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#and i know ppl arent doing it on purpose but it still hurts

stateswscarlet · 3 months

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So what I’m getting materialization is a consequence of fulfillment, but fulfillment is the main purpose and our only goal?

I get that, but why a lot of manifesting advice is oriented to getting in physically if that what makes most people go stuck in this process? 😭

(not saying your advice is badly oriented , I’m referring to most manifestation content on the internet or media)

Also, why do u think delusional people don’t manifest? Is there a deep down feeling that what they’re imagining or feeling is not true? That’s a question that always asked myself. For example those weird celebrity stalkers who firmly believe they’re married to their celebrity crushes, why don’t they manifest that? Genuine question hehe

Love your tweets!

well firstly, would you (or me) have ever been interested in this stuff if it didn’t promise some sort of 3D changes? probably not, idk about you but I came to the community bc of an sp i wanted, which obviously has a lot to do with the 3D. the reason why this goal isnt exactly the best is because NOW that we have all this knowledge and understanding, we NOW know the 3D isnt our goal because it cannot fulfill us. we find this stuff when we are hurt, confused, desperate etc and once were out of that we realize there is a lot more than just “getting” something in the physical. also, most content out there (99%+) focuses on 3D materialization because MOST people teaching it unfortunately do not understand the law at its core, or they are coaches/businesses that need to make a living by attracting desperate people with claims like DO THIS TO GET HIM BACK! and other stuff. that is why you see most content centering around that bc it is how you pique peoples interest lol.

delusional ppl don’t manifest bc they’re pretending and they’re very much aware they are. theyre coping lol. the concept behind this is that they’re trying to convince themselves they have it IN THE 3D when the 3D has nothing to do with them. thats not BEING, thats pretending.for the weird stalkers and stuff, a lot of them have actual mental health issues and problems which contribute to their delusional ways, and as i said above, they are trying to convince themselves its in their 3D which it isnt, not to mention they are still chasing them and being a fan, being obsessed w them, basically doing everything which implies they arent married to them (thank god theyre not some of those ppl need therapy like yesterday)

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sadisthetic · 1 year

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jaya string of fate au

ive mentioned string of fate au a few times here. ive finally put it together into a post. okay so the reason why ive taken so long to transfer this is bc ITS FROM JULY OF LAST YEAR. i wasnt sure if i should lightly edit it or rewrite it. because it started out as me complaining about rebooted and then me fucking craving fanfiction and hurt (i do this 24/7) and then it morphed into this au that also doubled as character/relationship analysis and me fixing rebooted with my bare fucking hands in the context of this au

anyways. jaya string of fate au with emphasis on the heartbreak of s3. half of this was written half a year ago. man i was so mad about s3 back then lol

been thinking about s3 again. whats even more frustrating about the bad het drama. is that they didnt even give jay and nya a proper break up. granted their get together wasnt on screen either BUT IF YOURE GONNA OH SO RUDELY TEAR THEM APART LIJE THAT. THE LEAST YOU CAN DO IS DO IT WITH MORE FUCKING PURPOSE. THE WRITERS JUST PITCHED A WRENCH INTO THE WORKS AT BULLET SPEED JUST BECAUSE! JUST BECAUSE THEY WANTED DRAMA. BUT FOR WHAT!!!!!!!!! MAKES ME FUCKING MAD!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALL IT DID IS DO JAY DIRTY AND NYAS CHARACTER DIRTY

nyas fucking integrity spit on. you didnt have to make her be like that. it just really fucking made her look BAD. god i wont say jay was a perfect boyfriend but he didnt deserve THAT.

anyways. i want a canon compliant jaya breakup fic set in s3 (present jem speaking: I STILL WANT THIS BY THE WAY.) im so certain nobody has written this. i think heartbreak could be a form of whump if you make it hurt enough.

well. technically. it would be more emotional hurt fic rather than whump. but im a guy who has his definitions twisted. this is whump to me. also im a guy who thinks unromantic things as romantic but also loves love thats void of romance above anything else. i can do both. anyways.

i want jay to feel absolutely crushing heartbreak. i want jay to be hurt. i want him to feel it in his chest. unfairness— rending, jealousy— twisting, want— squeezing. all he yearns for is to be with nya. because he loves her. but apparently... nya doesnt feel the same way. and it hurts

i want to consume heartbreak. i think itll be crunchy on the outside but soft and squishy on the inside. absolute chewable pleasure. lightly salty and bittersweet. i also wanna squeeze jays heart like a stress ball and maybe cause arrhythmia. scratch it a little (a lot). jay is my emotional and physical fucking chew toy

and so to make heartbreak a bit more whumpy tho... i thought up of red string of fate au...

in this version of this concept, the red string of fate is something that needs to be tied by the pair together. and the feelings behind it is what gives the string color. but sometimes if a love is fated to be, the red of the string is instantly, intensely vibrant, almost glowing

but you dont know who your soulmate is until you actually get together and tie the knot. it is not preexisting, the string does not connect people together for them to find each other before they even know the other exists. it only exists when two people make the decision to bind each other to themselves. most people dont find their soulmate but because its so often the case ppl are content with someone who isnt bc you dont need to find love in your soulmate alone, love is abundant in other places. but that isnt to say the red string of fate isnt romanticized in society tho. anyways. nya likes jay and their string is a pleasant warm red thats a little pink. its typical color for those who arent soulmates but its ok

jay is a little smitten in a slightly overbearing way tho. i think they are a couple who are a little bit mismatched in terms of showing affection. and also nya is very independent type so jays chivalrous tendencies grates on her a little but she lets it slide bc to her, jays positives outweigh his negs. hes cute and funny and they both can geek out and bond over tech stuff. thats a part of the fun.

but then the match maker thing happens and nya doesnt immediately start considering cole as a romantic interest. but she does start... considering things tho. why cole could be her match. and if he really is her soulmate. why isnt jay her perfect match? its less nya becoming interested in someone else and more nya examining herself to think about what she actually wants for herself and what she wants in a person and if jay really isnt the right guy for her in the end. she doesnt know if cole would actually give her what she wants more than jay does. but she does grow more aware of the mismatch between her and jay

but before anything could be done about her doubts and dismiss it all and just carry on with their relationship, jay finds out in the trailer and is devastated. and intensely jealous of cole.. because hes been a bit insecure about his and nyas relationship for a while now also. he jumps the gun too quick before nya could reassure him so then that Fight happens and things get messy and ugly really fast. jay makes himself look really bad in front of nya which unfortunately reinforces her doubts in jay and she thinks. maybe they shouldnt be together after all.

and so one night nya talks to jay alone. she explains herself. how shes been feeling about them. how she wants to focus on herself. and that hes too much for her and hes stifling her and she thinks it would be better if they cut things off and go back to being friends. and then she cuts the string that binds them together before jay could even object. it stings for nya but for jay it feels like his heart was sliced in two. literally. he feels a sharp pain that makes him clutch his chest. for nya, she had more time to process the severance. because she was sorta falling out of love for a while. her side of the string has become desaturated and dull. which is why she doesnt hurt as much

she doesnt realize how much jay truly loves her and how much it would hurt him when the string was cut. so when jay falls to his knees, tears falling, she just turns and walks away because she thinks its just from the heartbreak. she knew she was breaking jays heart

she doesnt realize how much hes literally hurting, how she left his heart bleeding. she knew but she didnt know. its most painful experience jay has ever felt in his life. a searing ache. theres a sudden painful void instead where there once was nyas love. its loss that was much too abrupt

heartbreak cant kill a person but it can leave them wounded. and with an abrupt disconnection like that, its why jay hung onto those feelings for nya for months after even tho he never acted on them. his half of the string refused to wither away and he didnt want to discard it either. how could he when he still loved nya. but he couldnt do anything about it though. nya made up her mind. and jay knew her well enough that she would probably hate him more if he chased after her. and so... he kept his feelings close to his chest and his sad, loose thread wrapped around his finger tight all the way until skybound...

—

okay. now present day jem speaking. that was the end of original story i had written on twitter... its meant to be a missing scene (inbetween seasons) fic + au. canon compliant except for the fact its set in this au. so skybound more or less carries out the same way. except minor details being changed...

such as nadakhan approaching jay. he tells him he cannot fix or create strings of fate. but he can give him other means of winning nyas heart...

although this isnt a part of the “fic” i do imagine at the end of their divorce era.... nya who had casted away her old string, remakes her string to tie to the end of jays (and her) old one where she cut in. the thing is making strings of fate is something anyone can do regardless of being fated to be or not. what the string of fate is in this au is more of an oath... an intention to be together to the end of time. the two people are choosing to bind their fate to each other. nya, who had felt stifled in a relationship and decided she didnt need to be in one back all the months ago, realized something in skybound.... the string of fate isnt a contract or a shackle. not like how she thought... its a sentiment of how much you care about somebody to want to be connected forever. till death do us part. and jay very sincerely wanted that. he wanted to be with nya forever. and nya realizes... despite all his flaws, she really cares about him. she does want to be with him forever. she wants to be together with everyone, all her friends, her family forever. i think she doesnt know the nature of her feelings for jay. they are a bit conflicted and shes not sure how to sort out her desires from her feelings. but i think she decides to give jay a second chance of sorts. when they tie the loose ends the color on nyas side is an ambiguous grey barely tinging pink

she tells jay she doesnt want to just get back together. she wants them to start over. and jay isnt sure what that means. and by the color of the string hes not sure if it means theyre dating again either. its a very ambiguous ground theyre standing on. but... jay takes the fact that nya retied their string to mean something. that nya isnt rejecting him anymore. that she cares. that he means something to her. it gives jay hope. his feelings for her havent changed... but he decides that to just be. and take things slow. hes happy even if hes confused by what nya wants. hes connected to her again.... and that means so much to jay

i think that their relationship from the end of skybound and onward is a bit more slowburn. well its a weird sorta slowburn. because theyre together but not really. its about them figuring their relationship out. and also nya falling back in love for reals. i love navigation of ambiguous relationships. i think for a while for nya the term “girlfriend”/“boyfriend” is more loaded than the term “soulmate”. thats how fucking weird their relationship got. whats not ambiguous is that nya does love him. she wouldnt have retied their string if she didnt. whats ambiguous is the nature of that love.... its not quite platonic but shes hesitant to call it romantic. whatever. they have time to figure it out

okay. that turned out so much more aro than i was intending. but i do like leaving it like that tho. feelings are difficult to navigate arent they sometimes? how they figure it out is up to whoever. love is love. they are more than “just” friends. but romance itself is a difficult and different beast than love. but jay and nya.... they meet halfway somehow. even if it takes a bit of work

ALSO. LOOK AT THIS ART BY DAN @rotten-dan he drew it for me several months ago when i first finished this au’s original thread which ended at the breakup skdjgthulkd. HEARTBREAK!!!!!!!!!!! YEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you again dan for drawing this for me

—

also. heres some bonus supplemental worldbuilding that doesnt pertain to story stuff but fleshes out how i picture the world in this au to work. most of this was written to answer dans questions about this au lol... not necessary to read unless if youre interested in my take of string of fate concept lol. or unless youre interested in the bit about bruiseshipping in this au at the very end

the string is often attached to the ring finger. so its a very romantic gesture when couples tie it together to each others fingers. like putting wedding rings on each other but its more of a cute fluffy thing rather than binding. not ceremony but its a Thing. its the same level of formality as asking someone out. and string is like. supernatural. its not completely physical but its definitely exists and can be touched. but not as if a literal string is tied to them if you know what i mean? like if the pair are far apart then the strings middle isnt visible but the ends that are tied floats towards the direction of their partner. the string is like. metaphysical. its a perceivable, somewhat tangible representation of love

but if desired the string can be cut if the parties want to separate. but it usually hurts. like a lot of breakups do.

okay so. the thing is with like. almost all soulmate aus. is that they know about their soulmate. or that the evidence of who it is is instantly visible. and like..... that sorta kills part of the fun? of falling in love?

so what if they dont know until they decide to try each other out first. thats the like. the thought behind the set up for this

like. theres sometimes the occasional dumbass whos going off constantly try to find their soulmate but ultimately a soulmate isnt someone you can simply Search for and find. so those kind of people end up being pricks who never will find a soulmate in their life because they dont want to work things out with ppl who arent their soulmate. the pursuit of a soulmate will usually end in disappointment

but sometimes. for the people who do find their soulmate. its because they gravitated to each other in the first place.

like they fell in love with each other naturally. they liked the person for who they are. and so they decided to get together because they enjoy the other person so much. so when they realize they are meant to be they laugh like oh of course! they were meant to be. theyre like the hallmark movie couple of couples and the few of the very lucky ones

not being soulmates doesnt mean you can only fall in love with your soulmate tho. you can fall in love with anyone. regardless of whether theyre your soulmate or not. and even if theyre not. why does that fucking matter? the important thing isnt that they arent meant to be, but that they love each other anyways. isnt that more romantic? fuck fate the one i love is you

usually nonsoulmate relationship take more work. because the instant perfect chemisty of fated couples isnt there. buuuut. isnt that how love is like in reality? love is work sometimes. love is sometimes hard. but love is also worth it. so making the decision to work for it is more easy the more youre in love. not always the case. but in the healthy couples its usually the case

previously that the feeling behind the thread gives it its color. so. the string can end up being a different color if the feelings felt arent romantic love. most people dont know this though bc ppl who usually tie it are couples. and also it takes both of them to tie the string. every single relationship has a theoretical string color. its just most people who actually want the string are couples usually couples. and so for example, most aros dont ever even think of trying to tie it with someone bc they dont want that kinda bind. but if a curious aro wants to try it out bc they are questioning about their best friend if the two of them agree just to see. their string could actually be a different color than red. because the feelings behind it are platonic

its also entirely possible for a string to be entirely black between enemies hfhjskl. but however those kind of pair would usually NEVER tie the string together bc you know hbghsk. enemies. but if they were. it would be that color. but maybe some insane enemies who are obsessed with each other would do it tho. you know fated enemies and such

..... i have thoughts about bruiseshipping in this au also. theyre best friends, they can bind each other if they wanted to. they have the mutual sentiment required to. but due to the culture surrounding the red string of fate specifically, they never think to. even if they did consider it once they didnt ever bring it up bc awkward!!!!!! the string of fate is the symbol of love. couples treat it a bit frivolously but it is a loaded thing. the string of fate is conversely isnt strictly about love but its just often the case when you want to connect the souls of two people for eternity its usually because of love. theoretically i think their string color would actually oscillate between black and their standard representative color (maybe ill go with light blue lol....) depending on if theyre fighting or not. because it would be funny if it did. also. i think they might try it only after jay and nya retie their string of fate. because then they see its an option to tie strings of fate nonromantically. so theyre like... hey.... do you wanna like... just see? and thats that. two besties bound. jay has two strings of fate now

hysterically it would be funny if all the ninjas did it to each other. it would be a mess. but a colorful one. you know those ship charts where ppl draw lines for their otps and notps. its like that but its not shipping its just relationships and also every single person is connected to every single other person. not saying it has to happen in this au its just that the image of it is so fucking funny to me i had to say it. it would be useful tho if they wanted to find each other wherever they are. practical

maybe they should do that. idk

anyways. thats the end of my au. the post is longer than my og thread of it hjhklkjlkghjf. anyways. thats my weird subversion of string of fate au for jaya. writing the endgame jaya part tonight made think again. damn. im so fucking aro. i think the way i write romance always turn out not so romantic because of it. but also. THIS IS PEAK ROMANCE. SUBVERT BORING ROMANCE TROPES INTO SOMETHING LESS AMATANORMATIVE AND MORE INTERESTING FOR YOUR ENRICHMENT. I RECOMMEND IT. ITS MORE FUN. thats my biased aro ass speaking tho. but for reals. subvert tropes. find out what makes something truly romantic. anyways thanks for reading all of this. i am very fond of this au..... especially for the breakup scene lol...............

#my concepts #jaya #jem.txt #ninjago talk #its shorter than hanahaki au at least #also this is THE MOST aro take on string of fate possible #there might be typos it is 5:30am #ninjago

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gayspock · 1 year

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okay girlies trek movie marathon ahead go go go we're starting with the final frontier

so to set the mood its 10am and i have hot cocoa (fancy one i got for chrismas + marshmallows (vegan ones i got for chrismas)

goodness fucking gracious they really put the budget into this one again didnt they. i mean i know they do for the trek movies in general in comparison to the shows but fuck me this feels like a step up even from tvh

okay girlie pops lets do therapy in the desert . practice mindfulness with me really think about the sand on your feet ow hot hot hot

i wish someone would do this to me to be honest i take the piss but cant some beardy vulcan cunt come up to me and chat about starships and the whatnot

ISNT THIS SYBOK BTW. spocks first retroactively added sibling. btw i wont share how much i hate that fucking choice in so many ways and how theyve done it fucking twice n- sorry seeing red breathe deep. hesgot a good presence t-

AHRHGHGH OGUGHHFHFUAHDHHGF FUCK I FORGOT THE TREK THEME DOOO DODODOOO DOOOD OOO MY PUSSSYYYYYYYYYY SOAKEDDDDDDDDD SHES MAKING THE SAME NOISE SH oh christ i took that one too farback up back up

i sometimes think theres no way ppl read these lbs but if theres one person there hi the credits are rolling

guys the hot cocoa is making my tummy hurt btw but that might also be okay so i got this vegan kebab meat and i didnt know you meant to cook it so i ate the whole pack raw and it was already expired but its like vegan so it cant like be like meat levels of insanity right..... right like im not getting worms am i its. uhm. whatever guys hesclimbing

wheres he going .

dude

I SAW CLIPS OF KIRK CLIMBING UP THIS BIG FUCK OFF MOUNTAIN BEFORE AND I KNEW BILLY SHITSTER PUT THIS IN TO WANK HIMSELF OFF BUT I THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO BE A PLOT RELEVANT SCENE WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE CUNT IS JUST DOING IT FOR THE JOKES

THERES NO WAY THIS IS SO FUNNY . KIRK COME BACK DOWN FROM THERE

hi bones- OH MY GODDDDD HIS CUTE LITTLE JACKET HES SO CUTEEEEEEAND HIS LITTLE SCARFFFFF

PUT THIS CUNT RIGHT ONTO YOUR PINTEREST BOARDS LADY HES-

okay ffucking hell the way william shatner still says "spock" i forgot it was like that

"1200 points of interest in yosemite and you pick me" right i forgot they were like that

his spoots.........

that made me laugh i wont even lie the way the cunt just feel

can we get a close up on the dancer cat woman please just for uhm my own . purposes interests i dont - OH HERE WE GO- THREE TITS?

WHOS THIS GIRLBOSS

CAITLYN KATELYN KAITLYN whichever its spelled- also romulan??? i assume that there's been some cultural mingling but imagine if you met a fucking cunt from mars called Sarah.

anyway shes beautiful as hell . for what reason.

seriously the dusty desert planet in scifi they all look the same its so funny

right the prblem is syboks actor is charming as all hell. fucking divert that smoldering gaze i feel fucking weird as hell

OUGHHH SCOTTYYYYYY HII BABYYYYY CAKESOUGHGHH HI ENTERPRISE OHHHHH HIIII UHURAAAA

oh my god she looks so good she LOOKS SO GOOD ... ahh nichelle 3: ... shes got such a good onscreen presence though man HELL its a shame they didnt utilise her more earlier

okay so they decided to put them together i forgot about that im not mad i gues

sulu and chekov hi guys theyre just vibing in the woods HI GUYS SORRY IM NOT IMMUNE TO NOSTALGI AND SEEING MY FAVOURITE GUYS

GUYSSSSS CAN WE ALL BE NICIESSSSS

"ive always known i'll die alone" ALRIGHT GIRL...

this is actually so cute i wont even lie im not endeared im not (is endeared) theyre on freaking holiday together

MARSHMELLON

SPOCK THEY ARENT VEGETARIAN

except for mineeeee that i have om nom nom

afterthe ritual camp sing along we all have insane freaky gay sex onscreen for the rest of the movie. its normal. it would also be less gay than them singng row row your boat like this

im absolutely ctazy for the sfx in this movie like it feels like half of them are pretty solid but theres just random bits that look so janky this is exactly how i want my star trek i wont even lie to you

also i cant tell if this klingon part is meant to have subtitles or not

ok i found the script online + im following along iwth that LOL ... i guess it makes SENSE why the actual subtitles arent like on the video itself but its still funny

sorry to be crass but i know someone somewhere has edited this to say spock (goes off to do that)

the way it takes me 10 million years to watch a movie you have to understand theres sidequests in every movie for me to do

GOD....

THE UNIFORM JACKET WITH THE JEANS THIS IS EVERYTHING TO ME. ABSOLUTE SLAG MOVES. COME ON SERVE ME CAKE CASUAL STYLE

i love it when the enterprise is busted to be honest its so good i hate functional ships i love it when theyre breaking- fuck me i wanna relisten to wolf 359

i already know the plot twist of that being his brother but its very fucking funny nonetheless that spock just sees his broth-

UI WASL

I WASLITERALLY JUSY ABOUT TO SAY THAT ITS VERY FUNNY WHEN SPOCK SEES HIS BROTHER AND IS DEAD SILENT LIKE "THATS SO ME AND MY BROTHER WE DONT NEED TO TALK LIKE THAT"

AND THEN MY BROTHER DEAD SILENT PUSHES A BIRTHDAY CARD UNDER MY DOOR. THROIWING UP. COSMIC TIMING THANKS BUD

by the way ive actually heard a lot of bad things about this movie and im absolutely agreed that this is corny as fuck but frankly when it comes to tos movies... im actually on board if its corny, even if the story might suck in the end. i mean granted- im hardly into the meat-meat of the movie yet. i dont doubt people slate it for NOTHING, and i presume i'll understand the problems better the more i watch (after all i am already kind of irritated with syboks existence even if i do quite like the actors vibe) but its like... hm how do i put this...

im not actually ever against, like, "nostalgia bait" stuff , i guess, and having fun with things if its kinda a) self aware enough and b) well earned. does that make sense? if it isnt taking itself too seriously and bigging itself up in a dramatic way, AND there's a solid foundation to actually have fun with then im okay with a movie that kind of only spins on the funnier, more casual moments and is somewhat self-indulgent in terms of how it panders to fans with, like, showing them all having fun camping .

the issue for me is when its either, as i said, unearned or trying to take itself too seriously... or maybe, like, when it does veer too close to flanderisation or even just spinning the wheels on the characters. its why i think a lot of chibnall doctor who doesnt realyl work when its trying tobe "fun" or "goof off with the fam" like... you guys never really did the legwork to establish these characters well enough to have that, you know?

and im not saying tos has marvellous character work- we can be honest, and say that outside of the triumvirate theyre all over the place- but i do think theyre solid enough to crry and im well okay with that yeah?

and anyway thats all to say. ive known too many pretentious types disavow all sorts of media that does kind of act a bit self-indulgent or does something fun/stupid and i dont know man i do agree in many ways but also, like, entertainment is sometimes meant to be entertaining and its hardly the worst ever if a star trek movie just fucks about a bit instead of doing some epic space opera every single time, nor does it ruin the entire franchise or work that came before it. its why i really fucking rate the voyage home- because it lets itself take the time, take the breather after the other three movies. like i understand if it does purposefully undermine something else but like... i dont know i feel like some people ironically have such a shallow mindset sometimes where theyre likt, fucking hell, its the death of all media because they were silly 1 time and did something a bit funny/had fun (esp if it isnt just to their tasts)

(adnd yeah its also like... i dont know you know osme ppl who seem to have 0 media awareness in terms of like.. yeah man you can wax pretentious gobshite all you want but also its star trek man and thats not to belittle the franchise in any way but also manage expectations of what youre going to be consuming AND also realise that its not BAD that not everything is, like, you know some high calibre art and that actually that diversity in art is kinda better for your media diet tbh like they all serve a diff purpose like- you know so unrelated its also like im sorry it reminds me of all the discourse around knives out and the such and people not taking that movie into context and whatever the fuck or ALSO how im watching bsg lright now and i know im tempering my expectations interms of what that will deliver, what it will do and even further than that the actual politics)

( BC THAT ALSOOO is a whole other thing im so off topic here where its like im obbiously not talking about genuinely harmful media here but ive seen some ppl online kind of assume that media has to cater to their exact political alignment or else it isnt good and its like i absolutely agree you can analyse/dissect that and with bsg i do sort of like look at it and think well are we being serious with what we're doing here but also like eh shrug its kinda weird when you go in with the intention that apiece of art has to come to your exact own personal conclusions about the world by the end of it do you know what i mean . like i dont even mean tht in terms of like.. trying to defend things, but i mean that in terms of your own personal growth and open mindedness and appreciation for others' worldvew... anyways im so off topic im so so off topic this is literally the final fontirer 1989 here)

anyway im like

IM THE WORST IM RAMBLING LIKE THIS WHEN IVE BATRELY WATCHED THE MOVIE BC LOL #ANNOYING WHEN THIS ISNT EVEN RELATEDDDDDD

my point is i feel like what ive seen so faris kinda fun and the dialogue though corny and whatnot has made me smile enough that i feel like if this is gonna be sustained throughout im not gonna be mad if the overall plot does suck which idk is contrary to what i thought before i started bc ive heard such bad things about this one

which hey i guess theres other stuff behind that too because going back to that self-indulgent part.... it is obvious billy shits is, as i said, having a long self pleasure session . i also know theres other problems there tbh too-yeah...

ANYWAYS

can someone edit in them kicking their legs and giggling 👆

OK I SAID ALL I SAID ABOVE BUT THE UHURA SCENE WAS THAT ONE NECESSAY GUYSSSSSSS

also my god i eed to stop pausing ive been watching for almost 2 hours and im 40 minutes in thats so fucking funny

sybok: "ok but dude i didnt want anyone to dieeeee i was joking"DUDE PLEASE

the catgirl is feral i repeat the catgirl is feral

oh so it turns out the hostages are rather cheeky

WHY DID THEY HAVE TO CHANGE THEM OUT OF THEIR GOOD OUTFITS UGHHH BOOOOOO LOSERS BOOOO at least sybok is slaying does he have long hair? i do like that; i do appreciate that

"which will take...?" "exactly 15.5 seconds" "AN ETERNITY, DURING WHICH-"

I GET WHAT THEY MEAN BUT LOL

can i also say i think i said this when watching bsg but i love how many scifi ships have a lets fuck off really fast mode. its so fuckinh funny.

YHE GIRLS ARE FIGHTTIGNNGGGGGGGGGGGGG

"PICK IT UP" I LIKE HOW HE HAD TO BE TOLD.

AND SYBOK IS LIKE BE SERIOUS I KNOW YOU ARENT GOING TO D- SHOOT HIM? KIRK. BE SERIOUS . HE WONT DO THAT

KIRK YOU BEST NOT BE GOING INTO A STROP LEAVE SPOCK ALONE WILL E VERYONE LEAVE SPOCK THE FUCK ALONE

can i also say . sarek is a right fucking whore. how many wives did he have . like after amanda how many human women did he go through exactly

okay so round about this point i got distracted for another half fucking hour guys its so ufnny how long it takes me to watxh movies

THE WAY THEY JUST KNOCKED SCOTTY OUT. COME ON GUYS HELP

jim being tired climbing up when he literally beasted that mountain come on behave

THE SPOOTS ARE MAKING ME GIGGLE SO BADLY sorry.

the way they all got on together.... please... i will say BOTH times ive expected spock to straight up bridal carry kirk somehow

also i will say god . throwback to pk wars; im still laughing at how farscape presented the eidelons as, like, the answer to peace when its literally brainwashing just like this and its totally unacknowledged. anyways

WHY ARE WE GIVING BONES DADDY ISSUES

THIS IS SO FUNNY ACTUALLY

IM UNDERSTANDING MORE WHY THIS MOVIE IS DRAGGED BUT I CANT EVEN HATE IT ITS FUNNY TO ME BONES WE'RE GIVING YOU THERAPY TONIGHT

its so funny with bones they just give some random horrors to him whenever the fuck you know and then its never brought up again god love god bless

sarek can be so....

sarek can be so funny im sorry i know this isnt the time im watching him reject infant spock but do you remember in tng when he and picard were... well... they were well acquainted pen pals werent they if you understand me . its like hes a whore . hes a terrible father. hes like the worst. but hes kinda funny sometimes.

OKAY SPOCK SLAYED THAT GET HIS ASS

BONES LOYAL TO THE BESTIES

igotdistractedgaian guys btw this is so bd its like 1pm i started this at 10am but do you know what i need some new shoesso i needed to go find some and research do you know what i mean

i focus now i focus

THE GANG MEETS GOD. WHY NOT.

i always find it outrageously funny whenever they meet god or go to eden in sci fi . beyond hysterical. why not guys hes just been chilling somewhere why not babes .

KIRK BEING LIKE EXCUSE ME ☝️🤨...?

SORRY THATS SO FUNNY . HEY GOD. EXCUSIES. SCUSIES. [GETS HIS TITS BLASTED OFF]

thats funny as fuck

AGAIN IM SEEING MORE AND MORE WHY THIS IS CLOWNED ON THIS IS RANDOM AS ALL HELL BUT ITS FUNNY AND SO INCOHERENT AND THE PACING IS ALL OVER . GOD BLESS THIS MESS

"but captain we're firing directly on your position" can you have a little fucking fun for once chekov light it up bitch

HE SAID OOIEEE YEOWCH

woah he said damn... he said damnnnn

are you about to say sorryyyyyyyyyy

THATS SO FUNNY

THE KLINGON GUY JSUST SAID SOWWWWYYYY I WONT DO IT AGAIN BWAA..... THATSSO FUCKING FUNNY

GOD

YOU WERE NEVER ALONE... DUMBASSS.

PLEASE CAPTAIN. NOT IN FRONT OF THE KLINGONS FUCKING HELL. GAY ASS

"i lost a brother once. i was lucky i got him bakc" you guys remember when kirk actually lost his brother like hsi real life brother who died

OUGHGHH OH MY GOD THEIR OUTFITS BY THE CAMPFIRE YESSSSSSSSS

CANT WE GET JUST A MOVIE OF THEM CAMPING SORRY THIS WAS THE HIGHLIGHT OF THE MOVIE LIKE THE REST OF IT WAS DEAD BUT I RATE IT FOR ROW ROW YOUR BOAT

HELP...

OKAY THATS OVER

SALUTATIONS I NEED TO TAKE ABREATHER BUT THEN WE'RE ONTO UNCANNY COUNTY

#Egg.txt #undescribed image #star trek liveblog #this is so funny bc last year i didnt get to continue the marathon + my autistic ass said #''you can only continue it on THIS day'' so i seriously have been waiting like #2 years to finish the trek movies isnt that funny as fuck

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gr1evance · 11 months

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posting a big grievance infodump from late last night under a read more. about some semi obscure god lore that doesnt really make it toooo much into the story but still contributes to motivations and such. and i just generally like the way this ties itself together in how i wrote it so i wanna share it

making worlds for gods is kind of all theyre meant to do its actually part of the reason ronnies depression gets really bad bc like. every god is different but they will generally have at least soooome kind of longing or feeling of obligation to be doing that. and ronnies was really bad but it was like essentially punishable by death to not just like sit and do nothing basically so it contributed to his depression a lot. but once a god like makes a world has one or has multiple its like. a commitment for eternity or until that world is gone. anything bad happens to it it will make you tired or sick if you try to neglect it it will make you tired or sick. if you are not doing nothing except looking after it you are tired and/or sick. in atrophy theres a decent amount of shadow gods who have worlds and most of them just kind of do nothing but that but like. this isnt really an ironed out plot beat but theres supposed to be one that lobotomy sends after nix and co. whos apparently been trying to multitask and the second they have to get into a fight they like. straight up just keel over and die. and thats why ronnie comes back. again thats not ironed out and could change but its my current way of showing what gods having a world is kind of like in the story. so yeah theyre not just like guys who are strong they really do have godly obligations most of them just. dont. bc its a big commitment its like. having a baby if the baby was ever present and never stopped screaming the mortals that they make are also the mortals they can like. 100% do anything to bc mortals from other universes or anything like ppl rift nix talk to basically just cant hurt him and he has like. super strength compared to them. could pop them like a grape. but theyre not ones he made so he cant like. turn them into a cube or something which is mostly restrictions to keep them from being absolutely super all powerful in rp or anything both options are kind of meant to feel kind of suffocating bc gods arent really. mmmeeeaaaant to be people theyre meant to be machines that do their godly duty and nothing else. but theyre also people. and they have to deal with being people. and i feel like a lot of grievance is kind of just people having to deal with being. people the thing is even if asterisk wasnt there doing that most of them STILL wouldnt just bc. well theyre people and theres other people there and theyd rather be with the other people than. essentially working forever. the reason ronnie at the end of atrophy doesnt start doing actual god stuff is bc nix and vinny are there now and theyre more important to him than anything he feels obligated to do. i imagine especially for the rift gusbands getting out of the purpose and living in a real mortal world that has change and constant movement and countless people must be so freeing. because the purpose is kind of just a soulless husk of a place to live theres. nothing there. unless you make it. and these gods sit around and do nothing because they dont know any better but living in a mortal world they can learn to outgrow that. i just think its really beautiful to think about. being literally made to do something and not being allowed to and its crushing because you cant do the one thing tou were made for. but then youre free of those rules but instead of turning to that obligation you realize. you dont have to do what you were made for. you can just live. you can do anything and go anywhere and be anyone and be WITH anyone you want. you can just live i also think its very pretty in my head how certain things like this end up tying nix and starb together as characters when they can seem so distant from each other in concept. but theres little details where theyre the same. someday they can both learn that they dont have to be what they were "made" to be they dont have to only ever look after a world they dont have to be a murderer they dont have to be a weapon they dont have to work nonstop for the sake of other people. they can just be themselves. thats a sentiment they both learn in the end

#captains log #grievance

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wetslug · 2 years

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2, 3, 6, 8, 10, 18, 19, get well soon!

thank you!! im actually rlly grossed out bc i just woke up in a pool of sweat so even though i dont have a thermometer i think im running a bit of a fever :/

2. what is your preferred method of non-physical self destruction? oof, i dont do this so much anymore but id used to read very sad fanfics to push me over the edge, or id look at those gore sites. now that im Medicated™ im more likely to listen to music that'll make me sad on purpose or overeat til my stomach hurts.

3. what is your favorite way to self care? making plans w people and actually following thru!!

6. what is something that you’ve always wanted to do but have never been able to do? date or have any romantic intentions w another person... idk if this is a gay thing or a low self-confidence thing but ive just never dated :/// ive tried dating apps recently but i almost feel like its an accidental catfish bc i think i look Ok in photos but then i look a lil fucked up in person lmao

8. what is something that gets to you that you wish wouldn’t? i cant handle joking/light-hearted needling about my insecurities :///

10. tell me about an insecurity you overcame. when i was HS-age i rlly hated my weight (plus it gave me gender dysphoria) and id calorie restrict but now i just dont give a shit... im not 100% happy w my body but the changes id want to make arent entirely related to weight

18. what is something you can’t bring yourself to get rid of? for some reason i hang onto shoes that r too big for me??? as if my feet will still grow?? im 23??? hello

19. tell me something you don’t like telling the people you are close to. im pretty open w/ everyone i know (bc i have no filter or shame alas) but something ive always experienced that i obviously dont want to brag about is my weird inability to truly value n connect w friends...i value what they provide for me (companionship) but i feel like on an individual level i dont view them as distinct ppl in my life and so theyre almost interchangeable ?? am i a freak idk

#ask game -

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papers4me · 3 years

Text

Fruits Basket Manga Review , ch 111

sigh~~~ I feel that my recent posts are a bit negative towards the anime, but thats cuz the chapters I’ve read so far are either unbelievably important character depth content cut for no valid reason or content in the anime but packed with million other things that it lost its purpose or importance. Basically tohu’s ep 6 which consists of 4 chapters & now ep 5 which is a momiji ep & yup, packed with 4 chapters as well... so, I apologize for any negativity, my intention is just analyzing artistic & story-telling aspects, I love se03, but yeah it screwed up lots of important characters due to its not so thorough plot decisions & harmful character insight choices.

today.. we explore Momiji... but only before his curse breaks.

Furuba anime struggling to know how to design an episode based on various plot-heavy chapters?

so, they decided 13 eps, & decided one ep for momiji cuz motoko’s graduation & the fanclub is the core of the furuba & have already cut tons of tohru, cuz who cares? she’s kind. be like her. end of lesson. No. really, jokes aside, how to do this?

How to combine several chapters in one ep? collect small snippets from chosen chapters/content like a bee does flowers? you gotta skip some content, you gotta highlight others. The ep is only 20 min after all & you got an op & Ed that you cant always skip.... so.. furuba team decide that momoji’s ep should be true to his zodiac animal, this is the rabbits last appearance in spirit. so, they went with quick hopping from one chapter to the other like a rabbit?

No really, ep 5 is really like a rabbit in its flow, you can’t savior a moment enough before jumping to the other: we learned momiji grew up!! loves toheu romantically, challenged kyo, really meant it, wanted a fair love game, got freed, lost tohru romantically & faced momiji! but that’s not all? we still have space!! quick add akito’s moodiness & love triangle with her dog & her submissive bed partner, add a happy comedy for no reason whatever & make shigue kiss tohru & wish shes 'was his lover instead!!!!!!!!! Mind you all this happened in the anime before shigure hurt tohru with his “the truth of the zodiacs talk & them accepting & feeling consolance that kyo is doomed”talk.

-Gets whats my biggest surprise after reading this chapter ?????????

Shigure is consistent!! He isnt a rabbit hopping here & there. The dog is loyal & is tired for good reason! Him being depressed & his weird talk with thoru makes so much sense given the manga’s order.

Kyo is consistent!! In the anime, momiji surprise him with confession he loves tohru & challenge him, then kyo la~la~la~joins them downstairs for curry. Not a single expression on his face, where is the expression? it will appear when the plot is forced to address it: by the end of the ep when momiji face hin again. Then we get kyo’s reaction.

I need someone to tell the anime that actions require a reaction. You can refrain from showing a certain reaction if you can’t address it now, but you can’t erase it, negate it, then make it appear when have to!!!! couldn’t they make kyo refuse to join them & eat together? the other characters wont be surprised they think he’s needlessly moody. The audience will know that kyo is troubled with momiji’s challenged & it will excite them!!! having kyo just go eat & watch the momiji/hiro/haru/yuki comedy skit is weird.

The manga’s author wanted kyo to join the dinner, like the anime did. but huge difference. the author actually cares for logic reaction & understands that the audience aren’t dumb little kids that will sit & wait for kyo’s turn to...react! nope! she did this: (a) & (b) below.

-Lost Small Bits/ Panels from the chapter.. But Sadly Big Huge Chunks for Characters buildup & Growth:

(a) addressed the fact the hiro noticed kyoru is in love & dressed that shigure was right!! the cat being in love is a weird concept to the zodiacs! hiro reacted naturally & the author used hiro to flesh yuki’s (the rat), momiji’s (the rabbit) & haru’s (the cow) decision to silently watch the kyo (the cat) makes his own decisions to live!!! They won’t interfere or tell akito or remind him of his state as the doomed caged cat. So sad this moment is cut from yuki. Why must yuki only interact with kyo to beat him (all seasons)? why must yuki only think of kyo to envy him (all seasons) ? Here, yuki’s growth towards kyo as a person & his relationship with tohru is 1000 times better than all tohru is my mom’s sh!t & I envy kyo’s Sh!t we saw in the anime over & over till we memorized it.

(b) kyo didnt just go la~la~eat with momiji after knowing he loves tohru. Nope, there’s small bits missing: called logical emotional reaction. He was surprised he’s caught pining over tohru! cuz yuki, the audience representative, has told us in the previous chapter that ppl in love dont notice anything around them. Kyo thinks him being cold hid his feelings. the dummy’s feelings are as bright as the sun in the Sahara, tohru too. a child read her! such small thing that wont take much space from the ep but was cut cuz kyo only needs to be responsive at the ep’s end. & this scene of kyo & tohru looking awkwardly at each other is minor in space but so important cuz kyo is determined to let go but his decision is challenged by not only momiji, but his natural attraction to tohru. Here he knows he’s caught & exposed... here he knows momiji is a better choice for tohru cuz he wont didn’t hurt her mom... here he knows that even yuki is better cuz never had to pretend to be cold to her... here he knows the world is better than him... & here he just cant help by smile & walks towards her... T_T ... another lesson in writing slow burns by Takaya-san.

-Why would the anime team pass on this?? drawing kyoru closer after the epic tear in Cinderella ep, cuz they want empty suspense~! The anime team thinks that if kyo & tohru stand next to each other, then it means all their issues are solved & the audience are so stupid as to forget tohru’s mom, kyo’s imprisonment, kyo not confessing his sins to tohru & tohru’s need to make a choice wether to fogive hom or not.. nope! you see, they think, ppl who read mangas are smart, so the author can give this epic symbolism & pp would still be not sure kyoru is end game & tohru will forgive him or kyo even fogive himself, but ppl who watch, oh no, gotta cut all the plot worthy content, produce a graduation song for a minor character, cut all kyo/tohru interaction cuz it only means romance & not at all character depth & oh if we show yuki actually formulating deep thoughts that aren’t centered around him, the audience might forget his se02 struggles! or that might ruin yuki’s upcoming growth moment in the finale where he .. you guessed it hits kyo.. as he always do & sulk & think abt himself cuz yuki can only do monologues when he’s directly involved.... man~it is so sad how the anime is dumped down.. Who is the target audience again? not kids as young as hiro cuz even hiro is smart!

-just look:

Momiji talks abt kyo shouldn't give up loving tohru & the authr shows this this ghost!!! his mom! The author reminds us that kyo isnt da~~~~ forgetting anything. He’s a deeply troubled soul & hos mom wants him locked cuz she too was locked in a cage & thinks that’s safer...why oh why you dump ur own story! sh!t~

Side Notes:

I like the closeups on Kisa’s face as she interacted with kyo. It’s very rare for kisa to have a world beside the endearing parental/big protective bro/big doting sister love she has with tohru & haru & off course the romantic love with hiro which was perhaps since their birth or sth. lol. Kisa & kyo arent much on the brotherly side as they rarely interact, but its one of those refreshing interactions she has that helps cast a new light on her as tiny as it is, but its sth out of the norm around her. She sees him around tohru & gets to perceive his true unprovoked character. “He is nice guy”.

I really wanted to punch kureno this chapter.. like Shigure is a jerk shitty dog for sleeping with akito’s mom but kureno... dude.. you submissively sleep with the guy’s eternal love interest & still walks in on him talking to her!!! lol. you’re mentally, emotionally & physically weaker than him & yet, she puts you on her bed, not him & you, tho not wanting her at all, dont walk away. No wonder shigure is defeated & wishing for someone like tohru, lol! Even if shigure met an older tohru-like person, it wont work. shigure deserve someone like him mean, schemer & loves playing power games. Tohru is someone who values honesty & commutation, not saying she’s an angel on earth, but tohru knows who suits her.. except fate is saying: NO. .... currently. lol.

I know kureno’s weakness is part of his character & I love that such characters exits. There are ppl ike that in real life. It’s just this chapter, I felt shigure’s frustration. XD

Yuki in this ep is the best yuki. no exaggeration here, I love when yuki is calmly thoughtful of others & here its kyo of all ppl !!!! cutting this scene is sad.. without it, kyo & yuki remain a cat & rat in the anime. Only ever thinking abt each other thro envious binoculars or hateful words or yuki giving kyo comedic hitting or life’s problem-solving hitting. Why can’t anime yuki be interactive outside his self-centered issues is beyond me.

Momiji & kyo’s interactions are always the best! whether comedy or drama.

I hated the curry cooking scene in the anime... so weirdly out of the ep’s flow.. very forced comedy... in the manga it had a purpose! not just quick add comedy cuz next shot momiji curse breaks & drama & we’ll close the ep with tears & sadness & glimpses of hope...

I love haru’s answer to hiro... so him.. “a guy can’t fall in love?”so chill.. so..simple.

#Fruits Basket #Anime Only #manga spoilers #fruits basket manga #manga review #sad paper #mad paper #I'm having shitty personal day dont mind me #sorry for extra anger #if it sounds like I;m screaming or shouting #I'm not i swear #I really love the anime & se03 is the best content among the other seasons #its just have big giant issues in plot & characters....

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jeankirstein4ever · 3 years

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hihi i hope you're doing well! can i get a matchup the gender doesnt really matter. i use he/they prns btw.

personality categories (idk what to call them) scorpio, intp 5w4, chaotic neutral, and my hogwarts house is slytherin if that matters.

Im a pretty introverted person and will only talk to ppl that i am friends with, even then if we arent really good friends i still wont talk to you unless you spark conversation because i dont like bothering ppl. My sense of humor is mostly sarcastic and dirty. Im also mean as a joke but, i only am to ppl i know who are comfortable with it bc i dont want ppl to genuinely be hurt by anything i say (making ppl uncomfortable/annoyed is my worst fear ngl). i have random burst of energy which usually makes me rant about literally any topic i can come up with. some bad things about my personality tho is i do have a lot of self doubt. its not that i hate myself i just believe that ill never live up to other ppls expectations. its also hard for me to believe someone actually enjoys my presence.

some of my hobbies are dancing, watching anime, gaming, and watching random science vids that pop up on my youtube recommended.

I look for humor and intelligence in a partner. especially humor because i dont take things seriously unless its something im interested in or its a serious issue. also intelligence because i like ranting about things and getting good feedback and thought provoking responses/questions whether the topic is serious or not, and understanding because i will admit im not the easiest person to be with.

my love language is mostly physical touch

im black, 5'3, have short ear length hair (i keep them it in mini twist), im curvy, have sharper features on my face, and have dark skin

random stuff: my fav music genres are alternative rock, rap, hyper pop, r&b, and kpop. my current favorite song is Pretty little birds by SZA and not allowed by TV girl. i also used to do ballet and i love it so much

Aot Matchups

A/n I love these so much, thank you for your ask

I match you with Levi

Levi and you are an all or nothing relationship, the second you two start dating it's all-consuming and absolutely everything

Levi was never one for affection of any kind let alone physical but when you sat down and talked about the things that made you feel loved he made sure to try and incorporate physical affection even in the smallest forms.

After a little while into your guys relationship when you started getting a bit more comfortable you started giving him little kisses on the forehead which he loved more than anything else in the world.

Before missions he would always pull you aside into his office before hugging your for dear life while muttering sweet nothings in your ear, “I love you, you know that right? You mean the world to me, if anything happens I need you to know that.”

When you got injured on a mission, he lost all self-control, this man is a killing machine on a good day but when he thought you were gone the world deserved to burn. Every titan he came across was slaughtered in a matter of seconds.

On the other hand when he found out you were fine, he fucking broke “I thought you were dead, I-I thought I lost you.”

“Baby, you're never losing me”

PET NAMES, this man will fucking die if you call him “baby” or “honey” he loves it so much.

Levi doesn't like PDA in the slightest but if someone tries to get a little too flirty like Petra (sorry Petra) he will purposely kiss you or wrap his arm around your waist In front of them as long as your comfortable with it.

He loves your dirty jokes, even if they're not the best it'll still earn a grin maybe even a chuckle.

YOUR HAIR, he loves it so much. I can't emphasize how much he loves your hair, it's one of his favorite things about you.

He adores your laugh, the first time her heard it was after his own attempt at a dirty joke causing you to spend a solid five minutes laughing your ass off.

He thought it sounded angelic

Mood board:

Playlist :

Love song - The Cure

This side of paradise - Coyote Theory

Hate Yourself - TV Girl

When Am I Gonna Lose You - Local Natives

Corduroy Dreams - Rex Orange County

July - Sir Chloe

Always Forever - Cults

Sanctuary - Joji

Alrighty Aphrodite - Peach pit

3005 - Childish Gambino

Love Letter :

Darling, I love you. I cant say enough , nor can I ever get tired of you saying the same. You loved me, I am loved. By you of all people, wonderful angelic you. In case I don't get a chance to tell you this, or in case I don't say it before we leave, you're my everything, all I've ever needed or wanted. I plan on marrying you , maybe not right now but soon. There's a ring in my office drawer, I almost proposed last night. I'm worried that I m moving to fast and somehow every time I get worried, you find a way to reassure me that I'm not. Just as I will always do for you. I don't know if you remember this but the first night you stayed in my room you fell asleep muttering "please don't leave me." Darling there is nothing in this world that could separate me from you. I am with you always and forever.

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moidse · 3 years

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Yo sometimes i rly feel like screaming and like i have no one i can talk to about dis 😭😭😭

FuCK!!!!! I feel so damn like sexually repressed and like i get horny from THEE smallest things its STUPId and embarrassing.

Ive been soooOOoo sexually repressed this past year and its driving me up the wall. I should not be this horny by dykes giving me the smallest bit of attention--No, i shouldnt be getting this horny/turned on by these dykes, who like arent even insanely my type, like thats also the gag-- i feel like my body is soooooo desperate that im like 💦👅 at the slightest bit of attention a dyke gives me, even if its just friendly... like im so desperate i feel like im seeing what i want to see...

Im sooo horny to have sex with not my partner its fucked and sad and i need to end things but its hard because we live together and are lives are so intertwined at this point and also i do not have any support here outside of them. I truly didnt realize what i was getting into when i moved here. I thought i would be living with them for only a few months but i quickly realized i couldnt afford to move out and my mental health has been the worst this year because of it/this/feeling trapped and stuck in a situation i no longer want to be in... it quickly turned into, im in this relationship for survival purposes which is no good.

Like, i like them, they are a great person and i want to still be in their life, but i so badly want to be able to flirt and mingle with ppl here. I want to have sex with someone else, anyone else, SoOoOOo bad. Like rly rly bad. So bad that v*** just calling me babe gets me slightly turned on and has me fantasizing about them throwing me against a wall asdffkdklsksis fuuuuck i wanna be fucked bad :( lollllll.

Fuck, its hard out here... damn, what scares me is the unknown... i do not know how to nicely end things when are lives are so interwined and we live togrther and share a car and so much shit like how do i just leave this ??? I def need to make friends here which is what im doing... but it hurts my heart that i feel like i cant tell anyone how i feel... because i dont want judgement but also i need to talk to someone and figure out an exit strategy so i know its possible and i can see a path to leaving this situation... fuck... and i dont even wanna think about how hurt they will be :/ it sucks but im not doing them any favors by being with them and knowing in my heart i don't see a future and i so badly want to be with someone new.

I just feel trapped and like i dont know how to leave this in a good way or like trying to be considerate i guess... how van i break up and hurt them the least??? Which is stupid because they will be hurt no matter what... ugh

.. fuck me...

I feel bad that i dont find them attractive anymore.. i feel shallow... also tho i have always felt we didnt have a sexual spark and i just hate how i got to this place by continously not listening to my gut for years telling me this aint it... and they would try to convince me that things can get better and we can work on it but you cant work on just being incompatible...

It sucks but i do feel like i need to move out and not just down stairs and i know its gonna hurt them but i cant keep this up another year... im dying inside... my spirit is crushed and repressed... i hate it here!!! Lol... but fr i cant do another year of this situation...

Every once in a while i feel like i can do this but i deep down know im just like tolerating them... im not passionate about being with them, i dont feel a spark or butterflies, i dont rly like kissing them or them touching me... like its not hot... im just not into them like that and i feel like i have to perform and i cant 24/7 which is why my mental health has been the worst this year... i cant keep doing this to myself and them... i just... it just sucks and its scary but it will be okay eventually and having friends to rely on during this time will be critical i think...

I should talk to a therapist.. but maybe i could reach out to a few friends and say i need support right now and asking if they are open to texts, or phone calls because i just need someone to talk to soon...

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littlebabycrybtch · 3 years

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ughh i hate starting niche shit that ik ppl will immediately reject without even considering it but. dude ngl the anti tablet thing with kids is becoming so exhausting. like PLEAASE fucking hear me out for a sec. theyre probably watching fucking cocomelon and elmo. bro. theyre learning numbers and shapes dude. why do you think thats harmful. genuinely ask yourself why on earth that would hurt them. children being entertained by childrens media or games literally designed to enrich their young minds is not fuckin bad. it exists for a reason. it is made for them. kid tablets arent the devil lmao.

im sorry but yall know parents like... ARENT legit superheroes and actually do inherently need to leave their child to their own devices from time to time just so they can complete other necessary tasks so they both survive right. you know demonizing every single instance of witnessing a parent taking care of themselves at what you perceive as even the slightest expense of their kid is not just an unattainable unrealistic standard, but just. downright Cruelty. seeing a kid with a tablet for 2 seconds and being like ‘wow i bet their parents make them do that for like 8 hours a day while they just sit there lifelessly :///’ is just... such a WILD leap. like no forreal why is this idea so ingrained. to be frank its this malicious ‘parents are lazy and terrible until proven hero’ mentality which is so fucking needlessly damaging. why do you literally think its automatically evil to let a kid watch educational yt kids in a stroller !! why is a parent expected to be their childs resource literally 24/7 when its obvious they literally cannot bc they have to be their own resource too !! ik sympathetic reasoning towards parents aint ppls strong suits and no you do not have to have your own kids to judge, but damn man yall could at least try to be Educated on raising kids b4 u spread this shit.

‘uu just handing them a tablet and ignoring them is gonna damage them’ my guys, you can give kids Plenty of attention and 1-on-1 time, but theyre autonomous human beings, after a certain point they actually Need to learn to entertain themselves and this happens sooner in life than you think. most infants learn how to self soothe a little by 6 months. sometimes ur kid might Prefer to watch smth than talk to you or w/e, and its honestly not a sign ur neglecting them. its a sign ur raising them with enough care that theyre starting to want to navigate on their own. independent play is Good. its Good for them to learn their own interests and what makes them happy. sometimes kids dont WANT your attention, or cant have it at the moment. or sometimes ur kid doesnt WANT to be at walmart, and they have the right to feel upset theyre somewhere against their will, but ofc u kinda have to buy them food so they live and shit. so distracting them with smth both educational and fun, long enough to get in, do what you need to do, and get out is... is not just ‘okay’, but a perfectly healthy and responsible thing to do in that situation, instead of letting them scream and be upset just to ‘prove’ you’re the boss while you don’t give them anything to cope with besides yourself, like its a good thing for them to not form any personal soothing skills. most parents are not Forcing a tablet on their kid, they offer it as an enriching solution to unavoidable situations where they cant be directly interacting, just like the purpose of any other toy, except this one has a much more engaging interface. and uh, lbr, you can neglect a kid with any method for this. seriously, nagging them to go play outside for 8 hours every time they annoy you can be just as neglectful for them, and make them feel just as ignored and rejected and under stimulated as it could be to leave them with a tablet for that long. and dont even get me Started on special needs kids who might need devices to cope even from a young age bc i just fuckin......... please fucking listen. im not exaggerating or playing devils advocate for fun here. the assumptions abt this are truly miserable.

tldr;;; there are not demons in the computer screens tryna rot childrens brains, ur ass grew up watching bill nye the science guy in classroom settings, ik its hard as hell to recognize flaws in such widely socially ingrained concepts but can you guys..... please just Try to be more understanding and think abt how u treat parents, and tbh how you view kids. its harmful to be so ignorant abt childrens needs and how their minds work. yall kinda act like when ur a parent it becomes a crime to still be a human person or smth like thats reasonable and not an incredibly cruel set up against them, and you act like kids are a one-size-fits-all love robot where its as simple as putting in the universal codes every day to raise them right. theyre literally just people and its a bit more complex than that

#anywayz im p sure ive brought this up b4 and am repeating myself but idc man it destroys me

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magicflowershop · 4 years

Text

one day kitty; Kita version

《inspired by movie A Whisker Away》

✿✿ you wished to be with the person you like and wish granted. whiskers, button nose, tail, four legs and ears on top of the head; you turned into a cat. with this, you are given the opportunity to be with the person you want to express your affections to. but as a cat. and only in one day.

― haikyuu characters x cat!reader imagines!

❀ masterlist ❀

the wheel of names have spoken.

kita was having a good time by himself in his grandmother’s rice fields, feeling the breeze like the precious farm boi he is,,, when he saw a cat sleeping on a wet patch in the middle of the field

gathering concern for the little cat, he brought him home and decided to clean it up

then you woke up

you felt something scrubbing your back when you open your eyes you see a guy aiming a hose at you

you scream bc obv, but that scream translated into a screech leaving your mouth and you see your hand

homie that was a paw

why do u have a paw?????

"stay still, you might hurt yourself”

and why is there a Kita Shinsuke spraying water at you lmao

you see that he’s kinda annoyed that you’re moving so much while he’s trying to clean you up but at the same time you arent sure since he isnt easy to read and that don’t know him too well rip so you let yourself be cleaned for free ig

but yo what the hell??? so you’re a cat now????

you try to remember what happened before all this and how in the world you suddenly turned into a cat and magically wake up in Kita’s place

you dont know the exact location of his place so you have no idea how to get back home from here

Kita pulled the cat closer to him, and wiping the wet fur with a towel as generously as he could that the cat soon found comfort from his gentle caresses

okay maybe you could stay for a while yk huehue

“you’re having fun”

you hear a familiar voice from a mile away, you look back and see a fat, creepy cat standing on two of its hind feet

o wait

you saw that cat last night when you were watching the shooting star outside,,, you thought it’d be cute if you suddenly wished for something so you did then that thing appeared outta nowhere promising you that he can make your wish come true than compared to a stupid star

so he forced the wish outta you

that you wished to be closer to a guy you admired,, and you had a lot of crushes in your school ykyk,,, just that Kita takes the entire cake

“you have until midnight to remain as a cat. be sure to leisurely fulfill your desires, y/n.”

and so he vanished

while knowing full well you’re basically Cinderella now, you take consideration of your leisure time with Kita-sama

do you stay or do you go home first to check on your household

“oh what do we have here?”

Kita’s grandma entered the scene and you think that okay maybe this development is a little too quick since you weren’t ready to face his relatives yet

“i found this cat in the fields. it looked like it could get sick so i cleaned it”

o yea you were a damn cat

also Kita calls you freakin “it”

pennywise who

you chose to stay in Kita’s place bc grandma thought it’d be lovely to let you stay there for a while,, and that you looked like you were starving when you saw the food on the table

thank goodness you were a cat bc jesus were you actually drooling

so you spent time in Kita’s place big deal

but his place isn’t what you’re aimed for no?

“i’m leaving”

Kita says putting on his shoes, ready to leave and he’s wearing casual clothes,, you don’t think he’s going to school for volleyball practice

IS HE GOING ON A DATE????????????

lmao

as if thats actually true cmon Kita doesn’t even hang out with girls that much,,, even though he prolly has a bunch of admirers like the other Inarizaki Vball bois

but what if he swang that wae?

??????????

so you followed him right?

you wanted to find out where he’s headed also that he looked good in casual clothes you just want to keep looking at him like this

Kita went to the grocery store

and apparently he was buying ingredients to make food

ahh

so you begin to think that you were foolish for lowkey gate-keeping him

like sis cmon you’re a cat rn keep your head in the game,, what do you do with those paws of yours that cant even grab his hand and pull him away when he was about to bump into a girl as he was about to grab a bottle of tomato paste

heck you cant even get inside the damn grocery store and walk in between them cause you’re a fcking cat!!!!!!!!

you watch their mouths say sorries to each other

the girl was blushing

hm?

Kita looked worried that he couldve hurt her since the hag was coverin her face

nani k

n̸̢̪̜͚͑́̾́̑̋ á̴̠̜̳͖̼̃͗̚͘͠ͅ n̵̼͙͇̻̹̓͜͜ i̷̥̲̻̪͈̞̙̩͛̾̅̓͝͝͠ ̶̨̡̜̞̟͆̿̈́͜ḵ̶̂̓̀̚ o̶͎͛̋̋̊͋̊̅̈̅ͅ r̶͙̮̱͊̎͠ ę̷̺̪͎͈̗̖̯̣͍͒͊̒͆͂̈́͛́̒̃

you started tapping the glass windows like mad SKSKD

and ofc since you’re a stray animal ppl wont let u get away with absolutely anything so one personnel saw you tapping the windows and shouted at you from inside the store

Kita and the hag saw you and yea that was enough embarrassment for the day, you ran away and let your feet take you wherever

its a bit boring that since its a weekend there’s nothing to do,, you never expected that Kita’s weekends would be this boring too :(

so the creepy cat appeared

“what’s wrong you dont seem to be enjoying yourself anymore”

“turn me back to human i need to finish my homework”

maybe thats not the most liable excuse you have but it is true that you need to finish an assignment

“but i gave you a chance to be with the person you admire, no? is this not enough?”

“yea well its-”

“here you are”

you feel someone pick you up and you see that it was Kita:0he must’ve looked for you since you dont even know where you are

oh my god Kita Shinsuke looked for you ma’am eye- or mayhaps you took the route back to his house without knowing since you were busy staring at him when you were stalking him earlier ye

you watched how he looked at the creepy cat you were talking to and and judged it from head to hind feet lmao Kita

“do you have the same owner as this cat?”

he asked you and you gave out every ounce of your energy to shake your head as a no as well as to let out the most disgusted and disapproval meow you ever could-

“the hell would i want to be acquainted with that thing!”

what

no way did u just speak

so Kita stared at you for the remainder of the time but decided you speaking isnt physically possible and that he could’ve been real tired since he saw the Miya twins along the way

he took you back home since his grandma seemed to be real happy seeing a little animal in the house with them

but you didnt miss to see the little knowing smile from the creepy cat from earlier, you just knew from that alone that he was messing with you since as you said you were bored

it was wrong of you to talk to that lil disgusting thing

since that moment you refused to speak with your mouth every again, if you were going to speak thought you would probably just purposely say meow only to not make anymore mistakes

also you’re spending a lot of time with Kita’s grandma than Kita himself

“i wonder what your future spouse is doing at this moment, Shin-kun”

Kita looked like he wanted to roll his eyes so bad lmao since he always hears things about his grandma wanting to see his wedding before she dies :c

and yk it makes you sad too just hearing about this

and you want to help 😔

and you would offer help 😌

they heard the cat speak and now you’re running away bc they heard you talk about wanting to marry Shinsuke 🤡

the day ended and you managed to go home before the sun set basically nothing happened and your transformation was all for nuttin, you were bamboozled by a demon cat you randomly saw one night

the next day you were back to your human self and it was a school day so ofc you have to live on normally in school as if nothing happened, as if you didnt just stalk a guy from your school but we’ll get to that

see, you’re friends are friends with a few of the guys from your school’s volleyball team,,, so you’re within vicinity of Kita’s attention

when you explicitly did not want to see him atm

BUT THEN YOU REMEMBER YOUR FRIENDS KNOW YOU LIKE KITA

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU DO NOW

you decided to run away but you realize that’s useless bc you’re all going home together :D

now you weren’t the crowds type of person,, you had no idea how it come to this, you’re used to hanging out with your girlfriends yes but they were having fun altogether like this it was fun just watching them goof off and whatnot

“hey”

when i told you you’re almost dropped the second you hear Kita calling to you, you best believe

you said hey but in a different tone of voice bc it was too early for him to notice you had the same voice as the cat he saw yesterday,,, then you both walked in silence

you couldnt take it anymore and decided to go to the nearest convenience store since you had something you want to buy,, you went and whispered this to your friends but when they were asking you to let your voice out, you were deadass croaking

but then you clown yourself sum more bc Kita was concerned of you acting like this and asked if you were alright

now you’re stuck with him in the convenience store bc your friends and his friends thought it’d be a great idea for him to go with you :D

“you should eat something warm before going to sleep, and take a warm bath too”

:((((((

okay now you feel bad for actually making him worry lol

your alibi of getting sick works really well with not speaking at all around him so you used this till the end thinking you can escape him with this until it rained and you dont have an umbrella with you

aight y/n you’re one hell of a clutz

Kita was enough of a gentleman to buy an umbrella for you until its actually out of stock

you guys stayed in the convenience store for the time being

you were losing your mind

how much longer will you stay with him

you thought of an alibi to save you from the embarrassment so you told him you gotta jet and go back to school bc you forgot to bring your notebook with you

but now you realize you realize you didnt have to tell him bc he’ll still follow you as if his life depends on taking care of you :(

after you randomly stormed out of the convenience store, he caught up to you and pulled you somewhere where there’s a roof over

“are you usually this reckless? or do you just like getting yourself sick?”

homie does not hold back

he pulled a spare shirt from his back and put it on your head,, proceeding to wipe your wet hair with it until he realized he’s subconsciously invading your personal space

he looked right at you, so you two were standing there,,, staring,, his hands on both sides of your head,,,,, both of y’all are wet hunni

he let go and turned the other way,,, the darkness wasnt dark enough to conceal his red cheeks and hunni you made him blush aight

“you reminded me of a cat i saw yesterday im sorry about that”

“you dont have to apologize”

o sis you did it now

you s p o k e

so Kita was beyond surprised to hear that voice again,,,, and this time from yOU,, ALL NORMAL,, NO FROGS

“i, i can explain”

he looked at you confused, hell was he so confused, that you sounded exactly like the voice he randomly heard yesterday which made him think that came from the cat,, he didnt think that was physically possible bc yk but the embarrassment from your face was enough for him to guess

“did you really say you’re willing to marry me”

gOD

“i mean,,, i don’t mind”

“grandma would be glad”

stay tuned for more!

#walk in my garden #i always change things up a lil bit lmao #hope you guys are keeping up #haikyuu!!#haikyuu #haikyuu!! drabbles #haikyuu!! smau #haikyuu!! imagines #haikyuu!! headcanons #haikyuu!! x reader #kita #shinsuke kita #kita shinsuke #kita x y/n #kita x reader #inarizaki #one day kitty

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dreamy-stars · 4 years

Text

7/30/20

i’ve never felt this low in a long time, not even in sophomore year of college?? it’s like rly concentrated sadness and rly hit hard within the last month?

- i went through my first breakup, which affected me a lot more than i thought it would. it was so short lived i don’t even want to call it a relationship. i hate to admit it but it hurt so much bc it seemed like he wanted to be with me for a while. he has his reasons and he should take care of himself but i can’t help but feel thrown away without care? i wanted closure and he couldn’t even give me that. my self confidence went down the drain, and i kept questioning if there was something i could have done differently. i even contemplated if i was pretty enough XD can you believe i let a 5’6 man make me feel like this...pathetic...but yeah he rly has no emotional intelligence or something man cmon i wanna talk it out.. - it took me a while to get over him and now i dont miss him specifically, i just miss being wanted and having that connection? anyway my confidence was bad at this point and was feeling insecure in so many ways. maybe 3-4 weeks ago i started going down this dark hole, just questioning my purpose here. i’m not smart, pretty, or talented in any field. i felt kind of useless? just there... (even typing this im like tearing up hehe) comparing myself to ppl again..how i’m not good enough (in eng) just kinda wasting my parents money? and i think about if i were prettier i’d prob be treated better and those around me would pay nore attention to me? brings me to my next point :p - i feel SO lonely. it doesnt help that i went through a break up and the person i was talking to all day every day is suddenly cut from my life. my friends can contact me and stuff but i feel so left out sometimes. it’s not their fault, it’s just how my brain is ig lol. it felt like i was back in high school. i had acquaintances and was surrounded by friends but couldnt rly connect and be close to ppl. what i remeber most was being at the booth and being surrounded by girl friends and not adding to the convo at all. i felt so lonely and insecure i never want to feel that again. recently i felt it with my cousins who i have always felt close to. can u believe? i can’t rly explain it. but when sp brought her friends to the lake i felt ostracized. its so stupid for ne to feel that way, they’re literally strangers and i wish we could be like white folks that introduce each other right at the start of meeting new ppl U KNOW?? idk i’m so fucking sensitive LOL. like at least mai did it with her bf. I Am Nothing. like sp didnt introduce tp so why am i feeling like this. i guess its just me and my deep rooted trauma of being overlooked and forgotten! even when we went to the lake with just our cousins i felt SOOO SOOOOOOOO down and lonely, even more than before. i was sticking near ap bc it was kinda awkward still and i didnt want her to be lonely. i was just floating around and they played games and talked together and stuff and i felt invisible i felt so lonely even with so many ppl i love there. it didn’t help that they had sleepovers and hung out together so ich and never asked me. they even planned to sleepover later that night and didnt ask me. i wonder if it was bc i was neutral and stuck with ap? oh yeah i forgot that i couldnt go eat with them bc there was no room for me which is understandable but i still felt shitty and i think i cried that night :p it’s small insignificant things that build up for me and make me feel like an afterthought. it rly fueled my self confidence issue. AGAIN no one did anything wrong i’ve just been very sensitive and analytical of everything lately. it’s kind of led me to being distant with sp kinda like im testing her and seeing if she would reach out to me at all? its petty but i feel like she hates me fr 😂 might just be me. I Am Nothing...

ANYWAY ive been crying like pretty often just having these thoughts eat me up. it’s better now i think? it’s scary to admit but i’ve thought about dying so many times recently and i hate it. almost like it’s normalized to me now. it’s not that i would ever attempt but i understand what ppl mean when they want to disappear? i’m very blessed with loving parents and a healthy able body and a good living situation. i never want to put my parents and family through something that traumatizing. i haven’t properly expressed these feelings to anyone besides one watered down text to darwin. it was hard to even type the text, i ended up crying in the bathroom. i’ll have bad days and the thoughts creep up on me and i try to distract myself by watching stuff and it helps. i’ve been working out and dieting and i feel a lot better about myself and more positive. i’ve thought about therapy seriously but im hesitant still. if i still have issues i will, but talking through a screen and the risk of others hearing kinda turns me off. just processing my feelings and thinking about them extensively has helped me a bit but i think having a professional tell me about my feelings will make me feel better. idk how to bring it up at all, and i feel like my issues arent serious enough? but my brain been going cwazy :3

i’ve been having a rough time at home just doing a lot of nothing but being sad and working out.. i hope with school starting soon i can get out the house and be productive again! recently ive been dealing with the problem of “living for others” i notice that i care about the comfort of others and how i can satisfy them and appeal to others at my expense.. i’ve been thinking about how im not good enough for this type of guy to like me LIKE WHO AMMM IIII WHY DO I CARE...WEIRDO..... maybe im dragging myself too hard i dont think i do this much but i do be a nice comfy doormat for others :)

but overall i feel better than a few weeks ago i think! idk what that was about why is my brain like this....making irrational thoughts and hurting my own feelings...idk but it will be okay :)

#diary

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p-st · 5 years

Text

sakura haruno fics (ao3)

an old anon sent me on the quest of a lifetime when they first asked for sakura fic recs and my brain went “lets read every fic on ao3 in the sakura haruno tag” (also ff.net but thats gonna have to be another post in the far off future bc ff is an old giant)

fics are split into finished, in progress, and abandoned (and the fics with ⭐ are my top faves) plus every category’s fics will be in order from shortest to longest. im gonna include the original summaries along with my own separate take (really more of a reaction) and any warnings the fics need!

THIS IS A LABOR OF LOVE!!!!! which is a nice way of saying it’s long as shit, it took me forever, and i loved every second of it! let me know if any links dont work, theres typos that dont look purposeful, there’s warnings missing, if any fics arent in order, the formatting isnt right, etc.etc.

my sincerest apologies to mobile users

fair warning: im not exaggerating when i say it’s really long

(pic from naruto-manga-caps)

author’s note: im dumb and have adhd and though ive read most of these fics at least twice, i tend to skip over text. with this in mind PLEASE let me know if you come across anything in these fics that makes you uncomfy so i can either add a warning or remove it entirely

want to navigate faster? ctrl+f to search key words like: [ship], [author], bamf, mokuton, (team as) family, etc!

FINISHED

in the roots of the forest (i am birthed) by frostnesia

ship: none // words: 272 // chapters: 1/1

so little sakura walks; past the flowers, the vines, the bright red gates and enters to a sanctuary no one with a beating heart had stepped in for more than a hundred years.

au. little ficlet! OOF im always a little heart eyed about godly iconography. plotless! just a good short read that would absolutely rock my world if it was expanded into a multichapter story but it’s still good as is!

Seven or Two by grit

ship: sakura & kakashi // words: 623 // chapters: 1/1

He makes a split-second decision. Their teamwork was atrocious, but he knows who to blame, and it’s not the girl who blackmailed her teammates into giving a damn.

i really do need more fics where kakashi recognizes the similarities between himself and sakura. tbh i just need more fics where sakura gets the love and recognition she deserves. this is a good short fic for that! team seven doesnt make it through but sakura does! eventually! warning for one weird line abt the yamanakas that might make ppl uncomfy

Twelve and Sixteen by therebaeka

ship: none // words: 625 // chapters: 1/1

Twelve years old Sakura was weak. She was annoying. She cried over the littlest thing. She had no pain tolerance at all. She wanted to be strong. Sixteen years old Sakura was strong. She can split the earth. She can heal anything. She can take anything thrown at her. She wanted to be twelve again.

god i love fics that touch on all the negative effects a shinobi lifestyle has on ninja kids (like the loss of childhood innocence/wonderment). character growth and mostly a character analysis type fic which i love. sakura just loves her team but she misses being a kid (team as family!!)

Three Sentence Ficlets by Elizabeth Culmer (edenfalling)

ship: narusasusaku // words: 626 // chapters: 3/3

Tiny ficlets written for various iterations of the Three Sentence Ficathon:

1) A quiet moment, after the world doesn't end. 2) Sakura reaches the valley's rim just in time. 3) The night before Naruto's investiture as Hokage.

soft and kind short fics abt my fav ot3. first chap is set post-war, 2nd is set during naruto and sasukes fight in the valley before he goes to orochimaru, and the setting of the 3rd is in the above description. these are really soft fics and im a sucker for the slice of life feelings

Another Kind of You by rhenna

ship: sasusaku // words: 655 // chapters: 1/1

"The problem with the color black is that it can't decide whether it is the color of the classically evil or the color of the bad-boy hero."

they are.. just liddle babies..team as family feelings bc that’s what really gets me in my uwus. not shippy! just sakura’s usual baby crush! surprisingly introspective

Unravel by grit

ship: none // words: 683 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura will be a shinobi soon and they know to coat their bare skin in poison.

au. sakura is a kiri nin amidst the bloodline purges. honestly just a super interesting look into life in kirigakure during this time and how its beliefs reflect on its children. warning for animal death and a little bit of an unhinged world view

I’ll Carry You by naru_writes

ship: narusasusaku // words: 701 // chapters 1/1

I’ll just rest my eyes for a bit, Sakura tells herself, slowly petting the now sleeping kitten, and then I’ll start on dinner.

i LIVE for domestic fluff and established relationships aaa. they love and care about her so much it makes my heart happy. all from sakura’s pov

Puppy Love by Dovey

ship: kibasaku // words: 852 // chapters: 1/1

It’s Sakura’s first day in the academy when she falls in love with Kiba Inuzuka.

i looooove how differently she grows as a character with just one difference. really cute baby genin crush. theyre rowdy, muddy, rough housing best friends. really short and lighthearted

Selfless Stunt by Michinokao

ship: sakura & naruto & sasuke // words: 859 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura wants to become chunin. She really does. However, after seeing Naruto’s nervousness, she decides to raise her hand to drop out with her team.

set during chunin exams. OOF babey im always here for team 7 as family fics!! short little thing and just feel good for ppl who stan sakura and love when others take her feelings into consideration :’)

What You See is What You Get, So Look Away by Dovey

ship: none // words: 903 // chapters: 1/1

a warmup piece i wrote trying to make a Kakashi who’s not so oblivious.

kakashi’s pov. lots of introspection and meta and i love this kind of stuff a lot. analysis on how different naruto and sasuke are from the rest of their team. love love love when anyone brings up sakura’s own mortality and what she had to do to get to where she is. aaa also the author notes at the end are very worth the read

Snake Tooth by Pinnacle of Failure (Cromirn)

ship: none // words: 904 // chapters: 1/1

The Forest of Death doesn't go right. Sakura can't tell what's real and what's not.

exactly as the summary says! orochimaru does some genjutsu stuff and my poor girl get severely messed up mentally. warning for implications of gore and an unstable mind. part one in a trilogy (others are on this list)

Here Are Your Bones Crossed by grit

ship: none // words: 977 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura begins recovery by unfurling her hands and giving him a tense report. Kakashi waits patiently for her to stumble through Konoha Standard, motions well-memorised but never practiced, and gently reaches out to lift her chin, making her look at him.

(Sakura blames herself. For trusting Kabuto, for not being stronger, for being here when really it should have been Naruto who survived.)

it’s fucked :( sakura is gonna need such a good therapist it’s really what she deserves. and if i did tear up a little after that last thing kakashi said? well thats between me and whoever’s reading this. read the author notes at the end for an explanation of whats going on in this timeline

Wind and Water, Earth and Rain by theformerone

ship: narusaku // words: 1020 // chapters: 1/1

Naruto almost loses himself on the Wave Mission. But in a world where Team Seven was created to prevent another Kyuubi attack, there is always someone there to remind him of who he is.

set during wave arc. MOKUTON SAKURA. not shippy at all? incredibly easy to take as platonic and just a sweet team 7 as family fic (which i did before i looked at the tags??) warning for super brief gore

⭐How Do You Tell a Girl You Want to Kiss Her? by theformerone

ship: shikasaku // words: 1084 // chapters: 1/1

Shikamaru punches a hole through Sakura’s wall. She can’t really deal with that until she has her morning coffee.

au. part three of the role reversal au (others are listed later) this is really cute and theres nothing life or death about it and i love how idk. normal it is? sakura is just tired and taking it in stride and shikamaru is a flustered mess (choji is a good wingman) (and god this is a small thing but i love the lowkey team 7 stuff. my faves are my faves in any universe)

Of Gardens and Girls by Dovey

ship: sakura & team 7 // words: 1128 // chapters: 1/1

Soulmates: a person so important, so loved, and so central to your life that the universe acknowledges it. Flowers representing that love will grow inside of you until the love is requited, or you move on.

Sakura has a lot of soulmates.

au. set throughout timeline. really bittersweet, so damn bittersweet. this fic makes my heart hurt bc she’s so full of love and deserves better. (theres also a lot more ships nd every single one is platonic except for the naruhinagaa) warning for death :’(

Forgetting Something by theformerone

ship: sakukarin // words: 1130 // chapters: 1/1

Well I’m not eating you out in the kitchen like I was planning on when your daughter left.”

Sakura snorts.

“So she’s just my daughter now?”

Karin follows her into the room and sets down Sarada’s new spare pair of glasses on her desk.

“When you help her cause minor property damage before seven in the morning, yes, she’s your daughter.”

set in boruto universe. really fucking sweet. this is just a short and cute little slice of life thing w adorable sakura and sarada interactions

Smiles in Spring by Kalira

ship: inosaku // words: 1179 // chapters: 1/1

One spring day when they are very small, Ino meets a little girl with shy eyes, a beautiful smile, and pink hair, and immediately knows what she wants in her future. Ino's never had any qualms bending the force of her will on the universe to be sure she gets whatever she wants.

NOT sakura centric but i excused a couple of other fics already PLUS this is cute so whatever. it’s just short and cute and makes my heart swell

Drawing Her Back by Kalira

ship: inosaku // words: 1197 // chapters: 1/1

It's not the first time Sakura has had to lead her lover back to herself from deep in her own mind, and it probably won't be the last. She doesn't like it . . . but she can do it.

sakura is the best. have i mentioned that before? i love her more than anything if you didnt already know that about me. sakura is just making sure ino is okay and helping in any way she can and my heart is soft

Underneath the Underneath (is nothing but bones and blood) by Dovey

ship: none // words: 1269 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura has a weak heart. This isn’t metaphorical, but literal- she’s born with a heart too small to pump properly. A valve is slightly misaligned, and any strenuous activity could kill her.

set from genin era to the attack on the village amidst the chunin exam. and again! dovey delivers the good stuff! no dialogue. life kinda comes at her fast and you can almost feel her whole mindset shift

Nothing but Paint by grit

ship: none // words: 1382 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura has her hand fist-deep in Sasuke's rib cage, seriously tempted to rip his heart out like he did hers, a conflict of interest mitigated only by the code of honor her shishou drilled into her, when she realizes that Team Seven won't return to Konoha without him this time.

character exploration of team 7 surrounding sakura (my weakness) not sure where in the timeline this is but i know it's post sai and yamato joining the team. it's short but interesting as hell!! immediate warning for blood if the desc didnt give it away

Hands Reaching Out by orlha

ship: shikasaku // words: 1412 // chapters: 1/1

The price of winning the war was steeper than Sakura imagined it to be. It was a price she gladly pay over and over again but the thought of not living long enough to see this new peace burns in her chest.

post war. just a short angsty little thing abt sakura and her seal. mentions of death

Canary Bill by Pinnacle of Failure (Cromirn)

ship: none // words: 1474 // chapters: 1/1

she knows that what they did for her will come back around. she didn't expect it to be this way.

part two of the disjointed realities series! still set during the exams and my poor girl still has some residual effects of the genjutsu orochimaru put her through. it’s not clear whether it’s real or not

From Ashes by Dovey

ship: none // words: 1476 // chapters: 2/2

She hasn’t got a family, hasn’t got a team, not in any way either of those words should count. It’s time to come to terms with that.

set near the beginning of shippuden it seems? interesting implications about her family that i want more of plus emphasis on team 7 as family minus her which hurts my heart aa. warning for death, blood, and gore (not super graphic)

Boar Tusk by Pinnacle of Failure (Cromirn)

ship: none // words: 1499 // chapters: 1/1

she burns in the flames of memories of which are fake, they boil her skin and melt flesh and she is nothing more than a skeleton of what she was. she wishes she were not what she is now, what she was then, and she begs.

last part of the disjointed realities series! still during the exams! yeah she’s definitely traumatized, no question about it.

How Lame by theformerone

ship: shikasaku // words: 1527 // chapters: 1/1

Nara Shikamaru is the Godaime’s apprentice. Sakura thinks he’s a world class nag.

au. ROLE REVERSALS!! super interesting!!!!! teams are still the same but their stories and personalities are different? anyway this au is cute and i love team seven’s relationship and also sakura’s skills are cool as SHIT. plus the shikasaku interactions are cute. part one of this role swap series.

Letters to the Front by Kalira

ship: hinasaku // words: 1644 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura, as both head medic and close friend and advisor to the Hokage, is not lacking for news from back home even as she manages the field hospital at the front lines, but her most prized letters are not those advising her of news on the war and politics.

set during war time. sakura just loves and appreciates her girlfriend so much aa warning for implied nsf/w. none of it graphic!

The One With the Eye Thing by Dovey

ship: none // words: 1776 // chapters: 1/1

a one chapter story that’s 100% just sakura getting a very gross revenge on her sensei and on the shinobi class system as a whole, at least as far as SHE sees it.

that also means this is SUPER gorey. let it be said that i give the people what they want

au. bamf sakura! set pre shippuden surprisingly enough. believe it or not, there is a very gorey eye thing. sexy ass takes on the role of civilians in a shinobi village. warnings for graphic gore and a mental breakdown

I Spy by AshesFall (Cloud_Nine)

ship: none // words: 1782 // chapters: 1/1

Team 7, Missing in Action.

The aftermath of the Wave Mission gone wrong.

part one of the Lucky Sevens series. not very sakura centric but the whole series is just neat! team as family which im always a sucker for. the series focuses on how team 7 copes with being back in the village and i just think it’s neat idk! warning for mentions torture! individual warnings for every other fic in the series in the tags but most are about torture, trauma, and general violence

Ghosts in Her Blood by Dovey

ship: gaasaku // words: 1831 // chapters: 1/1

After Wave, Inner Sakura changes into a familar face to help Sakura cope with her new reality

au. set during chunin arc. tbh!! no idea this was a ship fic til i read the tags so this can absolutely be read as a shipless fic. really makes you think abt how (not) good a shinobi village is at teaching children how to compartmentalize. my girl’s a bamf but traumatized and trying. warnings for gore and death

Coming Home by Angelchexmex

ship: sakura & team 7 // words: 1901 // chapters: 1/1

Kakashi isn't surprised that his little brats had made themselves at home in his apartment while he was gone, he was just a bit curious as to why.

kakashi pov! set early genin days! not much plot wise but i love fics like that so much aa i love fics that just showcase the familiarity between team 7 in more domestic settings. they love sakura!! they all care abt her so much and kakashi love his kids a lot!!! really cute short and sweet team as family fic! warning for implications of abuse and starvation

Does He Make You Feel Special? by Dovey

ship: none // words: 1905 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura develops an eating disorder, and then she recovers with help from some friends.

au. starts pre shippuden. read the tags because this realy is what it says on the tin. warnings for eating disorders, self esteem issues, and relapse. she gets mostly adopted by tsunade and everyone takes care of her in general. hinata gets the place of apprentice and sakura gets more friends and support and gets trained by anko! focuses on recovery before plot so the only “real” plot is at the very end

Ink Stains and Cherry Blossoms by Hannahmayski

ship: sai & sakura // words: 1922 // chapters: 1/1

Ice cream doesn’t solve all of the world’s problems but Sakura is pretty sure it solves most of them.

Sai’s having a bad day and has never had ice cream before. Sakura fixes both.

sai centric fic w sunshine sakura. budding friendship. can be interpreted as romantic if you want? i didnt see it as that, but if it’s what u want! delves a little into sai’s feelings towards danzo. just dang cute and i always love a sakura who is there for her friends. allusion to an eating disorder and emotional manipulation.

⭐What Lingers by spacefleeting

ship: none // words: 1994 // chapters: 1/1

For someone who just watched her friend get beaten to a pulp, had her head nearly punched in, and stopped her teammate from going on a curse-induced murder spree, Sakura is handling everything very well. Until she’s not.

(Or: Sakura blossomed and she’s not really sure how she feels about it yet)

set during chunin exam. trying and failing to compartmentalize and naruto trying to help as best as another kid can. it’s endearing but wow, does canon naruto ever touch on how they help get children through the trauma of shinobi life?? the answer is no. mentions of blood. she takes a bite out of a dude. like. real shit

What’s Yours is Mine by DefiantDreams

ship: narusasusaku // words: 1994 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura doesn’t quite know how it happens, but suddenly their closets are a free-for-all for each other.

au. sakuras pov. just plain soft. short and cute budding romance between my faves aaa,, also genderfluid naruto!!

Last Match in the Matchbox by Endoplasmic Panda

ship: none // words: 2071 // chapters: 1/1

In which Sakura Haruno realizes that being discontent with adult life is part of the Team Seven contractual fine print.

(got rid of the rest of the summary bc it was too many text blocks) set during boruto! just some build up to sakura FINALLY getting her own time to just travel aa. everyone supports her and that’s how it should be

How a Fire is Born by ThroughtheMirrorDarkly

ship: none // words: 2075 // chapters: 1/1

What if there had been no Ino that fateful day in the park? What if Sakura is mercilessly bullied until one day she is pushed to her breaking point, with surprising results?

starts off during early academy days. sakura came here to learn and fuck people up and she just finished the curriculum. i HATE hiruzen but i love my girl so :/ also team seven are all rivals which sounds like it would be chaotic poor kakashi. warnings for abuse and bullying

How Sakura Discovers Her Love for Fighting by smolwhite_ugly

ship: none // words: 2087 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura Haruno is five-years-old when she decides that she really wants to become a ninja. Not a paper ninja. A shinobi.

set during early academy days uvu. rowdy girl rights!!!!! sakura is the ride or die friend everyone wishes they had. sakura is that short comic “you have befriended [name], [name] will now die for you” except it’s beat someone up. sakura’s best friends are blondes uwu

What a Pain by theforemerone

ship: shikasaku // words: 2269 // chapters: 1/1

Yamanaka Ino is an S-ranked missing nin. But before that, she was Shikamaru and Chouji’s best friend and comrade.

Sakura has an easier time compartmentalizing than they do. Especially in a fight.

au. second part of the role swap au! ino essentially took the place of sasuke. pretty focused on the ino-shika-cho story but entirely from sakura’s pov. shes so FUCKING COOL I LOVE THE JUTSUS OP GAVE HER SHES SUCH A BAMF IM IN LOVE. this au is so interesting i need more

Galvanize by nerazenn

ship: narusaku // words: 2352 // chapters: 1/1

gal·va·nize (v): shock or excite (someone), typically into taking action.

Sakura’s victorious wail was cut short, however, as she became immediately aware of two things.

One, her hand was in a lot of pain.

And two, Ino was nowhere near Sakura.

modern au. just a short meet cute fic sjcndek honestly id expect nothing less. it’s just cute and makes me laugh. something not serious thrown into the mix of recs

Truth in Platitudes by Kalira

ship: narusasusaku // words: 2454 // chapters: 1/1

Naruto stepped in with no thought to his own safety to protect theirs; now Sakura and Sasuke are left to try and get him out of the trap in his own mind.

yeah it’s exactly what it says on the tin. not sure where on the timeline this is. THEY LOVE EACH OTHER!!!!! im really so easy please

And Then the Desert Blooms by spacefleeting

ship: sakura & gaara // words: 2457 // chapters: 1/1

Haruno Sakura meets Gaara of the Desert piece by piece, name by name.

set throughout timeline. mostly sakura’s thoughts during the few times she’s interacted with gaara. development as friends! naruto would be so happy

Little Moments by iBloo

ship: sasusaku // words: 2519 // chapters: 1/1

Sasuke, Sakura, and Sarada enjoy an afternoon shopping and spending time with each other.

set during boruto’s dad’s son’s time. sasuke just loves his girls and sakura loves her family and sarada loves her parents so much and loves to spend time with them together. just a nice little slice of life feel good fic. im a sucker for domestic “filler episode” type fics aa they make me so tender

Bumpy Future by Dovey

ship: hinasaku // words: 2553 // chapters: 1/1

It’s her last year at the academy when Sakura hits her head. When she wakes up, she has a little trouble matching memories to the people in them- but she’ll have to get it right eventually, yeah?

in which sakura pairs vague associations with the wrong people, and everyone is much happier because of it (Except Iruka-sensei).

acadamy days!! newborns!!! everything changes djsbjd ino is her rival, kiba’s her bestfriend, and hinata is her crush and her class supports all of it, it’s cute (also read the author notes at the end, the last paragraph is so fucking quality)

Hello, Bright Eyes (been waiting on you) by mouseymightymarvellous

ship: saisaku // words: 2651 // chapters: 1/1

“look underneath the underneath,” except no one has ever really bothered to look at sakura and see her. and then there is a boy (isn’t there always). maybe they’re both just ghosts, making each other real.

no clear timeline. large focus on sakura and how she’s (not) seen by other people. emphasis on sai and sakura’s disconnect from naruto and sasuke. the plot confused me a bit but im pretty positive it’s about sakura dismantling root per request of tsunade. THE ENDING THOUGH??? sai deserves so much love that really made me melt a little

Prodigal Sons by Fiction_Over_Fact

ship: sakura & team 7 // words: 2779 // chapters: 1/1

Sasuke is gone and Naruto is gone and Kakashi might as well be.

In which Sakura is sad and alone but discovers she doesn’t have to be either.

set after naruto leaves with jiraiya. sort of a character analysis/coming of age type fic. touches on the disparity of who she was and who she’s becoming. also has bits of her friendship with the rest of the rookie 9!

Sasuke Discovers Emotion #4 by Dovey

ship: sasusaku // words: 2852 // chapters: 1/1

In which Sasuke manages to avoid getting a team with any fangirls, and then figures out maybe he was secretly the fangirl all along, because a little distance and the influence of Sensei Tenten helps Sakura flourish and now he’s got a big old crush to deal with on top of everything else.

set during genin days. also sasuke centric but sakura gets put into a different team and her development as a result is so beautiful even though it isnt the focus aaa. sasuke pines and it’s cute!!

⭐An Improper Apology Properly Backfires by rex101111

ship: sasusaku // words: 2996 // chapters: 1/1

Sasuke Uchiha apologizes, or at least makes an attempt. Sakura thinks he could do better than THAT.

set at the end of the war. naruto is the innocent bystander and it’s all in his pov. god i WISH this went down in canon. this fic is so fucking funny and cathartic bc sakura finally gets to air her grievances. DEFINITELY a top fave of mine and i have it bookmarked for whenever i just so happen to be in the mood

The Value of Learning to Bloom by Yourself by alunbalanced

ship: shikasaku // words: 3001 // chapters: 2/2

Sasuke asks a question and receives an unexpected answer and Sakura stands on her own two feet as she walks away.

set post war. really good self indulgent fic for ppl who love sakura and arent the biggest fans of sasuke (this fic is a bit mean to him so i wouldnt recommend to sasuke stans). this doesnt read as one consecutive fic but more like two individual one shots. sasuke is only in the first chapter and the second one is dedicated to sakura’s first time training w tsunade and shikamaru analyzing her. also the author notes are me always

San by Demeter

ship: none // words: 3046 // chapters: 1/1

When three whittles down to one. A very biased view.

set throughout pre shippuden timeline. heavy on that introspection! not all that plot focused, just sakura’s thoughts on where she stands and how she’s always left behind

The Shadows are Darker When the Sun is Bright by EndoplasmicPanda

ship: none // words: 3437 // chapters: 1/1

She remembers that Team 7, from all those years ago, and then remembers the real Team 7, with bickering teammates and bloody spars and careful, loving admonishment. She remembers the Team 7 without Sasuke, remembers the Team 7 where it was just her and Kakashi for three long years. Remembers Sai and Yamato, sets aside her guilt for not visiting them in far too long, remembers Naruto’s grin and Sasuke’s smile.

They loved her. She loved them.

Can she love herself?

set after the war. sakura becomes hokage and shes good even though shes traumatized and not moving past it (bc shes trying to live the lives her teammates shouldve had) open ending but i choose to believe she takes to wandering the lands and going back into medical things while learning how to live her own life for herself and no one else :’)

Sense Memory by KuriQuinn

ship: sasusaku // word count: 3501 // chapters: 1/1

She’s not breathing, or showing any signs of life, and that worries him.

takes place when sarada is a baby. almost all of it is a flashback to smthn that took place in their baby days and it’s all in sasuke’s pov. the non flashback bits are soft and slice of life-esque. warnings for near death and drowning in the flashback and implied ns/fw near the very beginning and the very end

Coming Undone by Dovey

ship: none // words: 3643 // chapters: 1/1

The Uchiha Massacre is world-famous within weeks. The homicide of the Haruno family, in comparison, is a barely a blip on the radar- another case of personal drama with an unfortunate end. Sakura, the only survivor of her family tragedy, tries to grow up normal, chasing after boys and running away from nightmares.

She doesn’t grow up normal.

au. she’s a bamf with trauma babey!! she uses battle axes and hammers and her summons are tigers which is cool as shit. loss of morality and unquestionable loyalty is always so interesting. warnings for gore, death, and drug use

Sakura’s Plants by ba262

ship: none // words: 3704 // chapters: 15/15 // updated: 3/8/19

Sakura was given Ukki-kun the day she was officially left behind by team 7

set throughout timeline. a story told in parts surrounding the plants in sakura’s life. no dialogue! i love sakura so much and my heart hurtsss,, we get to see more of her reaction to being left behind by her team and im in PAIN!! shout out to sakura’s newfound support group. short chapters and a nice short read! idk how to describe it but the writing flows REALLY nicely

Pinpoint by CountessCzan

ship: sakura & shisui // words: 3792 // chapters: 1/1

Shisui takes care of a child named Sakura for a mission once. Sakura never lets go of him after that.

set when shisui is a genin post-war. sakura is a cute little baby and im sobbing at the picture this fic paints. I LOVE SHISUI A LOT he’s so soft im really tender

Stars Exploding by blesseth

ship: sasusaku // words: 4098 // chapters: 1/1

Don’t get Sakura wrong, she was happy she and Sasuke were becoming friends, following everything that had happened. Ecstatic even. But hell, did he have to be on her mind all the damn time?

set post war. BYE i had the cheesiest grin the entire time i was reading this. just a cute little pre-relationship type fic and i love the little team 7 as family things sprinkled in. just another good light hearted fic to break up the serious/plot focused fics

Sharkman and Cherrygirl by The_Floating_World

ship: none // words: 4245 // chapters: 1/1

Newly five Haruno Sakura joins her parents on a merchant trip, has a life-changing encounter, and gains a new goal.

YES BABEY!!! i love my little fearless to the point of just plain idiotic girl!! there’s a surprising amount of fics where kisame becomes a bit of an inspiration to my number one fave and i love all of them! more fuel for my love of sakura who focuses more towards her water aspect// anyway! my little baby is just in desperate need for a mentor figure/someone she can base herself off of bc shes a shy little things whom i love more than life itsself aa GOD the way she gets absolutely star eyed the moment she sees kisame has my heart in fits. i absolutely support my little murder kid and her life goals to be Just Like That (read the notes)

Warmth by kosmeja

ship: narusasusaku // words: 4296 // chapters: 1/1

In which Naruto has a nightlight, Sasuke is afraid of the dark and doesn't want to admit it, and somehow, Sakura is the perverted one.

Or: Team 7 have a brief conversation in the dark.

au. not to sure where this is timeline wise, but sakura is a chunin. they love her so much, yeah im crying about it. they just want her to feel good about herself and that theyre there to support her and im sobbing rn i love team 7 so much

House Upon a Rock by KuriQuinn

ship: sasusaku // words: 4311 // chapters: 1/1

She sort of considers herself the last resort, the one to pull him through; it never really occurs to her that she’s the one that could fall.

yeah!!! literal and metaphorical support!!! sakura is so good here i love her. shes just a kid and she wants to be able to support her teammates even if that means literally carrying them after they pass out from exhaustion. i super love how kuriquinn writes ss interactions and this fic is no different aa (also i cant believe he never gave her the spar she asked for :/) can be read as platonic if you want! it’s mostly onesided any way

Sakura of the Red Sands by Dovey

ship: gaasaku // words: 4811 // chapters: 1/1

Sasori hates Hatake Kakashi. He meets a young girl with reason to hate the man too, and finds the perfect opportunity for revenge.

If he accidentally builds a family along the way, well. He always was exemplary at exceeding expectations.

au. sasori never defected. set roughly around chunin exam arc. sasori is an asshole as per usual and accidently becomes sakura’s pseudo older brother figure? it’s actually super endearing how proud of her he becomes and how much he starts to root for her sjdndk though it is a Little unnerving here and there and there are parts where sasori is noticeably less normal than the average person. also MOKUTON SAKURA!!!!! she’s op and meets gaara and they click and this whole fic is maybe a little weird but mostly interesting (also the author notes are good please read them!!) warning for maybe questionable levels of attachment? oh also a kind of coerced amputation!

⭐Into the Water by BasicallyAnIdiot

ship: none // words: 5192 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura had always loved the water.

set throughout timeline. i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again but i love when people write sakura as someone who leans more towards her water aspect and this is one of my favorite fics that show that. my girl is connected directly to tobirama nd while he’s actually a bastard, this fic single handedly made me have a reluctant soft spot for him. plus she follows directly in his footsteps and invents jutsus too (god i love her shes so smart and cool) plenty of little spots about love that make me tender. god i love this fic so much and my girl kicks ass 100/10

Parsley Seed Goes Nine Times to the Devil by Mook_aron

ship: none // words: 5445 // chapters: 1/1

Slow to grow, quick to sprout, parsley seed goes nine times to the devil

When she’s six, a man murders her family.

The man is tall, and his features are burned into her mind. She won’t forget him- she won’t let herself forget him.

root sakura au! changes her whole childhood and perspective on village loyalty. kind of poetic and nice to read despite the dark themes. sai is there!! not a lot but he’s there and i love him. i hesitate to call this team as family bc it’s only just starting to develop but you can feel the potential! part 1 of a series i hope continues aa// warnings for emotional abuse, blood, mentions of gore, and murder

⭐Most Girls, or, the one Where Sakura Grows up and Gets a Fan Girl Along the Way by theformerone

ship: none // words: 5869 // chapters: 1/1

In the years between Naruto’s departure and return, Sakura develops.

Aggressively.

She also gains a second shadow.

set throughout timeline, starts immediately after naruto leaves. YEAH BABEY!!! BAMF SAKURA!!! she gets so fucking cool and she trains with team 8 and team gai (and gets close w the rest of the konaha 11 in general)!! she gets the muscles that she deserves that could only aid the fighting style tsunade taught her (and that she deserves in canon ugh) and she turns into such a powerhouse and people love her and it’s what she deserves (also sakura takes moegi under her wing and they’re good for eachother im crying ajdjdj this fic single handedly made me love moegi)

tag along fic: That Girl Thinks She’s the Queen of the Neighborhood (i got news for you! she is!) by theformerone

same au but all from moegi’s perspective and BOY OH BOY I RELATE. she’s got a huge fucking crush on sakura and it’s cute and sakura is teaching her how to kick ass and it’s inspiring *chef hand kiss* (word count: 6624)

I Won’t Go Down, Your Blushing Bride by felinedetached

ship: inosaku // words: 6186 // chapters: 1/1

(Three things come after that:

1. The moment of realisation. The moment she realises Sasuke’s left the village, gone off to do who knows what with Orochimaru-

2. Her memory returns to her - she was useless against her teammate; taken down by a pressure point and unable to do anything to prevent him from getting at it.

3. Inner rages, throws herself around, cursing and screaming until finally, finally she calms and she says Uchiha Sasuke is a traitor.)

In which Sakura gets the character development she deserved.

set throughout timeline. sakura basically gets adopted by every shinobi adult and it makes my heart so happy. not a lot of plot (minus that bit near the end), but so much depth!! she really does get the character development she deserves. she grows up scary and so op and inner is still there and she dates ino and theyre so soft im crying

Is the Real Over There More Vivid Than Here Ever Feels by falterth

ship: hinasaku // words: 6366 // chapters: 1/1

The healing process is slow.

set some time after the war. i hate this fic SO much it left me ugly crying. fucking NARUTO dies?????? naruto is eternal he's not allowed to die,, okay but aside from the fact that im in my feelings, this fic is so good in how it deals with grief and coping and other such things of dealing with the death of a loved one and how "coping" by ignoring/forgetting the emotions isnt actually coping. warning for death and therapy and a teensy bit of victim blaming? (it gets worked out tho!)

Ain’t no princess in this tower by atomicmuffin

ship: sakura & tenten // words: 6448 //chapters: 1/1

Boys are idiots. Ninja boys are idiots with deadly weapons, and it's the kunoichi's privilege and duty to call them out on their bullshit.

Or: how Tenten becomes the Konoha equivalent of a coach for kunoichi completely on accident, mostly because of her pathological inability to let shit go.

set after tsunade becomes hokage (au where sasuke doesnt immediately leave) tenten’s pov! oooo we love a girl who supports girls! she helps sakura treat her teammates like normal people who mess up and are really just dumb boys. BIG fan of fics where tenten takes up a mentor/older sis position for sakura bc she holds a really soft spot in my heart. oof im so proud of my girl’s development im really crying about it

⭐Sing as Their Bones Go Marching in Again by felinedetached

ship: inosaku // words: 6929 // chapters: 1/1

Instead, it goes like this: Haruno Sakura is the daughter of two civilians, from civilian families. She is nothing and no one—smart, yes, top kunoichi, yes, but she will never be on par with clan kids. She is teammates to an orphan powerhouse from a dead clan and the last remaining Uchiha.

Haruno Sakura is nothing and nobody, but she breathes and grows and thrives and the forest thrives with her.

(She opens her eyes to wood, grown from nothing, and Hatake Kakashi stares in disbelief at the tree where his student used to be.)

Or, Haruno Sakura should have had the goddamn Mokuton and this author is mad.

set throughout timeline. this fic has me FOAMING at the mouth!!! MOKUTON SAKURA!!! SENJU SAKURA!!! HASHIRAMA PARALLELS!!! SHE’S A BAMF AND OP AS SHIT!!! TSUNADE ADOPTS HER!!! INO IS HER GIRLFRIEND!!!!! i could sing my praises for this fic all day and still not be finished ahxndkek everything is so good, every little detail (like choji and kiba taking up healing) is so fucking delicious PLEASE read, im BEGGING

For Want of Freedom by ThroughtheMirrorDarkly

ship: sakura & team 7 // words: 8908 // chapters: 1/1

Haruno Sakura may seem like she is destined for being a paper ninja, that her choice in this career was a flight of fancy or all based on a fangirl crush. The pink haired girl had no delusions about the life she had chosen, but she would rather die as a ninja then to be bled dry as a slave to her family. Lies and deceptions have built the world around her and Sakura is ready to tear it down, grabbing freedom with both hands.

au. starts off when team 7 first tries to get the bells. sakura’s entire family and backstory is altered and abusive. budding team as family and maybe even actual family between naruto and sakura? *winkwink* some implications of a heavy plot but it doesnt go anywhere and there’s no plans to continue it! warnings for abuse, child experimentation, and mentions of blood

Walk Forward, Don't Look Back by teslatempest

ship: hinasaku // words: 9311 // chapters: 1/1

After the war, Sakura is exhausted.

She decides to make a change.

set post war, some of my favorite types of fics! she goes on a literal road to recovery and it makes my heart so warm because i love her so much and i just want her to be happy and this fic makes me melt///// the hinasaku is only implied once so dont get your hopes up BUT!!! sakura makes narusasu happen and i really said aww out loud in the dopiest voice when sasuke kissed his cheek,, my favorite parts are easily when shes thinking/talking about her emotions bc im a sucker for that good good introspection! warning for mentions of trauma i guess? none of it is all that bad it’s just a good coping fic

Thank You for the Meal by theformerone

ship: narusaku // words: 9876 // chapters: 1/1

Tsunade tells him that the best way to a woman’s heart is through her stomach. Naruto leaves Sakura snacks.

au! not anywhere near as shippy as the tags and description imply? lots of little odd ships like brief mentions of nejisasu nd hinakarin (which has a bit more focus). not very sakura centric but damn beautiful regardless so im keeping it here. actually really fucking emotional with a huge focus on uzushio and the uzumaki clan. made me cry 10/10

⭐Hounds Follow Those Who Feed Them by dragonyfox

ship: narusasusaku // words: 10597 // chapters: 3/3

Kakashi knows when to outsource training, but he also knows that only he can teach them some things.

little bits and pieces of their lives before the last chapter in the first part of this series :(( my heart is soft and full of sadness **READ THE FIRST PART OF THIS SERIES** it’s a hound will die for you but never lie to you and i have it listed a little further down

⭐The Sound by LadyKG

ship: none // words:13231 // chapters: 4/4

They lost. Completely. Totally. Lost. They thought it impossible, that the fates would reject this outcome for tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow. They have been punished for this belief. And for that, she will go back. Sakura-time travel AU

set post war. INCREDIBLY disorienting. really good to read when you’re existing a little to the left. im not a huge fan of time travel fics but holy shit?? this fic really is something else/ sakura needs to keep obito alive while dealing with hallucinations(?) of her family from her timeline. this is really fucking good actually and she kills danzo and ive got the second part here further down. warning for death

Gallant by Crunchysunrises

ship: sakura & itachi // words: 14890 // chapters: 3/3

On the day that he makes genin, Itachi sees Sakura. It changes the course of his life.

starts when itachi is a genin and sakura is a tiny little baby. non mass. very itachi centric but sakura is such a pivotal part of his life. itachi truly deserves better (it’s friendship!!! itachi is traumatized and dependent)

The Fury by LadyKG

ship: none // words: 15711 // chapters: 4/4

Sequel to 'The Sound'. She needs to keep moving, looking forward and fixing the problems of the past. If she doesn’t the world might just fall apart a second time. Sakura time travel AU.

sequal to The Sound (above somewhere)(read that one first ofc). just as confusing and disorienting as the first one! i love love love how the flashbacks are written where theres no discernible break between past and present. also i didnt mention it in the summary of pt 1 but yamato is so cute! im glad he’s getting better things (same goes for itachi!). warning that things kinda loop and it really is a little disorienting. like whole paragraphs repeat. warning for death too

The Lessons Change by exarite

ship: none // words: 17529 // chapters: 5/5

In another world, Haruno Sakura is known to be the best medic-nin of all time, renowned for her surpassing of her master and with a fearsome reputation for her strength and medical feats.

This is not that world.

aus. bundle of oneshots where sakura gets different teachers and how that changes things. (notes in the first chapter highlight the little issue i have w how sakura developed under tsunade) read the summaries and notes (beginning and end) for info abt the chapter! heavy warnings in chapter 4 for gore, emotional manipulation, blood, and experimentation. also in chapter 2 sakura has a childish crush on shisui and in chapter 3 theres a single line where he implies smthn

⭐Your Childhood Home is just Powder-White Bones (and You'll Never Find Your Way Back) by Dovey

ship: none // words: 24367 // chapters: 11/11

Sasuke is not the only one who worries he's getting too comfortable in his genin life. Itachi decides to add another motivator to Sasuke's revenge plans by kidnapping the teammate who wasn't a charismatic Jinchuriki. Sakura is used to being an objective for those around her, not a person, but even for her this is a little much.

In which Sakura is held captive and learns what a genjutsu specialist can do to a person's mind, that sharks can actually make great friends, joins a dying clan, and gets regifted multiple times before she's finally strong enough to fight back.

starts off when theyre genin. itachi is unhinged and sakura gets the short end of the stick :( LOTS of trauma. my girl gets really messed up and learns a lot of things purely to survive and has a loose grasp on reality. kisame isnt a good guy (read the notes at the end of chapter 10!) but he gives her sharks which is cool. kabuto is bad and so is orochimaru and kimimaro makes me sad but thats all par for the course. sakura gets some sick water things and also tsunade gets to be there and sakura makes her own family. warnings for torture, gore, dissociation, general loss of reality, blood, and death

⭐Survival of the Fittest by cywscross

ship: sakura & shikamaru // words: 24790 // chapters: 1/1

Sakura is thirteen, still a Genin, lost in the middle of Earth Country, lugging an unconscious Chuunin around, and so far beyond scared that she’s moved right on to pissed off.

au. naruto i love you but jesus christ. bamf sakura and shikamaru just trying to survive so they can get home and hopefully rip naruto a new one. really really cool to read abt shikamaru and sakura being smart and working together and plenty interesting bits of introspection. god this fic is just so good and the slow deterioration into kids just trying to stay alive while having nothing but each other and developing unhealthy codependency as a result is so damn interesting. also i cried 10/10 they care about each other so much

⭐Being Over-Prepared is Impossible (and other mottos) by Pleasedial123

ship: none // words: 40071 // chapters: 15/15

In one world, Kakashi awoke, felt grieved at being assigned a team he sees his own in, and he let that grief make him a lazy teacher. He saw himself in Sasuke, Obito in Naruto, and Rin in Sakura. He woke, saw himself in them, and took a large step back, regretting accepting them as his new team. In another world he was quite hands off, merely a watcher because it was so very painful to watch. He saw himself and all his mistakes in this new team of his.

In this world, Kakashi awoke, saw the similarities, and instantly panicked. He suddenly realized what he had done, passing a team. Kakashi was left scrambling not to repeat old mistakes and regrets. This team would not suffer the fate of his team.

In this world, simply put, Kakashi became a teacher. This is the starting of a new Team seven.

set early genin days. TEAM AS FAMILY BABY!!!!!!!! theyre all babies and dumb and reckless but theyre in it together! not as sakura centric as other fics on this list but her development into essentially team leader is so so good!! kakashi loves his kids so much aa

can be read alone but theres a sequel!: Surviving is the Same Thing as Winning (words: 22492 // chapters: 11/? // updated: 2/9/19)

⭐A Hound Will Die For You, but Never Lie to You by dragonyfox

ship: narusasusaku // words: 41065 // chapters: 9/9

Kakashi caught his breath and pretended like he was just thinking about what to say. His dogs saw through it. “I’m thinking of having my team sign the dog contract.”

Pakkun nodded thoughtfully. “That might piss off some powerful people, boss.”

au! (chapter title is the pov) starts somewhere post wave and pre chunin exam. sakura is kakashis favorite and it really makes me wanna cry when fics do that PLUS SHE GETS A HUGE FUCK OFF BATTLE AXE BABY!!!!!!!! they get different developments!!! sasuke gets to be the medic and im really happy about it because he seems sO HAPPY!!! also they get cute dogs and it’s all very sweet. developing themes of team as family which im a sucker for plus developing poly t7 (pining sasuke!) which im REALLY a sucker for aa it was such a happy fic but WOW that last chapter takes no prisoners warning for super brief mention of rape and there’s major character death in the last chapter :(

⭐Samsara by KuriQuinn

ship: sasusaku // words: 54177 // chapters: 8/8

Sakura’s words die in her throat as the man’s eyes shoot open, and the coldest red irises she has ever seen meet hers. She is hit by a wave of terrifying certainty about two things right then – that she knows these eyes better than any other and that, if he wanted to, this man could stop her heart with just a look.

set during their travels. FINALLY!!! the parallels of three that ive been needing my whole ass life!! also sasuke is doting and worried and it’s cute. super fucking interesting and half of it takes place during the Ootsutsuki time (aka naruto & sasuke’s first incarnations) warnings for nsfw and some weird loss of identity/time stuff? it’s a great fic though, easily one of my top faves

⭐A Girl in the Forest of Moss and Bone by theformerone

ship: none // words: 65665 // chapters: 6/6

Katsuyu spits acid in her eyes, and Sakura must prove herself worthy enough for the slugs of Shikkotsu Forest to heal.

Or, it doesn’t translate to ‘damp bone forest’ for nothing.

IF THERE’S A FIC WHOSE SERIES ID RECCOMEND IN ITS ENTIRETY IT IS ABSOLUTELY THIS FIC. IF YOU LOVE SAKURA (AND SLUG SAGE SAKURA ESPECIALLY) PLEASE READ THE BALLAD OF THE SLUG SAGE SERIES. IT OWNS MY WHOLE SOUL. guhh sakura is so adorable in the first chapter (kakashi.. choke) GOD. the fucking uhhhh worldbuilding??????? its Actually my favorite thing aa op’s writing style makes me wanna cry it flows so smoothly and it’s so clever and makes me laugh and keeps me enthralled and FUCK sakura IS SO FUCKING COOL AAAAAAAA /// she loves learning and she loves the world and the world loves her and MAYBE im screaming about it. and i LOVE that this fic leans into how nature is ever changing and always moving and a constant balance like it really makes me choke on love.. her friends love her lots :((( warning for blood and mentions of death. im BEGGING you guys to read the rest of this series.. my girl is worth songs :’)

Broken Glass by Emma_Raye

ship: none // words: 68800 // chapters: 29/29 // updated: 11/6/18

Naruto and Sasuke left Sakura pathetically broken, but like any good shinobi she put the pieces back together the only way she knew how: relentless training. Years later Konoha is in the midst of a war and Sakura is a force to be reckoned with. Frankly, she's not even sure if she wants her teammates back.

au. starts during the early parts of tsunades training (with a timeskip) sakura has a lot of feelings of abandonment and im proud of how much shes achieved! shes in anbu and a diplomat (theres a war going on) and she stands on her own two feet! shes got a weird relationship w morality and starts questioning the way things are run.. also she holds a lot of resentment towards naruto and sasuke but it gets worked on throughout (and they become a team again!!!) im not a fan of how they treated her like shes something to be protected however briefly. sakura needs a mental health lifetime but god damn if she isnt smart and OOF the poetic cinema of it all,, warning for blood, death, and major character death

Home is Where the Heart is by deeppoeticgirl

ship: sasusaku // words: 100849 // chapters: 26/26 // updated: 12/20/18

And with every moment together, they get just a little closer, a little more comfortable with each other. Fall a little more in love.

set post war. okay listen. barring morally repulsive ships (kksk, itsk, mdsk, etc.) any sakura ship makes me happy if it’s healthy and loving even if i dont like the ship (like i dont care abt shikasaku and canon ss is SO bad i still cant believe it happened) THAT BEING SAID. this fic is cute and sasuke cares a lot and op wrote him so emotive and i love the little family he became a part of on his trips and sakura is a lovestruck fool (which still has me gritting my teeth bc it doesnt idk. Fit with the rest of her personality) but it’s cute if second hand embarrassing,, honestly this fic is so ooey gooey and full of cheesy love and it’s damn near too much (how many times can a person blush.. like fr..) and theres annoying bits of needless drama and lack of communication but im stubbornly holding onto this fic bc i LOVE the character study type route this fic takes/// (this fic is like. really dramatic.. thats a warning in and of itself and i mean like telenovela type dramatic emotion and subtext. not plot twisty dramatic) warning for violence, mentions of blood, and nsfw

Follow the Sun by LaceyJane

ship: gaasaku // words: 106341 // chapters: 21/21

Stranded in the desert, without food, water, or her supplies, Sakura decides to head west to the land of shifting winds and scorching sands. It hasn’t even been a year since the wind nation had tried to overthrow her city, but she knows of someone out there, someone who, above anyone else, holds the best chance of finding her in this barren land. Able to only hope her attempts to raise attention aren’t in vain, she sets off across the sands towards the west, intent to follow the sun.

not super positive where in the timeline this is (or if it’s an au) but if i had to hazard a guess id say between sakura being taken on as an apprentice and before sasuke leaves. starts off w sakura by herself traversing through a desert with the clothes on her back. she suffers before she gains but at least it’s not for long (Well..) also can i say that i LOVE worldbuilding and i LOVE how different aspects of suna were protrayed here. like the scouting and political things (sakura being the hokages apprentice and how shed be treated in other villages) and temari in general? ugh! theres focus on gaara and how he’s coping with his demon too plus he’s just kinda cute in this fic. warning for violence, the general bad things that happen while unprepared in a desert, and the q slur except it’s not used in regard to gay ppl in any way. nothing is romantic so it can be taken as friendship if it’s what you’d prefer!

⭐Time Flies Like an Arrow by Katlou303

ship: inosaku // words: 240288 // chapters: 36/36 // updated: 2/1/19

Sakura traveled back in time with the intent of changing everything, but something went wrong, and now she's four years old having nightmares about impossible monsters and losing friends she has yet to meet.

time travel fic!!!!! oh my heart is soft :( starts off when theyre tiny kids and sakura stands up for naruto (childhood friends!!) sakura’s memories of her prev timeline come to her in dreams (pretty intense for a kid to be having.. ily kagami:( ) SHISUI AND GENMA ARE THERE!!! ILY BABIES,, shes literally so baby and small and full of love for her friends :((((( shisui is fanastic and also a mess, baby sasuke is the cutest, itachi deserves better, sakuras family has me weak as hell theyre so perfect, and inner sakura in this fic is prev timeline sakura (who is so fucked up holy jesus) tsunade gets a new family member and oh fuck gaara is so cute and same goes for tenzo AND BONUS MOKUTON????? the ocs are really interesting and good and i love them (the word count is a little inaccurate bc theres parts at the end of the chapters themselves that are more like authors notes) warning for trauma, flashbacks, blood, gore, death, implied child abuse (never happens but it gets mentioned a lot), and major character death (kagami… :( ) GUYS I JUST REALIZED IT ENDED ON MY BDAY

IN PROGRESS

Grit Your Teeth (and Smile) by kattenprinsen

ship: none // words: 1423 // chapters: 2/? // updated: 8/1/18

Sakura is an immigrant. Her father is an immigrant too.

au. okay okay this is a pet peeve of mine with canon itself bc sakura was team seven’s token “has parent’s that are alive and support her” except that was genuinely never shown?? we know Nothing substantial about mebuki and kizashi and their relationship with sakura and fsnsksnk im ranting. this fic is nice and yeah there’s not a lot happening so far but i love the depth op is giving to sakura’s parents so much (and they are totally different from canon btw. theyre very good ocs and her dad is a missing nin from mist with sharp teeth aaa) (sakura is also a little bit of a bamf as a result of her parents and im crying about it)

Was That Your Voice or Was That Me by grit

ship: sakura & sasori // words: 1528 // chapters: 1/5 // updated: 10/9/18

Sasori takes Sakura on as an apprentice out of boredom and keeps her because she has potential and he is pragmatic to a fault.

Spontaneity doesn't suit his plans though and Sakura has her own opinion on murder, so it goes about as well as you'd expect.

au where this story take free reign of the timeline. sasori meets sakura when shes a little kid and takes a shining to her potential (as everyone should...). kinda fucked up tbh! at least a little bit! warning for murder and emotional manipulation. the only chapter seems to just be setting up the rest of the story where sasori essentially changes her whole mentality

Tables They Are Turning (Bridges They Are Burning) by pg13

ship: sakura & team 7 // words: 1555 // chapters: 1/? // updated: 7/19/18

It’s not until she’s convulsing and the heat from her neck is spreading that she wonders if maybe she should’ve listened when her mother told her to reconsider being a shinobi.

set during chunin exam. SAKURA GETS BIT INSTEAD OF SASUKE. sasuke gets fiercely protective and learns of the incredible emotion called friendship. lots of promising things happen and then it gets cut off when it REALLY starts to get into it AAA/// i Know this fic is gonna be delicious

Skin is Just a Ready Made Coffin by ulittuq

ship: none // words: 2026 // chapters: 2/? // updated: 7/27/18

The night of the Uchiha Massacre is chaos. Alarms are blaring and shinobi are flying through the street and somewhere Sasuke Uchiha is waking up from seventy-two hours of psychological torture courtesy of his big brother.

Sakura Haruno hides under her bed with her hands clasped over her mouth trying to stifle her breathing and praying that the stranger prowling her house can’t hear her heartbeat.

(read author note at the beginning to see how the timeline is changed) some faceless guy takes advantage of the disaster on the night of the massacre and kills sakura’s family to help his mom(??) and that’s literally it! starts off balls to the walls!! feeds into my feral love of the naruto civilians and how they might resent shinobi. i LOVE fics where civilians are the main focus and how they might be disenfranchised (especially in the hidden villages) as opposed to ninjas. theres not a lot of plot yet but it’s building up to smthn good!! i hope sakura keeps that little bit distrust towards shinobi and the system in her heart! blind loyalty to the state is unhealthy. warning for death, murder, gore, and panic attacks

Daisies and Lilacs by Pinnacle of Failure (Cromirn)

ship: none // words: 2487 // chapters: 1/? // updated: 12/5/18

She's always seen them. Sometimes they scare her, like every shadow to a child should. But there's something to them that she doesn't have, something that she doesn't want.

starts off early academy days up to when they meet kakashi. might not end up being a multi chapter fic. she sees things so im clocking her as psychotic in this fic bc same hat! not a whole lot in the way of plot but the writing style is neat!

⭐To Serve Man by Dovey

ship: none // words: 3090 // chapters: 2/? // updated: 3/19/18

Kizashi Haruno was a civilian man with a simple shop, from a civilian family of simple farmers; Mebuki Haruno was a missing nin from the land of Rain. Sakura took after both her parents.

“You owe yourself to three things, in order: the ones you love, yourself, and then your village.”

au. the rest of the summary is such a mood, i wish we got actual info about her parents :/ i LOVE this fic and i want more content about this universe because im nothing if not a sucker for sakura with a missing nin parent aaa,,, mebuki is so cool and sakura learns early on that blind loyalty to a village is not a good thing to cultivate. her morals are very based around earned loyalty and death bc thats what her mom knew (and i love and appreciate that she motivates sakura to aim for “flee on sight” if she were to ever end up in the bingo book) also kizashi is so sweet and supportive djefk warning for animal death and murder

I’ve Been Waiting my Whole Life (When I’ve Only Been Dreaming) by SheBeanSheep

ship: none // words: 3329 // chapters: 3/? // updated: 7/19/18

Before she was a boy-crazy fangirl, Sakura wanted nothing more than to be a good shinobi. Afterall, that’s what the voice, Inner Sakura, wanted. But Sakura just wanted to be Ino’s friend. So all of her energy went into making sure Ino would still like her, would still consider her a friend and a rival. So, Sakura bypassed the training scrolls of her childhood and picked up a hairbrush, shutting Inner Sakura away.

Then, Team 7 got the Wave Mission.

Then, Inner Sakura got a name.

Then, everything changed.

starts during wave. INNER BECOMES A SUBSTANTIAL CHARACTER HELL YEAH. and now shes actually mito uzumaki?? fucking legendary, nothing less than the best for my queen! mito kicks sakura’s ass into high gear and starts turning her into the bamf she was destined to be (though it hasnt actually gotten to that point ajdj i cant wait for future updates aaa)

Training Sakura by Kalira

ship: sakura & kakashi // words: 3601 // chapters: 2/? // updated: 11/25/18

Two members of Team Seven broke away on their own, and in the aftermath there remains only one thing to be settled. . . That one thing is not what anyone expected.

With Sakura as his sole remaining student, Kakashi settles in to train her properly, determined to help her achieve her ambitions as a ninja and become a great one.

set after naruto leaves. gai is a real one! yeah maybe i did start tearing up by the end of the first chapter. im emotional okay. also ive read so many fics where ino doesnt GET to be sakura’s best friend and it hurts me directly so this fic really makes me happy (bonus really short tag-along fic title Mistress where sakura gets a puppy aa)

Of Which Do I Change by Pinnacle of Failure (Cromirn)

ship: none // words: 3772 // chapters: 4/? // updated: 1/16/19

It starts and it ends in confusion. There never was a true destination in life, in what she was and what actually defined her. But one thing happened, and now she is someone, her name is on the lips of the Hokage and Clan heads and now they see who she is. Too bad she can't do that anymore.

But she takes pride in that. She has pink hair and green, useless, eyes. She is an anomaly in her own right, and that makes her strong, that makes her a terror in her own right.

starts off pre/early academy days. seems to be setting up to be a longer fic? interesting bits abt clan stuff! i do feel a little bad for ino :( sakura’s drive to have a name again is really nice to read and i KNOW shes gonna be cool as shit. not much in the way of a major plot insofar but still really good!!!

The Senju Whisperer by callmeportgas

ship: sakura & hashirama // words: 4754 // chapters: 2/? // updated: 11/14/18

In which Sakura comes to fully embrace the heritage her family couldn't, with some help from her imaginary friend.

au! MOKUTON SAKURA BBY!!!!! the story is only JUST developing but i can already see the building friendship between naruto and sakura!!!

Dont Think, Just Run by alicemc12

ship: none // words: 4806 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 3/10/19

Sakura was left behind after an ambush. Left for dead by mistake, until her life is saved by a young girl. With everyone believing her dead, Sakura is left to see the world from a different side. Without thinking, she runs away from the past she can't change and to a fate only she can control. Because it's just as a little girl said, the future will never be set in stone unless you let it.

starts off in oc pov. not sure where in the timeline this is but she knows how to heal by this point. COOL PLOT!! love the fate stuff and how much of a bamf sakura gets to be even though it's very ff.net-esque

Way of the Cherry Blossom by chadsuke

ship: none // words: 5422 // chapters: 16/? // updated: 9/8/18

Healing isn't a bad profession, Sakura knows. She could do well in it. But healing means that you're the one picking up the pieces, putting your teammates back together.

Sakura wants to stop them from getting hurt at all.

starts after sasuke “dies” in wave but before they go back to the village. shes a baby and wants to be able to stand beside the rest of her team. her family is so good in this fic! and so is kakashi even though he subjected her to gai. sasuke is cute too and naruto always is. theres some sentences that arent really jokes but are worded in such a fantastic way that i end up cackling. it’s all pretty lighthearted! warning for brief mention of death

⭐Salt in the Wound by Dovey

ship: sakura/oc // words: 6033 // chapters: 4/? // updated: 3/30/18

The Wave arc, except Sakura’s flimsy attempt at protecting the client results in her accidentally faking her death. Zabuza survives and takes her along with him as an apprentice, and she grows up in the harder but more emotional life of a nin on the run.

aka I have a lot ideas of how Missing-Nin would have a different culture than the rest of Naruto-verse, that would place a high-value on youngins’ in the trade given the rarity, and Sakura gets a lot of teachers over the years for the price of lots of emotional trauma & loss.

also, she gets a big fuck-off sword.

starts off during wave arc. ZABUZA I LOVE YOU. he takes sakura in because he’s a lonely missing nin who got used to caring for another person. sakura isnt as against the idea of staying with zabuza as she tries to pretend to be. also, GOD the reactions of the rest of the konoha twelve really really break me?? sasuke spirals faster and naruto gets essentially adopted by sakura’s parents? and kakashi gets fiercely protective. warning for death, animal death, and kinda graphic murder? also theres no actual ship even a little implied so far

Sharp by ineffableblue

ship: none // words: 6309 // chapters 2/? // updated: 3/12/19

Sakura has been teased, gotten angry for that, then gotten teased for getting angry. Everything she does isn't enough. But she's observant and slowly she starts to find out that she fits in better in the ninja world than she ever imagined. The best ninja are always thought to be something else and Sakura is a master at being mistaken for harmless.

starts when shes baby. sakura is full of rage and bottling it up like a molotov cocktail (and her parent are given depth which is great! but they kinda suck which isnt so great! it's a "tough love" sort of thing but it still rubs me wrong) i love and support sakura's desire to seek out knowledge on her own! and i am SO HAPPY this fic updated i could cry,, i KNEW the title and desc were familiar when i saw them at the top of the sakura fic tag one day and i yelled when i realized it WAS the same fic i had already put under left unfished// op if you're reading this know that im filled w love and support :')

Because I Ache by Wyle23

ship: narusaku // words: 6512 // chapters: 3/? // updated: 9/4/18

Ugly are the truths of the world. Hate's competitor can jail just as blindly. Focused otherwise, though, what changes would her shift in truth bring? In which Konoha's young jinchuuriki stumbles upon not a Hyuuga, but a Haruno.

starts when theyre babies!! little five year olds who deserve better (bby sakura id do anything for you.. :’() theyve got tiny crushes and theyre so cute i wanna cry about it. ino nd sakura stay friends (thank god) and GOD i want ppl to stop being mean to naruto :((

The Shadows Claim Us by Nine_Stoic_Crayolas

ship: gaasaku // words: 6586 // chapters: 39/? // updated: 4/21/18

"You don't want to go near that one." "Why?" "...She's damaged goods."

takes place in suna! (sakura is an iwa native!) (also i have.no idea how old they are. it’s mentioned at one point that sakura’s 4 but.. idk? if there?s time skips?? there’s just lots of bits that arent worded right for them to be 4 through the whole fic.. idk. gimme ur input actually idk if i wanna keep this) gaara takes a shining to her bc sakura also gets called a monster. bro these little gremlins are fucking pissed. imagine a toddler yelling “fuck!” at you but constantly. warning for general mistreatment of children and mentions of death and blood

Serendipity by stirringwinds

ship: none // words: 6751 // chapters: 2/? // updated: 10/24/18

Sasuke had never known Senju Hashirama in person, of course. But he had grown up hearing stories about the First Hokage at his mother’s knee—about the legend who had defeated the most powerful member of their own clan. Enough stories to recognise what he was seeing—and to know he was witnessing his teammate perform the impossible.

Or, in the fight against Gaara during Suna’s attempted invasion of Konoha, the Ichibi’s attempt to kill Sakura awakens an unexpected power. It changes the destiny of Team Seven forever.

MOKUTON SAKURA BABEYYY!!!!! largely sasuke’s pov. also they’re all stupid and it’s funny and i love them// im literally foaming at the mouth and excited to see where the story goes and im :pensive:

Warmth by PotatoeGoddess

ship: inosaku // words: 7135 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 4/7/18

Sakura Haruno was born screaming and kicking and in some ways, she felt, she kind of never stopped.

starts off pre/early academy days. sakura is full of strong emotions and same hat. there’s comphet and sakura has such a crush on ino. what a useless gay. that’s not really a focus in the story (more just consistently implied) honestly dont all together know whats going on! but that’s par for the course

What Happens After by stirringwinds

ship: narusasusaku // words: 8044 // chapters: 3/? // updated: 1/13/19

Sakura deals with her feelings once she can stop focusing on stopping the world from imploding. Just what exactly is her place in this world?

This is just a lot of Sakura can't deal with life right now.

set post series. lotta sakura introspection! she’s dealing with a lot of feelings of inferiority and emotions she doesnt acknowledge bc shes a disaster bi. i actually cried bc her feelings towards her own self worth hit me with all kinds of feelings of catharsis. canon sakura really needs smthn like this. just a chance to recover :(.. warning for lots of poly ships if ur not into that

⭐Catharsis by pastanoodle

ship: none // words: 10198 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 8/16/17

Sakura isn’t the kind of person to survive past Genin. She wears pink, fights over boys, and can’t throw a Kunai to save her life. Which is why no one expects her to live very long. To Sakura, graduating from the academy is like a reality check. Being a shinobi is nothing close to how civilian romance novels make it seem. Sakura has always been terrible at stopping when she should. So she changes pink to grey, forces herself to ignore Sasuke, and learns how to shatter bones with a single punch. Screw surviving. Sakura knows she’s going to die, but she’ll go down fighting.

starts off a little before wave except!! the full wave arc never happens and everything changes!! inner becomes a substantial part of the story and im so glad for it. oh my god this fic is so good and i love all the author notes, theyre so delicious. sakura starts developing from a calm, quiet, and accepting girl. to a shinobi who is pissed off about the hand she was dealt with and goddammit! shes gonna do something about it!!! you fucking go, girl, live your dream of being in the bingo books i love you. this fic hasnt updated in a while and im so teary eyed about it, i hope it’s not being left unfinished. i refuse to put it under that category bc im stubborn and hopeful. warning for death and gore in the second chapter

Red With Clay, or Into Fire by grit

ship: sakura & team 7 // words: 10420 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 11/4/18

Headstrong, carrying her heart on her sleeve: Sakura is a smart and driven child who will fight for what's hers.

Or: Sakura gets a personality, Naruto some friends and Sasuke a childhood.

starts off during their litle genin introductions.TEAM AS FAMILY Y’ALL ALREADY KNOW! sasuke actually likes his team basically from the get go??? and sakura just wants her team to workout and they do! theyre getting there!!! oof!!!!!!!!

Breathe and Heal by Himechiiii

ship: narusasusaku // words: 11535 // chapters: 3/? // updated: 1/6/18

Two months. Two months had passed since the end of the Fourth Great Shinobi War. Two months and Sakura still hadn’t fully processed. Hadn’t fully healed. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do now. I don’t know what my goal is supposed to be. You say that I’ve passed them, but it doesn’t feel like it. I close my eyes and all I see is their backs in front of me.”

Or in which Sakura realizes she is more than she thought she was, and lets herself be loved.

set post war. sakura gets well deserved time off of work to cope with things (and ino is real one :( please stop forgetting she’s her best friend) sakura loves her boys so much but god her inferiority complex makes me so sad

Promises by BombsAreForBabies

ship: none // words: 12376 // chapters: 8/? // updated: 10/29/18

It's her first kiss and Naruto's last. She promises him that she will bring Sasuke home. It's his dying wish, after all.

(Naruto bleeds out faster than the kyuubi can heal him.

Sakura learns that being a ninja is more than fancy jutsu and fun.

Sasuke does not know that he just killed his best friend and turned his most loyal comrade into his worst enemy.)

set after the first fight in the valley of the end. bamf sakura that deserves a break.. immediate warning for death :( kakashi and sakura connect in the aftermath and ino remains as the realest. sakura learns poisons from shizune!!!!! FINALLY!!! everyone cares about her a lot and that makes me happy but god can she PLEASE get a therapist

When I Grow Up I’ll Be An Avalanche (and i’ll grow up soon) by ulittuq

ship: none // words: 12900 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 12/10/18

A little civilian girl hears that genin are considered adults in the eyes of the law and she think yes please I need to get out--

The next week she starts the Academy.

Once a little civilian girl tells an orphan boy, God I wish I didn’t have parents, and she means it as a confession. A cry for help. The orphan boy hears selfishness spill from her mouth and snaps.

A little civilian girl, who has yet to see combat, wakes from nightmares gasping and clawing at her skin. No one notices.

au! naruto canon never gave us anything for sakura’s parent so fics like this own me! i like where theyre portrayed as abusive bc well canon doesnt disprove it! and projection. also. owns me inner also has more focus!! sakura just wants an out and she’s gonna do most anything to get there. also naruto love!! because he deserves it! warning for abuse (mentions of emotional and physical) im super excited for more updates i like where the story is going!!

Mune Ga Hachikire Soude by clohsoo

ship: none // words: 15815 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 3/24/19

A deal is made between two devils and two girls share a demon.

HEY OP IF YOURE READING THIS: I LOVE YOU AND I SUPPORT YOU AND THIS IS SO GOOD TY FOR GIVING LOVE TO MY GIRL RIN,, au set mostly in rin's pov (i love the hobbies rin picks up, my little jack of all trades) danzo can still choke, sakura bby.. ily..:(((, ino is always amazing, and ANKO!! I LOVE YOU!!! OOF sakura's attempts at acting like a normal kid REALLY plucks at my heart strings// warning for child abuse bc root, death bc root, and trauma also.. bc root

⭐The Best-Looking Truth by Dovey

ship: sakura & team 7 // words: 17378 // chapters: 6/? // updated: 1/7/19

Sakura doesn’t like to talk about her family. Most people assume it’s because she’s a nice young girl, and she doesn’t want to make everyone else feel bad, considering she’s on a team of orphans.

It has more to do with the fact that she killed her parents in self-defense and is desperately trying to cover up the murders, than any sympathy for her teammates- but she’s happy to let you assume what you want.

did that summary give you whiplash? because it absolutely made me collapse. set just before the bell test. also starts off pretty fucking strong. shes a traumatized kid trying to compartmentalize on her own while trying to make sure no one finds out about what she did. also she’s really smart in the way she’s dealing with the aftermath. really interesting (at least to me) is how despite her parents no longer having a direct hold on her life, she still abides by their rules. warning for (past) child abuse, murder, and occassionaly descriptive gore. godd i really want more (there’s narusaku and some sakura/oc but i dont think theyre permanent? the narusaku definitely isnt bc it was mostly an accident but im not sure abt the sakura/oc)

Control by Dragonist

ship: none // words: 17816 // chapters: 14/? // updated: 6/8/18

Kumo kidnaps a child of Konoha.

Sakura graduates from the academy only a year after starting it. There's a war going on, and she's obedient enough to stay quiet and follow orders.

Then the war ends, and it's unclear who is really giving them.

au (read notes for the changes) starts pre academy. bro??? theres a war going on and im stressed at how young she is when she graduates.. sai ily..warning for death, blood, and uh. bad medical practices

If I Live by Lalit

ship: none // words: 18344 // chapters: 9/? // updated: 8/21/18

Every action has a consequence. It took one girl to screw all of Orochimaru’s plans up, and nothing will ever be the same. “Look at you, such bloodlust. Darkness is a lovely shade on you, my dear.”

set during chunin exam. ANOTHER SAKURA GETS BIT INSTEAD OF SASUKE FIC. a little slow going in terms of timeline i guess? no timeskipping so far. love the relationship between team 7 here (esp that one scene w naruto. u did amazing sweetie!) warning for death and gore and also sexual undertones when orochimaru is there. he’s a creep and op sells it.

Black Hole Heart by LadyNyxRavus

ship: none // words: 20017 // chapters: 5/8 // updated: 2/18/19

By all accounts, Sakura is dead for the first five minutes of her life.

Yet, she continues. If she occasionally has too many, too sharp teeth then that's their business.

OKAY SO. im NOT a big of crossovers but HEAR ME OUT. sakura gets a symbiote in place of inner and she eats people and naruto is a little more feral and sasuke is the closest thing they have to handlers. warnings for cannibalism, blood, and gore. this is up there as one of the most self indulgent fics on here

Throwing a Stone in a River by theroadkillcafe

ship: none // words: 20221 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 9/7/18

When Sakura graduates from the academy, she suddenly finds her head invaded by the ghost of Uchiha Shisui. Her inner is gone, but not forgotten, and she struggles with impulse control more than ever before. But also, Shisui gives a lot of unsolicited advice - useful and otherwise - and does not shut the fuck up. He’s not thrilled about current events.

warning for immediate mentions of suicide and drowning (and implied eye gore) set just after they graduated from the academy. sakura’s got some fun mental things to deal with now that shes stuck w the ghost and seeing them kinda everywhere. have i mentioned that i love shisui? he’s really good and helps sakura out with gratuitous amounts of snark. warnings for more eye gore, blood, nightmares, and torture

If You Can't Hold on, Hold on by Fiercest

ship: sasusaku // words: 20780 // chapters: 8/? // updated: 12/4/18

Sakura always wished she could relate to her teammates better. She wishes she could take it back.

In which Sasuke acquires some unwanted roommates and a team becomes a family.

set post konoha crush. TEAM AS FAMILY!!! almost immediate warning for death :( gh// her team cares a lot abt her and want her to be okay and sasuke is making effort into being a source of support (he’s baby..) theyre all pretty traumatized (and god fucking awful at dealing with it) (not shippy at this point!)

⭐Find Your Place (Whatever it Takes) by Dovey

ship: none // words: 22296 // chapters: 11/? // updated: 12/28/18

The war lasts longer than in canon, and has only just ended. While most of the 'Konoha 12' are clan heirs and thus protected from having to go to war prematurely, Sakura is from a civilian family, with naturally advanced chakra control, and thus is thrown immediately onto the frontlines. Now she's on a genin team in peacetime, and she's struggling to figure out how to live when she's not constantly at risk of dying.

Team seven bonds in new weird ways, The Uchiha are actually all dead except for Sasuke (including war-hero itachi) who's got a chip on his shoulder the size of Konoha, Naruto isn't the kyuubi container and he finds Sakura kinda scary. Sakura would just like to have a hobby.

au. my girl deals with trauma and t7 learn to get along eventually (and unhealthily?) i love sakura’s war team a lot and they care abt each other a lot too and GOD i love shit that focuses on the advantages clan kids gets for being clan kids and especially for being heirs!! it’s just interesting as hell to read!! sakura fosters her hate and distrust for the state and GOD is that ever a good thing (kushina :(..) we’re in this shit for a REVOLUTION!! IM SO HYPE!!! warning for violence and mentions of death

⭐Building the Puzzle by ich_bin_ein_stern

ship: narusasusakusai // words: 22716 // chapters: 4/5 // updated: 8/27/18

In which Sakura feels disconnected after the 4th Shinobi War and decides to cut the string attaching her to Team Seven, if only for a few years. This does not settle well with the remaining members, past or present.

set post war. FULL POLY TEAM SEVEN BABY!!!!! there’s not a whole lot of content for poly7 that includes BOTH sai and sasuke. it’s usually one or the other which already puts this fic in my good graces uwu ino bby i love you so much they’re so tactile and close and it makes my heart melt and she cares abt sakura and wants them both to be okay. im indulging my need for a sakura who gets to travel!! she loves her team so much but she really needs to love herself first. the rest of her team learns to better themselves and it’s really nice to read. also GOD i say it often but sakura is so cool (esplecially vs the suna elders aa)

Moments of Perfection by kiwi_socks

ship: narusasusaku // words: 22880 // chapters: 6/? // updated: 5/9/18

It's a dream Sakura's had many times before. Until it is rudely interrupted by Naruto and Sasuke mistaking her kitchen window for the front door.

"Hey...we failed in so many ways before, do you think we'll get something right, or just screw up again?"

okay im NOT much of a fan of timetravel fics but everyone should know by now that poly team 7 actually owns me. theyre all stupid together (it’s solidarity). poor kakashi. there’s some fuckery happening!! perhaps i yelled WHAT!? at my phone at least once

⭐Kubikiribocho, My Love by IslitaBonita

ship: none // words: 23231 // chapters: 10/? // updated: 7/22/18

Where Sakura becomes better acquainted with Zabuza's sword, Kubikiribocho.

set mostly during wave. interesting bits of sakura vs herself. budding relationship between her and gaara (murder friends) the writing style is SUPER cool! blood, unhealthy attachment, impalement, and death. ugh! when will this fic come back from war

Believe Me When I Say I Cary All My Sins by Honestly Neptune (mypennameishidden)

ship: none // words: 24287 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 12/20/18

Sakura knew the best way to tear a man's spine out of his nose without breaking a sweat.

She didn't know how to live in a village with Minato as Hokage and the Uchiha clan as the beloved police force. She didn't know how to live as a disgraced genin in a bloody apartment with dead men knocking at her door.

She didn't know how to forgive herself for failing Konoha. Now she had a chance to save it.

au. SUCH cool take on the timetravel trope!! sakura is just angry and tired and she’s gonna make this timeline work so help her god. i love shisui and i love that he gets to be a main character here aa. warnings for blood and general violence

Dandelions Blow in Spring by capriicious

ship: none // words: 24507 // chapters: 13/? // updated: 11/25/18

sakura is in the land of waves, the seraphic, beautiful place filled with religious and cultural beliefs. her team mate is lying in front of her, dead, cold and so, so white. her sensei is bleeding out while fighting zabuza. naruto is fighting against the odds of hundred of senbons.

(or: sakura watches her team mates get beaten half to death and bleed out next to her when the fight ends and with that event set in her mind: realises that she's going to die unless she toughens up.)

au but starts off in wave during the fight w zabuza nd haku so immediate warning for blood, gore, death, and a bit of an unhinged mind bc it’s sakura pov and this is traumatic. i recommend reading the notes at the beginning of each chapter for trigger warnings. it’s a heavy fic. interesting bits about merchant business and the dark side of the village. only BARELY connected to canon. pretty much through characters alone, the whole story is different

Cut the Head off the Snake by itsthechocopuff

ship: none // words: 24601 // chapters: 8/? // updated: 1/2/19

when eighteen-year-old, post-war Sakura is thrown back into her tiny, pre-Academy body, she makes a decision. she’d had a childhood once already, and this time, she’s more interested in Not Dying when the inevitable shit hits the proverbial fan. so she will work harder, care less, kill more, and smile when she’s done.

and hey, if she ends up reviving an extinct nature transformation to attract the most corrupt, power-hungry man from her timeline, all the better for her, right?

IM MENTIONED IN THE NOTES?? UH HELLO I LOVE YOU. timetravel fic! war fesh sakura gets sent back into her pre academy self. sakura is gonna make shit work this time around and shes gonna go through root to do it! MOKUTON BABEY!!! it gets changed from a kekkai genkai to a learned skill based mostly on amazing chakra control (which my girl has in spades!!) SAI AND SHISUI BBY I LOVE YOU// im in love with shin now too and god damn it i want all of them to be okay :’( warning for death at the hand of trees, mentions of blood, and the massacre

Seeds of Knowledge by Ice_Eagle

ship: none // words: 24845 // chapters: 10/? // updated: 3/15/19

It starts with an Academy internship at the Konoha Library and Archives. The only problem is the Library/Archives has never had an intern before. Ever.

Everyone is an idiot at the beginning. There is always room to grow.

set during early academy days. first person pov and it switches from characters. i dont usually leans towards stories with lots of ocs (especially where theyre a major focus) BUT they’re all so interesting plus UM? i LOVE the detail put into the libraries aaa// sakura gets to live her strongest book nerd life. also im a huge fan of the concept of internships in shinobi villages and just of the adults caring abt the kids following them in their career choices. also sakura starts getting along with sasuke and it makes me super happy

Our Oath (We’re Expendable) by amako

ship: none // words: 27194 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 3/1/19

Apparently, Sakura is the last Haruno.

set post war, more during the recovery period. sakura gets to be part of a largely not well known clan with a secret that could put sakura’s life at risk if it got out. dont wanna spoil a lot but basically! she gets married and has to deal with clan things and letting other know

⭐If You Have the Hounds by dragonyfox

ship: narusasusaku // words: 31856 // chapters: 8/? // updated: 1/10/19

...go ahead and pursue.

can i just say.. this fic series really rips out my heart ..there were several parts i started tearing up at bc im tender and im baby! they all love each other more than anything and im crying just thinking about it. they literally built a whole fucking village because naruto is a mad man but his team loves him. literally they’re playing the longest con ever and it has me cackling. this is a hell of a fix it fic and it has me bawling itachi is really soft and team taka is there! (the way uzushio is described makes my heart swell w love im so proud of them)

These Bitter Weeds by Katlou303

ship: sasusaku // words: 33315 // chapters: 8/? // updated: 12/2/18

Sakura begged Sasuke to take her with him when he was leaving Konoha.

He said yes.

set when sasukes leaves. she somehow manages to convince him to let her join? her reasons are about as solid as they could be. in the first chapter you can definitely where it’s starting to change into unhealthy codependency. it really shows in this fic just how young they are.. all their ideals are fantastical and grandeur and it really drives a nail through my heart :( ino continues to be a real one, kakashi is going through it, and im reminded that i love kimi :(( warnings for violence, orochimaru and kabuto, and dismembered limbs. nothing shippy insofar, can be read as friendship

seek by cloverhoney

ship: sasusaku // words: 39062 // chapters: 12/? // updated: 1/15/19

Sakura disappears after taking a lifelong mission in exchange for Sasuke’s post-war acquittal. To give her the upper hand over her new targets and protect her from becoming a target herself, the world is told that Sakura is dead and gone - but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Sakura quickly finds she is still not strong enough to face her new enemies, and she seeks power in Shikkotsu forest. Sasuke, suspicious of the circumstances surrounding her death, seeks the truth regarding her disappearance, reconnecting with his childhood friends along the way.

Kakashi, the new Rokudaime, promises to keep Sakura’s secret, but with Sasuke on his heels, a council hell-bent on erasing the evidence, and the guilt of an empty grave, nothing can stay hidden for long.

set post war/pre epilogue. TAGS SAY SAGE SAKURA BITCH!!! (AND MOKUTON BABEY) shes nice but dumb and thats just team 7 (shes their single brain cell.. how dare she :(((( ) fuck the council. fuck those elders. fuck blue lives mariah carey’s skinny. my only gripe is that shes written as having small chakra reserves nd low stamina and im like. hello? Absolutely Not. whatever parts her Legendary chakra control dont cover, her seal is still there. small reserves my ass. also taijutsu is Literally one of her specialties >:( this happens in fics so often and im *teeth gritting* (FUCK. ACTUALLY. SHE’S FRESH OUT OF THE WAR. SHES TOUGH AS SHIT BY THIS POINT. im angry and annoyed and sad!!!) lol read if you want though. there are some neat bits (like when theyre in shikkotsu forest) mentions of eye gore, death, and blood (t..tbh.. i ignored all the sasuke bits :V IM SORRY I ONLY THINK THE PARTS WITH SAKURA ARE INTERESTING)

How Team 7 Came to Be by spica_starson

ship: sakura & team 7 // words: 40916 // chapters: 5/15 // updated: 10/22/18

What if: -Naruto had reached out to Sasuke earlier on? -Sakura never developed a crush on Sasuke? -The team isn't just a repeat of their predecessor?

What if Team 7 stayed together through thick and thin?

Or: If Team 7 was the focus of the series.

sakura isnt in the first chapter BUT she still gets to be a focal point because of course and the second chapter is dedicated to her. y’all already KNOW im soft for team as family fics!! they’re all best friends and care about each other a lot and im really weak okay. also kakashi loves his new kids. not a cliffhanger! so dont worry if you’re not up for waiting on an update or are like me and prefer reading finished fics! (there’s a separate spinoff one shot, not canon to the original fic, titled Alone set when naruto and sasuke fight on the roof)

Crow’s Disciple by Tobi_Black

ship: none // words: 42135 // chapters: 36/? // updated: 12/9/18

Sakura's just a child, a civilian, considered harmless. No one looks at the pink-haired little girl and sees the kunoichi, the shinobi, that she could become. They don't see the calculating glint in her eyes, nor the claws hidden. They don't see beyond the shy smile and tears. They don't see the loyal heart willing to give everything for those loved. Not yet.

starts off pre academy w sakura nd naruto both in the same orphanage. UGH MY GIRL IS SO SMART and this writing style lends itself so WELL to detail ghghgh// sakura’s bestfriends continue to be blondes and ino fosters a baby crush aa. SHISUI BBY ILY (and asuma gets to be a prominent figure in sakuras life which i hadnt read in a fic before) warnings for violence, death, blood

⭐Dangerous Habits (Dangerous Girl) by Dovey

ship: none // words: 44210 // chapters: 24/? // updated: 11/21/18

After the disasterous mission in Wave, Sakura returns to Konoha with a new drive: she wants to truly earn her spot on Team 7, and be able to protect her teammates. Unfortunately, nobody else seems to be willing to support her new goal, so she resorts to teaching herself: she decides her team needs a medic, and since she doesn’t have the connections or record to earn a place at the hospital, she practices on herself.

AKA the fic where sakura gets to be as dumb and have as little regard for her personal wellbeing as every other Naruto character, & teaches herself how to heal by inflicting & then fixing her own injuries. This deals both with some major changes to the plotline given her new skills, and the overall team dynamic.

starts post wave. sakura gets that kick in the ass to get better and do it fast and she gets to be as reckless as her teammates like she deserves! no one helps her initially but god DAMMIT if shes not gonna do something anyway (flexing her smarts!! shes such a genius and yeah it’s chaotic as hell in this fic but god if it isnt cool) she gets a VERY unhealthy addiction to pain and has to deal with generally negative feelings of self worth.. BUT finds a pal and a friend in gaara :) she gets close to her teammates (sasuke bby… :(((..) and friendly w tenten and tsunade and anko! chapter 12 has a scene w cool imagery// HEFTY (and pretty immediate bc it hits u in the first chapter) warnings for gore, death, self mutilation, misuse of organs (lol), blood, implications of sexual abuse (doesnt happen, the adults are just concerned that thats whats happening and not her. yknow. doing all of uh That)

Unbreakable Company by Shyaway95 and teslatempest

ship: sakura & kakashi // words: 44407 // chapters: 4/15 // updated: 2/5/19

Naruto and Sasuke were gone. Their Village had just begun recovering from the invasion, and every available shinobi was needed. Kakashi knew it was his duty to serve, to leap back into the darkness of ANBU at his Hokage’s command. It was only the thought of pink hair and desperate green eyes that made him pause. Would he abandon his last, remaining student?

He would as soon pluck out his right eye.

They were all that was left of Team Seven and Kakashi was going to make them unbreakable.

set after sasuke defects. HONESTLY kakashi actually doing smthn about his “people who abandon their teammates are worse than scum” saying that he likes to repeat is everything i couldve wanted. sakura deserves all the support in the world and this fic REALLY delivers. this is also a REALLY good fic if you like kakashi and want him to be happy about something. team seven as family is real!! could easily be read as a one shot if you dont wanna wait for updates or read a longer fic!

⭐Early Summer Rain by orlha

ship: none // words: 50063 // chapters: 14/15 // updated: 3/5/19

Having parents doesn’t always mean it’s a good thing and just because scars can’t be seen doesn’t mean they don’t exist. The Chuunin Exams leaves Sakura an orphan and she doesn’t cry.

set post konoha crush. immediate warning for death. sakura has been through a lot and kakashi is a sweetheart. he’s still pretty awkward but his heart is in the right place! god sakura i love you much :((((( shes got a lot of trauma and feelings of inadequacy and it hurts me. sasuke is angrier and naruto continues to be amazing (and i love him for giving sakura smthn to strive for) AND GENMA IS THERE! I LOVE YOU GENMAAA (AND SHIKA)!!! sakura gets praised for her chakra control and god does she deserve it. kakashi gets a clan! and sakura finds herself a family! and inner stays! listen. this shit has me SOBBING. she’s on the road to recovery and getting better everyday and my heart is WARM!! god im so happy this story has me happy stimming at some points ghuhg// warnings for child abuse, mentions of torture, attempted suicide, self harm, relapse, violence, blood, and mentions of eye trauma. there is an ongoing “sequel” with aus based in the early summer rain universe!

Learning Curve by ishiryoku

ship: sakura & team 7 // words: 50529 // chapter: 5/? // updated: 1/14/19

This is the life she chose: the path of the shinobi. It's either roll with the punches or be left behind by her team—and Sakura's not about to let them go off on their own.

starts off during the end of the wave arc. i love the self analyzing in the first chapter and also that wake up call. in a better (more sakura loving) universe this is that turning point that we shouldve gotten :( ALSO CAN I JUST AAA!!! all the little times kakashi is there to reassure her make me wanna fucking BAWL plus this is THE team as family fic i’ve been needing in my life aa GOD sakura just loves her team so muuucccchhh// the tags say mokuton sakura and fuuinjutsu naruto but it’s not there yet! (also naruto get bit, yikes) warnings for lots of dissociation, death, self loathing, paranoia, and trauma

Satori (Between the Lines) by jaylene

ship: none // words: 50665 // chapters: 12/? // updated: 3/3/18

While attending the Academy, Sakura's field experience assignment with the Konohagakure Intelligence Division ends up being more valuable than she'd ever guess.

another fic w/ the concept of interns and adults fostering the growth of ninja kids before they graduate! my girl is constantly flexing her smarts and im so proud! (torune is just a baby who deserved better than canon gave him :() and GOD i love ino!! and so does sakura and she just loves her friends a lot and people in general bc her baby heart is so filled with love and OOF// the aburame are SO interesting im thankful for the focus they get (and the focus on ciphers and T&I and ibiki!) god theyre all kids. just little babies :((( warnings for bullying and manipulation (however unintentional, it doesnt negate the harm caused)

Ties That Bind; Break by Igot2peedou

ship: shikasaku // words: 50931 // chapters: 17/25 // updated: 8/25/18

She severs their ties, decidingly, not because of Sasuke. Well. Not for the reason Ino suspects (but Sakura never clarifies, and that is lying by omission. isn't it?)

~~~

Sakura Haruno can’t help but feel. Not only her emotions but other peoples emotions. She is always prone to crying and for good reason— she can’t shut others emotions and must deal with her own and those closest to her (relationship wise.) Because a painfully tragic incident involving her father’s murder Sakura can no longer handle her “gift” and does the only thing that will stop her suffering.

She commits social suicide, and lets her best friend think she ended their friendship over a boy. This is her story....

au. set when sakura starts her rivalry w ino. sakura can sense emotions??? warning for death mention in first chapter and wow okay thats a lot. sasuke is traumatized and it takes out sakura and oof! this story is so so interesting,, shes stumbling her way through figuring out how her small clan’s blood line(?) works (how it’s more of a hassle than anything) also it gives her a really good disposition to genjutsu which she tries to get better in (she also had an earth affinity plus all of team 7 have a petty rivalry going on) sakura has trauma and goes hard in the exams. warnings for blood, gore, disembowelment, dismemberment, animal and human abuse/death, the rivalry between t7 is baaaaadd,, also disorienting plot twist in chapter 16!

Her Eyes Saw It All by ich_bin_ein_stern

ship: none // words: 63502 // chapters: 13/? // updated: 8/29/18

Sakura can’t recall much of the details regarding the mission in Wave, but what she does remember - there are scars left behind. The life she knows changes after this mission and, for better or worse, she accepts it and moves forward. She won’t allow herself to fall behind.

set during wave au. i love when characters continue to survive due to sheer instinct and pure stubborness. TEAM AS FAMILY!! theyre all so supportive of each other it makes my heart hurt (im soft serving it so hard. theyre SO nice to each other and theyre Actually friends and naruto and sasuke support sakura SO much it makes me cry) sncjf and the nara family is so fucking sweet also MOKUTON!! AND SHE HAS THREE AFFINITIES!!!!! (mokuton is changed here from a kekkei genkai to a learned skill tho) honestly it’s just what she deserves. also sakura is just SO level headed and smooth??? it’s really neat. warning for a healthy dose of death and gore in chp12, it picks up fast

In Death, Life by TeaFourTwo

ship: none // words: 136409 // chapters: 13/? // updated: 3/24/19

Only by reason of having died does one enter into life.

“Sakura. Just Sakura” Thats how they’d introduced her. She knew it was true, she was no longer a Haruno after all, but it didn’t stop the words from feeling like a dull knife in her side.

Or, Sakura goes to the Uchiha compound the night of the massacre and comes away an orphan with more questions than answers.

au starts when theyre babies!!! before ino nd sakura become rivals. baby sakura loves her friends a lot she didnt deserve that :((( super interesting bits tying sakura to the uzumaki?? sasuke.. :( .. sakura is traumatized and doesnt know who her family is and doesnt trust what people say to her (tenten is in the same orphanage as her! naruto too and i love him and i wanna personally hurt everyone who’s ever been mean to him) NARUTO AND SAKURA BEST FRIENDS!!! traitors are everywhere!! and the branch family get me feeling some type of way (can danzo choke.. fr…) the depth given to yin and yang chakra… ops mind…FUCK all the myths and spiritual stuff and how it’s all forgotten history?? UGH im in love/// (tsunade… mom..) warnings for the massacre, death, and blood

⭐Second Bite at the Cherry by Sakinthra

ship: none // words: 142249 // words: 41/? // updated: 3/25/19

There's been a storm brewing inside Sakura ever since Sasuke left to seek out Orochimaru, and the growing realization that she might not be half the shinobi her teammates are. She's always been the one that held back and let the boys finish the job, but it's clear she can't let herself be the weak one any longer. It's time to take her fate into her own hands...and it starts with breaking into a library.

set post sasuke rescue mission. i LOVE the introspection and worldbuilding im such a sucker for it// she gets to make rash and stupid decisions while still flexin her smarts and i am HERE for it!! she questions the state and adds skills to her arsenal (which is. tiny for a long time) shes smart and quick thinking but rash and impulsive so of course leaving the village and convincing ppl she went after sasuke is what she settles on (smh. her heart and heads in the right place bust smh) GAARA BBY I LOVE YOU SO VER MUCH (shukaku.....) (and fine.. i kinda love u too kakashi >:/) theyre a couple of dumb brats trying to help people (sai joins!!!!! his interactions w gaara especially are endearing) (hidan? is a prominent figure? i hate that hes one of my faves...... big fan of the depth given to his religion tho. it's super fascinating) BOIII NARUTO GETS DISILLUSIONED BY JIRAIYA AND GOES TO TSUNADE AND MY HEART IS BEATING OUT OF MY CHEST/// naruto's choice makes me wanna cry and sasukes little intermissions are pretty funny and get interesting (i support u karin!!) theyre dumb kids stumbling into politics and ending up going on a quest to save the world? the way all the pieces shift into place.. how the wheels start turning... the rest of the nine getting involved... poetic cinema.....warnings for death, blood, and decapitation

⭐Five Petals by PrecariousSauce

ship: sasusaku // words: 143900 // chapters: 22/? // updated: 2/6/19

Several things happen all at once in less than a minute’s time.

Sakura’s elbow slams into Sasuke’s side from an angle he doesn’t anticipate, sending him tumbling end over end off the branch.

Sasuke rights himself just a second too late and without checking where he’s going to land– When he does his knee twists, he feels a lightning bolt of pain shoot from his sole to his head, his leg gives out.

And Orochimaru’s teeth sink down to the gum in Sakura’s shoulder.

starts during chunin exams. timeline is followed pretty closely. fic is mostly centered around sasuke and from his perspective but sakura has the most pivotal change (:(). sasuke is cute, sakura is so in over her head, and naruto is naruto. sasuke loves his team a lot :(( and GOD i love when the kids act like kids even though that reminder hurts. sasuke takes up healing!! how cool is that!! AND TSUNADE IS SO FUCKING COOL I LOVE HER!!! and danzo should choke fr..... AND GOD DO I LOVE THE KONOHA 12//// warning for orochimaru, violence, death, and blood

⭐Hoshigaki by writer168

ship: none // words: 168116 // chapters: 32/? // updated: 3/10/19

When Sakura was three, her father told her he was a criminal. When she was seven, the last thing she saw of him was the sword on his back. When she was eight, she had a friend named Kiba. When they were twelve, they met Shino.

And when they were genin, they began to fight for the truth because they could no longer fight for the sake of Konoha.

au. sakura is kisame’s kid! kakuzu.. kinda sucks, konan is alright, pein is really dramatic, and sasori nd orochimaru are awful as per usual. kisame is just doing what he can to be a good dad :((( sakura is real smart and kiba is great and so is shino!! (ily baby) theyre all bestfriends and theyre all a little weird and i love them so much :’) theyre all manipulative little shits and i love them for it (and i love you too naruto) kurenai’s team develops dangerously (really starts to show in chapter 18) honestly this writing style really knows how to keep me absolutely enthralled (hiruzen and danzo.. i’ll kill you with my bare hands) i love kurenai and i love how much she cares abt her team :’( tenzo baby.. be there for them (same at you kotetsu) kisame is a good dad okay!! im not changing my mind on that! orochimaru can choke!!!!! team 8 is a family and theyre ride or die bc theyre really in some deep shit!!! i need the state dismantled and my kids are gonna do great. (bro im so fucking weak for all the world building and symbolism, GOD this fic is written so fucking amazingly) warning for young pregnancy, death, blood, gore, child endangerment, human experimentation, and eye gore/horror

LEFT UNFINISHED

Dirty Family Secrets by orphan_account

ship: none // words: 1431 // chapters: 1/?

Post-Sasuke defection to Orochimaru.

Something feels off about Sakura's parents, but before she can question them about it, they're both gone. She came from a family of civilians, there is no way both her parents were traitors, right?

Kakashi's Apprentice by Right2nowthen

ship: narusasusaku // words: 3440 // chapters: 1/1

In which Kakashi and Sakura hit the road and everything changes.

The Cherry Blossom Blooms Twice by Right2nowthen

ship: none // words: 3666 // chapters: 1/1

Who or what is Inner Sakura? As the fate of the world hinges on this question, Sakura seeks answers...

Today I Choose Joy by Nine_Stoic_Crayolas

ship: none // words: words: 5867 // chapters: 4/? // updated: 8/11/17

Sakura can See certain things. A story about a little girl, a couple of red eyes and Death.

The Company of Trees by theroadkillcafe

ship: none // words: 22646 // chapters: 5/? // updated: 6/7/17

Sakura is bullied, a dead kekkei genkai is reborn, and things go a little bit...differently.

Haruno Sakura and the Heuristic Method by MoofieLou

ship: inosaku // words: 41986 // chapters: 8/? // updated: 6/22/17

The flower that blooms last may catch the wildest wind of them all.

Alternatively: Sakura graduates from the academy, buys herself some anmitsu to celebrate, and arrives home to find her mother being beaten bloody by a thief. Things are different after that.

A heuristic method (/hjᵿˈrɪstᵻk/; Ancient Greek: εὑρίσκω, "find" or "discover"), often called simply a heuristic, is any approach to problem solving, learning, or discovery that employs a practical method not guaranteed to be optimal or perfect, but sufficient for the immediate goals.

set when the kids graduate. op retconned ino nd sakura rivalry and im thankful they stay best friends warning for violence in chapter 2. theres smthn i love abt blinding panic turned into survival instinct. sakura is prone to anger and i LOVE it!! also her family is fleshed out!! i love sakura so so much shes really snarky and smart (and she becomes kakashis fave! oof!!!) ggg team 7 getting along fills me with icky gooey love/// warnings for violence and blood. this fic hasnt updated in such a long time but it’s so so good and im hurt it left on a cliffhanger :((

Tempest by cywsaphyre

ship: none // words: 45233 // chapters: 6/? // updated: 7/20/12

Back in time and armed with years of future knowledge, Sakura is ready to take the world by storm. Except... she's four again, not twelve. Ah well, nobody said she couldn't start a little early. Gen, time travel, AU, Sakuracentric.

time travel fic but she baby! also oh FUCK my heart is melting naruto is baby and sakura wants her boys to be happy this time :’( and also ino is baby and i love her. GOD theyre all four years old and babies and sasuke is so cute and my heart huuuurrtss :’((((( my baby girl is so smart and she loves strongly and theyre all little brats acting like kids and im soft (team 10 feelings..) (and sakura is Literally preventing a massacre bc she fucking rules) MY TEAM SEVEN LOVE MUSCLES ARE FLEXING!! warning for mentions of trauma, mentions of kidnapping, blood, and death. this fic hasnt updated since 2012 though like.. *incomprehensible*

A Lot of Fight Left in Me by Stormwind13

ship: none // words: 73814 // chapters: 12/? // updated: 10/29/17

Sasuke deserted the village. Naruto is being taken away for his own safety. Sakura is left with the broken remains of her team and a teacher that's barely in the village, but she'll find a way to make this work. She has to, because all those lectures about teamwork had to mean something. Didn't they?

this fic hasnt updated in a while but it's so good :((( team 7 is in shambles and sakura just wants a teacher and to get better (i love iruka...) OH! and i love how close the konoha 12 are:) i love the little worldbuildy bits that give depth to the village. theres lots of ocs and a mini uzushio (that sakuras a part of!!) it's super interesting but hasnt updated since 2017 and i checked and this fic was the most recently updated fic op has :((((( it's still a good length and a great read but leaves at a cliffhanger which isnt as bad if you stop at the last break. warning for violence

#naruto #naruto shippuden #sakura #sakura haruno #pro sakura haruno #pro sakura #sakura centric #sakura haruno fics #fic recs #post #lol @ all the tags i put on this #im literally so in love with sakura as a character like. this is a love letter #HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY GIRL

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umbillicalnoose · 5 years

Note

i think that you would think im pretty and would like my poetry and i want to share it with you. im shy.

to be honest, im very apathetic these days. im not the nice “cutesy baby flower petal boy” i used to be. a lot has happened & im bitter & sullen & all in all, a pretty shitty friend/person to know. i used to possess some redeeming qualities, believe it or not, even if they were construed by the subconscious in an attempt to be likeable - a facade, even tho its only a facade, is still tangible, still there, is still something, even if not authentic. is poorer character forgivable in the name of presenting more authentically? but nah. that makes it sound like im putting effort into being a better person, which im not. im just sort of fried & done. its been a very long time since i played the role i built for myself on here of the “small fawn boy who wants to help girls” lmaooo. how embarrassing. altho, i was just a kid, & i guess, if you had a tumblr as a teenager, you went thru some cringe (i know the use of that word has fallen in on itself & adopted its own definition but for lack of a better one) ass phases, whether it was kinning or malingering mental illness or oh fucking christ, all that gender bullshit, etc etc. from what ive observed, tho, loosely following kids im still casually friends with that i met on here, i think we’ve all managed to Grow The Fuck Up, at least a little. most of us have jobs or r in school or have partners - growing up & moving on is a very surreal experience to watch/go thru. im moving at my own pace & ive accepted that - im still currently using & starving myself & concocting a suicide plan every day but at least i use clean needles as much as possible, i actively & honestly do strive for the bare minimum calorically, & um able to work with the mentality of “well ill have this when i need it but todays not that day” a lot more readily, in relation to suicide shit. ive finally found a therapist who Really Gets It, is a frontrunner internationally on ritual & extreme abuse & mind control. its pretty incredible what a few years with a good therapist can do. anyways. im sorry, i know you didnt ask for all this & im not even sure why i divulged. i guess, what tipped me off, was your attempt at sounsing “cute” - dude, cut that shit out, i promise youll be a lot better off. & i know everyone interchanges aspects of their personality based on who theyre talking to/who they percieve themselves to be talking to, but i feel like not a lot of people give enough credence to the internet & its hand in shaping/molding young people, kids, vulnerable dumbasses, especially tumblr (tho, i get that its a relatively new phenomenon) - u get a bunch of the “weird”, “alternative”, ““ostracized” kids together on a website, of course its gonna nurture a culture of hypervalidatoon & pretending to be sick in order to fit in to the point that its not an act anymore & exacerbation of symptoms & basically, just sucking each others dicks, sitting in ur own shit, & never ending coddling. & then, you have the older group of kids, who have played this game before but instead of helping or ignoring the Dumbshit kids, they indulge their own normally-buried-but-unleashed-by-internet-anonymity sadism/human instinct to just be fucking dicks & so now you have this vicious cycle of anger & hatred & fucking melodrama up the urethra. im sorry, i know im comig off as/am being harsh but god fuckin dammit yknow? also, this isnt directed at you, specifically, more of a generalized thing, @ myself included. so uh. i mean, if u still wanna share it with me after reading all this, id be happy to read ur poetry. i used to be over the top nice & then reverted to Major Asshole & am now trying to find that sweet middle spot - honoring & allowing myself to share my pain without putting it on others. which is really hard!! cuz becoming a Dick was difficult in that it forced me to be more honest with my true self & as such, more vulnerable - now in trying to become Kinda Nice again because despite being a pulsating scrotom, ive had the intense desire for friendship & human interaction, while simultaneously doing things that i was consciously aware was pushing others away - but then, if i pretend to be nice, where does that authenticity i worked for & was so scared of go? & i dont mean telling someone their new haircut looks nice even when it doesnt - thats just not being a dick. but i guess, those r the normal trials & tribulations of any relationship & adolescent developing identity. which is weird too - dealing with “normal” issues, i mean. whats the point if your life/limbs/breaking point arent at risk? whats the point when your best friends already dead. im sick of people calling "survivors” (despise that word, so fucking female-originated & overdramatic) “brave” & “strong” - surviving is not brave or strong. its just survival. you wouldnt call an animal brave for running for its life from a predator but you would call a dog courageous for going into a burning building to save its owner. premeditated action on the notion that you are probably going to be hurt is brave. being subjected to pain with no choice is not. theres no “silver lining” or anything “good” to be drawn from it either - sure it may have made x a more compassionate person or made y more introspective & gentle but you know what would have been even fucking better??? if the shit hadnt happened in the first place! let x be an asshole & y be self absorbed - the “benefits”, so to speak, do not outweigh the cost, not by a long fucking shot. its not only patronizing to hear garbage like that, but a slap in the face to know that anyone could possibly see anything good coming from that nightmare & that the characteristics, good or bad, you developed either in response to or as a result of, are worth praise. dont tell me im strong for doing what i had to to escape a torture chamber - tell me im perseverant for studying my ass off & passing that test last week. in the words of one of my dearest & most fucking brilliant friends, “pain doesnt owe me/you purpose - the need to intellectualize & assign meaning to pain & death is not only futile, but harmful.” & honestly, i think that it stems from weakness (in most cases - i realize theres a plethora of other reasons such as those who r just desperate for something to hold on to or r hyperintellectual & analytical or who have been pressured by external “support” systems to find the “good” etc etc) - while the majority of people view the person who “can find the good in everything” (strictly speaking only in relation to trauma/tragedy here & more in denunciation of those that celebrate this trait as opposed to vilifying “survivors” who respond this way, though in my experience, its very very very rarely the “survivor” that perpetrates this ideology ) as strong, i sort of see it as a weakness - their inability to sit with & absorb their own pain or that of others is so strong that not only do they have to frantically pull rainbows out of the teeth of a meat cleaver, they also have to exist within this strange (tho, not malicious - more subconscious) superiority complex. like, nah, dude, some times shit is just awful. you cant tell me anything fucking good came out of a four year old girl being kidnapped, gangraped, & tortured for two years, before being impaled & left to die on a stake. her mom opened a non profit organization? oh well thank fucking god for that!!! those that believe the latter to be more “enlightened” or whatever the fuck r the same people who say shit like “dying is easy - living is harder” & i get that that its supposed to be interpreted metaphorically for the most part - giving up is easy, trying isnt (which also.....isnt true??? admitting defeat & fully accepting the fact that ur fucking helpless is beyond hard lmao???) - but pretend youre somewhere, anywhere outside ur sunny little fucking yoga studio full of white women whos biggest issues r the pta & johnny whos failing math, & lets say your life is in real, imminent danger, a gun is to your head & i want you to not scream or cry or beg for ur life since dying is “easier”. if dying is so easy, why do the majority of ppl cling to it with such desperation - why is suicide illegal? why do some ppl go thru 100s of chemo treatments even tho the doctors say theyre just prolonging the inevitable, ppl who cut off a diseased arm so it wont spread, those who walk dozens of miles every day for food & water, etc? & i know & understand the survival instinct better than anyone, even when i wanted to die more than anything, my natural instincts would kick in with no conscious neural input & id do what i had to do. im not condemning those who cling to life (ok - a little. ur wasting resources out of ur own fear. but i also realize thats just me being a Fucking Asshole As Always cuz technically, im doing the same thing tho its more due to lack of opportunity rather than fear. i just think, societally, death should be more normalized, discussed, & not made out to be so unknown & scary), instead just reprimanding those who say shit like that (inspirational facebook quotes). especially cuz most of the ppl who do spew that shit have never gone thru anything even remotely difficult - their worst nightmare is a Big Scary Black Man grabbing them on the street, mugging them, & touching their tits. & i also know that these stupid ass sayings are to be applied to bullshit like exercise & fitness (“no pain no gain” is another one of my Favorites) & not fucking torture or even just ur run of the mill rape, even that would probably smash the rose tinted banana republic shades off their beverly hills tanned faces. but ive heard the no pain no gain one a handful of times in the last few weeks, specifically from doctors performing procedures in preparation for my bottom surgery. & i know its supposed to be encouraging & they have no way of knowing, but its just like, buddy, u have no idea who youre fucking talking to. & im starting to understand what THEY mean when they say it - pain with a reward is infinitely more tolerable than pain just for the sake of pain; like, a tattoo, it hurts, but u know, when its done, its gonna be sick as fuck. when u r able to fall back on the idea that its for something u rlly want, its A Lot easier to handle as opposed to pain thats Just Pain - theres no reward for it except, i guess, that the more u experience it, the closer u r to the end of it lmao. i mean, i still hate when ppl say it cuz for most of my life, pain was just pain, & the “reward” was the opportunity to go home at the end & so whenever ppl say that, my mind just immediately resorts back to that & im just like haha fuck u. but im trying to remember my experiences r definitely not universal & im starting to sorta understand what they mean i think. but, flipping gears here, & going back to the sentiment of “everything happens for a reason”, the base philosophy of psuedo deep Fuckwads - a girls dad didnt fuck her “for a reason”, everything doesnt happen “for a reason”. like ok, hypothetically, the kid he impregnated her with & that she was forced to have at 12 may surpass all odds & not become a homeless junkie & instead become a world renowned doctor who finds the cure for cancer. but she wasnt raped repeatedly from the age of six for that “reason”, no matter what anyone says & honestly, the liberation of the masses does not justify the suffering of one, especially a child. in my eyes at least. but again, im a bitter asshole. sorry i just Went The Fuck Off here oh my god.....if u read all this, thanks, pal. if not, thats cool too. but yea, send me ur stuff, id totally be down to read it. as for me potentially thinking ur cute, i have to look at my disgusting shitstain of a “face” every goddamn day so everyone else to me is fuckin aphrodite. but im also tryin to not put so much worth into physical appearance- its not something that should be complimented cuz its just smth a person was born with which is the same reason it shouldnt be insulted. this is gonna sound gay & stupid but i personally find that a persons essence & personality really permeates. you can meet someone who, objectively, isnt all that great looking, but once u get to know them, u really see their beauty - how the sun catches in their hair, their dilated pupils looking up at u from under long eyelashes in the dark, the birthmark on their right shoulder that they despise but that is so Them, the gap in their teeth, etc. & idk how to phrase this without it sounding like “well ur ugly but at least ur a good person”, cuz that only reiterates the societally indoctrinated emphasis on appearance & my kneejerk reaction to assure the person in question that thats not what im saying is only another result of that!!! its inescapable!!! but no, really, its not just a matter of “its on the inside that counts” - physically, they change or maybe, actually this is more likely, when i first meet them, my “default” eyes r just looking for features that i know im immediately attracted to (tall, blonde, sickly as in sunken eyes sticklike pale but still looks like she could & will beat the shit out of me) but as i fall in love or get to know them better, my eyes adjust & i notice & adore the beauty that was there all along. so uh. idk if ill think ur “cute”. but probably, yes, ill think ur an angel.

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kendrixtermina · 5 years

Text

Someone finally uploaded a Kingdom Route run with everyone recruited!

So imma be doing a bit of reacting

Kingdom!Ignatz works a bit like Empire!Felix - He wanted to go his own way unlike what his parents said and is thus following Byleth. In this case it’s of course somewhat less angsty ‘cause the Victors have the means to flee if necessary, unlike Rodrigue who was a prominent leader of the kingdom side of things

In an interesting parallel to how half the cast abandons the kingdom cause it’s a sinking shipload of kamikaze, on the other routes, Raphael complains about the instability and confusing politics of the alliance and how she should probably grab Maya and his grandfather and get them to Garreg Magh. I suppose a lot of people without connections or political accumen must feel this way. the monastery IS light javelin proof, so yeah...Raphael isn’t salty toward Claude himself tho. Then again he has little capacity for salt and in his paralogue it’s kinda shown that he makes a deliberate choice to live a low-salt lifestyle its not just obliviousness, he actively doesnt want grudges or awkwardness in his life

Leonie is also here to babysit Byleth and tells them not to let Dimitri push them around

Hilda: “The Monastery is a mess. So is Dimitri. I’m only here because Byleth is competent and Holst is annoying“

Dorothea and Bernie have so far gotten identical dialogues to the church route

Lysithea is interesting and kinda morally ambiguous. She says outright that she cares nothing for the kingdom or anything other than a peaceful life for her parents. She wants to get at the slitherers for her own revenge and they’re in the empire so she finds Dimitri’s revenge obsession convenient. Also very ironic cause, are she and Edelgard gonna fight each other because they both want to get at Thales? Very interesting bc vanilla BL doesn’t adress the slitherers that much - of course Lysithea says she has beef with “the empire” and doesn’t elaborate. At the same time Lysithea is MUCH more logical and self aware than most of the kingdom crew bar Sylvain so yeah

actually, Lysithea, like Felix, has TONS of route specific dialogue. I guess the devs expected those two to get recruited a lot since they are just flat out the strongest students apart from the house leaders.

The Kingdom is arguably just as infiltrated but Lysithea doesn’t know... and at this point Cornelia’s cooperating with the Empire anyways

General trend of the Alliance recruitees not being all that attached to the Alliance as they hardly knew each other at the start and half of them had nothing to do with politics

Nothing to do with the recruitees, but so THATS what happens if you propose to go to Fhirdiad first. Dimitri is like “You’re supposed to lead the church! Go rescue Rhea!” ...he doesn’t know the whole thing with Byleth being experimented on by Rhea (neither does Byleth at this point) but it is kinda low. Mitya you have no leg to stand on here indeed the main reason I was sympathetic to you last playthrough is that you never ASKED Gilbert & co to put you on the throne and made clear that you’re not interested in that... so following you was on them to an extent. but you don’t get to say “Do your Bishop job” (that Byleth never asked for) if you’re not doing your job cause you’re too busy doing your kamikaze raid. Then again he’s probably too emotional and just plain done with everything rn to see the contradiction/look at this with perspective he’s probably physically incapable of chilling out rn

It just ends with Byleth doing a pointed sadface. daamn Mitya don’t be mean to By-By she still believes in you dude : ( Though it makes sense he’s big on obligation he’s doing this revenge trip because he feels he must. So it’s more a distortion than it really is a contradiction, as far as he’s concerned he IS doing his duty...to the fallen. I guess if you can’t handle him at his “Go be a bishop or something” you don’t deserve him at his “my beloved~”

Still hurts a bit tho. Especially when Claude, though not without his own agenda, was distinctly a good friend on the topic, “Teach you’re in charge now be more confident~ the church doesnt run you, you run the church”

Before Aillel Dorothea says something about the Kingdom people also looking undecided of where to march, but she also wonders if some fighting/ victory will quell uncertainty

Also she and mercie are standing next to each other! Ive said before that it’s weird how they don’t rly have a support though they are the two most popular extroverted ppl on the campus... they GOTTA know each other at least on a smalltalk basis

Alois is like “These kingdom ppl dont seem to know what they want... but hey this allow YOU to shine as a leader”... so basically Byleth is running this show but for all that they’re a good field commander and decisive when it comes to immadiate practical problems, as far as big picture direction goes, well, Sothis’ “boulder” quote comes to mind. They just never had big attachments on convictions, the Felix support chain is also salient here. They kinda just did whatever job they were given until they found a bigger cause/purpose after throwing in their lot with one of the lords or the remaining saints.

I wondered how this would play out as the Kingdom route is very kingdom-specific, whereas Claude, Edelgard and the church all have an universal cause for people to get behind. I guess how this plays out is that before Dimitri’s turnaroud there’s the kingdom faction and the Byleth faction and Byleth is kinda trying to run the show as they think Dimitri would if he were at his best

Caspar is still on the more unphazed side but also substantially more phazed than on the church or GD routes, he wasn’t particularly close to Randolph but he’s not unaffected by Dimitri going a tad over the top here - he also has the takeaway that Dimitri probably never trusted him much since he was born in the empire.

Sylvain actually alledges something about Dimitri not socializing much with any Adrestians even back in the academy days if you recruit him on CF so this does not come out of nowhere. Also kinda makes me wish they had a support - theyre both naturals at smashing things but they have very different attitudes towards it. then again i suppose it would go alot like the raphael one

Ferdie recognizes Myrrdin is a strategically better location but as Aegir territory is closeby he wishes we could have invaded through there so he could take it back... Would the citizens want him back tho? After the war its a no-brainer cause he helped end it, the peasants arent going to complain about too much peace and prosperity nor are they gonna feel nostalgic about anyone who started a war with their tax money and then lost it, but if he waltzed into an area that had thus far been far from the frontlines, following his fathers’s exploitative management and 5 years of semi equal rights under edelgard? he might have been welcomed with pitchforks, through no fault of his own.

He says something implying hed like to come rescue his relatives implying that some of them are still alive. of course the pm deserves all Edelgard threw at him and then some, but id be curious about Ferdie’s other relatives. His mom probably looks just like him, because he sure didnt get the looks from his dad... or anything else really, apart from the crest and hair color. - though i think the a support with bernadetta implies that shes no longer around

Lorenz bitterly remarking that of course Claude and his dad eventually made peace since they both only serve their own interests. (”So long as their interests are in allignment they will continue to cooperate”) Says the guy we just rescued from his endeavors in turncoatery. Lorenz you’re pretty opportunistic too, and as for your redeeming features Claude has those too - but of course you’ll never find out in this one. Still, it shows that he’s painfully aware that his father - whom he would have died protecting if we hadn’t spared him - is a villain and a hack

Claude isn’t super trusting and knows that he gets percieved as shifty so he promises people to get them theirs so that they support him out of self interest. No need to take a chace. Of course by the end of this route he WILL take big chance on Dimitri

That says Lorenz is not SO biased that he can’t tell that Claude might be interested in working with the kingdom army

Lysithea (who surprisingly has TONS of unique dialogue here, and I like that it’s a complex mature plot) is having her doubts and not trusting Dimitri for all that she finds him an useful idiot. By and large you get the sense that many consider Byleth the leader of this operation, she’s glad that Byleth is there to issue sensible orders. She tells Byleth not to tell anyone and worries about what will happen once the empire’s vanquished. No faith in team Kingdom... at all. Understandable of course

Hilda’s dialogue is largely the same as in the church route and at times kinda the same in all routes but I like how she’s like “Claude might’ve looked like a lazy bum but he’s smart! If he says he’s on our side he will defs help!” before the gronder fiasco

A lot of NPCs stir the suspicion here so it stands out how much she totally trusts him like hes any other friend

As with the other routes with the recruitees you get an idea of what’s going on in the other territories such as Lysithea deducing that Judith must be backing Claude in his gambit

One moment you think Lorenz is going to add some somber insightful commentary to the sincerity of Claude’s offer but then he’s like, “Granted Dimitri is much improved. He must be asking us for help cause he trusts ME” XD Like... no friend. You’re almost right but if there’s anyone here he was faith in its Byleth. And then he’s even like, “Well no choice but to save poor Claudesy” On the one hand it shows that there not just pure hate there on the other... lulz.

apparently one of the first things Dimitri did after getting his act together post gronder is profusely apologize to Caspar for that ugly business with Randolph. Thats a worthwhile detail and i want fanfic of it. Caspar being Caspar he wasnt really keeping a grudge, they’re a warrior clan and they were at war

They had to move out so quickly that Hilda had no time to go shopping in Fhirdiad #Priorities XD

Meanwhile Ignatz, like a normal person, hopes his folks will be safe

hilda does eventually remember to maybe save her folks and claude but only after making Byleth promise to go on a shopping trip with her. Someone should probably write that fanfic

Someone told me that Ferdinand had some prominent critical lines but it was really just one, and it’s as I suspected actually just a variant of the same “a king can’t be emotional” line he gets in all the routes, this time with the addendum that if he turned around and decided to go rescue the capital, he might be capable of reason/being a decent leader after all. granted I guess compared to how most of the Kingdom people go along with everything it comes off critical? IDK.

Lysithea misses Rodrigue :(

Lorenz and Ignatz standing next to each other was a nice touch they have a fairly wholesome friendship

Leonie’s just glad that ol’ Mitya is “back to normal” especially since she’s pretty sure that they don’t have enough soldiers to get to Fort Merceus let alone Enbarr

For obvious reasons, Petra is pretty sympathetic about the whole “retaking Fhirdiad” thing

Seeing Seteth and Catherine so certain that Rhea would want them to save the people of Fhirdiad first when you know that she wouldn’t hesitate to set the place on fire is just...OUCH. Though it does show the goodness in Seteth and Catherine themselves.

Manuela wishes she could’ve moved her informary to gronder and save a few more peeps :(

It seems like to Leonie, Dimitri will always be just “Dimitri”, King or not. Figures she aaaaalmost adressed even Byleth by name XD You really DO get the sense that he interacted alot with the recruitees

All the house leaders shouldve had more supports.

If you grabbed hanneman he’ll give you some extra backstory on Cornelia - apparently she was originally from the empire and an eminent scholar whose great work Hanneman was vaguely aware of. I would assume that was still the real cornelia. Judging by the timing it sounds like she might’ve smuggled Patricia out of Adrestia. Assuming both were still original at this point this might present a possibility for why she trusted/vouched for cornelia without being complicit / lend itself to a “she was duped” reading

But it’s still suspicious that she would end up courting the second most powerful man in the land right after number one.

Some had suggested that Cornelia caused the plague in the first place but the thing is there was a perfectly credible “mundane” explanation for it (the city’s sewers not being up to date technologically) that theres no reason to doubt

Assuming that all the replacements occurred 14 years before part one when Arundel stopped his donations/ thins being about the time when Cornelia’s personality was noted to have changed completely, that would mean both the “fixing the severs” thing and the soppy story about how Edelgards’ parents met would be real

AAAA everything to do with patricia is just so ambiguous - if they were longtime friends wouldn’t she have noticed something “off”? Same with her brother actually. Lambert had his own country so its not like there was no one to protect her.

Ahhh THIS is how lorenz gets iinto the midset for that prissy, hes pissed that Claude dissolved the Alliance and misses it XD

you DO get to call him out for being a turncoat himself tho. particularly hilarious since Byleth just blinks and asks a casual question there

He immediately changes his tune

oh lorenz dear, i love you but you, sir, are WEAK xD

Lysithea as always calls everything and notes how suspicious arundel was alluding to the hrym nightmare also mentioned in her paralogue

She also mentions that he was said to be good and just at one point suggesting that there was a real Volkhard von Arundel at some point.

if the replacement took place when those donations ceased then Edelgard and Dimitri were 3, 14 years before part 1. Early enough that this could be around the time Patricia left enbarr, if this is when it happened then the romantic tower story might be real assuming that the Arundels were replaced at the same time - whatever arrived in Faerghus recomended patricia for a job so it probably had already happened by then

Its all so ambiguos tho we can only speculate there are so many possibilities

Ignatz marvels at how Claude managed to minimize damage to Alliance lands throughout the war, as in CF only Deirdru itself got particularly thrashed. Ignatz’ folks are safe and sound! Leave it to him to wonder where Claude might have absconded to. He was always one of the insightful ones but not in the same way as the other clever ones. More intuitive I guess. Cant remember if it was indentical to what you get if you spare Claude on CF (Cue the lets player remarking that Claude is probably stuck in a washing machine somewhere... he hadn’t cleared the Alliance route at that point)

Lol HILDA “And then the whole Alliance descended into chaos...” or actually she is surprised that that DIDNT happen and how orderly Claude managed the dissolution. “But I Guess we’re screwed if Dimitri turns out to be a crazed despot... he’s not gonna go crazy again is he?” You of little faith XD But she says all this in her usual cheery nonserious voice like

this chapter has a lot of unique dialogue actually

Linhardt impressed that anyone would have the guts to attack Fort Merceus directly and suggests looking for weak spots in the old walls

He shows up guarding it in SS and Vw doesn’t he? Guess he was visiting Caspar or something - or would have been familiar with the place from visiting the Bergliez clan in the past.

Ferdinand is wowed by Claude bowing out giving him kudos for caring about the peoples wishes. He thinks Edelgard ought to quit at this point and he’s alot harsher on her here than in any of the other routes. (”Not reveryone with noble blood has noble ideals” - Coming from Ferdinand that’s an accusation ) Interestingly at this point hes sticking with Dimitri cause post character developement, lots of ordinary ppl support him at this point and hes popular with the crowds. He’s wholly on the Savior King bandwagon, and maybe that’s why he’s harsher. He’s partial. Says something about him actually, largely good things when you think about it. Dimitri is probably the closest to what Ferdinand’s (and Lorenz’) own beliefs were. He likes the existing order and living in a fancy palace but he thinks the rulers should serve the people.

Its kinda ironic and sad because in ALL the other routes he clearly thinks Dimitri is an idiot and a bad ruler, and says he should be more composed and objective. But Dimitri wasnt at his best there now was he?

now ill be sad everytime I get to those “Ferdinand disses Dimitri” lines. They couldve been buds!

but i dont see this happening in any other route. According to something Sylvain says in cf Dimitri avoided ppl from the empire at the academy so they wouldnt have cozied up pre-timeskip, and its only the version of Dimitri who has his shit together which appeals to Ferdie as a leader.

really torn here on the one hand its a nice synergy to see lorenz and especially Ferdinand (who is waaay less arroganz than lorenz) sort of getting to win on their own terms with a ruler that jives with them and their Lawful Good fantasy classic thing. It’s not just a status quo thing its a protectors of the people thing. It’s heroic. On the other hand it feels like they’re stagnating when they could have had growth. This is basically the same Lorenz and the same Ferdinand we first met except slightly more mature. Notably lorenz is the same in the church route whereas Ferdie isnt as he still ends up rebelling fleeing and fighting against the empire. It helps that he practically winds up leading the remaining Eagles, albeit under Byleth and Seteth.

He still gets that line about being kinda sad to see the empire go though he knows there must be an end to the chaos, i think a few lines are different, so, not wholly without doubt

Shamir muses about hoe the three countries were once one and the same, but wonders that even if we put fodlan togethere theres no guarantee that it wouldnt come apart again. i mean there isnt, and wether thats a bad thing would depend a lot on the circumstances but its also possible that theyll get used to being one and forget they wrere ever separate. no one controls the far future... and should they? After all its always possible that someone in the future will have unforseeable circumstances or better ideas

Caspar sighs with relief that they didn’t have to fight his dad, last second worry about him turning up in the capital nonwithstanding... right does he get to live in this? Carpar wonders what’ll happen to him if they win, but he’s not holding down Faerghus so he might not have died the way he did in Silver Snow and Verdant Wind. It’s at least possible that he was captured alive and pardoned somehow.

Marianne’s adoptive dad sure smelled which way the wind was blowing; He was supporting Claude’s strategy to get the Cloucesters back under controll but sent Marianne to curry favor with the kingdom. Make friends with whoever wins I suppose. Ambitious politician indeed.

When she doesnt her from him in a while she wonders if he forgot about her but says she wouldnt mind that much because at least she wouldnt have to do any more politics? I distinctly recall that in gd there was something about how they got along better after the timeskip. Sigh.

she is real glad that Dimitri and claude ended up cooperating in the end

So does Dorothea but then she makes herself sad wishing that Edelgard was also there :( Me too friend, me too. I think thats the one unique line she gets this route. I like how it’s consistent in the church route she’s also the one who feels the most sad about betraying her, they were pretty close pre timrskip

as far as leonies concerned Dimitri is still just Dimitri even after taking back his kingdom. i like to think hed appreciate that. its also very typical of leonie. as with the “Caspar gets an apology” thing plenty of the recruitees get lines hinting that theres been more personal interaction between them and dimitri, kinda goes with how ppl in his own house follow him more out of personal loyalty than because they follow his plans like with the other two. hes kinda a very approachable sort of leader, makes the decisions with the group or follows whatever gilbert and Byleth decide, in the other routes theres always a distinct inner circle. Its cool how they incorporated the recruitees into that dynamic.

Petra is dissapointed that they DIDNT do a sneak attack on fort Merceus contrasting her usual line about how she likes sneak attacks. Dimitri naps both that an Enbarr head on doesn’t he? The Church has a smaller Army full of peeps who would rather not destroy Enbarr, and Claude agrees with Petra on the sneak attack thing and then Edelgard did that sorta shady but largely very gutsy thing where she didn’t sound the evacuation to restrict Claude’s movements knowing that there was zero danger that he would plow through the civilians (they don’t do this here cause last time they met Dimitri he was not feeling merciful indeed judging by huberts welcome lines and engage quotes he doesnt buy the turnaround), the AM ending narration also suggests that Enbarr wasn’t rebuilt, though Dimitri gave distinct “No pillaging!” orders, so they probably just couldn’t avoid wrecking the buildings and relocated the citizens.

Ashe also speculates where Claude went. That’s one of the things i like about Ashe he consistently averts out of sight out of mind I particularly always loved how he consistently worried about Dedue. Someone ought to.

Ingrid interestingly changed her tune here / kinda speaks positively of claude here - in CF she was like “I always though he was creepy”

Then again that was before fighting him I don’t recall If those two dont get the same lines if you spare Claude, have to go back and check

id like to mention that the lets player put lorenz in the pyjamas/loungewear the whole time as “punishment” for being late to the reunion and poked fun at him throughout.

#fe3h #fire emblem: three houses #fire emblem three houses

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papers4me · 3 years

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Fruits Basket, Se03. ep 6.(Part 1)

The main female protagonist who, has been the “mother /psychiatrist/ fixer/curse-breaker” for 57 eps & 2 seasons, has finally had her own “I’m a real person with my own issues” ep !!!! YESS! So happy!!! also, so underwhelmed. Tohru has been painted to be this utterly selfless & altruistic character for long, that when she’s finally a balanced character it’s presented in half an episode? Don’t get me wrong, I like the ep, but there’s also the same feeling of bullet train that I felt in momiji’s ep! ugh!! I hated that feeling! Go away~ oh well.. I’ll quickly state what I didn’t like, before jumping into what I liked, in order to end with a happier note~

What I didn’t like:

Tohru’s monologue after leaving shigure & Isuzu felt more like a background exposition more than a true character’s thoughts. The reason is that It is quickly narrated with quick flashbacks from the past with intentional pieces missing from the flashback. Pieces like” how did Kyoko hurt tohru? She said to kyo, in se02, ep “ I feel like I’ve only caused her sadness” & tohru’s flashbacks in se02 of her mother leaving/ closing a door. All these things not included in tohru’s 1st ever personal monologue made it seem like quick fill in for the audience more than tohru’s main struggle. Compare it to Yuki’s 3 ep monologue in se02, filled with all his own background info, hence, we as audience sit back & just feel. With tohru a little brain work is needed of putting things together in the puzzle is needed because NOTHING abt her trauma has ever been explained to us prior to her monologue . Also, compare this kyo. A character who ONLY have 2 eps dedicated to him in 57 eps, yet even without monologues & with hidden secrets for climax purposes, his emotions are clear cuz his background was explained early in se01, ep24 & se02, ep9. Compared to them both, her monologue felt a bit lacking.

What’s up with the following scene? Her crying & kyo comforting her mid-street. He saw her crying, asked what’s wrong & she couldn’t say & he gave her a comforting advice. All good. Kyo always give the most needed advice for tohru to be herself & feel comforted. Se01, “complain more, be selfish” Se02, somen table scene & asking her abt her future plans & the hiro incident. Kyo has tried to guess whats wrong first. Here he saw her cry in the middle of the street & just gave her an advice? couldn’t he at least guess wrongly if it is her granpa? school? anything? This scene is AMAZING but it feels off a little.

Kyo’s “ now I remember” EXCUSE ME?????? se01, ep14, valentine ep, he got a nightmare, then when shigure talked to him, we saw a quick flashback that we didn’t now what it is but now it IS kyoko. se02, the entirety of ep9 & the “ I won’t forgive you” & the flashback of young him with kyoko talking abt tohru. se02, ep 22 his fight with yuki & the clear face of kyoko telling him abt something regarding the hat. His entire shutdown of tohru IS abt kyoko NOT abt him being a monster cuz tohru accepted monster kyo in se01 ep 24! so.. REMEMBER WHAT????? the accident?? I feel like being hit with a rock. I mean, it makes sense that kyo will get PTSD after seeing the hat, cuz he remembers the bloody accident vividly. But it is the dialogue that IS weird. “ I remember” ?? it makes no sense? unless it is another hidden secret & will be revealed later. If so, then forget this point.

Kagura (more on her below). Now, let’s talk abt what I liked!

-Grief (the most difficult theme to express in literature): Excellent writing!

Grief is one of the most diverse human emotions. ppl who grief a loved one either erase everything abt them in order to cope with the pain of loss & live on, or drastically engrave everything, not want any memory to slip away, or hold the deceased on a pedestal, or hate them irrationally in order to forget abt them, some deny that the loved one is gone, others talk to them daily, some act & live normally for years & suddenly it hits them that this loved person is truly gone & they breakdown. Others, direct their disbelief of losing a precious one into the envy that other bad ppl are still living, why my precious one is dead?. Thats why, it is a difficulty emotion to understand by others. Ppl watching you will always think that comforting you is enough & that the longer you take, the more impatient they are with you. Tell me, watching tohru this ep, didn’t you feel that:

Come on. tohru, you can love your mom & kyo! who says only ONE person can be your precious?

Umm, why she cries for her mom NOW? 2 years after her death? Is she over it already?

Tohru~~ your mom aint going no where cuz you loved a guy? she’s in your heart, girl. Ugh!

Compared to yuki who was abused by his parents & kyo whose mom commit suicide in front of him, tohru’s trauma is meh~

Feeling this way abt tohru is exactly how many feel abt ppl struggling with grief. You are NOT a bad person if you felt this way. It means that thankfully you weren’t struck by grief to tohru’s extent or that your grief went about differently than tohru. Grief is a crippling feeling. It is valid, strong, overwhelming, paralyzing & above all very unique to the person themselves. Tohru feeling that her mom is slipping away from her memory is so realistic & utterly heartbreaking. Grief hurts & moving on from grief hurts more!!!! The more you go on & live your life, the more you feel like you betray your loved one.

Tohru’s entire existence is for her mother & so her mother LIVES inside her:

Finishing high school cuz it’s her mother’s request.

Getting a job to sustain herself cuz she has no one to support her financially.

Giving her mom’s wisdom & teachings abt life to others.

imitating her dad’s speaking style to prevent her mom from “leaving”.

Being the perfect girl in order to portray that her mom, who is a gangster & is hinted by the ugly relatives to be unfaithful to her husband due to tohru not taking after her dad, actually raised a respectful girl!

Talking to a dead cold lifeless picture as if it is a living human being & going into panic attacks when she looses such pictures.

Suppressing all her true “ ugly, negative” emotions & only giving the fake smiles & positive attitude.

She fears that ppl will leave her if she isn’t “comforting, happy”, hence, the whole facade of “ i’m okay, I’m okay”.

Immersing her self in ppl’s issues so she won’t face her own feelings of utter loneliness, fear of the future, & being left behind when everybody moves on with their lives.

Thinking that having selfish desires contradicts the “ hopeful, kind” girl images, hence, the fear to actually wants sth for herself. Everything HAS TO BE for the sake of the others.

Tohru is deeply traumatized & her complex, unhealthy but extremely realistic attachment to her mom must be broken. Tohru must learn to LET GO.

-Kagura’s character’s assassination. aka (violence heals y’all!)

The show wanted to express the emotion that kagura is still in love with kyo, but is learning to let go & accepting kyo/tohru love. I love that. Her speech with kazuma abt not being able to face tohru cuz her face will show her emotions is so relatable & it hit ME personally. Loved that. Then, she learns that tohru truly loves kyo & should confess to him not talk to Isuzu & I get that, it make sense that she lashes on thru & teach her the value of being open abt your feelings & dont loose him. all cool & understandable. BUT:

How dare you slap tohru like that? you don’t know what she’s going through? tohru is wearing funeral clothes for God’s sake! she just visited her dead mom, you insensitive woman! How dare you assume that all tohru is struggling with is love love, romance romance yay~ confess, kiss, be happy?

Tohru & kyo’s issues are deeper than typical, normal, shallow shojo love. It is related to child trauma & abuse. To their own individual identity & self-image! Their romantic love is meant to guide them towards better choices for the future, not magically heal everything. Their mutual love is NOT the answer to their issues.

How dare you slap someone to make them go back to their senses? this is such an anime move! ugh!~ it cheapens the emotional weight of character’s emotions.

“ I’m not apologizing to tohru. We communicate thro fists” excuse me? you arent even communicating with kyo thro fists! he sees you & run! the only time he thanked you for, was when you didn’t “ communicate thro fists” & played with him as a child! Not only make her hit tohru but not apologize??

No one told her off? are you foreal?? Isuzu pouting lips is no match for Isuzu powerful emotions when she’s embarrassed, & kazuma! where you at? Happy at the “ open confrontation”? Why do you kill kagura’s character like that?

Side Notes:

I hate how this went by in half an ep like they did with machi!! tohru is THE main character for God’s sake! But it looks like the show is not so fond of the true tohru who wants stuff & screams & talks to herself, alas she isn’t the angelic, innocent girl that is saturating the heck out of all shojo amines. Oh well~ perhaps tohru’s issues will be visited again in the finale?

Kyo gets PTSD reaction in front of tohru. great. Now what’s next? I won’t ever forgive the anime if next ep, kyo & tohru are all normal or worse the episodic theme prevents the continuation & jumps elsewhere. Nearly all the eps that didn’t end with a happy note, started the next ep somewhere & totally forgot the cliff hanger. such as, Isuzu’s ep in se02, it ended with tohru’s nightmare & next ep started yuki’s issues with tohru all smiley & bright. Another example, the Cinderella play ended with kyo/tohru torn symbolism where each is awkward with the other, next ep machi !!!!!! & kyo/ tohru all normal in kazuma’s house. But this time, it will be an epic mistake to do the same. Kyo going full traumatic in front of tohru to the point of her screaming is not sth you skip & start over erasing. Don’t disappoint me show! you can’t screw that, can you?

I love the symbolism of kyoko disappearing from the picture & the crack of her framed pic at the end with it still continued in he ED. Good job.

They are building for a hug clashing scene between kyo & tohtu. it must hurt. It is designed to hurt. I wanted it to hurt. It is not abt romance. It is abt mental & emotional trauma. I’m excited. But I’m scared. After today’s ep, I can confidently say I don’t trust the director. I’m an anime-only, but tohru’s part in the story is the least touched upon, the quickest to get over with & has the wackiest animation. They just don’t know how to depict an emotional tohru~ sigh~

Tohru is written to be a unique protagonist in the sea of innocent, selfless & always happy shojo heroine & opposed to the badass, physically strong female protag in shonen. She is the most realistic, but so much of her potential is wasted so far~~

“ saving the sohma’s. breaking the curse for others is a lie, in reality I wanted to do it for kyo” This line is supposed to be liberating for tohru cuz for once she is putting herself FIRST! It is not abt kyo. It is abt herself! it is cuz SHE wants him. See the difference? See how this line gives tohru the biggest character development!! but still sth is missing. I duno..

I have lots to say abt tohru, kyo, shigure, the grandpa, kyoko, Isuzu & even kazuma! I’ll do that in part 2.

I still liked the ep tho. It is solid. I”ll like it MORE if they continued from here & didn’t cut it cold.

#Fruits Basket #Anime Only #Exhausted paper #final season #Tohru Honda

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