical assumption that if I wasn’t a girl or a guy that that must mean there were others out there like me, at the same time since I didn’t see any examples of anyone non-binary I assumed that if I told anyone that everyone else would think I was ‘insane’ and have me committed to an asylum and that I would never be let out. (0 out of 10, would not recommend being in that head-space.) I didn’t tell anyone outright that I wasn’t a woman or man until literally my last day of high school– and then only to one person– and I didn’t start being more open about it until I really started doing research when I was about 23.

I don’t know how helpful my past is on that count, but there it is.

Others:

Some others I’ve talked to have had a sense their whole lives that something was off, and others didn’t even think about it because they assumed their discomfort was ‘normal’ and that everyone experienced it until they met someone who was visibly out and non-binary (in my experience usually me), and a lot of the time they didn’t know they even had an option to been seen as anything but their assigned gender until they saw it was possible. There is no right or wrong time to realize that you might be something other than the gender you were assigned at birth. The big thing is what it feels like internally.

Some people I’ve met are like me: they’ve known their whole lives (that they can remember), but when they didn’t see any recognition they tried to bury it– sometimes to the point of forcing themselves to temporarily believe for a long time that they were only the genders they were assigned at birth. Learning about non-binary genders, meeting someone who is non-binary and out, and doing some thorough self-questioning as to their sense of their own genders are all things that have helped them.

Others have felt mildly uncomfortable with how they’ve been referred to the majority of their lives (and the discomfort can vary in intensity), but since they were so rooted in their own lived experiences and gender is something that just doesn’t get coherently talked about a lot they just assumed that everyone experienced the same discomfort. I’ve heard at least two or three people admit that they had thought that ‘No woman likes being a woman,’ or ‘No man likes being a man’, ‘Every woman wants to be a man or something else, that’s normal’ or ‘Every man wants to be a woman or something else, that’s normal,’ until somehow it came up and they said something of the sort in conversation only to find out that others they talked to didn’t experience that at all. In other instances it has taken some people meeting and talking with someone non-binary and hearing them talk about their experiences in order for some things to click.

And then there are those who didn’t know it was an option. They had their feelings, they realized at various points in their lives that something didn’t feel right, but they figured no one would care (or that no one would accept it, or that others would just assume they were trying to be ‘special’, etc.) and so there was no point in pursuing it– until either they got fed up with lying or (again) they learned about non-binary genders or met someone who was non-binary and out.

So, some things to keep in mind:

All gender is, is your internal sense of being a woman, man, or something else– even when you strip away the concepts of femininity and masculinity. If something clicks and gives you the sense of ‘This is what I am,’ and it feels 100% right to you, then that’s what you are.

It’s possible to be a feminine man or a masculine woman.

It’s possible to have a feminine or masculine gender without being a woman or a man. (Juxera is a good example of a feminine gender. I can’t recall off the top of my head a term for an equivalent masculine gender.)

It is possible for your gender to change over time. There are loads of instances of people who started out as 100% one gender and over time their gender shifted to something else later in life for an extended span, and then after a time it shifted again. If that’s something you’ve experienced there’s nothing wrong with that.

It is possible for a person to have multiple genders going on at the same time. It’s also possible for a person to have multiple genders that fluidly shift depending on the day and situation. (I have one genderfluid friend who rotates between woman, man, and a non-binary gender with occasional sliding-scale gender-placements somewhere between two of the primary genders they has– woman/NB, NB/man, man/woman. In one really weird instance they had a day where they was equally woman and man simultaneously, when normally if two genders are going on at once then one of them will be more at the forefront– like 70% guy and 30% woman as one example.)

It’s possible for a person’s internal sense of gender to fluctuate in intensity. Some days a person’s sense of their gender might be at 100%, other days it might be at 0%, and at still other times it could be at 30%, 45%, 73%, etc.

It’s also possible for someone to have a stable sense of being some percentage of the gender they were assigned at birth and some percentage of another gender (in which case demigirl, demiboy, or demigender are appropriate terms).

It’s also possible to experience an absence of gender, because agender/lacking-any-gender is also a thing.

And it’s also possible to have a gender that essentially consists of ‘???? I have no damn clue what my gender is.’

Do some research, see if anything makes sense to you. Question yourself and go with what feels right. Trust your internal sense of who you are; because ultimately the only one who can tell you what your gender is deep down is you.

A couple blogs that might help with learning about and investigating non-binary gender identities are these two: @nonbinaryresource and @nonbinaryconfess. Both of them are really good about answering questions too, and I’ve actually learned a lot about other non-binary genders that I didn’t know about. (I’d be careful about going through the non-binary tags just in case there are any nasty enby-phobes posting in the tags.)

And if all else fails and you want someone to talk to, my messenger and inbox are always open. n.n

#non-binary #nonbinary #gender #my life #I hope this helps

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