What would Idri consider her biggest mistake? Her biggest triumph?

"Gnomes don't make mistakes, we learn lessons. That said, one thing I've learned is that drinking heavily and juggling with both fire and a guy big enough to juggle you... don't mix."

Her biggest personal triumph, in her opinion, was pulling off a disappearing tiger act as a grand finale! It's a big illusion with a lot of technical requirements, so even once you've got everything you need to do it you're still really limited by whether you can get a good venue, and she had to coordinate with the circus' resident beastmaster to a) borrow a tiger and b) time her act so it didn't overlap with his; because the circus is a traveling show and the act is so complicated to be able to even attempt, she only got to do it once before leaving the circus for adventuring, but it was a huge showstopper and she's still really proud of it (she designed most of the illusion herself, including a lot of the actual mechanisms for the necessary gimmicked props).

Otherwise, she'd launch into enthusiastically describing the greatest triumphs of her party as a group-- but, unable to make up her mind about what might count as The Single Greatest, each tale of adventure would lead into another, all recounted with the same level of both showmanship and sincere enthusiasm

But It’s a Really Long Song  Chapter 7: Lacie Hart and Evelyn Huffman: Confessions in a Small Red Car

Lacie Hart was best friends with Evelyn Huffman. They did everything together! Even if one of them didn’t like whatever they did, they did it together nonetheless.

Lacie didn’t particularly care for soccer, but she played it for Evelyn, Evelyn didn’t really like track and field per se, but she did it for Lacie. That was just how their friendship was. If one of them did something, the other was soon to follow in their footsteps.

Luckily, both of them enjoyed basketball, so when the time finally came for the first practice, they both got into Lacie’s small red car and sang at the top of their lungs together as they sped down the road towards Johnathan High.

“You ‘cited Evie?” Lacie asked with a knowing glint to her grin as the song faded out. Evelyn turned the aux down, and smiled brightly at Lacie.

“Yeah! I wonder who all will be there.” Evelyn pushed back a lock of warm brown hair and tucked it behind her ear. Lacie seemed to be in thought for a moment, eyes still carefully trained on the road as she did so.

“Well, Mayu and Jaqueline, obviously.” Lacie started and Evelyn nodded her assent. Yeah, you couldn’t go to Johnathan High and not know that those two were on the basketball team. Those two loved basketball with their entire heart. It was both intimidating and admirable to see them get so invested into something. It oftentimes inspired Evelyn and Lacie to work harder.

“Yeah, Charlotte, Idris, Karla, and I think Anthony’s sister are playing this year.” Evelyn said and Lacie quirked a shapely dark brown eyebrow.

“Anthony’s sister? What’s her name again? Sarah, right?” Lacie asked and Evelyn snorted, to which Lacie took a moment to shove her shoulder for laughing at her. That just made Evelyn laugh harder, doing her little pig snort that everyone else found annoying, but Lacie found downright adorable. Everything about Evelyn was adorable to her.

With that thought, Lacie was blushing a little bit, and didn’t hear whatever Evelyn had said. The brunette noticed this and poked her best friend with her finger. Lacie jolted, and Evelyn snorted again.

“Did you even hear what I just said?” Evelyn asked, already knowing the answer. Lacie blushed, it even showing through her tan skin, which just made Evelyn laugh again. At least she was laughing, even if it is at me, Lacie thought.

“Shut up! I was listening! You were talking about, uh, Sarah…” Lacie trailed off and Evelyn rolled her eyes. She huffed a breath, obviously amused.

“Solvo. Her name is Solvo.” She said simply and Lacie scoffed.

“Oh come off of it, I knew that. For sure.” Evelyn shook her head, smiling creeping its way onto her pale face. Evelyn pushed her gold-rimmed glasses up her nose and grinned at Lacie, who saw it out of the corner of her eye, as she was watching the road like a good lil’ driver.

“Anyways,” Lacie continued and Evelyn rolled her eyes amusedly. “Is Solvo any good you think?” Lacie asked.

“What’re you on about? Of course she’s good! We watched one of her eighth-grade games last year together! Don’t you remember?” Lacie tried to remember and eventually found the memory, as that was the game they went to where Solvo drove to the hoop through three defenders. It was very impressive.

“Yeah, I remember. She was the one that drove through all those people, yeah?” Evelyn nodded and Lacie grinned.

“Yeah, she’ll probably be a secondary starter for that. Her speed’s off the charts.” Lacie said and Evelyn nodded.

“I heard there’s gonna be a couple of new players besides them.” Evelyn drummed her fingers on the dashboard, to which made Lacie glance at those perfectly delicate hands, making her face heat up again at the thought. She was a downright mess, huh?

“Oh yeah? Who all is new?” Evelyn stopped drumming her fingers and she put up her right hand, presumably to count off the new players. 

“Well, there’s these girls, sisters. The Mims, I think their last names are. Three of ‘em, a freshmen, a sophomore, and a junior. I know the oldests name’s Darna, I don’t know about the others.” Evelyn paused, seemingly in thought about something before continuing. “I heard Jaq talking about her. She’s apparently real skinny, but she plays post.” Lacie turned on her turn signal, and as she rounded around the corner.

“Hmm… I think I have Darna in my math and Spanish class.” Evelyn’s eyebrows raised a tad.

“Oh really? She smart?” Lacie shrugged.

“I dunno, I’m not exactly the brightest, that’s why I’m in the slower-learning classes. She could just be there ‘cause she’s new and I’ve heard all the smart-kid classes have been really full this year.” Evelyn made an affronted noise and Lacie turned her head to her in confusion.

“What-”

“You’re pretty damn smart, Lacie. Don’t say shit like that. ‘I’m not exactly the brightest’, my ass.” Evelyn huffed and Lacie’s face lit up red once again. Evelyn was too nice, Lacie thought as she pulled into the school parking lot. She looked at the time, which said 3:30.

“Oops, we got here earlier than I thought.” Lacie said, trying to change the subject so her heart could calm down. Evelyn noticed this and she waved off the topic, as she hated seeing her best friend even the tiniest bit uncomfortable. But not before saying her final piece.

“You are smart, Lacie. Just ‘cause the teachers and your family don’t see it doesn’t mean it’s true. You’re the damn brightest one in this whole shitty school, got it?” Lacie’s heart screamed in her chest at those words and the gentle tilt of Evelyn’s lips.

“Evie I-” Lacie coughed into her first. Was she really going to do this? Now? Right before practice? What if she messed everything up?! What if-

“What is it, Lacie?” Evelyn asked gently as she unbuckled her seatbelt and turned her attention towards the panicking girl, trying to calm her down with just her voice. 

“I- I don’t wanna mess this up…” Lacie was breathing a little heavier than normal, and Evelyn’s eyes widened, and she put a warm hand on her shoulder, and cupped another to Lacie’s face, her brown eyes tearing up.

“Shh, shh… What’s got you all worked up, Lacie?” Evelyn asked, and Lacie leaned her face into Evelyn’s delicate touch.

“I, I don’t want you to hate me…” Lacie said, her voice cracking at the end, tears running their way down Evelyn’s pale hand. Evelyn’s eyes widened, and she grabbed Lacie’s face with both hands, making her face her. Lacie gently gripped her hands, her brown eyes wide with fear and wonder.

“Now you listen here, Lacie Hart. I could never hate you. I don’t know what gave you even the slightest notion that I could hate you, but I could never hate you. Do you understand?” Evelyn said gently, but with a force behind her words that made Lacie startle, as she had never heard that kind of seriousness in her best friend’s voice before.

“Now, what is it that you want to tell me?” Evelyn’s bright blue eyes looked into Lacie’s brown ones, eyes twinkling in the afternoon light, sun shining through Lacie’s shitty small red car, making golden light shine onto Evelyn’s pale face and warm brown hair. Lacie’s hands clenched so hard she thought her nails were going to cut open her palms. Her heart was beating so fast it felt like she was going to have a heart attack.

But she had to do this. Evelyn had to know just how much Lacie cared for Evelyn.

How much Lacie loved Evelyn.

“I- I love you, Evie.” Lacie whispered softly into the air and shut her eyes, too afraid to open them and see a potentially disgusted face on her best friend’s face. Evelyn made a confused noise, oblivious to what Lacie was so worked up about.

“I love you too? Is that what you were so worked up about?” Evelyn sounded so confused that it hurt Lacie to have to say it again, have to clarify what she meant.

“N-No, you don’t understand. I love you.” Lacie said and gentle grabbed Evelyn’s head and pushed it towards hers. She made the movements slow enough that if Evelyn was truly disgusted with what Lacie was doing, she could move away at any moment. Lacie’s eyes were closed, so she couldn’t see that Evelyn’s eyes were widening with understanding, but she was still with shock.

When their lips met, Lacie felt like the entire world closed in around them, like nothing else existed besides them and Evelyn’s soft lips against hers. Evelyn didn’t move, and Lacie didn’t wait to see if she would. Lacie pulled away slowly, trying to savor the taste and feeling of her best friend’s lips against hers, the warm that she had felt with no other before.

“Oh,” was all Evelyn said, and the moment was broken for Lacie and her panic came back full force. Evelyn didn’t look disgusted or mad, her face completely emotionless. She was processing.

“Y-yeah. Oh.” Lacie said, if only to break the silence that had settled over the two in the small red car in the school parking lot, forty-five minutes away from their first basketball practice together. 

“That’s what you were so worked up about?” Evelyn’s facial expression finally softened and Lacie made a confused noise. What was she talking about? Was she not mad? What-

Lacie didn’t even see it coming, the quick, snake-like movement as Evelyn wrapped Lacie in her arms awkwardly over the middle of the car. Lacie was thoroughly confused, hugging her best friend back.

“What-”

“Shut up, stupid. C’mere.” Before Lacie could respond, the soft lips were back on Lacie’s. Lacie’s mouth was still against Evelyn’s before the shock wore off and they became pliant against hers. 

Lacie wasn’t even ashamed when Evelyn pulled away and she made a whimpering noise after the warmth against her lips was gone.

“I love you too, dumbass.” Evelyn cupped Lacie’s face in her soft, warm hands again and Lacie leaned into her touch once again.

“I-I’m so happy, I-I-” Lacie was making whimpering and happy little noises as her happiness drowned out her intelligence to speak.

“Yeah, me too Lacie. I’m so so happy that you told me.” Evelyn cuddled as well as she could against Lacie before her eyes met the clock.

“4:00?!” Evelyn yelled and Lacie startled against her chest, then she processed what Evelyn had said and she jumped up, her face a little red from being squished against Evelyn’s body.

“Oh shit, I-I’m sorry, we gotta go! Oh my God-” Evelyn laughed at her best friend as she completely forgot what had just transpired and leapt out of her car, forgetting her keys as she locked it, leaving both them and Evelyn in the small red car. Evelyn was cackling as she heard Lacie’s frustrated scream when she couldn’t open her trunk, and another when she couldn’t find her keys. 

“Evelyn stop laughing and help me find my keys! We’ll be late, hurry up!” Evelyn laughed and smiled so brightly, looking at her best friend with her hands on her hips as she was scowling at the laughing girl inside the car before she spotted her keys and began screaming at Evelyn to “Get off your lazy ass and give me my keys! Do you want to run laps, huh?!”

Yeah, everything was perfect, Evelyn thought as she grabbed Lacie’s keys and opened the door. Nothing could be better than being together with her best friend, about to do something they love together, and just being together just in general.

“I love you,” Evelyn whispered into Lacie’s ear and she blushed red to the tips of her ears, making Evelyn pig-snort again. 

“Hey, y’all better hurry up! Coach Seaburg ain’t gonna wait up for y’all just because it’s the first practice!” Jaqueline yelled and Evelyn waved at her while Lacie rebooted.

“Hey, c’mon, let’s go, Lacie.” Evelyn said and held out her hand when they both had their bags and the car was locked without Lacie’s keys in it.

Lacie looked at her hand, then back at Evelyn, and then back at the hand before taking it in hers gently.

Yeah, this was perfect, the pair of best friends thought in tandem as they made their way towards the school.

Together.

Bee's knees - 1, 7, 9, 14, 16, 27, 48, 77, 83, 99.

1 - The meaning behind my URL

It’s frankly not that interesting–Ashilean is an old character name, and that character just happened to be my focus back when making a lot of my online accounts/a character name that has aged pretty well in my mind. I have recently been feeling a little bit of a shift in naming bias, though, so it might be going out of vogue soon. We’ll see. I still don’t hate it.

7 - Biggest turn offs

I guess like apart from someone just being like an asshole? I find smell can be a really make it or break it thing. Most of the time it doesn’t really matter to me, but every once in awhile there’s someone who’s ambient smell just irritates me. It’s not even like, a bad smell, or an unclean smell or anything. Just makes me kind of agitated when I’m around them. Not so much any more, but I used to get really hung up on that kind of thing.

9 - Tattoos I want

I’ve been thinking a lot about like, two rings maybe about an inch and a half thick just above or below my elbow. Probably below. I don’t really have anything fun behind that one, it’s just a design I’ve fancied for a while now. The other is I’ve toyed around with the idea of getting my grandmother’s surname, Yagi (八木), tattooed on the inside of my upper arm. I guess I just don’t want the entirety of that side of my family to fade away, not that a tattoo will really do anything about that. I have a feeling I know that answer I get, but I feel like I should probably ask her about it before I do anything like that.

14 - Piercings I want

I’m pretty happy with having both my ears pierced–those have always sort of been the important ones. I’ve wanted to get a second hoop in my left ear for a long time, just a little ways up from the one I already have, and I also kinda lowkey would be down to get a septum piercing. Dunno if I could pull that off though.

16 - Favourite movie?

Aaaaah, again really hard, but this time less time-dependent difficult and more just normal difficult. I think if I had to narrow it down, I’d go with Porco Rosso, The Empire Strikes Back, and Singin’ in the Rain. Porco Rosso because I can’t get over the aesthetic, Empire because I’m a nerd and it oozes Star Wars maybe the most out of all of the films, and Singin’ in the Rain for the nostalgia and the nostalgia alone.

27 - First celebrity you think of when someone says attractive

Idris Elba. Feel like I don’t have to explain that one. But also let him use his English accent in more roles.

48 - Have you ever ditched school to do something more fun?

Yeah, here and there. Only a couple of times in high school, and one of those was the pre-designated ditch day, so not even sure if that counts. As for university, I think the only time I’ve ditched school was to sleep. Which is a kind of fun.

77 - Have you ever laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?

No, luckily I’ve avoided that thus far. I’ve gotten damn close, though. There was one time a handful of years ago when I took a very poorly-timed drink during a D&D session and ended up spit-taking part of it because a couple of other party members were being hooligans. Downside: That page of my player’s handbook dried all wavy. Upside: I could always open right to where my class was.

83 - Have you ever glued your hand to something?

Probably like paper as a child, but nothing fun. That was actually something I very carefully tried to avoid back in my avid glue-using days. As I’ve said before and as I will say again: sticky hands just ain’t it.

99 - Have you ever met someone who didn’t seem real?

Shit, this took me ages to think of but oh boy have I. I was chilling more or less behind the library on my campus because there’s this big green area with a bunch of winding paths that eventually lead into more forested areas beyond. As the sun was setting, out of these woods and along one of these winding paths came a man who was moving his legs like one does when riding those weird swivel board things. I thought I realized he was actually just on roller skates, but as he got closer I could see that it looked like he just had wheels screwed into the soles of some sneaker. Like. He was just wearing normal white sneakers and each one had a single office chair wheel attached to the bottom. The guy just cruised out of the forest and down the path towards the library and I’m still pretty sure he was either a cryptid or a fairy.

Thanks for the asks! Always very much appreciated.

Headcanon meme: M O R G A N (bc they're sweet af) P A R K E R (bc they're hilarious af ) J A C E (bc I can) and B I A N C A (bc... I dunno, why not?)

Spell a character’s name in my askbox and I’ll tell you my headcanons || Accepting

Morgan // @highlandxwitch

M: What is their favourite dessert?

Any one of Piper’s recipes (like Grams’ apple pie), but also ones passed down from her family’s native Scotland. Sometimes Morgan likes to put her own spin on things, too.

(that being said, there’s always ice cream + whatever she wants to have with it)

O: What would it take to break them, inside and out?

She’s already lost her whole clan save for her brother, so at this point? Losing Chris. Definitely. (Far more permanently than is usual for him or anyone else in the Halliwell line.)

especially if they’re already handfasted and have had Matthew by the time he dies a slightly-more-permanent death

R: What are their hands like?

There used to be plenty of calluses from all the training her father put her and her brother through growing up, but those have mostly faded now that she’s an adult.

Fingernails are usually bitten down to the quick. Bed. Cuticle.  Whatever it’s called in humans. 

Since she works as a librarian, her hands are a lot softer than they used to be.

G: How do they flirt?

Awkwardly.

A: What are/were this character’s best subjects in school?

Spellcraft

on the mortal side of things, math and literature

N: What do they usually eat for breakfast?

…idk, food? cereal? eggs? whatever Chris makes for her if he’s the one awake first?

Parker // @rebelliouscupid

P: How do they handle money?

Badly. She has a slight idea on how that all works later on, but at the same time it’s like ??? I’m not ready to adult yet??

A: What are/were this character’s best subjects in school?

Drama

R: What are their hands like?

Roughed up and calloused a little. Parker’s not afraid to get her hands dirty when it comes to witchcraft, hand-to-hand, and hunting demons.

K: How do you know when you’ve upset them?

Oh, you’ll just know. 

(she’s not at all subtle about letting you know she’s upset)

E: How are they with children?

Keep them far, far away from her. It’s not that Parker doesn’t like children; it’s more like she’s terrified she’s gonna do something and  break one.

R: What are their hands like?

Answered above.

Jace // @naturalblcnde

J: What’s their sense of humour like?

Dry, sarcastic, dark, sometimes bordering on outright black. Very much European rather than American (which, given Idris is vaguely located in Europe…)

A: What are/were this character’s best subjects in school?

School? What’s that?

C: Can they swim well?

Yes. He just doesn’t swim all that often.

E: How are they with children?

Very protective. (Unless it’s a mundane or a demonic child, in which case he’s extremely annoyed by the former and just wants to kill the latter.)

Bianca // @thephoenix-witch

B: Do they have any allergies?

No. Unless you count people in general.

I: On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do they love themselves?

I’m gonna give her the benefit of the doubt and say 1. Or 2.

A: What are/were this character’s best subjects in school?

Anatomy 

N: What do they usually eat for breakfast?

Breakfast? What’s that?

C: Can they swim well?

Yup. She’s an assassin and grew up in California. Again, how would she not know how to swim?

A: What are/were this character’s best subjects in school?

Already answered.

Jace Wayland*Ghost

The song is ghost by Halsey. I was listening to it and I thought of Jace so here you go.

Masterlist HERE

Wattpad HERE

Prompt list HERE

I'm searching for something that I can't reach...

I had always wanted to be with Jace. Ever since we were little kids I had a crush on him. The first time I had met him he had come to New York because his dad died. I got him to crack the first smile and I said that was my greatest accomplishment even though I forget how I made him smile. I would gush to Izzy about him when we were little. Now, however, things have gotten…weird. We hooked up sometimes but it's not romantic. I don’t have a problem with casual sex or anything but its Jace. I want to be his but right now its just physical. I suppose its better than nothing.

I don't like them innocent

Jace was fun, bold, interesting. He wasn’t some clean cut Idris kid and council wannabe. He did things no one would. I remember sneaking out of the institute with him, Izzy and Alec and it was always his idea. We would sneak out to arcades or the occasional mundane event. Most of the time it was just me and him though. I wanted bold and daring and Jace was just that.

I don't want no face fresh

He wasn’t one to shy away from any situation. He faced life head on and gained experience and knowledge. Even as a young kid he always seemed to look as if he’d done everything a thousand times before.

Want em wearing leather

One of the great perks of being a shadowhunter was the uniform in my opinion. Black is, first of all, an awesome and flattering colour but also it gave the excuse to see Jace in leather jackets. Call me cliché but the bad boy vibe is hot.

Begging, let me be your taste test

The first time anything happened between us I was fourteen and he was fifteen. We were casually talking in my room since Alec and Izzy had some family meeting. Somehow the topic of crushes and first kisses came up. “Let me guess, your first kiss was with that Jackson guy from Idris.” When I didn’t respond he continued to tease fourteen year old me. “Well, it's not like it isn't obvious he likes you. He followed you like a puppy when he was here! Didn’t you go on a date or something?” I still remember being embarrassed telling him. “Yeah, something like that. But uh, we didn’t kiss. I got a bit scared, to be honest.” “Scared?” He laughed. “Of a kiss?” “Shut up!” I pushed him and he put his hands up in surrender. “I've not kissed anyone before. We aren't all players Jace Wayland.” “Kissings easy. Once you get the hang of it.” “That’s the thing though, how am I going to get the hang of it if I haven't done it? Hell, I slammed my door shut when he went to kiss me, for angel's sake!” Normally I’d only talk to Izzy about that kind of stuff but Jace always had a way to get me to admit things I didn’t want to. “Come here then.” I was shocked, to say the least. “What?” “Kiss me. I’ll show you it's not scary. It's just a test.” I thought for a moment. Was I really about to kiss my crush? My dreams shattered when he continued. “It's not like it's your real first kiss if it's with me. It barely counts.” “I dunno…” I trailed off. “Scared?” He teased. I sighed aggressively. I wasn’t scared, I was angry. I was about to kiss my crush and he said it wouldn’t count. Fourteen years old me just wanted a kiss in some way or form so I just did it. “Fine.” Next thing I knew I was kissing Jace Wayland. It was a small kiss at first then it turned into more of a makeout. After just under a minute we pulled away. “See? Wasn’t scary at all.” “Whatever.” I rolled my eyes to conceal my smile.

I like the sad eyes, bad guys Mouth full of white lies Kiss me in the corridor But quick to tell me goodbye

Although that was the first time as we got older the ‘tests’ got more serious. It was after some downworlder party we had gone to after we finished a mission. We were both seventeen since my birthday was only a few days earlier, and drunk. I can barely remember it to be honest. All I knew was the next morning I woke up in my bed with a naked Jace beside me. It wasn’t the last time in full honesty. We did hook up sometimes but never it was never serious. We’ve been doing it for about a year at this point. Sometimes after missions, we would head back to our rooms but on the way, he’d pull me into some random corridor and we’d make out for a bit then go to bed like nothing happened. During this time of hookups and kisses, he would date other people. We weren't exclusive or even together but he still wasn’t as open with me about it. If I asked where he disappeared to the night before he would just say ‘I ran into someone’ but how many people can he run into. I didn’t complain though. We were friends with benefits and unfortunately nothing else.

You say that you're no good for me Cause I'm always tugging at your sleeve And I swear "I hate you" when you leave But I like it anyway...

Once I did get the courage to ask him about us. He told me we were better as friends. That he didn’t want to be tied down. I didn’t want to argue or ruin anything so I told him I felt the same. He told me he was no good for me because I’ll always be chasing him into danger. I told him it was annoying sometimes but in the end, we stayed the same.

My ghost Where'd you go? I can't find you in the body sleeping next to me My ghost Where'd you go? What happened to the soul that you used to be?

I feel like even when we do talk now he’s never fully there. His mind always seems to wander to somewhere else. Its like he’s a ghost, like his soul is gone. Yes, we went through hard times. We all did. Me, Izzy, Alec, Clary and him. He’d went from Jace Wayland to Lightwood to Morgenstern to Herondale within a year.

You're a "Rolling Stone", boy "Never sleep alone", boy "Got a million numbers And they're filling up your phone", boy I'm off the deep end, sleeping All night through the weekend Saying that I love him but I know I'm gonna leave him...

We were hooking up less and less and talking less and less. We were growing apart and it hurt. I was losing a friend and my heart was breaking at the same time. On the few occasions I talked to Izzy about it she asked me why I didn’t end it. Save me the pain. I always said I loved him but I know I have to end it. I've got no choice.

You say that you're no good for me Cause I'm always tugging at your sleeve And I swear I hate you when you leave But I like it anyway...

Even still I know I would follow him if he was running into the heart of the danger. I knew I’d always chase after him when he left. I hate it when he would leave but I liked him anyway.

My ghost Where'd you go? I can't find you in the body sleeping next to me My ghost Where'd you go? What happened to the soul that you used to be?

I'm searching for something that I can't reach

I'm looking for romance in a man who barely understands love. He doesn’t understand crushes and why I wouldn’t want everything to be physical. In truth, I put him on a pedestal. I've come to realise that. I want a romantic Jace but I know it won't happen. I just can't get over him. I even asked Alec how he did it. He said it was Magnus but I don’t have a Magnus. I don’t have anyone else who I’ve thought of in the same way I think of Jace. Sure I've had small crushes but none to overtake Jace.

My ghost Where'd you go? I can't find you in the body sleeping next to me My ghost Where'd you go? What happened to the soul that you used to be?

I need to end this and I am. I start to march down the hall to Jace’s room. I don’t even knock. I open the door and see him lying on the bed reading a book. “Hey, do you need something?” “We need to talk.” He put the book down and sat up. “Ok,” he spoke slowly. “about what exactly?” “Us, Jace. Us.” I began pacing. “We cant just hook up and never talk. Before we were at least friends. Now it's like your just an object. You don’t act like a friend, or like you care. All you do is use me. And don’t say you didn’t know I liked you. I know you knew. Otherwise I wouldn’t have given you my first kiss, otherwise, I wouldn’t follow you where ever you go. I wouldn’t have done half the shit I have for you. But I did. I stayed by you as everything unfolded. I was there for you when your whole life changed but at this point, you’re a ghost. Your body haunts this institute as if to remind us that you’re still here but you also arent at the same time. What happened Jace?” I stopped and looked at him though he didn’t meet my eyes. “Why are you a shell of who you used to be? Why don’t you want to talk to me? What did I do that made me so damn unappealing?!” He stayed in silence for a moment before answering me, looking me straight in the eye. “Because I don’t deserve you. We were so close when we were younger because I didn’t know you liked me back so I wanted to be your friend at least. And since I found out about Alec he told me. He told me to look for the signs from you too. Truth is I did like you. That’s why I convinced you to kiss me when we were younger. I distanced myself because I don’t understand it anymore in truth. I don’t know what I’ll be in a couple years. I might not even be Jace anymore and I didn’t want to drag you along into that.” We were silent for a few moments. “I did it because I care. I still do. But you deserve better.” “You’re damn right I do!” I said coldly. “It's not your choice on what I do or what I can handle. You don’t get to decide what I deserve. I do. So now I've decided I deserve to free myself of this idea of you. I'm not going to follow you into the heart of the danger because I don’t want to anymore.” I walked to the door as he put his head in his hands. “If you had told me this the first time we kissed,” I said without turning around. “then maybe you would've known who you were. Jace, you’re the boy I loved for way too long. The boy who is now a ghost.” It felt like a weight off of my shoulders. It was now all in the open so now only time can tell what will happen. But for the first time in years, I don’t care if Jace is involved.

1-85

1. Are looks important in a relationship?I would say looks are kinda important2. Are relationships ever worth it?Each relationship is a learning experience so yes, I'd say each relationship is worth something3. Are you a virgin?Hahahahahahahahaha.... nope!4. Are you in a relationship?Not anymore..5. Are you in love?Nope6. Are you single this year?Seems like it at the moment7. Can you commit to one person?Oh yeah I can!8. Describe your crushIn all honesty, I don't really have a crush on anyone at the moment surprisingly9. Describe your perfect mateSomeone who's nerdy and likes video games like me... wait, are we talking "mate" as in friend? Or "mate" as in partner?10. Do you believe in love at first sight?Sometimes I do.. it's rare I guess11. Do you ever want to get married?At some point maybe12. Do you forgive betrayal?Depends on the severity13. Do you get jealous easily?Sometimes I can bed14. Do you have a crush on anyone?Not really honestly15. Do you have any piercings?Nope16. Do you have any tattoos?Not yet!!!17. Do you like kissing in public?Full on, crazy make out sessions, no.Quick kisses on the cheek, forehead, lips, sure it's adorable!20. Do you shower every day?Yup!21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?Um maybe? If you do have feelings for me, let me know!!22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?Probs not... maybe? 23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?Oh yeah!24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?No clue honestly25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?Kind of... I'm not really actively looking at the moment26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?Yup27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?Nope28. Have you ever been cheated on?Nope29. Have you ever cheated on someone?Nope30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?Not really but maybe my stomach(?) or my arms (got quite a few scars).31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?Yup32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?Probably...?33. Have you ever had sex with a man?Orally, yes34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?Yup!35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?Yup36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?Oh yeah.. it didn't go anywhere though37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?Ummm can't say I have yet38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?Yeah, that's happened before39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?Yeah, but hasn't everyone had this happened 40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?Nope.. my writing sucks41. Have you had sex so far this year?I wish!42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?Not that long 😉43. How long was your longest relationship?2-3 years44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?3 girlfriends45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?No one unfortunately 46. How many times did you have sex last year?A few times here and there during the summer47. How old are you?23 years old48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?Good luck with your crush!!49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?N/A50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?Probs not...51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?Definitely!52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?Yeah I guess.. and various reasons53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?Nooo?54. Is there someone you will never forget?Oh yeah55. Share a relationship story.Yeah girl I was dating during the school year took me ice skating and I was terrible at it haha!56. State 8 facts about your bodyI have blue eyes, I had knee surgery little over a year ago, I got long, blond hair, I look and sound a lot like my dad (counting that as two), I have a lot of scars from my childhood, I can grow a decent beard, I have a high pain tolerance 57. Things you want to say to an exHmmmm.. "fuck you, blood is not thicker than water. That is a bastardization of the full quote. Family is people you hold near and dear to you... and that doesn't have to be blood relatives"58. What are five ways to win your heart?Being nerdy and kind, like video games, artsy, like cooking, and last but not least: being able to deal with me :P59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)Will do after posting this!60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?Hmm probs 2-3 year difference (she was older)61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?Their kindness... generally I can see it in their eyes and how they treat others or just how it flows from them like a positive vibe62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?Well.. how about you come off anon and I'll let you know 😉63. What is your definition of “having sex”?Two (or more.. depends on what you're into) CONSENTING people trying to/attempting/causing one/each other to orgasm.64. What is your definition of cheating?I mean pretty obvious.. if you are in a current relationship with someone but yet are seeing other people on the side without your partner's knowledge65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?Rolling that sweet D20 in DnD66. What is your favourite roleplay?In all honesty, I generally don't get into roleplay that much.. sorry67. What is your idea of the perfect date?Oooo.. tough. Either a nice dinner out and then out for a movie OR home cooked dinner and just chill at home68. What is your sexual orientation?Bisexual69. What turns you off?Well at the moment: White supremacists and nazis...70. What turns you on?People punching white supremacists and nazis71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?I was working at camp and a few counselors were swimming with no clothes on and told me to join. I jumped in the lake and got all wet 😋72. What words do you like to hear during sex?I dunno.. it's hard to hear with my head between someone's legs73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?Pay off my entire student debt please!!!!!74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?Hmmm... gotta be able to handle dark, twisted humor75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?A friend of mine is buying me a gaming laptop when she has the money76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?Oh jeez... I dunno... I do a lot of sweet things just because it's who I am77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?A few years isn't bad but when it's like an 18 year old and a 30+ year old, I find creepy78. What’s your dirtiest secret?Well today while working my pants split three times in the crotch... oh i did clean out a vacuum cleaner as well! That got pretty dirty!79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?I dunno a while ago? And probs because I saw pics of friends traveling and I'm stuck working80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?A long time ago (not including parents)81. Who are five people you find attractive?Jason Momoa, a girl who works at a business I do cleaning for, one of the DJs at Pride's Glow Party this past Friday night (I was drunk so I don't remember a name.. just that he also could sing... mmm!), Ashe Maree, Idris Elba82. Who is the last person you hugged?My parents count?83. Who was your first kiss with?My high school ex84. Why did your last relationship fail?I guess short and sweet version is that personalities didn't work?85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?Are you asking cuz you're curious or offering anon?If I got to know the person well enough and they would be interested in making it work as well, then I'd give it a shot!