so that issue where the wolfgang/annie post not showing up on my desktop theme is still happening and i really don’t know what to do to fix it. the reblog is showing up on my blog and i can see the original post on mobile, but for some reason the original post isn’t showing up at all on my desktop theme and it’s completely hidden from my story tag/character tag, as though it was never posted at all. the only way i can see it on desktop is if i go to my archives and search for it, otherwise it just doesn’t appear at all. honestly, if this issue doesn’t get resolved, i don’t even want to post my story anymore

🌸 Updates and FAQs for Watching the TGCF Donghua! 🌸

✴️First, check out my detailed guide HERE if you want to know how to subscribe to YouTube or Bilibili!

Please read through these if you have any questions first before sending in an ask, as it's probably answered here (or the previous guide)!!! If you don't see it here, or still have confusions afterwards, then feel free to send in an ask or DM me!

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✨Important Notes/Updates✨

Bilibili is allowing non-members to watch for free! No region locks, and you don’t even need to make an account. Free watchers will be one week behind paid members. But this is a legal and free way to support the donghua if you’re unable to pay! (This actually means that you’ll be able to see the episodes faster and for free on Bilibili than you would on YouTube, because YouTube has a two week delay instead of just one week.)

Funimation is broadcasting TGCF in the US, Canada, UK, Ireland, Australia and New Zealand. These are some of the regions which are blocked by YouTube, so this is an available alternative for those who don’t want to go through Bilibili. They have also stated they will launch in Mexico and Brazil this winter.

ALL broadcasts are in Chinese with hard-coded/embedded English and Chinese subs. (I.e., they come with the broadcast itself, on top of the image. Nothing to toggle on/off, they are automatically there.) They are the exact same across all the platforms.

Please support official releases so that we can get more seasons, and high quality! This is still niche content, believe it or not!

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✨Frequntly Asked Questions✨

🔹GENERAL FAQs:🔹

1.) "Where is the best place to watch?"

I still reccomend Bilibili's native website/app over all other streaming platforms. This is due to some key points:

Bilibili's website/app gets the episode the very second they drop. There is no delay whatsoever. YouTube and Funimation have been delayed the last two weeks. It's unknown if this is just a hiccup or what, but if watching new episodes ASAP is important to you, going through Bilibili ensures you will not have to worry about any uncertainty.

Price breakdowns: Bilibili's website/app 3-month membership is $10-11 USD. Their YouTube channel's "MBBM Lv2" membership varies by region, but in many places is similar or just a tad more. In the US, the MBBM Lv2 membership and Funimation membership is the same price ($5.99 per month, or $17.97 for 3 months). So you can actually save some cash by going through Bilibili directly.

In the end, this is largely up to personal choice and comfort. Some people may find it difficult to navigate Bilibili's website even with guides and google translate's auto-translate feature. In this case, YouTube or Funimation are fine alternatives. If you also have an existing Funimation sub or plan to use it to watch other shows, then that's perfectly valid too. Similar with the MBBM lv2 sub on YouTube, especially if you want to use it to see other shows (e.g. Legend of Exorcism which is only English-subbed on YouTube).

2.) "Where do I watch for free?"

On Bilibili's website, you can watch episodes for free! You will be one episode behind paid members, but it's a legal way to support the donghua. You don't even need to create an account!

3.) "What episode will be airing when/where?"

Check out the table below for the differences in airing times. Time is 11AM China Time.*

NOTE: Funimation is technically supposed to be the same as Bilibili members/YouTube MBBM Lv2, but the last few episodes have been delayed so I have no clue.... *Additionally, YouTube's episodes have been delayed by a little bit, but they've aired the same day.

4.) "How can I support the donghua?"

Free, on YouTube: Subscribe to Bilibili's YouTube Channel, give likes to TGCF videos/clips, and leave nice comments!

Free, on Bilibili: Everyone can follow the official TGCF account and page, plus leave likes on videos. All this following stuff requires you to have passed the Bilibili quiz to unlock levels: If you are lv2+, you can leave comments and give coins to offical TGCF videos. (Log in daily to get 1 coin/day if you're lv1+!) If you are lv4+, leave a good 5-star review!

Paid: Buy subscriptions to watch the donghua! Also, merchhhhh~

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🔸YOUTUBE-RELATED FAQs🔸

1.) "What's the difference between Bilibili's YouTube Channel's MBBM Lv1 and Lv2 memberships?"

MBBM Lv2 allows you to watch the episodes on the same day as Bilibili's website broadcast.

MBBM Lv1 has new episodes delayed by one week, meaning you will be one episode behind the others. There actually is zero point in subscribing to MBBM Lv1 (unless you want to watch other subbed donghua) because you can watch the same content on Bilibili for absolutely free, since Bilibili is allowing non-members to watch TGCF one episode behind paid members.

You can also watch two episodes behind on YouTube.

2.) "If I have YouTube Premium/Red, do I still need a membership on Bilibili's YouTube page?"

Yes. YouTube premium is completely separate from the channel-specific memberships.

3.) "Are episodes simulcast on YouTube?"

While originally stated as being simulcast, there actually seems to be a bit of a delay on YouTube as of now. It's unclear if this will change with future episodes.

4.) "Do I need a VPN?"

If you are from one of the restricted countries, then yes, you'll need to use a VPN. You can still pay for the subscription as normal, and then use a VPN to watch the donghua. It will not affect payment.

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🔹BILIBILI-RELATED FAQs:🔹

1.) "Do I need to take that 100-question quiz to sign up for Bilibili or the membership?!"

No, it's totally optional! You do not need it to either watch the free episodes or to buy a membership. It's only if you want to comment and stuff. It might make you think you gotta do it, or enter a code, but it's actually not needed. Check out THIS post for more info!!! (However, you may still want to do it in order to level up and eventually leave a nice review for the donghua!)

2.) "I'm only able to watch 6min on Bilibili's website when I watch from my phone. Do I need the app?"

You do not need the app. Switch your browser to Desktop Mode in order to watch the video in full.

Be sure to download a browser like Google Chrome, Firefox, etc that supports this mode if your native browser doesn't allow for it.

3.) "Can I get the app on iPhone/iOS?"

This depends on if you are in a country where the app is not region locked in the app store. If you're able to download it that way, great! If not, try using a VPN and setting your region to mainland China. It may work. APKs are not useable on iPhones, so unless you know how to sideload apps onto your device, you may be stuck with the app store only.

Do note that you might be unable to pay for a Bilibili membership through the app, depending on version, but you can always simply pay through the website and then use the app as normal. It will apply account-wide on all devices.

4.) "Why are there two versions of the app?"

One seems to be the international version, which is more basic and lets you pay via GooglePay/ApplePay. The other one seems to be made for mainland China, and allows you to even buy merchandise through it (Chinese address/bank acc required). Mostly, both have to be downloaded via APK on Android. But some iOS users have reported different versions of the app being available for them through the app store (namely the int'l ver, and some have said they can use a VPN to get the mainland one).

5.) "Is there any benefit to having the app over just using the website?"

Not really, no. With the app you can buy very cute hualian themed skins for your profile, though (if you have the mainland version of the app). Plus you can save videos for offline viewing.

6.) "Do I need to enter my area code for Bilibili when signing up/in?"

NO, you do not enter your area code in the phone number field. Select your country from the drop-down list and it will automatically consider your area code. (E.g. if you're in America, select 美国 and enter in your number like 5557779999.)

7.) "I didn't get to set a password when signing up, so how do I log into my Bilibili account after being logged out?"

Use the same phone number you did to sign up. Instead of a password, you'll enter in a one-time key that is sent to your phone via text message. (NOTE: some people have reported not receiving these messages, which may vary by phone carrier!)

As mentioned above, don't include your area code when filling out your number.

Also, if you are signed in on the app on your phone, you can scan the QR code on the log-in page through the app.

8.) "How do I turn off the barrage comments filling up the video I'm watching?"

Select the little button that reads "弹" under the video:

(Website vs App)

9.) Is the Bilibili subscription auto-renewing?

No, the 1-month (¥25), 3-month (¥68), 1-year (¥168) subscriptions will not automatically renew. They are a one-time payment only!

Notice that the renewing payments all say "连续" in front of them, which means "continuing" or "successive" types of subscriptions. They are also cheaper than the one-time payment. (E.g. the renewing 3-month sub is ¥45 instead of ¥68.) Moreover, the renewing types are not even available to purchase with PayPal, afaik. You need Alipay or WeChat Pay, etc.

10.) "Can I use the app/membership to read the manhua too?"

Unfortunately, not quite! Your Bilibili account is universal, but you'll need to download the manhua app seperately and topping up M-coins to pay for the manhua. (One-time purchases, either by volume or by chapter as per your choice.)

11.) "What resolutions are available?"

You can watch up to 480p as a free member. Paid members can watch at 1080p and high-bit-rate 1080p. It's possible to chromecast it to TV, too. (I haven't tried it, but others have!)

12.) "Can I watch across multiple devices?"

Yes, you can!

13.) "Do I need a VPN?"

No, Bilibili is not region-locked. However, some particular countries may have Chinese apps blocked.... :(

14.) "I want to leave a comment/review. How do I level up on Bilibili?"

Log in daily, watch at least one video per day, give coins (attained by logging in) to your fave videos, etc! It will definitely take a while haha.

15.) "Will I be able to watch other donghua like MDZS or SVSSS with my membership on Bilibili?"

No, those two donghuas are produced by TenCent, not Bilibili. You will need either a TenCent/WeTV account, or you can watch them on their YouTube channel (free).

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🔸FUNIMATION-RELATED FAQs🔸

1.) "Is Funimation's broadcast a simulcast?"

It is supposed to be, according to their initial announcements. They seem to be having some technical difficulties, but those may be resolved soon. I suggest keeping an eye on their twitter for updates if you are interested in watching through them!

2.) "Do I have to pay extra on my Funimation sub to watch TGCF?"

No, afaik, the regular $5.99 sub covers TGCF too.

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I hope this helps out people further, so we can all have an easy time watching the donghua! And please do support it legally! 🙏

If you still need help, feel free to send in an ask!

ok look..idk if you got the other person's ask or if you're ignoring it, so ill send one too. you don't have to post this because you can show that you saw it with your actions... but you need to like, reconsider your desktop theme. the hueshifting colors when you hover over an image, hard to parse text-on-background, and especially the flashing fast moving background of the ENTIRE THEME is...not good. im not sure if you realize how much that can hurt somebody so ill tell you in hopes that maybe you'll care. It can cause a sensory meltdown, to a migraine of varying severity, to a seizure. like, that can hospitalize or even kill someone. this is not an exaggeration.

this isn't saying you can't post flashing images, as long as they're TAGGED but...the thing about a theme, YOUR theme, is that it is *unavoidable*. someone visiting your blog on desktop will not be able to avoid the flashing images.

it will never ever be a necessary part of having a fun, bright theme. you can make your space bright and fun without making it a hazard to photosensitive people (if you're sensitive yourself, those who are at so much risk that they'd never be able to have a blog like this) please, put the feelings of us over an "aesthetic". remove the flashing images, make the text easier to read,..well im not going to spoonfeed you, you can look up accessible web design tips but ...please.

i am very very very sorry for that, im changing it now. i set that theme a long time ago when i hardly had any followers and i honestly saw this blog as a space just for me, so i never thought other people would see it/be affected by it. also i barely ever use tumblr on my computer, i mostly just use mobile, so it completely slipped my mind.

i’m sorry for such a short response, im trying really hard not to get defensive over your tone—i completely understand that this is an important issue but this was a deeply upsetting way to word this message. please don’t assume that i don’t care about people and i only care about my “aesthetic” just because i was stupid about my blog theme.

also in the future if anyone has something serious to tell me, please dm me rather than sending an ask. i rarely ever get notifications for asks and i cant see my inbox most of the time since im on mobile.

Prompt: Anne/Gilbert courting they’re in Anne’s room and then marilla returns so Gilbert has to sneak out lol!

OKAY HERE WE GO! I actually finished something for once! It is TOO LONG and SELF INDULGENT and I had the BEST TIME! A few people have expressed interest in this (madmen, all), so I’ll tag you in then post with a cut, or you could rock on over to read it on Ao3! @platonic-oxymoron, @jump-on-winds-back, @chocolatelatte121, @andim-pirate, @neliel-deathberry

So without further ado (or only the brief ado it takes me to figure out how to cut on desktop)…

Summer had arrived in Avonlea. In all truth, summer had arrived in Avonlea several weeks earlier, but the inclement internal weather of Anne’s life of late had rendered the view rather cloudy from her window for a while there, and so perhaps it was better to say that summer had arrived—finally—in Anne. 

And what a summer it was.

The Snow Queen had advanced her reach so far that year that, with Anne’s window thrown open to the warm breeze, her outermost boughs reached past the casement and allowed the scent of blossoms to settle without having to do the tremendous injustice of cutting any sprigs loose. In the deliciously lazy few hours after lunch, the sun was in its prime and perfect position to extend its rays into the gable room, that so beloved tree stepping in again to render the light not sharp or overbright, but soft and golden and glorious, throwing shifting patterns on the floorboards. All the air was warm, perhaps under other circumstances too warm but with the light wind, the shade being indoors offered, the lack of necessity—there, in her own space—for long thick stockings or fussy aprons, no one to tell her to roll her sleeves back down her arms, rather than oppressive the afternoon seemed sweet, a little sticky but not unpleasantly so, stretching out slow and endless like toffee.

The house was quiet, Matthew tending the back field and Marilla having retreated to Rachel’s for the afternoon, leaving Anne alone but for the beating embodiment of her sudden shift in seasonal outlook, making himself quite at home as he lay, barefoot and trousers rolled to the knee, nose in a book with his head hanging upside-down off the edge of Anne’s bed. 

He had more freckles, in the summer. Anne could count them all, if she wished to, but for the moment found herself quite content to sit propped up against the footboard, a book of her own in her lap, watching. 

Well. Almost content.

“I don’t believe for a moment that actually works.”

“Sure it works,” came Gilbert’s reply as he lazily turned a page, the book obscuring his face for a moment though she could hear the smile in his words. “The brain needs oxygen to function, oxygen is carried in the blood, blood is as amenable to the affects of gravity as anything else, therefore: lying upside-down makes your brain work better.”

“There’s a logical fallacy in there somewhere, I can smell it.”

“Oh can you?” Gilbert asked, the smile in his voice broadening. “Where?”

“Don’t know,” Anne replied with a sigh, flicking a strand of hair out of her eyes. “It’s too hot to think: ask me again in Autumn.”

“I strongly suspect neither of us will remember to raise the argument again come Autumn.”

Anne snorted. “Me, miss an opportunity to point out a flaw in your intellectual argument? I think not.”

“Well that’s true,” Gilbert agreed, his smile finally reappearing to Anne’s eyes as well as her ears as he set his book down, still open, on his chest. Blinking at her a few times (and looking rather comical doing so, being as he was upside down), he sighed. “I’ve been reading the same three pages for half an hour and I don’t think I’ve taken in a word of it.”

“Probably too much oxygen to the brain,” she quipped back, before setting her own book aside. “I never would have thought there was any circumstance that could deter me from the written word, but even I am struggling to process much from the page on so compellingly syrupy an afternoon,” Anne said, swallowing down a yawn and swinging her legs round so that she could lie back besides Gilbert, eyes drifting shut. “It’s like bathwater: I just want to fall asleep.”

“If you fall asleep now you won’t tonight, and then you’ll have hell to pay from Marilla when you refuse to get up in the morning.”

“Oh why should we get up in the morning, anyway? There’s so much day to be getting on with at the moment, surely some small portion of it could be given over to that most delightful and rare of luxuries that is the lie-in?”

“I thought mornings were for chores around here,” Gilbert said with the grin of one allowed entirely free reign over his own comings and goings.

Anne groaned. “Oh don’t, it’s summer: a season much too romantical to be tainted by the likes of laundry before ten in the morning. And don’t think I can’t feel your smugness without looking at you, Bash keeps you on entirely too long a leash.”

“Hey, I do laundry!”

“You do laundry precisely when you do everything, which is at whichever point in the day suits you. I love Marilla with the depth and wholeness of my heart, but Lord in Heaven does the woman love a schedule. I swear, once I have my teaching certificate and the promise of endless, uninterrupted summers, I won’t be getting out of bed before eleven a single day of them. I won’t even sleep that long, I’ll just wake up and stay in bed for hours and hours and hours, simply because I can.”

Gilbert’s grin softened at this, all teasing and fond. “I don’t reckon you could last ten minutes in bed after waking up without being bored to tears.”

“I certainly could,” Anne insisted, warming to her theme. “I’d keep a veritable mountain of books on my bedside table and spend the whole morning just reading. Maybe I wouldn’t even bother with a bedside table: just pile up all my books on the floor and balance my coffee on top of them.”

“If you don’t plan on getting out of bed,” Gilbert began slowly, clearly aware that he was walking into a trap and full of the imminent delight of being thus caught, “how do you suppose you’ll be getting ahold of coffee?”

Anne paused, then rolled her head ever so slightly to the side and cut a pointed and speculative glance at Gilbert.

The beaming, boyish smile that overcame his face was thrilled.

Gotcha. 

“Now that seems decidedly unfair.”

“Well,” Anne sniffed, returning her gaze to the ceiling. “Doctors don’t get summer holidays.”

“That is a sore wound and rubbing salt in it is actually very cruel.”

“Oh how you shall suffer, upheld as you shall be as a paragon of upright gentlemanliness wherever you go—”

“I’ve no doubt you plan to make that very difficult.”

“Positively fawned over by your grateful patients bringing you flowers and cakes and… and jars of various preserves—”

“From which you will get equal if not greater enjoyment, so you are, in advance, welcome.”

“People naming their dear children after you—”

“God, I hope not.”

Anne pulled up short at that, snapped out of the playful exchange as she turned again to Gilbert with a frown. “Well what’s that supposed to mean?”

His face screwed up in evident distaste. “We have to swear an oath, you know: Do no harm. Not sure I’d be able to say I was honouring my promise if my presence lead some poor child to being named Gilbert.”

“What’s wrong with Gilbert?” Anne asked, contrarily offended on his behalf. “I like it.”

He gave her a look that suggested she might have gone quite mad.

“Well I do! I don’t think I’d considered it all that much prior to coming to Avonlea, and… I will admit for a while it did prompt a thrill of what I generally assumed to be rage, but now… names are just words for people, aren’t they? Gilbert is the word that means you, so naturally it has to be one of my very favourites.”

Again his faced softened, became something that wasn’t exactly a smile but was so unflinchingly open, so tender, Anne was of half a mind to look away. She didn’t. 

“You know,” he said, absently tangling their fingers together on Anne’s faded quilt, “for someone who seems to relish in being mean to me you can be incredibly sweet when the spirit moves you.”

Anne shrugged. “I contain multitudes.”

Like that, the broad, delighted grin was back. “That’s Whitman—Song of Myself.”

“I know. I might have to wait until sunset at the moment but I have managed to do some reading.”

“And you chose to read Whitman.”

“Of course,” Anne said, genuinely a little baffled that he seemed so very pleased by the fact, as though it wasn’t obvious the copy of Leaves of Grass would leap directly to the top of her extensive to read list the moment he placed it in her hands. “I know it means a lot to you.”

He simply blinked at her for several moments, before his mouth went crooked in a wry smirk. “I might start handing you copies of The Lancet, just to see if you could force yourself through all that dull writing.”

Anne, forsaking for a moment the mantle of a mature young woman, stuck out her tongue. “Now who’s mean?”

“I suppose we’re equal.”

“Well then, rejoice old world, for all is as it should be.”

He squeezed her hand, his eyes soft and brown-sugar warm, something in them that, even in the summer, always seemed to remind her of Christmas. He smiled. “Yeah.”

Anne wasn’t sure, with all the years and years of promise she had ahead of her in order to test the truth of such a belief, that she’d ever grow accustomed to this part. For all the marvellous, sweeping romances she’d read through the years not one of them had ever truly provided any great detail on a kiss, shying away into the vagaries of metaphor which, while lovely, paled in comparison to the focus and specificity of the real thing, and to that entire grand pasture (until recently existing entirely unbeknownst to Anne even in her wildest imaginings) of all that was around a kiss in and of itself. 

For example, this: those breathless moments leading up to it, wherein contact became an inevitability and yet still—even after several seemingly eternal weeks of increasing familiarisation with one another—the thrill of nerves, the restless, impatient aching in the palms, the sides of the neck, the small of the spine that those eyes, suddenly heavy, brought forth in her. The fading out of the outside world, only ‘fading out’ wasn’t quite right, it was more like fading in, all the focus that had been spared for other things narrowing its scope (and how could she ever have imagined that a narrowing of scope might bring such a rush of muchness!) until all it encompassed was her, and him, and them—this thing that they became together, united in purpose and humming like one of Miss Stacey’s wires, the length and breadth of them startling and electric and alive. 

God, he hadn’t even touched her yet. Perhaps attempting this with their heads hanging off the edge of the bed wasn’t their wisest of plans: the whole thing left her light-headed enough when she was the right way up. 

Still, Anne had never been one to back down from a bad idea, and Gilbert had never once tried to dissuade her—only ever asked for the chance to join in. 

He asked her now, with the tilt of his head, his breath warm in the already warm room, the soft downturn of his softer eyelashes blurred to dark brown smoke from this close (and he really was terribly good at getting that close without Anne entirely realising it was happening. Probably she should ask how he did it, but really she already knew that the answer was magic).

Anne, as she was so often inclined to do where he was concerned (now that she had allowed her inclinations the free reign they rightly deserved) said yes.

Oh, she was certain she’d never get used to this.

It started soft, as it usually did, the barest brush of lips that sparked and made her breath catch, reminded her that she was breathing at all. His fingers, still intertwined with her own, tightened their grip involuntarily, and even with her eyes closed Anne could feel the furrow of his brow, that little line of concentration and control that baited her, bothered deliciously at her until she inevitably managed to soothe it flat, until he relaxed and melted into it like clay under her hands.

That wasn’t just yet, though: that part came a little later. 

For now it was delicate and fluttering, not indecisive but unhurried, a little awed. There was no reason, Anne had concluded, no reason at all why placing one’s mouth on someone else’s ought to be so thrilling to every last thread of her, except for the fact that every point of contact, every movement of his lips against her own (a little firmer, now, a little longer, a little more intent) sang with the knowledge that this was Gilbert, Gilbert with the good heart and the gentle hands and the lopsided smile and the brilliant mind, and that that mind had chosen in that moment to put his mouth to her, to kiss her this way and then that, that of all the things that he could have elected to be doing right then it was kissing her that he wanted… that was where the thrill lay. Kissing in general, she supposed, might well be fine enough, but kissing Gilbert…

He shifted his attentions from Anne’s top lip to the bottom, and she pressed her sudden advantage to slot them together properly, like puzzle pieces sliding into place. Surely no-one else would fit her the way he did? Surely they were made for each other, when they worked together so well?

Ever so gently, his teeth scraped against her lip, and any question marks in her thoughts turned to dust.

Loathe to lose the contact, Anne decided against trying to sort out which fingers belonged to who on their entangled hands, instead rolling onto her side just enough for the hand she had spare to reach Gilbert’s face, trace the high of his cheek, the cut of his jaw of which she was so inexplicably fond—perhaps because its sharpness under her palm felt so very real, perhaps because the roll and motion of it took her back, again, to the mechanics and deliberation and will—his will, Gilbert’s!—behind his mouth on hers, or perhaps because of the way that every time she touched him there he shivered a little, and she felt the kick of it in her bones. She felt rooted, certain of and one with her skin in a way she rarely had the luxury of experiencing: she knew she was solid, and grounded, and there, because Gilbert was, and she had moved him. What a power that was, she thought as her fingertips skimmed the shell of his ear, found their way to the curls at the nape of his neck (which she had found she was also tremendously fond of)—to know that she could put her hands on him and he would move for her, just like that. She couldn’t entirely fathom what she’d done to deserve such a thing, but then she felt the instinctive shift of her own spine under his hand as it found her waist, and realised perhaps that was it: the utter trust it took Anne to be able to respond to him without thought or hesitation was a gift that earned the same in return. It was about balance, and faith, and equality, in this as in all things between them. 

She loved it.

She ran her fingers down the line of his throat to his collarbone, felt him draw a sharp breath straight from her own lungs as his hand flexed, tightened against her waist, and then gave her breath back in the shape of her own name.

“Anne.”

She wondered whether that was one of his favourite words, too—it certainly sounded that way, when he said it—and decided it was only fair she got the same opportunity to voice the name of her own joy that he did.

“Gil.”

Things blurred and sharpened then, the passage of time becoming hazy and malleable even as otherwise minute details—the exact pinpoint location and pressure of his thumb against her ribs, the back of her foot brushing against his shin, how she could just feel his heartbeat against her palm with her fingers hooked over his shoulder, the only fast thing in a world gone slow as honey. 

What a thing, to feel with her hand the impact she had on the heart of him; to know his love (he loved her, he loved her!) as something tangible, this thing she’d longed for no longer only curled through the landscape of her imagination but right there, held close, a rhythm against her skin.

His mouth sought out her throat, the exact spot just above the collar of her dress where her pulse beat strongest, and how could she do anything but smile, laugh breathlessly at the reassurance he was searching for? Yes, she said, with her fingers tangled in his curls, with the tilt of her head to make room for him, yes, Gilbert Blythe, I love you too.

And so they went, the tick of Anne’s clock forgotten amidst the heady sweetness of being together, and close, and in love in their own little corner of the world, into which nothing else might enter and from whence no-one might remove them.

Or… almost nothing. Almost no-one.

Divinely and determinedly distracted as she was, even Anne’s dubious sense of self-preservation cut sharply through that most pleasant of fogs at the creak (oh blessed creak!) of the kitchen door. Gilbert, who had eventually corralled enough mental direction to unwind their joined hands and set about one of his favourite pursuits—the utter destruction of whatever sense of order Anne had managed to impose upon her hair—displayed less wisdom, taking a few moments to respond not to the sound of the door itself, but the sudden tension of the girl in his arms. 

“Anne?” he asked, withdrawing with evident reluctance from the crook of her neck, eyes dazed, colour high in his cheeks and—and this Anne noticed with a dangerously distracting level of satisfaction���his hair just as dishevelled as her own would inevitably be.

“Shh,” she hissed, utterly still as she strained to hear any further sound from downstairs, as yet hopeful that she might have been imagining things. 

Footfalls, sharp and eminently recognisable. Anne’s eyes snapped back to Gilbert’s, wide and alarmed as the same sudden understanding dawned on his face. “Marilla.”

Sitting bolt upright (and fighting the sudden head rush the movement prompted), Anne let out a soft curse she’d never have voiced in any other company, hands flying to one of her braids as Gilbert followed suit, the protocol for such a disruption already perhaps an undignified level of established. 

“I thought you said she wouldn’t be back until five?” Gilbert whispered sharply, doing, Anne had to admit, an admirable job of not becoming sidetracked as he combed his fingers through her hair and set about reconstructing her right braid. 

“She’s an autonomous being, Gilbert: evidently she changed her mind! See this is precisely why we should meet at your house instead of here.”

“And risk Hazel wandering in? If you’d like to explain to Bash how his mother came to have a heart attack then be my guest!”

“You have a barn, don’t you?”

“You have a barn!” Gilbert replied, sounding just a little hysterical as he fumbled with her ribbon and dropped it. Twice.

“My barn is regularly occupied by both Jerry and Matthew, idiot.”

“And mine by Bash.”

“Better Bash,” she said, turning her focus to the potentially tricker task of flattening out Gilbert’s hair into some semblance of decorum, “than Marilla.”

“I… that’s fair. Okay, what am I doing?”

Anne bit her lip, casting about the room for escape routes. “You could climb out the window?”

“Out the window?” he repeated, managing to sound simultaneously amused and horrified. “Anne, I’d land directly outside the window downstairs, do you not think she might notice?”

“Well what if I climbed out the window?” Anne asked, rather clutching at straws at this point.

Gilbert was evidently trying to swallow down laughter. “What good would that do?!”

“Fine, okay, okay you’re just going to have to be quiet and hope she doesn’t come in here, and then we’ll… figure it out.”

“Anne, what do you—”

“Shut up, shut up she’ll hear you just, just shh!”

“Alright, alright I’m—” he stopped mid sentence, falling abruptly silent at the sound of footsteps on the stairs. Again they stared at each other, eyes locked in panic, although it became rapidly obvious that this was a mistake as Anne felt a fit of giggles bubbling up her throat.

“Anne? Anne, are you up here?”

Praying that the Good Lord (being entirely responsible for sending trouble her way) might allow her passage through her current trials unscathed, Anne swallowed the laughter down and attempted to even out her voice. “Afternoon Marilla!”

If the look on Gilbert, eyes screwed shut and the back of his hand pressed to his mouth as his shoulders shook silently, was anything to go by, her attempt had failed.

“Oh, you are home! I’d not have expected to find you inside on a day like this,” came Marilla’s voice again from the other side of the closed door.

“I… it’s only, you know,” Anne began a little desperately, thwacking Gilbert with the back of her hand as the trembling of his suppressed laughter increased, “sunburn is such a tremendous pain to be dealing with, I thought I’d better not chance it.”

“Well now. How uncharacteristically responsible of you.”

At this Gilbert threw his head back, having to turn his hand to cover both his mouth and nose as tears pooled at the corners of his eyes, the suggestion of her responsibility whilst she desperately fought to evade the detection of a young man in her bedroom clearly proving itself too much for him. Not today, and perhaps not even tomorrow, but some day soon Anne was going to push him into the Lake of Shining Waters for this.

“Yes, well. Thanks.”

“Well I’m only back for a minute or two—Rachel’s gotten it into her head that she absolutely must furnish you with a new quilt when you leave for Charlottetown, honestly that woman has too many sons and is far too intent on spoiling other people’s daughters,” Marilla added in a undertone which threatened to unbalance Anne’s tenuous grasp on herself and reduce her to Gilbert’s level of amusement, “so she’s sent me back to collect all my patterns that she might judge the most appropriate.”

“That’s… that’s very kind of her. She really needn’t trouble herself.”

“As I have endeavoured to explain to her, though she’s having none of it. Still, I don’t suppose it can do any harm—I do hate to imagine you getting cold all alone, come winter.”

Something about the tone of Marilla’s voice bled the hysterical amusement from the moment, leant it a fond softness that Gilbert clearly felt too, since he was able to uncover his mouth and reach for her hand, thumb brushing softly across her knuckles.

Anne squeezed his fingers. “I won’t be alone.”

“No,” came Marilla’s reply, before a pause. Anne, who was well acquainted with Marilla’s various pauses, could hear the smile in it. “No, I don’t suppose you shall. Well, anyway, I just thought you ought to know my return may be a little later than I’d anticipated, what with Rachel on a mission, so you and Matthew may have to fend for yourselves for dinner. Stick to the stovetop, mind, and don’t be laying a finger on the cake in the pantry, it isn’t for you as you well know.”

“Yes, Marilla, I know.”

“Good. And enjoy the rest of your afternoon.”

“You too,” Anne replied, the tension slowly draining from her shoulders as she heard the footsteps retreating back down the stairs and then, a few moments later, the opening and closing of the kitchen door.

A further few beats of silence, and then a great relieved sigh from her co-conspirator. “Well. That was a bit close.”

Anne, entirely without hesitation and displaying the height of dignity, picked up the small cushion Marilla had sewn for her and whacked him over the head. “You rogue, you utter disaster of a man, could you not have made a little more of an effort to contain yourself? She could have heard you!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Gilbert laughed, sounding anything but as he raised his hands in defence.

“You are not, scoundrel, you’re no good at lies and they don’t become you so you’d do much better not trying. See if I invite you here again.”

“Perhaps it’d be wiser if you didn’t,” he replied, still evidently amused. “Wouldn’t want Marilla thinking you aren’t responsible.”

“Oh she already knows I’m not,” Anne said primly, standing at last from the bed and smoothing out her skirts. “It’s your dishonourable conduct she’d be shocked by: she thinks you’re such a nice young man.”

“Most do,” Gilbert agreed cheerfully, leaning back against her headboard with that lopsided grin again, entirely at his leisure. Oh how intolerable of him, to make her love him so even when he was being absolutely insufferable. “And what do you think, Miss? Do you find my conduct to be dishonourable?”

Though he smiled, Anne was attuned enough to him by now that she could detect the undertone of sincerity in the question. Seating herself again on the bed beside him, she raised a hand to his face then ran it back through his curls, flooded with impossible fondness at the way he leant into the touch. “I believe… that there surely cannot be anything dishonourable in offering a young lady precisely the affection with which she longs to be treated.”

“Well then,” he said, his hand coming up to cover hers where it had come to rest against his cheek. “Can’t imagine anyone else’s opinion matters all that much.”

Anne grinned. “Except Marilla’s.”

“Except,” Gilbert said, tilting his head in deference to her point, “perhaps Marilla’s.”

They sat like that in tender silence for several long moments, before Anne sighed and broke it. “You do realise you have to leave now, right?”

The wide-eyed, childlike disappointment on his face was Anne thought, tremendously comical. “What, why?”

“Because if you don’t we’ll only end up having this exact palaver again in a few hours.”

“We’ll keep an eye on the time!”

“Do you have the faintest idea what time it is now? No, don’t look.”

Having been instructed away from the small clock on Anne’s bedside, Gilbert narrowed his eyes. “… One…ish?”

“It’s half past three,” Anne informed him, unimpressed.

Blatantly disbelieving, Gilbert sat up to get a look at the clock himself. “It never is, it can’t…” He stopped, blinking at the hands. “Are you sure that’s right?”

Anne grabbed his hand and pulled, tugging him up from the bed. Probably her pillows would smell like him that night. “Come on, out.”

“No, Anne, come on, don’t make me go home: Dellie’s teething, the crying’s unbearable.” He fought her as she dragged him to the door, not hard but enough to make her laugh at his recalcitrance. And to think, she’d once thought mystery and melancholy to be the grand romantic ideal: how much better this was, to love and be loved by someone who shared his feelings with her unreservedly, however fleeting or ridiculous they might seem. 

“Then don’t go home,” Anne suggested, pulling him behind her down the hall, then giving him a gentle shove in the direction of the stairs. “Go for a walk, get some fresh air: they say it’s terribly good for you, Doctor Blythe.”

“Sunburn isn’t,” he argued, somehow managing to reach the ground floor without falling as he took the steps half-backwards, eyes still on her as she followed him. “It’s a terrible pain to be dealing with, I hear: I could be laid up in bed for days, and then how would you feel?”

“Find some shade,” Anne said, restraining a grin as she held the kitchen door open for him.

“Surely, being the far greater adventurer of the two of us, you’d be much better at such a search than I would,” he said, standing firm in the doorway and giving her a look of such utterly unconvincing false innocence she couldn’t help but laugh. “Come on, it’s a beautiful day: how could you stand to miss out on it? And think—it’s a matter of weeks before we’re off to the city, surrounded by smog and buildings and the great urban sprawl.”

“Eight weeks, which is in fact two months.” 

Gilbert elected to ignore this correction. “Think how badly you’ll long for a summer afternoon with trees and flowers and rivers then. Can you really throw away this chance, when it’s right here for the taking?”

Anne crossed her arms, fighting a smile and doing, she knew, a very poor job of it. “I suppose it is a glorious day…”

“Glorious,” Gilbert agreed, nodding enthusiastically.

“And I wonder… have I introduced you to my very favourite tree yet?”

He tilted his head, considering. “The Sugar Maple, up near the Andrews’ place?”

“Elm, outside of town—past the old bridge beyond the schoolhouse?”

“Then no, I don’t believe you have.”

“Well then,” Anne said, answering his triumphant grin with one of her own as she fetched her hat from the hook by the door and slid into her boots. “Who am I to deny the most wondrous call of summer?”

“Who indeed?” Gilbert replied, grabbing hold of her hand and pulling her beside him, out into the sun.

Cibele

: a discussion.

Cibele is a game by Star Maid Games/ Nina Freeman [Nina’s website], and released in 2015. Feeling that my friends had more interesting things to say about Cibele than I did, I decided to get their thoughts on the record. Thus was born the first ever List Oriented podcast.

Sian Campbell edits Scum Mag and once baked a very good cake. Xanthea O’Connor [twitter] is a writer, performance-artist, audio tech person and a million other things. 

Xanthea also made the podcast theme song and helped with recording and EQ.  Interlude music was excerpted from the Cibele soundtrack by Decky Coss [bandcamp].

Hit the "read more" button at the bottom there to see the transcript.

Some topics we discussed include: - representations of early/online relationships - is Ichi a creep? - the framing of the ending - to what extent claims to autobiography matter

Some other books and games mentioned: - The Passionate Mistakes and Intricate Corruption of One Girl in America by Michelle Tea - Sour Heart by Jenny Zhang - Minor Characters by Joyce Johnson - I Love Dick by Chris Kraus - Emily is Away by Kyle Seeley

Finally, many interesting things have already been said about Cibele. Suriel Vasquez and Kate Grey both made arguments that Cibele is one of the few games to get sex right. Brendan Keogh notes how Cibele makes players aware that "both the players and creators of videogames never stop being fleshy, meaty bodies in actual space." Lena LeRay compared the depictions of online intimacy in Cibele and Emily is Away. G. Christopher Williams read the game's ending through the similarly cynical lens that we did.

next is Cities in Motion

Podcast transcript

Sian: There needs to be a theme song. [Singing] Welcome to List Oriented. *Finger Clicks*.

Xanthea: I think that’s great.

Sian: Nailed it. Hashtag, nailed it.

Xanthea: We’ll doodle a ukulele over it.

Connor: Can you put some beats in?

Xanthea: Yeah I’ll put some beats.

Connor: Maybe I should just make it so that just pops up automatically when the blog starts.

Sian: Noooo…haha. Like Myspace circa 2006…

[Podcast theme plays]

 Connor: So I’d like to begin by acknowledging the traditional owners and custodians of the land on which we meet today, the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin Nation, and pay my respects to their elders past, present, and emerging.

Hey!

Xanthea: Hi

Connor: Hi

Sian: Hello.

C: Welcome to the first and possibly only edition of the List Oriented podcast, which is…a decision I have made to do a podcast instead of a blogpost for this game, Cibele. Cibele was made by Star Maid Games, which is the vehicle of Nina Freeman. It came out in 2015. To discuss it with me today I have some friends and experts.

X: [Laughs] That’s us!

S: Don’t fact check that.

C: Uh…Sian Campbell, editor of Scum Magazine, researcher extraordinaire…

S: Animal Crossing expert…and Connor’s housemate! Yay.

X: Correct.

C: Aaaand in the other corner… Xanthea O’Connor. Writer, performer…

X: Sims video expert…

C: …Connoisseur.

X: Mhm, mhm.

S: You’ve kind of made it sound like we’re gonna fight.

C: Yeah I mean…that’s probably not going to happen but…

S: Well we don’t know.

X: We’ve got the whiskey out…drinking coffee and whiskey at the same time.

C: Whiskey is a fighting drink. I have a friend who won’t drink whiskey because he says it makes him too angry.

X: That’s why I don’t drink tequila.

C: Oh! Cos it makes you too angry?

X: Mhm, yeah.

S: I don’t drink tequila because I end up with girls in bathrooms.

[All laugh]

C: So Cibele… or “Sybil” depending on who you are, uhm, is a game, which, kind of, is a bit different from other games, it is…uh. It has you play as Nina, the main character, uhm, who you see introduced at the start of the game in a like, full motion video when she sits down at the computer. And then the next thing we have access to Nina’s desktop so we are - kind of - Nina but we’re kind of also not-Nina. Uhm, and we can rifle through her pictures and her archived blog posts, uhm, and then eventually we get to open up this game called Valtameri which is sort of a Final Fantasy parody type thing, and we play Valtameri with this guy called Ichi, or Blake, uhm…

X: Spoiler he’s a creep.

C: Well. Arguably he’s a creep. Uhm. And we just talk to him. Aaaand… our other friends are messaging us while we’re playing but we’re not that interested, uhm. And we kind of have this cycle a few times where we play the game, and then we maybe send photos to Ichi or…maybe…I dunno what else happens but anyway there’s like three phases of the game and it takes place over a few months and then… that’s kind of… it. That’s the end of the game. I dunno. Anything to add?

X: Should we give a spoiler that at the end he lives in another state and he comes to see her, at the end…

C: Or us…

X: Or us… and then… they Have Sexxx. And then, the last bit of the game is him saying that it was a mistake, over the internet, and you see the last image of her at the computer looking very isolated and then it’s just the end of the game. Is that alright to say? The spoiler?

C: Yeah we’re not going to be able to talk about the game without saying that, so.

X: Yeah we need to say there’s unresolved tension at the end. Uhm…yes. That there’s no way to resolve.

C: Uhmmm yeah so it’s unusual, I mean, like I suppose some people at the time made a point about it’s not being a game you “play” so much as experience because you can’t really have any influence on it, it’s more just about exploring…the life that is presented to you.

X: And whatever influence that you do have, doesn’t really affect the main narrative. So you can do small little actions, like you can choose text that you say to people, but it doesn’t actually change anything that happens.

C: Yeah. You can’t make meaningful choices.

S: I did like that you can engage with, or not engage with, the background media as much as you wanted to. Because it’s got the interface of her desktop where you can look in her desktop folders, look at her selfies, pull up chatlogs all that kind of stuff. And you don’t have to in order to experience the game. And I liked that element of it because it was, I guess, immersive and, yeah. Again, it didn’t really influence the gameplay in any way. And you could safely assume that people would look at everything, because that’s kind of how most people play games. But, yeah, I thought that achieved the goal, which was to make it feel like you were her, on her computer.

X: Whereas for me I felt like, maybe as someone who doesn’t game quite as much – calling myself out here - but, the idea of going through those things maybe wasn’t as exciting for me so maybe I did speed through the game a bit more occupying Myself rather than the character of Nina. Maybe because I found looking through photos that were similar to photos I would have taken in 2008 deeply frustrating uhm, yeah. But it’s just different experiences I guess.

S: I found interesting in terms of, like, obviously this is a creative work that she’s made, so I came at it from the point of view of wondering about the inclusion of certain things. Like, why that photo as opposed to – I’m sure she has hundreds of photos of that time – like what does this photo or poem say about that time in her life that another photo taken in the same photo session didn’t? Or something like that, I mean, obviously everything that was included in the desktop interface was a deliberated choice and so I found that aspect interesting.

C: Hmm yeah, like someone else had made the point which wasn’t something that I’d picked up on but, that some of the photos were intentionally bad photos that were included, which I guess when we’re talking about the choice of presentation uhm. And her poetry and chatlogs and it’s this idea of airing your dirty laundry…

X: Well it’s still curated.

C: Yeah, very much so.

X: But, it’s very clear that there’s the intention there that it is a little bit more vulnerable than what you might just put online it’s like, yeah it’s more the sort of stuff you might just keep in a file somewhere on desktop, I guess there’s that vulnerability that you don’t normally get on a blog or Instagram or something like that.

S: And I guess that by being vulnerable she signposts to us as player or consumer in some ways that we should trust this as a confessional work.

X: Mhm. It does feel very much like rifling through someone’s diary, or…yeah that feeling of you’re totally not meant to look at someone’s phone, but there’s occasionally that impulse to do so, and it definitely feels like you’re doing something that’s…it’s kind of not okay, but within the game context…

S: Yeah. And so I find that interesting coz it’s kind of her giving us the phone and wiping everything on the phone other than the things that are on it, but the things that are on it are kind of not necessarily things that make her look the best, so I, yeah. It’s interesting from a curatorial point of view.

X: Mhm. Yeah it’s definitely curated from someone looking back at that self and being really honest. Which I find really interesting. And I haven’t really… again, not a huge gamer but I haven’t seen that in a game before, that really confessional, like, autobiographical…

C: Yeah. I mean it definitely comes from a place of there being not much autobiography in games and certainly not with this, uhm, mix of mediums that it’s sort of used where you’ve got this, like, video of the character which is played by the person who made the game who’s named the character after themselves and so it’s like…they’re acting as themselves, and then using bits from their life, and there’s a game element to it, and a movie element to it…and all these things are sort of slipping over. Whereas I think other autobiographical games have been more text based or uhm… traditional, in air quotes…

 [Music plays: excerpt from “turn on” by Decky Coss]

 X: So do you want to talk about…do we want to talk about what we did like and didn’t like…now?

C: Yeah. I find it — I guess I find it a really interesting game. And it’s almost like, for me, because it’s so unusual in so many ways it almost like …avoids the question, for me, as to whether or not it’s something “I like”. I guess what I liked about it is it’s something I haven’t really experienced elsewhere, uhm, it’s a very novel game to me. Like I do think it has identifiable shortcomings which I guess we’ll come to later, but, uhm…

X: So you like the experimentation of it?

C: Yeah. I do like the experimentation of it. I like the way it, uhm, mixes these things together and the way it plays with autobiography, which is another thing I’m sure we’ll talk more about it. I like it’s sound and visual kind of…the desktop artwork, it’s design. I have a basic appreciation of that I suppose.

X: She’s got a really strong aesthetic. I think that can be fully agreed upon. Sian, what about you?

S: I’ve never played online collaborative gaming like the kind of gaming this game is about and referencing, and that the game-inside-the-game is meant to, I guess, be a play on or be an example of. I… I found the game kind of rudimentary and not that enjoyable to play. As in the game “Valtameri”, uhm.

X: Also, I don’t think you even had to actually play it because Ichi was playing it…

S: Mhm, I couldn’t tell, I thought you did.

C: Yeah, I feel like if you did nothing it wouldn’t go forward at all…

S: Yeah I agree. But. I feel like it did what intended to do which was immerse you in the idea of being a person playing a game while listening to the audio of a story which is of people talking while playing a game, so it was effective in its aim in that sense, but it just wasn’t an enjoyable experience to actually play it. I found it boring and clunky.

X: I think I was beginning to dread having to go in there and do it, too.

S: Me too.

X: It’s almost like a meditative means to an end within the game. But the actual game itself is like…ugh. Just like, clicking. Like Diablo but…with worse monsters.

C: Yeah.

X: Does that make me sound really stupid?

C: No. I mean that’s what it is.

X: I think if…I think if there had been a little bit more, like, difference, so if it was a different kind of game, or if it was simple it was so simple it mirrored a game like Diablo or games like that…if it didn’t mirror a game like that it might be more interesting but I found myself clicking and just “oh I don’t want to play… I want to play an actual good game” and uhmm yeah

S: Yeah. I found it tedious and I found… I don’t know if it was just my Mac I was playing it on but I found it soooo clunky and awkward and like, to actually navigate inside the game was just a nightmare and so I was the same, I was dreading it every time I had to do that part.

C: Yeah I wonder like, uhm… if they had built Valtameri to be more interesting it would have detracted from the point of it which was I guess, uhm, the paying attention to the conversation or…

X: Well you’re forced to coz it’s so monotonous.

C: Yeah.

S: I was thinking the same thing. And I’m wondering if there was…I mean, there would be, there would be a way of having it simplistic in terms of goals and fighting and all that while also… not being as boring and annoying. But, yeah. I was also thinking the same thing in that because it was so straightforward it did give you that space to absorb the story better.

C: Yeah.

X: Mhm.

S: In terms of, like, bigger picture, I just didn’t really like the framing at the end. Which was, kind of the game ends and it leaves you with this message that… this is an experience of what first love is which I felt was, uhm, again a bit clunky and didn’t feel honest to me. Which I thought was interesting because the game itself is quite a vulnerable, confessional, honest game.

X: Yeah, it was very good at interrogating Nina, and very good at doing a lot of showing not telling but still interrogating the character of Ichi, but then… interrogating the relationship itself felt, like…yeah, when it said it was about first love… not… I dunno. Was it?

S: Yeeeah, you’re talking about a relationship that never was with someone you were never really with. Uhm, it was very unclear, I guess. And it was interesting – and I think most people have had relationships like this, online – where you’re communicating with someone primarily online and forming this relationship and this bond but also but kind of on one level… I guess, unsure as to where that relationship fits outside the box that is your computer.

X: Yeah, and I found that, actually, the whole premise of the game for me – as, like, someone who has left their early twenties, thankfully – of knowing that environment and knowing those people and that sort of relationship that gets built online, and as soon as we’re introduced to Ichi the character I wanted to just shut it down.

S: Mhm.

X: It was like “eurgh I know what’s going to happen, I… don’t want to be there for that”. And so there was that… again, I don’t know if it’s something I necessarily liked or disliked, I just found it a very confronting part of the game, that, I wasn’t sure… whether it was for me necessarily, or what the point of it would be for me to play.

C: Yeah, right. I feel like, that was really interesting for me actually, playing it this time, because I have played it once before back after it came out…I played it not long after… and I think my experience this time, it seemed a lot more like… obvious how, Ichi, the things he said seemed quite… bad. And I didn’t remember it being quite so bad. Like I felt like his actions were always questionable. But just the whole…like all of his dialogue…is

X: It’s very well done.

C: Oh it’s very well done. It seems very real.

X: But that’s the thing. If you’ve never been groomed online before. I dunno. Can I say he was grooming? I feel like it was kind of…

S: It wasn’t *not* grooming, it was…[sighs] it’s hard to tell, I mean, I guess. And that’s part of what’s interesting is that it’s her memories of how it happened and what their conversations were like, then portrayed by somebody else. So of course, we can only go on what we actually see but it’s referencing something that happened and probably what we’re listening to is quite different from what actually was being said, so that line is quite murky and unclear. I found it hard to tell exactly to what extent he knew what he was doing or even if he was doing anything other than just enjoying playing a game with someone who was showing him that kind of positive attention, like, a girl who was showing him that kind of attention. It was kind of unclear to me where he wanted it to go or even if he wanted it to go anywhere. She was kind of the one pushing them meeting up and things like that. I felt like he was toying with her, very much so. I don’t know whether I would say he was….hmm, I would say he was grooming her but I don’t know whether it was…

X: …a premeditated sort of predatory…

S: Yeah. Yeah.

X: Yeah, I think it’s quite interesting, thinking about that and where you are upon reflection making this dialogue, I guess as the maker of the game, as Nina did, it reminds me of…after we’d played the game, uhm, and I opened up my laptop and I got all my 2007 emails spat at me and, heaps of emails from old friends, and lots of guy friends talking about girl stuff, like putting in, like copy-pasting msn messenger chat things they’d had with girls like “I don’t know what this means, can you help?” And I was reading through, and it was very similar like baiting sort-of situations where someone’s like “well I’m not very good” and you’re like “no, you’re great!”. And like… very similar dialogue, where I’m sure these friends of mine were not predatory they were just, like, trying to get some affection, just being like – they must have been sixteen, seventeen at the time, like – really trying to figure out how to broach a like a sexual or romantically intimate relationship with somebody, and there’s just a lot of like, neediness in those conversations, that I forgot was a thing, until I got all those emails being like… oh we were so… like, if we now, in our late twenties to thirties messaged something like that, we’d be like… “you’re a freak”, like. You wouldn’t be able to say what we were saying back then. So yeah, I think it’s kind of interesting…what you’re saying, is that we assume that it’s predatory because as older people now, because that’s what it signifies but… when you’re younger…sometimes it can just be, like…

S: Yeah, on one level I felt like he was…just confused and out of his depth. Like this girl, that he’s obviously attracted to, and very much enjoying having the attention of, is then suddenly starting to push the line of, “well are we gonna meet up”, and he’s kind of thinking “Oh. She wants to meet up with me. I hadn’t actually thought…”. Like, it seemed like he’s just enjoying the online experience, and she’s the one who wanted to solidify things and meet up. From my memory I mean, I played it a couple of months ago. And then he’s kind of, it seemed maybe, internally wrestling with the idea of “do I want that? If I want that, it’ll obviously be beneficial for me in those certain ways”, but it’s obviously… most people, or at least most girls who have been through that wringer at least would be able to tell going into it that he didn’t actually…that there was not going to be a relationship, that he uhm… when he came to New York that wasn’t going to be a love story coming to fruition.

X: Yeah, totally.

S: But obviously she was engaging in these like fishing tactics too that we all did when you’re young and you try and feel out what’s actually happening: “Does this person like me? Do they not like me? Oh I’m ugly, I’m sure, oh…” you know, all that kind of bashful…

X: And, that as well, because you can see how vulnerable she is on her desktop, like you can see all those photos, and you can see the development of her sexualisation as well within the game because…it’s in three parts right? Where it goes, like, the first time, and then it’s a few months later, a few months later. And you can see every time the desktop refreshes she is like more sexualised, you can see her search history of things she’s looking through, you can see where it’s heading in her own mind. And there is those fishing tactics from both sides. It’d be really interesting to see, like, Ichi’s desktop as well. Like, I would love the other side of, what he’s looking at.

S: Yeah.

X: Because, for me, I can look at Nina’s desktop as long as I want – like, I get it. But I would love to know what he’s doing. And like, his intentions. Obviously, Nina doing that would be disingenuous. But it would be really interesting to have a game, of like, a 17-year-old boy’s desktop, and understanding where that headspace is.

S: I thought there were some interesting context clues, in the game, that were interesting on a few different levels, hinting at the idea that this was something he did with girls, that he kind of…played with them, that he was only interested in playing games with girls, obviously enjoying this attention. That was something that was I think said by at least one person she talked to, and possibly multiple people that she talked to was, oh. I kind of got the sense that she was new girl that he was “playing with”, in multiple senses.

X: And those things like, burned out, sort of.

S: Yeah. I kind of thought that context was interesting. Because, if you’ve been through this relationship, you have the ability to see what’s happening, which is why you and I both have a stronger feeling that this guy is in some ways… not necessarily predatory, but, in some ways manipulative and, just bad news. Just not… uncomfortable.

X: We’re playing through a pattern of behaviour that isn’t going to be healthy for either them…

S: Yeah, uhm, and so we can recognise that, it feels like we’re meant to recognise that, it feels like those clues are…they’re not even clues, it’s part of the dialogue, we can hear it, we can interpret it. And those context clues of other people referencing the fact that this has happened with other girls… well it seemed like what those other people were referencing.

C: Mhm.

S:  Those were deliberate things put in the game by Nina, which is interesting when you think about the way that she then frames the game at the end as “this is just a story about first love.”

X: Mhm. It’s…yeah, it’s confusing, definitely, because it’s kind of undermining like what you think she’s setting out to achieve, and almost like… is that just meant to be…a joke? How intentional is that? Did she not know how to wrap it up? Wrap up the story to resolve it all…

S: Yeah that’s what I was unclear of. It did almost feel like she felt it needed one final, like, “and this is what the game is” flagging. Whereas I thought it would be more powerful and interesting if she just left it the way it was but without that kind of final message.

X: Mhm.

S: And so in some ways I felt frustrated by that messaging because I’d interpreted it so differently, and I was then being told that my experiences were incorrect, I guess? That maybe I’d interpreted it wrong. It also made me sad for her that she was interpreting it in that first love sense. And it made me feel guilty for feeling sad for her [laughs] like it was…it was an interesting choice for her to kind of….in such a cerebral, experimental game, where you have the power to experience it the way you want, for then for her to tell you how it should be read was… an interesting choice.

X: Mhm, yeah, totally. Coz it almost makes you second guess, like oh was she not upset? Did he not just do something that was, like, not loving?

C: Yeah, I though that was… uhm, like, a weird bit of the author coming to then tell you what the game is about. But at the same time it reminded me of – I recently read a memoir by Michelle Tea, Passionate Mistakes – and in it she talks about… there’s a scene where she says one of her early boyfriends, she says, that telling him “I love you” was like, a code for “we can have sex now”. And I thought that like, in the context of this game being kind of, like… I think Nina does the same thing in Act 2, she says “I love you”, like,  “I think I love you”, and then it’s… it’s part of the development of the relationship and it’s like heading towards having sex for the first time. Uhm, and that kind of being framed as…maybe that’s more of an American thing? Like, a code, I dunno.

X: Nooo, it’s not.

[Laughter]

X: It’s not an American code. Unless I am American.

C: Or is it a teenage code?

X: It’s definitely, I dunno for me it’s definitely a teenage code.

C: Sure.

X: I think it was, another book that I was reading recently, and talked about constantly while I was reading it…was it Minor Characters by Joyce Johnson? Yeah. That’s the one.

C: I guess we can edit in the correct title later.

[Laughter]

X: And she…it’s like a beat memoir of a women during the beat era, and she dated Jack Kerouac, and it’s saying that…during that era, and I mean still it holds true, but like, women, or young girls are taught to safe guard their virginity, and boys are taught to safeguard themselves, and that idea of love being… like, giving, giving way to something that you can lose yourself to. And I think that it 100% feels like that, like when women say - when girls say - “I love you”, it’s like, very much about that idea of safeguarding their bodies.

C: Right.

X: And, yeah, I don’t know where else to go from there. But it’s very…it’s not just American, I think it’s like, across the board. In like, early relationships.

C: Okay.

S: Mhm.

X: What do you think, Sian?

S: I dunno, it was… I don’t necessarily have any opinion about the sexual element to it. I guess I feel like I got the sense that she wanted to have sex, like that was something she wanted to do, she was ready for and thinking about, and thinking was kind of her way of accessing that, in some ways. Uhm. Mhm. I was sort of…was very unclear of his… thinking, I guess, and what he was thinking about, where he was coming from, who he was as a character. Just, I didn’t get a sense specifically of who he was. Like I feel like I’ve probably met gamer guys like him… it… She gave us some ideas but I also… I think what you were saying in wanting to see his desktop was interesting because we got such a clear idea of who she was but we didn’t get any of that from the actual audio, from the actual in-game experience of them chatting. They didn’t talk about their life, pretty much at all. So, everything we learnt of her we got from her desktop. So, we didn’t get that same chance to learn who this guy was. What he did outside this game. Where he lived, who he lived with, what he studied. We didn’t get any of that. And I think, hmm, I agree with you – I don’t think she could have added that, I think it would have been disingenuous and it would have been against the point of what the game actually was as experimental memoir basically.

X: Hmm. But I also think with so many gamer guys as, uh, as a woman who has dated a lot of gamer guys, I think that…especially during that time when you’re just going into university, you are like plumbing for depth, like emotional depth in people that you’re dating, and often it’s just not developed yet, like, I dunno. From experience I think that, this guy I honestly just think – like I know I said his behaviour felt like it was grooming, but – he just, maybe, as well, had no idea what he was doing.

S: I kind of – yeah, I got that sense as well. I mean, I think he knew what he was doing in terms of fostering her attention, but in the larger picture I don’t think he was a particularly deep or interesting person.

[Laughter]

X: I remember… I dated this guy – anecdote! We can cut this out – uhm, but I dated this guy when I was like 17, and it was my first year of uni, I met him in my maths class – shoutout, you know who you are! Uhm… and he… I remember like in the first week of us dating he said that he missed his bus stop because he was thinking, and I was like “oh my god, he’s so deep, he like missed his bus because he was Thinking” and I, like, “I wonder what he was thinking about, probably me, how amazing I am”.

[Laughter]

X: And then maybe a month later or like two months later, he was like “oh yeah I missed my bus stop again”, and I was like “oh what were you thinking about?”. And he was like “oh you know, just what everyone said during the day”. [Laughs]. Like he was just, no further reflection. Just what everyone said in sequential order, and it was just that moment of like, oh… you weren’t, it wasn’t… there was no depth to the thought, you were just daydreaming about the sequence of events during the day, uhm. And that moment of, like, disillusionment was quite… upsetting.

S: Mhm.

X: But yeah I feel like that’s what we could have done during this game, is that we’ve turned him into this guy that’s like…. well, for me, definitely I’ve like, in my head while I was playing it, I was like “what a piece of trash”, like. But he probably just logs off and twiddles his thumbs, and, I don’t know… plays Fortnite.

S: Yeah it’s kind of like that, I don’t know. I was gonna say meme. I feel like there’s tik-toks about it where girls are like “urr I wonder what he’s thinking or why he’s not messaging me back” and he’s literally just playing games or asleep or just…outside! And there’s no greater mystery to it, it’s just that he’s not currently texting you, coz he’s a boy, and they’re boring!

[Laughter]

X: Mhm, yeah.

S: But yeah I totally agree that uhm…of having had so many times that experience of having had so many times that experience of just assuming people must be thinking these larger internalised thoughts like there’s this whole world of them we’re not accessing and that felt…I felt like that as well while playing this game. Or I felt her feeling that, while playing this game.

X: Totally, coz there’s so much of her planning in there. So much of her planning flights and looking at prices of flights and things like that. And it’s like, she’s putting so much energy into, and like I’m sure he had not even googled a flight until…

S: I don’t even think he was thinking about them meeting up really until she kind of…started, felt like she was…not pushing it but…

X: She was giving ultimatums kind of…

S: Yeah.

C: Which I mean, fair enough.

X: Yeah.

 [Music interlude: excerpt from “what would happen if we met” by Decky Coss]

 C: So…uhm, we sort of touched on it before but like, “who is this game for?” is a question that Xanthea you suggested we should talk about.

X: Yep.

C: Possibly because you didn’t think – not to put words in your mouth –

X: Put ‘em in.

C: - but you weren’t sure, like, you weren’t sure if this game had a target, or that if there was a particular set of people that should be playing this, or like. I dunno, what were your thoughts?

X: Yeah I dunno, I just felt like, especially by the end of it when it was…or even as I started it, and hearing the dialogue, I knew what was going to happen. And I felt that…like sitting and playing – I wouldn’t have finished playing if I wasn’t playing with you, Connor, because…I was like “I know what’s going to happen…”

C: Yeah.

X: “and it’s going to be annoying”…like “it’s going to irritate me”. So…yeah. I think that it’s… you don’t go into playing this game for like, excellent gameplay, or like…I, I dunno. I think it’s an experiment, and it’s a worthy and valid experiment of a game, uhm. But as a standalone, I’m not sure… if I’m like “cool I feel entirely satisfied, as a, as a consumer of this game”. Like I want there…coz it is that experiment, now I want something else to come out that’s inspired by it…

S: Mhm.

X: Does that make sense?

S: I sort of felt like… uh, I guess as wanky as it might sound, I sort of felt that it’s just a piece of art, and it didn’t need or even have a specific target audience, it was just created for art’s sake. And I guess if I had to say who it was for, I guess, people who enjoy immersive, experimental gameplay but… yeah I’m kind of the same mind in that I’m excited by it as a starting off point, in terms of gaming.

X: Unless we sell it to the government and they lock teenage boys in rooms and make them play it.

C: Do you think there’s like an educational element where teenage boys should play it and understand, that like…?

X: I dunno that girls are real people? Maybe.

[Laughter]

X: That’s another – okay, another boyfriend that i had, once, two months into dating the next boyfriend - everyone goes to take a drink - he said, uhh, “I didn’t realise that girls had feelings until I started dating you”, which was, like, the most –

S: Did you break up with him immediately?

X: No, we dated for a year and a half.

S: But he didn’t know women were…he didn’t know girls were people.

X: I know!

S: That’s scary!

X: And he dated a lot of women before me. Uhm…and yeah! But maybe I’m coming at it from a radicalised point of view, given my dating history.

[Laughter]

X: But yeah, I think that this game for like, Sian and I – and Connor as well I guess – is like, preaching to the converted that these relationships, these early relationships being fraught and problematic and, like… very difficult to navigate. Yeah, so, as you said, it does feel more as a piece of artwork acknowledging all those issues. But at the same time, I think it does have a message that feels…interesting. I just don’t think a young boy would pick it up and be like “I can’t wait to play this game!”

S: Mhm. I think I would love to have a conversation with a bunch of girls at different points in their life, like a fifteen-year-old girl and a seventeen-year-old girl and a nineteen-year-old girl. Like find out what someone thinks when they’re in the middle of these kind of relationships, playing this game, like…do they recognise it? Do they have thoughts about as being manipulative, or uhm, that kind of fishing idea that they’re both doing, engaging in that kind of fishing behaviour… I’d be really interested to know what I would have said about the game, when I was eighteen.

X: Yeah. I think if I was playing it at eighteen I would have a lot more internalised misogyny, of just being like “oh she was just super needy and”…

S: Mhm. And I think… it’s so hard to say, like, would…would I have felt more impacted by it? Would I have felt more called out by it? Would I have felt more seen, or…would I have wanted to… I think I probably would have read it the same way that Nina is now telling us to read it, which is as a love story, because…that’s kind of…I would have been closer to Nina’s, I guess, idea of who she was when she was…when we are Nina in this game. I think that’s what I would have…would have been my experience as an eighteen-year-old.

X: Hmm…

S: So it’s kind of interesting, I think I would have… shipped them. As it were.

X: Totally.

C: Yeah right?

X: And would have focussed a lot more on him being like, he’s so like…he’s so cute, or like… kind of getting really into that idea that’s like oh yeah… and like, actively shipping, as you say.

S: Mhm, picking up on things he said that indicated he was interested, as opposed to now, when your bullshit meter is just going Off The Charts.

X: Totally! Every, every bit…like literally the first game you play it’s like “ew, go away.”

[Laughter]

X: “Where is the option to never play with this guy ever again? Oh wait, it doesn’t exist. It’s the whole game. How horrible for you Nina”.

C: Yeah I remember you saying that you felt almost like a bit trapped by it, by the fact that you can’t get out of it, like you have to experience this…not, not that it’s necessarily trauma, but like-

X: Yeah it’s traumatic! And you…I mean, every line that he was saying was like ugh, it felt so close to…things…I’ve heard online because I was quite a vulnerable teenager, who was constantly fishing for things online – call myself out, hundred percent. And yeah, it’s very challenging to go back and look at somebody doing that and not being able to, within gameplay, do anything about that.

S: Mhm.

X: Like sit her down and be like. “Nina. We need to have a talk about this. You’re fine. Chill out. Go for a walk. This guy’s…not good.” Like, yeah, I dunno I think, uhm…coz you yeah I dunno I think I very much… immediately saw that and it frustrated me.

C: Yeah. That’s fair.

X: But, I mean, if it’s a work of art that’s okay! It’s allowed to frustrate.

S: I think that feeling of being trapped is interesting coz I had that same sense of being locked in, uhm, but at the same time I think that feeling is an effective one in making you feel immersed in this person’s life. Like it really…because I guess, you are locked in and because of the desktop element and because of the kind of immersing gameplay it really felt like you were experiencing this person’s life in a way that…I’m not sure whether it would have been as effective if you could kind of pause and click out and stop.

 [music interlude: “cibele” by Decky Coss]

 C: Uhm, I guess one final thing we can talk about is, this idea of it being autobiographical or not? Or where it kind of sits on that spectrum – I suppose because this isn’t something that’s been done so much in games uhm… we were kind of looking at the idea of it being “autofictional” because it’s taking the idea of, the intentional blending of something that happened in the life of the creator so it’s sort of like memoir, but it’s also an intentional, uhm, saying that it is not totally autobiographical because it’s not using certain elements, or it’s recreating certain elements. Uhm, so I dunno – Sian, because you are the autofiction expert in the room, what was your kind of idea about how it was positioning itself?

S: Uhm, I would say…on one level I would be inclined to say it didn’t read as autofiction to me because it just felt like it was a retelling of something that happened, it didn’t feel like we were meant to suspend our disbelief or that we were meant to uhm, assume that anything that happened didn’t happen exactly as it happened – I got the sense that it was almost in some ways quite literal. I dunno. I think I would have to think a lot harder about this. I think autofiction’s interesting because a lot of the time it relies on what you already know about the creator…

C: Yeah right.

S: …which is an interesting kind of thing to have to consider as a reader, and also as a writer of autofiction is…when you’re flagging something as inherently false, how is your reader or player or consumer meant to pick up that it is inherently false, if they don’t happen to know you? If they don’t know what actually happened, how do they know that this is you playing with the truth? Will they assume this is true? I’m not sure she put anything in there that we were meant to assume didn’t happen. I’m not sure she was playing with the truth – I think she was trying to get at the truth. But without knowing more about her I suppose it’s really hard to make that call.

X: Was it ever acknowledged to be based on true events at the beginning?

S: I think it was.

C: Yeah I think so and maybe not in the game specifically except for that author’s note at the end where it’s kind of like, suddenly not Nina the character speaking to you, it’s Nina who made the game – I think that’s the only time in the game where it acknowledges that the game was based on true events. But uhm, like, outside the game there have been interviews and articles that have been “this is a game about my first experience of like, hooking up with someone from the internet.”

X: Yeah coz it kind of feels like – who’s that author who wrote Sour Heart?

S: Oh, Jenny Zhang?

X: Yeah, Jenny Zhang, when she came to Australia and did an interview at Wheeler Centre she was talking about how frustrated she is that all of her fiction – even though it’s definitely fiction – is always assumed to be autobiographical…

S: Mhm.

X: Just coz she’s writing about, like, a demographic of her own experience it’s just assumed… and I think it’s like, kind of similar here. It’s like, does it matter if it’s autobiographical? Does it matter how much is true and how much it’s not? This is kind of more a universal truth of internet, uhm, intimacy. And like, I think that is enough to be a valid – frustrating, uhm, but valid, still…

S: If I was gonna think of where I would position it from a literature perspective – because that’s what I know, and that’s what I do — is, it is quite reminiscent of I Love Dick in some ways. It’s very confessional, it’s telling the story of someone’s relationship with someone else who doesn’t get a chance to…weigh in, I guess, and it is a retelling. It’s using real artefacts, I guess, with reimagined, and in some cases hyper-realistic…mmm

X: Re-enactments.

S: Yeah. So I think, that’s where I would position it. In terms of when thinking about literature which is what I do.

C: Yeah. Yeah, I guess, Xanthea you’re more of a memoir fan? Uhm..

X: Yeah. I love a good memoir.

C: You prefer it to…you prefer things that are passing things off as fully truthful? Or some version of…the truth?

X: Yeah “fully truthful”…whatever that is. Uhm. I like things that aim to be truthful. And I like things that interrogate themselves enough to feel like…anything that’s passed off as “this is entirely what happened, the truth”, I don’t believe… but uhm. Yeah. I think at this point it doesn’t matter who made it – for me, this has a larger truth to it, in some ways.

C: The universal experience…

X: I think it is getting at a universal experience of like, internet intimacy.

C: So you don’t… so it doesn’t matter if like, that experience, is making a claim to like, “this was my experience”? Like this is… or…

X: Honestly, I don’t think it matters. Like, uhm. I think it’s kind of beyond the point. And I think it’s why I’m more interested in stuff that’s made because of this work. It’s just kind of opening up to more conversations.

C: Yeah, sure.

S: I think I really…probably the reason I like autofiction as a literary genre, is because it interrogates that idea that you were saying of…does it matter or not matter if it’s true or not? I like work that plays with that idea, and I think this work is probably important because it does feel true, it feels like her version of events. And I think, I would definitely love to see more games that interrogate that idea of truth versus untruth. And I think…I haven’t played a lot of games like this, but I’m not super across all the games. I don’t know a lot of things. I play Animal Crossing, and the Sims, and Stardew Valley. And I don’t have, y’know, a large library, but when I do find experimental games like this I do seek them out, and I would be very interested to see what builds off this. I think in terms of that idea of does it matter if this is really her experience, I’m thinking of games like Emily is Away -

C: Yeah for sure.

S: Where, it’s very similar in some ways of, like, that experience of being on the desktop, being in the chatlog, having these conversations… And it is a different experience in terms of how, what you get out of playing that game versus playing Cibele.

X: Yeah and I think as well, uhm, making games around experiences that are, I guess popularly more marginalised, having that ability to play with truth and how much we know about things is kind of important. I’m just thinking back to a few months ago when I was really obsessed with Ned Kelly and there was lots of “based on truth” sort of, fictionalised accounts of Ned Kelly, but also, there are fictionalised accounts of like, the women in his life as well, so there’s novels around that. And how, I found, all of those novels coming together, all of those fictionalised entities coming together, it didn’t even matter at the end whether it was true or not, I just got a really interesting viewpoint of someone who has created so much drama and intensity and how that had affected other people. And I find that really, like, just as valid in terms of storytelling as someone claiming this to be the whole truth of like, a biography of Ned Kelly, which, I’ve never really gained much from. But, like, a fictionalised account of sister, I found really really interesting coz it was like, looking at, how…now I’m just talking about Ned Kelly. I’m gonna stop. I’m sorry. Uhm.

[Laughter]

S: What I liked about this game was that it felt aggressively female. And I mean, it is, it’s aggressively female, it’s aggressively confessional, and I think the gaming world needs more of that and I think it does, in some ways, carve out a little patch of internet or game, as it was, and opens a door. It starts a dialogue about what games can be – or continues a dialogue I suppose, I wouldn’t necessarily say it starts a dialogue but… I think the more people who understand that games can be for them, and games can be kind of art and games can be whatever they want and games can tell a story and games can be for women who have been made to feel that games weren’t for them by men, the better. Not that that’s what was happening here, but I can see that this game would make someone who had been made to feel that way feel that “oh games can be female” and that’s great and fun and cool.

X: I think that’s a good place to start, I mean finish, not start, finish.

C: Alright, so…

S: Let’s do it all over again!

C: Yeah, I think so too.

X: Any more final words?

S: Mmm, this has made me wanna follow Nina Freeman more and see what her other games are like. I haven’t played her other games, I feel like… it might be worth…

C: Oh yeah!

X: The date one is sick. [Laughs] I love the date one.

C: The date one, yeah, we played that? We Met in May, the recent one.

S: Oh wait, I have actually…

X: It’s absurd, I love it. You make a boy do weird things with his arms.

C: Yeah! There’s like a game where you grab his nipples…

X: Yeeeah, my dream.

S: Ohhh, I think I’ve played one of her other games which is basically just a very, very simple one.

C: How Do You Do It?

S: Yeah yeah I’ve played How Do You Do It, that was fun.

X: That’s funny actually, because, when we were playing it, I was like, “let’s make a game, this is like…I’ll play this game! I’ll play this game forever. Like. Give me a nipple-grabbing game.” Uhm…yay!

C: Yay!

S: Woo.

X: Thanks Nina…sorry we were so critical of your game.

[Laughter]

C: Yeah, uhhh, thankyou Sian, for doing this, and also thankyou Xanthea, for doing this.

S: I’ll see you when you get up to ‘E’ for Emily is Away.

X: I’m a sound person!

[Podcast theme plays]

Survey #226

“i couldn't take my eyes off her, but that's not what i took off that night.”

So, how are you doing today? I'm mostly fine, I guess. I'm sooooo sleep-deprived from these damn night terrors, so it has me pretty moody. Then I'm bummed as all fuckhell that Sara and I can't be together on our anniversary. What is the last song that you had on repeat? I think it waaaas... "Idiosyncrasy" (it took me five million attempts to spell that right) by Korn. Are you a hedonist/masochist/in between? Neither. The best musical performance you’ve been to? I've only ever seen Alice Cooper, but it was WICKED. He did his signature decapitation illusion (how the fuck does that even work??), and the last song (it was a fucking amazing cover of "Another Brick In The Wall") had INCREDIBLE theatrics. I loved it. Who is your favorite drummer? *shrugs* Your favorite guitarist? Idk, really. Maybe Zakk Wylde. A vocalist with the best voice? Freddie Mercury's voice is so versatile and chill-inducing, Amy Lee is an obvious answer, Patrick Stump's voice is just so goddamn sexy, as is Brendon Urie's, as well as wide in vocal range. Do you have a band yourself? Maaaan, that'd be dope. But no. Do you write poetry or song lyrics? I used to write poems aaaaaall the time (y'know, the "I'm 14 and this is deep" kind), and I've actually really wanted to for a while now, but idk about what. Plus my word-weaving capability has drastically declined, so all I'd do is get mad. Your best memories: Meeting Sara, SARA'S FUCKING FACE WHEN SHE SAW ME IN HER BEDROOM ON HER LAST BIRTHDAY OH MY FUCKING GOD, a novel of things with Jason, seeing meerkats at the zoo for the first time, THE DAY GOD NOTICED ME THROUGH A GIF I WORKED WAY TOO HARD ON (I couldn't sleep for three days, and I wish I was kidding), uhhhh. A lot. Your worst memories: The night of the breakup, absolutely and entirely. Nothing compares. It was a slow, paralyzing trauma (don't get pissy about me using that word "as an exaggeration," it was diagnosed as such years ago) that entirely put me into an actual state of shock. I wish that night on absolutely nobody. No one. Funniest thing you've ever seen an animal do? Maaaaan, I could tell you a lot. Probably inarguably the funniest was Ginger (ex's beagle) WITHOUT FAIL losing her shit with jealousy or SOMETHING whenever she noticed Jason and I were doing anything that involved affection without her. That dog would LOSE IT with barking, tail wagging, and climbing all over him, and it was never not funny to see this fatass little dog turn into a living cockblock lmfao. OH YEAH then our late boxer Cali could be baited into howling if you did it sometimes. It was so, so cute. She'd always look so confused but do it anyway. I'm sure there're others; I've grown up with pets my whole life, but those are the only two that come to me now. What is on your mind? I wanna see Sara. Could you ever cheat on your significant other? I physically couldn't stand myself if I ever did. No. Ever been so disgraced that you had homicidal thoughts? Wow no. If so, whom did you wish to assassin? I mean I've talked about Ashley (not my sister) before, but they weren't seriously "homicidal." I wasn't going to actually do anything. If you wish to be famous, what would you want to be famous for? I don't wish it, but let's say I was. Some form of artist. ... Wait, I do want that. Errrmmm OH! A serious wildlife conservator. Do you think humanity is going downhill? Duh. What was the last thing you threw at someone? I have no clue. Do you ever want to be prom queen/king? I didn't care. Have you ever ran from the police? I'd prefer to stay out of jail. Are you afraid of clowns? No. Have you ever written on someone’s face in your yearbook? Ha ha yeeeaaah... When was the last time you made dinner? me?????? cook????????????? huh?????????????? Do you have any special plans coming up? I'm shooting my sister's gender reveal Sunday. :') Ash and her husband don't know the gender, so I am so fucking excited to see their reactions. Who do you want to be buried next to? Please don't bury me and just take up space. Cremate me and scatter the ashes somewhere, or do SOMETHING meaningful and creative. What is your favorite fish? Like... to eat? I haven't tried very much, but I liked striper forever and ever ago. If you mean visually, probably betta fish. Have you ever won a gold medal? Probably with kid stuff. Do you have any trophies? Also as a kid for A honor roll, as well as dance and sports overall. Do you work out? Oops no. When you introduce yourself, do you give hand shakes? It depends on who I'm talking to. Is there a limit to how many best friends you have? No? Do you have any hickeys on you? Bitch a girl can wish. Do you have the strength to say goodbye forever? Been there, finally done that. Will you talk to the person you like tonight? I talk to her every day throughout the day. Who did you last share a bed with? Sara. Who do you go to when you need to talk to someone? Sara or Mom. Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance? No. What are you listening to right now? I'm not actually listening to anything, but "Gypsy" by Fleetwood Mac is BURIED into my head rn. What do you like better: hot chocolate or hot apple cider? I've never tried to latter actually, but I'd probably still prefer hot chocolate, anyway. Do you make wishes at 11:11? No; I don't believe in that stuff. I have a friend who posts JUST "11:11 <3" or something like that every night on FB, and while it shouldn't, it annoys the fuck out of me. No one cares. Ever been on a golf cart? Yeah. Do you get blizzards where you live? No, never to the point where "blizzard" fits. What’s a biblical truth that you struggle with? lmao When was the last time you did something rebellious? *shrugs* Do you rebel against God a lot? I can genuinely say I don't give a fuck if I do or don't. Do you consider yourself creative? Very. What’s an old hobby that you want to pick back up? Sigh, reading. Do you ever read books to a pet? No. That seems without real purpose... and this is coming from me, an animal worshiper, just about. Like, you know they genuinely have no clue what you're saying or doing, and I highly doubt they're gonna stay still and look at the pictures. Do you have any pets? Two dogs, a cat, a rat, and a snake. What was the theme of your childhood bedroom? It didn't have a set theme. Partially because I grew up with the same room as my little sister, and we had very different interests. What color was your nursery as a baby? I have zero clue. Did I even have a proper nursery??? What was the last surgery you had? Getting a cyst above my asscrack removed lmaoooo. What’s something you prefer to keep private? Sexual history. I am very, very shy talking about that kind of stuff. Who is someone you look up to? *sobs "fischfuck" at the top of my lungs* As a child, did you have people you admired? STEVE IRWIN WAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY EMOTIONAL DAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Are you good at prioritizing? Eek... I'm unsure, to be honest. Which holiday is your favorite to decorate for? fuckin' Halloween hoe. Which holiday or season has the best decorations in stores? Soooo Halloween decor=room decor for me tbh lol. Who’s the prettiest YouTuber you watch? She doesn't have her own active YT channel anymore, but Suzy Hanson (GameGrumps' Arin's wife) is a fucking goddess. Oh, and while I've never watched her channel, I've seen Hannah Hart on GMM quite a few times, and she's actually one of my first signals that I wasn't straight because I definitely felt attracted to how naturally beautiful she is. What’s the most shocking thing that’s occurred in your life lately? Finding out my grandma has terminal cancer. How’s the weather been at your part of the world in the past week? It's been fucking hot. Thursday was the hottest October day in NC history, peaking at 100. Disgoostiiiiiing. Have you given something up recently? (for ex., candy, red meat etc.) Uhhhh well, this is semi-recently, I guess: I entirely stopped going to Chick-fil-a in protest of higher-ranking business employees or whatever supporting/making donations to anti-LGBT cults, especially conversion "therapy." What’s the worst thing about autumn? "How fleeting it is. I never feel like I get properly immersed in the experience. I blink and the leaves are gone and Thanksgiving is here and Christmas is right around the corner." <<< Perfect description. What is something you enjoy doing, even if you’re not very good at it? Drawing portraits, maybe. Do you work hard for your money? I don't have a job, never have had a stable one. However, on the occasion I'm hired to take pictures, I. Try. Really. Hard. What’s a song that most people interpret entirely wrong? "Mama I'm Coming Home" by Ozzy Osbourne was first to come to mind; reasonably, people tend to think the song is about his mother, but it's rather about his wife. Calling your wife that is apparently some English petname. When’s the last time you had cake? Wow, idk, actually. I think my niece mighta had some for her birthday in June? I know my nephew had cupcakes. Yeah, I think it was her b-day. Have you ever made your own soda from scratch? I have not. How about your own jam? No. Or pickled something? No. Did you grow anything in your garden this year? No, we don't have one. Or did someone give you something they grew in theirs? No. What’s the most romantic gift anyone’s given to you? Uhhhhhhhhhh idk. Do you like woolly socks? If so, do you ever make your own? NO, especially when you put sneakers over them or something. They feel so constricted. Do you have a laptop or desktop computer? A laptop that needs to be replaced, gah. Or fixed. I have a pure black crack and blob stretching across the left side of my screen that is super distracting and obscuring, and the right side of the top half is cracked along the side; I have duct tape to help keep it closed. Otherwise it's a fine laptop, though. Oh wait, and the apostrophe key is missing, so I have to hit the plastic pressure thingy that's easy to miss. Do you watch America’s Got Talent? No. If so, who has been your favorite contestant on AGT? My favorite ever was Landau Eugene Murphy Jr. Still have some of his covers on my iPod. Prince Poppycock is also my gay uncle that I would die for. What chore are you behind on? I need to dust my room good lort. Have you ever broken your phone screen? No, actually. Have you ever broke your computer screen? Well, refer to earlier question. I don't know if it's technically "broke," just damaged (it's not an actual scratch, btw; it's beyond the exterior screen). I need to take it somewhere to fix it ahhhhh. What department store do you shop at the most? Wal-Mart. Do you normally use the self-checkout or the regular checkout? Depends on how much we have. If it's just a handful or so, we just go do it ourselves. Which friend will be in your heart no matter what happens between you two? Sara, Megan. What is your most severe allergy? Pollen. Have you ever been kicked out of a store? No. OH SHIT NO WAIT, I THINK a friend and I may have wandered into Spencer's once when we were "too young." Or maybe we just got ID'd. Idk, idr. What was the stupidest mistake of your life? Turning a person into my sole source of "real" happiness, giving my entire soul to a flawed human being, being naive about love, all that jazz. Have you ever unfriended a sibling on social media? Well, she unfriended me. We're friends again now tho I think I pissed her off again. Oops. Do you watch Niki and Gabi on YouTube? If yes, which twin is your favorite: Niki or Gabi? I've heard of 'em, but don't know anything about/watch them. What was your favorite book you had to read for school? The Outsiders. The Handmaid's Tale is now right behind it. What do you want for your birthday this year? My '19 birthday has already passed, but if you mean like, my next one, idk. Maybe a new phone considering mine is GODawful with so many problems. Alllllthough I'm entirely aware I'll be putting a tattoo first, so... it depends on what I have, ha ha. Do you like rock music? Yep. What is the most beautiful landscape you have ever seen? MOUNTAINS!!!!!!!!!! What do you usually take for headaches? Advil/Ibuprofen. Have you ever switched doctors because of mistreatment? Or moreso carelessness and immeasurable ignorance masked by over-confidence. Do you film or record your doctor’s appointments? ??????????????????????????????? Can you even do that?????????????????? Which accomplishment are you most proud of yourself for? So, this kinda depends. I'm most likely to say "recovery," but I honestly give almost all credit to my psychiatrist and therapists. So I don't usually see *me* as playing a big role in it. Idk. So other days I'll say way more confidently graduating in the top 10% of the graduating class as a senior. Do you feel like you’ve accomplished anything yet with your life? Well yeah. What is your favorite medication that you take, and why? The combination I take of Vraylar + Lamictal due to how they interact and being massively responsible for me being stable. What is your favorite vitamin, and why? Do people???????????? have fave vitamins????????????????? List 5 people you know who have never been mean to you. Uh. I think Connie is it out of the people I know well/have known for a long time, lol. Would you rather do a craft project or a science experiment? s c i e n c e  b i t c h Do you say garbage, trash, rubbish, or something else? "Trash," usually. Which Bratz doll was your favorite? I didn't have a favorite. Which Barbie doll was your favorite? ^ Which American Girl doll was your favorite? I don't remember. Do you decorate Mason jars? No, but I find them veeeeeery pretty when decorated well. What color band and stone does your class ring have? I didn't get one. Can you see the mountains from where you live? No, I wish... What is your favorite Lisa Frank character? angel!!!!!!!!!!!! KITTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do you believe in the power of prayer? Not in the slightest. What color eyes does the person you like/love have? Are they pretty? A beautiful brown. Obviously if I call them beautiful. What was the first television show you were obsessed with? Pokemon cries. I never really like... showed just how much though. Looking back on when I was a kid, I took embarrassment poorly even then. Other girls thought I was weird for bringing a Psyduck plushy with me to school everyday, everyone in pre-k looked at me like "huh" when I brought my little Snorlax plush in for show-and-tell, I came to a point of only watching it when my sister was asleep, I was too scared to ask for the games, and- jfc okay I'm actually realizing I need to go back to therapy to talk about how deep my AvPD truly is rooted oops lmao. Do you eat chili when you get a hot dog, or do you like it plain? Chili is disgusting. Have you ever disowned anyone in your family? For what reasons? No. Is there anyone out there who has hurt you so much, you wish they’d die? No. Has anyone ever called you a sociopath before? No. How many times have you been drunk in your life? None got to the point of me feeling *actually* drunk. I've only ever been tipsy. When was the last time you acted really immature? *shrugs* Can you rely on one or more people to take up for you? Yeah, a few. When is the last time you sat around a campfire? I don't have a clue. Is there an important event coming up at your school? I think? It's some event all freshmen have to attend to all damn day and I'm not looking forward to it. It's for a good cause, but. It's gonna be a drag and I've had two incidents this school year of once collapsing and just last week almost fainting and vomiting just from the heat. Do you have a back-up career choice? What is it? Something with writing, I guess. Well, I ideally want to be a professional photographer but also a zoologist, but if photography goes absurdly well (this is incredibly unlikely, I know, but it's doable), I may not aim for a zoologist career, but get the necessary degree for it as back-up. I want an unquestionably stable back-up choice. My minor is Journalism, so like I mentioned up top, yeah, if things really go shitty, something in writing is an option. Would you ever get caught with a fake ID? No. Do you think religion justifies treating people unequally? I don't see the supposed "rationality" in this at all. No. Are men more attractive with longer or shorter hair? I guess it depends on the person, but I think I'm generally more attracted to men with longer hair. What color was the ink of the last pen you used? Black. Is there a name that you hear and cringe? I can't really say "cringe," but without fail, it's obvious who and what I think of the moment I hear the name "Jason," and it always causes this dull pain in my chest. What color are your dad’s eyes? They're dark brown. When you were a kid, was there a boy/girl that you said you were going to marry? No. Is your favourite TV show very popular? That '70s Show is, and Fullmetal Alchemist is among anime fans, at least. I don't think too many people know about Meerkat Manor, but I know it was and possibly still is Animal Planet's highest-grossing series, so it sure was big for viewers of that channel. What are you absolutely determined to do? Become at least a semi-successful photographer, make a great life with Sara, support my mom one day like she always has me, mostly overcome anxiety, photograph and touch a habituated meerkat of the KMP... a handful of things. Where would you rather be from? Somewhere in the U.S. that's not a homophobic, racist, gun-fucking, Bible-thumping cesspit of closed-minded shits. I love NC. How often do you play sports? Never. What website do you visit most often? YouTube. What do you wish you knew more about? Politics. What are some things you’ve had to unlearn? I stopped this as a young teenager, but I know I was one of those kids who used "retarded" as a substitute for "stupid." I absolutely hate that shit. I also had to unlearn uhhhh... man, I know there's a lot, I'm just blanking right now. What TV channel doesn’t exist but really should? *shrug* Where is the most interesting place you’ve been? Interesting to me personally, Chicago. Cities that massive are foreign to me. What fad or trend do you hope comes back? Scene fashion was art, don't @ me. What’s the best way to start the day? SLEEPY CUDDLES W/ YOUR S/O. What kind of art do you enjoy most? Man, idk. I love art so much. What have you only recently formed an opinion about? That's a good question. What is the most heartwarming thing you’ve ever seen? Literally today/yesterday when I watched the secret stream Mark did of gathering viewers to anonymously destroy random but small Twitch streamers' charity goals & he was too motivated and inspiring & everyone was so fucking confused but thankful and it was literally the most inarguably Chaotic Good thing I have ever borne witness to. For three hours I couldn't stop fucking smiling. What’s something you like to do the old-fashioned way? Hell if I know. Who has impressed you most with what they’ve accomplished? lol guess How do you relax after a hard day of work? I don't work. What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch? TV show? 13 Reasons Why is a hell no. The Human Centipede I wouldn't watch over my dead fucking body. Where would you spend all your time if you could? All my time? Idk. What’s the best way a person can spend their time? Improving the world. What’s the most interesting piece of art you’ve seen? I couldn't even try to answer that question. What’s worth spending more on to get the best? I dunno, probably a lot. Maybe food? Ensure it's safe, at least. What is the luckiest thing that has happened to you? Not flipping over in the wreck we got in when I was a kid, probably. All factors of it considered, we were told flipping would have been far more likely than my mom managing to keep us on four wheels. What are some small things that make your day better? Multiple things. Sara feeling positive, I'm fucking awful so having a yummy soda gives me a measly drop of Serotonin, I love seeing Venus come out of her rock to wander around, finding a new song to become utterly addicted to is great, cool weather outside... things like that. I'm sure there's more. What one thing do you really want but can’t afford? REALLY want? A trip to South Africa. What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of? Uhhh idk. Otep, I suppose. As a band, anyway. She's actually the QUEEN of bigoted bitches. Why did you decide to do the work you are doing now? N/A What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but just haven’t gotten around to? Oh, idk. If all jobs had the same pay and hours, what job would you like to have? Still a photographer. Have you ever saved someone’s life? No. What’s the hardest lesson you’ve learned? People can tell you they'll always be there and still leave in the blink of an eye. What’s something you are self-conscious about? Unconventional interests/hobbies and my body. Have you ever given to any charities? Yes. What was the best compliment you’ve received? Idk. What’s the most immature thing that you do? Not gonna lie, I can act bratty if I don't get something I SERIOUSLY want. Which of your scars has the best story behind it? None, really. What have you created that you are most proud of? A novel of very developed and deep RP characters over the years. What do you regret not doing or starting when you were younger? Learning German. As you get older, what are you becoming more and more afraid of? Mom dying. Being independent. In what situation or place would you feel the most out of place in? Most out of place? Would, like not one I've actually experienced? Uhhh idk. An orgy lmao.

Feb 11 Dancitron Movie Night - Venom

Due to the fact that rabb.it has fucked up its interface, it’s now impossible to copy/paste the chat more than a few lines at a time, AND it requires messing with the code to even copy/paste the names. Because I had to go the fuck to bed, @slenderwave compiled the log instead of me tonight. Thank u slendy.

Also we probably ain’t gonna have any more movie nights until we find a site without a fucked up interface.

Prowl liked the movie more than he indicated; while actually at the movie, though, he was mainly busy being shaken by the uncomfortable parallels between being Venomed and being Bombshelled/Devastatored. He probably said more to Soundwave tonight about what being under Bombshell was like than he has sum total to anyone else so far.

Specs– ((rabbit is such a shit)) Soundwave– *Soundwave–’s so on time this week it hurts. Everything’s set up, everything’s laid out, and he not only has himself parked at the edge of his couch seat, but he’s already nibbling a little silver ingot - one of several snacks on a small tray on his lap.* ((oh GOD the color)) Prowl– ((… fuck. FUCK.)) Specs– ((I had to manually type in the goddamn URL because trying to paste it in is apparently fucking illegal)) Prowl– ((you can’t copy/paste names anymore.)) SCProwl– ((ah fuck Soundwave– ((oh FUCK)) Prowl– ((it only copies the text, not the names. this is going to make logs impossible)) SCProwl– ((oh for fucks’ sake Specs– ((rabbit fucks up everything the movie)) Soundwave– ((i’ll take the logs tonight and look into how to make this work later in the week. don’t worry about it)) SCProwl– ((it looks like a text screen on a phone and i hate it Specs– ((I KNOW RIGHT)) ((oh and it doesn’t autoscroll at least for me so)) Soundwave– *Anyway, bad site design choices nobody asked for and possible future transfers to other sites if any of them are sufficient aside, here we are, and there he is, as ready as ready can be.* Swerve– //that was ridiculous and way more efort than needed rabbit Soundwave– ((deffo looking for another site before next monday. gotta see if anyone else got their shit together or if this is as good as it gets)) SCProwl– *i suppose that means she’s here as well despite rabb.it’s attempts to make that as annoying as possible* Swerve– //smokey mentioned cytube last week as an alternative? but i don’t know if they checked it out to see how it works yet Soundwave– ((noted)) *Soundwave– absently waves the little bar of silver in Prowl–’s direction as a greeting… then remembers WHICH Prowl– that is and pings her a proper Hello instead.* SCProwl– *nods and pings back before finding a place to sit* Twincast– ((*aggressively changes icon* Specs– *enter dragon! it is Palentine’s day, so she’s brought heart-shaped snacks with the Cybertronian word for “friend” carved, iced, and just generally placed on the centers. Other than the fun shape, it’s the same selection as usual. No magnets today.* Hello, Soundwave–! Windchill– (( Jesus H Crust you guys I leave for a few months and Rabbit goes to poop. More than usual. )) Twincast– ((ikr. I’m just glad the text wrap is apparently only broken on my desktop Swerve– //from what i’ve seen text wrap is more broken on firefox than chrome but seems to vary in general Soundwave– [[Greetings, dragon. Feeling filled with friendship today?]] Twincast– ((ah, yeah. I use FF exclusively, so : ’) RIP my soul *quietly enters room as if he doesn’t randomly disappear for months on end* Specs– Isn’t that human friendship holiday coming up? I don’t know if you theme for that one like you do for the human scaring holiday, but just in case, I thought I’d make them thematic. Soundwave– *Soundwave– glances at Twincast–, back to the screen, and then RIGHT back to Twincast–. Well that’s a sight for sore optics right there, isn’t it.* [[Greetings. Rumble is not in attendance tonight, if you have brought your… friends.]] Blaster– ((WHAT THE FRESH FUCK RABBIT!? Twincast– Nah, just me tonight. Though, I’m sure Rewind would be disappointed to hear that, if he was Soundwave– [[Frenzy requested he theme to this human holiday, yes. Said this one was perfect for it.]] ((rabbit is a pile of butts, i’ll be looking for alternatives as soon as i can after tonight)) Blaster– ((It went…badly, trying to get here Twincast– ((same. clicking the link kept redirecting me so I ??? had to pull some copy+paste black magic Windchill– (( It used to be a good livestream alternative, I don’t understand why they’d make it so hard to actually get into a room. ‘Cept it didn’t even ask for a name when I typed the url in, it just bypassed it so as best as I can tell the whole vetting process is entirely ineffective. )) Swerve– //same Blaster– ((ditto, kept redirecting me SCProwl– Which human holiday are we not observing this time? Specs– ((I had to type it in manually)) Windchill– (( Yup. )) Blaster– ((yeah Swerve– //i like how their 'this is the new rabbit’ window too was all like 'people asked for this!!’ no. no we didnt Specs– I’m glad I themed, then! I hope the snacks meet with Frenzy’s approval. Twincast– ((I think we’re perma invited to this group now, though? At least that’s how it worked for the subgroup I made the other day Blaster– ((literally did not ask for this, I liked the old one damnit Swerve– //seems so based on how i’m still in smokey’s from sat night Tarantulas (( is here ooc for the Good Goo Content and hopes rabbit doesn’t ruin the fun Soundwave– [[Valentines’ Day, as far as he knows. It is when humans consume large amounts of chocolate and appreciate their closest friends and companions. He is told the beings in this film adore chocolate as well and have very close relationships.]] Swoop– ((AHA!)) Twincast– ((WELCOME Windchill– (( YOU MADE IT )) Swoop– ((Dude. Fuck rabbit forever. I shouldn’t have to type the damn URL by hand.)) SCProwl– Chocolate is a type of food, right? Swoop– ((Thanks for coming to the rescue man 😮 )) Windchill– (( Ur welcome. )) Blaster– -don’t mind Blaster– making his way in, for once NOT looking half asleep/dead on his feet- Swoop– ((Wow. This update seriously sucks. It doesn’t scroll down when I send something to the chat. I’m manually scrolling. No way that’s going to get old. Bleh!)) Windchill– (( Gonna go grab a drink that fiasco has got me SWEATING brb. Or maybe it’s this houserobe but you know what. I’m gonna blame rabbit anyway. )) Soundwave– ((stop taking the remote, it may bug out and i can’t get it back)) ((not you, just a general thing)) Windchill– (( I was about to ask I didn’t even notice. )) Prowl– ((I fucked around with a rabbit style and got a way to copy/paste everything again)) SCProwl– ((it gave it to me automatically when i first jumped in, think it’s another issue with this new look Windchill– (( Could be, maybe they’ll get rid of the issue because I can’t imagine that it’s intentional. )) ((Or, don’t want to imagine. )) Specs– ((bots suck enough without having them able to control the remote)) Prowl– ((so we’re back in business, except now I’m fucking pissed off)) Soundwave– [[Yes, chocolate is a human fuel. It is easily melted and not of much value to their internal systems, but they seem to like it.]] Specs– It probably tastes good to them. SCProwl– Not unlike some of the things Cybertronians consume. Soundwave– ((i mistimed by two minutes but whatever - GRAB YOUR SNACKS AND USE YOUR BATHROOMS here are your warnings we start at 8)) ((VENOM // Violence, blood, and death, exposed broken bone, scientific/medical abuse, animal death, body horror, the general grossness of the unbonded symbiotes, seriously bad flashing lights (after eddie fucks with the keypad), moderately bad flashing lights (during a fight scene), I don’t know what you’d call eating out of the garbage but definitely that, vomit, misogynist language, people being in other people’s minds.)) Twincast– *finally slides into seated position–because guess who just realised they were still standing?–and waves at the other Blaster–!* Swoop– ((Dear god. Is everyone having to scroll to keep up with the chat or is it just me?)) Twincast– ((scroll is working… ok for me? my posts get slightly swallowed into the void tho Windchill– (( Mine is automatic, it seems to be affecting everyone differently. )) Swerve– //i’ve noticed that i only hae to anually scroll if i change tabs; as long as i stay in rabbit it auto scrolls Swoop– ((It doesn’t move at all when someone says something new. I’d refresh the page but I might never make it back here.)) Windchill– (( Sorry to hear it’s being an Extra Butt though. )) Blaster– -blinks at the other, waving slightly in confusion- Hi? Prowl– ((mine’s autoscrolling)) Windchill– *He’s here, uglier than ever and wearing one (1) more accessory than usual.*

Swerve– //are you using FF? from what i’ve seen people using firefox have more issues than people using chrome Soundwave– ((everyone. and because i really don’t want to spend all night on a good movie complaining about stuff none of us can change: - yes i will be looking for alternatives but i can’t promise they exist - yes the chat probably will not autoscroll for most of us - this update is a trashfire - i don’t know how to fix it and i’m sorry, i only found out about it an hour ago - let’s just do what we can with what there is tonight all right)) Swoop– ((chrome)) Specs– (mine isn’t autoscrolling even on the tab- and I’m using chrome)) Blaster– ((mine throws my replies into the void Specs– ((yessir slendymun)) Blaster– ((kaaay Swerve– //rip Twincast– @boom Sup? *he is reasonably sure you’re one of Nocturne’s… things. gotta say hi!* Windchill– (( Thank for subs. )) Swoop– *scampers in, oblivious to any theme or upcoming holiday* Windchill– *Ignorance is bliss.* Blaster– Um…. Swoop– HI : > Soundwave– ((no prob, i use them myself so i get it)) Windchill– *Will stop blocking the door with his butt maybe.* Blaster– Do….do I know you? Soundwave– *Soundwave– kicks back. It’s time. He’s been looking forward to this ever since it first appeared on his human datanet feed.* Swoop– *waves at said butt* Windchill– *His butt would reciprocate but that would be weird, so he waves with his hand instead.* Twincast– Maybe not, but–think you know'a friend of mine. Looks a lil bit like our host *kind of. Slendy is a unique beast* Windchill– Swoop–. Swoop– hi Blaster– …………….. Windchill– Hi, you Swoop–. Soundwave– *Glances to Twincast–. Now who’s he talking about over there?* Swoop– HI! Keheheh. You a bad door. No moving. Windchill– You know. I could make all sorts of inappropriate jokes about openings with that…but I won’t. Blaster– I’m…yeah, we met Swoop– Me Swoop– like jokes : > Windchill– *He’s gonna find a spot on the floor to sit instead.* Who knows, maybe you’ll hear some other jokes. Swoop– *scampers in and begins his Bird hunt* Blaster– …………….. Windchill– Ah, yes, the poison movie. Blaster– Hey, uh, Soundwave–? Twincast– Hope he didn’t traumatise you too much – Twincast–. Blaster– formerly Windchill– About poison. Soundwave– *There is no Bird tonight. There is enough trouble keeping up as is. Soundwave– wants to enjoy this his own lone self.* [[Yes, Blaster–?]] Windchill– Wait, no. *Has to cup his chin and recheck the definition of poison versus venom.* Eh. Swoop– *is CRUSHED by the lack of Bird and SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHHHS* Blaster– That…thing. Did it just posses the woman? Windchill– *Snickers.* Blaster– And no, he didn’t Soundwave– [[An investigative journalist breaking into scandals and coverups? He approves of such nosiness.]] Smokescreen– ((OH THERE WE GO Blaster– Just…um…wait Soundwave– [[And yes. It does seem it did.]] Blaster– You used to be named Blaster–? Smokescreen– /Smokescreen–’s running in and is hopping onto the couch./ Soundwave–! Soundwave–, how are you? Twincast– Yeah, changed it post-war 'n got this fancy, blue paint scheme to boot. Blaster– Ah. Thanks. Swoop– ((I was getting bacon what’d I miss)) Soundwave– *Soundwave– startles and automatically flips Smokescreen– overhead and down onto the floor. DON’T DO THAT TO HIM.* [[…He apologizes.]] Swoop– *climbs Windchill– to perch* This a GOOD movie? Smokescreen– /OW- Smokescreen–’s staying on the floor for a few minutes, but gives a thumbs up. That was pretty cool, actually!/ Soundwave– ((eddie brock is an investigative journalist, he’s picking up a big report with the guy at the head of the Life Foundation and doesn’t really want it cause fluff piece but has to do it)) Windchill– Dunno, Swoop–. We’re gonna find out. Swoop– ((thx)) Someone DIE? Soundwave– [[He is fine. A little surprised. Obviously.]] *Pause. Lean forward.* [[…Are you injured?]] Blaster– ….so, okay then… Windchill– I guess there was a rocket crash with dead people and a mention of some kind of murder, so yes. Someone died. Smokescreen– Haha, sorry, Soundwave–. Didn’t mean to surprise you! … I’m fine, probably. Just lemme lie down for a little more. Swoop– Crash and die means proooooobably good movie : > Smokescreen– … Can you show me how to do that, Soundwave–? Blaster– …. Windchill– It’s a great start. Prowl– ((as the child of a journalist I am personally offended by how shitty and immoral an investigative reporter he is)) Soundwave– [[All right.]] *He pauses again, then offers a small orange crystal.* [[…Snack? While you’re down there.]] Blaster– Okay, on the grounds that I used to be a reporter, don’t do that. Windchill– Earth is already in space. Everything is in space. Swoop– Them kissy facing. That gross. Windchill– You Swoop– gross. Soundwave– [[And he can show you how, yes. Not tonight.]] Prowl– ((to be fair: it is ENTIRELY valid for an Eddie Brock to be written as a shitty immoral investigative reporter.)) Swoop– Me Swoop– not in space. Me Swoop– on shoulder. YOU gross Windchill– I am gross, thank you for noticing. Soundwave– *Soundwave– would do that. … Not to Prowl–. He wouldn’t break Prowl–’s trust. But he’d totally do it to another bot.* Prowl– ((but the movie acts like we’re like… supposed to side with him for it.)) Blaster– ((Blaster– is just a lil offended. Not much, but just miffed at him Swoop– *points at Windchill–* Ew Windchill– *Sticks his gross glossa out at Swoop–. Likewise.* Smokescreen– Thanks, Soundwave–, that’d be a cool thing to know! And- and yeah. /Smokescreen–’s taking the crystal and is plopping it directly into his mouth./ Soundwave– ((i got the impression we weren’t supposed to like that he did it? everything points out he was a jackass)) Windchill– (( Yes, it bites him in the butt later. )) (( But I’ve seen this a few times so I’ll be quiet. )) Swoop– *blows raspberries* Soundwave– [[Hmph. No surprises regarding Drake’s reaction.]] Windchill– What a delightful sound. Right in my ear. I love it. Blaster– -sighs- Swoop– Kehehh! *points* No eaaar! Ear a human thing. ((eddie looks so shocked)) Prowl– ((so have i; i still feel like we’re supposed to feel bad for him. he doesn’t, like, change.)) Soundwave– *…Takes notes. DEFINITELY don’t do this to Prowl–.* Smokescreen– … Why is she giving him her ring? Windchill– I have audio receptors and they serve the same function as ears. Guess which one is easier to say? Blaster– ….. SCProwl– To end their courtship is my guess. Swoop– EeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeearrrrrUH Blaster– Oh. That really DID come back to bite him Prowl– ((see up here he’s getting consequences. that’s good, that’s valid. but it’s only at the start)) Twincast– Huh Smokescreen– Huh. So is that a ring he lent her or something? Windchill– Everything out of your mouth is an earful. You Swoop– noisy. Swoop– *licks Windchill–’s audio* *extra slobber just for you* Windchill– *SHUDDERS, complete with an ugly face.* Specs– She grabbed a… fish? With her bare hands? SCProwl– Courtship gifts are gifts. Meant to be kept by the receiver. Returning it is a clear gesture of rejection. Swoop– *chirps* Soundwave– [[The ooze creature is so…]] *Hand motion. What’s a word.* [[Oozy.]] Windchill– *Isn’t even going to try to wipe his ear off. Gross.* SCProwl– *not sure the ring was a courtship gift was but it seems like the most likely guess* Swoop– Booger Windchill– My thoughts exactly. A booger transplant. Swoop– Ewwwwwww *grins* Windchill– That’s quite an assumption but okay. Soundwave– [[…They have used precisely one animal. That is insufficient data.]] Smokescreen– He’s… Not a very good scientist, is he? Swoop– Me Swoop– an animal : > Blaster– -shudders- Soundwave– [[Not at all.]] Specs– Clearly not. How many people did he apparently kill? SCProwl– Impatient for the results he wants. Windchill– Are you Swoop– a wild animal? Blaster– That’s disturbing Soundwave– [[At least three.]] Swoop– *is so damn helpful tonight, it’s a shame Bird isn’t here to be helped* Me Swoop– VERY wild! Windchill– *Ear cleaning is so helpful.* I thought so. Swoop– *would lick Bird* Windchill– I’m empty, too. Swoop– Empty? Windchill– It’s a joke. I made it just for you. I thought you liked them. Swoop– ((Wow. He didn’t jump in and make it worse. I’m kind of surprised. I don’t know I’ve ever seen that in a movie before.)) Me do! :V Windchill– So, there’s a joke for you. First one. Swoop– Do it again Windchill– So soon? Swoop– Yah Windchill– These things take time… I’m not ready. Swoop– Slow keheh Windchill– Maybe so. Blaster– ….ow Windchill– Maybe…slow. Swoop– Slow *pokes* poke Twincast– *may be guilty of being that neighbor once or twice* Windchill– Excuse me sir that is my person that you are poking. Swoop– *bobbles his head in a nod* Soundwave– [[…Does he not know what he is there for?]] Smokescreen– Man, Eddie makes me look like I’m doing amazing in comparison Windchill– You making fun of me for being slow? Is that how it is? Blaster– He’s about to find out Swoop– *continued bobbling* Windchill– This man is very dramatic. Prowl– *arrives belatedly and reluctantly* Soundwave– [][][] I? [][][] Windchill– That’s the word I’m using because the others aren’t so polite. Soundwave– *Soundwave– glances at Prowl–’s late arrival. … Well, this isn’t the best scene to come in on, is it.* Prowl– *stops and stares at the screen* Windchill– Maybe you Swoop– slow. Swoop– No no no. Me Swoop– FAST!!! Blaster– -covers face- Windchill– Faster than I am? Prowl– *… tiredly closes optics. he chose a hell of a time to arrive.* Twincast– Mmm, no, that ain’t healthy Smokescreen– Is… Is that normal for humans Swoop– YAH! Me Swoop– waaaaaaaaaaaay faster. Fastest Best Windchill– Eh, you’re probably right. For now, anyway. Smokescreen– /Smokescreen–’s finally starting to get up from the floor to sit down on one of the arms of the couch away from Soundwave– Oh no Swoop– You Windchill– going to be faster later? Soundwave– *You know what, he’s just. He’s just going to make his greeting to Prowl– very subdued and start it with a mark of apology.* Windchill– When I can transform again? Yeah. Now I have to walk everywhere so I do it as slowly as possible out of spite. Swoop– Spite? Who you mad walking at? Windchill– Me probably. Swoop– *slow blinks his confusion out* Windchill– *Just smiles.* *Points* Cat. Blaster– ….huh Windchill– That’s not creepy at all! Blaster– That explains a few things Swoop– This movie so TALK. When Us do crash DEAD again? Blaster– -mostly about his own career, and the 'side-effects’ of it- Windchill– Uh, maybe later? Swoop– Fastforward Smokescreen– Hey! Cats have people they like Soundwave– [[That is a blatant lie. That cats do not like anyone.]] Smokescreen– Yeah! There’s a Ravage that adopted me! Soundwave– *…Cautiously invites Prowl– to come sit down? At least if he’s going to dislike the movie he can be seated comfortably while he’s uncomfortable with everything else.* Swoop– Sometime, uh, sometime Us watch COMP-i-lation videos. For fights and guts and stuff. That more fun than talk movie. Prowl– *starts. right, yeah, he hasn’t sat yet.* *sits stiffly.* Windchill– Then go watch one of those instead of complaining about what we’re watching now, Swoop–. Swoop– Nooo. *holds onto Windchill–’s helm* Us ALL do. Together. Fun. Soundwave– @P: [[If there is anything you need while you are here - /anything/ - …please, be certain to tell him.]] Smokescreen– … Eddie, Aliens are real Specs– Cats simply have standards about who they /do/ like. Blaster– …..wouldn’t this place have cameras? Windchill– Not when the plot demands it. Swoop– ((This seems like a talk y'all should have had in the car)) Smokescreen– Man, secret walls are always a bad sign, aren’t they? Swoop– Plot 😛 Smokescreen– Like, it was like that in Gotham too Soundwave– [[Always and ever, Smokescreen–.]] Windchill– Maybe we’ll see more goo. Prowl– ((they talked about the weather and how the LA angels were doing all the way here and then she was like “oh right shoulda mentioned the aliens”)) Smokescreen– … I guess no walls are secret for me, though, haha. Swoop– Goo is okay : > Windchill– Killer goo. Blaster– …….. Soundwave– [[…He assumes the goo motionless on the floor is de– oh, it’s the homeless human.]] Smokescreen– oh no Windchill– Why is she frozen? Blaster– ………. Swoop– ((omfg did he really just randomly mash buttons)) Prowl– *grimaces at the noise and lights* Blaster– -covers face again- Soundwave– *Of course they’re preying on those with no alternatives. Of course they are.* *Ugh, the lights.* Swoop– Her choke : V Prowl– *grimaces even harder at the living thing oozing over and under his skin* Smokescreen– Is… Is she gonna be okay Windchill– Dead people. Are you happy now? Swoop– *bounces a little at finally getting some fights* KEHEHH Yah! SCProwl– I sincerely doubt it, Smokescreen–. Smokescreen– He was like “I’ve never climbed a fence THAT high before” And then he woke up at home Windchill– What. Smokescreen– Oh… /Sad, Sad, doorwing droop/ Swoop– Kehaha! Him KILL tree. Soundwave– ((lmfao smokey)) Blaster– That’s…most humans should’t be able to do that Swoop– ((omfg)) SCProwl– ((lol smokey Prowl– ((lol)) Swoop– ((he is the most confused koala)) Soundwave– [[…He is going to go out on a limb and assume that none of this athletic ability is normal for Brock.]] Swoop– *immediately busts up* Out on limb Windchill– *Brows furrow.* Swoop–. Smokescreen– This is a mood Swoop– HI Windchill– *Shakes head.* Blaster– Um…. Smokescreen– … This is extremely relatable Windchill– Why are we being made to hear these gross eating sounds. Blaster– UM Swoop– Him Slag eat like that Smokescreen– oh … He’s kinda weak, huh? Blaster– Ah, there we go Soundwave– *Shudders. Disgustin– WELL THEN* Windchill– I mean, I eat off the floor and out of the trash sometimes. Blaster– !!! Prowl– *shudders at the voice* Swoop– *loses it again at the high pitched scream and KO* Smokescreen– Same! Sometimes, you just gotta have floor food SCProwl– Ugh. Windchill– Extra flavour. Floor flavour. Sometimes tastes oddly of feet. Smokescreen– I can’t say I know what feet taste like! Swoop– *holds his footsie up for Windchill–’s inspection* Windchill– They’re nothing spectacular. Swoop– *wiggles his borby toes* Soundwave– *Watching date Prowl– out of the corner of his optics. Part of him wishes Prowl– hadn’t put himself through this if it was going to be this tough. Another part of him appreciates the glimpse into what it must be like for Prowl– based on his reactions. Mostly, he just wishes it hadn’t ever needed to be a problem.* Windchil *Is immediately distracted by the foot in his face. You know he’s gotta do it.* Swoop– ((Lola, go fuck 'em up!)) Prowl– … That’s another one, isn’t it? Smokescreen– … /Watching Windchill–. Is he gonna do it??/ Windchill– *His glossa snakes out and strikes like a viper in case Swoop– tries to change his mind.* *Gotta lick fast.* Blaster– …… Soundwave– [[Yes. There is one that broke loose during the crash of the Life Foundation ship that brought them to Earth. It is that one.]] Swoop– *SQUEAKS but doesn’t pull away because he isn’t a putz* Blaster– I…what….what is going on here? Smokescreen– …… I’d do this Primus Windchill– *Is watching the debacle on screen with exactly one eye.* Swoop– ((omg I have never seen such a fantastic embodiment of the munchies)) Windchill– Your foot tastes exactly like a foot. Congratulations. Swoop– Good : > Windchill– What happens if you fart in a lobster tank? Smokescreen– /Oh dang he thought Windchill– was gonna bite Swoop–’s feet off or something./ Blaster– ….um… Windchill– Do they die? Well, that one’s dead. Blaster– Is……is he…. Swoop– Bubble Prowl– *it’s just a sustained grimace* Windchill– You can put your foot down, now. Unless you want me to lick it again. Which would be weird. Swoop– ((I’ve seen lots of characters called trash over the years but this man is the first one who is actual literal trash)) Windchill– *points* Dog. SCProwl– ((garbage man, dumpster fire trash loser Prowl– ((they do real good at making him look like absolute garbage)) Swoop– You Windchill– weird kehhehhh! *sets his foot on Windchill– for the grossest footprint* Windchill– You’re the one who wanted your foot licked. You think I lick things for fun? Swoop– Yes Windchill– You’d be right. Swoop– Kehehehheh Soundwave– [[…Is it the magnetic fields or sound?]] *Pity neither would work. He thinks. He hasn’t tried the sound, but Devastator’s a whole different thing.* [[Ah. Sound.]] Smokescreen– Liver failure? SCProwl– Fascinating. Prowl– *that was an amazing visual representation of what it feels like to have a monster in your head. and, of course, Prowl– hated it* Specs– I think human livers are also slightly mandatory, yes. Blaster– -he could do it- Smokescreen– What do they do? Swoop– ((this voice is a hair too close to Audrey II. It’s making me expect a song.)) Smokescreen– Do you have a liver, Specs–? Windchill– I leap up and act weird when I get hungry, too. SCProwl– ((feeeeeeed meeee, eddieeeeee Prowl– ((“does it have to be fresh? does it have to be mine?!” “actually lobster will do”)) Swoop– Weird how? Keheh Smokescreen– ((PFHPFHF Specs– I do! It processes methanol into formic acid, amongst other things. I don’t think human livers need to do that, though. SCProwl– ((bwahaha Windchill– Apparently eating garbage is weird. Blaster– ((HAH Smokescreen– Really? Why? Swoop– Me Swoop– BOMBER. Me do lots lots of flying and stuff. Soooo. *pats his belly* Weigh stuff for right amount things. : > Specs– Humans typically don’t have methanol in their bloodstream, right? Smokescreen– … Methanol? I have no idea, Specs–. Soundwave– *Slooooooowly tries to close his mouth as tight as possible.* Windchill– Because…nobody else wants to eat it? Are you implying that you poop on people, Swoop–? Windchill– It’s a biological antifreeze, for my species! But humans don’t live in the snow all the time. Swoop– *cackles* BOMB poops Soundwave– [[He is up to something. His voice suggests it.]] Smokescreen– Don’t trust him Prowl– His lab full of human experimentation suggests it. Smokescreen– oh no Windchill– Burnt. Swoop– Me : > Smokescreen– EDDIE Windchill– Some people never listen. Soundwave– [[The lab as well, yes. But he meant without seeing evidence of intention at the time.]] Swoop– *LOSES it* *this comedy is on his level* Windchill– Um excuse me that’s not a bug. Rude. Smokescreen– I wish I had goo Swoop– *stares, wide opticed and delighted* Prowl– *… Prowl– figures Soundwave– is probably dying of curiosity by this point, so…* @S «Devastator doesn’t talk to me.» Soundwave– *Lets go of the tray on his lap and pulls his feelers back in. Those will just be staying in his chest all night, yes.* Swoop– *in awe* Wicked! Windchill– I’m not even going to comment on goo right now. Smokescreen– Soundwave–, any idea where a bot can get some goo? Windchill– Just eat them. Swoop– *clacks his jaws together to let everyone know where he stands on the biting off heads discussion* Soundwave– *The tiniest blip of surprise. He wasn’t expecting that. He was wondering that, but he wasn’t expecting it.* @P: [[But you have reacted to architecturally destructive visuals before. Is it emotional instead of verbal, or…?]] Swoop– *is glued to the scrreen, loving this* Soundwave– [[He does not know where to find goo. He would not tell anyone here if he did.]] *That’s the last thing any of them need.* Swoop– *taps his heels against Windchill– as he chirps to himself* Smokescreen– Like- it doesn’t have to be that goo. Windchill– *Tolerates this.* Smokescreen– Just some goo to touch, 'cause it looks pretty cool. Prowl– @S «Emotional. Sometimes he makes… something like noises. But he doesn’t talk.» @S «… Bombshell talked.» Swoop– *claps* Windchill– *Could make jokes about lubricants…but is saving the dirty jokes for later.* Swoop– WHOOOOOO! Windchill– You like the explosions? Swoop– DUH! Windchill– I like the colour, it’s very fancy. Swoop– Me Swoop– could blue fire with some copper : > Windchill– Yeah, like how they make fireworks with different colours. Swoop– FACE fireworks! Soundwave– @P: [[Noises. Like screaming or growling, then?]] *That made sense. Maybe he needed everyone to have a coherent mind? No, Devastator had called him through Prowl– before. Someone not in control, then.* [[…Did he talk like this? Like the creature does to the Brock human.]] Windchill– Uh, yeah. Swoop– DEAD KAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA DEEEEEEEEEAD Soundwave– *…THAT is certainly one advantage of having one of these symbiotes.* Blaster– ….that oh wow Prowl– @S «LIKE that. It’s not actual audible sounds, but it /feels/ like roaring.» *he considers the question for a long moment.* «… No. It was a lot worse than this.» Windchill– That’s a lot of teeth. I approve. Swoop– KAH! BITE! Windchill– *Nods.* *He has a certain appreciation for biting the heads off of enemies.* Soundwave– *oh, it’s got Soundwave–’s teeth* Blaster– -actually squeaks this time- Windchill– I like this goo guy. Prowl– *shudders at venom’s little speech* Smokescreen– Rude! Swoop– ((Was that a NOSE BOOP?)) Smokescreen– ((YES Blaster– Yep, okay, no Soundwave– @P: [[He imagines there was never a 'we’.]] *Oh, did it HAVE to say it was in his head? Really?* Prowl– @S «… That was closer to what it was like.» Blaster– The CHILD SCProwl– That’s why this is called Venom? *Disappointed. There’s nothing venomous about the symbiote.* Smokescreen– Renal? Swoop– Gots Windchill– Hey no looking at your phone while driving, lady. Prowl– @P: [[That is - obviously you did not want a 'we’. He is trying to say, he doubts Bombshell spoke to you in any manner other than ordering.]] Windchill– I’m calling the police. Soundwave– *points to the police for Windchill–* Windchill– *He appreciates the assistance but refuses to look.* Prowl– @S «You’re correct. Nearly everything Venom said to him could have been something Bombshell said.» Swoop– ((WE <3 )) Smokescreen– ((WE SCProwl– Could they be poisoning their hosts? Would a compatible human even exist then? Blaster– -ohprimusheightsno- Windchill– Most things are less ugly from a distance. Blaster– Stop looking DOWN Windchill– Defeated by a plane. Smokescreen– Awww. Man, that is the nastiest sweatshirt ever Twincast– ((asfgh Prowl– ((i fucking love)) Swoop– ((are they fucking flirting)) Smokescreen– ((Yes Prowl– ((you know it)) Blaster– ((AWESOME Swoop– Whoaaaaaaa *starry optics* Swerve– //i know it’s canon in the comics that they;re like, married but sometimes i’m surprised that they allowed that much implied flirting in the movie Windchill– Oh, nice. Prowl– ((married with a BABY)) Swerve– //yea lmao Swoop– *in awe* Me Swoop– wanna do that….! : V Prowl– ((… multiple babies but like only the latest one counts)) Windchill– How did she get in? Soundwave– ((y'all ain’t wondered why i said venomtines day lmao)) Prowl– ((they weren’t ready to be parents before)) Windchill– You Swoop– do what? Smash people with other people? Swoop– *Snickers.* Yah! Soundwave– @P: [[He is sorry. That it was what it was. … And thankful that he can speak to you as he does. He often wondered, but - this is very - it is clarifying.]] *Oh, the scared and needing help bit tugs his spark. Damn it.* Swoop– ((And thus Eddie learns that it’s best to just listen to someone else because he has no goddamn sense)) Blaster– Oh, he’d /hate/ me Prowl– @S «This really doesn’t give a very good glimpse of it.» Soundwave– *Kind of glad she’s trying to help, at least.* @P: [[It was more than this?]] Swoop– ((Omg Venom and Annie fuckin got each other’s backs)) Swerve– //venom a+ wingman? Swoop– ((dealing with this terrible garbage man they love)) Prowl– @S «God, yes.» Windchill– Fantastic. Prowl– ((see that there is kind of the beginning and end of his entire self-reflection on the fact that he screwed things up royally)) ((and it came with prompting and didn’t really indicate that he has any understanding that everything ELSE he did was wrong)) Windchill– Gross. Swoop– Punch it Prowl– ((the rest of the movie is like “oh… yeah… this dude really IS a villain… eddie was good for standing up for him, probably, and isn’t it sad that he doesn’t have a job.”)) ((like he’s explicitly characterized as a “loser.” as a person who failed. not as, for instance, an “asshole.” losers are victims of circumstance, not the architects of their own failure.)) Blaster– ((DOGGO Windchill– Oh joy, this is gonna be an interrogation scene, isn’t it. Swerve– //i love the movie but yeah in this case he’s only seen as a loser because he was an asshole in the first place and didn’t really seem to grasp that entirely Swoop– Whoo! Swerve– //still love that doggo tho Prowl– ((that’s why I said i’m disappointed at how we’re expected to sympathize with him. they started off strong–making everything his fault, having him say everything is drake’s fault and annie calling him out on it–that was great stuff)) ((but by the end it’s Poor Eddie The Loser Was Right All Along)) Soundwave– @P: [[Is it permitted for him to ask for more explanation? He knows you do not like to discuss this business in detail, and would ask the alternates of his that were controlled, but he has not encountered any in person. He would like to understand more - understand you. If you are able at this point in time.]] Windchill– *Smacks lips at villainous monologue.* Swoop– *leans over to see what the smacking is about* Windchill– *Smacks more.* Prowl– ((and maybe symby sees him as a loser because he sees himself as a loser, rather than as an asshole–but the more the movie goes on, the more that “eddie is the jerk here” narrative fades away)) Swoop– *mimics the smacking* Soundwave– *Starts at Riot’s appearance* Blaster– …….. Swoop– ((gay)) Windchill– *It’s a chorus of smacking with no snacks to smack on. Tragedy.* Smokescreen– Is… Is that where they’re stored Swoop– *doesn’t know what we’re doing but it’s a team sport now* Windchill– *Smack smack smack.* Prowl– @S «… For starters, Bombshell didn’t let me copilot.» Windchill– *Stops smacking.* Blaster– HOLY-! Windchill– Wow, boobies. *Resumes smacking.* Twincast– ((weakass ladyvenom design Blaster– Um…. Swoop– ((does this count as a threesome)) Prowl– ((i choose to believe that kiss was entirely symby)) Windchill– WHAT. *Fluffs up.* Swoop– King Blaster– I’m… Okay… Windchill– *Grunts in displeasure.* Blaster– Not going to ask Swerve– //i think i like the comic version of klyntar’s more tho than the mcu version Windchill– Awkward, but I’m going to laugh at this. Yes. Smokescreen– ((awwww Prowl– ((i prefer comic venom entirely)) Swoop– Laugh at what? Windchill– My mate’s name is Riot. Prowl– ((the movie version is fun but it’s not my preference)) Swoop– Sweet : V Swerve– //i havent read enough of the venom comics to know him outside the mcu but i do at least know the klyntar in the comics enough to prefer them to mcu’s SCProwl– ((this isn’t mcu. it’s its own thing Prowl– ((~*venomverse*~)) Blaster– ….-muffled snicker- Swerve– //gfhbg yeah i just. refer to all of the live action superhero movies mcu at this point lmao Windchill– …My Riot isn’t that goopy, though. Swoop– You suuure? Windchill– Not usually. Maybe sometimes. Prowl– ((*sees a new batman movie* “grimdark mcu is at it again”)) Windchill– Can’t fight for shit either. Swoop– Whoa! Him get BUTT kicked! Blaster– ….. Swerve– //lmfao i mean Windchill– What a mess. Blaster– What the heck? Windchill– Well, that didn’t last long. Blaster– Annie! Swoop– You Soundwave– can beat up EVERYONE in this movie. Prowl– ((two nerds pathetically smacking each other is the best part of the fight)) Soundwave– @P: [[You have great willpower; the amount of control he would have to have taken - what he’d have to exert to keep you held in–]] *He’s thinking about how much it would take from himself.* [[…You saw Unicron’s control of Megatron. Could you speak to - or at - him as Megatron did? Or were you denied even that?]] Swoop– ((is it just me or is everyone else waiting for venom to get all hot and bothered by his host beating up someone elses’ host?)) Windchill– Dead. Soundwave– [[Perhaps. He’s never encountered a symbiote.]] *And he didn’t do so well against the Unicron up close.* Swoop– D E A D Windchill– Is… Is the sound of the rocket not enough? Prowl– @S «Willpower shmillpower. He didn’t have to exert anything. That’s not how the mechanics of it works.» Swoop– KA BOOM! Windchill– Double dead. Blaster– -covers face- Swoop– drown dead pretty boring dead Soundwave– @P: [[Hm. Closer to a virus?]] Windchill– If you say so. Swoop– Do Do say so Windchill– Not enough explosions? Swoop– Drowning boring. Blub blub fish nibbles. Windchill– Okay. Why are his lips so big Prowl– @S «He severed the connection between my brain and my body.» Soundwave– *Sits up straight.* Tarantulas (( OOPS SORRY (( didnt mean to take remote Smokescreen– ((theif,, Tarantulas (( stealin spide Swoop– ((venom omg buddy)) Smokescreen– ((sneaky spide Soundwave– @P: [[…That is more horrifying than anything he had imagined it was.]] Swoop– ((this is a real romcom good god)) Windchill– Dog. Blaster– ((STAN LEEEE Windchill– *Gasps.* Swoop– Nom nom bite Windchill– There are rules about eating people? That’s news to me. Swoop– Me Swoop– bite LOTS of people Not eat tho Windchill– Luckily, I don’t care much for rules so like, whatever. Just bite? Why? Are you mean? Swoop– ((I hope that writing job pays well because his food budget just went through the damn roof)) Yah, mean : > Windchill– Cool. All of my friends are mean. Smokescreen– “I have a parasite” Man, what an excuse Blaster– ((not hungry anymore Prowl– *mutters* I’m calling Devastator a parasite from now on. *it’s not a term of endearment.* Swoop– ((Wait wait… that was the line from the trailer that they made all ominous.)) Prowl– ((the trailer was so misleading)) Swoop– ((no kidding)) Windchill– (( Oh yeah I’ve had discussions about that one. Marketing at its finest, as usual.)) Blaster– ((it was Prowl– ((venom is menacing toward eddie for all of five minutes and then immediately starts falling in love with him)) Swerve– //yeah when i went to see it originally i expected that scene way way earlier Specs– ((that’s the power of tom hardy)) Soundwave– *Approval ping after the parasite Devastator comment.* Windchill– Edgy. Swerve– //this def sets up for a sequel tho so i’m curious if they’re gonna follow thru on it Swoop– Him not very red ((little on the nose but I’m okay with it)) Prowl– ((i’m disappointed that eddie wasn’t a beefy mulleted blond, but tom hardy is just SO GOOD at being gross in that hoodie, i’ll take him too)) Blaster– ((HAH Swerve– //lmao Windchill– *Stretches exactly one leg.* Smokescreen– ((im still so glad the lobster tank scene was unscripted and he just did that Windchill– That sure was gooey. Prowl– ((I KNOW it was brilliant)) Swoop– ((Tom Hardy did a good job for sure. Normally, when people say “you look terrible” to someone in a movie, it’s a cue on how we should be reading things. In this movie, he actually looked fucking awful.)) Prowl– ((he did. he looked nasty the whole movie)) Swoop– ((Was it really? That is beautiful)) Swerve– //im so glad it was god Specs– *the dragon stretches* Thank you for having me, Soundwave–! Swoop– It pretty good fights : > OH! Us do Mad Max now : V That good fight movie : > Windchill– Had some explosions. Soundwave– [[You are welcome, dragon.]] Swerve– //is this a deleted scene //also wow rabbit did u need to cut off the last post of the chat Soundwave– ((yes)) Prowl– ((this is a great scene and i’m so upset they took it out)) Blaster– ((pffff Swoop– ((So damn good)) SCProwl– ((Venom is gonna make Eddie a better person via cannibalism and tater tots Swoop– ((I saw pics of Eddie getting carried away fro mthe lobster tank too)) Soundwave– ((public stream end marker: 10:00)) Windchill– *Rolls his shoulders. Will this dislodge the dinobot?* Smokescreen– So, uh, Soundwave— you up to maybe dance again sometime? Swoop– *has stayed on a bucking T-rex trying to dislodge him, this is nothing* Windchill– *Sways from side to side.* Soundwave– [[Another time, Smokescreen–. Not tonight.]] *And not to this, for sure.* Swoop– What you dancing for? Windchill– Excuse me? Dance? How dare you suggest such a thing. I’m trying to get you off. Swoop– yuh HUH dance Windchill– Ineffectively. Swoop– Oh Then you suck at doing keheheh Smokescreen– Aww, okay. I’d be up to meet up with you to dance sometime, then! It’d be fun. Windchill– *Grunts his agreement.* Soundwave– [[Perhaps after a movie that is actually fun.]] Twincast– *staaaands. maybe he wasn’t so chatty tonight, but he’d be rude to not give their host a ping goodbye. Maybe next time~* Windchill– You’ll have to get off sometime. Soundwave– *Perhaps next time indeed. Farewell, Twincast–.* Twincast– ((I was so engrossed I forgot to RP. It was fun!! Thanks for streaming : D Swoop– ((I know the movie might have MEANT to imply that Annie was lying about the kiss being Venom’s idea but Venom literally never missed a chance to try to smash them together like Barbie dolls so I 10/10 believe her.)) Nuh uh Smokescreen– … I thought that was fun Windchill– Yuh-huh. Swoop– Not if us DIE here Soundwave– ((you’re welcome!)) Windchill– Oh. Well, sure, but why would we die here? Smokescreen– Oh! Oh, I know a good dance song for us, later. Have you ever heard of Cascada, Soundwave–? Swopp *is joking but he’s got a back full of missiles if we want to end it all* Blaster– ….-yawns and stretches- Swoop– so BORED from these songs us DIE Windchill– *Snorts.* I like them. Swoop– no Windchill– Yes. Blaster– Anyway, thanks for that, but I have to go now. Hopefully to sleep. Swoop– nO Windchill– I’m not having this argument with you. Blaster– Goodnight. Swoop– yes Soundwave– [[Goodnight, those leaving.]] Swerve– //nini friendos Windchill– No. Soundwave– [[And of course he has heard of that. Again, though: another night.]] Swoop– *squeaks* YES Smokescreen– Cool! I’m looking forward to it. Thanks for the crystal- and I still REALLY want you to show me how to knock bots down like you did earlier! Windchill– No, you can’t make me. *Squints at the squeaking next to his head.* Swoop– Can too Smokescreen– /Smokescreen–’s finally getting himself up, and is dropping by the bar to grab a drink before he finally goes home!/ Windchill– No. I have a date later and you, *he points over his shoulder at the Swoop– in question,* want no part of it, so you have to get off and like, not waste my time. *Stands up, Swoop– or no Swoop–.* Swoop– a DATE? :V Windchill– That’s what I said. Swoop– *PERKS UP* TOP GUN Soundwave–, us watch Top Gun? *bounces right off Windchill–* Windchill– *Oh, thank god.* Soundwave– [[No, not right now. Now it is time to leave.]] Swoop– : < But Top Gun good movie, Soundwave– Soundwave– [[Then go home and watch it with your brothers.]] Swoop– Them LAME No flying Windchill– Goodnight, thanks for goo movie, have fun telling Swoop– no for the next several minutes. Swoop– : > Soundwave– [[Goodnight, you are welcome, and he absolutely won’t.]] Swoop– Howwww about a LITTLE top gun : > Just flying parts! Windchill– I guess it’s not for everyone. Bye Swoop–, I’m leaving you here. Sucker. Swoop– *clearly has better taste than Windchill– since he is fighting for TOP GUN* Windchill– *Clearly.* *Waves, and backs for the exit.* Soundwave– [[On your way, now, Swoop–. There is no Top Gun here.]] Swoop– *gives the BIGGEST SIGH IN THE WORLD* fine Windchill– *Normally picks up straggler children to deposit home, but is apparently choosing to be irresponsible and leave it for Soundwave– to deal with.* Swoop– You Soundwave– boring boring Windchill– *And he’s gone before that can change.* Soundwave– [[Yes. What a terrible bot he is. Best you go and leave him to do dull paperwork and listen to people talking for hours without any fighting.]] Swoop– *knows he’s being teased but doesn’t NOT believe that’s what’s going to happen so he blows raspberries all the way out the door* Soundwave– *What do you know? That worked.* Prowl– *gives Soundwave– an expectant look* Soundwave– *Looks back and then around. He’s… he’s not actually sure what to do now. This was a Bad Night, movie-wise.* [[Do - would you like to clean, like the last time, or -]] *Twitchy fingers.* [[We could walk through the settlement nearby, or - anything else you would prefer to do. Actual paperwork, even. He does not know.]] Prowl– You mean doing paperwork and listening to people talking for hours WASN’T the explicit plan? Soundwave– [[Oh. He said that mostly to be rid of Swoop– in a timely fashion, but he has nothing against it if you would actually like that. He has plenty of the first, and the second could be either of us. Or someone else, if you had them in mind.]] Prowl– *… humor ping* Soundwave– *Oh, a joke. Okay, he’s got it now.* [[Ah. His apologies. That actually IS how he likes to spend his nights sometimes.]] *He forgets himself and smiles the teensiest bit.* Prowl– Me too. Sans talking, usually. Soundwave– [[He sees. … Do you have paperwork with you? We could work on that together. Sitting together, that is. Obviously, he is not entitled to type up your reports for you.]] *Pause.* [[Though he could do so with extreme speed.]] *Shakes his head.* [[A good and comfortable shared silence is never to be taken for granted.]] [[…Unless you meant you prefer someone else to do the talking, in which case he has plenty of tales he could tell you.]] Prowl– No, I don’t have paperwork with me. I—don’t know what I want to do. *it’s partially untrue. he does know what he wants to do—go home and be alone for a while—but he can’t have that. he’s never going to be alone again.* Soundwave– *Considers this.* [[You could do nothing, in a sense.]] *Small hand gesture.* [[Sitting and resting, sleeping, doing something unimportant for no reason other than it is fun. That sort of thing.]] Prowl– So, the usual movie night options. *beat.* … The usual besides interfacing. Soundwave– [[A fair point, if an important one. Such moments tend to be good for us both. Though he would like to clarify that he was not thinking of interfacing. He may not have the ability to sing, but he is not tone deaf.]] [[He will clean before it is much later. Experiment with what you care to do at the moment as you like; all he asks is that if you decide what you wish to do is something away from him, you interrupt to bid him goodnight first instead of simply popping away. An acceptable deal?]] Prowl– Mm. I’ll help clean. *that’s something productive he can latch onto. he doesn’t want to just sit and stare around* Soundwave– *Nods and motions toward the couches. Bridge away!* [[…He doesn’t suppose he could get you to help with the upstairs, the Kangaskhan, and the outer walls as well? Being away for a week tends to inspire his deployers to leave things undone.]] *Humor ping.* Prowl– Sure. Maybe not the—the Genghis Khan. I’d rather not have to worry about stepping on organics. Soundwave– [[Oh, they’re very sharp when it comes to not being stepped on - but better to err on the side of caution, yes. Still. He should introduce you to them some time, now that they have air masks.]] Prowl– Another time.]] Soundwave– ((aw man you can’t edit now? booooo)) [[Another time. Not now. Very well, here and the upper floors - and perhaps, if you still feel up to it and are not afraid of heights, he will show you how the deployers scrub the outer walls. And how he does. Both very entertaining.]] *Another small smile, because the first wasn’t as much of a problem as he’d expected. He’s trying to be a distraction. Primus only knows if it works.* [[Come, come. Everything to its place, now.]] *Affection, times three.* Prowl– I’d hardly call that “heights.” It’s only a few stories. *height’s relative and his universe’s Cybertronians are durable. he gets to work bridging the couches back where they belong; there’s a moment of hesitation before he remembers to return the three pings.* Soundwave– [[You’ve never met Blades, have you.]] *Soft huff.* Prowl– Sure. I’ve known him since before the war, we were in Security Services under Sentinel Prime. Starscream forced him into a combiner recently. Soundwave– *Puts the snacks he was crating back on the bar and turns to look at Prowl–, mouth in a small o and everything.* [[…Were it anyone else talking, he would suspect that of being a joke.]] *Shakes his head and goes back to packing.* [[Another reason to see Starscream deposed, he supposes. And he is sorry to hear of your - friend’s? - fate.]] [[He did mean his own, however. Grounder turned extremely unwilling helicopter turned grounder again. He would be surprised if Blades is even capable of jumping anymore. Poor mech.]] [[…Perhaps there’s a link somewhere in this misfortune of theirs. He’ll note it on the map.]] Prowl– I’ve never heard of mine ever being anything but a helicopter. And since I’ve known him since before extensive body mods were allowed, I suspect that’s his original shape. *all the couches are in place, he’s going to find something else to clean.* Not friend. Just longtime acquaintance. Soundwave– [[Longtime acquaintance, then. Still - he would not have wished that on him.]] *Mopping behind the bar while he’s there.* [[Do the two of you speak now?]] Prowl– He and his team have a standing invitation to contact me if they—need anything. They haven’t utilized it recently. Soundwave– [[Disappointing.]] *Maybe it would be good for Prowl– to have someone who Really, Really Gets It he could talk about it with, instead of Soundwave–’s fumbling attempts? Then again, that means someone else had to go through it. He doesn’t know. Unpleasant and sticky situations he never gave much thought to before the war ended.* [[But understandable, in a way. Some pains are too personal to share so easily.]] [[…Thank you for trying to explain it to him earlier, while he is thinking about it. He knows he does not fully grasp all of your situation, but he will continue to try. He would like to always be someone you can rely on to listen to and hear you when you speak about it. You deserve that.]] [[Enough of this room. Let us go clean upstairs. It needs it more anyway.]] Prowl– *a jerky nod* Thanks. For listening. *it sounds hollow right now, when he’s tired of thinking about it; but he knows that later on when he’s less exhausted he’ll be grateful for it.* Lead the way. *and up they shall go.*

Multiverse Sans [v1.4.2] (Updated 5/17/2019)

Hello! Welcome to ukagaka ghost Multiverse Sans v1.4.2! *Earlier versions can still Network Update for the latest patch.

(download latest ghost .nar) (download balloon .nar)

Install the custom Sans & Papyrus Font balloon before booting up MVSans and he’ll automatically use the correct one!

Ghost Installation Instructions

What is an ukagaka ghost? A ghost is a character who lives on your desktop and talks to you, and has various levels of interactivity. MVSans is effectively an AI, with visual novel aspects involving Papyrus phone calls. He recognizes other ghosts (mostly Undertale ukagaka) and will occasionally comment on them or have a special event. 

Check the Dev Plan for future updates. Make sure to run Network Updates regularly for smaller frequent patches! Dev builds might be a little wonky but you'll be notified upon download what to look out for.

Features:

Many ghost developers are satisfied to give their ghost a shell and some random dialogue and call it a day. That’s not me. MVSans is not designed as a passive ghost, though he has enough dialogue to fill that role if it’s all you want. He’s programmed to learn and have feelings and opinions about you, depending on how you treat him. Once he gets to know you, his demeanor and conversations will change accordingly. He gets very salty when you ruin his knock-knock jokes and will even counter-troll YOU if ya keep it up. In the future he may notice and comment on sudden changes in your behavior. See Player Traits section for details.

MVSans’ dialogue has a robust architecture that modifies even the most common phrases into a slightly different message every time, just like a real person’s conversation. Since multiple AUs are supported, care has been taken to acknowledge the dialect and lexicon differences of each universe. Unlike classic and geno Sans, UF!Sans likes mustard, swearing, and refers to Paps as Boss. The differences run much deeper than these examples, check this dialect comparison:

↑ That’s the same line of dialogue, different dialect.

Clothing:

MVSans currently has three “Clothing” items. A Sansta hat, the Dapperblook hat, and an unlockable tongue. The tongue's an optional piece because not everyone wants their skele to have a tongue. The Dapperblook hat was an April Fools Day exclusive event reward. 

Shells:

Multiverse Sans has 5 AUs and 6 shells supported. You can change shells via his Options Menu or the right-click menu. Multiverse Sans aims to support as many AUs as possibly. View this post for information on shell submission guidelines, and a poll to vote on the next shell's AU.

Hitboxes:

MVSans has 4 hitboxes with 3 types of interactions; Double-clicks, rubbing the pointer, and mousewheel. Double-clicking on a non-hitbox will pull up his Main Menu. 

Head - Stroke his head repeatedly to pet him. * skeles love pets! 

Face - It’s rude to put your fingers in someone’s face holes.  * no booping either, bucko.

Ribs - Tickling is good silly fun, but not too much!  * i need to breathe too, kid.

Bonezone - That’s a private place, ya pervs.  * sorry pal, bonezone’s closed. 

↓Tickling messages escalate as he approaches his limit! 

↑ Give him a sec to breathe!

Main Menu: 

Open the main menu by double-clicking a non-hitbox zone. The first 1-2 options prompt his standard random dialogue. You can ask for a knock-knock joke, or a thinly veiled threat from the BudTime Generator. Ruining his knock-knock jokes makes him salty!

BudTime Generator  Based on the hilarious “hey there buddy chum pal” meme, Sans will generate a whole randomized paragraph of glorious passive-aggressive threat dialogue for you. There are over 200 variants on “crummy juncture”/”bad time” alone!

Self-Care Advice Having a bad day? Tell Sans what’s on your mind and he’ll try to cheer you up. This feature is courtesy of @huskalis and their Geno Sans ukagaka that I used as the base for MVSans. 

Compliment and Thank Sans  Tell Sans he’s cute, and thank him for all his hard work sitting on your desktop. These functions are courtesy of @characteroulette via their Sans & Papyrus duo ghost, one of my favorite ghosts to this day.

User Config, Sans Options, System Functions  Check status and adjust settings for yourself and Sans. Check email, run updates, and User Reports from Functions. 

User Reports: 

 Once they’re unlocked, you’ll be able to screenshot a set of menus and send them to me to give me information on how people play with MVSans, since I have no idea how most people use him. Getting this information is important for balancing the weight of actions for determining Player Traits!

Player Traits & Sans Mood/Relationship: 

The way you interact with Sans affects your Player Traits, which are stats that describe what Sans thinks of you as a person. You can check your dominant and secondary traits under the User Config menu. Player Traits include: Sweet, Rude, Silly, Naughty. This post has more detailed information on these stats. 

Player Traits:

Sweet - If you treat him nicely (mainly through pets, and confiding your worries in him), he’ll comment about how sweet you are and that you deserve hugs and other kind things. Rude - If you poke him in the eyes, tickle him beyond what he’s comfortable, repeatedly ruin his jokes, and other impolite things, he’ll consider you pretty rude and be equally irritable with you. He’s likely to drop lowkey death threats and other dark humor. Silly - Tickling him and asking for jokes a lot tells him you’re very silly, and since you’re so goofy he’ll share some jokes he saves only for his best audiences. Naughty - If you keep going after the bonezone, or barrage him with pickup lines, he’ll consider you pretty naughty and tell you as such. He’ll tell you dirty jokes you wouldn’t otherwise hear, since your mind is apparently in the gutter already.

Sans’ Feelings Stats

Affection (Sweet) – How much Sans cares for you, on a platonic level. —Against his better judgement, he’s started to care about you.

Enmity (Rude) – How upset Sans is with you, or how much of your shit he’s willing to put up with. Contributes to “Bad Mood.”  —Under other circumstances, this human would be having a Very Bad Time.

Humor (Silly) – How entertained Sans is, affects likelihood of pranks and jokes. Contributes to “Good Mood.” —Is he actually having fun, or is he just humoring you?

Amour (Naughty) – How boldly romantic or lewd Sans may feel toward you. (The nature of his attraction varies by traits and Affection stat)  —Papyrus may be onto something with that “secret datemate” idea. 

Your relationship with Sans determines your progression in unlocking content not specific to Traits such as the Papyrus phone calls. Sans’ mood depends on a number of variables, particularly recent interactions. You can check how he’s feeling under the Sans Options menu. 

Installation: 

If you’ve never used a ghost before, you’ll need software first. I recommend using SSP. Ghost guru @zarla-s​ has a great guide written on installing ghosts, and their Gaster ghost is awesome. I highly recommend downloading it.

(download latest ghost .nar) 

(download latest ghost .zip)

Install the custom Sans & Papyrus Font balloon before booting up MVSans and he’ll automatically use the correct one!

(download balloon .nar)

(download balloon .zip)

To install, just drag the .nar or .zip files onto an existing ghost’s face. Right-click to Call Ghost and select him. 

Join the Ukagaka Dream Team Discord if you wanna talk about ukagaka and Undertale!

Credits 

(aka dear god Ukagaka credits are a friggin spiderweb of sources)

Sans himself belongs to Toby Fox’s @undertale obviously. Additionally, all audio assets are pulled straight from the game. 

@zarla-s is behind PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING UKAGAKA. The core templates, tutorials, and much inspiration is from this talented individual. She created the black Undertale themed balloons that I modified to be proper fonts for Sans & Paps that MVSans uses.  

@gr33nbeen made the original sans ghost, which was based on @zarla-s ghost template. I edited him to have pink slippers and be shirtless. 

My coding started from the Geno Sans ghost by @huskalis which was in turn based on @gr33nbeen Sans ghost. Geno Sans is from @loverofpiggies‘s AfterTale comics. 

I swiped some dialogue (with permission) from @characteroulette‘s Sans & Papyrus duo, which is the Sans of @gr33nbeen and the Papyrus of @cuddlyhawk. It’s @characteroulette‘s fault that MVSans exists because I loved these guys so much I had to make a balloon to give both of them their appropriate font, and then I decided to make my own lil ghostie after having so much fun digging in the code. 

***Up-To-Date Shell Credits maintained at the bottom of this post.*** 

commenting is hard and scary: general trends in the reasoning of fic readers

an incredibly academic review of answers, asks, and replies by me, 2017, tumblrdotcom

Introduction

This post concerns the super scientific survey from yesterday.  A couple of you asked, so: the reason I wanted to know why folks don’t regularly comment is a combination of things.  The first is writing for spones, which is a rather new experience, and the comparatively tiny number of comments on what I think is a pretty darn good story, compared with the overwhelming enthusiasm for the s/u piece I posted the other week- it got me thinking, needless to say.  Second is the ever present discrepancy between number of comments and read-counts on new chapters when I post them.  Third is receiving comments that start ‘I never comment, but’ and finally giving into the curiosity of what that’s like, to read all this fic and not comment on it.  Fourth is the always circling posts of ‘comment on the fics you read!’ with explanations of why and how - it seems like those don’t totally get through to people?  I don’t know, maybe they do, but it’s not like I reblog one and wake up the next morning to a bevy of comments.

Methods

Participants included the metric butt-ton of anon commenters, plus those who replied to the original post which you can read here.  Too many to respond to without clogging everyone’s dashes, so we’re doing this instead.  

Results

There were five main categories that responses fell into: not having much to say (and the temptation of the kudos button), RL issues, finding commenting stressful, perceptions of the author, and other.

The Profundity of Comments

The most reoccurring reason for not commenting (or not commenting regularly) was a feeling of not having much to say other than ‘I liked it.  As one anon wrote, “i just honestly never know what to say and other comments are so well-constructed that i feel like my random "aww theyre so cute" would be inadequate.”  This pressure to feel profound was reiterated by others, such as another anon who suggested “I think not all readers are former lit majors who may get intimidated to leave a "thoughtful" comment and are reading to de-stress or something.”

Beyond this lack of profound and interesting statements on fics, there was a general feeling that leaving a kudos, favoriting a fic, or creating a bookmark was akin to leaving a short comment saying ‘that was great’.  One anon put it this way: “if I'm just saying 'great fic', it feels interchangeable with giving them a kudos”.

RL Issues

There was a reoccurring sentiment related to feeling like one has to be profound: not having enough time to sit down and leave the type of comment the reader wanted to.  Also included in this was not having the energy to do so, either because readers were enjoying fic as a way to relax and de-stress, or because they were reading in bed and were tired.  Another issue raised was the fact that mobile reading doesn’t lend itself to commenting, and it’s awkward to have to switch to a desktop to comment.  Finally, there was the simple problem of forgetting, despite all best intentions.  Life, as we all know, gets entirely too busy sometimes.  @samttuummaa ties this all together nicely and puts words to what a number of other folks said in their own replies: “Here's the recipe: start with I read on my cell, where typing is a moth#£$&#@! of an experience. Combine that with the fact that I always had a million things to say so the reviews were rarely short. Toss that with a toddler wanting my attention. Let it all simmer in the fact that I only got to read in spurts of just a few minutes at a time… modify this recipe by adding a 2nd baby”.

Commenting as a stressful activity

This section of results fell into two main categories.  First was readers who struggle with social anxiety.  Second was readers for whom English is a non-native language, and either the difficulty of writing in english was prohibitive, or they were too self-conscious of their writing to enjoy the process of leaving a comment.

Author as a roadblock

Interestingly, many folks wrote about ways in which authors themselves were an impediment.  There was a general sense among respondents that if authors don’t respond to comments, it’s not worth leaving them a comment on their story.  One anon raises an interesting question, writing: “if the author then doesn't engage with the comments… why is a comment better than a kudos?” Additionally, readers felt that writers who don’t respond to comments might ignore the comments they leave, or commenting might be bothersome or irritating to these authors.

Some readers had negative interactions with authors which turned them off from commenting.  One anon wrote: “Actually I left a good comment to a fic arthor and she didn't reply back to my comment but replied back to everyone's else and felt so horrible.”  Another recounted a story of an ongoing correspondence with an author that went south for no discernible reason, which made them wary of engaging with writers in the future.

Another aspect of the way in which readers’ perspective of the author interfered with commenting was a perception that fic authors don’t like short comments.  A second was that authors - myself included - are annoyed by pleas for updates, but that is what the reader really wants to write. (footnote 1: there is a difference between ‘update please!’ and ‘can’t wait to find out what happens next!!’  For me at least, the latter is more than welcome, while the former does tend to feel quite rude)

Finally, @what-if-im-a-mermaid and @mizjesbelle offered insight into the feeling that authors have their friends in fandom and that fics have an ‘insider/outsider’ culture, which the reader can be very much on the outside of, or that as an unknown reader, that feedback wasn’t pertinent compared to the author’s friends comments.  As @what-if-im-a-mermaid wrote “I also remember having this vague impression of fandoms as these groups of people who all know each other and comment on each other’s work and are friends and feeling, idk, ‘excluded’ is not the right term because i wasn't sad about it, but like it was something I wasn’t part of? Like it didn’t concern me?”  @mizjesbelle follows up this comment by writing, “@what-if-im-a-mermaid I know what you mean about a comment section sometimes feeling like a club you're not part of. I follow a lot of webcomics, and there are some I don't comment on because everyone clearly knows each other. I know they don't mean to be unwelcoming, but it can feel awkward.”  (footnote 2: I have made all of my fandom friends through discussions started in comments on stories and trust me, if you comment on a story of mine, I remember you and I love you)

Other

There were a number of reasons that fell outside the above mentioned themes.  These are that a fic is bad and the reader doesn’t want to leave criticism, being overwhelmed with feels after finishing reading a fic, the story is old, as a writer themselves they don’t care to receive comments and therefore don’t leave them as readers, and not realizing how it feels to put yourself out there and publish creative work.  @what-if-im-a-mermaid writes, “I think part of it is that if you’re a casual fic reader and you’ve never put yourself out there by posting stuff you created to The Interweb it can be hard understand how incredibly rewarding receiving any feedback at all is. For the longest time I thought of fic writers as a bunch of people who find writing so easy and intrinsically rewarding that they post billions of words on line for free, because it makes them happy.  They’re obviously Real Writers, very good at what they do, so why should feedback from a random girl who knows nothing about lit and writing affect them in any way? ‘ (footnote 3: it does make me happy, it’s so asldkfjasldkjf not easy, and if you enjoyed my story, you’re not random, see footnote 2 about how much I love you)

Discussion

Overall, a number of reasons stated here have made the rounds in fandom before: old stories tend to get few comments, folks don’t want to be rude and leave criticism, English is a ridiculous language, talking to authors can be scary, commenting is just plain hard when we all have work/school/kids/whatever, and the kudos button is right there for the clicking.

One aspect of these responses that surprised me was the variability.  A lot of people have very different reasons for not commenting, which I hadn’t ever really considered before.  As a writer, I interpret a lack of comments to mean that my writing is bad or boring, and even if folks are reading it, it’s more so out of not being able to find better fic than any true enjoyment.

Another thing I hadn’t thought about was the fact that for readers, the kudos button can feel the same as leaving a short comment - I don’t know about other writers, but those two feel entirely and hugely different to me.  However, having read through all your responses I think I can change a bit and take kudos more to heart and hear what you’re all saying: you enjoyed the story and had you commented, that’s likely exactly what the comment would read.  At the same time, I’d encourage all of you to consider how it feels to see a list of names of folks who have left kudos and know full well that only a handful of them stopped to tell you that they liked your story.

I was also surprised by the way in which a writer responding to comments made such an impact.  I had no idea anyone responded until one day I left a comment and got a response back and then I started doing it myself.  I mcfreaking love talking to readers through comments, especially on chaptered fic as I get to see their reactions as the story develops.  It’s like getting to read my own story through someone else’s eyes and experience it as if I’m the reader who doesn’t know what’s coming up in the next chapter, with all of that thrill and fun.  The same goes for one shots, though I don’t get to build that rapport over the course of the story.

Further Research

One question I’m left with is: for those of you who do comment, what is the draw for you?  And for those of you who don’t, is there a way for authors to engage you so that you would comment?  An anon wrote, ““FFN has this culture of the idea of asking for reviews being tacky, probably from the occasional 'I'll post the next chapter after 100 reviews' fics” which I’m not suggesting or anything of the sort.  I don’t think that begging for comments is exactly the way through this.  I’m more curious as to whether there is anything that might change your commenting behavior - because trust me, I’ll do it.

Conclusion

Fandom is the best and continues to be one of the great joys of my life, and I imagine many of yours.  I wish I could convince everyone to comment, but I also respect all the reasons all y’all have furnished as to why that’s not realistic to ask.

Welcome to this half-assed guide on how to start up a writing blog! Hopefully, it will manage to provide some important and/or useful information for all of you aspiring fic writing bloggers out there. 

Please note that many visual examples have been linked to certain steps. If my explanation is not clear, click on the link provided for a visual example of what I am saying. The whole album of examples is right here.

Without further ado, let’s get to it!

1. THE BLOG

The very first step of our journey, and perhaps, the most important. Your blog is the face of your writing, and the face of you, the writer. And by blog, I mean your desktop theme, your mobile theme, and your master list. This section here will be dedicated to formatting all of those things.

The desktop theme.

Your desktop theme is the layout of your blog as displayed on a computer screen. As a generality, you want your blog to be as readable as possible because that is the main thing people will be doing on your blog. Reading your stories. My main tips for your desktop theme are:

The bigger the font size, the better! Try to avoid anything under 10px, and attempt to go for any theme that has a font customisation of 11-12px. Despite that you can zoom on a desktop page when reading a fic to make the text bigger (ctrl and + on PC, ⌘ and + on Mac), not everyone knows this. The bigger the font size, the more readable your blog is.

Minimalist, single column themes are ideal! Readers can be deterred by cluttered themes, where they go onto your blog to find that it has three columns, the sidebar is so long that half of your links are cut off, etc. You want to keep it simple and easy. Having a sidebar and header is completely fine because it can add some flare to your theme, but a single column is something I stress. It allows the reader to take in one post at a time, and it generally allows for a larger font size, too. Multiple columns can make your blog seem cluttered, especially if your more recent posts are all text-based, which can literally appear like a massive, confronting wall of words. Keep it simple, keep it single.

Visible, easy to access links! Links are super important, as the first thing your reader is likely to do on your blog is search for your master list link. Most themes will have some kind of coding for links, so they are very simple for you to set up. But the more visible your main links (master list, faq, messages) are on your desktop blog, the better. As you can see in this image, my links are one of the first things you see on my blog.

That is pretty much the basics of your desktop theme. Now, for some quality theme makers that I recommend sourcing your themes from: @shythemes / @sorrism / @odeysseus / @acuite / @pohroro / @neonbikethemes / @felinum / @neothm / @theme-hunter (which is a blog that sources loads of themes!)

The mobile theme.

Your mobile theme is the layout of your blog as displayed on the mobile app. The main elements that you can customise here are your header and description. The most important aspect of the mobile theme is your links, so I am going to show you how to make a link for your master list. Please note that you cannot make links on the mobile app, it must all be done in the Edit Appearance section of your desktop blog.

Go onto your blog and click on Edit Appearance.

Under Appearance Options, go to the Description. This is where we will be entering the code for your link.

Copy and paste this code: <a href=“Insert Link Here”>Link Name</a> and alter the bolded sections to be the link to your master list, and whatever you wish for the link name to appear as. ‘Master List’ and ‘m. list’ are the most common, but feel completely free to think out the box! This is what it should look like.

Save the theme. When you go onto your mobile theme, the link should be activated and looking something like this. Test it out by clicking on it, and if it redirects you to your master list, then you have successfully created a link!

This process can be done for all of your links on your mobile theme, such as your FAQ and fic recs. All you have to do is copy and paste that code into the description and alter it as desired. If you wish for the links or any other text in your description to be on a new line, just add <br> to the start of each line of text that you want on a separate line, as seen here.

Important note: If you are wanting to change the header of your mobile theme, make sure you are doing it on desktop, with your desktop theme customisation page open in a different tab. This is because whenever you alter your mobile theme header and save it, all of your link coding will be erased (this is what it will look like on your desktop theme customisation after you save the new header – see how all of your coding is gone?) and your mobile description layout screws up, like this. Having your theme customisation page open in a different tab before you edit your mobile theme allows you to highlight and copy your description code. So, after you save the new mobile theme adjustments, you can refresh (remember to do this, but only after you have saved the mobile theme) your desktop theme customisation page and re-paste that code into the description section and save it so it all looks normal again without having to rewrite it all.

The master list.

The final part of the blog section is setting up your master list. There are many, fancier ways to create a master list, such as a coded page that arranges your stories by filter, etc. But this is going to be the simple, mobile-friendly master list that I use.

Create a new post. If you want to have a header for your master list, make it a photo post. If you do not want to have a header for your master list, make it a text post. For example, mine is a photo post, as I wanted to have a header for my master list.

The layout of your master list depends upon you. Some writers like to section their master list by series, oneshots, and drabbles (like me). Other writers like to section their master list by the members. Some writers like to add a small description of the fic in the master list (like me). Other writers only add the genre of the fic, eg. fluff, angst, a specific AU. Decide how you would like to present yours, but for the sake of this mini tutorial, I am going to section it by member, and only add the genre of the fic.

On your new post, title your master list however you please. Then, begin setting up your preferred layout.

Now, to add the links to your stories. What you will want to do is highlight the title of your story (or whatever text you are wanting to be the link to your story, eg. on my blog, it is the chapter number, or ‘read here’ for my oneshots). When you do that, a row of eight circular icons will appear above the highlighted text. Click the infinity symbol.

The infinity symbol will open up into a bar where you can enter a link. Copy and paste the link to your story here, and then click done.

Now, your story will be hyperlinked to that text! Rinse and repeat this process for all of your stories in your master list. Save and post, and your master list is complete! The end result will look like this in the post, and will look something like this on your blog. 

With every new story that you post, all you have to do is go back and edit your master list post to add in the new story. You can do this by opening up your master list post and then clicking the edit symbol in the top right corner, which will take you to the post editing screen.

Note: The link that is created when you post your master list is the one that you will copy and paste into the coding for the master list link we created back in the mobile theme section!

2. THE POSTS

Our second step gets down to the marrow of all this. Posting your stories. The layout/format of your story post depends upon you, though there are a few general guidelines that I recommend following, as all of us fic writers do it too.

The story post.

Make sure your layout is readable! A good, clear format is what draws a reader in; it encourages them to give your story a chance. One that is vague, or extremely cluttered and nonsensical will deter a reader. You know those general guidelines I just mentioned? They are including the pairing involved, the genre of the story, the word count, and a brief, yet intriguing description the details what the story is about (like a blurb). Warnings are also important to list, if there are any that you think may heavily affect certain readers (eg. character death, or dealing with tough topics like suicide). If it is a series, it is recommended to link your already posted chapters to every chapter post, too. It saves the reader from having to constantly go back to your master list to find the next chapter.

Create a header (optional)! It has become common over the past year to add a header/banner to your story. Doing so adds a bit of colour to your story post, and somewhat acts in the same way a book cover does. Here is a tutorial on how to make a header with Photoshop. If you decide to do headers, then I suggest making it unique to you! Creative, original headers are what catch the eye of the reader.

Tag your story appropriately! The process of tagging your story is what makes your story appear in the search results whenever someone looks up that particular tag. It is really important to tag your story appropriately, as in, do not tag your story with ‘bts smut’ if there is literally no smut at all in the story. Here is where you tag your stories and what the tags look like after you have entered them (separate each tag by using the comma button).

Use ‘keep reading’ links! This is mainly for stories that are over 450 words. The ‘keep reading’ or ‘read more’ separator makes it so that the reader has to click on the link to open up the rest of your story post in order to read it. The purpose of this is so that your entire story does not clutter up the dashboard, and make your followers have to scroll past thousands of words just to get to the next post. They keep everything tidy! Place this separator anywhere after your genre/pairing/word count/warnings format, as those details will still need to be visible for your reader on the dashboard.

Licensing your stories.

After many incidents of plagiarism, it has become common to clearly copyright your stories. Since everything you post online is technically copyrighted to you (as long as what you are posting is your own original content), all you need to do is state: All Rights Reserved © [Your Blog Name]. For example, mine is: All Rights Reserved © Vankoya. I copy and paste this license after the author’s note at the bottom of all my story posts.

3. EXTRA NOTES

Now that all of the technical stuff is out of the way, I am going to mention a few things here that all new fic bloggers should keep in mind when starting out.

Be patient when it comes to receiving feedback, followers, and notes! It is very rare for a new writer to receive plentiful of the above straight off the bat. Yes, there are certainly a few who manage to dive into the fic writing community and have their stories receive loads of notes and messages within their first month of blogging, but as I said, that is a very rare case. To put it in perspective, on my first fic writing blog, I had nearly twenty oneshots posted by the time I breached my first thousand followers, and started getting more than 50-100 notes on my stories. It can take time. Just remember that everyone started with nothing. Even those that receive daily messages, who have 500+ notes on their stories, and thousands of followers. Besides, how popular your stories are within the community does not define whether your writing is good or not. Trust me!

On that note, try not to channel all of your focus on popularity! Do not let the reason why you started writing and posting your stories in the first place get away from you. This has been a pretty big thing within the fic writing community lately, where an unnecessary divide has been created between writers who receive more recognition, and those who receive less. Please, do not let popularity define the reason why you write, because it will only eat at you until your passion/hobby becomes something that you resent. Please, do not play in this current game of blaming more recognised writers for ‘stealing’ the spotlight from everyone else, because that is not true. As a reader myself, it takes a lot for me to stray from a writer that I am familiar with (especially when I barely have enough time to read their writing as it is), so I recommend keeping that in mind if you are ever wondering why you may not have tons of readers. It just takes the right reader to stray out of their limits one day and discover you! 

Taking requests for your first month or two can help a lot! Readers love requesting ideas, and that is something that I did a lot in my first two or three months of writing on my first blog. It draws in an audience who can take part in what you are creating, and you will be able to get an idea for what it is that the readers are desiring to read. My main points with requesting are you do not have to write every single request you receive, and you do not have to write a request that does not inspire you, or involves a topic that makes you uncomfortable. These requests do not have to be full-blown oneshots (unless you wish for them to be), they can be simple drabble requests for some fun, and can act as a break in-between you writing your own original stories. From my own experience, most of my audience was gained this way on my first blog. Though it is not necessary for you to do, especially if you are mainly writing for your own enjoyment, and not for consistent feedback.

Well, that’s about it! I hope this guide can help you out in some way. If there is anything further you feel like I can add to this, please send me a message and I will look into it.

Good luck with your new endeavour. Enjoy writing!

1-120, dare you

3 Fears- That my computer will crash at question 119, spiders, and planes

3 things I love- Wynonna Earp, writing, and video games

2 turns on- Hmm when someone runs their hands through my hair or shows me any kind of affection at all

2 turns off- Flat-earthers and people who refuse to interact with anything other than my genitals during sex

My best friend- My brother

Sexual orientation- Queer trans man

How tall am I- 5′7″

What do I miss right now- Sleep

Favourite color- PURPLE

Do I have a crush- I do..kind of

Favourite place- My bedroom

What am I listening to right now- My brother play fortnite- but the last song I was listening to was I wanna get better by Bleachers

Shoe size- 9

Eye color- Brown

Hair color- Brown

Meaning behind my URL- I think it’s pretty obvious

Favourite song- Morning in America- Jon Bellion

Favourite band- I really really don’t have one, I listen to such a wide range of music that it’s obnoxious and really hard to pick one

How I feel right now- Tired as fuck

Someone I love- MY CAT

My current relationship status- Single as can be my dude

My relationship with my parents- Stressful

Favourite season- Winter

Tattoos and piercing i have- I have a quill pen tattoo down my left forearm and a septum peircing

Tattoos and piercing i want- So so many tattoos, too many to list on this already long ask. As for piercings idk. I’m good for now but I might drill more holes into my body someday

The reasons I joined Tumblr- I was really into the disney memes

Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? Lucky to say that I do

Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?- It was my dad so…technically yes, yes I have

How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?- It takes 3 seconds to get dressed and an hour and a half to be prepared to see another human being

Have you shaved your legs in the past three days? Nope

Where am I right now? I’m at home

Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? I’m surprised I can still hear

Do I live with my Mom and Dad? I do

Am I excited for anything? NYC PRIDE 2018!!!

Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? Yup

How often do I wear a fake smile? Honey I worked in food service for 5 years, fake is the only smile I know

If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? Melanie Scrofano

What do I think about most? Wearp

Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? Behind for sure, but I’m working on it!

What was the last lie I told? I told my dad I ate lunch

Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online? Video chat. Phone calls frighten me

Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? Yes and yes.

Do I believe in magic? IN A YOUNG GIRLS HEART HOW THE MUSIC CAN FREE HER WHENEVER IT STARTS

Do I believe in luck? Yes I have tons of bad luck so there has to be some good luck making someone else happy out there somewhere

What’s the weather like right now? It was pouring and freezing earlier and now it’s super hot I hate spring

What was the last book I’ve read? I recently reread To Kill A Mockingbird

Do I have any nicknames? Seattle

Do I spend money or save it? I try to save it and then I pay rent and then I pay bills and then I don’t have moneys and then I’m sad

Can I touch my nose with a tounge? I literally can’t even reach my septum ring lmao

Favourite animal? Orcas

What was I doing last night at 12 AM? I knocked the fuck out at like 10

What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? Wildwood by Fleurie

What is my favorite word? Sacapuntas

My top 5 blogs on tumblr? @a-maelstrom @weirdofreakish @wayhaughtship @oliviajoytaylor @earpdearp

If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? Have you tried taking Bikini Bottom and pushing it over there?

Do I have any relatives in jail? I had a cousin in for check fraud a couple years ago but I didn’t know her so all I used it for was threatening my bullies

What is my current desktop picture?- It’s a wearp season 2 cast photo

Had sex? I’ve done the sex

Bought condoms? Hell no you can get those for free I’m a baller on a budget 

Gotten pregnant? Nope

Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? Yeah I don’t mean to brag but she was hella wet

Had job? Several

Smoked weed? I’m high rn so

Smoked cigarettes? I used to when I was in middle school and then I had a crush on this girl who didn’t like them so I stopped and I should really thank her

Drank alcohol? Yup, illegally though because i live in a country where you can go to war before you can drink

Am I a vegetarian/vegan? I’ve tried but I have bad enough eating habits already and it made me eat oatmeal all day cause I’m too lazy to do anything right

Been overweight? I was overweight by a lot about 6 months ago

Been underweight? I’m currently underweight

Gotten my heart broken? Yes

Been to prom? Hell yeah! I took my manager from work and we slow danced to Beautiful by James Blunt

Been in airplane? UNfortunately

Learned another language? I took AP spanish for 7 years

Wore make up? Yup

Dyed my hair? So many times

Had a surgery? Tonsils only

Met someone famous? I’ve met a bunch of bands over the years at Warped Tour

Stalked someone on a social network? Of course

Been fishing? Yup! It’s a right of passage when you grow up on an island

Been rejected by a crush? Of course

What do I want for birthday? I want to give myself this present and I want to have at least posted my first video to my youtube channel

Do I like my handwriting? I love it

Where do I want to live when older? Canada

Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? No my parents are dumb

What I’m really bad at? Playing instruments

What my greatest achievments are- I finally looked at my tumblr theme after like 4 years of not knowing what it looks like and its actually not that bad

The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me- Lmao I can’t think of anything that could be on that level right now but the other day my mother looked me in the eyes and goes “You know your life sucks right?”

What I’d do if I won in a lottery: Damn I’d but a new computer immediately and then move across the world

What do I like about myself- My jawline

My closest Tumblr friend- @a-maelstrom

Any question you’d like? My favorite school house rock song is the Preamble song

Are you outgoing or shy? I’m not shy I just generally don’t like talking to other humans

What kind of people are you attracted to? Kind ones

Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? Maybe? If I’ve learned anything from life it’s that you really never know but I DAMN HOPE

Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? It depends on who it’s with but most of the time no

Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? My friend Shaf

What does the most recent text that you sent say? “No, we’re good.”

What are your 5 favorite songs right now? Icon- Jaden Smith, Bottom of the deep blue sea- Missio, Let you go- Machine gun kelly, little sister- trixie mattel, and In the middle- dodie

Do you like it when people play with your hair? 10/10 would die for that shit

Do you think there is life on other planets? Definitely

Do you like bubble baths? I do but I’m too large for my tub and it’s very sad

Do you like your neighbors? I don’t think I have ever said a single word to a single one of them

Where would you like to travel? San Fransisco

Favorite part of your daily routine? Playing video games

What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? Every single one of my bits

What do you do when you wake up? Wish I was back asleep

Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Darker, I’m pale as fuck

Do you ever want to get married? If I find the right person

If your hair long enough for a pony tail? A tiny one on top of my head

Would you rather live without TV or music? I’d rather die thanks

Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Of course

What are your favorite stores to shop in? Amazon

Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? I guess it depends but mostly yeah

Do you smile at strangers? HA HAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA

Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? I mispelled my name on twitter and was too lazy to change it but today a guy called me out so I changed it and acted like I didn’t because I’ll do what I want sir

Ever wished you were someone else? I used to a lot

Favourite makeup brand? I know nothing about make up

Last thing you ate? Mac and cheese

Ever won a competition? For what? Soccer

Ever been in love? Yes

Facebook or Twitter? Twitter and if you’d like to follow me my name is AmongSeattle

Okay that took a lot longer than I had anticipated but I had a lot of fun. Thank you so much for taking the time to test how much my computer can take before it gives in. Join me next time when I’ll probably be answering 500 questions and encoding my social security into the text :*

Quickly Boost WordPress Website Speed [Ultimate Guide]

Increasing Website Speed

How to increase WordPress Website Speed or How to Boost WordPress Website Speed is one of the most asked questions to me from my clients and students.

Increasing or boosting WordPress website speed has never been so tough even for a beginner. But have you ever asked yourself, Why everyone is trying to make their website faster than before? Many newbie bloggers do not know why and how everyone is making their website too fast so that it can load in just half of a second.

In this blog, I will answer the same question why you should care about your website speed and I will also reveal all the secrets of making a website blazing fast. I promise you that after reading this post thoroughly, and applying all the steps mentioned here, your website will load fast like a Rocket.

So firstly let's see some of the main advantages and disadvantages of a fast website.

Advantages Of Fast Website

Improve Chance of Article Ranking

Significantly reduces Bounce Back Rate.

Increase user engagement on site

Increase Sales and Lead Conversion

Website looks Professional and you build trust among your customers and visitors.

And luckily, there are no disadvantages of a truly fast website.

After showing you advantages and disadvantages, I think now you got the answer of "Why is everyone making their website damn fast?". Now the next question that arises for a normal user is, How to make my website fast? But wait, before we discuss making it fast, let's come to the opposite question, what makes a website slow?

Read More about How to Rank on Google Eaisly without Backlink

What makes a website Slow?

Before solving any problem, we should know deeply about it and research it. Applying the same concept, Before making our website Fast, let see what are the factors that make it slow.

Slow Hosting with less resources and high ping, i.e. High Server Response Time

Non-Optimized HTML, CSS, JavaScript, JQuery etc.

Uncompressed Images

Not Using Properly Scaled Images.

Using Fancy large Themes.

Using Plugins with Bug and Glitches.

Not using a Fast Page Builder.

Using too many Google Fonts.

MYTH - There is a myth that "Using too many plugins will Slow Down your website". But the actual thing that slows down your website speed is Quality of plugins you are using, not the Quantity.

How to Boost WordPress Website Speed?

I will explain here all the things that make a site slow and solutions on how to make it fast.

1.Use Fast Hosting

Hosting is the first and one of the main factors that affect website loading speed. In order to make your website fast, you need to have a top class hosting with fast server response time.

Nowadays many newbie bloggers make the same mistake by choosing a cheap hosting and thinking that after earning from blogging, they will migrate their website to a fast server but wait, this is not going to happen anymore. If you have a slow site, you are not going to rank and without ranking, you are not going to earn. So this plan is falling apart now.

->How Hosting Affect Website Loading Speed

Let's talk about how a website loads on the browser. When you enter a URL in the browser it sends a request to the server to send all the resources and information mapped to that particular URL. Now it's time for server to respond to the browser and send necessary data As Soon As Possible. This is what we call Server Response Time, but cheap hosting does not have that much power and speed to respond to browsers fast and send data.

->Recommended Hosting

I will strictly recommend you to not make the same mistake that every newbie does and fails in blogging. Choose a high rated hosting like

Siteground [Officially Recommended By WordPress ]

Site ground uses google cloud based server even for their shared plan and this is what impressed me about them.

My first priority for hosting is Always Siteground, in fact I use site ground gogeek plan as hosting for bloggertutor.com

Use SGHOSTING as Coupon on Our Website to Get 10% OFF on Official Siteground Hosting Here

Bluehost [Officially Recommended By WordPress ]

Blue host is also a top hosting provider with a quality hosting but blue host India does not have that much quality. Try to use bluehost.com for purchasing hosting and support.

Blue host startup plans are not too good but their higher plans are impressive.

Use BHHOSTING as Coupon on Our Website to Get 10% OFF on Official Bluehost Hosting Here

CloudWays Cloud Hostings

Now the future is going toward the cluster of servers instead of traditional servers, so migrating to cloud servers will be a good move.

Mobile & Desktop Version Speed Using Siteground Hosting

Choosing a great Hosting will boost WordPress website Speed, Read my Full Hosting Review to choose a best hosting for your website.

2. Optimize Coding

This part of website Speed Optimization is a little tricky, but I will make it simple for you guys. Optimization of coding means to properly inline and compress html, CSS, JavaScript etc. so that they render fast and easily on the browser. 

-> Best Plugins to Optimize Coding

There are many WordPress Optimizer Plugin available in market but some of the best that I trust are,

Autoptimize(Free)

WP Rocket(Paid)

SG Optimizer Specially Designed for Siteground Hosting.

Use these plugins to optimize your coding in order to boost WordPress website speed.

SG Code Optimizer

SG Image Optimizer

Note:- Coding Optimization can break your website look, so please do it carefully.

3. Compress And Scale Images

Images are the 3rd main factor that influences website loading speed. I know many of you are already using an image compression plugin but wait, Is Only Image Size Compression Enough? The answer is no, there are several other factors like image format, image size ratio and scaling type. Whoo.. what are these things, Ok let me explain to you one by one.

Image Compression

Image Compression reduces the size of image by merging some pixels of image or by reducing pixels of image.

There is one confusion for many developers that we are reducing the size of pixel or number of pixel of photo during image compression. The answer is we are reducing the number of pixels and hence increasing size of pixels by merging many of them into 1.

The best free Plugin to compress images is resmushit. Some paid plugins like Shortpixel, Imagify and Smush come with more advanced Image Optimization features.

For Siteground users, SG Optimizer has built in an Image Compression feature to optimize your image performance.

Image Format

Now many of you are wondering, what is the role of image format to boost WordPress website speed? For your kind information different type of format store image information using different algorithms. Some popular image formats are JPEG, PNG, WebP etc.

Which Image Format is better? Well, WebP is the best format to use in a website because it is properly optimized for fast rendering in browsers even if scaling is happening from html. The next good one is a compressed JPEG image. The bad one is PNG and hence try to ignore PNG format images in your website.

The best Plugin for Converting images to JPG format is PNG to JPG free Plugin. Some paid plugins like shortpixel, Imagify and Smush come with image format converters by default.

If you are using Siteground hosting, their SG Optimizer has built in Image Converter to JPG and WebP.

Image Scaling

Image scaling simply means deciding the aspect ratio of image.

Now why is it necessary to have a look at image scaling? The very simple answer is because a default scaled image renders fast but html scaling takes time.

So, How to Scale Images? Use any image editor and select aspect ratio and number of pixels according to your need. If you have already Uploaded it to WordPress, use WordPress Image editor to crop or resize it.

4. Use Fast WordPress Theme

This is my favorite part to boost WordPress website speed, because if you have a blazing fast theme with minimal JavaScript and CSS, you do not have to worry about coding optimization. But the most challenging part of this step is choosing a best and fast theme for your blog website. There are millions of fancy WordPress themes with huge coding file sizes which will create a problem for you during coding optimization. I have a dedicated post for the top 5 fastest WordPress theme to supercharge your website.

Here are my favorite best 5 Fastest WordPress Theme list.

GeneratePress

Generate Press is the most lightweight theme I ever encountered with approx all essential features. It comes with a free and pro version.

Kadence

This is the theme I am using on bloggertutor.com and it particularly suits any professional blogger. It is fast, Lightweight, responsive with plenty of premium features but the most impressive thing is it is free.

Astra

I can Guarantee that you must have heard this name before, because it is the fastest selling WordPress theme with all features you need to create an elegant website. It comes with both free and Premium version

OceanWP

Same as Astra, OceanWP is also a very popular and fast theme with good features.

Studio Press Themes

Studio Press Themes are super-fast but they are not free and hence everyone can't afford them. Another thing is they do not provide any fancy look to their theme, you can use them only in blog websites.

So using fast themes will definitely help you to boost WordPress website Speed.

See Astra vs Kadence Theme Comparison and Review

5. Use Fast Page Builder

There are a lot of page builders in the market, but choosing the right one is always a question. Let me tell you something that you can't believe in these fancy days. The thing is people are more attracted by a simple and clean look rather than a complex and colorful abstract design. I know this statement does not fit everywhere but in the case of websites it is 100% applicable.

Page builders like Elementor, Divi, Brizy, WPBakery are too popular, but they have limitations when it comes to increasing a WordPress website speed. There is one that I personally love, Gutenberg Block Editor. Yeah you listen correctly, after using Gutenberg ad-don, this plugin becomes a perfect page builder with blazing fast speed pages. The design created by Gutenberg is simple and attractive and the most important it boosts WordPress website speed. 

6. Use Server Side Caching

Caching is something that can increase your website speed instantly without affecting look of website and resource of server. It works as a mirror image of your website. When browser send request to server, the cache file is served instead of original file digging from server, cached file do not take time to reach to the browser because there is no server process involve in serving cached website.

There are many WordPress Plugin for caching like WP Rocket, W3 Total Cache etc. But you should use Server Side Caching to improve website speed in more effective way. These days all hosting came with any caching system, you just need to ask your provider to how to activate it on your hosting. So using caching system can make your website load fast.

7. Use Content Delivery Network (CDN)

Content Delivery Network or CDN is something that act as a middle distributor for your website files. They have their own server across the globe and when you use them they store your website files to all server and sends data to requested browser from nearest server location to reduce website loading speed. CDNs also have their own inbuilt image optimization and code optimization system that helps to reduce total file size further.

There are many free and paid CDNs in the market like Cloudflare (free and Premium both), Bunny CDN (Premium Only) etc. So you must use CDN in your website to increase your website speed.

8*. Bonus

There is one more thing that slows down your website speed, which is Google fonts. Actually rendering a google style sheet and font takes a lot of time. Many bloggers use different types of google font for g heading, paragraph, quotes etc.  But for your kind information, these plugins slow down your website speed. Sometimes they do not render correctly and disturb the look of the website. So use minimum possible google fonts.

Conclusion

At the end I just want to tell you to follow all the steps honestly to increase your WordPress website speed.

If you like anything in post, just tell your friends by sharing it.

Why websites are slow?

There are many factor involve in making a site slow, some of them are Hosting Server, Site Caching, Coding Optimization, Image Optimization etc.

How to Check website Speed?

There are many tools like google page insight, Gtmatrix, pingdom etc to check website speed but I will recommend you to use google page insight.

Why website Speed Important?

Website speed is important because of many reason like it helps to improve you on page SEO, Conversion, Bounce Back Rate etc.

How to fix a slow website?

Fixing a slow website is not so tough just optimize it's coding, images and use CDN, Caching, Fast SSD Server. It will definitely increase your website speed.

Which are fastest Hosting servers for Website?

There are thousands of hosting providers but only few of theme are providing top class hosting speed. Some of them are Siteground, Bluehost, Hostinger, Cloudways, Hostgator, Dreamhost, WPengine.

Read More https://bloggertutor.com/quickly-boost-wordpress-website-speed/?feed_id=462&_unique_id=5f019dff7a7c6 #wordpress #tools#increase_website_speed #increase_wordpress_website_speed #website_speed

What’s your original series about? :D

HHHH!! I’ve talked about it before on here, a little....FUCK thank you for asking!!! jfjdkajldfsk

The full but long way to say it is that it’s about Samael (the angel of death) falling in love with Lilith and figuring out how to live on Earth after he’s banished from heaven. When I was researching monsters in college I found out that succubi/incubi were the sons and daughters of Lilith and Samael after they slept together. My mind was blown. I fucking love mythology, I love stories about death, and I really like exploring concepts of like....love/life/death being one in the same, so I was FLABBERGASTED that I hadn’t discovered that story earlier on. For a really long time I couldn’t stop thinking about that idea--that there was an angel, who’s job it was to rip humans to shreds and see them at their grossest, most undignified state, that fell so deeply in love with one that he abandoned heaven for it. THAT’S COOL. 

I’m gonna put the details under the cut so that this doesn’t get too long @///@ Sorry mobile-rs... I can’t for the life of me figure out how to get cuts to actually work on mobile without fucking up the desktop version >:(((

Umm.....if you would like an excerpt, I’ll post one. The details got SIGNIFICANTLY longer than I thought they would XD

Sam is kinda lost on Earth because he’s been excommunicated, pretty much, but he knows Lilith is still hanging around because she’s stubborn and won’t die at the hands of whatever “bullshit” Death has taken over the job while Sam’s gone. He can’t die because none of the angels will come to see him.

Lucifer knows Sam is there and wants to have him on his side when the Apocalypse happens because initially Sam was the only one that could kill anything, like, at all. When the war in Heaven happened to take Lucifer out Sam was one of the biggest players. A lot of the angels and archangels are still kind of scared of him, even though he’s technically not an angel anymore. 

People and monsters and demons all like Sam a whole bunch because he was still a frickin’ archangel, you can’t just get rid of that kinda power, and they gravitate to him. He can still tell when someone is going to die, how long they’re supposed to have left, and once they do he knows where they’re going to go. 

The problem is that, when he fell, he still had a pretty big urge to kill people, and as he was waiting for man to come around that got warped in with this huge lust complex. Becoming human was a massive and not really so great transition for him. He’s also, like, a nuclear version of a walking STD because again, his human body needed some way to process that kind of destructive power. He gets everything under control, but it takes some...time...and everyone he sleeps with ends up dying, regardless of whether or not it was there time, which fucks up where their soul goes. Again, that wouldn’t be an issue if he didn’t have the a low-key (high-key) sexual addiction.

SO. THAT SEX ADDICTION STUFF SOUNDS REALLY COP-OUTY, RIGHT? OO-HOO-HOO, HANDSOME MAN EVERYONE WANTS ALSO WANTS TO FUCK BUT boo-hoo, he can’t get close to anyone or they die, poor little boy. Right. That’s a little bit the point. 

Like I said up there, I always thought the idea of love/sex/death being one-in-the-same was super-interesting. It came up so often in classic lit that it became a joke in all my classes--”If it’s not about death, it’s about sex (and it’s probably about both).” I ALSO grew up Christian, but I was really upset with how the lit was taken because, whenever it was presented in church or Sunday school or whichever, it was really boring!! We only ever talked about the same things over and over again, even though there was this HUMONGOUS BOOK RIGHT THERE WITH ALL THIS BIZARRE SHIT IN IT. I also didn’t like how nothing was presented with personality, even though it so definitely had it!! Like!! These are (supposed to be) people!! People have personality!!! People have their own stories!! You can fulfill a plot point and STILL have your own thing going on, that’s literally fucking life, and the Bible is a living text!! So I really wanted to go into classical Judeo Christian figures and explore their personalities in a believable way, that would seem believable. 

I also also really strongly believe (and now I KNOW not everyone agrees, I don’t expect you too, that’s okay) that when we worship something--a deity, a concept, a practice--we’re worshiping the same thing under a different name/presentation/idea. Uhh....in The Sandman, they compare it to a diamond, and how even though a diamond will look like a circle staring straight down at it but a triangle from the side, the diamond itself never changes--it’s only the way you’re seeing it. So I really wanted to talk about all the things I was raised with--God, angels, heaven, hell, evil--and pass it through the lens of other stories. They’ll still be named the way they are in Judeo-Christian mythos, but I really really want to make it so that they could be identified as others, or at least that they have elements of them. God and Heaven/Hell and souls are the names and words I use for them, but it doesn’t mean they’re so much more different from those of other religions. 

That being said, I would really like to weave in monsters too because I FUCKING LOVE MONSTERS MAN I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. I’m going most for the vampire figure here, just because when I’m talking about a figure that’s supposed to cause death, that’s inherently bloody, and who’s whole story is based on taking on this second, nefarious life after sleeping with someone and “dying”...that comes to mind first ^^; HOWEVER I want to explore others--the idea of a monster in man, so werewolf themes, and then the fear behind serial killers and being scared of “the other”... 

This is a lot, and I know it is. Almost none of it will be said upfront and it’s mostly background stuff that, while it would be cool if someone caught on, REALLY is only supposed to affect the feel and weight and reception of Sam. 

Sam is a bad guy, but he’s also a good guy. That’s the whole back-and-forth of Death, right? He ends our time, so he’s bad, and he’s scary, but he’s also there for people in the end and lets them know their job is done. That’s really, really nice. I’m a little nervous because Sam is, for a pretty long while, a monster. He’s SUCH A BAD GUY. But he gets it, and he grows up, and he matures, and he spends a long while trying to make up for it because he feels terrible about everything. He also has to figure out how to get along because he can’t die, he’s in for the long haul. I kind of....if I can do it, I want to get people to a point where they do not like Sam, but then come to love him again. That’s really hard but I’ve read things like that and I hope I can do it. That’s what I like about “living with your monster” stories--they’re about learning that your flaws don’t invalidate you as a person, and that you can still end up good. Sam will be that to an epic level, literally, so his flaws and his good will be the polar opposites on the spectrum...but.....

I really hope I can do it. I really, really hope I can do it. I think I can. @///////@

Once I finish Tumbling Down and tie up some loose ends, I want to really edit everything I have written for it (it’s like.... I suppose around 60k, when you take into the things I haven’t typed up yet) and finish it. If things work out it’s the first book I want to genuinely submit for publishing ///////////

And then there are other ideas I have floating around, but this story is the first ^^;

Posted by Madeline Blasberg

Ever take the time to really think about the gateway into your business’ website? Yes—we’re talking about your homepage. Your website homepage design should be enticing enough to draw “window shoppers” further into your website and to eventually convert them into customers.

If you’ve felt pressured to hire a professional to handle your homepage design (or redesign), you’re not alone—but it’s also (probably) not necessary.

Simply by spending some time to square away your strategy and brush up on current homepage design trends, you can mimic professional web designers (without incurring the expense).

So, drumroll, please… From design aesthetics to user experience, here are ten homepage design trends to help you boost your homepage engagement to draw visitors further into the depths of your website.

Top 10 homepage design trends to help you stand out from the crowd:

1 – Show. Don’t just tell.

Humans have the attention span of a goldfish. According to data by Tony Haile of Chartbeat, a website only has 15 seconds to capture your attention … Because of this, your website has to work quickly to captivate & communicate, and this can be done through captivating visuals. Utilize imagery and photography to convey a message and greater brand story. Let your visual cue’s answer “what’s in it for me” and “what is this business all about” on your homepage design.

A #website only has 15 seconds to capture your attention. That’s why it’s important to utilize imagery and photography to convey a message and greater brand story.

Fullscreen and minimal hero sections can help set the tone of your homepage and bring focus on your business’ main M.O. “The application of hero images can spruce up the design of a web page while also building depth into page content,” says design blog Envato. “Most of these images are photographs which directly relate to the content. But designers have gotten crafty with vector backgrounds, illustrated artwork, and even animated video.”

And when previously designers shied away from below-the-fold designs, this is no longer the case. Now, there is no need to cram everything above the fold as most visitors inherently know to scroll down.

2 – Less is more

Similar to general website design trends in 2019, layouts and sections should remain uncluttered. Minimalism helps focus the message and reinforces a sense of professionalism.

“The fewer elements and content on a website, the less your audience will have to think. If a website is designed in the right way, it will show the user exactly what she is looking for.”– says 99designs

Here’s how to put this tip to practice: incorporate negative space to give elements breathing room and help visitors more easily digest information. If you’re worried about being too boring, consider implementing a minimalist layout spruced with vibrant pops of color—this 2019 web design trend is gaining mass appeal. These drops of color sprinkled in a simple yet effective website design can breathe life into your brand. Just take it from Dropbox, Spotify, Nylon, and Nike.

Keeping your design minimal also aids in your page load speed, which affects conversions, sales revenue, organic search rankings, and PPC ad quality score.

So, what can minify load time, you wonder? Here are some tips:

Use CSS to create animations and path-based design elements when possible

Utilize flat design: open space, bold colors, and simple illustrations—as these are much less data-heavy and load more quickly

“The fewer elements and content on a #website, the less your audience will have to think. If a website is designed in the right way, it will show the user exactly what to looking for.” @99designs

3 – Responsive design matters for your homepage, too

While 30% of all website traffic comes from a handheld device like a mobile phone or tablet, 90% of small business websites don’t design for these devices’ screen size.

Refresher! Here‘s what makes aresponsive design:

It adapts to any screen size

It loads quickly

Flexible images and layout

So, if you thought responsive design doesn’t matter, you thought wrong. Design consideration of user devices is more important than ever. In fact, failing to have a “responsive” site or one optimized for these devices can drive away customers, hinder your search engine rankings and look unprofessional.

To tell if your small business website is responsive, or needs a little work, use Google’s mobile-friendly test tool. All you have to do is enter your URL and Google will rate your website’s mobile-friendliness using handy color-coded guides. (For instance, you will get a green light if your website passes, a yellow light if there is potential for improvement, and a red light if you need a lot of help. It ranks everything from mobile page speed to screen capacity.)

And, remember: if your homepage looks great on a desktop computer, it may not communicate effectively on a smaller mobile device; nor will it load quickly. To design responsively, make sure your visual assets can scale on any device.

4 – Keep it consistent

Utilize design systems to keep typography uniform and your website buttons consistent. This helps visitors understand what to expect from your site as they venture through your website.

As a business owner, your goal is to create massive brand appeal in just a matter of seconds. As the “gateway” of your brand, your homepage should portray a clear brand image. And that image should be consistent with all marketing channels and webpages on your site.

To maintain a consistent brand on your homepage, consider these things:

Your message: Keeping marketing messages consistent in all marketing channels.

Your visual assets: Maintaining consistent imagery (particularly the hero visual) and the color palette is key.

Your tone: Never falter when it comes to swapping the voice, tone, or content of your campaign.

5 – Grayscale it!

Homepage color cultivates a mood and personality. So, are you wondering what 2019 website color trends are out there?

Black, white, and gray can help facilitate that mood. You can tone down your homepage design by converting your color palette into these simple, yet powerful colors.

Why does this design principle work? A few reasons:

It emphasizes textures and shapes while drawing focus on your messaging.

It’s classy (and a little artsy!) if that’s your jam.

It offers an easy way to maintain brand standards as the color palette is simple.

6 – Animation and micro-interactions

“Movement is the visual path a viewer follows when viewing a composition. With proper movement, a composition can create a narrative and provide high-quality user experience,” says Hubspot. Previously movement was achieved through stagnant lines, shapes, and colors, today animation, and micro-interactions are more trendy than ever.

What is a micro-interaction? They surprise the user and create an event that is inviting and human. They can come in the form of GIFSs, chimes, scrolling animations, and pop-ups. 

There are three reasons why animation and micro-interactions rock:

They create moments of delight for the user while reinforcing subtle messaging.

They can serve as visual metaphors to reinforce overarching brand messaging.

They can signal a user to take the next steps—like venture further into your website.

They heighten a sense of interactivity, which helps engage a web visitor. They involve your audience in your website, to subtly transmit information to the users about their actions and usage, and make web pages feel a little smarter.

Ex. https://useless.london/

7 – Diversity

Gone are the days where only middle-aged Caucasian people were imaged on homepages. Today’s person is diverse—in color, race, religion, and beliefs. And brands are finally modifying their marketing to reflect the world’s true population—in a rainbow of differences.

So, it’s vital to include a diverse range of race and gender in photography and illustrations, otherwise, you run the risk of alienating a potential user base. If you’re looking for a good resource on this, look no further than here.

8 – Unique layouts

Walk into any department store and you’ll see products brimming with symmetrical, staggered graphical elements are in. Deconstructed, broken grids are super popular when it comes to not only sweatshirt design, but also homepage design themes. Need to view this idea in real life? Here are some design examples from the Webflow blog.

To think outside the conventional homepage grid layout, do the following:

Vary box sizes

Find a unique way to display your navigation pattern

Switch up hero image placement

Change up type treatments

Modify other cues help organize and prioritize content on the homepage

Try a magazine layout

9- Retro elements

There has been a recent surge of retro-inspired brand elements. Serif fonts, chunky fonts, and 60s inspired fonts are so in. These fonts are emphasized by bright, pop-arty color palettes, playing upon nostalgia and breaking pre-established web design traditions.

Why do this website design  And everyone likes a surprise. Using retroelements breaks up the visual stagnation of traditional fonts and adds character and personality, while also reinforcing the credibility of a brand by playing into nostalgia that surrounds design.

10 – Functionality & User Experience

We are decades beyond the internet’s infancy. When once websites were a set it and forget it endeavor for business owners, today’s website is now known to be fluid. The best homepages out there evolve based on your visitors’ needs.

A homepage layout should not only anticipate user needs, but it should also well-paced. It should answer “Where will my visitors land next?” and “What do my visitors want to know about?”

Focus on the user by helping visitors quickly identify with what you’re offering and determine if their needs can be fulfilled. In addition, it should provide examples and inspiration to help visitors imagine themselves using your product or service. In addition, make sure to provide easy-to-view, sticky navigation, so visitors can easily get to where they need to go on your website.

Pro tip: Take visitors on a journey & build a relationship by offering relevant info in exchange for their email (don’t expect them to book/buy on the first visit). 

Bonus tip: Calls to action

Don’t forget that at the end of the day, you own a business, and businesses need…well – business.

Odds are, your business goals align very closely if not directly with your website goals and should, therefore, be represented accordingly on your website. We’d argue they’re the most important part of your website.

Whether you’re selling something, collecting emails, or getting someone to sign up for your newsletter, calls to action (also known as buttons) is a borderline necessity.

Don’t hide what you’re offering on a secondary or tertiary page, put it right at the top in big bold letters with a button to “buy now” or “get early access” close by.

Bonus tip #2: Favicons

Pronounced /fav-ih-con/.

We have one! Notice the little purple icon on this browser tab?

Favicons have been around for a while and aren’t TECHNICALLY part of your homepage design, but like your homepage, they are often part of your first impression. Also, in a world where internet explorers often have 10k tabs open in their browser, it might be the only piece of your brand visible at the moment. Make it count.

Wrapping up

That’s it! From retro fonts to minimalist layouts, we’ve shared the top homepage design trends of 2019. Get in the trenches—test out which 2019 design trends work best for your business. We trust that you’ll implement these tips with ease and precision!

    Go to our website:   www.ncmalliance.com

10 Homepage Design Trends to Make a Splash in 2019 Posted by Madeline Blasberg Ever take the time to really think about the gateway into your business’ website?

💖 about/byf for mobile 💖

desktop version

don’t follow / block me if 

you’re an adult and produce or/and support content sexualizing minors (includes aging up minors, i.e damian wayne, pidge, etc)

you ship/don’t see the problem with shipping bruce with his children (adopted and blood related alike), damian with his older siblings/batkids, or any incestual / pedophilic / abusive pairings. (if you want to know a more extensive list of dc ships i won’t tolerate, here’s a list. cope ships, as long as they’re not being shown around publicly where they can harm minors and other survivors, are none of my business.)

you ship shaladin (aka sheith, shidge, shance, etc) or allura with the paladins.

also! if you ship canon gay characters in straight ships. (i.e clalec, bellamy x lexa, etc)

you’re friends / follow or interact with any of these blogs (if you want to know why, you can ask me off anon about it)

you believe fiction doesn’t affect reality (here you can find a really well put post in case you’re interested on learning about it.)

don’t tag  / make fun / don’t respect triggers.

you think adults harassing kids is alright or that fandom shouldn't be a safe space.

consider reading this post before following, especially if you're in the dc/sw fandom. (mind the trigger warnings). 

About

Julieta, she/her, 19, latina from argentina

asexual and really into girls.. still questioning if im bi or a lesbian dont @ me

main fandoms: dc, marvel, one direction, archie comics, star wars, the mortal instruments, overwatch, and other tv shows and books. (full list can be found on my navigation which you can only see on desktop rip)

blacklist: nsfw [nudity counts] /body horror / gore / drugs / ace discourse / tim drake / dick grayson / full blacklist 

links:  twitter / pinterest / archiveofourown 

original content:  icons / edits / headcanons / my aesthetic edits / mildly popular text posts / my ramblings (some personal)

band au (under construction):  Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 / questions / based on the au

+blogs: dailyjasontodd / referenceforjulieta / latinxheroes / fyeahkatekane

you can tag me on anything, i track my url if you want me to reblog edits / gifsets / etc. 

i try to reply every ask i get, but sometimes it gets overwhelming so i forget to reply. feel free to shoot a second ask if you think i might have forgotten to answer or if you want to make sure i received it. it doesn’t bother me at all. i also don't mind people contacting me via instant message so if you want to you can hmu there too.

i talk about jason todd a lot, and about stephanie brown, poison ivy, and jayroy/stephcass/jaykyle/joyfire to a lesser extent

faq

where do you download comics?

comixology is a great place to start to buy them, here if you don’t have the $$$ to do so, and there are tons of characters/events masterposts going around, those are way better if you’re trying to download a whole volume. (example, comic-book-journey ) 

where can i start reading [redacted]

jason todd | dc | Stephanie Brown | Stephanie Brown & Cassandra Cain Interactions | Kyle and Jason

why did you unfollow?

probably because of something that applies to my byf [above lol], you don’t tag stuff i have blacklisted (for example, nsfw stuff), were too hateful of something i really enjoy, or you shipped/liked something i dont think its morally right. (or were mutuals w people that do so, soz!)

why do you hate/dislike/etc tim and dick?

post. if i say anything mildly bad about them, i tag it as dick negativity or tim negativity.

where did you get your theme / psd / update tab / etc?

here my credit page in case i’m still using, and here on my reference blog i try to always reblog anything i use on my main/edits/etc.

weren’t you friends with y / supported x / liked x & y?

my post | relevant post | other relevant post | feel free to ask off anon otherwise i delete the ask unless you’re particularly nasty 

fic recs?

  Dc Gen Fics (Jason Todd Centered Mostly) |  fics tag

feel free to ask me to tag something you have on your blacklist

don’t expect me to reply kindly to every ask about characters/ships i have said multiple times i dislike. as i said before, i will probably reply respectfully, but if you know i dislike that certain character/ship, try not to ask me about it because either of us will have a good time, especially if you enjoy what i dislike.  however, you can ask me for explanations if you feel like it. most of the times i don’t hate stuff just because. if i hadn’t replied it before, i will most likely answer your doubts.

answered questions

(i spent like an hour on that banner though it looks gross asf why)

ok so firstly — i’d like to thank all of my mutuals, all of my followers, and all of you who are reading this right now !! i can’t express my happiness upon reaching this goal bc it is just insane?? thank you sm to everyone, literally xx

secondly — the tumblr awards results will be up soon, to all the people who asked !! i’ve nearly decided the winners and they’ll be announced definitely by the end of next week !!

thirdly — i really really wanted to do something on reaching this goal, esp when i couldn’t at 1k because i was too lazy + had far too many projects running (even though i still have many running rn lmao)

so i’ve decided to do something loads of different things bc i literally can’t decide on what to do !! 

THE MAIN FUNDAMENTALS (ooh look at that fancy name)(i read the reluctant fundamentalist a few days ago ok ok) : to apply for any one of these categories, you must:

be following this jily trash

reblog this post

maybe check out my creations?

           the different categories you can enter + important info are under the cut !! 

1.  BLOGRATES 💐

HOW TO ENTER FOR THIS CATEGORY: 

copy and paste this 💐 emoji into my ask box !!

must be following the main fundamentals 

URL: don’t get it / alright / epic / out of this world / LILY EVANS ICON: misc / selfie / alright / epic / out of this world / JAMES POTTER DESKTOP THEME: alright / epic / out of this world / SIRIUS BLACK MOBILE THEME: alright / epic / out of this world / REMUS LUPIN CONTENT: alright / epic / out of this world / HARRY POTTER FOLLOWING: no / +follow / yes (ofc!!) BLOG COMPLIMENT/ADVICE: i’ll give you both lmao — though advice will only be given to blogs who need it ;)

2. ARCHIVE MOODBOARDS 🌷

HOW TO ENTER FOR THIS CATEGORY:

copy and paste this 🌷 emoji into my ask box !!

must be following the main fundamentals 

send me a quote/lyric/phrase or something you want as a caption with your archive moodboard !!

these might take a while, though i promise to do them all !!

note: i’ve never done these before so pls expect smth crap (but then again, all of the things i make are crap so)

3. MAKE ME CHOOSE MOODBOARDS 🌹

HOW TO ENTER FOR THIS CATEGORY:

(this time i will definitely finish them all i promise)

copy and paste this 🌹 emoji into my ask box !!

must be following the main fundamentals

these might take a while, though i’ll promise to do them all !!

make me choose between two characters: ____ or ____

(pls expect them to be crap) 

4. NAME AESTHETIC 🥀 

HOW TO ENTER FOR THIS CATEGORY:

copy and paste this 🥀 emoji into my ask box !! 

must be following the main fundamentals

in the ask, give me your name or nickname 

and that’s all the categories !!

you can enter for all the categories, though this may affect how long your ask will take !!

there’s no fixed deadline for this. it could go on forever !!

please be patient !!

blacklist #liyah celebrates if you don’t want to see these !!

and, thank you so so much to all of you !!

i love you all very very much 💖 💖 💖